Beans.
My partner and I have a running joke with a friend. Every time he goes on holiday we increase the quantity of beans in his flat.
The first time we bought ~30 cans of kidney beans and hid them around the house like some Easter egg hunt thing but with beans.
The Second time we bought ~6kg dried white beans and hid those in various places. Nearly every receptacle that could safely hold beans became the home of beans. My personal favourite was emptying an oat milk carton, very carefully washing and drying it, filling it with beans and then just putting it back among several other cartons.
He went on holiday again a couple of weeks ago. Obviously there is an expectation of bean-based shenanigans. And obviously we have to beat our previous efforts.
Our friend has (had) a mosaic on his wall of the famous Marilyn Monroe Pop-Art by Andy Warhol. He made the mosaic himself. Over the last couple of weeks we have spent hours and hours assembling a frame, drawing up a pattern and gridding out a 70 x 70 frame and gluing an untold amount of beans to it. I have spent over 21 hours gluing beans to a frames.
For the last couple of days I ended up going to bed at 5:00 am because I lost track of time whilst experimenting with which types of glue works best with different beans (I now have *opinions* on this, y’all). The day of our friend’s return we spent the morning and afternoon grouting the piece and wiping it down and wiping it down again and wiping it down again because grout is just like that. In the evening we went to install the mosaic, just a few hours before his return. Here’s a comparison between the original and our clearly superior replication, and the new piece installed in its rightful place.
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Technically a Cult
So! Danny has been hearing through the Grapevine that a large Cult has been Summoning all the biggest Magical Creature's for some reason. Demon Lord's, Fae Kings, even a few Gods. Clockwork was summoned a little while ago, and so was Fright Knight and Pandora
And he has been patiently waiting his turn for a while. Apparently everyone they summon has gotten a really good deal from them, all in return for a few favors, sometimes a promise to not go to a specific place.
Danny really wants to strike a deal with them. He wants to ask them for a favor so he can get out of work for a few weeks, he's been planning on taking a vacation with Sam and Tuck, but the Eyeballs are being annoyingly resistant.
He feels the familiar pull of Summoning, and realizes that it's time. Awesome, time to meet this mysterious Cult!
...
Why is the JLA standing in from of him?
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cocky bastard vibes - zhongli
ship: zhongli x reader
synopsis: in which reader shares their free thoughts on the liyue statue of seven
notes: standalone snippet part of the bookkeeping!verse
It was a beautiful day in Liyue. The grass was a luscious green and the birds were singing a beautiful song. After a nice stay at the Emerald Maple Inn, you and Mr. Zhongli decided to have a cup of tea next to the Statue of the Seven before heading on your way to Qingce Village. You were to accompany him to pick up supplies for the next funeral rite, and with the way the morning was going, you knew nothing would ruin this peaceful day.
"So how much do you want to bet that Rex Lapis was hot and knew it?”
You ignored the choked sound that came from your side as you gazed up at the picturesque statue. Though your companion would probably consider your question quite out of the blue, you couldn’t say it was the first time you wondered such a thing. Whenever you passed by one of them in Liyue, the thought always plagued your mind for a few hours after. Judging by Mr. Zhongli’s reaction, though, it seemed he did not share your sentiments.
"Ehem… That… certainly is an interesting thought. I can’t say whether or not previous records touched on such a topic."
You hummed, gazing up at the statue. Really? That couldn’t be true. Why wouldn’t anyone talk about a statue looking like that?
“Well there are many reasons why I’d say I’m right. First off, his outfit. He has a hooded cloak on while also being shirtless. There’s absolutely no logical reason to dress like that unless they’re from the deserts of Sumeru, wouldn’t you say? It obviously was a conscious fashion decision. If you pair that with the seductive way he’s sitting, I’d be inclined to assume he’s quite clearly feeling his look.”
Silence came from your side. Hm, Mr. Zhongli still wasn’t convinced? Then you would go on.
“You do see it, right? His posture is relaxed, yet confident. Not to mention the way he’s looking at that cube in his hand with practically bedroom eyes. His knees are apart too. My friend from Sumeru told me that when a man sits like that, he’s displaying his dominance.”
Still silence.
"You can't sit in a seductive pose like that without on some level being aware you look good doing it. I mean look at him! He's shirtless and everything! I've heard even macho fishermen say that they pray to the statue for a good night before coming home to see their wives. You can’t blame them, right?"
A hesitant cough.
"I-I'm sure it was a younger time when those statues were sculpted."
You groaned.
"Maybe, but you’re not even looking! If you did, you’d agree with me that Rex Lapis is clearly exuding such massive 'cocky bastard' vibes!" You countered.
For some reason, the more you spoke, the more flustered he became.
"C'mon, Mr. Zhongli! Why are you so embarrassed? It's not like I'm slandering his good name! I mean, if Rex Lapis didn't want us talking about him like this, maybe he shouldn't have made a statue with abs clean enough to eat off of!"
Okay, maybe at this point, you were piling it on a bit thick. Could anyone blame you? His face was in his hand as if he had a headache, and were his ears tinged the slightest hint of red? It was an interesting sight. Never had you seen him look so completely flustered. Sure you were rather blunt, but you didn't think your words were that provocative. Mr. Zhongli really was practically a 65 year old man.
"I thought you respected the Geo Archon…" He muttered weakly.
You gasped in offense.
"I do! I’d even consider my words the utmost of pious behavior. In Mondstadt, the sisters of the church consider themselves married to Barbatos, the Anemo Archon. So finding the Geo Archon to be a sex god is pretty much the same thing, right?”
“No, it is not.”
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Random Danny Phantom thought.
Danny and them are sitting around somewhere and Dani's there, and Tucker warns Dani to never search for ghost stuff online because the Guys In White monitor that type of thing. And Sam mentions how, a few years before Danny got his powers, she'd done a search for something about spirits and then had to prove to them that she wasn't a ghost or had ties to any ghosts.
And Danny's like, "Wait, they do what? Because every time I get frustrated with my powers, I start searching the web for help with them. ...Never find anything useful, though."
So everyone stares at Danny for a moment, and Tucker asks how he's not in a lab right now.
(A week earlier at GIW headquarters, an agent at a computer mentions to his co-worker that someone just searched for 'how to ghost' from a certain IP address. His co-worker says it'll be coming from Fenton Works. One of the Fenton's kids does that exact same search every so often. It sounds like they're following in their parents' footsteps and searching for how to hunt ghosts. The Fenton kids and Valerie Gray are both on a list for possible recruits.)
When Danny's eighteen (and still has his secret), a Guys In White agent approaches him, and Danny blurts out that no, he's not a ghost.
The agent says he didn't ask if he was...? And then goes on to invite Danny to join the GIW.
So then... Danny might end up deciding to join the GIW. With them never realizing they have a ghost working under them.
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The only One Of Us au I can really see happening is Ford agreeing to Bill's deal only to demand the Milky Way galaxy, and to be allowed to finish living his human life before he goes with Bill. Which is only what? Twenty, thirty years? Yeah sure, have fun, seeya soon Sixer.
There's no clothing swap. Instead, Ford is the one agreeing to the deal. He reaches his hand out to shake, but just before Bill grabs it he snatches it back.
"But first- my price. You want that equation? Well I seem to remember you offering me my own galaxy. You give me the Milky Way, and I'll tell you how to leave Gravity Falls."
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