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ctrlaltsoob · 2 years

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13. phone calls are useless - take a hint (csb)

summary: worrying about anything else couldn’t matter less to huh y/n, who cares so desperately at beating the one and only choi soobin in absolutely everything she can. although maybe there are some things than only can take the trophy for first…

or where two people fail to realise that the line between love and hate is very thin, even though they might be the smartest in their studies.

warnings: angst??? idk if u can call it that, swearing, mentions of violence

a/n: HAPPY HYUKA DAY !!! im sorry for the slow updates i’ve been applying for stuff all week and have to plan for a bunch of things it’s a Mess but i hope u like this chapter

12. minecraft vs. roblox | masterlist | 14. not funny

more under the cut [sns, wc. 3.1k]

“what the fuck are you doing in front of my house at 10 am?”

“i wanted to see odi.”

choi soobin must be another level of stupid. but then again, you must be too considering how you actually listened to him and opened the front door. he’s dressed in the most basic outfit possible and it pisses you off that he looks a lot more than just presentable.

but you’d rather die than admit that out loud.

“are you going to let me in or…?”

“no,” you smile and he scowls. “have a shitty day!”

you shut the door in his face. or at least, you try to, because he wedges his knee between the door and frame to prevent it from closing. and although he’s successful, he majorly underestimated the force of you slamming it shut because he’s positive that a bruise will now form on his knee due to the impact.

despite the obvious pain on his face, you still glare at him like he’s a piece of gum stuck at the bottom of your shoe. it’s almost pitiful the way he clutches his knee in pain — it’s just a shame that you’re already annoyed at him for disturbing your otherwise peaceful morning. he looks up at you expectantly, like he’s waiting for you to feel bad and invite him inside, but instead you say nothing and wait for him to leave.

“are you done yet?”

“you’re cruel,” he frowns at your unbothered demeanour. “it’s been nearly a month since i last saw him. don’t be so heartless.”

“honestly, i couldn’t care less about how you feel,” you say, hand creeping towards the edge of the door to try and shut it again. “if you wanted to see him you should’ve let me know at least two weeks in advance.”

soobin stands up straight, wincing as he straightens his leg. “yeah well, you would’ve found a reason to avoid me,” he states matter-of-factly, eyes rolling at how you blink at him innocently. “and then before i know it, you’ve kept my son as a hostage.”

“firstly he’s my son now,” you’re genuinely offended by what he says, and he clenches his jaw because he can tell you mean what you’re saying. “secondly, i would never avoid you. what on earth are you talking about?”

“haha very funny,” he deadpans. your eyes meet with his and soobin finds himself in absolute disbelief at how you look like the epitome of purity, as if you weren’t the person who locked him in the school’s supply cupboard because you wanted him to miss his exam and fail. it’s strange though, how your wide doe eyes make his irritation subside and he stares a little longer at your face than he should, but he shakes his head and reminds himself that he’s here to see his hedgehog and not you.

“come on, y/n, please just—“ he stops himself as the smug glint in your eyes makes him realise that he’s begged you for something twice now. he sighs and shuts his eyes. “please just let me see odi.”

“if you were polite from the start, i would’ve let you in straight away,” you say, a little too cheerfully that it throws him off. you open the door a little wider so he can walk through, but not too much so that he still has to open the door himself. you don’t bother to offer him the fancy guest slippers as he removes his shoes like you would to any other guest because, well, he’s choi soobin.

as you shut your front door, he wanders off deeper into your house like he’s been around a million times, which to be honest, he has. but that was a millennia ago and you don’t want to think about that right now. soobin’s apparent comfortability in your own home hurts you slightly because you know that he knows the layout of your house like the back of his hand, and that he recognises most of the furniture arranged here. even so, you pretend to be none the wiser when soobin goes into your kitchen and pours himself a drink, partly because he knows you wouldn’t do it for him, and partly because he’d rather do it himself than bother you any further.

you pretend to make yourself busy as soobin gushes at the hedgehog, or whatever he does with him. you’re not entirely sure why he came over because you’ve heard stories from beomgyu about how odi practically ignores soobin’s existence and does his own thing, so him traveling all the way to your house seems completely unnecessary. the extremely awkward silence that fills the room every five minutes makes you regret letting him in, and the small talk that he uncharacteristically starts here and there makes you want to disappear into thin air.

“so…” he starts, and you freeze in place, dread washing over you. “are you going anywhere this summer?”

you don’t bother replying to him. instead, you just stare at him like he’s got two heads and he stares back at you with equal confusion. it’s the fifth time this has happened in the span of twenty minutes, and for some reason he still goes for it despite the obvious hesitance on your face.

“no offence, well actually full offence, but um, why do you keep talking to me?”

soobin blinks at you in shock. if you saw hurt in his eyes, it’s quickly masked up with a scoff. “forgive me for wanting to be courteous then,” he grimaces and you tilt your head further in confusion.

“no i was just wondering why you had to come here,” you reason, suddenly hyperaware of his feelings. “couldn’t you just, i don’t know, call me or something?”

“then this guy wouldn’t be able to see me,” soobin cups the hedgehog in his hands and brings him up to his face. he’s so cute — the hedgehog, not the man — and you momentarily forget that he shouldn’t be in your home, sitting on the floor of your living room.

“right then,” you say, unimpressed with his reasoning. “how long will you be?”

“wow. you really don’t want me here do you?”

“was i too obvious?” you tilt your head and bat your eyelashes at him. he rolls his eyes and resumes what he was doing, essentially dismissing you, which annoys you slightly because you think it’s supposed to be you who ends the converstion.

thankfully soobin has learned that you would rather endure the awkward silence between you than suffer from any small talk, and so after a few minutes of nothing, you wordlessly make your way to him and drop a plate of fruit on the table beside odi’s cage. it’s a harmless gesture, one that you thought nothing of as you prepared some for yourself, so for a moment you’re taken aback when he stares at you.

“what?” you pop a piece of fruit into your mouth as his eyes flick and forth between the plate and you.

“thanks?” he eyes you cautiously as he reaches for a slice of mango on the plate, wary in case you’ve poisoned it or something along the lines of that. “this is just… fruit, right?”

you’re almost offended by what he says. “what else would it be? rice? soup?”

“i was checking to see if you spat on it,” he clarifies and you frown. “not surprised if you did.”

“and you’re still gonna eat it despite not knowing if i did or not?” you watch as he eats the fruit and shrugs, reaching for more as he swallows.

“don’t care,” he mumbles, mouth full of food. “tastes good anyways.”

“disgusting,” you find it unbelieveable how he’s so content with stuffing his face full of your food, when he has no problem using you as his punching bag. “lock the door on your way out.”

as you make your way to the stairs, you hear him mention something unintelligible. he’s quick to catch up to you and bother you once more. the request he makes is absurd. it makes your brain hurt, but for some stupid reason you comply and let him follow you up the stairs.

letting soobin into your home was one thing, but having him in your room is something else completely. it feels like an invasion of your privacy, but that strange feeling you felt while he fed you snacks during the drive home from the airport has made its way back again, and it leaves you to contemplate your feelings on your own.

you know damn well that if any of your friends were to find out that he came over alone, much less into your room, you would never hear the end of it. yet for some reason, you don’t think much of it as he takes a look around, eyes repeatedly settling on your wardrobe.

“what is it?”

“huh? oh,” he shakes his head as you stare at him with wide eyes. he clears his throat before he speaks. “do you remember the winter event we held two years ago? the one with the bake off challenge?”

your stomach twists again as he forces you to recall the events of that damned fair. it’s not a question specific enough to make you feel sick inside, but you know what he’s alluding to and you can feel your head start to spin.

you see, your little rivalry didn’t necessarily start two years ago, but rather that was during the peak of it — if there was ever such a thing. you’re sure that even the teachers had gotten involved at some point during that time. and yet, although there wasn’t an hour where the two of you weren’t at each other’s throats, when it got too cold and it was just you and soobin alone in the school’s hall preparing for the next day’s award ceremony, he had offered you his fleece. well, more like silently chucked the piece of clothing at you in the most unceremonious manner possible, but you suppose it’s the thought that counts.

it might have taken you several minutes to accept it — several minutes that made soobin feel like dying right then and there — but you took it and put it on nonetheless. did you look nice in it? who knows — soobin refused to look at you wearing his clothes anyways, because he knows that if he did, it would be over for him. but as always, you don’t need to know that.

“yes i do,” you say slowly, praying that he doesn’t repeat the sequence of events that just flashed before your mind. “what about it?”

“nothing,” he shrugs, like what he’s just asked you is something that you discuss daily, which by the way, is far from it. “just wanted to see if you still have my hoodie.”

this is new. you two may have been each other’s sworn enemies back then, but even now that you’ve grown more used to each other in recent years, this relationship is still not something solid enough to reminisce in. his audacity never fails to stun you. sure, things have been more civil in the past few weeks, but this? this is just something else.

you’re back is facing him as you process what he’s just said. “y/n?”

“sorry, but why do you keep bringing it up?” you hope your voice is as firm as you think, and that it doesn’t represent the chaos in your mind.

“bringing what up?” the tone in his voice makes it clear that he doesn’t understand what you’re trying to say. it frustrates you, that he’s so quick to engage with you like nothing’s ever happened, that he doesn’t think twice before giving you souvenirs from abroad like he wasn’t the person who made your school life a living hell.

“do you seriously have memory loss?” you’re facing him now, eyes burning into his with a look that he can’t decipher. it seems like determination, but there’s something else with it that he can’t put his finger on. “stop fucking with me. why are you acting like this is all okay?”

you’re more aggressive that you’d meant to be, and you start to regret it when he furrows his brows like he does when he feels as if he’s been rejected. perhaps you’re being too cruel to suddenly just spring this on him out of nowhere, but it’s been bothering you ever since that phone call two weeks ago, and your brain can’t think of one reason why he pretends like this is the norm.

“well, i just,” he pauses, and you feel your frustration growing as the seconds pass. “wanted to be the bigger person?”

the look on his face has you floored. choi soobin? the bigger person? you doubt he even knows what that means.

“is that even possible?” you wonder out loud, and the sour look on his face fuels your ego. is he being serious about that? who knows. if his personality were an animal, you wouldn’t hesitate to condemn him as a snake.

“let’s just let it go, y/n,” he sighs as he leans back on your desk, ignoring the look you give him. “aren’t we meant to be grown now?”

“well i’m not seeing you ever again after this summer since you’re not going to my uni,” you point out and he finds himself unwillingly agreeing. “i don’t see why we have to sort things out.”

this sudden ‘heart-to-heart’ has you screaming in your head. it’s safe to say that you crossed whatever normal was when he entered your home alone, but with every passing second, you can feel that line slipping further and further away. your words are honest, though, and he can tell, but for some reason he keeps pushing this agenda.

“true, but isn’t it better to end it, like,” he coughs, words suddenly stuck in his throat. he takes a minute to right himself, exhaling before be speaks again. “on a better note? or something like that.”

you have a feeling that beomgyu is behind all this, because now that you think about it, he’s been saying this repeatedly over the past few weeks. still, you find yourself shrugging and slowly nodding your head, which surprises soobin, because he didn’t think you would agree with something that he said.

“no thanks,” you scrunch your nose in disgust as he puts forward his hand to shake yours.

“don’t say that you’re not gonna shake my hand just because you think i have cooties,” he scoffs, rolling his eyes as your face falls because you know he’s seen right through you. “so childish.”

“was not gonna say that,” you mumble, hesitantly slotting your hand into his to prove him wrong. it feels like a crime to have his hand in yours — even if it’s only for less than five seconds —, and as you detach your hands, you hope that yours wasn’t as clammy as you thought they were. “go home.”

it’s obvious that soobin’s amused by your suddenly reserved behaviour. his mouth is twisted into something like a smile while his eyes crinkle as they look at you. but despite your incredibly strong urge to just shove him out of your house so that you never have to see him again, you already agreed to being more civilised around each other. you really need to learn to stop holding grudges though, because it hasn’t even been ten minutes since you shook on it and you feel the regret already crawling in.

“are you not gonna walk me to the door?” he asks, tilting his head. his question is a joke, but it still annoys you nonetheless.

“do you want me to punch you?” you mumble half-heartedly, sinking down onto your bed. you hear him scoff as you lie on your stomach, burying your face into the pillow. “go home, i’m sleepy.”

“it’s literally only eleven thirty,” he points out, and you crane your neck to look at your wrist watch. there’s a pregnant pause after you mumble out incoherent words and reposition yourself on your bed.

“glad you liked the bracelet.”

your head shoots up at his words. when you meet his eyes, you expected to see him all cocky and proud, but for some reason there’s a genuine smile on his face.

weird.

you clear your throat. “yeah, well, it’s cute, i mean, the flowers and stuff,” you mumble, looking anywhere but at him. do you thank him again? you don’t know what to say, especially when he’s staring at you with an undecipherable look on his face.

“that’s nice,” soobin nods his head, speaking after a while. you nod your head too, unsure of what to do now. he waves his hand in the air and walks towards the door. “go back to sleep. sorry that i disturbed you.”

for a moment you’re completely stunned, mainly because a) the choi soobin just said sorry, and b) because he’s suddenly being accomodating. you have to force yourself back into reality as you shake your head.

“no, no, it’s okay,” you reassure him and he presses his lips into a thin line, dimples appearing on both sides of his face. “don’t forget to lock the door on your way out.”

soobin only puts his thumb up as he leaves your room, not forgetting to close the door behind him. you definitely won’t be able to sleep easily now, with the way your mind is swirling with thoughts, but you swear it’s only like that because you’re convinced he’ll forget to shut the door properly. yet when you hear the clicking of the lock from downstairs, it does nothing to ease your thinking. instead, you swear it only gets louder.

you sigh, face planted into the pillow again. you just hope no one knew that he was coming over, because that in itself would just be another can of worms that you’re not ready to deal with and get rid of again.

taglist (open): @bergandysam @beepbopbee @minbit @shwizhies

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#choi soobin x reader #soobin x reader #soobin fic #soobin smau #social media au #txt fic #tomorrow x together #choi soobin #soobin #soobin: take a hint #ficscafe

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whatifxwereyou · 3 years

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The Oncoming Storm Part 31: Flowers

Liu Kang x Reader and Kung Lao x Reader (gonna do both, two paths!)

It's time for the CHOICE. You reminisce, finally get the truth of that big memory. Maybe getting a little bit closer to Kung Lao. There's a storm coming and it's time to get ready.

A/N: Wow, the choice is here! I told you it was a weird normal choice haha. I hope you guys enjoy, this has been a blast. Each choice WILL be different enough that the story is still worth reading on both ends. They will have dramatic differences, honestly. Thank you guys so much for reading. This has been such fun.

Schedule change: The Oncoming Storm will diverge into two separate stories here- Firestorm and Lightning. Lightning updates on Monday and Firestorm on Friday. I have a few new stories in the works too so this will give me more time to plan and write. It's only one less day posting, honestly.

Part 30 Lightning Part 1 (Kung Lao) Firestorm Part 1 (Liu Kang) Volcanic Charge Part 1 (Both) Chapter Index

You tried to rest, you really did, but you were having a hard time being alone with only your thoughts for company. For some time, you sat at your desk and tried to read but you couldn’t focus on the notes. Plus, you had terrible handwriting. Liu Kang had been right. You wound up, instead, playing with the flower that rested nearby. You decided you’d cherish it a little bit longer before finding a way to press it and keep it preserved.

Sitting still was torture so you decided to take a walk. A short walk. You didn’t even bother putting on your shoes to try and discourage from going too far. Twisting the stem of the flower in your hand, you walked until you realized you’d gone much further than intended. Oh well. You weren’t pushing yourself too hard. You’d needed a change of scenery and fresh air, that was all. You found a balcony nearby and took a seat near the edge so you could watch the world across the ravine.

It was beautiful.

You twisted the flower between your fingers, admiring the purple petals. It was a small and frail thing. Small but also a sweet reminder of things long past. Those memories were so far from you now in your adult life that it was more like remembering pages from a book rather than scenes from your own history. The story, as distant as it was, was still precious to you.

Memory was a funny thing.

You’d replayed that day over and over in your mind for years after it had happened.

Your grandma had a love-hate relationship with Kung Lao at the time. She’d loved that you had a friend but had hated that the boy had been so rebellious. Your grandma had said things like ‘when you married that boy’. Once, on her deathbed, grandma had asked if you were still with Kung Lao. You’d told her yes because it had made grandma happy.

Your grandmother had always called you sensitive because of your visions, you supposed. You always had the distinct feeling that she’d known more about what was happening to you than anyone else had.

Back then the word sensitive had felt like an insult.

As an adult, you understood that it just wasn’t that simple. Grandma had always loved you even as sensitive as you were. Your mother and father had never been able to look you in the eye after it had begun. You had no doubt that they loved you, but it had been different. At nine years old that had been a lot to process. You would probably benefit from therapy but the monks in Raiden’s Temple were such gossips you were certain you’d have to outsource.

The flower spun above your fingers, and you held your other hand around it to protect it from the wind.

You were out of breath as you chased Kung Lao up the hillside through the thick and overgrown brush between the trees. He was almost constantly just far enough away from you that you couldn’t seem to catch up. Your legs were wobbly, fingers going numb, lips tingling.

Yesterday had been a mess.

You’d fallen in the kitchen while having a fit and had hit the back of your head on the counter. Grandma had taken care of you, but you’d still felt sick that morning. Then Kung Lao had wanted to see you. You’d fought with grandma about it. You begged and pled. After having such a bad day you’d only wanted to spend time with Kung Lao and feel normal.

But then Kung Lao had been funny all day.

He was even a little mean. You wondered what you had done wrong.

“Keep up, weirdo!” He’d called back to you teasingly and you nearly stopped in your tracks. He had never once before called you any of the awful names that the other kids in town had called you. To hear the insult from his lips was jarring, so much so that you thought you’d heard him wrong or imagined it.

“I need a minute! You have to slow down!” You called to him while you caught your breath. You leaned against the tree nearest you and gasped. Your heart felt like it was going to burst, and your mouth kept filling with sick spit. You were uncomfortable. Grandma had made you promise to take it easy. You were going to get in so much trouble if grandma found out that you were running through the woods that far from home.

Kung Lao reappeared through the trees, and he was smiling but still not himself. “What? Are you weak, Y/N? Gonna fall over? Can’t even make it up a little hill?”

“You’re being a jerk.” You coughed and his expression changed, but only briefly. He then turned away from you.

“Keep up, weirdo!”

“Don’t call me that!” The names stung. He’d never hinted that he’d believed those things about you so why was he saying them now? He’d been adamantly against the other kids giving you a hard time because you were different. Now there he was doing the same. Something was wrong but you didn’t understand what. Kung Lao was always difficult to understand when he was acting funny. He kept secrets.

You ran to catch up with him, stumbled over a loose stone, and then fell. You caught yourself in the dirt but hit hard. Your palms scraped against the ground and so did your knees. You sat there panicked and not breathing. Not because it’d hurt. You’d gotten good at handling pain over the past year. It was because you were bleeding and that had become a problem. When you bled, you just kept bleeding instead of healing. You were going to be in so, so much trouble when you got back to Grandma’s.

“You’re too slow, weirdo!”

Your eyes filled with tears.

This had to be a bad dream. Kung Lao would never treat you like this. You got up and watched the blood drip over your torn tights and then ran back through the trees toward your grandma’s farm. You didn’t want to hear those horrible words in his voice anymore. You’d had enough. Everywhere you went they called you terrible names or looked at you like you didn’t belong.

The only place that you had ever felt like you belonged was with Kung Lao and today he had made you feel like everyone else had.

An alien.

A freak.

The farm came into view and so you stopped at the tree line. If you went back, then grandma was going to be upset with you. She wouldn’t yell but she would be disappointed which was worse. Then you wouldn’t be allowed to watch television. It would be just you and the studies left behind by the tutor that came during the week to help you keep up with your education.

You took off your shoes and your tights, then replaced your shoes before using the tights to wipe the blood from your knees and your palms. The blood was quickly replaced. You leaned against one of the trees, hiding behind the bushes in a place where you had often snuck away to read or hide from your family.

The last time that you’d fallen, you’d skinned your elbow and it had gotten terribly infected. You’d been sick for weeks. Your parents had been so upset that you’d felt like you’d broken a rule just because you’d fallen on the way to the doctor. They’d reassured you that it was an accident but the disappointment that radiated from them when they looked at you spoke differently.

Grandma had never once blamed you for the things you couldn’t control. But this had been in your control. You knew that Kung Lao had been pushing you too hard, but you also hadn’t told him how sick you had been that morning and the night before. This was your fault. You should have told him that you weren’t up to the task of hiking wherever he had been dragging you. He’d said it had been a beautiful surprise.

The trip had been a surprise, alright, but not in the way that you had hoped it would be. It felt like a nightmare.

You hadn’t meant to fall! You’d been winded and now your hands and knees were scraped, and you’d be in trouble. Your tights were ruined too. Grandma had threatened to wrap you up in a bubble wrap before sending you off to play with ‘that boy’ and now you wondered if you’d ever be allowed outside to play with him again.

He’d called you names.

For the first time ever.

He’d called you those awful names that the other kids called you.

Tears dripped down your cheeks, your nose was plugged up and you sniffled, burying your face in your arms as you pulled your knees closer to your chest. You cried. You didn’t cry much those days, not anymore. When you’d first gotten sick, you’d cried all the time. Now you reserved your tears for hiding in your closet where no one would see. Your dad would get angry when you cried, something you’d never wanted.

Now you hid your tears.

Footsteps crunched on the grass and leaves beside you, and you wiped your eyes furiously to hide your tears but you was too stuffed up to do it well. Kung Lao sat next to you in silence, arms folded against his knees, watching you. You sniffled and frowned, trying to look mad but you weren’t sure it was actually working.

“We better get you cleaned up or you’re going to get in trouble again.” Kung Lao poked the side of your knee, and you scooted an inch away from him. He scooted with you.

“I don’t need your help.” You held your destroyed tights over your bloody knees to keep them from dipping down your leg. The scrapes weren’t that bad, they just seemed to bleed more than everyone else’s scrapes did.

“Well, it’s my fault.”

“Just leave me alone, Kung Lao.” You tried to shoo him away and he tried to pull the tights away from your knees so that he could take a look. “Stop it.”

He pouted and crossed his legs, hands at his ankles as he rocked forward and then back, letting his hands catch him as he leaned back. “I’m sorry.”

“Go away.”

“I know that those names are mean. I wasn’t thinking. You never react to them when anyone calls you them. They don’t seem to bother you.” He shrugged, looking off to the side as if embarrassed. You relaxed a little bit. “I don’t think I realized how mean it was until I saw how hurt you were just now.”

You sniffled.

“I’m dumb sometimes.” He slumped his shoulders. “You always act so strong. I didn’t think it’d hurt.”

You were used to being called mean names by others but coming from him it had hurt. You were only strong when you heard those names because their opinion of you hadn’t mattered. Kung Lao’s did.

“Can I help?”

“Yeah, I guess.” You sighed. Kung Lao jumped to his feet.

“I’ll go get some bandages!”

“Okay.” You wouldn’t fight him. He ran off, presumably to climb through your bedroom window and get the bandages that were kept on your side table. You wiped your eyes and willed away your upset. Kung Lao often acted before he thought. At least he’d apologized even if it had still hurt your feelings. You were, admittedly, sensitive after the night you’d had.

It didn’t take him long to return. Together you cleaned the scrapes with the little wipes that your grandma had bought and then Kung Lao placed little sticky bandages on your knees. It was sloppy and not how you would have done it, but it was sweet of him to try. Together you wrapped your palms with gauze and he did a much better job with that.

“Grandma is probably going to notice.”

“I don’t know. Your grandma doesn’t see very well. She doesn’t even notice when I’m in your room half the time.”

“Yeah, even so, mom’s going to notice when she visits tomorrow.” He wasn’t wrong. Grandma didn’t have the best eyes. Even with her glasses she struggled to read instructions and usually asked you to do it. But your mom noticed when you had so much as a loose thread on your dress or if your hair was even a little messy.

“You can blame it on me.” Kung Lao grinned. “That way you won’t get in trouble.”

“Mom already doesn’t like you.”

“What? Why not?”

“She thinks you’re a bad influence.”

“I could see that.” Kung Lao laughed.

“I won’t be allowed to see you anymore if I blame it on you. I’d rather just get into trouble for falling.” You picked up your tights. You’d get in trouble for that too. Your mom would go on and on about how money didn’t grow on trees. You’d never liked tights anyway. Besides that, your parents never seemed to be happy with you anymore anyway. What was a little extra trouble?

Kung Lao stood and offered you his hand. You took it and got to your feet. Together you made your way the short distance back to the farmhouse. A fence surrounded the old field behind it that your grandma hadn’t tended to in years. It was overgrown with weeds mostly now.

“When are you going to be allowed to go back home?”

“When I’m better.” That was what your parents had said every time you asked.

“You should just lie and say that you’re better then! Then we can play in town. This is a long walk for me.”

You laughed and climbed beneath the gap in the fence. You had wasted most of the afternoon and if you didn’t get back inside before dark then you were going to get in trouble for that too. You were pretty sure that you were already going to get in trouble. You weren’t a good liar. Every time you tried, you stuttered and got nervous and wound up giving yourself away so you didn’t really try anymore. Except for when it came to lying about if you were okay or not. You’d gotten good at pretending that you weren’t upset when you were.

“I have to go home, Kung Lao.” You waved to him and turned away.

“Wait, Y/N!” He called to you. You hurried back to the fence that he was leaning against, arms folded.

“What?”

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a battered purple flower. Then he offered it to you, averting his eyes and looking shy for maybe the first time you’d ever seen. You stared at the flower in surprise. You’d seen that kind of flower before, but they were mostly red or white. You’d never see it purple before.

“It’s why I wanted you to follow me.” He shrugged and his cheeks were redder than you’d noticed before. Maybe from their afternoon of sunshine or maybe because he was embarrassed. Why was he embarrassed? “I found them the other day and they reminded me of you. I wanted you to see them. Then I was a jerk and you ran away instead so… I brought one back for you.”

You didn’t know what to say. Had he been mean because he’d been embarrassed to do something so sweet? You didn’t know what any of it meant but it was cute to see him acting this way. He was usually so confident.

“You’re terrible.” Was what you went with. He laughed. “Making fun of me just to do something sweet.”

“Yeah, I am pretty terrible.” He beamed, back to his old self just like that. You took the flower from him and twisted the stem between your fingers. It was crumpled up from being in his pocket but it was still special and beautiful. You decided that you’d hide it. Your grandma wouldn’t let you keep it after it died, and you wanted to keep it forever.

“Thank you, Kung Lao.” You smiled and then used the fence to lean up to his height and give him a kiss on the cheek like you’d seen girls do in movies. You’d never done that before to anyone but your mom, sister, and grandma. His face turned beat red and you took a step back, holding the flower close to your chest. He grinned from ear to ear. “I have to go! Goodbye, Kung Lao!”

“Consider lying so that you can come back to town!” He shouted after you and you laughed before returning to your grandma’s house.

You twisted the stem of the flower in your hand just as you had done as a child. There had been so much of that day that you’d forgotten. It wasn’t like you sat in the memory all the time. That next day your mom had come to visit and had brought the terrible news that Kung Lao had died.

You’d been heartbroken, or that was the word that your grandma had used to defend you when your mom had told you to grow up. You hadn’t understood the notion of heartbreak at that age.

That had been what it was though. Heartbreak. Grandma had known your heart better than you ever had.

After that you’d refused to date for a long time. When you turned sixteen your mother had begun to set you up with boys from town or from neighboring towns. You’d fought with your mom about it every time and had reluctantly gone on the dates but had made it clear you weren’t interested. Your mom had told you that Kung Lao was dead and your idea of him was going to keep all other men out of your life. You’d never become a wife or a mother at that rate. You’d fought that wasn’t true or fair to accuse you of. But in the same breath you’d sabotaged every relationship you’d ever had. Your mom hadn’t been completely wrong.

You had ruined every chance at marriage that you’d had until you and your mother had become so estranged that by the time that she’d died you had barely spoken. Your father had stopped talking to you long before then outside of pleasantries around the holidays and only because your sister forced him to be polite.

Every relationship that you’d had outside of your mother’s meddling had ended with you being unable to commit. You’d never liked the idea of becoming a housewife and that was what most men that you met had wanted. You probably hadn’t given them the proper chance to prove that you’d be more than that either, though. Your older sister had settled down with a nice man from the neighboring town and had a daughter. This had continued her long running streak of being the family favorite.

You were okay with that.

Your sister had never been mean to you. In fact, she had only ever defended you. You hoped that she was doing okay. You’d been close. It had probably crushed her to think that you had died.

“Y/N? Are you okay?”

You turned very suddenly at the sound of Kung Lao’s voice, eyes wide and panicked. It was jarring to hear the voice of another person after being so lost in your memories.

“I’ve been standing here for like five minutes. You didn’t notice?” He was leaning against the wall of the entryway to the balcony. You felt your heart slamming in your chest. He was alive and that was still wild to you sometimes. You tried to hide the flower like a moron, like you hadn’t been mooning over your memories of him. It was too late for that. Kung Lao sat next to you. “I broke into your room when no one answered. Sorry.” He grinned and it was that same grin that a much younger him had worn after you’d kissed his cheek. “You were gone so I checked the infirmary, and you weren’t there either. That one monk, your friend, said that she’d left you earlier in the day and wasn’t your keeper. I don’t think she likes me much.”

“Chen.” You offered him her name. “I heard that you were very annoying while I was unconscious so that’s probably why she was snippy at you.”

“Well, you were unconscious for three days and I wanted to see you even if you couldn’t respond to me.” He puffed up his cheeks and pouted as he turned his gaze. You smiled and looked back down on the flower that you had hidden just beneath the hanfu you’d put on.

“Thank you for checking in on me so much. It’s sweet.”

“It’s not sweet. Purely selfish.”

“It’s sweet.” You repeated.

Kung Lao pulled the cloth away from where you’d hidden the flower and carefully took the stem from your fingertips. As you had suspected, there had been no point in hiding it.

“Wilting, huh?” He turned it over in his hands.

“Yeah, that’s what flowers do.” You shrugged and watched the ravine as he studied the flower. “Their beauty fades.”

“Yeah, I suppose.” Kung Lao rested it in his palm carefully, as if worried that he would crush it. You sat silently watching the ravine. “I would fill your room with flowers if it meant that you would be okay.”

You looked to him in surprise and then at the wilted flower in his palm. Your eyes burned with the threat of tears, and you fought them.

“I like having just the one.” You smiled. He cocked a curious eyebrow. “It makes it special. Only one. And the memory of the other.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” He offered you the flower and you took it carefully. “Do you remember that day?”

“Every second of it.”

“You were my first kiss.” He grinned.

“Well, technically it was only a kiss on the cheek, Lao.”

“It counted. To me it counted.” He looked too proud of it to argue with him. How could you? It was incredibly sweet. You gently nudged him. “Are you okay?” He asked, his voice a bit more serious, a rare thing that you both treasured and feared.

“Yeah. I’m sore and tired.” You averted your gaze.

“And…?”

“A little scared.”

“Yeah, I figured as much.”

“Are you okay?”

“Well, that was terrifying, and you almost murdered us.” He considered and you snapped your head to him in alarm. He was smiling, even if there was still sadness behind his eyes. “Watching you struggle with this is all too familiar. I’m just glad that you’re okay now. Feeling more determined than ever.”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah.” Kung Lao stood and offered his hand and you felt your heart skip a beat. This really was far too familiar. “Come eat with me. You haven’t had real food in days.”

“I’m not really hungry.”

“Three days, Y/N!”

“I was unconscious and on an IV.”

“Come eat with me anyway. Maybe Liu will join us!” Kung Lao took your hand and you reluctantly let him and got to your feet. You avoided his eyes as they studied you. “Liu’s fine, Y/N. It’s just a scrape.”

“I was covered in blood, but whatever you say.” You tucked the flower within the folds of your hanfu. “We can go get food but I’m not hungry.”

“Let’s go.” He held your hand for a time as you walked but after a few minutes he seemed to become aware that he was holding it and let go. Then he shoved his hands instead in his pockets. Your feet were sore without your shoes, and you were tired by the time you made it downstairs to the dining area. He helped you grab a plate filled with food and you found a spot across from each other at one of the long tables. You mostly poked around at your food. Kung Lao filled the silence, as he often did, telling you stories about shenanigans that he and Liu Kang had gotten into as teenagers. He spoke so animatedly that you would have smiled no matter what kind of story he was telling you.

You poked at the eggroll on your plate with your chopstick and then pushed a few vegetables aside. Nothing looked appetizing and your stomach was sour.

“You’re not eating.” He pointed to you with his chopsticks, mouth full.

“Oh?” You didn’t think that he’d been paying attention. “I did say several times that I wasn’t hungry.”

“You should eat.” He spoke between bites. “And you shouldn’t worry so much. It’s going to be okay.” He picked up the eggroll from your plate and took a bite out of it with a grin. “If you aren’t going to eat it, then I am.”

“Hey!” You swatted at his hand with your chopsticks, and he stole a mushroom from your plate before eating it with a smirk. A few other monks came to join you but sat tables away from you to avoid conversation. You ignored them but could feel them looking at you every so often before conversing. Chen hadn’t been kidding. This really was far too familiar. You ignored them and you chatted casually before Kung Lao walked you back to your room.

He looked like he wanted to say something before he left but instead, he gave you a hug and promised to see you the next day.

Days past and while you hadn’t see Liu Kang even once since you’d woken up you were getting used to seeing Kung Lao and spending most of your days with him. Even so, you were worried about Liu Kang. Kung Lao had reassured you that he was just busy but you couldn’t help it. Your brain was mean.

On the fourth day after you had woken up, the temple was buzzing with excitement. The remnants of a strong typhoon would be hitting around nightfall. It would go on for a few days. You spent much of that day helping the monks prepare for the big storm. By nighttime you were all to be safely inside because of the lightning and the rain.

In the infirmary, you helped put away the last of the extra supplies they’d gotten with word of the storm. Then you helped the monks that were near the main entrance to the temple, making sure that everything was put away and secure. It felt good to be of use and while every so often someone would whisper about you, they were also kind to you.

Thunder rumbled in the distance as evening approached. It sent chills down your spine. This would be the first storm you’d seen since coming to Raiden’s Temple. It would be a doozy.

You loved what most people would consider gloomy weather. Maybe it was because so many people disliked it that you were happy to see it. No matter the reason, you were excited. You’d been drawn to bad weather like a moth to every light it came across.

Back home you would sit on the patio of your dojo and watch the rain and listen to the thunder until the lightning got too close and dangerous. You missed that.

You should have probably found a safe place to watch the storm from but the view from the front of the temple would be unbeatable. After a few days rest you were feeling more yourself and decided that watching the storm would be a treat.

Now you just had to decide where to watch it from.

The front of the temple? (Liu Kang)

Or somewhere safer inside? (Kung Lao)

You run into Chen (Both)

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obi-wkenobi · 2 years

Text

2021 Fic Review

Thank you for the tag @treescape, @binaryeclipse and @shywhitemoose 💙

total number of completed works: 12 for 2021

total word count: 119,008 for 2021

looking back did you write more, less, or the expected amount of fic this year?: about the expected amount I think. I didn’t set myself any goals for 2021, so anything written was an achievement.

your own favorite story of this year?: Awed (Obikin) or days 6, 9, 12, 16, 19, 22, 26, and 27 (gen.) from my Whumptober contribution. These are the ones I’m quite proud of and am often tempted to expand upon in some way.

did you take any writing risks this year?: I did my first ever month long challenge with Whumptober, which was very hard. I wrote at least half of my entries before the event began, but definitely felt the stress when I found the days catching up with me, and my slow writing, for the rest of the prompts towards the end of the month. It was absolutely worth it though. I came up with ideas and AUs that I never would have considered otherwise, and it was also my first time writing gen instead of ship writing. It helped me realise that I can write certain characters outside of how I’ve always written them.

do you have any fanfic goals for the new year?: no, not really. As soon as I set goals for myself I start to flounder and stress that I’m not going to meet them. For myself, they’re more of a hindrance than a help. However, I would like to open up my inbox for prompts at some point. I’ve never done that before and am a bit nervous about it, but hopefully that’ll happen at some point this year.

most popular story of the year?: In terms of hits, Whumptober 2021, which isn’t surprising considering that I updated it everyday. In terms of kudos, Discovered Desire.

story most under-appreciated?: Probably If you love me, let me go. I spent roughly four months writing this fic, not continuously, but pretty persistently. It’s my least popular fic, but it’s one of my favourites. It’s a sad fic and so that may be why it hasn’t done as well as my other ones. Anyway, I think the emotional nature of the fic more than makes up for the sad ending.

most fun story to write?: Talk to me. I’m not the biggest fan of modern AUs, but this was a lot of fun to write as it challenged me and kept my attention. Also, it was very nice not having to remember all the in-universe terminology and rules that I usually try to remember when writing in the gffa.

most unintentionally telling story?: Easily Discovered Desire. Daddy Obi-Wan? Yes please.

biggest disappointment?: I’ve been feeling quite insecure in my writing in the past two months and I think that’s reflected in my most recent fic, Bloom the want. I’m currently trying to finish up chapter 2 of it, but I’m deleting and redoing everything I write and eurgh, why is it taking me so long?

biggest surprise?: The love that After everything, only us received. I hadn’t planned on writing it and didn’t think much of it when it was completed. Apparently, the fandom really wanted some older Obikin...which yeah, I don’t blame them haha. Also, the feedback and love I had for my Denial, then acceptance series. Many people have told me that it’s their favourite piece of my writing and I’m all?? Thank you, though I never would have thought so. I’m happy with the series, but it’s not my best writing, imo.

my favorite part of fandom this year?: All the new people that have joined the fandom! We reached 5k fics on AO3 in 2021, and considering when I joined the fandom nearly two years ago we only had just over 2k, that’s pretty damn impressive. Now we all need to be prepared for another influx once the Kenobi series comes out.

No pressure tagging!: @unspuncreature @leaffall15 @pontah @lowstandards @gay-cheerios @edge-ofnight

#tag games #2021 year in review #obikin #my writing

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prolestariwrites · 3 years

Note

Are you still writing? I don't see you post as much stuff anymore.

I’m still here, alive and kicking and writing lol… I hope you don’t mind but I’m going to use this ask to give an update on me and what I’ve been doing.

The truth is, I write almost every single day. I have dozens of drafts and another dozen of nearly complete fics for different fandoms. I have some one shots that I never got around to publishing. I also have outlines for stories that I might or might not get around to doing. I have full fics that I’ve written in a discord server with my writing pals that are waiting for me to copy and paste into a document so I can edit and upload.

I’m going to go into my thoughts on these things, where I’m at, and what I’m working on under the cut. Maybe if you’re reading this you can help me piece it all together?

First I want to acknowledge that at least half of what I write, I do with my friend and writing partner @solynacea. We have novels of unpublished stuff that we’ve done just for fun that has never gotten published, and maybe never will. A lot of what I’ve written has been done with them, and many times we’re onto the next idea before editing and uploading and I think we’ve forgotten about half the stories we’ve written, lost into Google chat backlogs until one of us remembers something we can search to find it.

So if I’m doing all this writing, where is it? The truth I guess is that I’m still writing, but for a while I just haven’t been into publishing. And this isn’t going to be a sob story about not getting enough attention or credit, because I stopped looking at kudos and comments a long, long time ago. I like publishing my work because I like to know it’s somewhere where I can find it easily again. (My Google drive is a hot mess.) I like knowing that there is someone who read it and saved it to come back to again. If each of my fics has just that one person, I’m cool with it.

For me, writing is fun and publishing is work. I need to edit, I need to find visuals, I need to think of a title and write a summary and actually remember to update with new chapters. I need to be ready for other people to read it. So I’ve adapted this habit of writing without expecting to publish, and it’s helped me flourish.

But it’s also made me pretty inept at getting anything to the point where it can go on AO3. There is an expectation when publishing that things should be a bit polished. I’ve never been one to just throw whatever up unless I knew it would be finished, because I get the sense that people hate unfinished work. Am I wrong?

If you are asking about NnT, anon, I think we can agree that it’s unfortunately a bit dead. I do have one story to finish, The Dark Fate. I also have some outlines done, a bunch of completed or nearly (like just need one more chapter written) fics, some that were started and left halfway through.

But in general I feel like I’ve told the bulk of the stories I had for NnT. I don’t have much more left. Which really kind of sucks because it was the perfect place for a content creator. There were enough characters that you could interpret in a lot of ways, plenty of lore left undiscovered to flesh out, just fantasy enough to not get caught up in real-world locations or rules, but also not so big you get lost. Yet NnT is over and I’m not feeling the sequel. There’s just no inspiration.

I’m writing for a BNHA zine which is fun, and Kacchako is still one of my fave ships of all time. I have a story I’ve started about them that I can’t seem to get any gas on. The space though feels too big. I enjoy more of what other people do than what I can make myself. I do still want to write this fic though.

As for DMC, it was a nice place to hang my hat for a while, but I’m feeling like I’ve run out of things for it too. I wrote the things I wanted to say about Dante, Vergil, and Nero. I have a couple more chapters to do on The Wish and started writing a steampunk AU, but once those are done I’ll probably close the book, at least for a while. Writing in this fandom wasn’t at all what I expected coming from NnT, and the culture shock sort of zapped the inspiration for me, even though I’ve had a great time and met some great people. I also ended up liking the reboot more than the main games and finding anyone else in the same boat is like a needle in a haystack.

So what’s next? I’m on the hunt for inspiration. I’ve been catching up on Resident Evil and started writing for it. I’ve been editing an original work (supposed to be anyway, haha) and writing more original work with solynacea. I’ve tried my hand at the Witcher and looked into getting into other fandoms but nothing is striking my inspiration. Tried writing threads for a bit but it’s not my style. There are tons of things that I love, but it’s a whole other ballgame to have your own stories to tell outside of the original, and that’s what I’m waiting on.

I hope if you’ve read this far you can see that it’s not a lack of motivation or interest, just inspiration. I'm an author in need of a new home, so to speak. I’m not in a writing rut, and there are thousands and thousands of words unpublished that I’ve written over the past year since my publishing slowed down. I hope that RE can give me that push, and if it doesn’t, I’ll look for something else. Any ideas, anon?

In the meantime, I wonder, do you guys want rough or partially-finished stories though? Let me know. I can publish if you guys know what you’re getting into by reading it lol. And I don’t mind comments when people ask if I’ll ever finish xyz fic or asks like these that are about what I’m up to, so hit me up any time.

#personal #thanks for the ask!#and thanks for reading #maybe since there are people still out there I'll take some requests?#hmmmm #please feel free to add anything #free to comment or reblog if you agree or disagree

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hobidreams · 4 years

Note

Hi Rain!! So sorry this feedback is kinda late, I just feel I needed to really do October 1865 justice cus it was hands down one of my favorites thus far!!! The whole thing, from beginning to end, was so thoughtfully written. Like when she finally dons the pink hanbok and is inspecting her appearance in the mirror and wishing her mom was there for advice/guidance really hit hard. Like she really is all alone in this great big palace with no family and minimal friends. And I find that I’m always

PLS DON’T APOLOGIZE & TAKE ALL MY LOVE INSTEAD AHHHHH 💖💖

rooting for our dear mc, she feels like an underdog to me. Quiet, demure, poised, low ranking, but incredibly sweet and giving. “So far, you’ve begrudgingly won a few scraps of respect from the male physicians, and it’s a start.” LIKE YES GIRL GET IT. And when Yoongie comes to her door to get her?!? The equivalent of a man getting out of the car and walking to your door to pick you up on your date. LOVED IT.

WAIT I DIDNT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT LIKE THIS BUT UR RIGHT LMAOOOO

And the description of his appearance was perfectly detailed- I can imagine exactly what he looks like!! Well done. He truly is “unfathomably handsome.” I especially enjoyed the lil tidbit of the two of them looking suitable for each other despite their marked difference in social status and rank. As if, at least for the night, they’ll look like they belong together. It warms my heart. I love that this Yoongi is still lighthearted with the way he jokes with Eunuch Kim. It’s so nice to see him like this, but continues to make me wonder what else happened to him to change him so drastically???

*slow, calculating laughter here* heheh i’m glad u enjoyed the clothing bits though! that’s one of my favorite aspects of the history to research :’)

Her excitement to see the Chuseok festivities is so palpable, and when she realizes “oh god, you just made the prince run” I WAS CACKLING HAHAH and the Jinkook appearace!!!!!!!!!! I WAS HOWLING. I love that you kept the basic appearance of the two from the mv. What a creative way to weave them into the story!!! “the bearded one looks about seconds away from giving the other younger man a good smack with the fishing rod leaning on the wall behind him.” HAHAHA SCREEEEEAM their competitiveness and banter is perfectly written!!! “Yah, you can take your beans and shove them right up your nasty sokgot… I’ll take two orders of each. Preferably not ones shoved anywhere.” I’M ACTUALLY DYING. The dialogue here is hilarious!!

me: sobbing because humor is so hard & you are so kind T_T

And the way Yoongi passes off the treats to mc and Eunuch Kim!! And when they get mistaken as a couple by her mother’s old friend?!? CLASSIC. I’ve found that old ladies literally give no fucks. I had a patient who would thirst over the same co-worker that I did (and yk, fair, cus he looked like an older, taller JK) She was shameless about it and I wanna be her when I get older haha

FDSLKDAFS MOOD I WOULD TOO HAHAHAA have u SEEEN JUNGKOOK LATELY??? that BUN? THE SHEER SHIRTS? im D E A D. PHEWW. but seriously old ladies never change, no matter the era HAHAH

ok, but one of the best parts is Eunuch Kim losin his cool over Chun-ja. The way he nearly drops his jeon and is soooo flustered has me so heart eyed for him. I’m so happy to finally be meeting this lucky woman who has ensnared our beloved Eunuch Kim’s heart!! And those letters?! Ugh, I am so fond of hand-written letters. They’re so nostalgic and personal and no one seems to do it anymore.

heh i’m glad u like letters because-- oop i wont say anything more ;)

Don’t think I didn’t notice that Yoongi chose the bracelet she was eyeing. But are we gonna see him give it to her?? Or does he just secretly have it slipped into her room, cus that would be SUCH a yoongi thing to do. My favorite part though, if I HAD TO CHOSE, was probably the ending scene at the pond. I feel like this is the first time they’ve had the chance to have a REAL conversation. And how her theory that some things in the world are out of their control but can change in their favor if they never give up. Seems like it parallels their predicament perfectly.

you may be the only person who’s picked up on that conversation FDASLJKAS but yes, it truly is ;-; i absolutely adore those quiet moments between the two of them & writing this one was... phew a ride and a half. there’s a lot of subtext there 🤣

But I need to know!!! WHAT DID THEY WISH FOR?!

iono 🤭 (youll find out later)

Ugh sweet Yoongi is killing me. I love him, but damn knowing what he’ll become in the next few years has me heart broken. As always, well done Rain. What a chapter to come home to after a long weekend of work!! I’m so appreciative of your writing. Your page is always such a safe and comforting space. Your positivity and kindness really reinforce my idea that you’re a wonderful human being. I hate that you had rude ass anons leaving their trash comments in your asks. As King Yoongi would say, “they’re peasants!” fuck the haters, bubs, and keep shining. You’re a fantastic writer, and I hope that you keep writing what inspires you, and deliver it the way you want!! I know I’ve said it before, but I feel I need to say it again, but I LOVE the way you decided to present MLT. I LOVE the drabbles and the timeline. It’s unique and fresh and will always remind me of MLT. ILYSM, Rain!! As always, please accept all my love and adoration!

sighhh you are so so so lovely. thank you for taking all this time out of your busy life to send me this. it just warms my entire heart. please don’t worry abt my anons; they’ve actually been pretty nice!! i havent ever had a mean anon ever in my inbox or anyone purposefully being cruel in my comments so my frustration was more at seeing how my friends are contiuously disrespected for providing their FREE content. AGH. and they get rebuked if they reply with annoyance, which they deserve to do after being pestered over and over again!!! someone said they had 20 asks in their inbox asking for updates and AGGGGHHH !!! that makes me wanna tear those anons a new one. but anyway. it’s wonderful people like you that keep us going & i wish i had a better way of giving you my gratitude because it doesn’t feel like enough. thank you 😭💗 pls take this happy boy and i hope you have the fantastic day you deserve!!!!

#lcksndkys #rain reply #ily ily ily #moonlit throne

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toothpastecanyon · 4 years

Text

Noie’s Brother, Chapter 11

Fate sometimes rhymed, but Alcor felt like this one was a little on the nose. A newborn Mizar fading away in the hospital and a loving father pleading to him from behind a circle of candles.

Fate sometimes rhymed, but Naomi Argenta just wants this stupid vampire to stop harassing her brother. It’s making him go… weird.

A huge thanks to @feferipeixes for helping to beta read this chapter!! Also I made a few minor references to President Chancellor - if you’re curious, that comes from their awesome fic Lucy Ann and the Lunch Bunch! You definitely don’t need to read it to understand this chapter, but I think it’s a really cool piece of writing and I’d recommend it to everyone!

See most updated version on Archive of Our Own.

________________________________________________________________

It was another long day for Noie. Another long, weird day spent sneaking glances at Dipper and jumping at the sound of school bells. Another day spent keeping conversations short and strategic, vague and unhelpful; keeping certain topics close to her chest, like cards in this weird game she was playing with her brother.

Playing, not talking.

“Oh, wow, Dipper, you’re right, that doesn’t make it sound like vampires can affect your dreams that much… but who knows, maybe it’s a super powerful one! I got some more books for you on that!”

Acting, not reacting.

“Your shoulder hurts? Oh no, bro! It’s probably from all these nerdy books you’ve been hunched over all day today - c’mon, sit back for a second.”

Showing, but never, never telling.

“Nervous? Haha, what’ve I gotta be nervous about, bro?” Her eyes flitted towards the clock in front of the classroom. “We’re going home soon! Going back to the house, yeah…”

Dipper opened his mouth to reply, but then he hesitated, closed it, and turned back to his notes without protest. The look on his face… it put a strain on her smile.

She didn’t remember when he’d stopped arguing with her.

“And I believe that is all I have for today!” The teacher’s voice made Noie glance up at him; she watched his brow furrow at the rustle of people reaching for their bags. “Hey, hey! Did I say you could pack up? Everyone can stay in their seats and talk - quietly! - with your neighbors until the bell rings. Let’s have a little patience, alright? Thank you.”

With that, he strode over to his desk and sat himself down behind a computer, leaving the room to fill with chatter. Noie looked down the many rows of students in seats, textbooks on tables, and the top of her teacher’s face bobbing up and down above his monitor, cut off just above his eyes.

No one was looking her way, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that had kept her on edge all day today.

The feeling that she was being watched.

Noie shivered at that. She opened her mouth, hesitated, pressed her pencil against the desk until the lead broke, then swept the mess away and turned to Dipper.

“Going to the store today.” Her words came out too quiet; she cleared her throat. “Dipper?”

He didn’t look up from his notes. “Yeah?”

“We’re going to the store today, okay?”

“Okay…” Dipper said, but confusion quickly spread across his face. Now, he looked up at her. “Wait, what? The store?”

“Yeah!”

“Why? I thought we were good on food and stuff this week.”

“We’re low on ibuprofen.”

“I mean, not that low. No need to make, like, an emergency shopping trip-”

“It’s not an emergency!” Noie cut in. When he frowned at her, she grinned and gave him a nudge. “C’mon, bro! It’ll be good! Why’re you giving me that face?”

Dipper took a moment to respond. He looked down, covered his face with his hands, and kneaded his forehead. He let out a groan, then: “Ugh… sorry, Noie.”

“Aww, don’t be sorry, bro! We’ll get you the extra strength tablets, alright?”

“No, it’s just… can we do this some other day? Please?” He sat back, still rubbing his face. “I’m not really feeling a shopping trip right now - my head hurts, and my shoulder still feels weird, and the whole… whole deal with the vampire… I kind of just wanted to go home.”

“Aww, Dipper…”

“You can go if you want, I’m not saying that. Just let me-”

“No, you can’t go home on your own!” She thought of Lucy Ann in the backyard and shook her head. “Look, it’ll just be-”

“Noie, please? I, really really don’t want to.”

“But-but-” Noie stammered. “But you promised!”

At that, Dipper hesitated. He lifted up his head and raised an eyebrow at her. “I promised?”

That look he was giving made her cringe. She racked her mind for some kind of answer. “Um, yeah! Back at the- back on the bus! This morning! Before, uh, you went to sleep!”

“I promised… to go on a shopping trip?”

“You don’t remember?” Noie could see a little uncertainty creep into his frown. “We were sitting there, going to school, and you were like- um, I was like… actually, you were like ‘Let’s go to the store!’ and I was like ‘yeah!’”

“But why would I-”

“Because…!” Her eyes landed on his textbook. “Because vampires! I mean vampire stuff! We were going to buy vampire stuff, remember? For your dream things!”

He blinked. “Oh… we were gonna buy, like, garlic or something?”

“Yeah! Haha, you could put some garlic under your pillow - that’d stop anybody from getting too close to you!”

“Heh, yeah… I guess that does make sense. Not the garlic under the pillow thing, but yeah, we should stock up on that stuff.” Dipper opened the book. “Thanks for, uh, reminding me.”

Noie didn’t say anything to that. She just sat there, and smiled at him, and twisted her pencil ‘til it snapped in two.

The bell rang. Dipper looked up.

“Oh, nice.” He closed his book. “So, uh, are we going to the convenience store, or the store store… oh wait, I’m dumb, they don’t sell garlic in convenience stores. Heh, you ever just immediately answer your own question like that, Noie? Noie?”

His words washed over her. She stared through his face, and for a moment even the churning pit in her stomach seemed so very far away…

Then he touched her and she jumped.

“Hey!” She started to knock his hand away, but gave it a quick pat instead. “I mean, hey. Oh, cool, did the bell ring? Alriiight, school’s out!”

“Noie, are you-”

“Fine! Fine! Everything is fine!” Noie shoved her book into her bag. “Everything is completely fine and let me just zip this up here, aaand done! Alright, bus! Bus bus bus!”

She jumped up and flashed him her brightest smile. He returned a frown, his face a mixture of concern and confusion and frustration that put a lump in her throat. She swallowed.

“What?” Her voice came off angry; she barked a laugh to try and soften it. “Hah, what’s up with you? Why the long face? I said I’m fine.”

Dipper looked down. He didn’t say a word.

“I am fine, okay? Dipper?” Noie’s smile stretched paper thin. “Cool, good talk. Well, we’ve gotta catch our bus now, okay? Come on.”

She stepped away, and he followed just behind her. The hallways were already quite empty, and the odd group of chattering students didn’t do much to distract from the looming silence between them.

Down the stairs they walked. Out the building. They rounded a corner, and Noie found herself staring down the main gates, and the glowing figure standing guard beside them.

At that, she caught her breath. She slowed down to walk with Dipper, and they walked closer, closer.

She shot him glances. Stared at his soft brown eyes. Linked hands with him, and tried for a smile when that made him raise an eyebrow at her.

“Hey, Dipper.” She squeezed his hand. “I love you.”

“I… love you too? Why are you saying it like that?”

Noie opened her mouth to respond, but the words shriveled on her tongue when she saw his eyes flicker black on gold.

At first it was just a flash; it was hard to tell if it’d been a trick of the light, and Dipper looked concerned at the sudden shock on her face. He squeezed her hand, and opened his mouth, but they walked closer and his eyes kept flickering.

Kept flickering, and emotion drained from his face. Noie looked away, but she could feel his gentle squeeze get tighter and tighter and tighter until it felt like her hand was going to fold down the middle - ow.

She sucked in a breath, kept her head down and kept going.

Kept walking.

They were nearly there.

Nearly through.

Dipper would be back soon, she told herself.

Dipper would be back soon.

Dipper would be back soon-

“Hello, child. Please wait.”

Those words came through a chorus of voices - the angel. Noie frowned at its glowing boots, and reluctantly came to a stop.

“Um, hey?” She cringed as Dipper’s grip tightened even more. “Do you need something? Not that it’s, uh, not nice to see you and all, but I can’t really stay and chat-”

“Oh, I have no favours to ask of you. Quite on the contrary, I have listened to your needs and taken it upon myself to - oh, shall I use a human colloquialism here? There are so many to choose from; your language is charming in its inefficiency, I must say.”

“Can we maybe get to the point?”

“‘To the point’ - heh, there’s one of them. Yes, let us ‘get to the point.’” The two officers cleared their throats, and then a man stepped forwards. From his rubbery gloves and dark blue apron, he looked like one of the people who worked in the cafeteria. He gave Noie a too-wide smile, and then reached into the pocket of his apron and drew out…

“Oh. Garlic?” Noie made a face. “And a hammer. And a… a stake. That is an actual stake you’ve got there. Um.”

“I have blessed these with the cleansing light of my innermost essences. They will be far more effective than any equivalent one could purchase at a human marketplace.” The man held them out to Noie with a grin. “You’re welcome, child. Or as your kind may say, ‘it’s on me.’”

“Uh…” Noie shuffled back. “Thanks, buddy, this is real… real thoughtful of you, but I think I’m gonna pass on your, um, innermost essences.”

“Pass?” All three heads cocked in unison. “You are refusing my gifts?”

“I mean, refusing’s a strong word, but y’know, my folks like getting points for gas when I use their card, and I’m pretty sure that stake thing is actually super illegal, so…”

She trailed off. The men just stared at her, faces completely blank.

“...so yeah? We’re still good? Still…” Noie heard a deep rumbling sound start up beside her; she glanced over to see Dipper baring his teeth at the angel, face contorted with rage. “Oh, he is… he is growling right now. Okay. Um, I think I’ve gotta go? So bye?”

She stepped back, and stepped back again. The angel didn’t react, so she flashed a smile, snapped a wave, and dragged Dipper out of there at the fastest walking speed she could manage.

She didn’t look back. She didn’t look at Dipper. She kept her eyes facing forwards, fixed on their bus as it pulled away from their stop and drove off into the distance.

________________________________________________________________

“Dipper? How’re we holding up, bro?”

“Ughhhhh…”

Noie made a face at her brother, who was currently crumpled on a bench outside the supermarket. She waved off some concerned-looking shoppers with a “Don’t worry, he’s okay!”, then gently pried one of his hands off his forehead and pressed a packet of frozen peas into it.

“Here,” she said, and tucked a receipt into his pocket. “And keep this too, just in case. I’m ninety nine percent sure nobody’s gonna ask for it, but hey, people are jerks sometimes, y’know? Hah!”

She laughed, but Dipper didn’t respond. He wasn’t very talkative at the moment - he hadn’t been since that encounter with the angel at the gates.

The memory sent shivers down her spine, brought back flashes of glowing golden eyes, of growling, of looking down at the ache in her hand and seeing actual claw marks in her skin… Noie shook her head clear, and rose to her feet.

“Alright, you wait here.” She hesitated before patting him on the shoulder. “I’ll be super quick, okay? Pinky promise.”

Dipper managed a nod.

“Yeah, that’s the spirit!” With a grin, she stepped away. “You’re the best, Dipper! Love you!”

Noie took a few steps backwards… then a few more, and a few more not quite able to take her eyes off him. There was a pit in her stomach when she looked at him sitting there, all alone, with his head buried in a pack of frozen peas…

Maybe this was a bad idea.

Before she could think too much on it, there was a “Hey!” and Noie had to dodge a cart she’d wandered into the way of. The man pushing it shot her a glare. “Watch where you’re going!”

“Sorry, sorry!” Her cheeks burned as he stalked past her. “Sorry…”

Then she cleared her throat, glanced one last time back at Dipper, and made her way inside before she got in anybody else’s way.

She’d be quick.

Noie grabbed a basket from the side and held it in the crook of her elbow as she linked her fingers together. One hand rubbed the claw marks on the back of the other as she made a beeline to the fresh produce - it was right by the entrance - and picked out a head of garlic and some pumpkin seeds. She spotted some bananas and remembered they were out, but a split second later she also remembered Dipper hanging on for her for outside and skipped past them to find the painkillers.

Ugh, the medicine aisle was all the way on the other side of the store. She rolled her eyes and broke out into a little jog as she made her way there; the extra strength ibuprofen was about halfway down the aisle, and she picked one out - no, two. Just in case.

Noie tossed those into her basket, and grimaced at her little collection.

Alright. That should keep Dipper from getting suspicious about this shopping trip.

Now for what she actually needed to buy.

Noie paced the aisles a little bit before she found the one she was looking for. Fridges full of frozen meals lined one side, and on the other was a man choosing between two bottles of wine; she pretended to stare at the frozen meals until he sighed, threw both of them in his cart, and shuffled off.

With a shiver, she looked both ways and headed to a very small section tucked to the very back of the aisle, labelled ‘Vampire Products’. Between that title and the bright red bloodpacks dangling from each shelf, it was obvious a human like Noie was not supposed to be opening this particular fridge.

So she did it quickly, and moved away to examine the squishy bag of gross that was now in her hands.

It was cold to the touch. The plastic felt thin and clammy - kind of like seran wrap, Noie thought, and with that analogy in mind she was careful not to squeeze it too hard. The label was plain white and noticeably devoid of branding; apart from a logo and tagline tucked into the corner (‘Sated Solutions: Keeping Our Streets Safe Since 2029’), the rest of the space was packed with warnings, each one delivered with more CAPITALISED WORDS FOR EMPHASIS than an angry internet post:

BLOOD PACK FOR VAMPIRIC CONSUMPTION ONLY: 495ml WHOLE BLOOD, COLLECTION DATE 04/25/85

CAUTION: THIS PRODUCT IS NOT SUITABLE FOR USE IN TRANSFUSIONS.

CAUTION: THIS PRODUCT IS NOT SUITABLE FOR GENERAL CONSUMPTION. CONSUMPTION OF HUMAN BLOOD MAY LEAD TO HEMOCHROMATOSIS (IRON OVERLOAD) WHICH CAN CAUSE ORGAN DAMAGE, IRREGULAR HEARTBEAT, CIRRHOSIS OF THE LIVER…

It went on, and Noie skimmed the rest before gingerly placing it in her basket and proceeding to self-checkout. No drinking the blood, got it.

She scanned the garlic and the seeds and the ibuprofen, and put them in a bag. Then, with a quick glance over her shoulder, she scanned the bloodpack and shoved it into another bag as fast as she could. She wrapped that bag up, put it in with the other stuff she’d bought, then got out her grandfather’s card and went to pay.

The bloodpack was twenty-five dollars. Noie muttered a little ‘sorry’ to the card reader as she typed in his pin.

(This was just a one time thing, she reasoned. She only needed it to last a few days… it’d last that long, right?)

(Seriously, how much could a vampire even drink?)

She doodled a little heart on the signature line, and took a deep breath to to steady her own racing pulse as she waited for the beep. Once it went through she pulled out the card, grabbed the bag, and darted for the exit.

“Dipper? Dipper!” She called his name before she could even see the bench. She rounded the corner, and- “Dipper, there you are!”

Dipper had sat up, and was giving her an odd look. “Yeah? You told me to wait-”

“I’m sorry I was gone so long!” Noie wrapped him up in a hug. “I’ve got everything you wanted though, so- oh! How’s your head feeling?”

“Not great, with you yelling in my ear like that.”

“Sorry! I mean, sorry… You okay, though?”

“Yeah… I’m feeling a little better.” He rubbed his forehead. “I’ll be fine, I just want to go home and lie down for a bit.”

With a tight smile, Noie drew back. “That’s fair, bro. We’ll go home now.” She helped him to his feet. “We’ll go straight home, and you’ll go straight to bed, okay? Okay. Ohhh-kay.”

________________________________________________________________

Noie had this evening all planned out. Dipper was going to go sleep off his headache, so she’d take that time to slip the bloodpack to Lucy Ann. She could do that in five minutes, then go pick up a few more vampire books from Grandma’s study; if she dumped some heavy ones on his lap as soon as he woke up, she could probably keep him in his room all night. There’d be no chance of him even seeing the vampire!

She opened the front door, grinning to herself. This was good! This was a good plan. Then she could wake up early, and do breakfast in bed...

“Hey, kids!”

Wait, what?

“Good day at school? Say, aren’t you back earlier than this most days?”

Noie stared at her grandfather, who was sitting in the dining room and reading an actual newspaper. She was about to ask where her grandma was when-

Oh, stars.

Oh, no...

“Everything alright?” David frowned at them. “You two look terrible.”

Dipper was already shuffling towards the bedroom. “We’re, uh, fine, Grandpa… I got a headache today.”

“Another bad one, eh?”

“Yeah. I’m going to lie down.”

“You do that, kid. You’ll feel better.” David watched him go, forehead wrinkling in concern. “Might need to take him to the doctor… hey, Naomi, what’s the, uh… the number for the lady your brother sees? D’you know where Allie kept it?”

Noie didn’t answer. She didn’t hear the question. She was too busy staring at her grandmother.

Sitting outside.

Talking.

Laughing.

Lucy Ann.

“Naomi?”

Where was Lucy Ann?

“Naomi!”

Noie blinked. Her grandfather was frowning at her, now.

“Will you listen to me, kid? I was asking you a question. I wanted to make an appointment with the neurologist for your brother; I’m getting worried about all these headaches he’s been having lately-”

“Oh, I can set that up.” She blurted out, then: “Why’s Grandma outside? Who’s she talking to?”

“Huh?” David glanced outside. “Oh, uh, she’s… She came out with me while I was tryna see what was tapping at our porch this morning, and for some reason she didn’t want to come back inside. Wanted to keep sitting out there.” He stuck his nose back into the newspaper. “Don’t ask me why. It’s hot as… it’s hot today.”

Noie watched Allie let out a laugh. She could hear the faintest bit of it come through the glass, loud and happy. “B-but who’s she talking t-”

“She’s fine.” He cut her off. “Everything’s fine, she’s just… practicing an old speech of hers or something, I don’t know. I’m just waiting for her to come in so I don’t have to keep sitting on this damn chair - my back’s screaming for the couch, I tell you.” He looked down at the bag in her hands. “Did’ja go to the store?”

“What? Oh, uh!” Noie hid the bag behind her. “I just- we got garlic.”

“Were we-”

“Yes, we were out!” Darting over to the counter, she dumped the garlic and - she’d find a home for it later - the pumpkin seeds into the fruit bowl, then squeezed past the dining table to get to the porch. “I’m going outside!”

“What? No, don’t…” David hesitated, thought on it for a second, and then sighed. “I mean, uh, I guess you can if you really want to. I don’t know why I’m saying no, I don’t see the harm.”

She gave him a hug as she passed his chair. “Thanks, Grandpa!”

“What are you- oh, hugs, alright. Yes, yes, you’re very welcome for, uh… well I’ve been thinking, and, y’know, I say no to a lot of things that maybe don’t matter so much, and-”

“Oh! You need to go away, Grandpa!”

“Excuse me?”

“I mean…” Noie tore her eyes away from the porch, and gave David an awkward smile. “Why don’t you let me keep an eye on Granny?”

He raised an eyebrow. “You want to sit out there and watch her?”

“Yeah! A-and you can go back to the couch and watch TV and not be right here?” Her smile stretched wide. “Doesn’t that sound nice? That sounds nice to me.”

“I’m not sure… you know you can’t walk off on her, right?”

“Of course! I would never do that!”

“So you’re gonna stay out there as long as she’s out there?”

“Pinky promise!”

Hmmm…” He narrowed his eyes. “Why’re we so eager to look after Allie all of a sudden?”

“Cause she’s my Granny and I love her? I don’t need a reason to wanna hang out with her!”

“That’s… I suppose that’s true, but-”

Noie forced a laugh as she plucked the newspaper out of his hands. “Besides, I have to rescue you from this. Don’t you get news on your phone?”

David tensed at that; oops, she'd hit a nerve.

“Ohh, can’t you get news on your phone?” He imitated her voice in a mocking falsetto, and she cringed. “Everyone’s like ohh, it’s so convenient, and then everyone’s wondering why journalism’s dying out - you know what happened once an old paper of mine stopped selling print?”

“Grandpa-”

“Suddenly ohh, we just don’t know if that story’s gonna get clicks, ‘cause suuure, that’s the important thing to talk about, the fucking clicks, ‘cause what else are we here to-”

“Grandpa!” Noie nudged him away with a polite smile. “That’s really cool and important and all, but…” She glanced outside. “Um…”

He rolled his eyes, and got to his feet with an exaggerated sigh. “Fine, I can take a hint. Nobody wants to hear what Grandpa has to say, he should just shut up and go watch TV.”

“That’s not what I said!”

“You keep a close eye on Allie.” He pointed at her with the newspaper. “That’s what you agreed to, and maybe that’s not convenient or whatever, but it’s important, and you young people’ve gotta learn it’s not one or the other.”

“Young people? What are you even- I’m not gonna let her wander off, okay! Why do you think I’d ever do that?”

“You gotta learn, is all I’m saying.” David shuffled off, rubbing his back. “You gotta learn.”

“Alright, alright... sheesh.” Noie crossed her arms. “‘You young people’, oh, my stars. You think there was ever some old grump who said that to Grandpa back when he was a kid? Heh, I bet he was like ‘I wanna be just like you when I grow up!’”

There was no reply. She looked around, and saw Dipper wasn’t standing next to her… oh, right.

Tap, tap, tap.

Noie turned around, and saw her grandmother tapping on the glass. Allie smiled and waved at her when they made eye contact, and there was a flicker of a figure from behind a wall running down one side of the porch.

Oh, right.

She gulped, drew the blinds, and gingerly stepped outside.

The first thing she heard was, “Naomi!”

“Hi, uh, Granny. I-”

Arms came down and wrapped her in a hug. Allie squeezed her tight, tighter than she had in a long time. She tousled Noie’s hair and laughed; the sound was loud and loving, happy and carefree, and all the things Noie was going to say suddenly dried up on her tongue.

“It’s so good to see you!” Allie pulled back, and there was a shine in her smile. “Oh, wow, you’ve grown, haven’t you! Shot up like a seed, a seaweed!” She leaned forward. “You taller than Dipper yet?”

There was a lump in her throat. “I… um, I… I don’t... think so?”

“Aww, you should measure. Round your age, you’ll proberbe taller… pr-, properly? No, ‘probably’ ‘be’ taller.” She snorted to herself. “Words, Allie. What are we doing here?”

Noie just stared. It was strange, to see her grandmother like this: so animated, so responsive, so happy, so… herself.

Not because it was unfamiliar, because it wasn’t. Her hug, her laugh, her smile, and how it gave way to concern as she noticed the look on Noie’s face; this was all so, so familiar, and suddenly, she missed it so, so badly.

“Naomi? Sweetie?” Allie squeezed her shoulders. “What’s the matter?”

She just shook her head and hugged her Grandma. There were no words to explain it, and maybe Allie realised that, too; she just held Noie close, and rocked her a little, and for a moment, wrapped up warm and safe in her arms, everything really was okay.

Everything was as it should be.

Then Allie noticed someone. Noie felt her stiffen, and wiped her eyes before looking up questioningly.

She was frowning at the wall behind the porch… and the figure currently trying to flatten herself against it. The confusion slowly turned to recognition, and then:

“Is that… is that Lucy Ann? Oh, my stars!”

Wait, what?

Noie just had time to go, “Huh?” before she was almost pushed aside in a sudden dash over to the vampire. Lucy Ann stopped trying to hide; she stood up straight, and shot a glance at Noie before putting on her best smile and extending a hand.

“Uh, hi. Yeah, it’s me again.”

“Oh my stars, Lucy Ann!” Allie shook her hand vigorously, her words tumbling out of her mouth - almost nervously. “It’s- it’s an honour! I can believe I’m finely meaning you, I never fought I’d see- I… oh, where armyanners?” She gave one more firm shake, and her smile straightened into something more professional. “I’m Senator Aleksandra Argenta, from Southern Arizona. It really is a pleasure to meet you.”

With wide eyes, Noie watched Lucy Ann look from Allie’s dishevelled grey hair down to her faded blue nightgown and bare feet, then dip her head and say: “It’s a pleasure to meet you too, Senator. Big fan of your work.”

“You guys know each other?!”

Allie turned to Noie, and her smile brightened even further. “Oh, Naomi! You’re here!” She dashed up to her and gave her another huge hug. “It’s so good do see you! Howave you been? How’s school? Oh wow, you’ve gotten so much taller!”

“I-” Noie pointed at Lucy Ann. “I don’t… How do you…?”

Lucy Ann chuckled. “Oh, I might’ve made a couple names for myself over the years. I’m surprised you didn’t recognise me with a grandma this cool, though I’ll cut you some slack - I didn’t recognise Argenta either.” Her grin sharpened. “Guess I didn’t see the resemblance.”

“What?”

“Naomi, you have to meet this, this!” Allie took her hand and dragged her right up to the vampire. “This is Lushiann, she was instruments in taking down the Chancellor admini-uh-instrumentation acapple centaursa go! Living histree!”

“What?”

“There was a very pro-nat President you guys elected a few hundred years back.” Lucy Ann crossed her arms. “Me and a Mizar and some friends, we, uh, ‘took care’ of her.”

“Oh…” Naomi tried for a smile. “That’s nice. Good job?”

“Yeah, I’d say saving millions of preters from getting hunted down by the government was a pret-ty good job.”

“And we’re still fighting for pretrights.” Allie grumbled. “Laws from back then, they’re still on the books and peter-epresentation is still at history lows - you know itsstimated seventy percent of pre-transcendaged citisents are-egistered devote?”

“Seventeen percent registered to vote, yeah.” Lucy Ann shook her head. “Used to require everyone to have a US birth certificate, no exceptions, and, uh, that’s rather hard for folks whose birth certificate - if they had one - predates the United States.”

“I can’t believe that’s still alaw, I have a bill going through committeen right now to strike that one out.”

“Yeah, and it passed.”

“Oh, it passed?” Allie blinked, and then smiled. “Ohh, it did, didn’t it? That’s wonderful! Still a lot of work to do, though.”

Lucy Ann nodded. “You can say that again.”

“I’ll say it as many timesi need to.” She chuckled. “Some of my colleaks could use the reminder.”

The two of them laughed, and Noie just stared. The scene was too utterly bizzare for her to process; all she could think was what the fuck was going on?

There was a hand on her shoulder. Allie shot her a grin.

“Naomi, it’s so good to see you! Oh, my stars, you’ve come at such a good time!” She motioned to Lucy Ann. “This is Lucy Ann - you’verurdove Lucy Ann, right?”

Noie nodded weakly. “She took down a bad president?”

“A bad pro-nat president.” Lucy Ann added. “Don’t you forget that bit.”

“Sorry.”

“Lucy Ann was such an inspiritasion for me getting in-tolitics.” Allie sighed. “You know, my sister got bitten when she was for a teen, and it was such a rightmare getting anything done for her… I was like, Lucy Ann showed us hundreds of years ago this was unexpectable! Why’s she still gotta deal with this? Someone’s gotta changeings!” She laughed, and squeezed Noie’s shoulder. “And I know we got quite a promisting young lady here who-onts to... to do good change things too.”

Noie stiffened when Lucy Ann looked her way. “Uh…-”

“Oh, yeah? She’s gonna be a senator too?”

“I mean, I don’t know if I-”

“She’s certainly got it in her, if she wants to.” Allie beamed down at her. “You’re a talented young lady, Naomi. Don’t short your sell short, you’re going to do amazing things. You and Dipper, I can’t wait to see what you do.”

Noie didn’t know what to say to that. Lucy Ann pursed her lips.

“Well, you’re not wrong, she’d certainly fit right in as a politician.” She cleared her throat. “Uh, Senator?”

“Yes?”

“It’s been really, really great chatting with you… seriously, you have no idea how much I appreciate the company.” She gave a barking laugh, and picked at the blood under her fingernails. “But, uh, d’you think I could, y’know, speak with your granddaughter for a sec? One on one?”

“You want to do that?” Allie raised her eyebrows. “Oh, that sounds like exciting! What do you say, Nomi?”

Noie glanced at Lucy Ann, who was giving her a very hard look beneath that smile. She made a face.

“Uh, sure, I guess?”

“Naomi,” there was gentle laughter in her grandmother’s voice. “I think you can say that a littleit more politely.”

“...Yes? Thank you?”

Lucy Ann’s smirk was hard to look at. “Oh, don’t mention it. You know I’m here all day.”

“Really? What’s the occasion?”

“Don’t worry about it, Senator. I’ll, uh, tell you later.” Lucy Ann waved her away. “Give me a second with Noie, alright?”

“Oh, you want to talk with my granddaughter? That sounds exciting, Naomi, what do you-”

“I need to walk you back to Grandpa!” Noie tugged her towards the door. “Uh, I’ll be back in a second!”

Lucy Ann raised an eyebrow. “You’d better.”

“I-I will!” She opened the door for Allie. “Come on, Granny.”

“Where are we going?”

“To Grandpa! To, uh, David!” Slowly, Noie coaxed her into the house. “Come on!”

Allie frowned, but she let herself be led down the hall and into the living room. David gave her a wave when she sat Allie down next to him; he put his arm around his wife and looked back to the TV with a little grunt of thanks.

Noie was just walking away when she heard, “Can you ask Lucy Ann when she’s free?”

She spun around to stare at her, then at David. “Wh-what?”

“I’d love to see her again.” Allie smiled. “Maybe I can invite her over to our house. For tea.”

Noie just gaped at her grandmother, at a loss for words. After a moment, David waved her away.

“I got her, Naomi.” He squeezed Allie’s shoulder. “Good to have you back, I was… Uh, you wanna watch anything in particular? I’m just clicking through channels - so much of it’s a bunch of crap. Ugh.”

She backed up, staring at her grandmother for one more moment. Then she turned around and darted back through the halls and back outside.

Lucy Ann was waiting for her, feet right up against the open door and all pretense of a smile dropped from her face. She raised her eyebrows when she caught sight of Noie.

“Oh, you actually came back. Gotta admit, I was ninety percent sure you were just saying that.” She stepped to the side to let Noie through. “I was thinking of just screaming ‘DIPPER YOU’RE ALCOR’ through the door - y’know, since you left it open and all.”

She slid the door closed. “Um, please don’t do that.”

“Oh of course, it’d be very inconvenient for you, wouldn’t it.”

“No, that’s-! Look,” Noie threw her bag on the table and fished out the bloodpack. “I got this for you, so I’m not gonna let you die, alright? Everything’s going to be okay, so if you could just wait here a little longer, I’m working on a plan-”

“Of telling Dipper he’s Alcor?”

“No, but-”

“How long’s this plan gonna take?”

“Uh, I don’t think it’ll be too long-”

“Do you take constructive criticism?” She crossed her arms. “Or is it not quite out of the brainstorming stage?”

“Uh… look, I have it under-”

“No, you look, Noie!” Lucy Ann picked up the bloodpack with balled fists. “Look at this! This is insulting! I am not your pet! I am not going to stand in this fucking yard thirty feet from the only person who can actually help while you run around making stupid little plans that won’t fucking work!” She noticed Noie pressed up against the glass, and took a very deep breath. “Okay. Look, I am sorry this is so hard for you, but Dipper is Alcor, and an angel is trying to kill me, and I am sick and tired of sitting around in your yard doing nothing - I have a life to get back to!”

“I…” Noie gulped. “I’m sorry, I-”

“Don’t be sorry, just go get Alcor!” She stared Noie down. “Well?”

“Um, i-it’s just-”

“Ohhhh my starrrrs…” Lucy Ann dropped the bloodpack and kneaded her forehead. “How are you related to Senator Argenta? Just… how?”

“She’s… she’s my grandma?” Noie cringed when Lucy Ann started banging her head against a wall. “Uh… did you… did you actually know her?”

“Didn’t know her - I just met her this morning - but I knew of her, back when she was a senator.” She rested her head against the brick. “She did good work. And she was a real interesting lady to talk to, real passionate… I’m sorry she’s, y’know…”

“Alzheimer's.”

Lucy Ann sighed. “Yeah, I figured. That sucks, it really does.”

“It’s okay.”

“...You know, not everything has to be okay all the time.”

Noie didn’t know what to say to that. She stared at Lucy Ann, and after a moment, the vampire turned to look at her.

“Are you gonna go get Alcor for me?”

She said nothing, and watched Lucy Ann’s eyes go flat. The vampire looked down again, down at the floor, and suddenly it was hard to ignore how small she was. How young she seemed, in a dirty red shawl several sizes too big for her.

“Then I don’t know why you’re still standing there.”

That made Noie cringe. “Do, uh, do you want me-”

“To go? Yeah, I think that would be best.” She scuffed her feet against the porch. “I gotta lot of thinking to do: gotta figure out how to get to Alcor on my own and that’s… not easy. But hey, don’t let me stop you from living your life. Go inside.”

Noie stepped back. She stepped back again. She opened the door, and glanced over at Lucy Ann one more time-

“Seriously? Just go already!”

Then slid it shut and walked away with her arms clasped around her chest, cradling the deep, sinking feeling in her stomach.

This was fine. Or at least, it was going to be fine.

She just had to hold it all together for a few more days.

Just a few more days…

#transcendence au #Noie's Brother #Noie #toothwrites

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sweetdeathwrites · 5 years

Text

Tsuna Life (2/?)

Pairing: Highschool!Tsuna / Highschool!Reader

Summary: Just a day in the ordinary life of Tsuna… …as if his life was ordinary at all…

Warnings (overall): High school!AU, fluff, hhh….meet cute? , falling in love, Friends To Lovers troupe, flirting, second hand embarrassment, (potential) canon typical violence …slow updates

Word Count: 1,022

(posted on Luna/AO3. Original A/N below)

(Yo! So here's the next chapter! I had it done for a while but just never got around to posting it.... I'll post a lot more soon– summer is here! Sadly, I start my finals tomorrow...... I have 5 to finish before I can actually relax... and we start with history, my worst enemy.... math is the next day and i am 100% unprepared!! It's my weakness.... wish me luck, ok? And please leave a review! I'm extra motivated when I get reviews!~)

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No matter how easy, as long as I clear it, it’s fine Like a game, my life is not going as well as it should Tsuna was baffled. You kept popping up around the school grounds– maybe he just never noticed you… and he wasn’t saying that you were following him, but he was pretty sure you were following him. “Juudaime, is something wrong?” Gokudera’s worried face appeared in front of Tsuna and nearly gave the poor boy a heart attack. When his heart stopped its frantic beating— “Ah, no, Gokudera-kun, I was just thinking about someone…” “Someone?” Tsuna’s mind drifted off again to you. Who the hell were you? Certainly a weirdo; he knew your name, your freaky reputation, but not much else. You had been lurking around in the corners of his vision lately: waiting for him after school, loitering near the vending machines during breaks, always being near whenever he needs to borrow a pencil… “Who, Juudaime?” Gokudera asked, sincerely curious with whoever could capture his dear friend’s attention. Then you were there. Tsuna saw you from through the glass windows looking out into the hallway and he couldn’t believe his eyes. Your arms were full, your bag looked ready to burst and you were dropping papers and pens with every step you took. Truly, if Tsuna wasn’t Dame-Tsuna, he would have thought you were useless. ‘What the hell?’ Tsuna thought, tearing his gaze from you to look somewhere else, anywhere else. But it was too late. You had already made eye contact with him through the window and your mouth grew in a wide, impish smile. Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh- “Hey, Tsuna-kun!” You shouted, running into his classroom. Most of the students stared at you for a moment, some not even bothering to, content with reading manga or texting their friends. The teacher sitting in his desk at the front of the room shushed you harshly and went back to reading a book, savoring the little time he had before the next period. Soon, you plopped yourself to sit on Tsuna’s desk, chest just about level to his eyes. Tsuna jerked backwards and fell over in his chair, prompting Gokudera to gasp loudly and catch him on his way down. “You!” Tsuna shouted and pointed a shaking finger accusingly at you. “Me?” You asked. “Them?” Gokudera looked between the two of you before falling back into his default Right-Hand-Man-Body-Guard mode, and pushing himself between you and Tsuna. “Who are you?! Are you trying to hurt Juudaime?! You’ll have to get through me first!” You held your hands up, showing you meant no harm to the precious Tsuna. “Chill, man,” You said, smiling kindly at Gokudera. “I’m just here to hang out.” Tsuna slowly stood up and eyed the books spilling out of your canvas bag suspiciously. You took notice and a light blush grew up your neck and you sheepishly laughed. “Haha, well, I’m also transferring to your class–” “Why?!” “Are you excited, Tsuna-kun?” you teased him. “Actually, I really pissed off my teacher so I got moved here… Kawasaki-sensei is really scary when she’s mad!” Tsuna dragged his hands through his hair in agony and wailed. “But why are you the one that had to transfer?! Anyone else would have been better!” You laughed and kicked your feet playfully. “Silly Tsuna-kun! If I cause trouble, I’m gonna be the one that gets punished, of course!” Your laugh sounded like bells– it took Tsuna a moment to realize that it was the sound of bells ringing, the school bells, and that class was starting again. The teacher stood up with a sigh and took his place at the front of the class. “Alright, settle down, settle down,” he said as he beckoned you to the board. “We’ve got a new student– well, new to us, at least. Introduce yourself, please.” You stepped forward and beamed brightly to your new class and shouted your name out maybe just a little too enthusiastically, as a few students in the front jumped in their seats. “Hi there! I used to be in the class across the hall, but I made my teacher mad so I guess I’m here now! I like sweet things and singing, and sometimes you’ll see me working at the ice cream shop in the Namimori Mall! Come by and give me a heavy tip, alright?~” You tilted your head and batted your eyes, drawing a laugh from the class. In your peripheral vision, you could see your teacher sigh. “Another clown…” he muttered. “Alright, class, settle down!” He turned to you next. “Go ahead and take a seat.” Tsuna took a quick scan of the classroom and saw an open seat across the room. He sighed, and caught himself feeling relieved and a little disappointed at the same time. Confusion crossed Tsuna’s face. Why was he disappointed? As you walked to the open seat, the person sitting next to him shouted something that made his heart sink. “Hey! Why don’t we switch seats? You know Sawada, right?” You turned around with a maniacal grin on your face. “Do I!” You shouted back and practically vaulted over desks– obstacles, in your mind. Tsuna waved his hands to try to get you to sit down, somewhere, anywhere but next to him, as all hell broke loose with your reckless strategy. People were screaming as you came close to knocking their books off their desks, flinching away from your stretched legs. Tsuna was vaguely away of his teacher shouting something and his name. When you arrived at the desk next to him, the boy sitting in that seat laughed and high-fived you. Tsuna felt a headache building up in his temples and groaned, at the same time as his teacher. Looks like they were both having a rough time. Books smacked on the table loudly and a few pens clattered on the floor as you dropped them on the desk. You turned to Tsuna with bright eyes and a wide smile. “Hey there, desk buddy!” This was going to be a long year.

#sawada tsunayoshi #tsuna #reborn #khr #katekyo hitman reborn #fanfiction #fanfic #reborn fanfic #khr fanfic #tsuna x reader #tsuna/reader

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aquarianlights · 5 years

Text

Happy Personal Update Time!!

I know I promised to do this forever ago, but things got busy. So here I am!

Most of you know this is my personal blog, but it has become a lot less personal since pursing medical education. I’m still here, though, and I still love coming here to read all the asks I get and interact with all my followers and all that good stuff. What I really miss is being able to post text posts. They have always been my way of venting and letting go of inward pain, anger, frustration, etc... Text posts/ranting have always been super cathartic for me. But my life is great now and I’m happy to just jump back in to give a long overdue update every once in a while because I miss doing it and I know I still have longtime followers somewhere in that list of people. Haha. Exciting stuff is happening, though!! And I’m very excited to share it, as well.

SO.............this is gonna be long because THERE’S GREAT STUFF HAPPENING!! :D AND I WANT TO SHARE IT ALL!! I hope someone will read this coz man oh man have I come a long fucking way from the whiny little drug addicted suicidal little boy I used to be. Haha. :)

This fall semester is going to be just lovely. I’m going to have the opportunity to work with one of the clubs I’m joining to teach high schoolers how to properly do dissections. I’ll be taught how to properly clean equipment like microscopes and auger plates and such. And I’ll be working alongside a couple of my professors and other club members to mentor high schoolers in some cool biology stuff. :)

The other night, I finally got official international membership with Phi Theta Kappa and also got international membership with the Omega Nu Chapter. I’ll be receiving all that good proof stuff soon like certificates and such, but the reason I’m primarily excited about that is because that opens me up to a TON of scholarship opportunities. Both of those societies give out a fuckton of money every year for academic achievement and with me transferring schools, I’m hoping to be lucky enough to snag some of that.

One of my professors recommended me for a student council officer position and I found out recently that he spoke with another professor in the same department that had me as a student and she got on board with that, but I’m not entirely sure I want to go that route because while I was writing up my essay to submit to the current SGA explaining why they should choose me for one of the officer positions, I really didn’t feel all that passionate at all about it, so I’d much rather someone with a passion for the position have it, but it made me feel good that my professors have that kind of faith in me. I’m still debating on it, though.

Another professor of mine submitted my name for an internship position with a student partnership that eventually leads you to an invite-only online community where you can be set up with more internship opportunities and helps to make connections in your field and all sorts of stuff. The internship has a $200 stipend for the first semester that you do it and a $250 stipend for every following semester that you do it.

I was going to try it out with her this summer semester, but I had *NO* idea there was so much involved. By the time I had completed my 10 hours of training, I was in shock by the amount of work I was going to need to do to prepare for the role so I’ll actually be taking it on for the first time during Fall semester instead of summer, which is annoying because part of this internship requires you to make a short presentation in every one of the classes that the professor has that term for the students their class (and any other professor in the department who uses the software who may need you), record said lecture and put it up on canvas with the professor for anyone who missed the 1st day of class and for any online classes, be open for any questions after the presentation from both the students and the professor, hold at least 2 hours worth of office hours during the first week, and a *TON* of other stuff that happens prior to the semester before this and after this throughout the semester that would take forever to list. This is annoying that I am having to start in the fall because summer semester has less than HALF the students that fall has. There’s barely anyone there in the summer at all and summer classes are usually very laid back. The teachers are so chill in the summer and usually don’t care much, whereas the Fall semester is serious business and there are TONS of incoming freshman all confused about where they are going and everyone is lost and in a hurry and nervous and it is just total chaos literally everywhere on any campus you go to. So we really wanted to test this out during summer, but there’s just no way. The amount of representatives I have to meet and sit down with and hash out certain details with prior to even making this presentation is going to take me at least a couple weeks and summer semester starts next week. Lol. I only had like 3 weeks from the time my professor submitted my name. Was not nearly enough time.

It’s a very overwhelming internship and the work is... daunting. I mean, it is going to be a *LOT* of work and it is something I have never done before and it will be a style of leadership that I have never had placed on my shoulders before, but everyone has to take that first step at some point in their life. I hope I can do it. I’m going to try... I won’t say I’m not nervous about standing in front of a lecture hall full of students... but I’m probably not as nervous as some would be. I used to hold rally’s in my town square when I was younger to inform the public on the dangers of puppy mills, so I’m quite comfortable with public speaking, but I will say that it has been a good minute since I have done it and I have never stood up in front of a lecture room full of college students who are the same as I am and tried to pretend to know exactly what I’m doing. That’s a little scary to me. Ngl. Lol.

I’m going to be taking American Sign Language as a fluff class to boost my GPA, so I’m really excited about that because I’ve been wanting to learn it really badly. Just wanted to throw that in there haha. :)

That’s about it for the really BIG things for Fall Semester right now, not including like... the normal hard classes, graduating and switching uni’s soon and stuff. Which I’m super excited about!!

BUT!!...This summer is gonna be lit as well!

I got a volunteer position that I’m going to be in orientation for sometime soon (I think next week is what she said) where I’m going to a local shelter and all I’m doing all day is walking dogs, socializing dogs (basically playing with them and getting them comfortable around humans and other dogs so they’re more adoptable), bathing dogs, and basic training (sit, stay, etc...). It is basically my DREAM volunteer position!!

I just remembered reading an article at one point that said “most people don’t know that shelters really need people to just walk the dogs because regular volunteers usually don’t have the time”. And I remembered volunteering at the Humane Society when I was more able bodied than I am now and that was not something I could do now. It was much too physically taxing. Cleaning kennels, washing over 100 dog bowls in a massive sink that I had to stand on a stool to reach, washing tons of worn out dog blankets and toys, carrying heavy loads of laundry, carrying heavy water dishes out to the play yard, filling up buckets and carrying them, scrubbing the floors with a scrubber thing, etc etc etc... like, I could barely do it as able bodied as I was then. There was no slowing down because you had to rotate the dogs out and you only had a certain amount of time to clean the few bowls and toys/beds/towels we had and only a certain amount of time to power wash/spray down the kennels they were in. It was very very fast paced work and one large break in the middle of the day and I had to leave early and I know I could not do that now. Not in a million years.

Dog walking is something I can do with any size dog. Dog washing is still something I can do and something I have done professionally many times in the grooming industry. Dog socializing is wonderfully cathartic for me AND them. And I’m quite good with basic training, despite what it may seem with Echo...lmao (he just hasn’t been around consistency, which is a huge problem).

So I’m very very excited to get through my orientation and get started on this volunteer position! They were so kind and said that my physical disabilities would be no problem and they could work with me on my pace. I’m really looking forward to this and I’m hoping I can maybe fit it into my schedule when school starts up, even if I have to cut it down to just a couple hours, one day a week.

AND THEN........

In my PERSONAL life...

I’ve made a really cool circle of friends who isn’t intertwined with one of the most toxic people in my life that I really love and will most likely keep in my life forever because I truly believe they can unlearn the toxic behaviour and they’re one of my platonic soul mates. So I now have this really awesome circle of friends that I’m experiencing and learning all these new things about myself and about New Orleans and I keep getting closer with them.

((I may or may not post a rant I wrote up about that, coz it’s painful to talk about. And this is a happy post so it doesn’t go here!!))

I’m learning how to cook through one of those friends. I don’t have enough money to throw at a Hello Fresh subscription, but one of my next door neighbours in my apartment complex has turned into my really good friend and she has a Hello Fresh bi-weekly subscription and it usually is a 2-serving dish and we both live alone and we are both learning to cook for the first time, so we are doing it together. :D She invites me over to her apartment whenever she’s cooking and we’ll just muddle through learning how to cook together. It’s going to be a lot of fun honestly because I have SOOOOO much to learn!! :) Recently got a NutriBullet so I can make protein shakes, but I need to look at recipe’s coz mixing protein powder with just milk or water is awful. Ugh.

I’ve made up my own 30 day challenge for exercising and basically just becoming more healthy and getting my heart and muscles in better shape. June has 30 days so I figured what better way to do a 30 day challenge than on a month that has 30 days lol. Easy to keep track of, right? I made myself a chart and put it on my fridge and everything. Going to keep a log. I’m very excited to see the difference between day 1 and day 30. Going to take pictures for comparison. Idk if 30 days will make that big of a difference, honestly but... we’ll see??? Lol.

I guess this should go up in the school section, but I’m also working on quite a few scholarship entries so we’ll see how that goes!! I had NO idea so many easy essay scholarships were out there!! Keeping it to 1k words is the hard part. :( Eeeeeeeeeeep!!

Been studying for the MCAT’s and tryna find a medical math tutor. It’s gonna be hard, but... we’ll see. Hopefully the MCAT prep classes will help.

I’m in love with deep cleaning and organizing and my neighbour is gonna pay me to clean her apartment and then I’m going over to her mother’s house that she’s renting out (her mother passed away recently and she couldn’t handle staying in the house anymore) to help her Marie Kondo the place. We’re just gonna kind of... go at her own pace, slowly thank everything for doing its job, and get rid of everything that we can and deep clean everything while we are doing it. Probably just take it a day or a week at a time. I’ll be there with her to support her through the process...like if she needs to cry on someone when she sees a certain item or something. I’m excited to help with her journey to recovery and I’m so honoured to be given the chance to be someone’s rock. I love the bond me and my neighbour are developing. I just feel so honoured.

I’m going up to my parents house, then up to Virginia, then hopefully MA towards the end of the summer. Looking forward to the trip quite a bit. :)

HONESTLY...

I’m just so freakin’ excited. My life is going so wonderfully. Everything is so great. My apartment is wonderful, my relationship with my mom is on the mend because of how well in school I’m doing (you all know that’s all she cares about lol), I have wonderful friends and a great support group, my therapist and I click really well, I’m making opportunities happen and having opportunities open up to me in return, I’m meeting new people and seeing new things, I’m feeling physically healthier than ever (even though my chronic pain is worse than ever), I almost always wake up in a good mood, I’ve been getting a good amount of sleep almost every single night, school is good, connections in the professional world are growing...

The ONLY thing holding me back right now is money. I’m pretty much living paycheck to paycheck and it is killing me. The amount of things I *WANT* to do but don’t have the money for is just killing me. I’ve been wanting to take dance lessons, but I don’t have the money. Been wanting to sign up to a yoga studio and FINALLY found one IN MY AREA(!!) that had instructors trained in dealing with people with ehlers danlos syndrome (which is crazy coz lots of yoga instructors turn me away when they hear I have ehlers danlos type 3), but I can’t afford it.

I can barely pay my rent. :| I’m lucky I have EBT, otherwise I literally would not have had any food over the past 2 months. I would have had to choose between having a roof over my head or having food, so thank FUCK I have EBT coz I have a full cabinet and fridge right now. Fucking bless. Lololol.

I’m just so content. There’s a lot of stuff going wrong here and there and a lot of stuff stressing me out, but OVERALL... I couldn’t be happier.

Things have really taken a turn in my life and I have been waiting for them to all come crashing down for 2 years now and they still haven’t and that’s amazing to me.

And there’s my update lol. Hope you enjoyed the Killian Chronicles. 😂 😂 😂 Love and missed you all! 😘

((PS: This has not been proofread and most likely never will be. Free-flow-thought writing is my specialty lol.))

#personal #me.txt

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kpopficreview · 5 years

Text

Review #3

Luminous by Slytheryong

Fandom: NCT

Pairing: Markhyuck (Mark Lee/Lee Donghyuck)

Style: Chapter

Status: Ongoing (As of 12-1-18)

POV: Third person limited, shifted intermittently depending on the character of focus. Primarily limited to Mark.

Word Count: 13,707 (As of 12-1-18)

Summary: “There are a lot of things I would never like to hear in my lifetime, that Mark Lee is one of the greatest mages of our time is one of them.”

In which Mark Lee discovers he has magical abilities and is invited to a prestigious school of magic.

“You’re a wizard, Mark Lee.” “Shut up, Donghyuck.”

Plot: The story starts out by introducing us to our protagonist, the lovely Mark Lee, and the world that he lives in. It’s a world where magic exists, knights and mages are at odds with one another, and where creatures threaten to tear the world apart. (Said creatures have yet to be brought back up in the story so far, but I’m curious to see how they’ll be involved.)

Mark is the son of a family of knights, so he’s brought up his entire life expecting that he’s going to follow the family tradition and become a knight himself. His mother works in the capital selling silk, and Mark attended school there, so he spent a lot of time in the capital as a child.

Anyways, one day Mark was messing around with his friends Kang Daniel and Hwang Hyujin (which is a cute easter egg to multifandom stans if you read this! Jeongin is also brought up in the second chapter, revealed as Jisung’s roommate at the school of magic.) in the city. They’re causing problems, as teenage boys always tend to do. They wander into this magic emporium, which is funny because literally none of them appear to be magical by any means.

While in the emporium, Snuggyu’s Emporium, something catches Mark’s eye among all of the various things that could catch his attention in there: a staff. The shopkeeper catches him and calls him out on his interest in the item, telling Mark that it belonged to a mage by the name of Moon Taeil, the current headmaster of the School of Magic. He gives Mark a little speech that leaves the boy both dazed and inspired before Mark’s buds call him out of his bubble and usher him out of the shop.

It’s revealed that, as predicted, the boys did stir up some trouble while Mark was having his little education session with Sunggyu. Daniel snagged this little violet orb that they were told specifically not to touch or mess with. The shopkeeper isn’t a fool, so he obviously comes out after noticing and demands the boys give him the orb back. Hyunjin and Daniel decided to pull the bad kid card, refuse, and before Mark knows it, he’s running after them through the streets as the shopkeeper chases after them.

Then, there’s a wall of ice that’s summoned by the man, and the plot kicks off when Mark holds his hand out, full prepared to crash directly into it, shoots out coils of magic that burn the solid mass and turn it into water on the cobblestone.

Mark’s father watches the whole thing... And he’s not the only one. The commander of the knights tells him that he’s an arcane mage, the rarest type of mage in existence. It’s later revealed that there is only one arcane mage in every generation and that Mark Lee is the arcane mage of the current.

From there, Mark is taken from his home in a caravan that takes him away to the School of Magic. From there, he meets two of the professors from the school: Chittaphon/Ten, the only elven resident at the school, and Johnny, professor of shapeshifting. They fill him in on what exactly to expect, all about the categories of magic, and explain to him that the headmaster himself will be his personal mentor. From that moment on, Mark is thrown into a magical school where he knows nothing, nobody, and is thrown head first into advanced classes that will kill him if he isn’t careful.

Writing Evaluation: The author’s writing has the type of style to it that I personally enjoy reading; The writing itself was immersive, descriptions well timed, filled with imagery, and the movement of scenes was done in a way that wasn’t fatuous or inexperienced. The author has a very good understanding of how to keep a story moving but also how to slow things down to emphasize their points. There was lovely use of literary elements such as foreshadowing in the first chapter. There are a lot of questions that the reader starts to think about as they read, primarily about what exactly happened to the last arcane mage.

The author does a fantastic job of world-building, setting the scene for the readers, and really drawing them into this magical school. I felt while reading it as if I were at the school myself! Not nearly enough author possess the skill of sharing imagination, so I appreciate the fact that Slytheryong is able to do just that.

Favorites: Some of my favorite quirks from this fic include the following:

- Johnny’s relationship with Jisung ! Every time Johnny sees him and starts to go on and on about how much he loves him and believes in him, I can’t help but laugh to myself.

- Jisung is really well written by the author in general, so that’s another thing I want to acknowledge. They did an outstanding job of capturing his “cool” demeanor and exposing him for who he is with his friends

- I ADORE that Jaehyun is the ice professor ! As someone who loves ice magic regardless of the au or storyline, and someone who biases Jaehyun, this combination is perfect.

- Going off of the ice topic, I love that Jeno is the top ice mage at the school and that the author decided to give him his We Young hair haha

- I love that Stray Kids and Wanna One have been mentioned. I also really like that Sunggyu was brought into this! As a multifandom reader, it added a nice little crossover touch that I appreciated

- I love the way that the classes are organized as well. The different types of magic are all of interesting and I can’t wait to see how they relate to the rest of the characters in the chapters to come

- I’m REALLY excited to see what the author does with NOMIN.

Quotes: “Seriously, what was in those noodles Sicheng made him for dinner? Creepy sauce…” “Well, at least now the room is a little less emo.” Johnny adds with a grin that quickly diminishes when he glances at Taeyong and the entropic mage glares at him. The shapeshifter quickly adverts his gaze before whispering, “Not completely emo-less, but still- “

“What a cute little rat! That’s right, Jisung. Go off and be great!” ... The professor sighs then before telling Kun quietly, “A whole rat and he remembered the tail this time too. Ten won’t believe this. God, what a shapeshifting genius!” “Wow, a whole rat with a tail, as rats should have.” Kun mutters sarcastically, looking none too impressed, “He’s really the best shapeshifter of our time.”

“You’re kind of… basic.”

“Literally, he’s been diagnosed with insanity from the medical board. But he’s a great professor. I guess that outweighs the fact that he’s a complete psychopath.”

“Don’t let Jisung’s attempts to be cool fool you.” Jeongin tells Mark with a grin, “He throws a fit whenever they run out of pancakes in the dining hall.”

Rating + Rec? Would I recommend this to someone? Yes, I most certainly would recommend this to anyone that enjoys magical stories and can appreciate world building. I also would reccomend reading this if you’re multifandom just so that you can understand who the author is referencing by mentioning certain side characters, but you obviously don’t have to stan Stray Kids or Wanna One to appreciate the fic.

Plot/Plot Creativity: 10/10 ! I thoroughly enjoy the plot of this fic so far and I can’t wait to see how it progresses. I will most likely make an update of this review once the entire fic is completed and/or reviews for the individual chapters as they’re updated because I enjoy the storyline so much.

Writing: 9/10. I’m only taking a point off for a few verb tense issues, a mispelling or two, and a grammatic error I found

Enjoyment: 10/10

Overall: 9.75/10

I really enjoyed the mess that was this fic and I scored it so highly because it was something so unique and so fabulously executed that I went back and re-read it twice just to make sure I retained it all.

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stupid-jeans · 6 years

Text

fight just a little ch7 (Hannah Rivera/Cassie Conner)

Over on AO3

Notes/Summary: The aftermath of Iran is a little much for Hannah. Thankfully, she knows just who to call.

Thanks for hanging out with us a bit while we frolicked off doing other things haha. There are still two more chapters of this written and not yet posted (not including this one) but we've taken a short break from writing it so updates have slowed down too.

A really big bulk of this chapter is NSFW. There are also a lot of feelings.

Thanks as always to @undercoverwatermoon for the beta, and to the rest of thefab5 ( @chibisere23 @kyrieanne ) for existing and being wonderful.

The biggest thanks, of course, to @icarryyourheart16, for embarking on this and any other crazy project with me, and for being my brain twin, and and and.

It’s less than 48 hours between waking up in Cassie’s arms and listening to Jaz get taken. Hannah’s settled into her job now, she’s settled into her relationship with Cassie, but this she’s not prepared for.

Unlike the team being in Mongolia, Hannah doesn’t have five minutes to take a breath. She barely eats, barely leaves her desk. It’s torture. Nothing like what she imagines Jaz is going through, but, God, it fucks with her head.

When Patricia asks her what she thinks their chances are, she has to be honest--they don’t have one. Jaz is gone. And logistically, it’s not worth risking the rest of the team for a zero percent chance. But being the one to say that makes Hannah feel like almost as much of a monster as Jariff.

Watching the team fight tooth and nail, claw their way from zero percent to something at least in the double digits, is something. Hannah’s been awed by Dalton’s team before. But this is something else entirely.

By the time the team crosses safely into Turkey, it's been almost three days since Hannah’s left the building.

She makes it to the car at least before calling Cassie, who’s left her a handful of messages.

Cassie begins worrying after the first day of no contact from Hannah. It’s not uncommon for either of them to work long hours, but the texts and voicemail she sent are left unanswered.

By the second day, Cassie is so tense she nearly snaps at Jeremy when he offers her a bagel from the cart downstairs. He raises an eyebrow, but takes it in stride, and comes back from lunch to tell her that gossip from those that intermingle with the DIA is minimal, a clear sign that the agency is working on something highly classified. It eases Cassie’s mind slightly, but the worry still gnaws at her stomach. She knows Hannah forgets to eat when work gets intense, and she wonders if she’s getting any rest.

A small ugly voice Cassie is ashamed of tells her Hannah is pulling away, but she brushes it aside almost immediately. This is not that.

It’s day three and Cassie’s left two more voicemails, each of them light and encouraging, because she knows the last thing Hannah needs is to feel guilty. She even went as far as to call Noah, which might have been crossing a bit of a line, but worry has her acting irrationally. The fact that he hasn’t replied tells her whatever is going down at the DIA is most likely not good.

Cassie is worrying her lip reading over her report when her cell phone rings. She’s so on edge she practically dives across her desk to reach it, startling Jeremy, who knocks his mug of herbal tea over onto his desk and lap.

“Jesus Christ Cassie, can you tone it down a notch?” he says as he rights his cup, but his expression is one of concern as he watches her.

Cassie takes a breath to wash all evidence of tension from her voice, and answers.

“Hey baby.”

As soon as Hannah hears Cassie’s voice, she breaks. The stress, the horror, the helplessness, the memories all come cascading down on her at once and suddenly, Hannah can't stop sobbing. She can't speak or move or offer Cassie any sort of explanation. It's been a long, long time since she's cried, let alone with an audience, but Cassie is safe. Cassie is her safe. And she's never been more sure of that than she is right now.

Cassie’s heart lodges in her throat, and she’s halfway to the elevator, murmuring soothing words to Hannah before she stops, realizing she forgot her keys. Cursing, she spins around, nearly bowling over Jeremy who holds her keys and purse.

He lets out a grunt as she launches into his arms, giving him a grateful hug before she rushes into the elevator. She keeps her voice steady for Hannah’s sake, but her heart breaks with each sob.

“Hannah, love, I’m coming to get you okay, can you tell me where you are?”

Hannah manages something that is at least partially distinguishable as ‘work’, focusing on Cassie's voice, on the idea that she's safe and loved and that, no matter how painful the memories are, they're in the past and can't hurt her. Cassie is coming to get her and everything’s going to be okay. She’ll fall asleep wrapped in Cassie's arms, listening to her heartbeat, and that's all that matters.

Slowly, the tears stop and she manages to catch her breath, but if she was exhausted before, she's totally drained now and she can barely move, let alone drive. So she listens to Cassie instead, sniffling and wiping occasionally at her tear-stained cheeks until Cassie’s car pulls up beside hers. Hannah's never been so grateful for anything in her life.

Cassie’s heart kicks up slightly as she spots Hannah in her car, but by the time she gets out and opens Hannah’s door she’s calm and her voice is low.

“Hey baby, let’s go home okay.” Cassie murmurs, wiping at the tears on Hannah’s cheeks and kissing her softly on the forehead.

She reaches into the car and slides her arms around Hannah to just hold her for a moment.

“I’ve got you.”

Hannah slumps into Cassie, clinging to her, though it takes a good deal of effort to make her limbs work.

“You're here,” she whispers, almost delirious. “I'm sorry I didn't call sooner…”

“Shh…” Cassie soothes, swallowing hard at how easily Hannah leans into her, and strokes soothingly down her back. “It doesn’t matter.”

She leans over to take Hannah’s keys out of the ignition and leads Hannah to her own car, where she settles her before jogging back to grab Hannah’s purse. Cassie holds Hannah’s hand as she pulls out of the parking lot, stroking her thumb lightly over her fingers. Her phone rings and she almost dismisses it, but it’s her boss and she winces as she answers, pulling over.

“Miss Conner, Jeremy informed me you had a personal emergency. I wanted to check in.”

Cassie glances at Hannah.

“Yes, sir. I will need to take the rest of the day.”

There’s a slight pause on the other line.

“Very well, next time I would appreciate some notice, but take the time you need. I can extend the deadline on your reports.”

“No need sir, I already finished them.” Using work to distract herself meant Cassie was at least two weeks ahead of her deadlines.

“Thank you for your commitment Miss Conner. Best wishes to you.”

Cassie thanks him and pulls onto the road again.

They make it to her apartment in decent time, and she takes Hannah directly to her bedroom where she guides her to the bed. She looks beyond exhausted.

“Don't leave,” Hannah mumbles, reaching out for Cassie despite already being half-asleep. She's so far gone, she already knows she won't remember this later. Typically, that would make her nervous, but she trusts Cassie. The knowledge settles her and Hannah falls asleep, safely tucked into Cassie’s bed, knowing things will feel a little less overwhelming when she wakes up. This time, she doesn't have to do it alone.

Cassie holds Hannah until she’s asleep, and then sits with her for a moment longer, cheek pressed to her hair. Her fingers stroke absently down her arm and she pulls the throw more securely over Hannah’s shoulders, kissing her gently on the cheek before sliding off the bed to grab her laptop.

She works silently beside her, keeping watch in case she wakes up.

Hannah sleeps until the winter sun is halfway below the horizon. She blinks her eyes open blearily to find Cassie beside her and some of her confusion vanishes.

“Hi,” she whispers, her voice raspy. Her mouth is dry and she's in desperate need of food and a shower, but it can wait a minute. She reaches out to trace her fingers along Cassie’s thigh.

Cassie glances at Hannah and hits send on the food order she’d placed to be delivered as soon as possible after Hannah woke. No need to make things worse by attempting to cook for her.

She covers Hannah’s hand with her own and leans down to kiss her gently.

“Hey baby, how are you feeling?”

“Like I got hit by a truck,” Hannah answers honestly, stretching out gingerly with a groan. “Thank you for coming. I don't know what I would've done.”

Sitting up, Hannah rubs her hands over her face, still groggy.

“Jaz was…” She pauses and shakes her head. “You know what? After a shower and some food. Was work mad you left?”

Cassie reaches back to grab the water bottle she’d kept on her end table for Hannah and hands it to her.

She pushes her laptop to the side and embraces Hannah, pressing a kiss to her shoulder.

“Nah, I’m already ahead of deadline, the boss is easy enough to keep happy.” She releases Hannah and cups her cheek.

“You’re more important than work, anyway,” she says stroking away the strands of hair sticking to Hannah’s forehead.

“Are you going soft on me, Conner?” Hannah teases affectionately, leaning into Cassie’s touch with a smile. The way Cassie looks at her is different, she realizes, and Hannah has no idea when that happened. Maybe around the same time that Hannah reached the conclusion that seeking comfort for the shadows of her past didn’t make her weak--that letting someone in to this part of herself made her stronger.

Cassie laughs, because it dawns on her that’s exactly what’s happened, and she’s surprised that somehow it makes her feel steadier than she’s ever felt.

“That’s classified,” she says with grin, and she presses a kiss to Hannah’s forehead again before sliding off the bed and handing her a pair of pajamas she’s noticed Hannah favors.

“Why don’t you take a shower. I’ve got food on the way, and ice cream in my fridge,” Cassie says, and she stands in the doorway smiling gently at Hannah. “I love you.”

Hannah feels a little like swooning. She’s suddenly entirely overwhelmed with affection for this amazing woman who has chosen to love her.

“Have I told you lately that you’re perfect?” she asks, getting to her feet, holding the pajamas to her chest. “Because you are. I love you, too, Cassie.”

She commits the sight to memory. It’s simple enough, just Cassie standing in the doorway, looking back at her, but Hannah thinks, if she somehow ended up bleeding out on the side of the road again tomorrow, this is the memory she’d hold onto: the one of Cassie loving her.

Before her emotions can get the better of her, Hannah ducks into the bathroom and focuses on making herself marginally more human. If not for her stomach demanding food (so much so that her hands are shaking when she reaches for the shampoo), Hannah might’ve lingered under the hot spray. But she wants to eat and she wants to be near Cassie, and both of those things mean her shower is fast.

When she finds Cassie in the living room, the food has arrived and Hannah stuffs three garlic knots in her mouth before saying a word.

Cassie loads more food into Hannah’s plate and scoots her chair closer so her thigh presses against Hannah’s. The physical closeness centers her, and she sits silently beside her, tracing absent circles against Hannah’s hip with her thumb.

The silence is comforting, and Cassie expects after three days without so much as a break, Hannah must be mentally exhausted.

Eating helps and Hannah’s mind feels a little clearer. She tips her head against Cassie’s shoulder, lightly kissing her neck between bites.

“Do you want me to talk about it?” she asks finally, not because it’s been gnawing at her, but because now she feels like she can. “Because I know...I mean, we don’t have to. I have a therapist. I pay her for something.”

“No, baby. I want to listen, but I didn’t want to push you,” Cassie explains, realizing her patience hadn’t exactly granted Hannah the space to speak.

“What happened? I was so worried for you.”

Hannah draws a breath and sips her water, searching for the right words before realizing there is no such thing.

“Jaz was captured. In Iran. She was taken by Special Forces after killing a terrorist. I didn't think she was coming back. None of us did.” Automatically, Hannah strokes the scars on her neck, remembering how they’d burned. “They tortured her and all I could think about was Sonora and how close I came to not coming home.”

Cassie watches as Hannah touches the marred skin and hugs her a little closer. She aches for Hannah, because she’s all too familiar with past horrors springing up unexpectedly.

“God baby that’s terrible. I’m so sorry you had to face that,” Cassie murmurs. “How are you feeling now?”

“There was nothing I could do...then or now. And I hate that. Most days, I feel...superhuman. Like what we’re doing makes us unstoppable, you know?” Hannah asks. “Today worked out, but sometimes it doesn’t and...that’s just a lot scarier than it used to be.”

Now you have something to lose, the voice in her head provides helpfully, and all the reasons why Thea walked away suddenly make so much more sense.

Cassie understands that, and the oily sense of panic that comes with it. “I know,” she murmurs, stroking Hannah’s back.

“We controlled our entire world, or thought we did,” she says, “knowing that you can’t is hard to accept.” Although she speaks it to Hannah, Cassie realizes maybe it’s something she needed to hear as well.

“You’re incredible,” Cassie says, brushing a kiss over Hannah’s cheek, “because you know, and you get up and do it anyway.”

Hannah relaxes at that. The ache in her chest is an old one, a memory more than anything else, and it’ll fade.

“I couldn't imagine doing anything else,” she admits. “We aren't really made for civilian life, you know? But I like this version, the one where I get to come home to you.”

Cassie thinks of the application sitting in her file at work, and a deadline that is two days away. She thinks of how she misses Hannah if work keeps them apart for more than a few days, and how fieldwork would keep her away for weeks, if not months.

“Coming home to you is the best part of my day,” Cassie murmurs as she runs her fingers absently through Hannah’s drying hair.

“I am pretty amazing,” Hannah teases, picking up another piece of pizza and taking a bite without moving. “How’re you doing? Work going okay?” It’s only been a few days but it feels like so much longer.

“Glad you know it,” she replies with quick grin.

“Work is work,” Cassie shrugs. “It’s easy enough to get through the day. Our field unit goes dark for weeks at a time, so it’s a lot of paperwork, but I get through it quickly enough.” She pauses with a frown.

“I feel like I’m just… waiting. I don’t know what for,” she admits.

“You talk to the shrink again?” Hannah wonders. “Adjusting to desk life is tough. It takes a little while to get used to.”

She wonders, suddenly, if maybe Cassie doesn’t want to get used to it, if she’s just biding her time. And Hannah remembers every conversation she’s had with her own therapist about the importance of communication and not just assuming people are on the same page, but this feels a lot different than talking about whether or not they were going to sleep together.

“Hmm, no, I rescheduled.” Cassie says. “We had an unexpected contact from the field team and the whole office was scrambling.” It’s a bit of an excuse, and guilt niggles at her.

“I’ll get used to it,” Cassie says with a smile, trying to shake off the strange mood that grips her.

Hannah wants to call Cassie out, but there’s a fear there, now. If she pushes and Cassie snaps and tells her she’s still planning on going back to the field, that this is all just temporary, Hannah’s pretty sure it’ll break her. Especially tonight.

“Yeah,” she says instead, sitting up under the guise of reaching for her drink. “You will.”

The room feels cold now, and Hannah shivers without Cassie’s warmth.

Cassie senses the shift immediately. Anger at herself flares and mingles with the fear that she’s messing things up, and that curls in with the guilt, because she’s supposed to be here for Hannah, and instead she’s dredging up some unwanted thing.

She pushes her mostly untouched food away, and almost leans over to give Hannah a peck, but guilt has her pausing and drawing away.

“I’m gonna jump in the shower,” she says.

“Okay,” Hannah replies, her mind already shifting into work mode, into pushing away her emotions to be dealt with later and erecting a wall of numbness instead. She gets up before Cassie does and starts to gather the food to clean up. Part of her wants to go home, but there’s a larger part of her that reminds her of her own promise not to let Cassie push her away. “Hey.” She pauses in the kitchen doorway, glancing at Cassie over her shoulder. “I love you.” The words take work, now, but she thinks that’s kind of the point. There’s fear gnawing at her, but pushing Cassie away won’t magically make that better.

“I love you too,” Cassie replies, and she has to turn quickly because tears form in her eyes, and she doesn’t know why her damn mind is such a mess. There’s a strange sense of relief that comes with Hannah’s words, and Cassie realizes with a sinking feeling that without meaning to, a part of her has been waiting for things to fall apart, like being happy just isn’t in the cards for her.

Cassie fights the urge panic, to throw her guard up, because as much as she wants to run from this thing that scares her, she wants to hold on more.

The water is almost too hot, but Cassie stands under the spray anyway, letting the slight pain pull away some of the emotional turmoil.

Hannah straightens up, and it helps to clear her mind a bit. She manages to reel herself back in, to remind herself that there are more pieces at play here than she’s considering. Besides, they haven’t even talked about anything. They’ll cross that bridge when they get to it. In the meantime, Cassie had just come to rescue her and then spent the last day taking care of her, and that’s real and true and tangible. It’s enough.

Making a plate up for Cassie, because she hadn’t eaten more than a few bites, Hannah takes it to the bedroom and settles in to wait for Cassie to emerge from the shower. It’s her turn to do a little damage control for once.

Cassie’s head is somewhat clearer when she steps out of the shower, and she stands in the steamy room for a second to collect herself. She owes Hannah honesty, and as much of her trust as she’s capable of giving. The thought unsettles her, because she’s afraid, but she wants to have faith in Hannah, in them.

Cassie is determined to fix this latest snag, and she strides purposely out of the bathroom, only to falter when she sees Hannah on her bed. Her plan to take charge vanishes as she stares at Hannah, and she’s filled with both a fierce love, and the fear that she’s going to do something wrong, ruin this somehow.

“Come here, beautiful,” Hannah murmurs, watching Cassie’s entire posture shift. “You’ve done such a good job taking care of me. You’re incredible and I love you so much. We...have some work to do, still. And that’s honestly kind of terrifying. But it’s a lot easier if we do it together, hm?”

Cassie closes her eyes on a sigh and walks into Hannah’s arms, pressing her face into Hannah’s shoulder as she wraps her arms tightly around her. Having someone fight for her is new, and it completely undoes her.

“I’m sorry. You just went through something so rough, and I made it worse.”

“Hey, no. You didn’t. You’re not responsible for what’s going on in my head, okay?” Hannah murmurs, holding Cassie close and stroking her hair. “The only way we know what’s going on for sure is to talk about it. So we will. But not tonight, hm? Too important to do that when we’re both a little rattled. But I love you, Cassie, and I’m not going anywhere.”

Cassie weaves those words into her memory.

“I don’t deserve you,” Cassie says, and lifts her head from Hannah’s shoulder to look at her. “I know I can be a damn mess sometimes, but I trust you, more than anyone. You’re the only person who’s stayed and-” she pauses, because that particular wound is too much for tonight, “You matter so much, I just want you to know, for when I get stupid.”

Hannah lets go of Cassie so she can cradle her face instead, holding her steady to stop her from looking away.

“You deserve to be happy. Period. You deserve someone who stays, someone who fights for you. The mess...happens. That’s life. We both know I’m kind of an expert at messes. So we’ll both fuck up. But we won’t run away. Deal?”

“Deal,” Cassie murmurs, and her smile softens as doubt fades away. She leans in to kiss Hannah, slow and soft, before drawing back.

“You need to eat,” Hannah coaxes, dropping her hands to squeeze lightly at Cassie’s wrists. “And then all I want is to curl up right here with you and kiss you for a while. Okay?”

“Mmmm, dream girl,” Cassie says, and she nudges Hannah further onto the bed so she can lean back on the headboard and nibble on the food Hannah brought her. It makes her feel both vulnerable, and safe, to be cared for, and she leans her head on Hannah’s shoulder.

Cassie takes a while to filter through the worry in her head before she speaks.

“When you spoke to the shrink, did you tell him everything? The dreams, stuff that could make it seem like you might not be fit for the job?”

Hannah nuzzles Cassie’s hair, pressing a kiss to the top of her head, enjoying the closeness again.

“Everything is a lot,” she says. “It took a long time for me to build a good relationship with my therapist. The department shrink? I...was honest with him. If there were things I didn’t want to talk about, I told him that. Sometimes he pushed, sometimes he let it go. But it’s like I told you: he’s not looking for you to be okay. None of us are really okay, you know? I don’t think you can kill people, or watch them die, and be okay. I don’t think you can willingly put yourself in harm’s way and go home without scars. He’s just...looking to make sure you know that, that you’re honest about not being okay.”

Cassie lets that settle in as she curls against Hannah, wrapping her arms loosely around her.

“I convinced myself for so long that I was immune to all of that,” Cassie says. “I’d rather look down the barrel of a gun than admit I’m not okay,” she adds with a laugh.

“I think that might be scarier than buying a couch”.

“It’s way scarier,” Hannah agrees, resting her forehead against Cassie’s as her thumb sweeps over her hip. “But you’re brave and strong and it gets easier with practice, I promise. Just remember, he’s not trying to trick you. This isn’t some test.”

Cassie lets out a breath and shakes her head. “Sometimes I think you may actually be able to read my mind,” she says, leaning up to kiss Hannah’s jaw.

Hannah’s eyes flutter shut and she sighs softly, slipping her fingers tenderly into Cassie’s hair. “Mmm, no mind reading. I’m just a trained spy, remember? And, you know, I’ve been there.”

Cassie shifts to crawl into Hannah’s lap, stroking her fingers softly down the side of Hannah’s neck before kissing her again.

“You have,” she says, sitting back to look at her.

Hannah’s breath goes a little unsteady at Cassie’s touch, but it's from warmth and not from fear.

“So I see you, baby,” she whispers, holding Cassie’s gaze, smoothing her hands over the other girl’s hips, just to touch her.

Cassie smiles tenderly at Hannah and slides off her lap to pillow her head on her shoulder. Partly to hide the moisture in her eyes, and partly to be closer to Hannah. To be known, and to be loved anyway is something new for her.

“And don’t worry,” Hannah murmurs, shifting to wrap her arms around Cassie. “I won’t tell anyone the most badass agent the Agency has is actually a giant softie.” She trails kisses along Cassie’s cheek, slow and gentle. “Kinda like keeping this particular secret to myself.”

Cassie laughs and tilts her head up to kiss Hannah.

“You better keep my secrets Rivera,” she murmurs. Her hands come up to cradle Hannah’s face, and she leans into her, embracing the softness of Hannah against her.

“Every single one of them,” Hannah vows, leaning into Cassie’s touch, kissing her again, sweet and lingering as her fingers fan over Cassie’s jaw and then trail almost reverently down her neck.

Cassie’s eyes flutter closed as Hannah’s touch sends pleasure shivering over her skin.

“Come here,” she murmurs, tugging Hannah down so they’re cuddled under the covers, her legs intertwining with Hannah’s as she presses a gentle kiss to her temple.

“I’m so glad I have you.”

“Says the woman who just rescued me from the parking garage in the middle of a breakdown,” Hannah laughs softly, her fingers curling under the hem of Cassie's shirt, automatically seeking her warmth. “God, I love touching you.”

Cassie wiggles closer to Hannah so she can nibble at her neck.

“I have to agree,” she says, sliding her hands under Hannah’s shirt to smooth over her belly and span over her waist. “Your skin is like silk,” she buries her face in Hannah’s neck “and you always manage to smell fucking amazing.”

“Well, right now I smell like you, so I'll agree with that,” Hannah murmurs distractedly, shivering under the warmth of Cassie’s hands. Her own slip higher, fingertips tracing up Cassie’s spine as her head tips in encouragement.

Cassie hums against Hannah’s skin as she feels the other woman shiver against her. She loves the way Hannah responds to her touch, shivers and sighs at the lightest touch, and she smooths her hands firmly against her skin, tracing the tip of her tongue along her neck. Knowing she can make Hannah respond like that fuels her own need.

“Cassie,” Hannah breathes, arching a little, heat skittering under her skin to settle low in her stomach. It's such a simple thing, but knowing now what Cassie feels like, how she sounds, makes everything feel like so much more. Her hands glide higher, nails dragging carefully over the contours of Cassie’s shoulders, mapping the now-familiar territory. “Baby, I love your mouth.”

Cassie feathers her fingers over Hannah’s neck as she licks and nibbles at the skin there. The press of Hannah’s body against her heats her own skin, and she pulls Hannah’s hips closer to slot against her own.

A soft, needy sound escapes Hannah’s throat and she can't resist the impulse to shift against Cassie. Her hands dip, following the slope of Cassie’s back to tease at the base of her spine, slipping just barely under the waistband of her sweats.

“I love how you sound, just like this,” Cassie murmurs, as her hand slips under Hannah’s shirt to smooth her thumb along Hannah’s ribs just under her breast. She presses open mouthed kisses to the spot on Hannah’s neck that she knows always elicits a response.

Hannah feels herself flush even as she arches into Cassie, another less quiet moan spilling past her lips. One hand abandons Cassie's waist to cradle her head instead, fingers twining through Cassie’s hair.

“God.” She moves again, angling against Cassie’s hip, need pooling fast and low.

Cassie’s hands are slightly rougher as Hannah’s moans send heat crackling over her skin. She palms her breast, pressing a thumb over the peaked nipple as she bites lightly at Hannah’s pulse point, catching the skin gently between her teeth, careful not to leave a mark.

“Baby,” she breathes, yanking Hannah’s thigh up over her hip and arching into the heat there.

It's not until Hannah slides her hand over Cassie’s ass to tug her hungrily closer that she realizes she's already shaking. She tugs just a little at Cassie’s hair, shifting restlessly, the friction and Cassie’s teasing drawing an almost constant stream of breathless, desperate sounds from her lips.

“Please,” she gasps, not even sure what it is she's begging for. She just wants more--of this, of Cassie.

Cassie groans as Hannah moves desperately against her, the heat and want steals her breath, and she flips them over, desperate with need. Her knee slides between Hannah’s legs and she grinds against her as her mouth drops to her neck and her hands move to pin Hannah’s wrists to the mattress.

“Fuck, baby,” she moans, bending down to lick over her collarbone.

The sudden shift is exactly what Hannah needs, even as she struggles against Cassie’s hold, testing. She arches against the welcome pressure of Cassie against her, and the shuddering burst of pleasure it sends through her is instant. Her head drops back as her eyes close, and Hannah can barely find enough air to make a sound. Cassie hasn't even touched her and she's already on edge. Were it anyone but Cassie, Hannah might've been a little embarrassed, but right now, she doesn't particularly care.

“No,” Cassie says simply, giving Hannah’s wrists a squeeze before her teeth scrape lightly over the thin skin across Hannah’s collarbone. She moves to her neck again, nibbling at the spot under Hannah’s ear.

“I want to undo you, just like this,” she whispers against her skin, and her breath hitches as she moves against Hannah, desperate for more of her.

“Jesus, Cassie,” Hannah moans. She rocks more insistently against the other woman's thigh, the sound of Cassie's breathing, the feel of her, dragging her to the edge, holding her there for what feels like an agonizing eternity. “God, baby, tell me please…” She doesn't make a habit of begging for permission, but there's something about Cassie in control like this.

Cassie feels the telltale tingles across her skin as Hannah moves against her, desperate and begging. Cassie’s breathless in her own pleasure, but she brushes her lips against Hannah’s neck and leans in to whisper in her ear.

“I want you to come for me baby.”

The pleasure coiled in Hannah’s stomach snaps and she breaks, bowing under the weight of Cassie, breathing her name. Heat courses through her in waves, leaving her boneless and shivering as she struggles to catch her breath. “Fuck, baby…”

Cassie throws her head back and moves against Hannah, her own release not far behind. The pressure builds and releases in a wave of hot pleasure that has her shuddering and moaning before she collapses weakly beside Hannah.

“Jesus.” she manages, pressing her lips clumsily to Hannah’s temple.

“Mmmm, now I need another shower,” Hannah says, giggling as she reaches for Cassie’s hand, lacing their fingers together. “I like you bossy.”

Cassie brings their joined hands to her mouth and brushes her lips across the top of Hannah’s hands.

“Hmmm, you do huh? I can keep being bossy.” Cassie murmurs playfully, using her free hand to stroke Hannah’s hair gently back from her forehead.

“Since we both need a shower and all…” Cassie tugs Hannah up.

“Don’t get too excited. I seem to recall you liking me bossy, too,” Hannah teases, letting Cassie lead her into the bathroom. She’s already dropped her shirt on the floor before she thinks about how easy it was to do it. Cassie’s standing right there, the light is on, and now Hannah’s scars are on full display. The panic and the dread don’t come, the disgust doesn’t come, either. Instead, there’s only relief and maybe a little pride. It leaves her standing there, a little dumbfounded.

“Oh, you mean when you nearly killed me? Yeah I vaguely recall that being spectacular,” Cassie retorts with a grin. She notes Hannah’s slight pause and understands immediately. Her smile gentles as she steps back to her to take both her hands.

“You’re so damn beautiful it takes my breath away,” she murmurs.

“You’re something else, you know,” Hannah muses, tracing Cassie’s cheek tenderly. “How you make me feel is...God, I don’t even know. Amazing? Miraculous?” She’s still not sure what to do with all of it, how to make space for this part of herself, but she’s trying.

Cassie flushes with pleasure and leans into Hannah’s touch. “I love you baby. I know people aren’t supposed to save people, but I think you saved me just a little bit,” she confesses before stepping back to turn the knob on the shower.

“I think there’s been some mutual saving going on.” Hannah watches Cassie a minute before shimmying out of her pants, too, and then the reality of Cassie naked and wet against her in the shower catches up to her and Hannah has to remind herself to breathe. She shivers in the cold air and reaches for Cassie’s shirt again. “Someone’s wearing way too many clothes…”

Enjoying her, Cassie blinks innocently and raises her hands above her head.

“Oh no, if only there was something we could do about that,” she says, grinning, as her eyes rove hungrily over Hannah.

“Obedient, yet sassy,” Hannah observes with a playfully arched brow. “See, now I don’t know which one I like better...Good thing I don’t have to choose.” She tugs Cassie’s shirt over her head and wastes no time in drawing Cassie close, savoring the soft heat of skin on skin. “That’s better…”

Cassie chuckles and slips out of her sweatpants, making sure to wiggle suggestively against Hannah in the process.

“You’re right, much better.” She kisses Hannah, fierce and needy, before drawing back.

“You're a tease, Conner,” Hannah purrs, nudging Cassie toward the now-steaming shower. “That's not a complaint, to clarify.”

Cassie pulls Hannah along with her as she steps into the spray. The water slicks over both of them, and Cassie skims her hands over Hannah’s hips.

“Hmmm, I like you wet and slippery,” Cassie says, and then leans in, her voice low and purposefully playful. “I mean that both ways.”

For all of the teasing, Hannah's not quite ready for the feel of Cassie against her like this. Whatever saucy response she might've found a minute ago is promptly lost to the way Cassie’s skin slides against hers, frictionless and hot. An undignified whimper escapes before she can stop it and Hannah finds herself blushing just a little.

Cassie’s skin flushes with heat at the soft sound Hannah makes, and she kisses the touch of pink that appears on her cheeks. The dichotomy between the woman who could kill a person 13 different ways, and the one who blushes in front of her, causes a well of tenderness to swell in her chest.

“God baby, I just adore you so much.”

Hannah laughs softly, covering her face.

“I’m glad. I’m kind of smitten, in case you couldn’t tell,” she murmurs, sliding her arms around Cassie’s waist. “For the record, I like you wet, too.”

Cassie smiles and nips at Hannah’s bottom lip.There’s a bottle of lavender scented shower gel that she squeezes out on her hands before massaging it slowly over Hannah’s neck and shoulders.

“Hmmm, tell me more gorgeous,” she teases.

Melting under Cassie’s hands, Hannah hums.

“I just love knowing I can do that to you. I love how you feel under my fingers, how incredible you taste.” She smooths her hands up Cassie’s sides and then over her breasts, savoring the soft slickness. “And God, how you sound.”

Cassie’s eyes glaze over as Hannah’s hands smooth over her skin, and she has to shake her head slightly to clear it as it goes hazy with desire.

“Hannah,” Cassie breathes, pressing a soft kiss to her lips as her hands roam over Hannah’s water slick skin.

“Just like that,” Hannah purrs, shivering even as she teases over Cassie’s nipples. “Just hearing you say my name makes me ache for you. Not just anyone can make me come without touching me.”

Cassie’s breath thickens as she leans in to kiss Hannah again.

“I love touching you, knowing I can,” she murmurs, her legs going weak at the slight teasing.

“You can do whatever you want to me,” Hannah says, realizing how true that is. The trust and love she feels for Cassie isn’t anything she ever expected to feel. Her tongue teases over Cassie’s lips, dipping between them and then retreating again as her fingers continue their exploration.

Cassie recognizes the trust, and it touches her heart as she kisses Hannah. She lingers on Hannah’s lips, savoring the taste of her, and the soft sounds she makes. Hannah’s light touch has her craving more of her, and she steps behind her, taking a second to press her cheek to Hannah’s shoulder before moving both hands up to cup her breasts. Cassie leans into Hannah, cradling her close as she massages her breasts gently, teasing the stiffened peaks with her fingers.

Hannah shudders, a soft breathy moan slipping past her lips. Somehow, having Cassie at her back, though it means she’s not looking at the scars, feels incredibly intimate, and Hannah’s heart races. Needing more of an anchor, she reaches back for Cassie, her palms slicking easily over the outsides of her thighs, aided by the water pouring over them. The angle of her shoulders has her chest pressing further into Cassie’s teasing fingers, and she can feel herself growing instantly wetter.

Cassie continues the gentle teasing, dropping her head to kiss Hannah’s shoulder. She can feel Hannah’s breath coming faster, and she increases the pressure slightly, using her thumbs firmly over Hannah’s nipples.

“Baby,” Hannah breathes, tipping her head back against Cassie’s shoulder. “You’re killing me.” She rakes her nails carefully up Cassie’s thighs and over her hips, pressing her ass back, addicted to the way Cassie feels against her. “But you know that, don’t you? You know exactly what you do to me.”

One of Cassie’s hands drops to Hannah’s hip, and grips tightly there in an attempt to steady herself as Hannah’s touch sends heat shivering along her skin.

“I can’t stop touching you,” Cassie murmurs, relishing in the feel of Hannah soft and pliant against her. She squeezes lightly at Hannah’s nipple while her other hand strokes softly on her belly, her fingers dipping and teasing lower, inches from where she knows Hannah wants her.

“God.” Hannah grips Cassie’s wrist to steady herself, tipping her head to nuzzle Cassie’s cheek. “Please, baby...I need you.” She’s already breathless and dizzy just from this. Everything about Cassie touching her is still novel and Hannah’s already sensitive enough.

Cassie moves her hand lower, tracing her fingers lightly over Hannah for a moment before moving away again. She grips her hips lightly, nudging her foot along Hannah’s instep, urging her to spread her legs as she works her hands over her breasts.

“What do you need?”

Hannah whines a little pathetically, fighting the urge to grab Cassie's hand and tug it between her thighs.

“Touch me,” she pleads. “I need your fingers, need you inside me.”

Her earlier orgasm had done nothing but stoke the heat pooling low in her belly.

“You should feel how wet you're making me.”

Hannah’s words fuel the heat inside her, and Cassie slides her hand down between Hannah’s legs, stroking her fingers lightly over her.

“God baby,” Cassie murmurs as she slips her fingers inside Hannah, pressing the heel of her hand against her as she moves inside her in a torturously slow rhythm.

The welcome pressure draws a gasp and a shudder, until Hannah registers that Cassie has no real intention of giving her what she wants just yet.

Her fingers slip around Cassie's wrist before her nails rake up her arm, a soft whine echoing in the confines of the shower.

“I love when you tease me,” she admits in a trembling whisper.

“Yeah?” Cassie asks, her breath thickening. Wetness seeps between her legs at the thought of Hannah desperate under her touch. She stills her hand, withdrawing her fingers slowly, brushing around the sensitive nub as she turns Hannah to face her. Cassie stares at Hannah’s flushed face, eyes dark with desire, and kisses her again, pressing her up against the cool shower wall.

The tile against her heated skin has Hannah hissing and arching and slipping her tongue past Cassie’s lips. Her palms skim over Cassie’s curves, over her hips and her stomach and her breasts, which only spurs her need.

“Fuck, baby.” Her hips roll into Cassie, seeking more friction and pressure. She knows from how Cassie sounds, how she's breathing, exactly what this is doing to her too, and her mouth waters at the thought of tasting her, at making her come on her tongue.

Cassie trails her fingers feather light over Hannah’s water slick skin as she arches against her. Hannah’s tongue drives her wild, and for a moment Cassie forgets the intention to tease and draw out Hannah’s pleasure until she’s shivering under her touch. Her fingers dig into Hannah’s ass as she bows up, reveling in the feel of Hannah’s softness against her.

“You’re gonna be the death of me,” Cassie murmurs a little breathlessly, gentling her fingers and skimming them up Hannah’s sides as her mouth comes to the spot under her jaw.

Hannah moans, tipping her head back, palming Cassie’s breast almost distractedly, teasing at the nipple with her thumb. Her knee slots between Cassie’s thighs, pressing up against her.

“Fuck,” she breathes. “You’re soaked.”

A gasp catches in her throat as she rocks against Hannah’s thigh, pleasure jolting into her system. She’s blind with desire for a moment, moving mindlessly, her lips skimming clumsily along Hannah’s neck as she arches her breast into Hannah’s hand.

“That’s all you baby,” Cassie says, a shaky moan slipping from her lips.

With unsteady fingers, Hannah slips between her thigh and Cassie, stroking against her a couple times before withdrawing, bringing her hand to her mouth to suck the wetness from her skin with a low groan.

“God, I love tasting you,” she says, ghosting her lips over Cassie’s as she speaks.

Cassie let’s out a pathetic sound at the loss of Hannah’s touch, and she grabs a fistful of Hannah’s hair before crushing her mouth to hers. The taste of her lingers on Hannah’s tongue.

“I can’t stop wanting you,” Cassie murmurs, biting lightly at Hannah’s bottom lip before easing her back and bringing her fingers between Hannah’s thighs, using slow firm strokes, as her mouth drops to her breast.

“Good,” Hannah chokes out, shifting against Cassie’s fingers, arching further into the wet heat of her mouth.

The coil of need in her stomach winds tighter until she's shaking between Cassie’s body and the wall. Her hands grip blindly at Cassie’s shoulders and some small, coherent part of her brain is aware she's leaving marks behind, but in her want, she can't bring herself to care.

“So close…”

Cassie eases her hand away, and lifts her mouth from Hannah’s breast as a coy smile curves her lips.

“You like being teased,” Cassie murmurs, skimming her lips along Hannah’s temple as she presses her hands to Hannah’s hips, pinning her firmly against the wall. Her own need makes her a little impatient, a little rough, but she bites back on it, as she kisses her way softly down Hannah’s body, grinning against her skin at each tremor.

“Jesus, Cassie,” Hannah moans, whining as she fights against Cassie’s hold on her, knowing it's fruitless. “Baby, please…”

She cards her fingers through Cassie’s water-slicked hair.

“I’ll give you anything you want,” Cassie says, as she keeps one hand anchoring Hannah’s hip to the wall and uses the other to slide her fingers inside of her. Her mouth lowers over Hannah and she laps softly at her.

“Just maybe not right away,” she whispers, slipping her fingers out of her, and kissing her softly right at her center.

“Fuck.” Hannah tips her head back against the wall and carefully shifts her weight to drape her leg over Cassie’s shoulder, opening herself further to the torture of Cassie’s mouth and her fingers. “I meant what I said, you can do what you want.”

She looks down, meeting Cassie’s darkened eyes, the sight stealing her breath.

Cassie shifts closer, easing Hannah open as she does, using her tongue to trace gently over her.

“I love the taste of you,” Cassie says, edging higher to take on some of Hannah’s weight as a hand comes to her thigh, anchoring her.

She slides her fingers back inside her, moving them as she watches Hannah’s face.

“Your mouth is incredible,” Hannah whispers, raspy and low. “I think about it all the time.”

She tightens purposefully around Cassie's fingers, tilting her hips slightly to take her deeper. The slight change in angle makes her shudder almost violently and Hannah exhales sharply as her fingers tug gently at Cassie’s hair.

“Take what you need from me baby,” Cassie breathes, kissing along the skin of her belly before covering Hannah with her mouth again, increasing the thrust of her fingers. Her hand releases Hannah’s hip to press lightly on her belly, stroking the skin there.

“Oh my God,” Hannah breathes, slowly rolling her hips, countering the steady, deep press of Cassie against her, inside her.

For the slow build of her pleasure, Hannah breaks remarkably fast, crying out, Cassie's name mingling with half curses and wordless whimpers until everything ebbs, leaving her shivering and panting, boneless and sated.

Cassie slips Hannah’s leg from her shoulder and stands, holding her lightly against her as she strokes along her hair and down her back.

“You’re so damn perfect,” she murmurs, her lips skimming over Hannah’s.

It takes a minute for Hannah to find her words. Everything’s still a little hazy and all she can do is kiss Cassie back and let her hands roam.

“Perfect’s a stretch,” she whispers finally. “You’re just really, really good at that.” When she tries to straighten up a bit, Hannah finds her knees are still a little wobbly, so she settles again. “Maybe too good. Not that your ego needs much stroking.”

Cassie grins, not bothering to hide the edge of cockiness as she holds Hannah a little more solidly against her.

“I have been known to make a few ladies weak at the knees,” she says playfully, but her gaze goes soft when she looks at Hannah.

“I think you might be the only woman who makes me go weak at the knees,” she confesses.

“Better be,” Hannah murmurs affectionately, cradling Cassie’s cheek. “Kinda hoping you’re all mine.”

It’s been years since she’s worried about losing someone. A small flash of fear threatens to lodge itself in her chest but she pushes it away. It’s in her head. Cassie is here and looking at her like that and it’s enough.

Cassie leans into her touch, keeping her gaze steady on Hannah.

“No one else could even come close, you’re my whole heart,” she says. She tugs Hannah away from the wall, warming her under the spray as she kisses her again.

The dread recedes entirely at that and Hannah relaxes again, coaxing Cassie’s lips apart with the tip of her tongue, barely teasing between them as her hands slide down Cassie’s back.

“I love you,” she whispers against her mouth. “So damn much.”

“I love you too,” Cassie murmurs, closing her eyes at Hannah’s touch as she deepens the kiss.

Hannah lets Cassie push a little but not much, intentionally keeping things light and teasing. She keeps one arm anchored around Cassie’s waist and brings the other up to trace the curve of her breast, circling the nipple with her fingertips.

Barely calmed desire rushes back with such force Cassie arches a little desperately into Hannah.

“God baby I need you to touch me,” she groans, her fingers digging into Hannah’s hips as she nips hungrily at her lip.

“Come to bed,” Hannah purrs, because the water’s cooling and she wants to take her time breaking Cassie apart until she can’t anymore. She reaches past Cassie to turn off the water and wraps a towel around her before finding one for herself. She can’t resist kissing her again, just one more time before stepping out of the shower, offering Cassie her hand.

Cassie squeezes the water from her hair and grabs Hannah’s hand, following her into the bedroom. She drinks in the sight of Hannah’s long bare legs under the towel, and her mouth practically waters.

“I need those incredible legs of yours wrapped around me,” Cassie murmurs, tugging lightly at Hannah’s towel as she brings her closer.

“So not conducive to me making you come,” Hannah says, biting her lip and grinning as she lets the towel drop. “I mean, you can have whatever you want. I’m just pointing that out.” She nudges Cassie to sit on the edge of the bed and crawls into her lap, legs splayed around her hips. “This work for you, baby?”

Cassie’s laugh goes breathless as she grabs Hannah’s ass, tugging her closer.

“Anything you do to me works for me” she says, fisting her hand in Hannah’s hair to tug her mouth down and cover it with her own.

Hannah deepens the kiss immediately, curling her fingers around the back of Cassie’s neck while her other hand returns to Cassie’s chest. She circles her nipple again before dragging the pad of her thumb over the stiffened flesh as her tongue twines with Cassie’s.

Cassie arches up, moaning against Hannah’s mouth as pleasure shoots straight into her core. Her fingers dig briefly into the taut skin of Hannah’s thighs, and then her palms skim up them, molding over the slender muscles there.

Her skin is burning, and she’s desperate for more as she tugs Hannah against her, panting slightly.

“Something you want, Cassie?” Hannah laughs softly, breaking from Cassie’s mouth to kiss down her neck. She rolls Cassie’s nipple between her fingers, pinching lightly, deliberately rocking her hips forward, though the angle does nothing but tease them both.

Cassie jerks at the touch, her head falling back as Hannah’s mouth leaves a searing trail down her skin.

“You know damn well what I want,” Cassie says with a laugh that ends on a moan. Her fingers squeeze at Hannah’s waist.

“God, touch me, I need you to touch me.”

Hannah grins even as she nudges Cassie back, lifting up on her knees to follow after her. With one hand braced next to her head, Hannah slides the other down between Cassie’s thighs.

“I am touching you,” she purrs, barely grazing Cassie’s skin.

Cassie bows up, a desperate sort of whine leaving her lips. She opens her legs in invitation as her hands come up to smooth along Hannah’s sides.

“Hannah you damn tease,” she groans, “god I fucking love it”.

“Can't help it,” Hannah says, watching Cassie intently, still teasing. “Kinda love you like this…” She wets her lips reflexively, dragging the tip of her middle finger along Cassie's entrance, not quite dipping inside.

Cassie hisses out a breath. Pleasure grows hot and heavy between her legs and her walls clench in anticipation. Her hands grow clumsy on Hannah’s skin as she moves to cover both her breasts, reveling in the silky softness.

“Please… Hannah,” she chokes out.

“Begging already?” Hannah grants her a small reprieve, sinking two fingers into Cassie all the way to the knuckle, stroking inside her, slow but firm. She lowers her mouth to Cassie's, sucking at her top lip, drawing it between her teeth.

The slight scrape of Hannah’s teeth against her lip intensifies the pleasure of Hannah inside her, and she bucks her hips impatiently as her hands smooth up Hannah’s neck and into her hair, still wet from the shower.

“Fuck baby.”

“Easy,” Hannah whispers between kisses, though she relishes the way Cassie moves under her. “I'll take care of you. Promise.” Her fingers move again, withdrawing almost entirely before sinking in again. This time, her hand twists enough to press her thumb to Cassie's swollen nerves.

Cassie gasps out a moan, and even in the blindness of desire something soft curls around her heart. There’s trust here, and for the first time she lets herself go completely, her hands dropping limply to the mattress as she gives herself over to Hannah.

“I’m yours,” she murmurs.

“Good girl,” Hannah whispers, sweetly kissing Cassie’s cheek.

She's seen Cassie a lot of different ways, but not like this--pliant and trusting. Despite the need between them, Hannah recognizes there's something more here.

“I love you, sweet girl. I've got you.”

She sets a steady rhythm, lowering some of her weight onto Cassie as her hand works between them.

“You feel so good, baby,” Hannah moans.

Cassie’s head falls to the side as she cants her hips up, seeking more of Hannah. Her weight feels just right, safe, and pleasure feathers across her skin as she breathes Hannah’s name. She feels the tightening, deep inside her, as the pleasure reaches its peak.

Kissing slowly down the side of Cassie’s neck, more tongue than anything, Hannah rubs slow circles over her clit, twisting her fingers deep, stroking just how she knows Cassie likes.

“That's it,” she murmurs against Cassie’s throat.

The combination of sensations undoes her as a wave of hot pleasure rolls over her, and makes her cry out, Hannah’s name a breathless sound on her lips. Her walls tighten like a vise around Hannah’s fingers as she bows up, shaking with release.

“God, Hannah.” Cassie melts back into the mattress on a sigh.

“Mmm, I love doing that,” Hannah murmurs, still just barely moving her fingers, just to feel Cassie shiver. “Don't think I'll ever get over it.” She trails lazy kisses across Cassie’s shoulder and up her neck, wherever she can reach without moving too far.

Cassie groans, stretching languidly as Hannah’s fingers send shuddering aftershocks through her system. Her hands move up to stroke along Hannah’s skin as she presses her lips to her hair.

“I’m not complaining,” Cassie manages, blinking a little as her system settles.

“It’s only, like, 10pm,” Hannah realizes, catching sight of the alarm clock on the end table. She eases her fingers out of Cassie and traces her thighs instead, too entranced with touching her to stop completely. “It feels so much later. Work tomorrow?” She’s lost track of what day it is and her brain is too fuzzy to figure it out just now.

“I can barely remember my damn name, my work schedule is a mystery,” Cassie mutters, but she’s smiling as she draws Hannah up to her, tucking her head under Hannah’s chin. Her fingers feather over Hannah’s belly, tracing along the outside of the scar there, and she nuzzles at Hannah’s neck.

“”Hmmmm, it’s Tuesday today, so yes, work tomorrow.” Cassie says a little regretfully, as she tugs the covers over them.

#Hannah rivera #cassie conner #the brave #my fic #conera

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jaemtens · 6 years

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Rescue (Chapter 7)

seventeen | junhao | side meanie / vernkwan | chapter 6 of 10 | 27.9k

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written with @rendawnie | updates every saturday morning

summary: When Soonyoung finally “agrees” to let Junhui get a dog for their apartment, he realizes that he needed something a little bit more than a puppy. Enter Minghao, the bona fide Bad Boy™ with tattoos and piercings. Oh, and he doodles puppies and kittens in their Probability and Confirmation class.

chapter 7: junhui

After that, Junhui didn’t leave his apartment, or his room, for nearly three days.

It was probably an overdramatic response. He was very aware of that.

Soonyoung was aware too, judging by how often he banged on Junhui’s door as loud as he could when he walked by, and also how he refused to continue delivering Junhui’s meals to his room instead of making him come down to the kitchen table to eat them, after the first day.

It was just...Junhui had never felt so embarrassed in his life. He’d never screwed up this royally, or accidentally, or humiliating...ly.

If he’d known, if he’d had any inkling whatsoever of Minghao’s situation, he would have done so many things differently. All of the things, maybe. He could see now how many times he’d said insensitive things, how often he’d made mistakes. He never wanted to hurt Minghao’s feelings, and it seemed that, through misunderstandings and missteps alike, that was all he’d managed to do. And so, that being the case, Junhui saw no other appropriate course of action but to sequester himself in his room, where he couldn’t be a danger to society at large. Especially the most handsome members of it.

Two days passed. Junhui still didn’t have any answers. He didn’t know what he’d expected.

As embarrassed as Junhui was, he knew that Minghao was probably even more so. Junhui wanted to find him, to tell him that he didn’t care at all what Minghao’s situation was, except to try and help him if he could. But, that just wasn’t going to be possible, and Junhui understood why. It was a matter of pride, for Minghao. Junhui couldn’t go to the shelter. He was positive Minghao wouldn’t want him there. (He was also pretty positive Minghao wouldn’t want him anywhere, currently, and that thought made him sadder than he was ready to admit.)

When Junhui finally got out of bed, finally forced himself out of his room and out of the apartment, he decided to go to the library on campus, to maybe get some studying done. He was aware that he’d been neglecting his classes and education in a massive way, and it was starting to make him feel guilty. So, he ended up on the second floor of the large building late one night, so late that he was probably the only one there. He was happy about that part. The less people around him, the less he would have to try and pretend he was okay with anything currently happening in his life.

He had just flipped open his Probability and Confirmation text, and dug out the extra large bag of homemade trail mix Soonyoung had made him, because even if he couldn’t express it, Junhui knew his best friend cared about him a lot, when Junhui realized that he was, in fact, not alone in the library.

He wasn’t alone, but he had been so distracted by digging out each and every M&M Soonyoung had thrown into his trail mix that he didn’t even notice someone sort of hovering in his orbit awkwardly, waiting to be acknowledged.

Finally, there was a clearing of the throat, and Junhui looked up, mouth full of red M&Ms (Soonyoung knew they were the only color Junhui would eat) and eyes wide.

There was a cute guy standing next to Junhui, sort of. He was far enough away to be respectful, but close enough that Junhui was fairly sure he wanted to talk about something. Or maybe just stand there, being quietly adorable. Either/or. He looked familiar, but Junhui couldn’t quite figure out why. The guy didn’t try to say anything, at first. He seemed content enough to let Junhui squint up at him, trying to figure out where he’d seen him before. The guy waited patiently for what could have been entire minutes, until Junhui sorted it out in his head.

Junhui had seen Minghao in the library several times before, and this guy was always with him. At first, Junhui had thought they were just acquaintances, but finally, over the course of several ogling sessions (study sessions. Study sessions.), Junhui had figured out that the guy was actually tutoring Minghao. If only Junhui were as lucky to have a tutor who looked like that, instead of Soonyoung, whose attention span tended to last just long enough to get through one or two flashcards worth of notes.

If only Junhui were lucky, maybe he could be the one tutoring Minghao. On whatever subject he wanted. Any subject, really. Junhui would probably have tried to learn Russian, if Minghao needed him to.

Anyway.

The guy must have noticed the wheels in Junhui’s brain slow to a steady pace, once he stopped thinking so hard, because he smiled and spoke for the first time, in a light, lilting voice. “Hi. I’m Joshua. I’m Xu Minghao’s tutor. You’re Jun, right?”

Junhui blinked. “Uh… yes? How did you know that?”

Joshua furrowed his brow, as if he was trying to figure out a way to answer that question that wouldn’t incriminate anyone. Junhui sort of very much hoped it would incriminate the shit out of Minghao, even though knowing how Minghao felt about him wouldn’t change the fact that he currently wanted nothing to do with Junhui.

“Oh. Um… I guess Minghao just mentioned you sitting near him, in a class. Maybe. Once or twice,” Joshua replied, fumbling over the words, while Junhui frowned harder and harder. Minghao had mentioned him to his tutor. He wondered what exactly the context had been.

Haha yeah, there’s this huge fuckin’ nerd that sits next to me in Prob and Conf. I can hardly concentrate, his dorkitude is so loud, he could imagine Minghao saying.

Or maybe, I tried to talk to this idiot and he basically ate his own face the entire time, until it became so unbearable that I literally had to run away from him to save us both the humiliation.

Both of those seemed like reasonable options.

“Oh,” Junhui mumbled after a while. “Okay?” He really wasn’t sure where Joshua was going with this, or if he wanted to go along with him.

Joshua cleared his throat again, sitting down in the chair across from Junhui, chin in his hands. “I haven’t seen Minghao in several weeks,” he said. “I’m getting a bit worried.”

“Oh,” Junhui repeated, feeling a little dumb. “I haven’t seen him, either. He hasn’t been coming to our class for about that long.”

Joshua looked even more concerned. “I’ve tried to get ahold of him, but he’s not answering emails. I don’t have his phone number. I wondered if you might have it?”

Junhui couldn’t help snorting. “Why? He doesn’t want to talk to me. Probably ever again.”

Joshua frowned. “Well, that doesn’t make sense. He--” Just as quickly as he’d begun speaking, Joshua stopped himself. Junhui watched him regroup silently. He didn’t know what to say, what to do about anything anymore. Maybe there wasn’t anything he could do.

After a few moments, Joshua licked his lips and nodded once, getting up from the table with his mouth set in a straight line, instead of the smile he’d given Junhui at the beginning of their conversation. “Listen, just… if you see him, will you let me know? Here’s my number,” Joshua said, tearing a sheet out of Junhui’s open notebook without permission and stealing his pen to write on it. Junhui didn’t protest. He was too lost in thought.

“You can give it to Minghao,” Joshua told Junhui, straightening up and setting the pen back down next to Junhui’s notebook. “Just…” he started, and then he trailed off, thinking again. “Just tell him I’m worried about him and I’m here to help if he needs it, okay?” Joshua finished, pushing his hands into his pockets.

Junhui stared at Joshua’s number numbly. “Okay,” he muttered, not raising his eyes to Joshua again. He sat there staring at it so long that eventually, Joshua just sort of wandered away.

Junhui felt sick. He was so confused, and now he was worried about Minghao on top of everything else, and he still didn’t know what to do about any of it. All of his thinking was getting him nowhere, and also, it was giving him a headache.

He couldn’t even study, after that. Junhui just sat in the library, alone, for another fifteen minutes, looking at the torn piece of paper in front of him, and then he gathered his things, using Joshua’s number as a bookmark in his Probability and Confirmation textbook, and walked home.

Somehow, Junhui managed to make it there in one piece, despite the fact that his head was down the entire time, gazing into the proverbial, infinite void that his life had become. He didn’t look up at all, even as he climbed the steps to the door of his apartment building, pressed the number for his floor on the elevator, and rode it up. He didn’t look up from his shoes, not even once, until he was in front of Mingyu and Wonwoo’s door.

Junhui glanced down the hall at his own apartment, just a few doors down. Mingyu and Wonwoo had only recently moved into the same building as Junhui and Soonyoung, and he’d never actually been over to their place. Or invited over. Fleetingly, Junhui wondered what time it was. He was sure it was probably way too late to knock on the door, way too late for polite company, or desperate advice, or whatever in the hell he was considering asking for.

He was saved from his own thoughts by the door in front of him swinging open without preamble.

Mingyu wore a wide grin and his pajamas as he leaned against the doorframe, regarding Junhui. “Hey, man. You gonna stand out there all night?” he asked pleasantly. Junhui blinked several times.

From inside the apartment, Junhui heard Wonwoo’s voice. He could also hear the eyeroll in Wonwoo’s voice, the one that was sort of always there, whether it was intentional or not. Junhui could understand. Mingyu was kind of a handful, if their class together was anything to go by.

“Just come in, Jun. Close the door behind you, you’re letting out all the bought air,” Wonwoo called, and Mingyu took a step back so that Junhui could slip in. Once the door was shut behind him, as Wonwoo had ordered, and he was standing in the front hallway with Mingyu, his taller companion grinned again.

“I’m off to bed. You can hang out with the night owl,” Mingyu said, jerking his head toward the kitchen, where Wonwoo presumably was. “Later, dude.” Mingyu yawned, shuffling away to the bedroom as Junhui peered into the dimly lit apartment.

“In the kitchen,” Wonwoo confirmed a second later, and Junhui followed the sound of his voice, creeping through the apartment carefully. The last thing he needed at a time like this was to knock over some precious object with his clumsy limbs, something probably irreplaceable and expensive. He didn’t know why Wonwoo and Mingyu would have anything like that, really. Junhui was just prepared to continue being a total and complete human disaster for the forseeable future, so it seemed to go with the territory.

Thankfully, he made it to the small kitchen unscathed, and so did all of Mingyu and Wonwoo’s possessions. Wonwoo was sitting at the table, glasses on and reading a book quietly, but he glanced up when Junhui started hovering in the entrance uncertainly.

“God, you’re so fucking awkward. Sit down,” Wonwoo said with exasperation, getting up to go into the kitchenette. “How do you take your coffee?” he asked, pouring two cups from the steaming pot on the counter.

Junhui wrinkled his nose, finally pulling out his phone and checking the time, like he’d meant to do before. “Wonwoo, it’s one o’clock in the morning,” Junhui said, tossing the phone onto the table and sitting down obediently.

Wonwoo chuckled, throwing him a glance. “Like I said. How do you take your coffee?” he repeated, separating each word as if it was a whole new sentence and staring a hole into Junhui’s forehead, suddenly.

“Milkshake,” Junhui replied meekly, and then he slumped over in his chair and waited for his drink.

Less than two minutes later, Junhui had a milkshake in front of him, a cup full of milk and sugar and not a lot of coffee, and Wonwoo had his pure, unadulterated beverage, and as Wonwoo took the first sip, he regarded Junhui thoughtfully. “So. What are you doing here?”

Junhui groaned. “I don’t know. Just... falling apart, I guess.”

Wonwoo squinted at him. “Go on.”

Junhui could feel all the words bubbling up, all the things he’d been worrying about and stuffing down and worrying about and kicking to the side for weeks, since Minghao. He could also feel things from before that, crap that had been bothering him for ages that he’d tried to compartmentalize. Spoiler alert: compartmentalization was not one of Wen Junhui’s very limited skills.

“Okay, because like… I haven’t done this before. Like, ever,” Junhui started, staring at his hands wrapped around the coffee mug. “I haven’t even been out to my friends for that long, and I’ve never actually dated anyone since I came out, and…” He stopped, biting his lip. “I’ve never likedanyone enough to want to date them. And now I like Minghao. I like him so much.” By the time Junhui stopped talking, his voice was almost at a whisper. Wonwoo was just watching him quietly. It was unnerving.

“I like him so much, and I’m just screwing everything up. Everything I do seems to make him mad,” Junhui huffed out, feeling himself blush. “I’m trying so hard to be cool, but I’m not cool, and--”

“No, you’re really not,” Wonwoo said dryly.

Junhui rolled his eyes. “So supportive. So helpful.” Wonwoo snickered.

“Anyway, I just… I feel like I can’t do anything right. The harder I try, the worse everything gets. And now he like, monumentally hates me, or whatever, and I don’t even know why!” Junhui exclaimed, banging his fists on the table lightly in frustration. “I don’t know why.”

He picked up his coffee cup and took a long swig, barely noticing how hot it was on his tongue. Junhui sighed after he’d swallowed the sweet liquid down, trying to figure out where to go next. He supposed it didn’t actually matter, because nothing he’d said so far had made any sense, anyway.

“I just want another chance. Like, a real chance. I want to fix whatever I did wrong, but I can’t,” Junhui said.

“Why can’t you?” Wonwoo asked. As if it were that simple.

“It’s not that simple,” Junhui bit out. “I can’t just… okay, like. Please, please, for the love of god, don’t tell anyone this, but…” Junhui paused, unsure if he should tell Minghao’s secret, but… it was important to the story, he figured. “Minghao’s homeless. He lives in a shelter.”

When Junhui raised his eyes to meet Wonwoo, his companion looked calm. “I know,” he replied straightforwardly.

Junhui threw up his hands in disbelief. “What the hell?! Did everyone know this but me??” he shouted, and then he looked back in the direction of the bedroom guiltily.

Wonwoo chuckled. “Don’t worry. Mingyu sleeps like the dead.”

Junhui nodded a little. He gave himself a three second break before he went on. “How did you know?” he asked, quieter.

Wonwoo sighed, looking away. “Mingyu and I were out doing our grocery shopping a few months ago, and we saw him bringing a box or two into the shelter across the street from the store,” he told Junhui. “At first, we assumed he was just helping someone take their stuff inside, but when we came out of the store, he was sitting by the front desk filling out paperwork.”

Junhui frowned. “That’s not exactly a sure bet as far as clues go,” he muttered, and Wonwoo shrugged, nodding.

“It’s not,” he agreed. “But then, we saw him again a couple weeks later, in the morning. He came out of the shelter looking like he’d just showered. I’d guess he was probably going to work,” Wonwoo mused. “That’s when we started to figure it out.”

Junhui’s jaw dropped. “Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

Wonwoo gave him a disapproving frown. “Because it’s none of our business. He obviously doesn’t want anyone to know, or he would go around telling everyone he met. Sometimes you just have to leave things alone, Jun.”

Junhui shook his head so hard that it gave him a headache. “No. I can’t. I can’t leave him alone, Wonwoo. I want to help him,” he protested, hearing how his voice started to rise in pitch frantically.

Looking at Junhui seriously, Wonwoo considered his next words before he said them. “I get that, Jun. I really do. But…” he began, stopping to sip his coffee before he went on, “Minghao seems like he has a lot of pride,” Wonwoo said, echoing Junhui's thoughts from earlier. “A lot of pride that can be easily wounded. You get what I’m saying?”

Junhui sighed. “Yeah.” He did get it. He just hated the idea of it, suddenly. He thought for a moment, before turning his face back to Wonwoo. “Do you think I’ve fucked it up forever?” Junhui asked.

Wonwoo laughed quietly. “Nah. You can’t fuck something up that hasn’t even started, Jun.”

Crossing his arms, Junhui frowned. “It sure feels like I can,” he muttered.

Wonwoo rolled his eyes. “Don’t be so dramatic, dude. It’s fine. You haven’t burnt any imaginary bridges.”

Junhui chewed on his bottom lip, thinking. “Then… what do I do? How can I fix it, when he’s up and disappeared off the face of the earth?” he asked, his mind running through all the possibilities at top speed.

Wonwoo stretched, getting up from the table to refill his coffee cup. Junhui honestly had no idea how Wonwoo functioned so normally, with this schedule and these habits. Junhui had only had one cup of late night/early morning coffee (okay, with a lot more sugar than Wonwoo preferred), and he was already starting to get the shakes.

Granted, a lot of that nervous energy might have been to do with the Minghao Situation. But, Junhui was suddenly manifesting the ability to compartmentalize enough to convince himself that they were two totally separate entities. A very healthy approach, he thought smugly to himself as he waited for Wonwoo to reply.

When he sat down again with a freshly filled to the top coffee cup, Wonwoo clasped his hands together on the table in front of them, and between that and the glasses starting to slip down his nose ever so slightly, he was beginning to look like any number of Junhui’s professors. Hopefully, what Junhui would learn from Wonwoo would be a lot more helpful in his daily life. Even if it just helped for one day. One day and one chance were all he needed.

“I think you need to go to the shelter, Jun. You need to make a gesture,” Wonwoo decided finally.

Junhui swallowed, hard. “He doesn’t want me there,” he said softly, even though part of him begged to be heard, telling him otherwise.

Wonwoo shook his head. “I think he does, deep down. Even if he doesn’t want you there, per se, he wants you. He wants to know you care. He wants to know you don’t care about his situation, or that at the very least, you don’t judge him for it,” Wonwoo said wisely. Junhui leaned forward, listening carefully.

“Just go, and be honest with him. Make him listen to you. Try your best, and I think you’ll finally get through to him,” Wonwoo advised. “And if you don’t…” he trailed off, regarding Junhui. “At least you can say you tried. That’s all you can ever ask of yourself, Jun.”

Normally, Junhui wasn’t a crier. He was pretty reserved in his emotions. But something about this whole thing, this whole Minghao thing, was pulling at his heartstrings in a way he’d never experienced before. He’d had approximately five hysterical meltdowns over Minghao so far, and suddenly, before Junhui even realized it was happening, it became six.

To Wonwoo’s credit, he didn’t make fun of Junhui for it. He just pushed their chairs next to each other at the table and read his book in silence while Junhui cried on his shoulder until he couldn’t cry anymore, patting his shoulder every so often in between turning the pages of his book.

By the time Junhui finally left, it was three in the morning, he’d had two more cups of sugary sweet coffee, and his eyes hurt from all the crying he’d done, but he felt lighter. He felt hopeful.

He felt determined.

#seventeen #svt #junhao #junhao fic #svt fic #jun #minghao #the8 #junhui #xu minghao #wen junhui #my writing #rescue

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eloarei · 6 years

Text

WIP Game

List the things you’re excited to work on this year in as little or as much detail as you like, and then tag some friends!

Tagged by @enchantedtalisman (and again it won’t tag you. Tch. Sorry. But thanks for the tag!)

(Behind a cut, because you don’t want to read all that. ...Or maybe you do?)

In no particular order, because my level of excitement changes at the drop of a hat: 6 BNHA fics, and one each FFXV and FO4. 1700 words of synopses and babbling. (Friends who read my stuff: if you wanna skim through these and tell me which one(s) (if any) you’d most want to read, that’d be rad. =D Will it influence what I work on? Who knows? My inspiration is fickle as shit. But it couldn’t hurt.)

1. “Touch2” -- current WIP, 10k + notes. BNHA. Dekumight. Estimated total: 20k? Picking up right where “Touch” left off, this fic is a slightly more detailed/slow/slice-of-life story than its predecessor. The 10k I’ve written so far takes place over the course of only 2 days, and it’s mostly Toshi and Izuku getting to know each other, and Toshi being yelled at by his manager (an OC called Suzuki). The general plot of the story doesn’t deviate very far from canon, as far as I’ve planned. “Touch2” will probably cover at least up to the entrance exam, but I’m not entirely sure. Given that leisurely pace, there’ll probably have to be a Touch3 and 4 as well, if not even more. I’ve been slowly hacking away at this one since the start of December, just in between whatever else I might be working on. Kind of got to a point where I need to actually think about what happens next? ^^; Also, it’s gotten too long to be a one-shot, I think, but I’m going to have to be careful how I split it up. It’s not written for splitting… Well, I’ll figure it out. Just gotta keep writing first.

2. “Make the Most sequel, and side stories” -- only notes. BNHA. Dekumight. Estimated total: lots??? I’m lumping these all together, but this includes quite a few stories, some of which I have plans/notes for, some only ideas. One of the first is a fic that might be, at most, half the length of MtM, which is the events of MtM from Toshi’s POV. This was actually requested by a friend, but it was something I kind of already wanted to do, which is cool. Other side stories include perspectives from other characters, some things like dates and vacations, Izuku learning to use his powers, and some extra NSFW scenes, because why not? After all of those, I intend for there to be an ‘official sequel’, taking place towards the end of Izuku’s college run, which might function as more of an epilogue than a sequel, due to the potential lack of actual plot. Geez there is just so much potential for this series to go on in side-stories and extras and etc. I actually get a little mad at myself whenever I neglect to continue it, because it’s sort of my main, well, IP, I guess you’d say. It’s my kudos breadwinner. XD I should just do it!

3. “Loveless epilogue” -- only notes. BNHA. Dekumight. Estimated total: 7k? A short...er sequel/epilogue, taking place roughly a year (I might change that) after the main story, revolving (spoiler alert) around Toshi figuring out if/when/how to propose to Izuku, and summing up how things have gone in the past year. Mushy because I love marriage, okay guys, I just love it so much, and also a little bit morbid because of an in-universe tradition that could be considered either romantic or creepy, depending on your views. =D I actually ought to write this one like… immediately, while the main fic is still fresh in my mind. It’s extremely self-indulgent, maybe more than just, y’know, my normal writing. But I think at least some of the people who read LOVELESS will like it. ^^ And I will, I think. And that’s all that really matters, right?! *shakes head ‘no’*

4. “Waste” -- current WIP, 1k + notes. BNHA. Dekumight(-ish?), and Deku+friends. Estimated total: 15k???? No. Probably more. A Fallout fusion. Vault 211 (21-1 or twenty-one one) has been carefully breeding superpowers into its population for the past 200 years, but if yours doesn’t show up by your 18th birthday, prepare to be kicked out on your ass into the unforgiving wasteland. Guess who’s the newest resident of the wastes? Lucky for Izuku, he meets a frightening creature who takes to looking out for him. ‘Human’ under some description, he’s sure, this guy has radiation levels through the roof. Burly super-mutant by day, gangly rotting ghoul by night, he doesn’t exactly have a lot of friends, but boy is he good at surviving in the hellscape that the world has become. I freaking love Fallout a whole lot, and look, Toshi/All Might is so very much a ghoul/super mutant, and vaults just give you so much free reign to give people powers and etc etc, look, it just seemed like something that would work. Not sure really how it’s going to go, but we’ll see. =]

5. “Nana/Toshi darkfic” -- only notes. BNHA. Nana/Toshi (probably NSFW) and Dekumight. Estimated total: 20k??? His mentor was beautiful, kind, strong-- perfect. He didn’t realize she was being eaten away by a dark pit in her heart. He didn’t know if leaving her alone would help it. He just wanted to be with her so badly, to please her, to make that smile real, and she lacked the fortitude to refuse him anything that would make him happy. A fic about Nana and Toshi becoming perhaps too close, and Nana struggling with depression. Following the canon timeline moderately closely, it shouldn’t be a surprise that it will include a major character death, and the fallout surrounding it. Hoo boy did the desire to write this fic just hit me like a ton of bricks a few weeks ago. This is going to be a dark, sad, uncomfortable story, most likely. And although it will end with Dekumight, the large part of the plot will still revolve around Nana/Toshi, so I’m not sure most of my normal readers will want to touch it. XD;;; I think the inspiration to write this came somewhat from the feeling that the ending to LOVELESS was not nearly as dark as it could have been, haha. Every so often I just want to challenge myself and see how many boundaries I can push. ^^;

6. “Feed” -- only notes. BNHA. Dekumight. Estimated total: 15k? In a world ruled by a vampiric shadow known as All for One, Izuku’s group has been trying to find ways to fight him. Nearly everyone is of this man’s blood now, since he started handing out powers to gain followers. But it’s said that an artifact of some sort exists still which can give the power to defeat him. Izuku, with the purest blood of his group, is chosen to seek it out. But the artifact is a vampire, the last of AfO’s first ‘children’, frozen and starving after failing to defeat his ‘father’, and Izuku almost doesn’t survive the encounter. I want to write this fic, and I think I should do it while it’s still cold and gloomy, because that’s the feel of the setting, but if I get distracted and don’t get around to it, I probably won’t be too upset.

7. “Parents AU” -- current WIP, 6k + notes. FFXV. Gladnis + Ignis&Noctis. Estimated total: 40k? Teenage Ignis and Gladio happen to be babysitting the toddler prince when the Empire attacks, and in the chaos they manage to get safely mixed into the crowd of civilians fleeing the city. They decide to treat him as their own until they can be sure it’s safe to return him to someone with more seniority. But will it ever be safe? Fifteen years in hiding says no, and even when Noct is old enough to be asked to save the world, there’s no way in hell his parents are going to let him go it alone. I tried to continue writing this the other day and it was terrible. Painful. I almost cried. Literally every word of the 30 or so I managed before I gave up were the hardest things I’ve ever written. I think if I go back and play the game again (which I’d like to, since there’ve been updates and DLC), I think it will be easier. Honestly though, this is one of my favorite things I’ve yet written, so if I don’t see it to fruition, I will be moderately pissed.

8. “Same Heart” -- current WIP, 30k + notes. FO4. Estimated total: 90k (35k for act 1) The great synth detective Nick Valentine is recaptured by the Institute, remade and reset. He awakes to his new life underground, unaware that he ever roamed the wasteland-- except for the rare moments when they plug in his old memories so they can grill him for info. Though the memories are gone again after every session, they leave an aftertaste of distrust for the people he’s working with, until it’s too much to ignore. Meanwhile, he finds himself as the only person who seems to truly care about the little boy they’re all calling their savior, doing his best to help him grow up with some modicum of love in this sterile environment. When Nick finally decides to break out of their fancy little prison, it’s not a question whether he’ll take Shaun with him, and it’s obvious where they’ll go: to find the parents the Institute stole him from. This one haunts me, because I spent like 3 months doing practically nothing but writing this last year. I got almost, almost all the way through the first act (out of 3), and then… stopped. Now I know it’s going to be impossible to get back into. And this is already a very different story for me, because it’s essentially a gen fic. The intention is for acts 2 and 3 to focus on Nick and the ‘sole survivor’ Nora, but the whole first act is about him half-raising her son, Shaun. I really want to finish this, or geez, at least the first act! Because it is painful having 30k sitting around that nobody has ever seen. And it’s pretty decent! But even though I have 6 chapters done, I don’t want to start posting it until it has a halfway decent ‘conclusion’, so I need to finish the act. I have to.

And I’ll tag… uh… @oldseablues, @braincoins, @thenightisdarkandfullofbooty, @orionskingdom, @animeuzumaki7, @blessedblooduniverse, @rangrids, and anyone else who’s reading this and is also a writer. =] Tag me back so I can see it, please! ^^

#elo talks #elo fics #tag meme

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therewillalwaysbeapril · 4 years

Text

Chapter 4: Sixteen Hours

6:30 AM The alarm rang abruptly in the stillness of the morning, a rude shrill noise, splintering our warm, nocturnal embrace and throwing us both into the coldness of the day.

“April, we gotta get up”, I said, mumbling as I shook off the last remnants of sleep. She groaned softly, rolling over and pulling the covers away. “Hey, get up. Geee-tta UGH-PUUUU! Get TU DA CHOPPAH!” I did my terrible Arnold Schwarzenegger impression loudly and poorly, adding in a loud grunt for full effect.

“Argh, I need muh clothes, my boots, my motorcykalll”, she said, in the same bad Austrian accent without opening her eyes. “Come ONN, do it. Do it Nah-OW!”

Stumbling out of bed, vision still blurry, and nearly tripping over the corner of the blanket now fallen to the floor, I reached over and grabbed from the basket the first item of clothing on the pile of clean laundry that we neglected to fold from the previous night. I pulled open the top drawer of her dresser and felt around for a bra. I threw both toward the bed as I made my way to the bathroom. April put on her top as she stood up. Hair a mess and eyes barely open, April exuded a dreamy, other-worldly quality as she floated from the bed to the sink wearing the dark red floral patterned shirt dress I had bought for her the weekend before. I blow dried my hair into a more presentable state and shaved as she washed her face and finished combing her hair.

I packed April’s belongings into her backpack for her, the both of us hurrying downstairs to my car. After stopping by a McDonald’s drive-thru on the way, we ate Egg McMuffins sitting in the early traffic heading toward Downtown LA. I looked at her as she opened a ketchup packet.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be careful!” she said, laughing as she carefully squirted the ketchup onto her hashbrown.

Briskly walking up the parking lot escalators and half-skipping across Pershing Square, April got to the bus stop just in time as the vehicle screeched to a halt. “WESTWOOD/SANTA MONICA” said the display. A quick kiss goodbye and she was off to class.

8:00 AM The office was dark as I stepped out of the elevator. Walking toward my desk, I was greeted by lights flickering on as motion sensors began to stir. Fresh cup of coffee in hand, I left the kitchen for the far side of the floor toward my favorite viewing spot.

The Los Angeles morning was peaceful when viewed from high above. Cars moved slowly down Broadway; I could hear their distant honking noises in the early rush hour. Construction workers below near Third Street walked carrying their equipment, passing by the shops just beginning to open in Grand Central Market. From my hawk’s nest I saw a cyclist zipping down Grand Avenue past the Museum of Contemporary Art, in front of which a food truck was beginning to set up shop. My breath and the steam from my coffee fogged the glass as I stepped closer to look at the crowd of people gathering by the Broad. The early light bathed my city in a warm amber glow, thawing its sleepy commuters as a new workday began. Flecks of gold and saffron twinkled as the dawn bounced from the stirring skyscrapers and automobiles, blinding me. I, too, was beginning to wake as I finished my coffee.

With my headphones on, back at my desk, I continued sketching out the wireframe concepts from the day before. Wireframes are the foundation of plotting out designs for interactive products such as apps and websites. They are a high level way of designing ways in which someone can use a product and the organization for which types of information and interaction appears on which screen, before a designer has to focus on the finer details such as animations, visual appearances, and the style of smaller items such as buttons. Even though the other designers created wireframes in programs I was also familiar with such as Adobe XD or Sketch, I always took great care in sketching out early ideas neatly on paper. I felt there was a purity in shaping ideas away from a computer, a kind of humility in making things with my hands.

8:30 AM The office is still dim as I make myself a second cup of coffee. This was one of those sluggish days; I felt slow to start, and was glad to still be the only person in the office. There was less pressure this way. I returned to my desk and cleaned up my lines with an eraser, reinforcing others with a Sharpie. Boxes with crisscrosses represented images, various other shapes representing icons and call-to-actions. Simple line patterns signified text, clearly showing the underlying grid to the layout. Adding final touches, I drew an outline of an iPhone over all of the screens before using a green colored pen to create the markings that showed how a user interacted and navigated from screen to screen. I felt pride for the cleanliness of my draft, as I never knew whether the second draft in the computer would be made by myself or a different designer. Finished, and satisfied with my work, I walked over to the simple Kanban board on the far wall and moved the task’s corresponding post-it note from the column labeled “in work” to the column labeled “done”.

Aside from a few coworkers from accounting, the floor was still mostly deserted. Sitting back and listening to the rest of Bach’s Goldberg Variations on my headphones, I fidgeted at my desk for a while. Impatient, I walked back over to the job board and grabbed one of the tasks from the column labeled “backlog” and moved it to “in work”. This should keep me occupied, I thought.

10:00 AM Standup was always kind of fun. Normally I have always preferred to work alone, with headphones on, lost in thought as I built designs and mockups, in an almost-meditative state of flow. However, I liked my coworkers very much, and it was also nice to see everyone at the beginning of the day and update one another on our work progress in the morning as we created the pieces of our product together. I enjoyed this kind of organized interaction that afforded me boundaries and space to create.

<Walalala..>, texted April. It was her way of greeting. Warm and cheerful, albeit at times a little silly, it was a greeting that I had come to love. It would also be a salutation I would receive less and less over time until I would not see it at all. <What you doing?>, she added.

<Lol. You should pay attention! I’m pretty tired too. I don’t think I woke up yet>

<Haha, I miss you a little too.>

<Pfft, you still need me to remind you?>

<Ha, you should pay attention in class. Your mom will kill me if you fail because of me>

11:00 AM Sketches spread out on the table before me, I began to create the second round of digital wireframes. As much as I enjoyed sketching, this step was also one of my favorite things to do. The useful aspect having hand sketches was their looseness — from a high level perspective, during this stage there were still so many possibilities. Creating the first digital wireframe versions, despite their inherent roughness, narrowed down those possibilities. To do so felt like taking a camera lens and turning it slowly into focus. At this stage, it was not a crisp focus, but much more recognizable as a coherent direction. The process was therapeutic as it was methodical; moving through it step by step, there was room to make improvements on the fly, perfecting each idea. However, today, my process of refinement would be interrupted by a different task.

There needed to be a version of our project for a new client, said marketing. A simple mockup of our app must be made in the style of our new client, a baseball team. The refinement of the new screen designs would have to wait. Grumbling to myself a little, I closed the program and neatly piled the sketches into my drawer.

<Heyyy, why u ignoring me?>

<Sorry, some other stuff came up at work>

<I’m sorry. Would you feel better if you ate something? What are you gonna get for lunch?>

<Expensive grass, haha>. “Expensive grass” was April’s name for salad. They always cost more than they should, she would remark.

<btw…>

<what’s wrong?> Nothing good ever happened when April said “by the way”.

<We’re not breaking up. We can make this work>

12:00 PM It is lunchtime. Mood now sour, I didn’t feel like leaving the building. After informing my deskmates that I was taking my lunch break, I grabbed a stale bagel from the kitchen and microwaved it with a slice of cheese. Taking that and a diet soda from the fridge, I returned to my viewing corner.

We had only recently moved into the forty fourth floor of the building from six floors above. The company had now grown bigger and the fiftieth floor was not enough space. However, it was only the design, marketing, and accounting teams on this floor, leaving most of it empty. In fact, we only occupied one corner, leaving the other three quiet and deserted. I enjoyed taking walks around the empty areas, sometimes even bringing my cello to work and practicing in one of the empty rooms during breaks. Today though, I only wanted to look outside and think.

Now midday there was visible smog in the Los Angeles air. Protestors were forming on Grand Avenue. I looked closer, curious as to the reason for this group. I could not make out the writing on their signs. A car accident was visible further down on the 2nd Street intersection, blocking it off. The authorities closed off one of the lanes, backing up traffic. A bus awkwardly took up both lanes as it attempted to merge into the available space. An adjacent driver made a rude hand gesture out of his window. I sighed, feeling exhausted as I learned against the wall near the window. I sat on the floor as I drank my soda and looked out of the floor to ceiling window, thinking. The conversation I thought of was not with April, but one with someone else, from a different day, in a different language.

•••

<Yeah, I took her to the airplane museum the other day.>

<Well, she kept asking me to stay over, and then I had to stay with her after she crashed her car. Lately though, she tells me she just doesn’t like it when I’m away. It feels weird, but I’m really happy with her and I love her, so I guess I’m not complaining. She’s been coming to work with me and taking the bus to school too>

<Hey, you should pace yourself. All couples need their space from time to time.>

<Maybe? Sometimes I go to work and five minutes after I leave she texts me that she misses me. I think she’s very sweet.>

<Okay, I’m just looking out for you. What if she turns out to be one of those possessive types?>

<Hey! I knew it!! Is that why you didn’t answer any of my calls or texts last winter in China?>

<Sorry. I guess it’s just weird, what happened between us.>

<Well, nothing happened between us!>

<I know! Well, I don’t know. You are one of my best friends, and what happened affected me very deeply. It may have been nothing to you, but it was definitely something to me.

<I’m sorry about that. I really am. I was as confused as you too. I never meant to be cruel. I hurt you, and I ended up hurting myself too.>

<I’m glad we’ve moved past it and we’re still friends>

<Yes, I remember. And I will keep my word. I just need to figure this out. She’ll come around eventually. I really think the two of you would become great friends.>

<Well, you gotta figure it out eventually, because this is just awkward what you’re doing>

•••

1:00 PM I snapped back to reality as my phone alarm went off. It was time to go back to work.

The caffeine was beginning to wear off. Still debating whether or not I should have a third cup of coffee, I flipped through the Android Material Design Guidelines online, pondering what visual branding treatments were acceptable within Google’s design parameters. Writing down the correct color hex values on a notepad, I began to change colors on app elements in Photoshop, reskinning the interface. The phone beeped again, as another text message arrived from April.

<I’m sorry. I want to stay with you too. But I’m so worried>

<About what?>, I answered.

<Yeah, but what if we DO break up eventually? You’re not a doctor and I’m supposed to marry a doctor.>

I stopped working. Taking off my glasses, I sat back in my chair, rubbing my forehead. I was getting very tired.

, I texted back.

<There’s nothing wrong with what I do. I am a designer and I’m good at it. I make a decent salary and I like my life>

<It’s different>

<Well that’s just your viewpoint. We’re just different, I guess>. I saved my work and walked to an empty conference room.

<Why do you even love me?>, I texted. My thumbs began to sweat. Typing was becoming difficult.

<I’m getting back to work>

I stomped back to my desk, angrily chucking my empty soda can into a nearby wastepaper basket. A couple of coworkers stared.

3:00 PM For the next two hours, I tried my best to focus on creating more animations. More interactions. I compared the mockups I made against the Android and Apple guidelines. So far, so good. Sending the finished mockups back to marketing, I went back to the kitchen and made myself the third cup of coffee.

I chugged the hot beverage, nearly searing my throat. I went back to designing the wireframes. There were only three hours left in the workday, and I originally wanted to have had this perfected at the end of the day.

<Are you done with class yet?>. There was no answer from April.

Frustrated, I placed my phone face down on the table and returned to the designs. These have to get done, I thought. So little time. Fuming, I angrily threw the boxes together on the computer screen, connecting the button hotspots together as violently as someone could inside a digital space.

“Hey are you ok?”. It was Julie, who sat across from me behind my monitor. “I can hear you breathing from here”

“I’m fine”, I said. I sat back in my chair and looked at what I’ve made. It was sloppy and nowhere near the level of detail that I have been known for around the office.

“Take a break man. I just got an email that we have until the end of the week for these screens now”

“Oh…”

“Yeah. You can just chill”

“I think I’m gonna take a walk then.”

4:00 PM I looked at my watch as I waited in the elevator. Who does she think she is, I thought. So what if I’m not a doctor? Life can’t only be about status. I was so mad. That is such a shallow way of thinking! And it wasn’t me who started all this. I was just minding my own business working. She was the one who had to bring up Taiwan, and her parents’ crazy expectations for who she should be dating.

I walked outside briskly in the shade of the tall buildings. It was much louder now that I left the lobby. A street performer was beating a drum across the intersection. A crazy person was yelling about the end of times on the other corner. Good. Noisy enough that no one could see how angry I was.

And I hated the way she texted. How am I supposed to always be at her beck and call? I have a job to do; I can’t be there to simply answer every time she worries about crazy hypotheticals. I was doing fine today, I should’ve simply not answered. And now that she’s finished ruining my day, she’s stopped texting and has gone back to whatever she’s doing leaving me to pick up the pieces. Every single month, we have to have some fight about something completely stupid like this. Every single month —

Oh.

April had complained about being tired. April had experienced stomach pains during class. I counted the days since the last time I remembered similar complaints. There were many things I remembered for her. April could be so forgetful.

“Twenty-seven, twenty-eight….”, I counted in my head. I knew what she was going to need.

I stopped at the Rite Aid on 5th and Broadway. Quickly making my way through the aisles, I picked up a pack of Ibuprofen, a box of what appeared to be feminine pads, and a bottle of water. The cashier handed me the items in a paper bag after I made my purchase. Strolling further south, I began to think about what transpired.

Did she really mean all that she said? Perhaps a deeper question was, WHICH of what she said did she actually mean? You can’t tell someone you love them for who they are but also want to change them, I thought. Girls just say crazy things during their time of month right? I checked my phone.

Still no answer.

This is bad, I thought. Perhaps I was too harsh. Her car is in working condition. She chose to take the bus because she genuinely wanted to spend time with me. And now she’s probably on the bus home, in pain. All for me. I’m such a jerk, I thought.

Ducking into Bottega Louie on 7th, I bought a box of half dozen French macarons. They were rather pricey, but came in a beautiful box and were, I had heard, delicious. The small rigid box was not unlike jewelry packaging, with beautiful calligraphy and gold speckles dotted throughout its powder purple surface. It was a small gift that was sure to brighten up anyone who was having a less than perfect day.

6:30 PM The workday was now over as I closed my work laptop and packed away my things. The bus from UCLA arrived as I waited on a bench in Pershing Square.

“Hey what took you so long?”, I asked as I took April’s bag from her.

“I had the most horrible day!” she said.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize I sounded so mean—

“No, not you! My period started and I forgot to bring pads so I had to use tissues. And my phone died, and then the bus had to take a detour. So I needed to get off and wait for another bus, but I couldn’t use Google Maps and I’m so tired and I just want something to eat”

“Well, first things first I guess”

I handed her the box of macarons and discreetly showed her what was in the paper bag. “Let’s find a bathroom,” I said.

She looked into the paper bag. She looked at me. She started giggling, the happiest I’ve seen her all week.

“What? What is it?”

“Have you never bought pads before?”

“Well, no, but I figured you needed them. Was I right?”

“Those are panty liners, not pads!”

“Oh.”

“It’s okay, I’ll be alright. Cmon, let’s eat”

•••

8:30 PM After April had a chance to change, I took her to a nearby Hong Kong styled cafe. It would be nice to have some porridge, she said.

As we sat down and waited for our food, by reflex I folded April’s chopstick wrapper into an origami chopstick stand, as I have always done since our first date. I looked out the window into the dark.

The San Gabriel traffic outside was a lot calmer compared to the city. It was quiet and I could just make out the sounds of crickets. A high school couple walked out of the boba shop across the street, laughing to themselves, carefree. An elderly man picked out a newspaper from a box near the entrance. I felt a soft caress on my forearm.

April handed me a crudely folded flower made from a chopstick holder.

“I’m sorry about today. I keep forgetting how to fold that fancy origami, but I want to thank you for taking care of me.”

She smiled the familiar funny smile.

•••

9:30 PM As we walked in the darkness at a nearby park, digesting our meal, I stayed quiet. How can I make all nights like tonight?, I thought. Is there really an expiration date to our happiness?

Perhaps reading my mind, April said, “I don’t know what we’ll do if I really have to leave…”

I looked at her and kissed her forehead.

“Whatever”, she added. “If I have to go back to Taiwan, I guess I’ll just get another boyfriend, and it’ll be a doctor this time! HA HA!”

I did not laugh.

I let go of her hand and walked a few paces ahead, sullen.

“I’m kidding!” April grabbed my arm. “I really do love you, alright?”

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