#this is very Rosemary-core | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

windvexer · 3 months

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What counts as a spell? Is intent all you need or do you have to do something before to get it all juicy and stuff.

Hi Anon! What a fun question, because there is no answer except this CAN OF WORMS you just opened.

There is no consensus anywhere as to what constitutes a "spell."

There is even LESS consensus as to what makes a spell go.

Intent is a good starting place. It is probably where you should start for all acts of practical magic.

But I find that in it's common form, the idea of intent + willpower = magic has been diluted past the point of utility for most people.

Like if we're talking about "intent is everything" I'm reminded most closely of Chaos Magic. But Chaos Magic is not a school of "just set your intent and you've worked magic!". It's a very rigorously developed system.

In Hine's Condensed Chaos, he lists the third Core Principal of Chaos magic as technical excellence, and I quote:

One of the early misconceptions about Chaos Magic was that it gave practitioners carte blanche to do whatever they liked, and so become sloppy (or worse, soggy) in their attitudes to self-assessment, analysis, etc. Not so. The Chaos approach has always advocated rigorous self-assessment and analysis, emphasized practice at what techniques you're experimenting with until you get the results you desire. Learning to 'do' magic requires that you develop a set of skills and abilities and if you're going to get involved in all this weird stuff, why not do it to the best of your ability?

Later in the book, Hine likens "magical powers" to the concept of achievements, and goes on to say:

Something which is an achievement is the result of practice, discipline, and patience.

Shortly after:

Chaos Magic is not about discarding all rules and restraints, but the process of discovering the most effective guidelines and disciplines which enable you to effect change in the world.

(In above quotes, all emphasis my own)

But these ideas get taken - and I'll give a big nod to the LOA which is just the worst kind of brainrot for encouraging the "intent is all that matters" mindset - and the ideas get diluted so much that people are literally out here saying, "so all those people who spend years studying magic in order to get results are buffoons? All I have to do is imagine what I want and it will be delivered to me? All humans since the start of history just have to decide they want something and it will happen in a miraculous manner?"

(Not you, Anon. I'm just in a mood)

In my mind, yes - something beyond intent must occur in order to make spells go.

But what?

Anon, have you ever heard that dumb belief floating around that all herbs in a spell can be replaced by rosemary, and all stones in a spell can be replaced by clear quartz, and these two things are "universal substitutes"?

I am 95% sure that this nonsense was based on two very popular dictionaries Cunningham wrote in the 80s, the Encyclopedia of Crystal, Gem & Metal Magic, and Encyclopedia of Magical Herbs.

In the very long entry for Clear Quartz:

Quartz crystal is used as a power amplifier during magic. It is worn or placed on the altar for this purpose.

And from Rosemary:

Rosemary is generally used as a substitute for frankincense.

And I believe that someone somewhere got the idea that since clear quartz amplifies all other powers, it therefore somehow magically Ditto-copies all other powers, and like a shapeshifter somehow becomes something it is not nor ever was.

And, you know. What's the difference between subbing out frankincense and blackthorn between friends?

These beliefs have become so popular that sometimes when unscrupulous blogs rip off entire Cunningham encyclopedia entries and paste them into tumblr posts (without credit), THEY INCLUDE THE EXTRA MADE-UP BIT ABOUT ROSEMARY BEING A UNIVERSAL SUBSTITUTE.

Anon, your question is "is it just intent or do we need other stuff to make it go," but sadly,

IMO common beliefs about the stuff that makes spells go have also been diluted past the point of utility for most people.

Because if I sat here and said, "hey Anon, it's not just intent, you also have to use correspondences ^-^/" then the very first thing you are likely to run into is absolute nonsense about correspondences. IMO, effective utilization of correspondences is a skillset based in research, theory, and technique.

Or if I said, "you also have to raise energy! 👍", this may be mistaken to mean, "set intent but also visualize white light inside of a candle," because the concept of raising energy and visualizing has been (IMO) diluted past the point of utility for most people. I believe that effective utilization of energy work is a song composed of many notes and chords, several of which you must practice before you can utilize it.

And to complicate all of this, which non-diluted things in which combinations you need to make the spell go depends on what paradigm you operate off of, because while there are approximately one billion ways to do magic that works, my currently very dim worldview is that most people who are talking about magic are doing magic that doesn't work,

and in my opinion the actual basis and reasoning, like the rationality behind the magical systems is really important. Because you need that shit to understand what it is within that system that makes the spell go.

And you need to understand what makes the spell go to make the system fit into your life without breaking it, and in order to troubleshoot problems without making things crumble further.

Because when people don't understand the basis and reasoning you end up with "rosemary is a universal substitute" and "imagining white light makes the spell go."

There are a few circumstances where you can totally strip technique from theory and be successful, but there are also a hell of a lot of people out here feeling shit about their practice because their spells never seem to work.

So.

I really just recommend choosing what school of magic you would like to learn about and participate in, and reading an introductory book on it.

This is because it is the job of introductory books to explain the principles and theories behind a system of magic, and most importantly, what makes the magic go, and a step-by-step primer on what you, the practitioner, are supposed to do to make that kind of magic go.

Despite above rambles I'm really not a Chaote, so I can't recommend a strong primer. As far as I'm aware, Liber Null & Psychonaut by Peter J. Carroll is a core text.

For Traditional Witchcraft, try The Crooked Path by Kelden.

For something more Wiccan, I can't recall having anything bad to say about Psychic Witch by Mat Auryn.

If either of these things are too Witchcrafty for you, try Six Ways by Aidan Wachter, which is still witchcraft, but it hits different.

For a general primer on helping your spells go, try Elements of Spellcrafting by Jason Miller.

#answered

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sluttysanemi · 3 months

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Tide of Reunion

Giyuu Tomioka x Fiancée!Reader

The moon shone tenderly amid the forest's evergreen trees. A night of longing and drive, as the wind howled gently. Soft clouds form along the starry sky, capturing a visual impression.

Your shared home, in which you resided with Giyuu, was nestled among the seemingly unending woods. Your home is constructed with large woodwork, layered with a sloping roof.

The exterior doors were adorned with translucent paper, creating a serene atmosphere.

You lie calmly, asleep within the futon, a comfortable warm within. You are surrounded by poetically painted scrolls on the walls and tatami mat floor surfaces.

It had been overly long since your fiancée slept beside. He was hauled along strings of responsibilities, leaving you confined to your own presence. Though he hadn't written, he had on occasion sent you the plucked marvels of flowers he came across, indicating to you that you'd very much lingered in his mind.

Laying within the warm, padded material, your mind trailed aimlessly.You slept tranquilly, pondering on what your partner could be doing at this very moment. As your chest lifted and fell delicately, the foyer doors slid open.

It was promptly followed by the familiar ring of footsteps. They tread particularly lightly, preventing from grumbling a disturbance. It creeps across the hallway until it settles behind your door. You were yet to stir, as you continued to aspire, your mind venturing through absurd existences.

Careful hands lightly nudge the door wide before promptly closing. A wave of soothing lavender and rosemary aromas caress your senses with ardor. Deep, azure eyes glare at you fondly, as if not more relieved to see you. Despite his excessive thrills, he did not awaken you so suddenly, instead carefully undressing himself from his own uniform, leaving him bare.

He swiftly clothes himself in loose robes, carefully trailing to the futon in which you laid in. He lies beside you, pressing his palm against the side of your cheek. He relished the warmth of your skin, caressing it with his thumb.

You felt his familiar touch and gradually awoke. Your tired gaze moved to your tranquil spouse, who had held you with boundless tenderness.

You smile lazily at him, shifting closer.

“Giyuu…”, you whisper, your mind steadily attempting to recognise the scene.

“I didn’t mean to stir you...”, Tomioka replied dismissively.

You did not care for him awakening you, instead overly glad to see your partner be beside you once more. You retort his touch, placing your own hand to his face, and watch him longingly. You move in, gently laying your lips on his after so long.

Giyuu embraced quickly, amiably reciprocating your kiss. He was exceedingly sweet, overcome with the relief of finally resting alongside the one he cherished most. He felt his heart gradually pummel harshly.

He moves atop of you, needing to hold your body closer. You wrap your arms around his sturdy neck, continuing the passionate display. His breathing rolls heavily from his lips, consumed by passion.

He misses your warmth. Your scent. Your embrace.

He'd spent so long beneath frigid, lonely sheets. Exhausting his body to its very core for those around him. Weary and miserable.

He needed you desperately. More than he had needed oxygen.

His soothing hands caress your thigh, tenderly pushing your gown up.

"Can I?" he asks, ensuring you felt safe.

You nod, permitting his entry. His fingers travel over your thighs, to your very clit. His slender fingers trail along your slit, leisurely gathering slick. Filthy noises echo as his digits continuously glide.

Your hands maneuver along his back, as you whine delicately against him. Starved so long from his touch, you were greedy. Endlessly greedy.

You prompted your thighs against his waist, suggesting a desire for more, much more. He groans and sits up, grasping the opposing sides of your thighs. You could feel his impending love, grazing against your sex. It pulsed and twitched, longingly to be embedded within your warmth.

With a gentle push, he softly slides himself within you. He almost falls forward, releasing a pleasurable gasp. Your inner-walls grasped at him intently, almost hindering his movement. He pants, attempting to consolidate his thoughts into one.

With a sharp inhale, he carefully begins to roll his hips into you. Sensual, soft movements, disinterested in forcing himself from your comfort. Though you provided unending pleasure, all he longed for was to be with you again. Feel your connection. Your intimacy.

And you pleaded for it too. You cup his cheek, coaxing him to come closer. To hear his sighs of pleasure, to feel his pulse of ecstasy. And he does. He lowers his face inches from you and kisses you. He continuously assures of how much he loves you. Adored you. Treasured you.

Over and over, lips graced along each other, momentarily separated for breath, before rekindling again in a moment of euphoria.

“Soft… so soft.”, he babbled, prompting his lips to the tender skin of your neck.

Your fingers glide to his back, caressing gently. Muscled and firm. Your unexpected touch had driven him to tilt his head back in delight, overwhelmed. Even your smallest details would strike him deeply.

His shaft endlessly pumping within you, a lewdful display. He was overcome with love, whining pleasurable groans into the air. And you followed. This was marvelling. He was only angelic.

Your cunt flutters tenderly around him as he repeatedly pleases you, driving you to squirm deep inside.

He felt himself to finish soon, a surge of bliss rising within him. His thrusts grew briefly clumsy and hasty.

Pushing him towards his impending climax, you whine thoughtlessly.

“I love you, Tomioka!”

And it finishes him.

With a harsh push, his cock spurts ropes of love within you. Buried into you, he plunges every ounce of his desire deeply to you. The air is coated thickly with your unending affections for the other.

So long without each other's love, there was not a greater peace than this moment.

With hasty and drowsy eyes, he lies in the same position, unconcerned with pulling himself away from you. He was quick to drift to slumber, resting against your breast. Your fingers caught in his dark hair, you felt yourself submerged in the soft seas of paradise.

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gingerbloof · 4 months

Text

flick of the wrist (hard dom ascended astarion x spawn/consort fem!tav)

contents: dead dove/dne, manipulation, predator/prey chasing, technically cnc/dubcon, knife kink/picquerism, blood, mentions of batstarion, anxiety, fear, self conflict, rough fingering, oral (female receiving), threatening death, punishment, unprotected p in v sex, slight impact play, choking precum, orgasm denial/ruined orgasm, yelling, ascended astarion being absolutely terrible, shallow praise, whole lotta degradation, absolutely no fluff at all word count: 4,557

It was merely an accident, you swear.

You were simply wandering around the Crimson Palace to entertain yourself while your master— lover, finished some important paperwork in his study. You seemed to have taken a wrong turn, wound up in a forbidden wing, and were lost.

Your heart drummed against your ribcage as fear started to settle in. You knew what awaited you if he found out how far you slipped away from him. You had to go back. Quickly.

Your feet quicken down the large, dark, unfamiliar hallway, your eyes darting around hoping to see something familiar to you. The sound of your feet slapping against the cold floor was almost deafening. Thank the Gods for your dark vision, otherwise you’d never be able to get out of here.

The more you looked around you realized this wing hasn’t been tended to in years. Dust coated every surface, and cobwebs were spotted in almost every corner. The smell of musk filled the air and every door was barred shut. The only light that illuminated the dreary scene was a few rays of moonlight peering through the cracks of the barred windows. An uneasy feeling set in your stomach. No wonder he didn’t want you down here.

Soon, you saw a large portrait of yourself sitting on your lover’s lap, just put up in the west wing last week. It was a beautiful painting with him dressed to the nines in red and gold and you naked, as he suggested so many years ago sitting upon his throne. He held a golden goblet, wearing his signature smirk and blood trickling down the corner of his mouth and you sat on his thigh with a warm smile, just as he instructed you to do so for the painting.

Good. I’m getting closer to his study. You thought to yourself.

You hurried down the hallway, the flickering candle lights of the west wing soon coming into vision. Just as you turned the corner you stumbled face first into a broad, familiar chest. You steadied yourself as those three familiar scents encased your entire being. Bergamot, rosemary, aged brandy. It was him.

Your breath hitched in your throat as you meekly looked up at him. His hands were on his hips and a scowl was painted on his face. He knew.

“There you are, my pretty consort,” He purred, his voice not matching his incensed expression.

Very uncanny.

You backed up slowly, only for your back to be met with the hard stone wall. He walked closer to you and rested his forearm on the wall right above your head, grimacing down at you. His other hand gently traced along your jaw and down your neck. You shuddered and nibbled on your lower lip nervously, knowing that his gentle touch could quickly turn rough if you didn’t explain yourself quickly.

“Where… have you been?” He demanded. You opened your mouth to speak, but was only able to make the faintest squeak, fear and, unsurprisingly enough, arousal clouding your senses.

No matter how menacing he could be, the power he held over you excited you. You truly were his puppet, helpless and always willing to obey, and honestly? You preferred it that way, though you could never bring yourself to admit it, not even to yourself. But he knew, regardless. And he loved it. He did say from the start how obedient you would be, and how right he was.

His hand suddenly pressed against your throat, a gasp escaping your lips as you could feel his fingers pressing pressure against the sides of your neck, cutting off blood flow. You could feel your arousal starting to burn like molten lava in your core, despite the terror that clouded you.

“I asked you a question,” He growled. He leaned his face closer to you, his lips barely meeting yours. “Where. Have. You. Been?”

A whimper left your throat as you summed up the courage to speak, your voice hardly a whisper. “I-I just… Wanted to take a walk…” His eyebrow raised as he briefly peered down the hallway where you came from. His grip tightened. He turned back to you and growled darkly, feeling the vibrations from his throat shake your chest.

“What have I told you about that hallway, hm? What’s the number one thing I’ve told you not to do?” He questioned, pressing you up further against the wall. Your voice struggled against the pressure he was putting on your neck.

“T-To never go where the darkness resides… To never enter that hallway under any circumstances.” You answered, earning an approving hum from your master. “Very good. Now would you care to tell me why you’ve disobeyed me?” You sighed in relief as he released some of the pressure on your neck, giving you this chance to speak. It had better be a good enough reason for him, otherwise a world of torture would encase you soon.

You gulped down your fear as you spoke. “I simply took a wrong turn, my love,” You made sure to sound as innocent as you were, even giving him slight puppy eyes, which you knew he loved. Maybe he was in a good mood today and would go lightly on you? Alas, a dark chuckle left his lips as his body crashed against yours. You could feel his cock start to grow against your stomach and you shuddered, feeling your own arousal start to pool in your panties.

“Tsk tsk tsk,” He clicked his tongue, shaking his head. He leaned in close to whisper against your ear. “You are just the dumbest little slut, aren’t you?” He smirked, his rough hands starting to wander across your body. “You’ve resided in this palace for how long and you still don’t know how to get around?” His dexterous hands quickly tore off your dress, leaving you in only your undergarments. He threw the torn fabric to the side, his gaze enslaving your mind. You shivered at the sudden cold air caressing you, feeling your breath quicken in panic.

“It was a mistake! I promise!” You pleaded, desperately trying to escape your fate, even though your dark twisted side wanted nothing but for him to punish you. Another laugh left him, the vibrations plummeting into your chest. “You sound so pathetic, little love,” He growled as a manic smile grew on his face, beautiful ivory fangs on full display. Suddenly he gripped a fist full of your hair and started dragging you to your special dungeon. You yelped as you helplessly followed him, mixes of please and apologizes fleeing your lips. It’s not like you had a choice, however.

“No use in trying to get out of your punishment now. You’ve made your choice,” He spat.

Soon enough you both crossed the threshold of your dungeon. He called it your dungeon because it was different from the other spawn’s. There was a beautiful king sized bed with the most expensive and exquisite velvet set Astarion could buy. A wall of special toys– tools, he called them – like paddles, rope, and gags hung neatly on the wall for him to use at his disposal on you, and cuffs were conveniently placed at each corner of the bed for your hands and feet. On the outside you hated this room, knowing how exhausted and mentally broken he would leave you everytime you entered it, but on the inside… It was your own personal pleasure dome.

As you enter, he lets go of you, slightly shoving you toward the bed. You trip over yourself and land on the velvet sheets, looking up at him like a scared little mouse about to be pounced by a panther. His crimson orbs pierced into your soul as he chuckled. “Now don’t look at me like that,” He purred, striding slowly toward you. “You knew exactly what you were doing, didn’t you? You wanted to be punished. Wanted to see what happened if you disobeyed me,” You couldn’t move, let alone speak. Dread and excitement encased your senses as he walked ever closer, ridding himself of his jacket and shirt in the process.

Then, that’s when you notice… He left the door open. Your eyes darted between him and the door, contemplating whether or not to make a run for it. You were certain your punishment would be so much worse if you did, which is why it surprised you when you quickly stood and made a run for the door, sprinting down the hallway desperately trying to increase the distance between you and your doom.

You heard him growl as the door slammed behind you, footsteps rapidly approaching. “Get back here, you wretched whore!” He yelled after you. You panted as you continued to sprint, breaking into a cold sweat. You felt a smirk twig at the corners of your lips. Oh how you enjoyed this.

Your vampiric speed was impressive. You soon found yourself at the front staircase of the palace. You thundered down the stairs, accidentally bumping into one of the many maids. You offered a quick “Sorry!” as you started down yet another forbidden hallway. You found a closet, and quickly hid yourself inside, kicking up a cloud of dust in the process. You steadied your breath and clamped your hand to your mouth, daring not to make a sound.

Soon enough you heard slow footsteps outside the room you were in, and heard Astarion’s voice as he spoke with the maid. “Hello, dear. Have you seen my consort?” His honeyed voice always worked wonders, unfortunately, because the maid was quick to tell him where you ran off to. A low growl left his lips as you heard the footsteps approaching. You trembled as he spoke again, a sing-song tone in his voice.

“Daaarling, where are youuu?” His voice was mixed with honey and poison. You peeked through the small crack of the door and watched him gently stride around the room, lightly sniffing the air and searching for you. As you leaned back the wood under you creaked deafeningly loud. You eyes widened as you heard the footsteps stop. Had he heard you?

A dreadfully long 30 seconds passed, and then you heard the door close. You sighed in relief softly. He was gone… You slowly opened the door and looked around the room. No Astarion to be seen.

You found your lips starting to curl into a small smirk. It was good to be on the winning side for once. You quite enjoyed a little game of hide and seek with your lover, especially when he gave up.

Or so you thought.

As you crawled out of the closet you scanned the room, and as you did you saw a small black bat hanging from one of the corners. It couldn’t be…

Your eyes widened at the realization just as the bat swooped down in front of you, soon turning into a dark cloud. In a split second, Astarion was standing in front of you again, smirking devilishly.

“There you are,” He purred. Your heart pounded against your rib cage and you went to turn to run again, but he stopped you in your tracks by tightly gripping your wrist.

“Ah, ah, ah…” He tutted, yanking you towards him so you were chest to chest. “I am getting quite sick of your games, pet. No more running from me, do you understand?” You slowly nodded, looking away from him meekly. He frowned once again and he grabbed your chin roughly, pulling your head to face him.

“Use your words. You don’t want your punishment to be even worse, do you?”

His voice was somewhere between a purr and a hiss. Sweet, yet terribly demanding. You gulped and spoke softly. “N-No, master… I understand.” His frown turned into a smirk at your words, placing a quick kiss on your head. You knew this small moment of gentleness would end rather quickly, so you savored his little kiss as much as you could.

Astarion then snapped his fingers, and suddenly you were back in your dungeon with him. This caught you by surprise, and you quickly looked around to familiarize yourself with your surroundings. Has he always had this power?

He chuckled lightly at your reaction as he shoved you onto the bed once again. You submitted this time, falling back and looking up at him innocently, hoping to change his mind again. But that was far out of the question. You dug your grave, now you had to lie in it.

“You have been such a bad girl,” He tutted. He was quick to bind your hands and feet to the bed and crawl on top of you. You struggled against the binds, grunting and whining. “I-I’ll be good, just please, let me go!” You pleaded, your words mixed with lies. You didn’t want to be let go. You wanted to be put in your place.

“Ha!” He laughed, ripping your bralette to shreds and throwing them aside and clasping his hand around your throat once again, silencing your whines. “Oh, my sweet, I know you’ll be good… After this,”

That’s when he pulled a silver dagger from his pocket. Your eyes widened as the blade glinted in the moonlight that poured into the room. Surely he didn’t mean…

“Here’s what is going to happen, my beautiful, nasty consort,” He growled those last three words, tracing the very tip of the blade down your chest, freezing your body. You watched him, a terrified expression on your face.

“I am going to indulge myself in you, whether you like it or not… However, if you come, it will be the last breath you ever take,” Your breath hitched at his words, fear clouding over you. “Just a little flick of the wrist, and I’ll put you out of your misery. Permanently.”

He grinned as he swiftly flicked his wrist, shallowly slicing your skin. You hissed in pain as you watched the droplets of blood trickle down your chest and onto your stomach. He was quick to bring the blade to his mouth and lick away the small amount of blood that pooled on it. He groaned in ecstasy as the warm liquid coated his tongue.

Once again, your body betrayed your mind, feeling your core ignite once again at the thought of being threatened. It reminded you of when you first met just outside the wreckage of the Nautiloid; when he pulled you into the dirt with him and held a dagger to your throat. Oh, how you missed the man he used to be sometimes…

Before you could even realize it, your panties were cut with the dagger, and the cool air of the room brushed against your sex, making you siver. He shoved your legs open as much as he could, given the cuffs around your ankles, and gazed upon your glistening cunt. It was twitching and swollen, begging for release. And he had barely even touched you yet…

A dark chuckle left his lips and shook his head in disbelief. “Such a slut, drenching my perfectly good sheets at the thought of being sliced to ribbons… ” He slowly drug his finger up your slit, parting your lips and making you whine. You bucked your hips just had his finger slid over your clit with a feather light touch. He withdrew his hand and you let out a shaky, needy breath. He grinned devilishly at you, waving his finger at you and tutting.

“Ah, ah, ah… No moving, unless you want this to slice deeper,” He said, pressing the edge of the blade to your throat, replacing his hand with it. You flinched and tried backing away from it, only for him to press it a slight amount more against your skin, threatening to slice.

“I-I won’t move…” You whispered, shutting your eyes tightly. An angry growl erupted from his throat as he laid a small, yet sharp smack to your cunt, making you yelp. “Did I allow you to speak?!” He shouted. Tears formed in your eyes as you shook your head silently. “Hm, didn’t think so…” His voice was once again dripping with honey. The way he could change up his tone so quickly made you so confused, you couldn’t tell if you should be excited or scared by him, so for now you would settle with both.

“Now, where was I…” He mumbled to himself as he started to gently caress your sex again with two elegant fingers, making sure to keep the blade in his other hand firmly pressed against your throat. You dared not to make a sound, knowing that would only end in your demise.

As quickly as his tone had changed earlier, Astarion shoved those two fingers knuckle deep inside of you, not caring whether or not it felt good. However, it did feel good. Very good… It was the sweet release you have been craving since you started your little game of tag, but you knew you wouldn’t get anything but that tonight.

You gritted your teeth and let out a short breath, trying not to make any noise. Astarion noticed your struggle and chuckled. “I didn’t say you couldn’t make any noise, pet. Sing for me,” You didn’t hesitate as a loud whine left your lips as he curled his fingers up and into you, starting to pump them in and out of you at an alarming rate. He didn’t hold back at all; he knew how quickly you could come, and it was his mission to deny you over and over until you were a quivering mindless mess.

He shifted down your body so the tip of his dagger was pressed to your belly and his lips were wrapped tightly around your clit, sucking on it harshly and lapping at it with his tongue. You tried not to move or breathe too hard, knowing any sudden movements would cause the sharp tip of the blade to stab into your stomach.

He withdrew his fingers to lick a long stripe from your entrance, tasting the overflowing juices coming from you, to your clit, which jumped in excitement as he flicked his tongue expertly against it. His eyes trailed up to you, watching you struggle not to move. Your core tightened as you felt your release rapidly approaching, but you didn’t get too hopeful. You knew your place, and you didn’t dare to disobey your master yet again. So you held in your orgasm, the muscles in your pelvis and core struggled against the squeeze. It burned so much… But right now, you’d prefer this torture over the alternative.

Then, as you suspected, he pulled away, stopping all pleasure and dimming the fire inside of you.

As his movements stopped, you opened one of your eyes to look down at him, a single tear rolling down your cheek.

He smirked evilly. His plan to break you was working, and he had barely even started. A sweet tone left his lips as he sat up onto his knees, unlacing his trousers and freeing his cock. You gazed upon it as it stood proudly, the tip leaking a bit of precum from being denied any attention for so long. You felt yourself starting to drool and Astarion laughed darkly at you.

“Look at you, such a pathetic little cock slut, aren’t you? I’ve always loved that about you…” He purred, starting to stroke his cock at the sight of you terrified, yet enamored by him.

His words were thorns to your heart.

Loved… He hadn’t said anything about loving you, unless it was to manipulate you in… Gods, you didn’t even know how long. But something in you hoped and prayed that he was genuine this time, even if it was about something filthy.

“You want it?” He asked with a bit of a baby voice, snapping you back to reality. You looked at him with pleading eyes, not saying a word. He arched one of his silver eyebrows and tightened his grip on his blade and drew his arm back slowly, silently threatening to strike if you didn’t speak. You flinched slightly and quickly nodded.

“Yes… Yes, I do.” You said breathlessly. He grinned, and surprisingly leaned down to lay a small kiss to your forehead. “Very good, my treasure.” He purred, sitting back up on his knees and lining himself up with your entrance.

You breathed hitched at every movement he made against you, teasing your hole by shallowly fucking you with the tip. He held the shaft of his cock to control it more than his hips could, towering over you with his signature smirk painted over his beautiful, terrifying face. He pressed the edge of the dagger snugly against your jugular as he leaned his lips down against your ear.

“Do try to keep still, my treasure… I would hate to soil these sheets even further,” He whispered. You laid underneath him helplessly and felt your legs shake in fear and anticipation. He continued to tease you with just his tip and you whined loudly, hoping you were still allowed to make noise.

He growled, growing impatient with himself. Before you could even process it, he was fully sheathed inside you, his cock twitching up and against your g spot. He stretched you wide open without any warning, which hurt a bit at first, but soon the pain turned to immeasurable pleasure as he roughly snapped his hips against yours.

He slammed against your cervix like it was the last time he would ever have you, and if he kept this pace up, there was no denying it would be.

You gripped the sheets under you tightly, screaming out as your orgasm started building yet again. “P-Please, my love! I’m so-sorry! Let me come, please!” You pleaded, loud moans and whimpers sneaking their way in between your words. He felt you clench tightly around him and he grunted out a laugh.

“Do you really think it’s that easy? That I’ll just give you what you want? Mmh, no… This is what you get for going against my orders.”

He roughly pulled out of you and pulled his dagger away and gave you a moment to look up at him, your eyes puffy with tears.

He panted, anger very apparent on his face. “Clench your jaw. Now.” He demanded. You knew exactly what was coming…

You did as you were told and shut your jaw tightly. He gently caressed your cheek, making sure you did as you were told, then…

SMACK.

He laid a small, yet sharp and firm slap across your face. Your head threw over to the side from the force and a soft sound between a chuckle and a sob left your lips. You deserved it, you know you did. But you didn’t care. You loved it when he was rough with you.

He snarled and grabbed your face, yanking your head back to look at him. His eyes practically glowed with hunger and anger. He quickly thrusted into you once again, earning him a loud gasp from you.

“Yes, you like this, don’t you? Getting fucked like you’re nothing but a toy? Hm?! Answer me!!” He shouted, laying another slap to your face as he plowed into you, tossing the dagger aside for now. You yelped at the sting and growled back at him, your lust driven mind fully taking over your conscience.

“Yes! Yes, my love! Use me, my body is yours to command!” You yelled back at him. Your words made you clench again, your core burning hot like lava as your orgasm approached yet again. You hoped and prayed your words pleased him enough to let you come.

And it seemed you were correct…

His hips slammed against you even faster, but his movements began to stutter and become uneven. He was getting close.

“Yes, that’s right, my treasure. Come with me, I’ll count us down…”

Your eyes widened as a grin grew on your face. Fucking finally…

You nodded as your moans crescendoed, your head throwing back as he began to count.

“Three…”

His hand snaked down your jaw and wrapped around your throat, pinning you down even further into the mattress as he reached down with his other hand and began to circle ferocious circles against your swollen clit.

“Two…”

Your moans struggled to escape your throat against the pressure he had on it. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as your vision grew blurry. Your thighs shook violently as you clenched even tighter around him, almost as if you wanted to trap him inside of you. Hee moaned out as you clenched, his hips stuttering even more.

“One… Come, my treasure…”

Overwhelming pleasure crashed through your body like a tidal wave as you reached your peak, stars starting to cloud your vision. But then…

You felt a sudden emptiness just as you were about to crash down. He had quickly withdrawn himself from you and he let out a loud groan as he palmed himself and released onto your stomach. You twitched violently beneath him as the fire inside you had been completely snuffed out. He had ruined your orgasm…

He didn’t even grant you the mercy of him filling you with his seed.

Your eyes shot open and your lips parted as he sighed blissfully, wiping some of the mess that was on his hand on your thigh. “You… Wh-...” You were in utter disbelief. He looked down at you, a twinge of disgust in his smirk as he released your neck, getting off the bed and quickly putting his pants back on. Your eyes began to swell with tears as the painful burn of your muscles clouded you. He scoffed at you as he approached the door. He spoke to you from behind his shoulder.

“Don’t act so surprised, my pet. You knew exactly what you were getting yourself into,” He chuckled evilly, watching the tears flow down your cheeks.

“You… You bastard,” You spat, shocking yourself at your own audacity. Thankfully, it seemed as if Astarion had gotten too bored of punishing you for now as he nonchalantly shrugged. “Maybe now you’ll know your place,” He said simply. “Now you are going to stay here until I desire you again, and maybe, just maybe… I’ll forgive you. Though I hardly doubt I will,” He turned back around and walked back over to the edge of the bed, leaning down to you with his hands behind his back.

“After all, I do simply love putting you in your place.” He smiled innocently at you, turning his back once again and heading towards the door.

You glared at him with furious, pleading eyes, still twitching and shuddering.

“I’ll see you later… And you’d best have a good apology for me when I return.”

With that, he left the room and locked the door behind him, leaving you tied to the bed, craving nothing but him. A sob choked out of you as you peered down your body, blood sweat and come mixing together on your stomach.

Between being left like this, a twitching, quivering mess, or being left for dead at the hands of your lover… Right now, you much preferred if he had just put you out of your misery… With the flick of his wrist.

#bg3 #astarion #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 fanfiction #bg3 tav #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #bg3 astarion #baldur’s gate astarion #ascended astarion x tav #ascended astarion #read contents please #dead dove do not eat #knife kink #picquerism #cnc/dubcon #rough #manipulation #impact play/slapping

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crippleprophet · 1 month

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hey, i don't want to put you out or anything, i was just wondering if like off the top of your head if you knew any disability studies articles/books/whatever that center (or even just feature) tic/involuntary movement disorders?

so the answer to this was pretty much no but i spent a bit of time poking around and turned up this 2023 undergraduate honors thesis (link) by a student with tourette’s which seems like a solid starting point for going down the citation rabbit hole!

that piece is “The Embodied Performance of Tics and Tourette Syndrome in the Academic Environment” by Benjamin Allen; i’m only ~1/4th through rn but they argue for a continuum of ticcing + criticize the diagnostic system so i’m comfortable reccing it on that front! the (non-medical) tic-related works cited there are:

Buckser, Andrew. “Before Your Very Eyes: Illness, Agency, and the Management of Tourette Syndrome.” Medical Anthropology Quarterly, vol. 22, no. 2, 2008, pp. 167-192.

Buckser, Andrew. “The Empty Gesture: Tourette Syndrome and the Semantic Dimension of Illness.” Ethnology, vol. 45, no. 4, 2006, pp. 255- 24. https://www.jstor.org/stable/20456601.

Curtis-Wendlandt, Lisa. “Time and the Tic Disorder Triad.” Philosophy, Psychiatry, & Psychology, vol 27, no. 2, 2020, pp. 183-199.

Curtis-Wendlandt, Lisa, and Jack Reynolds. “Why Tourette syndrome research needs philosophical phenomenology.” Phenomenology and the Cognitive Sciences, vol. 20, no. 4, 2021, pp. 573-600.

Miller, James. “The Voice in Tourette Syndrome.” New Literary History, vol. 32 no. 3, 2001, pp. 519-536. Project MUSE, doi:10.1353/nlh.2001.0039.

Trubody, Ben. “Ticced off: An Interpretative Phenomenological Analysis of The Experience of Tourette’s Syndrome.” Journal of the Society for Existential Analysis, vol. 25, no. 2, 2014.

i also searched a handful of disability studies journals for a variety of keywords (movement disorder, tic, tourette’s, involuntary movement, chorea, huntington’s) but didn’t turn up much unfortunately, so all but the first of this next list include someone with tics and/or involuntary movements rather than being about moving involuntarily.

haven’t read these so i can’t speak to the politics / quality (although i’ll make a post if i’m able to read more) but here’s what seemed potentially relevant! also if anything is paywalled please don’t give T&F your money lol, try SciHub or if you can’t find something i can ask around for somebody with institutional access!

Cultural Differences in Reactions to Tics and Tic Severity (2021)

Using virtual reality to implement disability studies’ advocacy principles: uncovering the perspectives of people with disability (2023)

I had every right to be there: discriminatory acts towards young people with disabilities on public transport (2020)

From comedy targets to comedy-makers: disability and comedy in live performance (2015)

From the Case Files: Reconstructing a history of involuntary sterilisation (2010)

i also want to mention “Movements of the Uncontrollable Body Part Two” by Bronwyn Valentine (2019), a creative writing piece about her experiences of embodiment + ableism with spina bifida that i first read pretty soon after it was published & went looking for after developing my movement disorder a year ago because it was so impactful. @fndportal also has some incredibly vital work.

also if you haven’t already read Rosemarie Garland-Thomson’s Staring: Why We Look, it’s not specifically about involuntary movements but definitely a core text for theorizing any visibilized disability.

i hope some of that is helpful!! if anybody checks any of these out i’d love to hear your thoughts/critiques! all the best to you & i hope these offer some resonance with + understanding of your experiences 💓💓

#tics #ticcing #involuntary movements #movement disorder #disability studies #asks #reading lists #movements of the uncontrollable body

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meggie-moo · 9 months

Note

Okay, now it's time for the next level questions ™

So what are your most beloved ships, fellow homestucker?

*passes you the microphone*

MINE ARE SO BASIC, i am a simply girl at my core <3

1. rosemary

I LOVE THEM, i would add so many thoughts, but i truly could ramble about them all day. kanaya finding a game guide, and being like, “i’m going to marry her…” and then actually doing it?? they are so secretly cringe fail, trying *so* hard to seem put together. their first kiss being a SBAHJ reference?? everything about them is iconic

2. davekat

i just think they’re neat :) i also LOVE slowburn idiots in love

3. arasol

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH, like you don’t even know, like they have everything, drama, tragedy?? but then they meet up again in the afterlife?? screaming crying and throwing up

4. roxicallie

THEY ARE JUST SO SO SO SWEET, they deserve the world i love them so much

5. vrisrezi

they are so toxic, but sometimes toxic stories are what you need <33 codependent and falling apart :,) that finally scene of pre-retcon vriska and terezi meeting makes me fall apart

honorable mentions:

dirkuu <- solely because house of dirk made them so funny, like do i truly ship them? no. but it would be funny and that’s enough.

meowrails as moirails obviously, i love them, they are so so sweet. when i first read about them, i thought equius was a weirdo, and nepeta needed to run. but as i kept reading, i realized i was wrong about that 😭

dirkjake, but not really in a shipping sense, but in a “i love the way they are written, but not enough to actually care about their actually relationship way” IF THAT MAKES SENSE. like i’m not sure i actually want them to end up together, but i’m enjoying the drama. they are homestucks version of a toxic main straight couple in a tv show, but instead they are gay

javepeta, they all deserve the world, jade deserves so much love, davesprite deserves to be seen as more than just an “extra dave”, and nepeta deserves to be chosen :,)

solkat pitched is very funny, and i support it

ALSO I FORGOT TO ADD:

PM and wayward vagabond. they are so sweet, and make me cry

there’s definitely more, but of course the top five are ones i genuinely like ship romantically and love, BUT my shipping is made in a way of, “is it fun”

like even if i don’t ship it, i’ll read a fic of it if it’s fun LOL. also if it’s funny, if it’s funny i’ll also support it

what are yours? >:D

#sluggish feline #homestuck #ships #also i color coded them for fun >:)#dirkjake #rosemary #roxicallie #davekat #meowrails #javepeta #arasol #vrisrezi #dirkuu #reading house of dirk ruined me because i’ll see dirkuu and i’m like oh it’s the silly sitcom couple #solkat

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fabianvalencia561 · 2 months

Note

What do the trains in your humanization prefer to eat?

Hmmmm now that's a good question

Well humanoids can literally eat anything they want, heck even garbage if they wanted to. It really depends on the taste for them.

Some humanoids don't really eat, but each humanoid has to eat at least something to keep their "firebox" fuel up!

But I'll tell you guys some of their favorite foods.

hey! Why don't I give you their full names! Because why not and I just feel like it- ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

Thomas, ?????¿? : Grill cheese :] (he'll do anything to eat grilled cheese) but he's not a picky little guy he'll consume anything he wants, the "benefits" of having a rotten core is forever being hungry..... Also he likes oranges (Gordon gets them for him, because he knows how much Thomas likes them.)

Gordon Robert Gresley: He doesn't eat much, but when he does he eats a lot of fruits especially things like apples, plums, and raw pumpkins!

He hates very citrus fruits because of his very sensitive sense of smell, and the citrus really stings and overwhelms him a lot.

Henry William Gresley: Dandelions a lot of Dandelions..... And egg :]

James Laureano Rodríguez Sánchez : Eats whatever he feels like eating. Fun Fact: Don't leave any of your food or your leftovers alone with him, because he'll eat them and if you catch him eating your food he'll look like a shameful dog but keeps eating your food anyway.

Edward Brutus Roman: Tea (any) and Autumn Skullcaps he thinks have a unique taste... Probably because of the poison but oh well he knows anyways

Percy Kipper Goodman: Marshmallows, and this little guy will eat Marshmallows with EVERYTHING.... And I mean everything....

Emily Jay Heart: CHOCOLATE-

Diesel 10 (Dylan Leilani) : forgets to eat a lot of times, but Rosemary. He eats Rosemary's

Diesel Koa Leilani: Jamón, soda bread, and whatever he can eat-

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talonabraxas · 6 months

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Hongos Sagrados. "Cure yourself with the light of the sun and the rays of the moon. With the sound of the river and the waterfall. With the swaying of the sea and the fluttering of birds. Heal yourself with mint, with neem and eucalyptus. Sweeten yourself with lavender, rosemary, and chamomile. Hug yourself with the cocoa bean and a touch of cinnamon. Put love in tea instead of sugar, and take it looking at the stars."

Maria Sabina (via the Santitos) 🍄 Mushroom stones dating from 3000 BC were used in ritual contexts across Mesoamerica and into South America. The majority were found in Guatemala in the highlands or in areas along the intercontinental mountain range which were heavily influenced in Pre-classic times by the Olmec culture. 🍄 The Olmec, Zapotec, Maya, Aztec and Inca all used hallucinogenic mushrooms as a catalyst for spiritual insight, poetry and philosophy. To this day the Mazatec use them ritualistically and primarily to cure illnesses. Additionally, much like the early religions and philosophies of Eurasia and their sacred, mediating substance called Soma (see previous post on Scythians), these transcendental substances were undeniably at the very core of all world religions. 🍄 It is suggested that European ideas of heaven and hell may well derive from the same cult mysteries. Tlaloc, the mayan rain and mushroom god was created by lightening, so was Dionysus; in Greek folklore as in Mazatec, so are all mushrooms - proverbially called ‘flesh of the gods' in both languages. Tlaloc wore a serpent crown, so did Dionysus. Tlaloc has an underwater cave, so did Dionysus… 🍄 What all these cultural links seem to suggest is that entwined within the physical world is a realm concealed to ordinary sight. Just as Maria Sabina claimed that all her poetry was not hers but was given to her by the mushrooms, so too the most ancient living traditions claim that their knowledge is not their own but was handed down to them from much older civilisations - sometimes in the form of pure, non-material consciousness. art by Ventral is Golden

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tallymonster · 4 months

Text

Memories of Us

chapter 13 tonight, tonight

AO3

Masterpost

Thanks to my besties @micropoe10 and @tragedybunny for helping me out with this one. I appreciate the feedback as always my loves 😘

Another huge thanks to @cheesy-cryptid for the love they give this little story.

This particular chapter is heavily influenced by the smashing pumpkins song of the same name.

Tags: @justporo @satanicspinosaurus @sleepy-timaeus @davenswitcher @wayward-hel

13.

Tonight, tonight

No.

No no nonono

What the fuck????

Octavia feels as if the wind has completely been taken out of her whole body. She was absolutely frozen in her seat. The only sound she could hear was the sound of her heart wildly pounding in her throat.

There's no way I heard that right, is there?

Did he just say he was a godsdamned vampire?

His confession startled her to her core. How could she not put two and two together?

Astarion studied her face, the color faded from it, her breath hitches as her mind became absolutely undone. Suddenly, she started quickly rambling.

“Is this why you wear those glasses?! How do you even hide your eye color? What about your fangs? You have those right?” Octavia couldn't stop the words from coming out of her mouth long enough to put her foot in it.

Astarion laughs defensively “Slow down! One question at a time! Yes, that's what the glasses are for. Gale enchanted them to change my eye color, and yes, I have fangs but I use a disguise spell to hide them.”

Hold on…

GALE KNOWS?!

How long has he known about Astarion? Is this what he was talking about when he said Astarion had his “quirks”? That asshole kept this from her this whole time? This was all too much, too new. Her mind begins to scramble as she tries to look for all the missing clues from these past 6 months.

Octavia begins to spiral a little, replaying all the conversations they've had in the half year she's been around him. Astarion’s eyes were as red as the wine they had just drank, is she sure this isn't an alcohol induced dream? Is he going to kill her and drink her blood?

“Octavia? Darling?” She blinks and finds herself still under the blanket with a nervous Astarion.

The subtle signs of his condition are plainly obvious this close, the pallor of death on his skin becoming clearer by the second. The scent on his skin is of rosemary, bergamot, bone dust and wood with a hint of decay.

Her eyes survey every inch of his face. The way his brows are furrowed into a worried stare, his eyes are fully rounded with a pleading look tinged with fear and anxiety. She shakes herself out of her haze, what the fuck was she supposed to say now?

“I don't know what to think..you- you're a vampire?? This is how you're always appearing out of nowhere...it's why you're always “traveling”... This is why you asked to come over after dark..Are you serious??”

Octavia’s voice is low, pensive, and she shook a bit, the realization of their positions hitting her immediately. She straightens up and slides back a little. “How long?” She asks with a twinge of curiosity, her eyes are filled with anticipation and fear.

Astarion takes a deep breath and responds just as quietly “Around 300 years…give or take…” Octavia keeps her eyes on his, “How did you survive? Did you kill anyone?” she asks in quick succession, he could hear her pulse skyrocket.

Astarion answers, slightly taken aback at her bluntness, “No, I didn't kill anyone, I ate animal blood to survive. I haven't had any blood from anyone in a very long time. Only ever from one person, but they're long gone. They were my only one.” She could see the heartbreak in his face, hear it in his voice, and feel it in his hand squeezing down on hers.

“Astarion…” she speaks softly, she catches herself as he lets out a shaky breath. “I’m sorry, I didn't mean to..” she plays with the blanket, trying to calm herself down.

“It’s fine, darling.” Astarion begins, “Actually, you're reacting a lot better than I expected. You aren't even a little scared, very inquisitive in fact? Usually people aren't too keen on having a vampire in their home, under a blanket, holding hands in a very intimate position.”

Octavia shifts her legs, “Oh, I am one hundred percent terrified. You do prove a good point though, you could absolutely kill me, but I don't think you will. I don't get that feeling from you. I mean you did just spill your guts to me emotionally. A wounded soul, possibly, but a killer or a monster? I don't think so. Unless you're going to kill me right now?”

Octavia swallows the bubble in her throat, “Don't forget, you asked me to trust you that night after the fundraiser, I don't see why I should stop now. I mean it's probably a terrible idea that will come back to haunt me isn't it?” She laughs with a small huff.

“You know, you remind me of them, the last person that trusted me like this. Same terrible decision making.” Astarion’s voice is hesitant, veiled by a thin defensiveness. “I hope I can trust myself this time. I would hate to lose you. I can't explain it, but you feel nostalgic to me. It's like we’ve been here before.” He presses his forehead to hers, looking back into her eyes.

Octavia wraps her arms around his neck and pulls him into a hug. He tenses up for a second, then melts into her touch. He runs his hands up her back, pressing her chest into his. His head rested on the crook of her neck, inhaling her sweet flowery perfume. They embrace in silence, the crackling of the fireplace far off in the distance.

After a few moments, Octavia pulls away from him. She’s still scared and doesn't want him to sense it, so she places her hand on his cheek and for the first time ever, she notices the puncture marks on his neck.

She swallows and clears her throat. “Can I ask you one more thing? I mean…if it's okay obviously?” Astarion nods, lowering his hands to her hips. “How were you turned? What did it feel like to die?” she catches herself again and grimaces.

“That's two questions, sweetheart.” Astarion states quietly with his guard up, he takes his hands off her and places them in his lap. Octavia can feel the embarrassment coming from him, and immediately backtracks “I'm sorry, I was genuinely curious. Forget I said anything.”

Astarion shakes his head and laughs softly, “Octavia, give me a minute. Please? I want to answer you, but you have to let me think for a moment, darling.” He takes a deep breath and throws his head back on the backrest of the couch.

“I was a magistrate back when I was alive. I did something a group of people didn't like. They beat the shit out of me and left me to die. Then, this…fucking piece of shit…” Astarion’s voice trembles and Octavia sees the fury build in his eyes, stuck between comforting him and allowing him to continue. She picks the latter.

Octavia shakes her head and pulls him close to her into a tight hug. “You don't have to keep going if you don't want to.” Astarion feels the same way he felt when he explained all this to Tav, the anger at the situation that both robbed him of his previous life and given him the chance to sit here with Octavia.

Astarion held her in his arms for a few minutes before pulling away and speaking. “I’d like to finish if you don't mind. I'd rather just get this over with all at once to be perfectly honest.” He sighs deeply and speaks.

“Anyway, long story short, I got turned into a vampire by a slaver, kept hidden away and then when he died I uh…I was free in a way. Mostly free to explore the world, meet people…make friends…” he leaves out the most important details of course, his voice trails off for a moment before he clears his throat and continues.

“Fall in love…but all of those people and events have passed me by. I’ve been alone for around 150 years. More or less.” Astarion finishes, the air around them felt heavy and morose. They sit in the stillness of the house, the fire’s crackling punctuating the turmoil he feels inside.

Eventually, Octavia breaks, “Last one and I swear I'm done.” Her quiet voice cut through his sorrow, but her curiosity was clearly out of concern and genuine affection. So Astarion pushes through and allows her to ask, grimacing as he lays back on the couch. “Fine, but can we please be done after this?”

“Yes, we can. I promise this is it, and this one is more just me wondering, honestly. Can you eat food? I mean you just sat here and ate dinner…you aren't actually full right? Is that something I need to worry about before you kill me?” Octavia fiddles with her fingers anxiously.

Astarion on the other hand has a full frown on his face. His eyes are wide, nostrils flared, and brows furrowed into a clearly irritated expression. Octavia has absolutely fucked up. She gulps and prays she didn't just say the worst possible thing she could have.

“Did no one ever teach you to count properly? That was three questions. Actually, I have one of my own. Do you have stronger wine? Perhaps you can mix some wyrm toxin in it for me to drink?” He folds his arms in annoyance and sinks into the couch.

“Well, to answer your three questions.” He shoots an extremely pointed look, “Yes, I can eat food. Doesn't taste like anything and I usually do it to blend into crowds and not rouse suspicion onto myself. No, I’m not full and NO, I am not going to kill you.” He hisses out the final part and sulks more.

Octavia couldn't stop herself from asking even though it was a stupid idea and he would probably say no.

“Do you want to drink my blood?”

Astarion stares at Octavia with wide eyes, the thought had crossed his mind on a few occasions. Particularly, after their first kiss when he felt her pulse spike. He wasn't sure if the heat he suddenly felt in his cheeks was from the fireplace, the blanket, or her suggestion.

He definitely felt his mouth begin to water, though. The thought of her neck under his tongue was enough to fluster him, he stammers back an answer to distract from the invasive thoughts that immediately flooded his mind.

“I- I uh,” he gulps, finding that he's suddenly at a loss for words. The hunger and confusion are battling in his head, was she being serious right now? “Are you fucking with me? Are you really offering to let me drink your blood? Weren't you just asking if I was going to kill you? Sudden change of heart, dear?”

Octavia honestly had no way to properly answer that. She mostly just wanted to help, so she tells the truth. “I hate the thought of you starving yourself. I don't want you to do that. I…I want to help you. Besides, I’m old enough to make my own decisions. Whether or not they're terrible and get me killed, well, I guess that's the risk I'm willing to take tonight.”

Anything to distract you from my own secrets.

“Will it hurt? If I..offer?” She says the last word with a tremble, biting her lip. Astarion sits up, letting the blanket slide down his shoulders and gather around his waist. The conversation is taking a strange turn, no doubt, but he doesn't want to make it seem like he's too eager. “You don't have to, I can hunt an animal later. I'll make it work, Octavia, I always have.”

Octavia's face immediately begins to flush, obviously he would say no, but tonight is apparently the night to keep making terrible choices. “But…. I'm here now and I want to help you.” she swallows the shivering breath caught in her throat. Why does it suddenly feel so hot in the room?

Astarion’s mind begins to race, this is definitely not where he thought this night would go. He felt like had control of himself most times but this was testing those limits.

“Octavia…” his voice is low and cautious, “are you positive about this? Once I do this..” He drops his gaze to her neck, she could see him gulping. “I don't think we can go back to how we were.”

The atmosphere in the room was quickly becoming thick and intimate, Octavia was falling into its enticing web. She felt her blood pressure going through the roof, the voice inside was shouting at her:

Do it! Do it! DO IT!

“I’ll do it.” Octavia speaks quickly, her words sounded faint and fuzzy. Her own voice echoes in the back of her mind. “I mean it, I want to help you.” She pulls her hair back behind her, exposing her neck. Astarion breathes in sharply, his lungs felt like they would rupture from the sudden expansion.

“Wait!” He places a hand on her wrist, pulling it towards himself slowly. “It'll hurt quite a bit if I do it on your neck. Wrist would be much more comfortable…” Astarion clears his throat to try to hide that he was somewhat lying, he just couldn't bite her neck yet.

It would be too much, too soon. He would have to ease them both into this before he took it too far.

“Uhh…sure, you're the expert, I guess.” Octavia is silently thanking all the Gods that he chose not to bite her neck. She doesn't think she could handle him on her neck, it was way too intimate, the idea made her stomach drop.

Astarion holds her wrist up to his lips, Octavia shudders a bit when she feels his breath on her skin. “Take a deep breath okay? This won't hurt a lot, but it'll still feel slightly uncomfortable. Just relax, and it’ll be over before you know it.”

Octavia nods and prepares herself. Suddenly, he bites into her wrist, a sharp pain eased by a dull ache. She feels the rush of her blood flowing between them, then the icy chill of his tongue lapping at it. Her heart pumps wildly as he coaxes the liquid into his mouth.

He holds her arm tightly as he drinks from her. Octavia feels her whole body heat up as she watches his lips pucker up as he latches onto her veins. His skin started to look more flushed as he continued to feed off her.

To Astarion, her blood was pure sunshine, it tasted like the sweetest berries mixed in exquisite liquor. A luxurious indulgence after over a century of thirst. He couldn't help the greediness that followed that first drop, he needed more, he was trapped in her flavor, one that feels like it's been on his tongue before.

She watches him silently, her heart racing harder. She began to feel a bit light headed, the way his lips looked around her wrist shot little pricks of excitement into her.

Octavia was losing the battle in her head, she found this whole thing strangely arousing? Definitely not the feeling she was expecting. She had to look away, why was this happening to her?

Oh Gods, was he always this hot?

Why does this feel so good??

Am I getting turned on by this?!

Astarion is distracted by the warmth of her blood running through his veins. He opens his eyes and notices the way her skin is flushed. His gaze continues up to her face and he sees her in the middle of her own world.

Octavia’s lips are parted, head thrown back with her eyes closed. She looks absolutely delicious. He's lost in the bliss of feeding on her when he hears her soft moans.

“Oh, fuck…”

Wait….did I say that out loud????

Octavia's eyes shoot open and her head turns down to Astarion. Her breath is ripped out from her lungs by the way she notices Astarion looking at her. His eyes were even darker now that the blood had settled in his veins.

Astarion slowly stops sucking on her wrist, releasing it with a gentle kiss. He keeps his eyes locked onto hers as he continues to kiss up her arm. She bites down on her lip, sensing the change in his mood.

They're both breathing heavily, the air becomes incredibly thick. Astarion can't help the increasing need to kiss her. Octavia gets the sense that she's just become his prey, a little snack for a starving hunter.

His eyes become cat-like and slanted. She felt like he was about to devour her from the way he licked her blood off his lips.They kept staring at each other for a few moments, neither wanting to be the first to react.

The tension finally breaks as they lunge forward, crashing their lips together.

#bg3 #astarion #baldur's gate 3 #astarion ancunin #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 astarion #astarion bg3 #gale of waterdeep #fic: memories of us #gale dekarios #one day ill make that masterlist but not today lol #astarion x oc

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angeiisa · 5 months

Text

Perona Headcanons

Modern AU!

SANRIO GIRL! She loves collecting any & all Sanrio plushies, her favourite being Kuromi & MyMelody. Her bed is full of them & I strongly believe she's one of those people who will scold you if you move or knock down her stuffed toys.

She is also a figurine collector and has many rare Monster high dolls on display, Draculaura is her favourite.

Watches anime such as "Madoka Magica", "Nana" "Evangelion" & "Death Note". Speaking of Death note she moulded her personality after Misa Amane when she was 13 & bought clothes to match. Robin probably sees her reading something gory & Perona gets her into "Junji Ito".

As a kid she played games she shouldn't have, much like "DDLC", "Yandere Simulator" & "FNAF". Probably stayed up late watching "Silent Hill" & "Resident Evil" gameplays.

She also watches true crime videos & her favourite YouTuber is "Baliey Sarian", she enjoys that there's also a makeup aspect to the videos.

Loves horror movies, especially paranormal ones. "Poltergeist" "The Shining" & "Conjuring" are her favourites. When "The Nun" came out she made everyone watch it, Ussop cried.

Absolutely has a Quija board & makes guests summon ghosts with her, Ussop cried again.

Mihawk is her dad! Zoro is her brother! It's canon to me, I love the gothic family. Mihawk knew she loved ghosts as a kid so for Halloween he cut some holes into a bedsheet & made that her costume... at least he tried. On that note, Perona enjoys cosplaying her favourite characters casually & is on forums for her fandoms. She definitely scourers Reddit & Twitter & very often gets into arguments.

She loves blasting music which irritates Zoro to no end primarily when he's working out. Very frequently he will barge into her room telling her to turn it down (She does not).

Of course a night-core listener. Most liked artists are “Lady Gaga”, “Melanie Martinez”, “Poppy”, “Jazmin Bean” & “MARINA”.

Halloween queen! Always hosting multiple Halloween parties throughout October & a Seance on the actual day. These get-togethers consist of scary movies, excessive haunted decoration, although that's up all year long, spooky stories & fall snacks. She is a sucker for a pumpkin spice latte.

Her room smells like rosemary & she has candles everywhere.

Hated “Ghost Busters” because she didn’t think it was fair to the ghosts. Very into Scooby Doo as a kid & would make Zoro play it with her, he was the dog.

#perona #perona hcs #one piece #luffy #zoro #strawhats #perona head canon #one piece head canon #mihawk #op #one piece hc #robin #ussop #nami

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femnoire · 6 months

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Hair Care (tw:ed)

I've seen a lot of people worried about hair loss due to restricting. I definitely started to notice more shedding so I wanted to share some of my tips that helped me.

(Keep in mind that I already have naturally thick and long wavy hair, so what works for me might not necessarily work for you!)

1.) Food

PROTEIN. Protein is important for so many things, including keeping your hair healthy. The recommendation is 0.8g per kg of body weight. For me, I try to get at least 50-60 grams of protein per day. I know it can be a little hard sometimes. One of my favorite ways to get in enough protein a day is protein drinks! They can be relatively low cal with 20-40 grams and very filling. My favorite right now is the Fairlife Core Power, which is 26g of protein for 170 calories. Not to mention they taste very good.

Another easy relatively low-calorie way to get in protein is Greek yogurt! If you want a really low-calorie option, I recommend Dannon light and fit Greek yogurt! 80 calories for 12g of protein! They have a vast array of flavors, but here are my personal favorites:

If you can afford a higher-calorie option I would also recommend the Chobani flips. These are about 9-10g of protein for 150-170 calories. Not as much protein for a higher amount of calories, but if you are craving dessert, these work really well and are very satisfying! Once again they also come in a vast array of flavors, but I will show my favorites:

Nutrition. I know it's hard but eating a balanced diet is also the key to keeping your hair as healthy as possible while restricting. Some foods that I include regularly that may help hair growth/hair health are:

Spinach (2 cups are worth ~25 cal)

Eggs (One egg is 70-90 cal)

Salmon (or any fatty fish) I personally like to get the Bumble Bee Smoked Flavored Coho Salmon ( 150 cals, also 19g of protein) It is a little high cal but this is something that I think is worth the cal spending

Avocado. It can be expensive to buy avocados and a lot of times when you open an avocado it can be bad on the inside. What I like to do is buy the WHOLLY Avocado minis. They are just straight avocados in little mini cups. (1 cup is 130 calories) once again a higher calorie food but something that is worth the cal spending. I have a wrap recipe that I use these for if anyone wants me to post it!

Beans. One of my favorite beans to use is Great Northern Beans. I have a recipe using these beans in a delicious and low-calorie soup if anyone wants me to post it!

2.) Vitamins

You may be eating a balanced diet, but if you are restricting then you will not get enough vitamins and micronutrients. This is where I would recommend taking vitamins. I Personally take a multivitamin as well as a Hair, Skin, and Nails vitamin daily. I take the Centrum Adult Multivitamin and the Vitafusion Hair Skin and Nails Vitamin:

3.) Rosemary oil/water.

I like to use rosemary oil on my scalp followed by a five-minute scalp massage/combing with a bamboo brush every three days. I have naturally thicker and coarse hair, so my hair can take rosemary oil, but if you have thinner hair, I have read that rosemary oil can be too much, and you would need to use rosemary water. It's very easy to make, just google it! If you use rosemary oil, do not saturate your scalp with it! You only need a few drops to do the trick. It's also not recommended to put straight rosemary oil on the scalp, instead to dilute it in another carrier oil. This is the brand of rosemary oil I use:

This is the bamboo brush I use, I got it from Amazon:

Bamboo brushes are said to reduce breakage, reduce frizz, and aid in scalp care, aid in circulation, and hair growth. I personally have noticed my hair looking a lot healthier after switching to one.

I think that is about all the tips I have for right now. Remember I am not a doctor, hair specialist, or anything like that. These are simply some things that I do, and I have noticed that they have helped decrease hair fallout.

Remember that the best course of action is recovery, but if it is not an option for you then I understand.

I hope some of this helps and please stay safe!

#tw ana diary #@na motivation #tw ed diet #@n@ tips #@nor3xia #@tw edd #@ana #@na vent #an@recia #@nor3×14 #anarecik #tw ana shit #anorexcya

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zwy01 · 2 months

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Blood Moon AU!! Part 2 - More werewolves

Second part (continued) of my second major AU, Blood Moon AU. The nobles and werewolves basically have a race swap in an almost brand new setting.

For more info, check out my first two posts where I explained the general lore and setting of this AU (highly recommended for a better understanding):

The characters.

Ladybug: Father of Cloudy, whom he had with an unnamed werewolf woman. Many people mistake Ladybug for a dangerous, evil person due to his creepy appearance, but he’s actually a pretty nice dude. The sockets of his eyes are just very deep and people can’t seem to catch a glimpse of his irises no matter how hard they look, hence the assumption that he’s about to suck every passerby’s soul and transfer them to himself to extend his lifespan. Doesn’t help that he’s always smiling. It almost looks like he’s sneering. Ladybug doesn’t mind. He’s too old for this shit. He’d just chuckle and go along with it. He’d strike a menacing pose and bare his fangs, and they’d all run away screaming. Haha, that was fun. Felt great, might do it again.

No one knows how old Ladybug is. It seems like he’s been around since forever ago. The werewolves even call him a living fossil. He takes it as a compliment because it means he’s wise and timeless. Ladybug would be minding his own business and he’d happen to eavesdrop on some werewolves talking about an old story, and he’d spook them by appearing from behind a bush and saying “Oh? Didn’t know the things I did in my youth are being told as Mother Moon’s tales now. Care to recite from the beginning for this old man?” Once again they run away in terror. Oh, poo. Tsk tsk, young pups these days are so sensitive and can’t stand humor at all. At least his daughter understands him and fully embraces his weirdness.

Ladybug lives with his daughter Cloudy, whom he had as an old man. Cloudy’s mother is alive and well; she just doesn’t live with them. Ladybug raised Cloudy for the most part, who is very attached to him. As a retired warrior, Ladybug does farming as a hobby and grows a variety of delicious crops because Cloudy doesn’t eat meat. He breeds special types of vegetables, fruits, and grains for her to enjoy. Currently, his goal is to create the perfect crunchy, tangy sweet berry because his daughter likes those very much. He can’t wait to bake a delicious pie for her with these ingredients and see her smile.

Ladybug’s favorite color is green because his daughter’s eyes are green. It’s also the hair color of his daughter’s mother, who was his lover.

Ladybug is not your typical werewolf warrior. He is also a master of magic, and you can always count on him to know the specific spell to your specific issue if you need help from him. He can both harm and help you, if he chooses to. There’s probably even a proverb that says “if you get fleas up your buttcrack on a full moon night, Ladybug will hunt you down and cook you in a stew” or something. Yikes. Probably made up anyway. Eh, still giving it some credit because it’s a good way to scare the kids and get them to quiet down and go to bed without making a fuss. Lord Peach’s adopted daughter Rosemary is a student and fan of Ladybug. She calls him “Teacher Buggy”. He is extra nice to her because she is part of Cloudy’s core friend group and his daughter always talks about how nice “Rosie” is. Usually, he would reject those who come to him asking for magic lessons, but he gives private lessons to Rosemary. Dang, she must’ve bribed him, lol. Thanks to Rosemary, Ladybug has learned about a certain noble streamer named Zivon Tradio aka “GlitterDream KittyPaws”, who is also a magician. Ladybug isn’t his fan, but he sometimes watches his streams just to criticize his spells. Rosemary thinks it’s hilarious.

Ladybug has no other living relatives aside from his daughter.

Grub: Son of unnamed werewolves. Unlike Ladybug, who just seems creepy but really isn’t, Grub is creepy to the core. It’s just him being… him. 100% original Grub guaranteed. He’s either lying still with his face planted to the ground and mumbling to himself, which can last for hours, or he’s hyper and jumping from tree to tree and finally off a cliff. Once he even tried to dive into an active volcano. There’s rarely any in betweens. It’s okay if he gets hurt, he’ll heal up in no time. It even feels good to get hurt. Fractures, burns, external and internal bleeding, almost-decapitation… he has a new to-do list everyday. He’ll even feel itchy on the inside if he doesn’t let himself bleed every now and then. That’s what the werewolves’ superior healing is for, and he’s totally abusing this ability. He would just shrug it off when people point out to him that he’s basically addicted to self-harm. It’s just called having fun! He would then cackle and squeal and bark back and forth on a crescendo and decrescendo like a total maniac. The werewolves would just assume that he’s under Ladybug’s curse or something, because he clearly isn’t in his right mind. Oh well, it’s not like they have to be friends with him. And who knows if it’s contagious or not, so better leave quickly to be safe than sorry.

Grub’s current self has something to do with his childhood. He was born into a big family, as his parents had many children back to back, litter after litter. He’s just one of the dozens of children. Grub is a quintuplet and the runt of his litter. Initially, his parents wanted to abandon him, as it would’ve been a waste to feed him since he would just die anyway. But little Grub cried and squeaked and howled for milk, as if he didn’t know what giving up was. Then his parents changed their mind. Perhaps they ended up giving him a chance because they were entertained. Sure, they’ll be generous this one time and see how things turn out. If he dies, they’ll just eat him. They even named him Grub out of spite; crawling on the floor on his hands and knees and struggling for life just like a grub. Befitting of such a weak, unimpressive pup.

Grub was strong. He was resilient despite his circumstances. He managed to survive, but his growth is permanently stunted to this day. His childhood was less than ideal. When it was meal time, his parents left little to no prey for him, and he could only watch his brothers and sisters wolf down their dinner because he was too small and weak to even fight for the scraps. He filled his belly by gnawing on bones and whatever had been left over after his family had their share. He learned to break bones and suck on the marrow. Sometimes he’d crush and eat the bones too when he got desperate. Other than that, he’d stuff himself with dried grass, snow, and even dirt in order to stave off hunger. This is why Grub is short and small even in adulthood. Sure, he’s lean and compact, as he’s been eating well ever since he left his hell of a family and taught himself how to hunt, but his height is stuck at where it is now. He’s just a smidge taller than what would be considered a short werewolf woman. Perhaps the lack of nourishment during his vital childhood days had also done something to his brain. Either that, or he was born creepy. Or both. The werewolves are scared of him, but they also pity him. He didn’t choose to become like this anyway. Grub taking extreme measures to hurt himself is probably just his way of coping.

Grub is a warrior, but he isn’t allowed to spar without having many other warriors chaperoning the battleground because Grub doesn’t spar to train. He fights to kill. He disrespects the protocol and has no sense of honor, and won’t stop even when his sparring partner has yielded. There was a time when the warriors had to collectively restrain Grub and pry his fangs off the neck of his sparring partner whom he had defeated in a duel, because he just wouldn’t let go. He wanted to draw blood. More blood. Even more blood. To him, he’s not done until he crushes his opponent’s throat. To this day, the incident’s witnesses haven’t forgotten about all the bleeding and crying and the gruesome screams that had echoed throughout the mountains. Grub’s victim had retired from fighting ever since and went into hiding. And Grub? He never apologized.

Grub doesn’t really have any hobbies other than thrill seeking and self-harming. Maybe he just hasn’t discovered anything yet. Well, he should apply for a job as a communal alarm clock because you can always bet that he’d be screaming and howling by 4:00 am sharp. Even Mother Moon needs her beauty sleep. Grub disagrees.

Grub doesn’t have a crush on anyone as of now. Some werewolves doubt his ability to even recognize members of his pack as his own kind. Can he even see them that way? Hard to say. Grub isn’t dumb in the slightest, he’s just crazy... good for him, then.

Thank you for reading and stay tuned for future posts!

#kori’s blood moon au #noblesse #manhwa #myart #fanart #lagus tradio #gradeus

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wangxianficfinder · 1 year

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Fic Finder

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1. Not sure if this is ff or itmf, because there is a specific fic I lost, but also just want a general trope. I'm looking for fics where WWX's resentful energy is into/gentle with LWJ, and LWJ welcomes it, like allowed it to touch him, touches back, maybe they use it during sex. It doesn't have to be right away, just him eventually accepting that the resentful energy is an extension of WWX. (Particularly looking for a post 13/16 year fic with this idea and WWX being shocked over how unbothered LWJ is about it, bc he still thinks LWJ hates him. Also something to do with LWJ's scars and the energy making the not hurt? Idk feel free to split this into two asks!)

FOUND? the described story sounds like the anteroom of golden age by everythingispoetry (M, 92k, wangxian, canon divergence, disability, recovery, mental health issues, grief/mourning, hurt/comfort, families of choice, developing relationship) where resentful energy m akes LWJ's scars hurt less, though it's only one event towards the end of a long story which is itself the last of a series!

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2. hello i hope you all are doing great! im looking for a fic where jgy's crimes were exposed in a discussion conference i think. and he was trying to tell jc about the golden core transfer to keep the spotlight off himself but jc already knew and he told the conference himself. im trying to remember the plot but alas. thank you for all you do it's very appreciated ♥️♥️♥️

FOUND! A Narrow Bridge by FrameofMind, Jo Lasalle (Jo_Lasalle) (E, 700k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Canon Divergence, Slow Burn, Getting Together, First Time, Pining while fucking, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Angst with a Happy Ending, CQL Verse, almost everybody lives/almost nobody dies, epistolary-ish, canon-ish side pairings, radishes) sounds like it could be narrow bridge. Wei Ying doesn't want to tell JC but Lan Zhan insists and they argue about it. If that sounds familiar? It happens very far into the fic.

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3. A) Hello! Looking for this fic: Just before he dies, Wei Ying sees Lan Zhan being severely injured (really bad wound through the chest). When he resurrects later on, he's certain that Lan Zhan is dead, and he's pissed about it. But Lan Zhan isnt dead, and they find each other. Its a darkish fic with wangxian being quite in love but kind of a murder couple. Lan Xichen is kinda bad here. Meng Yao gets his head chopped off. I cant find it anywhere, it might've been deleted... Help? 😳

B) Looking for this fic: It happens during the Burial Mounds settlement days. Lan Zhan comes to visit. Someone attacks Wei Ying with a spell but Lan Zhan protects him and is hit instead. It starts de-aging him little by little (mentally not physically), taking back a few years at a time. (I think every time he sleeps he loses more years...) Wei Ying takes him back into the settlement as he tries to cure him. Lan Xichen joins them at some point... I can't find it! 😢 @dreammaiden21

3A)

FOUND? you soothe me just to torture me again 🔒 by PrismaticAvocado (M, 4k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Dark WWX, Dark LWJ, Dark LSZ, Dark LXC, Dark LQR, jc is honestly not that much darker than in canon if at all, Murder Husbands, Torture, Homophobia, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, almost everyone is bashed somewhat except for wangxian and a-yuan be warned, JC Bashing, WWX Lives, BAMF WWX)

3B)

FOUND! Rosemary and Thyme by The Silverfish (ZephyrAndTheSilverfish) (T, 45k, wangxian, burial mounds settlement days, memory loss, talismans, hurt/comfort, angst w happy ending, fix-it, recovery, panic attacks, fluff)

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4. Hello, I'm looking for a fic where Lan Wangji raises the Lan disciples to express their emotions healthily. I remember it ends after WWX's resurrection with Lan Wangji crying really hard.

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5. hello dear mods im in need of your help again. im looking for a fic where wwx finds his uncles who are his father's brothers, also apparently he comes from a rich family. he's already married to lwj iirc by this time iirc. i can't recall the plot so idk what tag to search or what compilation it's in 😭😭 thank you very much for all you do

hey im 5 on the latest fic finder. sorry but i don't think that's it im pretty sure it's a finished fic. also wwx meets his paternal grandmother but she has dementia iirc. thanks for the suggestion tho

hey #5 again sorry again but that's still not it. T_T the wei clan isn't a cultivator family but a merchant family so wcz was actually rich before becoming a cultivator iirc. and when wwx's uncles found out what happened to wwx they withdrew their business in lanling. also idk if i remember it right but it seemed part of a series? thank you for your efforts i also liked the fics you suggested anyway so it's still a win

NOT FOUND! 🧡 Stunted, Starving Juvenility by TomatenMark (E, 548k, WangXian, WIP, Fix-it of sorts, Talisman master WWX, Not JFM Friendly, Study Arc, Getting together, Fluff and Angst, Engagement)

NOT FOUND! places under the sky by narie (T, 17k, WangXian, Background Relationships, Canonical Character Death, Family, Found Family, literally but also metaphorically, Funerary Rites, Post-Canon, Family Dynamics, Grief/Mourning)

FOUND! Keep Holding On by abCEE (M, 316k, JC & WWX & JYL, wangxian, canon divergence, role reversal, YLLZ JYL, yunmeng sibling dynamics, good uncle LQR, sunshot campaign, PTSD, established relationship, angst w/ happy ending) wei ying's dad comes from merchants family. He and Lan Zhan and a-yuan visit them. That part was somewhere in the middle of the fic / I don'r remember the specific chapter (i think around 35/36)

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6. Hey there, I'm searching for a wangxian fiction on ao3.... but unfortunately, I don't remember much of it. All that i know is that it is a long fic and that Wei Ying is not hated by the Cultivation world. Wei Ying also gets a title, which is similar to Lan Zhans. It was like the Light Bearer (obviously LZ) and his Light Source (that's the title WY got). Also, they got their happy ending (and I think WYs' relationship to Jiang Cheng was not good at the sunshot campaign :/ ?). Thanks in advance :D

FOUND? I'm Going Out (Gonna Make A Name For Me And You) by cosmicmilktea (T, 16k, wangxian, post-canon, chief cultivator LWJ, Mentor WWX, intersect relations, slow burn, sickness)

FOUND? Light Source by abCEE (M, 31k, wangxian, canon divergence, not Jiang friendly, fall of lotus pier, no golden core transfer, sunshot campaign, established relationship, canon-typical violence, medical inaccuracies, no demonic cultivation, accidental baby acquisition)

FOUND? Light of Stars (and the Destroyer) by Sanguis (T, 22k, WangXian, Legends, Arranged Marriage, Pining for your spouse, Adoption, Canon Divergence, Married Couple)

FOUND? 🧡 the river brought you here by chilianxianzi (Not Rated, 11k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, POV Outsider, Amnesia, Past abuse, Strangulation, Found Family) I think the fic is - The River Brought You Here. (Feng Huo, Beacon)

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7. Hello! I'm hoping you and all your lovely followers can help me, but I think the fic I'm looking for has been deleted.

The title was something like Happiness is peeing your pants, and the author something like wwx_sparkles, but I don't think I'm spelling the author's name correctly. The fic was about Emperor!LWJ and guard!WWX, who drank too much the night before, and needs to borrow the emperor's chamber pot. Sexy times ensue.

If anyone knows the fic or the author, or has a copy, I'd be very grateful! Thanks for all your hard work, this blog is a treasure ♥️

I’ve got bad news for you; w_wxsparkles has left the fandom, deleted their AO3 account, and emptied their Twitter. If you persevere, that story (and you got the title right) is available on the Wayback Machine.

the work number was #28129026. https://archiveofourown.org/works/28129026

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8. Hi! I'm looking for an Ao3 one shot that takes place after wwx's death. It's about how Jiang wanyin and lan wangji need to stay away from each other during conferences. It all started when jiang wanyin made a comment about lan wangji's robes saying he looks like he's mourning his wife. And it set off lan wangji and he seriously aimed to hurt jiang wanyin for that comment. I remember he swung at a pillar and collapsed it. He only stopped because Lan shizui called out to him. TYIA!

FOUND! Better than a Mouthful of Blood by mondengel (T, 1k, gen) and it is locked to archive accounts

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9. I watched wangxian toxic lover FF video in YouTube I want read this ff please can you search the ff story I'm try find this story but never find it's request please can you find

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10. Hi! Thank you for all your help in finding all these good fics! I've found so many excellent stories based on your recs and findings ❤️ If it's not too much trouble, could you please find a fic in which wei ying was faking his orgasms and lan zhan found out bcs he walked in on wei ying? Thank you

NOT FOUND! Wei Wuxian’s Shameless revenge, a Tumblr comic by @pakhnokh, elaborated in The Sweetest Morsel to the Mouth That Ever Was Cooked in Hell by Silvarbelle (E, 14k, wangxian, Mojo’s post)

NOT FOUND! Lie Back and Think of Yunmeng by sophie_448 (E, 8k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Observed Consummation, Dubious Consent, Public Sex, Exhibitionism, A/B/O Dynamics, Boypussy, Vaginal Sex, ambiguous historical fantasy setting, referenced Wei Ying/others for ~educational purposes, Faked orgasms, chastity examination)

FOUND! if there ever was a perfect couple this one qualifies by wildwestwind (E, 4k, wangxian, F/M, gender changes, smut, anorgasmia, rope bondage, consensual non-con, gentle dom LWJ, lack of communication, fluff) this is maybe left field since it is a m/f fic but the description reminded me a lot of this one

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11. Do you know the title of a fic where Wei Ying changes into a woman due to a pill he took from a black dog that was frozen in an array. It took him back in time and he decided to help the sunshot compaign from the sideline so no one knew of the demonic cultivator. He runs into lan Zhan who realizes it’s Wei Ying and follows after him. Wei Ying claims ayuan as his son. I’ve read it before but have lost it. Thank you in advance for any help! @minniemickey1987

FOUND? 今非昔比 Jīn fēi xī bǐ by XieJianRou (Not rated, 119k, wangxian, time travel fix-it, fem WWX)

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12. Here am I bothering you guys again, lol. I'm looking for a fic that takes place in a world where people are decided as doms and subs. I think that Lwj was a dom and Wwx a sub. Wwx is having a sub drop at the burial mounds, so Wq sends a letter to Lwj so he can go help get Wwx out of the dropping. Some misunderstanding happens, and it ends with Lwj having a dom drop, but wwx doesn't notice and sends Lwj away, but Wq noticed Lwj was dropping, and when she found out Wwx sent him away, she scolded Wwx and told him to go find Lwj before something bad happened with him.

FOUND? A Gesture of Companionship by Khashana (E, 5k, wangxian, bdsm au, burial mounds settlement days, dub con, spanking, scratching, no lube, inappropriate use of gusu lan ribbon, sex pollen vibes, fuck or severe consequences, going nonverbal, sub drop, top drop, angst w happy ending)

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13. I have completely lost track of a fic, and I hope you guys can find it for me since I have given up. So it was a War prize wangji fic, though I don't remember if it was tagged that or not. It was actually primarily in LXC's pov. Everyone was at a conference in Lanling, and LXC had heard a bunch of horrible rumors about what LWJ was supposedly suffering, but then wangxian came in looking swag af, and LXC kept checking over and staring at LWJ to assuage himself of the worry when LWJ looked fine. Then there was a bit where NMJ got sat at the table with them in a Jin attempt to provoke him or WWX into trouble, and it failed. Then there was a break, and everyone went shopping, and WWX kept going on and on about LWJ and everyone by the end of it realized WWX was a dork and stupid in love with LWJ. I think this was multi chapter? But that's everything I can remember.

Thank again for your help!

Asker from 13 on ff, it is not Love, in fire and blood. Like I said, the fic was entirely from LXC's pov and at no point did it switch to or from that. It also entirely takes place at a banquet. Other scenes I remember is that when LWJ and WWX appeared, LWJ was described to have a long train on his coat, later during the banquet LXC makes note that LWJ is eating some chicken that WWX had put on his plate and that LWJ's cheeks look chubby since he'd last seen him. WWX had also never met NMJ before.

I don't remember if it was a long one shot or a chaptered fic, but if it was chaptered it wasn't very many, like 4 or 5.

NOT FOUND! love, in fire and blood by cicer (E, 360k, wangxian, Bottom LWJ, Arranged Marriage, political scheming, Gratuitous Domesticity, Mutual Pining, EXTREME SLOWBURN, Bottom LWJ) might be "Love, In Fire And Blood" It is a war prize au and when wangxian re-enter society they are both dressed to the nines (LWJ notably not wearing his Lan whites) and there is a focus on Xichen being worried for his brother. But the whole fic is not from Xichen's perspective.

FOUND! Cessation by devinokaze (T, 6k, wangxian, canon divergence, YLLZ WWX, fluff, LXC pov)

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14. Hello fic finder, I don't know if you are still finding fics but i've been trying to find a wangxian fic where wei wuxian was raised by his mother cangse sanren and sends a letter to the cultivation saying she is coming down the mountain. Lan Zhan and Wei Ying meet in a forest and end up adopting Xue yang, Moxuanyu, and A yuan. Meng Yao is cangse sanrens disciple in this fic and wen ruohan isn't causing trouble. Wuxian cross dresses in this fic and its not jiang friendly. Please can you help me

FOUND? Resplendence by FrozenMarVel (E, wangxian, JYL/JZX, JC/LXC, different first meetings, love at first sight, fluff, rogue cultivator WWX, crossdressing, flirting, fix-it of sorts, smut, WIP)

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15. Hi! I wanted to ask about a fic where lwj wakes up one morning and sees wwx sitting on the floor, crying, wearing the same clothes he was wearing the previous night because he found all the letters lwj wrote to him in those 13 years and read them. I read smth like that and forgot the name😭 @angrybagginshieldbakery

FOUND? no better version of me by idrilka (E, 8k, WangXian, Established Relationship, Love Letters, Tender Sex)

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16. Hi, I'm looking for a fic, the only thing I remember was that (due to time travel shenanigans perhaps?) WWX was absent for the investigation and fight of the waterborne abyss and as a consequence LWJ died. I think WWX only found out about it a long time later. Does anyone remember this fic? Thank you! A big thank you also to the mods for putting in the time to manage this blog!

I've read #16! I think it was caused by LXC going back in time, he could only change one thing, and decided that LWJ and WWX shouldn't become close, and so doesn't let WWX and JC come with them to fight the abyss. He then goes back to the future only to learn that LWJ died.

FOUND! Alternative Choices by StarClearWaters (Readoutloud) (T, 20k, wangxian, LXC/WQ, pov LXC, protective LXC, time travel, temporary character death, butterfly effect, mpreg, panic attacks)

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17. Hi! I'm actually looking for 2 fics! A) is LZ goes to burial mounds w/WY the lan elders start arguing through rules on a mountain with LZ eventually WY gets involved. B) is LZ had left the lan for a few years(?) and the elders, LX,&LQ try to get him to come back- the fic focuses on rules and how LZ breaks them, like it mentions him braiding beads into his hair and i also remember that LZ & WY had a wagon full of children! I love all the work you all put in on this blog! LOTS OF LOVE @chubbypotato23

17A)

FOUND? A War of Stone and Silence by kitsunealyc (T, 4k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Burial Mounds, Lans Being Crappy Communicators, Wall of Discipline, Remix)

17B)

FOUND? Unpack your heart by Terri Botta (Isilwath) (T, 22k, wangxian, 1st in series, canon divergenec, romance, everyone lives au, LWJ stays at Burial Mounds, not lan elder friendly) the part they remember starts in chapter 3

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18. hey! im looking for a modern fic where i believe wwx is married to mm and he meets lwj later.. they have an affair of sorts?? cheating was one of the tags i think. it was around 15-25k, angsty but a happy ending.. thats all i got lol. Thank you for your help!!!

FOUND? We Take Our Vows Seriously by JJSIN2020 (E, 30k, WangXian, Modern AU, LWJ is Married, WWX is not, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, emotional comfort not in your spouse, Eventual Smut, Lime spritzers, that's the drink, too bad if you don't like them)

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19. Fic finder request, please! 🙂 A modern au where WWX had created a security pc program and was pretty rich. He lives with the wens and is friends with NMJ and NHS and gets spooked early into his relationship with LWJ and runs away to hide in a hotel room. No one can find him until NHS bribes a restaurant worker and then convinces WWX to go back.

FOUND! Come Around and Stay by trippednfell (M, 160k, wangxian, modern, slow burn, kid fic, found family, it gets worse before it gets better, PTSD, blood and injury, dissociation, trauma, angst w happy ending, musicals, alternating pov, JC & WWX reconciliation, hurt/comfort, panic attacks) the scene described is in chapter 10

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20. Hi! I’m looking for a fic where Wei Wuxian travels back in time to the Cloud Recesses and immediately tried to kill himself by jumping into the river in the Cloud Recesses. He survives and then there is a scene where he uses some sort of empathy to show Lan Wangji and Nie Huaisang what happened to him that lead to home being there. I would appreciate help finding it, though I understand if you are too busy

FOUND? Without end by barisan (M, 70k, wangxian, major character death, time travel, suicide attempt, hurt/comfort, depressed WWX, protective LWJ, good uncle LQR, bad parents JFM & YZY, not YZY & JFM & Jiang friendly, implied/referenced child abuse & self harm, BAMF WWX, WIP)

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#wangxian #mdzs #wangxian fic finder #wangxian fic search #the untamed #wangxianficfinder #long post

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