I DONT LIKE ANYONE EXCEPT SOMETIMES YOU
shinso x reader
thoughts about how shinso would act in a relationship. same premise as the kirishima ver.
lovey dovey stuff, teenagers suck but love can be a beautiful thing <3
a/n: you guys ate up every summertime and started SLEEPING on NIKI. go listen to her music rn >:( song is backburner
a/n: me writing about the men who will treat me right (they literally don’t exist)
hitoshi shinso, who’s facetimes with you always run late into the night. you ramble on about your day while he hums in response, knowing that you know he’s not the talkative type. he never asks “how was your day?” he always says “tell me about your day.” because he really, truly wants to hear about your day. you could have cured a disease or simply just gotten out of bed, and he’d still want to hear every single detail simply because its from you.
hitoshi shinso, who loves to cook. only you're aware of it, because he doesn't always like sharing personal details with others, but you never complained- it just means more for you. you're always the first person that gets to try his food, though he claims you're not a very good critic. but you can't help it, everything he makes tastes so good. and with every compliment you shower him in, he'll hit you with a 'yeah, yeah, whatever.' and then next moment, make you more so you can always stay fed during long days at UA and long hours during hero-training. its his silent way of telling you he loves you.
hitoshi shinso, whose cats love you more than they love him. he has three triplets, a black british short hair, a siamese, and a grey ragdoll- pepper, lexi, and mustache- he absolutely hates the last name, but he had just adopted the kitten and you named it for its white streak right below its nose. he'll deny it forever, but he gets pouty and huffs in annoyance whenever he sees the cats run to you, even after he's fed and taken care of them for all of their lives. but he also cant deny the way his heart skips a beat whenever he seems them cuddled up with you on his bed, wearing one of his big t-shirts. it softens his heart in a way that nothing else does- your love fills his heart more strongly and more passionately than anything does.
hitoshi shinso, who is the closed-off, funny but quiet dickhead of his friend group. he's known for his out-of-pocket roasts at the right times and his nonchalant nature that contrasts with the loud, spunkiness of his multicolored-haired friends. but with you, he softens. the few times he's brought you along with him to movie night or training sessions, you've softened his heart enough for the love in him to seep out towards others as well. whenever you crack a joke, make someone else at the table smile, and draw laughs and happiness from their chests, a blush blooms across his cheeks. obviously, he fell for you, how could he not?
hitoshi shinso, who's favorite activity with you is your sunday-ritual. you'll wake up together, either in the same bed or over the phone, and bike down to the coast. you'll bug him about wearing a helmet, but he always complains that it ruins your hair. he'd never admit that its because he thinks you're absolutely adorable when you dote on him. afterwards he'll share a smoothie with you- he hates all the flavors except for mixed berry, which is the one he always insists on getting. he hates the the overpricing for what the product actually is, but loves the smile it puts on your face after a tiring bike-ride. and afterwards, you two will go back to either his of your place. his place if your parents aren't home, and his place when his parents are home, and binge watch a long t.v show of your choosing. he'll always complain that its stupid, poorly written or drawn out, but get pouty whenever you watch an episode without him. it's the one thing he looks forwards to at the end of a long week, drawn out with endless studies, training, and burnout. you're his safe place, and he needs it more than he'll admit.
hitoshi shinso, who somehow remembers every tiny detail about you. his mind works like gears, arranging formulas and deciphering codes, but the intellect of his mind makes you its priority. he remembers the way you pick your nails and cuticles when you have anxiety, and how placing his warm palm over yours soothes some of those thoughts. he remembers how prefer to tie your hair back during training but how you somehow always forget a hair tie- and he knows how you always give him a peck on his cheek once he shows off the one he's been keeping on his wrist for you. he remembers how you can't sleep without your nightly calls, and how he needs to hear your voice before he drifts of too- maybe more than you need it. he remembers the first day you met, the first thing he said to you, the first time he ever felt love for you. he remembers all of it and keeps it embedded in his heart. hitoshi shinso may seem like he hates everyone, but the one exception to that is you. and he'll remember that forever.
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ok hi haha lol I dont rly feel like going in circles in my head forever trying to figure out whether, among other "smaller" things, being left alone in a room w only media as a child and not feeling like I had even a semblance of a personality for most of my life counts as "trauma"
a lot of these parts of me are new, I'm just recently putting names to them and it feels as though I'm developing facets of personalities in my mid 20s after a lifetime of either feeling like I'm basically just ADHD in a person, an amalgamation of kins shoved into a body, or something made of guilt Also shoved into a body.
I don't like, claim to know what this means. but I don't think a lot of my current mutuals would feel comfortable interacting w me bc I don't necessarily believe in the black and white of what plurality is. I'm not able or planning on getting any formal diagnosis and while I'm discussing this w my therapist they're very much not one to pathologize
I definitely don't feel like one person but I dont think id count for most of you as a "system" as the different parts of me feel as though theyre still developing. take all of this as you will, I'm not going to stress my body out more by trying to figure out "what" I am as I've been doing that my whole life and I'm kinda tired of it.
I know that I'm not entirely one thing and feel Enough like multiple things for myself, but blurred in a lot of ways. like some sort of gem with many different facets.
not sure where to go w this tbh take this how you will. im not comfortable saying I'm leaning one way or the other regarding system discourse, (<- not a phrase i want to use but the best shorthand i have) as I genuinely don't believe the human brain is nearly that black and white.
I'm both "me" and very much not "me" at times. idk what this means but ik I'm not comfortable saying im just pandora and im not sure im "allowed" to say im a system and im not sure if it matters, or should matter, regarding friends. im going to be like this regardless, id unfollow me if this grey area im likely to stay in bothers you
if you don't want me refollowing I'd probably block, too, as my memory is bad
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just saw that there's a monster in the hull update and realized i'd missed three of those........this + the audio are such treats giggling and kicking my feet about it fr. going to leave a comment on the fic itself but in the meantime needed to drop a letter on here to say i love the way you write billie--her loneliness, her thoughtfulness, distrust of yet attraction to emily and everything she represents........not to mention the way she's haunted by daud, the longing for a life she can't fathom and will never have !!! society if everyone gave billie the complexity she deserves. and your banter and prose are stunning as always lord everything abt this fic is so good. bringing wine to you on the deck to drink together about it in spirit and yes pun intended
🙏😭 thank you so so much I don't know what to say! that's amazingly kind of you ♥ its a genuine pleasure to like. double down on themes and nuance and less popular characters and just like. idk. trustfall into the fandom that there's people with taste like you, and you can invite them onto your metaphorical deck for wine and meaningful looks 🍷♥♥♥
re: billie - no one else in the dh universe comes close to whatever she has going on
hiding my thoughts about writing dh2 billie >
there's so much material to her!
i thought i'd never write for dishonored 2 (not derogatory - its my favourite game). its undoubtedly linear & doesn't have the mystery or grit of dh1 IMO.
but i saw lapin post that billie & emily comic, and i saw a few other people i respect mention billie/emily and it had me rotating them until the abjection/emily-monster thing clicked and then it was downhill from there
but there's more to think about - what billie has been doing with herself, how she feels about daud & the whalers at this point in her life, her relationship with sokolov (god.a separate rant), her history in karnaca & dunwall, emily's place in the empire and how that fits into billie's story, her lifelong revenge arc, and comparisons between jessamine & deirdre.
like. when you consider billie's perspective you realise how fucking badass she is for going back to dunwall. she not only did it scared she did it scared for her life. suicidal level flimsy disguise trapped in a tin can with your enemy. etc
PLEASE tell me if you ever decide to post that daud & billie fic you mentioned a while back :O
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Ok I'm making an official post for Estrials. (or well official until I make a better one)
Everything below cut so I don't make anyone scroll past the novel length (/hj) post I'm about to make when they're just trying to browse their dash :]
Alright so Estrials! They're a species I made up (though they are definitely inspired by some other things like atla cause of the elemental abilities) and they can be anthro, feral, or even like catboy esque(?) (for the lack of a better term) (an example of what I mean would be my sona)
Heres some examples of existing Estrials (in order: my sona (he/it/pup) (small child edition), evil xisuma (little creature and non little creature forms), jimmy (again little creature and non little creature forms), and bigb (little creature and non little creature forms) gotta love bigb and his little sweater) (also ex is part voidwalker too which is why he looks so different from the others, so like yeah you go combine Estrials and another species that would be epic)
Here we have some of my ocs and a few of the others listed above! Ryder is also part voidwalker and technically doesn't have a little creature form, but I did include a little bust shot doodle of him
If you're still here, now I'm going to tell you how to make your own! (please do I beg I want more little creatures in the world)
Ok so, they are an open species, though there are a few rules (both like actual rules and trait rules so you stay in line with the species)
-First rule: don't be a dick. I will revoke your Estrial rights if you're not a decent person (no like actually I can't take your character but I can make a list of no good icky people so other Estrial fans know not to interact with you)
-2nd rule: have fun! No really I'm not going to be an evil overlord about people making Estrials. Just enjoy yourselves and be kind to others
-3: more of me just saying this than a rule but you can totally have more than one Estrial! Make like 50 of you want I really don't care
Now rules for like traits and stuff
-1: your Estrial has to have some sort of wings (preferably feathered ones but you can do bug or bat wings if you want) (mechanical wings are also cool! Especially if they're meant to be like a prosthetic or something that would be sick) and some sort of horns (literally any horns idc go wild) you can have any number of these traits too
-2: only one elemental ability per Estrial please (or none at all, you can make an element-less Estrial if you want) there's only one Estrial that has more than one elemental ability and he's not even really an Estrial (it's my sona, it's complicated and lore related don't ask unless you want a novel length reply full of lore)
-3: they have to be either based off of some sort of canine or some sort of feline, though you can totally add features from other things (ex: lizards or fish or deer idk) as long as the base creature that has most of the features showing (so like the main body and head I guess?) is a canine/feline you're good (so like the tail, legs, and even ears can be some other creature if you want) (River, shown above, has a fish tail and some fins kinda like vaporeon. So really, go wild)
-4: any patterns and colors are ok, so yeah make that sparkle dog looking thing !! Go wild, be free my friends. Make the shadow the hedgehog Estrial (no actually you totally could)
Ok no more rules! Info time 😈😈
-Estrials can be any size that's bigger than like a small dog (so like chihuahua ish or bigger) and smaller than a horse (yippee big creature)
-The anthro and catboy(?) Estrials can be any human height btw (anthros can be a little smaller than humans too as a treat)
-They can have any length of fur (so yeah you could make a hairless one, I'd actually be real interested to see that someone do it before I do) and be from any region (hence the different fur lengths. Some of them live in real cold places and have to be real fluffy to keep warmth in, and some live in warmer places and have a lot less fur to cool off easier)
-All Estrials can hide their wings (like magic poof they're gone completely and then poof they're back now) and the catboy(?) ones can sometimes hide all their Estrial features (so like their nose, horns, ears, wings, and tails)
-I'm leaving a whole lot up to interpretation so like go wild I guess. Just don't do anything too weird.. I don't want strange things associated with my species..
Ok now the big thing: elemental abilities
So we have 5 elements + no element (though I'm kinda thinking of adding a 6th.... maybe..). Every Estrial falls under one (and only one) of these categories, though their power levels can vary (so like some fire Estrials can only do tiny poofs of flames and others can have like whole fire tornados going on)
Fire, water, air, earth, and plant
They all overlap with others a little too
-Fire Estrials can bend/control/whatever you want to call it magma, lava, fire, and lightning. They can also heat things up, which does mean they can heat other elements enough to somewhat control those (so like heating metal until it's molten and being able to shape it, or heating water enough that it turns into steam. Though steam is a lot harder for fire Estrials to control) though they lose that ability once the element cools off again
-Water Estrials can bend things like water, ice, some gasses (if the gas has a liquid state at a reasonable temperature. So like not things that require to have subzero temps to be liquids like oxygen), and any other liquids (not including molten things if you count those as liquid).
-Air Estrials can control all gasses (unless they need to be superheated to be a gas) and air. They can also definitely move things with air, so like sandstorms and using lots of wind to lift and move big objects. They can even control the weather a bit because of this (though water Estrials also kinda can. They can make it rain at least) by blowing storms around (including hurricanes and tornados, though they can also cause them too)
-Earth Estrials can control anything that's made of some sort of metal or mineral. So like glass (even if it's not molten, they can still change its shape, though they can also control molten glass) any rock, and all kinds of dirt (including compost in case you were wondering. So like if its considered dirt they can control it)
-Plant Estrials can control all plants. And can move things using plants. And can grow plants. Idk what you want from me the name is kinda self explanatory.. they can also grow plants in their fur (or hair if you have a catboy(?) Estrial) (again I don't really know what else to call them..) this does include stuff like coral, mold, and fungus btw so go wild with your biohazard mold guy (omg Ethan Winters ??? Somebody call crumb immediately) (that is a joke do not call crumb cuptoast just because I referenced Ethan Winters..) (though crumb if you somehow see this hiiii you can make an Ethan Winters Estrial, that would be so sick actually)
That's about it for now! If you have any questions feel free to ask away by commenting, dming me, asking them in the reblogs, sending an actual ask, hell you could even dm me on another platform like twt or something idc. Also, if you make one Please.. please show it to me.. I will be so incredibly happy if I saw your Estrial.. as a treat, for me.. please.. (also do credit me for the species if you post about them. You could just tag me or do like a @/jalo-parker just as long as my user is there you're good)
Ok, bye bye now have a good day :DDDD
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