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nerdzzone · 3 years

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Only For A Moment: November [part two]

Summary: A series of shorter one shots from Chris and Whitney’s life together throughout the pandemic. Some happy times, some harder times, some fluff and some things a little more sexy - they work through it all as they try to get settled in their new and blossoming relationship.

Chris Evans x OFC

18+

Part of the Once Bitten/More Hearts series

Only For A Moment: October + November [part one]

Note: Life is very hectic at the moment so this was edited quite quickly. I think I caught all the mistakes, but I’m sorry if there’s any accidentally left in.

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The photo shoot the next day went amazingly well. After being out of work for almost ten months, it took me a little while to get back into the swing of it, but I hit my stride quickly once I'd settled in. It helped that I was working with people who made my job almost effortless. Sebastian and Anthony had such good chemistry and were so good at what they do that we got through the day with no hiccups and I had more than enough photos to give Marvel what they'd asked for ten times over.

When I got back to the hotel room, I was in a great mood and it was made even better by the surprise for Chris that I had with me.

"Chris?" I called out as I walked into our large suite. "I'm back!"

He lifted an arm to wave from where he was sitting on the couch, his attention still fixed on the football game that was on the TV.

"How was the shoot?" He asked. "How are Mackie and Seb?"

I smiled, knowing he was about to be very excited as I answered him.

"Why don't you ask them yourself?"

That question got his attention and his head shot around to see what I was talking about. As his eyes landed on the two men standing behind me, a grin burst onto his face.

"No way!" He laughed as he leapt up to join us. "Hey, guys!"

All of us - Chris included - had been tested several times over the last few days to make sure that we were all virus free. There was obviously a small chance that one of us could have picked it up some time after one of the many negative results, but I was fairly confident that was pretty unlikely as we'd all been as careful as possible so I'd invited them over for a few drinks. Our hotel room was big enough for us to all keep our distance anyway and I knew that Chris would appreciate the chance to catch up with his friends.

They both greeted Chris before Anthony looked around the room.

"This place is nice!" He observed. "Marvel must love you, you could fit my room in here at least three times!"

"It's not Marvel who loves me," I smirked. "It's Chris - he upgraded our room."

There was a goofy grin on Chris' face as our two guests 'aww'd' in tandem.

"That was too cheesy," Anthony teased. "But man, don't you love me too? Where's my upgrade?"

"I'll get you next time," Chris laughed. "But to be honest, I thought you'd be staying with Sebastian now that you two are a power couple."

Sebastian snorted out a laugh, but Anthony nodded his head.

"I know, man! That's what I said, but Sebastian still won't tell me where he lives!"

"Because you're so obsessed with my couch that I'm worried you'll steal it!"

"Shouldn't buy yourself a five thousand dollar couch if you don't want people to talk about it," Anthony joked, making Sebastian roll his eyes.

"It didn't cost anywhere near that much money. You've never even seen it, I don't know where you got all these ideas from."

"When are you two getting married?" I interrupted with a smirk on my face as they both turned to look at me, their confusion clear. "Sorry, you've just been bickering like an old married couple all day. I was wondering when you were going to make it official."

"That's what we should be asking you two!" Anthony turned it around. "When did this happen anyway?"

"April," Chris answered, sliding his arm around my waist to pull me close. "After a month trapped in a house with me with no other options, she was finally desperate enough to give me a chance."

"That is not what happened," I laughed. "It was more just the fact that being trapped in a house together made us finally have some tough conversations that we'd never had the guts to have before."

"Well, I'm happy for you," Anthony grinned. "And some people owe me some money because I knew you'd get together eventually."

"Wait, you were betting on us?" Chris asked. "With who?"

"Not me," Sebastian was quick to interject, but Anthony just shrugged.

"There was a bunch of us in on it," he admitted. "Downey, Pratt, Renner, Hemsworth, Paul Rudd, Lizzie Olsen, and I think even the Russos. Someone was keeping track of it, I'll have to make some phone calls."

"I don't even want to hear about this," I laughed, shaking my head. I wasn't at all surprised, they were a tight crew and there was plenty of downtime on set for them to get up to all kinds of antics, but I had no desire to hear who was betting on our situation. "So, shall we have some drinks? What does everyone want? I figured we could just order from room service."

After a brief discussion on the matter, we ordered several beers for the men and a bottle of wine for me. It arrived with impressive speed - no doubt a perk of being with a group of celebrities in a penthouse suite - and we all settled around the living room, trying our best to keep some distance between us.

We chatted and caught up, discussing what we'd done to keep ourselves busy through lockdown and when things might start to be more normal - the usual pandemic conversations. The boys were just delving into some sports discussions that were totally lost on me when I received a message from Lisa saying that Grayson was having a bit of a moment and asked if I was able to call. It broke my heart to think of him missing us so I excused myself and did as she asked.

He was crying when she passed him the phone and I felt awful, immediately filled with guilt that we’d selfishly decided to stay in New York for the whole weekend. We would have arrived home quite late if we left right after the shoot, but as I couldn't remember the last time that he’d stayed overnight with someone other than Chris or I, it suddenly seemed cruel to have left him for so long.

He was in bed already, but unable to fall asleep so I chatted with him for a bit before singing him the lullaby that I'd been singing to him since he was born. It worked like a charm and once he was out, Lisa took the phone back.

"Is he doing okay?" I asked, fighting back tears of my own. "Has he been like this all day?"

"No, no, of course not!" She assured me. "He's been totally fine, we've had a great time. He just got a bit weepy as I was tucking him in."

"I'm glad he's been having fun," I sniffled. "I hate to think of him being upset."

"He's just fine, sweetheart," she insisted. "This will be good for all of you. It's good for him to get used to being away from you two and it must be nice for you two to have a break."

"It is," I admitted. "It just feels selfish when he's upset like that."

"Well, sometimes even us moms need to be a little selfish," Lisa laughed. "And selfishly on my part, it's been wonderful having him here."

I smiled, knowing she had been quite excited about their little sleepover.

"We really appreciate you taking him."

"It's absolutely my pleasure. Now, I'll let you get back to whatever you were doing and I will see you tomorrow."

"Thanks, Lisa. I'll message you when we're heading out so you know when to expect us."

She assured me that they'd be home whenever we arrived and we said our goodbyes before I headed back out to the living room.

"Everything okay?" Chris asked as soon as I sat down.

"Yeah, for the most part," I sighed. "Grayson just got a bit upset at bedtime, I guess. He was crying and wanted to talk to me, but he's fine now."

Sensing I was feeling a bit emotional about it, Chris reached out and squeezed my hand as Anthony spoke.

"I was hoping you'd bring the little man with you. How's he doing?"

I smiled as a grin burst onto Chris' face. He went into a long, somewhat boastful explanation of just how good Grayson was doing, informing them of his extensive dinosaur knowledge and his impressive skills on his bike. It was heartwarming to hear the pride in his voice as he spoke and it was even nicer to see Sebastian and Anthony's genuine interest in hearing about him.

"They grow so damn fast, don't they?" Anthony commented. "One day they can hardly move and then suddenly they're practically BMX champions."

"Oh, no," I shook my head. "It took a good five months for me to allow him to take his training wheels off. He won't be BMX-ing any time soon."

"Well, I hear things are always scarier with the first one," Sebastian pointed out. "Maybe your next one can be the extreme sports star."

"Yeah, that's a good point," Anthony agreed. "When are you having another?"

I tossed back my last sip of wine before letting out a laugh at that question and side-eyeing Chris as I poured myself another glass.

"Did Chris pay you to ask me that?"

"No!" Anthony laughed. "But it's been, what? Four years? Seems like it's about time for another."

Chris snickered as he took a swig from the bottle of beer he was drinking, clearly feeling validated by Anthony's comments, but I just shook my head.

"We've been together for less than a year," I reminded them. "That's hardly long enough to start thinking about another baby."

"Sure, it is," Anthony shrugged. "Maybe not if the relationship is brand new, but you already have one kid, what's the harm in throwing another in the mix?"

"And we already know that we can work together as parents through complicated situations."

I shot Chris a look after his interjection because I really didn't think his friends needed to be involved in a discussion like this, but Sebastian chimed in as the voice of reason.

"It's more complicated than that though, isn't it?" He asked. "Babies are stressful and can ruin a relationship if you're not ready for it."

"Exactly! Thank you, Seb."

"What does he know?" Anthony teased. "He's never had a baby."

I rolled my eyes as I sipped my drink, trying to ignore Chris' smug face.

"If you're such a big fan of the idea, Anthony, why don't you have more kids?"

"More? I already have four!" He laughed. "That's more than enough. Hell, after being in lockdown with them, you could have one of mine if you're not ready to have another of your own."

"I think we're good with one right now," I insisted with a smile. "At least until we see where this whole pandemic thing ends."

"Alright, alright, that's fair," Anthony relented. "But just remember when the time comes, Anthony is a solid name. Or even Antonia for a girl."

"Actually," I smirked. "I do quite like the name Sebastian."

Sebastian barked out a laugh over Anthony's protests as Chris came up with a compromise.

"Sebastian Anthony Evans?" He suggested.

"Can you imagine?" I giggled. "Your fans would lose their minds. You'd have to raise him together, you could make a reality show out of it."

"That's a money making opportunity right there," Anthony grinned. "You just let me know when you need me to show up."

"As entertaining as that sounds, it won't be any time soon," I insisted before changing the subject. "What about you, Sebastian? How's your love life going? Any babies on the horizon?"

His cheeks instantly tinged pink at the attention being flipped onto him as he answered the question and Anthony’s teasing shifted to him.

About an hour later, after our guests left, I found myself stretched out on the couch with my head in Chris' lap as he ran his fingers through my hair. It felt so good that I was resisting the urge to purr like a happy cat when Chris distracted me with a question.

"How was the shoot?" He asked. "I just realized that I never got an answer."

"It was great," I smiled up at him. "It felt weird at first after being away for so long, but Sebastian and Anthony are such goofs. It helped me relax and get back into it."

I felt his body shake as he chuckled, no doubt knowing his friends well enough to imagine the antics they got up to.

"I'm glad it went well. Maybe now there's more projects starting up, you'll start getting more job offers again and you won't have to go so long without doing it."

"Oh, I've had plenty of job offers," I admitted. "But most of them I'd have to travel for or they just seem too risky."

Chris was clearly surprised by that confession as I hadn't mentioned any of the proposals I'd received to him, but it didn't seem important when I'd never even considered taking any of the jobs.

"Why didn't you tell me about it?" He asked. "We could have worked something out and made it happen."

"Because I didn't want to accept any of the offers," I assured him. "I don't feel super comfortable flying around the country right now and most of them had pretty half-assed safety protocols in place. This was the first one that was close by and had a clear and thorough safety plan. Marvel wanted me for Wandavision too, but I would’ve had to go to L.A. and I didn't feel great about that."

Chris frowned, his fingers pausing momentarily in my hair as he mulled over my answer.

"I get it, that's solid reasoning," he nodded. "But I'm sorry you've had to make decisions like that. I know you love what you do."

"So do you," I shrugged. "So do a lot of people who are currently out of work. I've got it pretty good, I try to focus on that."

"Sure, but that doesn't mean you aren't allowed to miss things too," Chris insisted before letting out a sigh. "Do you ever worry that things won't ever get back to normal?"

As I looked up at him and saw the melancholy look on his face, I felt a wave of vulnerability wash over me.

"Not really," I admitted. "I worry more about what will happen when they do..."

"Oh?" Chris raised an eyebrow. "How come?"

"Well, don't get me wrong, I don't want anyone to get sick anymore and I don't want any more people to die. I want to see my family again and meet my nephew and I want Grayson to be able to go to school and make friends," I prefaced my statement. "But for us, it's been really nice. We've been able to figure each other out and build our relationship without anything else interfering and I just worry that when things go back to normal, it won't work."

The hurt that flashed across Chris' face made my chest tighten. I hadn't meant to upset him, but it was foolish of me to think that my doubts wouldn't be hard to hear.

"You don't think we'll stay together when the lockdowns are all done?"

"No, that's not what I meant!"

"Well, that's what you said..."

"I said it was something I worry about," I clarified. "And I do. It'll be a lot harder when we're both working again."

"It's one thing to think it'll be harder," Chris scowled. "It's another to think we can't make it work. Are you planning on running at the first sign of trouble?"

Feeling the panic bubbling inside me, I pulled my head out of Chris' lap and sat up so I was facing him. I did want to run away in that moment - his harsh tone hurting my feelings and making my defences bubble to the surface - but I reminded myself of how avoiding our problems had worked for us in the past and tried to stay calm and explain myself.

"I'm not going to run away, Chris," I assured him. "And I don't really appreciate the way you're speaking to me right now. You asked a question and I explained my feelings, but instead of wanting to talk through that, you're immediately getting upset. I'm allowed to have concerns and all you're doing right now is making them worse."

Despite my frustrations, I kept my voice calm as I spoke and it seemed to have the desired effect as the tension in Chris' body eased slightly.

"Sorry, you're right," he sighed. "I just thought we've been doing so well, I'm surprised that you still have doubts."

"We're just living in such a bubble right now," I pointed out. "When everything goes back to normal and we're both back at work more, we'll be so busy. Balancing that with making sure Grayson gets enough of our attention, it might not leave much time for us and that would strain any relationship."

"It'll be more of a challenge than it is now," Chris agreed, his words spoken cautiously as if they were carefully chosen. "But most parents struggle with balancing their relationship with time spent with their kids. We'll just have to make the effort."

"But we have more to cope with than most parents."

He looked skeptical of that claim.

"How so?"

"Well, you'll be away a lot once you start filming things again," I reminded him, knowing that his next project had plans to film in L.A. and Europe. "And you'll be surrounded by beautiful, smart, talented women who I pale in comparison to."

"That’s not true, but regardless, I won't even look at them twice." His voice was firm and for a moment I worried that he was annoyed again, but as he took my hand in his and lifted his eyes to meet mine, he just seemed sincere. "I love you, Whitney. I only want to be with you."

"I know, I do, I know that. I love you too and I trust you, but I guess it just still feels like you being in love with me is too good to be true."

"I don't think that you do know," Chris insisted. "I'm completely committed to you. I know it's only been a few months, but it's been some of the best months of my life. What we've been doing - you, me and Grayson just hangin’ out and being a family - it's what I've been dreaming of since he was born, it's what I've always wanted. I can't imagine a future without you in it, I don't even want to think about it. I love you and I love the life we're building together."

I felt my eyes grow glassy as he spoke, my heart melting at his words.

"Wow," I murmured quietly. It was a lame response to such heartfelt words, but I was trying to process everything he’d said and, after a moment of staring into his beautiful eyes, I choked out a laugh. "That almost sounded like a proposal."

Chris chuckled and nodded his head.

"I know. Even I wondered where I was going with that for a minute there," he admitted. "It wasn't, but it's all true. I'm in this for as long as you'll have me."

He lifted my hand up to place a kiss on my knuckles and I suddenly felt ridiculous for having any doubts.

"I feel the same," I assured him. "I really do. I don't want you to think that I'm not as invested in this as you are. I just like how things are now and thinking about it changing scares me."

"It'll be different, but we can make it work."

I smiled and crawled into his laps, letting my knees rest on either side of his thighs.

"I guess I've just been spoiled these last few months," I mused, pressing a soft kiss on his lips. "I don't want to share you with the world, I want you all to myself."

Chris chuckled as our foreheads rested against each other.

"You really are clingy," he teased. "I always thought I'd be the needy one in this relationship."

"Shut up," I giggled, pressing our lips briefly together again. "And for the record, all those sweet, wonderful things you just said aren't getting you any closer to convincing me we should have another baby yet."

Chris' head fell backwards as a laugh burst from his chest.

"Alright, alright, well, it was worth a shot," he smirked. "But seriously, that's how confident I am in us. It wouldn’t even scare me if we did because I know we can handle it."

I smiled even though I probably didn't share quite that much confidence in our future. I wouldn't bet against us, but I wasn't ready to bring a baby into a situation that might not be such smooth sailing in a few months.

"We have to think about Grayson too though," I pointed out. "He's had a lot to deal with the last few months, a lot of big changes. Throwing a sibling at him on top of everything else might be a little bit cruel."

"That's true," Chris relented, looking a bit defeated for a moment until a smile slid onto his face. "He'll be such a good big brother though. He'll be so excited to teach him everything he knows."

"Him?" I questioned, raising an eyebrow. "We're going to have another boy, are we?"

"Him or her," Chris shrugged. "I'd be happy either way."

I couldn't help, but smile at his enthusiasm. It was a nice thought even if it was clearly a more distant fantasy for me than it was for Chris.

"One day," I assured him. "I love you, Chris."

"I love you too."

With a strength that never ceased to amaze me, he then stood from the couch, lifting me up with him. I wrapped my legs around his waist, giggling at the impressive feat as he carried me to our bedroom where we spent the rest of the night showing some physical appreciation and love for each other.

December

Tags: @maggotzombie @moonlacebeam @mizzzpink @zaylaugh @flowery-mess @flowerjewels @njrronaldo7 @hockeychick10 @partypoison00 @theladybiers @sidepieces @firoozehmoon @patzammit @sparkledfirecracker @mytbel0st @chvntelle-99 @mjey12

#chris evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans fan fiction #chris evans fanfic #chris evans fic #chris evans fluff #once bitten/more hearts #only for a moment

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bxllafanficc · 3 years

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¡Skate/sing your hearts out! (Yuri Plisetsky x reader)

(part seven)

Part one. Masterlist!

Summary: After last year's cancellation of Figure Skating Grand Prix, Yuri Plisetsky finds himself unable to bring out his inner skater after a year of doing nothing but enjoy life like a regular teenager. That's when you enter the picture; We Are Voice Grand Awards's currently hottest competitive vocalist come first place two years in a row. Just like the other competitors of Grand Prix, it turns out that Victor and Yuuri faces the same issue. With an arrangement between Victor and Yakov, they agree to travel to Japan and hire you as a mutual coach for Yuri and Yuuri to help bring back the emotion into their performances like before, maybe even more intense than ever. Yuri however, who's never experienced issues with his coaches before, for some reason finds this one particularly difficult to coexist along with in their (reasonably) odd partnership. Warnings: none

*Yuri's POV*

(Next week)

A week had passed by in a rather slow pace. Yuri's recovery seemed to never end when it had just been a few days. But those days were spent sleeping and eating, using his phone and sleeping some more. Mostly he had no one to talk to since everyone were busy with their own lives. Especially (Y/n) who had to keep her inner performer alive at all times. Her coach came with the idea of hosting a smaller gig where (Y/n) would perform about two or three numbers for the people of Japan. It was planned out as a small nightclub gig at first but the numbers of interested in Japan rose over the charts and well... (Y/n) said that she didn't want to let anyone down. Though her coach was apparently hesitant into taking more than a hundred people. 'Three numbers are too little for a concert.' They said but the people of Japan insisted on paying for the price a concert ticket anyway.

(Y/n) had told him this two days after his fever started. He remembered it made him scoff at how she decided the ticket would only cost a quarter of what a normal concert ticket would then. He had told her it was a ridiculous way of thinking.

He barely saw her after the first day of his fever. The way Yuri had taken a hold of her hand and fallen asleep... She waited until he woke up. Well, not exactly waited. She fell asleep at the edge of his bed.

And since that, the two of you barely talked during the days. They barely even met before she went to bed because she spent every waking hour to practice her numbers with her backup dancers. She still made you breakfast when she head the time though.

Yuri's glad it would soon be over and he could go back to normal. Everyone had been attending to him like he was some child and he felt like a huge burden. He had told Victor that he wished (Y/n) especially wouldn't just dismiss his attempts at doing things on his own just because he couldn't get out of bed with single effort. 'Right, she told me about that! You fell on your face right after while trying, didn't you?' He had replied.

So... yeah... Yuri wanted things to return to normal real fast. Yakov had promised him that he would get to start his session with (Y/n) as soon as the music for the program was set. And that was what Victor had been helping him with a couple times. It was hard to find something he wanted to use. Everything felt overused and boring. Just another performance. Yuri didn't want it to pass as that. He wanted to stand out and earn his gold medal for real just as last year. Now was also really the year of improvement so the music had to be well thought through. He was certainly going to take advantage of having a coach for emotional performances with him this season as well. Meaning, his free skate program was already set to be something hurtful and strong. Not love, he already did that. Something far more serious. He wanted the audience to cry after his performance. Everyone should be bawling. Yakov, piglet, Victor and even (Y/n).

Most important of all, no one would be expecting him to do a program with such deep meaning. Because he was one to avoid it in the past.

His short program should be something upbeat and flashy. He wanted the choreography so intense that he'd be coughing up blood at the end of the performance, if that was possible. So the music had to make the pulse of the audience rise when hearing it. Meaning, the music would be in the rock genre. And he already had just the song for it.

This performance would show off his skills and flexibility as well as the importance of his stamina since the entire program would be non-stop step sequences and jumps throughout almost the entire music. Since he intended to be in better shape than ever before before the competition started, he felt no point in holding back on anything. If he played it safe, then what was the point?

"Ah! Good morning Yuri! I come bearing gifts!" Victor busted the door open with his foot and stumbled inside the room, balancing a tray in his hand. The tray was set down in front of him and Victor sat down at the end of Yuri's bed.

"Where's (Y/n)?" Yuri was truly surprised to see Victor being the one to bring you the breakfast today. It had been her until now. And he hadn't even seen as much as her face today since she left so early.

"Ouch. I'm replaced already? I can't go on knowing I'm not your favorite anymore, you know." Victor put a dramatic hand to his forehead and fell backwards onto Yuri's legs. The tray with the breakfast threatened to tumble and Yuri made an effort to stabilize it. It was bacon and eggs with apple slices. A part of him felt a little sad that the slices weren't in the shape of stars...

"You were never my favorite, old man. And you didn't answer my question." Yuri picked up the fork and pointed it towards the man slopped unto the bed end. He ignored the sad pout he received and took a bite of the apple cut into pieces. Each slice were to large and it didn't even taste the same even though they were of the same apples like yesterday. The eggs were decent and the bacon slightly undercooked. Victor's efforts to cook for the household during the day were appreciated of course. But there was no wonder why (Y/n) stood for the head of the dinner at days when her schedule wasn't as crazy.

"She's practicing like mad. Called her dancers to say that she would be starting a few hours ahead of time because she got an energy boost. She wants the show to be at her best efforts possible."

"I haven't even seen her today. How can she practice like a maniac when she's probably already learned her numbers flawlessly?"

Victor was watching Yuri with a funny look. Probably wondering where all those questions came from.

"I think the show is a way for her to relax."

Say what? Going out of bed before sunrise and coming back from practice just mere hours before midnight could never be considered relaxation. Yuri would never be able to pull that off. That was an insane view of the word relaxing, definitely.

"The steam and demands from her competition in We are voice are currently lifted off her shoulders like heavy weights, you know. This is probably just fun to her. She doesn't have to compete with anyone. I think it gives her a sense of relief."

Yuri stopped eating and thought a little extra on what Victor said.

Yes. She was always stressed in every video where a fan or a nosy reporter came out of nowhere and started recording. Yuri had seen those videos. Especially the one where the random person happened to record the exact moment her mind broke down and she had a breakdown in front of a large crowd. Now there was no denying that Yuri sees (Y/n) as the most weirdest and ridiculous being alive. The way she is so determined to get her way and how much she cares for strangers she's never met. Yuri kind of still consider the two of them to be strangers, even after two weeks being with each other on a daily basis. Her eyes are also too intense for anyone to be up close with to her face and as if that wasn't enough, she's also a morning person and that's already a big warning sign to stay away from a person.

But even though he had had this mental conversation with him many times. Even though he agreed that he disliked her; he couldn't help but being captivated by her performances.

It felt so weird seeing her cry like that just minutes before her performance and then watching her going on stage having the time of her life. There was no doubt she loved her fans and performing on stage but that was one of those moments where Yuri really got to see the mind behind the happy smile. It was the first time he had seen her crying or feeling a negative emotion. It's still the first but he got a taste of her irritated self not so long ago.

It made Yuri think about her performance that day. It was a remarkable song filled with sheerness and excitement and her eyes were still wet with tears as she got up on stage.

"Remember (Y/n) performing 'Animal' during the acappella collaboration sequence?"

"Yes! One of my favorites. She was so happy on stage that day." While it had been true that she found happiness, it's not to ignore how broken she felt right before. 'Animal' by Neon Trees (A/N: listen to the Glee version of the song for the best acapella dynamic!) Was one of (Y/n)'s best performances, according to Yuri. He had watched it on repeat just this morning. There's really nothing special to the song in itself. It was the way she delivered every word and tune with such bravery after her internal battle like that. Her emotional response has always been on point but this particular song was something completely real and touching with her tears glistening in the corner of her eyes the entire performance. The tears of sadness had been replaced with joy and she had genuinely just been having a great time with the acapella group at her side, cheering and jumping around on stage with stars in her eyes.

'Oh, oh

I want some more

Oh, oh

What are you waiting for?

Say goodbye to my heart tonight'

The chorus were always his favorite part. Maybe it was the interpretation of the love-hate relationship the words of the lyrics intended. (Y/n) was belting out 'what are you waiting for' with such passion even though it was hardly a difficult song to perform.

'Here we are again

I feel the chemicals kickin' in

It's gettin' heavier and

I wanna run and hide

I wanna run and hide'

The short verse got him every time. The way her eyes watered at the end and then were immediately blown away by the chorus once again. The way she let go of her sadness and let her happy thoughts consume her. No, she let the song consume her and gave the song a completely different touch never done before.

Yuri had lost count of the time he'd watched it and he knew the choreography and song in and out by now. It was mainly intended for the purpose of studying her expression and getting some kind of inspiration for his music choice. He wanted his theme of his music choice for the free skate program to be 'to let go'. If there's any theme harder than love, then it's letting go of the thing you love. And not just what you love. Letting go to be able to love as well. Whether it's love for yourself or another person. There are countless interpretations and that's what (Y/n) had performed that day, with no intention whatever of doing it in such a way.

"I have... I have chosen the music for my program. At the inspiration of t-that performance."

Now don't get Yuri wrong. He'd never admit it to anyone that (Y/n) had been an inspiration to his free skate. He would probably had figured out the idea anyway, it would just had taken a little longer. And her performance was his own way to interpret it so he'd been the one to come up with the decision anyway. So in a way, she didn't have anything to do with it. And his choice of song would be far more intense and heartbreaking than anything Neon Trees could produce. And so Yuri told Victor about his music choices even though he had no clue why he put that kind of trust into the man.

"Those are some really clever choices when combined with your own vision. I'm almost a little jealous. Maybe I should just hire (Y/n) as my coach myself. It seems like it did wonders for you already!" The man laughed and patted Yuri on the shoulder.

"Nonsense. She hasn't began coaching me yet. She had no part in this." Yuri pushed away the empty tray to make room for sitting up and crossing his legs.

"Oh, but it seems like you learned a lot by ogling her all day long though." The smirk Yuri received made his teeth grit and his ears flush.

"I-i wasn't ogling her!"

"Then what were you doing exactly? I heard 'Animal' playing for a good 30 minutes from the wall connected to the room beside yours." Victor laughed at the startled freeze of The Russian Punk.

Okay fine. Maybe he went overboard with the video. But a new problem had seemed to appear now as he admitted defeat.

Yuri now had a witness that would have to be taken care of somehow. He leaned forwards and gripped the collar of Victor's shirt in a tight fist. The glare of daggers shot forwards onto the smiling man.

"Tell anyone about it and you're gonna have to reconstruct that pretty nose of yours. That's a promise,not a threat."

"Trust me! You won't hear a peep!"

#inspiration #yuri on stage #yurio plisetsky #yuri on ice fanfiction #yuri on ice fandom #yurianime #yuri katsuki #yuri on ice #yuri plisetsky x reader #yuri plisetsky #best anime #anime icons #animelove #anime fanfic #viktor nikirofov #yuuri on ice #yuuri katsuki

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mind-balm · 2 years

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Other peoples’ opinions, why do they matter so much?

What other people think of us is a preoccupation driving our anxiety and overthinking. As a coach and (self proclaimed) recovering people pleaser, I talk to many women who come to me about their careers, families and relationships, they want to explore why they don’t feel like they are able to navigate their life with ease. I have noticed that one of the biggest mind blocks for my clients is what others think of them.

People are willing to exist in really painful situations because they think it is what is expected of them. Upbringing and society has taught them it’s important to please other people even at a cost to themselves, in order to be acceptable. Many of my clients are shocked when they realise what they have actually been tolerating in order to avoid any negative evaluation from others. Things like not spending time with the people closest to them because they are too polite to say no to invitations, or not applying for a promotion because it might appear too pushy. Spending time with people who bully them because they don’t want to be confrontational or appear difficult.

Why do we care so much about other peoples’ opinions? It is because our brains are ‘social brains’ they have evolved to make connections to others through reciprocal interactions – give and take. You offer goodwill in order to receive it, which makes a lot of logical sense. Humans have evolved from a tribal culture, back when we were hunter-gatherers, we had to conform to the tribes’ norms because not doing so meant certain death, no individual could make it out in the wilderness alone without the protection of the tribe. In order to survive, we needed to be seen in a positive light by our pack or we would be rejected and left alone. Other peoples opinions could be a matter of life or death.

This is why social rejection can actually stimulate the same part of the brain that is activated by physical pain. No wonder we are driven to distraction trying to fit in and to avoid rejection. Although our bodies are well designed to deal with stress, it was predominantly intended for physical rather than psychological threats. In modern life we are mostly faced with psychological threats, which manifests itself through our anxieties for example about how our bodies look and how we dress or behave.

Our desire for harmonious consensus can also be explained through the psychological phenomenon of Groupthink. Poor decisions can be made collectively in groups due to each individual’s desire to conform, especially if they fear being shunned. This is commonly seen in politics or the military where the consequences of groupthink can potentially be catastrophic.

Worrying about what other people think is quite a natural impulse, however it can be quite maladapted to modern life. Social media has heightened its affect. We now have this complicated and hyper connected world to attach our insecurities to, where once we would have had little or no idea what other people were doing, now we can find out all sorts of live information about their activities. While there can many advantages to this level of connection, there is also a feeling of needing to compete and be seen to be ‘living our best life’. When we think that’s what we should be showing others in order to validate our existence within the pack, it has us questioning how we look, act and behave. However the modern day ‘pack’ is not just smaller groups of 10-20 individuals, it now extends to unnaturally large groups, depending on how big your social media network is.

A negative assessment by another person can lead to shame, which makes u feel worthless, incompetent or immoral. People will go to great lengths to avoid feeling shame. The fear of shame manifest itself by thinking people will reject you based on your values, beliefs, what you wear or how you look. To a certain extent the beauty and fashion industry feeds off of this fear. Fear is the most raw of emotions because it has the highest survival value for humans, but in the absence of fear all possibilities lie open, because fear has the ability to overpower any other emotion.

So how can we overcome the worry of what other people think?

People don’t care!

Remember that people don’t care nearly as much as we think they do, it is something we habitually overestimate. Most of the time people are far too busy worrying about themselves to be thinking about what someone else is doing. In the event someone does judge you, they hardly every do it your face so you wont even know about it. If you do come to know, it barely has any real tangible consequences for you. Lucky for us, someone rejecting you no longer means death by lion attack. So you feel the sting of rejection because your brain is wired that way but the good news is that there’s no physical consequence, hooray!

Reject shame

A bit of shame is a healthy safety check to keep your integrity in place and to be a generally good human being. For example not hurting other people with harsh words or actions will be filtered through your shame lens. But there are so many situations where it really doesn’t matter, for example tripping up or having your skirt tucked into your knickers is not going to fundamentally change anyone’s opinion of you.

Being more open and authentic will clear the cobwebs in your shame closet because what are you really hiding anyway? Remember that showing vulnerability doesn’t make you weak it actually makes you stronger than someone who hides behind bravado to mask their insecurities. When you’re willing to face the fear of shame and rejection its because you know it wont kill you and the consequences are never as bad as you imagine them to be. Brenè Brown has researched and written extensively on this subject, I would recommend you look up her ted talks about it.

Stop judging other people

“Judge not, that ye be not judged” (Jesus)

Notice when you’re unfairly evaluating someone else. Try to demonstrate more understanding and compassion, even in situations you wouldn’t ever personally experience. You will start to notice the things that you judge others for is usually rooted in what you don’t like about yourself. When you see others through a lens of compassion you naturally start to direct more compassion towards yourself.

Walk out of the prison

The prison of other peoples’ approval can be truly maddening. In truth its impossible to be all things to all people and if you try to attain a perfect approval rating, you will probably fail and the anxiety that comes with that is deeply hurtful.

Ultimately you cannot control what other people really think about you, you just have to let it go, easier said than done I know, but empowering to know that you have much more control over how you choose to feel about it. What might help you to let go, is to know that most of the time criticism, judgment or dislike from someone else it isn’t really about you at all. It’s totally about their own view of the world and perhaps a reflection of how they feel about themselves, something we call projection. Have you ever disliked someone and you couldn’t quite put your finger on the reason why? Well it’s probably because they remind you of someone you hated at school and now this person is innocently triggering you, they have no idea (you might not have any idea either). You are projecting your own insecurities onto someone else, it would seem silly for that person to ruin their day, week or month worrying about why you seemed off with them when you bumped into each other wouldn’t it?

Worrying about what other people think about you, is mostly a fantasy created by overthinking that’s triggered by our evolved nervous system, which was nurtured by our upbringings. Its not easy to change the way your brain is wired, it is notoriously stubborn but its certainly not impossible with a little awareness, clarity and practice.

#personaldevelopment #coaching #worrying #womensempowerment #what other people say #othersopinion

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blues-fandom-bullshit · 4 years

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‘’My Human,, | Noir X Reader

Firstly, Noir belongs to @bigoltrashpile and they have given me permission to write about him for this. This may be triggering for the readers, so be aware. Under the cut is where it starts to get darker. WARNING: FTM reader, dysphoria, depression, self harm, blood.

Noir knew about your gender, and preferred pronouns, and about the mental scars that burned deep into your mind when you were younger. What he didn’t know was they went from burning deep to carving.

It wasn’t an uncommon thing for him to see your expression drooping when he looked away, or the sort of forced smile you always seemed to wear. But, for as long as he’s known you, this has been how you were, so he just.. thought it was natural.

Oh, was he wrong.

For months you’ve both wanted to reach out to your skeletal boyfriend, to tell him something was wrong, and that you needed him. But, the other half wanted to break off the relationship before he wasted anymore of his time.

But, it seemed he was inseparable from you. When you became distant, he appeared at your residence with a warm drink, cookies, and a look of ‘Where The Fuck Is My Favorite Human?!’ A rather comical look. A mafia don appearing at your tiny home, a container of those store bought cookies with the bright, creamy icing and multiple colored sprinkles and a thermos of crimson, scowling as he juggled both objects while knocking on your door. phone pressed between his skull and shoulder, your number dialed.

Those usually ended up with him spending the night, and you saying it was just some more nightmares and even stress from work. He scoffed some, saying you didn’t need to work with him around. He.. really couldn’t read a room.

A part of you that was happy he continued to stay was the same part that whispered to you compliments when you looked in the mirror. The same one that told you to eat that day, something nutritious. One that lulled you to sleep after your eyes burned, your lungs ached, and your mind throbbed from a light night of crying from a panic attack.

A voice that was buried under all the hateful, negative, lying ones that told you the world would be better off, or you’d always be seen as a girl, never a boy, that told you Noir deserved better.

But.. That voice was Noir’s.

And it hurt.

Everything hurt.

So.. you thought about giving up.. But no.. you had to suffer another day. That was your punishment for doing such terrible things to people.

But.. What if you just.. gave in..? Surely, death would have a better punishment than life.

Surely..

So here you lay now, leaning against a wall in the bathroom, in the far back of your house, blood pooling around you, all leaking from your chest.

You just.. cut too deep this time. Cut too much.

People destroy things they don’t like. Things they hate. So you did that to your chest.

You never had the money to buy a proper binder, and the bandage wrap you used had gotten too tattered, and you’d gone out just an hour ago to buy some more.

Only problem is, your boss had threatened to extend your hours and cut your pay because your work had been a few hours late and wasn’t it’s previous quality. Added to having to look at your too feminine face in the mirror. See your chest every time you laid down, got dressed, woke up, looked down. Not only that, but your menstruation was starting soon and it only made things worse. And the misgendering you faced. You were still stuck in a conservative town that usually knows how to keep their mouths shut, but always let their lips lose.

Dysphoria and estrogen based hormones' never mixed well.

You just wanted it to stop. All of it. The pain, the thoughts, your body. It felt like everything was against you, so you wanted to try and fight back.

Hurt the one that was hurting you.

Only problem was you let the knife slip and slide too much.

You were getting cold.. It was getting so cold.

Was that..? Fall Out Boy? Yeah.. It was your phone.

Just up there on the sink, across the dark room.

Ah, everything was getting darker. You.. couldn’t move your legs. It took so much energy to raise a finger to attempt to raise your body.

You couldn’t. It was too much. You tried to lift your head from watching the buzzing phone, but it did the opposite.

Oh, the floor was so red. Was.. this your blood?

You really made a mess. You couldn’t even see the bare flooring.

“P...Paps..?” You called out, voice sounding so faint as the attempt at words made your head dizzy.

Your chest was really starting to hurt now.

“P...pa...py...”

Keeping your eyes open took so much work now.. You were so tired. You would just.. close them for a moment.

That moment turned into minutes, that ringtone song Phoenix playing over, before your phone fell to the ground and shattered meters away. Not that you saw.

Vaguely, you heard some pounding. Was that.. your front door?

A loud bang followed this, but you more felt than heard it.

You wondered who it was.

Wait.. They’d see the mess you made. Oh no, no, no! They didn’t need to see this. Your eyes opened a sliver, seeing that the red liquid had spread even further now.

An attempt at a word that came out in a small whine-type breath was the closest you got to actual English.

You lived alone. Had for years, so there was no reason to lock your doors. But, that may have been your endings downfall.

As your vision blurred, you barely caught sight of a tall, lanky being barreling into the room. Was that.. Noir? “Nn...N..” It was too hard. But, your question was answered.

Arms wrapped around you, pulling you up and close to a soft, but hard, chest. Red seemed to appear above you, before a dampness fell onto your face. Was.. he crying? Noir never cried. Never.

His voice was so muddled in your ears, but you caught a few words. “Name,” “stay,” “why,” “no.”

You finally managed a clear view. He was crying. Large tears spilling over his sockets. Your gaze then trailed down and you couldn’t help but feel shame. You bloodied his nice blazer and shirt. Great going, Name!

Probably stained his shoes too. How would you pay him that much money? His tops and footwear cost two paycheck combined, at least.

But, strength left you as your body felt lighter, feeling movement as he seemed to walk, then something covering you. A towel, maybe.

“P-Pa...p...y..” That’s all you muttered as you lost vision, sound, and feeling.

When you awoke, you felt confusion, then recollection, and then shame. Yo failed again! It’s like you can’t do shit right! But, before you could continue your mental abuse, a sob left someone nearby.

Turning your head, catching sight of none other than the one who walked in on the scene. Noir. His sockets were rimmed redder than normal, his eyelights seemed irritated but from tears rather than the emotion, and., most surprising of all, his shirt collar was messed up.

His gaze was on you, before you felt arms wrap around your body, a hiss leaving your mouth from the contact. He immediately pulled away, looking down to see both your chest.. flatter, and wrapped up.

“I Was Planning On Saving For Your Birthday..” Noir started, leaning closer to you, as if he never wanted anything to push him away. “But.. I Guess Now Is Best.”

You were confused, before he explained he had top surgery done on you alongside the stitching that needed done to ensure you didn’t bleed out. Your.. birthday was around the corner. You just had to go and ruin the surprise, di-

Before your mind could finish it’s track, a mouth pressed itself to your lips, stopping you. “Stop That.” He ordered sternly, a hidden gentleness behind his tone. “You Get This Dreadful Look When You’re Thinking Bad.”

Finally, after watching him for a few seconds, tears welled up in your eyes before pouring out. Noir immediately had his arms wrapped around you again, although much lighter in pressure. He never left you alone after that, nor had you gone a week without calling a therapist.

#undertale #mafiafell #papyrus #Noir #triggering #trans #dysphoria #tw: self half #tw: dysphoria #tw: body horror

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mythicaldemigoddess-of-deltarune · 3 years

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My Feelings About Bradford Buzzard And His Grandmother

First, If No One Has Seen The Last Episode of The Final Season of Ducktales Reboot with the Last Adventure, do not read this unless you seen that episode first.

okay here goes...

My feelings on Bradford's Grandmother, I don't like her.

she is the reason Bradford became the way he is in the first place.

plus whenever Bradford tried to reason with Scrooge, he got ignored, so of

course he had to use the papyrus to make Scrooge, Della and Donald forget he was ever there. even if he did transform into a monster,

it wouldn't be because he's evil. it would be from the negative emotions and the misinterpretation people have of him, so he isn't truly a villain, if anything he is a victim and that jerk of a Finch is the root of it all.

Even if she is Scrooge's hero, but even he would need to accept that she was a insensitive woman who caused a child trauma that led him to grow-up cold and truly alone.

Yes Bradford made mistakes, but he was blinded.

He tried to keep chaos from going out of control, even if it meant doing something that would hurt a family, which he shouldn't of did and that had crossed a line.

I don't believe that Bradford was truly evil, he was just a broken soul who wanted to stop dangerous adventures and possibly save those like him from suffering the same trauma he suffered since his childhood.

No one has to agree with me, but I just feel that most villains have good in them.

And most of their trauma and suffering are caused by the good guys or the main hero/heroine.

Plus No Hero or Heroine should be above the consequences of damaging someone else's life,

Either they be another hero or villain or a neutral party.

Scrooge wasn't truly at fault for what happen to Della, but if you think about it, it was 100% Della's.

She could of not stole the ship, but she did. and it because she chose to listen to the one who told her of the surprise, she could of chose to ignore it and act surprise later, and not cause her family to end up they it did.

Scrooge didn't mean for to become lost in space, but he isn't excused for some truly heartless things he has done in the past because of his greed before he found the true greatest treasure, which is his family.

He hurt Magica, and I believe the reason why they had that fight so long ago in the series, is because she wanted to get him back for what happen to her brother.

Even if Louie made a good point, that his villains/enemies, made him a better person.

That still doesn't excuse him for purposely not helping someone who asked for help, even saying they give him anything if he help them.

The pain that Scrooge felt when he lost Della, was perhaps the same feeling that Magica felt when she lost her brother and never saw him again.

I believe that the Phantom Blot, might really be Mr Vanderquack, Bentina Beakley's son-in-law,

Who is now a widow, who lost his wife and Bentina's biological granddaughter, before Webby came along.

But the biological granddaughter could of survived, while Edna Beakley-Vanderquack did not.

the reason why Blot wants to destroy all magic and Magica,

might have to do with the fact that he lost his wife Edna and his child.

If the incident happen before Webby was born, then I think Pepper might really be Bentina's Granddaughter.

But all that is just a theory. if the story picks up in a Darkwing Duck Reboot and reveals that the theory about Phantom Blot being Mr Vanderquack, the widow of Edna, and Pepper being his long-lost daughter is true....then I guess I would be surprised.

But yeah back to the whole Isabella Finch, she is truly not as great as everyone makes her.

She caused Bradford to become who he is, and she couldn't see the damage it would cause later in his life.

Plus I believe that there was a reason why we saw a clone of Bradford, the real Bradford might of known what would happen if he faced Scrooge, so he used that ray thing that makes someone smart or dumb,

Shot it at his clone that looked 100% like him, then sent the clone to deal with Scrooge, while the Real Bradford himself sneaked away unseen by both sides.

If that theory is true, then maybe it will show it in the reboot of Darkwing Duck.

I hope some of you understand my view on Bradford, at first when it was revealed he was a part of FOWL, I did thought he was a villain. but after the episode that first showed that papyrus, and even showing a bit more of his past...but perhaps not all of it.

I don't view Bradford as someone who is evil, just someone who is deeply hurt and tried to do good but ended up hurting others in his quest to achieve it.

Yes he did wrong in his life, and he was blinded by his ambition that cost him in the end.

And we should try to remember, he wouldn't be that way if it wasn't for that insensitive Isabella Finch.

Once more, no one has to agree with my feelings about it. but I still find that Finch is my least favorite character in the Ducktales 2017 Continuum.

one of the tags for this is “True Monster” and to me,

Isabella Finch was the true monster.

Bradford was her victim, and she couldn’t see that her adventures that she dragged him on, was making him unhappy and would place stress, trauma and fear in his life, and making him go down a dark path just to keep the whole world safe.

Bradford wasn’t even truly evil, just broken and emotionally hurt.

which Della, Beakley, Scrooge and the rest of the family and friends couldn’t open their hearts and eyes enough to see.

it is possible the only one who could see it, was Magica.

because the way she said that he wasn’t a villain.

I can’t agree with the actions of those who are suppose to be “Good”

but end up hurting those who are just hurt themselves.

Discord didn’t even get a proper punishment,

he, Celestia and Luna just made the three scapegoats of his actions, get turned to stone, and Star Butterfly despite the fact that her and her family have misused magic for who knows how long of generations,

she chooses to move the blame from her Mother,

to magic itself, who let me remind you everyone, is not truly at fault, but those like Star and her family who wield it.

and if you misuse that power, it is your fault, not the source of the realm your magic comes from.

at least Lena was able to do better than what Star did, I still love SVTFOE

(and still hope to get a complete dvd collection of SVTFOE someday.)

and the last episode was still good, but I can’t agree with placing blame on magic, when it was Moon who misused it and caused so many lives to be in danger, and even ended up with Quirky dying.

Steven Quartz Universe, he went through trauma in his life that caused him to end up the way he turned out in Steven Universe Future.

I for one, love both the first series, the movie and Steven Universe Future.

the Steven Universe Future brought out some truth of Steven, that some can relate to and understand but maybe not fully.

because of what was revealed in Steven Universe Future,

about Greg’s past, I see him as both a Good and yet Bad person.

same with how Rose was during her life, as both when she was Pink Diamond,

and then when she reformed as “Rose Quartz”, which I still think that would make her a Trans-Gem, like gems who are normally be made one way, might feel like they are either a Rose Quartz, a Ruby or even a Zircon.

but the episode where we learn a bit more of Greg’s past, like how he felt about his parents and how he viewed their rules and how it seem like a prison to him.

but he might of only seen what he wanted to see, he might not of got the full picture growing up, and I had theorized that one of his parents could of been sensitive to loud music/sound, it is possible that Greg couldn’t understand.

Steven had a right to be mad at Greg, and even disappointed in him too.

Greg had cheered him up, and even made him happy finding out about his father’s old home.

but Greg made his son go back down to his lows again.

it was good that it was revealed that Steven is getting the help he needs.

when he corrupted himself, it was good that no one tried to hurt him

but hugged him when he needed that emotional support.

the kind that shows that those who are his family and friends, are there for him and are sorry they couldn’t see how much pain he was going through.

at times when a character who is normally a villain, and shows no sign of goodness in them (unlike Chrysalis, Cozy Glow and Tirek showed when they bonded in one episode....who had shown a side of good that was in them.)

they can’t be saved...

I wont force others to agree on my view on all this, just try to respect that is how I see it.

not all villains are evil, some end up being Anti-Villains,

just as how some heroes who aren’t always good, end up as Anti-Heroes.

even if Isabella Finch was long gone in the world of Ducktales 2017,

but to me she was the root of Bradford’s suffering and trauma.

and that makes her the woman behind the man, and the true villain.

now I am gonna just go and sign off and have me time.

I might sign back on later or tomorrow, it depends.

and I really hope some of you will understand how I view Bradford,

yes at first I thought of him as a villain after it turned out he was FOWL.

but then after seeing the other sides of him, I can’t help but understand he was misunderstood and he only wanted to protect the world from danger.

(he just ended up going about it the wrong way, and went too far in the wrong ways to achieve that peace.)

and his grandmother Isabella, Ludwig, Scrooge, everyone, including the rest of FOWL, couldn’t see that.

I hope that at least such a thing gets resolved in a darkwing duck reboot.

and the Bradford we saw in the very end, turned out to be one of his clones.

because I believe that Bradford deserved better, he was not born that way, he was made that way because of his so called grandmother, who couldn’t see that she was making him unhappy and causing him trauma.

well thanks for listening, and once again no one has to agree about my feeling about Bradford or Isabella Finch,

or the whole theory about Phantom Blot being Bentina’s son-in-law,

who she thought died along with her daughter and granddaughter....

well the granddaughter she had before taking Webby in.

see ya later and keep safe everybody.

#ducktales 2017 #bradford buzzard #isabella finch #theories #true monster

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calliecat93 · 4 years

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Callie’s Disney Princess Retrospective: The Little Mermaid

(Snow White) (Cinderella) (Sleeping Beauty)

By the time of 1989, The Walt Disney Company was in it’s Dark Age. Walt had passed, the Nine Old Men were retiring, and their films were viewed as jokes. The Dark Age tends to get what I feel is an overly harsh reputation, but that’s not what we’re here for. The cold hard truth is Disney was a shadow of its former self. Their films just weren’t getting the same praise as they once did, and now with Don Bluth gaining success, with films like An American Tale and The Land Before Time, they weren’t even the top studio anymore. Their lowest point was the colossal failure of The Black Cauldron and while films like The Great Mouse Detective earned some praise, it was just never enough. They’d start getting some steam with Who Framed Roger Rabbit? but considering that they commissioned Richard William’s studio in England over Disney’s own animation studio, it seemed that even the company itself was losing faith in their own talents.

That all changed, however, with the release of their 28th animated feature. This would be the film that changed everything. It brought Disney back into prominence after years of being laughing stocks. It would enter the animation medium into its Renaissance, a time still fondly remembered by many. And for the purposes of this series, it is the film that both resurrected and revitalized the Disney Princess franchise. All of this would be due to 1989’s The Little Mermaid.

Overview

Ariel is a mermaid, but she dreams of one day being able to be part of the human world. Always collecting whatever surface world treasures she can find, to her father’s disapproval, Ariel one day stumbles upon a ship celebrating the birthday of the handsome Prince Eric. It’s love at first sight, but as he is a human, her father King Triton reacts negatively. Hurt, Ariel goes to the sea witch Ursula, who grants her human legs at the cost of her voice. To remain human, Ariel has three days to get Eric to fall in love with her and kiss her. But Ursula has her own wicked plans for Ariel, plans that will endanger both land and sea. Will Ariel be able to get Eric to fall in love with her and become part of his world? Or will Ursula triumph?

Review

youtube

I have been waiting for this day for SO LONG. Do you want to know why I decided to do this series, to begin with? Aside from 2020 driving me to insanity? It’s because while the complaints against the Disney Princesses in general have frustrated me for as long as I can remember, there were two in particular that always made my blood boil because they made no sense. Cinderella was the first one, which I already covered. The other? Ariel. I think you all know what I’m referring to here, but let’s put a pin in it for now. We have a LOT to discuss before we get to analyzing Ariel herself. First, let's go over the film.

The film is based on the story of the same name by Hans Christian Anderson. Walt himself had actually planned it long before, but sadly was never able to make it a reality. When the directors pitched it, at first it was denied due to Disney having already releasing a mermaid film called Splash not too long ago. But it was allowed to continue to be worked on as a future project and after a great deal of tweaking, expansion, and reworking, it was approved as a feature film to come out after Oliver and Company. There were a LOT of changes from the original story. The sea witch went from neutral to the villain, characters were expanded and added, and of course the story of unrequited love that ended with the little mermaid committing suicide was thrown out all together. A lot of the story basis was still there, but Disney was taking it and making it their own arguably even moreso than with the Classic Three.

The animation is fantastic. Many of the films prior like The Rescuers and Oliver and Company, while they looked nice, had this… roughness to it. I mean they were outright recycling animation for a good while, with Robin Hood being the biggest example. But the animation here is some of the nicest, most fluid that they’ve had in quite a long time. It’s colorful, expressive, and grand in feel. This is especially true with the musical numbers. I mean Under the Sea has SO much going on, and it is a true spectacle! It’s especially prominent when Ariel is mute. Since she can’t express herself with words, the animation had to be on point so that we could still understand her thoughts and feelings. They did an amazing job. From things like her visual glee at being human when going to bed the first night, to her annoyingly blowing her bangs during the canoe ride, turning into excited glee when Eric guesses her name. It helps Ariel feel more like a three-dimensional character and illustrates everything to us that words couldn’t at that point.

The biggest animation challenge for this film would be to convincingly portray the illusion of being under water. They had to convince us that Ariel was living under the sea, and I’d say they did a pretty good job. It is no easy task and trying to describe it is… hard. But I never had any doubt that they were underwater, especially compared to the scenes that were on the surface/ just look at how Ariel's hair is constantly flowing compared to how it sits when on the surface. It’s that attention to detail that I always appreciate. The opening especially, seeing the underwater landscape thriving as we see the silhouetted merpeople until the grand reveal of King Triton’s castle. Not to mention the seashore setting of Eric’s own castle and kingdom, a perfect match for this sort of movie. As someone who loves water/seaside settings, it’s always a joy to see!

While several of these people worked on the Dark Age films, this is really the first film that allows the then-new talent of Disney to shine. The directors were John Musker and Ron Clements, who are VERY important names to the Princess line. They not only gave us Ariel but also Jasmine, Tiana, and Moana. They’ve been attached to many of Disney’s most beloved films and event cult classics like The Great Mouse Detective and Treasure Planet (both of which you should watch). You also have animators such as Glen Keane, who would go on to animate Pocahontas and Rapunzel and work on some of the future princes (The Beast and Aladdin), and Mark Henn who would animate Belle, Jasmine, Pocahontas (alongside Keane), Mulan, and Tiana. They both would be the supervising animators for Ariel, and go on to have very successful careers in future productions.

But this film also gave us what may have been the best decision that the new management ever made. For the music, they hired lyricist Howard Ashman, who chose composer Alan Menken to collaborate with him. I cannot stress enough how important these two’s contributions were for this (and the next film we’ll be discussing) production, especially the former. Ashman became very passionate about this project and was very influential on it’s direction to the point of being credited as a producer. Menken of course would go on to have a LONG, successful career as a composer on many of the Renaissance films. Many of which we’ll be touching on in this retrospective. These guys won two Oscars for The Little Mermaid for a reason.

I haven’t talked a whole lot about the music in these films outside a little bit about the main song. That’s because while not unimportant, the music didn’t really move the story along. Like Someday My Prince Will Come/ is cute, but does it really drive anything forward? Or tell us anything about Snow White that we didn’t already know from I’m Wishing? Not really. Ashman, using his stage musical experience, wanted to use that kind of styling with The Little Mermaid. To use music to add depth to both the characters and to the story. We’re all used to most Disney films being this Broadway-esque spectacle nowadays, but this film was the first to truly do so. Considering how this formula is still being used to this day, I think it’s safe to say that it was VERY successful. Again, the music won two Oscars for a reason. Heck for a LONG time, the music was all that Disney was able to win from The Academy, so that says a LOT as to how good this was.

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So now that we’ve made it here, I’m going to discuss the vocal tracks individually and give my thoughts on each of the major ones:

Fathoms Below: Might be the most underrated song of the bunch. It’s in the style of a sea-shanty discussing the legends of what is below the sea. It’s a great intro to the film, letting us know right off the bat what kind of movie we are in for. I know that it sure had me invested~

Part of Your World/Reprise: I’m gonna go more into depth on the song’s meanings when we analyze Ariel, but this song is perfect. It’s the song that tells us Ariel’s wants and dreams and Jodi Benson does such a great job putting so many different emotions into it. The animators also did a fantastic job with the expressions, fully showcasing Ariel’s longing, sadness, and desperation to be part of a world that she cannot. The reprise equally does a great job showcasing her evolving revolve, going from ‘longing’ to ‘determined’. The song is fondly remembered for a reason… and it almost didn’t make it into the film. During screen testings, Jeffrey Katzenberg (the studio head at the time) wanted the sequence cut as the kid audience was ‘bored’ and ‘restless’. The directors and Ashman HEAVILY disagreed and argued back, with Glen Keane ultimately being the one to convince Katzenberg to keep the scene. Thank God for it because this adds such a strong, emotional core to both the story and to Ariel’s character and it would have taken so much away if removed. I love it~

Under the Sea: This was the number that won the Oscar. I… find it the most overrated track tbh. Not that it’s bad, FAR from it. It’s probably the best animation-wise with how much is going on. Sebastian somehow managed to conduct… all the sea life into a mass spectacle that certainly had me convinced to living under the sea. The calypso style is very fitting and fun, and Samuel E Wright sings it with so much passion. I guess that I find it overrated because I just like other songs more, but this is still a true showstopper that’s worth revisiting.

Poor Unfortunate Souls: Aside from I think Cruella DeVille (and even then Roger’s the one singing it), I think that this is the first true villain song in a Disney film. If so, then they started on a GLORIOUS note. I love this song! It was THE perfect song for Ursula. The first half with her fake reformed villain act but with this condescending air to it (Pat Carroll’s delivery with the ‘Pathetic’ line is perfection) was already grand, but the second half? Pat Carroll just lets loose and goes utterly insane. It is AMAZING and has so much charisma to it that you can’t help but be invested. It’s also very creepy, especially in the end with Ursula's cauldron bubbling and especially how she takes Ariel’s voice. This would inspire many great villain songs in the future and to this day remains one of the all-time greats.

Les Poissons: I never thought that seeing a chef cook would be so horrifying… the song is fine. It’s a silly sequence, albeit morbid from poor Sebastian’s perspective, and Rene Auberjonois did a fantastic job despite the song being pretty short. It’s my least favorite track, mainly because it doesn’t really add or enhance anything. But it was fun… poor Senastian though XD

Kiss the Girl: The love song of the film. I love the animation for this one. I mean what’s more romantic than taking a canoe out on the lake? That’s where I’d want my first date to end! The mood is set so well with the use of shadows and once more, Sebastian is able to conduct a spectacle effortlessly. Once more Samuel E Wright does a fabulous job singing, this time with a serenade style. Even if poor Scuttle didn’t get the appreciation that he deserved. Let the seagull sing, dang it! The only thing that ruins it is the eels capsizing the canoe, jerks! But yeah a beautiful serenade that is bound to convince anyone to… well, kiss the girl XD

And that’s not even getting into Alan Menken’s score! Alan Menken is my favorite composer of all time, so I love everything that he has ever done. I still remember the opening, hearing the instrumental of Part of Your World and immediately became invested in this film. The man is an EGOT for a reason, and this is only one of the many fantastic soundtracks that we’ll be discussing in this review. He also did some additional music for the Broadway version of the film, and there’s a whole body of demo work that he and Ashman did that you can probably find on Youtube, Spotify, or whatever music streaming service you use. Listen to Ashman’s rendition of Part of Your World, you WILL be driven to tears.

So now we get to characters… and HO BOY do we have a lot. For the sake of this review we will be going over King Triton, Sebastian, Flounder, Scuttle, Ursula, Prince Eric, and as per usual Ariel will have her own section at the end.

King Triton, while not evil, serves as an antagonist early on in the film. By all appearances, Triton is a capable ruler who wields a great deal of power due to his triton. He appears just, and for the most part he is as well as a caring father. The only problem is… well, his anger issues. Triton HATES humans and the surface world. We’re never told why aside from him calling them ‘fish-eaters’ (the DTV prequel suggests it’s due to the death of his wife, but the canonicity is debatable), but considering that his youngest daughter’s greatest passion is learning about the surface world… yeah. Needless to say, they have issues between them. But he is otherwise loving and was even excited that Ariel may have found love until he found out about their species. With how overprotective he is, that was a nice subversion despite how brief it was.

Triton often gets the ‘abusive’ label thrown against him and while I do think that that’s a little too strong, there is no denying that his hatred and anger affects Ariel emotionally. He may have seen destroying Ariel’s grotto as for her own good and is likely the culmination of however long Ariel’s been going to the surface finally boiling over. But to do this right in front of her when she is begging him to stop and outright ridiculing her for saving Eric’s life… yeah. It’s… it’s a horrifying scene that does NOT make Triton look good and is what pushes Ariel into seeing Ursula. It doesn’t matter the reason, destroying your children’s things is something that WILL scar them emotionally. To be far, the moment Ariel breaks down Triton clearly realizes that he crossed the line, but he just leaves because… yeah there was NO WAY that they were reaching a reconciliation at that moment.

Triton has a lot of issues, but the reason I don’t call him abusive and like him as a character is because after the grotto scene, he was clearly remorseful. After Ariel goes missing, he outright says ‘What have I done?” and his demeanor expresses a lot of remorse. If that wasn’t enough, I think that him both selling his soul to free Ariel AND turning her human after realizing how much she loved Eric more than showed that he has learned his lesson. Triton had to learn to allow Ariel to grow up and choose her own direction in life, even if he didn’t like said direction. It’s very relatable to how some parents struggle to let go of their children as they grow up. My only real complaint is, as I said, we don’t know why Triton hates humans so much. If we did and saw him work through it, it may have helped us understand why he was so against Ariel’s passions and not come off as needlessly cruel as he did. Nevertheless, he realized his wrongs and made it right. His hug with Ariel at the end is one that gets me every time.

The sidekicks of the film are Flounder, Scuttle, and Sebastian. IDK why they named Flounder Flounder because he isn’t… well, a flounder. He looks like some kind of tropical fish. Flounder is kind of the kid appeal character, even being voiced by a child in all incarnations except Return to the Sea since he had grown up. He is Ariel’s best friend who goes with her on her adventures, despite almost always being easily frightened. He’s well-meaning, but can cause more trouble like when he accidentally exposed Ariel’s excursion during the concert. But he’s also a sweet little guy and very loyal to Ariel. The kid outright went out of his way to somehow recover the Eric statue, which is ten times his size, and deliver it to her grotto to make her happy. That is friendship. He doesn’t really develop, but he’s a nice supporting character.

Scuttle is… well, dumb. But a fun dumb. He’s a surface creature and thus has more knowledge about surface world items than Ariel does… except he doesn’t. He’s not smart, but they manage to keep him entertaining because he’s so sure that he knows what he’s talking about. Imo, dinglehoppers are a MUCH better name for forks than forks, dang it! He tries to help, like it was his idea to try the serenade during the canoe ride… too bad that he can’t hold a note. Poor bird tried. They also DO allow him to be useful at the end, discovering that Ursula had tricked Eric and he amassed one heck of an army to humiliate her long enough for Ariel to reach the ship. It is one of the funniest AND most awesome moments in the whole film. Scuttle is just fun comedic relief who doesn’t overstay his welcome and his VA Buddy Hackett did such a great job~

But if there’s any character aside from Ariel that we remember from this film, it’s Sebastian. This Jamaican crab is the royal musical conductor and Triton’s advisor. He’s often the one who has to watch over Ariel, which clearly frustrates him on multiple occasions. Tbh, Sebastian probably has the most character development in the film. In the beginning, while understandably upset that Ariel being a no-show ruined his conducting debut (though tbf… NO ONE bothered to make sure she was in place? Really?), he’s mainly upset that /he/ looked bad. After the storm, he’s more concerned about getting into trouble with Triton than about Ariel herself. He knows how much the human world means to her, and while one can argue that Ariel /should/ be more aware of how her actions affect others, Sebastian isn’t much better. He only discourages her to save his own shell, not for her own good. Which eventually leads to him breaking and exposing what happened during the storm when he should know damn well that Triton will explode. Yeah it was because he misunderstood, but still.

However, Sebastian isn’t a bad crab. After the grotto's destruction, he immediately feels guilty and tries to apologize to Ariel, but she angrily dismisses him. He tries to convince Ariel to not go to Ursula, but as she’s still upset she bitterly brushes him off and tells him to get her father since he’s good at that. He therefore follows with only Flounder and at first, panics after Ariel is human. It’s understandable because… yeah, that’s bad. His first reaction is to get Triton to fix this, with Ariel trying to stop him. Once he sees the heartbroken look on her face, Sebastian realizes just how miserable Ariel would be back home. At this point, it's reasonable to assume that Triton will only be stricter about letting her have her ventures, and thus she’d be stuck in an unhappy life. This, along with the situation at least being partially his fault, convinces Sebastian to hold off and help Ariel win Eric over. Which he certainly tries his best.

One of my favorite scenes is Ariel going to bed and being so excited to experience these new things as Sebastian tries to advise her on getting Eric to kiss her. But he stops when he sees that Ariel has fallen asleep with the biggest smile on her face, and he just affectionately calls her a ‘hopeless child’. The affection in his expressions and Samuel E Wright’s delivery is just so sincere and it really shows that for all his bluster, Sebastian does care for Ariel. The crab is also a seriously talented conductor. Like I said, he put together both Under the Sea AND Kiss the Girl in zero time and they’re both amazing numbers because of it. He really tries hard to help Ariel and once Ursula strikes again, he decides it’s finally been long enough and gets King Triton. Sure that doesn’t go well, but at that point it was absolutely the right call. He also helps fight off Flotsam and Jetsam, willing to put himself in harm’s way to help both Ariel and Eric.

Sebastian became a much more understanding, more selfless crab over the course of the film, realizing that he needs to care less about saving his own skin and to understand why Ariel does what she does. It’s especially notable at the end. In the beginning, he advised Triton to keep a firm grip on Ariel when he asks if he was too harsh. At the end? He advises him that children have to be free to lead their own lives, which is what convinces Triton to grant Ariel legs. It’s a really nice character arc and this along with Sebastian’s two spectacular musical numbers leaves no question as to why he’s so beloved.

But what’s a great film without a great villain? For that we get one of the best, Ursula the Sea Witch. She is a fantastic villainess. She’s a large octopus woman who used to work in the palace, but for reasons unknown got banished. In early versions, she was going to be Triton’s sister which would have added a VERY twisted dynamic to the whole thing. Maybe that’s where they got the idea for Scar in The Lion King… anyways! Her design was based on Drag Queen Divine who was also going to be the VA for Ursula, but she sadly passed away of an enlarged heart before any recording to be done. After going through various performers, the production staff settled on actress Pat Carroll, who did a spectacular job. You can just tell that she is loving every single second of this role, and she has always happily returned whenever they need new Ursula material like in House of Mouse or in the parks. Just listen as she goes off the chain in Poor Unfortunate Souls that is some amazing acting.

Ursula is confident, manipulative, and a true actress. Her entire gimmick is manipulating vulnerable, insecure people into making deals with her. Deals that are pretty much impossible to keep and thus, she claims them as hers and adds them to her ‘garden’. She targets Ariel specifically because of her passion for the surface world and since she likely knows of Triton’s hatred for it AND of his anger problems, she’s just waiting for the day he screws up and Ariel is vulnerable. I’m gonna go MUCH more in depth with this when we get to Ariel, but this is SO important to note. Ursula struck when Ariel was hurt, emotional, and not thinking straight. It shows just how manipulative she can be. This is who she preys on. She knows how to sway them to act how she wants them to. She’s a saleswoman, and BOY does she sell it. It doesn't help that she gives Ariel very little personal space and manipulates her feelings for Eric to be further swayed. Yet Ariel is the stupid one because she was manipulated by a master manipulator… patience Callie, you’re gonna be able to let it out soon enough…

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Ursula works so well as a villain because of how smart and manipulative she is. Like I said, she knows how to prey on the vulnerable and insecure. But she also knows when to get herself involved. After Ariel almost kisses Eric on the second day, Ursula disguises herself and uses Ariel’s voice to hypnotize Eric. And even though Scuttle and his undersea army humiliate her and Ariel gets her voice back, she bought just enough time for the sun to set and the spell breaks. Ursula won. She captured Ariel, forced Triton to sell himself to save his daughter, and claimed ultimate power. It was a truly methodical plan that ultimately succeeded. You gotta give her props for that.

Don’t make any mistakes though. While Ursula is intelligent and confident, she /is/ still evil. I’ve seen people say that she should have won just because they don’t like the ‘abusive tyrant’ Triton. Aside from what I already said about Triton above, Ursula is shown to be far, FAR worse. I mean… I hate to use the term, but she essentially s***-shames Ariel throughout Poor Unfortunate Souls. I mean she outright calls her a ‘little tramp’ after the canoe scene, which in this context is a G-Rated way of calling her a s***. To a sixteen year old. Yeah… plus we saw how power-mad she went once she got the triton, and it didn’t bode well for either land or sea. Triton’s temperamental, but he isn’t a tyrant. Ursula’s only redeeming trait is that she DOES care for her henchmen Flotsam and Jetsam, and their death at Ariel’s hand is what provoked her to go mad with power. This was ultimately her undoing as she was so focused on tormenting Ariel that it allowed Eric to take his ship and kill her. It’s a pretty gruesome Disney Villain Death (we outright see her SKELETON FLASHING at one point), but she brought it upon herself.

If you asked me what villain helped shape many of the ones we got during the Renaissance… I’d say Professor Ratigan from The Great Mouse Detective. But Ursula was the first Renaissance villain, and she started it off right. She’s enjoyable enough that we love it when she’s on screen, but still detestable enough that we want her to lose. Many complain about doing ‘purely evil’ villains. That villains HAVE to be sympathetic or nuanced, otherwise they are poorly written. While there’s nothing wrong with sympathetic, or even redeemable villains, having a purely evil one is also perfectly fine. Disney is the master of this. Ursula’s motivation is strictly to gain power, but it works because they give her character so much personality and charisma. Petty motivation, but excellent character writing that makes us not mind. I’d say if you want to learn how to do a Pure Evil character right, study Ursula in particular along with Jafar and Hades. They’re all great examples of how to do it right.

Finally we come to our leading man, Prince Eric. So far the Disney Princes have acted more as a necessity than anything. It’s as I said in the Sleeping Beauty Review, Florian and Charming fill out a plot point and while he was more proactive in comparison, Phillip fell into the same trap. Did Eric finally break the curse? Well… yes and no. He's a firm middle ground between ‘necessity’ and ‘actual character’. He’s allowed FAR more than any of the other princes thus far. Eric is a seasman, he loves going out on the ocean in his ships. He’s adventurous, good-looking, and an overall nice guy. We see that he isn’t really into fancy stuff, outright cringing when Grimsby unveils the statue. He also isn’t interested in Grimsby trying to set him up with various noble women. Like Jasmine and to a degree Prince Charming, he wants to find love for love, but on his own time. These are the traits that attract Ariel to him. Plus he’s also heroic, going back to a BURNING SHIP in order to save his dog Max… yeah I’d fall in love with him too.

After Ariel saves him, Eric becomes determined to find her. But he only briefly saw her face and heard her voice. Funny how NO ONE gets on Eric for this while hating on Ariel, but again we’ll get to that soon enough. When he meets Ariel he recognizes her face… but since she can’t talk, assumes that she can’t be the mystery girl. Still, being a good person, he takes her back to the palace to give her shelter. It’s not long before he becomes endeared by her though. She’s pretty, sweet, and even though she can’t talk he has a good time showing her around the kingdom. It's so clear by /Kiss the Girl/ that he has fallen for her, to the point that even Grimsby points it out to him. It gets him to give up on the mystery girl which is VERY important. It shows us that Eric didn’t fall for Ariel because she happened to be the girl he was looking for, but because of who she is as a person. It shows the audience that his feelings are genuine which makes us further root for him and Ariel… too bad that Ursula goes and ruins it.

As far as personality goes, Eric is more fun than his predecessors, but he’s still stuck with the standard prince-like personality. He’s given more lines than all of them combined and has a real charm to him. You can see why Ariel would like a guy like him. He’s kind, fun, adventurous, and even a little rebellious. He is her ideal vision of what humans are like. The end of the film lets him prove himself as well, going out to help Ariel despite the danger and of course using his own ship to kill Ursula. It does cause Ariel to be a bit of a Damsel in Distress, but she DID save him much earlier and she stops Ursula from blasting him to smithereens, so it balances out. It was enough to prove himself to Triton, at least. So Eric is a nice step up as far as princes go, but we’re not quite out of the well with them yet. But it won’t be much longer, heehee XD

There’s other supporting characters that I really don't have much to say about. Ariel’s sisters are nicely designed, but ultimately bland. I think the series and Ariel’s Beginning did more with them, but otherwise there’s not anything to discuss. Grimsby is fine enough, being the closest thing that Eric has to a parental figure (where ARE Eric’s parents in all of this anyways?) and is stuffy, but otherwise a decent guy. Chef Louie is… crazy. That’s all that I can say. This film has a lot of characters, let’s put it that way. But of course, we have one more to go over. The titular little mermaid herself. I’ve been hinting at this throughout the review, so I think you all know exactly how this will go…

Ariel Analysis

I cannot stress enough how massive a step Ariel was for the Disney Princess line. As much as I have defended the Classic Three and standby all of that, there is certainly some repetition going one with them. All three are beautiful, passive, and can’t directly do much to accomplish their dreams. And at least two of them are dreaming mainly about a man, which is NOT a bad thing, but it was certainly getting old. Feminism has also been evolving since 1959, the last time a Disney Princess film came out. A lot had changed in those thirty years. Women in media could now be more proactive, take matters into their own hands, and have their own hopes and dreams that weren’t just about love while still being allowed to find love. Simply put, as much as I love Snow White, Cinderella, and Aurora, the times had changed and it was time for Disney to get with those times. Thus we got Ariel, and she was exactly the right princess to take the line into a whole new direction.

The beginning of the film is a pretty clever way to set her up. The Classic Three are known for being angelic singers, and for good reason. It’s pretty much the first thing they do when we meet them (well, as an adult in Aurora’s case) so the concert sets this up. It’s Ariel’s ‘debut” and her sisters all have the looks and angelic voices that fit the archetypal Disney Princess. But then the shell opens up… and is empty. Then we cut to Ariel, who is about to go inside a sunken ship to look for surface world artifacts. It is an excellent subversion, setting up a Classic Princess move and flipping it on it’s head. It’s shown very quickly that Ariel is adventurous and actively seeking out her dreams despite her situation instead of trying to just make do with the way things were and hoping for the best. We also get a fun sequence of her and Flounder escaping a shark, so first time a Princess got an action scene as well.

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The film very quickly establishes Ariel’s love and fascination with the surface world. Exploring sunken ships, going to Scuttle to get more information, later we see her grotto that is filled with so many items that we would consider standard, but that she considers treasures. These mean so much to her. She finds the surface world ‘wonderful’. But there are setbacks and consequences for her actions, in this case her forgetting about the concert. She didn't mean to and feels bad about it, and Flounder mentioning the reason why didn’t help. It’s clear that Ariel and Triton have been arguing about this for a long time, the latter failing to understand how much this means to Ariel and is at his wit’s end. His demands for her to stop upset her, causing her to storm out of the throne room and head for her grotto.

This leads to Part of Your World. This song/sequence is vital to understand Ariel’s character. This is the song where she expresses all her hopes and dreams. How she wants to be human. How she wants to learn more about the surface world. How she wants to experience things like walking down a street or finding out how a fire can burn. Throughout the film, we never learn how Ariel got so interested in human culture and just why she’s so passionate about it. But we really don’t need an in-depth explanation because this song conveys so much sincerity and emotion that it makes us believe in her passion. We understand how much this matters to her, and in turn it makes it matter to us. It’s why if it had gotten removed, it would have robbed Ariel of this depth and in turn, rob the film of something essential to its story. Thank God it remained intact.

This is a good time to talk about Ariel’s voice actress, Jodi Benson. Having originally been in Howard Ashman’s failed musical Smile, she was brought in originally as Ariel’s singing voice before being promoted to also doing the speaking the lines. This was not only her voice acting debut, but as far as I can tell her film debut as well. She did such a lovely job in the role. She perfectly conveys Ariel’s passion, drive, and sincerity while still coming off as a sixteen year old girl. Her singing voice has been rightfully praised, and to this day Ariel is often considered the best singer among the princesses. Benson has gone on to do other voice roles such as Barbie in the Toy Story films, Patsy and Ms. Doe in Camp Lazlo, and Aquagirl in Batman Beyond. She has continued to reprise Ariel to this day when needed and has always expressed so much love and gratitude for the film and her part in it, She’s also supported others who have done the role like Auli’i Cravallho (aka Moana) for the ABC Musical and Halle Bailey for the upcoming live-action remake. She’s a lovely woman and may she continue to do well~

Going back to the film, Ariel finds herself at a ship and this is where she sees Eric for the first time. It’s love at first sight. Of the Renaissance Era Princesses, Ariel is the one who gets the ‘love at first sight’ critique levied at her the most. Belle and Mulan of course didn’t have that issue and I usually see Jasmine and Pocahontas be given a free pass in this regard. Now of the five, The Little Mermaid IS the most blatant with the trope, but let’s look at it through Ariel’s POV. This is the first time that she’s seen so many humans up close. Eric is around her age (to my knowledge, at least. His VA was 16 at the time IIRC). It is very quickly established that Eric is jovial, uninterested in things like statues in his image, rebellious as he has rejected all the women Grimsby has arranged him with, and wants to find love for himself. He has many of the traits that Ariel herself has, being a rebellious, free-spirit teen herself. But most of all he is heroic, as demonstrated when he goes back to his burning ship to save his dog.

In other words, Eric is Ariel’s ideal vision of what people are like. She saves him from drowning, the first time that a Princess has saved her Prince, and is able to look at him more closely. She is clearly infatuated and seeing this man, this good-hearted, handsome young man who is everything that she ever dreamed of. This is what pushes her from just dreaming about being human to swearing that somehow she /will/ be human. Yes, she gets motivated by love, but the goal was there before this moment. It just became a solidified goal. One that she is going to make a reality someway, somehow. She even notes in the Part of Your World Reprise that she doesn’t know when or how, but it doesn’t matter. Compared to how fleeting her hopes were in the main song, the reprise is so much more triumphant and determined and continues to show just how important this truly is to Ariel.

Sadly however she still has one obstacle in between her and her dream; her father. The next day she is so happy and lovesick and it’s really cute, but Sebastian knows that this is going to cause major issues with her father. His big Under the Sea plea goes ignored, and Ariel is led to her grotto by Flounder, who has brought her the Eric statue. She’s so happy and acting like… well, a teenager in love. But unfortunately due to Sebastian jumping the gun, Triton finds out and he is enraged. Not only is he angry that Ariel again went to the surface, but she both saved and fell in love with a human. Thus we get the dark scene of Triton, in his rage, destroying the grotto. Every item, treasure, and relic that Ariel has gathered for who knows how long has become nothing but a pile of dust. Including the statue of the man she loves.

Say what you want about ‘love at first sight’ or Ariel being a lovesick dummy, but this is outright traumatizing. This sixteen year old girl, a girl who aside from forgetting a few engagements has done nothing wrong, had all of her hopes and dreams shattered by her own father all because of his own blind hatred. Imagine being a teenager and your parents destroying everything you love all because they hated something that you loved. Even if Triton regretted it, it doesn’t change the pain that he inflicted upon his own daughter as she breaks down. She’s so upset that she rejects Sebastian trying to apologize and just tells him and Flounder to go away. They comply, leaving Ariel to cry in her now bare grotto… that is, until Flotsam and Jetsam appear.

So.. let’s now talk about Ariel going to Ursula and accepting the deal. First, her going in the first place. When Flotsam and Jetsam bring Ursula up, Ariel… /refuses/ to go. She is aware that Ursula is bad news. She had no intention of going to her at first and outright tells the eels to leave. What makes her agree? The two knocking the remains of the Eric statue in front of her. At this point, Ariel’s pretty much been rejected by her father and all of her treasures that kept her seabound are gone, so… what’s she got left to lose? She follows and naturally Sebastian tries to stop her, but she just angrily tells him to get her father since he’s good at that.

Ariel enters Ursula’s domain, and we come to the scene. Ursula declares to have changed, demonstrates her power, and offers Ariel the deal to become human for three days and it’ll be permanent if Eric kisses her. If Ariel fails, she not only becomes a mermaid again, but she belongs to Ursula. She also has to give up her voice as payment. Now we all know the big criticism against this, that being Ariel selling her voice and leaving behind her family and all that she ever knew and loved… for some prince that she hasn’t even really met yet, let alone spoken to. Now do I see why people dislike this? Yes. It’s a very rash, very stupid decision not just for those factors, but the fact that Ariel is essentially selling herself to the devil for this one thing. None of this is a good thing… but here is the big question, does the film do enough that this makes sense for Ariel’s character? Is this something that I can see her doing?

Yes, yes I can.

Let’s look at this piece by piece. First, Ariel is clearly uncomfortable the entire time that she is in Ursula’s lair. Ursula continuously gets into her personal space, laying on the manipulation at every step. When she lays out the deal, Ariel is at first hesitant. She herself brings up that if she takes it, she’ll likely never see her family again. She’s also hesitant when Ursula lays out the terms of payment, not just because she has no idea how she’d woo Eric without it, but just the concept of losing her voice clearly unnerves her. Look at her face when she grabs at her own throat, she is NOT okay with this. Even when Ursula begins to create the brew and poof sup the contract, Ariel isn’t excited or just jumps to it without thinking. She is VERY CLEARLY hesitant and unnerved about everything.

So… why does she do it then? Well remember, she’s still emotional after her confrontation with her father. Her father has rejected her in her eyes and destroyed everything that she had worked for. At this point, her dreams and feelings for Eric are all that she has. She is hurt, emotional, and desperate and when we are hurt, emotional, and desperate we tend to make rash, even outright stupid decisions. Especially when we’re teenagers. Ursula waited to strike at this very moment for this exact reason; so that Ariel wouldn’t be thinking rationally. These are the exact kind of people that Ursula preys on, and as I said above, she knows how to manipulate them to act how she wants. She gives Ariel the offer of her dreams, assures her that she can woo Eric without talking, poofs Eric’s image up at one point, and makes it clear that she’s giving her very little time to think it over.

With absolutely nothing left to lose and it being clear that her father will never support her dreams, Ariel reluctantly signs the contract. She outright turns her head away when she signs. She KNOWS that she’s making a big choice and she isn’t 100% okay with it. She didn’t just give up her life callously for a man like some like to make out. It was a rash choice, but she had reluctance and fears about it. But it’s the only chance she’ll get to get her dream of being human and being happy, which is what ultimately drives her to make her choice. Given how she risked her life already against a shark, this is in-character for her and shows how far she’ll go for her dreams. And as we’ll see, this is going to have consequences as we near the end of the film.

So the deal is made. Ariel loses her voice and is transformed into a human. Once she makes it to shore, she gets to see her new legs, and for the first time since the confrontation, is happy. She has legs. She is human. The one thing that she had wanted for so, so long has finally come true. Naturally Sebastian wants to get Triton, but she stops him and gives him the saddest, most pleading look that I think I’ve ever seen. This is Ariel’s one and only chance to get what she dreamed of. Triton would not only stop her, but considering what happened before, who knows what else he’d do if he saw her as a human. It is 10% understandable why Ariel doesn't want him involved, especially once it would just lead her back to a life of misery. Sebastian realizes this and agrees to help her, which pretty much gets her to forgive him for what happened before.

Thus, we get to the first true meeting between Ariel and Eric. Of course, Ariel can’t explain who she is because of her voice being gone, so Eric assumes that she can’t be the same girl he saw despite her looking like her. But he sees her in the makeshift dress that Scuttle got her into and assumes that she’s shipwrecked, especially since she can’t walk well. So he takes her to the palace, and Ariel is able to get refreshed and get used to walking on legs. She is clearly delighted by everything. She is now part of the world that she longed for,, and she is loving every second of it. Sure she quickly finds out that forks aren’t combs, but hey she’s learning exactly what she wanted to learn. She is in utter bliss throughout the two days that she’s on the surface, doing thinks like learn to dance and ride a horse-drawn carriage. It’s all she ever hopes it would be.

But of course, Ariel still needs to get Eric to kiss her, or all of her dreams will end. She almost makes it with Kiss the Girl, which despite not being able to talk she made it pretty clear that she was willing and ready for Eric to kiss her. Ursula ruins that, but Ariel HAS endeared herself to Eric and he even prepares to go to her after giving up on the mystery mermaid. But of course, Ursula disguises herself as Vanessa via Ariel’s voice and hypnotizes Eric into marrying her. It’s sad because when Scuttle informs her of the proposal, Ariel is elated. She runs down the stairs, excited and gleeful… then she sees Eric and Vanessa, and you can see her heart break in two. It especially hits hard as she watches the ship take off, broken-hearted. She’s lost the man she loves, in moments she will be a mermaid again, and she will belong to Ursula fair and square. She pursued her dream, and it all seemed for naught.

But once Scuttle finds out about Ursula, Ariel quickly springs into action. With her friend's help, she reaches the ship just as Ursula’s necklace gets broken. This is a nitpick but I don’t like how Ariel ultimately wasn’t very active in helping rescuer Eric. Tbf IDK what she could have done, but I’d have liked to see her stand against Ursula before things go downhill. Otherwise it feels like this and the other events after… kind if feel handed to her by convenience and luck. But regardless she gets her voice back… but she fails to kiss Eric before the sun sets. That’s right folks, the so-called selfish, stupid deal that Ariel made? She failed to uphold it. She reverts to a Mermaid and now belongs to Ursula, and Triton can’t break it as it’s legally binding. So even if you DO think that Ariel made a bad choice, the film shows that yes, it WAS bad and she is now paying the consequences. Sure Triton sacrifices himself to take her place, but that still means that Ursula not only gets power, but her father is now a husk.

Ariel is enraged at this. Despite everything, I don’t think there’s any doubt that Ariel still loves her daddy. She was reluctant about never seeing him again before, and now seeing how her deal has lead to his fate upsets her. One big issue with Ariel is how… well, the film doesn’t make it clear that Ariel grew or learned anything. Sure there are consequences to her actions, but we don’t see her ponder over them. This is the closest we get to her showing regret as she tries to apologize to Triton and outright attacks Ursula for what she did to him. But she doesn’t express true regret for her actions. She doesn’t have a true reconciliation with her father so that the two can reach a resolution. I guess we can blame timing since we’re in the final ten or so minutes here, but it makes the end feel… convenient.

Eric saves Ariel from getting blasted by Ursula, and she manages to save him from Flotst and Jetsam. How? Bu yanking Ursula back and causing her to kill her own minions. Sure it’s not the Big Bad, but again Ariel marks a First in Disney Princess History by indirectly killing a villain. This provokes Ursula to go kaiju and essentially torment Ariel, who is unable to do anything at this point as she’s caught in a raging whirlpool. While one CAN say she’s a Damsel-in-Distress here (hence why I suggested Ariel should have gotten to do more in the wedding crash), she HAS saved Eric twice now. Plus by allowing Eric to kill Ursula, he essentially proves his worth by saving both the ocean AND the surface, and it contributes to Triton’s ultimate decision.

So yeah, Ursula dies, Triton corrects his wrongs by making Ariel human, and Ariel and Eric can live happily ever after. As I said, it /does/ kind of hurt Ariel’s character as she doesn’t really learn a lesson and it feels like she got incredibly lucky at the end. But at the same time Ariel is still a good character, and she marks a LOT of progression for the Disney Princess line. Sure she is a little selfish (though she usually means no harm), but she’s also someone who actively goes after her dreams. She doesn’t have to wait for it, nor does it center on love. Sure Eric is the catalyst, but that’s it. A catalyst. She’s allowed to rescue her prince. She’s allowed to fight against the villain. Sure she’s still emotional, falls in love, and needs her friends help. But she is also a very proactive, curious, and ambitious girl. Her dream was by far the most impossible of the Princesses thus far, but she still managed to achieve it.

Ariel is divisive, and I get why. The film DOES have some narrative problems (minor, but still) and I get why Ariel may rub some the wrong way. Me personally? I love her. She was a refreshing breath of air in the Princess line. She’s different from the Classic Three. She’s a bit more bratty and far less classy, but she also feels the most like a teenager and she follows her dreams in a very different manner. She’s still a good-hearted person, but she’s a flawed person. That’s what I love about her, she’s imperfect. Could more have been done to develop her? Maybe. But her flaws aren’t so bad that she’s a bad character or unlikeable. Her actions make sense and stay true to her character. I understand why she does what she does. I care for her because I see the sincerity in her. I relate to her longing for something that seems out of reach. And while it was nowhere near as conflicted, I know what it’s like to be in conflict with my father who loved me, but never truly understood who I was. But I loved him, he loved me, he ultimately would have let me lead the life I wanted, and in the end that’s what matters. It’s why Ariel and Triton at the wedding always makes me cry. Yeah, watching this two years after my dad passed… really hit hard.

The point is, I cared about Ariel. I related to Ariel. I did when I was a child, and I still do as an adult. Anyone who loves something or someone despite everyone around you not understanding or being against it I think can relate to Ariel and her position. Plus again, she set forward a new direction for the Disney Princesses. It’s a precedent that stands strong to this day. I’ve done my best to shed light onto Ariel, but it won’t convince everyone. If you hate her, fine. I can’t change your mind and tour free to make all the arguments you want. But I’m allowed to stand by my argument, and I am. Ariel is one of my favorites. She inspires kids to follow their curiosity and their ambitions. It teachers parents to accept their children and who/what they love, and to let them go forward in their lives. One can even argue that her film teaches kids to be careful when emotional to avoid the mistakes that she made, but still achieve a happy ending as well. Either way, I think that the hate against this little mermaid is far too harsh and it ALWAYS centers on the deal without taking anything else into account. It’s time we change that.

Final Thoughts

I love this film. The animation is lovely, the music fantastic, and despite a few issues here and there the story is sound. I don’t remember when I first saw it (it came out four years before I was born so not then), but I’ve loved it since that first time. I’m pretty sure I love the ocean and mermaids in general because of this film. Sure it diverts a good deal from the original Hans Christian Anderson story, but honestly? As someone who found that story unnecessarily cruel? I will take this version any day (no offense to those who like the original story, this is just me talking). It is a masterpiece that changed the game for Disney, for animation, and for the Disney Princesses. Ariel was very much a huge inspiration for many of her successors, and I am grateful for all that this little mermaid did.

Upon its release, Disney was FINALLY able to step into the light after spending over 20 years stuck in the dark. The film was a monumental success. The biggest success that Feature Animation had had since Walt’s days. They also finally beat Don Bluth, winning in the box office over All Dogs Go to Heaven, and returned to the top of the animation world. The Disney Renaissance had officially begun, and it wasn’t even close to slowing down. Just two years later, another Disney Princess film would be released. One that would achieve greatness, but also face great tragedy. So come and be our guest as when we return, we discuss a tale as old as time with 1991’s Beauty and the Beast.

Image Sources: Disney Wiki, Animation Screencaps Other Sources: The Making of The Little Mermaid: Treasures Untold

#disney princess #disney princess reviews #callie reviews #the little mermaid

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selfhelpskillss · 3 years

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Make Him Worship You Review: Should You Read It Through?

While many people turn to others for relationship advice, Self Help Skills would like to read books or watch programs about love and life, then get some lessons for myself. And recently, I have just digested an exciting online program named Make Him Worship You by Michael Fiore. It is beneficial, so I can end up reading this Make Him Worship You review.

Keep reading if you also want your lover to love and respect you more.

About Make Him Worship You Program

Make Him Worship You Michael Fiore

Written by a man – to be exact, an expert in the field of relationship and sexual psychology, the Make Him Worship You program with six modules will tell you, from a male perspective, how to seduce a man and make him crazy for you.

Believe me; the program will entirely change the way you take steps forward in your relationship because you now get a chance to see exactly what might happen in his little mind. Then, he will never see any women more attractive than you.

Some Interesting Information about Michael Fiore

Here is Michael Fiore

Micheal Fiore, as I mentioned above, is an expert in great modern relationships. He describes himself as blunt and funny – and most noticeably honest in giving you advice.

He is the author of various popular books and programs such as “6 Simple Tricks To CRACK THE MAN CODE And Get Any Guy To Open His Heart,” “Make Him Beg To Be Your Boyfriend,” or what we will discuss further here.

Some might even have seen him on “The Rachael Ray” show where he introduced his famous “Text The Romance Back Program” and gave many useful couples techniques.

For now, he is living in Seattle and working hard on the useful program “Make Him Worship You” and his publishing platform “Digital Romance.”

You can have a look then.

The Kind of Make Him Worship You

What is included in the program?

Rather than being a book, I must confirm that “Make Him Worship You” is a program, to be exact – a guide, with six modules in the forms of worksheets, materials, and also videos.

Even more, there are some additional bonuses in the packages that are also very helpful to check out, including:

When To Sleep with a Man: Exactly for those who wonder what the right time to sleep with the man after the first date is?

Unstoppable Confidence: One of the essential qualities of any dating is confidence, which creates the first impression. Then, in this bonus material, you can hear Michael and the fellow expert Griswald’s candid discussion.

The Good Girl’s Guide to Texting Dirty: The author published one of the best-sellers on Amazon, Text The Romance Back Program. Thus, you can definitely learn some useful texting techniques to blow the mind of any guys.

Sometimes, you will also have an extra Man-Melting Backrub or Make Him Beg to be Your Boyfriend. It is based on the promotion offered by the author.

Anyway, you will never get bored with the program. Sometimes, you can lie on the bed and check online tutorials when you wait for your partner, or you can even put on the earphones and hear Michael Fiore share about his experience and useful relationship techniques.

The Content of The Program

Now, get insight into the main content of the Make Him Worship You program. It is divided into six modules; each focuses on different aspects of your male lover’s romantic psychology. Hence, it is supposed to help you understand him better.

No need to check all the modules in a linear. Rather than that, you can start with any of the following topics you might be interested in.

Introduction and the lies you’ve been told about men

The book starts with correcting the misconceptions and misunderstanding of you about men. Instead, Michael Fiore reveals the opinions about romantic relationships and sexual attractions from the view of men.

In the end, it is more important to accept yourself and some negative expectations so that you can become more self-confident in a relationship.

What men mean by I Love You

To make him worship you, you should never be misled by him. Then, you must know whether your partner really means it when he says, “I love you.” In this part, you can understand how a man delivers a deep feeling.

For example, the man often finds himself hard and confused about his real emotion, so communication is usually tough at the beginning.

The secret emotional life of men

Again, I have to confirm that men have a hard time honestly expressing their feelings as someone said this “Men are an ocean of feeling, but we hardly see no drop out of them.”

Thus, it would be great to see the relationships in the men’s pressures, from his life, work, and even your relationship. Take a masculine man, for instance. Showing any vulnerability and softness is against impressions and characteristics that others often put on him. All of those negative experiences can make them afraid of opening.

Accepting Yourself

The next module is about you.

This is tightly knit with the confidence that I mentioned earlier. Then, you must realize and accept both the good and bad sides of yours regarding life, in general, and romantic relationships, in particular.

After that, it is recommended to have forgiveness on your soul so that you will feel the life much less stressful, and you can also quickly move on to new relationships.

More importantly, you decide whether he is worth it or turns out to be an jerk. Real-life examples are available for your reference. Have your red flags and be ready to kick him out of your life forever if he is not well-worth your time, let alone your love.

Feeding his masculinity

While most women desire to be loved and treasured, most men are ready to give them so. They like to be a provider and also a protector when you need it. Hence, always tap into such desires and make your man more confident about himself.

Excitingly enough, Michael Fiore emphasizes the high-testosterone and some proven techniques that can also help to win over your man. Say, it would help if you increased the intimate touching and hypnotic kissing to build the partner up and drive him to do as you desire.

Communication and getting what you want

Never skip the last module, which includes a series of advisable and actionable communicating strategies to persuade him to follow your desire, even in the most difficult or misunderstanding situations.

We all know that miscommunications or toxic questions can end up a broken couple.

How Much Is The Program?

It is around $37 the latest time I check the official website of the digital “Make Him Worship You.” It is not expensive at all, considering how much time and effort the author put into all resources of the program. Truth be told, the price is just as much as the cost of a chocolate bar, and you can get a secret sauce to your relationship.

In case that you just are not satisfied with the techniques suggested by Michael Fiore, you can request a money-back within 60 days.

No worries.

What I Like and Less Like about “Make Him Worship You”

Positive as the Make Him Worship You program review is, I still have some comments to make the guide more realistic and actionable.

Pros:

Written by a man, especially – an expert in relationships

Easy to follow content with specific examples

Diversified on the presentation methods to avoid boredness

Very affordable to get useful advice from experts

Money-back guarantee, so no worries if it does not work

Five bonuses included in the package to understand him better

Cons:

Cheesy and overly-sober language

Possible inward reflection (it’s hard to admit our mistakes!)

Only the digital version available

Michael Fiore Make Him Worship You Reviews

Want to hear feedback on He Will Worship You reviews from other consumers?

Then, I would like to summary some here.

From Jude Paler

She highly praises the program for its step-by-step guide that is immediately applied to almost any case. Far from being theoretical or philosophical, the advice of Michael Fiore is practical!

From Lakeport Chamber

“Make Him Worship You” program, in the Lakeport Chamber’s opinion, is an online relationship. It is helpful as the title. All techniques are easy to implement, as well.

Last Verdict – My Overall Opinion

The Make Him Worship You review above is shown. Those who claim to Make Him Worship You scam obviously have never read it through yet. In fact, the program has a beneficial content that is broken down in easy-to-follow modules. However, the reader should not be stressed too much about self-reflection and get depressed. Instead, take good care of yourself, win over the male partner, and make him worship you to the end.

Credit by: https://selfhelpskills.net/make-him-worship-you-review/

#selfhelpskills selfhelpmarriage selfhelpbook selfhelpbooks selfhelpdating

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howtosurvivebeingsingle · 3 years

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I Do, Do I?

If you follow my regular blog that I rarely post on, you'll know that my heterosexual roomie proposed to me. The thing is, we're both hetero females that decided that instead of getting married by 50 at the rate we're going, we may as well. The amount of benefits married couples get while they're still in college is ridiculous. We have friends that live a town away that are both married since they graduated high school and the amount of money they were able to save landed them a cozy four-bedroom house. Sounds too good to be true, and believe me I wish it were. I am still attending my local university myself trying to double major, as is my roommate. We both have multiple jobs to support our apartment but with expenses, we're borderline broke. There's enough to get by, that being said when classes start is where the trouble begins. Marriage is looking pretty tempting right now. Is it really all it's cracked out to be? Here are the details I've heard so far; You get generous financial aid meaning starving is less likely, Married life is less expensive which is less cost of living in an apartment or house, Mutual motivation from your spouse (depends but mine's fine), and it prepares you for what marriage is actually like.

In Short, my maybe wife and I will pay less for college, less for housing, have that emotional support most people lack, and get a taste of what being married to a man is like (sort of). The bargain is that if we actually go through with this, we'll still date men as we please and if we're in an actual relationship and the guy proposes we get a divorce. Imagine your maid of honor is your ex-wife? There's more humor to it. He picks you up for a date and she's watching tv. Before you go, "Bye Honey!", or she gets the door for you and introduces herself as your actual married wife. The situation is so complex that I'm actually near writing a book about it. Here's where I advertise my Finding Mr. Darcy book trilogy that's in the works. If there's one thing I know about, it's being single. I'm the Carrie Bradshaw of singles instead of sex, that is if I can even claim that title. I asked my friend if he thought being married had all the perks and he said this; "It's a pipedream trying to trap singles into thinking life is better with someone else. True as that last statement maybe, the rest is not. The idea is that after marriage it's time to settle down. You move into a cottage in the plains, wide-open spaces where all the little kids can run around. Your husband comes back from work and the two of you snuggle in bed without a care, it's bullshit. Girls and I mean girls are too high maintenance now that you've got to give them everything they want or it's no deal. Hell, you're even lucky to find a woman who actually wants to care for you as much as herself. Total pipedream, and waste in this century."

That was the first time I had ever heard him speak so hopelessly about love. I expected an answer like "No, true love is out there somewhere." as he often said, but this was not the case at all. Either he was in a really bad mood that day, or I don't know my best friend like I thought I did. The next day, I decided to take a look at married couples in the workplace, by workplace, I mean my job in digital services. From what I was seeing was a lot of arguing. Either the man would be on the computer and the woman was nagging on him the whole time or the woman was on the computer and the man was making her feel like she was stupid. If both parties were separate, the wife would call every ten minutes to ask meaningless questions, or the wife was present with two or more hyper kids. It was hard for them to get anything done with or without their spouse present. I also decided to take a look at single parents and the closest one was my sister. In 2019, she got pregnant with my nephew by her boyfriend Will. She had him in march of 2020, so he's about a year old and beginning to get used to his legs. When she's home, she's stressed from being home from work, and on her off days, she's stressed with her son's rambunctious behavior. Our mother watches him when she's working her ten-hour shifts and leaves the rest to her when she gets back. Pretty soon it'll just be my sister and her kid when mom moves down south of the US. Both can verify that he's quite the handful and with my experience, he is. That doesn't mean I love him any less, but my share of babysitting isn't any easier.

The situation is mutual whether you're married or not with kids. Stress with a side of stress and exhaustion. Putting kids aside, I've seen couples without kids like my maybe wife's other best friend. Things seem all prim and proper when they come to visit, but according to her, they still manage to argue almost on a daily. My coworkers feel the same way about marriage life even when I had explained my situation. They continued to urge me to take things into careful consideration before jumping head into marriage. I kept getting negative answers from people despite my search to find some hope for the situation. Then the question crossed my mind; despite the fairytale images given to us in childhood, is it really worth the trouble of getting married?

Julie: "It always ends in tears. Someone leaves, someone dies, or you get a divorce."

Varsha: "So long as they compliment you. You need support from both parties for it to work."

Denny: "It depends. You don't need a man or woman to support you all the way, you can do fine just being single. My wife and I are great, but I'd be just as fine alone."

Enzo: "No. All odds are against you in the long run. The woman finds someone else to bug and takes half of everything."

Annie: "It's more of a want than a need. The best thing is not to be pressured into it if you're not 100% into it."

Vinny: "Only if you're ready and trust each other all the way."

Marcus: "The question you should be asking is if friendship is worth it. That's what it really comes down to."

Lori: "It can be fulfilling despite the fear of failure."

The answers kept leading me in circles and in the end, I wound up back where I started. It was a total toss-up of whether you got heads or tails, but I wasn't about to give in that easily. I decided to take my venture to a baseball game on Friday and what I saw there nearly startled me. A couple of 65 years renewed their vows at the stadium. I started to think that maybe all it did take was a bit of compromise and despite half the negativity from my interview and friends there really is someone for everyone. Perhaps the divorced people just haven't found the right person just yet. Like my grandmother on my mother's side, she married four men before she met my grandfather and they've been together almost fifty years. I guess you could say it was a task of trial and error, but it worked out in the long run. Neither of them has ever had a reason to want to divorce. Before I leave questions unanswered, yes my grandfather too also had his share of divorces. The numbers don't seem to matter, only the fact that there really could be someone out there for everyone. A glimmer of hope to end this rather late and brief update. I wonder if there really is hope, is there still time for we singles of every shade and orientation. Is there truly that soulmate we all long for somewhere besides where we are? Until next time and Much Love Your Way Darlings!

#sex and the city #singles #carrie bradshaw #tumblr #romance #couple #lovers #relationship #blog post #july 2021

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vanityloves · 3 years

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oak and stars for slick! :0

ah yes... this was sent last year...apologies for the last reply...happy 2021 mfs ♡ and thank you sm for the ask!

Word count: 1.6k i guess wtf.

cw: idk? homestuck ajsjdj. kinda mushy towards the end but dw im Me ♡ there's a joke somewhere in here

oak - who’s the more emotional one? how do you balance each other out in this aspect?

Defining 'emotional' is a bit difficult since it's often seen as 'whos the crybaby' but techinally, both parties are emotionally driven. The sole factor is one usually works solo (when working with a group, usually takes a supporting role) and takes things personally. The other can put those feelings aside and work with a group even if they're holding a personal grudge against them.

I'd have to say Ivory is more emotional in the sense of "who cried over (insert characters) death". But of course I'm going to elaborate.

I've always had issues placing Ivory in one 'category' and describe them as "a bit all over the place". At first, they're very jumpy and put off by Slick's demeanor (fairly so). They aren't rude or cold though, rather they're defensive and almost always on guard when around others. Despite this, they're quick to come to someone's aid to act as a protector, since they easily sympathize with others that show fear, sadness or hurt, even if it's an act. (Rightfully) Protraying themselves as naive. They've always been the type to comfort and protect - having a very 'motherly' presence (Ivory is a whole ass mother so I don't blame them)

Ivory is known to display sporadic bursts of emotions that range from enthusiasm and joy or angst and rage before returning to their calmed state in minutes. They're an odd case of slow to anger but quick to put out. The Knight finds the entire thing tiring but don't try to stop said outburts. Things that upset them before, suddenly changes with the seasons.

The type to appear cool, calm and collected and tries incredibly hard to maintain that when faced w/ dangerous situations. Inside though, they're probably ready to cry and once the ordeal is over, they probably do just that.

Ivory tries their best to think logically before jumping into any situation but find that things like 'promises' and plans hold them captive. They're easily swayed when things like this are brought up bc credibility and trust are incredibly important to them. Unfortunately, they're the type to beat themselves up over loses like that, even if it was for the greater good/nothing else could be done. They run off of the more positive emotions like hopefulness and joy (the 'happy feeling' after helping others). This isn't to say they're not petty or bitter, its very much the opposite - its too emotionally taxing to focus on themselves though.

♤

I think Slick is emotional in the sense of he'll experience certain things and if it's something he's not used to, his first reaction is to respond with anger or aggression. He has a pretty bad temper and described to have a nasty attitude and very black and white with his thoughts and decision making. He's the embodiment of 'I won't hesitate, bitch.', if he says something, he will follow through. He's the type to keep promises and wants the upheld on both ends, if the other party does not follow through, he's not the type to feel hurt, rather resorting to anger and cutting off ties - physically and emotionally, he's never been attached.

The man is a mobster so he's used to seeing blood and gore. He's definitely hardened over the years of that rough and tumble lifestyle, so it really isn't personal for him. He's never had it easy and doesn't rely on others (besides the crew) but he's willing to work with others if push comes to shove.

He's not very emotional in the crying and sniffling way. He keeps to himself most of the time and doesn't feel the need to help or seek out others. However, that's countered when he finds himself helping others that are defenseless but become enraged that someone would pick on someone that was 'obviously weaker'. He has a definite soft spot for the gentle, kinder things he runs across but I wouldn't say he gets super emotional about it. Slick runs off of negative emotions such as anger, pettiness, (such as Ivory does with guilt).

♤

They balance each other out with their different outlook/approach on each situation. Some things need to be done immediately and spontaneously, just as some things need to be done with patience or methodically. This isn't to call Slick a dumbass or whatever - the man works best without overthinking the situation and making calls on the spot. Ivory has their fair share of improvised plans but tend to work better with a loose plan (even if it's "don't die"). Their anxiety and lack of confidence ultimately puts them at greater risk.

One thing that's great ab Slick is, he's very sure about himself, his actions, and his feelings so it's reassuring for Ivory. Ivory lends Slick a lot of patience, understanding, but with a firm hand. They don't expect him to take their advice all the time but they expect him to hear them out. There are plenty of close calls that stress Ivory out to no end but on the flipside, Slick doesn't expect Ivory to be so rash and promptly follows them when they do rush into things - he's protective by nature and there's a bit of a curiosity involved.

♤

Overall, their relationship tends to tilt towards the negative aspects of being emotionally driven - pettiness, guilt, spite, etc. But they reassure/calm the other when things get more serious. Slick is incredibly protective and will put himself in danger for them. It's not a matter of not trusting Ivory, rather, it is a sign of loyalty and commitment hebhas towards them.

Ivory is confident in Slick and knows he can fair well on his own or with a team - they still worry but they often rely on hope and luck that things will eventually work in their favor (that's not to say they won't work for their future/goals).

♤

stars - what kind of a date would your f/o take you on?

Ivory was never one for big, flashy dates even in their previous relationships (much to their dismay, they went on many). Dressing up every so often is fun but loses its novelty if it's constant. Slick doesn't seem too flashy either, preferring to lay low and enjoy the time he has alone - sure he broods but he's having his noir film moment. He doesn't mind spending money, he's got plenty to spare which he usually uses on booze and cigarettes anyways. There's no harm in spoiling Ivory on occasion and probably enjoys taking them someplace nice. He hates dressing up in stuffy, 3 piece suits and avoids them at all costs, but if Ivory's dressed to the nines, he's not gonna be shown up.

I've said it as a joke but truthfully, the couple could start off at a 5 star and end up at the diner down the street. Sharing fries all done up in heels and makeup, cufflinks and polished shoes.

That being said, they're both more casual! The duo is more than content driving around the city listening to the radio and enjoying the others company, regardless of the silence.*** Truthfully, dinner and a nice drive or walk around the city is ideal. Ivory's more of a window shopping type and enjoys peeking into windows to watch people bustle around. Slick tends to walk a few steps behind to keep them in view, admire from afar type. He's not a very chatty individual and tends to rely on looks and physical touch when talking to Ivory. He's got a permanent scowl on his face but he's truly content when he's with them.

♤

Slick enjoys his privacy but he's not against going out for drinks and enjoying a nice performance here and there. But if it's shit, he won't be sticking around (if he goes alone), with Ivory he can distract himself and leads them somewhere quiet and he snidely comments on the performances while Ivory tries to find the good and bad in it.

Since that's more of a hit or miss type of date, he tends to do things that are sure to be more relaxing. He's a hotblooded guy, while Ivory's more mellow so he figures getting them riled up isn't something that's 'fun' for them; makes him settle his ass down before he breaks a hip He'll pop in a few of his cherished noir films and let them get as close as they like - he's not as picky ab touch when they're alone.

If not that, he has Ivory randomly choose a record to play and sits back with them. If he was generous and feeling sweet, he'll help them to their feet and hold them near and sway together. He's an awkward romantic but a romantic nonetheless, so he's willing to push through it for the sake of having them against him and teasing them if they look a bit flushed (but reading the atmosphere).

***Extra thing:

Slick really said 'I know a place' and drives out of the city that scares shit out of Ivory- purely because this is unknown territory. Of course they trust him but their nerves often get the best of them as they sit up, a bit stiffly as they look at the scenery passing by.

Very smooth conversation:

"this is where I get rid of 'things'"

"really?"

"yeah"

"oh...at least the view is nice. guess that's why you drove this far."

*met w/ silence*

What 'things', you may ask? Take a wild guess! Maybe it's emotional baggage, sometimes is Physical Baggage!

#self ship #self insert #homestuck #spades slick #slow down why we going so fast!!!#s: knives and ivory #my headcanons #my writing #why must i keep talking jfc #been sitting in my docs for weeks. finally finished them today. bye.#ask reply #anon #n e ways.#♡♡♡ slick ♡♡♡#but also slick....🔫😔

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404-potato · 4 years

Text

I’m going to share something because I really need to get this off my chest. Please feel free to ignore this -

... I never really talked about it with anyone because I don’t think I really had it in me to fully acknowledge it even. “Embarrassed” is the best way to describe why quite honestly... as much as I hate to admit it

This... is how I ended up hating a series I loved. And the ship/fandom still makes me cringe because of a weirdly “traumatizing” (? maybe? not sure - i hate using that word/throwing it around;;;) incidents that wasn’t really even about the fandom directly at all?

tw: relationship mess?

So before IronStrange, how I used to deal with liking series was through cosplaying. There was a good base for it where I lived and good chunk of my friends cosplay too or at least familiar with the community.

I got into this particular series (that I won’t name here) because a friend (who I eventually got involved in a relationship with) was REALLY into it. It was great at first. I loved the series, it was fun, we cosplayed a pair she shipped hard at the time and at some point I liked it too (I think she’s still a bit obsessed with that pairing actually).

Basically... she got obsessive.

It started with the little things like... very...uh... predictable... she didn’t want me to cosplay with other people. She didn’t want me to cosplay with anyone else for this particular pairing. Wanted me to prioritize her during cons... sort of made it impossible for me to be flexible to make plans with any other people. When confronted eventually (the “hey so you know I only have so much time I can give to this hobby- if I make all these plans with you I don’t have time for other friends. We can still do things together but I want to spend time with other people too”)... she made it seem like she would give me space but when time came it was always “I’m not saying you can’t go hang out with your friends but you promised this.” “I asked you first.” ... which by promise btw was her mentioning it some months ago by passing. There were other little things here and there in the con/cos world like if any other friend wanted to put together a cosplay group and asked me she got upset I didn’t ask her to join? Her reasoning was that “well I always ask you so why don’t you.” which seemed like demanding I feel the same way about her as she did for me. ... I know... sounds terrible of me & maybe I should be more sympathetic but... you can’t... demand someone to return how you feel about them or get upset when they don’t? (by the way this was way before we dated even - she also repeated denied she had any sort of feelings for me)

And I honestly didn’t recognize it at first or thought it wasn’t a big deal. I had lot of incident in the past where friends, people I dated, etc. made some... perhaps unjustified demands and I did my best to accommodate if I was willing or situation allowed it. I truly, maybe arrogantly, believed I could fully take care of myself because i always had been that one person who could take care of themselves. ... and there was no possible way anyone could ever “take advantage of me” so to say? in any way.

Then eventually we started dating. It was casual, lets see where it goes at first. ...then at some point we were in a relationship? ... quite frankly I don’t even remember how fully that came about. (I was not exactly in the best mental state that year due multiple disasters that was going on in my personal life - terrible timing because i let a lot of “red flags” go since I was so tired to fight).

She wanted me to stop talking to certain friends. One was a friend who we went on couple dates (and it didn’t work out, & by then this friend was dating someone else). But she still didn’t want me be friends with this person.

...And for those who think you shouldn’t be friends with your exes or not talk to them at all for some reason? F u. Yes it is fully possible to be friends with your ex if you both are at a good place etc. Esp if these people were not even exes per se it was like people you went on a date or two with that you both realized after “hey yea we’re friends not anything more”.

Little by little I was talking to less and less people, interacted with less and less friends. I stopped cosplaying completely just so I didn’t have to deal with her getting upset at me. I didn’t have the energy. It felt like if I go anywhere I had to invite her. If I made any plans I should invite her. After a while I was so miserable to the point we had huge fights. I literally left the apartment to get away because she wasn’t listening to anything I was saying and all her rebuttal to everything was along the lines of “It’s because i like you so much” etc.

Yea this whole “being loved” thing to the point they want to spend so much time with you at all times may sound sweet in theory ...but for someone who is an only child (with no distant relatives in the same country), who is used to be left alone to live my life with very minimal supervision since 5 years old, needs a lot of time to myself naturally... it’s a nightmare. But if I said I wanted to be alone or need time to myself suggest I’ll go to my parent’s (not my first choice but ya know... at this point i figured she’ll flip if I said any friend’s)... she’ll try to angrily (very recklessly) drive off saying she’ll sleep at her work parking lot?? or I came back after one of these fights and she had all these scratches because apparently she tried to take a bath with wine and she fell?? ... I feel like I couldn’t even leave. ...typing this now, it’s kinda occurring to me I felt very stuck. She says I can go, I can do things, but... i mean... I can’t?? because then she’ll go off and do something like this. That time she was physically hurt, I know I should feel bad but I honestly couldn’t feel bad. I felt suffocated. I was angry. I felt like she was doing this as some sort of attention seeking... thing.

Oh and lets not forget comments here and there about how I should let her know what i’m doing all the time, all the change of plans. Example: barely one month after I started at a new job, it was the holiday party. I did let her know I’ll be trying to come home early but please eat without me/don’t wait up. Well as I was trying to leave, I got caught in conversation by my VP and then my CEO... i couldn’t just up and leave at that point?? And I couldn’t answer the 30+ calls I got from her. ...She was pissed. Saying how they waited for me to eat, how I said I’ll be home early, etc. I tried to explain what happened. It’s a holiday party, its loud. I can’t keep looking at my phone when i’m talking to my CEO. I did say i’ll try but shit happens and I can’t update her all the time 24/7...She said she got it but next day would still throw these passive aggressive remarks. Couple of her friends came to visit from out of town, we were supposed to spend the day together with them. I was obviously tired because of the holiday party still and I muttered like “damn i’m tired” by passing... her automatic reaction was “well you shouldn’t have stayed out then.” because in her words, during the argument that followed, we made plans to spend time with her friends so I should have prioritized it at all cost even over the job that I need. Nothing said I couldn’t just leave and come home early, I didn’t have to go in the first place. ...oh idk there is something called work politics??? esp when you are a minority girl working at 80~90%+ white male company.

Then it all boiled up to a particular bad fight where I said I need her to compromise because I’m ready to lose it... I explained so many things from above that was genuinely becoming so unhealthy for me... How she said she’ll be better in the past but she continued on, etc.

...lol... and the first thing she says to that is how she still doesn’t want me to cosplay with other people. I literally had a moment of that’s what’s so important to you??? SERIOUSLY? fuck this i’m not cosplaying ever again. period. Because at that point... because of the whole incident... or many incidents, I had such negative feeling towards the hobby I didn’t want to do it anyways... let alone this pairing she really liked... or the series etc. god there was... so many more... like the time we went to a bar to have fun, she over drank even when I told her multiple times hey maybe you should slow down... She basically did the whole “drinking excess as an excuse to say what she wants after” “i’m drunk so I’m saying this” thing. So in a very public place, the bar was crowded, there were people all around us, she yelled VERY loudly about how I didn’t seem to want to have sex with her anymore. When I asked her to keep quiet, please can we talk about this elsewhere... she KEPT GOING- LOUDLY YELLING. Hysterically crying. Honestly... considering everything going on... yea I didn’t want to. At some point it did occur to me I didn’t want to have sex at all (and that was whole another level of problem considering I’ve always been very sexual person...) I mean I would have been totally willing to have a serious conversation about this but NOT AT A PUBLIC PLACE WITH STRANGERS ALL AROUND??? I was mortified. (this is also why I stopped going to nice bars... i used to enjoy them. After my early 20s, I didn’t drink to get drunk but I loved visiting creative bars and having a nice drink or two... well... not anymore lol) Again, these are not even 50% of all that happened with this person. .... honestly this relationship caused me so much issues personally I haven’t even begin to solve. It’s actually to the point I’m considering therapy.

But yea... sure it may not be the biggest of things but sometimes I’m very resentful I can’t enjoy the series I used to enjoy because I just automatically have VERY negative emotions about it. Same thing with cosplay, a hobby I used to be very happily involved in to relieve stress. I now have this almost... fight or flight feeling when they are mentioned, i freeze... it sometimes feels like something is pressing down on your lungs making it impossible to breath.

...And this is also why... I started tumblr and ended up seeking company of online people who doesn’t really know me because... yea now I’m avoiding my friends at this point or mutuals with this person since... well, everyone thinks she’s a very nice person, very good for me... because on surface level, yea she does really seem like she likes me, gets me all these nice gifts etc. They still comment from time to time about how I should be doing better. Treat her better. Because if someone screws up in a relationship, given my history and personality, its probably my doing. ...Okay. any normal situation, yea I would say that’s probably true but this? this was not... yea.

#I know i'm not completely blamelss #after I was so fed up I was fairly harsh when telling her off etc #I don't believe in some perfect relationship but there is a difference between having a few problems here and there and... yea

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