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earlgreydream · 3 years

Text

mahogany.

| draco x reader | smut |

anon requested. Professor draco ❤️ y/n were in his room just chilling draco reading and y/n getting bored and h-word 🙄 she started to seduce him but he wont give in saying not now blablabla when y/n literally throwing herself to him and he rejects her lol and when y/n touching herself moaning beside him being a brat thats where draco takes control and fucking her like theres no tomorrow

cw: overstim, ‘professor’, masturbation

a/n: I combined these concepts and changed a bit but I hope you love ❤️

“Draco, can’t you take a break? I’ve been waiting all day,” you asked sweetly, wrapping your arms around his neck as you stood behind him.

“I’ve got to grade these papers, darling.” Draco spoke, kissing your hand before his focus drifted back to the papers. Yours had already been graded, a nearly perfect score with only tiny corrections in the margins.

You’d been secretly dating your potions professor for almost a year. Draco Lucius Malfoy was the youngest, hottest, and smartest professor at Hogwarts, and you’d become instantly enamored with him. All the girls whispered about the young slytherin prince who had returned to teach the class he excelled at.

Your love was scandalous and fiery, and full of love and adoration. Draco was a bit older, and the role of a caring dominant suited him well, guiding you and teaching you. You adored him, and wanted to do everything to make him happy. Typically, you were a well behaved girlfriend, but today he wasn’t so lucky.

You were needy, horny, and you desperately wanted to be fucked. Draco had been overly busy with grading exams and papers, leaving you with less attention.

You sat on his desk beside where he worked, absentmindedly undoing the buttons on your uniform top. Draco ignored you, his eyes trailing along lines of script about potion ingredients. His glasses rested delicately on the bridge of his slender nose, the sleeves of his sweater pushed up to his elbows as the room warmed.

You reached out and dragged your fingers through his silky white hair, freeing it from the messy bun it had been tied back in.

“Not now, I’ve got to grade,” Draco hummed, squeezing your thigh.

You tossed your shirt on the floor, knowing once he was giving you any ounce of attention, you’d get scolded for. When he didn’t look up, you dropped your bra with it, desperate to get his attention.

“Professor Malfoy?” You whined, gently grasping his jaw and tilting his head up to look at you.

Draco immediately dropped his pen, utterly astounded by the sight of you. You were perched on the desk, wearing just your short little uniform skirt that had ridden up around your waist, and thigh high socks. Your tits were out, on full display for him. Your distraction was working, but your bratty attitude compelled him to deny you a bit longer.

“I just want you to touch me, please,” your sweet voice was lilted with need, and Draco shifted in his chair as his trousers grew tight.

“I know you do, pretty girl, but I’m not finished working.”

“But Professor Malfoy, m’not wearing any panties,” you said softly, flipping up your skirt and showing him your bare skin that was glistening with desire.

He stared at you for a moment, letting his eyes travel along your body and land on your puffy little pussy, that was throbbing from how badly you wanted him. He glanced back up at your eyes before turning back to the papers, wishing more than ever he didn’t have to work.

You were horrified that Draco left you untouched, picking his pen back up and resuming his work. He had to bite back the smirk, amused by your annoyed gasp.

You gave up on him then, deciding to take care of yourself. You stayed beside him, parting your legs and leaving your skirt flipped up. You set one socked foot on his thigh for leverage and slowly started to dip your fingers into your folds. Your touch moved delicately over your skin, drawing tight circles on your clit until you were dripping onto Draco’s desk.

Soft whines were strained in your throat, and Draco swallowed his own moan. He forced himself not to watch you, but the sound of your fingers gliding in and out of your pussy tore all of his attention from his work.

A smirk tugged at your lips as you watched him drop his pen and slide the stack of papers into a drawer, clearing his desktop.

You breathed a sigh of relief when he tugged his sweater off. Your own fingers didn’t come close to reaching the tender places that his could, and you were desperate for him.

Draco sat back in his chair, palming himself through tight black boxers as he watched you finger yourself, your thighs jolting when you brushed your spongey walls.

“Draco, please help me,” you begged, sliding your fingers out when he stared at you.

“I will be glad to help you after you make yourself come.”

“No, I want you.”

“Don’t be bad now, darling. Let me watch you play with that pretty little pussy.”

Draco feigned a sympathetic smile at your whimpers, pulling your legs open farther to inspect your movements. You felt surveyed, like Draco was inspecting your performance.

You pouted at Draco, and he tiled his head to the side. You tried reaching for his hand, and he pushed his chair back a bit more. He was amused by your needy drama, but he was nearing to the end of his patience.

“If you don’t make yourself come in the next five minutes, you don’t get to come at all for the next week, darling.”

You flashed a hurt look, but his gaze was stern, eyes dark with lust. When you hesitated to move, Draco glanced down at his watch, silently daring you to test him.

Your fingers moved down to your clit, trying to get off for your boyfriend. You tensed as the pressure built, and you fell back on your elbows. Draco watched your tits bounce as you drew ragged breaths in your chest, overwhelmed from the pleasure reverberating through you.

“That’s my girl,” Draco praised you, moving in and lightly kissing your swollen clit. You jumped at the contact, startled by the stimulation.

“Darling, you’ve made such a mess on my desk,” he scolded with a smile, watching you pull your bottom lip between your teeth.

He gently pushed you to lay back against the wooden desktop, hard and cold under your mostly nude body. You grinned as he undressed, parting your legs and putting your feet on the desk.

Draco dragged your hips to the edge, immediately pushing into your slick pussy. Your overstimulated cry encouraged Draco, who held your hips down as he railed you.

Draco went as rough and fast as he could, fucking you into delirious ecstasy. Your professor satiated your every desire, fucking you braindead on his desk.

“Going to let me come inside this tight little cunt, darling?” Draco asked, his hand pinning your wrists above your head.

“Yes, professor,” you murmured, playing into the taboo of your relationship.

Your walls fluttered around Draco, closing down on him tightly as he forced you to orgasm for the second time, his touch pure electricity on your clit.

He mouthed wet kisses along your breasts, feeling your breath shudder and your back arch off of the mahogany.

“Fuck, pretty girl,” Draco hissed into your soft skin, throbbing inside of you.

Draco’s loud moan echoed in your ears and the sharpness of his teeth against your skin made you shudder. Hot white ribbons were painting your walls, thick and warm. He pulled you up against his chest, holding you close as he filled you with his spend.

“Draco, oh my god,” you gasped, dragging your fingers through his fine hair.

“I want you to feel me dripping out of you for hours,” he growled into your shoulder, leaving another mark on the skin there.

You were feeble in his arms, overstimulated and worn out. His lips pressed kisses to your face, and he got the two of you into a generous hot bath.

Loving hands washed the day from your body, attentive to everywhere you were sensitive. Draco whispered to you and kissed your lips, being extra gentle.

“I won’t be so busy this weekend. We can have a night in, no papers to grade, all my attention on you,” Draco suggested.

“Yes please.”

“Maybe I can make you work for an A then,” he teased, brushing his nose against yours and making you giggle.

#earl grey draco #draco #draco fluff #Draco smut #Draco malfoy #Draco malfoy smut #Draco malfoy fluff #draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy x reader smut #Draco x reader smut #Draco x reader #Draco x reader fluff #Draco imagine #draco oneshot #Draco one shot #dom!draco #professor!draco #professor draco

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oh-for-fic-sake · 3 years

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What will daddy Henry do if his little is sad because someone took something valuable from her?

So i wanst sure what to base this on entirely, so I'm going to go with something I went through over the last few weeks. I had a little bit of anon hate, which I deleted but the words stuck with me making me second guess everything i was working on and the confidence i had in my writing was taken away. so this is like a shameful self indulgent fantasy that im going to read to myself when ever im down.

Warnings: Pretty Personal For Me, Angsty, Fluffy, Self Doubt, Happy Ending, DDLG, Long!!

Tagging: @viking-raider @isitmine @tinabean37 @loserrlauraa @msblkfire84 @henrythickcavill @plainbrunettelbl @dummiesshort @cynic-spirit @pandaxnienke @two-unbeatable-beaters @libbymouse @wolfieash @eldarwen333 @princesssterek @mom2000aggie @blackestpinkworld

(not sure who to tag in headcannons? these are the ones on my everything taglist)

Henry watched quietly with a frown as you sat down in the living room, eyes cast down at the tablet in front of you shoulders slumped.

"poppet what's wrong love?"

"n-nothing da-addy" you said with a small stutter

Henry shifted on his feet looking at you critically before coming over to you.

"nothing? So your sitting here almost in tears over nothing" he stated sceptically rounding the sofa sitting next to you.

"I'm not cryin" you sniffled trying to bite your lower lip to stop it from wobbling.

"not yet, but close enough poppet, hand it over" he said holding out his hand waiting for the tablet.

You whined not wanting to hand it to him at first but after a mini battle of wills you placed the colourful tablet in his hand.

Your head was cast down and you rubbed your eyes trying to catch the tears before they were noticeable.

"okay then, so this is your new story?" he asked scrolling through the page not reading it all but scanning the words, it was well written like always.

At the beginning of the pandemic he suggested you started a blog, and you had. A writing blog all full of fanfictions of... Him.

He didn't mind he actually love you doing something constructive, it kept you happy and busy which helped him because there wasn't many free days even in lockdown. He was working out, reading scripts or rearranging covid tests and travel.

Plus knew these smut blogs existed, even lurked on a few.

"y-yeah" you mumbled leaning on him hugging his arm scanning the page as he scrolled, you knew he wasn't reading everything maybe every few lines

"sooo what's the problem?" he said not finding an issue with the writing.

"i... I cant post it" you muttered looking down avoiding his gaze

"why?" he asked frowning not liking the defeated tone you had.

"j-just because..."

"ah I see, you have lost your confidence" he said quickly figuring out the problem, the downside to writing was everything was personal preference so tiny comments could knock your confidence.

In a way it was like his work, you put your heart and soul into it and then people don't like it? It was always a bummer. But he was used to it, you were not.

You nodded to him it was true you'd lost your confidence, you hadn't wrote for a while.

You couldn't seem to find the words to fit together anymore.

You felt silly, they were just a few mean comments, words from a nasty troll who didn't have anything better to do but it hurt, you poured your heart into every chapter and then for people to rip it to shreds? It stung.

"y-yes I... They didn't like it" you hummed fiddling with your fingers, drawing deep breaths trying not to cry

"and so what?" he said shrugging making you snap your gaze to him.

"wha?"

"it doesn't matter love, so a few people didn't like it, lots of people do, I love your stories"

"you have to your my daddy"

Henry huffed and shook his head at you ruffling your hair pressing a kiss to your head amused that you thought that's the only reason he liked your writing.

"don't stop writing just because of a few mean people nugget, it takes a lot of skill to write and a lot of bravery to share it. Your a brave talented little baby and I'm very proud of you"

He said cooing as that seemed to be the final push sending you over the edge making you burst out into tears.

He hugged you moving the tablet out of the way before pulling you to his lap, unbuttoning his shirt half way and squished you into his bare chest knowing you needed to feel him, not a shirt.

"shh its okay babygirl, your stories are wonderful, and you have fun writing them don't you baby?"

You nodded crying harder trying to get the words out but you just couldn't instead whining incoherently into him.

"and you enjoy making the little banners? And collect all your photos and gifs?"

"y-yeah but they di-dn't like it last time!"

"they don't have to like everything you do sweety"

"but I don't wana upset them!"

"did you do the warnings?" he asked knowing all about the do's and don'ts of posting your erotica.

You nodded whining you always did warnings on stuff to be safe.

"and make the little cut thingy you were telling me about?" again you nodded at him

"so your telling me they read the warnings, clicked to see it and then were mean?" you sniffled biting your lip trying to calm down but nodded to him humming quietly.

"well then it sounds to me like they were going out of their way, looking for someone to pick on" he said slowly rocking you slightly.

You fell quiet resting your head on his chest as he rubbed your back and patted your bottom soothing you.

"but what if they wasn't? What if my stories are bad- and encourage bad stuff!" you cried tucking yourself into him tighter.

"no-no you repeat after me, fiction is fiction" he said pulling you back wiping your tears waiting for you to say it out loud.

"fic-tion is f-fiction" you repeated

"I did everything I could to warn people"

"I-I did everyth-ing I could to w-warn people" he smiled at you as you drew a huge breath calming yourself down.

"and they are jealous because I'm an adorable, smart, funny kind and caring babygirl who has the cutest little peach butt in the world~" he said smirking at you from above holding you tightly to him pressing a kiss to your head.

"and they- daddy! Noo! I can't say that~" you gasped flushing as you realised what he had said

"oh yes you can because its the truth now come here let daddy bite that peach~" he growled playfully snapping his jaws at you.

"ah-no!" you screeched giggleing as he began tickling you all over wrestling you playfully trying to lean over and bite your but through your shorts.

He landed two solid bite's on your bottom before pulling back. Even though he had cheered you up he could see you were still doubting yourself.

Henry cast a glance to the tablet and smirked forming a plan that might just get you back on track. He was not going to let anyone steal your sparkle.

"come on you you've spent enough time writing go play in the garden with Kal"

Once you left henry got to work swiping up the tablet and going on your one drive seeing the meticulously organized notebooks, recognising a few by name.

A few weeks later Henry came in to the living room with a medium size box and plopped it on the sofa next to you.

"here we go nugget!" he said placing the gift next to you, they couldn't have come quickly enough, he had noticed you hadn't been writing at all, which upset him because he knew how much you loved it.

"what's that daddy?" you asked peering over the box not expecting any gifts.

"why don't you open it and find out?" he said sitting the other side of the box handing you a pair of scissors to slice the tape.

You moved slowly cutting it open and pulled the box open then froze.

"d-daddy? What thats my..." you trailed off pulling out the hard back books your banner on the front cover.

"your stories? Yes poppet, I realised that you were putting so much work into these things but could loose them, they are soo good that daddy wanted to read them over and over and now we can!" he said pleased with himself as you sat there shocked looking at the small collection of a5 books.

"but their- i dont..." you said happy but completely shocked, flicking through the pages, there were even a few comments in the margins from henry pointing out the pits he liked making your heart swell with pride.

Henry moved to stand behind you pressing a kiss to your hair.

"They are brilliant! So good I'm so proud of every thing you have achieved and I want them on our book shelf, in the living room" he said making you tear up.

"Really? You... You think their that good?" you whined eyes blurring with tears as you hugged the first book to your chest.

"absolutely poppet now go on, you do the honours~" he said pressing your shoulder urging you to go to the cube bookshelf.

You tiptoed over to it and slowly pulled out each little custom book with your banner on the front.

You sat down placing each one delicately on the shelf the five books each lining up with one another half filling the empty cube shelf.

"oh no baby look? The shelf isn't full is it? You know what that means" he said standing looking

"I-I've gotta write?" you asked sniffling weeping softly but this time because you were happy.

"exactly! You need to fill the whole shelf, so you keep up the good work and tell daddy when you finish your next story and we can keep adding to it!" he said cheerfully walking over handing you the tablet.

You smiled to yourself and looked to the books, your books- actual real life books on a shelf!

You grinned throwing yourself at him latching onto him feeling your confidence come back just from seeing how much you had done.

Suddenly the hate didn't matter, your daddy like them enough to make them into real life books! And even annotated them himself?

And if your writing was good enough for your daddy then it was good enough for you.

"daddy, can I have my screen time now, I want to write!!" you said jumping up and down on the spot excited to start your next chapter.

Henry grinned nodding deciding you can have as much screen time today as you wanted as long as it meant you wasn't giving up your new hobby.

#oh-for-fic-sake ask #oh for fic sake ask #oh for fic sake headcannon #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill #henry cavill x little!reader

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penzyroamin · 3 years

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Food and sharing food continues to be a recurring motif in “tied together”. What was your thought process around that? How do you see that connecting to some of the central themes and concepts in the story as a whole? (And, if you would like to go into this, how do you see food and sharing food playing out in the messy au where David will also be cooking but in a completely different context/power dynamic?)

HAHAHAHA! I CAN FINALLY TALK ABT THIS WITHOUT SEEMING LIKE F SCOTT FITZGERALD BEGGING PEOPLE TO KNOW WHAT THE GREAT GATSBY WAS!!!!!

okay. im calm now.

so for a couple years now i have deeply and secretly loved the concept of food as a symbol for community. i didnt use it in fic for a long time for a variety of reasons. one, it just never really felt right. two, my love of this symbol is very much connected to my southern-ness, and while im sure many people have just as strong, if not stronger connections between food and community, i didnt really know if people reading my stuff would Get It or connect w it.

i finally decided to use it for tied together for two reasons. first, this is my most definitively southern fic. ive written other fics with Humid Small Town Energy but this is my first that i really let myself go “fuck it. crawfish boils. hurricanes. middle aged women with crushes on jim cantore.” as such, it felt like if i was going to go for this symbol at any point, it needed to be with this fic. the second is that due to Pandemic and also living across the country from the majority of the family i grew up with, i have been kind of starved of community experiences as of late. i wrote tied together entirely during a period when i havent spent time with anyone besides my immediate family, so i was really thinking about community and the nature of it and how fucking badly i wanna have a massive meal with people and hence... this symbol

with the background of my decision to include it covered, let’s get into how it appears in tied together!!

in chapter one, the majority of food’s appearances are... impersonal, if that makes sense? its all premade, whether its drive-through stuff, tv dinners, etc etc, and he doesnt know the person who made it. its also worth pointing out that around the time jack and his mom stop sharing meals is the point they become disconnected from each other. essentially, that’s the disconnect from community throughout jack’s early life

davey comes around and it. is pretty obvious from the start that, through this symbol, he is the Literal Embodiment Of Connection To The People Around Him. food was a really key way for me to show just how connected he is to his community-- he’s constantly cooking for other people, working for battalion, helping people get good food, contributing recipes to little cookbooks. the end chapter also nods to this in the scene w his family where esther mentions he made her teach him to cook for a group, and the conversation afterwards where he mentions that he wouldn’t be comfortable with people paying him to make them food or making food for strangers. cooking for other people is essentially davey’s way of nurturing the community around him and becoming closer with people, so to make food in an impersonal way goes against everything he knows about food and sharing it. the interactions he has through food represent the larger relationships and interactions he has within his community. juxtaposed to jack, he’s built this little world around him filled with people that he loves and cares for, even if that does lay a heavy burden on him at points. if i ever write something delving deeper into davey in this au, i’ll elaborate further-- but, essentially, davey’s role as The Provider of food for the people around him was a real stand-in for the way that he feels both within his family and his larger community.

think of it this way-- in all the scenes we see with davey cooking at a large event-- i.e., the crawfish boil-- he’s always pushed off to the side by that. there’s usually someone talking to him or checking in on the food, but he’s not able to be engaged in the larger hubbub and discussion of the party because he’s busy. it’s in providing food for people and sharing that with him that he gets fulfillment out of the experience. in his family, we see that davey is a little bit isolated. he was growing up at the exact time when mayer’s alcoholism was getting worse and hitting its peak, and he left before mayer ever really managed to get very far into recovery. his time in their house, essentially, was a lot of heavy lifting and few moments of solidarity and joy. he loves his family, of course, it’s just a very labor-intensive process. and then, of course, he has a similar experience to what a lot of southern marginalized people feel-- this intense need to care for and better your community when your community very frequently doesn’t care for you. davey has absolutely zero capacity for apathy in this au, and it definitely shines through with this whole dynamic. he works SO HARD to care for people, even if he isnt always able to fully enjoy being around them and being loved by them

and then, of course, you have the way davey and jack interact through this motif-- davey teaches jack how to cook, gives him a cookbook, invites him over for meals, etc etc. sharing that with him essentially represents welcoming jack into his community as a whole, and giving him a place there. jack mentions davey “clearing a spot at the table” for him, and that’s both literal and figurative.

additionally, while davey uses food as a way to bring jack into his community, jack also makes davey a little less isolated. in a lot of the scenes in chapter 5, theyre cooking together, in a very domestic, symbiotic sort of way. i wanted this to demonstrate how jack relieves some of the burden davey puts on himself and exists sort of Within davey’s bubble rather than just reaping the benefits

i also wanted to illustrate with this how jack repairing his relationship w food keys into this. obviously we have the disconnect that he has early on where his unfamiliarity w what he eats and who makes it represents a larger disconnect between him and the people around him, but jack does also absolutely use food as a coping mechanism and a crutch. not to get, again, TOTALLY gatsby here, but he’s chasing that sense of community and belonging and understanding in the wrong places. it’s once he begins to actually make food for himself and understand the process of it and be able to carry something through to completion that he’s able to actually Enjoy food, yknow? i wanted that to mirror the way throughout the earlier parts of his life that he tried to kind of slap up temporary relationships and make do with that.

side note about jack and food: jack has undiagnosed adhd (and some vague comorbidities rip) in this au, and his experiences with it i preeeetttty heavily lifted from my life and my special brand of fucked in the head. (for those of you who don’t know, carb and sugar cravings are a symptom of adhd, hence why food is often a coping mechanism for us fhskdhs). cooking and baking are processes that have REALLY helped me get a handle on myself-- it gives me an outlet for movement and stimulation, and its something that i can carry through till the end and get an actual end product that i can recognize and benefit from. plus, real time consequences if i let something do whatever for ten more minutes! so thats another element i added to the way that jack builds healthier coping mechanisms over time-- he moves away from food as a crutch and instead develops a new form of CREATING that gives him an outlet and a feeling of productivity

those are some Vague thoughts. i will probably elaborate in the future!

now, for the messy au, rather than food symbolizing community, i chose to have it represent vulnerability.

a quick review: jack married rich, and davey is jack’s new wife’s cook. on his wife, dorothy’s part, i wanted this to shine through in this squeaky clean, pristine image that a lot of rich people try to craft. she never cooks for herself, never pays much attention to davey, never draws attention to him. in essence, she is creating as few weak spots as possible-- she refuses to be vulnerable to the people and the society around her.

with davey, however, his and his family’s livelihood depends on him cooking for this woman, and later for her and her husband. he��s forced into this position of extreme vulnerability and weakness by his financial situation, and cant really regain his sense of privacy or self because of that. its also a point in this story that he has very little time or wherewithal to cook for his FAMILY. so, his job forces him into a vulnerable situation with complete strangers who hold an upper hand over him but denies him the opportunity to be vulnerable with his own family, only reinforcing this idea that he is the protector and the provider and as such cannot have weak spots and cannot, under any circumstances, break

it also really highlights the difference between jack’s relationship with his wife vs with davey and smalls-- all the scenes of he and dorothy eating together are in grand, fancy rooms, with a certain amount of pomp and circumstance and dignity attached. with davey and smalls, though, he’s usually in the kitchen, having conversation, enjoying their company, helping them with menial things. that’s an environment that he’s used to and comfortable with, the kind of relationships and interactions he grew up with, while the stuffiness of his life and interactions with dorothy are entirely less vulnerable and close

that’s just a brief overview, but its something to look for when i finally finish the fic! it definitely started as a very soapy sort of thing, but my damn instincts pushed me to delve deeper into the characters and their relationships and the fucked-up-ness of it all. so, here we are

i really hope this helped!!!! this is not organized AT ALL so please tell me if there’s anything else you wanted to know or any details you noticed

#holy FUCK is this long..#about writing #tied together #asks #thank u so much for giving me an excuse to positively SCREAM abt this

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pocket-clown · 4 years

Text

a journal mishap;

// original request: Ooooh I don't know if you've done this before but could you write a fic where the reader finds Arthurs journal and reads his notes about them? Like what would he write about?? How'd he react to reader confronting him about it? 😳

thank you for the request, anon!

Summary: After not realizing that he, in a tired haze, had dropped his journal on the bus, Arthur is ultimately forced to admit his feelings for you - which to his surprise, end up being much more reciprocated than he thought.

Words: 2,970

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Arthur could feel his heart practically seize up in his chest once he shrugged off his hoodie and realized that his journal wasn’t tucked into the waistband of his pants like it usually was.

He always kept it there on therapy days. Always.

He had brought it with him, right? Of course he did - his social worker asked him to, so he always made sure that he did. She even read some of it today, much to his surprise and ultimate discomfort, but she gave it back and he remembered folding it and tucking it into his sweater like he always, always did.

So where was it?

“Happy?! Is that you?” His mother’s shout for him momentarily brought Arthur down from his panic, though it was short lived.

“Of course it’s me, mom. Who else would it be?” He sighed, though his tone was gentle as he slipped off his shoes, leaving them in front of the door before making his way further into the apartment where Penny was sitting in her chair as some old news rerun played on their small television. She only glanced up at him for a second as he moved the pillows on the couch around, just checking so he could be sure that he actually did bring his journal with him today and didn’t leave it hidden away at home.

“Well you never know with this city, anymore. Just today there was another break in - it’s very unsafe here.” Penny nodded towards the television as the newscaster went on to talk about an apartment burglary that wasn’t too far from their own building that occurred recently - recently, as in almost a week ago, but Arthur didn’t feel the need to point that out. He didn’t know what the point of replaying old broadcasts was, but at the moment he didn’t really care.

“Oh, ma - you don’t think I could protect you?” Arthur teased, taking a seat on the couch so he could actually rest a moment for the first time all day. “No one’s gonna bother us - we don’t have anything they’d want, anyway. Are you hungry? Do you want some dinner, now?”

He didn’t miss the flash of doubt that crossed his mom’s face in regards to his comment about protecting her, but still smiled once she nodded and said that he should at least eat something, too, because he “always looked so tired, now.”

His journal wasn’t on his desk, either, he saw as he made his way into their small kitchen so he could heat up her dinner. His panic was only growing as the seconds ticked by, and he absolutely racked his brain while he thought about where he could’ve possibly left it. He hadn’t stopped anywhere on his way home from seeing his social worker - work was much earlier that day, and he didn’t need to go to the pharmacy - so there was no place he could’ve accidentally left it at.

So where was it?

While waiting for his mom’s TV dinner to heat up did he pace the small kitchen, briefly considering asking her if she saw it around - but he knew there really would be no point in that because he knew that he brought it with him for the day, so she wouldn’t have seen it around. That, and the fact that his mom really didn’t need to know that he’d lost his journal; “sometimes I don’t know where your head is” she’d always say with a sigh, and he’d always been so careful with it, insisting that he wouldn’t lose it, that he couldn’t - because not only did it have his private thoughts in it, but it also contained his original comedy material that he didn’t want just anyone else getting their hands on.

“Happy, did you take the bus home? The weatherman said it’s going to rain again, tonight.” Penny called from the other room, oblivious to her son’s turmoil.

Arthur opened his mouth to respond, but before he could, he was hit with the realization;

The bus.

The bus!

He must’ve dropped it on the bus!

The bus - which was long gone by now.

Arthur groaned, before he turned around and thud his forehead into the refrigerator out of frustration.

----------

"i dont think shed even be inturestid"

“im too old anyway”

“shes pretty. she has a nice smile.”

“would she be mad if she knew i followd her again?”

Though not spoken aloud, the words read loud and clear inside your head. Sentence after sentence about who you presumed to be yourself filled one of the many pages of the journal you’d found on the seat of the bus, crude drawings of what looked an awful lot like you in your sweater lining the margins.

It was Arthur’s journal that you held in your hand, indicated by the scratchy writing on the front label that read Arthur Fleck. Of course you didn’t know this when you initially found it; it was already flipped open, haphazardly plopped in the corner where the bus seat met the wall, as if it had fallen there without its owner realizing so after they got up. It was flipped to a page full of messy handwriting, and at first you were just planning on shutting it and handing it to the driver in case the next day someone came around looking for it, but then your eyes fell on your name with smiley faces scribbled all around it at the top of the page.

At first you figured it must’ve been a coincidence; Gotham had a few million people living in it, no doubt did at least a handful of them share a name with you, so this could’ve been about anyone - but that’s when you scanned the page and saw details about you specifically written down, accompanying the aforementioned drawings, and it hit that the was writing about you. You’d flipped to the cover for a second as you sat down in your seat, no choice but to as the bus had begun moving, and that’s when you saw that it belonged to Arthur and your heart fluttered in your chest.

Did Arthur really feel this way about you? You questioned as you peeked where you’d left off, for a second time.

“got to find a way to talk to her more”

“shes the only one thats nice to me”

“i reelly really like her”

You quickly flipped the notebook shut for good this time, pressing it’s worn body to your lap before sinking back into your seat.

This was Arthur’s personal journal - his personal thoughts - you couldn’t just go through it like that, no matter how much you may want to.

You knew Arthur was troubled; not that he was dangerous or anything, even though some of the other tenants in the building spoke of him like that was the case, but within the months that you’d known him the two of you had grown fairly close and you’d learned enough about him to know that he struggled with much more than most people would ever even come close to. It broke your heart, if you were being honest; he tried, he tried so hard to better himself and take care of his mother and try to make those around him smile - but so often did those same people, and at times did it seem like life itself, figuratively and sometimes literally in the case of the former, spit on him.

You both shared a bus; the stop was a level down from the street your apartment building was on, so you’d always walk there and wait for the bus when you needed somewhere to go, and a handful of times had you bumped into Arthur, him being nothing but polite - shy, he seemed at times, but you were the same way so you didn’t mind. On some days, though, he didn’t even need to tell you that he’d had a bad day - the way he’d barely lift his head to look at you as you passed by said more than any words ever could.

Arthur usually got home around this time, and considering you found a belonging of his, you realized you must’ve literally just missed him through the hustle and bustle of the crowd as everyone poured out of and refilled the bus. If you’d found it sooner, you would have run right off the bus to find him and return it, but within moments of getting on said bus and within seconds of finding it, the bus had began moving, and you were ultimately forced to keep hold of his journal for the next who-knew-how-long.

Delicately did your fingers trace the edges of the journal as you gazed out of the window as the bus moved through the streets, taking you to your location after making a few stops to exchange passengers. You mulled over the situation; how would you even approach Arthur about this? Just knock on the door and hand it to him? Leave it in front of the door? Should you even mention that you read some of it? With the way he wrote about you, you felt that you shouldn’t because it seemed so personal that you worried the poor man would die of humiliation if you told him you knew how he felt about you, but you kind of wanted to. You’d be a big liar if you said that the way he wrote about you didn’t make your heart flutter, and you’d be an even bigger liar if you said you didn’t feel the same way.

It would be awkward - but you needed to return it to him, and you hoped you would be home early enough to do it tonight.

----------

Almost two hours later at nearly eight in the evening did you finally return, and within those same two hours had Arthur practically driven himself up a wall with anxiety regarding his missing journal.

His mother, barely awake next to him on the bed as they engaged in their almost-nightly routine of watching the Murray Franklin show had seemed blissfully unaware of her son’s restlessness, and Arthur could hardly stop himself from flying to the door once he heard a knock at it, praying that it was some sweet stranger who was kind enough to somehow manage to track down the owner of the notebook they’d found.

Though it was no stranger, Arthur was still relieved when he opened the door, a fond smile on his face once he saw who was on the other side.

“Oh - Y/N, hey.”

“Hey, Arthur.” You paused for a beat, not sure how to say what you wanted to. “Are you missing anything?”

“Oh, no? I don’t think so.” His voice was quizzical; he seemed a bit caught off guard by your odd question as he’d taken a second to respond. He needed to play it cool and not trouble you, he thought to himself, but after a second of contemplation he figured that it was best to admit that he had indeed misplaced something - you were always nice to him, maybe you would help him find it. “Actually, I’m missing -”

“This?” You cut him off, holding out the worn notebook to him before he slowly took it from you, his eyes looking between your own and it a few times.

“Where did you…?”

“The bus. It was in my seat. I realized it was yours after I closed it and saw.. your…. name.”

You sighed, eyes closing once you realized you had pretty much just admitted that it was open and that you had read it, to some degree. “I mean - I didn’t really read much of it. If I had known it was yours then I wouldn’t have read it at all, I just - didn’t know what it was. I didn’t read a lot.”

Arthur’s eyes went wide at this, and he looked absolutely petrified.

“What… did you read…?”

“Oh! It was nothing, it was just - ah - ,” You pause, your hand finding its way to your face and you scratched at your cheek, shifting awkwardly in place. You’d lie, if you could; you’d save yourself the embarrassment of admitting that you had snooped, and Arthur the embarrassment of knowing that you had read his personal writing.

“Am I really the only one that’s nice to you?” Quickly, barely above a whisper, did you blurt out your question. You honestly didn’t know how else to answer his question, other than with one of your own.

Arthur was dead silent as he stood in the doorway in front of you, his hands squeezing the sides of his journal as he stared you right in the face, and you couldn’t bring yourself to break eye contact with him.

“Y/N - about that, all that... I’m - I - ,” He looked like he was about to die. Arthur brought his hand to his neck - he could feel a laugh beginning to choke up in his throat - and he turned his head away from you as he tried to keep himself calm, his voice strained as he managed to choke out a remorseful “I’m sorry.”

“You’re really the only one that’s nice to me, too, you know.” You said, your voice soft. It was true; everyone else in Gotham was so damn rude all the time - but not Arthur. Not your sweet, albeit troubled neighbor.

Arthur let out an abrupt laugh at this, immediately slapping the hand that wasn’t squeezing the life out of his journal over his mouth. He refused to make eye contact with you, fearing that doing so and seeing the look of disgust and judgement that you absolutely, without a doubt had would push him over the edge and cause him to erupt into a full-blown fit.

“I mean it - I like how you wrote about me, Arthur. I really do. I’m sorry that I snooped - and I’m sorry that I’m kinda making it worse right now by going on about it.” You almost laughed, the heavy regret you felt weighing down on you, your face feeling hot. Never in the short time that you knew him did you see Arthur get angry, but you felt that he was probably pissed at you for going through his personal diary like you had, and you wished you could’ve gone back in time and just gave it to him and said you found it on the ground, or something.

Unbeknownst to you, though, Arthur wasn’t pissed. He wasn’t angry, he wasn’t even mad. The look on his face once he finally managed to look at you was one of pure perplexity, rather than anger; he looked, if anything, like he didn’t believe you. He looked like he expected this to be some big, cruel joke.

“I shouldn’t have read it, I’m sorry, but… now that I know how you feel - I should probably admit that I feel the same way.” You whispered the last bit, afraid that maybe you’d totally misinterpreted Arthur’s writing and it, in fact, was about someone else, or that his feelings for you had gone down the drain now that he knew the context surrounding how you’d learned about them in the first place.

“No - you can’t,” He choked out in between the laughter he was trying so hard but ultimately failing to suppress. “Why would you like me?”

The amount of utter disbelief in his voice expressed at the mere idea of you liking him back was heartbreaking, to say the least. Whether the tears in his eyes were from sorrow or his laughter (which you knew the reason behind; one of your first meetings with him was rather awkward and in the end he’d been forced to hand one of his condition cards over to you as he broke down in a fit) you had no clue, but they didn't keep you from stepping up to him, closing most of the gap that was between the two of you as you took one of his hands gently in your own.

“Arthur, I really mean it. Hey… if I didn’t, do you really think I’d still be standing here?” You spoke, and when Arthur failed to take his eyes off of the ground to look into your own, you tilted your head ever so slightly so you could get a better look at his face before you took a peek over his shoulder, into his apartment. “Hey, is your mom awake? Would you be able to step away and come to my apartment for a bit, so we could talk? I’d really like to do that, but only if you’re comfortable with it.”

You hoped that smiling how you did at Arthur once he finally raised his head, tears in his eyes, was enough to convey how sincere you were in your words. You wouldn’t play with his feelings like that - you couldn’t, even if you wanted to (though why anyone would want to was beyond your imagination), and you honestly expected him to reject your suggestion and slam the door in your face under the impression that you were. When he didn’t though, and instead tightened his grip around your own hand ever so slightly, a scoff of a laugh leaving him, you felt your heart thud with relief.

“I don’t - are you sure?” His voice was still tight, though not as much as before, and you hoped that was an indicator that he wasn’t as worked up. When you nodded in response and told him that of course you were sure, you could almost see the relief wash over him, and though you knew that it would take some time on both parts to really let it sink in that your feelings were mutual, you were more than happy to spend said time with him.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

taglist (adding hours later because in my rush out the door it completely escaped my mind to add this o o p s sorry!);

@tahliamalfoydepp @tsukiakarinobara

#arthur fleck #arthur fleck x reader #arthur fleck x you #joker #joker 2019 #joker x reader #joker x you #joker 2019 x reader #joker 2019 x you #arthur fleck imagine #joker imagine #mine #i feel like their dialogue reads a bit stiff but i didnt have time to fix it before i left and wanted to get this out already so :^)

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cryptvokeeper · 3 years

Text

YKNOW WHAT NOWS ACTUALLY AN EXCELLENT TIME TO WRITE THE GODDAMN IDEAOLOGY ESSAY

ok so FREEDOM RIGHT

HERES THE THING ABOUT FREEDOM IN EARLY LMANBURG VS MANBERG AND NEW LMANBURG

I’ve sorta memed before about how L’Manburg’s original fight for freedom resonates with the queer/oppressed experience but lets elaborate on that properly. Its well tread ground by now to mention that the only reason lmanburg was created was because its founders wanted to sell drugs. its often used as point of criticism, but I dont see it that way. Putting the ethical and moral dilemma of the situation aside, the real meat of what the drug peddling represents is the idea of a societal taboo. I mean, I can think of plenty of logical reasons letting someone sell drugs unchecked is a bad idea, but morality is completely relative. From a purely social standpoint, the only reason not to do it is because society considers it a taboo. And this is the principle LManburg was originally started on; the desire to buck societal norms and act the way you want, not the way that the culture considers correct. This is the part that tends to resonate with oppressed populations. If the society you were raised in considers your existence outside the norm and treats you with scorn for it, you’re gonna see the parallels to a narrative about people existing outside of that society. And thats what the original lmanburg is. I think most of the folks in the nation would laugh at this, but L’Manburg began as a literal safe space. A place created for individuals who feel marginalized to get away from the forces oppressing them, or, put another way, “A place where men could emancipate the brutality and the tyranny of their rulers.” This is also where the walls come into play. From a L’Manburg perspective, the walls were a necessity for protection, to keep the opposing and oppressing forces out, and the way Manberg tears them down is...really telling.

Because ok, we just established that with LManburg, the founding ideal is freedom from the existing system. Fuck the system, we dont need it and we’re happy without it. Its basically the im a weirdo speech from riverdale. Manberg’s ideals are...a bit less extreme. For Manberg, the big idea is freedom within the system. Manberg seeks not to succeed by abandoning societal norms, but to succeed within the restrictions of those norms. That’s why they tear down the walls, enforce taxes on citizens, expand the borders, seek to build things like office buildings and hotels. Even the festival can be read this way, as an event inviting the rest of the world into Manberg, as a way to establish legitimacy and gain acceptance by the greater culture. You may also notice the strong capitalist and possibly neoliberal imagery/motifs here.

and that brings us to New Lmanburg. Which is now having something of an identity crisis, personified near-perfectly by the current conflict. Tommy is, ultimately, still a believer in the original LManburg ideals of freedom outside of the system. His choice to put his discs first is selfish, it is a pursuit of personal happiness over societal expectations. Meanwhile Tubbo (and Quackity and fundy, although they've been shown to waver, so Tubbo is the main focus) represents the Manberg ideal of succeeding within the system, trying to remain on good terms with the SMP and not do anything to draw their anger, even if that means personal sacrifice. And the thing is, I don’t see either party as wrong. Both views are totally, completely valid.

If you choose to act within the system, you will always be limited on the amount of real change you can make, because you are still restricted within an oppressive system that is frequently historically against you. By trying to work within Dream’s framework, Tubbo is ultimately still giving Dream what he wants; Control. But he also can keep new lmanburg and its people safe.

When you act outside of the system, you lose the framework and infrastructure that the system provides. You alienate potential allies and resources, and you have to essentially start from the ground up. Tommy has some allies, and his bravery may be admired, but he has no real power behind his idealism, we’ve seen very clearly now that he has no bargaining power with Dream.

And either way, you always run the risk of becoming the very thing you hate; just a new system, with another oppressor.

...god I sound like Technoblade ok LAST SECOND DISCLAIMER; YOUR ADVOCATING OF ANY IDEOLOGY IS WORTHLESS IF IT IS NOT ROOTED IN THE GOAL OF MAKING THINGS BETTER FOR PEOPLE

VIOLENCE IS NOT THE UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE; IT’S FUCKING KINDNESS

#again; im not fucking tagging this dream smp if you find this thats your problem #dream smp #went back and tagged for archive purposes #also god damn I forgot I wrote this

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mistymark · 5 years

Text

nct dream as classmates

renjun

carries like 346342 things in his pencil case

is constantly drawing in his notebook and textbooks

leans over to doodle in the margins of your pages

his notes are really messy tho

rolls his eyes at ur much neater, more aesthetically pleasing notes

but is always willing to give u coloured pens and pencils to keep to a colour theme

is probably shocked to find out he's top of the class and thinks its a joke

but boy is just smart af

but all his word documents are titled like ‘redox fucking reactions’ ‘what the fuck is a chloroplast’ ‘??????????’

sends u all his notes tho

texts u at midnight all the time for no fuckin reason

it always starts with ‘yo are u still awake’

and ur like ‘yeah whats up’

and then he’ll respond with the most RANDOM shit

like what goes through that boys head

‘do u think I should use yellow or orange for the next part of my project’

‘idk send me a photo’

‘no just pick’

‘uh yellow’

‘im gonna go with blue’

either rocks up to classes looking like a god or an absolute mess theres no in between

marches through the halls with his hair a mess and doesnt give a shit

lowkey terrifies the younger students lmao

but will help them out if they ask for it

jeno

good student

studies enough but doesnt stress that much

he's just here for a good time

throws snacks at u when u frown at ur work until u look up at him and smile

lowkey worried about ur mental health

that shy kid that everyone expects to be average at all his subjects but u catch a glance of his tests and theyre all A+

owns a planner

uses it

what

I know

keeps track of a lot of school events bc he has a lot of extra curriculars

tries to get u to join more

(no)

probably knows ur schedule better than u do

‘hey jeno what do u have next’

‘calculus’

‘...’

‘that means you have chemistry’

ur always yelling at him through the halls like ‘OI JENO WHERE U GOING’ to try and find out what subject u have next

walks u to classes even if theyre in the completely wrong direction to his own

you really only have study hall together

but u had a lot of classes in common last year and ur habits of studying together just carried through I guess

has really good fashion sense

lowkey dresses like a fuckboi

donghyuck

sometimes you just wanna punch him in the face tbh

‘hey y/n can I borrow a pencil?’

‘do u have spare paper?’

‘can we share ur textbook’

but ofc u love him sm and he's ur study buddy

studying together mainly ends up with him lying on ur bed throwing a ball up in the air while u sit at ur desk and actually study

is so willing to quiz you with ur flashcards tho

beams so hard when u get something write while he's quizzing u

claims he’ll treat u to coffee afterwards but never does lmao

makes up songs and rhymes to help him remember formulas and equations

recites the quadratic formula song whenever u mention math (even if it has nothing to do with what ur learning)

always suggests going to cafes and parks and stuff to study then spends the entire time doing the opposite of studying

‘come onnn y/n u need to relax a bit’

texts u in the morning to ask u to bring him a spare calculator or something for a test bc he forgot his

claims u to be his life saver

probably has ur contact in his phone as ‘lifeline’ or something equally cheesy

really appreciates u tho

jaemin

literally the #1 study buddy

brings heaps of snacks whenever u study together

when its late he’ll text u and tell u to go to sleep

has every single study tip crammed into his head and regurgitates them all whenever u complain about having to study

furrows his brows when u say u didn't get enough sleep but doesnt say anything

he's probably popular af

flirts with the teachers and laughs when u elbow him to stop

soooo well known ?? like even people at other schools know him ??

has aesthetic notes tho

probably has his own studygram

wears soft sweaters to classes

literally just looks like he has his life in order

gets one bad grade and studies his butt off to improve

‘life is all about improving y/n we cant all be amazing at everything straight away’

keeps u sane tbh

like literally how has he not had a mental breakdown yet its the middle of the year

youve had four just this week

‘do u want me to bring u coffee this morning?’

chenle

studies with u all the time

but he doesnt actually study

he's just waiting for u to finish so u can go catch a movie or go out to eat

stays up late playing video games

*sips coffee* “I havent slept in six days”

doesnt even like the taste of coffee

all the teachers love him tho

like he's playful and cheery but is super respectful too

he's just really good w adults ?

sends u texts during class and u wonder how he hasn't been caught

probably has never had a detention

but has been close to getting one 1289823 times

that kid that carries around one 5-subject notebook and two pens and thats literally it

brings his own lunch but trades it for jisung’s lunchables

sneaks food off ur plate all the time in the cafeteria

smiles at everyone in the hallway

offers u a ride home as much as he can

or he catches the bus with you

and shares his headphones with u

jisung

probably that kid that takes aggressive notes in the back of the class

tells u to shut up during class (and its not so he can focus lmao)

tries to get all his work done in class so he has no homework

groans whenever the teacher gives u activities

makes a face whenever a new slide pops up on the board

lots of question marks in his notes

‘to find the derivative of an exponential, it stays the same?’

‘aerobic respiration occurs in three stages: ????, the Krebs cycle and the electron transport chain’

invites u over to play video games the night before a big test

‘its self care’

shut up jisung we all know u just need an excuse to hang out

the teachers convince him to sign up to be a tutor

makes u come to all his tutoring sessions

you go out to eat afterwards

and just chill on a park bench and eat food truck food until its getting late

offers u his jacket on the walk home

has really red cheeks that are ‘from the cold’

theyre not

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justsomeantifas · 5 years

Text

its 11:59 its still technically tonight so

this is gonna be my reference point to questions abt venezuela, at least regarding things pre- May 19 2019. Its a bit scattered and it may get edited down along the road, but yeah.

short version that draws some similar conclusions: https://www.salon.com/2019/05/17/the-plot-to-kill-venezuela_partner/

one difference in scales that’s important to keep in mind: the lifespan of people is 2-7 decades. the lifespan of colonialism lasts centuries. the lifespan of media memory is a couple years, tops.

Most western narratives of venezuela start meaningfully at chavez, which is a mistake. The focus point in history around which the country flowed was the Caracazo. You probably already know about this, but a massive uprising took place in the heart of Caracas, against decades of dictatorship both formal and informal, after severe instability in the global oil market. The people were hungry, the riots were fiery, and the bullets bled. knows the death toll even now, but its estimated well into the thousands. This happened pre-chavez, and started a cascade of events which brought him into limelight that you can read about here. not gonna go into more venezuelan history, but i talk a bit more here

chavez was democratically elected, multiple times.

in 2002, after his first democratic election, he was kidnapped by US-backed troops and replaced by someone who threw out the 1999 constitution, which was as legitimate as any other made in venezuela’s colonial and violently capitalist history, seeing as it was the first (aka only, so far) of 26 constitutions actually approved by popular referendum. He was reinstated largely due to massive protests in support of him. Maduro however doesn’t really have as much of the charisma and support of chavez, which is creating problems - as well as exacerbating problems created by the economic crises ramping up just around chavez’s death. In 2015, there were elections to the National Assembly, which ended up with the Opposition winning a majority of the seats (which does show that there’s some degree of fairness in the elections, at least verifiably up til that point, yet that isnt rly accounted for when western media describes it as “undemocratic” - many of whom don’t apply the same scrutiny to their own country: such as this UN Human Rights councilor who also happens to be the crown prince of british-iraq, currently residing in the noted democracy of the Kingdom of Jordan, which has no vested interest or control over any particular export of Venezuela.).

This turnout showed most of all that maduro had alienated as many as 2 million of his supporters, who didnt end up voting (though many also voted against him - trying to act on their feeling that whatever they want, its “not this”). This decreasing support also accelerates whats known as “Everyday Sabotage” - people not trusting in the government, and look out for their own interests contra everyone else. This is a danger inherent to tying “Socialism” to a primarily state project.

However 1999 Constitution was never meant as an eternal document & it created mechanisms to call for new popular constitutional referendums to be held. That’s what the “Constituent Assembly” is about, which is what a lot of the western world is describing as him singlehandedly rewriting it (while also being “vague about its contents”), or “created by him”. Elections to the constituent assembly were boycotted by opposition, so that it would be government controlled & look like a sham in the eyes of the broader world. That being said, the assembly was called both as a reaction to losing election but also in response to intensifying crises - it was put forth (i don’t see any reason to believe in bad faith) as a way to come together and figure out how to address the needs that were driving people to protest - to address the desire for “not this”, but bc of the uncertainty, it was easily twistable by reactionaries by putting all emphasis on the former. Also timing corresponds with increasing fears of maduro straying from the path of chavez, the image of scrapping one of his strongest plays for smth unknown is risky - tho if there are other meaningful options given the situation im not sure. And the body’s got at least as much constitutional legitimacy as Guaido (Chapter III)

The 1999 constitution also enabled a recall election to be called against maduro in 2016, bc it was written with particular attention to holding public officials accountable - similar noble commitments helped to end the presidency of Rousseff & bring in Bolsonaro (who was also one of the people spurring on the investigations and whipping up a social base).

(speaking of guaido & bolsonaro)

on Guaido:

part of student group in 2007 protesting against non-renewal of coup-assisting network, who the CFR (one of the major think tanks of the cold war still playing a big role in foreign policy today) considered “most important network”

close friend of Leopoldo Lopez, the aforementioned coup plotter.

politician since 2010, won a couple small elections

Unknown to majority of general population until 2019, most venezuelans surveyed didnt know him

Plan Pais

plans to privatize state owned industry & allow investment from foreign oil companies

center-right neoliberal draped in platitudes of “stability”, “revitalization”, “security”, and “rescue” - a message seemingly deliberately targeted to become more and more resonant with increased sanctions.

/on Guaido

governing is about the expression of power. I wanna live in a world where that power isn’t expressed, but as long as the exploitation of the global working class continues unabated, id prefer some of that power be put towards helping the poor.

there is no such thing as a static state of affairs, there’s no “goldilocks zone” out in the political universe where we tweak things finely until we find whats best for everyone, only different rates of change in different dimensions. what we need to do is figure out how we can push that state of affairs in a direction so that everyday people have the power to take control of their lives. re

re: “constitutionality” - if the supreme court calls it constitutional then its constitutional. period. There’s no such thing as a supreme court as an “independent branch” of government, but there are different degrees of integration into the rest of it.

The Supreme Tribunal of Venezuela has 32 members, (a bit more than a dozen put in by the national assembly, while the PSUV held it), and the opposition holds abt 3 away from a supermajority. Each member of the court holds their spot for 12 years. If that’s “The Most Corrupt In The World” according to Transparency International, i wonder what world the 9-person lifetime-appointed US Supreme Court (2 of which appointed by trump, and save for pulling a Weekend At Ginsbergs, likely 3) is on. In fact, one of the tactics that the more radical circles of democrat voters are putting forward is to pack the Supreme Court. Because thats how shit actually gets done, or at the least how shit is prevented from being committed w the stamp of legality. FDR learned that lesson too, in trying to pass what is today known as “The New Deal”

My comparisons to trump are for specific end: these actions are exerted on levers of liberal democracy, and every single liberal democracy is susceptible to them in some ways.

whats a “dictator”? if hes unelected, the millions of people who participated in the elections dont seem to think so. if maduro is a dictator, then what is donald trump? the majority of ppl didnt vote for him yet hes still governing. macron’s popularity has at several points been less than 1/3, and the yellow vest protestors have been violently attacked - why is he not “a violent dictator with only the support of the military”? These terms are not neutral.

“their elections are highly flawed” So What? show me a country whose elections arent.

“opposition jailed” - ok but coup plotters don’t get off easy in any liberal democracy. If someone - say Bernie Sanders - said “enough is enough” and succeeded in overthrowing the current government with the help of a foreign government…. you think they’d let him go free? what if ten years later he was getting his supporters all riled up to do it again? how long you think he’d be in jail for (assuming he can survive well into his 100’s)? You think more than 13 years? Think he’d get house arrest? Some US states lock you up for posessing weed up to 10. If you stay long enough around this blog, youll find plenty of other examples of much more cruel and unusual punishments. Look at Chelsea Manning, look at Oscar Riviera… look at the US protestors saying Guaido is illegitimate

what we have to keep in mind most of all, is to show that the contradictions being exploited are inherent to Liberalism. Contradictions are just expressed most freely at the margins - the interstices

poor economic decisions happen everywhere - 2008/2009 still affecting the entire world there’s violence thats “natural”, and violence thats “intolerable”. The dividing line is whether we have anything to gain by changing things.

sanctions: started under obama, originally targeted specific individuals, used as precedent for more generalized. They’re indirect - they have a “squeezing effect”, takes already-existing problems & just makes them markedly worse. also doesn’t necessarily correlate with emigration, bc it takes a lot of money to start a new life somewhere else, and sanctions disproportionately affect the poor.

war wouldnt likely look like (many) US boots on the ground - we’ve got plenty of other places to be. It’d look like guns being smuggled to counter-protestors. It’d look like sending resources to neighboring countries like Colombia or Brazil who would then use their troops. Colombias ruling party is right wing populists - much of current president’s campaign was run on fearmongering abt venezuelan socialism - they’re raring to go. It’d look like drones https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caracas_drone_attack. Also means there likely won’t be a sudden trigger, its a gradually escalating stressful gradually-more-warlike situation.

If war does break out - where would the refugees go? In reality the majority would go to Colombia, but if anything significant breaks out there will be a stream of those looking to find shelter in the US, which has advertised itself as a beacon of hope - what would happen to them? some may get taken in as a gesture of showmanship, but nowhere close to the majority.

speaking of the US - imagine if trump and bolton manage to actually plot a winning coup. Do you think that that wont be his main bullwark against ppl like Bernie? you think the media and rest of the democratic party wont jump on that narrative and “begrudgingly” support a fascist because the alternative might mean supporting single payer and not-having-good-for-ratings-climate-apocalypse?

another term thrown around without regard is “once vibrant” - for whom?

most articles ive seen just take this as an axiom, and dont find any cognitive dissonance when also saying chavez reduced poverty hugely.

The answer to that rhetorical question: Citgo is venezuelan, before chavez none of the wealth went back to venezuela - thats what “vibrancy” means.

many similarities with BP (the-artist-formerly-known-as-the-anglo-iranian-oil-company)

in age of climate change & vocal ppl about phasing out oil, the more one’s livelihood is connected to oil, the more unstable ones country will be - either that, or the more instability ones country will cause.

“Oil exports fell by $2,200 per capita from 2012 to 2016, of which $1,500 was due to the decline in oil prices.”

The drop in price that affected the venezuelan economy so much in 2014 was largely by US shale fracking

in 1970’s Chile, copper was the main product of Chile - allende nationalized the mines, and in return wall street dropped the

(also worth noting that venezuela’s got non-insignificant untapped shale basins)

At least venezuela used the oil money to fund social programs instead of like, pad the pockets of Raytheon.

also oil price wars in africa highly correlated w oil (whose annual production doesn’t even combined total venezuelas)

a couple ppl have raised concerns abt my strong stance on equivocal dismissal - if there’s a difference, if there’s some way of reading your statement that says “X country that the State Dept wants to invade is an anomoly in the otherwise free world”, then that’s acting to push the discourse towards normalization & invasion. It’s not “whataboutism”, just basic consistency.

now more than ever, narratives are affected by people. They may not be ones we had a hand in forging, but the way that we propagate them actually does have measurable effects on the larger-scale political outcomes. Always look for the base assumptions, as well as the direction

sure denounce Chavez. sure denounce Maduro. denounce Kim, Xi, Castro, anyone. But if there’s no equally or proportionally loud denunciations of the horrors perpetrated by allies - the “assumed”, “natural” violence, then you’re acting to reinforce the narrative of exceptionalism.

Just make sure after you take a breath, you denounce Saudi Arabia & Yemen, Israel for Palestine, the conditions which brought Argentinian/Brazillian, Brazilian coup, the US for Puerto Rico, the conditions which have murdered dozens of journalists in Mexico per year…

what people want most of all is stability. “A debate over whether it is mismanagement and corruption by the Maduro government or the sanctions that are the author of the crisis is largely irrelevant. The point is that a combination of the reliance on oil revenues and the sanctions policy has crushed the policy space for any stability in the country.”

government’s errors and tensions

fixed exchange rate -> black market

took 5 years to address changing relation between dollar & BsF, all the room between those two curves left a huge room for intensifying crises, though since it also corresponds with the death of chavez, it sorta makes sense.

antidemocratic actions and remarks by maduro

scattered responses filled w half-solutions

diversification needed, but how do you diversify an economy filled with rampant poverty, malnutrition, illiteracy…

(nominally begrudging) support for mineral extraction 12.4% of territory opened to extraction - “Special Economic Zone” as a method of managing decay

this is also what much of the reality of “economic diversification” looks like

not enough socialism. (even fox agrees!) Venezuela shows the limits of Social Democracy in countries living outside of the Imperial Core - esp the dangers if you’re in the crosshairs already bc of oil

started out as populism, gradually grew as confronted more. shows shaping influence on political organs from actions of foreign actors - if you’ve survived a coup before, you’re gonna become paranoid about any more of them - especially when the coup plotters say “hey lets do more coups”

also shows the weakness of only having a small number of charasmatic faces representing the movement - if one dies and theres no clear and popular replacement, then you’ll lose ppl who were largely brought in by the charisma, weakening your political project, and creating cracks for reactionary forces to take advantage of - especially in times of transition.

bourgeoisie still control a majority of the economy. Capitalist businesses are internally unaccountable, and in this age of intensified global trade, one can punish countries for straying from the pack by moving business & focus away. If you’re looking for dictatorships, look at the thousands of private companies run as dictatorships daily

capital flight is a real effect, precisely because socialism is fundamentally and irreconcilably against the self-interest of the bourgeoisie. not necessarily against the interest of the humans-who-are-also-bourgeois, but of the impersonal self-sustaining force of capital.

Have you ever pulled something out of an electrical socket, and seen a quick spark? The reason that occurs is bc of what’s called an induction current, which is a fancy physics word for flowing electricity not liking to suddenly change its flow. If you accidentally touch that spark, you might feel it, but youll live to tell the tale. But if you only take the plug out halfway & touch it, that’s a different story. Capital flows similarly.

my country (lithuania) has been facing sky-high emigration since the collapse of the USSR (with an added boost after 08-09), we have also consistently had one of the highest suicide rates in the world (#7), a minimum wage of about 3 Euros an hour (after a recent increase), as well as one of the highest prison populations in Europe (discounting Russia & Belarus… which like….)

when are we gonna be invaded? when will the US media talk about our pain?

oh wait, they did. We cried all pretty for the TV cameras, then they got a bozo nobody really knew of to denounce the government, who they called dictatorial (though it was far from ideal, massive bureaucracies dont tend to mix well with single-person-decision-making). And to be fair, the fact that the government was unpopular wasnt entirely undeserved. But what was promised to us was the idea of “Freedom”, “Free Enterprise”; to “Get Rid of Corruption” and institute “Real” Democracy". They said we’d be integrated into the glorious capitalist west, and we understood that to mean that we’d be in the position of a Germany, or at least an Austria or smth. But they never meant to integrate us into the imperial Core, we have always been seen as part of the Periphery - the “assumed” violence that “naturally” happens.

Then we got to where we our today. Some of the stuffs more available, but expensive. Most of the bureaucracy’s still around, it just helps fewer people. We stand as an example of what to expect, in one of the best case scenarios, you would join our emigrees now making up a significant percentage of underpaid house-servants aka maids across the EU.

if we want the people of Venezuela to be healthy, safe, and fulfilled, then:

speak out and pointing to the effects of US sanctions is incredibly important. They’ve already killed 40,000 people in the last year, and 300,000 more are in extreme danger (and millions more in long-term risk).

what does it mean when you simultaneously sanction trade with a place but also demand they let you give them humanitarian aid?

if there is to be action taken by the international community, then the US has forfeited its right to speak. They threw it away once in 2002, and obama rhetorically picked it up and dusted it off so that trump could throw it in a bigger dumpster, thats also on fire. However we also still live in a world deeply shaped by US Hegemony, so the opinions of its close trade partners & closest-knit media buds should be seen as influenced as such. Doesn’t mean that theyre wrong on everything too, but they still feel the magnetic pull of the US economy and ecosystem (as well as their own potentially imperial interests) and the effect of that force cannot be discounted.

transitioning our economies away from oil & away from globalized neoliberalism which only values peripheral states by their exports - dissolves tensions of how to produce in unproductive terrain

socialize medicine in the US, so that drug companies run by dictatorships can’t control their lives & ours. healthcare is especially reliant on imports, sanctions affect especially strongly.

normalize the ideas of Socialism, without taking the easy way out of “oh no dont think of Venezuela, think of sweden or denmark”. None of them are Socialist, but to avoid the complexities of Venezuela is to imagine that US attempts at socialism wouldn’t involve significant capital flight. If we don’t consider that, if we don’t have solid actionable plans to deal with that, while also facing the inherent complexity of changing material conditions, then we’re gonna waste whatever shot we get.

redirect conversation normally centered around government towards support of the tens of thousands of small business co-operatives, where people live their daily lives in a democratic manner.

on The Communes:

“delegating responsibility throughout all members, and bringing important decisions to the whole to work through and find the best possible solution… They create “collective criteria” together; agreements stipulating whether individuals have power over certain decisions or whether it is up to the whole group. However, he assures that these “are not rigid, they can change at any moment.” The cooperative I lived with in Venezuela had regular organizational meetings where they informally came to agreement and were even able to come back to re-evaluate decisions that didn´t seem to be satisfactory for the whole group in this same way. Decisions and decision making, in this way, are viewed as a process not contained by meetings and discussions in board rooms, but are always being analyzed and made better by the process of putting them into action, and not only by thinking them out and writing them down.”

- the “Self Government of the Producers” - aka what it looks like for cooks to govern.

they have communal councils as well - neighborhood councils in the same vein that so many (rightfully) find inspiring in Kurdistan . They preexisted chavez, but they were able to proliferate and be given legal recognition through him. I understand that legal recognition can act to ‘name’ a body & pin it to smth that doesn’t match its requisite variety - how dynamic it is, but imo as its currently legislated it recognizes a good amount of the autonomy that they had already been excersizing. - liable to change government recognition of co-ops has drawbacks too, and correlates negatively with that coop’s success

"A good example of this intention is the de-emphasis that cooperatives in Venezuela put on advertising or “marketing” products, and instead push to find more people to become part of the cooperative, and choose the services or products they provide based on community decisions about what is needed. A cooperative I worked in […] was originally a family owned and operated theater group that traveled around the country performing theater pieces that highlighted social and environmental issues. When they joined the […] cooperative, the larger co-op did an analysis and decided they wanted a natural fruit juice concentrate producer and gave the group a loan to acquire capital and start producing. They have been doing this for only a couple of years now but have already paid back the loan to the larger cooperative and are bringing extra money in to support themselves, better their services, and supply extra funds to the larger cooperative for community projects such as the recently [2012] built community health center…

The cooperative services I experienced and learned about in Venezuela were health, dental, food, and a separate example of trash services. A dental cooperative […] provides quality dental services (I know because I used them) almost every day for affordable prices. You don´t have to be a member of the cooperative, and you don´t have to make an appointment. It takes only a couple of hours, and emergency situations are treated with urgency. The health center, built with funds provided by all the associated cooperatives[…], works the same way. Anyone can go there, the services are subsidized by the cooperative so they are affordable, the clinic and workspaces are clean and well taken care of, and the quality of the service is great. Worker-members of the cooperative receive health care at the facility without charge except for the massage and acupuncture services that they also provide at a really low price.

[…] food services are priced to provide more access to food for the community in which it exists. The original and persistent intention is to make the best situation for people on all ends of the process. The producers are part of the cooperative and are part of the group that decides the prices that growers get, as well as the prices that the food is sold for. This means that both farmers and workers at the market decide what to charge a person, which ultimately affects how much money the growers receive, as well as if the food is affordable for the people who need to eat who live in the city. In a normal capitalist market system these parties are separated and put up against each other, raising prices for consumers and lowering them for small producers, excluding those people from getting enough money to afford all the necessities that are typically only provided at a high price.

One communal council, a parallel governing organization of community members linked to investment funds from the national government, in the city of Merida, Venezuela organized themselves to get funds to buy a trash collection truck. The truck at the time was used for a specific waste removal project that removed waste from their community regularly but was not a traditional collection service. However, they did have plans to expand the project to start their own collection service, and this would be provided by the commal council, an anti-capitalist organization which does not require people to pay for the service. Although this is not a “co-operative” as some hardliner co-operative enthusiasts might point out, it is a horizontal anti-capitalist organization widening access of necessary services to the larger community run by community members; following cooperative values of equity, inclusion, and solidarity I believe this to be an example of cooperative economics and action. It appears to me that economic inclusion is much more likely to widen only when those who are being excluded are included in the process of organizing the services and are in control of the economy.“

until the communes, workers cooperatives, and the like are strong enough to rule themselves, having Maduro in power is the only option given to us which doesn’t trigger the control of reactionaries. People make their own history, but not in situations of their choosing - the exact outcome isn’t predetermined, but there’s only a limited number of poles - gravitational attractors - towards which that trajectory is heading at any particular time.

if maduro acts to squash the power of the communes, then thats a different situation. but until that point, we outside of the country must work to center any discussion on these bodies - they are the heart of the country and of whatever social revolution has occurred/is further possible. They are filled with lessons for us to learn from, and show how rich and dynamic the organized populace can be if they are allowed to control their communities. (ex of dealing with gang violence from @ 22:50)

This is all said with recognition that many chavistas have acted against communes, the bureaucratic machine acts to co-opt much of their energy, its linguistically obscured the concept of "ownership” with that of “control”, and that the state has changed its messages over time. But the heart of the communes is what’s a priority, and they have acted against the government overstepping its bounds & mis-identifying them. But whats important is that there’s a feedback process in the gvt to actually allow them to assert their autonomy. Liberals will do their utmost to close those channels.

If Guaido and the Popular Will take control of power, be assured that whatever gains made in organizing the everyday people of Venezuela will be at the top of the chopping block. How effective that suppression turns out to be is undetermined - it might turn out to strengthen the communes, but that outcome would be damage control, not something to try and bullseye.

Effective Propaganda knows that its more effective to control what’s left out than control what’s put in. Keep that in mind, and study trajectories and forces.

other links:

https://next.podbay.fm/podcast/1363342644/e/1551711604

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Voc08vh9cJY

https://www.counterpunch.org/2013/06/21/a-cowboy-in-caracas/

https://thenextrecession.wordpress.com/2017/08/03/the-tragedy-of-venezuela/

https://www.multpl.com/venezuela-gdp

https://www.jacobinmag.com/2014/04/fivethirtyeights-venezuela-problem

https://fivethirtyeight.com/features/why-venezeulas-middle-class-is-taking-to-the-streets/

https://news.vice.com/en_us/article/bjkmq8/fiery-protest-leader-leopoldo-lopez-faces-13-year-sentence-in-venezuela

https://potent.media/minimum-sentencing-for-marijuana-possession

https://www.thoughtco.com/core-and-periphery-1435410

https://popularresistance.org/building-the-commune-radical-democracy-in-venezuela/

http://www.antiwar.com/regions/regions.php?c=Venezuela

#venezuela #reference #imperialism #chavez #maduro #socialism #capitalism #extraction #oil #war #emigrant #communes #cooperatives

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leviathiane · 4 years

Note

SHOW US YOUR WROR RAW UNPROCESSED WHOLE GRAIN ORGANIC NOTES

this is going to be a long-ass post i am so sorry to Everyone! i take a lot of notes.

So, as You specifically know (as well as all of my lovely Soggers) I take a LOT of notes. Obsessively. I write fucking everything bc i have very little memory and very much paranoia. This results in literal Piles of notes. Raw planning, on paper, on my phone– doodles of scenes im brainstorming, bulletpoints, entire SCRIPTS– it’s all there but scattered (I’ve got scenes planned in the margins of my goddamn anthropology notes and deciphering it was a NIGHTMARE)

I won’t even upload all the photos of my writing notebook, because itd be like 50 pages of illegible nonesense. but heres a couple of planning phase pages. (may be hard to read, I dropped this notebook both into some tidepools, into a creek on campus, and accidentally leaked my waterbottle onto it in my backpack :/)

if you can’t tell already, yes they all look exactly like this. Some are even more illegible, because I wrote them with the notebook half under my actual class notes. Because i wrote most of them in class. During lectures. And pretending very badly that i was not doing exactly that. (pay attention in class please i got away with this bc i was filling up elective units)

I’m also flat out MISSING a large portion of my notes bc some of it? isnt even in the damn notebook. its on a sheet of binder paper, or on the empty back of an assignment. I’ve now lost most of those notes, but the ones i do still have are just as (even more, actually) indecipherable chicken scratch:

Wow, how clean and tidy and easy to follow! i am in hell.

and this doesnt mention the PAGES and PAGES of outlines that are on my laptop, and the pages of outlined scenes that are on the notes app of my phone. if i put them all, you would have entire chapter spoilers up to the very end of the story so i cant post a lot of them– and also theres just a goddamn lot of them. currently i have 16 pages of outlining. There are no spacing breaks. It is a solid 16 page block of text. Looking at it gives me a migraine.

some assorted notes which i have dredged up from the deleted parts of the main draft google doc go all the way back to when i started Wror in June and they are Barely more readable than my handwriting on sheer account of: articulation is not my strength. These include:

“Ch 8 plan: sabo gets trained specially, awakens his armament haki, beats ace in a bunch of spars and proves himself to be anything but vulnerable. The boys are like “we fucking recognize that technique ryu taught you before us!!” and goad ryu into finally starting them both on basic haki training, just to awaken it, since sabo already has. Also this is the chapter that ace finally confronts ryu for his devil fruit after ryu confirms that some devil fruit users can’t be hurt without haki and ace immediately catches onto that and tries to slam his pipe through ryus head. It doesn’t work, ryu catches the weapon with a haki covered hand, to avoid turning to flame with hit and ace just gets frustrated and accuses ryu of hiding his devil fruit, because he remembers what he saw in grey terminal and that now that he has seen haki he can distinguish it from what he saw and he’s sure no one could do what ryu did. He calls ryu a hypocrite for coddling them even after telling them to stop coddling sabo and ryu has to sit them down and explain that yes he does have powers and he has been hdiing it and explains his reasoning. However instead of understanding th eboys just get fired up and say they don’t wnt to be scared of fire, especially not when it means ryu isn’t taking them seriously in a spar. Ryu finally agrees to start them on desensitization training for fire trauma. Fire desensitization training happens on the beach, so that they have water nearby in case things get out of hand. At some point ace gives ryu a considering look and is just like “if you have a devil fruit that means you can’t swim either right?” and ryu is basically just like “lmao yeah” and then ace immediately attempts to drown him. Lots of murder attempts in ace’s department toget his older brother to be less of an idiot with little success lol(extra: ace tried to attack ryu earlier both to confirm that ryu has a devil fruit that would force him to use haki to hide it, and because he now knows that he CAN’T hurt ryu without haki and as thus can’t beat him and make him admit he’s awake without being good at haki.)” [chapter 8]

“Small sabo lost his hat and goggles in the incident and while he doesn’t remember having them future sabo notices he looks uncomfortable and keeps touching his hair and head. Ace yells at him for it thinking he bandaging are bothering him and that he can’t touch them but little sabo just comments that something about it feels wrong. Luffy blurts our that he had a hat, like luffy does, But he doesn’t now ace begrudgingly mentions that they can’t get a new one in town. Future sabo doesn’t even hesitate and just plops his own hat onto his younger selves head. It clearly too big for him, and almost falls over his eyes but he grins up at future sabo and is like “wow!! Thank you! I’ll take care of it till I have one of my own” and creates a paradox like Luffys own hat. The footsteps younger sabo has yet to fill. This HAS to happen AFTER the talk where they explain that future and past sabo are both the same person, to give little sabo that pressure.” [chapter 9]

“(Right after this older sabo takes them down to the ocean so that they can play a little and desensitize themselves and immediately fucks himself over when he goes weak in the water bc he somehow fucking forgot his own devil fruit again and now even younger sabo is on his case about not letting him near the fucking ocean that little goddamn HYPOCRITE—) )” [for chapter 9]

“Ch 9 plan: they finally leave dawn island. Starts with the boys getting a haircut after training and luffy mentions how long it’s been since they’ve last needed a haircut, giving sabo and ace time to point out that it’s been 2 months now since ryu joined them, and that sabo was completely healed by now. The boys are now aware of the basics of haki, and while luffy hasnt awakened either yet ace and sabo both have a little bit of weak armament haki. (sabo won’t awaken observational haki until he gets his memories back) ryu tries to sneak off into the city to steal a boat but his brothers refuse to leave him behind and keep sneaking out after him, not wanting him to go alone and saying that since he’s been training them they’re clearly stronger and he needs to let them do this. Ryu eventually just lets it go because why the fuck not it’s a dream and they make him feel better. They get the boat out on open ocean and finally fucking sail out, cheering loudly, ryu struggling to make them all calm down but also not really trying. He’s happy as shit, and they’re all so excited and happy and sabo dips a hand into the waves and then smiles so fucking wide and tackles ryu so violently they both nearly tip into the water and it’s just very very good. “ [also for ch 9]

** I flat out dont Have any outlining from before chapter 6, because i only started actually outling chapters after that. i tend to just sit down and Write up until i hit a plot point or writers block and then am forced to actually think it through and plan rather than letting it come naturally. thats also why the quality and editing is better in later chapters despite everything being written within the same time frame.

besides entire chapter outlines, there are the scene specific phone notes like:

“(ADDED) Right after they leave dawn, when sabo is sure they’ve gotten enough of a head start, he calls Garp. He doesn’t say who he is, but that all of the boys are safe and happy with him and has them all talk into the phone to assure him that they’re fine. Garp is honestly just pissed off he doesn’t know who’s calling and when he asks sabo just laughs and says a disobedient brat before hanging up. “

“(ADDED) TO EXPAND ON CH 3: sabo gets offered the chance to go with dragon, and he hesitates on the offer to go through with his previous life with the family he’s made in the revolutionary again. He almost agrees, because the bought of losing them in this lifetime is near excruciating but reminds himself swiftly that it’s no place for his brothers and not what they’d really want, and he wants selfishly to be with them as long as he Can until he “inevitably” wakes up. The boys are visibly relieved by this, especially ace. (Sabo gets asked who he is by dragon, who wants to know more about the stranger with his son, but dragon has always been quicker to make connections no one guessed and he just smiled knowingly at sabo and tells him he’s sure the other will have no trouble finding them if he’s in need. Sabo in turn warns him to keep Kuma close, and to look for a slave girl named koala.)”

I have…. many of these. I have Many of Everything.

finally, i have scene doodles. if i hit a bad writers block it usually helps me to sketch scenes or the character designs to regain my grip on what the hell is happening in the plot– Breach of Intention has character design sketches, pakcbond has MANY scene sketches, even some of my nsfw has some sketches. my wror skecthes arent Good of course, I am an art teacher for children and that means i am more often explaining the color wheel and brush techniques over drawing perfect human replicas– and i just dont really make a lot of fanart? ive never drawn sabo before but i sure have a bunch now. i wont include close ups because they genuinely suck but heres an example pic

So… yeah thats about everything. this is a VERY long post and yet i only included like maybe ¼ or 1/5 of all the notes i have dbskhjgfkjadns lmk if anyone wants more (or notes for my Other stories, which contain NO WHERE the same absurd amount of shit that wror does.)

#depths' ask #response #idk what to even tag this honestly?? this post is such a mess abhdsjfgdkjn #thanks mido love u dear 💕🎉 im gonna want some damn notes on second chances heads up #wror #wror stockpile #touchmycoat #i started this response at goddamn 3:52am and its now 4:40am #it took me. almost an HOUR #oh my god

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lost-incident-kid · 4 years

Text

Happy Birthday Miyu Sugisaki (for tommorow) might do some art for her idk

———

Edit: ah heck! Ive had this queued for months, but i forgot to actually do the art haha, i’ll get something done overnight so it might be rushed and look like trash, it might look reasonably ok. Who knows at this point. I dont trust the sleepy version of myself to create anything good but hey, theyv created some stuff that wasn’t horrifying before :/

Ok, starting here i legit just start live-blogging myself staying up alnight drawing. Ignore me. I didnt know where else to say it. I’ll delete it later.

Edit 2: this isnt gonna be done. Like frick, i just spent 6 hours on miyu’s fricking hairstyle, thats all done and even shaded and looking fabulous but ive only got a rough lineart for litterally everything else. This might not be done, but if it is then her hair is gonna be a fuckign masterpiece (i hope). Im writing this edit at 1:42am, and im gonna go to bed somewhere between 4 and 5, lets go! Hell yeah! I might do this! Perhaps! Im gonna try! 3-4 sprint time! Yeah!

Edit 3: frick, im failing to do this, miserably. Its 3:03am and i got distracted playing mobile games and didn’t get anything done. My existence is futile, existentially im a waste and I should not exist. The atoms within me deserve to be part of something better. Sorry. I’m a f*ck up and unless I get my sh*t together in the next like 5 mins (unlikely) then this aint gonna be finished.

Edit 4: ok, meltdown like 20% over. Its 3:52am, I think the issue then was the face. Faces r hard bruh, they suck do draw. They a festive lil ho ho ho. I was drawing everything too high up on the face cuz my dumb *ss forgot to draw the line thingys on the face or even look at a reference image for proportions. Ive done it now amd life is now a bit more on track. Might get this done if I continue work in the morning.

Edit 4.5: nothin much (hence the .5), its 4:14am, just downed 4 cups o tea for caffeine and sugar (all the coffee we got is decaf lol). I’m gonna get this sh*t done! Ive litterally only coloured down to the face, neck and the hair but still.... I’m gonna get it done anyway! I dont care about going to bed between 4-5 anymore! I’m getting this done!

Edit 5: its less than ten mins later (4:22am) and im taking a quick 20m break to watch youtube while I wait for the caffeine to kick in because im too braindead to continue right now. Like what art style am i even trying? Idk... its really fricking complex tho. Lowkey pretty tho, like if i finish this im gonna be so proud of it like it looks great. But its taking forever and im need break.

Edit 6: ok we back. Its 4:41am, caffeine has not really kicked in but i cant permit myself any more time anyway. Back to drawning.

Edit 7: holy frick, new episode of the vrains dub came out. Man... im leaving vrains fanart to watch the vrains dub. Am I obsessed? Is this hyperfixation? Probably? Either way, its 4:50am and im going to go watch the new episode. I’ll come back to this when im done.

Edit 8: HOLY FRICK GUYS! THE DRAWING APP IM USING KEEPS CRASHING AND SAYS ITS STILL THERE BUT WONT LET ME CONTINUE AND KICKING ME OFF THE APP?!?! ITS 5:06AM AND THE PANIC ATTAC IS BACC! The new episode of the dub isnt completely out yet, im watching that version on yt where its just smol clips of it. Not all the clips r up yet. I was just going on it while waiting for the next clips to go up and thats when the app did the thing and life got 280% sucky-er.

Edit: 8.5 wahoot it stopped kicking me off the app and it let me continue. Its 5:12am and we are FINALLY continuing.

Edit 9: its 5:36 Im tired sleep time I’ll finis thos in the morning goodbye yall have a greatt day

Edit 10: ok, so im a failure. We live in the timeline that god abandoned. I cannot sleep. I shall get more cups of tea, watch yt until the caffeine actually kicks in, and then continue. Its 6:03 right now, I shall be back. Perhaps half an hour?

Edit 10.5: its 6:11am. Not much has happened, just a slight change of plans. Ik its irrelevant but im liveblogging so i gotta say, my eye hurts so im gonna stop looking at screens. Perhaps gonna try to sleep again, if not then i’ll put read a book, redo my makeup (it smudgey) or straight up just listen to music and stare into the void. Litterally anything other than look at my laptop/phone. Peace out homies, i’ll be back at some point before 7 probably (unless i do go to sleep).

Edit 11: Its 6:41am, my eye hurts. Ive been staring into the darkness and listening to various fallout boy songs. Now i feel edgy. Its been half an hour, so im gonna continue drawing. Caffeine and sugar has worn off again so im tired and unmotivated but yno what, it is what it is. Aint life nifty, i gotta get this done.

Edit 12: 6:52 everything burns im in pain my eye is on frickign fire and it looks bloodshot but now also weird azz headache that i never got one like this before so im gonna turn off all lights cuz that seems to make it marginally better am i dying probably idk either way im not gonna continue for multiple hours it is stare into the void time and stare into the void time alone ok this should be the last update

Edit 13: It is 3:16pm, didn’t continue liveblogging cuz i got one heck of a migrane. Im back and well... Happy birthday Miyu for today! I’m still gonna try to get this god forsaken art done, but holy shit what is that art style i did. Its genuinely nothing like anything ive done before, I don’t remember doing any of the colouring but apparently I did and it looks better than anything ive done before and idk if non-fricked up me can replicate it. I’m starting to wonder if i got bored and just copied it or something, like idk how i did it. Look at it

The grey is the lineart I remember doing but man tHE FRICKIGN HAIR like i couldnt have created that, could I? I can see why it was taking so long yesterday like holy shit man that stuff takes time yno

#long post

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thegeminisage · 5 years

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Five Headcanons: Snow, Celes, Faith Connors, aaaaaaaand Papyrus

THANK U

SNOW:

cannot read. haha im just kidding (or am i)

sees people not liking him as a challenge. he wants to be the Most Likable Laid Back Guy Ever. sometimes this works in his favor like it did with lightning and sometimes it’s a little overbearing and creepy like with hope (and noel, eventually)

on the flip side he also has a way of…drawing out people’s badness. lowkey spoilers bc you havent gotten there yet but noel within 5 minutes of meeting him winds up talking about some of his most deeply-held pain. i think if people like snow they feel comfortable telling him that stuff and if they don’t he makes them angry enough that it comes out anyway. so he’s like accidentally a human therapy dog without even realizing it.

i think they might actually mention this in canon somewhere in like some of the start menu infodumps or one of the light novels or something but dude was an orphan so i’m sure he wants like All the children. good thing serah also likes kids

this is a REALLY BAD AND PROBLEMATIC HEADCANON but after witnessing them in game 3 i think that lightning, despite being strictly into ladies the other 99% of the time, would have wound up dating him eventually if he wasn’t, like, with serah. i don’t think she’s carrying a torch for him in canon or anything, because it just wouldn’t occur to her to think of her sister’s fiance who is also a dude that way, but in an alternative universe where he wasn’t her sister’s fiance they would have wound up working out pretty well

CELES:

i think like lightning she’s mostly into ladies so when locke comes along and she’s into him it’s sort of like ??? oh damn okay

i like celes/terra fine but i strongly prefer a sisterly relationship because they’re SUCH good foils. i think when celes was around terra prior to the start of the game she tried to find ways to be kind to her whenever possible and despite the amnesia part of terra remembered that always and so she just likes being around her

prior to the game singing was a guilty pleasure. maybe not opera singing but i think celes really just loved to do it, which is why she made a passable maria

i think as a soldier celes was denied things like dresses and bows and just taking pleasure in femininity so secretly she actually had a lot of fun getting dolled up to play maria, what really killed her was the crowds

having survived her own suicide attempt celes is very good at talking people off of their metaphorical ledges. i think in the post-game world where shit is marginally better people would have less of a reason overall to want to die but i also think she’d make it a point to patrol popular jumper spots and look after anyone she came across because she understands that despair so acutely

FAITH:

my girl faith is ARO AS HELL!! it’s possible she’s ace too (maybe lesbian oriented, or just aro and a lesbian) but definitely aro. is there such a thing as a 3-person QP relationship? i’m really into the faith/plastic/icarus dynamic but like no allo

loooooves junk food. faith probably eats like a horse to begin with because of all the energy expends being a parkour superhero but i’m sure she eats a lot of deeply unhealthy shit whenever possible. so when dogen tries to snag her for dinner with like his fancy-pants roast duck she’s like “ugh spare me”

speaking of dogen, i think faith genuinely cares for him and wants him to care for her in a father/daughter kinda way (and i think in his own way he does, or at the very least by the end she’s earned his respect, which is almost better). he’ll never be her dad, or noah, but i feel like everyone else would be like “he’s a creep” and she’d be the one going “yeah okay BUT”

no one knows what happened to faith and cat when she was little except noah and nomad & icarus is the first person she tells after the game is over. i think she’d tell plastic too eventually but icarus is Better At Feelings

doesnt like or plan on having kids but has a secret soft spot for animals, since seeing them is such a rarity in glass. glass doesnt have a huge population of strays but every once in awhile she’ll come across one and she always feeds it if she can

PAPYRUS:

LOVES halloween. we talked about this in stream a bit the other day but he’d loved giving out candy and seeing costumes and putting together his own costume (and sans’s costume lol) - it might even be his favorite holiday

right-handed! i think most monsters are left-handed to reflect how most humans are right-handed, but papyrus is a bit of an odd duck among his kind and also obsessed with humans, so him being right-handed feels Correct

easily just as OP as sans, except duh of course he doesnt ACTUALLY want to hurt you, so that’s why you don’t ever see anything truly scary out of him. he COULD do exactly what sans does, he just doesn’t want to, and he never will

cat person. evidence: dislikes dogs because dogs like bones. sans is a dog person so it only makes sense that papyrus is a cat person. after the game he adopts All The Cats

papyrus is one of those people who is scarily good at video games. like he knows all the ins and outs of different ways to spin tetris blocks and he can calculate the hit point curve of a jrpg character as they level on the fly and he can break basically any game mechanics down to the raw numbers and figure out the best most efficient way of doing things because Its Just Puzzles and thats what my guy does

(send me a character & i’ll list 5 headcanons)

#liz answers asks #bunnikkila #ask memes #ff13 #undertale blogging #ff6 #mirror's edge #long post

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edelwary · 6 years

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when you were first getting into art, what and how did you draw? (like did you just doodle ur masterpieces on pieces of paper and posted-notes or did you have a proper sketchbook) how did you find motivation? bc ive been trying to draw but I always get unmotivated and stop while still wanting to get better just by doing nothing.

REALLY LONG, LOTS OF ADVICES FOR ARTISTS :

TL;DR ; skip to the HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW part bc i have a megaton of shit to say lol + The MOTIVATION part

mmh… I’ll get into details with this one tbh bc it’s a long ass process ahah :

I live by the sea ; when i was youung i used to draw TONS of boat, but like, dollhouse boats, you could see the insides and stuff ; i loved to add tiny details and stuff, and imbricate everything together !

around 8 or 9 yo, i went to the public library with school and discovered the wonderful world of mangas ! I basically… Copy pasted an entire Mermaid Melody tome x)

For about 2 years i alternated between reading mangas and trying to copy them ! Then i just kept drawing in the margins of my schoolwork for about… 5 years ! I have a Fuck Ton of sketchbooks of that time, it was… The start. Lol. Never say it’s bad because it’s never bad, just not there yet !!

Around my 13 yo, i went every saturday, for two years, under a bookstore ; there was a cave, and drawing classes ; that teacher was mean and harsh and stuff, but like… Not really. He would take away my eraser for the class, force me to use pencil, to draw something else (bulky boys instead of magical girls).

I’ve learned a lot, more in terms of How To LEARN to draw than to draw itself, but i still progressed a LOT !!

Then i kept drawing by myself for a year and i really worked hard on it ; about hours a day, trying watercolors and stuff ; i have a real problem with colors in traditionnal art, but i’m much better with lines (i should scan some RAD stuff i made in the weekend, yall ive never done anything this good i stg i dont know why i always forget im so much better on paper)

This gets us to my sweet 16 ; i have to year of advance, bc i got ‘’’promoted’’’ idk how to say it ; anyways, i entered my (current) animation school for the first year at 16; vERY IMPRESSIVE AND TERRIFYING.

And i learned. A fuckmegaton. Of shit there.

Now i’m going for my third year there and i can make photorealistic marmora blades and cyberkpunk decors if i want to and that’s rad, but here is

HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW :

I have one HYPER important advice, and i’m keeping it to heart since i’m like, 11 : Have. Sketchbooks. Please !!! It’s very important. Here’s why :

You keep everything with you in one place. You have 1 sketchbook, it’s basically easy to take every where (a A5, or A4 are pretty easy to carry, i have like, 12 of those, and around 8 of A3)

You keep track of what you’ve done. It’s super important, bc first you can cry of laughter at your old stuff bc its cute but not so good, and second, you can just be like ‘holy mama’ and see how much you’ve improved

It’s very important to be organized. I WORK in art, and trust me, if there’s something that i’ve learned this year through tears and missing files and bugs : Be. Impeccable. Now if it’s for fun, go a little loose, and just have a folder for art on your computer, and a sketchbook, no need to stress, but the better you try to keep a record of where is what, the better you’ll see whats wrong

Notebooks are friends !! You can draw, write, glue stuff, make notes, lists, everything !!! I have my life in those. It’s more important to me than any of my phones.

Be proud of it. Like, not everything, duh ! But try to tell yourself than it’s like a RPG ; even if it’s only 2 xp here and there, one day you’ll beat level 40, and that’s super important : art is. Fuckin. Long.

I cant stress it enough. It’s soooo long !!! SO LONG !! it’s years. It’s like karate and fishing and ANYTHING. To be good at it, it takes time, but it WILL COME if you keep trying. There’s no secret passage.

You’re gonna me it, believe in me who believes in you.

Use. References.

Coming from a little shit who’s got a really good visual memory, that can sound like bs, but i stg everything is always AT LEAST twice as good if you’ve used a visual support.

I’m not saying COPY EVRYTHING (even though thats a good training) I’m saying, if you really want to do that asian tiger, please have at least two or three pictures of it nearby. Take photos of your hands, and stuff !

Make it harder.

No eraser.

Paint.

I draw all my backgrounds on my sketchbook with INDIAN INK; no returns, no refunds.

Ink, Ink, INK !! Don’t allow mistakes.

And if you make mistakes :

New page, restart

It’s okay

It’s for you

I once started back again a whole EXAM bc it was bad, i got one of my best grades

You’ll improve and be more assured if you know you just have to DO IT. Trust me. It’s VISIBLE; if you can erase, you fidget and hesitate and ‘’kbeujebez hahhaaa idkkidsd’’ ; stop ; do it, and if you don’t like it ? Try again, there’s no time limit

Draw as large as you can

There’s no interesting story here, it just helps. Bigger movement of the hand, more place for details, breathing lines

Thin lineart helps

Thinner. Make it even thinner

Break the rules, but not the ones that structure your art

Big lineart ? Why not

Unfinished lines, vaporeous colors ? Pretty

Cubism is actually based on extensive and intense practice of classical art, it’s not wibbly wooblly ; the anatomy is more correct than you think

Structure and composition are important, but so is movement and life ; choose your fighter ; mine is fluidity and fun, i’m like, a rogue/archer in drawing. Some people are dwarf fighter. That’s amazing and great.

Don’t be afraid to do nothing

Pages and pages of my sketchbooks are actually just lance facing right and smiling, you know…

Sometimes it just doesnt work : two ways :

Take a break, Kiki’s delivery service style

Keep trying, break your art until it obeys and comes back

Take breaks. Breath.

Don’t compare. I do it, it doesn’t help at all. You’ll make it ; and if you compare, keep in mind that everyone’s different

I’m not gonna lie, it’s NOT easy, it’s even hard

But I really, really think it’s worth it

MOTIVATION :

My main bitch

I’m always pumped for art because i can LITTERALLY NOT do anything else ; i love reading and writing and stuff but at the end of the day i just want !!! to draw !!!! aaaaaa-

Fall in love with it, and with the possibilities ; i have stories to tell, tell me yours ! Do your best, one day it WILL work

Actual advices :

I have an inspiration blog where i just reblogs stuff i like to draw them later

Find a picture, copy it. Do it again. Change the characters (i have 2 ocs and Lance and Keith as default characters) in the pic.

Like an artstyle ? Break it to its very core, analyse it, copy it, redo it, trace it and ABSORB it. Don’t copy/past, LEARN from your heroes.

Do what you like. I have 86578 pieces of voltron, this is not a coincidence. I have ENDLESS ideas for this show, wtf.

Try new things. Buy indian ink im begging you. It’s so cool.

Have a game with yourself, or a challenge. STICK TO IT.

Study. When you’re bored, usually it’s because you’re stagnating. Make it harder or do hands until you cry.

Love your backgrounds; make backgrounds, study trees, and tokyo streets, and venice’s bridges. Decor is just as cool as characters, if not more

Mess a little with everything. My roomate more than one found me stained from head to toes trying to DO STUFF

Draw outfits. Draw what you want but can’t afford

MAKE YOUR LIFE A COMIC. Remember those sketchbooks ? Make a comic a week/month/every full moon, whatever, and draw your life (mine’s the roomates au lol)

Prompts blogs are cool too

Make fanart of a fic you liked ; you have the characters and the pose already, you just have to illustrate ; double bonus, you probably will make a writer’s day, if not year !

That little movie that plays when you listen to your favorite song ? DRAW IT

Your favorite scene in your favorite movie ? Redraw each shot. On post it. Plus it looks awesome afterwards to have the infamous TREX scene of Jurassic Parks in post it

Get bored. That’s inevitable. Dance, scream, get back to it. Walk, draw everything you see.

Make a paper google map street view : Take a walk : every 50 meters, draw what is in front of you.

Snapchats your friends. Draw their snapchats when they answer

Draw maps. Invent places. Invent bikes, and hovercrafts, and monsters. Make your everyday inventory. Make your life a video game, and do the concept arts of it.

FETCH your inspiration. I have approx. 20 artbooks, full of drawings and concept arts of my fave movies/games ; take what you like and add it to the story you have since you’re 8. We all have one.

Ask for it ; your sis, your mom, me even ! If you dont have ideas, someone will have them.

WELL i’m gonna stop there, even though i got like, 9864567 more to say, but with this you should be fine ! Anon, i’m rooting for you ! we all start somewhere, just hold on!!!!

#Anon you'll do it !!!!!!!!!!#asked #artist advice #art #i put my heart in this omg #it's 1.5 K WORDS #wtf #but yeah #you just gotta do shit and mess around

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