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marisandini-chu-blog · 3 years

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How Shadow and Bones Differentiate Villain and Anti-Hero

Alright, first I need to claim the fact that I love dark, edgy, but misunderstood bad boy in stories with the potential of epic redemption. Loki from Marvel. Jason Todd from DC. Captain Hook from Once Upon a Time. Zuko from AtLA. You name them, I simp them.

So when I watched this new show on Netflix and shown a tall, handsome man in dark clothing, both respected and feared for his power. I feel... nothing.

WHICH IS WEIRD! Like... he’s obviously my type. Complete with the sad backstory and vicious streak. So I kept wondering why I wasn’t enamored by the Darkling, Alexander Kirigan. I wasn’t surprised he was the main villain, I even expected it. But I usually at least have a bit of sympathy for them. This OOC behavior of mine made me introspect myself and the show, trying to find out which part gave me the red flags before Mother Darkling decides to pop the chosen one out halfway in the season.

That’s when it hit me; there were red flags! The show had been subtly trying to tell us Kirigan is a manipulative boyfriend not just by great acting and good directing, but by comparing him with the actual anti-hero of the story who I actually love; Kaz Brekker.

Here’s the list of signs you might not notice of why Kirigan is meant to be a Villain instead of an Anti-Hero.

1. The Eyes

"The eyes are the window to the soul" is a common saying and and the key to good acting for any good show. Eyes tell us a lot about what a person’s character is like and SaB showed us the difference of a sincere man and a man with a hidden agenda.

Look at him! Look at that little smirk. Look at the gaze. That's the look you find when someone's evil little plan is finally coming together. Not one awed by the power or by Alina. A blatant sus move is what I'm saying. Congrat, first flag planted.

Sure he could still fall in love with Alina, but that doesn't stop his agenda either. All it does is potentially create conflict for him to pick either his plan for revenge or life with Alina.

In comparison, look at Kaz when he said this to Inej; "She isn't like you, no one is." Straightforward eyes. Serious grim. No nonsense tone. Inej is one of the most talented and terrifying rogue-assassin and Kaz just blatantly said that he kept her from 'slavery' because of who she is, not what she's capable of. Like... the man has no shame being known to love her while still trying to be professional (or as professional a thief can be). I can respect that.

This is the eye of a man who would abandon everything to make sure she comes out alright in the end. Do not argue with me on this!

2. Leverage and Status

The moment Alina steps into the Little Palace she was treated like a princess. A palace, by the way, that’s managed by the Darkling. She gets favorable treatment; from the food, Zoya displaced when she fought Alina, a horseback ride just the two of them, asking her to call by his name to make them familiar, a black uniform that might as well be claiming???

Dude is desperate is what I’m saying.

Sure, this could all be romantic gestures. There’s the problem that Kirigan is superior in status and name, powerful Grisha, and has a vested interest in her power. Pursuing romance while Kirigan has the ability to make her life heaven or hell with a snap of his finger made every single decision be seen with wariness.

"Beware of powerful men," Genya couldn't put it any better.

Had they pursued romance after they destroy the fold, cementing Alina’s position as a saint more. Then I might have let go of that wariness.

I’m only proven correct when the moment Alina turned away from him, Kirigan made another leverage by (spoiler!) putting an antler to her collarbone... eeeewwww much?!

That’s how desperate the Darkling is to be in control of a person and a situation.

And when no letter came for Alina? That a big red flag because who else in this castle can control the coming of going of letter with the Savior. HMMMMMMMMMMM.....

Then there’s Kaz. My man. There’s no competition. This guy held no leverage on my dear Inej. When she almost decided to leave, Kaz didn't force or convince her to stay but he ask her. Doesn't remind her of her debt whether monetary or life debt to him. In fact, this guy needs money for revenge but instead mortgage his main source of income for her freedom.

HE POSTPONED HIS LIFE GOAL TO FREE HER FROM DEBT ASJHAKFSDJGLDFJ!!!

What more do I need to say?

3. Sympathy Card

This is the type of point you want to watch out from your partners, ladies, gents, and others. The sympathy card is the way to go when anyone wants to reach out to you so you can take care of them before they abuse or gaslight you.

While it’s good to share trauma and eased the burden, sometimes it's healthy to ask yourself whether the person can take advantage of you and to verify whether they lie to you or not.

When Kirigan shared about his past as a sympathetic boy with his secluded fountain and coin. Everything about that scene rang warning bells for me... the part he had requested her to use his color... requesting to horse ride with just them two... sharing sob story that may encourage Alina to help him...

Kudos to Alina to see through the fact she's seen as a means to an end.

It was only when Kirigan showed righteous anger and frustration of a war that's killing his people did Alina finally opened her heart to him.

Kaz however doesn't use the sympathy card. Heck, the man likes to believe he shed away any weakness and threw it in the harbor where it belongs. Kaz hates weaknesses. And garnering sympathy is an admission of weakness for him.

We still know there's a tragic backstory as any decent anti-hero would have... but by not sharing that, this implies that Inej and Jesper stayed because of who he is, and not because of who he was or how he came to be. They don't need a sob story to stay together and that showed a stronger bond between them.

4. Friends

To be frank, I find this the most hilarious because this point is the one that convinced me that Kirigan was secretly an evil bastard.

He doesn’t have any friends!!!

Like... dude had a literal witch army, a wife once, a fuck buddy, and a girlfriend but there wasn’t a single moment in the show where someone, outside of Alina and superior, to speak casually to him.

You’re telling me this person... the most powerful and influential Grisha in the East Ravka, charming as hell, handsome as fuck, and yet he doesn’t have friends?!

“I’ve buried good soldiers... friends...” Get the fuck out of here! WHAT FRIENDS?!?! Maybe if you get off your little power trip from your self-made pedestal, you can actually be less of an asshole and make one.

Sure he excused himself by blaming his ‘ancestor’ for being a shadow summoner. I can see how the fear makes it hard for him to get close to anybody. But all the other characters who are part of his army only ever shown to speak with him respectfully, and the royalty even commend him. No one disrespected him even openly and you’re telling me he doesn’t have one friend amidst all these people?!

In comparison, look at Kaz. He’s brash, crude, and unapologetic. He held true to his moniker ‘Bastard of the Barrel’ and yet this ass has friends. They show Jesper joking with Kaz, and Kaz has shown to banter with him back as well as tolerating his gambling addiction when it could have jeopardized the Job. Inej was shown to actually argue and have disagreement with Kaz when he’s technically her boss. Can you imagine the Darkling doing that? CAN YOU?!

No. Because he's a pretentious ass. That's why.

This is a great example of the use “show not tell” of how Kaz despite his obvious edges has a soft spot shown through his relationship with Inej and Jesper, who have a friendly dynamic. I can attest that while Kaz didn’t create a good first impression, I love Jesper and Inej (they are precious!) so much that I project it to Kaz in extension.

On the other hand, Kirigan’s goodwill had only ever been told by outsiders or himself. None from his inner circle (which he doesn’t have!) other than his mother, who ended up outing him instead.

So I applaud the writers and showrunners of SaB to actually have subtext signs of a manipulative bastard. The Duckling is a good villain character that's complex but unredeemable. Sometimes, you just have a good ol' charming villain you can't redeem and that's okay.

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the-silentium · 4 years

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Quits

Masterlist

Pairing: Five Hargreeves x Reader

Words: 2200 words

Warnings: TUA season 1 and 2 spoilers, violence, blood, swearing.

Requested by: Anon!

Hi!! Can i get a five x reader where the reader gets shot or stabbed or something but doesnt tell anyone and ends up passing out? Thanks!!

A/N: I’m back at my requests! Thank you Anon for this sweet lil’ idea and I hope it lives up to your expectations as it does with mine ❤ Requests are still open!

You remember a time when you took pride in your capacity to make the right choice at the right time. When school asked you what you wanted to do in life, you chose the right one from the start unlike the majority of your friends who had to change classes multiple times and were now a happy veterinarian. When life put on your path the incarnation of your perfect partner, you decided to take it slow to see where it went. Fortunately for you, you quickly saw through his facade and kicked him out before he could create more permanent damage to your heart.

Your life was full of important decisions that were though at the time. Sometimes you had to take some days to think about it when other times it took you hours. They were all risky shots that could end up badly for you in the end so you liked to take your time to think about it.

This is why when Five Hargreeves, your childhood closest friend, knocked at your door one day and asked for your help to stop the fast-arriving apocalypse, you didn't think twice and immediately accepted. How could you make the bad choice by helping him save the world? If he failed you would die, he would die, everyone would die and this is obviously the bad end of the story, right?

Well, as of right now, you were starting to doubt it. After failing to stop 2019's apocalypse and after Five had time-traveled every living Hargreeves plus yourself in the 1960s, you found yourself in two precarious situations: one, you were back in your 13-year-old self and two, you were not fighting two crazy hard-ass Commissioners, but three crazy hard-ass IKEA mafioso!

It was a miracle that you survived the raid on the Hargreeves Mansion unscathed. You had thanked your luck for allowing you to live another day, although you regret ever doing so. Clearly, you had jinxed yourself, for surviving the Swedes ambush at the Mexican consulate wasn't as painless as the raid.

A very well-sharpened knife had managed to pierce your skin, getting in your abdomen all the way to the hilt before you managed to kick the white-haired man down a nice flight of stairs. Your medical instinct pushed you to hastily insert some absorbent tissue into your wound to control the bleed and allow you to check it later.

Sadly, one thing led to another and you were now sitting with all six Hargreeves who were currently trying to formulate a plan of some sort while Diego was focussed on his JFK conspiracy and you were literally bleeding out.

The once pristine washcloth you had stolen in the kitchen was completely soaked, staining your blue shirt with dark red spots. Speaking of spots, hundreds of tiny black ones were now dancing in your line of sight like dark fireflies.

"Has anyone here done anything to screw up the timeline?"

You lifted your hand hoping to get the attention of the others, obviously working when Luther asked what you'd done.

"Anything yet, but would it screw the timeline if I died here?"

You saw Five frowns in confusion, his mouth opening on a question before yelling your name when you couldn't hold yourself up anymore and fell to the ground. Strong arms lifted you from the floor and you landed on a comfy cloud. You smiled in contentment, it has been a while since you had a proper night of sleep. This cloud will be perfect for a nap.

Tiny slaps on your left cheek forced your eyes to open and meet a concerned blue gaze.

"So pretty." You mumbled, still focussing on the blue eyes frantically scanning your face.

Oh did I mentioned earlier that you had a crush on Five? Because you do and it is not small if after 15 years your heart still accelerates when you merely meet his gaze.

"Don't sleep okay? Keep your eyes open!" You laughed at his command, it is the same thing you told him the day he lost consciousness at Leonard's cabin. You had a snarky remark at the tip of your tongue but it died on your lips when darkness forced its way upon you.

………………………

Even before your mind was operational enough to create thoughts, your brain was already running full speed and relentlessly reminded you that your abdomen was on fire. The pain was a great ally into your mission to wake up and open your eyes. Maybe you would be able to ask for some painkillers.

The harsh neon light shining over your head made you tear up the second your eyes opened to assess your environment. You tried again, slower this time, and found yourself confused by your surroundings.

Many times in your childhood you had passed time in this room, planning pranks, doing homework, reading, or just hanging out. Nothing had changed excepted the walls that were now covered in equations and names.

Groggily, you attempted to seat up, your abdominal muscles screamed in agony at your movements forcing you to stay on your back. The groan that erupted from your throat alarmed a passer-by who raced to the door, opening it so fast that it collided with the wall.

"She's awake!" Klaus shouted in the corridor when he saw your wide-open eyes. He only had time to put a foot into the bedroom that a blue light appeared out of nowhere announcing Five's arrival. Your heart was beating too quickly by the time Five had pushed Klaus out of his room and slammed the door shut behind him.

“What were you thinking?!” Five's anger caused you to frown. What did you do? You searched your mind for an answer and quickly found one in the vivid memory of a knife diving into your flesh.

You opened your mouth to talk your mind but nothing came out of the desert that was your throat. Noticing your problem, Five caught a water bottle from his nightstand, cautiously brought it to your lips, and let you drink small sips of the freshwater. Satisfied, you coughed once to prepare your throat.

“Now you know how it felt so we are quits.” You answered, referring to the time in Leonard’s cabin where you felt like the world had stopped when Five lost consciousness. You took care of him as best as you could despite your field of expertise being animals you had a basic understanding of the human anatomy, so with your trembling hands covered in his blood while desperately trying to not notice how much there was, you worked as effectively as you could to keep the love of your life alive.

"This is not a game! You could have died!" You would have believed his angry eyes if only his hands weren't shaking so much. You were friend with Five for long enough to know how to read his temper and now, he was scared.

"But I didn't." You tried to calm him down with your calm voice. You remember jumping at his neck the second he woke up that time he passed out, why couldn't he do the same instead of yelling at you?

You watched him open his mouth a couple of times before closing it, clearly thinking through what he was going to say. When he finally chose, his voice was barely audible. "Selfish."

You blinked in confusion at his statement. "Me? Selfish?" With each word now, your voice was raising until you reached the point where you were yelling at the blue-eyed 30 years old man. "Everything I did was to save the damn world from the apocalypse and you call me selfish?! I took a fucking knife to the gut and dealt with it for the sake of the world and you call me self-"

"I wasn't talking about you." Now this stopped you good. You frowned in confusion, not seeing where he was going. "I was talking about me."

Your head tilted to the side, searching your brain as to why Five would call himself selfish. All he did was for his family, he never acted for himself, so why?

"I almost let everything down to make sure you made it back alive. I almost let the world end for you because I can't imagine living another 45 years where you're not there." His words were soft, a tone that you weren't aware was used exclusively around you. His gaze fled yours, switching between the scribbles on the walls and the foot of the bed.

Color rushed to your face for his words definitely sounded like a confession to your ears. Your childhood self had waited for so long to hear something of the type, so long that you thought the friendzone was the ultimate area that you would be welcome in. You accepted that your feelings were strong enough to be pleased by his happiness even with someone else.

A smile formed on your lips causing Five's heart to miss a beat in its rhythmic pumping. "I-"

"Guys they are doing it!" Klaus' loud voice on the other side of the door cut you off.

"Doing what?" Allison had joined her brother at the door, confused of his antics.

"Admitting their undying love for each other!" At this point Five had opened the door swiftly, his murderous gaze fell on his siblings, daring them to say something more. It was at this moment that Klaus realized how scary his brother was in reality, he wasn't the little Number Five anymore, but a grown-up man who could easily murder him in a thousand ways possible.

"Oh heck no!" The words fell off your mouth against your will, the embarrassing situation making you nervous so your brain tried to defuse the situation by stating the opposite of what Klaus wanted. From your point of view, you totally missed the way Five's eyes lost their deadly rage, instead showing his pain at your words. He was quick to hide his feelings once more, but his siblings had enough time to acknowledge his true emotion.

Slapping Klaus behind the head, Allison got a hold of his shirt and pulled him away to let the two of you clear this out. Everyone knew you two were pinning each other when you were younger. Even when fighting the two apocalypses! It was clear as day for the rest of the family, however, it wasn't the case for the both of you.

The door slammed back in place once more making you jump and hiss in pain when your abdominal muscles contracted. In your field of vision, you noted that Five had tensed before closing his hands in tight fists and made his way to his desk, the only place in the room you couldn't see because of your incapacity to turn around.

You knew what you said must have hurt him, it clearly seemed like you had rejected him. Stupid defense method.

"Five?" No answer was given, his heavy breathing being the only sound resonating in the room. "I didn't mean that." A scoff fell off his lips.

"You think I'll believe that?" The venom in his voice told you just how much you had hurt him, squeezing your heart in shame.

"When you disappeared 15 years ago I developed a system to protect myself from new heartbreaks. It hurt way less to force myself to believe that my feelings for you were nonexistent than acknowledge them and continue living without you, Five." Water appeared in your eyes, pooled down your cheeks, and soaked your new shirt. "I was so used to deny my feelings that-" Your voice broke when a sob forced its way out of you.

Hands found your cheeks, drying the wet trails before pulling you into a firm chest. You managed to slip your hands around his waist and cried for as long as needed. The exhaustion of the last endless days caught up to you along with the fact that the subject of your love was very well alive and here to stay, fueling the flow of tears falling down your eyes.

"I really didn't mean it." You managed to croak out between sobs.

One of Five's hand went to your hair, stroking your head tenderly. "I know." Your grip onto his shirt tightened when a kiss landed on the top of your head.

Slowly, he pulled away to lay you back down onto his bed and snuggled to your side when your anxious eyes found his. One of his arms went under your head while the other took care to not accidentally touch the general area surrounding your wound when snaking around your waist to keep you as close to him as possible.

His body heat was very much welcome, you snuggled your way into the crook of his neck in search of comfort.

"Rest. I'll be there when you wake up." He whispered into your hair when his button-down crumpled in your hands.

You sighed, allowing yourself to relax in his embrace. "I love you Five." You had to get it out before you let yourself fall asleep for you were scared that later would be too late.

"I love you too." Delicate patterns were traced by his skilled fingers onto the bare skin of your waist making you shiver. Your heartbeat accelerated at his chuckle before stabilizing when you fell into a peaceful slumber.

#five hargreeves #five hargreeves x reader #number five #the boy #tua s1 #tua s2 #the umbrella academy #my fic #the swedes #fluff

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bunchofstraydogs · 3 years

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You asked for it :> So may I request the rest of BSD playing Genshin? 😘🥰

Darling, since I can't write that many characters in one go, I thought I should give you something special. I present... 💫 women 💫

Women of BSD as Genshin Impact players

tw: you're in bsd fandom, you know all the tw there are by now

Kyouka Izumi- Assasin in the streets, babysitter in the... Genshin Impact

Kyouka is that cute, stubborn kid that overfixates on things. Atsushi is things. Look, we all know Kyo-chan is mad intelligent and talented and it shows in her game play. Right off the bat she got the sense of the gameplay of every type of character and decided what works best for her. She knows what type of team she's going for and knows how to manage her materials wisely.

When she plays alone, Kyouka works towards bettering her characters and pushing through the storyline. Her favourite way to play the game is with Atsushi, whether alone or in co-op with others. Playing with Jinko is a huge win-win situation for her - she helps him beat up whatever he needs to take down and complete puzzles, he gives her praises and gratitude. And materials, but seldom does she take them.

Her main job, though, is to protect Atsushi and his world from the otherworldly evil known as the suicidal maniac, Dazai Osamu. She's fairly successful.

Main Team: MC, Klee, Keqing, Rosaria

Sub Team: MC, Qiqi, Fischl, Hu Tao

Mains MC, both for her flexibility with elements and because she likes being the little sister to Atsushi's male MC.

Yosano Akiko- retired nurse, now a terrorist

Did you really think she'd stay a healer without having the sadistic satisfaction of hurting people in grotesque ways? Nay. She doesn't have a single healer on team. She either has a teammate who's a healer like Haruno, or she wastes abundance of food until she can teleport to a statue of the seven.

Her game play is on crack, basically. She has several energy spurs, sometimes several times a day, where she rages through the game, before losing interest and going shopping. It's very possible with her that days can pass before she feels like playing again. Then she binges the game for hours and repeat.

When i say she acts like on crack i mean it. She has rage in her veins instead of blood. She tanks her characters and goes out looking for fights with worst possible opponents. Hell, she'll under equip her party just to see how many mofos can she take down in weak state. Spoilers, a fair few. She does die quite a bit, and is almost always out of food, but she's just as stubborn as she's crazy. Those two thing correlate probably. Which is why she made Azdaha her bitch. Her party consists either of strong, hot milfs women like herself, or twinks. You won't see someone like Childe disrespecting her vibe.

Main Team: Beido, Venti, Hu Tao, Rozaria

Sub Team: Lisa, Yanfei, Ningguang, Xingqiu

Beido and Lisa main. Bad bitches only.

Naomi Tanizaki- the fangirl player

She basically collects the cutest characters possible.. That's how she chooses her characters, based on cuteness. She went for the hot ones first to pull her brother but she got jealous and changed her tactic. You know she's spending her money on character skins and certain banners. She's insanely lucky tho?? She got Qiqi on the standard banner as her first 5*, pulled Klee on her banner in little over four 10 pulles and got Diona eventually anyway. Baraba and Xiangling were free and she mained Xiangling untill Klee rolled in. She spent some money on Venti and was already in pity when Ganyu came around. She's fully ready to whale for Kokomi though.

Now i know i said she's incredibly lucky, right? Yeahh that luck has to turn against something to keep the balance and well... she's still crying over Chongyun.

She usually co-ops with her brother, it's a daily ritual. Loves co oping with everyone though, mostly Haruno, Atsushi and Kyouka. She made online friends as well. Actually, there is one person she co ops with almost as much as she does with her brother. IchiGawa is her Genshin bestie and they talk about their crushes and infatuations besides the game itself. Her friend is the only secret she keeps from her brother.

Main Team: Klee, Diona, Venti, Barbara

Sub Team: Razor, Xiangling, Xingqiu, Qiqi

A Klee main.

Haruno Kirako- the healer

Literal angel. You need her, i need her, ADA needs her, the president needs her, just... yes. Her whole team consists of support- healers and crowd control characters. She was a f2p at first, but realised she earns her own money and can spend it however she wishes and she chose the monthly cards.

She's a necessity, point blank. She can get intimidated by new foe at first, but when backed up by her friends, she becomes determined and flexible. Pays good attention to her teammates, most importantly, their health bars, and acts accordingly.

The only reason most of them made it as far as they have, being as reckless as they are.

Main Team: Albedo, Barbara, Jean, Venti

Sub Team: Qiqi, Noel, Jean, Xinyan

Mains Albedo and Barbara

Fan fact: She's very fascinated infatuated with Albedo!! He's even her home screen and has posters and key chain of him.

Gin Akutagawa- that cottagecore assassin

You may be wondering what that could even mean. Let me tell you, she brought Animal Crossing to Genshin Impact. Sure she takes care of her characters and they're pretty powerful, but she kicks ass in real life as well. The game is her little getaway, especially since Serenity pot has been introduced. She's been making away her home for her and her brother characters. You can see her chop wood, collect materials, taking pictures with her friends and her brother, sometimes of pretty scenery and cute moments. A very wholesome player.

She's the type to help her friends explore their world and help them find oculi, open chests, shrines, collect flowers, mine... She's very patient, but if she sees her co-op teammates struggle with something, she'll jump in to help do it herself untill told to back off. In which case she will listen and silently give her support, usually with the cheering stickers in the chat.

She's f2p! Sure, she could get the monthly card at least, as Ryunosuke told her, but she really wants to enjoy the game on her own terms and have what she does through her own effort and hard work. It just feels satisfying to her and more personal.

Main Team: Jean, Ayaka, Diluc, Barbara

Sub Team: Doesn't have one! She just changes characters if certain elements are needed.

Jean main!! She admirers the relationship her and Barbara have. While she's the younger of the two, she's taken the mantle of the older sibling, in a way, and is looking after her reckless as heck brother and cares for him like Jean does for Barbara. Jean is also a wonderful person in her eyes and Gin harbours great respect for the blonde.

Higuchi Ichiyo- IchiGawa 🤡

I love Higuchi so much, but my girl is a mess and a half. Help her, please. No, really, she needs help. She's been over compensating for not being dramatic and eye catching in the battlefield, and has now found a new way to prove herself to her Akutagawa-san. Problem is, as soon as she sees a potentially powerful character, she has to get them and boost them to the havens... yeahh, good thing you can't do loans in the game, otherwise she'd have sharks on her ass for having a bill as dramatic and eye catching as Tsunade's from Naruto. Our girl out there turning heads for wrong reasons. She's definitely spent her pay checks on the game "oh no no, i just buy the monthly subscription, ehe" ehe my ass, you bankrupt bitch. Baal is coming and she's looking to sell a kidney. No, it's not her own and no, it doesn't have anything to do with the game. It's a mission, for God's sake.

But hey, the game is a good investment for her! She even made a friend, one that totally understands her how she feels!! They're very alike as well, ready to do anything for the person they love. The two talk about love a lot and have bonded over it. Higuchi is actually a jealous and a protective type of person, so she hides her friend from Gin and Tachihara like snake hides it's legs. If only they knew 🤡. But it's better this way as they both have a certain sense of normalcy and familiarity they were missing in their daily lives. (Higuchi and Naomi meeting scenario when?)

Main Team: Xiao, Fischl, Xingqiu, Diluc

Sub Team: Baal (soon?), Venti, Ganyu, Zhongli

She mains Xiao because he reminds her of Akutagawa-san and yes, she uses characters from her sub team when playing with others.

Fan Fact: when she was asked why her username is IchiGawa, she said she's like a river 🤡 No, it does absolutely not stand for Ichiyo Akutagawa.

Ozaki Kouyo- the husbando and loli collector

Don't get the wrong idea when i said loli collector. She just needs to adopt them and look after them. She also enjoys watching her precious babies kick ass like her Kyouka. But that's a two way sword, because she gets angry when they die. Savage.

And yeahh, the real reason she's playing the game... Mr Zhongli. She switches often between eng and jpn audios because she can't decide which sounds sexier. Also, Mr Diluc? Yes, she would like to be served one sex on the beach please and thank you! Ah, Mr Kaeya, a perfect window of opportunity, yes.

She has a huge spot for the teenager group as well. Razor, Bennett, Fishl, Xiangling, Xingqiu and Chongyun are also her kids. She just finds them very precious (don't we all?).

Main Team: Zhongli, Kaeya, Bennett, Diluc

Sub Team: Diona, Klee, Qiqi, Sayu

A Zhongli and Diluc main.

Bonus:

Elise- the evil lackadaisical player

Mori found out about the game from Higuchi and Tachihara and introduced it to Elise, telling her she should make a team of sweet little girls like herself and have fun going on adventures around Teyvat. In response, Elise made a team that, not only does it not have a single child in it, but is using it to gaslight and bully Rintarou.

"Why aren't you smart and inventive like Albedo?"

"Why aren't you as passionate and persistent as Sucrose?"

"Look how capable, loved and admired Ningguang is. You could never."

"I wish i had someone as strong, caring, handsome and rich like Childe looking after me. He would treat me like a real princess. "

Mori has been crying rivers ever since.

Thing is, Elise isn't even that interest in the story. Actually, she couldn't care less. Some characters are interesting to her and she likes the graphics, but other than that, she's mostly playing the game to torture the greasy doctor (as she should).

Main Team: Albedo, Sucrose, Ningguang, Childe

Sub Team: doesn't have one

Doesn't have a main either, she plays whoever she feels like playing.

I wanted to add Lucy too, but my mind wasn't cooperating ;-; Sorry about that. I do hope you liked this, Eli 💛

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #kyoka izumi #haruno kirako #higuchi ichiyo #ozaki kouyou #bsd elise #tanizaki naomi

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nose-bandaid · 3 years

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DK (Seokmin) x (gender neutral) Reader | college AU fluff | 4.2k words

synopsis: seokmin first captured your attention with his smile, and you were more than enthralled. then you captured HIS attention by utterly destroying his favourite scarf and then fleeing the scene (oops). but surely you can fix this before things get awkward, right?

a/n: it ended up more platonic than it did romantic but oh well,,, this is a very specific plot i apologize LOL

taglist: @elcie-chxn @woozisnoots (hi alex this is the seokmin fic you asked me to tag you in like MONTHS ago sksfhdjkjdsf) [send and ask or dm if you ever wanna be tagged in my works!]

=====

You've always called him the scarf boy. On alternating days, it was the sunshine(y) boy.

The first day you met him was actually about a week into the semester, when you glanced over to your left and saw him sitting on the other side of the lecture hall. Nothing out of the ordinary. Normally, you would’ve just looked away and carried on with your life. It’s not unusual for your eyes to wander around as you zoned in and out of the professor’s speech. That's what you get for always staying up late the night before.

But on that day, you found your eyes fixated on the boy for the next few minutes, and you watched as he whispered something to his friend. It must’ve been something funny because soon they were both giggling like fools and he smiled from ear to ear.

And it was that smile that captivated you because you don't think you've ever seen such a bright smile before.

His face was familiar. Surely you've seen him many, many times before today, you thought. And yet you couldn't place a name on the classmate.

You brought your attention back to the lecture for a brief second and then looked at your friend, Seungkwan, who sat to your left. You gently nudged him with your elbow and he spared a glance your way before going back to his notes. You nudged him again, this time a little harder.

“Hm?” He still didn’t look up from his notebook, but you knew you had his attention now.

“Do you know who that guy is?” You gestured with your head in the smiley boy’s direction, and Seungkwan finally looked up to follow your gaze.

“Oh, you mean the literal ball of sunshine that doesn't know how to shut up?” He replied in one breath.

“Huh?”

"I said that as a good thing, by the way. Or, for the most part. His name is Lee Seokmin, everyone on campus calls him a happy virus 'cause he keeps on smiling." He paused to scribble something down.

It was probably something important and you should've written it as well, but you could tell he had more to say. You patiently waited.

"I've heard that he's in the theatre club, but I'm not too sure. He's Soonyoung's friend, but not really mine."

"So he's a theatre kid, huh." You echoed quietly and Seungkwan quirked an eyebrow.

"Why are you asking? Also, I'm not lending my notes, it's your problem for not paying attention."

"I was just wondering." You answered a little too quickly but tried to divert the attention elsewhere by busying yourself with re-organizing your own notes. "And if you lend me notes, I'll bring snacks for you tomorrow." You added quietly when the professor glanced your way after shushing Seokmin and his friend.

"Deal." You heard him whisper back after a minute and his notebook slid into your vision.

=====

A few days later, you went to class early so that you could finish up a small assignment to prepare for the lesson. Once again, nothing out of the ordinary.

You sat in your usual spot — not too far in the back, but also not too close to the front. Just enough for you to see the board and sneakily hold conversations without really being noticed.

There weren’t any assigned seats, but by now, it was a convention that everyone sat in the same spot every day. The spot beside yours was always saved for Seungkwan, and the spot beside his was saved for that one kid who only showed up once a month.

You were finishing up the last few pages when a loud “HELLO” echoed in the hall and you whipped your head towards the doorway.

It was that boy — Seokmin — dressed in a soft yellow hoodie, hair slightly ruffled as if he hadn’t bothered to fix it after waking up. Around his neck was the red knitted scarf he always wore the moment the weather grew cold. (Though you swore you've seen him wear it in the middle of the sweltering summer). He smiled widely, waving to the half-empty hall and then to the professor who simply chuckled at his entrance. That smile stayed on his face the entire time he made his way to his seat.

From then on, you began to understand why people called him a happy virus.

The next day, you found yourself going to class early again, this time, because you honestly didn’t have anything better to do. Besides, arriving at a good time always made you comfortable. The moment the clock struck 8:46, the same boy appeared.

"HELLO!~"

This time, it was sung out in a (very beautiful) falsetto, and you wondered how it was even possible for him to be this exuberant so early in the morning. Waking up was always a struggle on your part.

Just as quickly as the show started, the boy shut himself up after receiving a few tired "hellos" from his classmates and took a seat.

The day went by accordingly.

Since you were little, you've always been told that something needs to be repeated at least three times for it to be considered a pattern. So you decided to go to class early just one more time. You told yourself it's so that you could see you were missing out on things. In case coming to class just in time was a bad habit. A lousy excuse, really.

You knew that you just wanted to see Seokmin again.

Sure enough — it was a Thursday that day — he came in, this time in a navy blue cardigan, but still with the same red scarf. The "hello" today was a little more subdued and based on the package he had in his hands, you guessed he had stayed up all night practicing his lines. When his greeting was met with unusual silence you looked around to see that everyone was far more focused on the upcoming test than the boy at the door. So you mustered up the courage to be the one greeting him that day and he immediately perked up, sending you an appreciative smile. His eyes remained brighter as he walked over to his seat.

You decided to come to class early every day after that.

=====

As the seasons changed, so did your classes, and you were more than happy to realize that you and Seokmin shared not just one, but two classes this semester.

Bouncing on your toes a little bit, you silently willed for the people in front of you to hurry the heck up. The narrow stairwell did no good for the congestion of students trying to get by.

You glanced at your phone again to see that class was starting in just 3 minutes and grimaced at your predicament. You knew your professor loved starting lectures right on the clock, so you were already cutting it pretty close when you agreed to help someone with their spilled drinks before you got here. But now... did these students really have to carry their gigantic project up the stairs?

You had hoped that maybe they would step aside and let you scurry your way up to the second floor — that was literally all you needed for them. However, they seemed to be far too engrossed with the fact that one of the components was coming apart in the stuffy stairwell and you let out a sigh, backing out the door.

If they won't take the elevator then you supposed you will instead.

Thankfully, the usually crowded elevator was fairly empty, and you managed to score one all to yourself. That was a win for you if only everything else had gone as smoothly as that. Your day had only started and circumstances have suggested that it wasn't going to be the best ones out there.

Perhaps, it was also partly your fault for blasting music through your headphones in the morning. That caused you to get a little lost in your thoughts on the way here, it also caused you to bump into a few unsuspecting people. Or perhaps, it was because you decided that it was a good idea to check your phone after receiving a text to hurry to class when the elevator door was closing.

But you like to think that it was maybe also his fault for stuffing his face with a bagel at 8 am in the morning, rendering him unable to clearly shout out at you to keep the elevator door open.

You looked up at the strangled noise and saw Seokmin barrelling towards you, his one free hand wildly waving at you to do something about the situation. You, just as frantic as the boy was, rushed to smash the "open" button to no avail as the door continued to close with every step he took.

He made it, much to your relief, tumbling into the lift and almost spilling his coffee onto you (another drink disaster would've ruined your day completely). You didn't have much time to congratulate him for his feat, however, because you both watched in horror as his iconic knitted red scarf — caught in between the doors of the elevator — began to tear and unravel itself.

Seokmin frantically lifted the scarf over his head and tried to pull it out of the elevator's grip while you reached down and grabbed it in an attempt to help. But all efforts were futile when the last stitch came apart, and he was left with only a fraction of what used to be his favourite red scarf. Your stomach twisted itself when you looked up and saw the distress in his eyes, his teeth biting down on his lip as if he was contemplating the best way to curse you out.

He was an actor though, and you could tell he was putting up a facade to hide how upset he actually was. His eyes wavered as he stared at the scarf, now reduced to a mess of yarn and his lips tugged into a weary smile.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to close the door on you it was an accident." You blurted out.

Seokmin didn't answer, but the elevator door dinged open as your phone buzzed with its second alarm of the day. Class was starting.

Your hand slipped into your pocket to turn off the alarm and you looked back at Seokmin, eyes begging for forgiveness. "Look, let's meet up again sometime later so I can make it up to you, okay? I promise that I'll fix this."

And with that, you sprinted away from the scene, leaving the poor boy alone with his destroyed scarf.

=====

"Let me get this straight — the elevator door closed too soon and Seokmin's scarf got caught and tore apart and now you're worried that he hates you 'cause you think the scarf is really important to him?"

You nodded.

Seungkwan sighed and rubbed his forehead, trying to return to his notes. "This reads like a fanfic someone wrote at 5 am."

"It what." You blinked and he dismissed the question.

"Nothing, nothing. Did you get his number? Any way to contact him?"

You gave him a sheepish look. "I forgot to ask, I kinda ran away."

"You ran away?"

"It was an accident okay! I was nervous. But we have a lecture with him tomorrow morning, right? I could just talk to him then."

Seungkwan raised an eyebrow. "And you'll be able to muster up the courage by tomorrow? It took you 10 minutes to even tell me what happened, what do you plan to do?"

You bit your lip and stared at the forgotten work on your laptop. "Good question, I have no idea how to make up for it. Scrap talking to him tomorrow."

You both settled into silence as Seungkwan continued on with his notes and you leaned back in your chair. All sorts of ideas ran through your mind, but not of them seemed like the right one.

Then it hit you.

"That's it!" You gasp and sat straight up again, accidentally startling Seungkwan who whined about his smudged diagram. "I'll buy him another scarf, the exact same one."

"That's a good idea." He hummed. "But how will you know which one to buy?"

"I was hoping you'd have his socials? We could do some classic investigating." You suggested.

Seungkwan's eyes lit up at that and he reached over to grab his phone. "If Soonyoung's friends with him, then they're probably following each other so... Ah! There he is. A childish username, as expected."

He gave his phone to you and you scrolled through Seokmin's profile, many were pictures of food or his friends, but you stopped at one photo that caught your eye. It was of him at a park, trying to act casual for a photo (as anyone would), but wrapped around his neck was the famous red scarf.

"Perfect." You muttered to yourself. Now all you had to do was buy that scarf and hope that it comes quickly.

Or else things would become terribly awkward.

=====

Buying that scarf turned out to be much more difficult than you thought it would be.

No matter how deep you searched on the internet or how many times you looked at the photo of his precious scarf, there was no trace of the exact same copy.

"Don't tell me it was handmade." You groaned and got up from your seat to flop onto your bed instead. You stared at the ceiling for a while, long enough for your laptop to fall asleep.

"Maybe it's a high-end brand?" You speculated quietly to yourself and rolled onto your side to stare at the wall instead.

"No... This guy eats ramen every other day in the caf, there's no way he can afford that."

You rolled onto your back once more and pouted at absolutely no one.

Why did you have to get into this situation with someone you hardly knew?

=====

The next day you went to class at the normal time to avoid having to see Seokmin when he inevitably greets the class. However, when you took your seat and discreetly glanced at his spot, it was empty. Minus Soonyoung's bag that sat there instead.

You chewed on your lip for a while, wondering if his unusual absence had anything to do with yesterday.

"Good morning!"

Your shoulders relaxed at the familiar voice and you almost let yourself send him a smile when you remembered that you were supposed to be avoiding him. You immediately stiffened and stared at your table. Seokmin didn't look your way for the entirety of the lecture, which you were almost grateful for, but it also left a sinking feeling in your stomach.

On the way out, he did end up glancing at you and you immediately turned to Seungkwan to strike up a meaningless conversation.

"Make it seem like we're busy with something, he's looking my way."

Seungkwan rolled his eyes. "I talked to Soonyoung yesterday and he brought up what happened 'cause apparently he thought it was really funny. He said Seokmin wasn't mad but didn't really know what he's supposed to be doing either."

You nodded, pretending like you were listening to him and he continued on.

"Seokmin's a kind soul, you know. I doubt he's ever been angry at anyone before."

"That just makes me feel even worse though," You whined and watched Seokmin leave the room with another classmate by his side. "And I told him that we'd meet up again but I'm not ready at all. What's he gonna think about that?"

"Then you could go up to him and say that you're still sticking to your promise, but you still need time to think about what to do. Maybe he'll tell you what he wants then." Your friend suggested, poking at your work to tell you to start cleaning up.

"I think I'm going to avoid him until I'm fully prepared. So I don't mess this up." You decided, completely ignoring Seungkwan's words and the boy sighed.

"What did I do to have such dense friends?"

=====

The week before exams was spent cramming some last-minute studying with your friends in the community library.

It's been a while since you last spoke to Seokmin.

Which translates to "you haven't spoken to Seokmin since the incident."

You ignored those worries and buried yourself in work instead. Using yet another excuse to get out of the very problem you should probably be prioritizing.

Besides, focusing on Minghao and Jun, who were bickering over who left the empty juice carton in the mini-fridge seemed far more interesting. You giggled when Minghao practically brought out photo evidence to defend his point and Jun spluttered out a shocked response after being called out. As their conversation grew louder and louder, you quickly scanned the library, searching for the librarian to make sure you weren't going to be chewed out for being noisy.

You stopped when you spotted Seokmin sitting next to Chan, who ran the dance club you've always admired. His nose was buried in a book. It was only for a brief moment — perhaps a second or two — but you stared at him from afar, taking in his sharp features and gentle smile.

When he felt your gaze on him and locked eyes with you, you immediately looked away, trying to not let him know that you saw him.

"I gotta go." You muttered and packed up your stuff, leaving behind a bewildered Minghao and even more bewildered Jun (who was still trying to recover from the previous attack).

All those days preparing yourself crumbled right in front of you. This wasn't supposed to be happening, this wasn't moving according to the plan you promised you'd stick to.

He wasn't supposed to beat you to it.

"Y/n!"

You carried on, pretending to have not heard him and prayed that he would just give up. He was Lee Seokmin though, so of course, he didn't stop.

"Y/N!" He shouted a little louder this time and you could hear his footsteps getting closer and closer, just like on that fateful day at the elevator. You took a deep breath and braced yourself for the confrontation.

"Hey, Seokmin."

To your surprise, he gave you a big smile. "Hey! 'Was worried I wouldn't be able to catch you just now. You were walking so quickly, where are you headed?"

"Oh..." Away from you. You thought to yourself, but said something else, trying to play it cool. "Nowhere in particular, just on a walk. Needed some fresh air after spending so much time in the library. It’s always stuffy when everyone’s cramming for exams." You rambled on.

"Can I join you?"

"Sure." You lied with a small smile.

You walked in silence for a while, with you leading the way, cheeks heating up with every second that passed.

"You've been avoiding me haven't you?" He finally spoke up.

The tips of your ears burned. "I wasn't trying to."

"If it's about what happened in the elevator, you don't have to worry about it." He prompted lightly and you stopped walking.

"Well, I am worrying about it." You admitted. "Because not only was that your first impression of me, but I know that scarf meant a lot to you and it was such a stupid way for it to get destroyed."

You took a deep breath and continued before he could think of an answer. "I'm trying to buy you another scarf, but I've been having some trouble finding it anywhere..." You admitted.

"Ah," Seokmin chuckled. "My grandmother made that scarf so I doubt you'd be able to find it online."

"It was from your grandmother?" You rubbed your face, thinking about all the hours spent examining the photo and struggling to find the perfect match. "I'm so sorry, that's even worse than it just being your favourite."

He shrugged. "Nah, it's fine, I got over it after that day."

You couldn't hide the look of surprise when he said that.

"To be honest, she's been trying to get me to ditch that scarf because I wore it too much. It's a good excuse to get a new one now!" He finished happily and you suddenly felt less tense.

"Your grandmother makes nice scarves, though. I never knew that there was a little design on it until, well, until it ripped. But it was beautiful! Please give her my compliments."

Seokmin let out a shy laugh. "Ah, you're talking about the little bunnies and sunflowers stitched onto it, right? I've always worn the scarf inside out because I don't know what people will think when they see it."

"What?!" You blurted out, incredulous. "They're really cute! If anyone were to hate on the cute bunnies then they're going to have a word with me." You joked, pretending to get into a fighting stance. "I would definitely wear that scarf proudly, but what makes you comfortable, of course."

"Interesting. Hearing that does make me a little for confident." He hummed. The conversation stilled for a brief second before he spoke up again. "What are your plans for the break?"

You blinked at the sudden change of topic. "Uhm, nothing much, probably just heading back to spend time with family."

"Cool! My plans are the same. How about you meet me..." He walked over to a nearby bench and planted his feet firmly on the ground. "Exactly here on the day, we get back. Does that sound okay?"

"Why?" You asked, but he was already backing away. You stepped forward, insisting on an answer but he refused to give you one and you could only nod your head in agreement.

"I'll see you then... I guess..." You called out weakly, speaking to practically no one because the boy was already on his way elsewhere.

And just like that, your conversation with Lee Seokmin ended.

====

Winter break soon arrived and left as quickly as it came.

You arrived exactly 5 minutes before the meeting time and Seokmin arrived exactly 5 minutes after the meeting time.

"Y/n!"

You waved when you heard the familiar voice and the two of you shared a warm smile despite the cold weather.

"Sorry to keep you waiting," He continued. "How have you been!"

"I've been alright, how about you?"

He replied with his own "same old, same old" and you sent him a curious look when the small talk died down. "So why did you ask to meet up today?"

"Yes! About that." His hand drifted towards his neck and he didn't even have to speak for you to piece two and two together.

Wrapped around his neck was a new scarf, the same style as the old one, but this time, it was a soft shade of pink. Embroidered along the front was a small line of bunnies and flowers, perfect for the spring that was soon to come.

You brightened at the sight and let out a small gasp. "You got a new one! Nice!"

"Yep! And," Seokmin placed something warm in your hands and you realized he's been carrying it with him this entire time. "This is for you."

You stared at the scarf in your hands. It was a lovely shade of blue. "Wh— why do I get a scarf too?"

He laughed and fidgeted with his sleeves. "You spoke so fondly of my old one, I thought you'd appreciate having one for yourself so I asked my grandmother to make an extra one."

"That makes me feel even worse!" You cried out, guilty for not only ruining his old scarf but also inadvertently making him do more work to gift you something you didn't think you deserved.

"No, please don't feel bad!" He immediately replied, eyes wide to get his message across. "She was happy to make another and honestly, I just wanted to clear things up so that we don't start off on the wrong foot, you know?"

"Thank you." You pouted, still feeling a little bad, but you wrapped the scarf around your neck nevertheless. Seokmin smiled as he watched you and you grabbed the end of the scarf to admire the handiwork.

"They have the same pattern. We're matching with each other now." You quietly noted and suddenly the atmosphere between you two grew warmer.

"I guess we are! This makes us scarf buddies now, I guess." Seokmin smiled sheepishly. "We are bound by an unfortunate incident, but I hope to turn it into something positive. We can be friends, right?"

"I should be the one asking you that, idiot." You replied with a grin. The grip you had on the scarf got a little bit tighter. "Of course we can be friends, I would love to be your friend."

The smile on his face reminded you of when you first saw him.

Suddenly, your phone went off in your pocket, signalling that it was a good time to start heading to class. So much for an easy transition back into the school year.

"I should probably get going now," You started at the same time Seokmin spoke up.

"I promised I would meet up with—"

You both paused mid-sentence before bursting out in laughter at the coincidence.

"We have a lecture together tomorrow, right?" He asked excitedly and you nodded. "We can continue our conversation later then."

You laughed. "I'll see you tomorrow, scarf buddy."

=====

The next day went by accordingly, starting with a familiar “HELLO!~” from the boy who loved to eat bagels at 8 in the morning and wear scarves in any kind of weather.

The only difference is that this time, he took the seat to your right instead of one at the opposite end of the hall. He greeted you with a smile and you happily started up a lively conversation before class started. Decorating both your outfits were your matching scarves, flowers and rabbits on the outside for the world to see.

This way, everyone could know that you guys were scarf buddies.

#newskynet #kdiner #caratwritersclub #seventeen #lee seokmin #dk #dokyeom #seventeen dk #seokmin x reader #seventeen x reader #seventeen fluff #dk fluff #seokmin fluff #nose-bandaid

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porkchop-ao3 · 3 years

Text

A Thrill I’ve Never Known (Chapter 64)

Loose Ends

Yep, I’m still alive! Just not spending any time at all writing 😅😬 Here’s another chapter anyway, I hope you enjoy! Also, happy holidays and here’s hoping for a better 2021!!

Tagging @emily-strange and @actuallyhansolo ❤

(All chapters tagged with #ATINK and also posted on Ao3, username PorkChop)

We moved west, staying north, and found a place to camp far from where any Pinkertons were still patrolling. We travelled for hours, all through the remaining hours of the night, through the morning and into the afternoon. We ended up at Cotorra Springs when the sun began to set; it was cooler there and when we found a spot away from any trails, pretty secluded, we decided it was as good a place as any. The rushing sound of the geysers erupting every now and then kept making me jump at first but soon became a somewhat comforting sound. A reminder that no matter what happened, life always carried on, the world wasn't going to stop spinning and fall to pieces just yet.

We set up a small campsite with a few tents and a fire, over which we cooked meat from a deer that Charles had hunted while the rest of us set up. None of us knew how long we would be there but it was clear that we all needed some food and some rest before we even attempted to figure out our next move. We all sat around the fire with our food and little Jack was asleep with Cain by his side; the dog had tagged along with us on our journey, jumping atop the Marston's wagon whenever he got too tired.

"What exactly are we all gonna do?" John was the first one to bring up the elephant in the room, and everyone turned to eye him almost irritatedly.

Nobody spoke up or offered any sort of response, and after a moment, Lenny threw his hat in the ring.

"It's a good question. We can't live like this forever, can we?"

"Course not," Arthur said. He didn't quite snap the words but they weren't untroubled. "We've got a chest full of money on that wagon, we'll… we'll figure out what everyone wants to do and split it accordingly."

"I don't want a penny of that money," Sadie hissed, then spat into the fire, "reeks of Dutch and Micah and dirty betrayal."

"Hey, that implies it was all their money. Dutch barely put a penny in if it weren't from a job we all did together," John scoffed.

"I don't want it either but let's be rational. We're gonna need it," Charles said, looking at Sadie. "We didn't just go through all that only to starve to death at the end of it, all because of pride."

"He's got a point," I agreed. "I don't think any of us should have a problem taking that bastard's money," I added.

"Ain't his money," John shook his head, picking at something stuck in his teeth, "it's our half, fair 'n' square."

"Yeah," I nodded after a moment, but frowned a little. Silence lingered.

"It's obvious none of us feel too good about takin' it," Abigail broke it, stating the unspoken.

"I feel fine," John snorted.

"Me too, for the most part," I hesitantly agreed. Arthur sighed beside me and everyone looked at him.

"For the love of God, not a single one of you refuse that money. This is hard enough, at this point, that money's the only thing that made this possible. Without money, we're trapped, and if we're trapped, we'll end up in the damn ground," he told us through tensely gritted teeth. More silence followed, broken by Susan.

"You're right, Mr. Morgan. This ain't no time for pride and making things needlessly hard on ourselves. We've just gotta take this opportunity to get the heck out of this mess, so I don't wanna hear no bellyaching from any of you," she said sternly, and John nodded in agreement. Lenny took a breath, and nodded too.

"And what're you gonna do Miss Grimshaw?" I asked her softly. She met my eyes across the fire, her brows arching a little in surprise that I'd asked.

"Me? I'm- I'm–" she began hesitantly, and glanced at the others before letting out a breath.

"You ain't thought about it none?" Abigail asked, and Susan turned her gaze to her.

"Quite the opposite," she scoffed a laugh, then patted the side of her hair bun in an attempt at brushing back fly-aways. "Maybe I'm just a little bit ashamed to admit that I've been planning for this for a while."

My eyes widened, and so did most of the others'.

"Oh come on. Please. A woman would have to be foolish to not consider a few back up plans in this way of life. Especially with how things have been the past few months. Even Miss O'Shea had her plans," she added, and my eyes dropped down at her mention. I always felt strange about the whole Molly situation, considering I was potentially the last person to really talk to her.

"You ain't wrong. So what's your plan?" Abigail asked.

"I know a lot of people Miss Roberts, I have options," she chuckled. "But I think I envision a future in moonshine. An old friend of mine's been wanting to go into business together for a while now, I think I'll pay her a visit."

"Which old friend is this, anyone we know?" Arthur questioned.

"No. If you knew her, you'd know exactly who I'm talking about. She ain't a lady you easily forget," Susan chuckled, shaking her head.

"Ain't nothing to do with those Braithwaites, then?" John snorted and Susan rolled her eyes.

"The Maggie I know would sooner hang than have anything to do with those idiots," she laughed. I smiled as I watched her laugh, feeling my admiration for her swell. Susan was a woman I would never be like, and I knew I'd miss her sorely despite all of the times I'd giggled when one of the girls would roll their eyes or pull a face at her behind her back. I knew everyone had a lot of love for her, and I did too.

"What about you then, Lenny?" Arthur asked. "What's your plan?"

"Ohh, I'll be a rolling stone for a while I think, see where life takes me. I’d like to… learn,” he said almost hesitantly, a mild frown puckering the skin between his brows. His eyes lifted and settled on Charles for a brief moment, “maybe, if the stars align, I might just have a chance at making something of myself,” he laughed, but there was an ugly reality behind his words that bittered them slightly, though he kept smiling, and it was no accident that it was Charles that his eyes landed on. The smile that Charles returned to him was one of quiet understanding.

“My father, he wanted me to be a lawyer,” Lenny turned his grin to me, his eyes brightening a little. “From bank robber to lawyer, can you imagine that?”

I chuckled, despite the fact that with Lenny’s intelligence, charisma and articulateness, I didn't doubt his capability.

“Dutch always said I had too much potential to stay robbing banks for the rest of my life,” he breathed, looking down into the fire, the flames reflecting in his eyes, making them shine bright even though his energy dulled a little at his mention. Yet another silence fell across the campfire and I kept my eyes on the young man before me, so full of potential yet held back by so many factors far out of his control, and my heart hurt.

“I think that's the only thing I know of that came out of his mouth and made a lick of sense,” I noted. He looked at me, held my gaze for a few moments, then released a quiet breath.

“Maybe I’ll head to Washington D.C. Try to get a job, or go to school. I don't know about being a lawyer,” he breathed a laugh and shook his head, “but doing something… more than what I have been doing. That’d be good. I think my dad would be proud of that.”

“Your dad would be proud of you already, Lenny. I mean that. You’re a good kid, got a good heart,” Arthur told him, and everyone made a show of agreement, nodding, humming confirmations and patting him on the shoulder.

“Thanks, all’a you, I… it's been quite a ride, ain’t it?” Lenny sighed.

“That it has…” Charles trailed off.

“And I think I’m gonna hit the hay,” Abigail announced, dropping her plate on the ground before rising to her feet. I watched as she very carefully bundled Jack up into her arms. “Goodnight, y’all.”

“Goodnight,” the rest of us whispered softly, as if suddenly we would all wake up the boy, even though he’d been sleeping just fine before.

“I need some sleep too,” John agreed, and it set off a chain reaction, and Lenny and Susan retired to their sleeping spots. Charles drained the contents of his bottle of the beer that Sadie had managed to snag before we all left.

“Arthur, tomorrow night we should…” he said quietly as he rose to his feet, trailing off. Arthur met his eyes and stared silently for a while, then nodded.

“We will.”

“Alright. Thank you,” Charles nodded, then headed towards his tent.

“I weren’t planning on leaving him, not for a second,” Arthur called after him and Charles waved a hand dismissively, smiling over his shoulder at him.

“I know. Goodnight, folks,” he added, then crawled inside his tent to bed down for the night. I glanced at Arthur for some clarification and his eyes dropped to the ground.

“Eagle Flies got captured by the army. I said I’d break him out, I have to, princess–”

“Don't think I’m gonna try to stop you,” I whispered. He turned his head towards me, and I kissed his cheek.

“Thank you. He got caught when I was helping Dutch screw the lot of ‘em over, pretending to be helpful. I gotta speak to him and his father, tell them about what happened with the gang today. Eagle Flies can’t keep on trusting him, getting sucked in by his fancy words just like I did at his age. It won’t do anyone any good in the end,” he explained, and I nodded in agreement.

"You need some help breaking him out?" Sadie questioned. Arthur met her eyes and shook his head.

"Charles has a plan, shouldn't need more than the two of us."

"In that case, maybe there's something you can help me with instead," she said, leaning forwards, elbows on knees. My stomach squeezed a bit at the way her eyes lit with devilish determination. "O'Driscolls. There's a bunch of 'em hiding out over at Hanging Dog Ranch."

"Sadie–" Arthur began, his hand raising.

"With Colm gone and with just a few stragglers left, we can end those bastards for good," she cut him off, her hands clenching into fists. I took a breath and looked down at my feet, pressing my lips together.

"Sadie, I… I don't think we– we just got out of a bad situation, we're doing all we can just to get by–" he began again, and I could feel his tense but careful sympathy in his tone.

"We can finish 'em. We can. This is all I got left now, bringing some kinda justice to those sick bastards after what they did to me, what they did to my husband," she leaned forwards even more, her body tensing up, I could see her from the corner of my eye, getting full of desperation. I sensed Arthur glance at me.

My heart ached. We were finally away from Dutch and I had hoped that it would be the end of Arthur risking his life over grudges. I could handle him going with Charles to break a good man out of prison, I wasn't happy about the risk he was putting himself at but I knew he had to do it. But going to kill O'Driscolls? I was so conflicted. Sadie deserved closure over what happened to her husband, but I didn't want to lose Arthur over it. I couldn't stand it if we came this far only to–

"Please, Arthur. I need someone to ride with me. I can't go in there on my own but if I got no one–” Sadie's voice cracked and my eyes flashed up to her. "You're the only one I trust to do this with me and do it right. And I gotta do it, Arthur, I can't just let them get away with it. Please."

I stared at Sadie, feeling her pain emanating from her in waves, it made the hairs on my arms stand up and bile rise in my throat. My eyes tingled as tears threatened to form there, and Arthur looked at me again. Then Sadie did. Suddenly, I found, it was my choice, without even saying a word.

I nervously toyed with the locket around my neck, and saw Arthur's eyes momentarily flitter down to it.

"Arthur you–" I began after some time, when it was made clear that they were waiting on my blessing. Mine. Like I had any control over anything. "Sadie's done so much for us," I said monotonously, though it wasn't without feeling, "it's clear she needs this."

"Thank you!" Sadie exhaled, and I rose to my feet.

"I need to sleep," I whispered, then stepped over the log I'd been sitting on and headed for the tent I shared with Arthur. "Goodnight."

I climbed inside and laid down on my bedroll, wrapping myself up in the blanket and curling up on my side. I could hear quiet voices outside the tent, a muffled mix of soft tones from both Sadie and Arthur, none of which I could make out as words. It was only a few minutes before cool air filled the tent as the flap was pulled back, and Arthur climbed in beside me. He shuffled around, getting under his own blanket and scooting up behind me, his hand gingerly resting on my hip.

"Princess," he whispered. I made a small hum of acknowledgement. "Are you okay?"

I nodded my head, and Arthur exhaled, then kissed the shell of my ear.

"Talk to me, please."

"I'm sorry Arthur. I'm trying not to put a leash on you, and trying to give Sadie the opportunity to get justice for her husband. All the while I'm worrying any one of these jobs people have you doing'll be the one that kills you. Right when we're finally doing what we've been waiting for," I whispered. Arthur's hand gently drifted up and down my side, his lips still at my ear giving me little pecks.

"I could try to reassure you, but it won't help, will it?" He said softly, sadly. I shook my head. "What do you want me to do instead?"

"Nothing. I don't want you to do anything, Arthur. I can't ask you not to do all these things. That's why I came in here to sleep, cause I know anything I say ain't gonna do any good."

"Are you angry with me?"

"No, I'm not," I breathed, then rolled over to face him. "I'm not mad, I'm worried. And I'll be worried until we're away from here for good. That's it. All I need from you is just to hold me right now, so I can enjoy the time I have with you," I told him, and kissed his chin. He wrapped his arms around me and rested his chin on my head.

"Just a couple more jobs, princess, then it's over. I promise," he told me.

"Please keep your word," I whispered, closing my eyes and nestling my face into his collar.

"I will. I'm under nobody's thumb no more, I do what I want. These things, they're just… they're things I gotta do for my friends. I know you understand that, right?"

"I do. It's why I'm not stopping you."

"I'm real lucky I have you. And that you're like this. You're a good woman," he told me and I chuckled, shaking my head a little.

"You don't have to flatter me, Arthur."

"I ain't flattering. I'm thanking you. Thank you," he said, pressed his lips momentarily to the crown of my head. "I love you."

"I love you too," I replied.

After a few moments of silence, Arthur spoke again. "Can I ask you something? Or shall I let you sleep?"

"Now I'm curious about the question. Go on," I answered.

"Where'd you get that locket from? The one you been wearing since I got back. Looks familiar."

The question surprised me. It wasn't anything like what I was expecting, and I laughed. Then stopped when I considered my answer. My heart was suddenly pounding because I knew I had to address how I had felt while he was away in Guarma.

"It was Susan's," I told him. "She gave it to me."

"That'll be why it's familiar," he mused.

"It has a photograph of you inside it," I added. He was quiet for a moment.

"It does?" He questioned, tone going up a note.

I hummed my confirmation. "I… I was real bad for a while when you was gone. Susan wanted to cheer me up. I haven't taken it off since."

"Did it make you feel better?"

"A little. It was nice to have something of you, at least. But it didn't hurt any less, that you were gone."

"It would've been a comfort to have something of you with me while I was away. I thought about you constantly, I wanted to see your face just once… I didn't even have my journal, with my drawings of you. They don't live up to the real thing but they're something, at least," he whispered, squeezing me tight.

"Let me see them," I whispered, kissing his collar bone. He made a small sound, a sort of hum, sort of sigh.

"My drawings?"

I nodded as I moved back a little to look at him. "I've only seen a couple of your drawings of me. How many have you done?"

"More than you've seen," he chuckled sheepishly, then rolled onto his back, staring up at the top of the tent. I shifted onto my elbow and gazed down at him.

"May I see?" I questioned insistently, his grin widened. He was embarrassed, it was clear. "It's just me," I whispered, stroking my hand over his chest.

"Just you? That's the problem."

"Problem?"

"I'm worried I'll embarrass you."

"Why would I be embarrassed?" I laughed. Arthur sighed and met my eyes.

"Get my journal," he acquiesced. I giggled and sat up, reaching for his satchel that sat by his feet. I retrieved the journal and handed it to him, but he nodded towards me, urging me to keep it. "Take a look, princess."

#rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #arthur morgan #fanfiction #arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan x female reader #atink #rdr2fanfic

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lucysuniverse · 3 years

Text

Critical Beauty

Am I the only one who thinks Jo Jinho is perfect just the way he is? Probably not. :D

To be honest I incredibly miss this man so I just wanted to feel him a bit closer while I am writing this story and he is serving in the military.

Happy Birthday Jinho! We love you all.

Pairing: Jinho x OC/reader

Genre: comfort, romance, angst

Word count: 6081

______________________________

I messed up. Like totally. My dad and those idiot colleagues of mine totally washed my brain. But after all I was the one ruining our relationship completely. And I could not blame him for having the will to break up with me because If I was in his shoes I would have done the same.

-|-

I knew it wasn’t right this way. We lived together for almost a year by now, and I couldn’t tell him. I couldn’t tell him that I was lying to him continuously in order to protect him from pain and save his self-esteem. Or at least this was my intention through-out the years.

We lived in a small flat. This is what we could afford. I just graduated from high-school and he was going to auditions. One after another. He was determined, and he was good. Insanely good. I couldn’t understand what is missing. What do you need more to become a singer? Didn’t he have outstanding vocals? He did. Didn’t he have a bit shy but loveable personality? He did. Didn’t he have sense of humor? HE DID. And on top of that he was handsome. WHAT WAS MISSING THEN???

As his girlfriend my heart was aching to watch all his efforts go to waste after so many years passed. We had a relatively big age gap between us. Well as long as you’re a teenager or young adult even two and a half years difference seem a lot. But later on, it doesn’t really matter. Especially not when you like someone. Because you like them for the person they are.

I loved him so incredibly. Because he was great. He was caring and cute but sometimes surprisingly masculine and very hot. I couldn’t wish for a better man. There was only one thing missing. Actually, not was but were. 5 more inches.

Because although we were quite far from each other in terms of age, we were all the more so close in terms of height. To be honest I guess I might have been smaller than him, but it never felt like that. And every time I thought about this I felt ashamed. Because that was the only thing which gave me hard times. I wouldn’t say I didn’t like his height. I liked everything about him. But sometimes I just wished he was a tiny bit taller, or I was even smaller (if that was possible).

Sometimes I found myself wondering about this: this couldn’t be the reason of him failing all those auditions, right? They can’t be so mean right? If you’ve ever heard a good singer than you would know that Jo Jinho was one of them.

This is why I always told my father to wait just a little. He was really opposing our relationship. I would have understood his concerns if he had real reasons, since I was his only daughter. But what he always said was ridiculous, narrow-minded and I just resent him for that.

“When will he finally stop this stupid joke of becoming a singer. Didn’t he have enough throughout these years?”

“I am fine dad. How about you?” I said as a reply. I was so fed up listening to his bullshit all the time. He heard Jinho singing. And even though he would have never admitted, he knew Jinho was born to be a singer. Anybody could tell. But sadly, in his eyes only those are real men who are lawyers or doctors. When they divorced with mom, he even found me a real man… My dad thought I should go on a blind date with the trainee of his divorce lawyer. He even complimented his ears! Like what the heck! My always logical and strict dad tells me to date the trainee of his divorce lawyer because he has nice ears.

Don’t get me wrong I’ve never thought about leaving Jinho, but my dad nagged me all the time so I checked the guy’s social media pages. Funfact: he was born on the freaking same day in April as Jinho. Am I freaking joke?

“Little woman… I am your dad no need to act like this. But think about your future kids. Will they be also minions?”

“Bye dad it was good to talk to you.” And I hung up. I didn’t want to ignore him. After all he was my dad. But we never had a good relationship. Well a relationship at all. But the irritating thing was that even if I tried to ignore all these comments he made me angry. I couldn’t stop myself. I should not marry Jinho but we are already expecting kids?! And minions? And these are my dad’s words when he himself isn’t a giant either. ARRGGGGHHH!

“Hi babe! Is everything okay?” Jinho asked. And as always, I put on a nice smile and said “yeah, all good.” And I hated myself for that.

-|-

“What is that?” He asked curiously. I didn’t know he was still at home. I wanted to put the box back under the bed as soon as possible but it was too late he saw it.

“Oh this? It is just something stupid. It is not important. Did you leave something here?”

“Yeah, I left my phone on the charger. But don’t change the topic. It must be something important if you were staring at it so dearly.”

“Oh no. You misunderstood.”

“Okay, enough of this. What’s that? Do you have something to hide from me?” And even though he didn’t say this in an offended way there was edge in his voice.

“It’s your birthday gift.”

“My birthday gift?”

“Yeah.” I knew this couldn’t work. But I couldn’t come up with a real acceptable reason.

“It was last month. And procrastination is your middle name so it can’t be for my next one, I am not buying this. So, what is that?”

“I will bring this back okay? I don’t know why I bought this. I must have lost my mind. I just …”

“Oh show me finally.” And before I could give him the box he took it out of my hands.

“You must be kidding me, right?” He asked after 3 minutes of torturing silence.

“Look I am sorry. I know we should be saving money and …. but I can ask for refund and also…”

“You created such a big scene just because of this?” And he was laughing. He was LAUGHING!

“What? Aren’t you mad?”

“Why would I be? Should I?”

“Oh… yeah. I mean no. No. I just thought… I just…”

“You thought I would be upset to found out that my girlfriend is secretly buying a pair of high-heels for herself to feel pretty? I am getting more upset now that I know you felt like you should hide this. Also, why did you think I didn’t want to see your pretty legs in this? I thought you knew me better. If that’s all I am off for work. Bye babe see you in the afternoon.” And he gave me a light kiss on my forehead. And I felt on my skin he was smiling. “And I hope next time I see you, you’ll be wearing these.” And he casually left the room.

I made a fool out of myself. I really thought he would be offended by this. I mean it wasn’t a big deal to give up on high-heels. They weren’t very comfortable anyway and we really had to save money. But I was young and for the first time in my life I felt getting more feminine. Maybe I was already but this time I started to realize.

I thought it was selfish of me having these secret desires to put on a bit tighter clothes and wore high-heels especially when he is not really taller than me, but after having this conversation I was even more encouraged. I knew he didn’t have problems with it and that was all that mattered. I was happily tiptoeing to the office. My colleagues even complimented me.

The girls were jealous for having those nice shaped legs, and the boys… let’s not talk about them. If you think they will become serious once they grow up… Well friend you are totally mistaken. Boys will be boys. But they didn’t cross the line, in their own way they complimented me as well. And I felt confident and happy. All thanks to my sweet boyfriend whom I could always rely on.

I was in a really good mood until the point I let some idiots ruin my day. I couldn’t say they ruined it. I was the one let them do it. I just wish I never overheard their conversation.

“I was wondering why she is never coming to the year-end parties but now I see. The company is not yet prepared for those legs.”

“That was a good one bro. But they say she is just staying home all the time with that hopeless guy. I feel sorry for her to have such a boyfriend.”

“What really? Why aren’t they coming together?”

“Another rumor says it the guy is a dwarf. So, she is rather staying home with him.”

“Wow. How do you know so many things?”

“Resources…”

“Which girl then?”

“The blondie in the red jeans.”

“Mmmmmh.”

“Stop it she is mine.”

“Until when?”

“Tonight. Then you can have her.”

“You are disgusting man. Well done.” And they laughed.

“Ah but that sweetie. I really feel sorry for her. Having that boyfriend can be very burdensome.”

“Oh yeah. If I was her boyfriend, I would make sure she feels good in every situation.”

“You mean every position.”

“Exactly.” And they laughed again. “You know me so well.”

I felt dirty. It’s not like they did anything specific to me. They were just fantasizing. But I felt fucking dirty in that moment. I wanted to erase this conversation from my head but instead I heard their words repeatedly in my head.

I heard my shoes making that irritating sound on the street while I was going home. With every step I felt smaller and smaller. I regretted wearing that stupid high-heel… So as soon as I arrived home I put them back in their box cleaned, ready to bring them back to the shop. I would want to throw them away instantly but then suddenly I thought about Jinho.

We need to spare money. He needs to buy some nice clothes for the next audition. And also, we barely manage to pay the bills since I just started studying in the med school and next to collage it is quite hard to work. Sometimes I thought maybe I should just quit dreaming about becoming a doctor but there was a senior doc, my supervisor who inspired me a lot. Last month he helped that well-known celebrity couple. He said the lady had some complications while she was giving birth to their little girl but the doctor helped them and finally the little Daisy was born healthy. Some of my fellow classmates said he even resembles Jinho…. I don’t know why.

Talking about Jinho, he was quite clueless when he found me eating the third bowl of ice cream and watching Lovely Complex.

“You are still watching this?”

“Anime is not only for kids. And well I’ve just become an adult anyway, meaning I am still a kid. Let me be. Oh and if you go to the kitchen can you bring me the last Ben & Jerry’s? I know I shouldn’t be buying these but I just felt like having a pajama party on my own. Thanks babe. ”

“Look.” And he sat down next to me and slowly took away the Ben and Jerry’s from my hands to put it on the table. “Can we talk about today morning?”

“Sure. But what is there to talk about?”

“I hate it when you act like this. And the funny thing is that you know I do.” He smiled bitterly. I was aware of it. None of us were stupid. Well… we both were very clever to be honest. When I acted silly it was either out of fun or I was trying to hide something. Just like now.

“Okay. Sorry.”

“I feel like you are kind of disappointed in me. And I just wanted to let you know and thank you for enduring all these days and months together with me. I know that even if you don’t tell me that it is hard to tell your parents that I still didn’t make it.”

“Jinho it’s not your fault.”

“That is showbiz, I know. The only thing that hurts me is that when I started this utterly long and unpredictable journey, it was me and only me. But since then we found each other, and me failing all the time is not only an individual concern. We are a team. And I am not a good team mate. You just graduated and want to become a doctor. And I should support you.”

“Jinho you’ve already done so much for me, you can’t even imagine. And you do every single day. Even today. So, don’t just please don’t say you don’t support me, when you support me the most.”

“But then what’s wrong?”

“What do you mean?”

“Even after so many years I’ve never met your colleagues and I hardly ever meet your dad. I know you are working part-time and you are tired from doing college and your job at the same time but these parties could help you relieve stress a bit.”

“I don’t want you to meet those idiots.” And well, this was true. Not only because they would make a joke out of us, but after today I was kind of ashamed of working with those bastards.

“But I guess not all of them- oh what’s this? I am sorry babe but I need to pick this up, we will catch up on this okay?”

A producer called him. Or should I say the producer? The one who just became a dad. The one whose wife gave birth to the little Daisy in our hospital with the help of my professor. That producer. I was insanely happy. Finally, good news. I couldn’t bear anything bad any longer. But the worst was yet to come.

-|-

We were walking hand in hand on the streets. Finally, a promising audition. It was on Saturday so I could go with him to the company and show some support as I should. Once the audition was over Jinho shook hands with the producer. I could imagine them working together. I even found cute how they were both quite small.

Jinho said they would contact him later, but he had a good feeling about finally making it. I was so happy. I’ve never saw him so hopeful after an audition. When we were leaving the company there were six model like people nearing us. I was sure they just walked out of Vogue. The two most likely European girls alongside the four men suited each other very well. But not all the boys were Korean. One boy’s appearance shouted “Shanghai Prince” the other’s “Nagano Prince” but don’t ask me why. I just had this feeling.

I don’t know how Jinho felt but I was in awe. They looked stunning. Flawlessly chitchatting about a Flower Shop in the nearby. I always thought models have other topics to talk about. Well the owner of that shop must have done something very well then to become a hot topic.

“They were cool right?” He asked suddenly.

“Yeah.”

“Just wait a little longer. I will become one of them anytime soon.”

“I know.”

And I really knew that he would succeed. He was supposed to be a singer. I even imagined myself becoming his manager. I loved helping people. And I was determined about med school, but for him I could have given up on it. I knew with his music he may be curing more people in his life than me as a doctor. So after all our goal was the same.

As we were nearing home familiar faces were getting closer. The two guys that bullied me in high school. They always had something against me. If I had red nails I was a slut if I wore a turtleneck they called me a nun. They ate my lunch, stole my notebooks etc. Same old thing. Bullies are so uncreative.

“Oh hi dear. Long time no see.”

“Hi guys.” And I started to panic but wanted to grab Jinho’s hand and leave as soon as possible.

“Hey its Saturday, why such a hurry? Knowing you, you don’t have any plans or invitations, do you?”

“I am sorry boys, but we will be leaving.” Jinho said firmly.

“Oh, did you see someone? I heard a voice but I don’t know where it comes from.” One of them said.

“I don’t know man. Maybe our favorite girl can tell us.” And now they were both looking at me challengingly.

“You guys are still not tired of the same old shit, are you?” I asked with a bored face but deep inside I was startled. I hated seeing them again, I hated the fact that even after graduation they can do this to me and Jinho as well.

“Same old shit? Look at you. Are you talking about yourself?”

“It was enough. Get lost.” Jinho said again.

“It is strange I keep on hearing things but I don’t see anyone.” One said.

“Poor girl. You should have higher expectations. Are should I say taller?” The other added. And they laughed. I was about to cry. Why is this happening to us, when finally, things seemed to become better.

“Is he the best you could end up with? Oh god your still so low-class as you used to be… or is he not your boyfriend? Correct me if I misunderstood.”

And that was when I fucked up. I didn’t say anything. I hesitated. There were no good answers. I knew them so well, no matter what I was about to say, they would turn it against me. But even that should have been better than this.

“I am sorry guys, but if that’s the problem, I can tell you we are not together. Look at her. Is she someone to mess around someone like me? Definitely no. She is better than that. She has a taller, funnier and richer guy next to her. He has just entered that building at the end of the corner. I guess you both know which building I am referring to.”

“Is that true?” They asked at the same time.

It was our only chance to finally escape from this nightmare situation. They could stop us if they wanted any time. We were both too small to resist if they were up to something.

“Yeah, that’s right. He works there.”

And as if the curse was broken, they nodded with respect and were no longer blocking our way.

“If that’s the case, we are sorry about what we said. We knew you are going to make it. And who is that lucky guy? Yanan? Shinwon? Yuto? No waaaay. Oh my god are you dating Jung Wooseok?”

I had no clue what they were talking about, but I had this gut feeling that my dear ex-classmates became fanboys throughout the years. FANBOYS! It was ridiculous. I couldn’t help but smile out of embarrassment.

“I am sorry, but you also know that we should respect the artist’s privacy. I cannot say more.”

“Okay, so its Wooseok. Oh my god. He is a legend. Could you please get his autograph?”

“I am sorry but we should get going. Jinho has- wait… Jinho?”

“Oh the small guy? He left couple of minutes ago when it turned out you are dating Wooseok. Is he jealous by the way? He might have some feelings for you. But don’t mind him girl. You are dating the great Jung Wooseok. What else can a person ask for?”

For a forgiving boyfriend I guess. I left these two idiots there and I started to run after Jinho as fast as I could. Did he say he is leaving I just didn’t notice? Was he upset? Did he leave something at the audition? I called him several times but I couldn’t reach him. After going back to the company and checking the possible places where we were that day I decided to finally go home. I just hoped he would be there.

-|-

He was at home. And he didn’t seem upset. He told me to take a shower after this tiring day. It was his tiring day though. If only I had the audition today.

We spent the afternoon calmly he was practicing and I watched a movie. The male protagonist kinda resembled the divorce lawyer’s trainee. Yang Hongseok. And wait a second, he is at the same agency where Jinho had the audition. Nice. I was so happy and excited I really hoped they will call him back with good news.

Jinho was practicing for hours. He only did this when he was determined and wanted to prove himself before an upcoming audition or when he was hurt. I started to have a bad feeling. There isn’t any upcoming audition. Shit.

I prepared some nice food and I cautiously knocked on his door to tell him we can have dinner. He didn’t seem angry or anything he just casually nodded and we started to eat.

“About today… thank you for saving me. These two were always bullying me and if you weren’t next to me today I might have ended up crying and hurt again.”

“At least YOU are not hurt.” And the way he said ‘you’ was different.

After minutes of awkward silence he thanked for the food and was on his way to go back practicing.

“Wait Jinho.”

“Yeah?” He asked indifferently.

And I couldn’t ask what I wanted.

“There is dessert for you in the fridge.”

“For me? Aww. That’s nice. I thought it is for someone else. Maybe for Jung Wooseok.”

Bingo. I knew something was fishy…

“I don’t even know who that guy is. And you are well aware of this. Look, I know those two are disgusting and resentful but it was you who stopped them. It was thanks to your made up story that they finally stopped.”

“Oh right. You are so right. What if we just pretend not dating anymore? Maybe it will solve other worries too?!”

“What? Do you want to break up?”

And I saw that he kinda froze at this question. He didn’t mean it. But if he was mentioning break up he must have been hurt for real.

“No. Of course not. This is why I was kind of avoiding you. I wanted to talk about this when I have calmed down. But fine since it’s out it can’t be helped.”

I was getting nervous. The thought of losing him was more than painful. I didn’t want to live without him. I couldn’t live without him.

“I always thought we are a great team. Even if there are things we should work on we were always open about concerns and we solved the problems together. But I am worried this situation right now is not something we can change even if we work together.”

“We can solve everything together, okay? I want to solve it. Jinho please. I understand and realize that I must have hurt you with my words. And I am so sorry about that. I never wanted to hurt you. I should have told them the truth.”

“Do you know how much happier you looked when I said you are dating this illusionary taller, funnier and richer guy? Do you realize how relieved you were when they showed you respect for dating an idol? Do you get it finally? I love you so incredibly. But this is me. Only this much. I cannot give you more. I am working hard to get there. I might be there someday. But it won’t change facts. I am Jo Jinho, I am 5.6. I don't look like a model. I don’t have money. But I love you. That’s all I can give. But I am not sure it is enough. I am no longer sure I can give you the things you need. I am not sure what I can give you is the same as you want me to give you.”

“What?”

Is this really how I behaved? Is this really how I made him feel?

“I am not saying we should break up, but I am asking you to reconsider what you want from me and from this relationship. I want you to be honest. I promise you even if you say ‘I am sorry but I only date guys above 5.8’ it will hurt and I will be broken, but I will accept it. As long as I know you made the right choice in order to be with someone who can make you happy, I will accept your decision.”

“No Jinho. You totally misunderstood. I don’t want to date anybody else. Who cares about those stupid inches?”

“You. It was only you. Always. Did you ever hear me complaining about it? This might sound cruel but I learned to accept myself and love myself in this way. And it was a hard and long journey. I won’t pretend it is only about you. I don’t want to lose this confidence. I don’t want to become that insecure man I was before. But you make me feel like someone who needs to be protected, someone who should be hidden. I don’t want to feel like this.”

“I never wanted to hurt you.” I said while my tears were falling.

“I know you never did. It was unintentional. But you’ve hurt me. I just want you to realize a lot of things can be improved and changed, but my height is not something I can modify. Please just think about it. If you still want me this way, just let me know. I would be happy to stay together.”

And he left me there. I would want to hug somebody, and I needed his presence but, I was kind of glad he didn’t see my ugly crying face.

He was so damn right. And I could totally understand the way he felt. If you love someone you shouldn’t make them feel like trash. And it was always and only me who had those concerns. The rumors spread by the colleagues and my dad’s stupid words. I am not sure how I really felt. Maybe I was just influenced by them but I was worried I might have cared too much about his height.

Everything was up to me now. He was waiting for my answer. Even after I hurt him so bad, he didn’t want to break up. It was up to me to choose an average life with a divorce lawyer’s trainee type of guy, or choose a different type of life with him. A life with Jo Jinho.

-|-

We’ve slept separately. It was better this way. I was suffering alone but it just made me realize how much I needed his presence, how much I wanted to see his face when I woke up and how badly I wanted to feel his arms wrapped around me.

I prepared a nice breakfast. I wanted to clear things as soon as possible, but food is important too. Kids, don’t forget to eat breakfast!

“Hi! Good morning!”

“Good morning! Wow. So many nice dishes. Is this a compensation?”

“It’s an ‘I am sorry for being a bad girlfriend’.”

“Oh thank god it’s not an ‘I am sorry for breaking up with you’.” He said with a smile. But I couldn’t laugh at it. I know he was hurt. And him trying to make a joke out of it meant that he was hurt more than he showed.

“I am not gonna leave you Jinho.”

“I am sorry I didn’t mean it.”

“Look. I… I… messed up okay? I understand that even if I had good intentions I’ve hurt your feelings. But I think we can solve this too. I wanted to say thank you for finally saying what I should have heard. The thing is that you were right. I was the one obsessed with your height. And the saddest is that not specifically because of you. I thought if I am almost as tall as you I can not be a fragile, small woman. I wanted to be smaller, I wanted to be the one who needs to be protected. And I couldn’t accept myself in this way. I didn’t see me the way I wanted.”

“I wish you would see yourself with my eyes just to understand how beautiful you are.”

“I am sorry to make you feel bad when I was the one who couldn’t love myself. If you could help me to accept myself as you did back then, I think we would be able to stay together. And if you still love me I wouldn’t want anything more than this. I want nothing less and nothing more than you, Jo Jinho.”

-|-

Magic Bra. I was raising my eyebrows. Did she really make a successful business with such a company name? But when I checked on the internet the reviews were praising her insanely.

Lucy_1127 wrote: I was invisible before. But when my longtime best friend saw me in this red bra, he finally realized we were supposed to be together. I love this bra. It is indeed magical. My only regret is that it is more times on the floor than on me. (Moderators please don’t erase my comment *begs*)

Hoetaekie828 wrote: when the owner told me that this lingerie has magical power I was sceptic. I am 27 you know. I don’t believe in fairytales anymore. But when I saw her (my back then best friend now girlfriend)... Wow! She was indeed a beautiful princess from a fairytale. Since than I couldn’t thank the owner lady enough. We are regulars at the shop. I totally recommend it for couples, and for those friends who are shy to admit the truth.

Jinho didn’t tell me why I got this. He just told me this is a gift from him to me and also a part of our therapy. We didn’t apply for real therapy. But we agreed to rebuild our trust and change things. As a first step he told me to wear these. I was kind of surprised. Jinho wasn’t really a shy type but we were both so stressed recently, having a time dedicated to ourselves was so rare like a leap year.

When I put on the ‘magic bra’ I checked myself in the mirror. I wasn’t totally satisfied but I looked so different in these. I finally saw someone who is brave and confident. For the first time I thought if I work a bit harder, not only on my body and carrier but on my behavior and inner values, I might become someone who is worth of Jinho’s love. I really hoped so.

“Okay, so where is my lovely and concerned girlfriend who cannot see herself as a fragile, feminine woman? Because I only see a stunning, confident lady here. I am sorry miss, but even if it is so hard to send you off I will have to ask you to leave because I already have someone closed in my heart.” He said when he suddenly appeared behind my back. Our eyes met in the mirror.

“Oh is that so? That’s a shame then. Are you sure she wouldn’t allow this one? As long as you are happy I think she wouldn’t mind it.”

“Do you think so? Am I that kind of lucky guy? Well… let me see.” And he is seductive gaze was wandering all over my body. “No. I cannot do that to her I am sorry.”

“Why not? Is she so nice?”

“Yeah. She is a precious someone to me. And I promised something to myself. I wanted to show her how beautiful she is. I need to keep that promise. So even if your affair offer is very tempting I have to say no.”

“What a pity. I think she doesn’t even know how lucky she is… Is she more beautiful than me? That can’t be true. Mister you must be lying.”

“No, I am not. I love her and she is beautiful. What if I prove you?”

“Fine. If you prove me than I’ll be leaving and won’t seduce you. If you don’t prove me you’ll have to have an affair with me.”

“Okay.”

“So, how will you prove me?”

“Just look at yourself in the mirror.”

And even if I was confident pretending to be another lady for fun looking at myself in the mirror while he was watching me from behind was kind of embarrassing.

“You know my girlfriend is a bit insecure and even if I tell her she won’t trust me when I say she is beautiful. You have some similarities. You both are stubborn and don’t trust my words… bad girls…”

And I couldn’t help but laugh a bit. He was cute. I was grateful. And I loved him incredibly.

“So, for example if I would say I love how she puts her hair behind her ears she would be like: but it is nothing special.”

And as he said it he put my hair behind my ears and put a soft kiss on my neck. And then looked back at me in the mirror. And I started to get the taste of this whole thing. He was so freaking hot. He decided to show me how he loved each and every part of my body. He put soft kisses on my shoulders and wrapped his arms around my waist without taking his eyes off of me. And this excited me. For the first time I realized it was really not about being small or tall, fragile or not. He loved me and I loved him back. And we were perfect for each other just the way we were.

-|-

“Sorry but could you please go to the hall? Someone passed out. Oh god these fans these days…”

“Sure, I’ll be there in a sec.”

It wasn’t the first time in this week. Fans were crazy about him. And it was good to see that he finally received this much of love after working hard for his dream for the past years.

“I am here. How can I help? Where is the patient?”

“He is here.”

“You two?” I asked a bit shocked.

“Oh! Our favorite girl. Please save him!” Member 1 of the bully duo said. I am sorry but after what they’ve done to me throughout these years I don’t bother calling them on their names…

I just gave him first aid and after he woke up I made sure he is fine.

“You’ll be fine now.”

“Oh my goodness. Thank you. You saved him.”

“You saved me. Thank you. I have never thought one day you’ll be saving my life.”

“Trust me, this is not something I’ve expected either. But what are you two doing here?”

“We are fans!”

“I am sorry to let you down but Wooseok is not present today. This is Jinho’s solo concert…” I said a bit offended.

“Silly. We knooow. We came to support him.” They said.

“Oh, if that’s the case… I am glad. I think he would be happy to see your faces. But promise me you won’t faint in front of him okay?”

“Yes doctor!”

“Good.”

“Also… we are sorry… for everything.”

And I just nodded. I was happy that they apologized even if it happened after so many years later. But in a way I was happy that we met them on that day. I guess I needed to meet them to realize being critical about beauty is just so unnecessary. Beauty is so subjective, and is not only about visuals and heights. And when I looked back on Jinho talking happily with his fans signing the albums, I knew that in my eyes he was the most beautiful person, and nothing else mattered.

#jo jinho #pentagon angst #pentagon #petnagon jinho #happy jinho day #pentagon fanfic #pentagon fanfiction

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dzaneena · 3 years

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2020 Recap, Onwards 2021!

New year always makes us think of how our previous year has been. It’s been a heck of a ride and I think it would be sort of a good way to remind ourselves of the hardships, lessons learned, and growth there’s been in the past year. Here’s how mine turned out. January

Oh, new year, new hope. I thought this would be the year I could make it mine. Get the things I’ve always wanted and spoil myself with every little thing I could not have when I was younger. Job is going well, financially stable and able, everything was fine. This month, I’ve purchased my first Macbook. Yes, apparently I’ve been sucked up into the apple ecosystem and now I want to experience all of it if I can. I did and I’m happy about this. It’s been a dream for someone who always had to save each meal into two so I could have it for my next meal just so I can save money.

February

Oh, the month of love! Yes, yes. I had the chance to travel to Thailand, being the temporary adopted child of a friend’s family. I was thrilled to be there and experience this one-of-a-kind experience. At this time, the virus was not that rampant with everything and there were no restrictions for travel. We thought everything was fine and would be fine.

March

A week after arriving from our trip to Thailand, I got a text from one of my closest friends asking if I would like to spend a weekend in Vietnam with her. Well, of course I did! At this time, finances were a-ok! I could afford it. Plus, the food there was really good at a low price! We didn’t spend much on this trip. We just hung out and took photos here and there. We arrived one day before the city announced General Community Quarantine. We were lucky to arrive at that exact day or we would have been stranded in another country for God knows how long. :( Work was feeling the effects of the pandemic already. 50% of our workmates were laid off. This was a sad, sad time. I couldn’t help but think of all our workmates who had to think of how to survive without work through this pandemic under the quarantine with little to no mobility.

April

Work has been... work. Everyone had to cut their hours and get back to basic pay. I am thankful to still have work but this took a big hit with my finances, of course. I live alone. Recently paying off the house I’ve invested in from last year.

This was also the month my friends practically forced me to play mobile games. Thank goodness they did! This was where all my rage/frustration was spent.

May

Remember that house I invested in? Yeah, that went down the drain, literally lol. I’ve been having problems with leaks and puddles of water coming through the walls of the house which caused a chain of serious issues, health-wise and safety-wise. This was a hazardous house to live in. I guess it’s true what they say about things being “too good to be true”. I’ve tried to settle this with the landlord but I didn’t get not one penny back, not even my deposit. I’ve been paying this for over a year. Much, much regrets. There’s a whole lot that happened during this time. I had to move out and decided to just cut further losses and be done with it. I couldn’t sleep at night for no idea how many weeks/months because of all that money I’ve invested that just vanished. I still feel a weird kind of sadness every time it rains. It always flooded in that house whenever it rained. So you can see how much I relate to that movie “Parasite”.

June

Lucky I have a house to still come home to. This was the previous house I lived in before purchasing that God-forsaken flooded house. I was adjusting and trying to make the best of what I could for the time being. I had a small renovation project as well.

July

Renovation project going well and it was my joy to see how clients were happy about it. This was also the first time I was seeing my mother since January and it was only for a few hours because she had to go back to our hometown within 24 hours or else she would have to be quarantined. Traveling was such a pain during this time. We can’t even go visit our hometown to see our family.

On the bright side, I got to try out a lot of food (all home-cooked, of course). And I got to learn to cook some Korean food as well. I was well into the k-drama world for this whole time.

August

Kittens were growing up well. My cat gave birth in May but a lot of things happened then. I had 3 cats pregnant almost at the same time. Needless to say, we had to castrate our lover boy cat, Brutus. Though he had one last go before we did this and got another round of our cats getting pregnant. I can’t even. 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

Had the opportunity to do a product photoshoot for a local ice cream business. It was an amazing experience and it’s cool to think that people actually believe in my photography skills if I had any. LOL.

September

My birth month. I found out that I wasn’t even worth one minute of people’s time to text me. LOL. Well, life goes on. (Insert BTS’ Life Goes On)

On the positive side, my boyfriend’s family decided to do a Korean dinner (Samgyeupsal, Kimchi Jjiggae, Tteokbokki) for my birthday. It was really sweet of them. 😭🥰 I couldn’t spend my birthday with any of my family but they spent it with me. I’m tearing up just writing this down hehehe thankful for this second family.

October

One of my closest friends was getting married. I kid you not, we were waiting for this day to happen ever since college. We travelled to the city where he was getting married with the Friendship Pause crew. (That’s a whole other story LOL) It was nice getting a nice moment down from all the crap we’ve been facing.

I was also able to get back to my hometown for my mother’s birthday. Despite all the travel restrictions, we managed to push through. My eldest brother and I are the only ones not living in our hometown.

November

Ahh, yes. The year is almost over but it still feels like we’re stuck in March. During the span of the year lately, I’ve been actively looking for a second job for extra income. And thankfully, because I’m such a “never give up, never surrender” kind of person, I’ve landed a few jobs project-based for this year. I’ve been a graphic designer, personal assistant, transcriptionist, food photographer, social media manager assistant, etc. I’ve also landed my latest job from a start-up company. It’s amazing how some people can see your grit and potential. I pray we all get to do what we want to do in life so it won’t be such a chore to do. My first (online) job is the very first job that I actually enjoy and everyday, I am really excited to get work done. Hoping that this company recovers from the economic hit of the pandemic fast.

December

Ahh, the last month for this challenging year. What could be in store for us? I think this pandemic has hit us physically, emotionally, mentally, psychologically, and financially. It also makes you realize things. I realized that I’m no one’s go-to friend. I’m just that extra friend right there when you need me to be. Not a particular someone you call when something’s up. That’s okay, I guess. We can’t be everybody to...well, everybody! Haha!

I’ve been into tech lately and with all the gaming I was doing, I created a gaming page somewhere along in those past months. Streaming games was one of my stress relievers. Hopefully, if I can have a stable source of income, I’ll be able to do this full-time seeing that traveling is still out of the picture. All in all, this was such a shitty year. There are a lot of in-betweens that happened this year and I had to just highlight some things but basically, it’s just been so hard. I know I’m probably not the only one struggling and trying to survive on a daily basis. I am thankful that I have a job (3 actually, 4 if you count our online business on hiatus) and I am still able to put food into my stomach. But sometimes, we just need a good cry and some ice cream maybe.

If you’ve read this far, thank you! Thank you for actually caring to read my thoughts and random stuff I have in mind. We may not see each other but please know that I really appreciate your effort.

On a lighter note, I hope everyone will be happier this coming 2021. Stay safe!

#2020 2021 HNY happynewyear happynewyear2021

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aurora-teez · 3 years

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|Chapter 7| Utopia~ An Ateez Fanfic Story~

Emerald’s POV

Well...I am very surprised that I have not lost my entire mind right now. I mean is it normal for Poseidon to visit you and say that you are supposed to overpower the sea with a trident? NOOOO!! It is not!!! Oh my goodness, I feel like my head will explode. But at least I have Jongho keeping me calm, and he is very...mmmm...sexy as heck. I mean a man has never made my knees weak as he does. He is extremely sweet too.I mean all my life men have not been drawn to me for who I am but what they can get from me. I love how Jongho looks like me.I can tell he loves chocolate. Well my skin is more of a milk chocolate with caramel but anyways he still loves him some chocolate lol.milk He looks like a muscular cherry. Haha...don’t tell him I said that.

“Wait a minute...wait a whole dang minute! What is going on? A few days ago, I was a normal woman. A captain, a best friend, a girl living in a life she would not imagine having. Then now what? I’m supposed to have the power of a god to overpower something that is more powerful than him? This is insane”, I yell walking and pacing up and down the deck.

“Listen to me Emerald. I understand your confusion but like i said before. You are not normal. You are destined to do this. It brought Jongho to you. You are a precious jewel just as your father and mother named you after”, Poseidon says.

“Wait why do you know so much about me and my family?”, I ask sternly.

“Well...then I guess it is time to explain somethings”,He says. “Your father was a wonderful sailor. Before Pirate got their negative demeanor, pirates were known as sailors seeking the treasure that is the sea and hoped to discover all of it. In his youth, he was handsome and strong, He met a woman who was quite peculiar to most. The town had never seen her before but only knew she was noble descent and her eyes were 2 pairs of Emeralds. Your father fell in love with her and they got married and eventually had a child. You, my dear. You were very drawn to the sea always going to the water. But your mother was not only a noble but her family was from the sea. Your mother was from my home, Atlantis. A mermaid of strong power. Her family volunteered to go on land to see how it would be but she could not return back. Her power transferred to you but would only activate once you met your soulmate. Your father was her soulmate since he saw her and now Jongho is yours.”

“Are you telling me that my mother is a mermaid? That they kept this from me my whole life?!”, I say yelling.

“Oh god!”, Violet says still in shock as well

“I understand you are upset but please listen..”, I cut him off.

“LISTEN TO WHAT?! MORE LIES!”,I hold my hands out and I can feel the power coming from them.

“Umm..Emerald. I think you should put your hands down”, Yeosang says lookign terrified.

“Please tell me why no one told me this for over 10 years! You know why because they think i was fragile and weak or I could not take it! Well guess what? I have learned how to deal with all the pain of losing my father and mother! I still feel that pain everyday of my life and now I have to deal with this monster of a sea!”, I am full of anger and I notice that everyone is moving back slowly.

“Em. Baby, please look at me and let your hands down before you drown us”,He says smirking at me trying to calm me down.

I look behind me and I see a large wave of water hovering behind me in the ocean.

“Oh my god”, I gasp and out my hands down gracefully making the water still and calm.

I notice that some water was splashed on Jongho and his caramel abs are shown through his shirt that he just buttoned up after showing us the coordinates on his back. I bit my lip as he runs his hand through his cherry red hair. His caramel skin glistening with the few droplets that passed throughout the fabric

THIS MAN!

Poseidon waves his hands and suddenly, drys everything on the deck and all of our clothes. Dang I was enjoying the view.

“Well I see that your water manipulation is used by your emotions. That’s interesting”, Poseidon says smiling.

“Listen, I am sorry for yelling. It’s just a lot”, I say softly and Jongho wraps his arms around me.

“There is one more thing. The reason why you are so powerful is because you are the goddess of the sea. The first and only one ever’, Poseidon says.

“Whoaaaaaa!”, Violet says in shock.

“That’s why she is so beautiful”, San says smiling.

“Hey.Watch it”, Jongho says

“Jong, I am just saying. No harm done”, San says and everyone laughs.

“Well this is a lot to process. I think I need like to rest for a while”,I say holding onto Jongho’s shoulders and whisper in his ear and winks at him.

“Ahhh well Emerald would like to rest now”,Jongho says to Poseidon.

“No problem but I will be back soon. I bid you all goodbye until next time”,Poseidon says and disappears into the ocean.

“So shall I start making dinner as you rest?”, Violet says winking at me.

I smile at her. I swear she can read my mind like a telepath.

“Sounds great. I will be in my chambers and no one disturb me for the next 2 hours”, I say pulling Jongho with me.

“Yes Captain”,Everyone says laughing.

Jongho’s POV

Well I can see that she is very stressed out. Hmmm maybe I should help her relax a bit. She pulls me into her room and locks the dooe behind her. Hmm.. getting naughty is she now?

“Oh so you are locking doors now huh?Very Kinky of you, captain”, I say as I put my hands on her waist and kiss up and down her neck.

“Well considering that, I have been told I am a goddess of the sea. I feel really stressed out”, She says moaning at my touch.

“I see why you are so beautiful but even if you were not a goddess, you wil always be so beautiful. Especially your skin. I do love chocolate a lot you know?”, I say moving her hair to the other side exposing her neck even more.

“Jong-Jongho. Please don’t tease me”, She moans as he stutters between moans.

“Anything for you Captain”, I say as I sit on the bed.

Emerald’s POV

“Em... come here." I hear Jongho's voice call out to me softly, my body responding almost automatically.

His form is relaxed as he sits on my bed, his gentle eyes meeting mine, although a slight darkness seems to flicker in his irises. His arms wrap around my waist when I seat myself on his lap.

"Jong, what-" He interrupts me with a finger on my lips, quickly replacing it with his own lips in response to the mildly confused look I give him.

I practically melt into his embrace, my eyes falling closed as he deepens the kiss and I allow him to slip his tongue into my mouth while his hands move to rest on my hips. I whimper quietly against Jongho's lips, hardly noticing that I started grinding against him while the kiss grows heated, and I pull away briefly to speak, but he shushes me with a shake of his head before I even say anything.

"I'm helping you de-stress," he whispers

"Just let me take the lead." I barely manage to nod before he crashes his lips to mine again, my fingers fiddling with the hem of his shirt.

I suddenly hear a quiet noise on deck, not paying it any mind until it sounds again, louder this time, and I break away to glance at the door.

“Hmm someone better not have dropped my glass kitchenware on the floor?!”, I yell running up the stairs to the deck.

“What the heck is going on?-”, I say and I see 2 people on my deck, next to Poseidon.

“Umm- what is this? Who are they?”, I ask Poseidon walking towards him and the 2 strangers.

“They are Mer-Warriors. Part of my Aquatic Army. They are here to train you in controlling your water manipulation and how to use a trident properly”, He says.

I see 2 women standing before me. They have unique eye colors and simmering skin that glows in the light. They both kneel down and bow to me saying “Your majesty”

“Umm how do they know of her?”, Yeosang asks confused.

“Well i forgot to mention this too. You are a prophecy that we all have waited to come about. All of the sea has been waiting for you, my dear.”

I look at them wide eyes. Why me? How could I be able to control the sea? What is the big picture about my father? I don’t understand...

Author’s Note: Hello Everyone! Hi! Hi! I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. More will come soon hehe. I would like to give 2 shout outs to 2 friends who collaborated and helped some ideas in this chapter. @hanatiny wrote the amazing makeout scene between my character, Emerald and Jongho. She is so sweet. Thank you! @ceopjy me with the idea of Jongho’s abs being exposed when he get splashed with water. Her ideas and mine are always in Sync sometimes hehe. I love ya’ll. Please check out their writings too! I have such amazing friends here! Look out for the next chapter.

Taglist: check out these amazing Ateez Blogs aka my friends hehe- @yun-reads @yunhoiseyecandy @ateez-angel @multidreams-and-desires @moongaera @twancingyunhoe @hanatiny @hongjoong-a-holic

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lizzybeth1986 · 5 years

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Quick Thoughts on The Royal Fast-Track Pregnancy, Book 1 Chapter 15

• A friend of mine just called me Cassandra recently coz when I predict things, not a lot of people take what I say seriously, and by the time they find out I'm right it's too late.

• I have just one thing to say there:

• If you don't want to see these posts on your dash, here are the tags to block: #trh quick thoughts, #trh qts, #trh qt reblogs, #long post.

• Title: Apple in the Oven

Alternative Title: ...Will Be Burned to A Crisp From The Speed At Which You're Trying to Bake It!

• Screenshots:

Hana: The Abhirio YouTube channel and the Universal Studio 77 YouTube channel.

Maxwell: @itsbrindleybinch and the rash rec YouTube channel

Drake: @thefirstcourtesan and the HIMEME YouTube channel.

• I liked parts of this chapter - the MC definitely seems to show a bit of the concern and caring towards her certain LIs that has been missing for a while now. I liked that she could try to talk to Liam about how he's feeling as his wife + friend, and that as Hana's wife she could encourage Hana to take a step back and bask in the attention for once. But I'm wary too. Like, is this just a small carrot they're dangling in front of us, before returning to the status quo and continuing to perpetuate the same problems in their writing?? It certainly wouldn't be the first time I've seen tiny glimpses of progress before the team took 50 steps backwards in their storytelling for some of these characters.

• How the heck did Edenbrook get a branch in Cordonia? 🤭

• Also...it's plausible that Brad/Thad/Chad may have reached there and settled in before we made it to the hospital...but still, Olivia didn't notice anything suspicious? Nothing at all? Why is it that the moment competent individuals (like Mara) become security detail, they become as stupid as the people they're protecting?

• So within our own playthroughs we have 3 people to choose from: our LIs, ourselves, or Olivia:

I like how this incorporates all their ways of thinking into how they fight.

Liam has the ability to fight a man but also the wisdom to know when delegating will make things more effective.

Hana's is reminiscient of her fight at the boutique (if she was part of your bridal party), where she had the forethought and flexibility to use anything that was at hand as a weapon (and here, she uses a potted plant).

Maxwell is someone who enjoys sliding down the stairs via the bannister (his last scene in Book 1 features him and the MC do this together), and he uses that to gain leverage over his opponent.

Drake opts for speed and aggression, since raw power is what he is most known for.

Olivia is a master of fighting skill and agility, which is obvious from her tackling of the man.

Of course...the "opponent" is really a dudebro reporter who was easy to catch so I doubt any of them saw him as that big of a challenge 🤣

• The MC then gets to choose how to tackle him - two of the options involve coming down heavily on him for invading their privacy, and one offers to provide him a picture that's taken with the consent of the MC and LI.

• Why do none of them even bother to grill this guy over where he came from? Who sent him? Who he was reporting to? Why is NO ONE asking these questions oh gosh why are you all so stupid.

• DIAMOND SCENE TIME. In some ways it could be a throwback to Liam giving you a massage in Book 1 Chapter 16 at Beaumont estate, but like all LI scenes, it plays out differently depending on who you're married to.

Liam: The MC is surprised that Liam managed to secretly set this (the arrangements for the massage) up, and Liam confesses to taking a course from a professional masseuse (wasn't he already very skilled in massage? I recall the MC saying so in TRR Book 1 Chapter 16. I mean it's likely he wanted to sharpen his skills etc but why no acknowledgement from the MCs who did the scene back at Beaumont House?). You get to choose between letting him focus on your upper body or lower body, and you can either flirt with or help Liam to set up.

The variations for the sex scene involve the MC telling him what she wants in terms of speed and tempo (slow, or "right now"), as well as positioning (under her, or on top of her). The couple then relax and speak of how moments like these will be few and far between once the child is born, and how they will make time for their children and each other regardless. If you're a Henney fan, you'll love this scene coz at some point the MC calls Liam "Mr Perfect".

Cmon PB tell me that wasn't done on purpose! 🤣🤣🤣

Hana: There's plenty of Hana's thoroughness in action here. The skill is something Hana has already learned and picked up from before, and it's something she is excellent at (for instance, there is a point where she tells the MC that she almost put her course instructor to sleep with her rendition of a Swedish massage). Hana's version of the scene is detailed in terms of the oils she uses and the names of the massage therapies she employs.

We get a choice between two oils - elderberry and rose, or sage and sandalwood - and two massage therapies: Swedish and Shiatsu. The first therapy is meant to soothe and relax, the second is meant to invigorate and awaken. The MC can either respond by talking about how much she needed this, or jokingly offer to be "Hana's personal genie".

The MC also gets to set the pace for sex - either hard and fast or slow and tender - and the scene shortly after involves the women engaging in playful banter about how there will be less time for private moments like these after they have children, but how it will all be worth it for the joy those very children bring.

(Also the one time I went to France I saw the sun set at 9 PM or something to my utter surprise 😲)

Maxwell: The tone of this - including the MC's as well as Maxwell's dialogues - sound a lot like the fun couple they're expected to be, and have a different vibe. I liked this scene particularly because the MC gets to show her mood swings here, and Maxwell has a story similar as Liam's about taking a course on massage ("with a complimentary chakra kit"). Additionally he also provides his own recorded music.

The MC gets to choose how they'll do foreplay ("my mouth on you" or "your mouth on me"), and how they'll have sex (behind or under). Once that is done, they speak about their wishes and dreams for the child. Maxwell mentions needing to lock the door so the kids won't hear them during moments like these, and contemplating on their growing years (he mentions "preschool" then jumps straight to "first car"). They do, however, agree to relax and take each moment as it comes. Which is a theme with Maxwell even in the buildup of the scene where he talks about living in the here and now.

Drake: More attempts to make Drake more flexible and open, and less "manly man" stuff. He gives the MC the opportunity to choose who should "order around" even though he isn't used to it (at least they acknowledged that). He doesn't say a lot about his massaging skill - and he shouldn't considering the writers already write enough about it in their Chapter 13 scene where he talks about his dad playing masseuse for his mother.

The MC gets to decide whether Drake can watch or touch, and positions (on top, or under). Afterwards, Drake gets to talk about how far they have come as a couple - how the MC didn't imagine how her life in NY led her to this charmed one, and how Drake could hardly imagine until she chose him that he was the one she wanted. While all the others speak about the changes that having children will bring into their lives, Drake gets to also talk about how unbelievably good their present life is.

• The next few weeks pass in a blur. Another couple of days pass in a blur. A whole six months is reduced to a montage wowwww. Amazing. What was the premise of this book again?? Family, right? And surprisingly, we spent AGES on only one LI's family, so much so that the rest of us have to be satisfied with just 5 chapters of the theme for our own LIs!

• Your free dress is basically a peach monstrosity (sorry guys I can't stand the colour peach 😅😅), and the diamond option is a floral blue short dress, which is fitting considering our next diamond option involves an actual flower garden. It would go with the theme.

• Our second trimester montage includes the following:

- Maxwell googling pregnancy-friendly yoga poses and learning them so he can practice them with us. For solidarity awww (which could be either as a friend, or as the father. Both are adorable). He teaches us the downward dog pose (we call it adho mukha svanasana I think. It's supposed to have many benefits, though I hear that earlier, pregnant people used to be advised against doing this asana during late term).

- Drake making something that was supposed to be a rocking horse but that looks either like a footstool or abstract art, further reiterating that if he has so few skills maybe he shouldn't be yapping about how nobles swan around doing nothing of importance.

- Liam doing the rounds of our estate with us, and proposing the lakeside be converted into a garden with a gazebo...kiiinda similar to Applewood's? The narrative promises that paying for this background art will unlock scenes not only in this book but in other books in the series as well.

- Hana suggesting names for our kid - either Oswald, Valentina or as our namesake. Valentina is the popular option, obviously, because Hana then gets to give us a callback to TCaTF where she can speak of the "great warrior" who was close to Cordonia's greatest warrior queen. This comes MUCH later in the scheme of these scenes, and if you're a Hana fan who doesn't romance Hana...it'll definitely feel like you spent a huge chunk of the chapter not even catching a glimpse of her.

- In addition, you get two scenes exclusively with our LIs - one where we're dancing with our partners and experience the baby's kick together for the first time (it's cute because the sprite wiggle and shake a couple times from surprise and joy in this scene 🤭), and this adorable af dream section:

Now this scene takes place while the MC worries over the number of kicks in two hours that her character should be doing, and the LI is in the middle of a dream when she wakes them up. It's followed by the LIs calming her down and attempting to communicate with the child before they eventually kick. The dreams are cute, but I couldn't help but notice how all of them are in some way connected to themes of family (and perhaps responsibility? IDK this is just a wild guess):

* King Liam and the Baklava Arm: Liam's dream involves him and Leo (they remember Liam's brother exists! Hallelujah!) eating baklava, before Liam turns into this sweet and gets eaten by his older brother. Which I take to mean that sometimes, it really does feel like the responsibilities Leo - and why just Leo! I would include Liam's father in this as well - has left behind for him may swallow Liam whole. After all, Liam is in many ways, spending his time as king constantly fixing his family's messes.

* Hana Lee and the Tea Party: Hana's dream focuses on enjoying a tea party with the MC and her future child, to the point where she is reluctant to shake herself out of the dream. As a child Hana was deprived of this experience - forever keeping a place for her mother that her mother never bothered to fill - that she now views the same thing as an opportunity to NOT be that person towards her own child. In a lot of ways she may view this as "I will not make the mistakes my mother made, and make my child suffer believing I don't care for them". Why is why, when the MC wakes her up she shows such a reluctance to leave. In a lot of ways her view of parenting rn is largely coloured by her desire to be the exact opposite of her mother.

* Maxwell Beaumont and The Shrimp Buffet: Maxwell's recurring dream involves him being in a shrimp buffet, being fed shrimp till he wants no more. This is a little tougher to decipher, but I'm guessing that since their house sigil is nautical and shrimps are a delicacy of the waters, the shrimp buffet mayyyybe represents his House and family, and the responsibilities and complications that will eventually pile up from them. Remember, he enjoys his father's respect and regard now, but perhaps there may come a time where being a Beaumont will feel like being in a carousel that refuses to stop.

* Drake Walker and the Giant Marshmallow: Drake's dream involves being smushed by a giant marshmallow that he seems to be fighting. Now most of us usually associate the marshmallow with Drake only, but in a lot of ways the treat has its roots in his memories of his father. In fact, that's the earliest actual memory we get of Jackson. So the dream could either mean he fears he may not live up to Jackson's example, or foreshadowing that Jackson's secret may blindside and engulf him.

• One thing I really don't get about the TRR/H team re: Hana is...why do they sometimes spend chapters and chapters repeating the same things like a broken tape recorder? In the early chapters she wound up making constant mentions of embroidery, even when it wasn't needed. When it was pointed out that they forgot she was skilled at horseriding then they kept beating that reference to death. Now it's tea parties. Hana is a layered character, PB! Start treating her like one!!

• It's nice that the MC has that rare moment of checking in on Liam and asking him how he's taking the news that his mother was pregnant when she died. That doesn't happen much in the books - she can ask a ten-second question about how Liam is holding up after his father died but somehow never tries to check up on how he's down again, even when she's his wife. It would be nice to see more of that...but I don't have any hope left of that happening.

• Hallelujah! The members of the Council speak about something other than balls and parties!! There's a brief mention about "transportation reforms" which gets knocked over by the press in favour of more pregnancy speculations. Which is on par for pregnant celebs - in that once you're pregnant, everything else seems frustratingly unimportant in comparison in the eyes of other people. You begin to feel less like a person and more like a vessel (and if you don't have the right support, those feelings will keep gnawing at you even after childbirth).

• I wanted to hear more about those transportation reforms! Dammit PB!!

• The MC and LI eventually celebrate the point where her morning sickness is out of the way in a short scene.

• Man I miss seeing the palace. It felt almost like the team had forgotten that some of our MCs might actually live there.

• Callback to Book 1! We get a scene where the friends are having dinner, but the MC now has a craving for cronuts so they go to the same bakery they visited when she was still new to Cordonia.

- Jumping out the window was Liam's thing in Book 1 (and he almost fell on the rose bushes), but this time it's the MC who is doing it

- Maxwell speaks about how fun rule breaking is, leading to an interesting observation from Hana (the last time they went to a cronut shop she sidestepped this question and merely commented on how much more fun it was that their destination was "something delicious"). This time around, Hana actually focuses on the "rule breaking part", where she speaks about what it feels like to break a rule for her:

I've mentioned in my QT for Chapter 9 how Hana often speaks of her parents "as if they are still there, still controlling her choices, as if she cannot remove herself from her fears concerning them even if they're physically away from her. In her head, she still has a lot of difficult getting out of the obedience mindset (particularly towards her parents) built in her.

I can connect to this personally. As a teenager and a young adult, I wasn't allowed to go out too often, and the few times I did go out to meet friends I was given deadlines that left me with very little time to actually have much fun. (yknow, like 6 pm, or 7.30 if I was lucky...even if I'd gone out at 4 or 5). My college days were mostly spent in convent-run hostels with strict curfews (like 6 pm), and you had to repeatedly hit at a locked gate if you were even a minute late.

Now I'm married, to a man who understands if I run late...and even now I think in terms of timing and curfews. I still get a tiny chill down my spine when it's 10 pm and I'm not home yet - for no other reason than "I'm late". It's just the way my brain's been wired from years of that routine and it will probably take a lot of unlearning to grow out of it.

Hana's guilt about rule-breaking is kind of like that. She knows it's unreasonable, she knows theoretically that she is safe from harm, she knows logically that she's free to do what she wants, but her brain has been wired to certain routines that will take her maybe years to grow out of.

...and this fandom acts as if she's just a weak, passive, one-dimensional character who is nothing next to the Almighty Olivia Nevrakis. LMAO.

- A lot of the callbacks are in the shop scene, such as the way Maxwell shouts for the cronuts as soon as they enter, the way Maxwell finishes his cronut before the other LIs finish their countdowns, and the compliments they deliver for the treat hold a few similarities too.

- There is also a tiny callback when Maxwell recalls Liam and Drake "stealing a boat" - something Liam talked to us about at the Regatta.

- If there is anything different, it's the messages the LIs now deliver to the child:

The friendly version includes all their plans for this child they have already begun to love and consider as their family, and involves what is important to all of them. Hana simply lets the child know there is an amazing support system that will shower them with love, Maxwell playfully asks the child about what flavour of cronuts they would prefer, Drake promises them fishing and trekking trips just like the ones he had as a child, and Liam assures them that even though their future lies in the throne, they are not entirely bound by it (why couldn't the writers have made the heir an "heir presumptive" then? Rather than make this a permanent arrangement! Oh, I know. Coz the MC has to be the front and center of everything).

• Slight variations if the LI is married to you:

Le Moi:

• It's now time for our baby shower, which means we're now in our third trimester. So much for a book about having a child 🙄

• One of my favourite variations in this chapter happens around here. If she is your friend, Hana is organizing the baby shower along with the other women in court, and the MC tells her she should enjoy it with her and she doesn't need to fuss so much, and Hana responds that the MC is her best friend so it's important for her to be involved.

Fortunately, in Hana's playthrough, the MC ensures (and insists, actually) Hana enjoys the function alongside her, rather than playing second-fiddle:

It's a lovely scene. It's all I could want. The MC shows that she cares about Hana, follows up on the "I won't let you play second fiddle when you're my wife" promise from last chapter, and generally includes rather than excludes Hana. It's heartwarming and shows some effort from the side of the writers.

But...at this point it's been FOUR BOOKS. Four books of seeing the MC simply use Hana when convenient and discard her when convenient. Four books of seeing the MC not bother to even ask Hana how she is when she is affected by terrible things, while showering attention and advice on people like Olivia and Penelope and Madeleine. Just a book ago, the MC marrying her was treating Hana like a bridesmaid on what should have been a memorable wedding day for Hana.

It's great that this mistake is not repeated now, but this is one tiny spark in a long, long line of lackadaisical writing. It shouldn't take you four fucking books to come to the conclusion that, hey, maybe we're treating our lone female LI like garbage and we should do better.

So...yeah, I love this scene. But I have no idea whether PB will continue doing better in terms of their treatment of Hana, or whether this and the previous scene are just brief flashes in a pan. I probably never will trust them on this, but honestly the team has only themselves to blame for that 🤷🏽‍♀

• I'm tempted to say "too little too late", but (foolishly) I'm still holding on to a sliver of hope.

• Hallelujah! The writers also remember that Kiara exists outside of being Penelope's bestie! And she comes to us and the LI, delivering the news that Auvernese and Monterisso royalty have decided to come to the baby shower to find out who Cordonia will make an alliance with. Jesus Christ. Stop.

• In my playthrough, Kiara interacts with Liam and Esther (but more to Esther than Liam - and I saw similar interactions on the plane trip back to Cordonia) which felt...different because up until now the narrative never allowed the two to even speak to each other (she's the only suitor in Book 1 who never gets to even talk to Liam, and in Book 3, they went as far as to replace her with Hakim in the armoury scene at Lythikos). To me it simply goes to show how deep the rot goes with regards to Kiara's treatment in this series (as well as the fact that they make Kiara interact just as normally with Drake in his playthrough, yknow, that asshole who treated her like shit last series. Oh what I wouldn't give for Kiara to rake that man through the coals for his treatment of her, if only just once).

• We're also told that our in-laws will be in attendance, which means we will have different playthroughs featuring different characters visiting or gaining additional dialogue. Regina and Leo for Liam's playthrough, Leona, Bianca and BertVannah for Drake's, Barthelemy and BertVannah for Maxwell's, and Xinghai and Lorelai for Hana. I think Hana's family is the only one so far who have NOT made an appearance...and will for the first since Book 3 this week. They'd better treat her well this time around!

• I'm wondering - with the arrival of the other royals - whether another flashback scene will be shown. Or perhaps it will be reserved for Chapter 17 since we'll be traveling to Lythikos.

• I wonder if one of the gifts will include something for the nursery. I think it might.

• Another visit to Lythikos. This has to be the third time I'm seeing this place. It was the only duchy besides Beaumont Estate we were allowed to see in Book 1 and one of the major turning points in the plot in Book 3. We haven't seen any duchy (besides our own) as extensively as we have seen this one, and I know it will involve more opportunities for Olivia to gobble up space.

• Like at this point why the hell am I being regarded as an honorary Beaumont when the only time I bothered to visit Ramsford was in Book 1, and I have never, ever visited Hana's Cordonian side of the family even once - not even aware of anything besides their sigil being flowers and her great-grandmother teaching her a Cordonian tradition featuring three coins in a fountain (and don't even get me started on Shanghai!!!)

• In an ideal version of this story, where the writers made a damn effort on all the LIs...I'd be really happy about the writing for Olivia. I'd be fine with it. But now I'm sick and tired. Sick and tired of her concerns, her issues, her pain getting more attention than Hana's ever has, or ever will. Sick and tired of how often I see both the writing and people in the fandom (yes Olivia stans who downplay Hana just to make your fave look good, I'm looking at you) act like Hana's story has zero value, every time the narrative gives Olivia attention. At this point the narrative is giving a secondary character the space and attention that they should have been giving the female LI. And not because Hana's story is not equally compelling - but because the writers didn't want to put in the effort. Why the hell do I have to wait four goddamn books to see even a tenth of this much effort put into Hana, huh?

I'm fed up at this point. I like Olivia but can't even enjoy her scenes nowadays without thinking of how much the same amount of space could have benefited Hana, or wondering how and when the fandom will use this opportunity to shit on Hana just because she's not their preferred female LI or BFF.

• Chapter 16 has always been the kind of chapter where the nobility have an excuse to go wild and party a lot (except in Book 2, where Chapter 16 was set aside for Liam's proposal and the MC finally choosing her endgame). In Book 1 it was the Beaumont Bash. In Book 3, it was the MC's bachelorette in Vegas. Now in Book 4, it's the baby shower (maybe less wild...but still partylike). It's kind of a pattern at this point.

• Liam's suggestion of a flower garden + gazebo at Valtoria brought me back to that Book 1 Chapter 4 scene, where he spoke about the palace gardens and hedge maze being his mother's vision. But it also reminds me of that gazebo with cherry blossoms, and that flower conservatory, in Applewood.

There is a statue of a woman with a crown on her head and a specter in her hands, at the back of the garden, and I wonder who that is supposed to represent.

• That's it for this week! Until Chapter 16, guys! (gosh how did I survive 15 chapters worth of meta with this).

#long post #trh quick thoughts #trh qts #the royal heir #king liam #hana lee #maxwell beaumont #drake walker

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kaoarika · 4 years

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I rarely do written posts in Tumblr anymore because I am still figuring out how this new UI works in general (and there might be still be some bugs about writing posts + leaving them on drafts + publishing them accidentally as well), and tbh, between the past two months have been sorta chaotic and very mentally draining (besides some work I have been doing) and me attempting to think around some of my few active fandoms... well, haven’t had an eureka moment where I sit and write what I think about stuff.

So, let’s talk about some “stuff”.

Some days ago, I accidentally noticed by PURE CHANCE that some of the completed webtoons I was going to “eventually read” in LINE were going to get “locked”/converted for Daily Pass. I mean, tbf, I knew that they were going to stick to this plan since past October, but it seems they really went full force this month (they only “locked” like a couple of series back then). And it’s exactly how I thought they would do so - popular series that have been already completed, old and recent.

I’m not going to complain about “Daily Pass” because I do have some thoughts about that and the fact they could use another model than just readers farming/buying coins, but, what do you do, especially since lots of these series are PRETTY long (140+ chapters long)?

My complaint does come from that, as a web user, I found this by pure chance, despite them saying they would announce what series would be locked in a 30-day advance notice. Because there’s no apparent indicator in the main page about THIS (The only Notice/News detail you see down below the page is about Canvas creators). Heck, I don’t think they even tell you about it in their mail newsletter, which kinda suck :))).

So, anyway.

I checked and, yes, a couple of VERY old series I was interested in reading were/are going to get locked. Problem, like I mentioned? THEY are pretty long! I know I can binge read as much as I want, but I cannot make miracles like reading over 100 chapters (if one series, try thinking about 2 or 3 - I WAS NOT GOING TO DO THIS) in less than 12 hours! ESPECIALLY if those series were going to get locked THIS WEEK.

FML.

...anyway crisis was averted when I had to let go some interesting series that I may would get my way to read them (if there is a new buying/rental model they would apply) in the future... BUT I did read stuff I was curious or wanted to read... and mainly old stuff that I was willing to eventually finish one day.

Opinions on those series?

Okay, as brief and spoiler free as possible:

Untouchable: A story about modern-day vampires that instead of drinking blood, they have evolved to absorb the energy of their preys. This one is a romantic series about Sia, a vampire model and this human guy who has a very deep microphobia, and she puts her eyes on him when she realizes that his energy is like none she has tasted before. But, again, dude has microphobia (that is more or less controlled as time goes on).

I stopped reading this one for a while because I was sorta smelling love triangle from a jealous friend of hers that OBVIOUSLY didn’t want to be looked as “just a friend”, lol. Like “how would this get solved”, kind of thing in your typical romance stuff. But then, last week I retook it... and it wasn’t as bad... but it leaks typical shoujo stuff/problems that become a newer obstacle as time goes on and on (misscomunication, lack of trust, overprotective family ANNOYINGLY hurting their own offspring, sudden deux ex machina...?). So, I think it finished fine... But man, I was so pissed off in how some stuff was managed at the end, lmao. Especially the way a “villain” was redeemed? I know that they say “karma is a b*tch”, but, DUDE KILLED PEOPLE BEFORE!? and you redeem him in a “lol, you will find out how love will make you feel” LIKe, DUDE, WHAT THE HELL. DON’T REDEEM HIM LIKE THAT.

Ghost Wife: I started reading this series in an unofficial manner a long while ago, but I supposed that the first chapters are pretty slow and it didn’t catch me on in the first place. It’s about a girl that starts seeing ghosts/spirits, and there’s this one that becomes WAY too attached to her, that offers her two options: either been eaten/killed or agreeing to be his wife. Given the title of thise series, you might wonder she accepted the second one

My lesson? Should have kept reading. The story picks up when other ghostly creatures are introduced and they start interacting with the main female character and her “ghost husband”, especially since this ghost cannot really imitate human interaction and his solution is “hypnotizing” everyone so he can “normally” fit. And the interaction between those two becomes more gracious and natural. You can feel that she likes being with him, despite the dangers of attracting ghosts that might kill her and all that. Heh.

Other lesson I had is that: the artist isn’t EXACTLY well into action scenes and some other details (but their ghostly creatures’ designs are TERRIFYING), so, I thought “well, I know there are other artists like this in the webcomic/webtoon environment, I shouldnt be too worried about my art once I get done with mine, right?

Also, some details started to make sense later on. And I cried like a baby in some moments, as well. Don’t have too many complaints, though. Perhaps more obvious “falling in love” moments... but then I realized that some actions speak lots better than words.

About Death: And speaking of “crying like a baby”, this one. This is a very old work, and it’s a gem, and it’s short, to top! And HECK, the art was AMAZING. Very touchy, and it makes you think. There’s quite a lot of South Korean webtoons that have made me cry because... they really make you think a LOT about stuff... especially about life and death.

Oh! Holy: Story about a shy and lonely loveable dork that is in love of his childhood friend, and that they eventually find each other in high school. Said childhood friend is idolized in school (but she is... hmmm... a dork as, well). Oh, he sees ghosts. OH, and she dies within the first three chapters accidentally :3. Shenanigans happen.

I HAD A LOT OF FUN WITH THIS ONE. SURE, it’s another shoujo but WAY less dramatic than Untouchable, because this was comedy (so, a rom-com!). And this one made me want more and more to read it. The characters all had an amazing personality, chemistry and their interactions were FUN AS HELL. The author seems to have my my sense of (dumb) humor, and the art was too attractive and knew where it should bright.

I don’t think I have too many complaints about this one. I may have felt unsatisfied in some minor stuff, but everything else felt “okay” to me, in general.

A couple of things, though: localization and some quality stuff relating to translation in this series. I cannot judge the translation, but I do think it could have handled more quality checking on this one or proofreading, I’m not sure. I know that these (licensed and translated) series come in a weekly basis, but they REALLY need to pay more $$$ to their own staff to not let this stuff happen THAT frequent.

Localization is a bit of an issue I do HAVE though, and it is the same as in “Ghost Wife” and some other recent Korean series they have licensed in the recent past: Why using English-localized names, though? SURE, they retain their original last Korean names... but... why don’t keep their FULL NAMES, I wonder? I mean, weren’t we supposed to be over that kind of stuff already (videogames, JPN anime, manga other foregin stuff)? Is it because marketability? And/or because some names are “puns” that couldn’t easily be translateable in other languages?

If it’s the latter, I think the same is applied in other regional language localization, like, in Spanish, original English language “Axed” is called “Natacha la del Hacha” and you cannot wonder how it crawls over my skin. I know this series is BUILT ON and is full of puns (as I am following it)... but... “Axelia” is a much more cooler name than “Natacha”... :I or so I THINK? Don’t take me too seriously...

In “Ghost Wife” I get it, you have spiritual creatures... their “human” names are puns of what they really are, and these words MAYBE don’t have too much meaning in English or Spanish or whatever... but... its a bit... glaring... when the main cast has English first names... and then you have a side character called... I dunno, “Soyeon” :I. or Haetae (a creature that didn’t have a human character name...) or, heck, characters that never appear again like... there was this “Damien” dude that for some reason, his name is slipped a couple of times as “Suho” (I wonder, his original name). But, then, you have people named “Liz”, “Drake”, “Sarah”, “Nathan” ????

I suppose that in “Oh! Holy” that might be the case, too. The original Korean name of the series is “오!주예수여” that is translated as “Oh! Lord Jesus”, because Holy in Korean is named “Yesu”. And, *sigh* I think that says enough. The pun STILL works... but :’))

But at the same time, I think my thing with the English localized names in “Oh! Holy” is that they are... blatantly boring and I don’t think they fit their faces. At all. But, maybe that’s me? (I mean, the “ultimate” reaper is called Norman. NORMAN.) Like I said, they still keep their original Korean last names... but... ugh.

(this is coming from someone who gave two of her characters very not obvious Spanish names given that they are Mexican, but I do have some valid cultural and VERY obvious explanations about those...)

Also - I don’t get LINE Webtoon’s selectiveness in this localization decision. Some of the South Korean series they bring, they do KEEP their original full names (see “A Good Day to be a Dog”, “Ghost Teller”, heck, the afforementioned “Untouchable”), but then you have stuff like “Oh! Holy”, “Ghost Wife”, “Scorching Romance”, “Mom, I’m Sorry!” or “Lookism”... ?????

And, this is very blatant annoying because a) K-Pop is HUGELY global mainstream nowadays and you can hear/read fans screaming their NAMES?! And 2) K-dramas are also pretty popular these days???

??????

*LONG SIGH*

There’s a few series that I want to check out, but I still have some more days for that to happen (heck, even a bit of more than a week). But, it SURE DOES suck that most of the interesting series I had my eyes on all were going to get locked this WEEK. :))))

#kao's ramblings #kao's nonsenses #webtoons

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adoubleshotdepresso · 4 years

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And so it began.

I saw the light, and decided to be born. Not really, but I assume that’s how it goes.

hi, hello, my name is Em. There’s a few more letters to the name, but all my friends call me Em, so I thought it was appropriate to introduce myself as that, to you, the reader, whoever you are and wherever the hell you may be.

I was born in 1993, in Busan, South Korea. And that’s basically all I know regarding where I’m from. I was put up for adoption, and my parents adopted me when I was 12 weeks old. I don’t really have much to say about my time abroad, mostly because I was an infant and don’t remember, but also because it doesn’t make me who I am, and has not had any influence on who I am today.

So, adoption hey. You’d be surprised how many people you know are actually adopted. I know a handful myself, and I think it’s a pretty amazing thing. The first question I always come across is; “Do you think you’ll ever want to go back?” And “do you miss or want to find your biological parents?”. And look, depending on the day and how I’m feeling, the answers may vary. Slightly. But realistically, the answer is absolutely not. I have the best family anyone could ever imagine, and my parents are my best friends. I have an older sister who was also adopted from South Korea, Seoul. She’s 6 years my senior and is also one of my best friends.

My family is tight, yo. And we’ve always been that way. My mum is the most dedicated person you will ever meet. She puts her heart and soul into absolutely everything she does. I might be completely biased here, but I’ve never met someone who loves her family so fiercely and would do absolutely everything possible to make sure we are happy and well. She’s always the first person I call when I feel myself go under. She’s a pretty great woman. I know I can always count on her to be there for me and my family no matter what, and one day I hope to repay everything she’s given to me.

I’m so lucky to have a father like mine. He has always supported my decisions and even though some of them have been dumb, he’s never judged me for them. I mean, I get the whole “I told you so” every now and then, but that’s understandable. When I first started having issues with my mental health, dad didn’t really understand what I was going through, as he never really grew up with it nor had any involvement in the area either. But as I got older he really made an effort to understand me more, and ended up being my biggest support beam in my adult life. He’s the sort of person who tells you “I’m just a message away” and actually means it. At my lowest times, it’s nice to know he’s always got my back.

I have one sibling, my oldest sister, who is YOU GUESSED IT, one of my best friends. Our relationship has not always been easy, and there have been times when we wanted to rip each others eyeballs out, but now we’re both a bit older and understand each other better, we couldn’t be closer than we are now. She moved overseas for a while, met the love of her life and married him while still living in America. I went over there a couple of times to visit her, and to be a part of her special day, She’s been back home for a couple of years now, and though we don’t see each other frequently, I know I can talk to her about my struggles too. She’s had her fair share of mental problems, and she still gets through every day, and for that, she’s my god damn hero.

Now we’ve gotten the introductions out of the way, lets get into it. My childhood was pretty normal to be honest. My parents both had stable jobs, weren’t addicts or assholes whatsoever, so we always had food, hot water and a sweet bed to sleep in. Between my parents and their parents, we always had somewhere to go and never had to use babysitters or after school care, which is pretty extraordinary.

Primary school was whatever. And that’s about it. Girls are assholes, and boys were the most fascinating thing in the world. It was average, nothing that bad happened, and nothing spectacular happened either. But shit got real when high school started. For the first year of high school I attended a fancy private all girls here in town, and that was honestly the worst. Not the worst of my life, but for “back then” Em, it was pretty damn bad. I dealt with the usually bullying thing, and I think that’s when all my problems started. Which is kind of crazy because I was probably only about 13 years old when I started to develop depression and anxiety disorders.

Not only did I lose trust in my “friends and peers”, I also lost faith in the teachers and the other adults who were supposed to be there for their students, and to protect them while on school grounds. Well, what a load of shit that was. After holding out for a year, my parents finally agreed I needed to move schools. I was accepted into another private school, but this time it was a co-ed school, and much smaller in size. All in all, it was a pretty good school, but unfortunately I was a very had teenager to please, and hated every single second I had to be there

I started skipping school, chucking sickies every week and avoiding homework, study and assignments. I found it very hard to concentrate, and because of the first year of high school education for myself was an absolute damn nightmare, I had zero interest in my education. I started smoking cigarettes and nicotine at some point in this time, and found it hilarious to drink until I vomited on myself. Looking back now, I should have realised it was something more than adolescent behaviour problems, but what kid goes, “wow, I’m extra cranky today, I must have clinical depression!”. So I kept on being an asshole to everyone around me, not caring about my studies and doing whatever the heck I wanted to do, which included going to parties, seeing boys and lying to my parents. I would tell them I’d be staying with a friend, but lets be real, I was really at a party, getting hammered and kissing lots of boys.

So, high school eventually came to an end. It felt like it was going for an eternity, but I look back now and I wonder where the time had gone. And I think that’s when I realised I was having some real mental health problems. I had a full time job at a chemist, and stayed there for many years, 10 to be exact. I loved my job for a very long time, and stayed there up until a couple of years ago. I don’t think it helped my mental stability, and close to where I resigned, I felt myself crying and having panic attacks in the back room of my work place. I wanted to call in sick every day, rather than go into work and have to face customers and certain staff. I wouldn’t blame work for what happened to me in the end, but I’m sure it didn’t really help either.

That brings us the last few years of my life. And did SHIT GET REAL, my friend. I’ve had the worst days of my life, but have also experienced some of the best. Some of the worst you say? How much time do you have? There’s been a few doozies, that’s for sure. I was in a relationship that started off beautiful, but ended up being the absolute downfall of my mental stability. So many things contributed to my depression, but I dare say the break up, and the loss of my grandmother definitely was the icing on the cake.

I’m not going to point fingers and blame someone else for what happened, but okay I am. The break up I experienced was enough for me to want to die. Literally. My grandma who I was very close with was dying, and my ex didn’t really care. We used to fight all the time, even at the beginning of our relationship, but it only got worse. And even evenB when I thought it wouldn’t get worse, it definitely did. I started drinking a lot, and abusing prescription medication, Valium mostly, but also some sleeping medication too. One day, I was feeling very low, and begged my ex to come back home. I told him every 10 minutes he didn’t respond to my calls or text, I’d take another pill. And I did. I also felt like it was necessary to extinguish cigarettes on myself. The physical pains of the burn was a welcoming distraction to the storm raging inside my head.

After that, it was all a blur. I overdosed a couple of times, some I was able to manage myself, but two more times to come I would need medical attention. The first time I was hospitalised, I called a bunch of friends for help because I thought I was about to die. I don’t remember making the call, and I hardly remember leaving my home in ambulance. Once I gained consciousness again, I was forced to go see a therapist even when I declined. And let’s just say, therapy is not my thing. I have tried again and again to go, and to find that connection with a therapist but never really got remotely close enough to ever trusting one.

The last few years have definitely had its up and downs. I bought a house a few years ago, the house my grandparents owned when I was growing up, and not long after I moved in, I met my parter. I had known him for a couple of years before we started seeing each other, and not long after that, I asked him to move in. It was only a few months into our relationship, but it felt right. You know when you know and I can’t really explain much more than that.

I’m not going to sit here and lie to you and say everything gets easier when you’re older, and your problems you experienced before seem to fade away, I’m here to tell you the truth what it’s like to live with a severe depressive and anxiety disorder. Not every day is easy, and sometimes, the bad days feel like they’re never going to end. It’s easy for some people to hop online, and talk about how easy it was to get out of their own heads, and all you have to do is look on the bright side of life.

Because no. It’s never as golden as what influencers try and tell you, and it’s definitely not as glamorous as you see and read online. Some of the worst days I have experienced have made me feel like there is no possible way out. So, hold onto your seatbelts, and grab your Kleenex, because shit is about to get real.

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catsafarithewriter · 5 years

Text

Day 3: Angels and Demons

A/N: Oh grimm, I’m behind schedule. Oops? Anyway, please enjoy!

Toto had tried the distant guardian angel approach for nearly two millennia before deciding it wasn’t for him.

He appreciated the logic. After all, mortals had such brief lifespans that it was foolish to get too close - and guardian angels got plenty close given their innate bond with their mortal-of-the-generation. But, after centuries of watching from afar, he had received a most unusual mortal.

“Yer gonna get in trouble for it,” Muta said.

“With who?” Toto asked. He sat atop the museum rooftop, watching people scurry from one fleeting moment to the next, a half-ghost amid the city’s smog. “There’s no actual rule saying we can’t meet our mortal. In fact,” he continued, a smidgen too smugly to be simply pointing out fact, “the occasional interaction is encouraged. Give them a little nudge in the right direction and all.”

“Yeah, emphasis on the occasional. I’m jus’ saying, there’s a reason we keep our distance.”

“You spend almost all your time in mortal shape in the Human World,” Toto reminded his fellow guardian, a tad accusingly.

“As a cat, yeah. I never actually start a conversation with anyone.”

“Probably because you have nothing good to say.”

“Cause the world just ain’t ready for me yet.”

Toto snorted, but didn’t take the bait.

They watched the world below in silence.

“I mean,” Toto continued eventually, “he’s barely mortal anyway. So it doesn’t count.”

“He’ll die one day.”

“Not for a long while yet. Not within a human lifespan.”

“Maybe.”

Toto cast his gaze across at the other angel. “You’re just a ray of sunshine, anyone ever tell you that?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Another silence passed. This time it was Muta who broke it.

“So yer all set then? Yer really gonna meet him?”

“I think so.”

“How’s that even gonna go? Are ya just gonna be like, hey, I’m yer guardian angel, be not afraid?”

“Give me a little credit. I’ll introduce myself as a creature like him. A Creation. That should bypass any questions about my own long lifespan.”

“Oh, lying. Are ya sure that’s allowed?”

“Well, if I don’t burst into blasphemous flames, I’ll assume so.”

“Yer picked a mortal shape yet?”

“I don’t know.” Toto watched the dimming horizon, the silhouettes of seagulls stark against the rosy sky. “I’m thinking something with wings. Something unremarkable. A corvid, maybe.”

“I always knew you had a birdbrain.”

“Very funny.”

Muta caught Toto’s eye, and the smile wasn’t entirely sure. “Jus’, ya know, don’t get too attached. Even Creations can die.”

Toto grinned. “He’s practically immortal. Unless he’s stupid, he’ll be around for a good long while yet.”

“So. How’s the fake-immortal?”

“Stupid.”

Muta chortled. “Told ya it was a mistake.”

“It’s not a mistake,” Toto retorted. He shuffled his wings - the mortal bird form was still taking some getting used to, even now - and tried to look unruffled. “I’m making far more progress working alongside him than I would watching from afar. It’s just...” He cawed in disgruntlement and tried again. “It’s just he keeps running into stupid situations.”

“So he thinks he’s immortal. Got it.”

“No, it’s not that, it’s...” And Toto struggled to pin down exactly what kind of mental pathways went on in his charge’s head. “Well, maybe partly, but... he’s just very bad at making plans that work. And sticking to them. And aren’t needlessly dramatic. He somehow ended up trapped in a dog kennel last week while trying to find a little girl’s lost toy. I had to fly in to get him out.”

Muta grunted. “Oh yeah, you got that Bureau thing happening. How’s it going?”

“It’s... doing its job.”

“Which is?”

“It gives him a purpose.” Toto was silent for a moment, and for once Muta didn’t take the opportunity to butt in. “You and I have each other, but Creations are so rare that if I wasn’t there, he’d be alone. The Bureau gives him... something. Not that we get many clients, but... it’s a start. It helps.”

“Yeah,” Muta grunted. He sounded like he had thoughts on his mind, and Toto would have teased him for it, but something stayed his beak this time. “So the Bureau helps people out, right?”

“Yes...?”

Muta took another moment to think. “Yer want to help out my human?”

Muta never intended it to become a regular thing. But the years passed and he watched over multiple mortals while Toto remained by the Creation’s side, and somewhere along the way, Muta ended up ferrying more than just his own contemporary human to the Sanctuary’s doors.

Sometimes it was for big things. For when the magical world spilled over onto humanity and some poor human ended up way in over their head. For people who really didn’t have anywhere else to go but to turn to a strange little Bureau populated by talking cats and crows.

But sometimes, when the Bureau had had few guests and fewer clients, and Toto worried over his mortal charge, littler problems would find their way to the Bureau’s doorstep. Things that wouldn’t matter in the long run, that didn’t need magic to solve. But Muta led them to the Sanctuary anyway.

So when his current human - a teen girl, young and awkward and far too reckless for a mortal body - found herself engaged to a Cat Prince against all her wishes, he knew just where to take her.

He did not, however, expect her - years later - to return.

Or to stay.

Or to complicate matters.

Muta was sitting outside the Bureau when Toto returned to the Sanctuary.

“We have a problem.”

Muta barely looked over his newspaper. “He’s your mortal, your problem.”

“It’s not-- well,” Toto amended, “it’s not just him.” He nodded towards the Bureau’s interior, where their respective charges were making tea and conversation. “It’s him and her. Both of them.”

“Yer telling me.”

Toto looked down his beak at Muta. “Don’t you pay any attention to your mortal?”

“Sure I do. She didn’t get married off to the Cat King, did she?”

“So you keep reminding me.”

Muta huffed and folded his paper. “Alright, beaky, I’ll bite. What have they done now?”

“It isn’t a matter of what they have done as what they aren’t doing.”

“Yer speaking in riddles, birdbrain. Cut it out.”

“Have you checked Haru’s connections?”

Muta squinted sceptically at Toto. “Is this one of those trick question things where I’m meant to have checked every other month cause, if so, yes.”

Toto sighed. “Just do it.”

Muta continued squinting for another dubious moment before turning his attention to Haru. He could see the strings of connection running out from her - to her mother, to her friends, to Muta and Toto, to Baron...

“Oh heck.”

The string between Haru and Baron was a deep, burning red.

“When...?”

“Long enough that they should have done something about it by now.”

Muta scoffed. “That ain’t Haru’s fault. It’s your mortal with the emotional constipation.”

“That’s not--”

“Your words, not mine.”

“Toto didn’t speak immediately, pouting in the ensuing silence. Then, “We’re their guardian angels. We should do something.”

“Why? People fall in love all the time, no biggie.”

“He doesn’t. Not like this.”

Muta scoffed. Again. “How old is he? And yer telling me he’s never fallen in love before?”

“Crushes and curiosity, yes,” Toto confirmed. “But this... is much more long-term. This is staying.” This could make things complicated.

Muta hesitated. The bond between Haru and Baron wasn’t just built from love, but from trust and friendship and a thousand little moments. With any other mortal, he could just sit back and watch life take its course. Naturally, it would be Toto’s charge who would be the exception.

“Fine. Do you have a plan?”

“The beginnings of one.”

Muta grunted. Like mortal, like guardian. “And?”

“How familiar are you with Disney’s The Little Mermaid?”

“No. No way.”

Angels couldn’t rewrite reality, but they could... sweetalk it, given the right motivation.

So it perhaps wasn’t wholly unexpected that it was a perfect summer’s evening, that night upon the lake’s water, or that when the breeze rippled through the reeds a gentle tune whistled.

It was, and Toto was quite proud of the fact, the perfect romantic setting.

“This has to be,” Muta said, interupting Toto’s little moment of pride, “and you’ve have a lotta prize-winning moments over the centuries, the dumbest idea you’ve ever had. And that includes the noodle incident.”

“I didn’t see you offering any better ideas, furball.”

“I wanna see how badly this fails so I can laugh about it later.”

“Thanks. Your support is appreciated.”

Toto watched as Baron jumped down into the boat and offer a hand to Haru. Not that he was ever going to admit as much to Muta, but Toto hadn’t been entirely sure they would even get this far. It had taken a fair bit of gentle shoving - both verbal and mental - to get Baron to take the hint and invite Haru out on a definitely-not-date romantic evening.

Emotionally constipated indeed.

As Haru hopped down from the pier, an errant wave lapped against the boat and sent her stumbling. Baron shifted his grip within a heartbeat, catching her and suddenly they were so very close.

Then they both coughed awkwardly and moved away.

Toto shot a questioning look to Muta.

“What?” Muta demanded. “If you’re gonna meddle, I don’t see why I can’t have a little fun too.”

Haru settled into the boat, trying desperately to believe her blush was because of her near miss into the water and not for any more, uh, people-orientated reasons. She made a good show of examining the lake they were rowing across until she could be sure she could look at Baron without recalling the passing proximity of his eyes.

“So,” she managed eventually, “what exactly are we doing out here?”

Baron raised an eyebrow. “Did you not read the report?”

“I tried, but it was all Latin names and science. I mean, what’s a Balaenoptera caelum?”

“I believe the common name for the species is sky whale.”

“Well, why couldn’t they just say that?” Haru paused. “What, really?”

“Yes.”

“As in actual, whales-in-the-sky, those kinds of sky whales?”

“Yes.”

Haru took a moment, and then sat back. “Okay,” she said, “it’s official. This just got ten times cooler.” Her attention returned to Baron. “And we’re here because...?”

“Because once every decade, the juvenile sky whales leave their birthwaters and take to the sky for the first time. It’s meant to be quite spectacular, so I’ve heard.”

Haru was silent. Then, “This isn’t a case is it?”

“Not in the usual sense, no. We have no client, but Toto made a good point that it would be a rather unmissable experience.”

“He says and then misses it.”

“Yes,” Baron mused. “That did seem rather odd.”

“And Muta.”

“Yes.”

Haru thought. “Did you get the sense they were trying to get us out of the Sanctuary?” she asked eventually.

“The thought has crossed my mind, but I couldn’t discern for what reason they would want that.”

“We’re probably going to return and find the Bureau covered in toilet roll.”

“A daunting prospect if they could work together for five minutes without devolving into fighting.”

Haru snorted. “Oh god, it’s like leaving the children at home. I wonder what they’re up to now...”

“Are they still jus’ talking?”

“Give it time.”

“They’ve had time. Three years of it.”

Toto’s beak was set in a thin line. “Give it time.”

But still, he couldn’t resist. He sent a cold wind their way.

The air shifted and Haru shivered as an icy breeze rippled across her skin. She jarred mid-sentence with a teeth-chattering rattle. “I’m okay,” she managed, pulling her thin jacket closer. “I just should have brought a thicker coat. Geez, I thought it was meant to be a mild summer’s evening.”

A light-grey jacket came into view.

“Aren’t you going to get cold?” Haru asked.

He flashed her a warm smile. “You forget. Creation.”

Muta raised an eyebrow at his fellow angel. “Cheap shot.”

Something rocked the boat. Haru jolted upright, heart-pounding from too many cases where things that rocked boats usually wanted to eat them. Baron must have seen the thought skitter across her mind, for he gestured to her that everything was under control.

She had been on too many cases for it to assure her completely, but it did stop her from retrieving her heavy duty torch from her bag and wielding it like a crowbar.

“I think it’s beginning,” he whispered. “Listen.”

Haru did. At the edge of her hearing, there was the faint undercurrent of sound that she had previously mistaken for the breeze, but now it was growing and swelling and twisting into something resembling... “Music?”

Baron nodded. “All sky whales have their own unique songs. We are the first ones to hear these.”

The boat rocked again, and Haru shifted onto Baron’s side. “If I’m going overboard, you’re coming with me,” she whispered.

“That seems reasonable.”

“Oh, shush.”

The song rose and tumbled and suddenly a grey form was breaking the water’s surface. Eyes. Head. Mouth. And then flippers and back and tail... and suddenly no part of the whale was touching the water anymore.

Haru leant slowly against Baron, her heart pounding with the fear of a small primate coming across something very big and very scary and realising why they evolved to leave the ocean all those years ago. She licked her lips. Her mouth was dry. “Uh,” she said intelligently.

Baron looked to her questioningly.

“Big whales,” she croaked.

“These are just the juveniles.” He tilted his head. “Are you okay?”

“Big flying whales,” she managed. “Yeah, I’m fine, just... Big.” Another head breached the surface, and a sound caught between awe and rabbit-in-the-headlights caught in Haru’s throat. “Oh my god, there’s more.”

“It’s still not working.”

“Oh shut up.”

“You got any last minute plans up your wing?”

Toto grimaced. “Just the one.”

He gave reality another shove.

Once her initial instinctive reaction had been forcefully put down, Haru had to admit that it was pretty amazing. The whales seemed happy to pass the little boat by without incident, except for the occasional curious glance, and the air was now alive with the thrum of melody.

Baron was giving her another questioning look.

“What?” she asked.

“You’re humming.”

“So? It’s catchy.”

“All sky whale songs are unique. You shouldn’t be able to hum it.”

“Sure, but it sounds... familiar.” Still, she hummed along a little louder, trying to work out what it reminded her of. “There you see her... duh duh duh blue lagoon... mmmm one way to ask her... she won’t say a word, not a single word, go on and--”

She froze.

“Oh my god.”

“What is it?” Baron asked.

“Oh my god,” was all she could say. Her face was burning. She ducked her head into her hands, her words muffled. “I know why Toto and Muta sent us out here.”

“Why?”

She raised her eyes above her fingers, her expression caught between hysteria and indignation. “I literally cannot tell you.”

“Haru?”

“It wasn’t to toilet paper the Bureau.”

“Haru?”

She exhaled, long and slow and steadying. “I’m am going to kill them.”

“Oh dear,” said Toto. “I think we’re in trouble.”

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mikauzoran · 5 years

Text

Adrienette Drabble: Knowledge

Marinette set down her satchel on the café chair across from Nino’s with a heavy sigh. “Please tell me Adrien has spoken to you sometime in the last week and a half.”

“I’ve seen him every day this week, and he just texted me an hour ago. Why?” Nino asked so as not to let on that he already knew the answer.

“Okay. Good. So it’s just me, then.” Marinette sank into the remaining chair and grabbed Nino’s double espresso, taking a sip and making a disgusted face.

“Get your own, Cupcakes.” Nino stuck his tongue out, sliding his drink back to his side of the table.

She glanced over her shoulder at the crowd of people queueing at the counter.

“The line’s too long,” Marinette whined, propping her elbow up on the table and resting her cheek in her hand. She sighed softly. “…Adrien’s been avoiding me. He won’t answer my calls, and his responses to my texts have been super evasive. Whenever we have to be in the same room, he gets antsy and won’t meet my gaze. He runs out of class before I can get out a sentence. Do you know what’s up?”

She eyed him expectantly.

Nino shifted uncomfortably, avoiding her eyes. “I’m not sure.”

“I know he was kind of down after the breakup with Elise,” Marinette continued, trying to talk it out as she took one of Nino’s napkins and began to tear it into increasingly slender strips. “but he started dating that Marie girl almost right away, and he didn’t seem like he was doing it out of desperation or anything. Do you know if they’re still dating? He hasn’t gone off the deep end again, has he? He’s not sleeping with anyone? Because it kind of feels like he’s done something he’s ashamed of and now he doesn’t feel like he can face me.”

She eyed Nino intently again, hoping for some window onto the problem.

Nino sighed, setting down his pencil and pushing his book on borderline personality disorder away. “Okay. Here’s the redacted version of what I know. Marie broke up with him last week because he couldn’t get her name right. He’s not dating anyone now, and he’s not sleeping with anyone to my knowledge. Actually, he’s been spending most of his time either with me or with his parents. It seems like things are going pretty well, so…I was actually going to ask you what the heck was going on. He won’t tell me what happened, just that he can’t be around you right now.”

“What?!” Marinette choked. “What?!”

Nino shrugged.

“What?!” Marinette repeated.

Nino shrugged harder. “That’s what he said.”

“Why?!” Marinette gaped in horror. “What did I do? The last time I saw him, we were watching anime and baking a cake together. In the un-redacted version, did he say why he couldn’t be around me?!”

“Cupcakes, I am just as lost as you,” Nino sighed. “Look. Did…I don’t know…something happen between you two? Like…” Nino’s tanned skin darkened in a blush. “Did it maybe seem like he was trying to kiss you, or were you lying on top of him while you were snuggling watching a movie, or…something like that time on your balcony? Anything like that that would toe the line between friends and more than friends between you two?” Nino grasped at straws.

Marinette’s eyes went round as a furious blush spread like wildfire across her cheeks and the bridge of her nose. “Adrien told you about that?”

Nino swiped off his hat to rub at his forehead with the back of his hand. “Yeah? He…was kind of messed up about it…but mostly about other things tied up with that night…. But there was some discussion of whether that counted as losing his virginity, so…”

“Out of curiosity, what was the verdict?” Marinette couldn’t help but ask.

Nino shrugged. “We decided he could count it if he wanted or not if he didn’t.”

Adrien had decided to count it unless he actually got the opportunity to lose his virginity with Marinette, but Nino didn’t think Marinette should know that.

“…Do you mind me asking what you were thinking that night? That could have gone so bad so quickly, Marinette,” Nino sighed.

Marinette shrugged, looking down at the napkin shreds and picking a few up to tie into knots. “He was a hot mess. I mean, he was kind of having a meltdown, Nino, and, originally, I was just trying to calm him down. I thought a head rub and some nuzzling and a few kisses would help because, I mean, you know how he is. It was all perfectly innocent. I didn’t even kiss him on the lips.”

Nino grunted for her to continue.

She chewed on her bottom lip. “I didn’t account for the fact that he’d be so sensitive. I mean, I’ve seen him make out with his girlfriends before—like, the full-on tonsil hockey—and it never seemed to affect him like that. I don’t know if he was just in a really bad place and that made him even more sensitive than normal, but…it was really a hair-trigger response, and…I had to decide whether to stop and make a big deal of it…or keep going and try to make it seem like it wasn’t a big deal for me.”

She looked up guiltily as she confessed, “I know it was wrong to take advantage of him like that, but we were both hormonal messes, and it was kind of a power trip making him want me like that, and I thought…since we were both having a sucky night, at least one of us deserved some release, so…” She blushed, looking away. “I may not have been thinking too clearly in that moment. I know it’s not anatomically possible, but do you think girls can ‘think with their dicks’ too?”

Nino gave a soft chuckle at that. “I know girls with bigger balls than some guys. I’m gonna say girls can think with their dicks too…. Damn. Alya’s is probably bigger than mine.”

Marinette burst out laughing and had to clamp both hands over her mouth to stifle her giggles.

When she managed to calm down, she smiled nervously and hesitantly asked, “Are you mad at me? Have you been mad at me these past two months for what happened between Adrien and me?”

Nino shook his head. “Nah. I try not to get too upset over the things you two do to each other. It messed with his head a little, but I honestly think it would have been worse if you’d stopped. It’s really not a big deal since it didn’t become a toxic, friends with benefits situation. Nothing like that has happened again, right?”

“No,” Marinette confirmed. “I mean, we snuggle and hug and just kind of affectionate stuff—like what I do with Alya—but we haven’t done anything like that again.”

“And nothing else happened recently to cause Adrien’s sudden avoidance?” Nino sighed, removing his cap to scratch at his head. “You didn’t have a fight? You didn’t suddenly announce you were going to be dating anyone?”

Marinette shrugged, completely at a loss. “I’m going to get to the bottom of this tomorrow, though.”

“Oh?” Nino wondered if he wanted to know.

She smirked, and he briefly considered warning Adrien. “I’m going to ambush him and fix whatever this is. I’m going to get him to tell me what the problem is, and, if it’s my fault, I’ll apologize. If he thinks he’s done something unforgiveable again, I’ll remind him how much we love him.”

Nino gave an amused snort. “In laymen’s terms, you’re going to love and tolerate the tar out of him.”

“Exactly.” Marinette snapped, pointing a finger gun at Nino. “…Man, he’s a lot of work.”

“Is he worth it?” Nino wondered.

Marinette had to stop and consider this. “…Ask me again once I get back from ordering my drink.”

“Is he worth it?” Nino inquired again as Marinette returned with her mocha chai latte.

“His friendship? Yes,” Marinette responded confidently.

“Uh-oh. That’s a qualified answer if I’ve ever heard one,” Nino sighed. “His friendship is worth the work, but…?”

Marinette retook her place and leaned back to gaze up at the ceiling. “He’s a really sucky boyfriend. I’m thinking I dodged a bullet.”

Nino’s face plummeted.

“He was such a flake with her and not thoughtful or considerate or… I didn’t like the person he was as Elise’s boyfriend. Sure, he was a lot more stable and calmer and more emotionally and mentally healthy at that point, but…he’d do or say something, and I wouldn’t like him very much.” Marinette sat up and frowned at Nino.

“But at the same time, he was different when he was with me. With me…he was still that dorky, funny, kind, naïve, sweet guy that I’d originally fallen in love with. I don’t know. He was a total brat to Elise, but, with me, he was still my Adrien, so…”

“Do you still love him?” Nino asked while they were at it, peeking into Pandora’s box.

Marinette smiled sadly and nodded. “He may not be the man I thought he was, and he may be broken in places, but there’s still so much to love about him. I’m disappointed in him, and sometimes he really makes me mad, but I can’t not forgive him, you know?”

Nino knew the feeling well. He sighed, rubbing at the bridge of his nose. “It’s those damn eyes of his. One look from those big, soulful, sad green eyes, and you just melt.”

Marinette nodded. “Or when he rests his head on my shoulder or smiles or gives me fabric or brings over a new type of weird Japanese candy to try together…when he texts me just to say he was thinking about me…” Marinette hung her head in resignation. “I really need to get over him.”

Nino bit his tongue. “Have you…considered telling him about your feelings?” he tentatively inquired. “Would it help to finally get it off your chest?”

Marinette shrugged and shook her head. “What’s the point? Even if he somehow did return my feelings, it’s not like we could be in a relationship. He was desperately in love with some girl for four years, and she’s absolutely wrecked him for anyone else. It’s going to be a while still before he’s in a good enough place to be able to be in a real relationship.”

“It sounds like you need to find someone else, then,” Nino gently informed, even though he knew it would kill Adrien to lose her. “Honestly, I love Adrien, but, as your friend, I don’t want to see you spend your life pining after him.”

Marinette nodded, staring down into her cup.

“…Can I talk to you about something?” she mumbled several minutes later.

“Shoot, but make sure you aim to kill, Cupcakes,” he responded with a shrug.

She pressed her lips together. “You know my one friend? Minou?”

“The sexy one or the cat that your neighbor feeds?” Nino snickered.

Marinette rolled her eyes and chuckled. “The sexy one.”

“I like this subject.” Nino leaned forward in interest. “What about your sexy friend Minou?”

Marinette’s expression sobered even as her cheeks took on a soft, pink hue. “He told me he loves me.”

Nino’s nose wrinkled. “Again? Geez. He was doing pretty well. What was that? Almost a year and a half he was able to respect your wishes and lay off?”

Marinette shook her head. “No, Nino. He told me he loves me…the other other me.”

Nino’s jaw went slack. “Ooooh. He told Marinette. Damn. The poor guy just can’t get over you. That’s…kind of sweet…in a really sad, tragic kind of way. What did you tell him?”

She looked down at her hands, muttering, “What I always tell him…except…I might have added that I was attracted to him too and that if not for the guy I like…I shouldn’t have told him that. I should have just stuck to the script because now he’s probably thinking he might have a chance, and…”

“Does he not have a chance?” Nino prompted and watched her squirm.

“He…I don’t know,” Marinette sighed in frustration, tugging on one of her pigtails. “He kissed me. It didn’t last long, but it was super intense. He kissed me, and then he ran, and I haven’t been able to get him out of my head for the past two weeks.”

“Uh-oh,” Nino snickered. “Sounds like, after four and a half years, he’s finally cracked you.”

“This is so not funny,” Marinette hissed.

“This is so, so funny,” Nino continued to laugh.

“Jerk,” Marinette spit without heat. “Why do I even talk to you?”

“Because Alya would kill you if she found out you’d been keeping Minou a dirty little secret all these years?” he reminded. “Because I’m the only one you can talk to about…you know. Both of you.”

Marinette balled up a fistful of napkin scraps and threw them at him. “You suck.”

“For a grand total of maybe two people.” Nino grinned toothily.

“Be serious?” Marinette pleaded with entreating eyes.

Nino nodded, swapping his smirk for a smile of compassion. “Cupcakes, go for it. If you’re interest in him and he’s interested in you, do it. Be honest about your situation with Adrien and what you can and can’t give Minou right now, and if he still wants to try a relationship, try a relationship.”

Marinette chewed thoughtfully on her lip. “But…how honest do I have to be?”

Nino shrugged. “Honest enough not to give him false expectations or lead him on.”

“I meant…” she lowered her voice. “Do I need to tell him about…the other me?”

“No, no, no,” Nino insisted, waving his arms vehemently. “Don’t do that. Bad idea. Just…not right now, anyway. Not yet. I mean, you don’t even know what’s going to happen between you. It could be over in a week. You don’t want to tell him and mess up your partnership over it. Wait until it looks like it’s getting serious. At that point, you two will owe it to each other to swap reveals, but…right now, just date him.”

“Just date him,” Marinette mumbled. “Okay. If…When I see him again, I’ll apologize and tell him…that I want to give ‘us’ a chance.”

Nino nodded in support. “There you go. He’ll come back, Marinette. He’s probably crazy about you.”

“He sounded like it,” she chuckled, smiling softly and wrapping a bang around her finger. “I really am kind of excited. I’ve always wanted someone to love me like that, not just her…and now it’s happening.”

“I’m really happy for you, Marinette.” He reached across the table to pat her on the head. “You deserve to be cherished.”

“Thanks,” Marinette giggled, and then a puckish smirk slowly spread across her lips. “Okay. Enough of my relationship drama. Let’s talk about your relationship drama. How about that pregnancy scare the other day?”

Nino rolled his eyes. “Alya was the only one scared. I knew there was a zero percent chance she was pregnant…unless she was cheating on me…which wasn’t a serious concern either. I am deathly serious about protection. I love her too much to put her in that position.”

“You’re seriously awesome, you know that?” Marinette chuckled. “But what if she was really pregnant? Would you be scared? I mean, we’re eighteen.”

Nino shrugged. “‘Concerned’ is a better word. I’d dig her out of a pile of rubble with my bare hands; what’s one unplanned pregnancy? We’d make it work. The timeline would be a little more accelerated than I’d originally planned, but I’m in this for the long haul, so…” Nino shrugged again. “She’s the one with the commitment issues.”

“She loves you too, Nino,” Marinette stressed.

“Oh, I know she does,” he chuckled. “There’s no doubt in my mind where I stand with her. She just hasn’t come to terms with it yet. But that’s okay. I can wait.”

Marinette nodded. “Some people are worth waiting for.”

The words no sooner left her lips than she wondered if Adrien was worth waiting for…if she herself was worth waiting for to Chat Noir.

#Adrienette #Miraculous Ladybug #Miraculous Ladybug Fanfiction #Marinette Dupain-Cheng/Adrien Agreste #Marinette Dupain-Cheng #Nino Lahiffe #Mikau's Writings #There's a Daisy

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cantusecho · 5 years

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(Episode 4 thingssssss

Truthfully, this episode was pretty chill, meaning it feels like things don’t start to pick up until the middle portion (Maria’s song) and the end (Hanasaku Yuki).

But! There is one thing that got me curious.

I’ve been grateful for the cameo’s of Miku in each episode. I’m still ridiculously excited what they may have planned for her in the season. However, even if they’re small appearances, I feel like they’re important, as in it’s building up to something later.

With AXZ and XV being made together, I still have confidence that this season will be paced well enough. What they’re doing seems to be changing everything up compared to previous seasons, which is why I think people are a little iffy on how things go or are going so far. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

Anyway! This short scene with Hibiki and Miku left me feeling a certain way;

Hibiki cuts her off before Miku can finish her sentence. Now, without thinking, this can be seen as amusing but my first thought was worry. We all know about the hints towards Miku this season, or ever since the end of AXZ, but these small scenes between Hibiki and Miku so far in this season makes it feel like there’s some...strange distance between them or as a friend put it, they’re “out of sync” with each other.

Hibiki has gotten to the point as a character where she doesn’t hide many of her problems anymore and relies on Miku more than before for that sense of normalcy. Miku, perhaps used to the sense of normalcy clashing with Hibiki’s hectic battle life, is content on being that support for her. However--- Ever since episode 1 of XV, heck technically since S1, Miku has had issues expressing her deeper feelings. She’s always been frustrated with her not being able to communicate in general, or express herself like others (as she explains in AXZ, as well as her XV bio).

In Hibiki’s second song this season, “Kimi Dake Ni”, she admits to not noticing Miku’s tears unless she was literally in trouble. That means, even when Miku may seem fine on the outside when they’re talking normally and at school, Hibiki didn’t notice that Miku was actually having her own struggles, which is sad haha.

Not sure what it will take for her to realize it in the show, but clearly she does at some point since “Kimi Dake Ni” is her literally pouring her heart out to Miku, which is seriously a first in my opinion haha. So I feel like little things like this will be adding up for later.

I’d talk about this dang scene all day so let me move on.

Shout out to the same scene though for referencing the one time Miku and Hibiki invited Tsubasa to go out for karaoke in S1 because they wanted to try and cheer her up. It was sweet.

But clearly Tsubasa still isn’t fine.

Clearly Fudou is still getting under her skin.

And speaking of him---

He’s over 100 years old yet is strong? The heck is up with this dude?

Okay, jokes aside, Fudou is clearly the bad-guy of this season, as I assumed ever since AXZ ended. He orders Millaarc to kill, which I’m wondering why they’re listening to him. Maybe because he’s so powerful, he gives them protection (technically) from being found out, as well as getting the blood they need to survive? And in return, they help him obtain the divine power?

That’s what I assume, anyway. And he already speaks about making his next move because it’s clear, after one of the people who put on the bracelet tried using it and basically exploded, it can’t be handled by just about anyone. And we know that the only two people that can handle the Divine Power is Miku and Hibiki.

Miku I assume is still under the radar, which leaves Hibiki being the obvious one since it took her over last season. However, we don’t know if Fudou knows about Miku or not. With his power, and possible connections, he could very well know but again, no telling.

Maria’s transformation is awesome. Her song is awesome. Hibiki is a mess. That’s all. Lmao.

After that fight, they have everyone back on the bridge to listen to the strange music they picked up, which was briefly when Shem-Ha was activated. They picked up the Aufwachen waveform, which honestly reminded me of how Airgetlam’s waveform looked like.

(Shem-Ha)

(Airgetlam)

And it’s interesting that Maria seems confused by slightly recognizing the distorted music that was picked up from Shem-Ha as well.

With all the hints towards Maria’s background this season (her line in episode 2 and the OP), this surely will play into that as well. Wondering how though of course.

Now, the craziest thing that happened was the whole Hanasaku Yuki and duet with Saint-Germain. Just in case for those that don’t know, Aoi (Hibiki’s VA) suggested her and Minako (Saint-Germain’s VA) actually sing the song together at the 2018 LIVE, which they proceeded to do. It was nice, because it actually felt like the song was something between the two of wanting to come to an understanding and connect, but they were both fighting strongly for what they believed in and so were at odds. The song strangely fits very well as a duet and I didn’t realize this until seeing the LIVE.

And so, having it actually show in the anime, where they are literally fighting together and singing the song, it made me get a little emotional.

Hibiki has grown a lot over the series; in the beginning, all she’s wanted to do was make friends with everyone and that sometimes made her a little bit pushy. That’s technically how she managed to make friends with Chris, Tsubasa, Maria and the others.

The next person I think she tried hard with was Carol. She was determined to try and befriend her, to save her so to speak, but it didn’t work out. It’s a personal headcanon of mine that Hibiki thinks about Carol often and how they failed in saving her. So she tried a different approach with Saint-Germain in attempting to try and understand her way of thinking instead of pushing her own beliefs on a person, as well as realizing that people are fighting hard for their beliefs just as hard as she is.

Like she says in Hanasaku Yuki, there’s no “good or evil when it comes to landing a single blow”.

It’s already been officially confirmed, even before this episode due to the keywords, that the Gears were practically part Faust Robe due to the Lapis Philosophorum (Philosopher’s Stone) merging with them at the end of AXZ (when they used it instead of achieving X-Drive, since they had no means of accumulating that much Phonic Gain to achieve it anyway) so that’s where these new forms come from, known as Amalgam.

Amalgam means “a mixture or blend” so it makes sense.

But what makes me emotional about this is because Hibiki technically has her dream come true at this point. She’s fighting alongside Saint-Germain. They did at the end of AXZ, but it clearly feels like they’ve managed to come to a more mutual understanding thanks to all of it.

It makes me wonder if they’ll actually release an official duet version of this song between the two. I would love it, honestly.

But after all that, Hibiki tries offering her friendship to Vanessa, since she says she wants to get her body back and make friends. But before she could respond, the Gear users are ordered to step down from official government orders.

But the thing about this is that they’re holding everyone on the bridge at gunpoint.

I assume this is due to Fudou and his so called “next move” that he’s already made.

Again, things are heading off pretty fast this season. There’s 9 episodes left and that form they achieved is something I thought they wouldn’t get until maybe around episode 10 or later? Since that’s how it normally goes. But if Fudou is going to be the main baddy, what about Noble Red (Vanessa, Elsa and Millaarc)? How will they continue to fit into this? It may seem fast, but I think they still have things planned to stretch out upon these next 9 episodes.

This all depends on how they execute it but I’m not trying to jump the gun when we still have plenty of story left to tell. I feel like I can’t judge pacing until the season is over. Maybe that’s too late for me to form an opinion, but I find it easier to look back instead of assuming as we go along.

So I won’t say it was “rushed” or anything like that until we get further in. Then I’ll think about possible pacing issues.

Hm, that’s all I got I guess! Lol.)

#ooc

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cottonblush · 5 years

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wild(t) love | zcl, kjw

❧ word count: 1,414

❧ genre: crack lmao

❧ notes: ohmygod i can’t believe this is the first story i’m posting on here i literally wrote this for my friend at 11pm yw rochenle!!

when you first learn that you’re going to be working at sm entertainment you almost cry

bc you’re still in college and struggling™ and this opportunity is a blessing

and you can’t wait to start bc then you’ll get to see your childhood friend jungwoo again

also bc sm is so well known you get to travel with the groups and your college will like let you make up tests and stuff

let’s face it sooman is that! powerful ceo

anyway so you go into it thinking oh it’d be nice to see jungwoo like once in a while

bc you were told you’d be the assistant manager for the rookies

but last minute they’re like LMAO NOpe and they assign you to nct 127

and you’re like !!!! jungwoo is in that group wow am i blessed or am i blessed

so like a month into the job you go to this meeting and they’re like

for nct’s next concept we’ll be going to a jungle to take the pictures we’re going for that wiLDT concept

and you’re like ?? i mean extra but ok sure

and the next thing you know you’re on a plane with nct 127 going to some remote jungle

you, jungwoo, and doyoung are random stuff and like gossiping

also jungwoo is hitting on you and doyoung like at the same time

wow we love a flirt

haechan and mark are having their summer fight 2.0 bc haechan said there’s no difference between coke and pepsi and mark is like sTFU U DUMB BINCH OFC THERE IS I CAN’T ASSOCIATE WITH UNCULTURED SWINE UGH

taeyong, yuta, and jaehyun are watching a basketball anime and do some complex handshake every time the protagonist scores a point

johnny is sitting there still giggling to himself about that time ten said john’s banana even though it’s been like a decade

winwin and and lucas are conversing in chinese and to everyone else they sound like intellectuals bc like,,, the chinese language sounds bEAUTIFul don’t even deny it

but irl lucas is asking winwin how many calories are in a booger and winwin’s like idk man i mean probably like 2 they can’t be that unhealthy

this in turn causes lucas to think that one can survive on boogers bc they won’t gain weight but it’s still food

and then winwin has to explain that you need 2,000+ calories a day so lucas would need to pick 1,000 different noses every day

taeil is still sulking about the fact that yuta stole the seat next to winwin from him

he finds a little bug on the floor and somehow starts an inner monologue like ‘i feel u my friend i know how it is to feel alone and unwanted and not appreciated like this one sided love is really killing us buddy’

but like taeil, sweetie, it’s a bug so it clearly can’t relate

and then taeil sees another bug crawl up to the bug and they creep away together

and he goes ‘oh i see… i guess i truly am alone’ and like a single tear rolls down his cheek as he pulls out his phone and opens up his sad violin music playlist that has like 600 songs

yall get there in like 45 minutes so you’re like lol they said remote jungle watch it be like some dog park

but then you get off the plane and literally choke on your own words bc like,, issa jungle

you guys are told that there’s a secret cabin thing nearby and members will come individually to the jungle each day to take concept pictures so that the group can have a lil vacation

jungwoo is supposed to take his pictures on the third day and it’s finally time so he, you, another manager, and the photographer’s crew drive out to the jungle

and take some saucy pictures

but then a problem arises bc jungwoo sees a snake (it’s actually just a vine that fell from a tree but you figure you should at least save some of his pride) and screams but like soft screams so only you notice

and he like zooms,,, usain bolt? more like jungwoo bolt

you have to go after him bc otherwise you would probably be murdered if fans found out you let jungwoo go into a jungle alone

and somehow the crew just assumes yall ran back to the van so they take off without you

so when you two get back you’re like uHHHHH where yall @ stop playing

jungwoo starts panicking and genuinely thinks you two are going to die and you’re lowkey offended bc you’re thinking ‘my survival skills are excellent thank you very much at least i don’t have a heart attack every time i see a plant’

but all of a sudden you hear this really loud scream

or it’s more like a yell?? or like a cry or a shout? you honestly don’t know

it sounds like tarzan though and you wanna laugh but are also worried at the same time

the trees rustle a lot so you look up and you see some random boy with like

grass green hair and he’s only wearing a leaf skirt and a coconut bra

and you wanna question it like why the bra?? bc it just looks uncomfortable

anyway so this guy is like swinging through the vines when he sees you and he stops and stares for what seems like forever

he starts speaking but yall cant understand him bc somehow his sentences are a mix of korean, chinese, and arabic

you know it’s arabic bc you hear marhaba and you’re like ayEE shoutout to my foreign language teacher in 7th grade your class finally came in handy

so you try to speak back to him and he understands you bc he just launches off a tree, lands in front of you, and speaks fluent korean

and you just go ‘bro what’s up with the arabic’

and he shrugs his shoulders and explains that the last visitor he had spoke arabic and taught him the language

you and jungwoo share a look like,,, visitor? does he have a house or smth

and the guy laughs and is like i’ll take you there!! but i should probably introduce myself my name is chenle

you guys take turns sharing about yourself as chenle leads the way to some mystery location

which turns out to be this giant tree house mansion

and you’re questioning him like did u build this yourself bc no offense dude but ur kinda skinny’

and jungwoo is just in awe and he’s like heck yeah he’s skinny! a skinny leGEND

chenle’s like lol no the monkeys built this for me

uh?? monkeys

and sure enough a group of about 25 monkeys comes into the mansion and like surrounds the three of you and starts inspecting you and jungwoo

one of them sits on your shoulder and chenle smiles and goes ‘oh great they approve of u’

and you go ‘oh that’s chill i guess’

chenle: yeah it’s great it means they won’t beat u with coconuts

you, jungwoo: um wHAT

chenle: [innocent smile]

anyway it’s been quite a day and jungwoo says he’s tired so the monkeys lead him to a couch and sit him down

and you and chenle just talk about stuff and hours go by like seconds

and as you two watch the sunset through the trees

chenle turns to you and asks

i know we just met but i feel like we’re soulmates and u get me will u marry me

and you’re about to respond when you’re interrupted by jungwoo’s slightly sleepy voice saying ‘heCk no y/n is mine binch back off’

and you’re like ‘guys guys calm down let’s not-’

chenle cuts you off and goes ‘yeah you heard her let’s be calm there’s plenty of love to go around we can just share her affection’

jungwoo agrees bc he’s half asleep and bc he thinks that the lil monkeys that helped him with everything are so convenient and he could get used to this life

and that’s how you start the rest of your life with your two husbands in a remote forest in an undisclosed location

and like yall don’t know it but the rest of nct is going crazy trying to find yall but chenle’s monkey family keeps them away so you guys can live happily ever after

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