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#that tree at the end of the street.

silentcitystreetart · 2 years

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The floor boards have separated in the kitchen. Breathing in the thick summer air, the house expands in protest. Rumbles come from the far hills, signalling chaos in electric Omniscience. Beetles pour out of the hole into a chittering, vibrating mass of churning insects. Covering a house without a home, your heart is empty. They've come to fill it. The mass crawls closer and closer towards you as you lie in bed. Asleep in knowing dreams, you've made a friend indeed.

#gothic americana #writers of tumblr #writing #spooky #surreal #liminal tumblr #liminal #cryptid #cryptidcore #canadian gothic #liminal spaces #regionalgothic #a story about you #duststirs #that tree at the end of the street.#the old gods love you #the house at the end of the street

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kingsandbastardz · 2 months

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So this is a thing that’s been bouncing around in my head for awhile, but I hadn’t really had a good starting point for it because it was just a billion fragmented pieces. I kinda have to write it now, though bc I think it’s giving me mental constipation and actively preventing me from writing other things. Anyway, forgive me for being long-winded.

---

Regardless of how you see the ending – whether you think he reached enlightenment/ascended, or he died, or he lived -- llh’s story is about escaping the narrative.

FDB meanwhile is about being a catalyst of change or transformation, whether it is for his own life or llh’s. He exists in a shifting narrative space that's difficult to define and creates narrative movement from that.

DFS… well. He's still trapped.

First, what exactly is ‘the narrative’ I’m talking about here? It’s a thought or concept, it’s alive yet also not. It’s essentially the words of a story strung together and told and retold, adjusting to the whims of the storyteller and the desires of the people hearing it. It lives and changes organically based on call, response and group consensus.

It’s a crowd of people sitting around an old man in one town, nodding along and yelling when they don’t like the direction a story is going – and then in the next town, that same story teller making adjustments so he gets more tips that evening. It’s people in other towns asking repeatedly for the same story over and over because they like that one hero and each time, the storyteller obliges them, with small details being added or falling off. It’s the collected gossip that morphs as it moves like lightning through an entire city. It’s the records found in a courts’ archives where the ink has become smeared and illegible because a scribe dropped it in a puddle and the next scribe did his best to write in the margins what he thinks it said. Probably.

It is the men at the beginning and end of MLC telling the crowd about Li Xiangyi’s great feats while dressed in white, and heroically battling evil.

This changing, amorphous thing is The Narrative. Now, see the entirety of MLC as such a story—this narrative being told by all these different voices to the audience (us).

So LLH escapes it. FDB defies it and changes it and refuses to live by it.

DFS is… he is part of it. If he ever cared about what anyone says about him, dfs has long since given up on changing the narrative. He’s learned to accept it because it literally doesn’t matter what he says or does – ppl will always spin it to suit the needs of the story, which will then get passed around as fact. So he lives within this framework of societal expectation for the villainous. He weaponizes it to use it to his advantage. And, ultimately, he’s trapped by it.

Imagine a yin yang symbol. Imagine llh standing on one dot with dfs standing on another. Imagine the yin yang spinning as they both walk forward. They’re interlinked, never to be separated. They’re mirrors, but at the same time always moving in opposite directions of each other as the symbol spins. This is the position I image DFS being when in relation to llh.

Narratively, DFS both parallels and moves in opposite directions to llh.

Mirrored parallels, let’s go with that - Where they are the same but on opposite ends of it:

Visually dark vs light in clothing etc, even their masks are black vs silver and on opposite sides of their faces

Skills and energy-wise: both utilize pure yang energies but fast and overwhelming vs slow and steady

Positioned as great rivals/oppositional forces of equal skill

He’s just as trapped by the narrative as LXY but as the demon lord instead of the hero

Repeatedly placed on opposite sides of the screen as a visual cue

Dfs = chaos, llh = agent of order

Llh femme presenting for a very heteronormative appearing sect and storyline while dfs is extremely masculine/heteronormative appearing, but at the helm of a sect that is full of fringe elements and is potentially queer

regarding personal health - llh uses risk percentage as an excuse to not try to heal himself – meanwhile dfs will take any risk to heal himself even if it means he dies

Dfs rescued himself as a child while llh is picked up and nurtured by others

Dfs is a self-taught genius while llh is a trained genius

Dfs survives so hard he doesn’t understand what it means to want to die, llh wants to disappear so badly that he doesn’t understand what it means to desire to live

Oh right, and the thing I didn’t mention before. Not only does DFS live in the narrative. DFS is narratively bound to llh. He is not and was never independent of llh. Not due to lack of skill or for want of trying, dfs is narratively incapable of succeeding at his greatest goals without llh’s help – or ultimately fails due to llh’s actions. Either outcome, llh is involved.

He leaves the story when LLH does (disappearing into the ocean after the Donghai Battle) and returns to the narrative (leaves seclusion) the very moment FDB forces LLH to become active again and LLH starts moving to tie up loose ends.

His attempt for establishing peace was destroyed by Shan Guado and Jiao Liqiao, yes, but it ultimately fails because lxy declares war and ‘kills’ him. It takes LLH revealing himself to everyone and establishing events for things to quiet down.

Unable to reach the guanyin elixir without llh’s help

Unable to figure out the secret behind shan gudao’s death and the war between their sects without llh’s cooperation

Succeeds in finding the styx flower, not for himself, but for llh’s benefit

Unable to reach the next level of Beifeng Baiyang without help from llh and Yangzhou Man

Continuously bids for freedom and agency – but his first attempt is foiled by not being able to get rid of the mind control bug. Then during the amnesia arc, his ‘freedom’ from his enemies comes at the cost of being kept by llh as a servant. Then as soon as he was able to get rid of the mind control bug, he’s captured by jlq and his freedom/autonomy is taken away again. If the narrative was a sentient being – it’s watching him claw his way up the side of a mountain and every time he almost reaches the top, it chops his hand or fingers off to send him flying back down below. Ultimately, DFS is only able to regain physical and mental freedom when llh rescues him and choses to give him that freedom (see amnesia arc where llh tries to keep dfs as his servant/weapon).

Cure llh/save his life – ultimately stopped by llh’s actions.

Simply put – while llh exists without dfs. As far as the narrative is concerned, dfs does not exist without llh. Jinyuan Alliance is replaced completely by Shan Gudao as the bad guys in the story. (Which he was- but there is no mention of DFS or the alliance's roles - everything is attributed to lxy's heroism and return from the dead.)

So what happens post canon in a world where llh is dead? What then? We have fdb, right?

I’ve been bothered by this – and as much as I go on about how fdb is the future of the story. That he’s the inheritor of everything llh, including dfs... There is no guarantee of anything because he’s the guy that writes his own story and transforms his narrative.

We get the bit of bonding with each other in the zombie village when llh deliberately leaves them alone with each other (could this be an example of llh facilitating emotional bonds between the two?). We get fdb’s sense of betrayal later on when he thinks dfs turned on them. And then later his happiness when he realizes dfs was on their side. We get him calling dfs Lao Di. But then we have the moment at the eastern sea with the letter - where we get him running off to investigate alone until both men just happen to arrive at the beach at the same time from opposite directions. Because fate, I guess. I think dfs and fdb’s relationship is meant to be a 50/50 swing by design because we don't know the future and Fdb is ultimately the catalyst for whatever direction the story goes.

As two men who loved the same man and who tried their best but ultimately failed to keep llh alive, will he care enough about dfs to maintain ties with him or… just… walk away after saying his goodbyes --- you know, they way they often do in jainghu.

So just for speculation’s sake. Let’s say, with no additional input or relationship development. Let’s say they take the second route and go their separate ways. FDB doesn’t reach out further to DFS and DFS never tries to find fdb for a replacement fight. They never try to bridge that llh-shaped gap.

This is where we come to the third thing – Narratively, dfs’ purpose is to remind llh of the true past and to provide information or vehicles for him in his quest to address that past.

So what does that mean for dfs when LLH dies? Dfs, as a survivor, cannot physically do the same. How will he die narratively? Imo, with the way his movements mirror llh's and his role for llh, it makes sense that dfs will do what llh did - he goes back to where he was in the past. He returns to the beginning.

And from there? Maybe, DFS returns to seclusion, or a form of seclusion at least, once again in mourning. Because otherwise what else does he have left that holds meaning for him? Jinyuan Alliance? Whatever remnants remain... he never cared about it and I’d argue that at the very start of the series, he was already 1-foot out the door with retiring from leadership. Strength was freedom – he has both, so now what? Power and skill? The one person he wants to fight is gone.

DFS goes away. Days become months, become years and life continues on. New heroes and villians will rise and fall. And one day, fdb will remember he used to know a powerful guy. Whatever happened to him? And the people around him will shrug. Some may even be young enough to be like, “Who?” FDB lets it go because he’s a busy man. He’s got businesses to run, students to train, etc – can you blame him? His life is full. Eventually, he forgets he ever asked a question.

This is how the last living piece of dfs in the worlds’ consciousness dies. He fades away from memory, absentmindedly.

Maybe one day, a student or scholar will crack open a book about the history of li xiangyi and if they don't skim, they’ll come across a line or two talking about some guy that fought lxy that one time and ultimately failed to kill him. Maybe they will be motivated enough to look further into him, maybe not.

Llh remains alive as a memory – his legacy kept alive by fdb who’s his student and his students’ students. Sigu Sect and Baichuan Court remain as pillars of society.

DFS? Who is there to remember him? Who is there to see how his story ends? Does it matter? Who is DFS without llh?

There are plants that exist without their natural pollinators or creatures that eat their fruit because they are so ancient, those creatures no longer exist. We only know what they potentially look like based on the shape of the flower/plant/tree.. They survive because they have evolutionarily figured out stopgap measures to make up for the deaths of their pollinators. But one day those measures will no longer work. Stopgaps only buy time. That plant exists as a living memory of something that used to exist and then one day it too will die.

DFS is like that remaining plant.

You know that question about whether a tree exists if no one is there to hear them fall in the woods?

Now, here is me, getting a leg cramp in the audience. I’ve always loved the antagonists, the monster-shaped beings that weren’t really monsters inside, and all the random side characters that fall off the story one after another. I’ve always bothered the hell out of everyone bc I’m the person going “So what about x? What about y? Where is z now?”

So consider this me asking – in a story where his existence is swallowed by a narrative that no longer needs him - what about dfs? Where is he now? What is he doing now?

#But here's the thing. This is about dfs. I like to think that one day the story picks up again w/ a rich young shaoye and a guy named a-fei #they argue in the street constantly to the amusement of all the aunties #but everyone knows to go to them if your cat ends up in a tree or you lose anything or if someone mysteriously dies and the yamen ignore it #Or if your sister gets sold. She'll be back on your doorstep the next day with enough money for you to run away with her and start anew #mysterious lotus casebook #di feisheng #my royal ramblings #meta #li lianhua #fang duobing #me and my insomnia induced shitty takes

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gayemeralds · 2 years

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here's the thing about shadow: his role, as the protector/savior of the world, is already being utilized. there's someone else filling his role. sonic.

shadow fulfilling his goal of protecting the world would have been fine as a one off thing. shadow being the protector and dying valiantly thus fulfilled what gerald and maria originally intended for him. he kept his promise to maria, even at the ultimate cost.

but by bringing him back from the dead, sega brought about a very big question- what do we do with him now? the role he wants is already being filled. there's not really a need for him. so what's left for him?

i don't think sega honestly has a concrete answer. the route they seem to take is that shadow's trying to let go of his past but also keep maria's promise. but i think, for both fans and sega, that they put far too much emphasis on maria's promise. i don't think it's a satisfying arc for shadow to save the world just because he feels he has to, just because he promised he would, just because he was intended to do so. shadow 05 was all about a deep exploration into morality and identity. what is shadow, now that maria and gerald are no longer in his life? what is shadow, now that someone is already fulfilling the role of the hero?

personally, if i had been in charge, i would have put him on team chaotix. having shadow align with g.u.n. is frankly a bad move- the very same branch of government that literally killed shadow's family and is filled to the brim with corruption? i don't see shadow joining, not willingly. and i definitely don't see him joining as an alternative to being a hero. the commander and him still have a lot of unresolved conflict and there's the fact that g.u.n. KILLED maria and EXECUTED gerald.

i think him being a part of team chaotix would be a good compromise. shadow's allowed to let go of his past, to no longer live up to the expectations of others. he's not just fulfilling a role, he's not just doing what he was always originally intended to do- he's carving out his own path and his own identity but he's still able to keep maria's promise, just on a smaller scale. he helps the chaotix with smaller level cases, helps keep people smiling and happy, becomes a hero to the little people.

the chaotix could definitely help him loosen up and learn to create his own identity without worrying about other people's perception. shadow fufills his promise without compromising the idea of giving him a life separate to the one gerald and gun intended for him. he's not a weapon or a cure or a saviour or whatever. he can just be shadow.

#there is something quite lovely to me in the idea of weapon of revenge shadow the hedgehog #ends up being some guy that helps old ladies cross the street or gets cats out of trees #its about the choice of living a peaceful life after seeing so much hate and tragedy #its about being able to choose mundanity #its not about surviving or fighting or whatever #its about thriving #sega official speaks #i don't know #like im fond of the idea that shadow wants to keep his promise but i always HATE how much like..... spotlight/focus is on that aspect #i think its counterintuitive to have him only be a hero because of maria #i honestly don't think thats particualry canon #or at least wasn't the direction they were going with him until they jsut gutted his character into edgy sonic rival #in my mind he'd more of a bonus back up character #like he's plan b if something goes wrong with sonic #but he wouldn't be a part of the main cast #also i don't necessarily mind team dark as a family but i just don't really think they would be able to #and i stress #HEALTHILY give shadow a sense of identity while fufilling maria's promise #omega can teach shadow how to live beyond what his creators wanted from him #and rouge can teach him the value of selfishness #the value of your own life #but ultimately i don't think they would give him the color he's looking for #the two of them live VERY exciting lives too #and i think it would be nice for shadow to end up being a bit more mundane. still here to help but in his own way.#after years of thinking youre just a weapon or you just need to dish out revenge #years of straggling and uncertainty. i think he deserves a bit of peace. like emerl/gemerl did.#etc etc etc etc also i think it would be funny for shadow and charmy to be on the same team. thank you for your time

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silentcitystreetart · 2 years

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Silent dreams shift clouds to the North encasing misted woes. A neighborhood sits in darkness, its underbelly pools below. Calling into the night is a doe lost in the haze, her antlers glow. Spreading light frequencies in stark delight.

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isotofl · 8 months

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i was cleaning my room and i saw a letter i had written to them, it was written long before we had broken up. the date was marked for april 23. i guess i had never given it to them, which wasnt surprising, because i had wrote about them a lot. i guess its because i thought of them a lot.

i read it. i studied my handwriting, i noticed how it seemed to be shaky, almost as if i couldnt stay still while i was writing about them.

oh it was so sweet, how i spoke about them.

i saw what i had written, how i described them, i saw myself in those words- thinking those thoughts, and the overflow of adoration i had previously felt was replaced with nothingness.

i couldn’t feel the warmth that was previously there.

all i could think was, "what went wrong?"

and i couldnt wrap my head around the change.

i loved them, i loved them very dearly.

and then i felt so horrible. so guilty, so wrong. so frustrated. how could i feel nothing and everything at the same time? am i taking this too seriously? does this even fucking matter?

so i looked at those words i had written, full of love that was never seen, and i wondered if i could ever feel that way again.

am i worthy of feeling that way again?

maybe in a month, i’ll take a walk. i’ll see the trees begin to shed their leaves, and i’ll learn the art of letting go with them.

maybe then i’ll be able to feel that way again.

#yippee !!#is this okay to post LMAOFNFKF #guys im not EMO i SWEAR #its gonna be okay !!#ON SUNNY DAYS I GO OUT WALKING ☹️☹️ I END UP ON A TREE-LINED STREET #why heal and grow as a person when i can cry and listen to MITSKI 😡😡#I DONT NEED THE WORLD TO SEE THAT IVE BEEN THE BEST I CAN BE ☹️#francis forever core #im actually losing it #mitski #FRANCIS FOREVER <3

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bylertruther · 1 year

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hi, friends! if you know me, then you know that i love to spread misery and pain, so please allow me to remind you all that this is a mike missing will and feeling homesick for him and terribly untethered after he moves away song<3

I don't know what to do without you I don't know where to put my hands I've been trying to lay my head down But I'm writing this at 3 a.m I don't need the world to see That I've been the best I can be, but I don't think I could stand to be Where you don't see me On sunny days, I go out walking I end up on a tree-lined street I look up at the gaps of sunlight I miss you more than anything I don't need the world to see That I've been the best I can be, but I don't think I could stand to be Where you don't see me And autumn comes when you're not yet done With the summer passing by, but I don't think I could stand to be Where you don't see me

(for extra angst sprinkled on top, listen to the acoustic version and think abt mike writing and playing a similar song tht he won't ever play for anyone bc it's much too revealing and too honest.)

#byler songs #byler #mike going from always putting his arm around will's shoulders to not being able to touch him...#mike writing letters he'll never send at 3am bc he foolishly believes if he gets the words out somehow that will would be able to hear them #somehow as he always has...#'i don't think i could stand to be where you don't see me' mike always hunching over to be at eye level with will and feeling like will had #sabotaged the day by not paying enough attention to him...#'i end up on a tree-lined street / i look up at the gaps of sunlight / i miss you more than anything' him biking to the byers old home n #soaking up the sun just because the warmth and familiarity of it all makes him feel closer to will.. like he's still there even if he won't #pick up the phone anymore and is seemingly always busy :(#and the last verse being like... literally the end of s3 the last two lines especially being him having his Realization as he watches the #byers all drive away and he bikes home to let his mother hold him as he has that guardedly blank look on his face #this song is already killer but attaching it to /them/..? dear god in heaven................. it HURTS #THE AGONY........ IT'S SO REAL...

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