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doitforbangchan · 3 months

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All Bark and No Bite 08

Another early chapter to celebrate my birthday 🥳 i am now a 25 year old child 👧 please enjoy and let me know what you think 💕

Masterlist

Series masterlist

Chan x reader (y/n) x ot8

ABO!Nonidol!SKZ Alternate Universe

Previous - Next

Series Warnings: Fem reader, Smut, verryyyy nsfw, chan x reader, OT8 x reader, A/B/O, m/m/f smut, possessive! SKZ, possessive! Reader, anxiety and depression, reader is a CRYBABY, fluff, angst, virgin!reader, cursing, violence, pet names, dom/sub dynamics, Sub reader x mostly dom SKZ, misogyny and sexism, Ateez are depicted as terrible people (sorry Atiny!)

Chapter Warnings: Smut, oral (f receiving), fingering, Hard dom! Chan, suggestive, kissing, dirty thoughts, cursing, fluff, mild dissociation, traditional gender roles, crying (as usual)

WC: 4.1k

MDNI 18+

Hyunjin could, in fact, carry you up two flights of stairs. Now you know better than to doubt his physical prowess. It seemed almost effortless to him to make the trek up with you on his back. The whole time he had you hoisted up you were able to see the muscles in his arms rippling.

It honestly made you see him in a different light. You had thought he was an attractive man- of course you did- but knowing how strong he was… It made you want to ravish him. See what other muscles he has hidden from you.

Good thing you were behind him or he would be able to see the gears turning in your mind and the flush in your cheeks.

He took you right to the closed door of your room. It was concealing whatever your ‘surprise’ was. Hyunjin gently set you down on your shaky legs, grabbing your hand once your feet touched the floor. He lifted your hand up to his mouth, placing a kiss to your palm, then leaning in close as if he was going to kiss you. Your heart was thumping out of your chest, anticipating his next move. Instead he only kissed your cheek and whispered smugly, “Don't ever doubt me again, Baby.”

You had a look of ‘wtf’ on your face but he just ignored it, choosing to turn on his heels and head back down the steps.

Before he went down he turned to you one last time.

“Oh, the surprise is from Min.” With that he gave you a wink and descended the steps.

From Minho? That felt slightly odd to you. You had gotten a feeling the beta didn’t care for you much, but maybe you were wrong. Maybe it just took him a minute to warm up to someone. Either way you weren't going to dwell on it, he had gotten you a surprise after all.

Opening the door to your room you saw many bags sitting on your bed. Not just any bags, they were bags from Euns shop! Walking into your room and closer to the bags you noticed that there were many more than the 5 bags you had before your.. Mishap. There now appeared to be at least 10 bags.

‘Did Minho get me more clothes?’ You wondered, suddenly overcome with gratitude. While you loved wearing your alphas clothes it would be nice to have some of your own, especially after Chan had literally destroyed your original outfit. You looked through the items left for you, and half of them you definitely didn't pick, but you loved each thing he had grabbed for you. You had been so worried when you were shopping that you would spend too much money, that you didn’t get all the things you had wanted. Looks like Minho paid you great attention though because he had picked things you had desperately wanted. So many pretty dresses and sets. And lingerie?

Looking at the matching bra and panty sets you just knew there was a dark red blush on your cheeks. What was new though. There were also a few strappy numbers you would usually be way too shy to buy for yourself. It made you remember that you were expected to be shared amongst the pack.

‘Did Minho want to see me in these racy outfits?’ You might actually have a heart attack at the thought.

After looking through each bag you sped yourself down the stairs to find Minho. You went down to the second floor where you remembered his room being, finding the door open and him not there.

You did take a moment to peer inside, though. His room was decorated in deep purples, and had a thick shag rug that almost surrounded the entire room. The space felt very mature and had a lingering scent of the beta.

Your eyes were starting to close at the intense smell of him, a musky spice that was almost intoxicating. You snapped yourself out of it before you fell too deep into a subspace. No time for that you were on a mission! Next stop was the kitchen.

You barreled down the next flight of steps, almost tumbling a few times due to your still weak legs, and onto the main floor. You could hear a few soft voices coming from the living room but none sounded like the man you were after. There was a smell of something cooking coming from the kitchen, and when you stepped into the large room there was Minho. He was there stirring some vegetables on the stove.

He seemed to have heard you enter but before he could greet you, you launched yourself at him pulling him into a hug and smothering your face against his shirt. He seemed stunned for a moment- putting his hands in the air like he was afraid to touch you. It took him a second before he felt himself relax in your hold.

“Fank you fo the clofes” Your words were almost incoherent against him but he managed to understand. With one hand he patted your head while the other leaned past you and continued stirring the food he was preparing.

“You needed them. It’s no big deal.” He responded evenly, as if his heart wasn’t beating wildly.

You pulled back from him with those signature tears “No big deal? Of course it is! You went out of your way for me! And got me even more! I am so grateful to you Minho! I don’t know how to thank you for your kindness.”

He gave you a small smirk, “You know how you can thank me?” You looked at him with hopeful eyes, shaking your head no.

“Wipe those pretty tears off your face.” He responded with a small pat to your cheek before turning his attention back to the food.

You sniffled one more time before nodding and using your palms to wipe your face. It was then that your omega brain noticed he was cooking. That was your job!

“What are you doing?” You demanded. “I’m supposed to be cooking for you!” You then tried to shove him out of the way but he wasn’t budging. He was surprisingly sturdy. All he did was laugh in response.

Your lips curled into a pout and you crossed your arms angrily, giving him your best evil eye. It did not phase him at all, instead he just laughed again shaking his head and continuing to cook. You wouldn’t give in though! If the glare wouldn’t work you would try being sweet.

Unfolding your arms you clasped your hands out in front of you and gave him your best puppy dog pout.

“Please Min.” You stepped closer to him and rested your head against his shoulder. “It makes me feel useless if I can’t provide something for you guys.”

Minho felt himself tense up when you touched him again. For some reason your touch was making him nervous. That is until he registered your words.He turned to you with a sternness on his face.

“Don’t say that.” His voice was borderline harsh. You looked up at him shocked when you heard it. He continued a little softer after seeing your expression, “ You’re not useless, you provide enough”

‘Or you're going to start soon enough.’ He thought to himself.

“I like cooking, it's calming to me. If you really want we can split it up and I’ll let you make breakfasts and the occasional dinner.”

Your eyes shined at the prospect of being allowed to contribute, nodding your head rapidly. You would take anything you could get. “Yes! Thank you Minho!” You hugged him again quickly before skipping out of the kitchen, happy with the agreement.

The beta called out after you “Tell everyone 5 minutes til’ dinner!”

“You got it!”

Wandering back into the living room Felix and Jisung were still lazily strewn on the loveseat but now Changbin and Jeongin were also in there, the group playing Mario kart on the switch that was hooked up to the tv. You stood in the entryway for a moment watching them play.

It brought back memories of you playing games with your siblings, back when things were simpler. It felt like they were, anyway. You had a pretty normal childhood all things considered. You had a good relationship with your siblings, you had friends, you were doing well in school- fuck, you were even planning on going to college to become a zoologist. You were happy.

That all changed for you the second you turned 16, when you presented as an omega and had to forget about ever having a normal life.

You must have been stuck pretty far in your own mind because you didn’t hear Changbin calling your name until he touched your arm in concern.

“Huh?” You asked as you snapped out of it.

The alpha had a look of worry etched on his face, “You’ve been standing there in a daze for a few minutes, Baby. Are you ok?” His rough hand cupped your cheek and you leaned into it comfortingly.

You nodded, “Mmhmm. Sorry, just thinking.” Then you looked past him at everyone in the room, “Minho said dinner was about done.” As you said Changbins stomach let out a loud gurgle, causing the other boys present to burst into chuckles.

Changbin released your face with a wide grin, “Why didn’t you say so!” Then he cupped his hands over his mouth to project into the entire house.

“DINNER TIME EVERYONE!”

You giggled at his antics and everyone made their way into the dining room to enjoy a meal together.

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Dinner was a quieter affair, it seems like everyone was still mellowed out since the joint nap you all took, the tiredness still present. That's not to say it wasn't full of jokes, that will never stop. By the time you had all eaten and cleaned up it was now quite dark outside, the light completely disappearing behind the mountains.

Even though you slept away most of the day you could still feel the drowsiness behind your eyes. You were sitting in Chan's lap with your head resting against his chest while he joked with the other guys, the tv on in the background but no one was paying any attention to it.

Your alpha had his hand on your thigh, rubbing slow circles into your warm skin. He could sense you slipping away every now and again, and had decided it was time to take you to bed. You had a big day tomorrow, anyways.

“Are you ready for bed, omega?” He whispered against your hair, placing a kiss there.

You gave him a slow nod, “Mmhmm.” He scooped you up into his arms and stood from where you were both seated on the recliner.

“Say goodnight to the boys, baby.”

You lightly lifted your hand and gave them a wave, “Goodnight boys.”

“Goodnight, Baby!” They chorused, with Jisung adding in a little “I’ll miss you!” there at the end.

The tired giggle you let out almost made their hearts stop beating. It was so cute. “Miss you too Ji.”

Chan carried you up the stairs and into his room where he set you gently in his bed. You immediately nuzzled yourself into his comforter. He spoke softly to you, “Before you fall asleep there's something we have to talk about, Baby.”

There was a sudden inkling of anxiety in your stomach. Have you done something wrong? Were you being too much? What if he- You were brought out of your thoughts by Chan placing a chaste kiss on your mouth.

“I can almost see your brain running a million miles an hour, nothing is wrong Omega.” You felt yourself relax at his reassurance. “I was actually going to check in with you, about how you are feeling about the pack. And about what we had discussed a few days ago.” His hands were back on your thighs, the heat of his strong hands igniting something inside of you. “The other boys are quite fond of you, you know that baby?” He was staring deep into your eyes, smirking as if he could see how his hands were making you feel.

“I-I like them too.” You stuttered. you kept your answer vague, scared if you revealed how they make you truly feel it would upset the Alpha.

He hummed, his hands hiking up even higher-inching closer and closer to your core. He paused his movements, “ How much do you like them, my love? Do you like them enough to let them touch you like this?”

You were apprehensive to answer him, so he pressed further. “You know, if you're worried I’d be mad or jealous, that’s not something you have to be concerned about. In fact, I would prefer it if you wanted them like they want you.” He smirked at the hitch in your breath.

“And how do they want me, Alpha?” The words were almost a whisper as they left you, your tone breathy.

Chan let out a purr, “ They want you in all the ways I do.” His hands inched up ever closer but still not reaching. He leaned in close, his mouth almost on yours.

“Will you let them have you? Will you be a good omega and please your pack?”

The hesitancy was gone from you as you rapidly nodded at his questions, desperate for him.

“Yes Alpha. They can have all of me. Whatever they want I will give to them.”

“Good girl.” He praised, slotting his mouth over yours and finally letting his fingers find your core. The rough pads of his fingertips lightly rubbed over your (his) underwear, feeling the accumulating wetness that was making a dark spot. You let out a stuttering moan at his touch, hips instinctually raising to meet the touch.

He hummed, grinning devilishly “ Does my sweet omega like that?” He pressed harder against your pussy, pushing the fabric between your folds.

Nodding quickly you responded “Yes Alpha.”

Chan then placed his lips back on yours, his hand pulling away and finding the band of the underwear. He hooked his thumbs under each side and slowly dragged the garment down your thighs, his tongue running along the inside of your lips begging for entrance. You gave it to him gladly.

Once he had completely pulled the boxers from you he pulled his lips back slightly, still touching but not kissing. “You’re still too sore to take me, but I just have to reward my baby for being such a good girl.” His lips starting trailing wet kisses down your throat and continuing down your stomach where he lifted his shirt to reveal your breasts to him.

You were squirming in at his touch, eager to feel his mouth on you where you needed him most.

The alpha settled himself between your legs, spreading your thighs to make room for him. You were absolutely leaking. The crystalline liquid drips out of you causing the room to fill with the scent of you.

“Who made you like this, Baby?” He asked in between sloppy kisses to your thighs.

“Yo-you did, alpha.” You responded, panting in anticipation.

“Hmmm just me?” His eyes found yours, as if challenging your words. “ Are you sure about that?”

You paused, trying to find an answer. “Umm..”

He nipped at your soft thigh skin, leaving a red mark in his wake. “ You can be honest with me, omega. Have you thought about any of the other boys this way? Thought about any of them putting their mouths on your wet little pussy?” His tongue stuck out and he gave your clit a teasing lick.

“Alpha please.” There was no way you could answer that. You were too mortified at the prospect.

He growled at your avoidance “ Answer me, omega. You will get nothing if you don’t tell me what I want to hear. Do you think about them eating you like this?” He gave you another bite on the opposite side.

“Yes!” You couldn’t take it anymore. Morals be damned. “Yes, Alpha I have. m’ sorry!” Hands gripping the sheets below you.

At your honesty Chan licked a long strip starting at your hole up to your clit. The moan you let out was otherworldly, your hands finding his dark hair and yanking on the strands.

You tasted divine. Like the sweetest nectar from the ripest fruits. Chan felt his eyes roll to the back of his head at the taste.

“Please, alpha.” You begged, wanting- needing - to feel him again. At your pleads he dove into you, his tongue shoving its way into you looking for more of your sweetness. His lips found the little bundle of nerves and wrapped around it giving it a harsh suck.

“FUCK!” You bucked your hips, shoving him further into your pussy.

In retaliation he nipped at your clit and let out a deep growl, a glare in his eyes as they found yours. “Stay still or I will stop and leave you here with nothing. Do you understand me?”

You let out a quiet “Mmhmm” and his fingers came up to replace his mouth, rubbing tight circles on you.

“Tell me who you’ve thought about this with, baby?”

Your own hands left his hair and covered your face in embarrassment. “I can’t. It’s too much.”

Chans other hand that wasn't on your core reached up and roughly yanked your hands from your face, him now gripping the underside of your chin to turn your head to face him. Your eyes now locked on his as if he was seeing into your soul looking for answers.

“You will tell me, omega.” He was using an alpha command on you, since you were bonded to him you couldn’t refuse no matter how much you wanted too.

“Jisung.” You cried. “Was t-thinking about it earlier, Alpha.” More slick was leaking out of you at your admittance. This display of dominance shouldn’t turn you on as much as it does.

Chan gave you that predatory grin, pleased with your answer. “Sungie huh? How did

I know it was gonna be him. Good omega.”

He returned his mouth to you, this time with renewed vigor. His finger found its way inside of you, rubbing your walls with the calloused digit while his lips sucked you into the next dimension.

You were squealing and moaning, unable to contain the animalistic sounds that escaped you. The knot in your stomach was starting to form, all you needed was one push and you would be a goner. As if he could sense it, Chan slipped another finger inside of you causing you to topple over the edge.

You came with a long drawn out moan, Chan not letting up for even a second until your convulsions ceased. He wanted to drain you dry and that's what he had done.

Once you stopped shaking and were finally able to catch your breath Chan pulled away from you- his face soaked with your essence. “You taste so good, omega.” His fingers slipped out of you and he lifted them to your mouth. “Go on, taste yourself.” He urged. Your mouth opened wide enough for him to stick the digits in. Your tongue swirled around them, collecting the wetness. He couldn't help himself, he shoved his fingers further down your throat holding them there while you gagged around him. You didn’t fight him though, and just let him do whatever he pleased with you, like the good little doll you were.

Chan pressed a sweet peck to your stomach before removing his fingers from your mouth and crawling up to be face to face with you. When he was at eye level you grabbed him forcefully, connecting your lips with him and tasting more of your juices that lingered on his mouth.

He was the first to pull away after a few seconds, nuzzling your noses together and just breathing each other in.

“You did so good for me, baby. Thank you for being honest with me.” He was running his hands softly along your sides.

“You’re welcome alpha.” You responded quietly. “You’re not mad are you?”

He would have scoffed if you weren't so fragile right now.

“No baby of course not. It makes me happy you want him like that.”

Your shining eyes looked hopeful, “It does?”

“Mmm yes baby. You are theirs just as you are mine. Soon you’ll come to see it that way too.” You nodded at his words, the exhaustion now taking over. “Let's get you tucked in. You have a big day tomorrow. We have a few things to do in town tomorrow.” You nodded once more and let him tuck you in under his blankets. He placed a delicate smooch on your lips then forehead, and you were out like a light.

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Once you were asleep Chan sent a group text for a pack meeting out on the back patio. It was a warm night and he didn’t need you snooping in on this conversation if you were to wake up. He watched you slumber for a moment, taking in your peaceful features. He really did feel so lucky to have you. Everyday you proved yourself to be his dream girl.

He gave it another moment then made his way down the steps and outside where the other members were waiting for him, lounging on the outside furniture.A few of them gave the elder sly smiles, they could all hear exactly what the alpha had just been doing with you. Chan just rolled his eyes and smirked at their looks.

Chan took a seat on the ottoman by the sliding door, “Alright, I was wondering if anyone had any more problems we need to work through.” He scanned everyone's faces, “ I know it hasn’t been the smoothest of sailing the last few days but I think from here on out it will be better for everyone.” There were nods of agreement at his words.

Changbin was the first to speak, “How is she settling in? I hope we haven't been too.. Abrasive.”

Seungmin snorted, “That's rich coming from you.”

The alpha looked at him incredulously, “I am not that bad! Not as bad as your other fellow betas!” and pointed to Felix, Jisung and Hyunjin who all looked at him in disbelief at being called out.

“Hey, that's not fair! We’re a sensitive bunch and she's a sensitive girl! She needs us!” Hyunjin protested, the other two nodding furiously in agreement.

“Yeah she likes our kisses!” Jisung chimed in, then looked to Chan for confirmation. “Right hyung?”

“That’s another reason I wanted to call you all out here. Turns out she’s not as innocent as she lets on. She’s been having quite naughty thoughts about you boys.” Chan's smirk never left his face as he spoke. He watched each one of them have a reaction at his words.

Jeongin sputtered out “Is-is that okay with you Chan?” He was nervous his leader would change his mind and now be mad about it.

“Oh more than ok Innie.” Chan reassured him. “I have a feeling soon enough our little omega is going to be pretty insatiable and to be honest it would be a lot easier for me to have others to help take care of her needs. I mean, fuck, especially during her next heat it will be nice to have some help. My dick is still raw from that little minx.”

There was a collective groan at the prospect. They would have given anything to be there for the first one.

“While we’re talking about it there are a few things i want to discuss. As far as a claiming bite goes, it would be ok with me if you did bite her. Just not on the neck. And no cumming in her until we get her on some non-harmful birth control. I’d like to have time with her before we bring kids into the equation.”

They all nodded in understanding, agreeing with the alpha.

“Has she said who she's thought about, Channie?” Felix questioned with a dark flush on his face.

Chan tosses his head back and forth as if pondering the question, before answering teasingly “I may have gotten one out of her.” The beta looked hopeful. “Buuuuut I think I’ll let you guys figure it out.”

Felix pouted, crossing his arms. Minho was sat next to him and pinched his cheek, cooing at the younger beta.

“Aww lixie don’t pout. You know it's probably you.”

The red in Felixs’ cheeks darkened even more as he smacked Minhos hand away.

“I think it’s me!” Changbin boasted

“Nah, you should have seen her face after I carried her up the stairs earlier. Gotta be me.” Hyunjin said convincingly.

The boys just went back and forth, all trying to figure out who is the first one to catch your attention, not knowing it was literally all of them.

It was pure entertainment for Chan and Minho as they watched the others bicker.

Comments and reblogs are very much appreciated!

©doitforbangchan

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a-d-nox · 7 months

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it was my birthday yesterday: predicting my 23rd year based on my solar return chart

i think this is fun to do, so feel free to comment or reblog what you think will happen this year to me based on my chart, while i make my own predictions for my solar return chart. feel free to treat this as a solar return observation post! perhaps next year i will come back and see if my predictions were correct!

first things first i have to point out this is a 2023/2024 chart i always get funny looks for this but hi i turned 23 on october 27th, 2023 (this year my solar return starts the 28th because of the eclipse - i suspect) why would i look at a 2024 solar return that takes place october 27th, 2024 - i would be 24 then? so from this point on EVEN WHEN WE ARE IN 2024 i will be referring to the 2023 chart for the solar return year. make sure you verify your stuff before looking at your solars.

1H IN LIBRA AT 12° (contains: scorpio sun and narcissus (37117))

prediction: there is likely to be a relational focus this year and with venus (the house ruler) in the 12h it is likely to be with myself (what us my relationship with my self? how can i better treat myself? etc). my diplomacy skills are likely not going to be the best as i look at the 10h/11h, what is sitting in those houses, and that pisces degree on my 1h... with my scorpio sun present in the house, it is likely that it will be obvious that i trust no one this year (people may suspect that i only trust myself - they could feel as though i look down on them or think little of them). my sun is opposite my moon so i might feel a bit disconnected from myself... with my sun in the 1h, i will likely have a super intense vibe (not that i don't already) but in a way that seems like magnetism because it is a libra 1h? like drawing others in? i do feel like this year is going to be the sort where i am discovering who i am and who i want to be (i just have to make sure it doesn't get out of hand with the sun and narcissus (especially with his conjunction to my sun, mercury, and mars) present).

2H IN SCORPIO AT 9° (contains: scorpio mercury, mars, and kassandra (114) AND sagittarius educatio (2440) and pythia (432))

prediction: what an interesting mix of stuff i have here... money makes the world go round this year i guess. my mercury is at 9° and my mars is at 11° - can i just cry a little...? bro wtf is bitcoin and why do i feel like i am gonna get into the world of online investing...? the coupling of these two planets (especially mars as the 2h ruler) makes me feel as though i will be making money and spending it or moving it relatively quick so that i can't use it? i say "i can't use it" because my mars opposes jupiter which makes me think of compounding interest like a CD... anywho, i am a money wizard? i have kassandra and pythia here, so i feel like i will probably make investments and use my money in unexpected ways (kassandra makes me think of emergency funds OR bad financial contracts though). i also have educatio here so at least i will be learning more about financial literacy plus i do think with mercury i will be extremely interested in learning more about finances. and with mars... it might just become a new passion of mine... aside from money, while i am likely to continue a lot of giving and receiving of knowledge this next year on social media (mercury things), there is a danger to the realm of social media... ESPECIALLY with mars present and both mercury and mars conjunct my sun then all three opposing jupiter... my self worth could take a hit which i do not look forward to.

3H IN SAGITTARIUS AT 10° (contains: sagittarius ambrosia (193), asclepius (4581), cupido (763), jormungandr (471926) rx, lev tolstoj (2810), and zeus (5731) AND capricorn aphrodite (1388) and chekhov (2369))

prediction: sagittarius and 10° for the 3h is giving "it's all fun and games until someone says/mentions ____". i have to be mindful of my mouth because while i am likely to make people feel alive with my words given ambrosia and asclepius in this house, i also have chekhov (where you want simplicity but receive drama), aphrodite, and jormungandr (where people try to end you - aka getting socially outcasted/cancelled) in the 3h... but lev tolstoj is here too so whatever i am saying that offends others or makes them mad is facts even though there is drama/gossip involved when i do say these things... the dangers of social media part 2? i feel like it may be romantic drama because zeus (i am not a zeus person because there are no aspects to the sun or asc - only a square is made from this asteroid to my venus), cupido, and aphrodite (and for aphrodite there are no aspects made to my inner planets this solar return - so it is definitely not me doing something sus like cheating) are here in the house too. i do have my suspicions as to what is happening already... and oh shiiii will it hurt because 10° is always a bit painful in my opinion. especially with the house ruler in the 8h... it just looks like emotional damage...

4H IN CAPRICORN AT 14° (contains: capricorn pluto, balder (4059), and bellerophon (1808)

prediction: a lot of my astro friends who see this chart are like "oh are you moving?" and i am like ABSOLUTELY NOT. like i literally just moved so no. unfortunately (i hate to be this person) i do believe a beloved family member (4h balder conjunct pluto and square moon) will be passing this year. even more unfortunate - i do not think it will be an easy death with bellerophon present because he was thrown from pegasus... and not to be super disgusting, but i do believe i will inherit something expensive and very material given the earthy grand trine formed by pluto, venus, and uranus. that being said i feel like i might neglect my mental health because pluto squares my moon - i might stopping going to therapy (currently i see a therapist regarding my childhood ptsd). i might regress into people pleasing behaviors because it is all that i will be able to control if someone in my family passes... which is not the healthiest for me.

5H IN AQUARIUS AT 17° (contains: pisces saturn, amor (1221) rx, and karma (3811))

prediction: this seems like a good mix for me achieving something big with writing/blogging. especially because saturn is the traditional ruler of aquarius and capricorn (which is home - the work i do from home, a side hustle). my outlook for romance is not too good with amor in retrograde in this house nor with freedom loving aquarius ruling this house. not to mention i feel like the world will be showing me something that will cause me to have a grudge against love (saturn) and karma will be dished out. this could also be a sign that my childhood trauma could be triggered again with saturn in the 5h too (great).

6H IN PISCES AT 17° (contains: pisces neptune rx, AND aries heracles (5143) rx and salacia (120347) rx)

prediction: i appreciate the that neptune is retrograde in this pisces house... last thing i wanted was for my health, routine, or hygiene to be confusing/frustrating, avoided, or to constantly be behind / running late / neglected. so this is fine by me. i might be obsessive with scheduling, health, and hygiene because jupiter (this house's other ruler) is in the 8h. it seems like the job hunt is at a standstill with heracles in retrograde - instead, i might get one great option that i take and stick to with given salacia in retrograde.

7H IN ARIES AT 12° (contains: aries nn, chiron rx, part of fortune, pandora (55) rx, and signe (459) rx AND taurus moon and vertex)

prediction: it's a toss up as to what all this could mean. i could find myself in a very emotionally charged connection (this is the eclipse moon after all) - with chiron rx it could be the healing of past wounds. the combination of vertex, part of fortune, and north node dictates that any relationship/partnership i find myself in could be extremely significant. with pandora here i feel like it might be unexpected where this relationship will come from. WITH SIGNE HERE i feel like some people may look down on who i this person is...

8H IN TAURUS AT 9° (contains: taurus jupiter rx and uranus rx)

prediction: oof not my 8h ruler in the 12h - what's that screaming i hear lol? maybe i will be afraid of change - i mean that because of the 12h venus and jupiter retrograde... the combination doesn't really express embracing change and the unknown, you know? the uranus retrograde makes me think i will be moving away from shared finances and working on managing my own money. i definitely believe it is for the best that i keep my opportunities to myself... i don't get the sense people will be supportive of my wins - i more so sense the envy of others from this house. i don't think i will be shocked by my successes, but i feel like others will not see it coming...

9H IN GEMINI AT 10° (contains: gemini midas (1981) AND cancer arachne (407) and odysseus (1143))

prediction: mmmm the contemplation to go back to school is real this coming year. it's weird because it might not be for my MFA? like the 9h midas sextile chiron is giving paralegal? nursing? idk but it's not feeling literary oriented... especially with cancer arachne present, i feel like that is nursing/medical-esque... alternatively, midas can be extreme change then add in odysseus, the traveler - i could be going on a trip that changes my life entirely.

10H IN CANCER AT 14° (contains: cancer ajax (1404), hannibal (2152), and loke (4862) AND leo agamemnon (911) and arthur (2597))

prediction: it's a REAL toss up how this house will manifest. i feel like sometimes people will love me and find my presence comforting and other times they will hate me and be annoyed by me. this is thanks to the moon ruler in the 7h... and ajax (who squares my chiron)... and agamemnon (who squares my moon)... i say ajax because i think of my 3h this year - i am falling on my own sword in that regard for sure because not everyone will like what i have to say especially when it is likely to be true (3h sag is starting to remind me of a verbal burn). while people are likely to look up to me (10h arthur AND hannibal) or be forced to - because of my status, they are likely to despise me for what i say/said (7h moon AND mercury and jupiter (3h ruler) square arthur). meanwhile, it might not even be me who is the problem i just look like the bad guy for making it more apparent like loki (10h loke).

11H IN LEO AT 17° (contains: leo charybdis (388), helena (101), and hestia (46) AND virgo beowulf (38086), juno (3), lacrimosa (208), and silentium (2710))

prediction: i feel like my popularity is going to be a thing / where i am on the social status food chain (high up). but i don't believe i can trust anyone this year... i feel like i am likely to reach big social media milestones with beowulf in this house (and this house being in leo at 17°) - social media might even take over my life a little bit (11h charybis). i do feel like friendships will be very love hate with juno and hestia here - i am likely to be a moderator of sorts but with helena here i feel like someone is going to accuse me of being disloyal because of how i am likely to moderate without bias. i might find myself truly alone again this year because of it (11h lacrimosa and silentium).

12H IN VIRGO AT 17° (contains: virgo venus)

prediction: greatttt i thought we were passed this but i guess not.... looks like i still need to work on my self esteem... intuitively, i don't sense social media is going to be kind to me, and i really hope that doesn't mean here. like i am okay if it is instagram (that app is dying anyway) but like here and tiktok are my favorite apps to be in. when bullying is involved though and it is consistent, there is a limitation to that favoritism in which it becomes apprehension to stay for something like a social media in comparison to showing up for myself. there could also be delusions in romance with this set up - i could experience over thinking in a romantic connections with that 12h virgo venus too. karmic relationships are highly probable with this placement too. OR it could be an ex becoming an enemy too (unknown enemies my a$$)...

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yuri-is-online · 27 days

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just finished the sinostra chapter and... god taiga is so unhinged, i desperately want to know what his deal is. Constantly forgets stuff, has strange shifts in mood even the characters call out... (and having a TORTURE CHAMBER in his room wtf). Romeo also grew on me way more than I thought he would- tbh I think he's my fav Sinostra ghoul, there's something so funny about him just trying to do things somewhat properly and then everyone else ruins shit for him constantly. Save him. And Haru!!! The way he gushes about MC... god I knew there was a reason he's one of my favs... he's just so sweet. Also, justice for Like Dove. It did not deserve that fate. RIP lil birb, you shall be missed...

I have a lot of thoughts about Taiga (only some of them inappropriate), and so so many questions. Like for example, he is a third year but his record of completing missions comes from his first year, if I understand what Ristu said correctly. Speaking of Ristu, he intends to review all of the school's records about the Clash so I am curious to see if that's information he will share with us. He has decided we are business partners apparently, so I should think so and since he also works with Leo (if I am correct and that's who Leo texted about Alan's criminal record) then I can see the three of us joining up at some point. I also want to know if MC is going to work with Taiga about the spy or if she is going to keep that to herself. What I don't want her to do is tell Ristu because I do not trust that dumbass to keep his mouth shut, but I could see it making a degree of sense to do that since he is already looking in to the Clash...

Taiga makes an off handed comment about Romeo I almost didn't catch when Ritsu is explaining who and what he is. Something about "a lawyer is like what Lulu's family was like before they fucked it up" so (p_-) very very interesting if you ask me. People who insist on spending money on very expensive things that aren't lolita are very exhausting to me so I was very tired with Romeo the entire time he was talking i think he should get on lace market and calm down. He had very much grown on me by the end too, he's a business man and he was appropriately concerned when MC was injured. There's nothing massively offensive about him. Well outside of his acronym use, do you think he has considered being a twitch streamer? Probably not I feel like he has some dignity.

Haruuuuuuu (˃̣̣̥ᴖ˂̣̣̥) he deserves the world and I am more than willing to give it to him. I hope MC keeps helping him with the anomalous sanctuary. He's so overworked his favorite thing is energy drinks, pls bby we need to get you real food and a nap.

Seeing Taiga eat the like dove awakened something in me ngl... he's so paranoid and frustrated he eats the physical manifestation of love raw instead of confronting things normally... and allowing himself to feel... I am probably reading in to things too much but hey. I have a tumblr blog so it's kind of what I do.

#<3 asks #tokyo debunker #tdb #tdb sinostra #taiga hoshibami #romeo lucci

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bitchesgetriches · 8 months

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Dear bitches,

I'm in college and trying to find a laptop/tablet to buy. I don't know shit about computers though and have just used chromebooks for a bunch of my life, meaning that all I'm seeing is people online going "buy an ipad! It has apps you need!" Or "if you can save up $200, you can save up $1500 for a basic laptop. at least." and I don't know wtf is up with that.

I know what i want from it (basic functions of a chromebook but also works as a good tablet for notetaking) and all the advice around seems to be for hardcore people.. I don't have much money and it seems like it's either "get a kindle, poor person" or "go into debt, you poor bitch" and all that makes me want to do is either avoid it entirely or impulse purchase the first thing I get recommended and spend too much. What am I supposed to do when I feel like I'm a clueless buyer at a cars sales lot with 200 sales people

My darling child, this is so annoying yet stressful. Sorry you're going through it!

Here's our advice: find what you want, then look for a "refurbished model." This is literally a way to buy a used computer, and you can get steeply discounted but perfectly fine computers this way.

I got a refurbished MacBook Pro for about $900 a few years ago. It's still going strong. $900 is a lot of money... but it's way less than what I would've had to pay to get that computer brand new.

Also, keep in mind that a lot of folks who write about computers on the internet are fanatics. If all you need is internet access and MS Office... don't worry so much about the other functionality. A basic model will do.

Ask the Bitches: How Can I Absolve Myself of Financial Guilt Over My Pricey PS4?

Did we just help you out? Tip us!

#buying a computer #making a large purpose #how to buy a computer without going into debt

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babiebom · 11 months

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Abigail Headcanons

I had wrote some of these for my old blog but forgot to save them so i forgot what i wrote and now I have to start over haha

Tw: cursing, brief sexual mention, cheating(not abby), some canon info may be wrong lmao

Is between 5'4-5'8

Mostly because she does give off tall goth mommy vibes but also gives off short angry troll vibes(I'm 4'11 I'm allowed to say this)

I think she's like 22-24

It's stayed at some point that she takes online college classes right? Or am i insane?

I do 100% think she's the wizards daughter I mean it does line up and if she's not then wtf

It's more than just the hair

But even then like isn't it said that she only dyed it ONCE and the color just never went away?

Like I feel like its one of those things where she had to activate the trait for it to show up

Like Idk if you've seen Barbie in a (and a?) Mermaid Tale but like

Barbie(her name isn't barbie but i cant remember what it is) doesn't show any mermaid traits at all until shes a certain age then she does things to trigger it(like going in the water and being able to breathe or her hair turning pink.)

Or traits that have been there already now making sense(her being obsessed with the water and surfing)

For Abigail, she just needed to dye her hair that specific color in order for it to stay in that state

And she has other abilities like being able to see the Junimos when literally no one else but the farmer and the wizard can.

And her love of adventure and the unknown

And i think she is a witchy girl along with Emily

Also the fact that Caroline hung out near the wizards tower then got pregnant with Abby

I think she still hangs out there sometimes or maybe its a mod or maybe I'm delusional(this one is a fact)

N e ways i've gone on too long about this

I think she would study for something like archaeology or something or like game development.

Does play video games as much as she can

Does rage quit

Gets angry when she dies

Though its canon that Abby and Seb would end up together if not with the farmer(I think?)

Highkey a toxic gamer but her outbursts are funny so it's allowed

I think she likes games like Undertale, the Sonic games, Mario, hates Valorant with a passion but still plays even though it only makes her angry

I feel like her feelings for him are shallow

Not in a bad way

But in a theres no one else for me to realistically end up with or crush on type thing

Like unless she's going to date one of the girls(I think Pierre is homophobic) Seb is her only choice

I do sorta ship her with Haley tho (goth gf x pink gf)

Does wish to be in the adventurers guilde but i also think she would be terrified

Also realistically I feel like she knows it wouldn't work out for long. Though she does sometimes go in the upper(lower?) levels of the mines.

100 percent prefers her mom to her dad

I think if she ever found out about the wizard possibly being her father it would make her be the most torn she has ever been

Because on one hand she does love pierre hes the man that raised her and I dont think she would accept cheating AT ALL and it would hurt her to know hes not her biological father

But on the other hand she would find it cool that theres a reason for her weirdness

Like theres a reason she can see the weird creatures in the forest when no one else can(to her knowledge)

Theres a reason for her longing to venture out and explore the unknown

And the wizard is pretty freaking cool seeing as she hangs out next to his tower often

Either showers everyday or once every 3 days there's no in between

Probably does want to travel at some point, maybe when she has her own money to spend.

If pierre wanted her to take over his store when he gets too old she would refuse

Is sorta sad she doesn't have any siblings, but at the same is glad because she only has to worry about herself

Learned to play the drums as a way to let out her anger

Has an okay voice when singing, but doesn't know how to properly hit notes without fucking up her voice

#stardew valley #sdv #stardew #sdv abigail #stardew abigail #stardew valley abigail #stardew headcanon #stardew valley headcanons #sdv headcanons #abigail headcanons #sdv abigail headcanons #stardew abigail headcanons #stardew valley abigail headcanons #sdv shitpost #stardew shitpost #stardew valley shitpost

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heartsoulrocknroll · 3 months

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Streetlife Serenade Ranked

Since this album is apparently vastly underrated, allow me to start this by saying that I absolutely love every song on this album. There isn't one that doesn't do it for me.

1) The Entertainer

I don't think I can adequately describe how much I love this song. I have always been so blown away by it. The instrumentation is so masterfully done, and each verse gradually builds on the last. There is the opening acoustic guitar, then that iconic synth riff that later repeats between verses throughout the song. The acoustic guitar continues on its own for the first verse, then the drums and bass come in on the second verse, then the steel guitar comes in on the third verse, then the banjo on the fourth verse, then the fantastic piano on the fifth verse. Then they all come together for the big crescendo of the sixth and seventh verses, while Billy absolutely goes nuts vocally. The cynical lyrics are some of the best that Bill has ever written, and I have always been obsessed with the rhyme scheme he used. It's poetic in a way that is reminiscent of Piano Man, but more impressive. Also shout out to the lost verse, which I love so much.

2) Weekend Song

This is an absolutely fantastic rock 'n' roll song, and I just love it more and more with time. I love that guitar riff, as well as the organ toward the end. I am obsessed with the gospely, bluesy piano riffs that are reminiscent of Ain't No Crime. And I think this is one of the best vocal performances Bill ever gave. I mean wtf!!!!!! He is so good, it makes me angry. I have seen this song compared to Take Me to the Pilot, but I won't go there other than to say eat your heart out, Elton. All those comparisons, but one thing Elton and Leon could definitely never do is sing like the great Billy Joel.

3) The Great Suburban Showdown

This is one of my favorite Billy Joel vocal melodies. It's one of those songs that just gets me right in my soul. The combination of the beautiful synth solos, the fantastic piano, the wistful pedal steel guitar, and the nostalgic lyrics alone would make me a little emotional, but add Billy's gorgeous vocal, and this song can easily bring me to the verge of tears.

4) Root Beer Rag

This is an incredible ragtime piano piece that sticks in my head for days after hearing it. I love everything about it, but I particularly love the part containing the dissonant, alternating major and minor seconds that comes out of nowhere and contrasts fantastically with the rest of the song. And I really love listening to live performances of this song and hearing Bill play it as fast as humanly possible, challenging the band to keep up.

5) Last of the Big Time Spenders

This is a song that I never hear anyone talk about, and I'm not sure why. I am obsessed with the piano on this song. It has a great, sort of jazz/blues flavor that provides an interesting juxtaposition to the country undertones of the pedal steel guitar. Bill has some incredible, soulful vocals here. And I think the lyrics are so clever, with the comparison of spending money and spending time. It's just a great song all around, and I think it leads really nicely into Weekend Song, which comes next on the album and has a similar feel.

6) Los Angelenos

This is an awesome rock song that goes harder than a lot of the songs on Glass Houses, with a great combination of electric piano, electric guitar, bass, excellent vocals by Billy, and some vintage, sardonic Billy Joel lyrics.

7) Roberta

I love the prominence of the piano on this song. The piano throughout the whole song is beautiful, but I especially love the intro and the piano break before the last verse. This seems to be a theme of this album, but there are more particularly great vocals from Billy here as well.

8) Streetlife Serenader

I absolutely love the classical sound of the piano in this song. The intro is just gorgeous. Billy's vocal here is great, and the rare appearance of his falsetto is delightful to me.

9) Souvenir

This song is short and sweet, but it is so good. The melody is gorgeous, the piano intro/outro is beautiful, and the wistful lyrics can really make me emotional.

10) The Mexican Connection

This is a beautiful, relaxing piece of music. I love all the piano work here and how it is complemented by the guitar, the congas, the organ, and, later on, the marimba. I especially love the big crescendo of piano chords at 2:03.

#billy joel #streetlife serenade #personal

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candied-boys · 6 months

Text

@stardazzler thank you so much for coming out of hiding to ask about Luke 😭 he's my bestest boi everrrrr

So I'll give you a summary of everything I can recall from the "My fiancee has turned into a kid and she's got me wrapped around her finger" event below the cut

So Luke walks in on a kid facing off with chevalier in a staring contest when suddenly she bursts out in tears.

Luke: "wtf bro? Whadya do to the kid?"

Chev: nothing. Hmph.

Luke: who are you and where'd you come from anyway?

Emma: I'm emma! And I dunno. I just woke up in the palace? Maybe this is a dream.

Luke: huh.. yeah a dream. Okay I can buy that. The fact that you look just like my gf and have the same name definitely has dream written all over it...

Luke: So what did the big meanie do, bb? What's wrong?

Emma: the book!

Luke: Book? What book?

Emma: I wanna see the book...

Chev: hands over book and walks away with a big hrmph.

Insert Clavis and Jin!!!

Clavis: is that Luke's secret love child?!

Jin: oh!!! Can we call him papa Luke now? I wanna be papa Jin 😎

Luke: oh fml.... Not these two... They are the absolute worst influence a kid could ever have!!!! Mr pranks and mr only-eats-candy. Oh no. They are not getting within an inch of this kid!!!

Luke: you see those two, bb emma?

Emma: yeah?

Luke: take a good look cuz if you ever see guys like that, RUN. got it?

Emma: Run. Got it. 🫡🫡🫡

Jin + clavis: 😰😰😰😰😰😰😰🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡😢😢😢😢😢😢🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠

(Safely) Back at Luke's room...

Luke: so what's this book about anyway? *Reads cover* ECONOMICS?!?!

Emma: Will you read it to me 😍😍😍

Luke: wouldn't you rather I read you a nice story about a bear that loves honey or something??

Emma: no i wanna read that one!!!

Luke: why....

Emma: because it looks cool 😎

Luke: hoooboyyyy... Okay then...

Luke: so you see, you have to use the country's finances wisely. You can't just spend the money as you like.

Emma: oh!!! 😍😍😍😍 Why not?

Luke: well you see... I love honey. So I would spend all the money on building lots of shops that sell honey. What would happen then?

Emma: the city would be a mess of honey!! 😍😍😍

Luke: Yeah!!! Heaven for me, but what about the people who don't like honey? How would they feel?

Emma: oh I think they wouldn't like it 🥺

Luke: yup, that's why you have to think carefully about how to make everyone happy when spending money for the kingdom

Emma: wow you sure are smart, mister!! Like a Prince!!!! 😍😍😍😍

Mmmm i forget exactly what happens here but maybe he's like cuz I am a prince :p

Emma: OMG A REAL PRINCE?! LIKE THE KIND IN FAIRY TAILS!!!!

Luke: yup

Emma: I KNOW ALL ABOUT BEING A PRINCE 😍 THEY GO TO PARTIES!!!!!!!!!

Luke: oh yeah?

Emma: yeah yeah!!! And dance!!! And wear fancy clothes!!!!!!! 😍😍😍😍 I wanna go to a party and get dressed up!!!!!!!!

Luke: maybe when you're a bit bigger

Emma: like this big *stands on tippy toes*

Luke: more like this big *holds hand out to gf Emma's real height*

Emma: :((((((( I'll never be that tall

Luke: sure you will someday

Nokto: *pops in*

Luke: oh thank god it's only Nokto... He's not great with kids but at least he's no harm 😮‍💨

Nokto: yeah we gotta go buddy. Also what's with the brat?

Luke: dunno. She just showed up so I'm keeping her safe from the two troublemakers

Nokto: right then 🫤 welp, party isn't gonna wait for us. Let's go

Emma: A PARTYYY?!?!!! I WNANNA GOOOOO TOOOO 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💗💗💗

Luke: sorry bb, but you're missing the one thing you need in order to go to a party...

Emma: an invitation? 🥺🥺🥺🥺

Luke: yeah... An invitation 😢😢

Emma: 😥😥😥😥😥

Luke: hey emma, I gotta go to work now, but if you're a real good girl and stay right here, I'll do your hair up all pretty like you're going to a party, okay?

Emma: REALLY?! you promise, mister? 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Luke: promise, and maybe I'll even be able to get you an invite to the next party.

Emma: 😍😍😍😍😍 okay I'll be a good girl and stay right here and read this book!!! *Climbs back on bed and looks at book in fascination*

Luke: there is absolutely no way she understands a word of that.. but oh well 乁⁠(⁠ ⁠•⁠_⁠•⁠ ⁠)⁠ㄏ as long as she's entertained. Gotta ask the maids to keep an eye on her while I'm out tho...

Luke: *walking down the hall to the party* Leyla... :(

Nokto: you ok bud?

Luke: :/ meh

After Party.... Luke returns to his room to find EMMA IS MISSING!!!!!!!

*insert panicked Luke who finds emma in the kitchen with the two troublemakers*

Luke: *about to rawr at his brothers*

Emma: *sniffle sniffle* 😭😭😭

Clavis and Jin: Don't cry!!! We can make another batch!!! *Absolute panic* 😱😱😱😱😱😱

Luke: !!!!! 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬 *Picks up emma and huggles her* the fuck?!?! What did you do to her!!!????

Clavis and Jin: NOTHING 😰😰😰😰😰 WE SWEAR!!!!

Luke: THEN WHY IS SHE CRYING?!!!!! 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡

Emma: the cookies 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Luke: the cookies? What cookies bb? 😰😰

Emma: the cookies didn't turn out well!!!

Luke: we can get you more cookies bb. Anything you want!! Please don't cry 🥺🥺

Emma: noooo not the same!

Luke: 😰😰😰😰😡😡😡😡

Emma: because I wanted to make the cookies for you 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Luke: 😳😳😳😳🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

Clavis and Jin: told you we didn't do anything wrong 😮‍💨😮‍💨 we were just trying to help the kid out 🙄🙄🙄

Later when Emma falls asleep after the maids give her a nice bath 🫧

Luke: Hey Jin, is it wrong to forget or is it a good thing?

Jin: I think it means you're growing up. You're moving forward, so naturally things in the past get farther away. It's not a bad thing, just a fact of life.

Luke: I guess you're right... I feel bad that I thought of Emma first when I saw her and not Leyla... I guess that means I'm not trapped in the past anymore, but still...

I think it basically ends here and picks up in the epilogue, which I will translate tomorrow

🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

#ikemen prince #ikepri #luke randolph #ikemen luke #ikemen prince luke #ikemen prince luke randolph #ikepri luke

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impishtubist · 2 months

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the hedric anon here again :) to your previous post, YEAH, we're balling. new canon has arisen!!! you are so right about harry not becoming an auror!! all he wants is a loving family; he's already lost enough chasing dark wizards, and he would not sacrifice any time he could be spending with them... he also has The Money, you know. a shit load of it... and i can imagine him just casually buying the newest broom on the market on a whim even if cedric's team's regulations forbid using a personal broom (unfair advantage all that) because harry would so obviously overcompensate for the negligence he had to survive through as a child and spoil his beloved rotten.

and YES, cedric being a bit oblivious, but still a voice of reason would do the whole golden trio much good during their 5th year (funny thing, for the longest time i thought cedric was a 7th year in GoF, so i was kinda shooketh with all the fics where he returns to hogwarts the next year). imagine him getting to know sirius (harry has talked so much about him that sirius already loves the boy) and maybe introducing a few diggory family traditions to sirius and harry, because they had no time yet to form their own. and his dad's face when he's introduced to harry's godparents??? an ex-convict and a werewolf, who somehow work wonders as parental figures. mwah.

Not me learning through this ask that Cedric was only a sixth-year when he put his name in the goblet 😂 Now I am also shook. But omg yes that would make so much sense for my OOTP AU! Harry is in fifth year and Cedric is in seventh and he's like "wtf Harry just use the damn mirror that Sirius gave you! I love you so much but you are so dumb."

And YEAH Harry going to the cave to visit Sirius, but instead of talking about important things like Karkaroff and Voldy and the tournament, he just can't stop talking about this cute sixth-year, and Sirius catches a glimpse of Cedric during one of the tasks and is like "ah, I see it now." He figures Harry could do worse than date a sweet Hufflepuff who is also a Triwizard champion.

(Also lmao the mental image of Harry taking Cedric to meet the parents, but he takes him to a cave with an escaped convict and a hippogriff.)

And yes, once Sirius gets his freedom, there are lots of formal dinners and meeting the Diggorys. And yes!!!! Harry using his money to spoil Cedric!!! Cedric has plenty of his own, but it brings Harry so much joy that he can't say no.

(I also can't help but give everyone babies, so I will say that the Potter-Diggory babies are spoiled rotten by both their dads AND the grandparents. Sirius is especially bad about it, and Cedric has to build a second shed out back for all the toys Sirius keeps buying the kids lmao.)

#imp speaks #hedric #I DECLARE TODAY A NATIONAL HOLIDAY #IT IS HEDRIC DAY

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fangirling-throughlife · 9 months

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The ableism that some type 1s suffer is astonishing. Here are some things I had to endure in the last months:

- I tweeted a picture of my carry-on for a 2-week trip (which cost 25€ per flight) filled only with my diabetes essentials, and tagged the so-called "low-cost" airlines, saying that for some of us, "traveling light" is impossible (I said, and I quote "am I supposed to leave my pancreas home?"), and that we have to spend more money because we have an illness. They replied that they had different luggage options for different needs (which, WTF? that's not even an answer).

- A friend of mine from the States replied to my complaints that I couldn't find a PhD position in any of my desired countries (all of them with universal healthcare) by saying "well, they'd kill for someone like you in the US!". Yes, and I'd die because only my CGM is 60€ for 2 weeks, I use more than 80€ in insulin a month, and these are European prices. I know from various sources that you either hit the jackpot of health insurances, or you can't manage your diabetes properly in the US. And I doubt universities offer those. So, hard pass.

- During a trip to my brother's girlfriend's town, my CGM didn't work on the first day, and then my insulin pump stopped working on the second day and I went into ketoacidosis (bad enough that I couldn't eat, and I drank a lot, but not bad enough that I went into shock or anything). When I said I needed to return to the house urgently, the stupid-ass kid acted as if I was doing it on purpose to ruin her day. Then her dad would try and make me eat stuff, and when I said I couldn't eat because I'd just had a ketonic incident and I didn't feel well, they went "oh, diabetes sounds just awful, I couldn't live like that". Like, yeah, that's REALLY helpful

- That one idiot from airport security who mimicked a heroin injection when I said I had insulin pens in my carry-on bag

- The times I've had to endure comments about my "phone dependency", even though I've explained that it's the device I use to monitor my glucose levels

- Some people who've commented my eating habits (first proteins, then carbs), which were recommended by a nurse when I was 2 because fast-working insulin wasn't a thing yet and that way they could administer insulin and let me start eating before the carbs started doing their thing, and it's really fucking hard breaking a habit you've had for 23 years, even more if your doctor says it's a logical way of handling things, saying "oh, cute, my toddler nephew/daughter/grand-daughter also eats like that!"

- And, to me, the one that stings a little, but all the time, the incessant comments "I couldn't do that" or "you're so brave for enduring that" or "see, how's that making your life easier?" (when one of the devices malfunctions for a moment or something). Like, I get that some of these might sound encouraging, or that you think you sound supportive, but I spend most of the time trying to figure out what the fuck is causing a high or a low, or counting carbs, or calculating the times before I go jogging so I can work out but not have a hypo in the middle of it. I've had to quit swimming, a sport I genuinely love, every time I've restarted because no matter how many professionals have tried, there is no way of avoiding the hypo that inevitably comes a few hours after that. Those comments saying I'm brave and shit are not encouraging, because I have no other choice than to do this, and I would literally do anything to be able to stop doing this. This illness is exhausting, physically and mentally. There's no second of the day when you can take a break from it, so people saying that they couldn't do that or that I'm brave just sound like condescending pricks, if you ask me.

And that's it. My little rant. I hate diabetes.

#type 1 diabetes #t1d #I'm very tired and I've been sick and my BG has been uncontrollable #can you tell?

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thestobingirlie · 11 months

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speaking of steve never being allowed to be angry or get an adequate apology,,,, that fic that's been going around about eddie getting famous off a break up song about steve and steve getting relentlessly harassed by his fans bc of it is pissing me off. like the second part was posted (and ik the original prompt that inspired the fic included this but still) but steve's response is just singing this song about how he would put himself through it again to be w eddie and it's just. ugh. like steve saying all that before he even gets an actual apology after being outed and kicked out and nearly dying then spending the next 10 yrs being harassed and doxxed and stalked and physically attacked bc eddie wrote a cruel song that he continues to profit off of and actively perform and never stopped to think about how steve could be affected by a song that has his fucking name in the title is just so gross. like sure eddie feels bad and didn't know but come the fuck on. he hasn't even expressed that to steve! or anyone aside from his pr manager! how am i supposed to root for this. it's just baffling to me. esp bc we don't see their prior relationship and in the breakup steve was just employing basic logic (like waiting so that he could fully own his car and have some money to fall back on) that eddie attacked him over like a 5 y/o. i just do not understand this kind of grand gesture only works if it comes from the person that fucked up. not the person who got fucked over and spent a decade suffering while the asshole became rich and famous.

oh my god, get him outta there!!!!!

wtf, steve’s out here saying he’d do it all again and he hasn’t even gotten an apology???? god i’m glad i haven’t seen that fic lmao

i can’t even… the fact that robin hasn’t murdered eddie yet is inane.

i just honestly don’t understand how you can have one half of a couple do such terrible things, even if it was inadvertently, and still want the couple to get together??

#st fic critiques #asks #anon

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soldier-poet-king · 1 year

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I love my Nonna dearly but I also just got my first real "here's how you should find a man" advice so truly 2023 IS my Charlotte Lucas year

To be fair, I'll give them credit, this is one of the first times my family has pulled this shit on me. I suppose my "I'm too busy focusing on school" excuse that I used through all 8 years of undergrad and grad school doesn't really work now that I've been working full-time for a year. And she also didn't bring it up in front of everyone or out of the blue, it came up because we had been discussing how insane my motherhas been about babies lately and my Nonna said "oh it's BC she's waiting for grandkids"

And like??? Just because my mother got married and had kids by my age (which may have been the right decision for her, this isn't judging even if I think her life went to shit bc of it) doesn't mean it's the right decision for ME

In fact, it is the ABSOLUTE WRONG decision for me. Theres a whole long list of reasons why I'm not getting married + or having children, including but not limited to: the trauma of my parents marriage and my childhood, my own ongoing health stuff, the whole religious queer anxiety guilt complex I've got going, the fact that if I were to get pregnant the resulting mental health crisis and dysphoria would undoubtedly make me *** y'know not soemthing that is frequently a source of nightmares for me or anything, my inability to take care of myself let alone CHILDREN, and the anxiety of raising children religious when I don't even know wtf is going on with me, CHILDREN??? IN THIS ECONOMY????

Ofc I can't exactly say any of this to my Nonna who, while incredibly sweet and loving and Good, is also like. Not at all exposed to these concepts and would probably freak out if I was like hello yes I am a big fat queer and I rlly hate the concept of gender and societal ideas of womanhood :) it also doesn't help that rlly the only single, middle aged woman my Nonna knows is this lady who works at the church who is DEFINITELY a badly closeted lesbian but also she's super fuckin mean and condescending and no one likes her BC she's a bitch, on top of the whole being a badly closeted lesbian in a conservative heteronormative religious environment

Like even IF I were to get licitly Catholic married to a man. You wanna find one for me??? My Nonna was like "go to church more to find a man" HELLO??? WHERE??I GO TO MASS EVERY WEEK?? Every religious man I know irl is a radtrad women can't wear pants type or is a manchild. Even if I COULD find a normal man, he'd have to get real cool about some stuff real quick. In that forever dilemma of too leftist queer for the religious and too religious for the leftist queers. (Obvs your partner doesn't have to be your duplicate but I'm like. Generally being on the same page. The same BALLPARK. is probably conducive to having a healthy relationship, y'know?)

Besides a significant part of my having 0 social life is because I am living in my parents basement which is in a shitty not-a-suburb of mostly immigrant families with youngish kids or super old folks from when the neighborhood was built, so it's poor and run down but also super fuckin far from anything To Do, so it's the WORST of both worlds of urban sprawl. And I have no car. And I already spend 2.5 hrs a day commuting for work. And I'm chronically tired. And joining a fencing club or taking art class or whatever costs MONEY y'know the thing I'm trying to SAVE by living in this hell place???? She literally said in the same convo "live here as long as possible to save money" like??? YOU CANT HAVE UR CAKE AND EAT IT TOO as long as I'm living here I'm NOT going out and meeting ppl BC there is literally Nowhere To Go. Big box stores like Walmart? Yet another strip mall? The highway??? THIS IS SOULLESS HELL of neither nature NOR accessible city amenities

And anyway, I would rather be in a long term marriage for tax benefits relationship anyway. Not platonic, not romantic, but a secret third thing (jk but also serious). Like. Mutual devotion that blurs the lines and transcends labels. It could be completely chaste. It could not be. It's not a dealbreaker really. It's about trust and devotion and companionship and love. But also I'm insane and I KNOW how insane and obsessive I sound, and society prioritizes nuclear family relationships and not the weird ass shit I crave, and I feel too much too fast and would ruin any relationship I had even if I WERE to somehow find someone who prioritizes those things too

So like. It's fine. Most days (not all ofc, but I'm trying) I'm okay with this and being on my own and learning to cultivate my own peace and Goodness and I know who I am and what I believe and what I trust to be Good and I'm working toward that and I'm not sacrificing it for anything. But also. Can you give a bitch a break. Please. I'm so fkin tired

#franposting #my bday isnt even til JUNE #im going to bitch anyway #im genuinely really upset but part of that is bc my headache has come back #and its worse than ever #i might cry but my head already hurts too much #i got really good news at work and only the men in my family made a big deal #the women were just. meh. and ofc none of them have careers so why should ot be important to me?#as the only granddaughter ofc :))))#i am going. to crawl into bed. hair washed. lavender candle on.#do a lil meal planning. and then read or maybe just sleep.#tmrws goals after church are gym and grocery shopping before dnd #have to make my body hurt so much i cant think again #ofc bro 1 has claimed the car. so maybe i cant go #god. gos. i fuckin need to get out of here #but i literally cannot afford even studio apt rent in the city #and moving to one of the boroughs doesnt gwt me any closer to anything esp without a car #literally. just like. fuckin kill me #or find me a decently paid not soul killing job in a smaller city or even a town #where i could have a garden #or a porch swing. sit in. the sunlight

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