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thisaintascenereviews · 2 years

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Avoid - Cult Mentality Back in 2019, before the world changed drastically, the year was deemed “Twenty Nine-Scene,” due to the fact that “emo” and “scene” from the early to mid-00s was coming back in style. As someone that was in the thick of it during that time, especially from 2005 - 2010, during its height, I was ecstatic. I’ve slowly been getting back into a lot of that kind of music, at least the music I used to love at the time, and while some of it has not aged well at all, a lot of it I can enjoy on a purely technical level, now that I’m older, or that its nostalgia still holds up for me. Bands like Chiodos, The Devil Wears Prada, Underoath, Fall Out Boy (pre-hiatus, even though I do still listen to them and have listened to since my “scene days”), and many more bands are ones I listened to and soundtracked my adolescence. Maybe it’s wanting to return to that time in my life, or maybe it’s just nostalgia, but I’m really loving this newfound appreciation for it all. A lot of bands that are influenced by the early to mid-00s are popping up, too, especially metalcore and post-hardcore bands. Bands like Dying Wish, SeeYouSpaceCowboy, Foreign Hands, and The Callous Daoboys take influence from the early to mid-00s metalcore and mathcore scenes, but they make it their own. One band that’s been making waves the last few years, along with them, that hasn’t been getting the same amount of press, although I hope that changes is the band Avoid. This band has another album under their belt from 2018, but it seems like people are only discovering them now, whether it was through their last EP, which is how I found them, or their new album, entitled Cult Mentality. These guys are really interesting and unique, because they take a lot of different styles and elements from that time and make it their own. They take elements of pop-punk, post-hardcore, and metalcore and throw it all at the wall to see what sticks and what sticks is a nice blend of everything I listened to during that time. You traces of bands like Chiodos, The Devil Wears Prada, Underoath, A Day To Remember, and many more, and sometimes you hear multiple influences in the same song. For the most part, lean into the post-hardcore and pop-punk aspects of their sound, but a few moments get criminally heavy, such as at the end of “Gatorfest,” or during the middle of “B0red,” but for the most part, the album is still quite accessible for people that don’t want a full blown metalcore album. If you listened to a lot of post-hardcore and metalcore back in the day, you’ll enjoy it. They have that nostalgic sound that a lot of people can latch onto, and they do it in a way that’s catchy, fun, and interesting. Everything is executed extremely well, including the vocals and instrumentation, and the album is really short, only 32 minutes, so it goes by like a breeze. I will say, however, that its blatant nostalgia is also its biggest problem. This band relies way too much on people being able to hear a sound or idea and exclaim, “Wow, that sounds like [insert band here]! I really like them!” They do execute their sound well, and this is one of the most fun albums I’ve heard all year, but if you really break it down, it’s not very unique. It’s well-done, but it’s not unique. This just sounds like it could have come out in 2009, and it would have been a big hit. That’s the problem, though, they don’t do anything with it. The hooks are fantastic, and their sound is ripped right out of the rea, but I could also just listen to the bands that they’re clearly taking influence from. That’s the tricky thing with a lot of bands in this vein, and a couple of bands I mentioned earlier are guilty of that, but a couple of others also stick out enough and do something with that sound to make themselves worthwhile, and not just a cover band, so to speak. If you’re wondering whether or not I like it, or if it’s worth hearing, it’s a yes on both fronts. I really like this, but it would be hard to say I’d really love if it wasn’t for its nostalgia factor. I might think it’s more unique, but because I’ve heard these sounds done before, I’m enjoying it, but there’s something lacking here. I’d totally check it out if you want some great nostalgic post-hardcore that will immediately have you reaching for your studded belts and skinny jeans, but if you want something more unique, or if they put their own spin on these styles, you might want to look elsewhere.

#avoid #cult mentality #post-hardcore #metalcore #pop-punk #a day to remember #underoath #the devil wears prada #chiodos

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x-chubby-reader · 3 years

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Oh MY GOD what about Bakugou, kirishima, and sero who get hit by a quirk who turns them into a lil toddler or whatever and they’ve got the biggest crush on their chubby/plus size classmate 🥺🥺

A/N - I literally love this idea so much, thanks to @fandom-fander for helping out with this headcannon.

Not Prof Read

Lowercase Intentional

Cursing

Toddler!Bakugo, Kirishima, and Sero x Plus size reader

Bakugo

aizawa sure as hell didn't feel like dealing with the angry pomeranian in minature form

he decided to leave the boy with the class and let them decide among themselves on who should watch the little firecracker for the day

extra credit anyone?

everyone immediately pinned the responsibility on you

kirishima, he didn't feel like getting screeched at by a small bakugo and needed to apparently go study

he also knew that bakugo had a fondness for you in his teenage form, so why not see if he still has it

fr little bakugo pretends to hate your guts

somehow this little toddler has the most hurtful insults

“you can't even get a boyfriend? that's pretty sad.”

suddenly choking out a child is okay

do it… no one has to know how it happened

even though he had pretended to hate you, he still kept trying to show off to you

you decided to take him out on a little bike/tricycle ride? homeboy flipped it trying to show off how fast he could go and then proceeded to complain about scraping his knee

hey at least he got your attention

he is a literal leash kid fight me oh my god

bakugo will simply run away

you expected him to listen? oh you're in for a surprise

the only option that you give him is to either wear the embarrassing monkey pack or to hold your hand

he immediately grabs your hand and is literally so giddy and its adorable my lord-

smiles for days my heart i can’t-

he may seem all happy and nice, but that can flip in a minute

he’s the biggest brat sometimes and you are literally this close to punting him across the room

you don't get him something that he wants? little pomeranian boy will turn into a velociraptor child in an instant

the decimals that that kids voice can reach up to is kind of impressive not going to lie

“no bakugo, you can't have that right now maybe later-”

screech

thankfully he tires himself out quick enough to set him down for a nap

but nothing is ever simple, is it?

he wont go to sleep without you though, claiming that there are monsters and he needs to know where you are so he can protect you

no matter how many times you had explained to him that there weren't any monsters around, you slowly succumbed to his pleas

almost feeling bad for him, he just looked so serious about how you could get hurt that it made you feel bad

you didn't notice how much taking care of a kid took out of you until now

you had made a mental note to apologize to your mom for having to deal with you when you were younger later

As soon as you settled down on the couch with the toddler laying on top of you, you almost instantaneously passed out

oh boy were you in for a surprise when you woke up to a teen bakugo, still curled into your torso

he looked up to you after feeling you stir, he almost had a smirk on his face before burying his head back into you

mostly to hide the redness spreading over his face, he wasn’t going to admit that he was blushing

no way in hell

he just mumbled a “later” before his breaths softened into a steady pace

yeah, you may be stuck here for a bit

Kirishima

you were there for the whole thing

red-top had pushed you out of the way of an incoming quirk blast and suffered the consequences

he became young again, almost too young

you felt bad

and who wouldn’t

so of course you took it upon yourself to watch him until the effects wore off

the thing you learned about him was that he was an even touchy-er child

homeboy just wanted to be held all the time

just climbing up and latching himself onto your calf

it was adorable but hard to walk with

If you pick him up, you’ve basically sworn an oath with the devil himself

you cannot put him down

ever

he gives the most pitiful looks when you do and drags his feet when you walk

he also wont leave you alone

so curious in whatever your doing at that exact moment

and he is impressed by everything you do

“what are you doing?”

“reading”

“wow so cool!”

a bug came in through the window and he screamed

you walked in all nonchalant, grabbed your shoe, and smacked that some of a bitch into a next dimension

he lit up omfg

“wow y/n, that was so manly!”

you brought him in to class since it had been a school day and were too afraid to tell aizawa about the incident

the girls were literally all over him

i mean, who wouldn’t be all over an adorable and friendly (looking at you bakugo) kid?

and the pebble boy was lapping up the attention like a thirsty dog on a hot day

you never expected him to act like this

shy maybe, but then again he was pretty outgoing in his teenage form

he was grinning from ear to ear

literally posing like a mini body builder and making little huffing noises

even you couldn’t help it, letting a little aww out like most of the other girls

this had been causing a slight disturbance to the class

so the whole going to school thing was pointless as aizawa sent the two of you home anyways

he is already a tired dad, he dosen’t need to be dealing with a toddler right now

putting the little strongman on your back you began to walk

you had been hoping that the effects would wear off in a few more hours

but nothing ever goes to plan dose it?

while you had been walking, you noticed a significant weight increase, but just decided to ignore it

hey you were more sturdy and thicc, you wern’t no pussy, why stop all of a sudden because of the extra weight?

the only single thing that had alerted you to kiri being fully back was the whisper in your ear

instead of a sqeaky and mousy voice, you heart a more smooth and even comment

“hey stranger”

girl you dropped him and ran, him having to catch up to you

he has the audacity to give you a heart attack, he better suck it up

Sero

this was the same situation as bakugo, aizawa just didn’t want to deal with the kid

and especially a kid who kept mixing up two languages

he really was just so one

aizawa gave him the option to go to anyone

of course he ran straight to you, clinging onto your calf, as that was as high as he could reach

hey you looked the most inviting and least scary

he was literally terrified of bakugo and almost started to bawl is eyes out when he went near him

though he calm down slightly when he went down to get to a similar height as him.

why wouldn’t you take the opportunity to watch a cute little kid and skip class

hey, aizawa said whoever watched him got extra credit

but there soon was a slight problem that you noticed

well not really a problem, but more of a hurdle

with sero being raised in a household that spoke both english and spanish, he started to mix the two, not knowing any better

he would be asking for “leche” and you would just stand there trying to understand with your limited vocab

just the loading circle above your head whenever he started to talk

but you managed with google translate and going off of the vast amount of spanish soap operas you watched at 3 am once a week

surprisingly, he was a very artistic kid

at least every ten minutes he would walk over to you and hand you a squiggly picture of a flower, you, or him and you holding hands

and he would just giggle before running away to make another

bro heart go melt

being pre occupied with some papers that the father teacher had sent home with you, sero couldn’t get your attention

he might of forgotten your name and got stuck in a predicament

then the most rational thing popped into his head

well his dad called his mom “mi amor” and you and his mom were both pretty ladies

it made total sense to him so he went with it

“hey...”

nothing

“hey...”

nothing again

“hey... mi amor~”

your head shot up immediately

since he noticed that the name had gotten your attention, he just started using it

when he had shifted to being a teen again, the two of you never mentioned the name again

until a few days later when he was back to normal in class

homeboy was trying to get your attention and the multiple taps on the shoulder weren't cutting it

he got an idea

“hey... mi amor~”

yep that got you immediately

and he still uses that nickname for you

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metalbvcky · 3 years

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2020 Fic Year in Review

I’m waiting for my Sims game to finish updating, so I thought I’d do this since I saw @kalee60‘s post about it :)

Total number of completed stories:

14 (15 if you include a short 1am-oneshot I orphaned haha)

Total number of words:

111,575 (and that’s not including stuff I scrapped/haven’t posted omg)

Fandoms written in:

Marvel/Stucky but also Supernatural (on my main) just a tad because haven’t posted anything yet but I’m including it anyway haha

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected?

Oh, absolutely! Heck, I never thought I’d write anything when it comes to fic because I’ve always kept quiet about my writing. (And I’ve been doing it since I was like 12 and it all started with my Club Penguin phase pffft) But my interest turned into an obsession rather quickly and I honestly can say, without a doubt, that @buckybees is the whole reason why I even got the courage to post my first fic! I’m so glad I did because writing fic has given me a new perspective on fandom in general. And it makes me appreciate fandom/fanon even more.

What’s your own favourite story of the year?

Pretty much all of them but Bucky's Got a Bun in the Oven? holds a special place in my heart. Not only was it my first published fic, but I never thought I’d write something like that. I go back and re-read it frequently since it’s so short.

No lie: Sometimes I look back at that fic and it makes me wanna write a series of short oneshots with Pregnant!Bucky. Like, just Domestic Steve/Bucky living in the modern day with a baby on the way. Bucky shopping for baby clothes, decorating the nursery, having snack parties with Natasha, taking care of the baby after the birth, those sort of things. Oh, I think I just talked myself into another idea. 😂

Did you take any writing risks this year?

Ehh, not really? However, I did write a series of crack oneshots lol. Some are crazier than others.

Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the new year?

Apple Pie Crumble Cake - This is my #1 goal. It’s a Bakery!AU Kid Fic that I’ve been planning for months. It’s gonna be multi-chaptered, and at least 50k. I have 10 chapters outlined and there are still more I need to get to, but probably won’t until I start writing the darn thing lol.

I wanna start posting some smut oneshots on my secondary pseud, I have some done but I don’t think those will ever see the light of day since they’re just for practice- most of them were thought of on the spot without any outlining. I’d like to keep anything (totally) nsfw separate from my default pseud, just to be organized lol. And yes, this asexual read/writes smut. 😏 (my personal rule is as long as it doesn’t involve me, I’m good!)

I thought long and hard on this in the past week or so, and originally I thought I’d join the Shrunkyclunks ‘21 Bang but the more I thought about it, the less I wanted to do it. It’d be my first bang, and while I have an idea, it’s just a little intimating to me lol. Soo, I’ll pass this year. Instead, I’m gonna look out for a Bingo whenever a new one starts up, since I’ll prob be more comfortable with that :)

(Does this short lil Beach!AU count even though it’ll be done in 2020 but will be posted next year?? lolol)

On my main, I’m writing a Supernatural + Spongebob crossover fic. Sort of like the episode, Scoobynatural. And I have a feeling that it’s gonna be turned into a series because I’m latched onto this idea- that started as a joke.

Most popular story of the year.

Are we talking hits or kudos?? Hits, Buchanan Medical. Kudos, The Case of Bucky’s Wisdom Teeth. Eitherway, I’m so happy those two made it as my most popular stories. Buchanan Med is close to me on a personal level, and Bucky’s wisdom teeth fic is something I’ve always wanted to read but never existed :3

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion:

I think @kalee60 explained it perfectly when it comes to fics ‘flopping’ (I see this a lot on r/fanfiction) People will see it, they might like it, or won’t like it. And that’s okay! Not everything is for everyone, neither are tropes/genres. I know myself, I’m not a fan of A/B/O and the same could go for someone else who likes my personal favorite genre, hurt/comfort. And sometimes it’s kinda like an age old Tumblr saying: A post that took time and effort can get little as 10 notes but a spur of the moment post can get thousands. (Okay so, I made that up on the spot pffft)

Most fun story to write.

Buchanan Medical, but Mercury In Retrograde was super fun since I added the whole ‘space puns/pickup lines’ aspect to it. They basically share the same AU, but they’re totally different and that’s why I love them.

Most unintentionally telling story:

The entire Buchanan Med series. I wanted to explore Steve having asthma in a modern universe (because I too suffer from it- my whole life) and I really, truly, bled a little bit of my personal experience with the disease into the series. Having Bucky there, taking care of/treating Steve? It felt really comforting to me. And hey, write those self comfort fics!!!

Biggest disappointment.

I hoped to finish the last oneshot of Buchanan Med this year but sadly, my motivation for it just tanked. I write hurt/comfort best when I’m in the right mood for it, and I’m still waiting for it to come back to me, whenever that may be XD.

Biggest surprise.

The amount of reception I’ve gotten overall, the people I’ve met, the friends I’ve made, and new fandom experiences I’ve gotten to experience myself! Seriously, never in a million years did I think I’ve ever call myself a fanfic writer. But here I am, and I couldn’t be happier <3

~~~

My Sims game finished updating on the fifth question but I kept on rambling because I love taking about my writing!!! It made me realize that wow, I really did do a lot this year when it comes to fanon- especially since it was my first time delving into the world that is fanfiction writing <3 I have many hobbies, video games being the longest one, but I think I’ve spent more time writing/reading than playing games this year. My teenager-self WOULD NEVER believe that! But as the legendary Reggie Fils-Aimesays once said, "If it’s not fun, why bother?”

I’m gonna tag you guys if you wanna do this! @buckybees @justice-for-plums @hbalbat @its-tortle @captainjanegay @greyhavensking @snarky-drabbles @joharvele @musette22 @mysterious-marvel

#writing tag #mandy talks and stuff #tagging games #fanfiction #@ any/everyone who has read my writing: I LOVE YOU AND I'LL CHERISH YOU FOREVER

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hex6rcist · 4 years

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I would like to second your sentiment about the confession bit for Kenpachi's fluff alphabet needing it's own fic~ it's so cute 💞💞💞 Consider it requested in whatever capacity you'd like to write it! The thought of Ukitake and Shunsui helping him parse out his feelings is so delightful!

Wow this was super fun to write but it got pretty long so I threw in a read more. I hope you like it! I used fem pronouns because I noticed that's your preference. I hope that's okay.

Kenpachi Love Confession

She was feisty that one. It was exactly why she’d caught his eye. It was rare to find firecrackers like y/n in the 2nd division. Sui-Feng expected her inferiors to be the pinnacle of grace and restraint. That’s what brought her around to the 11th so frequently. For a short amount of time Kenpachi had considered trying to snake her away from the 2nd and bring her under his command. However he scrapped the idea. He wanted something more than a captain/subordinate dynamic. It would feel a bit creepy to him his he got her to join his division and then tried to pursue her. So he let himself be happy with her just hanging around for training sessions.

Watching y/n take down his men was a thrill to him. But it couldn’t compare to the feeling of when they went toe to toe. She fought like she was dancing, lithe and graceful, no doubt due to her training under Sui-Feng. It was in staggering opposition to his own brash fighting style. She’d cavort out of the way of his blade with a gleeful laugh that lit his skin on fire. She always threw him off his game just a little. Kenpachi was pretty sure she’d landed more hits on him than any of his men ever had. Every little graze she left on his body he’d admire later. Firm, large fingers would trace over the feint scar as he laid in bed. Sometimes he’d find his eyes drifting shut and in a brief moment he’d imagine it was y/n’s fingers insteaed. Kenpachi’s eyes snapped open and he stared up at the ceiling. He was hit pretty hard and he knew it. The feared Kenpachi Zaraki fawning over a beautiful girl. It was almost laughable. He had to do something about this.

He spent the rest of the night tossing and turning, trying to figure out how the hell he was going to pull this off. He’s not a big romantic gestures kind of guy. But would y/n even want that? Would she even want him? Sure he was muscular and tough but was he... Attractive? Kenpachi had never even considered the thought. His life in the Rukongai was harsh, leaving was no time for courting or romance. as embarrassing as it was he was kind of inexperienced in this matter. That’s when he finally got an idea. Though he’d really have to swallow his pride on this one. This was how he found himself sitting on Shunsui Kyoraku’s veranda next to Jushiro Ukitake.

The two men sipped on their tea while Kenpachi looked down at his with mild distaste. He still took small samples from his cup as to not be rude. He had learned some manners after all and he was here for help. Jushrio’s smile was genuine and soft, he was pleasantly surprised by Kenpachi’s request for advice. Shunsui however had a big shit eating grin. “So y/n huh?” He chuckled softly. “She is something.” Jushiro odded in agreement, “A lovely young lady.” “Very lovely.” Shunsui swooned playfully. Kenpachi was beginning to worry he might of made a mistake, but before he can back out Jushiro fixed him with a serious look. “We’re more than happy to help you out in this matter and we’re glad you came to us for advice.” “You know I think This is a conversation that calls for sake.” Shunsui stood up and moved to retrieve a bottle. Finally one of them was speaking his language. Kepachi set his tea aside. “So Kenpachi, did you have any ideas on how to approach y/n with your feelings?” The large man pinched the bridge of his nose. _‘Don’t be rude. They’re trying to help.’ _“Can’t say I do. I’m not even sure how she’d react. I’m not the most,” he cleared his throat “eligible guy around.” Shunsui returned with 2 cups of sake and some more tea for Jushiro. “Nonsense, don’t be hard on yourself. Y/n Isn’t the average lady who’d be intimidated by you. She’s tough and already comfortable around you. I don’t think you have to worry about intimidating her.” He handed a cup to Kenpachi and he gladly accepted it, drinking deeply. “I guess that’s true...” Jushiro held up a finger, signaling that he’d thought of an idea. “The Sakura Festival is coming up next week, perhaps you can invite y/n to come with you. It’s a relaxed event so you won’t feel uncomfortable and y/n won’t think anything of you asking her to go because everyone attends.” Shunsui hummed mulling over his friend’s suggestion. “That might be a little too, uh, what’s the word...” “Flowery.” Kenpachi interjected. The 1st Division captain nodded in agreement. “Yeah, flowery.” A small silence fell amongst the men as they pondered other options. “Well what do you and y/n usually do in the time you spent together?” Shunsui inquired. “Fight. Drink. Talk.” The men nodded. “Talk about what exactly?” Jushiro chimed in. “Stuff...” The elder captains sighed in unison. He wasn’t making this easy was he? Kenpachi took another long drink to gather up the nerve to elaborate. He really wasn’t too good with this whole sharing his feelings thing. But if he wanted to pursue a relationship he had to get used to it. “We swap stories... Some about her time in academy or my time in Rukongai**.” **They were finally getting somewhere. “Well then maybe that’s what you should do then.” The Sotaicho smiled at Kenpachi. “It might not be the most romantic thing in the world but it would be the most genuine.” He held up his cup of sake. “A nice drink and when you’re sharing stories just tell her how you feel.” Jushiro nodded in agreement a smile blooming on his face as well. It sounded simple enough. Kenpachi downed the rest of his drink in a single gulp. “Just tell her huh? Yeah. I can do that.”

The next day when Kenpachi woke up late into the afternoon and his head was pounding. He’d stayed at Shusui’s well into the night going drink for drink with him. He ran a large hand down his face before dressing and emerging from his quarters. He could already hear a ruckus going on in the direction of the training grounds. Walking out onto the engawa he saw y/n was already here. She was covers in a thin sheen of sweat, her shihakusho clung to her body and her jewel like eyes shoe with glee as her opponent fell. She gestured for him to be removed from her sight before her predatory gaze latched onto the 11th Division’s groggy captain. With the crook of her finger he was summoned before her to fight. The hairs on his neck were already standing on end. He really was a slave to her beck and call and he had a suspicion that she maybe knew.

Dusk had come before either of them knew it. They often lost track of time while locked in combat. Too caught up in the thrill of it all. By now the cool wind had dried the sweat on their skin leaving them cold and uncomfortable. Most of the division gave up on getting their training in and went about business as usual. Y/n and Kenpachi’s Zanpakuto were locked together in a stalemate. Their eyes burned into each other. Finally he used the last of his strength to push and y/n fell. She laughed giddily and stared up at the darkened sky, trying to catch her breath. The captain entered her line of sight and offered a hand to pull her to her feet. She gladly accepted and bowed to the winner who in turn bowed back. “You know you’re better than most of my men right?” She let out a loud laugh. “I’ve noticed.”

The two had settled on the engawa side by side. Kenpachi had brought out a bottle of sake to share. Y/n was leaning back on her banged up elbows, one knee bent and the other hanging lazily off the edge of the platform. Even caked in dirt and blood she was beautiful. Scratch that it was when she was the most beautiful. He handed her off a choko full of alcohol and she drank from it greedily. His eyes lingered on her neck, watching as she swallowed. He licked his lips and tore his gaze away. The night was moving far faster then Kenpachi would have liked. His Division was slowly falling quiet and soon it felt like they were the only two still up in the whole Seireitei. At some point she’d gotten cold and inched closer to his side. He could feel her warmth through his clothing and he was sure she could feel his as well. They talked, and laughed, and drank like they would any other night. Only Kenpachi knew this one would be different.

“Y/n, I’ve been meaning to talk to you.” Clear eyes turned to look up at the captain but he couldn’t meet her gaze. “What have we been doing?.” He shook his head, eyes fixed in the sky above them. “About something specific.” It was time to rip the bandaid off. He knew the worst she could say was no, but it was going to sting more than the slice of her blade. “I’ve been thinking a lot about you.” He peeked over to see her cheeks had flushed a light pink. He figured that had to be a good sign. Right? They finally locked eyes. “And what do you think of me?” She leaned in involuntarily. Here goes nothing. “That I like you... A lot.” He wanted to punch himself. Kenpachi felt like a child with a schoolyard crush saying it like that. He really should have- His train of thought was derailed by a quiet chuckle. Y/n got up on her knees and leaned into him. “I like you too.” A little smirk crossed her lips. She was going to say more but her words were cut off. A large hand had found the back of her head and pulled y/n into a deep kiss that made her head spin. Her hands clutched onto the front of his haori and his hands slowly found their way down to her hips, pulling the smaller girl into his lap. His kiss was full of passion and longing that she’d never known before. It made her let out a tiny moan. The sound shot a bolt of lightning though his whole body. When they parted they were both gasping for air. She licked her lips and smirked softly. “A lot.”

#kenpachi zaraki #kenpachi #kenpachi x reader #bleach imagines #bleach scenarios

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im-the-punk-who · 4 years

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Hey, I was wondering if you have a book rec

Okay so in full disclosure, I have a really hard time reading books. My brain sometime around six years ago just decided that wasn't its style anymore, so I don't read a TON. A lot of these aren’t going to be recent releases. However, here are a bunch of books I would absolutely recommend checking out! I tried to include a variety of genres but I have uh.....five bookshelves in my apartment so if you're looking for more of a certain genre let me know!

Theatre:

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead - Tom Stoppard

Waiting for Godot - Samuel Beckett

These are my two favorite plays - they're both absurdist, humorous, and have some fun things to say. They’re both by old white guys but like....I love both Tom Stoppard and Samuel Beckett DEEPLY and they have all of my love and respect.

Non-Fiction/Educational:

Why are all the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria by Beverly Daniel Tatum - this is considered a 'classic' on the psychology of racism, and was particularly helpful for me as a white person in arming myself against 'reverse racism' thoughts and in dissembling my own prejudices. This is mostly a rec for other white folks, but Tatum also addresses 'having the courage to sit at the black table' as a way of claiming your own identity outside of the stereotypes the dominant society expects of you.

Daring Greatly by Brene Brown - Okay listen I just really REALLY love Brene Brown, she is a therapist most famous for her TED talk about Vulnerability and this is just...listen I really like to read this book when I am sad and feel like shit because it makes me feel strong. I reread this book at least once a year.

Imagined Communities by Benendict Anderson - This is an absolutely fascinating read on the rise of nationalism. It’s a bit dry and wordy, but the ideas and use of history as propaganda, spinning the story of a nation to pit it against or on the same side as other nations, and the ways in which these tactics shaped cultural history is just!!!! Amazing.

Gay New York by George Chauncey - This is just one of the most informative and interesting reads of queer history in New York that I’ve ever come across. It’s one of the ‘must reads’ of queer history and has so many interesting tidbits that I have to recommend it. It’s a bit old(published in 1994) but I still find it relevant and interesting to read.

Personal Fiction/Autobiographical Fiction

White Girls by Hilton Als - I went to a reading of this book when it first came out. It was so much fun and so eye-opening for me as a baby queer in NYC that I bought the book there. I wanna be really clear that Als does not pull punches and a lot of people don’t quite like it, but I love Als’ style of writing. The stories and essays in this book are amazing and funny and heartbreaking and informative of queer experience - particularly black queer experience - that I always feel like...honored? to experience through writing? This is one of those ‘you’re gonna suffer but you’re gonna be happy about it’ reads - it can be hard to face because of how very hard the pills are to swallow but like....gosh I just love this book and it’s interesting and hilarious and great.

Confessions of an Economic Hitman by John Perkins - this is my tin hat favorite. It hits....ugh. This is one of those books that came out and like every government agency freaked the fuck out over it. It’s an interesting look into the quote-unquote dark underbelly of capitalism; how and why countries manipulate each other through economic policies. Super interesting read with a nice style of prose.

The Know-It-All: One Man's Humble Quest to become the Smartest Person in the World by A.J. Jacobs Okay so full disclosure I have not finished reading this, but I’m far enough through to rec it. This book chronicles the author’s attempt to read the entire Encyclopedia Brittanica from front to back, and it is just as kooky and hilarious as it sounds. I am very incredibly and deeply offended this author stole both my schtick and my initials, thereby preventing me from doing this exact thing. I read through the phone book in its entirety when I was three. I had it in me. Anyway, this is basically the author just listing weird interesting facts he’s read about and connecting them to his daily life, but it’s a fun read, and you learn a lot of totally useless facts, which is absolutely my jam.

When Skatboards Will Be Free by Saïd Sayrafiezadeh - HI I LOVE THIS BOOK. I’ve read it maybe three times over. It’s so fun and interesting. You may notice that a lot of the books I rec are very absurdist in their humor, and this is no exception. This book is full of the dry wit and just weird goddamn shit you could only expect from the child of a revolution that never came. You want to read a book about someone who Went Through Shit? Read this book. It’s funny and heartbreaking and just. AHHHH. Seriously I cannot recommend this enough.

Hyperbole and a Half by Allie Brosch - FIGHT ME ON THIS. I love this book.....so much. Yes it’s technically a comic book but the stories are so INTERESTING and hilarious and full of exactly the dry absurdist humor I eat the fuck up. Also! Allie Brosch recently released a sequel of sorts called Solutions and Other Problems that I recommend without even reading it.

Poetry

Pansy by Andrea Gibson - IF YOU ARE NOT READING THE POETRY OF ANDREA GIBSON WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING WITH YOUR LIFE. I cried seven times reading this book. There are only like 14 poems. Please please read this to break your own queer heart :)

Bloodsport by Yves Olade - This is a tiny book full of absolutely devastating poetry. Most of it has to do with the grief of relationships, but like....gosh I love all of Olade’s stuff. (Also!! This is available as a pay-what-you-wish pdf!!)

Bright Dead Things by Ada Limón - This book focuses a lot on the author’s experiences of loss, and knowing that loss is going to happen. I’m completely devastated every time I read this.

Science Fiction/Fantasy

The Bartimeaus Sequence by Jonathan Stroud - So what if I am a dumb millennial I love this series. It’s another dry and deadpan humor, with weird additions and Stroud’s use of footnotes to absolutely crack me the fuck up means I gotta rec this. I just gotta. Four(I think?) books following the deeply unlikeable Nathaniel and his Djinn Bartimaeus, who just wants to eat humans and have a deeply enjoyable enemies to lovers plotline with his arch rival.

The Magic's Price Trilogy by Mercedes Lackey - Okay I know I’ve recced this before. I will rec it again. This was the very first series I ever read that featured a gay protagonist and I was. Devastated? Reformed? I latched onto Vanyel Ashkevron and I am never letting this depressed emo boy go. Try me, I bite. Seriously, this book was released in the 80s and yet it is still relevant, I still cry - god i LOVE this series SO MUCH. And, MERCEDES LACKEY actually invented unbury your gays, sorry I make the rule on that one. :) Also there are magic talking horses??????? Seriously please read this series I love it so much.

Fire Bringer & The Sight by David Clement-Davies - This is another series that was absolutely formative in my baby lexicon. These are books about magical animals and their inner societal workings and both books address the ideas of good, evil, darkness, compassion and good will, and destiny. I am obsessed with these books, they are some of the most interesting of the genre I’ve read, and so incredibly intricately written. LOVE these books.

Vampire Earth Series by E. E. Knight - The Witcher before it was cool. Sort of but like...there are schools of Cat, Bear, etc and it has COOL VAMPIRES I LOVE THSI SERIES. Basically, earth has been taken over by a race of alien ‘Vampires’ and follows a human involved in the resistance. The writing in this series is...wow. It’s so intricate and interesting and involved. I own the whole series because I love it so much, including the after-series hardback novels. I’m so messy and I love it.

Kindred by Octavia Butler - You know how people are like ‘YOU SHOULD READ OCTAVIA BUTLER!!’ ? You should absolutely do that. This novel is mindblowing and interesting and the pace and narrative are so so so interesting. Heartbreaking, god, horrific. Butler is an amazing writer and this novel, while my personal favorite, is not by any means the only of her books I would recommend. STORIES. STORIES!!!!!!!

Fiction

The Ballad of Barnabas Pierkiel: A Novel by Magdalena Zyzak - This book is so fucking good. It’s imaginative, funny, intelligent....it’s honestly one of the best fiction novels I’ve ever read. Again, dry, absurdist humor, this book sort of reminds me of Terry Pratchett’s style of writing.

The Call of the Wild by Jack London - This is a classic, a true classic. The social commentary of this book is so so good, London’s style flows and, personally, as a dog and animal expert, the anthropomorphisation of Buck and his fellow animals is just so well done. I love this book, it’s quite an easy read, and I reread it at least once a year.

Rolling the R's by R. Zamora Linmark - Okay. Okay okay!!!!!! I gotta take a deep breath about this one. This book is. Yuh. This is a bit younger leaning than the other fictions, focusing almost entirely on high school level characters, however the experiences and commentary is just so so good. Focusing on a diverse group of characters growing up in Hawaii in the 1970′s, this book addresses the intersectionalities of gender, sexuality, race, immigration, education, and how we define who we are. I’m obsessed.

A Separate Peace by John Knowles - A heartbreaking novel about war, innocence, adolescence, and how we hide from our truths. It’s...so good, this book hurts me a LOT okay. The prose is phenomenal, the story is poignant, and it feels like I’m ripping my own heart out with a fishhook every time I finish it.

The Toss of a Lemon by Padma Viswanathan - This is one of those books I half recommend because it’s so good, and half because of the deep wealth of knowledge it presents the reader. The author’s use of her own culture is just....goddddddddd. Intricate and interesting and so delicately included in the narrative that you can feel the love the author has for it. It’s a long read and it took me almost a month to get through reading every day, but god. It’s so soft and amazingly written I both wanted to read it all at once and take my time with it. This is another one that deals with the duality of humanity and how we connect with one another. Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!

P.S. Your Cat Is Dead by James Kirkwood Jr. - I love this book I love this book I LOVE THIS BOOK. It’s fucking hilarious, entertaining, I literally laughed out loud at every single chapter. Hilarious and poignant and surprisingly deep, this book literally follows the journey of a man in which literally everything that could go wrong does. It’s fucking hilarious.

I hope that helped and gave you some new books!!! <3

#long post #book recs #milo writes

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pepperful-qt · 4 years

Note

Hello there 🥰🥰 Can I request a fluffy headcanon please 🥺 With the smol bois (hinata, yaku, and Noya) having s/o that gorgeously tall, and always give everyone the deathliest Glare if anyone mocking their lover in any shape or form, and not afraid to Fight.. NO ONE ALLOW TO HURT THEIR BABIES..!!! ＼＼\\٩(๑`^´๑)۶//／／

MY FAVS yes ofc 😍

Hinata, Yaku, & Nishinoya with a tall s/o who's protective

***

Hinata

He's your biggest fan!! This sunshine incarnate is obsessed with height already he probably teaches you how to spike aw

if you felt at all insecure about your height before it's long gone

any jealousy he has is a) volleyball related, not ego, and b) overpowered by his love for you

will jUmp to give you kisses

which is a really bad idea because 95% of the time he misses and you guys clash noses or teeth ouch

but when it works it's the cutest thing ever

he is your hype man, the little ball of energy that can always make you smile

and it's his passion that made you really fall for him. he is like,, the biggest optimist you've ever met it's almost concerning but also inspiring <3

and the fact that anyone looks down on him bc of his height makes you boil with rage

bc how dare you underestimate or put him in a box for something as trivial as height ?!

obv you know he'll prove them wrong but it's still annoying

you know when Hinata was talking with his classmates about being on the team and they assumed he was a manager or ball boy?

"I'll have you know my boyfriend is one of the most important players on the team, and he is a starter but even his spikes won't compare to how hard I'll beat your ass if I hear you doubting him again--"

Hinata is desperately dragging you away or trying to defuse the situation bc your face looks like murder and you're looming over them

he's always a bit nervous around that side of you but also loves it and. Kinda like how he is around powerful players

lordy help anyone commenting on his height or technique in the stands of a match bc he can't hold you back there lmao

Yaku

wow you're that power couple

badass+badass i love yaku

this bitch definitely makes you lean down for smooches. like hell he'd stretch or go on his tippy toes nope. just taps his cheek or something and waits

his favorite thing is falling asleep on your shoulder though but he'll never admit it. It's just the perfect height for it :)

Back hugs are another big thing for you guys. It goes both ways really. Sometimes you'll drape your arms over his shoulders while you're talking or doing other stuff or he'll grab you from behind and press his cheek to your back

but it's not just you who defends him, oh no, he's your protector too

yall will legitimately argue about who loves the other more his team are actually concerned before they hear you then they just slowly back away

both of you are just talk shit get hit kinda people

why anyone would mess w either of you I would never understand

Except Lev. He would. And he does

rip

he never learns somehow. or he just finds it too hard to resist

throws that "yaku your s/o is so much taller than you wow" and-

talk shit get hit Lev

but then, oh but then

he's talking to you once after practice when you're waiting for Yaku to walk home together

"how does it feel being with Yaku-senpai?"

"what do you mean?"

"he's so" *puts hand near your waist* "and you're" *raises hand to your eye level*

and..sigh. oh Lev

you actually have a sweet demeanor when talking to people, but oOf does it drop immediately

like night and day and Lev is 👁️👄👁️

and you're really not that much shorter than Lev either so he doesn't even have height to make him feel secure

he knows he fucked up before you say a word

"what do you mean by that?"

"nothing! I was just-"

"no. explain it to me."

tbh nothing can save him now 😔

you met him like 5 minutes ago n you're already starting a fight smh

and after that let's just say everyone knows not to mess with you or your bamf smol bf 💕

Nishinoya

this guy

he's not jealous of the height difference at all really

instead he's annoyed and sad your pretty face is so far away :(

so he finds a way to reach it >:)

yeah this monster will def jump on you and climb you like a tree

sometimes it's to kiss you, sometimes he just does it bc why not

you'll be walking through the hallways at school and all of a sudden you hear a distant shout

"Y/NNNNNNN~~!!!"

and right as you turn around you're full on tackled by your bf as he does a running jump and latches onto you in a hug

yall def both have bruises from doing that kind of thing jfc

loves the way you scare everyone away with one look. that shit is so sexy to him

like a mixture of yes that's my bamf s/o quiver in fear and he himself the count me as scared AND horny

you guys honestly are the coolest couple though no lie

you're really ready for a fight 24/7 too

you love this guy so much it's scary he does too

so if anyone even looks at him or you weird you're immediately 💪

depending on the situation Nishi will either give you a pat to calm you down or cheer you on

loves to see you worked up lmao

but a cold look from you looming is enough to get anyone to run tbh

you're his angel 🙏

***

this was so fun ty for requesting~

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madame-fouquet · 3 years

Text

2020 Anime Retrospective

With the end of the year here, and all the anime that came with it now behind us, I feel like looking back and reminiscing on it. So, following the style of ANN's own yearly retrospectives, may I present my 2020 anime in review! Enjoy.

Best of the year: Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken

This is actually not the first time Yuasa and his crew of, let's be honest, visionaries have rolled something special out right at the beginning of the year in some weird power move against everything else that has to follow it. They did it back in 2018 with Devilman Crybaby, and then they hit us this year with Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken. You ever have one of those shows where you're just constantly in awe of everything it does? Where you never found yourself chasing merch or hunting after content based off it online, but you consistently find yourself thinking about it? Yeah, that's what Eizouken did to my brain after I watched it. It was such an earnest love letter to anime and anime production, to animation in general, that I couldn't help but get sucked into its imagination and enthusiasm. The way it was able to so perfectly illustrate that pure, boundless, childlike joy that one can derive from the simple act of creating, I'd be lying if I didn't say that it had a powerful effect on my own desire to continue creating. (Corny as that sounds, it's true.) The sheer amount of love it contains, and the equal amount it puts out into the world make it so I know I am going to be thinking about it again and again for a long long time.

Runner-up: Akudama Drive

I don't know if it's really quite a matter of my two favorites being opposites, but there are definitely some pretty sharp stylistic and tonal differences between my two top shows this year. Akudama Drive's cocaine-fueled bender of an intro episode made it very clear what it's intentions were and what it wanted us to be prepared for. That doesn't mean I had ANY idea of where it was headed narratively, but I did know I was in for one hell of a ride. And it delivered is spades on that promise. The twists and turns, no matter how insane, illogical, or steeped in tropes they were, were all such a colorful energetic spectacle that it would be hard to hold anything against the series. Every character was such a force that I didn't really consider any of them a weak point. Yeah, some of them were more or less cardboard cut-outs of antagonistic elements, but when the cardboard cutout looks REALLY FREAKING COOL, it's hard to get too torn up over the details. It's a show that oozes style and knew EXACTLY what it wanted to do and be, and I have to respect that.

Runner-up-up: Toilet-Bound Hanako-kun

The next few entries aren't really in any sort of order, I actually found it near impossible to sort anything below my top two. Hanako-kun however does hold a bit of a special place for me though because, at least from a stylistic standpoint, it hits so many of my buttons. Just visually this show is the exact kind of thing my younger self would have latched onto immediately, even before knowing anything about the actual content. I suppose not much has really changed though. I'm absolutely in love with the animation style of Hanako-kun, and I got really lucky that there is an interesting story and delightful cast of characters underneath that visual splendor. Along with the sharp lines, intense colors, and soft characters, I'm also a sucker for contemporary supernatural mysteries. That's a fancy way of saying one of my favorite shows as a kid was The X-files, but both make the point pretty well. The world of Hanako-kun has a lot to offer, and I can only hope it gets a second season so we can continue to delve into it's beautiful and terrifying mysteries.

Runner-up-up: Kaguya-sama: Love is War Season 2

I know a lot of people will be talking about this one when it comes to “Best of” lists. I know a lot of people were talking about the first season when it reminded us just how funny anime can be back in 2018. Absurd high school comedies (Is that a genre?) could definitely be considered my favorite. Hell, of my top five favorite anime of all time, THREE of them fall under that category. So believe me when I say Kaguya-sama absolutely deserves the deluge of praise it receives. For what describing something as “laugh out loud” is worth, this show had me constantly needing to pause it just so I could finish laughing at whatever ludicrously funny misfortune had just befallen it's cast of lovable morons. The thing is though, Kaguya-sama understands that you can't just earn love and goodwill on laughs alone, there needs to be a beating heart at the center of all the shenanigans. And when this season had me actually cheering on and feeling sorry for Ishigami of all people, I knew that beating heart was present and accounted for. Look, the cast are all self-centered idiots, but I'll be damned if they aren't also my dear children who I delight in watching slowly grow and become slightly less self-centered idiots.

Runner-up-up: Dorohedoro

When the Dorohedoro anime was first announced, a lot of my experience was watching a group of people online scream about how they were so pumped that it was finally getting an anime. I had never heard of it before, but the excitement was very real and tangible. And I gotta say, sometimes you need to believe the hype. I've never been one to shirk a series just because it was CG animation, (Watch ID-0 dammit!) but Dorohedoro makes a strong case for why people shouldn't sleep on something based solely on it's animation. The dirty, grease-encrusted world of Hole is brought to life with plenty of flair and style that, I feel, the CG didn't hold back at all. What I had seen said was that for a long time Dorohedoro was kinda considered “unanimateable” but I think MAPPA did the iconic manga a fair amount of justice. Even if pulpy ultra-violence isn't normally your thing, I still highly recommend giving Dorohedoro a look, it might just end up being a hole worth going down.

Honorable Mention: Show By Rock!! Mashumairesh!!

I know what you're thinking, but hear me out. The first Show By Rock!! was definitely an indulgence for me. While not something I considered a high level series by any stretch: messy plotting, shallow characters, a weird isekai angle, a lackluster finale, and an even MORE lackluster second season, it still got is hooks into me with its sheer energy and fluffy charm. So despite the, as mentioned, rough second season, I was more than happy to check out the new series in the franchise. And boy was I glad I did. Mashumairesh!! takes all the heart and sweetness that worked for the first series and dials it up. It then took a hard look at a lot of what DIDN'T work in the first series, and manages to fix most of the issues. Removing the isekai angle and the whole existential threat thing, and just letting the series be a “slice-of-life but in an electric animal filled music world” did wonders for the direction and consistency. Add to that more properly fleshed out characters, and you get a series that is far stronger than it's progenitor. The next series, Show By Rock!! Stars!!, will be adding back the cast from the first series, and that could very well be a sign that it will be falling back into its old habits, but the presence of the Mahumairesh!! girls gives me hope that it might have a chance of staying the new, far better course.

Worst of the Year: Digimon Adventure:

This one really hurts to say. What hurt more was how quickly I knew what show I'd be electing for this position. One thing to clarify is that I would not nominate a series that I'd only watched one or two episodes of, that's just not fair. So the award was bound to go to something I had at least dedicated a decent amount of my time too. And in any other year this may have gone to something that was more my “least favorite” or had an ending that disappointed me. But unfortunately I have to be honest and sit here and tell you that the newest entry in the Digimon franchise was easily the worst thing I watched this year. I have been a long time Digimon fan. Ever since I was but a wee lass watching the original Digimon Adventure premiere on Fox Kids at a family reunion, I have always considered the franchise a sort of cornerstone of my anime fandom. So please understand the excitement I had felt when I found out they were doing a full on remake of that flagship series. Imagine how absolutely pumped I was when the bombastic movie-like premiere of Digimon Adventure: wowed us with everything it delivered, and all the promises of what was to come. And then imagine my disappointment, my despair as the show devolved until it showed us what it really was during the finale of the Fake Tokyo arc. I would call it a production meltdown, but considering the precedent that got set back in episode 10 during the already shaky Ultimate Evolution arc, has been so clearly informing everything up to the current episodes in the early 30s, I have to be honest with myself and admit: this is what we were going to get all along from day one. All of the heart that had made the original series so endearing, despite its own flaws, just isn't present here. What you get here is just a non-stop (and I mean non-stop) string of barely related fights with poorly-defined stakes, or sometimes no real stakes at all. It's just one ugly set piece fight after another as the children chase after vaguely implied evils. I think the most damning thing is how much more I could say about just how much this series has let me down. Like I said, this one hurts.

Best Theme-Song of the Year: Night Running (BNA)

My opinion of BNA as a series is complex. But my opinion of its ED, Night Running, is simple: Its a god-damned bop! I could spend this whole section talking about the artistry of the ED animation itself, its fun and creative use of color, the slight variations for certain episodes, the focus on character, or the fact that it was done by an American animation team. I could even talk about the song's importance to the series as a whole and its place in the narrative. I won't though. The fact of the matter is that even without all that, I STILL probably would've picked Night Running as my best of the year because as a song it is just that much my jam. This is the kind of shit I could listen to on repeat for hours, days, weeks, and still keep coming back to it. Don't get me wrong, Ready To is a damn powerful and catchy tune that goes hard, but at the end of the day, I'm a sucker for a soulful pop tune like Night Running. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWTFfEnMCCc

Best Character: Sayaka Kanamori

This was actually probably the hardest category for me to decide on. It was stuck hard between Eizoken's Kanamori and Akudama Drive's Doctor. I know those are a powerfully different pair in basically every way, but it was specifically for their startling differences that both characters stuck out to me so much. In the end though, it was the poignant rounding out of, and emotional hooks of Kanamori's character that let her triumph over her delightfully two-dimensional opposition. Kanamori already had me from episode one. In a show that I wasn't really worried about the usual diversions of anime ingestion like picking a favorite character, Kanamori sealed herself as “Best-girl” from the word go. I have mad respect for a girl who knows what she wants, and has a clear idea of how she's going to go about getting it (See also: Doctor.) But Kanamori was more than a driving desire for success and money. Underneath her unstoppable ambition there was a very real, very relatable driving impetus. She stood apart, and yet still believably vulnerable and invested in the people she associated with. It was always a blast watching her suffer as the only thing keeping the more creative minds on track, and yet she was never reduced to a simple task master; her love and respect for her friends was always clearly visible. I could go on and on about how Kanamori is a nearly perfect character, but I hope I've said enough already without having to resort to senseless rambling.

Best Moment: Howan confesses her feeling to Himeko (Show By Rock!! Mashumairesh!!)

By the time episode six rolled around, Mashumairesh!! had already shown marked improvements over its progenitor in basically every area. Not only was the story in a better place by focusing on what had worked in the original series, (Ya know the BAND part of this show about bands) but the cast was also doing a good job of standing out from their seniors and feeling more equally rounded out. Where the original series had just kinda been the Cyan show with guest stars, I felt like I had an actual grip on all four of the main girls now. There were however the usual issues that come with a cute-girls-doing-cute-things series, chief among them the “ambiguously gay member of the group who constantly reacts with clear romantic interest towards the main protagonist but the writing will never actually do anything with those feelings” trope. Retoree had spent the better part of the first two seasons fawning over Cyan only for nothing to come of it and, despite the increased focus on all of the girls this time around, it looked like we were going to get the same old song and dance with Himeko's feelings towards Howan. But then the climax of episode six hit and, midst a really intense subplot about Himeko's abandonment complex, Howan comes out with a straight up love confession. And I kept waiting for the usual dead-ends these moments always seem to have. The “I love you! I love the girls too! I love the band!” Or a “I love being with you.” and the dreaded, “I love having you as my most precious friend.” But none of that happened. It was a full on heart-felt, “I love you, Himeko. I want to stay with you forever!” I'm just not used to getting that sort of straightforwardness from my silly little band shows, so I was shocked, but also completely overjoyed. And frankly the series just kept getting better from there. The evolution of their relationship built off that moment, no dreaded resetting of the status quo. I daresay it was on the power of this moment alone that I wanted to include this series in my top five at all. If there was anything I would want other anime to take from Mashumairesh!! it's that it's okay to introduce radical changes to character relationships partway through a season, and it's okay to let characters unequivocally state their feelings for each other. People will respond positively to that earnestness, I promise.

#anime #keep your hands off eizouken!#sayaka kanamori #akudama drive #toilet-bound hanako-kun #kaguya sama wo kataritai #kaguya-sama love is war #dorohedoro #show by rock #show by rock mashumairesh!!#howan #mashima himeko #digimon #digimon adventure:#BNA #Brand New Animal #Night Running

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iron--spider · 4 years

Text

tattered and torn

The steel door swings open with a high-pitched squeal and Tony knows what’s gonna happen. Again.

His heart leaps into his throat and he can’t fucking do this, not again, not with these assholes. Not with any assholes, really, but these in particular are getting on his last fucking nerve. He and Peter just have to hold out a little bit longer, because Tony knows somebody is coming for them, he knows they have to be. Both Sam and Thor saw them get snatched, and leaving the savior of the fucking universe and Spider-Man himself with some enhanced thugs for more than twenty four hours isn’t really a good luck.

But these guys know Peter is Spider-Man now. They captured him as Spider-Man, took off his mask and looked at his face, and Tony hates them and calls them morons when they’re around, but he figures their higher ups have enough technology to run facial recognition through a couple databases. That puts May in danger, that puts the kid’s girlfriend in danger and all of his friends. That’s the kinda shit Tony’s been striving to avoid since day one.

But, at the current fucking moment, they only seem to be using the fact that Peter is Spider-Man to knock him around a shit ton.

Which, of course, isn’t cool with Tony.

“It’s okay,” Peter says, looking at him when the door opens, the two of them huddling in the corner. “Tony, it’s fine.” There are still open wounds on his face and neck. A broken blood vessel in his eye. The assholes ripped off his webshooters and took his mask, and the suit is tattered and torn.

Tony has to protect him. That’s all he’s good for and he has to be good for that.

“It’s not fucking fine,” Tony says, as the two dickheads that have been giving them problems step inside their cell. “It’s not goddamn fine.”

He had only been flying the fucking quinjet—he didn’t have a suit. He had the nano housing unit but not on him, and he feels like he makes more mistakes nowadays, after the snap and the near death and all that bullshit. He’s made up of mistakes and missed opportunities and a constant ringing in his ears. He’s all broken things, mismatched. He’s not Iron Man anymore. Not really. He’s an old man, by superhero standards, but sometimes he goes along on missions when he knows Peter will be in danger. But then he’s a distraction because Peter’s worried about him. He should always wear a suit, always, no matter what the fuck he’s doing. This proves it. Quinjets crash, people get fucking kidnapped. Always wear a suit.

“Tony, it’s okay—”

Both guys are wearing masks, one red and one black, and they loom over them.

“No, it’s not,” Tony hisses, and he throws his arm out across Peter’s chest, like that’s gonna fucking do something. He grits his teeth. “If you’re gonna hurt one of us, hurt me! Say you beat the shit out of Iron Man, that’ll do something for your reputation—”

Black mask laughs. “Spider-Man’s more our speed—”

“Beating up on a goddamn child, that’s cute, that’s real cute.” He doesn’t say he could kill you if you didn’t restrain him because he doesn’t want to give them any ideas about how strong Peter is. He has visions of experiments and torture and he doesn’t even know what this is, but he needs it done, now.

Tony tries to keep shielding him, but it doesn’t take much for them to reach around him and grab Peter up. Peter barely fights, just lets himself get dragged away.

“Tony, it’s fine! It’s fine, I promise!”

“No, goddamnit,” Tony growls, feeling sick and dizzy, and he throws a punch that connects with red mask’s jaw. He tries to retaliate but Tony slips under it and hits him again, trying to rush after black mask pulling Peter out of the room. “Kid! Kid!”

Red mask punches Tony once while he’s distracted, knocks him back against the wall. “Stop your bullshit or we’ll kill him and leave his body in here with you. How d’you like that, huh?”

He doesn’t wait for an answer, just quickly runs out the door and pulls it shut behind him. Tony rushes it, and slams on it hard, over and over, wishing he’d let the doctors take his arm now, wishing they hadn’t left him so weak and scarred and fucking useless. He could have figured out a prosthetic, he could have made something strong, he could have choked those two assholes out before they even touched his kid. Mistakes, missteps. Wrong, wrong, wrong. He saved the world but it keeps turning, and guys like this keep getting the upper hand.

Tony doesn’t want to yell Peter’s name, because he doesn’t want to give them any more clues to who he is in case they haven’t figured it out yet, but he continues to slam on the door until he feels like his arm is going to break off, until he feels like he did after he snapped, torn in half and burned and broken, being rushed off the battlefield by everyone he’d ever met and then some, carrying him like some cardboard cut-out Christ figure.

He remembers Peter’s tears. He remembers him whispering hold on, Tony, hold on. They were reverent with him. His kid, his team, his wife. That’s the last thing he remembers before the darkness, before everything changed. He didn’t have any thoughts in his head, couldn’t think about anything even if he wanted to.

This helplessness feels like that. It’s almost been a year and he’s still struggling. He wants to explode.

Tony paces back and forth in this goddamn steel box room and knows he doesn’t deserve the reverence they treated him with. He doesn’t deserve praise and billboards and national prayer. He doesn’t deserve that subreddit with all the morons talking about their favorite Iron Man memory. He doesn’t, because that should be him out there dealing with these assholes, Not Peter, Not Peter. Peter deserves ice cream sundaes with too much caramel, he deserves his favorite spot on the couch and dance parties Morgan initiates where they both make Tony dance. Tony doesn’t fucking dance anymore but whenever they drag him out onto the carpet he’ll do it because they’re his kids. He’ll dance to Whitney Houston for his kids. He’ll do whatever his kids want and then some.

Anything.

“Goddamnit,” he whispers, voice breaking somewhere in his throat. “God fucking dammit.”

This was Peter’s mission. He’d finally figured out where the Sinister Six were planning their next attack and those assholes are Spider-Man’s villains and nothing scared Tony more than looking at their rap sheets and knowing they were after his kid.

But then it went wrong, as these things often do, and Tony hates the idea of guilt swirling around in Peter’s head along with each crack across his cheek.

The waiting is agony. Agony. Seconds, minutes, hours, years, millennia. Tony paces until his feet hurt. He wears a path in the ground.

Tony, it’s fine. It’s fine, I promise.

“It’s not fine,” he whispers to himself, getting angry all over again, and wondering why Peter was so sure. Peter is strong, yes. He’s very strong. Out of this world, the best superhero Tony knows. The kid always thinks he’s larger than life but he’s still breakable, he can still be taken, and Tony knows that firsthand. Remembers the spot where he once was, a howling void next to him wherever he went, wherever he didn’t go, louder in the silence. Peter can still be killed, no matter how many hits he can take.

Tony stomps back over towards the door and resumes the banging.

“Fuck you, morons! Come get me, I’ll give you a run for your fucking money. I’m an old man now, sure, but I’m the reason you’re alive so you owe me. Gimme a good fight. I bet some of you were dust. I could have left you that way! My decision, pricks, all mine, get it fucking straight. Let’s go, cowards, come on, I’m ready for you! I’ll rip you a—”

The door starts to open and Tony takes a couple steps back. “Yeah, alright, good. I’m fucking ready, are you—”

Peter steps inside. He’s got a few more cuts and bruises on his face and he’s holding a set of keys. “Wow, that was—that was a lot of cursing. You’re really mad.”

Tony’s brain glitches for a couple seconds before he’s able to latch back on to reality, and he strides back over to Peter, taking his arm. “What’s going on? How much time do we have?”

“Probably a good amount of time,” Peter says, swallowing hard. He opens the door wider and looks back over his shoulder, and Tony follows his gaze—there are about six or seven dudes out there, splayed out on the ground, most of them webbed together. Some are webbed to the ceiling.

“Jesus,” Tony says, feeling a little guilty that he didn’t immediately imagine Peter getting the upper hand. “I couldn’t hear anything. None of this.”

“I could definitely hear you,” Peter says. He clears his throat and cracks his neck. “I wanted them to keep taking me out because I was getting a good look at where everything was—the computers, my webshooters, the keys—they’ve literally got a map on the wall. I just wanted to be—prepared for when I actually broke us out. And now I know where Steve and Clint are being held so we can grab them too on our way out. I think Thor is coming, that’s the only thing I’m not sure about. They’re tracking something approaching and it’s not one of theirs. But it’s still a good ways out.”

Tony sighs, staring at him for a second. “You’re too reckless with your own wellbeing.”

“But now we’re out, yeah?” Peter asks, blinking at him. “So. All good. Good things.

“You’re hurt,” Tony says. He takes Peter’s chin gently and turns his face, and he can tell they were hitting him with brass knuckles. It makes his own cheeks burn with rage. “Not a good thing. A bad thing.”

“I’m okay,” Peter says, reaching up and covering Tony’s hand, pulling it down and squeezing it. “And now we can get out, we’re prepared, we can go chase down Electro and the others and finish what I started. Finally. Get them sent to the Raft, keep everybody safe.”

Tony nods at him, trying to breathe. “I wanna back you up, but I don’t have—”

“Oh,” Peter says. He tugs Tony out into the main atrium and drops the keys on a table, picking up the nano housing unit. “I found it too. I don’t even think they knew what it was.”

“Morons,” Tony says. Peter holds it out to him and Tony takes it, blowing out a breath. “Alright,” he says. “I’m gonna do better out there than I did in here. Swear. I’m not gonna let anything happen to you—”

“And right back at you,” Peter says, smiling. “Because we’ve got Morgan’s recital this weekend and then Pepper is making the scalloped potatoes and neither one of us are missing either one of those things.”

Tony nods at him, feeling particularly emotional right here in the middle of this fucking enemy lair. He nods, swallowing over the lump in his throat, and brushes some of Peter’s hair out of his eyes. He hopes they can reclaim the quinjet or steal another vehicle so he can tend to some of the kid’s wounds.

“Alright, bud,” Tony says, too proud for words almost all of the time, when it comes to Peter. “Lead the way.”

#tony stark #peter parker #iron man #spider-man #my fics #iron dad #this is like a tony introspective #i've had a difficult day so i apologize this was late

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elitparadox · 3 years

Text

Life Goes On~ (Pt. 3)

Description: you suddenly appear in haikyuu after watching the show for weeks now, and you’re trying to find a way out after learning from these talented characters. you weren’t meant to fall in love with any of them, but with osamu’s alluring formosity and talent, you can’t help but rethink your life that has led up to this exact moment.

Genre: fluff, slight crack, slow burn

feat: miya osamu x f!reader

word count: 1.3k

status: ongoing

parts: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

Then it hits you. Time. You never thought about it, yet now another wave of panic is crashing down on you, more insistent this time. What about my family? They'll go crazy! And when I finally get back, they'll- *you start mentally sniffling* -they might forget me! And I won't have any food! I'll be homeless! what am I going to do what am I going to do what am I going to-

"Um, hello?" Osamu interrupts your thoughts, snapping his fingers in front of your face.

“Ah, sorry. But we should be sleeping... anyways… good night!”

You curl into a ball, the cold air still reaching your body despite the blankets.

“Ok. Night!” Osamu sighs, trudging to another bedroom.

You try to sleep, but a hurricane of convoluted thoughts swirl throughout your mind, devastating every morally supportive reminder as you contemplate if you should retrace your steps. You count sheep, like a totally normal person would when sleep doesn’t come to them, but it doesn’t work. Then you remember how you would usually go outside, nature doing its job for you.

You slip out of the apartment, trying to stay as quiet as you can.

That doesn’t happen, obviously.

“Ow!” You swear as you bump into a sharp edge on the counter near the exit door.

The door slams closed, almost on your bare foot.

“How graceful.” You walk up the apartment stairs, reaching a latch leading to the top. As you open it, the sudden wind nearly topples you off your feet like a harsh admonishment to stay away.

“Wow. It’s cold up here. I mean, of course it would be.”

The cold washes over your body as a layer- frigid instead of warm. You shiver, your body temperature seeming to slowly decrease by the second. But the stars shine light upon you like a spotlight, but even better. It was a burst of temporary happiness and ideas.

You walk toward the edge of the balcony deck, leaning onto the parapet.

“Life goes on, and every second matters. But, I need to find a way out of here. How am I going to stay? I don’t even know how I got here. This is just great. I don’t want to depend on anyone ‘cuz i feel like i need to owe-”

You don’t realize you’re muttering sleepily to yourself until a voice behind you makes you jump literally five feet in the air.

“Why are you up here?”

You whip around to find Osamu standing there, and you let out a sigh of relief because you were actually expecting a janitor to say this.

“Um, well, long story short- I couldn’t sleep.”

He looks back and forth at your dreamy visage and your shivering self.

“You’re going to catch a cold. Jus’ come inside.”

Without responding, you turn back toward the night sky with its brilliant stars illuminating the bright bustling city below. The whispering wind blows loose strands of your somehow silky hair across your face, and with the surprisingly calming feeling radiating from osamu, you fall asleep, your head nestled in your folded arms. (and osamu has to give you a piggyback down the stairs into his bedroom btw absolutely nothing nasty happens)

The morning settles over you slowly like the unfolding blatant truth. Rubbing your eyes and sitting up, you look around, unable to believe that you’re not in your room, because you half-expected that what happened before was all a dream, except you can’t dream a dream in a dream.

So, you know the usual morning routine, you get out of bed, brush your teeth, get dressed, and figure a way out of here (which isn’t what you would normally do, but change of plans..)

It was then you noticed Osamu cooking some other delicacy in the kitchen.

Your heart softens like syrup on waffles, because never before had anyone done this for a stranger like you, and you say “Samu, you don’t have to do all this for ME. don’t you have bigger fish to fry? Besides i have to find a way out- i mean, leave soon-”

“OK, but do you know where you’re going? You seem new to this town…”

You gulped. Your ideas for returning home seemed futile now. You couldn’t wait forever, you didn’t have any way to travel back, and, for the sake of osamu, you couldn’t stay in his apartment for as long as you had to (which could be years)!

Please let this be a dream. Please let this be a dream. Please-

Osamu chuckles slightly while frying eggs on a pan, pulling you out of your thoughts. “You don’t know, don’t you?”

“Like I said…” And, too mentally exhausted for lies, you reiterate how you were brought here.

As you catch your breath, you look at Osamu. Is that amusement in his eyes?

“No, seriously! That’s legit what happened, okay? Why would I lie about this?” You insist, frustration clawing its way up your stomach.

He seems thoughtful for a silent minute. “No idea. You don’t seem to be lying… but should I take you to the therapist? I think they could help. By the way, what’s your name? I can’t believe I forgot to ask you this.”

“Y/N. And I don’t need to go to the therapist! I’m telling you, this is what happened! And I don’t know where I’m going to stay for possibly the rest of my life!”

You sigh, the frustration already kindling a fire in your eyes, slumping down on the couch.

“Hey.” The previous glint in his eyes disappear like mist as he strides in long graceful steps toward you (after turning down the cooktop temperature) “Jus’ calm down already. I’ll help ya if ya need it. Besides, would staying in my apartment really hurt ya?”

“Okay..” you say slowly because you’re trying not to think about the way his hand is surprisingly on your shoulder. “But only if you can help me with volleyball.”

To spend the time, you think silently.

The look on Osamu’s face was priceless. Actually, it wasn’t. Because his expression was as blank as a fresh sheet of paper.

“What?” He asked like I’d just sprouted two heads.

“What do you mean what? Is it so wrong that I ask you for volleyball help when you’re an awesome spiker in Inarizaki?”

Oop. Major oop.

“How do you know that I’m in-”

“Ok okokokkkkkkk” You drag out the word, trying to think of an excuse during these seconds.

“Welp.. we’re near Inarizaki High, so isn’t it obvious that every high schooler from this neighborhood goes there?”

Now it was his turn to be embarrassed. “Oh yeah. Sorry.”

Realizing something else, he adds, “But didn’t you say that you don’t come from here?”

“Oh yeah. I forgot to mention, you’re part of a popular TV series”

“What?”

Now you’re starting to think he’s a total dumbass like his brother. “I said what I said.”

“Okay. I don’t believe ya, but sure.”

“Anyways… are you gonna help train me or do you not have the time?”

That new notion hits you hard. You came here for the practice, not for the pure joy of exploring a different world...

Noticing your flustered expression, Osamu says, “I don’t have much time with all my schoolwork… but I’ll help you during the weekends and you can come watch my team’s drills and sometimes practice matches..”

“Really??? You’d do that??”

“Yes” he says with a straight face, but deep inside, his heart is fluttering ever so slightly from your overjoyed expression.

Now this… was a start.

Glancing over Osamu’s shoulder, you ask, “Aren’t those eggs getting cold?”

(requests are OPEN) hope yall like it!! tag list: @omiomi-zoomizoomi @liechelia @sillyanimedream @niconiconiithot987

#haikyuu x reader #hq!!#haikyuu!!#miya osamu #haikyuu scenarios #miya osamu x y/n #haikyuu #miya osamu x reader #osamu x y/n

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snowpeawritings · 4 years

Text

Sherlock Holmes is horny wow who knew

DGS Sherlock Holmes x Female Reader

my absolute monkey brain idea. The second commissioned piece from @fleeting-fantasy where they wanted a spicy DGS sherlock holmes piece!

Consider commissioning/donating on my ko-fi!

CW (CONTENT WARNING): Sexual scenes

Sometimes, you didn’t like that you were the one Holmes would use his experiments on.

You trust the man with your life, that much was certain. But there was a point where you would say no to the most insane things the detective can come up with and he will comply (not without a bit of whining). As much as you love to have Holmes make forward progress towards the betterment of today’s technology, you didn’t want to be his guinea pig.

There were some inventions that he takes pride on, like his tool that detects blood and his goggles atop of his head. But there were some inventions, albeit completely absurd, that he really takes pride on.

Such is the case right now.

A tiny little thing, almost the size of a bullet. But he makes sure to coerce you by the best of his ability for you to wear it.

The moment he turned it on, you cried out from the weird sensation that carried over to your clit. He turned it off and you took the time to lie down and catch your breath.

“I guess it’s a success.” He hummed, prying your shaky thighs apart in order to see his invention situated on your center. The little bullet was like a shiny beacon on your clit, a tiny thing that held so much power courtesy of Sherlock who wanted to see how much it affected you. Maybe he shouldn’t have placed it on the highest setting for your first time.

You finally caught your breath, glancing up at Holmes. “You… Just what in the world is this?!”

He chuckled, bringing his finger to his forehead to show his thinking expression. “An invention I made to spice up the bedroom! Of course, I’ll be the only one using this and you’ll be the only one subject to this.”

How he purred out those words made you shudder. You sat yourself up on your elbows, staring at the detective before looking down at your core. The thing still shined like it was taunting you.

“And why, pray tell, would you make an invention for the bedroom?” You groaned out.

He chuckled once more, bringing himself down in order to be eye level to your pussy as your thighs shook once more. “Why, you ask? Who wouldn’t want to see their darling so completely debauched by one tiny thing?”

You shivered from his tone, his words igniting a flash of heat across your stomach and your core. He inched further, fingers smoothing over the inside of your thighs. He moved one hand, his index finger nearing dangerously near the little switch that turned it on.

Yet he made no move to turn it on. He looked at you expectantly, waiting for your consent. You looked down at him then his finger inching towards the switch.

You let out a defeated sigh. “Is there no power level?”

At that, he giggled. “What’s the point of that if I always have it on the highest level?”

Before you could understand his sentence, he flicked it to life, the vibrations immediately attacking your clit as you threw your head back.

“Absolutely breathtaking…” He sighed out, nuzzling his cheek against your inner thigh as you quivered from the sensations.

Your elbows couldn’t even support you anymore so your back hit his mattress. You felt one of his hands grasp your flailing ones as you grabbed onto it as tight as you could. The little bullet on your clit had you already writhing on the bed, the sensations being so foreign but somehow being so good. You debated on asking Holmes if he could make another one for him.

Yet you couldn’t finish that train of thought before Holmes pressed it harder against your clit. You screamed out from the force, gasping out his name as you grabbed his hand tighter.

He let out a low groan from his name, looking at your arched back as if he was looking at a piece of art. He didn’t need his goggles to see every detail, to see your chest heaving up and down, to see your wetness seeping against the mattress. No, this is what Holmes wanted; to see his darling scream his name and come using his invention.

The thought immediately sent a shot of arousal into his groin, his cock straining against his trousers as he pressed harder. This time, he used his mouth and latched on to the source of the wetness on his bed.

Your hips bucked, thighs wrapping around his head as he groaned. “H-Holmes…!”

He thanked god Naruhoudo and Susato took Iris out today for he doesn’t want to have Iris hear how much you were screaming his name. His tongue flattened against your labia, gathering your addictive essence into his mouth as he growled from the taste. He continued to taste you before he had the tip of his tongue enter inside of you.

If it was possible for your thighs to crush his head, he would accept it willingly. You gasped and screamed out his name, your hand practically crushing his while your other tore holes through the comforter on how hard you were grasping it. He continued to thrust his tongue in and out of you, feeling the vibrations on your clit as he brought you closer and closer to release.

He felt your legs quiver and he removed himself from your core and released your hand. You whined from the lack of sensation but gasped when you felt his fingers, two of them, prod your entrance before thrusting inside and curling against your wet walls.

A few more curls before you gasped out Holmes’s name, your pussy shaking as your essence spread across his fingers and his mouth. It dripped below onto the mattress, creating a wet spot as you continued your orgasm.

“Good girl,” he hummed, smoothing your thighs, “that’s a good girl.”

You whined from the praise, recovering from your high as you tried to verbalize the experience you had. All you could get out were whimpers and little mewls but the detective seemed to understand judging from the little smirk on his face.

“I call that a success.” He said, looking like the cat who got the cream.

With all your energy, you slapped his arm weakly. “Too much for me…”

He hummed at your response, removing the invention from your clit as he tried to maneuver around with an erection in his pants. Getting a warm washcloth, he cleaned the apex of your thighs.

“I’ll make some modifications.” He said and he had to hold back a chuckle when you let out a sigh of relief. “Do you have any recommendations?”

You thought about it for a moment before settling on an answer. “Make sure you use that only for me and no one else. Got it?”

He let out his signature laughs, lifting your leg in order to kiss your knee. “If that is what my lady wishes.”

#commissions #dgs #dai gyakuten saiban #ace attorney #ace attorney imagines #dgs sherlock holmes #dgs sherlock holmes imagines #dgs sherlock holmes x reader #snowpea thirsts for lemonade #fleeting-fantasy

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fluffy-lee · 4 years

Text

Coming Home

Part 5 of the series "Keeping Her"

This is a TICKLE series. If you're not into that, you don't have to read.

PLATONIC Avengers x reader

Warnings: swearing

Summary: The Avengers return home after a weekend away on a mission, and Y/n returns home from the Parker's. Meanwhile, Peter is very happy to expose a little something he learned about Y/n over the weekend.

Two days after the events of "Best Friend."

After completing their mission in Austria, the Avengers loaded the Quinjet, eager to return home.

“Alright, FRIDAY. Get us home to Y/n.” Tony instructed, sitting down in the pilot’s seat.

Steve smiled to himself. He always missed Y/n when they were gone for too long. Y/n somehow made his world so much brighter, even after the ugliest of missions. All the Avengers felt that way.

Tony launched the jet into the air and when they were at a steady elevation, Bucky walked over by Tony. “Let’s call and see how Y/n is doing.”

“FRIDAY, call Mr. Parker please.” Tony said. He was really wanting to check in on the kids, since he had no contact with them for nearly three days.

“Calling Peter Parker.”

Peter answered the phone as he was sitting at his desk in his room. “Hey Mr. Stark! Is everyone alright?”

“Hey ‘roos! We’re all good. Kicked some butt and coming home in one piece. How is everything?”

“Awesome, and we’re great! Hey Buck! I’m assuming you guys want to see Y/n. She’s in the kitchen making cookies with May. I’ll take you to her.” Peter said cheerfully, walking to the kitchen.

Everyone on the jet crowded around the large screen in front of Tony, and they all witnessed Peter trip over nothing and drop his phone.

“Ah fuck. I mean, oh shit! No! I mean.. Gosh darn it.” Peter rambled, cringing at himself as he picked his phone off the floor and made his way down the hallway.

The Avengers were in hysterics, except for Tony, who buried his head in his arms.

“Y/n, look who it is!” Peter sang, showing her the screen as she stood in front of a bowl of cookie dough, rolling it into balls. Her y/e/c eyes looked up to the phone and she smiled her sweet smile. She had her hair in a messy ponytail and wore May’s cute pink apron.

Y/n’s P.O.V.

“NATASHA! Hey! I miss you so much!” You beamed, ignoring all the other guys on the ship.

The guys chorused in “wow” “ouch” “aww” while Natasha smiled proudly. She was your mentor, after all, and you two were very close. “I miss you too, Y/n!”

“Hey everyone, I miss you all as well!” You giggled, reaching up and feeding Peter some cookie dough.

“Seems like staying with the Parker’s was a good idea, huh?” Tony asked.

“Yes, it has been so much fun! I don’t even want you guys to come home!” You joked. You really were dying to see them and sleep in your own bed. Some times Peter snored and talked in his sleep.

(Flashback to the night before)

You were sound asleep in Peter’s bottom bunk bed, snuggled up in a burrito of fuzzy blankets that Peter had wrapped you in to keep you warm. He and May liked to keep the apartment cold at night and Peter liked to have the fan on in his room while he slept, so he wanted to make sure you were warm enough, since you get cold easily.

The bed would sometimes squeak when Peter would turn in his sleep on the top bunk above you, but it didn’t disturb you. The only problem you faced was Peter would sometimes snore and also talk in his sleep, and it wouldn’t make you grumpy like it would most people, it would make you have to struggle for several minutes not to laugh because you were awkward and scared of waking him up.

“Mr. Stark, May said that I DESERVE a puppy, so give me a FREAKING puppy because I AM A GOOD BOY.” Peter cried in his sleep.

You just couldn’t help yourself and you burst into hysterical laughter, waking Peter.

“Y/n? Why are you laughing?” Peter said groggily as he shuffled in the bed above you.

Through your laughter, you mimicked what he had said in his sleep.

“I did not!” Peter exclaimed, hanging upside down, beside you.

“Yohohohu dihihihid!”

Peter blushed as you made fun of him. “I’ll give you something to laugh about.” Peter grabbed your feet and began scribbling all over them, making your laughter escalate as you desperately tried to pull your feet away. Now you were the one blushing. He just found out how ticklish you were the other night, so he was using it against you whenever he got the chance.

Peter evilly laughed as he latched onto your knees, squeezing them repeatedly. You could barely move due to the tickling and the heavy weight of blankets you had now tangled yourself in. All you could do was pull a blanket up to muffle your laughter, not wanting to wake May.

Peter stopped tickling your knees and nuzzled in your neck, which tickled you like crazy, along with his curls tickling your ear and cheek. Your squeaky laughter turned silent when he blew a raspberry. Peter quit his torture and sat up and you struggled to catch your breath.

“When I was tickling your feet, I noticed how cold they were! I’ll get you some socks.” He chuckled, while you continued recovering from his tickle attack. You were blushing so bad, as it was a very unexpected 3:00 AM tickle attack from your best friend.

You threw the blankets off and sat up on the bed. The cold air hit your skin, making you shiver. You slipped on the fuzzy Chewbacca socks he handed you and you began to feel really tired again. Peter ruffled your hair and shoved you back down gently, making you giggle.

“Time to go back to sleep, you dork.” Peter teased, wrapping you back up in the blankets.

“Goodnight... I hope Mr. Stark gets you that puppy because you’re a GOOD BOY!” You exclaimed dramatically, making Peter roll his eyes. “Do NOT tell anybody about that.” He kissed your head and climbed back up to his bed.

Butterflies swarmed in your stomach from Peter’s tickles, and his overall sweetness, and after a few minutes, you fell back asleep.

(end flashback)

“Oh you just wait til I get home, Y/n. You’re gonna get it!” Bucky threatened teasingly. You just giggled and rolled your eyes at him.

“Okay, we’ll see you two tonight.” Tony said ending the conversation.

…

Happy arrived to pick you and Peter up from his apartment around 5:00 PM. Happy made Peter drive back, so you sat snuggled up in the backseat behind Peter in your warm coat and pink blanket. You hadn’t learned to drive yet, but seeing Peter drive made you really want to learn. You wanted to be just like Peter, but not in the way you were jealous of him. You just really looked up to him, so now that he had found out your little secret, you were getting butterflies every time you played the events back in your head. You definitely wanted Peter to tickle you again, but you weren’t sure how to get him to, without becoming annoying. As these thoughts swarmed your head, you focused on Peter’s hand that you could see on the steering wheel. He had his web-shooter wrapped around his wrist, next to his brown leather watch. The long car ride made you doze off to sleep.

…

You woke up to the sound of Peter and Happy speaking. You were stopped at a gas station and Happy had gone inside. Peter turned around to see you were awake.

“If you need to go to the bathroom or get a snack, you can now.” Peter said softly.

“I’m good, actually.”

Peter nodded and stepped out of the car and began pumping gas. You tiredly watched him through the window. You couldn’t help but chuckle when his curls blew all in his face from the rainy wind. He saw you were laughing at him and rolled his eyes.

When he was done, he got back in the driver’s seat.

“If you want, Y/n, you can just come live with May and I forever! You’re pretty fun to be around.” Peter said.

“Mmm I’d prefer you move out and I just live with May. You snore too loud and climb all over the walls.” You sassed. You were in such a sassy mood and you weren’t sure why. It may be because you were in such a lee mood lately.

Peter was just silent. You smiled to yourself, waiting to hear his response. Instead of speaking, Peter just leaned his seat all the way back onto you, and flipped over to where he was basically laying on you, with the seat between you both. You giggled at him, confused as to why he was doing that.

“You really are just asking for trouble, huh?” Peter said, before launching his fingers under your arms, much to your surprise. He dug in, making you squeal with laughter. You were barely able to move anywhere. He vibrated his fingertips in the hollows under your arms and all down your ribs and all you could do was laugh and squirm.

“What was that tickle spot of yours again? You know, the one that really makes you giggle?”

You knew exactly which spot he was talking about and your heart dropped and your ears burned red. Peter had stopped his tickles and tapped his chin like he was thinking.

“Oh, I remember! The very middle of your tummy, right here.” He teased as he used all ten of his fingers to dig in to your death spot. You thrashed and laughed like crazy until your laughter went silent. Peter just chuckled evilly at you. His hands were pretty much hidden under the seat, so it was hard to see where he was going to get you next. It made it tickle so much more.

“PEHEHETER STAHAHAP! I cahahan’t take it!” You shouted through your laughter. You didn’t want him to stop but it was too much to bare.

“Okay, okay.” Peter chuckled, stopping when you asked him to. He was grinning at you. You hid your face in your hands. Peter pulled them away and you blushed more.

“Man... you’re ticklish!” Peter stated, teasingly. You were too flustered to even reply.

“Does anyone else know? Like Bucky, or Steve, or Tony?”

“ALL of the Avengers know. They’ve known for years now.” You admitted.

“Oh, you poor, poor thing.” Peter laughed.

You nodded sheepishly. “I’m surprised you didn’t find out sooner.”

“Oh, I’ll make up for it.”

Just then, Happy got back to the car.

“Peter. Why do you have your seat leaned back on Y/n?” He asked as he strapped in and passed out the snacks.

“She asked for it.” Peter smirked.

“Leave poor Y/n alone, would ya? Or you could just squeeze her sides. That’s what Nat usually does.” Happy said with a grin.

You felt the butterflies in your stomach swarm for the hundredth time.

Peter raised an eyebrow at you. “Good to know!” He raised his seat up and got ready to get back on the road.

…

You arrived back at the compound at dark. You were happy to be home and so excited to see everyone. You were also excited you didn’t have to say goodbye to Peter for a few days. You rode up the elevator and dropped your stuff off in your room. Then, you raced down the stairs, to find the Avengers home, scattered around the living room and kitchen.

“DADDY!” You exclaimed, launching into Bucky’s arms.

“My Y/n/n! I missed you so much.” He said, lifting you up. You buried your face in his neck and squeezed him tight.

“Was the mission scary?” You asked. Bucky chuckled and shook his head.

“We took care of business and helped a whole lot of people.” He said.

Steve then walked over and extended his arms to you. You smiled brightly and hugged him.

After reuniting with everyone and hanging out, everyone went their separate ways, mostly to their quarters. It was now you, Bucky, Steve, Tony, Natasha, and Peter hanging out. They were telling you and Peter all about the mission. Whenever the details got heavy, you’d snuggle closer to Nat. It was hard for you to imagine them going through these things, even though you had personally seen it. You didn’t have powers. You were being highly trained in combat and you knew how to use a lot of weapons. You had perfect aim, like your father. It just came so naturally to you. You considered being the daughter of Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, former officer of the 107th Infantry Regiment, to be quite an honor.

“Don’t worry, kiddo. We’re tough, and so are you.” Nat reassured, gently combing your hair out of your face. You smiled at her.

“It’s true that Y/n is tough,” Peter started, with a hint of mischief in his voice. “But she does have such a strong weakness that I’ve recently discovered. It’s very, very concerning. It could be the death of her!”

Your stomach dropped and your face burned red. Everyone looked at you concerned.

“Peter. Staaahahap!” You whined.

Steve and Bucky exchanged looks and seemed to catch on with Peter before he even addressed what exactly he was talking about.

“Y/n’s sooooo ticklish!” Peter teased, wiggling his fingers at you from where he sat.

You felt as if you were going to die from embarrassment.

“Is she? I had no idea!” Tony said with a highly sarcastic tone.

“Y/n is NOT ticklish! I know for a fact that she isn’t. At all!” Steve joined, copying the same tone.

Natasha giggled. “I have a feeling this isn’t going to end well for you.”

You hid your face in a throw pillow. You loved these moments, when the people you loved gave you butterflies and exposed your ticklishness, but you’d never admit it.

“Yeah, she’s not ticklish. I can prove it!” Bucky pulled your legs out so you were laying flat on the couch between him and Nat. He began scribbling his fingers all over your ribs, tummy, and sides. You shrieked with laughter and curled in on yourself. Bucky ceased his tickles to listen to Peter who had walked over and knelt by the couch, so he was next to you. He was telling everyone about how he found out your “weakness” and how there may be no cure.

“It is terribly concerning,” Bucky said, widening his eyes at you, before scribbling again like before. You were sent back into laughter as you felt his fingers dancing across your belly.

“Natasha! Save me!” You yelled through your hysterics.

“I’m sorry, but I think this may be good for you.” She said with a sly smile. “Tire her out for me, boys. She needs to sleep well tonight, so she can be ready for training in the morning.” Natasha left you to face the tickle monsters.

“Ah, that reminds me. Happy said that Nat squeezes her sides?” Peter asked. You threw your arms down to your sides, attempting to block any coming attacks.

Steve took Nat’s place and grabbed your arms and pinned them above your head.

“Yes,” Bucky smirked. “If you get right here under her ribs and just gently squeeze, she’ll giggle!”

Before you knew it, you were giggling adorably, and trying to pull away. Steve released you, so you wouldn’t pass out and just enjoyed giggling at you in your ticklish state.

“Do you know her most ticklish spot, Buck?” Peter asked, while Bucky gave you a break, allowing you to curl in on yourself and catch your breath.

You looked over at Tony who was in the recliner. He had been observing this whole adorable scene play out and seemed to have an idea in mind. He held his finger up at you, as if to say “hang on a minute” and gave you a wink.

“You know, I’m not sure. I guess just... everywhere!” Bucky answered, squeezing your knees. Of course, you squealed and wiggled.

“I noticed that if you tickle the very middle of her tummy, above her belly button, she’ll… well, let me just show you.” Peter explained, before digging into your death spot. This really is what Peter wanted to show everyone all along, because your reaction was just priceless. It brought out your famous belly laugh that everyone longs to hear from you. This spot tickled so much you could barely even squirm around, you just collapsed into that laughter. It was your favorite too, though it was almost unbearable.

“Y/n… why didn’t you tell me about this?” Bucky teased through gritted teeth, after Peter let you catch your breath. You blushed and grinned at Bucky.

“I didn’t know about it either,” you shrugged cutely. Bucky just burst out laughing, along with everyone else, and began to tickle you the same way Peter had showed them, causing the same reaction.

Bucky tickled you longer with some help from Peter. He went pretty easy on you since he had already made you laugh so hard from your most ticklish spot. When he let you go, you retaliated and attacked Bucky with tickles on his sides and his neck. His laughter erupted throughout the room for a moment, until he grabbed your wrists and wrestled you back down.

“You really think you can tickle me, huh? You think you can get away with that? How about this? Tickletickletickletickletickletickle!” Bucky growled playfully. His metal hand went under your shirt and tickled all over your ribs and side, making you silent laugh.

After your playful antics had subsided and you were all worn out, you saw Tony creep up behind Peter, before tackling him to the ground.

“Y/n, I think there’s something you should know about your friend Peter here.” Tony said, mischievously.

“Nononono Mr. Stark! No please don’t! I’m sorry pleeease don’t!” Peter begged and squirmed while Tony straddled him. Peter knew exactly what was coming. You couldn’t believe what was happening.

“Peter. Just let me tickle you.” Tony said with such a straight face, it was making YOU blush.

“Nohohohohooo!” Peter melted into giggles before Tony even did anything.

“I just have to show Y/n how much worse you are than her, Spider-Man.” And with that, Tony shot his fingers into Peter’s armpits.

Peter dissolved into hysterics.

#avengers x reader tickle fic #avengers tickle fic #avengers tickle #avengers x reader tickle #tickle #tickle fic #platonic tickles #peter parker x reader tickle #peter parker tickle #bucky barnes x reader tickle #bucky barnes tickle #marvel tickle fic #marvel tickle #mcu tickle #mcu tickle fic

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torivikachu · 3 years

Text

I was just listening to Hamilton AGAIN - yeah I just put it on while working all the time - and it just hit me how really relatable Hamilton (or I mean, Lin-Manuel's interpretation of him) is. well, at least for me.

if you're wondering if this is worth your time it is NOT

anybody except me likes lists? I like lists. so let's make a list!

also let's see how many quotes can I fit into this post

whoa, I am excited about it.

1. the moment he meets Aaron Burr, he just sorta searches for something to bond over. like, hey dude I heard you went to Princeton? I wanna go there too, let's bond over it! by the way, I punched someone there lol I swear I am not stupid aand Burr, like um, no, thanks really, I better go, you seem violent, my parents wanted me to go there, okay, and Ham like WHOA YOU AN ORPHAN? WOW I AM TOO IT'S LIKE FATE OR SOMETHING LETS BOND and Aaron like wtf dude just shut up

and honestly that's just me, if I meet a person I like I will latch onto anything and I get sorta...fixated? so yeah, this dialogue is relatable as fuck

2. and Alex doesn't shut up, but then he goes all or am I talking too much?

bro, your anxiety shows.

3. and he keeps ranting all through the show, but his rants seem to charm everybody while I think mine just annoy and scare away? whatever, moving on, with Washington asking him why are you upset and he's replying IM NOT like a fucking teenager and it's probably a small thing but it's relatable as hell

4. and then once he is given permission he dives and buries himself into work, never does things halfway and is eager to take on more responsibilities and do something new and is just generally non-stop and while I can only wish for same energy as he, I like to have a lot of work aswell (well I sure as hell whine about it a lot but Hamilton does too! what's with I havent slept in a week I was weak I was awake you've never seen a bastard orphan more in need of a break)

5. he's flirty and has no qualms with innuendos. and very forward with his feelings? like you strike me like a woman who has never been satisfied sounds like a pickup line that either gonna win him a lot more than a number or fail miserably. he's like going all out, wearing his heart on his sleeve, and if it takes fighting a war for us too meet it will have been worth it and like seriously? yeah, flirt with every person in the room without skipping a beat, why not? he literally said on one intake of breath mr lafayette hard rock like lancelott i think your pants look hot laurens i like you a lot. he compliments people, he just throws it out instantly, most times he meets someone for the first time he compliments them and it's kind of my strategy too? it's not even a strategy, I just blurt out everything I like about a person once I meet them. it's like embarassing, because I liked a piece of jewelery on my co-worker once, and she was talking about something important while I could barely keep up because I kept thinking wow it looks great I gotta let her know. this strange need of mine to voice all thoughts annoys even me sometimes,

6. and then again, when he is angry or doesn't like something, it's painfully obvious. I don't tend to sprout profanities to people I don't like or saying stuff like madison you mad as hatter son take your medicine or you must be out of your GODDAMN mind or you absolutely right John should have shot him in mouth that would've shut him up but I can't school my face so it is always transparent what I am thinking about so my dislike is noted and not appreciated. it got me into enough embarassing situations. actually when studied in lyceum (like a sort of highschool) we had a principal and she addressed us as children and told us to call her mom and every time I was like WHAT THE HELL. I remember her eyes landing on me one time she said that and she almost did a doubletake at my facial expression. so the I'M NOT YOUR SON sentiment is not lost on me.

7. he speaks his mind when he thinks advice is in order? um if you love this woman go get her or for once in your life take a stand with pride. I tend to do it too, because I get winded up pretty fast, and I don't think it's always wise, because it's easy to judge from outside. I am pretty much sure that is the reason one of my friends back from school stopped talking to me. she had a bit of situation with her boyfriend and I still think her boyfriend is a piece of shit and she shouldn't have accepted him back, but whatever. wasn't my place to give advice, apparently

8. he gets overexcited? gentlemen of the jury I am curious bear with me are you aware that we are making history? like really I can't imagine ever getting like that at court. well I can imagine, because I get overexcited too, but saying that out loud? i'd be mortified

9. he's never satisfied? I know I already sorta covered it already, but it's more about him eager to learn and do more and feeling that what he's done and learnt is not enough, never enough. I so feel him on this, it's like yeah sure I know 4 languages, but that can't be enough can it? yeah I've got one degree but that's just ONE DEGREE that's like minimum I gotta get more

10. I know I talk too much I'm abrasive and I am not quoting Hamilton I am talking about myself thank you very much

11. he's a whiny bitch: but they don't have a plan they just hate mine -oh yes- or whatever it is Jefferson started it -huh yes sure-

12. forgetting your sons birthday? I forget my own age, sis. these little details just escape my attention. I like forgot it was my boyfriend's birthday this year - we literally live in the same flat. it took me a couple hours and a reminder from facebook. literally. and then I'll try to get away - hahaha it's like me saying to my parents - oh sure I'll some visit in a couple of months (they live in another part of the country) and then in a half a year being like oh wow when was the last time I went home

13. oh, here comes some more heavy stuff - say no to this. I was in a couple situations where I lost this battle. I think I have some polyamorous tendencies? but I am also very posessive and jealous, yeah, not a great mix, I know. so, I might have sorta dated two girls at one time once. well, not really dated, we were just bi-curious with one? we were friends, just... um, trying things. and then at some point I met another girl and it escalated pretty quickly and we sorta got together (oh my god the whole situation was a mess I was so confused about my sexuality back then and so ashamed you have no idea) and I didn't break it off with the first girl, but it was okay since we weren't... a thing? they knew each other but had no idea I slept with both of them. well we haven't really gotten that far with the first one but. and then the other asked at some point if she's the only one I do this with and I lied and a month into this endeavor I realized it was too much and sorta stopped seeing the first girl. we also stopped being close friends pretty soon afterwards. all my "lovestories" are embarassing actually, but this one is also the one I am most ashamed of. and then there were many situations in life when I was attracted to multiple people at the same time and ugh, I don't know, I kind of hate it, honestly. cheating is not okay. it is okay if everybody is okay with the polyamorous relationship though, but I never got to do it. so, yeah Ham's a dick but so am I

and on that depressing note I wanna wrap it up because I sorta killed the mood with that story. i think that's called oversharing?

if you actually read it to this point - wtf, you have nothing better to do or what?

I am not even gonna tag it so people don't have to scroll over that shit while searching for good content really I just like writing

the whole time I've been writing this my cat just kept staring at me. unblinkingly. I can feel her JUDGING ME

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ljandersen · 4 years

Text

Romance

Pairing: FemShep/Kaidan Alenko, ME-3

Words count: 2000

Summary: Teased by the crew for being unromantic, Shepard whisks Kaidan off to the hot springs discovered on her last ground mission.

________________________________

Metal rattled around them as they entered the planet’s atmosphere. Kaidan’s armor scraped against the steel wall of the shuttle. Overhead, Shepard swayed on feet holding tight to the ceiling handle.

This wasn’t what he’d expected. When Shepard summoned him to the cargo bay, he had still been thinking about her suggestive comment from earlier. Something about proving she was romantic no matter what anyone said. When he saw her waiting for him by the shuttle, his heart had lifted. It was just them. Them and Cortez. Then he realized something else. She was in full armor.

“Get suited up, Alenko. Stop lollygagging.” She’d clapped her hands at him but with a wink.

That had confused him even more. He was confused now. He checked the heat clip on his Talon then reviewed the cryo weapon updates on his ‘Tool. They were all properly installed. He was ready. Ready for what, he had no idea. She hadn’t briefed him.

“Hey.” Shepard shook his shoulder. “Don’t worry. Wait to see where I’m taking you. It has a good view.”

“Good view?” Kaidan repeated and got to his feet. “This isn’t a ground mission, is it?”

“Not in the typical sense.” She bit her bottom lip and grinned.

Kaidan’s blood pressure spiked. This did have something to do with her earlier comment then.

“Why the armor then?”

“Better to be armed and ready just in case, right? Especially if your shuttle’s not at hand.”

Kaidan glanced at the back of Cortez’s head. “Hmm.”

He smiled so wide his cheeks hurt. It probably revealed more than he really wanted to show, but the self-satisfied gleam in Shepard’s eye made it worth his transparency.

“Coming up on the drop off point, Commander,” Cortez said.

The shuttle set down. Kaidan's insides buzzed with anticipation. It felt like Christmas morning when he was a kid. Shepard opened the door, and a blast of hot, humid air hit him in the face. The snow was melted around a clearing covered in fog. The mist was coming from the ground, from -- Kaidan’s heart stopped -- a hot spring.

“Your eyes are glowing without using biotics,” Shepard said.

She dragged him out of the shuttle by the hand. Once his knees unlocked and blood started again, he was quick to overtake her.

“Have fun.” Cortez strained to see them from the front seat. “Call me when you need me, Commander.”

The shuttle ruffled their hair as it lifted overhead, but Kaidan couldn’t take his eyes off of her.

Shepard played with the latch on his shoulder. "You can't go for a dip in all that armor, Major. You'll sink to the bottom."

“You’re sure that pool’s safe?” Kaidan nodded at the pool half concealed in mist. With the pine canopy crystalized in frost and pink from the sunset glistening in the placid water, it felt like being in a vid. Only better, because it was real and Shepard was part of it.

“Am I sure it’s safe?” Shepard echoed. "I was planning to push you in first. See how it goes.”

“Are we voting on this plan?”

“Nope.”

“Guess I'll just say ‘aye, aye’ then.” Kaidan unclipped his gauntlets.

Shepard made quick work tearing off her own metal plating. Left with only under armor, they tiptoed to the misty water. The hot spring covered more area than Shepard’s entire cabin, and Shepard's cabin was huge. The water's faint blue hue mixed with twilight looked like runoff from a water coloring.

“This is amazing,” Kaidan said.

Shepard squirmed out of her undersuit, one arm at a time, and swung it onto the rocks behind them. Kaidan gave her an admiring appraisal.

“You’re right. Can’t beat the view,” Kaidan said.

“After you.” Shepard waggled her eyebrows.

Kaidan pulled off his underarmor and tiptoed to the edge of the water. Shepard bunched in behind him. The pool looked deep but not enough that either of them couldn’t be standing.

Kaidan lowered his foot slowly toward the water. In the corner of his vision, Shepard raised onto the ball of feet to see. His toe dipped in. He screamed. Shepard slammed him sideways with a strangled cry. She clawed at him trying to see into his face. Their eyes met. She froze.

“Did you -- Ah! Kaidan!” She shoved him back a step.

“Sorry.” Kaidan laughed. “I didn’t actually expect that level of response.”

“You're lucky I didn’t send you spinning with my biotics. Dammit, Kaidan.” She wacked his arm with the back of her hand for good measure. “What kind of reaction were you expecting? I just boiled your foot off in a primordial alien hot spring?”

“Uh.” Kaidan scratched the back of his neck. “I didn’t really think it through. Maybe it’s the vapors.”

“This pool is perfectly safe.” Shepard reassured, seemingly including herself. She pulled him back to the pool. “Liara assured me it's safe.”

“Dr. T’Soni’s certified Hot Spring Seal of Safety? All in.” Kaidan took a wide step to the side and dropped into the pool.

“Wait!” Shepard drew a sharp breath.

The water stung his skin. It was almost painful, but only from the heat. It lapped at his shoulders. The splash left water beading his vision. He blinked it away as his body adjusted to the temperature.

“What’s the matter?” Kaidan brushed wet hair back from his face. “Still a part of you worried it wasn’t safe?”

“No, I just … You put doubt in my head. I wanted to get in first.”

“Gotta make up your mind quicker. Come on in.”

Shepard backed up with a grin and took a running leap. The splash nearly drowned him. Heat washed over him in a wave. He spit water out of his mouth and grubbed his eyes. When she came up, she gasped.

“Holy damn!” Her breathing was labored. “It’s so hot. My blood’s combusting.”

“Mixing two hot things can be explosive.”

Shepard pushed through the water to him. “Yes, let’s mix two hot things.”

Kaidan pulled her arms around his neck. Shepard touched their noses together and laughed.

“This more romantic than the apartment hot tub?”

“If I’m with you, the rest doesn’t matter. This is nice though.”

“You deserve it.” Shepard worked her hands into his soppy hair. “Liara and Garrus made me feel guilty for not sprinkling rose pedals and playing Beethoven in the background. Told them I lit a lemon candle in the cabin once in a while. Liara said it was a poor effort.”

“Why’re you even talking to them about it?”

“I was giving Garrus a hard time. Got the barrel swung around on me.” She gazed around them in the steam. “So, is this more romantic than a lemon candle?”

Kaidan laughed. “How can you hold a candle to this?”

“Clever.” Shepard chuckled and twisted his hair around in her fingers. “What do you think? I just tell Cortez to give our regards. We live in this hot spring forever."

"Forever? I think Liara oversold you on the healing power of this pool."

"You know exactly what I mean. We'll live here permanently like amoebas.”

"I wouldn't mind devolving into a pair of amoebas. It's beautiful here. I wish we had more moments like this. Us, alone, someplace calm and far away.”

Her arms tightened around his neck, and she rested her cheek against the side of his face. Warm breath tickled his ear prickling all the way to his toes.

“Know what I thought when I first saw you?” Shepard whispered.

“What's that guy's name again? Jenkins or something?”

“No. Believe me, I remembered your name. Staff Lieutenant Alenko.” She pulled back to look into his face. “The first time I saw you, I thought: This is the most gorgeous human being I’ve ever seen. Marines shouldn't look like that. The first time we talked, I'll admit, I was secretly hoping for a playboy vibe. You’d cut me off mid sentence to check your teeth and hair in a compact mirror. Or perhaps you’d have a macho marine attitude, the kind that would slap my butt if I was serving cocktails instead of the Alliance. Life would be so much easier if you were just a pretty face.”

“Forgot my compact mirror that day. To know, I was that close to not being a disappointment.”

“You were a big disappointment. Turned out, you were kind, humble, intelligent, surprisingly reflective. Now, you had commendations and Anderson had chosen you, so I knew you’d to be capable in the field. A part of me still held out for a lewd, quip under your breath when I made a decision you didn’t like. But you were all focus. Steely, unshakable competence. You were straightforward, but respectful, and not afraid to speak up. No stuttering or backwheeling when it turned out your opinion differed from mine. I liked you immediately. I thought, dammit, this is going to be the longest tour of my life. Why me?”

Kaidan's cheeks ached from smiling so wide. It was broad enough, it grew Shepard's smile. She pressed a sudden wet kiss to his mouth.

“Do you know what I thought when I first saw you?” he asked.

“Wow, she looks like a hard ass.”

“Well, that too, I guess. I thought you were beautiful, of course, but what struck me was your … presence, I guess, for a better word. You were so confident, not the power-instilled kind. You weren’t arrogant, just self-assured. It was like you knew you could out-maneuver any obstacle. You were tactical, quick on your feet, unstoppable. Even being a biotic, you didn’t act like it was anything to be judged by. And as a leader, you were encouraging, open to ideas, charismatic. You inspired and galvanized the whole team into one piece.”

“Ah.” Shepard pursed her lips. "So you were mesmerized by the great leader, Commander Shepard. The posters and vids did me justice?”

“It was more than that.” Kaidan smoothed a hand down the back of her head. “I mean, that was my first impression, but it only grew. All of that made you a good CO, but you were more. To me. My other COs talked to me, of course. They always wanted to know about the L2, gauge what I brought against the liability, I guess. We’d discuss staffing, missions, swap stories from past postings. Sometimes something surfacey, like hometowns, family members, that sort of thing. I never had anyone, especially a CO, ask anything deeper. Not without an agenda anyway.

“I knew about Mindoir, Akuze. The whole galaxy did. In a way, I felt guilty knowing so many personal things about you without you telling me. And when I thought of what you went through, losing your family at sixteen ...”

Shepard’s eyes had dulled. Kaidan felt a twinge of regret. Perhaps he shouldn’t have said anything about her family.

“Go on.” Shepard cleared her throat. “You can mention it. It’s fine. Facts. The whole galaxy knows, like you said.”

“Yeah, but …” He caressed her cheekbone with his thumb.

“Just go on. Unless that’s where you’re ending. You pitied me.”

“I didn’t pity you. At least, not in the negative way you frame it.”

She gave him a sharp frown. He continued before she could speak.

“Look. I knew a lot about you, and when you asked questions about me, my past didn’t seem so heavy. You cared and listened. Each bit more I gave, you made me feel better about. When I got to the heart of it, Rahana and how it left me, it was the first time I told it that way. It wasn’t just the facts. It was the truth of everything.”

Her eyes had softened. “I knew you were trusting me. I felt closer to you, understood better. You probably know, but I didn’t have a lot of deep friendships like that. You let yourself be honest and vulnerable with me. I cared for you already, but sharing that with me, I knew it was real.”

He pulled her tight to his chest and kissed her. Steam swirled in the air around them. It was indescribable feeling the satin of her skin while the twilight colors of an alien world gleamed in the water. This could be the moment he’d spend the rest of his life wishing he could relive.

“I love you,” he whispered against her ear. “No matter what happens, I’m grateful you’re in my life. The day I met you is the most important day of my life.”

Shepard was quiet for a long time. When she spoke her voice was soft. “Life has never felt right without you, even before I realized there was something missing.”

Kaidan pressed his lips to her temple. “See. You’re romantic.”

“Remember to tell Garrus.”

From “About Mars”: AO3 and FFN

#Mass Effect #Fanfiction #Shenko #femshep x kaidan #Kaidan Alenko #femshep #About Mars #fluff

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anxiouslynumbme · 4 years

Text

Best Prepare To Grieve

7x10, Daisy dealing with Jiaying's death.

Hello! So this is late and slightly more unedited than usual, 'cause I kinda had to post it before tonight's episode, so fair warning and all. Also this is heavily focused on Daisy and May, with a little Daisy/sousa. The higher dosage of Daisy and Sousa will be posted to my other fic (Tell me it's okay.)

Title inspiration: Hayley Williams - Leave It Alone. If you don't know it, go check it out. Actually, listen to her entire album. It's such a wonderful piece of art. Also the song ‘Simmer’ works for both Jiaying and Daisy. But especially Jiaying: If my child needed protection From a fucker like that man I'd sooner gut him 'Cause nothing cuts like a mother

Okay, I'm gonna stop now before I start rambling about the genius of Hayley Williams.

Ao3.

If you know love You best prepare to grieve Let it enter your open heart and Then prepare to let it leave

**************************************

Daisy didn't expect it to be easier, but with the number of people she had lost, and the amount of deaths and loss she had experienced; she wanted to believe it wouldn't hurt as much. But it hurt the same. Always.

Daisy had noticed a change in the way she handled tragedy over the years. How she used to deal with sadness as a kid, crying and daydreaming of a better future. As a teenager, she was the typical angsty, cynical soul who hated the world. A rebellious determination hit in her 20s, she found solace in conspiracy theories and exposing the truths.

And then Coulson had found her, and she'd latched onto the opportunity behind the man, desperately trying to find her parents, to know who she was. But Coulson had given her much more than what she had been looking for. And at first, the loneliness and pain had lessened with the team. She was happy. She belonged.

But as much as S.H.I.E.L.D. had given her; it had taken just as much. And it had taught her to deal with afflictions by avoidance, isolation, and a whole lot of anger.

And Daisy wished so much that was the case by seeing her mother's death again, Daisy wished she could sweep it under the rug and carry on. Just put under it there, with the recent death of Enoch. But she couldn't.

Daisy felt like a little kid again. She just wanted to cry and never stop, her heart was squeezing itself so tightly in its cage, her ears ringing with its heavy pounding. She couldn't breathe.

Daisy's breathing was short and shallow, her heart rate dimming in the engulfing anguish and shock, her chest constricting with the unbearable weight of loss. Daisy was frigid with the retching grief swirling through her veins. How was it that she never knew her mother and it hurt as though she did. Everytime. She had always been an orphan; she never had a mother, this should've been easier. Daisy wanted it to be. Desperately. Daisy was deprived of a mother's love since she was born; she was used to this. And yet, if felt like she was being drained of her blood by Nathaniel all over again. He should've had finished the job.

What Daisy resented the most was the brief, naive sliver of hope that was momentarily lit within her heart. A hope she had learned time and time again to crush, to never let it simmer too long or too bright. Daisy had learned not to hope a long time ago.

But seeing her mother again had weakened her resolve; it melted that icy wall she'd built around her for so long. Because the Jiaying that had stood in front of her was so unlike the traumatic memories Daisy had tried to block out. And for a split second, Daisy let her mind wander: it wandered so stupidly, with an innocence she shouldn't have, gullibility that should had been long gone.

Jiaying's presence enfeebled her state of mind and her guarded heart. Because after all those years, Daisy still hoped. What if Jiaying could stay? What if bad luck decided to let her have this one? What if she could get to keep this untainted and healthy version of her mother? What if they saved her sister and managed to find some way to stay together? It was so brief, a nano-second of hopeful naivety.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. And now you're breaking down all over again.

No, she wasn't breaking down again. Because as much as pain and sadness were familiar. Anger was too. And Daisy could easily channel this darkness that was threatening to swallow her, into fury. A familiar and safe territory.

It had been a while since Daisy had felt this kind of rage. She hated it. It was so easy to lose herself in that bottomless pit of hatred and self-pity. Daisy didn't want to give herself in it again; she'd almost lost the people she loved the last time she had went down an emotional spiral.

But it didn't matter, because Daisy wasn't going to let this go, her blood was boiling beneath the surface of her skin, her nerves prickled and itched with the fury that kept building up by each passing second. Quake was unraveling inside her, her powers thrumming with the need to be let out, it hummed and hammered, silently begging to be unleashed.

"Daisy."

May's wary voice traveled to her ears, but refused to reach the rest of her senses. A numbness began to settle over her as she quietly wiped away her muted tears.

May placed a hand on her shoulder and Daisy's eyes closed at the contact. Daisy couldn't handle comfort right now.

"Where is he?" her voice came out distant and cold.

"Daisy."

"How did he escape, May?"

"Garrett, I'm sure. He has Simmons."

Daisy's heart lurched in silent panic. Of course. Of course, he has her best friend. Daisy pulled away from May, standing up briskly.

“Deke is there too. He was already on the Zephyr.”

"Do you have any idea why he wants Simmons?"

"Daisy, you should take a breath," May said, putting a hand on her own chest.

"I'm fine, we have to act quickly and find her. Malick is unhinged; we don't know what he'll do," Daisy said monotonously, vaguely pointing at Jiaying's corpse. "We should move her first."

"I got it."

Sousa's voice was jarring, to say the least. Daisy was unaware of his presence in the hallway, and she didn't why, but she couldn't look at him.

"Thanks," she told him, marching forward and leaving Jiaying behind, not really caring where her legs were taking her.

"Daisy, where are you going?" May's word fell on deaf ears, Daisy needed to get out, it felt as though her lungs were collapsing in her chest.

Daisy almost sprinted outside. Her steps carrying her forward until she was stood in front of the water falling down harshly at the center of the Lighthouse. A scenery that used to bring her comfort; it was a place she sought out in her time of need, need of serenity and quiet. But her safe haven didn't provide much safety or peace, nothing could change the scene playing over and over in her mind.

Jiaying's face, the cracking sound of her neck breaking. The thudding finality of her lifeless body hitting the floor.

The air started to crackle around Daisy, her powers causing shudders to glide through her bones. Daisy was aware of the ground shaking beneath her, cargo and boxes of contents unknown to her, started to jolt and oscillate uncontrollably.

"Daisy!" It seemed May had followed her.

"Don't worry, May. I'm in control."

"Are you?"

"Yes!"

With a deep breath, Daisy focused all of her energy on one specific container, finally letting the infuriated vibrations out. Releasing her powers directly towards a few useless objects. One after the other, they exploded, and with each one Daisy felt her raging insides slightly subdue. But it wasn't enough. It wasn't Nathaniel.

"Daisy, talk to me." May came to stand next to her.

Daisy breathed in sharply. "What's the plan? Do we know - "

"Daisy, stop avoiding this."

"I'm not avoiding anything, May. Simmons was kidnapped, again! And I'm guessing Malick is not taking her to Hawaii, so..."

"I know that," May gritted out.

"Good. So he probably took her because it has something to do with Fitz, which is just great because we have zero informa -"

"Daisy, I can feel it!" May's voice almost came out in a yell.

"I'm sorry?" Daisy asked uselessly.

"Daisy," May said. "You are in pain. And you are so angry. Please talk to me."

Daisy nodded her head in annoyance, her hands darting to her waist. "Okay, then, why didn't you shoot to kill, May?"

"What?"

"Why didn't you kill him?" Daisy snapped. "Why didn't you let me - ?"

"Your anger was too much, you would've put everyone in danger!"

"No, I wouldn't have! I know exactly what I'm doing."

May paused, taking a step closer to her. "Daisy - "

"What, you wanna talk about something else? Like the fact that apparently I don’t exist now, or the fact that I had to watch my mother die again. Killed by the hands of someone who was abusing my powers! He used my powers to kill her, May!"

"I know," May said softly, striding even closer to Daisy. The consoling noise of the water around them grounding Daisy.

"Honestly, what Did I expect?" she snickered. "She dies later anyway. . .might as well, right? At least now I won't be alive, I guess - I honestly don't how this works anymore."

"Daisy, don't do this. Don't shut down."

"Wow, that's rich coming from you," Daisy bit out, her frustration flowing freely.

May was quiet, which irritated Daisy even more. She simply stood there, staring at her, but not with pity. It was pain. May was hurting too.

Daisy rolled her eyes. "Right, your ambiguous powers are making you extra sensitive, huh? Sorry about that."

"I don't need powers to feel your pain, Daisy."

Daisy stiffened, her feet instinctively taking a step back. "Well, sorry about that too."

"Daisy," May followed her, a palm trying to reach for her arm again. Daisy let her. "I can tell. Always. And that's why I know you will be okay."

"Will I?" Daisy wondered, her tone small and broken. "you know sometimes, I have these moments where I look around, surrounded by you guys, and I feel safe. Content. But then this dread always hits, hard. And I'm just. . .constantly afraid of losing you. Death just follows me, wherever I go."

May blenched, her frown deepening as her hand squeezed Daisy almost sternly. "Don't. Don't say that."

"No, no, it's always been like this," Daisy continued loudly, her hands flailing in front of her restlessly. "it's the same thing, always. Anyone I ever dared to care about goes away. God, even the idea of my parents I couldn't have. Just the mere damn idea of them. And the universe is twisted enough to keep dangling her, dangling that hope in my face!

"I've imagined meeting my mother over and over again, and not once did I - " Daisy's voice broke off, a hollowing ache in her chest. "She's unreachable. There is no world where I could have her. I don't even know why I keep - why I even thought - "

Daisy was cut off by May's arms enveloping her. Her grip strong and kind and steady. Safe, so safe. Daisy gasped roughly, her body sagging against May, finally inhaling oxygen just a bit easier again.

Daisy's legs gave out from under her, May immediately lowering both of them to the ground. May's arms closed her in, almost caging her from the cruel world around her. Like a mother would. And suddenly Daisy was assaulted by the memory of almost losing the woman who was currently keeping her from completely shutting down . May had almost died; Daisy had believed she died. And all of a sudden, that same wave of stifling pain crashed over her again, and Daisy clutched May to her, gripping her tightly.

"You almost died too," Daisy wept, not fully aware that her mouth was freely voicing her turmoil. "You almost me left me, too."

"Shh, I'm right here."

But Daisy was unable to hear anything but her racing, terrified thoughts.

"It won't stop. Ever since Trip, I keep losing. I lost the one person who understood me," Daisy's breath caught in her throat as she thought of her first, lost love. "I lost my - "

Her father? Because he was. In every way but blood, Phil Coulson was her father. And he was gone. And Daisy knew she might never completely move past his death; she might never be whole again. There really was nothing without him.

"It's okay, Daisy."

"He's gone, May. Coulson is gone," Daisy sobbed. "It's not him. He will never be him."

"I know, Daisy, I know." May held her harder. Solid against her.

"Please don't leave, May," Daisy grasped May's waist, her head pressing further in her chest. "Don't leave me."

"I'm not going anywhere," May rasped, her words firm and full of conviction. "I'm right here, okay? I'm always with you, Daisy."

But she wouldn't be. There was no way to ever ensure that, to ensure her loved ones’ safety, her family's survival. Daisy was going to lose them, or they were going to lose her. Death was inevitable, loss was too, and it didn't help that the odds were always stacked against them.

Enoch was right.

But Daisy didn't say anything, and decided to let May's words seep into her anyway, because Daisy was on the verge of a panic attack and she couldn't afford the loss of control right now. So for this moment, Daisy decided to believe May.

******

Daisy's eyes snapped open, her groggy mind trying to comprehend her surroundings. She had fallen asleep, slowly Daisy lifted her head up and away from May's chest to look into her wide awake eyes. Glancing around, Daisy realized May had moved them to a wall near by.

"How the hell did I fall asleep?" her voice was scratchy and low. "Did I, like, pass out or something?"

May grinned. "Honestly, I think you might have."

"Oh, how long?"

"Not long enough."

Daisy exhaled slowly. "Well, I'm sorry."

"It's all right. You needed it."

Daisy gazed at May's warm smile and noticed her eyes were a little red, realizing that May might've been crying with her. Gratitude and affection rushed through her. They had often joked about it, how Coulson and May were like her parents, but deep down, Daisy had always been speaking from the heart. They were.

Daisy caught May's hand in hers, "Thank you. I don't say it enough,"

May's brows knitted. "For what?"

"For taking care of me, for showing me how to survive and basically teaching me everything I know. For saving my life."

"You never need to thank me for any of that.”

S.H.I.E.L.D. did take a lot of from her. But it had also gifted her with something so rare, so utterly precious. Irreplaceable. It was tangible and real and hers. Daisy would take all the pain in the world if it meant having them. Having this family, keeping it.

"Er, hey."

This time, his voice wasn't as jarring, in fact, somehow Daisy was waiting for it, her ears welcoming its irresistible warmth as her eyes finally met his.

"Hi."

"We should start working out a plan and figuring out exactly where they are," May said, her body suddenly rising up to its full height, Daisy following right after. "I'll see you back inside in a few minutes,."

With one last gentle smile, May was walking away from them.

"Are you okay, sounds very pointless right now. So I'm gonna ask if there's anything you need from me."

Daisy's lips instantly quirked to the side. "Not right now, no. But thanks."

She wanted to ask him how he moved Jiaying, where exactly did he put her. Daisy wanted to see her, but her heart seemed to whimper in fear at the thought. Would she be able to do it? Daisy needed to focus on the mission, and maybe later, if she actually survived, there would be time to say proper goodbye to her mother.

"For now, all we need to focus on is getting Simmons and Deke back," she told him as they both started walking back.

Sousa sighed, eyes flitting away from hers. "I know. It all happened so fast. I couldn't stop him."

"You were with her?"

"Yeah, and I didn't have time t - "

Daisy stopped in her tracks. "Hey, it wasn't your fault. There was nothing you could've done."

Even though Sousa knew she was right, she could still sense some lingering guilt in his eyes. But Daisy could more than understand why he felt that way. Because how many times could she have killed Nathaniel? How many ways? Instead, she did nothing but watch. Helpless to stop any of it.

"What happened wasn't your fault either," Sousa said softly.

A part of Daisy didn't like the fact that he seemed to be able to read her so easily after knowing her for such little time. But the other, much bigger part of her, was just so grateful for him. Grateful that she didn't have to talk much for him to understand. So grateful that he was here.

Yeah, we'll see how long that lasts.

Daisy peered at Sousa."Well, I guess it doesn't matter if it is or not. Guilt sticks with you anyway it can."

Sousa nodded. "Sometimes, it can be an irrational feeling."

"But in this case, it's justified. He didn't even want Jiaying. If she hadn't been here at all, then she would've - "

"No, you can't think like that," Sousa interjected quickly. "it'll drive you crazy. There was no way for you to know that. It was out of your control, Daisy."

Daisy could feel her insides recoil at the incessant image that wouldn't leave her mind. "He'd told her. Before he killed her. She - she knew who I was. She was trying to protect me."

Sousa stepped up to her, his palm kindly touching her arm. And Daisy didn't flinch away from him.

"She had died honorably. I know things were bad in the future with her. But this was your mother, Daisy. And she had done what she was always supposed to do."

The silent tears slipped before she could stop them, Sousa's hand rubbing her arm soothingly.

"You know, I'm really glad you kinda pushed me into talking with her."

Sousa smiled warmly. "Really? 'Cause it didn't look like it."

Daisy snorted. "Well, I wasn't at the time. But now I realize I needed the push. . . So thank you."

"Anytime, Daisy."

The way he'd said it, as if he were cementing the idea that he was going to be there for her, anytime. And Daisy wanted to believe him so badly. But she couldn't let herself hope right now, not so soon after. Everything got taken away from her, and Sousa was no exception. Sooner or later.

Daisy sent him a simple nod in response, their legs moving forward again. Daisy didn't want to go inside; the air was probably still thick and heavy with the recent calamity, the devastation. Devastation she was still feeling.

But Daisy didn't have the luxury of mourning right now. Her friends were in trouble, which of course meant the world was in trouble. She needed to push through, as always.

She could let herself think that seeing her mother again brought her nothing but this suffocating sorrow. But Daisy was choosing to view it differently. She was glad that she was lucky enough to have seen Jiaying like this. To hear her say, my daughter, one last time. Daisy was glad she had the chance to look at her mother's beautiful face, and not see years of torment and hate clouding her eyes. Daisy was never even supposed to see her again; she was lucky in that sense.

Or at least that was how Daisy needed to look at it, in order to be able to move on. Because thinking of it any other way could so easily crush her.

Daisy got to see her again and that was enough. Because maybe asking for anything else was too much.

It always was.

#prepare to let it leave #agents of shield #daisy johnson #melinda may #sousy #daisysous #daniel sousa #may and daisy #dousy #agents of s.h.i.e.l.d.#aos

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evilrubberducke · 4 years

Text

IzuMina week Day 1- To Save an Emerald

Yeah, I’m a day late on this one. I blame the pandemic. On the plus side, this means you’re getting a double update from me today.

This is based on the day 1 prompt “Protection”

On a side note, I now have an actual EvilMuffinLord blog here on Tumblr. If you follow me for Mina content, you might want to switch your follow over to there. I’ll keep posting Mina stuff on this blog for the rest of IzuMina week, but after that I’ll switch over to the new one, and leave this for other fandoms/personal blogging.

Read it on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23298604

Or on FF.net: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13530836/1/IzuMina-Week-2020

Mina stood in the center of her dorm room, decked out in her pajamas with her phone in hand, contemplating making the worst decision of her life. The number was already punched in, staring back at her from the screen as if to taunt her into going through with it. All she had to do was make the call.

She honestly couldn’t believe the circumstances that had brought her to this point. They were so outlandish that if she had read them in a book, she would have dismissed it immediately for being too unrealistic.

Just a few short months ago she had rocked up to UA, flushed with victory from completing the entrance exam. She’d done an absolutely awesome job, placing just high enough to land her in class 1A. The experience had been absolutely hellish, and she had spent the week afterward hoping against hope that her performance had been enough to sneak by.

Being able to parade her acceptance letter around had been entirely worth it though. No one could believe what an excellent job she had done in getting in, and she’d been insufferable in her victory for nearly a week afterwards. Her father and brother had deserved it too, the doubters.

Then her first actual day at UA had arrived, and hit Mina like a ton of bricks. It was an experience unlike any she had been through before. She had looked up photos and videos of the school beforehand, but it was so much different to actually stand on its grounds and look up at the towering main building. Sure, she’d seen it during the entrance exam, but she’d been far too preoccupied at the time to really take in the spectacle. Now she had the time to really be wowed, and she was taking full advantage.

The grounds were absolutely immaculate, the shrubbery perfectly trimmed and not a trace of trash to be seen anywhere. That was probably a side benefit of UA having a budget the size of a small prefecture. They could throw around money for a bit of spectacle.

That same spectacle had led to her meeting Izuku just before class had begun. She’d been in the midst of checking out a collage of famous UA alumni battling equally notorious villains, searching for anyone she knew, when he had crashed into her and sent them both sprawling.

Izuku had, predictably, apologized profusely for his mistake and offered to do anything to make it up to her. Mina had tried to brush it off as a simple mistake, but he had been so insistent that she had eventually agreed to let him buy her a drink. If he hadn’t been so awkward and oblivious about the whole affair, she might have thought he had engineered the whole encounter in order to hit on her.

To her surprise, she’d actually enjoyed talking to him while they sipped on their drinks. Once he had gotten over his initial awkwardness, he’d proven to be incredibly enthusiastic about getting into UA and training to be a hero. Mina had been delighted to learn that he was in the same class as her, giving her a head start on getting to know the students she’d be training with. He’d practically keeled over when she had offered to be his friend and exchange numbers, which had actually made her giggle a little bit. He reminded her of a puppy, so eager to please that he was tripping over himself as he did so.

The rest of the day hadn’t gone quite so well. Aizawa was exactly the kind of hardass that Mina hated, lording his power over the class for shits and giggles. She’d placed high enough that she didn’t have to worry about getting eliminated, but watching him berate the lower scoring students had really ground her gears.

Especially when it came to Izuku. It was obvious to everyone that he was trying his best, but Aizawa seemed to have latched onto him in particular as a target. It was hard for Mina to keep up a smile as she watched him spiral lower and lower throughout the day.

Thankfully, he’d managed to stick it out in the end, and Aizawa had proved himself to be a hypocritical ass, calling himself a hero while lying and berating his students. Mina had to admit, seeing Izuku standing there with a broken finger while he smiled at Aizawa, flushed with victory had been awesome. She’d even cheered a bit, though not so loudly that she stood out from the crowd.

That moment of happiness for the boy, and the subsequent relief that he was staying in the class had stayed with her for the rest of the day, refusing to leave her alone. It was unlike her to get so attached so quickly to a person. Sure, she’d had friends in the past, and she had her family, but those relationships hadn’t felt quite like this. Maybe it was because Midoriya was so open and honest that she couldn’t imagine him having an ulterior motive in the slightest, and that made it all the easier to connect.

She’d made a few more friends in their class after that, commiserating with the rest of the girls over having to deal with Mineta’s perverse actions and cracking jokes with Kaminari, but none of them had come as easily as the first.

And then the day of the USJ incident had come, and Mina had been tested. She couldn’t hear what had been said in the main plaza, but she had been able to watch as Izuku came close to death at the hands of the Nomu, only to be saved at the last moment by All Might. As she watched the blond hero smash his way through the miscellaneous villains in an instant, Mina had noticed something. Before All Might’s arrival, she had taken a single step forward, towards the plaza. That had shocked her on a level she couldn’t even begin to describe. Her urge to protect the precious green boy had been so overwhelming that she had been willing to confront the League over it.

She couldn’t reconcile it. She’d never been like this before. She’d met plenty of sweet, friendly people over the years, and none of them had made her feel so fiercely protective, so possessive.

Try as she might to quiet them, Mina’s feelings had only grown stronger as time had gone on. She’d rooted for him in the sports festival, actually biting her nails during his battle with Todoroki, and when he had been injured during the attack on Hosu, she had rushed to his hospital room to check on him.

It had earned her some funny looks, but being able to see that he was safe had been an incredible weight off of her chest. Sure, he was laid up in a hospital bed, covered with bandages, but injuries could always be fixed. His life, on the other hand, couldn’t be repaired.

It was then, staring at Izuku in his hospital bed, costume torn to shreds and stained with blood, that Mina knew this went beyond a simple friendship, or even just protective instincts. She cared for him, in a way that she hadn’t realized she was capable of. And she was going to protect him, no matter what it took.

She’d pitched it as a mutual exchange. He would help her study for the end of term exams, and in exchange she would help him expand his fighting style with some more varied moves. A friendly exchange. He leapt at the chance to be a better hero, and to get to know her better.

She’d been so caught up in celebrating the success of her own clever idea that she completely missed the blush that dusted his cheeks as he said the last part.

The two months before their final exams flew by faster than she would have thought possible. But then maybe that was because she had something to look forward to after school now, instead of just lessons and training. She had someone she cared about, someone she trusted, someone she could talk to about all the things she had never dared speak, not even to herself.

She’d told him about feeling helpless and frustrated about the world around her, the way the bullies always seemed to win no matter if their victims stood up for themselves or not. She told him about trying to stand up to the bullies herself, only to be punished by the teachers for being a disruption. She even told him about her desire to change things, to make a better system where no child would have to suffer for being born weak.

Maybe she had wanted to share all of that, to let the poison she had been carrying for so long out, or maybe she just wanted to ease her sense of guilt for Izuku’s injuries.

In exchange, he had told her about his childhood, about being one of the children crushed by the system. About watching his tormentor be praised for his skill and strength while Izuku was relegated to the class laughing stock. He told her about being labeled as Quirkless, since his Quirk had taken so long to come in.

Mina noticed that he still slipped up sometimes and called himself Quirkless when he wasn’t paying close attention to his words, a fact that ripped at her heart. She couldn’t imagine being labeled like that for so long, or how he still had the strength to stand up after it all, to keep going, to keep having faith in the heroes who by all rights had failed him.

She knew he didn’t tell her everything, but she couldn’t really blame him either. After all, she had her own secrets, though they were getting harder to keep by the day.

She hadn’t bothered to hide her cheers during the final exams. Why should she? The entire class knew that they were friends at this point, though Hagakure liked to tease Mina about how much time she spent with Izuku. She didn’t think her cheers actually did anything, considering the viewing room was at least a mile from the testing site, but it still felt right to her. And in the end, Izuku had come out victorious, despite Bakugou doing his best to bring them both down.

And then Mina didn’t have any more time. Summer break was upon them, and their forthcoming training camp as well. She wasn’t supposed to go along, she was supposed to remain at UA taking makeup exams with the rest of the ‘dunce squad’. But Aizawa had pulled another of his ‘logical ruses’ and taken them all by surprise.

For Mina, however, it was more than a surprise. It was a source of worry that gnawed at her throughout the next day and into the weekend as their class prepared for the trip with a visit to the shopping mall. A visit that turned into an incident when Tomura turned up to threaten Izuku.

Mina had been paralyzed when she saw the hooded figure standing next to Izuku, hand around her friend’s (could she even still call him a friend?) throat. Her instincts had warred with her logical mind, fighting for dominance.

And yet again, her heart had won out. She had taken a single step towards ruin before she had even realized what she was doing. There hadn’t been an opportunity for a second step, though, before Tomura had walked away, leaving Izuku shaken but unharmed.

She had thought long and hard about what that step had meant that night. What it meant for her, what it meant for Izuku, for her class, for her teachers, for her family, for her future. And she had come to one, inescapable conclusion.

She wanted to stay at UA, to grow stronger along with the people who had become her friends. She wanted to make the world a better place, not by tearing down the system but by exemplifying what a hero should be. She wanted to stand in the light with everyone she cared about.

And she wanted to be able to tell Izuku about the feelings that she could no longer deny.

So Mina lifted her phone to her ear, and pressed the button that would forever change her world.

“This is Principal Nedzu,” a crisp voice answered after only a single ring, “To what do I owe the pleasure of this late night call, Miss Ashido?”

She looked to the photo that sat on her desk, slightly askew in its frame from when she had taken it out to stare at it earlier that evening. She and Izuku were smiling broadly, arms around each other’s shoulders as they celebrated Izuku perfecting his Full Cowling for battle. It was a reminder of how far they had come, and how far they still had left to go.

The League was a threat to him for as long as they existed, and Mina could no longer accept that. She had to take a stand, and do what she knew was right. For her classmates, for herself, and for Izuku.

“Because my birth name was Ashido. But for years, my name has been Mina Shiguraki, and I am a spy for the League of Villains.”

#izumina #midoriya izuku #mina ashido #izumina week 2020 #day one #protection #dekumina #minadeku

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