#sometimes i try to think about my future and it's like
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RELATIONSHIP: What do men think about you? How do they see you? (general)
This reading is about men, people who identify as men and/or people who have a strong masculine energy, and their perception of you. It's meant to be about men as a group, but you can try asking about your person, though I can't promise you'll get an accurate answer. If you want to ask about a woman, or someone with a strong feminine energy, you can try, but again, I can't promise you'll get an accurate answer. Keep in mind, when we talk about perception, it's bound to be biased in some way, so if you get a negative message, don't let it affect your self-esteem.
I posted the extended version on my Patreon which includes what do men who are ❤️ romantically attracted ❤️ to you think about you 👀📝 There are other 60+ fun and juicy readings on Patreon too so definitely check it out!
Disclaimer: Here | Instagram: Here
Instructions: Focus on the topic and ask yourself the question. Choose a number/picture that you feel the most drawn to or that you can’t stop looking at. Trust your intuition. May the message resonate. Let me know which pile you choose! Feedback is appreciated!
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PILE 1
General: 10 of Pentacles, 6 of Pentacles, 6 of Swords Rx (The Hermit). The Sun, The High Priestess.
They sense a stable and grounded vibe from you; they think that you are the type of person who moves slowly or who takes time to evaluate things before you make your decisions, the type of person who considers future impacts and future gains when you make your decisions, the type of person who cares about being sensible, like, having good personal finance skills, knowing how to take care of your health, etc. Some of them think you come from a wealthy family, upper middle class and above, you are privileged, or you receive material support from your family. For some of you, this could be the wealth or the material comfort that you’ve built on your own, but they assume it’s provided by your family.
Despite the privilege/wealth they think you have, whether it’s coming from your own effort or your family, they think you are also generous with it. You share your abundance with others, you guide and help others when you can, especially by providing practical help or material help. So them seeing you as well-off isn’t really coming from jealousy or envy, it isn’t something they do to look down on you or to treat you like you grew up spoiled; it’s just something they think you have, and they think you use it for good.
Some of them see you as someone who could be a good spouse, whether they are romantically interested in you or not. They could simply think that you’ll make a nice partner for their own son/daughter/etc, for example. They think you’re quite reserved and conservative. What I mean by conservative here is not necessarily you believing in traditional beliefs, it’s just that, you give off the vibe of someone who doesn’t really party a lot, you are kind but you aren’t exactly a social butterfly, perhaps you prefer to stay at home and cook or read or do activities that are pretty lowkey or that make you feel calm and stable. That vibe. You come across as committed and responsible to them, hence a good spouse material.
But they also think that you secretly have some wounds or sources of stress that you haven’t moved on from, and they wonder if these wounds are the things that make you feel a little distant sometimes, like, you don’t properly open up. Some of you lowkey give off a sombre vibe, despite outwardly showing that you are happy or you are enjoying your time and interactions with people, so they pick up on it.
You ‘make’ them feel at ease with themselves, they feel like they can be who they truly are around you and perhaps they also feel like you bring out their good sides, you ‘make’ them feel inspired or encouraged to be truthfully and authentically themselves. For some of them, your responsible vibe brings out their inner child, so they usually get the desire to express themselves more around you, without shame, without insecurities. Some of them may be more playful too as a result, it depends on their age, but they could ‘poke’ you playfully so you come out of your restraint, especially if you have a serious demeanour. They also feel open towards you, they feel inclined to receive you with open arms. You evoke curiosity too, hence why some of them may poke you playfully just so they can see more of you. Some of them are drawn to you in a way that they can’t explain, though this is probably because you bring out their inner child.
EXTENDED VERSION IS ON PATREON! What do men who are romantically interested in you think about you? How do they see you? Is it the same or is it different? Do they notice the real you? 🫢 Find out here! 👀📝
PILE 2
General: The Empress Rx (Judgement Rx), The Moon Rx (3 of Wands Rx), Temperance. Ace of Swords, 10 of Cups.
They think you are mild-mannered and placid, kinda passive. Perhaps you don’t react much, or perhaps they often see you taking the less confrontational way out. There’s this appropriate, agreeable and peaceful vibe coming from you, like you try to be mature, and patient, and try not to ruffle feathers. They think you often choose to be the bigger person, but some of them disagree with this decision. They think there are situations where you need to be more forceful and push for what you want, but you choose not to. Some of them could think that your peacefulness is actually coming from a lack of maturity (as if you aren’t fully ‘developed/mature’ yet to them, whatever this means) and a lack of self-assurance. Basically they think you haven’t properly come into yourself or stepped into your power.
This is just an example, let’s say you chose not to confront a problematic situation because you were secretly scared or you were insecure about something related to it, but you acted as if you just didn’t want to fight or force things to go your way, you wanted to be mature so you chose to let go of that situation instead. That’s the vibe that they get from you, or that’s the assumption they make about you. You sound wise when you talk and they might think that you are interested in the spiritual or philosophical side of things, but yeah. Remember this is their perception, in reality it could be that you actually speak and act from experience and wisdom.
They think you are secretive about your feelings, not in a good way, they think you suppress a lot of things, especially negative emotions. They think you often choose to show a smooth and kind demeanour to the world instead of the murky, ugly feelings that you truly have. And some of them see this as harmful, because they think you aren’t really dealing with those, or you don’t really address those issues. Honestly if they are right about you, I wonder if you have Enneagram 9, because this sounds like it.
Some of you may not fit the beauty standard, they think you look like you could become more beautiful but you are still in the process of becoming, you’re still in that awkward stage or the stage where you haven’t quite realised your own worth/value/beauty yet. They may not see you as someone to pursue romantically, or to introduce to someone else, because of the lack of self-assurance that they perceive, they think you aren’t properly yourself, like you suppress parts of yourself and you could have insecurities with regard to that, and you don’t seem like you are open to working on those either.
Whether they are romantically interested in you or not, your presence makes them think about your romantic potential, about how you act in a group and around other people. Especially if you are a woman, some men think about the romantic potential of women around them, especially when they are deciding whether they want to stay friends or pursue something more. And they can be critical of your romantic potential, of how you act around people and in a group; it’s like their critical nature comes out more when you are around, their mind starts to turn and they start to sit and think and observe, and notice things that could be problems if you were to become their partner or their friend’s partner, etc. It’s very clinical though, I’m not saying it’s good, but they aren’t actively trying to be mean when they think these things.
Despite that, they think a connection/friendship with you can be very pleasant, not much drama because you aren’t the type for it, and so they are open to including you in their group, they are open to being nice to you and getting along with you. Some of them could see you as someone to protect, despite not having romantic feelings for you.
EXTENDED VERSION IS ON PATREON! What do men who are romantically interested in you think about you? How do they see you? Is it the same or is it different? Do they notice the real you? 🫢 Find out here! 👀📝
PILE 3
General: 5 of Wands Rx (Ace of Swords), The Emperor Rx (Ace of Wands), 6 of Pentacles. 4 of Swords, Page of Swords.
They think you are assertive and confident, but there’s a negative connotation to this. Not super negative to the point that they hate you, no, but it bothers them a little. They think you are outspoken and combative, you fight for what you believe in, you say what you think, you stand strong in yourself, but they think there’s something wrong with this, or they think you need to do it in a certain way, or in a better way, you need to be less this or less that. It’s that kind of feeling. You behave in a way that ruffles their feathers lol.
In reality, it could be that you are actually pretty chill, you know how to balance yourself, when to push and when to wait and receive, you may not be that aggressive or difficult, just healthily assertive and forward (some of you actually come with rough edges, but I don’t think these are bad). Regardless, many of them just don’t receive your masculine traits well, as if those traits challenge their masculinity or beliefs/comfort in some way. Some of them could think that you are a little stuck-up or full of yourself, perhaps they judge this based on your demeanour (or your face, maybe you have a resting bitch face), so when you are just out and about minding your business, getting what you want, to them it looks like you are acting as if you own the place lol.
Some of them could pick up on your more playful side, but perhaps you don’t show it often or openly. It feels like for some of you, they think your playful side is something they need to bring out, and in order to do that, they need to deal with your sharp edges. Despite the edges that they think should be smoothen out, they think you are generous and helpful. You share what you have with people who need it, especially things like skills, expertise, practical knowledge, money and material possessions. When you are in this energy, they think you come across as reliable, secure and responsible. It’s the quality that brings out your calmness and conscientiousness. Some of them think you are good with children, or good with people who need your help since you know how best to support those people. It’s a good quality that they think you have, yet there’s that but.
But they are often triggered by you. Again, not in a super negative way, they don’t actually hate you, not really. It’s just that you make them want to say something to you, to poke you, to challenge you, to get you to talk and respond to them, to argue with you a bit. It’s like you disturb their peace for some odd reason, and they have a lot of opinions about it. They could be slightly mean with their words just to see how you react or just to scratch the itch of their annoyance. They may be randomly or unexplainably confrontational, making sharp comments out of nowhere, or telling you what they think about you unprovoked and in a way that isn’t really kind, as if they have no social skills to handle the situation with tact. You ‘disturb’ their peace, now they want to do the same to you.
Some of them could take a more playful approach; they could intentionally be annoying towards you, tease you, make jokes and start random conversations with you, just to get you to respond to them. You evoke curiosity and desire to know, the way they go after this varies, like I’ve described, it depends on how kind and mature they are. Some of them may not be able to leave you alone without some kind of annoying behaviour or comment. They act like they know who you are, but it’s like, there’s a subconscious part of them that is lowkey open to change, as if they’re waiting to be proven wrong or they are waiting for reasons to change their mind about you. Perhaps they secretly feel like they don’t completely understand you, hence the desire to poke around.
EXTENDED VERSION IS ON PATREON! What do men who are romantically interested in you think about you? How do they see you? Is it the same or is it different? Do they notice the real you? 🫢 Find out here! 👀📝
PILE 4
General: The Sun, 4 of Pentacles Rx (King of Cups, 8 of Pentacles), The Empress. The Hanged Man, The World Rx.
You seem very genuine and positive to them. Your vibe is light and joyful, like a beautiful butterfly, it’s like you shine wherever you go. They think you like to laugh or smile, or you bring a lot of laughter and joy to people. They think you make people feel comfortable, you make your surroundings more beautiful and positive. They think you are full of inspiration and you seek to live your life the way you want, instead of following what’s accepted or what’s well-regarded by the external world. There’s this authenticity about you that is very freeing or liberating, like someone who passionately pursues what brings them joy and lives their best life. There’s a childlike quality to you, maybe you look youthful, or you give off a youthful, sunny vibe. Despite you having the wisdom to know that the world isn’t always good and nice, they think you are the type of person who chooses to see the good in others and the world anyway. Despite your youthful vibe, they don’t see you as naive.
They think you attract attention; some of them think it’s because of your vibe, it’s positive to be around you. Some of them think it’s because of your looks/beauty. Some of them think it’s both. They think you are stereotypically beautiful (i.e. you meet the beauty standard), or you take good care of yourself, like smelling and looking good, which makes you look beautiful. They think you have a good self-esteem, you value yourself, you know your own worth, so you live your life like that, but without arrogance. They think you are loving, generous and kind; to people, to animals and plants. It’s the vibe that they pick up on.
If you are a woman, they could think that you like stereotypically feminine things, like jewellery or the colour pink, cooking or baking, or being a homemaker or a mother. They think you deserve to live a good life, you deserve to have your needs met and some more. They think you aren’t closed off, you are open, you show your vulnerability with grace and integrity, you aren’t ashamed of what makes you human. When you have something you are working on, like a flaw or a weakness, you don’t mind showing it to them. So they can only acknowledge the emotional maturity that comes with that ability, i.e. they think you can do that because you are emotionally secure.
You ‘make’ them feel calm, to be honest, it’s like being around you put them into this introspective mode. They start thinking and pondering life, and feeling open to having their perspectives changed, to shift their understanding, and to look deeper into things. You make them more philosophical, and possibly also spiritual. Maybe through their observation of you, or words that you say; they learn more about the world and themselves, about their previous beliefs and misconceptions and how these can change, about a better way to be, a better approach to take, nuances they haven’t considered. They are also more patient around you, gentler and slower to react. They feel more open and willing to change their ways and adapt to you. Some of them are also more open to giving you what you need, even if it’s not something they normally do.
EXTENDED VERSION IS ON PATREON! What do men who are romantically interested in you think about you? How do they see you? Is it the same or is it different? Do they notice the real you? 🫢 Find out here! 👀📝
#pick a card#pick a pile#tarotblr#tarot readers#tarot community#divination#pick a picture#free tarot readings#pick an image#free tarot#pac#love tarot readings#future spouse tarot#love tarot#future spouse
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YOUR NECKLACE - LN
no warnings just fluff + some SMAU <3 (one mention of sick, no specific detail)
-> lemme know ur thoughts! my inbox is open!! <3
masterlist the playlist
after successfully keeping their relationship secret for 9 months, lando truly believed it was time for him to properly introduce his girlfriend to the world of motorsport. she’d attended races before but always under general admission, usually alone, but sometimes accompanied by the likes of max and p. and it wasn’t as if the fans didn’t know who she was, they just knew her as ‘y/n who works with quadrant’, ‘y/n that reset the cones in the driving video’, ‘y/n that keeps her social media private’ - never once being considered lando’s girlfriend, which worked well for the two.
the panic had set in that morning as she dressed for the day, her hands constantly running over her outfit, checking the way she looked in the mirror from every angle - she wanted to believe that no one would care, or even notice that she was there, but deep down she knew that making the jump from general admission to paddock would gain some chatter on twitter.
“you look perfect,” lando had whispered in her ear from behind her, his hands wrapping around her waist as he tugged her away from the mirror.
“maybe they’ll just think im helping with a quadrant project,” she said absentmindedly, more trying to convince herself than actually respond to him.
“maybe,” he nodded along with her, mulling over his next words, “we can walk in separately if you want? they might not assume anything if they don’t see us together?”
“it’s not that i dont want us to be seen together,” she told him as she moved to the floor, tying her shoelaces up, “i just hate to think what’ll be said about me if they do.”
“i know, angel,” he reassured her, offering out a hand to pull her up, pressing a quick kiss to her forehead when she returned to his level.
the journey to the track was a quiet one, the two of them engaging in light conversation, eventually deciding they’d just walk in together, keep PDA to the minimum and ‘run and hide at the first sign of trouble’ y/n had joked.
lando paced up and down his drivers room, the sleeves of his racing overalls swinging with every step, from where they sat around his hips. he was getting into the right mindset, music playing, and yet his mind raced with every fear of the looming race.
“sit in the garage,” he asked her, halting his pacing to turn and face her.
“what?” she replied, half unsure she’d misheard him.
“watch from the garage - please,” he repeated moving to take steps towards her, noticing the way her fingers twisted at the rings that adorned them.
“are you sure?” she checked, as he grabbed her wrists to stop her anxious fiddling.
“never been more sure in my life,” he told her, using her arms to pull himself closer, joining the two of them in a sweet kiss.
“ok, ill be there,” y/n responded against him, parting only for a moment before connecting their lips again. the kiss was short and sweet, cut off by oscar knocking telling him it was time to go.
she stood in the garage, smiling at a few engineers she recognised before finding herself a seat. the nerves were washing over her again, but now they were for lando. y/n always worried during races, scared on his crashing, worried he wouldn’t perform as well as everyone knew he could. her hand reached up to her chest, instinctively searching for her necklace - lando had bought it for her before they were even together, knowing from the moment she smiled at it and looked up to thank him that this was it for him, she was his future. but the necklace wasn’t there, the girl panicked slightly, fearing she had lost it or it had fallen off before concluding that in her distraction this morning she had simply forgotten to put it on.
that’s ok, you’re a grown woman who can control her nerves. you don’t need a necklace to calm yourself down - you’re not even the one racing she told herself, letting out a deep sigh as she tried to believe herself. no one else in the garage seemed to notice her, a fact she was fairly happy about, hoping that the same would be said for the hundreds of news and tv stations priming their cameras for the race.
but someone had noticed her, recognising the look on her face as the same one she had been wearing all morning. only lando could decipher what her expression meant - she was nervous, of course, scared for him, but also filled with a small buzz of excitement - he couldn’t quite understand how one person could feel so much all at the same time, and not combust on the spot. nevertheless he jogged over to her.
“lando? aren’t you supposed to be like, getting your helmet on?” she asked him, shocked slightly at his sudden appearance. he looked at her, his hand tugging at the top of his fireproofs and pulling his own necklace from where it was trapped behind the fabric.
“forgot to take this off,” he told her, hands moving behind his neck to unclasp the metal, “will you look after it for me?”
she nodded up at him, her outstretched hands halted as he stood close, hands moving the metal around her own neck and clasping it. the metal dropped against her skin, the warmth from him wearing it transferring to her.
“thanks, love you,” he told her, a rushed kiss planted on her lips before he jogged away from her again.
his face carried a smirk as he left her, knowing he hadn’t truly forgotten to take the piece of jewellery off. in actual fact, he’d noticed her missing necklace the moment they’d arrived at the track and made it his mission to have his own hung around her neck, almost as a badge of honour. the two had agreed to keep their relationship private from the public, somewhat of a secret - but now she sat in his garage, wearing his necklace. it was the bare minimum display of the love they shared, but it was enough for him, and it was enough for her.
oscar quirked his eyebrow at his teammates smirk, receiving a quick tell you later before the two pulled their balaclavas down.
the gesture was so simply and so subtle and the girl was oblivious to the moment being caught on camera. the moment a yellow flag was called, the sky tv cameras filled the wait time by zooming in on the faces of loved ones sitting in each drivers garage. however, y/n remained oblivious to the lens focusing closely on her, the camera closely capturing the way she fiddled at the necklace before dropping it as normal lap conditions resumed.
"good day then?" y/n asked him softly, her head resting on his bare chest as she listened to his heart beat - lando felt the way her cool fingers fiddled with the necklace around his neck. that godforsaken necklace, quite frankly the only necklace to ever cause so much uproar online.
"soft launched on live tv and p3? i wouldn't have it any other way," lando replied softly, chucking lightly as his hand brushed through her hair.
“that checks out, mr nowins,” she teased, tilting her head to grin at him.
"being with you is a win in itself," he replied, taking the nickname in his stride.
"gross," the girl responded, pretending to vomit at his attempt at being cute.
“i am sorry though - i should’ve known that would happen, i should’ve checked with you before hanging the “lando’s girlfriend” sign around your neck,” he replied with a sigh, his head dropping to press a kiss to her forehead, his cheek resting on her head as they spoke.
“it’s ok lan, i knew there was a possibility of something like this happening,” she replied.
“and it was fairly subtle - we could probably play it off for a little longer,” lando suggested, knowing that neither of them were quite ready to expose the extent of their relationship just yet. at least this had given them the opportunity to be a little more careless with their efforts to hide from the public. they were private, not secret, and lando couldn’t be happier to preserve this part of his personal life for a little longer.
“im just glad we no longer have the responsibility of a big announcement,” she laughed, “god knows we’re both too lazy for that.”
“who’s we?” he grumbled jokingly, “im the one with the public account. besides, im more than hard launched on your page.”
“ah the joys of an ordinary life,” y/n joked, her arms stretching out in feigned bliss, “however i feel like i should steer clear of twitter for a while.”
“that’s probably for the best,” he agreed, his tone saddening slightly at the memory of things he’d seen posted about not only his ex girlfriend, but some of the claims people had already began making about the girl lying below him.
“hey!” she started noticing his change in mood, and pushing her body weight back to look at him, “none of that. today is a good day. trust me, ill take any excuse to get my screentime down.”
“i love you,” he told her, grabbing at her body to pull her back into his embrace, “more than you could imagine.”
liked by maxfewtrell, team_quadrant and 111,230 others
landonorris soft launching on live tv wasn't enough, time to promote her to the gram
comments on this post have been limited.
maxfewtrell so glad i dont have to worry about slipping up on stream anymore
-> maxfewtrell chat aren't ready for what i have to say.
maxfewtrell 2nd photo is a violationnn - ynpng, pietra.pilao u gonna let this slide?
-> ynpng am i fuck. pietra.pilao we ride at dawn.
-> pietra.pilao omw queen.
-> maxfewtrell run landonorris whilst u still can
-> pietra.pilao you told me you deleted that photo maxfewtrell - sleep with one eye open xx
ynpng hate u with every fibre of my being rn <3
-> landonorris nuh uh
-> ynpng gonna unprivate my acc and let the world see the video of you falling down the stairs
-> landonorris might accidentally leak the video of you and the shoe incident
-> ynpng you wouldn't dare.
-> landonorris you wanna bet?
#lando norris#lando norris x reader#lando norris smut#lando x reader#lando smut#lando norris imagine#lando norris fanfic#formula 1#mclaren f1#mclaren#lando norris fluff#propertyofwicked#maxfewtrell#fewtrell!sister#lando norris smau
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The First Kiss - Feyd Rautha x Reader
summary: You are visiting Giedi Prime once again. As you've grown older, the pull you feel around the na-baron is stronger, deeper, even if you've never spoken on it. Does he dream of you too? Will you be able to speak of them to him, or will such dreams remain as such forever? We he be able to resist you?
disclaimer: this is a kind of follow up fic to my last feyd x reader. However, this takes place before that time frame. Read the first one here to get a better understanding of how i'm approaching my feyd stories.
words: 1,111
This was the fifth time your family's entourage had visited Giedi Prime; your betrothed's home planet. Each stay got a little more familiar. Perhaps it was the smell of the air. The caress of the blinding black sun above; brilliant and strange; a blot in the heavens. You felt enraptured in it somehow. Like a feeling you could not shake, though in part you blamed the dreams.
You had yet to speak of them with him.
Had he dreamt too? Surely, the na-baron had. You thought often that he must, if not only for the way his eyes seemed to linger on you when you shared a space, no matter how many resided in it. You felt wholly consumed by it. There was a heaviness in his actions, weighted by their directness; when his gaze would meet yours, your pulse would quicken, breaths catch in your chest.
Sometimes, even in silence, in those spaces you shared among the others of your families, you found him lingering close. Felt the heat of him at your back. The hand at his side ever so close to caressing the edge of your hip. He was possessive. Protective.
You two had shared such few words, yet you knew this about him already. Nor could you deny the way it made you feel. A magnetism. Something at the edge that was just out of reach. For now.
"My lady." You startle at the closeness of his words, earrings brushing the curve of your neck as you whip swiftly to look up at Feyd.
You had been thinking of him; lost in your own thoughts. He seemed to read it in your gaze, dark eyes flitting between yours, shadows blanketing the angles of his face. There is a palpable silence as his gaze lowers to your lips. That heat you'd come to know with him. Your mouth waters at the ghost of his kisses in your mind. A seemingly distant future in visions of your marriage.
You vaguely catch the Baron's smug rasp to your father something about spice production, but they have trailed out of the room before you catch the full statement; leading a train of servants in their wake, and the hissing of levitation technology.
When you speak it is but a breathy sound.
"My lord na-baron."
"-Feyd." He quips. low and sudden.
You swallow thickly, a flush beneath your cheeks as you meet his eyes. His given name. You hadn't used it yet, save your own thoughts, and whispers to yourself at night in the safety of your room. It seemed a sacred thing. Something intimate. Something of your yet-to-be-husband's.
The na-baron watches you intently; his body imperceptibly closer, as though seeking to envelope you in his shadow. Predator and prey. You decide to broach the subject. The feeling between you...you must know if it is something of your own mind.
"Feyd Rautha". For some reason the use of his full name from your lips makes him smile. A bizarre sight, being so rare - and this grin looked almost amused. Like he had not been expecting the addendum, humorous. You are quick to try and follow up with your request, cheeks hot.
"I must ask something rather delicate, pertaining to our betrothal."
At that he seems to sober a bit, obviously unsure about whatever it was you were to follow with.
"Do you..." You wish you could know a thing beyond just your own feelings. The twisting of your stomach at the thought he could reject you tearing your insides.
"...Do you dream?"
For a moment, there is that heavy silence again, but then you see the slow curl of his lips, just at the edges. Oh, he seems to say. Followed by a soft and knowing hum.
"Is that what this is about?"
He is coming closer now, stalking you in a few calculated steps with that same smile. Your chest heaves with your breaths as you make way backwards, but then he has an arm about your waist, and mentally you are aware of the heat of him, and the strength. You feel like you've lost some game, or been suddenly caught cheating.
That's when you taste him. His mouth has tilted upon yours, slotted against you like you were meant to be there and you moan softly. Surprised that this moment has come at all - yet wanton for it too. How many nights had you dreamed of him holding you like this? Wondering what it might be like for him to lean in and kiss you?
Feyd swallows your sigh greedily. Readily. The arm he has around you pulls you into him further, and you are pleasantly surprised by how soft his lips are, and how good he tastes. His tongue swipes across your bottom lip.
You angle your head opening for him further, learning as you go. He was so quietly calculated, and yet he kissed you like a man starved, uncaring of who saw or who tried to stop him. Not that any being could. You would bet everything that the na-baron would slice any fool willing to try, to shreds. You'd seen his bloodlust, and his prowess in the arena. Such a feat might even excite him, with you as his prize.
He seemed eager to hold back his need for air - kissing as deeply as he could. Slow. Then fast. As though his control would slip and he has to taste more of you. More. More. His tongue sought yours in a dance, followed by teeth tugging at your lips. You mewled softly at that, eyes so heavy. You felt almost drugged, and after a moment too long, you both parted, breaths breaking the silence.
His hands are at your hips now, holding you steady, but your faces were still just a fraction apart. You felt proud of the way Feyd's eyes looked heavy lidded, or how his lips were tinged pink. It drew your eyes in a way that had him groaning.
"Careful, princess..." The nickname has your cheeks heating again, even after being kissed senseless, and he chuckles low in his chest. The smells of spice and some kind of foreign cologne fill your senses as he nears again, this time bringing his mouth towards your ear. You close your eyes, barely able to keep them open as you angle your head slightly to the side.
"-Or I might have to make more of my dreams a reality."
The admittance, and the low tone of his voice so close has you turning your face and opening for him once more, your breaths colliding as he is quick to seek your tongue with his own.
#feyd x reader#feyd rautha x reader#feyd rautha#x reader#fanfic#reader insert#reader#fanfiction#dune fanfic#dune fanfiction#feyd x you#i love the bald man alright#like dang why they make him so kissable though#okay dawg yeah i wanna make out gosh
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Hello Mr. Atoms, I'm an animation student in college and fan of your work. I got this assignment in which I need to ask questions to a professional in the area. Could you pretty please answer them? It'd mean a lot to me.
1- Are you happy with your career? How it's going.
2- What are your opinions, expectations and hopes about the independent animation industry that's developing?
3- What do you think about the advent of artificial intelligence? Do you fear for the future of animators?
4- If money wasn't a problem, would you still do what you do?
5- Any animators you admire and would like to mention?
Okey dokey.
1- Are you happy with your career? How it's going.
Not really, in that there seems to be no career left.
The animation industry swelled its numbers greatly before 2020. Almost immediately after that, corporate greed synergized with a pandemic to reduce animated programs and the number of people working on them to almost zero. It takes almost a year from beginning to end to make a single episode of an animated show (by the modern standard). There was nothing being made in 2020 and four years later, we''re not in a much better spot. It's going to be a long drought for (especially) Kid's TV Animation.
Recently, many of my former co-workers have hit the financial wall and can't continue, moving away after (sometimes) 20 years in the industry. I begin to wonder if I'm very far behind.
A "bounce back" a year from now would need to start today. There are still some animated shows being made now, but those are almost universally "library" properties. That means it's an existing I.P. (Intellectual Properties like Garfield/Mario/Batman/Star Wars) so as an artist you're immediately in that box. Depending on the property and the studio, it can be an unpleasantly tight box. I grew used to holding and maintaining the vision for a show, but it's less fun when it's not my vision. It's even less fun when you can't inspire someone to follow your vision because they've been so ruthlessly abused.
I'm pretty sick of how big media corporations treat their employees. If I inherit one more burnt out crew due to mismanagement, I'm gonna lose it.
Over a decade ago I fought hard to get board artists story credit for the episodes they were actually writing, and felt like I'd won a big victory for everyone. The second my back was turned, it all reverted.
Mostly... what is the point now? My career is/was developing ideas, crafting those ideas into a workable show, then managing teams of thirty to seventy people to produce a couple of dozen episodes per year. Studios actively do not want new ideas right now, and are actively searching for ways to eliminate what artists from the process. I'm not sure what my job would be under this new system, but it feels like they decided to hang onto the anxiety-inducing deadlines while removing anything remotely pleasurable from the experience.
2- What are your opinions, expectations and hopes about the independent animation industry that's developing?
It's the only way to get anything done, currently.
The current state of the industry is not sustainable. I (along with a lot of other animators I know) are trying to decide what's next, and pretty much everyone agrees that "you just have to make something".
It is (in that very specific way) a great time to be a young animator. The system was never going to treat you well anyway. If you can get something like a Hazbin Hotel happening without studio help, you can currently write your own ticket. I'm super proud of Vivsie, because that's a LOT of stuff to handle. I never had to handle my own marketing or drum up money to make Billy & Mandy happen.
There are opportunities there, but it's definitely "Hard Mode". The best idea is probably to team up with a few other people you like and like to work with.
Hopes? I hope that the young animators take over and make something new on top of the bones of the old industry, rather than just allowing that industry to patch its rotting hide with their collected works.
3- What do you think about the advent of artificial intelligence? Do you fear for the future of animators?
I suspect true AI might just peace-out like ScarJo in "Her", but we're not there yet. What we have now isn't Artificial Intelligence at all (though I do believe it may be the underpinnings of the Artificial Suconscious of what may one day become an actual Artificial Intelligence.)
The LLMs and "Generative AI" are (so far) a big dumb waste. They consume tons of energy and aren't great for doing anything creative. If you've sat down with Chat GPT for a creative writing session, you've probably run into the "out of the box" limitations which prevent it from talking about sex or violence-- which happen to be a major component of most stories.
Still, the technology has come incredibly far in an incredibly short amount of time. I imagine we're going to hit the point where we're being hazed by artificially generated political ads way before Generative AI can produce a consistent and usable character turnaround, so that'll be the test. Whatever the legal fallout is from this stuff over the next few years will set the tone.
Still, studios have a vested interest in pleasing their shareholders. Generative AI potentially has the capability of not only replacing swaths of money-eating artists, but handing that control directly to the billionaire studio heads. Mark my words: We're headed straight for billionaire-generated content.
I don't think the public at large will want to watch Elon Musk's fever dreams, so there's that. So law and general distaste might stave it off for a while, but I think there's just too much impetus for studios to continue to try to please their investors. "AI Art" is here to stay.
Eventually that will lead to millions and millions of bots generating millions and millions of songs and paintings and movies all day every day. Most of it will be utter trash. Right now (so I'm told) viewers are already burnt out, and will generally only click on what they already know. On Netflix, where there are twenty things you've never heard of and one you have, you're more likely to pick the thing that gives you comfort and gives you a guarantee you're not wasting your time. With exponentially more A.I. trash, how would you even begin to filter it out?
You'd need absolute control of an already existing distribution system. We currently have a few of those, and all of the media companies are desperately trying to merge with them to insure their own survival.
To me, the post-Gen-AI landscape looks a lot like old-school Cable, but with endless I.P. and fewer masters.
4- If money wasn't a problem, would you still do what you do?
The real question is, maybe, "What am I even doing?" These days I try to do a lot of gardening. I'm trying to learn new art skills, because suddenly twenty five years of experience managing, drawing, and writing isn't worth much. I recently worked on Jellystone until Zaslav lost 2.5 billion in the wash and had to find justification for his new yacht. The show before that? Also culled midway through to save money. The days of multi-year gigs seem to be over, and if I'm going to scrape by doing freelance, maybe I can do that somewhere else.
I'll always make art. I can't seem to help it. Ideas aren't my problem-- it's executing those ideas without the help of a structured pre-existing system. I honestly don't know if I'll ever be able to pull that off. My strengths are great, but were always supported by friends I worked with.
Can I start an indie cartoon with all of these cool friends? Sure, maybe. Most of those people have gone on to have other careers of their own and got used to being paid. Now nobody is getting paid and no one can pay anyone else. My immediate circle are all now middle-aged people with families and no jobs. Convincing them to give up a large chunk of their day for an idea that's not guaranteed to pay off is going to take some real effort.
I technically have fifteen years until I can claim my "retirement", assuming that still exists by then. That's a pretty big hole to fill with... I don't know what.
The difficult "What comes next" discussions at home are really just starting.
5- Any animators you admire and would like to mention?
There are a lot of cool animation people out there. I already mentioned I was proud of Vivsie. I was also reminded recently just how great C.H. Greenblatt and Mr. Warburton are. I know they're my friends. They're both just really upstanding, creative people who take good care of their crews.
The treatment of animation industry professionals by the studio system has been one of the most demoralizing and heartbreaking parts of this demoralizing and heartbreaking time.
---
So there ya go. If you want to look for someone whose attitude is a little more upbeat, I won't blame you a bit.
Wherever you are, I wish you the best of luck. For me, just climb up there and crush it. I would very much like to add you to #5 someday.
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Was Lilia more “Oh my thorn fairy I have another child?! I can barely cast a spell as of now and future me wants a fucking KID?! AT THAT AGE?!”
Or more of a
I HAVE ANOTHER SON?! AND IT’S FROM ME!?
If his Yutu tells him he comes from the future? Because it could imply he does regain his remaining years and magic. Idk how you wrote that problem that even rn it’s giving talk about Lilia surviving book 7 or not.
If it’s the second I already see him passing by Silver’s room really excited and saying “YOU HAVE A BROTHER!” And zooming off, leaving a very confused Silver and thinking he refers to either Malleus or Sebek.
technically anon asked first but this ask is much longer so it was awkward to screenshot for an answer. Here is the link the anon used for reference, I obligated as an elderly hater to let you know it's from SAO. Anon's idea is extremely good and we're going to roll with it for this Yutu's Uniqe Magic because you know he was always going to be a little shit.
notes: they/them used for Yuu, context on the fyuuture kid au can be found here and here. SPOILERS FOR: Book 7, Lilia's back story, and Silver's unique magic. Please engage with this in mind. For more fyuutre kid au, please check out the series section of my masterlist.
I have a bit of difficult time writing for Lilia given how much older he is than the rest of the cast, so I tend to write his Yuu as being a bit older themselves. Maybe they had an extremely difficult childhood and connected with Lilia over their shared sense of robbed innocence. Whatever it was I think this Yuu has a bit of a fascination with creatures of the night and a lot of their weirdo reputation within their community comes from kids telling each other that Yuu and Yutu are vampires. That makes me tempted to say Lilia! Yutu's real name is Alucard or Sebastian, something vaguely vampire themed.
None of those rumors are helped by Yutu finding himself very lethargic when out in the sunlight or his preference for colder temperatures. From his perspective he can't exactly help being who he is, people should really just get over themselves and let him do his thing. It's not his fault that bats really seem to like him for some reason, the neighbors are exaggerating Mr. Animal Control officer he swears.
Because he prefers to spend his awake hours in the dark, he is waaaaay too comfortable doing things and going places he shouldn't. He's real familiar with all the abandoned buildings and sketchy alleys of your town and has tagged quite a few of them. I like the idea of Lilia! Yutu being really interested in street art and Graffiti. I could see him putting up a bunch of bats everywhere and getting in a bunch of trouble for it. He has very fond memories of Yuu letting him paint murals on portions of their house in an effort to meet him halfway. He might like a good prank but unlike his father Yutu is always pulling his punches with Yuu.
Lilia didn't exactly have a supportive parent while he was growing up, something I feel like Yuu remembers and is very conscious of in their parenting of Yutu. Unfortunately for Lilia they also remember that he had another child and was a lot older than them, something Yutu raises several eyebrows at and causes him to ignore the things Yuu tries to tell him about his "great sense of humor" and "desire for different peoples to learn and grow with one another-" yeah that's great can you back up a bit to where you said he had another family? Yutu goes through life thinking he was the product of an affair Yuu had with a much older, married man who was just trying to feel young again. The amnesia stuff... sometimes he wonders if his dad tried to have Yuu killed. He never says it out loud because something tells him he's wrong, but gut feelings aren't as trustworthy as statistics...
So you can imagine his surprise when he tumbles out of a coffin and is told that his dad was a faerie general bound in service to a family of dragons, veteran of an ancient war, and technically the adoptive father of the Prince of the children of the night and the Prince of the rival human kingdom that killed his best friends. One of which is alive and overwhelmed with joy to meet him. Silver wanted Yutu almost as badly as Lilia and Yuu did so to see him alive and awkwardly squirming in his arms? Silver hasn't cried this much since they lost Lilia and Malleus.
Having a proper older brother, not just the concept, is an extreme change for Yutu. He's used to it just being him and Yuu, and he was sort of expecting Silver to hate him just for existing. Nothing could be further from the truth, Silver wants his younger brother to have the same freedoms he did while attending school but he also respectfully requests that Yutu spend at least some of his free time with him. He tried desperately to find his dreams over the years and was never able to make firm contact, but he doesn't want to pressure Yutu into caring about him. Yutu is didn't realize how badly he wanted other family members until he got to have Silver, he's even willing to take up sword fighting so they can get closer.
Sebek is also overwhelmed with tears upon seeing Lilia! Yutu. He is a bit harsh on him for "not living up to Master Lilia's legacy" because he doesn't know anything about fighting. He does applaud him for his willingness to learn. Yutu thinks Sebek is hilarious and messes with him just as much as Lilia does. Something Sebek is completely willing to let him do because it makes him feel like Lilia never left.
All of the Yutus get to see some of the photographs Yuu left behind, but Lilia! Yutu is especially interested in them. He makes a small photo album of all the ones he can find of his dad, especially ones where he's with Yuu and Silver. He's partially driven by guilt for thinking his father was a terrible person, but really he just wants to feel closer to him. He's half fae, and sure he has Sebek to talk about that with but what he really needs is a connection with his father. Yutu doesn't really care about being a faerie. He just cares about his dad's acceptance, everything else can go hang.
I don't have a name for his unique magic, but going off of anon's idea it allows him to overwhelm his target's mind, forcing them to think about their greatest fears to the point they are convinced they are really going through it. Someone hates spider? All over their face and in their clothes. Crippling fear of failure? Suddenly that emotion is all they can focus on. And if it's a mindless creature like a blot phantom or a monster they become overwhelmed with the sensation that they are unable to breathe and about to die. Yutu can't control the illusion the person experiences so usually he tries not to use it on his classmates.
That changes when he goes into the past. Some rando want to shit talk Yuu? Nightmare. Macho NRC guy wants to rumble? Nightmare. Some random guy jumped out from behind him and yells "BOO!" Nightma-
If Yutu had been just a hair slower he would have been in extreme pain, the dangerous glint in those familiar ruby eyes scream that. The short fae smiles almost cruelly, advancing on him clearly upset even though Yutu has dropped the spell.
"Well now, that's no way to great a senior." Lilia's voice is strangely soothing, it occurs to Yutu that this is probably the first time his father has ever been angry at him and he can't help himself. He laughs,
"Yeah sorry about that." He makes sure to try and be cute about it, which helps to diffuse the tension some what. "You really scared me so it was all I could think to do."
Lilia is very impressed by Yutu's reflexes and control over his unique magic. He is even further impressed by how eager Yutu is to train with Silver. The kid has some real promise and fits into Silver and Sebek's dynamic better than Lilia could have dreamed of. He really hopes the two will benefit from having a relatively normal human friend their age to train with. Maybe he and Yuu will stick around and give him some piece of mind about the kids being in good hands when he's gone.
Yutu hanging around Diasomnia gives him an excuse to chat with Yuu more, not that he exactly needed it. Lilia sort of hates the way he's drawn to you, it feels unfair. Unfair to you to give you hope there could be something more and toy with your affections; unfair to him for life to finally allow him to realize what romantic love is like just in time to have to let it go. There is a bittersweet tone to all of your interactions that his housemates are a bit too socially awkward to pick up on but Cater does.
Yutu is surprised how much he likes Cater, he associates him with a terrifying monster he's had to fight multiple times, not a fun guy who is really determined to help his parents get together. And what's even better he's really chill when Yutu asks for stories about Lilia, he has a lot of them and a completely different perspective than his older brother allowing Yutu to glean some more insight to what his parents might have been thinking in the future.
He finds himself spending a lot of time with the pop music club, not as an official member though he's not great at carrying a tune. Kalim, Cater, and Lilia are glad to have another person to chill with, sometimes they'll play music and Yutu will draw something based off whatever noise they made. Cater wants to talk him into doing album art for them... you know if they ever get around to making a recording.
I think Yutu will only tell Lilia who he is if he has no choice. He wants to mess with the timeline as little as possible, but should a monster from his timeline appear in this one, say like an overblotted Yuu another asker was so nice as to bring up, well it's not like he says who he is. He just addresses the monster as his parent and has a very loud meltdown not wanting to fight them again. Something Malleus is more than willing to assist him with.
"Think nothing of it." Malleus's power is truly terrifying, Yutu is torn between sorrow that he wasn't on their side and relief he didn't overblot a second time. "You are Lilia's son yes? That makes you my subject, and a most precious one at that." Not that Yutu has avoided interacting with Malleus exactly, he's just found talking to him exceptionally awkward because well. He's not Yuu, he's very aware of how important Malleus is supposed to be. But the way he's looking at him now makes him think that maybe he was missing out on interacting with another older brother.
Something that's confirmed when he turns to see how big his father's eyes have gotten, the man is shaking as he stares at his face and flicks between him, Malleus, and Silver like he's staring at the most precious pieces of art in the whole universe.
As you brought up Lilia's survival isn't guaranteed, I did not solve that problem at all. I sort of just... wrote that Lilia would age more or less like a normal human and not really be able to use magic on par with what a fae would consider normal but would still be impressive to a human... so while Lilia might be a bit reluctant to show his face in Briar Valley he would still have enough years to have and raise Yutu. He might have actually died around the same time as Yuu if they had lived a normal life.
He is overwhelmingly excited at the thought of having another baby. Lilia might not know what to do with them but he does really like kids. What's harder for him to accept is his relationship with Yuu. Raising a child is something he's done before, being someone's long term partner is not. He is unused to feeling desirable, and unfamiliar with acting on his own desires. Sure Lilia might seem very free spirited, but much of his life has been dictated by a sense of duty. The thought of having something precious to him that chose him specifically of their own free will is... disarming. He's overwhelmed with how helpless you make him feel and how little he despises it.
Yutu's need to be accepted by his father is met and exceeded almost immediately. Lilia wants to cook a big family dinner for Yuu and all of his boys, something that Malleus politely rejects asking if he can instead show his Culinary Crucible skills off to Yutu (it's really so he can make babiest brother promise to never eat anything Paw Paw makes EVER) and it's all so normal Yutu almost forgets that he's listening to a practical god smugly tell him he knows all about edible weeds as his father flies around him cracking jokes and pinching his cheeks. His older brother is asleep on the couch waiting for the food to be done and his precious parent is helping his Uncle Sebek set the table, listening to him sniffle about how beautiful Master Lilia's family is.
Lilia might be practically retired, but his mind is still sharp. The information Yutu is able to pass on to him lands in good hands. When he tucks Yutu into bed that night, long after the boy has gone to sleep so as not to embarrass him he makes sure to take a good long look at the little miracle. He is beyond grateful Yutu exists, not even the Thorn Fairy could have given him a finer blessing (he'll have to make sure to tease you about that later, that's got to be a good pick up line) He will make sure that this risk his son has taken pays off, Lilia Vanrouge wasn't feared for no reason. Something it seems some foolish mortals need reminding of.
#<3 asks#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#lilia vanrouge x reader#future kid au#i believe in big brother malleus supremacy#he wants to be called older brother but refuses to ask since that would be undignified#but if yutu calls him that he gets so excited the tail comes out and starts wagging
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Helo,hello , I really really enjoy your Truth and inference series, and I'm so happy that your request box is open.
/*excited noises
Can I request the whole truth and inference cast reacting to a modern reader?(I really think there should be more idv x modernreader fictions),thank you, thank you.😘
Of course, I love exploring more of the T&I universe so it always excites me to be asked something about
D.M/Désire Mélodis
• When he discovered it, it was as if a million new possibilities had appeared to him,
• If with the knowledge of the time, it was already dangerous, with modern knowledge then...
• Everyone realized that he was treating you better than he treated others, just so he wouldn't lose you to Mr. Inference,
• Tuberose got a little jealous when he realized that D.M was treating you well and Gatto was deeply afraid of that,
• Passing on the knowledge you have to D.M can be one of the most dangerous things to do, you can't predict what this man will do,
• In general, even though he has ulterior motives for you, he seems to treat you well because he wants to, not to get information out of you, he is a real mystery
Noir/Saphir Mélodis
• He found this extremely interesting when he learned,
• Just as he found it interesting, the concern came in threefold,
• He doesn't want D.M to find out for fear of what his brother might do to you,
• Crimson also helps you hide your secret, since according to herself, nothing will stop her from treating you like a little sister,
• Sometimes, out of curiosity, Noir asks what things are like in the modern world and never ceases to be surprised by his answers,
• According to him, he would love to see how everything will turn out, but he knows he won't live long enough for that, so he is content just listening to their stories
Gatto/Aesop Carl
• First he was shocked, then excited, and finally confused,
• What would a person from the future be doing in the past, he thought, but the excitement of learning new things about chemistry was greater,
• He asked, even in a shy way, for you to teach everything you knew about medicine and modern chemistry,
• I can say that I have never seen a Gatto as excited as he was while you explained and demonstrated everything you knew to him,
• Even Cat was fascinated by his knowledge after making a delicious salmon dish that she had never even dreamed of trying before,
• You and Gatto made a promise that this would be your secret and no one else would know
Mr. Inference/Naib Subedar
• He was very excited for several reasons and one of them was that with his knowledge of his time, he would get evidence to put D.M behind bars,
• Lady Truth scolded him for thinking about using you to get rid of D.M, then he apologized to you,
• To make up for what he wanted to do, he bought you a basket of sweets which he shared with White and Lady Truth,
• You taught Mr. Inference everything you knew out of your own free will and he learned much faster than you imagined,
• For him, meeting you was like a blessing from the gods, after all, even if you weren't someone from modern times, you were still a great companion for him and his friends, so he felt grateful for that
White/Saphir Mélodis
• When you felt comfortable telling him, it was his happiest day, even though he already knew,
• Every fraction of a second, this boy asked a different question,
• Even though it was tiring answering so many questions, seeing his surprised and interested look, it was worth all the tiredness,
• Whenever you finish answering his questions, q he will say that I would love to be able to see with my own eyes what you are talking about,
• Even if it feels sad in your chest to hear him say that and know it's a lie, you still smile and say, who knows...
• Of course he notices that you are sad and showers you with affection, after all, for him, seeing your sad face is worse than death
#identity v x reader#joseph desaulnier x reader#identity v truth & inference#joseph desaulnier d.m#aesop carl x reader#naib subedar x reader#aesop carl gatto#eli clark noir#eli clark x reader#eli clark white#naib subedar mr. inference
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Separation Anxiety
Written for Maiko Week 2024 - Separation
Summary: Mai takes Izumi to her family’s reunion, and Zuko stays home. It's a horrible time for both of them.
Author’s Note: I really thought I was going to stick to the prompt this time, but then the first part sort of got away from me. And I really had to hold back because my inner Kataang was about to unleash. I was about to write a whole mini-fic about them inside of this one, but I exercised restraint. I did not however exercise restraint on my thoughts about Mai’s upbringing. As a result, this is way longer than I intended. Oh well… I hope you enjoy! :)
TW: Anxiety about being parents and misogyny from Mai’s family members. I made Michi kind of awful. But there’s a happy ending, I promise!
WC: 4,276
Zuko took a deep breath and stared at his large empty bed. It had been a long while since he had to sleep alone. He sat down slowly, as if the bed might vanish at the last second before he made contact. He leaned back and tried to get comfortable, but he ended up tossing and turning until his memories overtook him.
— —
When he and Mai were newlyweds, they agreed never to spend more than a week apart at a time. Sometimes the obligations of royalty made this vow difficult to keep, but they had managed. In fact, Zuko had been in Yu Dao when Mai found out that she was pregnant. They had been trying for some time, so Mai was ecstatic when she told him.
Her excitement was contagious, but anxiety quickly infected him as well. He couldn’t stop thinking about what could have happened to her while he was away. What if she had fallen ill? Or what if an Ozai loyalist cell re-emerged and attacked her? Thankfully, most of the organized movements had died down after Azula had willingly turned herself in. But that was another consideration, what if Azula tried to get revenge on Mai while he was gone? He knew that Mai was more than capable of protecting herself, and normally that was enough to allay his fears, but the new worry for their child fractured his restraint.
Zuko doubled Mai’s guard and silently promised himself to stay by her side for the rest of her pregnancy. He knew that his actions would probably annoy his wife, but surprisingly she was not the first to complain.
“Zuko, she’s pregnant, not helpless,” his mother chided him. She had cornered him in one of the hallways about a week after his return from Yu Dao. “There are always going to be circumstances beyond your control, but Mai is fully competent to go about her daily life without a small army. You need to give her space to breathe. Give your baby space to grow.”
Zuko relented and recalled the extra guards he had assigned, but then he added a pair of covert guards to keep watch without being stifling. For her part, Mai found the incident somewhat amusing.
As they ate dinner together, she commented on the change: “Yesterday, I had a whole coterie. Today all I get are a few extra shadows.”
Zuko sighed. “Mom told me I was being overbearing. But I’m worried about you. What if something happens? You’re my whole world Mai.”
Mai turned red. “I’m impressed that anything you say can still make me blush after you impregnated me, but here we are.” Zuko chuckled, and Mai continued, “Normally I wouldn’t be cool with extra guards out of nowhere. I’m your wife and your equal, so I would like to be included in the conversation the next time you think about changing up my security detail.”
She gave him a pointed look, and Zuko took her hand. “I’m sorry. I should have asked you first. We can ditch the elite guards if you want.
Mai’s eyes softened and she brought his hand to her cheek. “No, it’s okay. I’m not angry this time, I just want you to talk to me about things like this in the future.” She kissed his palm and set their hands on the table.
Zuko smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “I didn’t want to upset you. I’ve never seen you so happy. And I’m happy too! I’m just…”
“Zuko, I’m scared too. I really want this baby to come out healthy. I’ve been carrying this list of foods I can’t have anymore, and I read it at least five times before I eat anything,” she admitted sheepishly. Mai produced said scroll from one of her dart holsters of all places. Zuko felt himself fall even more in love. The whole thing was just so Mai.
After that conversation, the pair discussed their concerns much more openly. In the worst moments, they both feared that they would take on the worst qualities of their parents. Zuko started to feel phantom pains in his scar that hadn’t plagued him since he was a teenager. They made pact after pact to hold each other accountable and to love the baby no matter what and to keep them safe.
But even talking about their fears in the open helped to lift the burden. The anxiety didn’t dissipate, but it became easier to bear. Zuko loved talking to Mai’s bump when she began to show. Mai teased him for being silly, but he knew she secretly loved it. They redecorated the palace nursery to be less austere and more inviting. And Aang and Katara often visited with their son Bumi.
When Mai went into labor, Katara helped her through the whole process until Princess Izumi had safely arrived. Aang was on babysitting duty. Not for Bumi, who Aang considered to be his full time sidekick, but for Zuko, who could only watch his wife’s agony for so long until he needed a dad to dad pep talk.
Thankfully, Zuko managed to collect himself in time to meet his baby girl in her first moments. Mai had suggested the name Izumi, and Zuko immediately knew that it was right when he saw her tiny red face. She captivated his heart from her first breath and– after a brief embrace from Mai– Zuko was the first person to truly hold her. When the nurses took her for her health check, Zuko almost refused. Looking at her perfect little face, he realized that he could never become his father. He swore to himself on that day to always be by her side when she needed him.
— —
Zuko gave up on trying to sleep and began to pace in his room. Without Mai, his bed was too cold and too big. Michi, his mother in-law, had insisted that she and Izumi attend her family reunion. Zuko had been invited, but his advisors had already scheduled the large annual conference of the provincial governors for the same weekend. He didn’t want to sabotage Mai’s opportunity to see her family, but he had desperately wanted her to stay.
And little Izumi was only four. Would she be sad when he wasn’t there to wake up with her at sunrise as he had been for the past four years? Since his job and his nature as fire-bender necessitated early mornings, when Izzy was a baby they decided that Mai would be in charge of bed time and night-time feedings and Zuko would take over in the wee hours of the morning. This arrangement worked surprisingly well, and continued long after Izzy started eating solid food. Zuko loved that he always had a few hours with his daughter. In the early days, he had a crib installed in his office so he could get a start on the his work after she fell back asleep. Now she was big enough to run through his forms with him. Zuko didn’t want to put any pressure on her to be bender or not, so he would alternate between Firebending forms and other martial arts. Would she practice them without him? She didn’t have any of them committed to memory but she would often try to show off to Mai with gusto. He smiled at the thought.
But he quickly frowned again, knowing he wouldn’t be there to see. “Ugh!” he grabbed his hair and berated himself: “Don’t be such a coward! You’ve slept on the road with nothing but a stolen ostrich horse. You can handle two nights with them.”
He walked over to Mai’s vanity and sat. He picked up a book that she recently finished reading and thumbed through the pages. Then, he picked up her jar of perfume and sprayed it experimentally. He inhaled her signature scent and sighed.
Truthfully, he was worried about her well-being away from him too. He wasn’t arrogant enough to assume that she couldn’t go-on without his presence for a few measly days, but he knew how her mother and grandparents could be. Even when she was little, he recalled how Michi would nitpick at her posture or her expression or her word choice. He was ashamed that it took him so long to realize just how conditional her parental affection was.
In retrospect, it made sense why she loved her uncle just as much as he loved his. When he first met the Warden of the Boiling Rock, he didn’t quite see the appeal. The man was terrifying and brutish and he had a nasty power-complex. But it all fit into place when he saw them together at the wedding. Michi had been chiding Mai for getting her wedding slippers dusty during their first dance, and Zuko was about to ask her to leave. He couldn’t believe that she chose that moment to undercut her daughter, but the Warden stepped in. “Oh knock it off! This is her palace, not a prison yard. How about you go get a drink while I dance with my niece.” And just like that, Mai’s super traditional and stuck-up uncle led her in the camelephant strut. They were both a bit clumsy, especially Mai since her robes were constantly in the way, but their rare and radiant smiles made the moment perfect.
Aunt Mura was another advocate for Mai, but her support was more quiet and diplomatic. A hand on the shoulder here, and words of encouragement there. Mura was so much more gentle and less acerbic than Michi, that it was easy to forget that she had been raised with the same unfair expectations. She approached her sister with more empathy than Zuko was willing to extend.
Zuko hoped that the pair of them would keep Michi in line. Unfortunately, from his limited contact he knew that Mai’s grandparents might also pose a problem. He had a sudden and unpleasant vision of Mai’s grandmother and Michi making comments about Izumi’s behavior. He gritted his teeth. He knew Mai wouldn’t stand for it, but it set him on edge.
Mai had really come into her own as a Fire Lady. She was always very calm in a crisis, but she spoke passionately about the issues that moved her. She would let her excitement show when her projects came to fruition. She learned how to be vulnerable in order to build trust with their citizens.
His biggest fear was that she would return, and, after their separation, some of that precious progress would be undone. And that Izumi’s light would shine a little dimmer in turn.
He stood from the vanity and shook his head, as if he could dislodge the poisonous thoughts. Normally when something caused him to worry, he would talk about it with his wife. Now he was at a loss. Maybe a nice walk in the cool night air would clear his mind. He could visit Druk in the stables. He muttered to himself as he made his way, “She’s an adult. She doesn’t need you breathing down her neck.”
— —
Mai was on the verge of tears. She needed Zuko desperately.
They had left early that morning in an airship for the Southern region of the Fire Nation where her grandparents lived, and Mai was cautiously optimistic. Since she woke up so early, Izzy slept for the two hours of travel time to the house. It was a lovely opportunity to talk to Tom-Tom, who– at the age of 17– was often busy with school these days.
But everything changed when they landed. Her grandparents greeted her formally, but more warmly than they ever had. And she soon discovered why: this was her first visit to their hometown as the Fire Lady. When she entered their home, she was dismayed to find a throne and a receiving line! Thankfully, Tom-Tom offered to watch Izumi and get her some food, while Mai was forced to meet the Mayor and all of her grandparents' friends. After an hour of accepting well-wishes, backhanded compliments, and personal requests, he uncle arrived. He walked up to her confidently and insisted that she and Izumi take tea with him and Mura. Apparently being the Warden of the Boiling Rock gave him the authority to terminate her indentured servitude.
Tea was a brief affair. However she re-entered the gaggle of distant relatives and vaguely important people with her uncle on her arm, and Tom-Tom again stepped in to watch Izumi as she played with the other children. Mai loved her little brother to bits, but this experience made her appreciate him all the more. She was thirteen when he was born, so she felt fiercely protective of him when he was little. And he was thirteen when Izzy was born, and she could see him return all of that love and shower it on her. The thought made her emotional.
Dinner came late, well past Izumi’s normal bedtime, but it was a blessedly private affair. Her grandparents; her mother, aunt, and uncle; and herself, Tom-Tom, and Izumi. Oh, and the Mayor, but he spent a significant portion of the night wooing Aunt Mura so he was easy enough to tune out. Uncle showed Izzy magic tricks with his napkin, and Mai smiled. She had nearly forgotten how he used to do the same for her. He would have been a good father if he hadn’t chosen such a demanding profession. She regretted that she had only seen him a handful of times since her wedding.
Mai’s grandparents kept her in conversation. To her surprise, they praised Zuko and his reforms highly. At first she was pleased, but then her mood began to sour.
“I don’t know how you pulled a match like that. You were always so sullen as a girl,” her grandfather remarked.
Mai felt her mother’s keen stare and tried to laugh it off. “Well… he always said he liked how I hated the world.”
Her grandfather frowned and she worried she misspoke, but her grandmother interjected, “Oh happiness is overrated. True contentment comes with status. You did well to act in a manner pleasing to him.”
Mai felt her stomach turn. She never acted differently for Zuko. He challenged her preconceived notions sometimes and helped her see different points of view, but she didn’t blindly follow him like an animal. Was that how she appeared? Izumi wasn’t hearing this was she? She looked at her daughter, but, no, Uncle was telling her a story about a prison riot. Somehow, that was probably a healthier message for her impressionable child.
Michi joined the conversation, “Oh mother, it’s all thanks to you! I took your advice and got her into the palace early. Her friendship with Princess Azula was most beneficial. She was the natural choice to be Zuko’s consort.”
Mai felt suddenly nauseous. Her friendship with Azula was strained in a lot of ways, but it was built on a genuine foundation. They had both loved sparring as girls, along with Ty Lee of course. They would sneak from the stuffy functions her mother dragged her to. Michi couldn’t take credit for any of that, and she certainly couldn't take credit for her love with Zuko.
Mai gripped the edge of the table, prepared to tell her off. “Actually!” she began confidently, and all of the eyes in the room turned toward her. Apparently her Uncle had finished his story and Mura had politely rebuffed the Mayor. But it was the full and undivided attention of her grandparents that got to her. She remembered why silence and falsity were her friends. Mai quickly thought of an excuse for her outburst. “Zuko wanted me to tell you how sorry he is that he couldn’t make it. He sends his love.”
“Darling, told us that before.” her grandmother replied. “He is the Fire Lord, you should not expect him to attend your family affairs.”
Mai wilted. “Of course, grandmother. But he asked me to tell you, so I wanted to relay his words.”
Her grandfather smiled, “Yes, a good wife echoes her husband.”
Mai snuck another look at Izumi, praying that she was not listening. Luck seemed to be on her side, as the little princess was absorbed and– covered in– the noodles on her plate.
Mai got them out of there as quickly as she deemed socially acceptable and washed the noodles off of her little girl.. She cursed herself for her cowardice. She was the Fire Lady! She could have left whenever she damn well pleased, but she turned into a child the second she entered that house.
To make matters worse, as soon as she and Izumi entered their chambers the little girl began having a meltdown.
It started innocently enough: “Where’s dada?”
Mai pursed her lips. She had tried explaining to Izumi before they left that daddy couldn’t come with them this time, but the thought was unimaginable to her. They had always traveled as a family, and she had never had to sleep without a goodnight kiss from daddy before Mai began the bedtime routine.
Mai tried again to explain, “I’m sorry turtleduck, but he’s not here right now. He had to stay at the palace and run the country. We’ll see him in two more sleeps.”
Izumi teared up. “Not here?”
Mai held her, “No. He’s not here, but he’s safe and so are we. You’ll see him soon.”
Then the wailing began in earnest and it did not stop for what felt like hours but was probably minutes. Mai tried to be soothing, but firm. For better or worse, she couldn’t capitulate to her daughter’s request this time. No airships or secure transports were running at this hour. And Zuko would probably spontaneously combust if she rented an animal and attempted the overnight journey alone.
Mai felt the tears prick in her eyes too. Since her parents were so strict, she had no gauge for how to react to this situation. Was she being too indulgent by letting her daughter cry? How could she stop it? What could she say to make her happy again? All at once, the floodgates of self-loathing had opened. She was the co-ruler of a country, why did she let her grandparents walk all over her in front of her daughter? And how could she foist Izumi on to her baby brother all day? It was his family reunion too.
She needed Zuko. He would calm Izzy down. Spirits, he would calm her down.
There was a knock at the door. Shit! Their rooms were in the farthest part of the manor to give the Fire Lady privacy, but someone had obviously overheard and complained. There would be rumors all over the town about how bad of a parent she was. Or it was her guards checking in. The poor guys probably wanted to make sure she was okay. She tucked Izumi behind her, and palmed a knife– just to be safe– and opened the door.
For a second, she thought her brain was deceiving her into seeing what she wanted to see.
“DADA!” Izumi screamed happily.
She ran around Mai and jumped into his arms. “Hello turtleduck.” He laughed and kissed her head as he made his way into the room. “I hope I’m not intruding on girl time.” He smiled at Mai.
She took a deep breath to try to compose herself and smiled back at her husband. “Of course, not. Our princess was just demanding your presence.”
“Oh!” Zuko seemed genuinely surprised. “Well then, I’m glad I arrived just in time.” He tucked Izumi into her bed, across the room from Mai’s– and now Zuko’s– larger one. She must have been exhausted from her early travels, because, as soon as she knew that both of her parents were in the room, she fell asleep. Mai marveled at her instant calm.
Zuko stroked her hair a few times and then turned his attention to his wife. He walked over to her and delicately pulled her into an embrace. “I’m such a loser,” he whispered, face buried in her neck, and it felt so out-of-the-blue that she nearly snorted.
“What on earth are you talking about? I need more information to know if I disagree,” she retorted.
“Hey!” he protested quietly, and pinched her arm, but she could feel his smile on her skin. His breath tickled as he spoke: “I couldn’t handle one night away from you both. Let alone two.”
Mai caressed his cheek, and guided his face so they were looking into each other's eyes. “Then I must be a loser too because I was about to cry before you got here. Izumi was sobbing because she missed you so much and my family–” she stopped abruptly.
Zuko took hold of her hands and she could feel the fire in his eyes. “What did they say?”
Mai slumped her shoulders and allowed herself to lean against him. “It’s not important.” That dreaded touch of apathy colored her voice, but then, but a glimmer of broke through. “It’s really not important because you’re here now.”
Zuko wrapped his arms around her and kissed her passionately. He finally pulled away, “At least give me a list of names.”
Mai chuckled quietly, she didn’t want to wake their daughter. “The usual suspects.”
That told Zuko all he needed to know. The pair went about their nightly routines, before climbing into bed. Zuko longed to kiss her more, and fill her with reassurance, but he was prevented by the presence of their daughter. He settled for wrapping his arms tightly around Mai and burying his face in her hair.
But suddenly she broke away and sat up. Zuko pouted up at her.
“Wait! Wait a minute! How did you get here?” she looked at him in awe.
He smiled cheekily. “You know I’ve been practicing flying with Druk.”
Mai crossed her arms. “You did not fly him all the way here from the Caldera! His previous flights were twenty minutes at most. My poor baby is probably exhausted.”
Zuko laughed. Druk may have been bonded to him by the sacred fire, but the dragon was bonded to Mai by something else. The two were so protective of each other that it was almost comical.
“Oh don’t worry,” Zuko reassured her, and pulled her back into his arms. “Your big old baby loved it, and your family’s servants gave him the best room in their stables.”
Mai huffed. “Okay, but if he’s sore tomorrow, then I’m using you as a pin cushion.”
“It would be my greatest honor.”
Mai rolled her eyes, but she snuggled in closer.
— —
The next day, Mai checked on Druk first thing. To her own surprise, she was the first member of her immediate family awake. She left Zuko a note. (Her notes always began, “I don’t know how to tell you this, but I’m leaving,” even if she was just taking the five-minute trip to her favorite fire flakes stand. It had become an inside joke between them.)
Druk truly was in a great mood. Mai’s family ordered the finest cuts from the butcher as a special treat. If there was one thing she could count on her grandparents to do, it was suck up to royalty.
She stopped by the kitchens and put in a special request, and then she made her way to the airship service. By the time she arrived back at the house, breakfast had begun. She slowly took her seat, allowing her mother's glare to linger.
“Young lady,” he grandfather began. “It is bad form to arrive late to a meal. “Especially when royalty is present.”
Mai pretended to be chastened. “Oh, I’m so sorry grandfather. But I wanted to put on a surprise for my dearest husband.” She strongly emphasized the word. “As you and Grandmother were saying, such a visitation to my family is quite beneath him actually.” Zuko whipped his head to his in-laws. Mai could tell he was seething, but this was her moment to reclaim power. She knew he would follow her lead, and so she continued, “As such, I thought it would be a lovely surprise if we all took a trip to the nearby southern beaches.”
Mai’s grandmother scoffed. “Those aren’t nearby. You’d have to take an airship to get there.”
Mai nodded, “Yes and I chartered one. Unfortunately, it’s quite small. They only had ten open seats.”
Mai’s mother tried to cut the tension. “Oh well… That’s still enough for all of us, and we can even bring the Mayor. Perhaps the day can be salvaged, but you really should have asked your grandparents before doing this.”
Michi didn’t want to look bad in front of her parents, and Mai almost regretted what she was about to do. She replied: “You’re not taking into account the guards. We’ll need four to be safe I would say. I’m so very sorry. I assumed that grandfather and grandmother would be too weary to travel so far, so I didn’t list them on the tickets. And Uncle and Auntie have so few opportunities to see Izumi. I hope you understand, Mother.”
Michi flushed red, but she wouldn’t dare have a dramatic and drawn out argument with Mai so publicly. The Warden chuckled to himself, “Now this is an escape plan I can get behind.”
Zuko looked at his wife with a newfound admiration. He knew there would come a time when they were separated again, but he did not want to dwell on it. In this moment, they were together. And they were stronger because of it.
#maikoweek2024#maiko week 2024#atla maiko#atla mai#atla zuko#maiko#mai#zuko#atla#avatar the last airbender#mai x zuko#zuko x mai#Michi#Tom-Tom#Aunt Mura#Mai's family#Mai is a good mom#Zuko is a good dad
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⚠️ CW: Suicide, Toxic relationships, depression, mention of self-harm
Why I believe that House's story ends with tragedy post season 8 - an opinion piece:
Hello everyone, this is a remake of a post I did a couple years ago on an older blog. If you find it familiar, I'm sorry if this one is a bit messier than the original. It's been longer since my last rewatch.
So, let's recap the finale of House MD: Treating a drug addict patient results in House examining his life, his future and confronting his own personal demons.
As we know, House ends up faking his death in this episode, after going on a 2 day drug fuelled bender with his drug addicted patient. The patient ends up overdosing & dying, and House remains to confront his 8 seasons worth of demons. At the end he escapes the firery scene & fakes his death by switching his medical records. After all of that, he runs away with Wilson to spend his remaining 5 months to live.
Before House replies to what Wilson is saying, he thinks for a moment. I want try & piece together what was going through his head at that moment evaluating his life:
1. Every romantic relationship with House ends in heartbreak
Stacy
Season 2, Episode 11
Cameron
Season 3, Episode 8
Lydia
Season 5, Episode 23-24
Cuddy
Season 5, Episode 6 // Season 7, Episode 23
Dominika
Season 8, Episode 13 // Season 8, Episode 18
Every single one of these relationship was ended because House either deliberately behaved in a way that would push the love interest away or by breaking their trust. House was never actively malicious towards his partners, but he was not a very good partner. He was self centered, self loathing, very much focused on himself (even when trying to be as supportive & caring as possible) but at the end of every relationship, the women understood that they could not remain in a Healthy relationship with House. Either because he refused to tackle his addiction, his psychological distress & trauma or be honest with them and respect them as equal to him in their relationship.
2. House's relationship with his family
House was severely abused by his father, a military man, both physically & emotionally. His mother did not protect him from said abuse (probably because of feeling deeply guilty about her affair that gave birth to Gregory), which lead to him growing in an abusive houshold that was built on lies, dysfunction & distance (which partially explains his behavior in the show, especially his approach to human nature: "Everybody Lies"). House was never really close with his parents, so it would make sense that he would not rely on them for support in any way, not even in a life or death situation such as him feeling at his lowest in every aspect of his life. In addition to that, he may even doubt how much his loss would effect his parents if something were to happen to him.
3. House's suicidal ideation
House is shown numerous times in the show to not reject the option of ending his life. He actively tries to commit suicide twice during the show (Merry Little Christmas, season 3 episode 11 // Simple Explanation, season 5 episode 20), ponders it in the season finale (Everybody Dies, season 8 episode 22) but decides against it, choosing to fake his death instead.
In addition to that, he also indulges in self-harm in the form of cutting himself (also "Merry Little Christmas" & "Nobody's Fault"), intentionally hurting his limbs (leg - "Under My Skin", hand - "After Hours").
Like Wilson said, House cannot go back from that decision (similarly to how you can never come back from suicide). He can never have access his addictions: puzzles (medicine) & escapism (Vicodin & other drugs). We know how House gets without his meds, he becomes... A shadow of himself. Sometimes it's a violent dark figure, sometimes it's an apathetic & silent husk, sometimes it's a dark creature screaming in agony, sometimes it's just House, but something is off. Without constant puzzles, dissecting human nature & feeding his ego & emotional needs, he's lost.
Unlike other characters, like Dexter Morgan from the Showtime series "Dexter" House never treats suicide like it is somehow "beneath him":
Dexter speaks to Sg. Doakes, Season 2 Episode 11
Compare & contrast that to House's reaction to Taub pleading with House to try & understand Wilson's decision to discontinue his cancer treatment & to die with dignity:
Season 8, Episode 21
Just the thought of Wilson passing away before his time triggers House's suicidal thoughts. He disregards the patients & visitors in the background, the colleagues that may hear, Taub himself, everyone. This, in my opinion was the start of the "nothing else matters anymore" mindset. House was already at the end of his rope, and losing the person he loves more than anything else in the world was just... Too much.
4. House doesn't see a future without Wilson
In season 6, Episode 10, House refuses to be present during Wilson's surgery at first:
Wilson: I want you to be there
House, after thinking: No.
Wilson: Why?
House: Because if you die, I'm alone.
House cannot fathom the possibility of witnessing Wilson die. He cannot even consider for a moment to stand before Wilson's lifeless body & realizing that this is it, he is completely & utterly alone in this world.
We see multiple times that House not only cares deeply about Wilson, he is also dependant on him, to the point of the relationship often becoming toxic for both of them (hurting other relationships, sabotaging new ones, need for validation of both the relationship itself & both of them of each other individually, indulging unhealthy behaviors towards others etc).
But we all remember how that situation concluded:
House watching over Wilson as a big bright light washes over him as he loses consciousness. To me, this seems like foreshadowing for what's to come after the season finale, after those last 5 months.
Another thing that caught my eye was him stating "I can live without Kyle" (season 8, episode 20) when referring to a guy that stole Wilson's prom date when he was in highschool. He wanted to immitate said 'Kyle' for the entire episode, trying his best to act uncaring, aloof, "alpha". Essentially, to act out of character. But numerous times in said episode, Wilson still displayed the very same characteristics that both House and the audience love so much about him. So House affirms that he cannot live in a world without Wilson, just the way he is.
5. House is willing to preform a "mercy kill" for his close friends
In the episode "The Dig" (Season 7, Episode 18), House assures Thirteen, who's diagnosed with Huntington's, that he is willing to euthanize her when her Huntington symptoms worsen (this happens after Thirteen confides in House, telling him about how she killed her own brother after his Huntington symptoms worsened. House's reaction left Thirteen shocked, hurt & disappointed, as it seemed like he did not care at all. But we know he did, very deeply).
House gets a positive reaction from Thirteen, which is later also approved to the audience & the people in House's funeral when she states in her eulogy: "He was willing to kill me". Wilson, as we know, is also in the audience. He then knows that House is willing to preform a "mercy kill" on a loved one. He also mentions it in the finale:
Wilson: When the cancer starts getting really bad-
House, putting a halmet on: Cancer's boring.
I want us to return to the "I'm dead, Wilson" scene:
House is at a point in which he feels like he has nothing left to lose. He has no close friends that give him meaning besides Wilson, no family to rely on, no romantic relationship seems to last, he feels powerless when it comes to his addiction to drugs, he is facing jail time after accidently breaking an MRI machine with Foreman's ticket gift which he flushed down the hospital's toilet (which may as well cause him to be fired & lose his job and/or license to practice medicine, in addition to the fact he faked his own death).
We already know that House is prone to depression, self harm & suicidal ideation (including attempts), we've covered that he is willing to end a loved ones life if there is no medical solution to their health related state, we know that Wilson is not (to our knowledge up to the last episode) willing to go through any other treatment & we know that House cannot live without Wilson.
Adding all of this up & remembering the foreshadowing of Wilson's health related issue & House's course of action (watching over him as a bright light covers the screen as he loses consciousness) I believe that after those 5 months, when the cancer gets really bad, House will take Wilson's life... And then, his own.
This is essentially the end of the post, but I would like to add a few things:
Disclaimer: this post is not meant in any way to promote, encourage or agree with anything that supports one taking their own life, self harming or any other kind of self inflicted damage. This is just a theory based on how I've precieved House's character.
I am considering writing a short fic based on this post, and would like to know if anyone is interested in reading it.
Thank you very much for reading, have a good day 🙏🏼
#house md#dr gregory house#dr house#hugh laurie#david shore#house md on fox#house md on netflix#dr wilson#dr james wilson#wilson#house#hilson#house x wilson#wilson x house#cw sui mention#cw sui ideation#cw sui thoughts#cw addiction#cw toxic relationship#cw drug abuse#cw drug addiction#tv show#tv series#theory#mental health in media#opinion post#opinion piece#fandom
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Hi everyone!
It is I, Aduah, the grandma herself. I just wanted to say a lil thing.
First of all, thanks for all your support! All the comments, reblogs, likes and asks really motivate me to keep going with this passion project! I know it’s getting a bit confusing, I will improve the tags so you’ll be able to follow the specific ones you want and ignore the rest!
Second of all, sorry if that anon hate attacked you as well. I wanted to reassure you that you’re not wrong for following and liking my stuff. I know some characters deviate from canon, but when you age people up, you also gotta take into consideration what happened in the timeskip and how it affects them. Some character are more “OCfied” than others, depends on who we are talking about and how they were in the show. I will put my own spin on them and put them into situations I myself found into. I think that’s what we do to cope with them, and that’s ok! As long as your visions don’t step on others’ and are not forced or controversial, you can read a character as you want!
That’s the beauty of fandoms, everyone has their story and their interpretation of characters! We can’t make 100% canon accurate depitions, we literally can NOT. Because we’re just fans. Only the original authors can make canon content. We’re here to fill the blanks with what we like!
I didn’t post that anon hate to gain simpathy. I am a grown ass adult who tries to let stress out by inventing stories from kids shows, I have been through enough already. I won’t cry for someone calling me “toxic”, especially if they won’t elaborate it. That’s just the only way I can answer them. If they sent an ask with their account, I could have replied in private. Or they can reach me with DMs. I’m open for adult talk.
I just got irritated they specifically tried to hurt anyone following me. That’ s just… hateful. That’s pure, free, unmotivated hate. Idk what this anon has going on in their life to be this spiteful, but I hope they will get in a better space! I have been there, I know sometimes people think hate helps. It doesn’t. But yeah, maybe they will get happy in the future! That’s what I hope for them!
Again, please don’t feel bad for following me. I will try and improve more and more!
Thank you for your trust!
Aduah 🐔
#ramble#random#important#love u all#feel better#I know it feels like I get 294748 hate messages but this is the first and I hope only one#I just wanted to put this out#stay safe
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Do people think loml is about Matty? I thought the "all at once" line seals it for me. Very direct callback to KOMH (and it tears me apart every time). Also the "get-love-quick scheme" seems like she's saying she was wrong bout Joe not being just like the others. She also has referenced themes of 'loss' with respect to him, so the fact that it changes to 'loss of my life' in the end is a pretty big deal.
Also;
you shit-talked me under the table//I talk shit with my friends, it's like I'm wasting your honor.
Talking rings and talking cradles // give you a wild, give you a child // I'd marry you with paper rings
When your impressionist paintings of heaven turned out to be fakes // You paint dreamscapes on the wall
Still alive, killing time at the cemetery // Till we were too far gone to bring back to life
I know it mentions rekindled flames and the 'counterfeit' line is a reference to Glitch which might be about Matty, but there's too many callbacks to Joe which makes me think it's taking a page out of both relationships rather than one.
there are definitely shades of joe in it, because the donut hole in the entire album (ie, what is omitted but essential) is that she fell hard and fast for matty because she was leaving joe and was emotionally spiraling from that. she loved joe and they talked marriage, and kids, she was planning on a future with him, but their relationship fell apart. as they sometimes tend to do.
but my personal interpretation is that the "surface story" is more matty and explains how he got under her skin so fast. they rekindled the flame that burnt out for a reason last time - he said this time would be different, it wasn't. and at the end of it all she wanted to believe both were her fated soulmates, and they were not.
the subtext of the song (and many other songs on the album), though, is that she was trying to find what she'd spent a long time waiting for. oven -> microwave.
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Why do you like Skybound? From the little I’ve seen on tumblr, it looks like it’s made Starscream into a heartless, ruthless villain with no emotions and that doesn’t sound like something a Starscream fan would enjoy.
The thing about it is that, I like it because it is Starscream. Starscream is ruthless, he is heartless and he is a villain. Especially to humans. The only thing I don’t really like about Skybound is that, for two seconds, I was terrified he was killed off early but people are saying he might be alive?
I think the interesting thing about Starscream, depending on the iteration or what version of the character you absorb, is that he can be multifaceted. I think that the two Starscream’s we have now are Earthspark and Skybound Starscream. It’s fair to say that Earthspark Starscream is handled with a lot of nuance and respect for what happened to him, which is what I absolutely love and adore. But Starscream is still, at his core, before any form or redemption can ever take place, and awful person. Even Earthspark Starscream was not a good person until the episode dropped.
Skybound Starscream to me at least, isn’t that shocking because that shows us one of the many facets of Starscream he can be. I think that, given the various iterations we’ve had of him, and the franchises lack of actually committing to a type of Starscream, it is easy to mix those versions + fandom interpretation (which imo , does tend to water him down and overly pacify him for many reasons), and in a way, think they should be canon.
But in reality, despite the iterations, Starscream is not supposed to be viewed as a good person. At least, not to begin with. Starscream has always been an extremely violent, ruthless, manipulative and abusive person. Even in Earthspark, or TFP, or Cyberverse, etc. He has always resorted to violence to get what he wants. He mistreats those around him, and those who try to help him whether it be his Trine, Knockout, etc. That’s why I don’t think that Skybound is inaccurate because that’s just who he is. I think as Starscream fans, it’s logical to want a version of Starscream that is nuance and more complex because we have gotten that in the past, even among the violence. And I mean, other characters are allowed to have that.
But I’m also okay accepting that Skybound isn’t that version, and that Skybound is also very canon, and often times forgotten version of Starscream that I think the fanbase sometimes needs to be reminded of. I’ve spoken about this before, but while I am heavily empathetic toward Starscream, especially in like TFP and Earthspark (and IDW), he is still an awful person, and he actually has to change to get sympathy points. And what Skybound is doing is in a way, reminding us of that or leaning into that side of Starscream that is either overlooked by the fandom, or a side we haven’t seen in years.
I am literally all for crazed, violent characters like Starscream, and I do like it. Because I also think that, with all the discourse surrounding his character, it is important to recognize that he isn’t this helpless person who has done no wrong. He is still, at his core until he changes, a violent person. And it is satisfying seeing him be violent but also seeing him be held accountable for it.
Skybound Starscream, like all depictions of him, is realistic. I just don’t think we get the nuance or the sympathetic nature of him, which again is okay. That’s not to say that in the future, we don’t see it. Because I believe we will.
I am very curious to see how his relationship with Megatron is going to be, and in my mind I hope they have a good/better relationship but I hope they're good to each other, or at least can work together. I really don't want any of them to be redeemed I just want them to be terrible actually and just feed off of that.
#if i say that starscream is lucretia to megatron's batiatus and i need to see them be THAT bad in this comic#i actually dont want starscream to be a good guy at all#but in that i don't want megatron to be good either T-T#i want them both to be really evil#starscream#transformers skybound#tf skybound#energon universe
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I am giving you questions and you may be giving me answers: 2, 5, 20, 49, 51, 79,
2. What kind of emotions do the stars evoke for you, if any? The ocean, the sky, the moon?
The stars!! The sea!! The sky!! The moon!! So pretty!! Not that I see the sea more than every few years but still. I mean look at that sky!
Emotions? It depends I guess. It can be absolutely wonderful to sit by a sunset or under the stars with friends and talk about anything and everything. It can be really peaceful to hang up the laundry late at night outside and look up and see stars forever and ever. It can also feel incredibly lonely to look out the window and see stars or a sunset and hear your neighbors have friends over and wishing so badly you were with friends right now too. If you're already sad or upset, it can become especially bad to look up at the sky at night all by yourself and be reminded of every bad decision you ever made and wish you could just quit everything and run away, or turn back time.
5. Do you see your parents in your appearance or behaviour? Are they favourable traits?
Laura coming for my throat here, okay. My parents made me help them build a shelf today and once again I was reminded that I inherited my father's impatience and how much I hate that in myself (but at least I only direct that inwards instead of yelling lol), as well as my mother's tendency to cry easily which I hate even more, especially when it's because I'm angry or otherwise upset but not sad.
Appearance-wise, there's pretty much nothing, I think the last person who had blonde hair too was my great-grandmother or so? Oh yeah, the tendency to weigh a little more than average, pretty much all women in our families have that.
20. Do you think about your past or future more?
I spend an awful lot of time regretting things I did or said even if they're pretty long ago. I do wonder a lot what my life would look like if I'd made better choices and planned ahead more. I also wonder a lot about what my future will look like and honestly, that's terryfying, and only partly because I absolutely cannot imagine it. Daydreaming about it is nice, but actually thinking about it, especially right now shortly before going back to uni now that finally all my friends are done and moving on with their lives here at home? No thanks.
49. If you have a nickname, where did it come from? Did you choose it, did someone else, did it naturally form?
I mean.. I generally use Jess online as a short form of my full name, just because it's shorter and I don't like my name too much, and Jessi is only allowed for friends who've been using that forever. There's also Regenwurm which I do Not like but oh well. Don't ask me how that started, I don't remember either. Definitely someone else chose that though.
51. What can make you dislike someone very quickly?
Just like... being disrespectful to others and their rights in general. If you're rude to retail staff or listen to music loudly in public, I'll probably not like you right away; if you make stupid jokes about "haha you're angry are you on your period" or are against the right to abortion, I will want to punch you.
Also a petty reason but if I don't know you yet and you start a conversation by talking about your exercise and food intake plans, I'll not want to keep getting to know you probably, yeah.
79. What stupid thing are you really insecure about?
Uuh.. does my weight in photos count as a stupid thing? I can usually forget about it by now in everyday life, but when I see pictures of myself, I'm always right back at "I should lose weight". Maybe just the way I look in pictures in general, but I know that's because of your face being mirrored or not in photos and that making your brain irriated. Or something.
Also my time-management/planning realistically and then following through skills. Or the lack of it.
#sometimes i try to think about my future and it's like#----- head empty nothing found but a black empty void#not so fun fun fact: one of the major points of conflict between my oldest friend and me is her always voting green and then#turning around and saying stuff about refugees that should be said by someone who votes for the övp or fpö#and i'll listen to my friends' food and exercise discussions but only because they're already my friends and i can zone out when#it gets too much#yesterday this woman from my club i already don't like said she'll have a piece of my cake but then she has to go on the treadmill#for 2h because she's 'a fitness freak now haha' and i had to hold back SO HARD from rolling my eyes in her face#do those count as stupid things?#those were.. questions to think about for sure#chaoslaura#ask game#abortion mention
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Intensely Spicy Curry Training: Hypmic Curry Drama Track TL
Kuukou: Y’all sure took your sweet time getting here! I’ve already got everything prepared!
Jyushi: But didn’t you tell us to meet you at the temple?
Hitoya: If we’re making curry, why the hell are we way out in the mountains to do it?
Kuukou: Because I just had a great idea. Check this out!
Jyushi: Ooooh, look at all this meat! So, we’re going to be using all of this in our curry?
Hitoya: Beef and chicken, huh? I guess it would make sense not cook these while inside your temple.
Kuukou: You’re half right, and half wrong.
Jyushi: What do you mean?
Kuukou: I don’t plan to make just any ol’ curry. Now it’s time for the both of y’all to mince the hell out of this meat!!
Hitoya: I didn’t know whether to expect if a corrupt little monk such as yourself knew how to cook, but I’m surprised. Instead of using something pre-made, if we pound and mince the meat ourselves, we’d get a far more superior product. Is that what you were thinking?
Jyushi: Oh, I see! That’s amazing, Kuukou-san!
Hitoya: So, where’d you put the food processor?
Kuukou: Ah?? The hell are you on? You’re grinding this meat with your bare hands.
Jyushi: …Eh?
Kuukou: Jyushi, you’re on beef! Hitoya, you’re taking the chicken! Punch it with everything you’ve got and make minced meat out of it!! This is a new training session I thought up!
Hitoya: What the hell is this fool saying??
Jyushi: B-But there’s so much meat!! Grinding it by hand is impossible!!
Kuukou: I don’t want to hear any complaints!! You don’t know that unless you try!
Jyushi & Hitoya: *reluctantly pounds the meat by hand*
Jyushi: *tearfully* …My body’s going to become minced meat before the actual beef!
Hitoya: Damn it, I can’t believe I let my guard down like this…! I shouldn’t have expected we’d simply make curry…!
Kuukou: You can’t expect to get anywhere with a weak spirit behind weak fists like that!! Lemme show you how it’s done!
Kuukou: *starts punching*
Hitoya: You bastard, those are vegetables!!
Jyushi: E-Even I could mince a tomato by hand!
Kuukou: It doesn’t matter either way!! Whether it’s vegetables or meat, all that matters is the heart you’re putting behind it!!
Jyushi: T-That doesn’t make any sense…!!
Kuukou: “Enlightenment can be attained through one thousand fists!” Don’t just keep yapping and put some energy into your hips and legs too!
Hitoya: Tch, I don’t see any way out of this… Then, I might as well get it over with…!! UWOOOOOOOOOAAAARRRRGHHHH!!!!!!!! *maximum effort punching*
Jyushi: H-Hitoya-san??
Kuukou: Hyahaha! There’s the effort I wanna see!
Jyushi: Guh… Because My God has unshackled the chains binding his true power, I, too, must unlock mine to continue alongside him…! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!! *maximum effort punching*
-------------------------
Jyushi: I-I can’t move another inch…
Hitoya: Ugh… I can’t even take the cap off my water bottle…
Kuukou: *sighs* It’s pretty pathetic to be that exhausted just from cooking.
Hitoya: You…!!!
Jyushi: But, I think it would be really nice if our training efforts could be felt by those eating our curry…!
Hitoya: …Well, I don’t think I’d say it like that, but I agree with the sentiment.
*the trees rustle and the birds chirp and there is peace*
Kuukou: The fuck are y’all talking about? There’s no point to this if the people who eating aren’t going through training too.
Jyushi: Eh?
Kuukou: Training can only be felt when you grow from the trials you’ve experienced yourself. Hopping off from other people’s efforts won’t mean shit.
Jyushi: B-but I mean, we’ll still be serving the curry to others once it’s finished cooking, right?
Kuukou: Yup. Which is why I’ve got…!
Hitoya: UWAH!! MY EYES!! IT’S IN MY EYES!!
Jyushi: That powder…!!
Hitoya: It’s red chili pepper!! Jyushi, run!! Move upwind so it doesn’t blow and stick to your mucous membrane!!
Jyushi: Eeek!!! *runs away sobbing*
Kuukou: HYAHAHAHAHAHA!!
Hitoya: Kuukou, you bastard, what are you doing? Are you trying to ruin everything we worked on??
Kuukou: I’m not ruining a damn thing! This curry will be spicy so I can provide a remote kind of training!
Hitoya: Stop fucking around!! There’s gotta be a limit!!
Jyushi: *runs back over* I think there’s more chili pepper powder than ingredients now…!!
Kuukou: Then it’s just right! Now try it.
Jyushi: NO!! I will not be eating!! I absolutely refuse!! Don’t even try me!!
Kuukou: Hey stupid, watch it, that’s dangerous!! Stop fighting me and just—Ahh??
Jyushi: T-The inside of the pot is pitch black……!!
Hitoya: Obviously. Chili peppers burn easily. Haah… Let’s just remake the curry.
Jyushi: But doesn’t that mean we’ll have to mince more meat??
Kuukou: Whatever, I was thinking our “Intensely Spicy Curry Training” was made too halfheartedly anyway!! Time to give it all I got and win this championship!!
#kuko harai#jyushi aimono#hitoya amaguni#bad ass temple#hypmic#hypnosis mic#til that you can make a meat paste at the very least by using a mortar and pestle LOL#the curry pissed me tf off lmao it was so spicy but underneath all that spice was a ridiculously flavourful curry#it's spicy enough that i can tell it's comfortably spicy for people used to eating spice tho!!#habenero is the worst experience with spice i ever had and it wasn't that bad lol but i got the sense it could have been#so i assume jyushi and hitoya talked kuukou down lmao or we didn't want a repeat burnt product lol#i decided to tone down how i usually write bat to try and not show my very obvious bias lol hopefully it worked#i remember slug mentioning sometimes a tl will come off vague in order to not get in the way of future developments#and i actually felt that tling this lmao like when hitoya was telling kuukou there's a limit for everything#i had to choose whether to make this about kuukou and training or kuukou and the chili peppers#the statement itself was a vague warning so my own interpretations of bat were getting in the way probably lol#statements without a clear subject usually default to the person speaking so kuukou saying give it everything and win the championship#is me assuming he's talking about himself and again i'm a little worried my own interpretations of bat are getting in the way#since kuukou's self reliance is blatant but also not if you're casually looking at bat SO IDK LOL I THINK TLING IS HARD#curry tl
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✨"Meet the Artist" ✨
Name: Findus
Age: 26 (29.03)
Zodiac: Aries
Nationality: Norwegian
Orientation: Bi/Asexual
Gender: Non-Binary (they/them)
Education: Masters degree in Archaeology
#not hetalia#meet the artist#ifindus#I'm struggling with my hetalia art so take this instead!#it's been a while since I drew myself#also about time I got a new profile picture#actually very fascinating going through all my all pfp and seeing how my art has evolved over the years 😅#I try not to reveal too much personal information on here - but I think this info is fine 🤔#most of this is already known anyway#except maybe my age??#tbh I should probably have drawn a mitten and not a knitted sweater because I do collect mittens#but at the same time I have a huge collection of knitted sweaters as well so ig it still works ✨#sometime in the future I might draw a series of my fave character from each show I like/follow? 🤔 does that sound like a fun idea/project?#I think that'd be a very diverse bunch of shows and characters 😅
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#when i was first coloring him in he was gonna be golden chinchilla colored but then i was like ehhh jonah magnus should be red/orange but#elias should be gray ...so i just desaturated what i already did instead of recoloring lol but#he is now supposed to be shaded silver lol#but thats why his coat pattern is on the darker side compared to what it *should* be#og elias bouchard coming from an important/roch family and while whole thing with thinking he just *deserves* stuff bc of his upbringing.#etc. -> he is purebred and matches the breed standards etc for a scottish fold of his color#obviously the eye color doesn't matter because. ahaha#i thought elias fit the Scottish fold vibes because: Scottish folds are known for looking sort of like owls and having intense eyes#and the cat body/face type (also present in british shorthairs) to me gives off sort of... unnasumming vibes?#like ahaha yes i am a boring boss who loves paperwork look at how unnasumming i am season 1-2 elias y'know#trying to think of what cat breed jonah would be. and also jon gerry etc you know all the other characters i like#would it be boring to have multiple british shorthairs#i mean..#Michael shelley/distortion is a laperm that's all I know#i didn't particularly care with the personality attributes associated with eliascat because it didn't need to fit his personality on account#of not being his original body. but i do try to keep in mind the best personality/look/etc. cat attributes as a whole for a character#also sometimes get obsessed with jt making historical and geographical sense but then it just limits me greatly to a point im not into it#so i don't care about specific breeds in that respect lol#tma#my art#elias bouchard#the magnus archives#some notes looking back(made it 2 hours ago but still looking back ok..) on it now are that i feel like elias would never choose this breed#for his next bodyhop because of the inherent health issues in scottish folds. I saw the breed was created in like the early 1960s and#assumed that maybe the health issues wouldn't have been common knowledge until later enough for jonah to be unaware of them but actually no#there's legislation about it like 6 years later LOL so jonah would..maybe not make this choice#i guess in the future when drawing i will just make him a British shorthair#my catTMA is simultaneously 'they are just regular cats or like all show cats or something' and 'exact tma plot but as intelligent cats'#LOL its just vague in my mind idk..also maybe jon can be an Abyssinian#ALSO WHAT WAS I THINKING 'jonah may not have been aware about x thing' like did i...did i forget. me 2 hours ago was dumb as rocks
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one time my mom told me that our young neighbors loved our persimmons so much that they decided to plant some trees of their own. so they planted four persimmon trees ☠️
#OH YOU SWEET SUMMER CHILDREN LMAO#we have two trees planted in 80s. they put out conservatively at least 300 persimmons each. maybe more#FOUR PERSIMMON TREES#fuck around and find out of ALL time#<- says the guy who is inheriting a house with 14 different fruit trees on the property#i feel real fear when i think about my future sometimes#not bc i am afraid of growing old. but bc i am afraid of the amount of gardening i will be doing#but like what am i gonna do - cut down the persimmon trees? those trees are my family. all the fruit trees are my family#anyway if any of you are like should i plant 1-4 persimmon trees? NO just COME TO MY HOUSE i will GIVE YOU THEM FOR FREE#fresno oilers.txt#feelin real chatty tonight but i was just at church for 5 hours and am trying to recover from the yearning#so i can get started editing my fth fic#i got stuck in traffic while going to church tho and untangled a motif that was driving me crazy so i'm feeling MUCH better abt it#and we stay silly above it all
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