#someone take away my internet privileges
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I'm thinking Kate and a legitimized Sophie who hide their omega orientations, plus late bloomer omega, thought she was a beta, Penelope. All three are hiding from ABC during an event at Aubrey Hall because Pen unknowingly went into heat, and it causes sympathy pheromones from Kate and Sophie.
Aka the weekend trip to Aubrey Hall that ended in Violet petitioning bullying the clergy for three special licenses.
#idk what this is#someone take away my internet privileges#jokes on me i pay for it#bridgerton#kathony#benophie#polin#alpha/beta/omega au#omegaverse
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I'd like to apologize...
this makes "Where No Man Has Gone Before" sound awfully suggestive
#someone take away my phone#i need internet privileges revoked#star trek#star trek the original series#mr spock#spock#james t kirk#jim kirk#spirk#star trek memes#silly#shitposting#mypost
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Me: *wearing my Repo! jacket*
The they/them making my coffee: does your jacket say Zydrate Anatomy?? it’s really cool.
Me: yes!!! thank you gay barista!!
Them: you’re welcome, gay person!!
Me, five minutes later: *getting gas*
A person with teal hair: I love your jacket!!!
Me: …are you queer?
Them: yup!
Me: fantastic. I have proven that this jacket is a gay magnet. everything is going according to plan >:)
#repo! the genetic opera#the gays have one mode#and that mode is NICE JACKET!!#or NICE BOOTS!!#gay is an inclusive word in my heart#we are all gay deep down#I got railed by a girl and while it may have seemed straight#I assure you I was very gay about it#the gay is in the soul#and in our silly little obsessions#like repo#I just want to peg the grave robber#is that too much to ask#anyway someone take away my internet privileges pls
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Btw, if i ever find out how thin exactly the walls in this house are, i think I'll just about perish
#brought to you by: ✨️self care✨️ and living with the family#it's three am someone take my Internet privileges away
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oh no this thing got sad. it was not supposed to get sad
#lohst.txt#i now keep switching between this fic and my poems#i want to share more of my poems but posting them limits the places i can submit them#a lot of magazines don't take previously published pieces#anyway i need to finish this#its so close#(someone take my late night internet privileges away because i will just come on here and say shit)
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I did NOT reach my goal word count today but I DID start watching a new installment in the real housewives franchise and I read some destiel fanfic and I stressed about a girl not texting me back so I got a lot done
#I didn’t even go to my writing group bc my body was in too much pain#but I wrote like 1200 words which is p good#even tho I’m tryna do nanowrimo which is 1600 a day soooo oops#also someone needs to take the internet away from me#so I spend a lot of time researching my genuine academic interests? ya for sure#but do I also read destiel fanfic and watch real housewives using it? ya for sure!!!#I think it’s doing more harm than good at this point I need to be stripped of my internet privileges for a while#that way I can have more time to stare at the wall and think ‘why hasnt she texted me back’
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Sing Tik Tok Things
You know that tik tok “Untouchable” trend? Just saying that Johnny would absolutely own it as he has three British gang members who would commit murder for him if he asked without a single moment of hesitation.
#sing#sing johnny#sing marcus#sing big daddy#sing stan#sing barry#he would also do the scary dog privileges trend as well#mainly because none of them want to be a video with him#so he makes them the center of his account#i love menace johnny so much#but yeah no they already have committed at least four felonies for him so this would be nothing to them#we love supportive dad and uncles here#hiatus brain go brrrr#someone take my internet away#please i'm driving my friends crazy
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babe I just need u to know that as I sit here now, on my 23rd birthday, the first thing I read to beckon in this new age was liquid gold & I am 🧚satiated🧚 - it is SO good ! thank u 🤍
omg hbd, 🧚satiated🧚!
oh wow look who is throwing you a party! omg they got you a gift, wonder what it is?!
so thoughtful wow 🥹!!
ty for letting me (and the Miller brothers) help you celebrate your bday!
catch ya later,
♥Puddles♥
#a word from puddles#puddles asks#oneshots#double dicking#birthday thots#wholesome without the W#someone needs to take away my internet#and my photoshop privileges#bc I cannot stop lmao
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So sometimes when I get a cool little story idea I will write it down to possibly use later. Usually this ends up just being a sentence that is said, or a mini scene that will happen, and sometimes is like an entire fic outline. My Google docs is full of all kinds of writing prompts I came up with and never expanded on. Anyways I have mostly been focusing on bsd fics and actually following through on my prompts because I want to post content.
At this rate I think I have like three different aromantic Dazai fics/prompts and im like. Wow. I need to stop projecting so hard aha
#crab says words#crab writes fics#why are my aro dazai fics usually atsuzai haa?#is my brain just that needy for qpr atsuzai#i think its because im too scared to write a dazai x poe fic and im too obsessed with romantic soukoku#and those are really the only dazai ships i both like and am comfortable writing#aroace enby dazai propaganda#i will force him to be me fr#hskajskajddj im so silly goofy :D#i need to stop saying things online at 6am after i havent slept and am super sleep deprived....#someone take away my internet privileges for real !!!
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Joseph: I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME?!
Rachel: Babe...
Joseph: You broke my heart, Rachel. I really thought our relationship meant something to you. How could you betray me like that??
Rachel: Joseph, for the last. fucking. time! I can't take off my bra right now!
Joseph: That's not fair! >:,(
Rachel: If you don't shut up, my thighs will do it for you!
Joseph: ....promise?
Rachel: Will you stop complaining?
Joseph: I'd kill God with my bare hands if that means I can get between your legs.
Rachel: Consider this a promise then.
Joseph: Yessss!
#He uh can be a little dramatic sometimes. Especially when he can't have his vitamin B(oobs)#Someone really should take away my internet privileges#Jachel#Piers talks
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I'm absolutely convinced that one of the funniest things you could ever possibly do is if you fuck a virgin and the moment it's in you stopped and went "Got your virginity!" with the same cadence of "Got your nose!"
Anyway to explain why I'm like this both of my last two therapists dumped me (transfered to a different practice) so there's no one to call me on my bullshit that I'll listen to.
#my bullshit#vulgar#this is a joke#dad jokes#someone sedate me#i need sleep#take away my phone#the Internet is a privilege that i do not deserve
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LOGAN FIC REQ!! (i love your messages au smmm btw THEYRE SO GOOD AHH) ok anywayssss
can you pls do logan x super super famous!reader.(preferably an actress but i don't mind any) so both of them are dating but are trying to keep it a secret since they've only been dating for a short amount of time. one night they decide to go on a date but paparazzi was there and it was going VIRAL. reader regrets not double checking if there would be any paps. sooo then everyone starts investigating on logan as the internet does and since everyone doesn't watch f1, they only see logan crashing and blah blah blah so they see him as a "bad driver" and he starts getting A LOT of hate because people think reader deserves better. they also start comparing him to reader's "more better and famous ex". reader and logan take time off social media and people think they broke up until reader releases an instagram post defending him and yeah a lot of fluff and hurt/comfort.
idk if this made sense but pls feel free to change anything!! again i love your work sm 💕‼️
Hiiii, omg thank you so much! Love love LOVE the fic idea and without any further ado- here's the fic, it isn't exactly as the prompt but I hope you love it-
Keep my wife's name OUT YOUR DAMN MOUTH ୨୧ Logan Sargeant x famous! reader
As a celebrity, you don’t often have the privilege of privacy. The cameras seemed to follow you everywhere, from outside your house to the restaurants you ate at and even to private celebrations with your friends and family.
Your last relationship had gone south exactly because of the paparazzi, making assumptions about the seriousness of your relationship and even spreading pregnancy and marriage rumours, scaring the man away.
You had wanted to take it slow, heart broken from your previous relationship but then you met Logan and for the first time in a long time you felt like you could breath, like you could do what you wanted without being judged.
You knew who he was and he knew who you were and that was perfect.
The both of you had spent a perfect week in your villa in Bali, it had been risky but no one caught on, surprisingly.
You thought your luck would continue and you threw causation to the wind, not asking your assistant to check for paparazzi at the sushi restaurant you were going to in Shanghai.
Unfortunately, you were caught just as you were leaving the restaurants waking up to a host of notifications, some good and some gut-wrenching.
Logan on the other hand tried not to throw up, his eyes wide, you could tell he was scared. Would his team drop him? No, no. Why would they? Right? Oh God.
"Logan, Logs, baby are you okay?" You called out, dropping to your knees and cradling his face in your palms.
f1waglife
f1waglife Y/n nation how are we feeling tonight? Logang? How are we? This was definitely not the couple we expected but is this the couple we deserve?
Username OH HELL NAW- WHY IS THIS FLORIDA MAN DATING QUEEN Y/N?????
Username Y/n come home the kids miss you
Username Omg mans is in love
Username Get someone to look at you the way Logan looks at Y/n
You saw some of the comments and while some made you smile, some made you want to slap a bitch, unfortunately, a scandal would not help, so you called up your PR manager, and the post was gone within a minute.
Logan's race had gone sour, with him getting an unfair penalty and points on his licence. The already poor start to your day had turned even worse when you saw Logan tiredly storm into the room collapsing on the bed, burying his face in his pillow.
"What... the..... fuck?" He screamed into the pillow making you smile a little. The small habit he'd picked up from you, screaming into the pillows as a way to think, one that you had picked up from one of the characters you played a long time ago.
"Why do people even care about who's dating who? That's so stupid." He rolled his eyes.
"Don't we binge Keeping Up with the Kardashians every Monday?" You asked.
"That's not the same though-" He paused and switched his phone off, he already didn't have access to his own Instagram, having given access to his manager a long time ago, he now didn't even want to talk to his friends or colleagues many of whom just wanted an autograph from you along with an explanation how he could be with you.
He turned around, pulling the blanket on him, tired from the day.
You pulled up Twitter as a habit but were greeted with a terrible chain of tweets judging every aspect of your relationship and even worse criticizing Logan without even knowing anything about the sport.
"What the fuck-" You cursed out loud, you knew your fanbase was slightly (an underestimation) larger than your boyfriends but how could they call themselves your fans, when you have been a fan of Logan's since his first season in f1? All your co-stars American or not knew your borderline obsession for the man, every race week you'd be posting Williams on your story, how could they still hate on him?
You looked next to you, where your boyfriend was sleeping a small scowl on his pretty face.
PR be damned, he didn't deserve this.
y/nl/nofficial
y/nl/nofficial To anyone who calls themselves my fans and talks shit about my lovely boyfriend, UNFOLLOW ME ASAP. Logan is the kindest, sweetest, most talented man I've had the pleasure to know and he deserves better than the bullshit he gets from some assholes who don't know anything about him. To quote my friend Will: KEEP MY WIFES NAME OUT YOUR DAMN MOUTHS-
username oop sis snapped
username you tell em girl
username LOVE a gf whos rabidly in love with her bf
username now why would y'all try and shame Mother's boyfriend when all she does is post about him for race weekends??
username fr shes been a logan fan before logan fans have been logan fans
Williams We stan a protective gf 😮💨
username admin you'll always be famous
y/nl/nofficial Cant help it he looks really pretty in blue 🥰
username oh she in love love
username shall we start calling him Father?
The way I was struggling to write this fic cause I had to write bad things about Pookie Bear Logie is insane. But- I hope yall like it, please do let me know in the comments or reblogs!!!
#f1#formula 1#logan sargeant#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 x y/n#f1 x female reader#f1 fic#f1 x you#logan sargeant imagine#logan sargeant x reader#logan sargent#anon ask#thank you anon#f1 social media au#f1 smau
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Stupid moments from The Beest Detectives script
#lohst.txt#blocked out last names because I didnt use fake names#🐝#someone take my late night internet privileges away
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too sweet, part 7
but then you wake up for the sunrise
series master list
liked by edwards.73 and others
yourusername: home sweet home💛💙
rutgermcgroarty: the world traveler returns
yourusername: had to bless my fans with my presence
luca.fantilli: correct- fan, singular
dylanduke25: next time you leave take your singular fan with you
markestapa: please he's s so annoying
lhughes_06: everytime i talk to you it's 'i hate michigan and i want to move'
yourusername: could you not expose me on the internet?
lhughes_06: no I find this fun
jackhughes: he's right, you hate michigan
_quinnhughes: really you've never said one nice thing about the state
yourusername: you assholes I hate michigan because none of you guys are here a majority if the time
*liked by lhughes_06, jackhughes, and _quinnhughes*
trevorzegras: well that's adorable
lhughes_06: we just wanted you to admit it for everyone to see
yourusername: i hate all of you
edwards.73: crazy how you've been back for 48 hours and I haven't seen you
yourusername: lies I was at your game
edwards.73: now how i meant it
yourusername: i don't understand elaborate please 🤨😏
edwards.73: you're such a brat you don't need me to elaborate
dylanduke25: could you please take this to your text conversations please? us normal people don't need to see it
markestapa: ^fr we don't want to see it
alexturcotte_: soo when are you coming to visit me?
trevorzegras: or me
yourusername: when i'm not broke
username41: the tension between y/n and ethan in these comments is crazy
username24: so real
username62: they don't even try to hide anymore
liked by taylorrose and others
yourusername: a compilation of sorts
taylorrose: you love a good compilation
yourusername: i really do
taylorrose: also the second phot MAAM
yourusername: what? something wrong?
taylorrose: currently shaking my head and laughing at you
yourusername: good
rutgermcgroarty: you two are disgusting
yourusername: rut we talked about this you can't be jealous just because I won't date you
rutgermcgroarty: you=annoying
yourusername: love you too
*liked by rutgermcgroarty*
markestapa: rut's right you two make me vomit
luca.fantilli: can't disagree sorry y/n
dylanduke25: don't be sorry, they're nasty
_quinnhughes: the second photo?? tell him his hand is too high
yourusername: i'll pass, but thanks for the suggestions
_quinnhughes: you drive me crazy
yourusername: happy to be of service
trevorzegras: i just know the siblings groupchat is going off rn
yourusername: i'm going to mute them
trevorzegras: then they'll show up to michigan
yourusername: you're so right
username24: please she's so lucky
username56: REAL like look at those hands
*liked by yourusername*
edwards.73: i think i've seen those jeans before
yourusername: i wear them at least once a week dumbass
edwards.73: it's it sad that you own enough clothes to fill at least 3 closets and you wear the same 3 things
yourusername: okay no need to call me out
edwards.73: and those 3 outfits barely even consist of clothing from your closet
edwards.73: it's clothing you've stolen from someone else
yourusername: i'm going to take away your commenting privileges
edwards.73: right i'm sure
Sibling Groupchat
Luke and Y/N messages
tags: @love4ldr
#ethan edwards#rutger mcgroarty#jack hughes#luke hughes#quinn hughes#trevor zegras#ethan edwards x y/n#umich hockey#ethan edwards x reader#mark estapa#luca fantilli#dylan duke#nhl hockey#nhl imagine
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There is No Pavement, My Love
Professor Love makes an observation, Professor Riley misinterprets it.
"I'd like to add your book to my syllabus." Love says leaning against Ghost's desk. He glances up from his grading, his eyes darting between the way she pushes her tits out and the way she smiles, before returning his attention to his work.
He'd worried about this after the conference. He already had enough requests rotting in his inbox for reprintings of his book. The whole thing was more trouble than it was worth, raised more heartache than he ever wanted it to. It was better left buried with the rest of his past.
"No."
"Why not?" He can hear her pouting, he stuffs down the smile it threatens to raise in him. How is it one woman can be such a balm for his melancholy?
"Never find enough copies," he circles a glaring comma splice and underlines a misquote, "it's out of print."
"Well then it's a good thing someone uploaded all of it to the internet in pdf form." Love wiggles in her seat, attempting to draw his attention again. Ghost gives a quick glance, his eyes fixing on the strained buttons on her shirt. Weak. He is a weak, weak, man. Always has been, that's exactly why he's in this mess in the first place.
"Cheeky little thing aren't you." He looks away, but his voice is thick and labidinous. The soft noise Love lets out make him think it's not an unwelcome tone. Cheeky indeed. She leans a little more heavily against his desk.
"What about just the forward?"
Ghost sets down his pen, taking off his spectacles and laying them neatly beside it. He knits his fingers together and rests his hands heavily on the papers he'd been grading.
"Why do you want to teach my book?" He asks, leaning to match her pose.
"Mostly just the forward," Love amends. Ghost shakes his head with a smile, drags his teeth over the scar splitting his lip before he can look at her again.
"Why do you want to teach my forward?" He asks again.
"Its a love letter."
Ghost freezes, his brain running through every word of his book looking for anything that could be interpreted as something so... romantic.
"Explain," he grunts, crossing his arms over his chest as he sits back in his chair. Love blinks, her expression softening in a way that makes Ghost feel like he's dying. His heart clenches in his chest. He squeezes his bicep, his fingers tight to keep himself from pulling her over the desk. If he could kiss that sad softness out of her smile he would. She laces her fingers together.
"My mum lived through Hell every day of her marriage to my father, I wish I could rest comfortably knowing she's somewhere better, but then I wouldn't be here, and neither would you." Love recites, and some long dormant crack in Ghost's chest aches. Her voice is softer, when she speaks again, and that hurts all the worse, "You spend 250 pages talking about grief and our comfort in the afterlife; talking about your time in the service, and losing people. Just because you wanted to make sense of your mum's death. How is that not a love letter?"
Ghost swallows the lump that threatens to choke him. He fixes his eyes on hers, hard and unyielding even when he can see sincerity shining through her expression. He can't stand it. Tenderness is a privilege, she should never assume such a softness about him.
"It's a book," He tells her firmly, "one that's better off buried."
"It's part of you," She tries, "an important one."
"If you're done teasin' me,"
"I'm not-
"You can get out," Ghost powers through her objection, nods towards the door. Love opens her mouth and her raises a brow, "Go on, be cute for someone else."
There's a hurt in her eyes when she closes her mouth, her lips drawing together tight. It hurts as much as Ghost thought it would, but he can't have her poking around at scars like this. There's too much about her he should have nipped in the bud, too much he's let her get away with, too much he's deluded himself into hoping for, she can't have this too. She can't think he's more than he is.
She stands, and shuts the door tight behind her.
And it's worse somehow.
#simon ghost riley#x oc#cod x oc#ghost mw2#simon riley#simon riley x oc#ghost x oc#mw2 ghost#ghost cod#ghost mwii#professor!Ghost#professor au#is it really a slow burn if it doesn't hurt a little bit?#oc: love#I'll fix it in the next one#Ghost is tender about his trauma but who isn't?
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It is necessary to escape the routine sometimes!
F. Toji x Ftm! Reader
Warnings: This is a trans man/boy centered post, but you (fem, gn, and non-trans) can still safely interact with the post. Toji and reader were not a romantic couple before reader turned 18. It's more for comfort, made especially to give those silly smiles.
Summary: Naturally, every rich man needs a heir. And it’s obvious that it wouldn’t be any different for someone who works directly in the Japanese government. That’s where the problem lies. Being the vice president of a country and doing so much for the poorest and most needy people, while taking away unnecessary privileges from rich people, makes his head a target and his family as well.
When [Name] was born, his mother fell ill due to blood loss, and soon died from complications in the surgery that was supposed to save her (it is important to mention that, after her death, a bounty on the woman’s head was announced in the deepest areas of the internet, It is not known whether the mission was accepted). This generated extreme fear in the man and, as a result, he ended up becoming extremely protective of the inheritance that the woman in his life left for him.
All of this only got worse when [Name] revealed he was a trans boy at 15 years old. The reason why the vice president of Japan was even more scared (thankfully) is not because he is trans, but because of what people would do if he found out. Think about it, if people already wish the boy’s death just because he was his son, imagine if they found out that [Name] is a trans boy?
Of course, the man did the impossible to erase [Name’s] old image, to pass him off as a cis boy. Still, it’s difficult to stop the rumor from spreading.
That’s where Toji Fushiguro comes in.
It's curious to think that Toji, the sorcerer killer, could actually be tasked with protecting someone. But that’s exactly what happened, [Name]’s father actually put Toji as the boy’s bodyguard. And this went on for 6 years.
“Hey! Can you stop pulling me, I have legs and they are very functional!”
[Name] says, only to continue being pulled towards some place unknown to him thus far. He didn’t understand anything, and Toji didn’t want to explain what he was doing either.
Finally, the two stop in front of a house. It wasn’t ugly, it just looked like it wasn’t well looked after from the outside.
“Huh? Is this your house?”
“Yes, and I want to introduce you to my son... What was his name...?"
Toji says the last part quietly, but it still gets a low laugh from [Name], who thinks the older man was just joking. Even he knew Megumi's name because Toji said it himself. And after all, who would forget their own child’s name?
As soon as the tallest one opens the door to the house, [Name] is faced with a heart-wrenching sight. There was Toji Fushiguro’s son, eating snacks for breakfast in complete silence and alone, in na environment clearly not prepared for a child
As soon as [Name] sees this, a slap is landed on the head of the man next to him, who moans softly in pain. The slap was weak, but Toji didn’t want to be so mean and say he didn’t feel any pain from the impact.
“How dare you leave a poor little child in these unsanitary conditions?!”
“It’s not my fault if I have to spend the whole day with you. Besides, the kid knows his way around, you see?”
Megumi turns around, looking at his father with disinterest, but then looking at the boy next to him. This time, he seemed more interested, and got up to walk towards the boy.
“... You’re the guy he talks about so much, right? Cool. Nice to meet you.”
Little Fushiguro says, surprising [Name]. It’s a lot of education for just one child (especially for a child who is the son of a man like Toji).
“Nice to meet you too! You're very polite, right?"
When [Name] goes to shake the boy’s hand, he realizes that although it may not seem like it, Toji probably takes care of the boy, as he shows no signs of being thin beyond what is healthy.
"Tell me something, little Megumi...Does Toji take care of you or just leave you to your own devices?"
Megumi shakes [Name]'s hand, and shrugs, indicating that it was a little of both. Obviously Toji pays for food and a few other things, but Megumi is the one who cleans the house and already acts like an adult.
"I'm very busy, if you must know."
"That doesn't give you the right to leave him to his own devices."
"You're really just here to judge, ugh."
Before [Name] could counter argue, he chose to remain silent. He holds Megumi's hand and prepares to tidy up the house and make good, dignified food, since it seems unlikely that Megumi has eaten anything healthy these past few weeks.
"Megumi, let's tidy up this whole house. And you Toji, we'll talk about it later."
Toji seemed to be both unsatisfied and happy. Unsatisfied because he couldn't imagine being scolded like that, and happy to see his son and his boyfriend getting along so well. He sits on the couch as he watches the two boys tidy up the house (and no, he doesn't plan on helping).
And speaking of a boyfriend... He would never have imagined that he would date someone of the same gender as him. He never even considered being with a man, but destiny can always surprise. Everything has been so peaceful after he and [Name] started dating, he can just sit on a couch and watch a good television show while cuddling with his boyfriend. [Name] actually managed to get Toji over the loss of his wife, which is a miracle.
While he is absorbed in his own thoughts, Megumi and [Name] finish tidying everything up. This made for a good few hours, and by the end, both the youngest and oldest boy were dead tired. Megumi goes to his own room and throws himself on the bed, while [Name] throws himself into Toji's lap.
"... That was so tiring... You could have helped!"
"You didn't call me, I didn't think I needed to help with anything."
The man says, as he gently squeezes one of [Name]'s cheeks with his left hand, and with his right hand he squeezes his waist. The smell of cleaning products on [Name]'s clothes were incredibly good, and Toji didn't even remember buying them. He buries his face in the crook of the boy's neck, eliciting a laugh from [Name].
"Of course we needed your help! But it's okay, the food is up to you, go make it soon because your son is hungry. And try to take good care of him, unless you want me to slap you again."
[Name] says, as he gets off Toji's lap. He wanted Toji to make the food so that at least Megumi could eat something his father lovingly made. Well, he still doesn't know that Toji is terrible at cooking.
And everything goes like this. [Name] going to take a shower, only to almost faint when he felt big hands on his waist, Toji burning the food and [Name] having to redo everything together with Megumi, Megumi accidentally revealing that he likes watching Barbie movies, and in the end, everyone watching Barbie in the living room.
Sounds like a perfect day, don't you think?
#Spotify#jujutsu kaisen#male reader#jjk#ftm reader#jjk toji#toji fushiguro#toji x reader#toji x male reader#jjk megumi#megumi fushiguro
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