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lionlena · 11 months

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Dancing With Your Ghost (JavierPeñaxghost!reader) Part VII

Summary: You are a ghost (sort of) and you don’t remember what happened to you. You only know your name and you feel that something bad has happened to you. The only person who sees you and hears you is Javier, so you don’t leave him because you believe he’ll help you. That he will solve the mystery of what happened to you.

Warnigs: the reader is a ghost, mentions of death, angst,descriptions of severe wounds, blood, violence, attempted rape… And also sadness, anxiety, little smut but later

A/N: Title inspired by this song

Part VII

After a week in the hospital, Javier had enough and decided to leave the hospital of his own accord. He couldn't just lie idle in bed waiting for you to show up. He wanted to start looking for you. He was still weak and limping from the pain in his hip, but he didn't care. You were his priority.

The day before, he had asked Daniel to bring him clothes from home, a badge, and a gun, and to park his car in the hospital parking lot. He accepted a bag of strong painkillers from the doctor and ignored the advice to rest a lot. He didn't have time for that.

He got into the car, hissing in pain as he tried to find a comfortable position. He knew the ride would be a nightmare, but he couldn't ask anyone for help. How would he explain that he had to stop in different streets and look around for a ghost? He was about to start the car when he saw the map lying on the dashboard and his first instinct was to tear it up, crumple it, tear it to pieces, and then he came to his senses. He quickly unfolded the map, grabbed a pen, and marked the center of the circle.

"Fuck me!" quickly got out of the car and went back to the hospital.

He walked over to the ward nurse, hoping for luck, and showed his badge: "DEA agent, I'm looking for someone. Her name is Y/N."

The woman looked at him carefully. "Anything more?"

Javier described your appearance, and when he had finished, the nurse replied, "I think I know who it might be. Please follow me."

His heart was beating like crazy, and he was almost out of pain. The air escaped from his lungs as he entered a small room with a single bed. He stood completely stunned, staring at your face. He found you! He finally found you... Or rather, your body.

"You were looking for her?"

The nurse's question barely reached him. All he could do was nod.

"So, I don't think she's going to help you with your investigation. She's been like this for over two months now. It's a kind of coma, but the doctors don't know exactly what's wrong with her. She breathes on her own, and her pupils react to light, but otherwise, she won't wake up. "

Javier took a hesitant step forward and said, "It's not an investigation... I know her. She's my friend. I've been looking for her."

The woman noticed how broken he was and put a hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry."

He nodded and walked over to you, gently stroking your hand. Without taking his eyes off your face, he asked, "What happened?"

"Oh, she was in the wrong place at the wrong time. There was a police chase after some thug. One of the cars tried to avoid hitting the police car and swerved onto the sidewalk, and this poor thing was just there. The car didn't hit her very hard, but enough that she hit her head on the ground and lost consciousness. Rescuers were unable to wake her up."

Javier's heart fell to his feet. It was his fault. It's all because of him. He wanted the earth to swallow him up.

"Can... Can I sit with her?" he asked in a trembling voice.

"Of course. It will do her good. The voice of loved ones always works well. Unfortunately, she has no one and her boyfriend..."

Javier snapped his head up and looked at the nurse. "Her boyfriend? What about him?"

"He's been here maybe twice and found it too hard for him," she snorted.

He felt furious with your boyfriend. He didn't know him, but he already hated him. But he hated himself even more. He ran his hand over your cheek and whispered, "I'm sorry."

The nurse pulled up a chair for him and sympathetically said, "I'll leave you. You can stay here as long as you like."

Javier dropped into a chair and grabbed your hand, placing a gentle kiss on your skin. He was finally able to touch you, his wish came true, but it was a nightmare. He once heard a saying that "when the gods want to punish you, they make your dreams come true". Now he understood it completely.

His dream came true and it was torture. He didn't know how to wake you up. He didn't know if your ghost had returned to your body. He felt he should be looking for your spirit, but at the same time, he was terrified of leaving your body. He buried his face in your hand. "Y/N, baby. What should I do?"

Javier lost track of time. He didn't know how long he sat with you. An hour, two, maybe three. He just couldn't take his eyes off you. He watched your every breath and felt the panic that each of those breaths would be your last. Finally, he decided he had to do something. He already had your body, he needed to find the ghost. He squeezed your hand tightly and said, "Y/N, I'll come back to you, I promise."

Leaving the hospital was harder than he thought. Each step that took him away from you seemed harder to take. By the time he got to the car, his hip hurt so much that he swallowed two painkillers and lit a cigarette. He rubbed his nose with his thumb and took a deep breath muttering, "Get a grip."

He had to find your ghost, so the first place he went was of course your "X" starting point. Unfortunately, he didn't find you there, so he went back to his apartment. He looked in every room calling for you but without success. He was so desperate that he even went to the place where he almost died. But, he didn't find you there either. He finally decided to go to the embassy and check out his office. He didn't find you.

And just as he feared, his appearance at work had consequences. As soon as Chris saw him, he immediately asked: "Boss, are you back? We have new information."

He sighed and nodded his head. He couldn't say he was there just because he was looking for a ghost.

And so for the next three days, Javier Peña was like a ghost himself. He moved between the embassy and the hospital. He only came to his apartment to take a quick shower and put on fresh clothes. He barely slept and was still taking too many painkillers.

Sometimes he just dozed with his head resting on your bed. He was so determined to spend every free moment with you that even the nurses gave up trying to chase him away and let him stay the night.

Javier was just sitting by your bed holding your hand. When his phone rang, he sighed heavily and picked it up muttering "Peña."

"Boss, we need you." Chris's voice came from the other end.

"I'll be there in half an hour," he replied and ended the call.

He stood up reluctantly, still holding your hand. He leaned over and kissed your hand. Then he ran his fingers lightly over your cheek and whispered, "Don't go anywhere without me, okay? I'll find a way to wake you up, I promise."

Javier had to do his best not to think about you while he was working. Fortunately, even when he did, his coworkers thought it was still the result of his wounds and did not ask him about it.

As he drove to the hospital in the late afternoon, he began to think about his job. Has he lost his motivation? NO. He wanted to catch all the godfathers of the Cali Cartel. Yes, he still wanted to, but at the same time, he felt it would be easier to find the tooth fairy.

Suddenly one thought hit him. Fairy! Spells, magic... Why hadn't he thought of that before. He abruptly changed direction and hit the accelerator?

Curandera appeared in front of him after he knocked furiously on the door..

"Agent Peña?"

"You have to help me. I found her. She's in a coma in the hospital, but... I don't know where her ghost is."

The woman frowned. "I don't understand. You said she was with you all the time."

He sighed heavily and rubbed his temples. "Something happened..." he mumbled. "She entered the body of the man who tried to kill me."

"I told you that..."

"I know!" he growled. "But she did it to save me. When I woke up in the hospital, she wasn't there, but... I found her, she's still alive."

Silvaria began to shake her head. "Maybe you're the only reason she's still alive."

"What do you mean?"

"She sacrificed herself for you, she didn't do it for fun or profit. And she's bound to you."

Javier took a step toward her. "Okay, but can this somehow help bring her ghost back?"

"Your presence will certainly help, but..." She stopped and looked at him concerned. "You must know that bringing a ghost by force has consequences."

He felt his whole body tense. "What?"

"Maybe she won't remember anything. She won't remember that she was a ghost, that she met you, and... She won't remember how she felt about you."

Javier snorted. "She felt nothing for me."

"Really?" She eyed him. "The fact that you're standing here alive in front of me says otherwise."

He wiggled his fingers restlessly and shook his head. "It doesn't matter. It'll be better this way. She doesn't need to remember what an asshole I was. It'll be better for her."

The woman sighed and shook her head resignedly. "I'll prepare everything and we can do it today."

Despite Javier's concerns, it turned out that Silvaria entered the hospital without any problems. The nurses were not at all surprised to see her, and the woman explained to him that the relatives of the sick often called her. But, when they entered your room, Javier closed the blinds and put a chair under the door, for sure that nobody disturb them. He watched carefully as the woman drew symbols around the bed with chalk.

"I need a strand of your hair," she said.

Javier shrugged. "Take all you want. Just help her."

She went to him with the scissors and cut one of the curls at the back of her head. She tossed a strand of hair into a small linen bag and placed it on your chest. Then she grabbed your left hand.

"Stand to her right and take her hand with one hand and mine with the other."

He sighed heavily and muttered, "I can't believe I'm doing this."

She gave him a reproachful look. "You used to not believe in ghosts, and now you're begging me to bring one, so..."

"Okay," he groaned and did, as she told him.

"Close your eyes and say her name in your mind."

He closed his eyes and concentrated on his task. At the same time, Silvaria spoke some words, but he did not recognize a single one, so he stopped listening to her. He kept repeating in his mind, "Y/N. Y/N come back."

Just when he started to think it was all stupid and pointless, it happened. Suddenly a current kicked him and he jumped backward. He opened his eyes and saw that Silvaria had also released your hand and was standing next to the bed, panting heavily.

"It worked?" He asked.

"She was far in the void, but..."

They heard your moan and they both looked at you.

You felt like you were trying to get out of the tar. Your body felt numb. You struggled to open your eyes. It was so hard but you finally did it. Memories slowly came back to you. The sound of sirens, the scream of people, and the impact... Blood? Your hands are covered in blood. NO.

"Where am I..." your voice was hoarse.

"You are in the hospital" you heard a male voice. "You had an accident and you were in a coma."

You looked at him and blinked your eyes in surprise. His face seemed familiar, but you didn't know how you knew him.

"Are you a doctor?" you asked in a tired voice.

He shook his head and backed away quickly, saying, "I'll call the nurses."

The woman who stayed with you patted your hand and said, "Calm down, little birdie, everything will be fine."

You nodded your head, but you felt a strange sadness and fear.

Javier walked quickly down the corridor. He had to leave the hospital as soon as possible. He needed to smoke, find a bar and drink something strong.

"Agent Peña!"

He stopped and looked annoyed at Silvaria.

"What?"

"Tell her the truth. I will help you and confirm your words."

Javier laughed dryly. " Oh, really? I'm supposed to tell her that It was my fault that, she was a ghost, because I let chase for thug through the crowded streets of Colombia. I'm supposed to tell her how I hurt her. No." He shook his head. "The truth is, she's better off without me. She has a chance at happiness now. I'm not going to take that away from her."

The woman grabbed his hand and he looked at her surprised. "Didn't you ever wonder why only you saw her? Why was she connected to you? Maybe it wasn't because of the accident, but something much deeper. A soul's connection that even death could not part."

Javier pulled away sharply, pulling his hand out of her grip. "Soulmates?" The woman nodded. "Please, leave these fairy tales for naive customers. We're done."

He turned and heard Silvaria say, "You think you're saving her, but you're hurting her... and yourself!"

You felt dizzy and lost. Your boyfriend Michael wasn't there, but you felt he wasn't the one you missing. It was a strange feeling, but when you closed your eyes you saw warm brown eyes. The rest of the face was blurry, but those eyes. You missed someone, but you didn't know who.

You never got the chance to know me

Packed it up and crossed the state

You left behind more than memories

Now when I sleep I'm only dreaming of your face

You never got the chance to hold me

I learned to love your selfish way

I still believe in you, and in this burning room

I'll suffer through the pain

Oh no, got me low, how you gonna leave like that?

Oh no, got me low, gone and I want you back

Oh no, down so low, feeling like I'm under attack

Oh no, where did you go? You're gone and I want you

SYML - Leave Like That (feat. Jenn Champion)

A/N: Well, I warned you all that before there's a happy ending, we'll suffer... Poor Javier thinks he's not good enough for the reader 💔 😢

Part VI

Part VIII

Taglist: @aestheticangel612 @kittenlittle24 @hxpburn76 @creedslove @ranahx @yyiikes @fuglyputa24

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfiction #javier pena #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena x reader #javier pena and you #poor baby #ghost!reader #angst #so much sadness #narcos season 3

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whump-protocol · 2 years

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Helpless

The premise is that an enemy captures Keith, injects him with a slow-acting poison, and tells him he’ll get the antidote if he lures the paladins into a trap. Instead, Keith goes back and warns them, at the potential cost of his own life.

And has a heartbreaking conversation with his husband.

This is not a fluffy snippet. Please don’t read this unless you want dark and somewhat despairing. It’s also incomplete because I hurt myself writing it.

It's now complete (as best as I can manage) and it broke my heart.

Keith doesn’t even know the name of the Galra resistance leader who poisoned him. All he remembers is a grating voice telling him about a slow-acting poison running through his veins.

“Don’t worry, I have the antidote, but you’ll have to earn it.” The asshole laughs. “I’m going to let you escape, and I want you to lead your team back here. Once I’ve finished with them, you’ll get the antidote. You have three cycles. Deal?”

The Blade doesn’t even hesitate. “Deal.”

He ends up in a broken single-person flier at the nearest coalition base with coordinates he’s supposed to share with the rest of the paladins. Instead, they get on a video call, and he’s up-front about the whole ordeal. He knows he can’t avoid discussing the consequences, but in his mind, protecting the team comes first.

“It’s an ambush, nothing else. The leaders aren’t even there.” He can see Kolivan in the background, muttering to himself.

“And they let you escape?” Lance asks because of course he does.

“They said they gave me something.” Keith doesn’t elaborate. “It doesn’t matter. What does is that my ship came from their actual base. Its flight plans and navigation are scrambled to hell and back, but maybe Pidge can do something with them.”

“Already on my way,” says the bright-eyed engineer, “and I can tinker with it remotely while en route.”

“Gave you something?” Shiro asks slowly.

At this moment, the admiral is aboard the Atlas and parked somewhere around Earth. He’s ferrying Allura and Lance back to New Altea, and it’s almost time for their scheduled departure. Keith doesn’t exactly relish the upcoming conversation, but he doesn’t dwell on it either.

“He claimed it was deadly but slow. All I know.” The Blade nods to the door. “Medics took a blood sample in case they can figure out what it is.”

“And if they don’t?”

Keith shrugs. “Something, something honor. They will. Or I might get lucky. Or not. Regardless, none of you are stepping into a fucking trap setup by literal madmen on my behalf.”

Kolivan pings him privately about a debriefing. If his lifespan will be counted in hours, possibly complete with mental decline, they need to get as much information out of his head as physically possible in the meantime. He’s not relishing this part, either.

He shakes his head. “I need to talk to Kolivan. I know this is hard.” Keith takes the tone of a leader, the one he fucking hates. “I will speak with all of you later, I’m sure.”

He’s not looking forward to the friendly interrogation he’s about to walk into, but there’s just no time. It’s all necessary for the Blades to figure out the next steps. Kolivan’s on the other line, ready to grill him for as long as he breathes, presumably, so they can take down another separationist cell.

But all Keith wants is Shiro’s comforting warmth in his arms, and he can’t have that across the space of the universe.

Later, after the debriefing is done, Keith calls Shiro directly and asks for a private connection. He doesn’t know what to say, but silence doesn’t appear to be an option. Not when he has a dozen unread messages, and more missed calls than he dares to think about it.

He’s also married to this man, and he can’t avoid his husband for long.

“Keith!” It’s a bellow, and maybe he deserves that. “What the actual fuck?”

“Sorry.”

“I love you, Atlas and I are on our way, so you… better be there when we land.” Shiro’s expression is caught somewhere between righteous anger and endless fear. “Stars above, what happened?”

Keith doesn’t think Shiro wants another mission debrief. “I don’t know. I was careful, followed the protocol to the letter, it was supposed to be a diplomatic engagement. Blades don’t fuck up like this.”

“Shit, baby, I know. I know you. You’re not careless, and you don’t miss red flags.”

“Yeah, so…”

“Do you think they were telling the truth?”

Keith nods hesitantly and chews on his lip. “They injected me with something. I heard them whispering something about how they’ve seen this shit fuck up Galra twice the size. So, probably.”

“Fuck.” Shiro paces his living quarters like a lion trapped in a cage.

“Shiro…” Keith’s voice comes out soft and the words catch on his tongue. “I love you. I always have and always will. If I don’t get to say it again.”

“Don’t! Please, Keith.”

Keith can’t promise not to die, not when he didn’t set the timetable. The Blade feels tears burning in the corners of his eyes. He’s hollow inside like reality hasn’t quite settled in. He knows he’s dying, and understands rationally that his body is sick, but emotionally he’s still catching up.

“I miss you.”

“We’ll be there in just under three cycles.”

Neither of them mentions that it will be too late, that the cold equations of space travel and living bodies don’t lie.

“I’ll see you when you get here,” Keith offers, thinking that perhaps pretending for another five minutes that everything is fine is good enough.

Shiro looks downright horrified. “No. Keith, not, that’s not what I meant. I would rather talk to you for as long as have than sit here. I just…” He sobs. “I’ve known a lot of helplessness in life, and none of it felt like this.”

“I wish you were here.”

“What about the space wolf?”

“He’s with mom on a rescue mission, and they’re still trying to get ahold of them. On account of… you know.”

“Are you OK? Do you feel sick?” Shiro asks.

“Not yet, at least not any worse than when I got here.” That was already a flavor of awful, bruised, battered, and dehydrated.

“You should lie down. Rest. Shower. Take care of yourself.”

Keith is definitely looking forward to all of those. They’ve assigned him a room with a private restroom, small mercy that, and he plans on not letting it go to waste. “You, too.”

“Just don’t hang up, OK?”

Keith looks down at what remains of his tattered uniform and starts stripping out of it. Shiro has seen him naked plenty before, and the new bruises are what they are.

“Yeah, OK. Of course. I’m here. How was the peace accord renewal whatever it was?”

Shiro laughs through his tears, and it’s dark and agonizing. “More bullshit in one day than I usually see in months. I’m surprised Lance didn’t punch anyone given how the ambassadors behaved around his wife.”

Keith shakes his head in sympathy. “Thank goodness it’s over then.”

“For all involved,” his husband agrees. “Are you… going to say goodbye to the others?”

“I feel like I kind of should, you know?”

“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, Keith.”

“I know.” He takes his PADD to the bathroom with him and starts the shower running. “But… closure will help them more than it’s going to help me, and I want that for them.”

“Don’t you dare say goodbye to me!”

Keith smiles and closes his eyes. “It’s going to be all right, Shiro. No matter what happens, you’re going to be all right. I know it.”

“Not without you,” Shiro mutters as his husband steps into the shower and shudders with pain.

Keith sleeps fitfully for a few hours and wakes in pain. It’s a new, dull ache that covers his whole body in a way no bruise ever has — the poison, if he has to guess. His mind feels like he’s swimming through a fog, and it takes a few minutes to get his bearings.

Still at the Coalition base, still safe, still… alive.

Shiro’s already calling him like he knows Keith is awake. “How’re you feeling?” are the first words out of his mouth.

Keith hunts his nightstand for a bottle of water. “Not great.”

“You look like you didn’t get any sleep.”

“I think I dozed. Bad dreams.” Keith drinks water and sighs. He feels fatigued despite the nap, his limbs heavy. “How’d you know I was awake?”

“I might’ve called in a favor to get access to your vitals.”

“Nice use of expensive technology.”

“Shut up. You should go to medical if you’re not feeling well.”

“And do what? Everything hurts. Them handing me pain meds won’t solve the problem, and my head already feels like cotton candy.” He shrugs and lies back down. “Talking to you is nicer.”

"Keith, let them help."

"If they can find an antidote, I'm sure I'll be the first to know. Have you slept?"

Keith's husband doesn't lie. "No. Just sitting here, thinking about you. About our wedding. Remember Kosmo nearly eating the damn wedding rings?"

"Far too well. 'Bad wolf,' never sounded more appropriate."

"And then the honeymoon. I didn't think the Garrison would let us leave for long enough to actually enjoy it."

The Blade chuckles. "I still don't know what Pidge told them to get them off our backs. I'm glad she did. I think those were the best two weeks of my life."

Tears stream down Shiro's face and Keith wishes nothing more than he could hold the man he loves, could wipe those tears away. They'd gone camping together, drove across a country, marveled at the night sky in each other's arms. Keith only wishes for more time, more chances to make happy memories. He looks down at the wedding ring, dangling on a chain around his neck alongside his dog tags.

He hopes both make it to Shiro if he doesn't.

"I love you," he says into the silence. "You were like a brother to me, when I was a kid and desperately needed someone in my corner. And then you were an unwavering friend, a leader. I don't think we would have survived the war without you. But most of all, I treasure your love. I don't know where I'd be without it, without you."

"Keith... I... More than anything in the world, in the universe. I love you, too."

"I'm tired," Keith admits, eyes fluttering closed.

"Rest easy," Shiro prompts him just as another call comes in and a familiar face appears on the screen.

Later, while Keith is once again dozing, Shiro is plotting a painful demise for the ones responsible. He will find them and end them in ways that the galaxy is unlikely to ever forget.

And if he has his way, Shiro will do it with his husband by his side.

#Voltron #Fanfiction #keith (voltron)#shiro (voltron)#whump #so much sadness #impending death #hopeful ending

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