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formulafootball66 · 1 year

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Promoting

a/n: hello! this is my very first fic! criteria is welcome, but please be nice! pairing: neymar x reader warnings: language and slightly mature at the end. word count: 1100 enjoy!

I really don’t want to be here.

But I had no other choice, my work forced me to be here. Due to the success of my movie in Brazil, I had to go for some kind of event. Of course, where there are events there are after parties, and where there are parties there are potential connections. I’m here for that last purpose.

I’m not doing a good job. I have only spoken to the bartender yet, and I’m pretty sure he didn’t recognize me. The drink sure did help with the mood.

There is nothing wrong with this party, the lights are maybe a bit too bright, but still. The purple lightning made it impossible to even see your drink. One thing you were able to notice, is the smell. It smells so horrible. Sweaty bodies, strong alcohol and awful food.

The worst part of this place? I don’t speak a word Portuguese and I have zero friends here. So I do what a girl has to do: get another drink.

While walking to the bar, I make sure to check the floor. God forbid that slip over some trash and someone takes a picture of it. So I make sure to focus and dodge all of it.

I was a little bit too focused on not slipping, cause I crashed into someone. “Oh shit! I’m so sorry!” I say embarrassed and I look up. In front of me stands the most beautiful man I’ve ever laid eyes on.

And, oh my God, now I recognize him. Shit. I just bumped into Neymar Jr. The Neymar Jr. The man who was is magazine every week, either with a hot a photoshoot or a rumor that he’s dating a new girl.

“Sem problemas, lindihna,” he says and his voice is just as attractive as himself. I don’t know what the last thing he said means, but I’m pretty sure that he said that it’s not a problem.

“Uh, sorry again!” I mutter, because, man, I want to get away from this awkward conversation. I walk away, but he grabs my arm. “What’s your name again, beautiful?”

“I’m Y/N. And you are Neymar.” I say, lowkey flabbergasted. Hello? He wanted to know my name? He called me beautiful? Neymar has still a hold on my arm. I see that he notices too, because he let’s go of me. Instead he grabs my hand, leads me to the dancefloor area again.

He pulls me closer, hands that have snuck on my hips. His face gets closer. I can feel his hot breath on my skin. His eyes are gleaming mischievous. I feel my heart pounding in my chest. How many times in your life do you get a chance to be so close with an insanely hot man?

“Yeah, are you a fan?” He whispers in my ear, sending shivers over my body. Oh god, what was he doing to me? I only met him like 2 minutes ago.

While my mind wanders, my body knows exactly what I want. I feel hot everywhere. It’s probably a combination of the busy crowd and his body close to mine.

“Kind of. At home we watch a lot football. I think I saw you play a couple of times.” I’m really trying my hardest not to make this awkward. I must admit, I don’t really know Neymar as a player, nor as a person, obviously.

Meanwhile his arms lay loosely around my waist. His right hand creeping down a little.

He chuckles. “So, what brought you here in such short skirt You’re on a mission?”

I blush and look down. I really should’ve worn something else. Now he probably thinks I’m just some easy girl. Then again, I try to gaslight myself into thinking that I don’t care what Neymar thinks or says about me.

“No, definitely not. I had a movie come out. I’m here from promotion, but it’s not really working.” I don’t mention that I’m too scared to talk to people and that I should actually get that third drink.

“Ah, an actress.”

“Yeah, something wrong with that?” I ask kind of defensive.

“The opposite actually.” He says flashing a cocky smirk.

A new songs comes up and it’s some song of the Weeknd. He begins to sway me around. Holy shit. He wants to dance. I’m not a particularly bad dancer, but it’s definitely not one of my talents. But the way he moves, the pure confidence in all what he does, makes me lose it to rhythm too.

“You know, I think I can solve your promotion problems,” he says seductively. His hazel brown eyes looking in mine and locking contact.

I was intrigued, because everything was better than what I was doing. “Oh yeah? Please, tell me.” I say, without breaking the eye contact.

“I can’t tell you, only show you.”

“Show me then.” I say with sudden confidence. His hands lift your chin and his thumb runs over your bottom lip. His other hand cups my jaw and he finally breaks the eye contact to look at my lips. He looks me in the eyes again to asks for permission, maybe? I nod and it happened all in a flash.

And all of sudden his lips are touching mine. I do not kiss back immediately, out of pure shock. The kiss, that was gentle at first, was getting more intense, he kissed me harder. He also gave my ass a little squeeze. That made me gasp and therefore he had the chance to slip his tongue into my mouth.

He tastes like expensive alcohol and there is a slight taste of spear mints on his tongue. While our kiss was getting deeper and more passionate, I let out a slight moan and grab his hair. It seems to have done something to him too, because now he groans into the kiss. He grabs my ass and pulls me closer to him than I already was. I can now feel him. Every part of him.

In the heat of the moment I move my hips slowly, earning another groan from him. He breaks the kiss. “Don’t do that here. Save that for later.” These words make me do it again. And now move hips in a way he can definitely feel it. I do too. In that short moment, I can feel his hard-on. Oh god, is he just as turned on as I am?

Our lips connect again and all of sudden I see flashes around us. Shit, the paparazzi. Neymar doesn’t break the kiss though. That happens a minute later. He let’s go off of my jaw and he brings his mouth close to my ear.

“I’m sure you will make the front page now, bêbe.”

#neymar #neymar jr #neymar fanfic #first fanfic ever omg #neymar smut #neymar jr smut #neymar fluff #neymar jr fluff #football fanfic #wc

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earl-grey-orange-tabby · 4 months

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my aftg fan cast

disclaimers:

a lot of these, especially in the next part, aren’t actors, so this is less a fancast and more of a “i have a horrible imagination and need to visualize characters so they feel more real to me” list

if they don’t look like what you picture, agree to disagree! i love seeing other ppl’s perspectives of what the characters look like and i hope you do too

without further ado,

neil josten - benjamin wadsworth

okay listen just because i picked the most used neil fancast DOES NOT MEAN THE REST OF THIS LIST IS BORING!!! he’s just so neil-coded to me in deadly class! i even put him into a photo editing app to change his hair and eye color and he still fits!!! plus the top right pic is exactly how i imagine a nathaniel smile.

andrew/aaron minyard - vlad konoplev

i’m gonna give credit to @kalu_aftg on tiktok for this, because i saw this actor in their tik tok. he’s in a russian series called my biggest secret (i watched a couple clips but i haven’t seen the show)

but come on!!!! this is andrew minyard!!!! and always with andrew fancasts it’s difficult to see them as aaron but i feel like this could go both ways, especially in the bottom right pic. identical, but different vibes, yk?

dan wilds - kiersey clemons

i first saw kiersey clemons in new girl as kc and she feels so dan! then i saw the pic on the top left and i was like YES! this. is. dan. she seems very sweet and friendly but i know she could give a great game face.

nicky hemmick - conor husting

even his pics give off major nicky vibes. he also has a very similar hair length to what i picture nicky with. fun fact: he’s also half-mexican on his mother’s side which is strangely accurate lol!!

allison reynolds - jessica lord

i’m gonna be honest i just searched up “blond actresses 20’s” and that top left photo popped up and it was just so so so allison!! i included a couple pics of her in the ballet movie “find me in paris” because i couldn’t find a lot of pics of any of these actors in active wear and this felt close enough.

kevin day - nicholas galitzine

honestly i got this idea from an instagram live he did where he was yelling about being 6 foot and my brain was like “that is kevin day IN THE FLESH”. i originally saw him in bottoms and he totally cracked me up.

matt boyd - daniel ezra

like come on!!! his smile is so bright and inviting, it gives off such strong matt energy. he played spencer james in all-american and i haven’t watched it but ive seen ppl say good things. bonus: he’s the only one i could find with any form of a face guard (even tho nick galitzine also played a football player in bottoms lol)

renee walker - sydney park & lana condor

okay SO my criteria was soft-looking people that can look sharp in other pictures, and i came up with these two! it’s kinda hard to picture renee without the pastel/white hair but let’s suspend disbelief.

seth gordon - young david beckham

speaking of suspending disbelief, LMAOO. just hear me out, okay. seth was a fifth year, slightly older than the rest of them, so i was looking for that + blond buzz cut and this is the result!

and that’s all! i have more so i’ll probably make a part two, but im having trouble finding a nathan because it’s so hard NOT to picture nathan as a redhead but that means he probably won’t look like benjamin wadsworth.

#aftg #all for the game #andrew minyard #neil josten #dan wilds #matt boyd #renee walker #seth gordon #kevin day #allison reynolds #nicky hemmick #foxhole court #fancast

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wolfythewitch · 11 months

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Wolfy, you have not only dragged me into the EPICS, but also now into the prince of Egypt (I'm on my first watch) I did not expect it to be this good, although I'm a little confused on what's going on This is infact an invitation so you can ramble if you please yes yes

HI YES PRINCE OF EGYPT INCREDIBLE MOVIE

It details the story of Moses, specifically found in the book of Exodus (aka, a departure or emigration), and also the story of Passover, a Jewish tradition. If any of my Jewish followers want to talk about that, feel free! My knowledge is very surface level and mostly from what I've read from the bible.

But so yeah at that time, the Hebrew people were slaves under the Egyptian rule, but they were multiplying too much and the pharaoh got nervous. So he ordered that any infant child be taken and thrown into the river. Moses was a baby at that time, and so he would've met the criteria of baby throwing. His mother did not vibe with that order and took Moses, placed him in a waterproof basket, and sent him down the river to hopefully find a better future than drowning. He ends up floating by the royal palace and gets found by the princess, daughter of the pharaoh(tho in the movie they changed her to be the wife instead) who takes a liking to him and decides to adopt him. In the bible, Miriam (his sister who the mother sends to follow him) asks the princess if she'd like a nursemaid, claiming to know someone (that someone being Moses' mother), and the princess agrees, so Moses gets to be with his family for a few years before going back to the palace. In the movie they don't have that and he's taken in directly with Miriam just praying he be safe and come back to them one day. So it's not very explicit in the bible but love the relationship between him and Rameses (I don't think he was actually named in the bible, but historians figured it was him based on contextual evidence) godbless and then he accidentally kills a guy and runs away. He meets tzipporah and his family and gets welcomed in and married and stuff. So the burning bush. Moses' destiny, if you will, is to save his people, and God tells him as much. Go back to Egypt and free his people. Moses doesn't think himself up to it but God says he'll be with him. So he goes back and does. Rameses refuses because that's his entire workforce, and in retaliation God sends down the 10 plagues. With each plague, Rameses hardens his heart and he refused to let Moses' people go. Until the tenth and final plague, the death of the firstborn. Any household with lamb's blood painted on their doorpost, the angel of death will pass over (AYEEE Passover). The Hebrews knew this but the Egyptians did not. Finally, at the death of his own son, Rameses tells Moses that his people are free.

They take their stuff and go. Thing is, to be actually free, they'd have to cross the wilderness. But there's a pesky sea blocking their way, which isn't very great for the whole crossing the wilderness thing. Also, the Egyptians had a change of heart and are going to get them back. So they're trapped between the sea and the enemy. God sends down a pillar of fire to stall them (though iirc in the bible it's like a cloud of darkness and a pillar of light depending on who you were) and while that's happening, Moses goes over and strikes his staff into the water. And the red sea parts before him, giving them a straight path across. You know the rest, with the people crossing and the waters coming down to drown the army and stuff. So now they're officially free from the Egyptians! But they're not done yet, because the main goal is to reach the Promised Land, and Moses is designated to lead them. They do skip ahead a few chapters and have Moses already grab the two stone tablets with the ten commandments, that doesn't happen until later and involves a golden calf haha

#scoopac #wolfy tedtalks #anon #wolfy religious tedtalks

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iloveschiaparelli · 15 days

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Finding out from my mom that I spoke full sentences at 10 months old and then adding that to all my other memories of being young just feels like a punch to the gut

When I first self dxd autism I knew that my experiences from age 10 up were consistent with autism diagnostic criteria but I only had a very vague understanding of how my early childhood was affected. Like I knew that I behaved the same way but I didn't have any specific examples and at first my mom didn't believe me either, so she wasn't much help. I honestly believed that I must not have presented autism in an obvious way, since it was missed in my childhood.

But since then I've realized/learned several things:

I was speaking in full sentences at 10 months old. Typically that isn't supposed to happen until age 3 or 4.

I spoke incessantly. All the time. To the point where my mom still jokes that they had to "train me to stop talking" (what exactly that entailed I have no idea???)

Throughout my life including early childhood people have asked me to slow down when talking or remarked on how fast I spoke

In my childhood and pretty much through out my life pre-depresion, people would remark on how good my memory was. Especially in my early childhood (4-8 years old) I would get comments like this ALL THE TIME, I just remembered literally everything?

I taught myself to read at age 4. Because I wanted to read the same storybook over and over again for a period of over a week at least, and my caregivers were sick of reading it to me and started saying no when I asked. So I said "fine, I'll just read it to myself." I was reading at a 3rd grade level at least. by the time i was 5. When I was 5 or 6, I read The Secret Garden, unabridged. I remember this because I was really into tinkerbell at the time, it had just come out. TSG was my mom's copy of the book from her childhood and I had to confess to her that I had fallen asleep while reading and the paperback cover had fallen off in my bed.

Despite making my way through the book pretty quickly, I did not understand a lick of the meaning. I just took down the sequence of events.

I often sat down and arranged stones or blocks or my dollhouse elements by category, size, or color. I would also spend times trying to make sure the chains on the swinger were perfectly aligned.

I watched Finding Nemo maybe 30 times when I was 1-3 years old. Like I would beg my parents to start it over again immediately after it finished. At the time my parents owned a wall projector instead of a TV, so big picture. I suspect now that I was seeking out a visual stim because I still find that movie delightful.

Also forgot to mention, we lived in Japan when I was 1-2.5 and I started learning Japanese?? I don't remember it but according to my parents I was already using some Japanese words by the time we returned to the US. And I had learned to use chopsticks.

Dinosaur. Arms.

Picky eating that was explicitly known to be a texture issue. Nobody thought to analyze this further.

When I was 6 or so I was exposed to plush blankets for the first time. It became my dream to own one. I bought my first one when I was 19 and now I own like 10 of them because plush is one of my favorite textures in the world. But girls I would literally sit in bed and dream about owning a plush blanket. For years. Every time I went to summer camp and someone brought one for themselves I would stare at it, forlorn. Yearning.

I would read the science homeschool books excessively. I went into 5th grade Earth Science already knowing everything that we were being taught, because I had pored over geology and physical science books since I was 5. Probably about 5 years old is when I was able to explain how volcanoes worked and the layers of the earth. Also the water cycle.

These science books also included my dad's 100 year complete collection of national geographic magazines. At 2 years old I was able to explain the star life cycle and how black holes formed. As well as what would happen if you fell into one.

Once I gained access to the internet at 14 my knowledge of the cosmos expanded explosively. I became able to thoroughly explain multiverse theory, multiple theories for the origin of the universe, a good deal of the geological history of Mars, Mars's atmospheric composition, and could fully explain how solar flares worked, how Earth's magnetic field protected us, and how Mars magnetic field had disappeared taking the atmosphere with it. I was failing biology.

Transfered schools twice and a year later had to start biology over again, this time aced it. DNA replication was simple as pie.

SUCKED at math. Always.

Sucked at socialization.

Hyperfixated on the Maze Runner movies to the point where I had the 2nd one memorized and would read the credits for fun. Got so into the BTS that 5 years later I went to film school.

LOUD music was my faborite coping mechanism. Just about destroyed my hearing because I would, on a nightly basis, play heavydirtysoul on loop through the Brookstone ear buds I had gotten for Christmas at Max volume until I felt calm enough to sleep. Would also squirm with the music which i now know to be an uninformed attempt at stimming.

Just... how did I NOT get screened for autism as a kid? I was literally a textbook case for what likely would have been diagnosed as aspergers at the time.

My parents were somewhat neglectful at that time because of a lot of reasons, but I don't really fault them for it. Sometimes I forget that they even were but then I remember things like this.

Asked my mom about it yesterday "how did you not think me speaking full sentences at 10 months was weird?!!" And her response was "we didn't know!"

They didn't know my dad was autistic.

They didn't know that hitting your milestones 2-3 years early is NOT normal and likely a sign of a disorder.

They didn't know that repetitive behavior and obsessive organizing is not normal.

If they had known...... my childhood would have been so different. I wouldn't have nearly flunked out of college. I wouldn't have grown to hate myself because of my social skills. I wouldn't have had countless episodes of feeling like I was going to explode out of my skin but shoving it down and chewing on my cheek just to get through the social situation. So much would have been different.

This is why it's so important to spread general awareness of autism symptoms and behaviors. Real and varied examples, not just solely sdtereotypes and nonverbal autistic alone. And not just autism either but pretty much any disorder.

Or at least an awareness about what child development is SUPPOSED to look like, so that parents can flag when things aren't normal.

#actually autistic #Autism #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #Science #Autism awareness #Autistic #Audhd

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absolutebl · 1 year

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10 BLs where the Main Couple has NO Prior History

Or at least, very very little of it. The opposite of the very popular LTP (long term pining).

This post in response to a question posed by the most excellent @luuhecia who asked: Soooo here's my plea: do you have any recommendations of shows where the people involved have no previous history?

In other words we get to watch them meet and fall in love with no prior history on either side. So I eliminated those were there was a made crush even if only recently (e.g. Light on Me, Takara & Amagi).

1. Seven Days

They know of each other but just in a normal high school way. No pining. The story is basically about the 7 days it takes them to fall in love.

2. Color Rush

They are destined for each other but they have never met before.

3. Semantic Error

In fact, part of the premise is a “hunt for the unknown boy who made him fail to graduate.”

4. To My Star

They have a couple of meet cutes, accidentally shack up together.

There are actually a TON from Korea.

5. Addicted

The new kid in high school. They have a family connection (it turns out) but they didn’t know each other.

6. Restart After Come Back Home

We see them meet for the first time and then go on from there.

7. HIStory 2: Crossing the Line

They meet by crashing into each other because... Taiwan.

8. My Tooth Your Love

Just so cute.

9. Eclipse

There are a lot of good ones from Thailand but I chose this because it’s part of the plot, how they know nothing about each other.

10. Love by Chance

Just the greatest meet cute ever.

NEW ENTRY

11. The Eighth Sense

Actually uses the fact that the DO NOT have prior history with each other as a plot point and for character development. It’s addressed directly ind dialogue. Very nicely done!

Others that didn’t make my top 10 but still have no prior pining

China

Advance Bravely

Capture Lover

My Esports Genius Brother - love at first sight

Japan

Candy Color Paradox

Given - love at first sight

His the series - love at first sight

Senpai This Can’t Be Love (he has a crush on him but they haven’t actually met each other)

Silhouette of Your Voice

Kieta Hatsukoi

My Beautiful Man

Mr Unlucky - love at first sight

Korea

Kissable Lips - fated mates

Mr Heart

My Sweet Dear

Love Class

Behind Cut

Shoulder to Cry On

The Lover - cohabitation

Unintentional Love Story

Tasty Florida - love at first sight

Roommates of 304

All the Liquors

Blueming

New Employee

Nobleman Ryus Wedding

Oh Boarding House

Ocean Likes Me

Tinted With You

Wish You - love at first sight

You Make Me Dance

The Philippines

Like in the Movies

My Day

Rainbow Prince

Taiwan

Because of You

Be Loved in House I Do

Craving You - love at first sight

HIStory 2: Right or Wrong

See You After Quarantine?

Vietnam

Hay Rival I Love You

My Lascivious Boss - one night stand

Nation’s Brother - one night stand

Want to See You

You Are Ma Boy

Thailand

(not all are chronicled, there’s too many, main couples only)

Ai Long Nhai - love at first sight

Bite Me

Between Us - one night stand

Coffee Melody

Love Mechanics - one night stand

Ghost Host Ghost House

Gen Y - love at first sight

KinnPorsche (family connection but they don’t know about it)

La Cuisine

Tale of 1000 Stars - Well there is the heart connection but it’s not quite the same thing

Love in the Air

Love Area

My Engineer

Meow Ears Up

Moonlight Chicken - one night stand

My Ride - GREAT example of well developed meet cute and then romance

Never Let Me Go

Not Me - erm, it’s complicated

Oh My Sunshine Night

Oxygen - love at first sight

Paint with Love

Puppy Honey

Siew Sum Noi

Something in My Room

Top Secret Together

TharnType

Tuxedo

Unforgotten Night - One Night Stand

Vice Versa

What Zabb Man

YYY

This post as of April 2023, not responsible of BLs that fit this criteria after that date. But feel free to leave a comment or repost with more additions.

(source)

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aoki553 · 4 months

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'bpd makoto teruhashi??'- a character analysis/yapping session because no one understands the siblings like i do

Time to turn the capslock on for this one! The writing might be incoherent, but I want to focus on getting my thoughts out with this one, so be aware. Let me start this post by clarifying - I am not a psychologist. This is for fun, done used resources I've found online. This is about an anime character, not about a real person's struggles.

Trigger warning for obvious sibling marriage romanticization mention sighhh like we aren't talking about it constantly when it comes to him apparently.

We all know the way Makoto has been protrayed in the series - a comically overexaggerated siscon. His portrayal makes many people uncomfortable due to his perverted obsessive behavior.

Except, I'm going to throw it all out the window cuz in this post I meant to take a look at his behavior from a fan's perspective without any biases like 'eww yucky siscon make me uncomfy'. NONE of that here.

I'll start by addressing the elephant in the room and the main reason i'm making this post: Makoto's obsession. Both of the Teruhashi siblings have obvious superiority complexes, however, Makoto is overshadowed by his little sister's charm, whom he idealizes and has an unhealthy attachment to. He's aware of his own charm and beauty, but only takes it to account to point out how he's the only one worthy of Kokomi's love and attention.

Kokomi has clearly been his whole world ever since she was born. A life-long fascination and attachment that went unnoticed. His perfect little sister is able to change his mood drastically whenever she's getting attention from anyone other than him or is even slightly dissatisfied with him.

He lacks a sense of self - only Kokomi matters for him. He's able to ditch his responsibilities in an instant, only to be with her. He's depicted as a cherub to Kokomi's goddess appearance in the mobile game and as a chauffeur in the Duet Shite KudaPsi anime end credits. Always below her, as her servant.

He becomes severely distressed and panics over even something so simple as a her getting a cold. (Just like everyone else at her school, but he's there for her.)

At all times he needs to make sure she isn't surrounded by men that are 'unworthy' of her, even to the point of stalking her to get some piece of mind. He craves her approval and cares for her like no one else in the entirety of the manga. (Example: Taking her to movie theatres and watch every movie he has ever starred in to show her.) These are signs of Kokomi being Makoto's 'favorite person'.

Awesome, but does it explain Makoto seeing her not as his sister, but as a future wife? Is it just him making things way creepier in his mind than they need? Yes, actually.

Makoto's overprotective and obsessive behavior is comically exaggerated, duh, but if we think about it for a second... Kokomi is a person he's been there for her whole life, he provides and protects her from unwanted attention. He dedicated his whole life to her and knowing there is an unavoidable future of his whole world collapsing because someone will take his place. Not as a siblings, but as a lover - something more important than family. How can he avoid this? By being the one to marry her, of course. No one but him is worthy of her anyway, right? Why should she need anyone else? No matter how messed up that sounds, it's his way of thinking.

Now let's go over some of the diagnostic criteria for BPD. I'll be using this site and infographic as my resource, just to give a few simple (but appropiate in my opinion) examples.

Fear of abandonment, rejection - while it's not explicitly stated, I believe his 'marriage' thing is just that. Not wanting to be abandonned and forgotten by the only person he loves and cares about. I don't believe he has any perverted motive behind it. Just fear and wanting her only for himself.

Idealization and devaluation - both extremes show up in his behavior. Most notably towards Kokomi or Kusuo. He's hostile and outright rude to Kusuo, but the moment Kokomi shows up he becomes all sunshine and rainbows. Another example of it is his indifference towards Kokomi's friends, compared to the excessive attention he gives to his sister. My theory is that Makoto doesn't have relationships due to a predisposition to making his relations with other people unstable, or never even bothering to try in the first place. (Like he is towards Ruchi, for example.)

Impulsivity and inappropiate anger - he rushes to anger the moment his love is threatened. A simple thought of Kokomi getting romantic advances enrages him. Even if it could cost him his career or his public image - something Kokomi cares about the most for herself, the opposite to her brother.

Emotional instability - we've only been shown his mood swings like the one below. If we got to see more of his personal life, this one would be much clearer, but it's something a siscon pun character doesn't get to have in a comedy manga, so I'll leave it at that.

Paranoia - Let the image below speak for itself... His delusions can be interpreted as a symptom on its own, too.

But what could've caused this? Since we never see what the Teruhashi siblings' parents are like, it's easy to assume Makoto has a role of her caretaker or a provider, due to only these two being ever shown living in the wealthy Teruhashi residency. The only time we ever see their parents being acknowledged is when Saiko spread a fake rumor of Mugami Tooru having an affair. Note: We never actually see them, we don't know if they're even there.

My personal theory is simple - Kokomi's charm and absent parental figures must've affected Makoto's development and made him emotionally dependent solely on Kokomi's well being. I'm taking his idol career into an account as well, since he must've been scouted into show business in his teens, or earlier. (He was already famous by 17.)

Conclusion: I think Makoto is an interesting example of a person with BPD in media, but I'm often disappointed how little we talk about it. Or maybe I'm just too obsessed with him to see him only as what he is on the surface. :3

PHEW. So after like 4 hours of trying to put my words into one big post I think that's all I had to say for now about this topic~! I have a lot of love for this boy and I really needed to get my thoughts out about this theory of mine. Sorry for unnecessary rambling and incoherence at times. Thanks for reading!

#even if you held me at gun point and asked me why am i so obsessed with this siscon i would just preferred to get shot cuz i dont know #genuinely #alex rambles #saiki kusuo no psi nan #saiki kusuo no ψ nan #saiki k #teruhashi makoto #kusuo saiki #makoto teruhashi #saiki kusuo #teruhashi kokomi #kokomi teruhashi #teruhashi siblings #teruhashi #the disastrous life of saiki k #borderline personality disorder #bpd

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luwritesomething · 1 year

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read the thing you wrote abt mickey altieri 🥺🥺 i love that man so much. if i could, i was wondering if i could request something abt him? maybe something where the read has insomnia and he helps them actually sleep <33 only if you want, of course 🫶

Mickey Altieri x Reader: Nothing’s Gonna Hurt You Baby.

Words: 1199

Warnings: mickey is a killer but reader doesn’t know that (however this is not what the fic is about). there are light mentions of anxiety, stress and pills (for headaches), i think there's swearing (bc it's me).

Summary: after a movie night with your boyfriend mickey, you don’t want to go to sleep.

Author's note: thank you so much for requesting, @altierirose!!! mickey will always have my heart, and he’s so fun to write for. i didn’t make this explicitly about insomnia, but reader does have trouble sleeping and that’s what this is about. no hate to dirty dancing, btw!!! (just a bit.) i'm giving you a follow bc there's not much people appreciating our boy... feel free to request whenever !!!! this is my attempt at not using "y/n" anymore.

Criticism is appreciated and request are open (except for the Wednesday fandom)! Hit that anon button and tell me your idea! You can see the character i write for HERE.

Every Friday night was reserved to you and Mickey since you two had started dating, some months after the beginning of your first college year. It had been agreed by the two of you, because you had soon realized that college life was messy, difficult and crowded; and a little bit of bonding time reserved for your relationship sounded like a good idea. Slowly, it escalated from cute little dates in the campus’ cafeteria to coffee shops outside the enclosure, until you two finally retreated to one plan and one plan only — movie night.

Fairly chosen, one week he was the one to choose one of his movies in between his precious collection, worthy of a Film student; and the next one you would choose, sometimes with better or worse criteria, but always having fun. Popcorn, candy and a blanket pulling you close together, his hand either around your shoulders or wrapped around your waist, letting you lean into him. It was a great plan for a Friday night.

This week it was your turn, and you had purposely chosen a movie that would piss off his movie buff extraordinare’s taste; something like Dirty Dancing. Mickey had bitched around for quite a while, not letting you hear the somewhat awful dialogues, but amusing you anyway because even if he could be annoying, Mickey was still funny and charming, in his own way.

The movie ended not too late, to Mickey’s relief, and as soon as the credits rolled in your little TV he jumped out of the bed with the empty bowl of popcorn in his hands, while he roasted the movie like it had personally offended him.

“It just makes no sense.” He said, putting the bowl in the only table you and your roommate had in your shared dorm. Your friend had always been kind and comprehensive enough to allow you to have the dorm whenever Derek, Mickey’s roommate, didn’t want to leave his. Mickey turned to you, still in bed, with a wide grin. “And seriously, Baby? It’s just so unrealistic for someone to spend a whole summer being called Baby by everyone.”

“Mickey, it’s a movie.” You laughed quietly, your head cocking to the side.

Mickey pointed at you with his index finger. “That’s not an excuse, and you know that.”

You rolled your eyes at him. “Whatever.”

He couldn’t help but chuckle at that sight, and you watched him do so. Mickey looked really handsome when he laughed, as his face filled with joy and beaming happiness — you liked the way he enjoyed himself around you. It was something sweet.

“I’m dead.” Mickey was able to say as soon as he stopped laughing, exhaustion washing over him after a hard week. His body felt sore, you could tell by the way he crawled to your side in bed. His body next to yours, even on top of the sheets and blanket, felt so familiar. A smile was shot your way. “Let’s go to sleep, uh?”

Something inside you crumbled suddenly as soon as you saw him getting inside the bed, without bothering to look if you were doing the same because he thought it was rather obvious. It produced you a feeling close to anxiety, thinking about sleeping while you slid by his side — this week had been hard on both of you, but what had kicked your ass the most wasn’t assignments and classes, like it had happened to him, but sleep.

A series of all-nighters the last week had thrown you off, and now your sleep schedule was messed up. You had laid in bed every night, eyes closed, waiting for Orpheus to sweep you out of the world and into sleeping, but it hadn’t happened — as much, an hour or two before your alarm went off you would fall slightly asleep, producing you low headaches that you had successfully avoided with a few pills.

“But it’s so early.” You said, and your voice went a little higher like it used to do whenever you lied, catching Mickey’s attention.

His eyes drifted to your alarm clock behind you, head tilted. “You’re not tired?”

“I am.” You sighed, and then you stuttered a bit, before confessing. “But… I haven’t been sleeping well. It’s– It’s silly.”

Mickey’s body language changed instantly. His back straightened, so he could sit up with it against the headboard, body turned to look at you and give you his full attention. His eyes scanned you slightly, making you look away in embarrassment — you were a grown adult, and not wanting to go to sleep without a good reason was childish, you knew.

“Is this about the murders going on?” Mickey asked quietly, like someone else apart from you could hear him talking about the matter that had been hunting everyone in your circle for the last couple of weeks. Two people had been murdered in the new, based on real events, slasher’s opening night. “Because if it’s that, I can promise you, you have nothing to worry about.”

“No, it’s not that.” You shook your head, to prove your point, then just shrugged. Mickey watched you curiously, carefully. “I think I’m just too stressed. The exams, and all… College life isn’t as good as they paint it and, I don’t know, maybe I can’t take it.”

A beat of silence, then two, before Mickey’s brows furrowed together. “That’s bullshit.” It surprised you enough to not let you speak instantly, giving him time to speak first. “I mean, I understand you being stressed, it’s natural. But if you can’t take it, then no one can.”

“That’s not true.”

“But it is!” He insisted, seriousness written all over his face. You had only seen him this serious once or twice before, when he was passionately defending a horror movie from Randy’s criticism, and when he had asked you out for the first time. “I think you’re taking it all too seriously. You stress too much about every single test and—”

“But it is serious, Mickey.” You interrupted softly, wrapping your arms around your knees for comfort. “I can’t slow down.”

“It shouldn’t take your sleep away.” He retorted. His hand reached out for you, comfortably squeezing once. “You’re doing great. I mean that. But you need to chill.”

Nodding slightly, your gaze fell down and away from him, processing his words. The silence settled between you, but Mickey needed to know what you were thinking �� not anymore to have the upperhand, but because he was worried, and if there was something pure in him, that was his love for you.

His hand left yours to barely graze your chin, lifting your head and gaze up. “Is that all of it?” Mickey asked softly. His eyes shone. “Nothing more on your mind?”

“That’s all.” You muttered, nodding slightly. He gave you a smile.

“Wanna go to sleep now?”

Once again you nodded, and you two slid inside the bed. He switched off the lights and his arm surrounding your waist and pulling you closer didn’t startle you. Mickey didn’t fall asleep until you did, surrendering yourself to the calm circles Mickey rubbed onto your back and his even breathing close to you.

#mickey altieri #mickey altieri fic #mickey altieri fanfiction #mickey altieri x reader #timothy olyphant #scream franchise #scream #scream 2 #lu writes #lu writing #my writing #writing #fanfic #cigarettes after sex #inclusive reader

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cemitadepollo · 1 year

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@tragicallyphosphorescent

You see, the thing about "sociopaths" it's that they're not real. If you open a psychology book, as you apparently hint to have done at some point, you'll discover that the term you're using isn't only scientifically inaccurate, but an outdated and harmful term used to refer to people with ASPD– Anti-Social Personality Disorder. This cluster B disorder is developed as a coping mechanism by people who suffer from childhood neglect, so people demonize literal abuse survivors for their little "serial killer abuser sociopath" fantasy that they saw in their favorite true crime movie. I would love to know where did you get the objective fact that most "sociopaths" don't seek treatment and hurt people.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder, otherwise known as NPD or just "narcissists", is a disorder that's classified in the cluster B category of personality disorders according to the DSM-V, this disorder is also developed because of childhood neglect. People love to armchair diagnose their abusers with this disorder under the ignorant belief that narcissistic people are selfish and that's it, it's used as an interchangeable term, which couldn't be further from reality. So no, I don't believe in "narcissistic abuse". Abuse is just abuse, an abuser is just an abuser, there's no need to slap anything else alongisde that label.

Just because a manifestation of trauma is different it doesn't mean it's bad. People with ASPD and NPD are as likely to abuse someone as a person without them. Lacking empathy doesn't make someone a bad person, empathy is just the capability to instinctually feel another human's feelings, but it's not the same as sympathy or compassion. A good person is one who's actions do good.

Now, I'm not invalidating the abuse anyone has gone through. If you tell me somebody, anybody, abused you, I believe you. But there's no need to demonize disorders in order to find support or validation.

You can find a free PDF of The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. 5th edition (DSM-V) easily on the internet, no need to buy the book itself. I suggest you give it a read to clear up that whole "sociopath" thing and to educate yourself more on the narcissistic personality disorder. As a disclaimer, the DSM-V is highly discussed by the neurodivergent community on a regular basis and some individuals, including myself, have a word or two about certain criteria that needs to be met to get a diagnosis, but I'm advising you to read it as a start.

Sincerely, a borderline with fluctuating empathy that's very tired of watching their cluster B siblings get denied treatment and dignity, because in case you didn't know this, lots of us actively seek treatment but get deemed "too hard to treat" or get actively abused by the medic system IF we are even allowed some sort of therapy. As a neurodivergent person, I'd assume you know of the kinds of horrors people like you and me suffer in psych wards, except people with personality disorders and other demonized illnesses still get thrown around and abused since our disorders aren't deemed as "harmless" as people who suffer from depression and anxiety or people with autism.

#ableism #tw narc abuse mention #aspd stigma #tw sociopath slur #s slur #npd stigma #aspd culture is #npd culture is #bpd stigma #bpd culture #cluster b #cluster b disorders #cluster b discussion #neurodiverse stuff #actually cluster b #neurodivergent

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maddys-nerd-blog · 3 months

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Maddy’s Favorite TMNT Films Ranked!

It’s my birthday!!! I’m officially 25, which makes me shudder cuz I’m in my quarter life crisis now. REGARDLESS! Since it’s the day of my birth I thought it right to do something special!!

And that’s rank ALL the TMNT movies from my least favorite to my all-time faves!

I’m honored you all enjoyed my silly episode ranking, it was tons of fun to do and I loved writing it!! Chatting about these turtles has been nothing but fun and brings me tons of comfort, so I’m happy to do one of these again! I just pray my opinions aren’t too controversial 🤣🤣

Ten movies, all about four teenage mutant ninja turtles. One nerd to review these. This’ll be fun!!

Let’s kick some shell! 💜💜💜

Some criteria!

These are just my thoughts on the films! I’m not the end all, be all of what movie is THE BEST or THE WORST. If you like a movie that may have ranked lower, that’s awesome!! Let’s all share our opinions on them and have a fun time!

Straight to DVD films are included in this lineup!

The live concerts and We Wish You a Turtles Christmas are not allowed cuz those are fever dreams 🤣

I’ll be doing a classic ranking system from the bottom all the way to the top!

SPOILERS BEWARE! … AGAIN 🤣🤣 and some slight swearing, I may have gotten excited while writing this 🤣🤣🤣

Let’s begin!

10: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 3 ( 1993 )

My Score: 2 out of 10.

This movie is a fever dream and I can’t be convinced otherwise 🤣

I mean, can you blame me? This was made in a last ditch effort to get Turtlemania back in the mainstream just as it began to die down… and this was a BAD way to win fans back.

From the terrible comedy to the worst TMNT villain in the franchise to grace the silver screen in the form of Walker. Don’t even get me started on the god awful turtle costumes this time around because… dear lord, they’re nightmare fuel. If I saw these guys in an alley I’d run for the hills! They’re downright grotesque to look at! All the characters are either whiny, boring, or unlikable. I have nothing but respect to the voice actors of Leonardo and Michelangelo for sticking it through all three of the classic movies, despite the terrible script they had to work with in this installment. I also feel awful for Elias Koteas, who got the short end of the hockey stick— see what I did there? I’ll see myself out 😂— after ALL the grief Karen’s made him deal with after the first movie, getting booted from the sequel as a result of their nagging, only to be brought back to this mess. And what was with the ancestor-but-maybe-not-but-wait-he-might-be guy that Koteas was also playing??? His character made ZERO sense!

And that Splinter puppet???? THAT THING IS UGLY.

I would never watch this one again unless it was for memes. “What did you expect, maybe the Addams family?!”

No, but I expected a better script than this BS.

9: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out Of The Shadows ( 2016 )

My Score: 3.4 out of 10

This may be a tighter script and a slightly more coherent plot, but DAMN, I can’t bare to watch this one for more than ten minutes on a good day.

First of all, Leonardo in this one is downright terrible and a bad leader. I’m STUNNED he never gets reprimanded by his Sensei for his nasty treatment of his brothers— telling Donnie to LIE TO HIS FAMILY ABOUT THE OOZE????? That’s out of character! Belittling Raph with that whole ‘There’s only one vote that counts’ line???? And putting the blame on him and Mikey for the police station fiasco?! He comes off as a bully!!

The plot is somewhat stronger than the first but it’s just taking elements from the Marvel movies, such as the hole in the sky like The Avengers. Shoving needless fan service in our faces as if to say ‘SEE??? WE LEARNED FROM THE FIRST ONE, WE HEARD YOU, THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED RIGHT?! LOOK! THERE’S A FROZEN NEUTRINO ON KRANG’S SHIP!’ Sorry, but this ain’t the Sonic movie, it isn’t going to work unless you actually respect the material you’re adapting! Like with the Sonic movie! They fixed Sonic’s look because of fan demand, and they actually respected their advise! Here though? It’s like they’re just throwing it in our faces just to spite us. It’s not coming from a place of love. Casey Jones in this film is a joke— what a waste to this iconic character to turn him from a badass vigilante into a whining baby vying for April’s affection. Bebop and Rocksteady are annoying as hell. Stockman sucks. Karai is a nothing sandwich. Shredder barely does ANYTHING. And Krang??? EW. Just… ew.

But for all my ranting this far, I do have some positives from this one— April actually gets to have a playful personality which is fun! Once again the turtles are the highlight. Their designs this time around are great!! Less accessories but it allows for more room to show the guys’ fighting abilities and the accessories they do have is there as an added bonus, not to clutter their look! I feel like this was Donnie and Raph’s movie more than anything! The amount of attention they get in this film alone shows that there were writers who loved these guys and treated them with respect! That scene where Donnie single-handedly TOOK CONTROL OF A CRASHING AIRPLANE USING HIS BO AS THE STEERING?! THAT WAS SICK!!! And Raph once again is an absolute BEAST in battle! The motion capture artists are phenomenal as the titular man characters, they all had great chemistry together! I just feel awful that they had to be treated so badly behind the scenes…

It’s not a great movie, and even with the few redeeming factors it still makes me irritated.

8: Turtles Forever ( 2009 )

My Score: 3.5 out of 10

PLEASE DON’T HATE ME 🤣

Remember what I said about us not getting a proper crossover until Ciro Nieli adapted the 1987 turtles into the show?

Yeeeeeah. This one was NOT it. And this was supposed to be the 25th anniversary movie???

For some reason, ALL the ‘03 turtles are so bitter and mean to the 87 counterparts. They’re putting them down at every instance where combat or character bonding is involved, which is ridiculous. ‘03 Donnie WOULD NEVER be so nonchalant about meeting another version of himself— and why does he constantly put down ‘87 Donatello for his inventions??? They should be hyping each other up and talking techno babble! Why is Splinter the only likable person in the whole movie?! Why did they change April and Casey’s designs to look like random anime characters?! ( NOTE: I know they changed them to match the 2007 film at the time, I’m just being funny )

I already can’t stand the ‘03 version of Shredder but DAMN, they’re making him out to be the most amazing version of him out there. It’s like the writers behind this movie are ragging ‘87 Shredder— WHY DID THEY MAKE HIM A HAPLESS IDIOT?! They gave ‘87 Shredder so much disrespect! In the original cartoon, while he could be used for laughs, he was also taken seriously and seen as a very real threat. He was no slouch whatsoever either, he easily took the turtles out in one episode in season two! The only ones who actually stayed ‘in character’ were Bebop and Rocksteady! It’s like this movie is tearing down what made the OG series fun and iconic to build the ‘03 turtles up to be THE greatest team. I just wanted these two teams to be working together and learning from one another in their own ways! Like, imagine a scene where ‘87 Raphael teaches ‘03 Raph to rip the fourth wall! Or ‘03 Mike and ‘87 Mikey showing each other their own nunchuck tricks! You know? ACTUAL BONDING????

And yes, the OG voice actors were swapped cuz of union disputes by 4Kids. The only one that sounds kind of like his original voice was the guy playing ‘87 Raph. Otherwise? They all sound pretty bad. It actually made me cringe the first time I got around to hearing them, I did NOT get used to them.

I understand there’s an extended cut out there that addresses some of the issues that were cut for time, but unfortunately we don’t have that version to go off of, so I’m left with this.

All I have to say is, THANK YOU CIRO NIELI!!!

7: TMNT ( 2007 )

My Score: 6 out of 10

No this was not intentional 🤣🤣🤣

We’re nearing the halfway point and we’ve reached the TMNT movie I saw as a kid! Fun fact, this movie came out after my birthday and I BEGGED my dad to take me to see it. So as a birthday treat he took me and my brother to see it opening day! Not only was this my introduction to the turtles, but it made eight year old me curious about the series!

Is it as good as I remember?

Well… no, but it’s not bad!

I’ll admit, the plot is kinda slapdash and nonsensical. Like… I know, I know, this is a franchise about teenage turtles who learn ninjutsu and fight a man dressed like a cheese grater. But even for me this story is out there. Why do the Stone Generals have no personality or defining traits other than the weapons they use? Why is Winters so generic? The concept of an immortal general searching for thousands of years for the lost monsters to atone for his terrible mistakes is cool, just not for this franchise if that makes sense. Also this movie doesn’t seem to wanna give Donnie or Mikey any agency; they’re mainly in the background doing comedic stuff or off on the wayside with nothing to do whilst Leo and Raph are pushed into the spotlight. For a story centered around bringing a fractured family back together we don’t get to see how Mikey or Donnie have been handling Leo’s absence during his time spent in Costa Rica.

Yet through this muddy plot we have some of the most iconic/ memorable moments in this franchise! Raph being the Nightwatcher— which is coming back in the comics soon!, Donnie’s tech support meme, THE LEO VS RAPH FIGHT ON THE ROOFTOPS WHICH STILL LOOKS FREAKIN AMAZING TO THIS DAY???? Seriously, Imagi Studios had such an incredible future ahead of them, it’s a shame they went bankrupt! Some of my favorite actions moments in this movie are towards the end where the family is in Winters’ compound and we’re treated to a one-take camera pan of them brawling through a slew of Foot ninja!

And the voice cast here is great!!! Nolan North as Raph??? James Arnold Taylor as Leo?! CHRIS EVANS AS CASEY?! AND MOTHER FING MAKO, AKA UNCLE IROH HIMSELF AS SPLINTER?! It’s a great ensemble!!! Everyone here clearly gave it their all, they should all be praised for this!!

You can tell there was a ton of attention to detail put into this one, and that the people behind it had tons of fun animating it. We could have had a really cool film series on our hands had the studio not fallen under. Otherwise, I still enjoy watching this purely for nostalgia purposes!

6: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: Secret of the Ooze ( 1991 )

My Score: 6.9 out of 10

For a movie made right after the first to cash in on the Turtlemania high, I gotta say, this one’s really fun!

It’s not without flaws though; Karen’s gotta ruin the fun once again and the tone was dragged WAAAAAAY down to take away the darker themes from the previous film cuz they thought children couldn’t handle any action that was too violent. Karen’s also took Mikey’s nunchucks away and got rid of Casey. The story is goofier and doesn’t allow for any space for these characters to breathe or emote past being lighthearted and funny. April isn’t as down to earth since Judith Hoag was replaced, Casey Jones is sorely missed in this story, Tokka and Razar are just dumb, bumbling monsters made to replace Bebop and Rocksteady. Professor Perry is obviously supposed to be Stockman, and the Shredder doesn’t truly engage with the turtles until the end of the movie. The Super Shredder was just a missed opportunity! The turtles don’t get to use their weapons at all except for Donnie cuz he uses a giant stick.

The positives outweigh all of that though! As always the turtles are fun and lovable, the new voice for Donnie is awesome, we get some great comedy spliced throughout the film, the Go Ninja dance sequence is so memorable that to this day people are still bringing it up! And I’d be remiss if I didn’t bring up the introduction to Keno, played by Ernie Ryes Jr., the stunt double of Donatello in the first film!! Keno is a GREAT addition to this cast! I adored his quips and the action stunts he pulls off are thrilling! I honestly think he’d be an awesome character to keep bringing back in new projects! COUGH MUTANT MATHEM SHOW COUGH. I wish he was in more stuff cuz he really is a fun addition to the roster! I even had the opportunity to meet Ernie Ryes Jr. this last summer with a friend of mine, and he was SO nice and SO chill! He was so excited to meet fans who were talking about TMNT, and when I told him how much the franchise meant to me, he gave me a hug and took a pic with me!!! He was such a great guy!!!

I can always go back to this one and smile throughout the movie! Also, GO NINJA GO NINJA GO—

ONTO THE TOP FIVE!! From here on out these are the movies I can rewatch over and over and never grow tired of viewing them!! So let’s get this party started!!

5: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ( 2014 ) ⭐️

My Score: 7.8 out of 10

Say what you will, but I love the first movie more than the sequel 🤣

I love this movie, it’s a ton of fun and the action is truly a spectacle! I feel like I had more fun with this first movie than it’s sequel because, firstly, the plot is quick and engaging. Sure, there are some issues, but I can forgive it because…

This movie IS JUST FUN.

I know this is gonna be a controversial opinion but I really like the first movie over the sequel! I really liked April! I’m of the opinion that Megan Fox can be a decent actress if she’s given the right script, and in this movie, despite the fact she might not have the most compelling arc, she’s still a good interpretation of the spunky reporter we all love! Will Arnet is also pretty funny as Vern! I still think Sacks should have been Stockman instead of Shredder. Making that swap has no integral change to the plot and it would have made more sense. Like… why not keep the mad scientist character as the already established mad scientist? The origin change inspired by the IDW comics may be jarring but I didn’t mind it! It’s just a different iteration of their upbringing but it still remains true to the turtles themselves!

The motion capture technology for the turtles is jaw dropping. I mean it. It feels like Megan Fox is making direct eye contact with these giant mutants, they’re interacting with the scene and characters, when they engage people in combat you FEEL those blows and believe they’re actually beating the snot out of these thugs.

But by far, the turtles are the biggest highlight of this movie. They’re tons of fun to watch and their banter and chemistry is great!

Do they have tons of needless accessories? Yeah

Do they look cluttered? Yeah

But does that take from their personality? NO

Donnie IS A CINNAROLL AND MUST BE CHERISHED. I feel his own techy gadgets and gear adds to his introverted personality! He’s such a lovable dork and I really liked him in this one! Jeremy Howard is a perfect fit to voice/ act for him, nobody can convince me otherwise. PLUS THAT ONE MOMENT WHERE HE SMASHES HIS BO INTO A FOOT GOON’S KNEECAP????

Raph IS A FREAKIN BEAST! GOD-DAYUM, this turtle is easily the strongest incarnation of the hothead to date! Tossing shipping containers like it’s nothing, casually breaking through steel fans to create a blockade against the Foot! I might be in the minority but Alan Richardson is THE first voice I think of when I’m told to say which Raph I prefer!

Mikey is still a bit iffy for me cuz of the weird innuendo jokes, but I can see why people like him! I still think him flying around on a hoverboard skateboard is dope as hell though. And Leo is likable in this one!! He’s actually a responsible older brother who’s devoted to his family and not a selfish jerk keeping secrets from his brothers 🤣🤣😂

Plus, the emotional parts of this one hit harder than the sequel for me, especially on my first viewing. The Splinter Vs Shredder fight is intense and really REALLY well choreographed, very inventive and exciting with all the stunts Splinter pulls off. The moment where Leo and Mikey both scream for their father, the blink and you miss it line of Leo calling Splinter ‘dad’— which was improvised by Leo’s motion capture actor— and the gut-wrenching aftermath of the battle where they’re led away in chains believing their father is dead… that may have gotten me misty eyed.

The snow chase? Badass.

The climax? Pretty damn good.

That elevator scene that was entirely off script and improvised by the motion capture actors? BEST SCENE IN THE ENTIRE FILM.

Is this the best? No, but it didn’t have to be! I love this one! And I can happily say it’s the most fun I’ve had with the Bayverse turtles 🤣

4: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ( 1990 ) ⭐️

My Score: 8.9 out of 10

This is, without question, one of the most stunning displays of practical effects and costume work in any film made at this time. Henson’s Creature Workshop truly outdid themselves in this feature with their work on the turtles.

The turtles look like living, breathing creatures. They actually look as though they’re real! There a small flaws, yes, but I can look past it because the amount of detail and effort that went into these things is incredible!! The stunt actors brought the action to a whole new level in those suits! You can tell every ounce of passion was put into this, and everyone had so much faith in seeing that these turtles lifelike! Brian Tochi, Josh Pais, Corey Feldman and Robbie Rist were perfectly cast as the four mutant turtles!!!

Judith Hoag plays a phenomenal April! Fun, spunky, witty and clever! I met her last summer too and she was truly wonderful!! Such a kind woman who listened to my story and connected with me!

Whoever hired Elias Koteas as Casey needs an eternal raise. He looks like he popped out of the comic and came to life. He was perfect!!

Splinter in this movie IS A GREAT FATHER AND AN AWESOME PARENT.

Shredder gives me chills he’s so intimidating.

When this movie came out everyone went bonkers with Turtlemania fever. The critics slept on this one because this was Eastman and Laird’s comics brought to reality. Steve Barron of Take on Me fame delivered on presenting the dark and gritty nature of the turtle’s lives and how brutal the Foot truly is.

I gotta highlight that score for this film because John DuPrez??? You’re a GENIUS.

My only issue is Danny. He was just obnoxious and selfish the whole way through until the climax. Like… hope you have a couple thousand dollars left to give April instead of the 20 you stole, kid, YOU GOT HER HOUSE BURNED DOWN.

THAT FIGHT SCENE ON THE ROOFTOP IS DOPE AND FUCKING AMAZING. AND CASEY CASUALLY TURNING SHREDDER INTO CRUSHED TUNA???? WE LOVE A BASED CASEY.

I don’t know what else to say other than this is the epitome of a true 90’s classic.

3: Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie ( 2022 ) 🥉

My Score: 9 out of 10

Holy. Shit.

This movie LOOKS FUCKING GORGEOUS. DISNEY WHO????? DREAMWORKS WHO???

Before I got into the fandom I found this movie through the trailer and Black Nerd Comedy’s discussion about it. On a day I was bored I turned this on.

AND THIS MADE MY JAW DROP.

I had ZERO clue this movie looked as visually pleasing as it did. I adore this film and the animation behind it. It’s so clean, so slick, the pacing is just right, the action alone made the hair on my arms stand up! I love watching the animatics and storyboards behind the action scenes of this film just to study it and marvel at how freakin talented these artists and animators are!!!!

The voice cast knocked it out of the ballpark! Ben Schwartz in particular deserves massive praise for his performance as Leo, such a dynamic range of emotion to balance out the ‘comedy guy’ to ground him in this serious situation. Plus, Sora from Kingdom Hearts is in this as Casey Jr! 🤣🤣 his character arc having to change from the carefree prankster to the leader who had to step up and save his family is a thrilling plot point we see unfold!

I loved the characters!! I loved the score!!! I loved how this film wasn’t afraid to be genuinely SCARY with the Krang.

The angst???? The whump???? THE CLIMACTIC SHOWDOWN???? CHEFS KISS!!

WHY DID I NOT DISCOVER RISE SOONER?!

I can’t help but gush over this movie of because this is top notch quality!!! I have nothing to say, this one is OP!

2: Batman Vs The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ( 2019 ) 🥈

My Score: 9.8 out of 10

FUCKING.

LOVE.

THIS CROSSOVER.

Literally one of the best crossover films of all time. I adore this Hellboy art style for the film, I adore the opening intro where it’s all German-deco-Impressionism/ noir influenced and it’s all dark and covered in shadow minus the blips of color to symbolize the characters.

I adore the handling of the martial arts versus the brutal, grounded combat style of Batman! I love how the animators literally used the backgrounds to their advantage and made them pieces for the characters to use as weapons!

I adore how the turtles have such natural banter and chemistry with one another! I love how Batgirl and Donnie bond!!! I adore how everyone plays off of each other! The dialogue is fun and full of charm! I loved watching Batman and Shredder going completely off the rails on each other!

I love Donnie!!

I love Mikey!!

I love Batgirl!!

I love the subtle reference to Pink Floyd!!!

I LOVE ALL THE REFERENCES TO ALL THE DIFFERENT ITERATIONS OF TMNT HISTORY BECAUSE YOU KNOW THESE WRITERS/ STORYBOARDERS/ DIRECTORS CARED ABOUT THIS.

My only complaint? The Batman villains are underutilized, their mutant designs are bland as hell and Joker and Harley suck. But I’ve always hated those two so that’s not an issue with the film itself.

That pizza party at the end MAKES this for me. I got the comics this was adapted from, those are SOOOOO GOOD!

Nothing but high praise here. All my heart goes to this one. And this used to be my champion, until this movie blew it out of the water…

1: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem ( 2023 ) 👑

My Score: 12 out of 10

This. THIS is the quintessential TMNT film experience.

Call me biased. Call me boring. Call me basic, but THIS MOVIE SAVED ME THIS PAST SUMMER.

The teaser came out the week of my birthday last year. I couldn’t stop smiling when we got that first taste of what the animation was going to be like. It was like a feast for the eyes!

I trained myself not to watch ANYTHING past that first trailer. I had to ignore leaks and spoilers for MONTHS, I even ignored the posters of the characters themselves because I wanted to be genuinely surprised by who was in the movie. It was like I was prepping for Endgame all over again. I got the figures to prepare for the movie, I bought early fan screening tickets in advance, I took my best friend with me to share the moment cuz there was no way I was NOT gonna have my bestie there too. I even custom tie dyed a shirt with Leo and Donnie’s colors and decked myself out in TMNT gear the day of the premier. I went into that movie bouncing in my seat.

And I left that movie smiling with joy and laughing and crying. And then I proceeded to see it THREE MORE TIMES IN THEATERS. That’s an honor only reserved for the movies that have moved me enough to cry.

The plot is simple but the twists and turns they take leaves you surprised and on the edge! The soundtracks are STELLAR, both the score and the music they used. There are plenty of Easter eggs to find on a rewatch. The jokes ALWAYS LAND! I love these weird cringy turtles and their memes 🤣🤣

The turtles are precious babies that must be protected! Leo is awkward but lovable. Donnie is a Cinnaroll. Raph is hilarious and probably needs a stress toy to calm his anger. Mikey is a joy to watch and he’s relatable! April is fun as hell, MUTANT MAYHEM SPLINTER IS A GREAT DAD AND IN MY TOP THREE BEST RAT DADS LIST. Superfly is HELLA scary, the iconic mutants they included are fun, MONDO GECKO MY BABY BOY LOOK AT HIM GO!

This voice cast is going to become iconic. Everyone from Ice Cube to Jackie Chan to Paul Rudd to the very first actual teen cast of the titular characters!!! Nicolas Cantu, Micah Abbey, Brady Noon and Shamon Brown Jr delivered excellent performances and brought these guys to life!

THIS ANIMATION IS SO UNIQUE AND COOL!!! It looks like EVERY medium was explored and used— everything from 3D to sketchy hand drawn, erratic wild outlining to claymation?! DUDE THIS IS LITERALLY SPIDERVERSE BUT FOR TMNT!!!

The MOTHER FUCKING NO DIGGITY MONTAGE ARE YOU KIDDING ME—

It was all I wanted. It was everything I wanted it to be and then some. After the shit I had to go through in 2023, it felt like a giant breath of fresh air to enjoy something I was so excited for, if only just for an hour and a half. I went straight home and showed my older sister, who was recovering at home at the time during one of her treatments, all the merch I got from the fan event and rattling off about the movie. She laughed and said ‘I’m glad you had a great time!’

Not gonna lie, I was apprehensive when I heard Seth Rogan was the one helming this project cuz his track record of movies hasn’t been the most… friendly to sit through. But, with this? I tip my hat to him! He delivered for the fans, big time.

I loved this film. It’s my favorite TMNT movie of all time. I’m totally stoked for the new series coming out this summer. All I have left to say?

COWABUNGA! 💜❤️🧡💙

TADA~! And that’s it! This took me a week to finish but I’m proud of it!! 😁 I had so much fun making this list!!!

What would you rank these movies? I’d love to know and hear your thoughts on them!! 😁

Thanks for reading!! Have a great day! 💜💜💜💜

@queen-with-the-quill @tending-the-hearth @mermmarie @lameboobah @tmnt-tychou @indieyuugure @wasted-and-ready @figuringitoutasigoalong @angelicdavinci @zandiiangelspit @jadethest0ne @turtle-babe83

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sirpoopepic · 10 months

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WELCOME!!!!!

I'm Alyna or aweena!! I'm a female,. not questioning during this moment in time....(PS I'm underaged, so don't be too weird! :^0 ) I'm a m'sian!!(Yes... Rare 2 find a Malaysian MCR fan isntit??)

((Ps! Click this 2 C my carrd!))

I will blog some of my thoughts,, and rant about things.. when I feel like it.. lol. and heads up, I'll post blood n gore-ishy art out of the blue, and I'm also very experimental with my art, so don't expect 1 artstyle only!!!! I also post at my own pace, so patience, patience people !!!

My interests..

Don't really have a specific kind of favorite music or artist,, but some of my on repeats are MCR, pierce the veil, Lamp, green day, smashing pumpkins, (old) P!ATD, Avril Lavigne, KORN, and Linkin Park. I listen to a whole lot more (I promise)

I really like puzzle games, not so much of a gun game person but Splatoon is an exception!! little nightmares, Stray, It takes two, Sally face, minecraft, and The cave are definitely my all time faves!

Few of my favorite movies are fifty first dates, white chicks, and juno.. but I watch lots of animated stuff like Song of the sea, the breadwinner, some Ghibli films here and there and especially Tim Burton films!! Some series are inside job, MTV downtown, Hilda, and clone high!

Oh yeeah! A DNI list!..

Basic DNI criteria. If you think you qualify for it,, you know I'm referring to you..

Please don't interact if you actually GENUINELY enjoy shipping real people.

-> Not exactly much, but I'll block anybody who I CONSIDER as weird..., And you already know who I'm talking about..

And that's basically about it, just don't be sucha CREEP! Thanks!!!

pst,, heres my carrd❤️

Things that go on in my head. I'm a huge sucker for 2000s nostalgia

(X updated 13/11/23)

that's it!! Enjoy your stay! xoxo

#introductory post #blog intro #introduction #my stuff #about myself #Spotify

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adarkrainbow · 5 months

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Do you think the way people talk and discuss Walt's "Classic Three" (Snow White, Cinderella and Aurora) is accurate or close to what happens in the movies? I mean, they are always referred as excessively passive, weak, only interested on their looks (vain? superficial?), useless, beauty being their only good quality... And I ask myself, when was the last time these people watched the movies? Snow White negotiated her stay in the house, Cinderella survived a life of pure abuse & orchestrated her own escape from the tower, and, while not very much is shown about Aurora, she was about to sacrifice her personal happiness for the kingdom's sake (something Philip didn't have in mind)that takes courage! They don't wield swords but they are much stronger that they appear, and while I get some of the critique, I hate the "strong only means kicking butt" idea, like, it's incomplete, and superficial, and it can be reductive & dangerous (for the girls, and for the boys too!)

I have talked about this before in many posts, and others have talked about this way better than me, so I'll try to break down my opinion in a quite short and concise way. And as usual, you probably won't be surprised to find me again, neutral on those topic.

On one side: people are unfairly criticizing and judging too harshly the "original trio" of Disney movies. This has been explained by many people on this website, so I won't expand on this too much, but indeed, there is a mixture of superficial viewing of these movies, of not-contextualizing them, of projecting modern-day values and expectations over nearly century old pieces, and of a general need to criticize and rant about everything (especially big corporations and the "classics" of culture - whenever something becomes a classic, a backlash awaits). Cinderella is a much more surprising and strong character than you'd expect. These movies do teach the idea that being strong doesn't mean simply kicking everybody and proving yourself to be a lone wolf (especially since there's a strong focus on friendship in those stories). The whole "the prince kissing Sleeping Beauty in her sleep is rape culture" is ridiculous ; especially since in the Disney version it was made to be a true love kiss, between people who were in love, and the whole context was the breaking of a curse ; AND the actual rapist-origins of the story are from a 16th century Italian fairytale nobody knew about until the Internet dug it up in the 2010s. Even today many people who invoke the rapist-story are unable to tell you who wrote it or where it comes from, because they just latch onto the idea "Oh yes there's a rape story." and that's it, no more research for them.

Heck, Sleeping Beauty is even surprising for its time AND for the Disney criteria by having elderly, non-attractive female leads who do more than the actual male hero and ultimately are the true focus of the tale - the fairy godmothers. Same things with Snow-White - to make the dwarfs the equal of the titular Snow-White, even more to focus more character development and screen time on them rather than the princess, and to give them unique characterisation and treat them as people rather than plot-props... This was BIG, this was not something usual, and this was a game-changer. Overall - I say the same thing for fantasy literature - a lot of the "new" or "modern" twists people expect from today's fictions are awaiting you in the past. Everybody complains about traditional fantasy not having POC main characters or not having strong female lead that is not sexualized - Earthsea had all those by the 60s and 70s, and it was just as influential on fantasy as Lord of the Rings or Elric.

However... Recognizing that a lot of the criticism is unfair and overblown, and that the backlash is ignorant and caricatural does NOT mean we should just blindly worship and naively accept those movies as untouchable, sacred relics that cannot be criticize. If there is a backlash, it means there is a reason for such criticism to arise in the first place, and we must identify why - to give back the problem in its proper proportions, and not in the exaggerated state we are offered today.

So... The other side - why is this Disney trio not fitting our modern world?

And the answer is very simple. They are heroines of 17th and 19th centuries tales, that were adapted for an early 20th century American mindset. They are bound to age or be unfit for the 21st century. Placing them back into context allows us to understand how great, good or groundbreaking they were in their time - but it does not mean they hold up to modern-day characters. Some elements of the Disney movies aged better than ever, some are still resonating today, and this is what gives them an "out-of-time" feeling. Yet... yet there is a reason why the "Disney princess" had to evolve and had to change herself to fit a new audience. Why did the characters of Rapunzel and Elsa of Disney had such huge success and were beloved by the masses? Because they were answering early 21st century needs, society and expectations, the same way the original trio did for their time.

A character like Aurora of Sleeping Beauty couldn't work today because she literaly is a paper-thin character that does nothing throughout the story and is truly more of a MacGuffin than anything. Oh yes she speaks, has a song, has feelings and emotions - and there is this very progressive idea of having Aurora be unhappy and traumatized by discovering her princess heritage, which aged very well! But the rest? She is a baby ; then she sings about being in love ; then she cries about not wanting to be a princess ; then she sleeps ; then she is married. The story is done and moved by the interesting characters about her, but not by her - Maleficent wants to destroy Aurora, Philip wants to save Aurora, the fairy godmothers wants to protect Aurora... I do not recall which feminist created this theory, but there is the test of the lamp. If you can replace a female character by a beautiful lamp, this is bad for you. And unfortunately Disney's Sleeping Beauty "succeeeds" at the test of the lamp, since Aurora's massively passive involvment in the story makes her a perfect fit. The king and queen create the most beautiful lamp you ever saw ; Maleficent angry curses the lamp to be destroyed ; the fairy godmothers are tasked with keeping the lamp safe ; later the prince discovers the lamp in the woods and wants to have it for his living room, so he plans to return later ; meanwhile the fairy godmothers return the lamp to their rightful owners the king and queen, while Maleficent captures the prince who returned in hope of taking the lamp ; etc etc... It does not change the story one bit.

Another, even more obvious example, of the "age" of those characters - Snow-White. Disney's Snow-White is the very embodiment of the "50s housewife" cliche, and thus was a perfect fit for this first-half-of-the-20th-century American society. In the Grimm story, the little girl enters the house, takes the food, goes to sleep, and upon meeting the dwarfs they make a bargain of chores in exchange of protection. In the Disney movie? She cleans the house all by herself, without asking anybody, just in hope it will please people. Which is a very "fairytale" move... But still is perceived badly as just the typical idea that "A good girl cleans up the house, that we ask her or not". The fact Snow-White also acts as a mother figure for the dwarfs despite being a teenage girl is... yeah it is questionable and there's a whole baggage of the girl existing as solely a future mother and a housekeeper-in-training. Let's not even talk of the infantilization of the dwarfs just because of their small size despite being clearly much older than her...

So yeah, I always take a neutral stance on things (except for a few stuff), and this is no exception. There is an unfair treatment of the original Disney princesses, definitively, and people are misreading the original movies... But when we take a critical look we also have to recognize that these characters were designed for a given society and a given time, and that now they made their time, we do not need them anymore and we can move on to other characters while fondly remembering them or taking inspiration from them. Erasing these characters would be stupid and absurd - but it is just as stupid and absurd to try to cling onto them constantly and to try to make them fit everywhere and anywhere (yes I am taking a jab at Disney and their perpetual recycling and their favoritism of remakes over new movies...).

#disney movies #disney fairytales #disney princess #disney's snow white #snow white and the seven dwarfs #snow white #disney's sleeping beauty #aurora #disney's cinderella

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jeffbiblesupremacy · 1 year

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Jeff's interview for Mint Magazine Thailand

Let’s Make Everyday SATURday (x)

Translation below

After KinnPorsche The Series World Tour 2023 and Jeff Satur Live on Saturn: First Solo Concert in Bangkok, the first solo concert of Jeff Worakamon Satur ended beautifully, and Mint and him met again to catch up about his works. Jeff has grown tremendously as an artist who has his music but also his acting and he has shown his skills to the eyes of the Saturdays throughout the year.

It is believed that the definition of the world "artist" is different for each person. For Jeff Worakamon Satur, also known as Jeff Satur, being an artist is being a storyteller, to convey the stories to the audience with sincerity and spirituality, and without any frame or line, because Jeff's artistic prowess is boundless, just like the story he's going to tell you in this interview.

Mint: What role do you identify with the most? Being a singer or being an actor?

Jeff: In fact, my root is being an artist. I feel like the responsibility of an artist is telling stories. For me, I started with telling stories through songs. Then it expanded to tell stories through acting. Therefore, I'm not looking at myself as a singer or an actor. I'm an artist that shows my true self to the audience.

Mint: What made you come back to music?

Jeff: I don't reckon it as a coming back to music. I’ve never left. I have continued working on my music. Just that, at that time, there was an interesting opportunity for acting. The role was interesting, it fitted me, and I could do it great. Kinnporsche is the only story. I can confirm that music is still my priority tho.

Mint: What criteria do you use to choose a show/role?

Jeff: Actually, there is nothing specific, but it has to be a story that interest me. Personally, I've been listening and telling stories since I was a kid. I like listening stories, watching movies, watching cartoons, watching series, and devouring every story. I grew up with these stories, so I live with a lot of them. I look for new and interesting stories with different plots that make me feel like I want to be part of those storie

Mint: What inspired you to choose Kinnporsche when you just had re-debuted with Warner Music?

Jeff: I get this question a lot during interviews. The first question always was "do you see yourself as a musician or as an actor?" and I would answer "I'm a singer, I don't like acting. I can't do it". In the past, I had never accepted an acting job and I always wanted someone else to be in my MVs, because I didn't like acting and I didn't like to see my face on the screen. I was like I just want to sign autographs, let someone else do the acting instead.

My re-debut with Warner Music was 2 years ago, and I chose the "No boundaries" concept, because I wanted my work had no limits or line. I feel like I've grown up in a way that I shouldn't have a limit to work in anything. If I want to tell something or play something, I just do it. The division is a fictional thing. Being a singer. Being a actor. Even about women and men, about love. All of them are human-made frameworks. I decided to cut them off and focus on being an artist in my own way.

Mint: Do you think you'll change more in the future?

Jeff: I can't answer for the future. It may changed. But now... I don't know. Maybe I will be more open or maybe narrow down until I can find something that truly fits me. In this moment, I feel like the more I open, the more I can see clearer what fits me and what not. Where and how much I can add myself into the works. At the end of the day, all the 6 songs I released are totally different but they all are my songs and they are me today.

Mint: Are you happy with your old works?

Jeff: I'm very happy. I'm happy with everything I've done, even with my old works.

Mint: Since the day you joined Be On Cloud, do you feel like you have grown up?

Jeff: I've grown up a lot. Working with Be On Cloud has been one of the most important moments in my life. Their work culture have made me grown a lot. P'Pong has taught me how to grow up, how to change in terms of working methods and how to think as well, not only as an artist but also as a person who wants to follow a direction as a CEO.

Mint: What's do you think is the difference between Be On Cloud and Warner’s work culture?

Jeff: P'Pond is a very creative person, he's an artist whose projects are very sexy. I got a lot of great things from him, both as an artist and as an executive, and it has a balanced level of familiarity and professionalism.

Warner is being very professional since the beginning, and as time goes on, it's becoming a family with the Global Company system. Although it's a professional style, you can feel the human touch and the love is put into work.

Mint: Personally, what kind of working culture are you most comfortable with?

Jeff: I like both. They have different advantages, so I decided I want to try it for myself. And Studio on Saturn was born, wich is a Jeff Satur Management Company (laughs). It's a co-management with Warner Music, which means I'm in charge of the creative direction and they will help me to make them come true.

Mint: Has working with these two companies changed you?

Jeff: I think the change has to do more with myself and being working in different genres. The more I open up, the more I feel myself, and the more I have the desire to be myself. Especially when I look back to my acting roles, I feel like there are still parts that I want to expand and play on the stage. I started to see clearly what I like in the show. For example my last MV has a lot of me personally than the first MV I released. Working with Be On Cloud and Warner Music have encouraged me and let me dare to be myself.

Mint: So before that, you didn't dare to be yourself?

Jeff: I didn't dare. In the past, I was quite afraid of how others would look at me. I was afraid that people would categorize me in a way that I didn't want to. So I didn't dare to do anything. For example, it took me 3 years to upload my first video on YouTube, because it was easier just to sit in front of the mirror and play the guitar comfortably, without lightning or a camera. It turns out you have to be the one who dares to take yourself out, just by yourself.

Mint: Why didn't you dare to be yourself back then?

Jeff: I think it was because I didn't know how to be myself. I used to not believe what I thought was right. Some cultures make you think that being yourself is not always right. For example, when I was a kid, if I painted my nails or wore eyeliner, I would be teased by my friends. The society didn't empower me to be myself. At home, my mum supported me but when I was outside, the society looked at me in a different way.

Nowadays, there is a lot of talk about gender diversity and beauty standards. I think it has opened many doors for everyone to dare to be themselves more without having to care about what people think/say.

Mint: So we can say that Jeff is being himself now.

Jeff: Yes, in the past, when I was on stage, I was myself but at the same time, I was worried if I was singing right or if I was performing right. If I had to walk or stay still. If I had to come back to the middle of the stage... It turned out that the focus was wrong. Even if I still focus on the work, I can say that I'm 100% myself.

For example my last concert ended without me even realizing it (laughs). The audience probably felt the same way. It went so quickly that I didn't even have time to think anything. I just performed.

Mint: What do you get from Kinnporsche?

Jeff: I always get something back to be someone other than myself. Whether from 'Kim' in KinnPorsche or 'Dan' that I played in the drama "Closer", they always teach me something. From Kim's character I got the courage from him without knowing it. I developed some skills and now they're part of me implicitly. I dare to be myself because Kim's courage came to me.

Mint: You're famous now. Is it what you were waiting for?

Jeff: I don't think I'm famous but my work is more widely known. But it's not something I was yearning for (laughs) I just want people to listen to my music. I want these songs to reach them. What I'm most proud of is that my work has inspired others. I used to write a blog and the message of my blog has helped many people who wanted to commit suicide and I got messages back to tell me they feel better because of my work. No matter what kind of work, but I feel like this is the essence of being an artist. I want my work to inspire others. That's what means to be an artist for me.

Mint: How much does Jeff Satur value his fame today?

Jeff: I value the work. Some people may look at how-well known you are as a success, which it's not wrong, but I feel if you pay attention to how famous you are, you will have the wrong focus. If you're chasing after fame, it will never come to you. But if you work for doing a good job, then the fame will eventually be there. The most important thing is don't compete with other, compete with yourself. Also, fame will be gone one day, and Jeff Satur will not be here forever. But as long as I can be someone's inspiration and sell produce good works, then I will do my best.

Mint: Do you think Kinnporshe has helped people to get to know you?

Jeff: Very much, very much. It's being one of the most important turning points in my life. Including the song "Why don't you stay" has make people to get to know me and listen to my other songs as well. It has pushed me both in my acting career and my music career.

Mint: Have you ever felt sorry that people didn't know you before Kinporsche?

Jeff: I think everything has its own time. If I listen to "Afraid to say" now, I would need to cover my ears (laughs). I felt it was not the right time. I have improved my singing a lot as well as my confidence, which back then was not as strong as today. The stage is my safe place now, and I feel so relaxed on it. I can live there. So I would say everything, including my perception, is at the perfect time. Not better, not worse, but just perfect. It's the best moment.

Mint: Have KinnPorsche The Series World Tour 2023 help you to support your next step?

Jeff: It has helped. The World Tour allowed me to meet people that I don't usually meet like fans abroad. There are places like Taipei, Vietnam or Singapore that I'd never been to, But once I went and I could see how there are people who actually listen to my songs and they sing in Thai is wow, so there is an opportunity to do a World Tour.

Mint: We’ve seen you being more playful on stage, what gives you the courage to unlock this part of you?

Jeff: I've said before that fans like to do memes with my face, right? Like when they find something funny or hilarious. They do like everything about me, even the parts I don't like at all, so I don't have to be cool all the time if I can make them happy anyway. In fact, we're crazy people. When I go to stage, it's the same. I'm tired of "oh, the camera is here, give me a good angle" (laughs)

Mint: Your first solo concert is the starting point or a checkpoint?

Jeff: It's the end of the last chapter. It's the beginning of a new chapter and the end of the last chapter. Oh, what a poet! (laughs). I never thought I could tell the story of my life at the beginning of my concert. The VCR is like a video that I wrote about what I experienced when I was a child, what I used to play and what kind of music I used to hear. There I was playing with Joey, then I was playing the harp, and listening to Korean music too. Perhaps people don't know it, but I'm a Korean music fan, so I picked all of these things to tell. There are many things in my life that have been conveyed through this concert.

Mint: Was your first idea for the VCR like this?

Jeff: Have you ever watched Evangelion? It's an anime and the ending is very confusing, but I think the idea was cool, so I though Why don't I try to tell life stories? Think about it like a sound is made with a story, so every sound has a story, and everyone has a different sound, but also I have a sound that I've collected unconsciously. I want to tell people that there are sounds for everyone. Sometimes there are songs that sound bad but there are not bad songs. There isn't a sad song for everyone or a love song for everyone. it's just one of your songs.

As for the sound of tearing the screen... At that time, I thought it was a cool idea (laughs). That part is dark, right, and then it starts tearing. I explained it to my team and everyone was confused so I got acrylics colors and black paper and I painted it to show them what I wanted and they finally got it. I watched that scene a lot of times and everyone was like, "hey, what's going on?" (laughs). It was just like I imagined in my head, but I didn't do it in the middle of the stage as I wanted at first.

Mint: How do you handle your ideas when you're working with others?

Jeff: First of all, I write them down. Write them all over my phone no matter if they're good or bad ideas. But write them down first. Then, the next day I will check them to see if there's something that works. As for the moment when I have to show them to others... sometimes I have problems explaining them so I have to make them first to see what it will be like. But everyone is always respectful and understand it.

Mint: In addition to this idea, you also chose all the songs for the setlist.

Jeff: Yes, I chose all of them and put them together. The videos, the ideas, the outfits, the set... I feel like people will think that the performance is very serious, but it's a place for us. I feel like I live on stage because it's my safe zone so I want it to represent me.

Mint: Why did you decide to put the song "ไม่กล้าบอกชัด" (Afraid to say) on the setlist?

Jeff: It's a reminder of the beginning. I've reached a safest point, the middle, but this song is part of me and it reminds me of my childhood and how he's known as Jeff Satur now, so why not sing the first song that made me known? I sang this first song with him in the back of my mind. We're far away and maybe he can't see us clearly but I sang that song with him. Slowly I've come forward and end up on a stage, so it was like meeting him with the first song.

Mint: You are involved in every step of your work so, do you get obsessed with the result?

Jeff: It's hard, like in the music video, I sat and edited it as well. I sat and use an editing program to tap and see the frames because I wanted the image in my head to come out as straight as possible. P'Pan, who is the director, helped me. If my idea wasn't working, I had P'Pan to guide me. He listened to my idea and my story and helped me to write it, so I have to thank him very much.

Mint: What else will we see in the next step?

Jeff: There are many things that I can't say but I'm very excited to try out. I still want to try to play in a movie which it's something I've never done before. I have some collab projects with a thai artist and with a foreign artist too, which I never thought he would want to collaborate with me. And there are places that I've never been and I'm very excited to go. I can't say anything right now but it's coming very soon. Everybody will slowly see it like reading a novel and wondering what the next chapter will tell (laughs).

Mint: Anything you'd like to say to the future Jeff Satur in 2 years?

Jeff: Live a happy life because you owe me one.

#jeff satur #jeff interview #mint magazine #translation #i finished it!!!!#yaaayyy!!!

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sch-com · 6 months

Text

Specific manifestations of anankastic / obsessive-compulsive PD in my life

see similar post for schizoid PD

When I first heard of my personality disorders, it was hard for me to notice their role in my life. Part of it was that I was younger, and with less experiences, but part of it was that by nature PDs are so ingrained it's hard to see the full scope of their influence. Particularly I struggled to see the "dysfunction" part - I was thinking that sure, I do experience that, but is it really that bad? And you can't have a PD without the dysfunction, so do I even count? I think that now, after some time and more reflections, I can say I do see the dysfunction, so I thought to share my observations.

Disclaimer: I am going to combine DSM V and ICD10 criteria, and omit those that do not apply to me

Using DSM V + ICD10 criteria for OCPD that are relevant to me:

1/ A preoccupation with order and details that results in the person missing the point of an activity / Perfectionism that hinders the completion of tasks

This manifests in a very classic way for me. I get overfocused on aligning shapes in my presentations instead of focusing on, well, the goal of the presentation. I get fixated on trying to undestand everything in my classes/courses - instead of seeing what the entire course is trying to teach me, I get anxious and feel like a failure for not understaning one concept. It prevents me from moving on and trusting the process.

A big one that deserves it's own point is when I am organising things. I organise everything in my life, and I get into those organisation obsessions. When I am in one, it's all I can think of. How to put those notes in order, where to put this thing, how to create a system that makes perfect sense. Instead of recognising that the organisation part is supposed to help me with the things I am trying to organise, I get obsessed with the details of the organisation system itself.

2/ Undue preoccupation with productivity to the exclusion of pleasure and interpersonal relationships to an extent that is excessive and not explained by economic needs

Very much connected to 3/ for me, more on that there.

When I was still in school, the feeling of obligation was overwhelming. I can't quite even find the words to describe the extent of this feeling. I neglected everything, literally everything to do schoolwork. Sleep, relationships, family, my health, just because I felt this enormous pressure that Have To. I refused to meet with friends, or to watch movies with family, or to do anything fun, or to even go to the doctors because I had homwork, or an exam. And I know everyone does that from time to time, but the frequency and intensity is what made it dysfunctional. Also, as it turns out, it only caused me more harm than good - me getting a good grade 5 years ago absolutely doesn't mean anything anymore now. And me not making any long-lasting relationships? Absolutely does affect me to this day. My priorities were not serving me.

Now I don't have this singular intense big obligation that school was for me, but I still am rather obsessive about trying to gain skills that would make me employable / not useless. Granted, I am failing miserably at that, but it is my main focus. And I still neglect other things and relationships because of work or some other task I deemed an Obligation. I literally work full-time and then study part-time on the weekeds, I don't think I would do that if I cared about friendships or fun...

I can't allow myself to do anything fun / think about anything else when I have an Obligation planned. And it doesn't have to be anything big - even when I Have To buy someone a gift, I will not fully relax as long as I fulfill the obligation. Which is stupid, because there are always things to be done, so I am permanently stuck in this.

And all of the above is so irrational... Like I come from a relatively well-off family. I have had a full time job for a year now, with permanent contract. And yet, I still feel this sense of Danger and that I Have To do all the things, like work and studying, to make sure I don't die (it feels like I will die if I stop).

3/ Reluctance to spend money on oneself or others and a belief that money should be hoarded for emergencies

The motivation for all from point 2/ always has been fear of spending money, fear of being useless, fear of not having the skills for people to employ me and ultimately fear of ending up homeless. I was thinking of this even when I was like 13yo learning geography. I don't know how normal that is. So, I have always saved up as much as I can, to have the money when something bad happens. I am saying when, and not if, because it feels inevitable.

Everything costs money, and when I am afraid of spending it it affects so many aspects of life. I don't go to fun events for which you have to pay. I feel bad going out for dinner with friends, so I isolate instead. I don't buy clothes unless the ones I have are absolutely unwearable. I postpone going to the doctors, or getting tests done when I have to pay. I feel bad even bying basic groceries.

This is a big factor contributning of me not going to therapy, because it's expensive.

I also feel even more guilty when other people spend money on me. Like, I absolutely don't have to work actually, my parents could pay for my university. But it feels too wrong. I can't. I physically can't allow them to.

4/ Reluctance to delegate tasks to or work with others unless things are done his or her way

Pretty related to 1/. Other people just don't care about the details, or doing things right as much as I do (which actually, good for them because I am the one in the wrong, but I can't help it). I hated group assignments in school because of this. And then I would put too much effort into a stupid project that ultimately meant nothing, and so the cycle continues.

On the flip side, it makes me refrain from tasks, jobs or even basic activities which involve other people, because I know I will suffer with trying to ignore the "imperfections", or they will suffer if I nag them about them. So it may be limiting in terms of what I take on. Like not choosing work that I would maybe like / benefit from because it involves groupwork. And let's be honest, in today's complicated world there aren't many things you can do completely alone. All big, important projects involve cooperation.

5/ Excessive conscientiousness and infexibility related to morality or values (not explained by one's culture or religion)

The main value I hold in my life is to cause as little harm as possible. And you know what is the easiest way to cause as little harm as possible? To do as little as possible. I try to not consume much. I isolate because I don't want to hurt anyone with my broken brain. I chose the line of work and study not because I truly want to do them, but because they are viewed as more useful/benefitial than what maybe I would have chosen otherwise. I don't want to be a waste, and a burden.

I also hold some other tangentially related philosophical beliefs, that most likely don't serve me, but they feel too right for me at the moment. To name a few: antinatalism, nihilism, atheism, pessimism (in the philosophical sense). I like to think I could become convinced otherwise, but that I just haven't heard good counterarguments, but I don't know. Some poeple have said to me that I am just stubborn and refuse to listen, so maybe it is my infexlibility and not the weakness of the arguments.

6/ Feelings of excessive doubt and caution

The thing that have defined my life since I can remember is this feeling that the world is a dangerous place. That I am unwanted here and that I have to prove that I deserve to stay. That I have to make the right choices, and be cautious to avoid pain.

It's hard to find specific examples, because it's something so ingrained I can't imagine how I would act otherwise? But even such things as avoiding going out at dark (impossible to do 100% of the time) that made me miss out on fun or important things. I never trust people fully, especially that they will fulfill their obligations to me. I never trust myself - that I deserve to be where I am, and I always feel at danger of getting kicked out of places. I don't trust strangers on the streets to even not attack me, even though it never happened? I could go on and on. I just have this feeling that I always have to watch myself, and my steps, and to prepare for the worst always.

7/ Intrusion of insistent and unwelcome thoughts or impulses

Probably a lot is covered in 6/ as well

I want to also mention my bfrb - skin picking. It's embarrasing to be honest. I pick everywhere, but especially on my shoulders to the point I look like I was burned. I like doing it, but I guess it is unwanted in the sense that I wish I didn't? I don't know, it's complicated.

I would also classify my obsessive need for organisation here. Like sometimes I wish I could just do something, instead of having this need to organise and plan everything neatly first.

For thoughts, it's pretty standard talk of not being enough, of not working hard enough, of comparing myself to others. I recently also started having flashbacks to random memories. I don't particularly want to think about the past anymore, and I wish they would stop.

I also get some thoughts that are like what many people think is going on in OCD - I get anxious about not locking the door, not turining off the oven, stuff like that. I do occasionally have to go back and check to calm myself, and even after I do I still think "but what if I didn't???". A big and constant one is thinking I lost/forgot my keys, wallet and phone all the time even though I am literally touching them in my pocket lmao. I don't think it's to the extent of a person with OCD though.

Fighting all of that just takes a lot of brainpower in my day-to-day, and that is pretty distressing itself because then I will spend my brainpower on thinking about how much brainpower I am using on those things? Ridiculous cirular thinking, that I am also experiencing in other aspects, but this post is long as it is.

#schcomtalk #anankastic personality disorder #obsessive compulsive personality disorder #ocpd #cluster c

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