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eroticsturn · 3 months

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drug dealer- c.s ₊ ⊹

summary: when asking chris for weed, he offers you a different way of payment.

pink - you

orange - chris

warnings: dom!chris x fem reader , praising, use of ma, and idk what else

𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥

you were in desperate need of something strong. you reached out to a friend and she recommend going to chris for some weed. you've never smoke before but you trusted your friend's words. you make your way down the street until you see a figure standing next to the streetlight.

you make your way over to the figure and say “you must be chris”

“what’s a pretty girl like you coming to me to buy some weed?” he questions while looking down at you.

"that's none of your business isn't it?" you replied

"you have a point.. but this is my weed. so technically I can just walk away if I wanted to." he snaps back

you look at him with pleading eyes, "please don't! I've just been having such a hard time mentally and physically. so I just wanted to try it out" you mumble.

"alright ma, but I don't want your money. we can just smoke it together" he suggests

"oh okay, are you sure you don't want me to pay?" you say with confusion plastered all over your face.

he just hums and signals you to follow him. you both make your way to his car and he open the passenger door for you. you thank him and you sit down and he shuts the door behind you. he makes his way to the other side of the car and opens the door.

he takes all the things he needs out and places them on the middle console. he then starts to take the weed out and place it into the grinder. you stare at his fingers and he turns the grinder. you watched as he carefully placed a filter at the end of the paper.

you were mesmerized by his fingers and how fast they were working with the paper. he quickly rolled it up and began to place it on your lips. you slowly opened your mouth a bit to let him place the joint between your lips. he pulled his lighter out and looked down at your lips as he went to go light the joint.

you feel your cheeks flush pink as his gaze is still there. it almost feels like time has slowed down and you two were the only two people on the earth.

"okay ma, so what you're going to do is inhale some of that. but don't forcefully inhale it. then take the joint out and exhale" he states while maintaining eye contact with you.

you attempt to do so, which leads you to cough. he giggles as you pass him the joint. you two continued to pass the joint back and forth. at this point you felt very calm and peaceful. you went to go look at chris. just when you turned your head, he was already staring at you.

"is there something on my face?" you question in fear while touching your face.

he shakes his head no and starts to learn in a bit closer to you. he gently grabs your chin and starts to caress your face. you start to lean in as well until you both are about 2 centimeters away from each other.

he finally pushes himself forward and gives you a soft and slow kiss. which then leads into a heated makeout session. he then reclines his seat back and motions for you to sit on his lap. to which you immediately do.

you both continue to makeout and he starts to kiss down your jaw towards your neck. you started to grind your hips on him and he let out a strained groan. you started to feel him grow under you.

"f-fuck, just like that mamas" he whines out.

he started to kiss your neck hungrily attempting to find your sensitive spot. once he finds it, you let out a little whine.

"you like that?" he whispers, you frantically nod your head.

the throbbing becoming progressively worse. you needed him so bad and you couldn't hold back anymore.

"chris, I need you so bad right now" you whisper shyly.

he looks up at you with his jaw currently at slack. the sight of him made you feel like you could cum on the spot. his pupils dilated and his grip on your hips became firm.

"back seat now." he mutters

you get up and climb over the console to get yourself situated in the back. he climbs over and pushes you down against the seat. he starts to give you heated kisses.

"please chris, please. I need you inside of me" you start to get frustrated.

he lets out a chuckle and says "so needy hm? don't worry I'll have my cock buried deep inside of you in a few"

you laid there impatiently as the need for him grew. it left your core throbbing just by the thought of it. he finally stopped teasing you, and slowly put the tip in. he pushed all the way in. but stopped once he was fully in to give you time to adjust to his size.

you start to whimper as the need for him to move throbbed. you gave him a nod signaling him to move, which he proceeded to do.

“fuck ma, you feel so good. my cock fitting nicely in your tight pussy”

“chris please, i need you so badly right now. please stop teasing me. i-i can’t “

he slowly pulled out half way and slammed back into your hips at a godly pace. your back began to arch against the seat. he ended up towering over you, as you watched his chain swing back and forth. his facial expressions made your core clench.

“holy shit baby , ima cum if you keep on clenching around me like that” he groans as his pace gets sloppier

he doesn’t want to finish so early. so he tries to hold it as much as he can. he looked down at you as your moans start to grow louder. letting him know you’re closer to your climax than he thought. your eyes started to roll back, and your legs started to shake. this sight alone could make him cum on the spot.

“i-im almost there. don’t stop, please don’t stop” you whine

“you like the way im filling you up baby? so good for me, and taking me so well” he moans

it’s not long until you’re about to cum when he says “hold it for me. i’m almost there”

it started to become too much, the fast pace thrusts, the pet names, and him in general. you needed to cum as soon as possible. right before you tell him that it’s becoming too much he shouts out ‘fuck’ and tells you to cum with him. your legs tremble, and you began to feel tired.

“hey ma, you okay?” he says with concern in his voice

“i’m okay chris. but thank you” you whisper softly

he gives you a kiss on the forehead and cleans you up with some napkins he had in the side of his door. he gently lifts you up to help you put your clothes back on, and offers to take you out to eat before dropping you off at home.

𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐨 𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 😭. 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐰𝐚𝐲, 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭!

-𝐚𝐫𝐢 🤍

#matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo #ao3 #my writing #reading #sturniolo smut #fanfic #sturniolo

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queerprayers · 3 months

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any tips/advice for someone who is not catholic who wants to participate in lent? like how to choose what to give up etc?

Cheers to not letting Catholics have a monopoly on Lent, beloved! Last year I answered a similar ask that might be helpful. Here are the thoughts I have right now!

[CW: discussion of eating/fasting in italics] My most important note/disclaimer: Fasting is not for everyone. It is a beautiful tradition (for Catholics and non-Catholics) that can change people's lives, but if it's going to be a part of your practice, do it on purpose, knowing yourself. It inherently changes your relationship with food--and for people who have always had enough to eat, who have never struggled with disordered eating, who have never been seriously ill, there can be a solidarity and new perspective in fasting, in realizing how sensory experiences and comfort and mortality go together, how privileged you are to have the choice to go hungry. But for those who have struggled with food insecurity, or have lived through/live with eating disorders/disability/illness, or any other experience/relationship with food/the body that changes your perspective, fasting will often be a re-traumatizing or triggering practice that doesn't change your perspective so much as reinforce unhealthy ones. Something I think about: why fast if you cannot feast? Lenten fasting brings us to Easter feasting--if that's not accessible to you, if that wouldn't be joyful or affordable or healthy, fasting probably isn't either. Okay, all that said:

There is so much diversity in what a Lenten practice can look like, and I can't tell you what will be most meaningful for you, but I'll give you some ideas and some questions that have been helpful for me to ask myself! Lent existed way before the Catholic/Protestant divide, and exists among so many diverse communities, and there is a path here for you if you want one.

"Giving up something" is the most common language used for Lent--fasting technically refers to anything abstained from--and generally that's really useful! Jesus's forty days in the wilderness was time that he had nothing but God, and during Lent we can get closer to that experience. I give things up not as punishment or a test of self-control (those ideas trigger unhealthy behavior patterns for me), but as a letting go of something that is in my life but doesn't need to be, and may deserve reconsidering. Sometimes it's a bad habit, but sometimes it's just a conscious allowing of my life to grow simultaneously smaller and bigger. There is space for grief during Lent, but we're not just making ourselves feel bad--I've never found forced emotions to be spiritually helpful. Emotions come and go--we're doing this on purpose, and whatever we feel about it, we make space for that.

Ideas of things to give up:

eating out/getting coffee/buying drinks/little treats

impulse buying/nonessentials (you could pick a category, like clothes, or go all out)

alcohol/drugs/smoking (if this would be starting a recovery journey, I am not the person to ask for advice on that but please do seek help)

social media (you could choose one app to give up, or set time limits--it doesn't have to be all or nothing)

scrolling-on-your-phone time before bed/another time when you get sucked in

another form of casual entertainment (like TV/video games--again, you can limit this rather than cutting it out)

sexual activity (I talked about this here)

makeup/other appearance-related thing (I must confess I have considered doing this and always chickened out. I know that's because it would force me to rethink too many things, which is a probably a sign I should do it one of these years.)

a social habit, like gossiping or getting into arguments online

overscheduling/not having rest days (this is often unavoidable, but rest is necessary and holy, and perhaps this is the season for sacrifice in honor of rest)

single-use plastics/another environmental choice

Note: I don't think any of these things are inherently bad things. This is a list of things we can change/investigate our relationship with or have a season without them as a distraction, not things I think we shouldn't be doing or we should feel bad about.

One of the most important things I've realized is that so often I have given something up and not done anything about it. Like I didn't watch TV for forty days and was mad about it and then Lent was over and I watched TV again. Perhaps this strengthened my self-discipline, or made my life better in a way known only to God, but ultimately nothing happened. I didn't consciously do anything else, I didn't learn anything.

Now, when I give up something, I purposely do something with whatever space it leaves. If I'm not watching TV, what am I going to do when I would usually watch TV? Am I gonna pray? go to bed earlier? call my grandmother? Am I gonna cancel my Netflix subscription for a couple months and donate that saved money? Or maybe I'm gonna give up watching mindless TV, and find stories that resonate and make me think. Don't give things up to check a box, but to reexamine your relationship with them, make everyday things sacred, fill the space/time/money/energy you now have with God, and ultimately to set this time apart.

The other way of looking at Lent practices is things you can add. Often, as I mentioned, they go together--you can pair up something you're no longer buying with somewhere to donate to, or give up an activity and replace it with a new one. I always caution against Lent-as-self-improvement--obviously I can support improving our habits, but I've seen too many people use Lent to restart their new year's workout plans, and while exercise can be a way to care for ourselves, if new year's and Lent are treated the exact same way, what's different about this season? What makes this Lent?

One of the questions I've been asking myself recently is: What are you gonna do about it? When I'm investigating a belief, or learning something new, or reframing an old thought process, I ask myself: What am I gonna do about it? Lent is a path to Holy Week--something I and many others commemorate as the week when God was put on trial and literally killed. I genuinely believe God died and was resurrected--how does this affect my life? Believing something like that and not letting it change you is, to me, inauthentic. When I'm considering a belief, I think, if this were true, how would it change me? Would it lead me to Love? Lent (and Christianity itself) over and over asks us to do something about what we say we believe. Faith without works is dead--and faith is a work, something I do.

It's almost Lent, which is preparation for the Resurrection, which fundamentally changes our understanding of what it means to be alive--so what are you gonna do about it? Not because doing something will make God love you more or make you a "better person," or even because you'll succeed or change your life, but because how can we not? We are of course welcome at Easter having done nothing, but I can't imagine knowing what's coming and not letting it change me.

Ideas of things to add to our lives:

start a prayer/Bible routine--I can now wholeheartedly recommend (as a Protestant who connects with ancient traditions but not always Catholicism) Phyllis Tickle's Divine Hours books! For Bible study, I like The Bible Project's videos.

read a book--it can be anything that connects you with God! (I had a lovely experience with Lenten Lord of the Rings last year, and this year I'm properly going through the Quran)

pick a subject to research (theological or anything else)

start to attend worship services or commit to attending more--this could include going to several different places if you don't currently belong to a church

research places to volunteer for or donate to

do something politically active, like calling your representatives, researching the next local election, or attending a protest

donate to the next [insert number here] posts you see online requesting mutual aid

start a physical practice like taking a walk or stretching

write a letter or call someone regularly, especially with people you've been wanting to connect with more or have unresolved conflict with

start/commit to more regular therapy/other health treatment

ask for help--maybe you're the one who needs mutual aid, or reaching out to, or support cleaning your house or with your kids. there is no shame in this.

These are all obviously things we can be doing year round, and certainly we can use Lent as a season to start something we want to keep with us! I'd also encourage us to have something that's only present during Lent, or something that we do more or in a different way.

You asked how to choose, and I don't have a one sentence answer to that (...obviously), but perhaps in these days before Lent you can look at your routine/habits, the places where God is present, the things you do to distract yourself from life (not a crime--just something to be mindful of), and you can see where Lent might be able to come in and change you. The thing that's nagging at you that you know might be helpful, the thing you're not in control of and just do, the time you take up or the money you spend that might not be bad but also doesn't lead you anywhere. We can't expect every aspect of our lives to be purposeful and present, or to be continuously improving ourselves (in fact, that sounds terribly stressful and unsustainable)--but we can look around us. We can have a season that looks different because everyone I've ever known has a brain that craves ritual in some way--and either we do it on purpose, or we fall into it. Do something (or don't do something) a little more on purpose this season.

Another think to think about is what Sundays will look like for you--the "forty days" don't count them. There's no fasting on Sundays--my mom says every Sunday is a little Easter. "Sundays in Lent" is such an interesting concept because it's very much Lent, but the rhythm of our weeks breaks through. When I give up soda, I'll have one as a celebration on Sundays, but a prayer/reading practice I'll continue through. It's up to you and depends on what your rhythm/habits ask of you.

Ultimately, let God interrupt you. Let Them seep in the cracks of everything you do and let go of. To be loved is to be changed. Even the smallest thing--like wearing a cross necklace every day--can cause our lives to be filled with noticing God's presence. I keep saying to do this on purpose, but know that I find Them much more often by accident.

And an obligatory note: starting Lent late, stopping your practice halfway through, not meeting a goal, whatever comes up--Easter still comes for you. Lent is for paying attention, for making space, not for perfection.

I also want to add that while a lot of Lenten practices (including most I've mentioned here) tend to be personal, ultimately what is asked of us is interpersonal. We make space in our life and be more present in the name of Love--which we cannot do alone. If a practice is not specifically about other people (like volunteering/donating), ask yourself how it will serve the ways you love others? This isn't a trick question, just something to think about. Personally, my study of the Quran this season will connect me with my Muslim siblings through time and enable me to more fully love the Muslims around me, and my rhythm of the divine hours will connect me with the wider Christian community and center me as I go about my day, allowing me to be more present in my relationships.

Easter comes whether we're ready or not--and I don't think we can be ready. But we can look at the small parts of ourselves, set this time apart, see what we can change our relationship with, and perhaps when Easter comes, we will every year have come that much closer to understanding what it means to live out the resurrection by honoring the death that came first.

Wishing you a blessed almost-Lent, and praying for you and your practice (as well as all those reading this)!

<3 Johanna

#asks

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echobx · 2 months

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figure you out part 1 - jj maybank x fem!reader

summary: y/n hasn't seen her friends in quite some time and decides that it's time to pay them a visit, but her best friend JJ Maybank isn't very fond of her

warnings: hurt/comfort, verbal fighting, JJ being a bit of an asshole

word count: 4.3k

author's note: it's very much more hurt than comfort ig. I know I fucked up the southern drawl thing that JJ got going on, but I'm not very knowledgeable in that so don't focus on it too much.

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y/n hadn't been that attentive of her friends lately. She had a lot on her plate ever since switching schools, from Kildare High to KCD, and moving out of her family home and into the condo her boyfriend had provided for her after her parents had to move away for work. She hadn't minded it much. She had always been more on her own, had always known how to take care of herself. Growing up on the Southside hadn't been easy, but it had taught her a lot about life, especially to appreciate it when good opportunities were at hand. So she said yes to the car Travis had gifted her on her 18th birthday. She had said yes to moving into the penthouse apartment with him, although he technically still lived with his parents to keep up the facade. His parents were old school, so she had said yes when he had proposed to her. "It's a good match. You will be taken care of, sweetie," her parents had told her. y/n knew it was the right choice, the smart choice. She would go to college, and then they would get married after. He would take over his parents' company, and she would play the trophy wife, raise the children and look pretty. It wasn't a bad future for someone who came from nothing.

The only cons to the big plan were her friends. Well, if they would still call her, that was to be questioned. She had only seen them a few times at parties in the last eight months, but she had come to the conclusion that now, as the end of the school year was right around the corner, she should finally pay them a visit again. y/n missed her friends dearly. She missed hanging out, drinking beers and smoking. She missed surfing and falling asleep in the hammocks at the Château afterward. Before y/n had switched schools, her friends had held a long discussion over the issue. The fear that she would forget them and never look back was great, especially after they had all experienced a similar situation when Kiara had had her "Kook year" like they used to call it. But it hadn't mattered what the Crew had to say, the decision had already been made. Her future was more important, getting off the island had been the only goal for her ever since her first day of High School. She had become valedictorian for this one reason and nothing else. But the worst part had been that they had all been right about her, about the changes.

When y/n looked in the mirror that evening, she could barely see her old self anymore. The washed out shirts and cut off jeans she had always worn had been replaced by pretty sundresses and blouses and other fancy Kook clothes. She looked like a Kook, she lived like a Kook, and anyone who didn't know her from childhood on might think she had always been like this. She had tried to pick something that wasn't too on the nose. A white loose blouse and light blue jeans shorts. Her hair hung over her shoulders in fine beach waves, and for shoes she wore her usual gray low Chuck's. The whole drive over to the Cut, she was plagued by fears. 'What if they hate me? What if they say I betrayed them?' were just two of the many questions that pondered her mind.

She parked her car at the Chat. The old, wooden house still looked the same as it had the first time she had laid her eyes on it. It sat rather idyllic at the sound, and the afternoon sun was painting everything in a golden glow. The HMS Pogue was towed to the pier and the Twinkie parked in her usual spot. y/n thought back to the many adventures she had gone on with her best friends, especially John B and JJ. "Hey there, old girl," she mumbled and let her hands run over the metal of the little, orange bus. "She's not that old, you know," John B laughed from behind her, and she snapped around just in time to be embraced in a hug. "Where were you? Fucking missed you, sharky," he sighed while holding her in his arms. "Missed you too, bird," y/n laughed, and they broke out of the hug. "y/n!" Kiara screamed and slammed her surfboard into Pope, who walked next to her, just for her to run into y/n's arms.

After a warm welcome from all of them, they were sitting on the porch, sharing beers and being happy about the reconnection. "I know I should have come by sooner, but school is a lot and then my parents moved away. It was so much, and I promised myself to focus on my future. I'm so sorry, guys." y/n apologized for possibly the millionth time since she got there. "We would never judge you for that," Pope assured her, and she gave him a thankful smile. "We do judge you though for not texting once, and rather fucking some Kook than coming by to surf or something," JJ sneered as he walked onto the porch. "Jay," y/n hushed as she looked at him. He was hurt, and he was actively fueling his pain over seeing her again into his rage. "No, I get it. You're a Kook now. The car, the fancy clothes, living Northside. You've got it all, don't you," he hissed at her. "It's not that simple," she tried to reason with him, but he didn't even attempt to calm down. "It's very fucking simple, actually. You're a Kook now. No Kook is a friend of mine. You can go." JJ pointed towards the door, expecting her to get up and leave immediately, but she didn't. "JJ, that's enough," Sarah admonished him. "She left us, so don't expect me to be so stupid to let her back in just because she is bored or whatever and decided to pay us a visit," JJ yelled, and it was the last thing y/n had needed to break. She had expected him to act this way, he had always been hot-headed, but this was worse than what she had prepared herself for. She stood up and walked away. "I'm sorry. I should have asked before coming by," she mumbled before leaving towards her car. "And there she runs again. You don't have to come back again, cheater," JJ called after her as she got in her car and drove away.

"What the fuck is wrong with you," Kiara screamed at JJ and pushed him so that he stumbled backwards a few steps. "She wanted to come back, and you pushed her away because you can't fathom that life isn't just black and white. Get your head out of the gutter, JJ, she's not the same girl she was when we met her." "And that's exactly the issue!" He spat out and turned towards John B. "Whatever that was, that's not the same girl we grew up with. She's not our friend anymore!" "Leave! I will not have you call her names and all that crap you are trying to pull right now. Go, and don't come back unless you apologize to her. She had a tough year, and you're just making it worse with your selfish bullshit. Because to me, she is still the girl who kept running into this very door frame because she has shit coordination skills. Maybe you can't see that, but it's true. People don't change that much, not at their core. Leave!" John B stared his best friend down until he angrily ripped the porch door open and left.

Meanwhile, y/n cried the whole way home. She had wanted to spend the weekend reconnecting with her friends, and not just because her boyfriend and his family were out of town. No, she had wanted to do so for a long time, but she had never gotten the opportunity to. But now this was also ruined. Her best friend had ruined it. At least she had still thought of JJ as her best friend before he had screamed at her.

JJ Maybank had been y/n's best friend since third grade. John B and JJ had saved her from a bully at recess, and since then the three had been inseparable. They had spent every free minute with each other. Had consoled one another after a heartbreak or after a fight. JJ had been her first kiss because they had decided to not take any chances with someone who would turn out to be an asshole, at least that had been the reasoning she had used to convince JJ. What she had never known was that Jay had always had a crush on her, just a tiny one, but he was still sure that she was his first love. He had of course never told her about that, or the fact that his heart broke a bit when she had called him crying after losing her virginity to some guy who had only pretended to like her. He had never mentioned that he had beaten the guy up the day after to teach him a lesson. He had never told her how much she meant to him, not even when it might have been the only thing that could've held her back from switching schools.

But then again, y/n had never been that truthful either. She hadn't told him that she had always compared every single guy to him, and that none of them ever came close to how he made her feel. That he had always been her safe haven, the only one she trusted blindly, the only one who had never judged her. Yet he had been the only one to do exactly that as soon as she had come back to her old life. And she hated him for it. They had promised each other to never hurt the other too deeply, but he had done exactly that. She knew his mannerisms. Knew how he tended to push everyone away, the more damage the better, but she had never thought to be on the receiving end of his rage. The betrayal over the broken promise hurt just as much as the words he had thrown at her that night.

y/n cried herself to sleep in the empty apartment that had never truly felt like home because nothing in it was like she had wanted it to be. It was white and clean and fancy. Stone and metal where she preferred wood and old shipped away tile because someone had once thrown a plate out of rage. She missed her actual home, but no matter how much she would have worked, she couldn't afford to rent out the whole house on her small waiter salary. Besides, now that she was engaged and ready to leave for college, she didn’t need the job anymore. She had actually been advised to not keep on working. "It doesn't look good for the family," her boyfriend's parents had persuaded her and as the dutiful girl she was, she followed the orders of her future in-laws.

On the other side of the island, JJ was driving around on his bike, trying to let go of his rage, but nothing seemed to work. Seeing her had caused him distress. Seeing her had brought back all the feelings that he had pushed down so far that he had forgotten they existed. The first time he had seen her in the arms of the Kook, he had wanted to rip the guy's head off. He didn't deserve her, JJ was sure of that. But in JJ's eyes no one was truly worthy of her. He had hoped that she was miserable with him, that once she came back she was crawling, begging for forgiveness, begging to be taken back. But that hadn't been the case. She had proudly presented her new Kook life as if it was the best thing to ever happen to her. JJ had looked at her, and the y/n he had seen had looked nothing like the one he had fallen in love with years prior. He was ashamed of ever thinking that she might not turn into one of them. His rage drove him back to his old home, a place that wasn't his home anymore, it hadn't been in a long time. He had nowhere to go, John B had kicked him out with good reason and none of his friends would help him out, he was sure of that. So the young man drove on and on until he found himself at her old house. It stood empty, no one had wanted to rent it at the high price the owners were asking for. When JJ had heard about y/n's parents leaving, he had assumed her to go with them. And when she had stayed, he had thought she would be allowed to keep living in their house, but even that had not been the case. Instead, she had moved in with her boyfriend, one of the most annoying Kooks he had ever met. JJ thought it was all a trick, gifting her a car, offering a place to live for free, helping her get into her dream college. The only thing he was sure she had achieved on her own was the scholarship, but now that he thought of it, it all seemed too perfect to not have been meddled with.

JJ snuck into her old bedroom, the same color on the walls as it had the last time he was there. The old mattress lying on the bed frame he had helped fix many times. The closet they had hidden in the first night JJ had run from home, the closet she had kissed him in for the first time. He laid down on the bed, like he had done so many times before, just that he was alone now. No one there to help him soothe the pain that he had been holding back ever since she had reappeared in his life. Or was it really a reappearance if you had always looked after her from afar? If you had made sure that nothing bad happened to her? He wasn't quite sure of it, but seeing her smile while talking about her new, pretty and fancy life had hurt him deeply. And pushing her away and hurting her had just done even more damage to himself than he had anticipated at the moment. John B was right, he needed to apologize. And it needed to be a damn good apology at that.

y/n decided to sleep in after that very emotionally turbulent night. Her mind hadn't stopped racing, though. She wanted to go back, to make things right, although it wasn't even her doing. She had tried to reconcile, had tried to get back together with the people she loved most, but he had denied her. 'No, if anything he has to apologize. I won't let him treat me like that, especially him,' she thought while making some breakfast. But her thoughts had occupied her so much that she had burnt her eggs to black goo, and she didn't even have any left to make new ones. So she decided to skip breakfast and go back to bed, turning on the TV in the bedroom. She tried to focus on the movie that was playing in front of her, but she really couldn't. 'Ten things I hate about you?' she thought. "I could give you millions of reasons why I hate him right now," she spoke up without noticing, but then she remembered that she didn't have to stay quiet. She was completely alone, no one to judge her thoughts. y/n paused the movie and sat up. "I hate that you hurt me. I hate that you think you are better than me just because I had to make decisions that will impact the rest of my life. I hate that you never called, either. I hate that you blame me for everything. I hate you so much, JJ Maybank!" She screamed the last part so loud that she would have nearly overhead the knock on her front door. It was already noon, and she was still dressed in her sleeping shirt. It was an old one she had once stolen from JJ, a weird coincidence really.

"Who is there?" y/n asked before deciding whether she should open the door. "It's me, JJ, please let me in," he begged, but she was reluctant. "Are you gonna yell at me again?" she asked while unlocking the door. "No. I came to apologize," he said, and she opened the door for him to walk in. Closing and locking it again as soon as he was inside. "Better to be safe than sorry," she explained after he gave her a weird look because of her actions. "Nice place," JJ mumbled while looking around. "That's marble, isn't it?" he asked as his long fingers ran over the kitchen island. His usual shirt and shorts combo was the same as the night before, and y/n immediately knew that John B had taken her side in the whole dilemma. He had kicked him out, and that was the only reason JJ was now standing in her home. "Yes, it is," y/n answered while crossing her arms in front of her chest. "Open room concept," he turned around and looked at everything. "I bet the bedroom is back there, just like the bathroom," JJ said while walking into the direction he had just pointed at. "What are you doing?" y/n asked as she followed him around. She was well aware of the game he was playing. He was trying to find just enough clues to piece her life together; her life without him in it. "A bathtub and a shower, that's what I call Kooky, cupcake," he noted and winked at her before turning away from the bathroom and towards the bedroom that was lying opposite of it. "That's a good movie." JJ nodded while looking at the TV screen. He jumped on the bed and tested the mattress, pressing himself into the sheets and sighing before getting back up.

"Travis," he hissed. "He's a real charmer, isn't he," JJ mocked as he walked back over to her, looking into her eyes, but she didn't let him get to her. He didn't deserve to see her falter even a tiny bit. "You know, I always thought you'd end up with someone who's less of an asshole, actually," he whispered before brushing a strand of hair out of her face. "I always thought apologies didn't include mocking the recipient or someone who is close to the recipient," she hissed back at him, and he laughed. "Fuck that, I'm not gonna pretend to like him. I should've at least broken his nose the first time he even looked at you." JJ moved past her and back into the living room. "Two flat screens? You really are a Kook. Disappointing," he sighed, not even turning around to look at her. He was aware of the fact that he kept on hurting her, but that was part of his plan. Make her see what she actually needs instead of what everyone tells her to want. His eyes fell on the balcony doors that were covered by big, heavy gray curtains. "Don't," y/n called out as he opened the curtains and then the doors. "I bet he never even cared to ask, because if he did, he wouldn't have given you the fucking penthouse," he sneered before turning around while staying in between the opened folding doors. "You never told him, did you? How long has it been? Half a year since you got together, and he never even considered asking?" "I don't like to make a fuss, you know that," she replied with her eyes closed. Even just looking out of the window at this height made her feel sick. "Can you close it again please," she begged and as soon as she heard the curtains close she opened her eyes again.

"I don't like when you lie to me," JJ whispered after stepping closer again. "You came to apologize," she reminded him. "Answer me one question, and I will apologize and leave. You will never have to see me again if you don't want to, but you can't lie to me. You promised to never lie, remember?" He stared into her eyes and she in his. The bright blue that she loved so much, that reminded her of the sky, the sea. It reminded her of freedom and, most of all, of love. "What do you want to know?" she asked, although she knew it was a bad idea to play his games. Even though they hadn't properly talked in so long, she still knew him best. Other than her, JJ hadn't changed a single bit since she had left. He leaned in closer before leaning to the side and whispering in her ear. "Has he ever made you cum?" She gasped, not only because his words had shocked her, but because the warmth of his breath against her neck, the closeness of him to her, was completely overwhelming. He moved away again to fully look at her, his pupils dilated and a smirk on his lips.

"Why do you want to know that?" she pressed out while trying to not let her desire take control of her body and mind. y/n had always wondered what it would be like to have it all, to fully be his. She had always thought that JJ was the one. That he would be her first in everything, not just the first kiss, but y/n had been wrong. JJ had told her that there could never be anything between them, the rules made sure of that. "I'm interested, that's all. He doesn't seem like the guy to know his way around a woman." He let his eyes wander over her. Well aware of the fact that the shirt she was wearing had once belonged to him. Maybe it was a sign, he wanted it to be one. "We haven't-" y/n started to speak, but JJ just interrupted her. "You're joking right? You have to be joking. Is something wrong with him? How can he wake up and fall asleep next to you every day and not want to fuck you?" He laughed hysterically because in his eyes it was impossible to not cherish her like she deserved it. "He thinks I'm a virgin. I didn't tell him. And he doesn't sleep here every night," she tried to defend her boyfriend, but there was truly no reason for it other than to spite JJ. "I see, he's not only boring as fuck but also the dumbest Kook in town," he laughed. "We agreed to wait until-" She wanted to yell at him, but the words got stuck in her throat. No one knew that they were engaged, no one was supposed to know until the engagement party that was planned to happen a week after graduation. "You're joking? Nuh-uh, you seriously have to be crazy to do that. You're gonna marry a guy who hasn't even seen you naked? Seen you in your most precious moment?" JJ shook his head in disbelief. "His parents are very old school. It's a good match. A good and stable future," she argued with him. "Good and stable can fuck off. You don't even love the guy!" JJ yelled and ran his hands through his hair as he paced the room. He couldn't believe that she was actually planning to destroy her life like that. "You don't know who I love," y/n whispered.

"You are so smart, so fucking beautiful and smart, and you want to throw all of that out of the window for the possibility to play housewife for some asshole that will only end up playing golf and fucking girls half his age?" JJ was disappointed in her. He had always thought that they would actually pursue the dreams they had pictured for their lives when they were kids. He had always wanted to run his own charter, or have his own garage, to do something he was good at. And from what it was looking like, he would get to have a similar enough life to what he had dreamed. It wouldn't be his own business, but at least he knew the guy that owned it, and if he did well enough he would maybe get to take over one day. But y/n? y/n had always dreamed big, and he had never made fun of her for it because he knew she would be able to make it, to achieve anything she set her mind to. "You wanted to do law, remember? You told me you would one day be the youngest supreme court justice ever. That was the big dream, not some sad housewife who hates her life. Please, you can't really mean this, y/n." He was desperate because if she actually had decided to turn her back on the big dream, then there was no turning back. In his eyes, she would be lost if she didn't even consider not going with the plan Travis' parents had laid out for her. "I know, Jay, but things change. I can't afford to study law." She was close to tears, but she didn't want to break down in front of him. "I don't believe you. You can't throw it all away, not for someone who you don't even love." He was adamant about it. There was no way in hell or heaven that she was actually in love with the Kook. "That doesn't matter," she muttered while looking at her feet. His fingers hooked under her chin as he tipped her head back up. "It matters so much, darling. I won't let you make that mistake, not without giving you an outlook on what could be instead," he hushed before searching her eyes for just a short second. Then he leaned in and kissed her.

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please don't copy and/or post my work onto other platforms! ~e©ho

pt.2

#jj maybank #jj maybank x reader #obx #jj maybank fanfiction #jj maybank hurt/comfort #obx fanfiction #my writing #~figure you out #~fanfiction #jj maybank x y/n

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mayariviolet · 2 months

Text

I Don’t Smoke.

Pilot/ Episode One of ‘First Love/ Late Spring’

summary:

“So if you need to be mean, be mean to me. I can take it and put it inside of me.” // “I’m stronger than you give me credit for.”

Some letters addressed to Suguru before and after he defected were written by you, still in their sealed envelopes.

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cw: angst, no use of y/n, allusions to graphic violence, swearing, suggestive themes (but not really), references to blood, afab ‘reader’ x Suguru (I put the reader in quotations because technically they’re the ones writing the letters), fluff (if you squint really really hard), minor f! reader x Satoru.

a/n: I wanted to try something new! I love you, Geto Suguru! My bad for what I’m gonna do! Also on Ao3.

wc: ~4.5k

🏷️: @tacobellfreshavocado, @jeanboyjean (Reply below to let me know if you want to be tagged in the next chapters!).

September 2007

The day before, he defected…

Dear Suguru,

I'm slipping this under your door because I'm feeling a little exhausted after our last conversation. Even though it's been a while. I know our last argument has been 'solved' per se.

But consider this insurance if I don't wake up in time to say goodbye like I usually do! I've been feeling a little more drained lately; I'm sure you know why. I'll keep writing like this if this mission takes a long time. Although, I know we will talk soon. Good luck tomorrow!

With love,

Two days after he defected…

Dear Suguru,

It still feels weird doing this since we haven't talked like this since we were kids, but anyway. We haven't spoken in a couple of days. It's kind of like when we were kids, too. I guess. I heard Satoru and Yaga talking the other day, but I couldn't fully understand what they said. Only bits and pieces. It's like they cast a curtain in the hallway… haha… I know I'm eavesdropping again (don't tell my parents), but I can't help it! It's hard to get any honest conversations out of anyone here. Yaga is probably on our ass about that assignment we haven't finished. I mean- I'm just waiting for you to do your part. Suppose that isn't too much to ask.

Also, they should have fixed my door if they didn't want anyone to hear! It's still creaking! Maybe when you get back, you could also look at it. I'll probably slip this into your room again. But you don't have to respond right away. Just take your time. I know you've been busy going on all of these missions alone. I'm sorry about that. You're probably exhausted. I don't blame you.

Just know that my door is always open (unfortunately).

With love,

Five days after he defected…

Dear Suguru,

Satoru fixed my door finally! He truly is good at everything. It feels emptier without you here, even though it hasn't been long. But you'll be back soon to fill the void. If you visit your parents, could you tell them I said hi? Mine too. I miss them greatly, but I know our work will make them proud. Satoru has been hanging around my room more, even after some tough training sessions. It's friendly company, but it's not you. He won't tell me why he's always loitering in our my room.

I forgot to mention that he asked me to heal his hand in my last letter. It's strange since he can do it himself, but I digress. It felt… nice to be wanted. Even Shoko seems gloomy! Uncharacteristic for her… Do you think she and Utahime got in a fight? Anyway, she's been helping me with my technique and some hand-to-hand combat stuff! It's a little hard to follow, probably because we train in my room. I wish I were granted a little more space…

Shoko also helped me finish our assignment- we got an A! I hope Yaga isn't too mad, but he's been getting quiet whenever I ask about you. Rather weird, but not as weird as Kento's haircut, right?

They're calling for heavy rainfall soon (according to that sweaty weatherman we liked to make fun of), but at least it's better than the unbearable heat. However, you felt the sting of summer more than anyone.

If you're home, eat more and say hi to my parents! They always tell me how you'll change the world one day.

With love,

One week since he defected…

Dear Suguru,

Sorry about this letter being so close to my last one, but I feel bad. Kento's been avoiding me lately despite not saying anything about his haircut. Then again, he's been avoiding everyone. Do you think he knows what I wrote? Hopefully not. As I write this, I can hear him shuffling back and forth. Inside and then outside. His heavy shoes hitting the stone walkways reverberate in my room.

Haibara, being gone, has started to settle in even though I wasn't as close to him as Kento or you. Is the work we do… is it worth something? It has to, right? Otherwise, you wouldn't be taking so long. This letter is a bit of a throwaway, so don't worry too much about responding.

With love,

One and a half weeks after he defected…

Dear Suguru,

Kento left. The rain is starting to get worse, but it's still manageable. Thankfully, Yaga gave me that empty patch near our dormitory to start gardening. I'm planning on planting some yellow roses, amongst other things. They remind me of you. The cicadas seem to be chirping a little louder every night. Maybe they're having nightmares about Riko, too.

With love,

Two weeks after he defected…

Dear Suguru,

It's been getting bad again. I wish you were here.

Do away missions usually take this long? I can't remember since Yaga has kept me holed up. I forgot to mention that in my last letters. Something about the higher-ups wanting to 'keep tabs on Satoru and me.' It's weird because Satoru can strut around, but I'm just confined to the campus.

However, he is kind enough to get me sweets whenever he heads into the city (he teases me about my sweet tooth, but he's worse!). I'll have to get used to telling him which ones I like before he spends his money, unlike you, who always got it right. I think Satoru just likes to eat my leftovers…

The days are starting to blur together.

With love,

Two and a half weeks since he defected…

Dear Suguru,

I think my technique is getting worse. You'd say otherwise and that I'm only getting better, and then give me a big hug. Is it creepy to say that I miss the smell of your shampoo? Probably. But it was so strong that it burrowed into my senses, like Satoru's six eyes. Since you've left, I'm unsure what to do with my free time.

I hope the break you are taking from school is refreshing. Heaven knows you need it. Hell, you deserve it. The tree we used to read under together is already yellow and threatening to drop its leaves, and the sun is starting to set earlier. Shoko offered me a smoke, and I felt…relief. Maybe I'll start doing that instead of thinking about how you take your tea. Sorry, I know how much you hated the idea of smoking.

My parents stopped answering my calls (they have been for a while). Even writing this feels like a waste, but I know you'll respond soon. Feel free to do it in person. My door is fixed now, but it is always open for you.

With love,

Your dear friend

Three weeks after he defected…

Dear Suguru,

It's been hushed lately. The cicadas stopped screaming, but I haven't. I walk by your room every day. It's weird. I used to get annoyed whenever you and Satoru were loud, especially when we had early missions. I would storm into your room, ready to be angry, but then you would flash me that beautiful smile, and everything else seemed to matter a little less.

Sometimes, I think you guys liked to make me mad on purpose, but I know it was all love. However, in your absence, I realized silence is worse. Suppose you cared, probably not since you haven't answered my letters. Shoko said my RCT has been getting better than before. People keep saying I'm an "asset" because of it. It's stupid because I don't feel like one. If I were, then you would have asked me to come with you. I wish you asked me to go with you.

Your dear,

With love,

Your dear friend.

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October 2007

Four weeks after he defected…

Dear Suguru,

Sorry about the short letter. Satoru is a little freer these days, so I guess I found something to fill the silence. Digimon is cooler than I thought! It's a little hard to understand sometimes, kind of like you. He's been spending more time in my room. I hope that doesn't bother you, considering our last conversation. Then again, we didn't talk much before you left, so you probably don't remember. Please come back soon.

With love,

Your dear friend.

Four and a half weeks after he defected…

Dear Suguru,

I have been missing the way you make me tea. So, I've been desperately trying to recreate it to no avail. Satoru suggested I add honey, and it made it almost too sweet. Still good, though. I realized on my third cup that what makes it special is you. But enough of that. Today, Satoru has been giving me tips and ideas on what to plant next season. He suggested some lily of the valley or some iris! I'm surprised he hasn't tried to convince me to plant some flowers that are as blue as his eyes. Granted, they are beautiful. Sorry, I should refrain from talking about how nice they are. He's been itching to tell me something, but I told him that we should wait until you come back.

With love,

Your dear friend.

Five weeks after he defected…

Suguru,

Satoru finally told me what you did. I'm getting that shaking rage again. There's a pain so deeply woven into my soul that my technique could never heal. I know writing these letters used to help us solve our problems when we were kids, but honestly? This feels a little ridiculous now.

There's not much I can say other than I hope wherever you are, there's eternal suffering- that whatever vomit-soaked rag curse you consume next swallows you whole. How dare you do this to our my family?

There's no way you could have known this, but after our weekly dinners, my dad used to go on and on about you. How you were 'the child they never had.'

How fucked up is that? I remember thinking, 'I'm here too! I'm here too!' They saw no value in something that couldn't clean up the fucking trash they created. That much was true. You saw that every time my father made ME cry, he made ME apologize.

Imagine a CHILD begging to be loved when that's all they should ever feel. I was just a KID. How burdensome it must be to demand what should come as second nature for parents. Their pure vitriolic energy seeped into my heart one night, and I considered destroying everything.

You knew that, and it was YOU who stopped me. Just like how you stopped Satoru after that day. God, you're a fucking hypocrite! Well, that doesn't matter anymore, does it? I was so close to getting their love back to how it was when I was six and didn't know anything. You stripped that away from me. God, you are such an asshole. Did you think you were doing me a favour? I keep replaying our last conversation in my mind. Each time, it's getting fuzzier, like a broken VCR tape. Rather than trying to remember how you smiled (which I am glad I am forgetting), I see this dingy aura. This whole 'monkey' talk is just the ramblings of a broken man, and I am not your repair shop.

You're a goddamn psychotic and selfish prick. How dare you murder all of those innocent people? What happened to us, making the world a better place? Was it all a lie? Just like another drunken kiss, perhaps? These stupid fucking letters never did anything when we fought as kids, and both of our parents made us you apologize like this.

You've poisoned us, me. There's not much else I can write other than I fucking loathe you. I always did. You were constantly parading around like you cared about me. You were saying that your 'Special Grade' status would never get in the way. How stupid was I to think that wouldn't get in the way because you were supposed to care for me? At least that's what you said to me repeatedly.

You were right about that. It wasn't your status. It was you. It was always you.

Yours,

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January 2008

Three months after he defected…

Geto,

I don't regret what I said in my last letter. As I write this, the trees which granted us shade now threaten to break underneath the weight of the snowfall. Which we have been fortunate enough to get. There are icicles that hang on my window sill. Clear and cold. It reminds me of how you're soulless and void of any emotion. Ten years of friendship have gone down the drain for a fucking pipe dream.

And what a waste! When I scream at night from the memory of you, Satoru comes into my room now. He holds me until the sun rises and I've calmed down enough or until I pass out from exhaustion. I hope this information wounds the depths of your soul. If you even had one, to begin with.

A friend

Three and a half months after he defected…

Geto,

I've been smoking more.

Almost four months after he defected…

Geto,

Satoru and I have been getting close. I'm unsure why I'm telling you this again or even why I keep writing these letters, but whatever. I've been going on more missions. Digimon, missions, sweets, and then staring at the dust that coats your bedroom door. It's a little repetitive and draining, for sure. But then again, so was loving you.

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February 3rd, 2008

Geto,

Do you remember when we first met? I do. This slimy worm thing smelled awful, and it kept following me! It had just rained, so I thought, 'Oh, maybe it's just the mud that was still on my backpack after that kid pushed me.' Which was a little annoying because I was on my way to that grandmother's house to tend to her garden. No matter how far I walked, the smell kept following me.

You were trudging behind closely, and with one quick gulp, there was an overwhelming relief in my body. It was as if Sisyphus was able to complete his task. Then again, you're more like Sisyphus than I ever will be. I understand that now. Maybe that's why you kept me away after what happened with Tengen. Or, I should say what didn't.

I'm sorry I didn't do enough back then and also that I ran away after you helped me when we were younger. Then again, when I tried apologizing for running away while braiding your beautiful hair like always, you said it was fine.

I don't know why I'm writing this letter, to be honest. Maybe it's because I'm feeling nostalgic.

From your former classmate,

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April 2008

Six months since he defected…

Geto,

I have been thinking a lot about our childhood, our parents' expectations and just things of that sort. In general, I've been thinking about a lot and nothing at the same time. Mostly, I think about how stupid I am to keep writing to a man who would rather burn the whole world than try to nourish it. This is more for me than it is for you at this point.

My garden has been flourishing (well, it's attempting to). But Satoru is very encouraging when things get overwatered, and also a little annoying about the technicalities of it all. Satoru twiddling his thumbs while I tend to my wisteria tree is comforting, to say the least. Even though I know he is just itching to help. Sometimes, I let him.

From your former classmate,

Six and a half months since he defected…

Geto,

I think we're planning to move somewhere else soon, just as roommates, though. It was Satoru's idea. He made a good point of needing a change of scenery. Also, he has been very comforting in general, so I don't mind. I know whatever house or apartment he decides to buy will be way better than the hovel you're living in (hopefully).

From your former classmate,

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May 2008

Seven months since he defected…

Geto,

The house Satoru picked out is very nice indeed. However, I expect nothing less from a clan head. My room is spacious, and it overlooks some lovely green spaces. It is a nice break for my eyes. Thankfully, it's still close enough where I can tend to the garden on campus, but Satoru was also smart enough to find a house where I can expand my green thumb. If need be.

It makes me miss our old town. When we had the warm summer sun kiss our faces, the promise of a better tomorrow. I almost asked Satoru if he wanted to visit whenever he had free time.

Although, he always makes himself free whenever I ask. But then I remembered that our youth, or lack thereof, is simply a ghost that will always haunt me. He's a good friend.

I still hope you're struggling. However, from what I have heard, you were able to take over the Star Plasma Church quickly. Or whatever you call it now. Congratulations. You've become everything you hate.

From your former classmate,

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July 2008

Almost one year since he defected…

Geto,

It's approaching that time again. Sorry. I meant the anniversary of what happened. I think I have been able to process most of the merger that never happened. You were trying your best to stay as righteous as possible. I admire that about you. I've always struggled with that, but I guess I did better at masking it than you.

I know I said this before, but I am genuinely sorry about not doing enough back then. I went ahead and got myself stupidly injured when I should have stayed with you instead of following Satoru. He could protect himself. I'm not saying you aren't able to, but I guess I wanted you to see how strong I am. I want to say that none of it was your fault.

Although the hardship you've created after what happened with Riko is.

From your former classmate,

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September 2008

One year since he defected…

Geto,

It's been more than a year since I last saw you. Summer came and went. Satoru and I were actually able to get our schedules lined up to visit Okinawa. It was a little painful, and I was reluctant. But you know him, it's hard to say no. He even checked the plane for anything that would be amiss.

'Cross my six eyes and hope to die, there's nothing here!' he told me when I was annoyingly asking for reassurance. I couldn't help but feel a swelling in my chest that I thought would never return. Once we actually arrived, it was a very relaxing time (He's finally figured out how to make my tea just how I like it).

It was such a nice gesture, and he was kind about the whole thing, so I bought him some sweets and wrote a note. He asked me if I would ever want to return, and I was about to insist that you come as well.

Luckily, we arrived back in Tokyo before the rain started to pick up. I've been getting assigned more missions, but this is what I've been working towards. Cleaning up your mess, no doubt.

From your former classmate,

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August 2009

Almost two years since he defected…

Geto,

One of the more fucked up things in my life (other than continuing to write letters you'll never read) is how even after all this time, you are the only person I want to talk to. Shoko is going to school to become a doctor soon; from what I heard, Kento is doing well and- Satoru is a good boyfriend and a better dad.

Someone who knew you,

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September 2009

Two years after he defected…

Geto,

I should have clarified in my last letter I am not pregnant. There are parts of my body that will always belong to you, no matter who decides to enter our home. Satoru adopted this boy and his sister. I didn't bother asking how or why we spent weeks tracking two orphans.

I know, even if Satoru won't tell me.

It's a little daunting sometimes being young parents. But I'm trying my best not to repeat any mistakes my parents made. However, there are certain moments when I can feel my father's venom come out to try to sting Megumi or Tsumiki. I would never let that happen.

I'm getting stronger for their sake. Maybe I'll try to cheat my way through medical school like Shoko.

From your former classmate,

══════════════════

December 22nd 2009

Two years after he defected…

Geto,

It's blistering outside but I will write something quickly as I am preparing for Megumi's birthday. Satoru and I have been making hasty preparations and a crappy cake (he insisted we tried when I said that I always wanted a nice homemade cake when I was younger) that will no doubt be replaced by one from a much better bakery. For a while, I was feeling jaded and jealous about how lavish Megumi's birthday party would be. But then I thought back to all of my birthdays those long forgotten years ago and thought about how I am so glad to have an opportunity to shelter a child from that experience.

In my reflections, I remembered your sleepy eyes and face smeared with an ice cream vanilla cake that your parents bought for me. I was fuming. Especially since my dad forced us to take a picture shortly after. I did a pretty good job of hiding it, though.

While moving to our new house, something fell out of my journal. It was the picture of that day. I'm sure you've thrown away your copy to forget your old life rightfully. Tsumiki came into my room right as I was about to put it away and asked who the dirty kid was in the photo. At first, I thought she was referring to me, but when I asked her to repeat the question nicely, she pointed to you. I told her the truth.

'It's just an old friend.'

══════════════════

March 2011

Three and a half years after he defected…

Dear Geto,

There are so many letters I have written, but I decided this is the best one for now.

Satoru is kind enough not to notice my fervent writings to a man I've been mourning who isn't even dead. I understand what you did. Sometimes, I'm even jealous that you had the courage to take action. You were trying in your way.

I have always felt like a passive observer, but now that love I carried for you burdens my family instead, with Satoru taking the brunt of it. I don't know if you remember, but you told me you wanted that. A family. Our family. Then again, I was half asleep, and I could have dreamed of you whispering that to me as I was lulled in the safety of your arms.

Wherever you are, I hope someone can give you what you deserve.

From an old friend,

══════════════════

September 2012

Five years after he defected…

My Dear, Geto,

I apologize for not writing that much. Then again, no designation could ever accurately describe our relationship. There's not much else to say other than I miss you. I finally cut my hair, not by choice. My son decided that gum belonged to my hair rather than a tissue thrown promptly into the garbage. I was annoyed, but then I remembered what a blessing it is to have him in my life. The ability to live in a world free of curses… I hope you're able to give it to him.

Maybe he'll inherit his father's technique one day. Perhaps not six-eyes since it seems a little exhausting. Once he's a little older, we'll find out, and then I will finally be able to return to work (despite Satoru's strong objections) alongside Shoko with less worry. Then again, if he were not to have a technique at all, I think that would be a greater blessing.

I do not wish to pass on the burden of our sins.

I just hope that if the time comes and he has nothing to protect himself from this unforgiving world, you will spare a child who has the wonder in his eyes you once had.

If I'm being honest, I knew you would never come back. I understood that the moment I slipped that note under your door only to find it unlocked and stripped clean. Still, a naive part of me kept writing and hoarding all the love I had for you in the hopes that you would one day return and take it all.

My garden, both on campus and at my home, is sprawling. In the spring, my children like to play in the large backyard pond. They're careful not to disturb the lotus that I've been careful to curate. Sometimes, I blink, and there are flashes of our childhood that I see. Specifically, summers which were spent in that grandmother's yard, tending to her vegetables and running errands. I hoped you would never tire of me dragging you along to this random grandmother's house, but deep down, I know you liked helping her as much as I did. It was a nice escape from the chaos of it all. I really started dreaming in those peaceful moments spent with you in that old house.

I have forgiven my parents, and now it's time that I try to accept what you did, along with the things I cannot change.

There has been an unnerving comfort in speaking to the ghost of who you once were. This will be my last letter for a while. Even though my writing, in general, has been sparse. I have a family, after all. I'm sure you do, too. I may be imagining things, but lately, these twin girls have been popping up wherever I go.

It seems stupid, I know, but they remind me of you despite their brown hair and large eyes. Both of which emit a warmth that I once felt whenever intertwined. In another life, maybe they could have been ours. Satoru listens to my concerns and is quick to calm me down. Ever since he's been checking in on me, I don't have nightmares anymore.

Sure, some nights are more challenging than others, but he whispers such lovely things that I can't help but fall asleep faster than I did with you. Sorry. That was an asshole thing of me to write. But I thought you would like to know I am being cared for.

You were my first love and best friend. My one and only.

With love,

Your dear, friend.

a/n: This is my first time trying this format, and I really like it! I might try it with another series of characters once I finish this. Also, the other chapters are written, but I am very anal about editing, so they're gonna have staggered uploads throughout March and April!

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naruto-imagines-and-headcanons · 10 months

Text

Naruto Love Languages (Shinobi)

Iruka Umino - Quality Time

Iruka prioritises quality time together more than anything. He knows what it feels like to be alone, and with Naruto he understood it even more. So he never wants you to ever feel like you're alone or abandoned. When you started dating he tried to see you at least once a day even for just a quick chat. And if you live together he is always ready to come right back home if you need him. It doesn't matter what he's doing, Iruka will make sure you know he's here for you no matter what. Expect a LOT of nice casual date nights throughout your relationship

Kakashi Hatake - Gift Giving

No matter how long you've been together, Kakashi can be a pain. His tardiness has stayed with him, being late to pretty much all your dates. It's gotten to the point where you tell him the date is happening an hour early so he's technically on time. And he ain't big on chores. But he makes up for it with his excellent gift giving skills. Pretty much every gift he gives you is perfection. Even though he's late a lot, he always brings you a small gift to make up for it (flowers, your favorite candy, charms, etc). Also, the moment you get into a new hobby or interest, expect related gifts falling in your lap for the next month. Kakashi wants to encourage your interests, he loves seeing the joy on your face as you experiment and try new things! And don't worry about money, he's doesn't mind spending it if it's on you

Might Guy - All of Them

Come on, he is literally Lee's clone. Of COURSE he's gonna be just as enthusastic with his partner. This man will literally do anything for you, if you need something done fast and perfect, he's your man. And be careful talking about things you show interest in. If you even imply you want that tea set from the store, you are gonna wake up with it on your nightstand. And god is he great at talking you up. Every morning is started with a speech about how amazing you are and how you'll face the day with power and youth together! Guy won't accept any negative comments you make about yourself, either. He shuts that shit down immedietely, and talks to you seriously and genuinely. Guy will always make you feel loved and beautiful, never forget that (don't worry you can't, god this man is loud)

Kurenai Yuhi - Words of Affirmation

Kurenai is incredibly caring and emotionally connected with you. She is a naturally empathetic person and with you it's clear. She always takes into account your personal opinions and desires, and never makes a decision about your relationship without your input. Your emotions mean a lot to her, and she makes it clear. Kurenai is always there to

Asuma Sarutobi - Quality Time

He is similar to Shikamaru of being a bit sluggish, just not on the level of his prodigy. Your love life is on the lowdown, but that isn't a bad thing! You like just spending time calmly with him without all the fuss. No pressure inducing grand gestures or giant surprises, with Asuma it's easy and stress free. His favorite way to spend time is just sitting and talking with you, and if you smoke, taking smoke breaks are a definite couple's activity. If you ever feel like you're hogging his time or being clingy, he'll quickly shut you down. Asuma wants to spend his life with you! Why do you think he shows up at your house so often with a rose?

Anko Mitarashi - Acts of Service

Anko is an independent woman who knows how to take care of herself. She doesn't require you to do anything for her, if you want to it's cool but she doesn't expected. On the other hand though she shows a lot of loyalty to you and always stands by your side. She respects your independence and autonomy and tries to not push too hard, but if you ever need anything she is right there in a heartbeat. Honestly, whenever you do anything she is watching intently for any sign of you needing help. You can't grab a cereal box from the top of the fridge without her already making a game plan if you fall

Tsunade - Physical Touch

With most people Tsunade isn't too fond of physical contact (well, when sober at least). She is used to being sexualized for her body by pretty much EVERYONE, so it feels like people just take advantage of her. But with you, she knows you don't see her like that. You see her as a human being! A hot human being, but a human being nonetheless. So when she's with you she adores hugging and cuddling and smooching. You are just so adorabl ein her eyes! Holding hands is an absolute must. In her eyes you are only one worthy of her hand... and massive tits. Just be warned that when she drinks she gets reeeeeeeeeally touchy and pervy

Jiraya - Words of Affirmation

I can already see some of you questioning my sanity, but hear me out. Jiraya is the famous Pervy Sage, this man loooooooves bodies. Boobies, booties, if you got it he wants it. So yes, physical touch is a BIIIIIG part of his relationships. But surprisingly, most people don't know that when he's in a serious relationship, he gets very sincere and sweet. He always is there to life you up, and pretty much compliments you all the time. Even when you feel like you look like shit, this man finds a way to make you feel like a supermodel. Jiraya isn't afraid to show his affection in public either, and proudly says "I love you" and calls you pet names anywhere you go (no matter how embarassing). But uh... yeah he's still gonna have grabby hands though, so get used to that

Hashirama Senju - Words of Affirmation

Hashirama is such a bright person and just a joy to date. He is basically a ray of sunshine no matter the weather or situation. Optimism is his religion and follows it closely. His main goal in life is to make you feel happy and loved. And you're gonna feel it god dammit. Every morning you are awoken with a sweet kiss and "good morning". He likes to tease you by saying you look better than ever, even though you clearly look like you woke up from a 3 year coma. Your pouting and annoyed face always makes him giggle like a kid, it's so cute! Throughout your relationship Hashirama will always find a way to convince you to look on the bright side of life, especially if it has to do with you. No matter how you perceive yourself or your skills, he compliments you with full genuineness. This man loves you so much, just... so much

Tobirama Senju - Words of Affirmation

Unlike his brother, Tobirama is muuuuch more tight lipped. He's stern and sharp with his words, even with you. It was a bit off-putting at first, and you used to wonder if he even liked you. One day it came to a head and you approached him and asked him outright if he hated you. This is one of the few times his composure broke, and he instantly shot the notion down. After a heartfelt conversation, from that day forward you payed more attention and noticed little things about him. You notice that when he talks to you his voice softens ever so slightly and he tries to use less intense wording. Occasionally when he walks by you'll hear a quiet compliment in your ear. He never forgets to thank you for every little that you do. And when you're alone he'll even soften up just a tad and admire your beauty. Tobirama doesn't show his affection outright and openly, but if you connect with him and noticed the little things he does, you'll truly understand his feelings

Minato Namikaze - Acts of Service

Minato is a gentleman through and through. He's gonna treat you like royalty, I'm talking laying his coat over a puddle so you can walk over it (don't worry, you eventually convince him to just let you go around the puddle instead). Obviously he is verbally respectful and sweet, but he really shows off with his usefulness. He loves to do chores with you or cook together and just talk for hours on end. If you're craving a certain food he is ready to take a stroll to the store and get it for you no questions asked. And when you're in public you can bet he's using his reputation to get you guys some special benefits. Every restaurant has a table for you guys set and ready, and store venders give you great prices. Plus NOT A SOUL will even try to bother you. They know who your love his, and they know what he will do to them. So enjoy those privileges~

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Konoha 12 + Sand Siblings | Shinobi & Founders | Akatsuki

#Naruto #naruto headcanons #naruto x reader #naruto imagines #Iruka Umeno #Kakashi Hatake #Might Guy #Kurenai Yuhi #Asuma Sarutobi #Anko Mitarashi #Tsunade #Jiraya #Hashirama Senju #Tobirama Senju #Minato Namikaze

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 8 months

Note

WIBTA for kicking my brother out?

Long story short, last year I (24) got my own apartment, it's literally only a 1 bedroom; I got it myself without a cosigner, I paid an entire year of rent up front, and I paid a triple deposit because it's my first lease anywhere, and I've never asked anybody to help me pay any of the bills, I even moved all my furniture in completely by myself without help from anybody including my mom or her stinky husband (32, ew) or my brother (19)

I lived here by myself for about 4 months when my brother and my mom's stinky husband got into a fight

(it was Stinkys fault, he was starting shit with all my moms kids and my brother was just the only one aggressive enough to put him in the hospital like he deserved, but my mom defended him and lied to the court so he wouldn't be deported, he's her only source of income atm because of her disability)

anyways, my brother went to juvie for a few months and the courts say he and Stinky can't live in the same house together anymore, since this happened a few days after he graduated high school, they decided to not try him like an adult for the sentence, BUT if he breaks the restraining order, he will be tried like an adult; so my mom asked if my brother could live with me for a few DAYS so she could get her own place, for her and her kids (including the brother STILL IN MY HOUSE), and divorce Stinky-mcgee

I agreed to do it under the radar because I would have to pay a huge fee to add him to my lease, but it's against my lease to have him here this long without adding him...and my apts are trying to rebrand as "luxury" to raise rent, so they're kicking people out left and right for very minor offenses like smoking cigarettes indoors or hanging clothes on their balcony, things TECHNICALLY against the lease but REALLY stupid. (and charging new people more than what the people being kicked out were paying)

they will 100% evict me if I don't pay to add him to my lease if they find out, so I can't even call the maintenance man (he's a snitch, he already snitched on me for having more pets than I said I did). So I can't get my AC fixed and its 110°F outside rn...if I get evicted, I don't have any savings and I will be homeless, BUT ANYWAYS

it's been 7months, and my mom hasn't even LOOKED for an apartment,

my brother has 3 jobs and a car, but instead of looking for an apartment he spends all his money on his girlfriend (20), and video games, and shoes (I get that he's still a teen, so he wants teen things), but he won't even pay for the grocery bill if I ask (I only ask for groceries, the CHEAPEST bill, since I work with food, I rarely eat at home anyways, so it's mostly HIS groceries) and he always says he doesn't have enough money

I am at my fuckin limit tbh,

but I'm not sure if he could get an apt the same way I did with his conviction history (he's been to juvie like 6 times for different things), and my mom has been evicted so many times for fighting people that I doubt she could co sign if they look into her renters history; and my older brother (27) won't co sign or take him in because he says my brother isn't reliable enough, and he doesn't want to take the financial hit if my brother gets arrested again and can't pay rent... (the other kids are still school age, so they don't count)

he's old enough to go to a shelter, but we use to live in a shelter for YEARS after a tornado took out our house and our dad, and he took it the hardest, so I think living in a shelter might be a trigger for him(?)...so I kinda feel bad for suggesting it(?)

WIBTA if i just packed his shit, put it in his car, and told him to go to either his girlfriends house or a shelter?

(I kinda feel shitty for even thinking of it tbh)

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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kimbapisnotsushi · 1 year

Text

i started writing this back in the last week of december going on into january bc we had so many karasuno bdays back then so uhhh TECHNICALLY this is a late bday post honoring like four people LMAO but let's go!!

during kageyama's first birthday at karasuno he gets a mysterious series of texts from an unknown number that goes like > happy birthday > not that this means you're forgiven > just thought it was the right thing to do > i know it's your first since. well. you know > you don't have to text back or anything!!!! > fuck fuck fuck just pretend this never happened BYE

he brings up it up two years later when he, kindaichi, and kunimi are better friends and kindaichi buries his red face in his hands and screams and kageyama isn't sure why

kunimi pats him on the back and tells him not to worry about it

ennoshita has a playlist that is solely just like white noise and creaking sounds and generally just things that would make you shit your pants alone in the dark and when asked why he just goes "it's the only way i can feel anything inside"

tsukki will NEVER admit it but he ASPIRES to be the level of deadpan that ennoshita is

tanaka: "so . . . why do you like him again?" ennoshita, watching a video he recorded of futakuchi walking straight into a lamppost bc he was playing pokemon go: "he makes me laugh"

no joke i think ennoshita is a dateko celebrity bc everyone knows about the guy that futakuchi kenji pines over bc futakuchi kenji is just known in a million ways and maybe like 90% of them are Not Good

a third-year has futakuchi by the collar and they're like "all right PUNK get ready to have your lights punched out you'll be seeing stars when i'm done with you" and futakuchi just sighs longingly and goes "ennoshita has eyes like stars . . ."

daichi is that type of upperclassman who knows very single friend of his juniors' but not in like a cool older sibling way he does it in a cringefail modern parent kind of way

kogane used to be soooooo scared of him before finding out what a huge dork he is

actually kogane isn't scared of asahi bc he's so used to aone and asahi cries over it

(sorry for plugging in dateko so much i just genuinely think they have such a fun relationship with karasuno i ADORE it)

onagawa: "man idk how you do it" narita: "do what?" onagawa: "being the only normal person on your team"

yeah no narita is carrying the weight of the world as the only person with the brain cell on karasuno

sometimes it's ennoshita but he's been dead inside since first year so

suga tells the first years he knows martial arts but all he really did was go to one (1) judo club demonstration during his second year of middle school and somehow managed to flip the captain over by sheer luck and never tried again

for takeda's birthday everyone teams up to get him a really nice fountain pen, a classical poetry book, and a quality bottle of sake. for ukai's birthday tsukki leads a powerpoint presentation on why smoking is bad for you and that he really should stop, backed up with everyone else standing behind him with their arms crossed and nodding along

okay that and they also get him a really cute apron (embroidered with crows!!) for him to wear around the store and a bag of good coffee

kiyoko has all - and i mean ALL - the snacks from the local convenience store on a tier list and when the vbc asked how the fuck she managed to do that she just went "my track team was a lot weirder than you guys"

actually the reason why daichi asked kiyoko to be the manager wasn't because kiyoko was the only one with no club activities going on it was because she gave asahi a hair tie when nobody else would and asahi had been trying to befriend her since (and also return said hair tie) but was too nervous to make the first move

asahi: "noooooo daaaaaaaiiiichiiiiiiiiii i caaaaaaaan't i'm so awkward and embarrassing!!!!" daichi, with all the confidence of a fifteen-year-old constantly winging it: "it's okay, i've got this!"

yeah he's just as surprised as you are that it worked out

especially considering he pitched it to her like a used car salesman

kiyoko carries a lot of hair ties with her when she starts just for asahi and when he leaves the team she doesn't stop bc she tells suga, daichi, and the second-years, "he'll come back, just wait and see"

THEY WERE FRIENDS TOO!!!! THEY WERE FRIENDS TOO!! THEY WERE FRIE -

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thenightfolknetwork · 3 months

Note

Due to a combination of bad genes and bad luck, I suffer from various physical and mental difficulties and pains. Technically I count as disabled, but the term has never felt right for me; it doesn't FEEL like the problem is in my body and brain, even though I know it is, it feels more like the world rearranges itself to be just a bit harder for me than for other people. This isn't something I've talked about much, it's always seemed like it would be horribly rude, plus I have more important issues to work on with my therapist than "how much a particular word does or does not match how I parse my subjective experience".

Then I came across an expression, and for the first time, something felt like it fit. "Cursed by a wizard". It's not that I lose energy quickly, it's that I've been cursed with fatigue; to give one example. I know it's not literally true. Even aside from my diagnoses and symptoms and treatments, a year or so back I got screened as part of a workplace health and safety initiative, and no curses. Still, it's not like the language we use is literally true all of the time; expressions exist for a reason.

You know how it is, whenever you find something cool and new, you want to share it with everyone. Nobody else cared as much as I did, of course, but general reactions were polite, "I'm glad you've found something that works for you". Except for one person, who immediately got a Look on her face -- the kind you get when a foreigner says a word they don't know is a slur over here, or when someone bad-mouths a person they don't realize is nearby -- and changed the subject.

I'm not going to change how I think about myself. "Cursed by a wizard" is a useful mental framework. However, my question is whether it should stay solely within my own mind. I'm worried now that it might be insensitive to people who've actually been cursed, or to wizards.

Thank you for getting in touch, reader. I have one small point to make regarding the start of your letter, particularly regarding the word “disabled”.

To be clear, you are absolutely entitled to your own personal relationship with the term, and I don't mean to suggest that you need to adopt it if you don't feel it reflects your experience. However, I don't agree that “the problem” is in your body and brain. It is, as you say, in the way the world is arranged to make life that much more difficult for you.

A framing I have seen from some disability activists is to speak of themselves as disabled by society, rather than by their condition. They don't consider disability to be a trait in and of itself, but a condition put upon them by an ableist society.

I don't know if this framing is a helpful one for you personally, and as I said, I don't wish to tell you how you “ought” to describe yourself. But I wanted to mention it as a possible alternative way of thinking, in case it proves useful to you.

But that, I know, was not the point of your letter. Unfortunately, reader, I don't have a clear cut answer for you. People who have been cursed are not a uniform group – neither their experiences, nor the way they speak about those experiences, are identical.

The fact is, yes, some people will be offended by your use of “the wizard's curse” to describe your experiences. Others will find it an expressive, even entertaining way of viewing your situation.

You also run the risk that some people will simply not understand the metaphorical nature of your statement, so please be prepared for those well-meaning folk who hear this and immediately start recommending salt baths and smoke cleanses.

I can reassure you that this is not a term that carries any particular historical reason to avoid its usage – it isn't comparable to such out-dated idioms as referring to public outcry as a “witch hunt” or the use of the phrase “Frankenstein's monster” when speaking of a messy, difficult situation, and implicitly associating reanimation with negativity and failure.

Instead, it is rather like the English language use of the word “slimy” to mean “dishonest” or “morally corrupt”. Certainly some people see the usage as offensive, but it isn't actually rooted in any specific anti-liminal sentiment and those voices are the minority.

In fact, some people argue that it is more offensive to assume “slimy” must somehow be associated with people of viscosity. But I think we are getting rather into the weeds of what is, to be honest, a largely online debate with very little real-world application.

In short, reader, it is up to you how you proceed. You need to decide for yourself whether you're comfortable with the ambiguity of your language and with the diverse ways you may be interpreted.

There are rarely any clear cut answers on the topic of language, and it may be that your feelings on the matter change over time. But the fact remains that only you can decide how best to describe yourself, and only you have the power to make this decision.

#the nightfolk network #monstrous agonies #answered

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beelsbignaturals · 11 months

Text

💀DEMON FORMS: SATAN🔥

AN: for some reason I am incapable of seeing Satan in a romantic light so I hope all the Satan kissers are at least a little satisfied. I tried my best. If you like this and want to see my Levi and General Demon Form Headcanons, check out the obey me world building tag. 💚💚💚 also thank u michi for helping w the trigger warnings ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Inspiration for this part: @waltnut and like the one pic from @breakfastwiththedamned of him with all the fire n stuff

TWs: Body horror, mild injury, DEATHLY SKINNY, skeletal body, demons looking demonic, SIR THOSE R UR BONES, skeletons, burn mention.

First, in general, Satan had the hardest time learning to control his form. He's really good at it now, though!! He's right up there with Mammon and Lucifer in terms of self control.

● 1.5 Satan is weirdly hot to the touch. It feels like touching a hot stove. Ouch. His teeth are actually pretty tame compared to, say, Levi. Four fangs in his upper jaw, two on each side. The rest of his teeth are like. Uncomfortably straight. A dentist would cry tears of joy. One might say they are…. Like a military cemetery (ref) Overall, 1.5 Satan isn't really that wacky. His bones are a lot more prominent, though. And being around him is enough to make you irritable. You will stub your toe and suddenly want to fight God.

Satan, completely engrossed in his book, had no sweet clue he was about to trip down a flight of stairs. You, being an upstanding citizen, grab his arm to pull the demon back. Bad idea. Hissing in pain, you pull your hand back, bewildered because you didn't expect to be burned of all things! Satan apologizes for unintentionally scalding your hand, but.. it technically is your own fault. Protip: Don't do good deeds in hell.

● Level 2. In-game demon form plus add some snazzy hooves, and also His Bones Glow. Could be mistaken for a radium girl because of the eerie green light emitting from his body at all times. It's worse in the dark. This man is a GLOWSTICK. His teeth get sharper, and his nails grow into long curved claws. Also, his tail is made of vertebrae. He has a habit of dragging it slowly along the floor when he's deep in thought. Makes a very creepy clack-clack-clack sound.

The power had gone out while you were in your room. When you tiptoe out into the dark, the last thing you thought you would see was Satan, standing there looking like he is being lit up from within. Startled, you jump what feels like ten feet in the air, but in reality, it is only a few inches. Satan lets out a combination of a death rattle and a laugh.

● Level 3. His skin is extremely sunken in. You can see each and every bone and joint. His arms and legs are disproportionately long, and he has to hunch over to get through doorways. If you touch his skin in this form, you will need medical attention for the severe burns. His eyes are black, sunken-in pits. Though sometimes in the dark, you can see a faint green light. Every movement he makes causes his bones to make the aforementioned clacking sound. When Satan is especially pissed off, green smoke and fire billows out of his mouth, nose, and eye sockets.

A strange noise can be heard throughout the house as you struggle to breathe through the smoke. Satan had gotten mad because a prank against Lucifer failed miserably, causing the curse to backfire onto himself. Now, there is a tall, skeletal blonde who can not stop hiccuping. Each spasm of his demonic diaphragm sends fire spewing from every orifice. It's not until you manage to make it into the room, coughing profusely, and remind him of your cat cafe date that he begins to calm down.

● Level 4. He grows taller the more angry he is. 40 foot home depot skeleton who?! All his bones are black, blending seamlessly with his horns. The skin has a grayish tint and is stretched so thin in some places that it's translucent. His bones glow brighter based on how angry he is. Basically, he's a giant glowing skeleton. His body temperature is so high that if he touches anything flammable…. Grab some marshmallows. Satan is real reason the library of Alexandria burnt down. Someone bumped into him and... the rest is history. I don't have much else to say about it. Big grumpy skeleton.

The second the fire alarms go off, everyone panics. The fire alarms at RAD are enchanted, so only real emergencies can set it off. You barely have time to push your way through the door when a giant skeletal hand breaks through the window. Wait a damn minute... you know that eerie green glow... you somehow manage to fight your way through the crowd of screaming demons and succubi. Carefully, you step over the broken glass, peeking your head out the window. "Satan?" You call out softly. "Wanna talk about it?" A giant obsidian skeleton that towers over the school looks down at you, the flames dancing in the empty eye sockets dim ever so slightly. You count that as a win. The air is suffocating its so hot, and anyone in their right mind would be running for their lives. Good thing you aren't in your right mind. You sit on a desk as the Avatar of Wrath shrinks about a foot in size. He still has to crouch to be eye level with the window. But you can tell he appreciates the offer from the way Satan is paying extra attention to make sure his breathing doesn't roast you alive. How sweet.

#om! shall we date #obey me worldbuilding #obey me satan #obey me satan x reader #obey me x reader #shrimp writes

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jekyllnahyena · 4 days

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remember that lil COD oc that gets pissed about Price throwing away his cigars half smoked?

this is him now. I blame Neyo for this whole thing @galacticgraffiti

(more info under the cut)

right, so, Johnny boi dies and Ghost starts to, eh, lose it? Reg isn't in the picture here, so, yeah. Ziese, as a person that only ended up here by accident and has a pretty firm grasp on recognizing 'bad mental state', very much wants Ghost off the team, because homeboy is going from 'weird murderous fucker' to 'actual liability' at this point. Ghost starts talking to Johnny and Ziese goes 'NOPE! He needs an exorcism!' But Ghost is still sorta functioning during missions? And people would rather keep him where they can see him than somewhere else.

Cue to Ziese being send to Ghosts location, my man is technically here for extraction and transportation after all, only to find Ghost completely gone and sitting in the muddle of a bloody mess, eyes empty and unseeing, being very rude to some corpses he is the maker of. Ziese tries to snap him out of it, it comes to a fight during which Ghost is very much out of it and barely functioning, and Ziese ends up accidentally shooting him through the head.

Ghost becomes Ziese's first, real kill and it messes with him bad. Not only did he kill his teammate, he also killed 'The Ghost'. Word gets around, nobody knows what really happened, but the callsign Ziese suddenly holds a weight he never wanted. He gets stuck in a position he doesn't know how to escape and decides to sucumb to his fate, inadvertedly starts turning into a husk of his former self and goes full 'if ya can't beat them, join them'. His reputation grows, he becomes a creature his friends and family could never recognize again, not that they've seen him since his first kill because he wanted to keep them safe, and all in all its pretty fucked up.

In the end, he becomes everything that he feared Ghost to be during his last few weeks, hallucinates Ghost a lot and is a terrifying and lost creature that should just be put down.

something something, circle of violence, becoming the thing you hate, the outsider becomes the insider, won't be able to recognize a chance of an escape anymore because this is a tragedy

#ziese #simon ghost riley #cod oc #its always the fucking funky characters that become weird and messed up #neyo wrote some great stuff about ghost going off the rails and i thought #'huh. wonder what that would be like to watch from the outside' and Ziese was just sitting there #hating everything about the military and it represents and i went 'perfect' because this is the most miserable fate he could have <3 #this is the bad place #actually #this is the bad place au #if i ever draw for this again #ajekyllsart #cw blood

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ask-the-tower-bros · 9 months

Note

Hello brothers! Whatcha you two think about the others that was/are in the tower?

"that's a question I can answer."

PEPPINO:

"Real stand up guy. We wouldn't be here without him. He's got a kind heart, even if he's a bit anxious."

"I owe everything to Peppino Spaghetti. Without him we would have been trapped in that tower forever."

GUSTAVO AND BRICK:

"Proper sweethearts, the both of them. You can always trust a guy with a good bushy mustache."

"Gustavo is a very nice man...gnome...person. Always makes sure to ask how I'm doing if he sees me. He takes good care of Brick."

MR STICK:

"He's a character alright."

"I observed him a bit in the tower. From what I gathered he seemed like not too bad a guy behind the snarky businessman persona. Gerome's right though, he's certainly a character."

PEPPERMAN:

"I like quiet. I like keeping my thoughts to myself. Pepperman does not like either of those things. His heart's in a good place. Do peppers have hearts?"

"he was one of the few tower inhabitants that had no qualms talking to me. But he often didn't shut up. He painted me very nicely sometimes, though."

THE VIGILANTE:

"He keeps to himself, I can respect that. We've shared a smoke and chatted before, we get along well."

"I never really saw him. And when I did, he was rather unnerved by the whole hivemind thing, so he kept away."

THE NOISE:

"He's loud and messy. But he's Noisette's boyfriend, so he can't possibly be all that bad."

"He is absolutely all that bad. He loved to vandalize the parts of the tower I controlled. And his art was not very good, I'm afraid."

NOISETTE:

"She's a darling. I spend a lot of time at her cafe, even if her food isn't the most edible. She just radiates good energy."

"She'd always take the time to talk to me back in the tower. Brought me food as well. I consider her a friend."

FAKE PEPPINO:

"...weird. Eats some food scraps off the ground and makes my job easier, though. Cheers to that."

"I spent a lot of time in the tower watching him and providing him shelter. Poor thing is utterly lost, metaphorically speaking. I heard he's got a job at Peppino's now, which is good for him."

PIZZAHEAD:

"He was my boss, technically. I don't have nothing nice to say about them."

"Mark my words, if I ever catch a whiff of that greasy clown, I'll mash his head into silly putty and then some, and then I'll-"

"I don't think they want to hear all the painful things you want to do to them... Even if it's justified. Sorry bruv."

#pizza tower #ask #answered #gerome pizza tower #pillar john #pizza tower peppino #ooc: I'm not tagging all of them man I'm lazy

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mcverse · 1 year

Text

CͨнⷩAͣРⷬᴛⷮEͤRͬ ᴛⷮWOͦ

Dᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴋɪss ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴍᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴍᴏᴜᴛʜ?

✧ Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki x Shape-Shifting! Chubby F! Reader

✧ Warning: profanity, bakugou being an ass

Previous/Next

Admittedly, you may have been a tad dramatic.

It was the heat of the moment; your brain was practically mush so you weren't thinking straight. Yeah, you were hurt, but it technically wasn't the end for you—at least not yet. And the damage was already done, which would forever be imprinted in your memories and heart. There's nothing left but to carry on in the best way possible...

By snuggling up in a shit ton of blankets with the a/c cranked up and your eyes glued to a colored screen. This is your remedy after a rough day and as of approximately 4 hours ago, you needed it. Everyone has different ways to cope with their problems. Unfortunately, procrastinating and stuffing your face with junk food, which you will later regret, is one of yours.

Not that you see a problem with that. After all, eyes locked on of nothing but the free will team is a great remedy and show in general to watch.

Honestly, what were you thinking? Thinking back at it, you couldn't believe you fell for that mess. Being so hung up over a single boy when there are smoking hot men putting in work against some monsters right in front of you, which you can watch anytime. Sure, they don't know you actually exist, but that's what FanFiction is for.

You groan, shaking your head to force the bad thoughts away. But they linger in the back of your mind, waiting for a moment to strike again. There will always be a moment in your life because it is filled with nothing but disappointment—or rather, you're the disappointment? At least, that's what everyone has been telling you.

A familiar ding, signifying you received a notification on your phone makes you jump slightly. You glance out of the corner of your eye, watching as the phone lights up one moment and quickly darkens the next. You grow hesitant about answering whoever it is for multiple reasons.

One being you're watching a show and it's getting good, two being you don't want to talk to anyone right now, and three being that if it's one of your online friends, they are sure to figure out something's wrong and you don't want to talk about your ongoing issue yet.

You sigh after a long debate with yourself and pause the show before reaching over to the bedside table. Gripping it in your hands, you put in your fingerprint which successfully unlocks it. Pulling the notification tab down, you frown when you see a text from an unknown number. Curiosity gets the best of you and you click on it.

To say you were confused is an understatement. You didn't know this person and you certainly weren't this "shitty hair" character he was speaking of. Which is rude to say to someone, by the way. You were hell-bent on saying something back, the will to put someone in their place hitting you hard after what happened today and to stick up for the stranger, but you didn't.

You click the power button, blackening the screen. Reaching for the remote, you unpaused the show and easily start to get back into the feel of it. However, the stranger on the other side of the phone wasn't allowing any of that with their constant messaging. Frustrated, you snatch your phone up, press one message, and unlock it.

Your mouth drops as you see the burnt book with a small flame still lit on top of it. Unless this person isn't secretly a terrorist, this has to be his quirk. Either way, they both sound terrible. For Pete's sake, he blew up someone's school book! Who does this asshole think he is? Without thinking much about it, your fingers start typing a reply.

You gulp loudly as you stare at the text you just sent. Your pulse is pumping faster than before, proof that you're getting nervous, if your clammy hands didn't already give that fact away. You're in disbelief that you said that. A very bold move on your part.

There's no way he's going to send a picture, not with how demanding he was about you sending one. And you sure as hell aren't going to send one to him. Him being a stranger only part of the reason and you looking how you do being the main reason.

You don't even know why you care to know what he looks like or why you're still talking to him. Or if he's even a guy?? This is all too confusing. You curse yourself for not ending it up front, but this guy... he's persistent so it's not entirely your fault.

Your train of thought breaks when a photo shows up on your screen. You gasp lowly, instantly shocked that a guy like him is talking to you. He's gorgeous, even with a mean glare. If anything, it defines his overall features.

You pause briefly, watching the cursor blink and bite your bottom lip. He seems strange, but he's cute. Should you do as he asked? Take a leap of faith? Who knows, maybe he'll like you for you and wouldn't care about your looks.

But a little nagging voice in the back of your mind is telling you that that isn't true and reminding you of what happened earlier that day. Your heart flutters and not in the good way. That nagging voice is right. You can't be stupid like before. One heartbreak was enough, you can't handle a second one.

You quickly turn off the read receipts on your phone as more and more texts from this guy start rolling in without a break.

You frown as more texts like those come rolling in. Clearly, he's not used to not getting his way. Rolling your eyes, you decide to put your phone on silent before focusing back on your show.

The world sucks. He'll get over it too.

Previous/Next

✧ Series M.List

✧ Main M.List

Thanks for reading! Like & reblog is appreciated

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sam--morgan · 8 months

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𝘀𝗮𝗺'𝘀 𝘄𝗶𝗳𝗲 》𝒔𝒂𝒎 𝒅𝒓𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒙 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓 - Chapter seven

Sam's wife m/l here !

The boys and y/n stood over the snowy terrain as Nate looked at the map. Y/N hugged her jacket closer to her body to keep the cold out.

"Well.." Sam started as he scanned the area. "Rafe's going all in, isn't he?"

"Yeah.. while you were gone he was going batshit crazy for that treasure," Y/N said as she watched the smoke coming from her mouth.

"Well, they're all concentrated around the cathedral, so that's good..." Nate said as he looked in his binoculars. "Because we are going to have that graveyard all to ourselves." He said panning over to the place that they were heading to.

y/n took out her walkie-talkie and turned toward the canyon that lead to the waters. "Sully." She said calling out for the older man.

"Yeah." She heard his voice crackle to life through it and she continues, "We're good to go here." She said with a smile as she saw him poke his head out of his plane. "Okay, kid. Happy hunting." He said waving to her and she smiled.

"Last chance to come with." She heard Sam say next to her and wrap his arm around her waist.

"Yeah, well, unless you can find me an escalator, I think I'll pass." He joked through the walkie talkie and y/n giggled.

"All right. We'll see you in a few," she said waving before putting the walkie-talkie back on her belt loop.

"Well... let's go pay our respects to Captain Avery," Sam commented as he hopped down the little ledge with y/n. "A Scottish cathedral. Strange place to bury your treasure, no?" Sam said taking the lead as Nate and y/n followed him.

"Not really. I mean, by the time Avery would've sailed here, the place was already abandoned." Nate commented.

"I guess that's true. Plus, with the massive bounty on his head... it'd be a good place to hide." y/n chimed in as she walked next to Sam.

"So... what happened between the two of you and Rafe?" Sam said awkwardly as he turned around to look at Nate.

"Ah... I couldn't deal with him... and I'm pretty sure he'd have enough of me." Nate said and y/n nodded her head agreeing. "I was still coming to grips with your, uh... "death," and with his frustration from not finding the treasure... Well, I'm pretty sure he was ready to kill me by the time i bailed."

"Ha. Imagine what he'd want to do to you now." Sam said with a little chuckle looking at y/n with a small smile. "What about you hun?"

"Same with me but i was kind of kicked out due... to me slowing them down and i just went on another job." y/n said shrugging her shoulders as she placed her pockets. She wasn't technically lying but she didn't want to tell him just yet, and Sam gave her a look. "Can we get a move on? I'm freezing my tits out here." Y/n complained and started to walk again getting feelings in her legs.

"I told you to wear proper attire and not some leggings... though I'm not complaining at all.." She heard the suggestiveness in Sam's voice and she rolled her eyes.

"Keep your eyes on the treasure pretty boy. We're not done with this just yet." She sassed and looked back at him Nate sighed

"Sam, listen," Nate said as he knocked his brother out of his trance. "He's ruthless. I mean even more so than when we teamed up with him." Nate explained.

"Noo... what made you think that?" y/n sarcastically said, remembering Vargas death. He was kind of brutal but she friended him and she was sad to see him killed in cold blood. Nate ignored the sarcastic remark from the woman and continues "I mean, I've heard stories."

"Trust me, me too. All the more reason I don't feel bad about any of this." He stated and they continued making their way through the rusty terrain, and Sam spoke up again. "So is it just so how you remember it?" He asked his wife.

"Oh, the cathedral grounds?" She asked as she looked at him and he nods his head. "Pretty much. Although it's been too long, it's a little hazy." She stated as she tried to remember what it was supposed to look like.

y/n was the one who took the lead as they slid down a path and stopped over the ledge, and Sam looked over it and whistled. "That's a long drop."

"Yeah. We need to find another way down." Nate said as he went to another sliding part but this one didn't have a ledge. They then heard a bomb go off in the distance. They quickly made their way down and saw equipment everywhere.

"Huh... what do we have here?" Y/N said checking out the equipment as she walked around.

"It's excavation equipment," Sam said walking behind her keeping a close distance between them.

"Shoreline?" Nate asked in disbelief as he examined the stuff and y/n and Sam walk back to him saying "What?" at the same time. "Look," Nate said pointing at the crate that had their logo on it. "I thought they were by the cathedral!" Nate exclaimed they heard voices and Nate cursed under his breath as they got down.

"Look, they're here!" They heard a mercenary say as they hid behind a cover. Y/N took out her bow and arrow as she started to take down each mercenary with the help of Nate and her husband. When they finished, they were out of breath and got whatever ammo that was dropped. "okay, we're good." Y/n said as she retrieved her arrows that weren't broken.

"Yeah, nice to meet you too, shoreline. Seems like they were expecting us." Nate said as he took the lead again.

"Kind of figured that when we stole the crucifix away from them." y/n said walking behind him and Sam behind her.

"...And like they're searching away from the cathedral." Sam chimed in.

"Which means we should get to that graveyard pronto." Nate said and y/n and Sam agreed, as they made their way through the snowy terrain Sam said "Why didn't you guys search beyond the cathedral?"

"Well, we did... a little. But this place is so big, without know where to look... it's like shooting in the dark." Nate joked and y/n shook her head with a sigh, and they heard another explosion.

"Or like blowing shit up in the dark," Sam said and they turned the corner seeing a camp, and they jumped down. "What is this place?" Sam asked looking around.

"The monks had several living quarters... the main one being by the graveyard, of course," Y/N said as she walked next to him, and she heard him chuckle.

"Location, location, location." he joked which earned an elbow in the side.

"You are unbelievable." y/n said chuckling and he wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"More shoreline equipment," Nate stated a little far off.

"At least no shoreliners." y/n said moving away from Sam's arm, and they searched the camp. Y/N went up to the door and saw something in the box.

"What do we have here?" Y/N said picking up a stick of dynamite before turning to the boys. "Hey boys, look what i have found." She said with a smile as she held it up. The boys looked over to her as they were over by a crate.

They walked over to her and smirked as they all said at the same time "Dynamite."

"Hey, be careful with that stuff?" He said to Nate and y/n who were stuffing some more in their pockets.

"You're telling me to be careful?" y/n asked her husband as she looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Hey. I can't be worried about my wife." He said with a slight smirk as Nate turned around and threw the dynamite at the door exploding the already brindle wood and making y/n jump slightly.

"Jesus fuc- Can you give a little warning next time?" She asked as she rubbed her finger in her ear to get rid of the ringing.

"That was... very loud. Hopefully, they didn't hear us." Sam said as he looked at the now open area.

"Yeah, they heard that. I sure as hell won't be hearing for weeks." Y/N said talking a little loudly.

"Well, hopefully, we just blend in with the other explosion," Nate said as he through the blown-up doors and saw that there was an opening through the roof.

"Look there's a way up through the roof but it's too high for a boost though," Nate said examining the roof before running back to the crate with others following.

"Brace yourselves!" He said as he got behind the cover before he threw another stick of dynamite at the door making it explode. "There ya go. Take that, door." Nate joked as he started to push the door.

"Boy... you showed that door." Y/N joked and Sam chuckled at her joke before they followed him. Nate pushed it down on the ground and was about to go around the corner but they saw more shoreline showing up through the hole they saw.

"Shit! Shoreline! Hide!" Sam said as he pushed his wife down gently and Nate got behind cover.

They walked through the tall grass and tried to stealth kill everyone but they had to use some of their weapons to take some of them out.

"All right. Nicely done.... that could've been bad." Sam said out of breath as they took out the last shoreline Nate went to go push the yellow crate.

"Yeah, tell me about it... let's get it off here before anyone checks in on them." Y/N said before helping Nate push the crate faster to the hole. Once they got it by the hole and up against the wall, they climbed on top of it and out of the hole.

They walked over to a grappling hook branch and y/n was the one who did it this time. "Got it." She said as she swung back and forth before grabbing on the side of the rocks.

"Whoa be careful there hun," Sam said from the ledge as Nate went next.

"Don't worry about me, babe. Just worry about you getting over here." She said winking at him earning a chuckle from him. "Come on boys. We have treasure to find." Y/N said climbing up to the top. Nate went next and almost fell.

"Shit!" He yelled out as he jumped to the next ledge.

"Nathan, you okay?" Sam called out to him as he watched from the ground.

"I'm good... Just follow y/n." He said reassuring him and Sam shook his head following after his brother as the both of them went to where y/n was at.

Then Nate took the lead as he hooked the grappling hook again and swung across the wall. making it to the ledge.

"Whoo. All right, you think you can do that?" Nate said from above the ledge.

"What are you talking about? I taught you that move!" Sam shot back making y/n laugh.

"All right, let's see it then." Nate challenged with a smirk and Sam looked at y/n.

"Go ahead, sweetheart." He said with a smile and she rolled her eyes slightly. "What? I need to catch my breath."

"Uh-huh. This is why you need to stop smoking." Y/N commented and she did what Nate did easily and stood over the edge. "All right 'sweetheart', it's your time now." Y/N mocked back and she watched him do it as Nate went to another grappling hook.

"There, you see?" He said to her as he stood next to her and she leaned up to kiss his cheek.

"Glad you didn't fall to your death." She teased and she quickly followed after Nate he chuckled as they still heard the bombs going off in the distance getting closer as they progressed.

"There's a ladder out of reach," Y/N commented as she looked up at the ladder.

"All right, come over and I'll give you a boost," Nate stated to her and she nodded her head as she quickly went over to him and he boosted her up. He did the same to Sam and they tried to find a way to pull him up.

Sam found a ledge where he can pull Nate up as y/n looked around checking their surroundings. Nate joined next to her and saw the cathedral in the distance.

"All right, there it is. The monks' dorm. Just a hop, skip, and a jump away." Nate stated and y/n and Sam groaned.

"Ah, don't jinx us." Sam groaned as he rubbed his neck already feeling the pain kicking in as they started to slide down the hill to get to the lower level.

"Ah! Whoo, burns a little." Nate stated as he brushed his pants off.

"It feels like I was sitting on a nail couch," Y/N stated as she winced and brushed her butt off.

"Well, those are fun," Sam said chuckling to himself as they made their way to another sliding part.

"I'm still getting gravel out of my underwear." Y/N groaned slightly and she did it anyways hopping on the ledge afterward.

"...The next, he's paying us to double to wipe them out." Y/N heard a mercenary say and both of the men stopped next to her.

"I can do this all day," Sam stated and y/n shushed him pointing to the mercenary below them.

They saw that the mercenary split off and y/n jumped down and landed on the guy that was trying to take a leak and the others jumped down after her.

They snuck into the tall grass and took down some mercenaries with stealth. When the ones that were proving to be difficult y/n took them down with her bow and arrow.

When there were no mercenaries left, y/n took her time to look for her arrows that were unbroken so she collect them and Sam followed her.

"That was... kinda hairy," Sam commented out of breath as he made his way across the bridge and y/n nods her head in agreement.

"Someone was bound to hear all that. C'mon, let's get a move on." Nate said as he takes the lead he went to the ledge and jumped up where he was grabbing the rocks. He made enough room for the two of them as he continued to climb.

"Ladies first." Sam offered as he looked at her with a smile she rolled her eyes but smiled anyways.

"Such a gentleman." She said with such sarcasm as she followed Nate, and Sam followed after her. They went around the cliff before landing on the ground and y/n took the chance to use her grappling hook this time to swing across to the next platform.

They climbed up to where the ground was and set down their feet before stretching.

"Right beyond those walls," Nate commented as he looked at the wall structure in front of him. They slide down the gravel way and turned around where they saw three mercenaries and they took them out easily.

"Where to next?" Y/N stated when they took out mercenaries and Nate was already leading the way.

"Guys! This way!" He yelled back as he hopped to a platform and the two couples followed suit. They got to a sliding part on more gravel and y/n sighed not wanting to slide more.

"Catch your breath. There's more sliding up ahead. This one's looking a bit more dangerous." Nate said mostly to Sam as y/n was already next to him. Nate leaped once Sam was next to him cursing the whole way down and nearly missing the ledge.

"Okay, if he did it, I can do it," Sam said softly next to his wife.

"You have fun with that. I'll just watch you from back here." Y/n said patting his back before he made the leap and slid against the ground.

"Whoa. Whoa." He said as he slide to where Nate was and laughed as he stood up. "It's better than bungee jumping hun! It's your turn." He called back to his wife who was sliding down already.

"Ah fuck!" She screamed as she almost fell off the edge but she caught her balance off the side. "That was close.." She said sighing in relief.

"I wouldn't allow you to fall," Sam commented as he placed his arm out to catch her, and she gave him a grateful smile, and they continued.

"So, this is what the two of you been up to all these years? Jumping around ruins?" Sam asked as he trailed behind his wife and brother.

"Yeah. That and... Getting shot at." Nate answered strained as he jumped across a cliff, and y/n continued "Blown up. Punched. Kicked. Also, don't forget getting drugged."

"All right. All right. I get it." Sam said as he heard too much but Nate and Y/N continued climbing and sliding before they made it to the top and y/n admired the view for a couple of minutes.

"Haha. And that's it." Nate said making the moment ruined as Sam walked up to y/n.

"Ah, not quite. Still gotta climb higher to cross the ravine." Sam commented before kissing y/n's forehead and following after Nate who climbed up more.

"All right, I hope that we're done sliding for a while. My ass is full of gravel." Nate said as he made it to the other side.

"Ah, don't jinx it. I still have PTSD with that shit." Y/N muttered as she went after Nate with Sam following her as they heard more bombs going off in the distance, and they made it to another sliding part and y/n groaned loudly. "I SAID not to jinx it!"

Nate went first as he slide down and used his grappling hook and made it to the cliff laughing. "Stuck the landing!" He said calling back to the couple, and they made their way across as well seeing a door.

"Hey give me a hand," Nate said to Sam as they started to lift the part of the gate that was stuck.

"Alright. We got it. Go!" Nate said to y/n straining as they held the door open and y/n ducked under, holding the door open for the both of them to get under.

"And we're here," Nate said as he started to walk forward looking around as Sam dropped the door.

"Yes we are," Sam said laughing as he stood next to his wife with a smile on his face.

Y/N looked at both of them with a smile before saying. "Let's go grave robbing boys."

#nathan drake #sam drake x reader #samuel drake #uncharted 4 #uncharted

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