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ayyliencat · 1 month

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Hey there, just needed to say something quick. ALL of this misrepresentation about schizophrenia everywhere is ableism. People that say “schizophrenia is spiritual”, “schizophrenia is satanic”, “schizophrenia is demonic”, “schizophrenia means that you have demonic entities attached to you”, “schizophrenia means that you are in spiritual warfare with demons”, “schizophrenia just means that you are going through a spiritual awakening” is just so frustrating for people who ACTUALLY have this mental Illness or suffer from psychosis. It all comes from people who don’t even HAVE this illness or experience these things. It is dangerous to tell people who have or don’t have schizophrenia/ schizoaffective disorder, people who are on the schizo spectrum or people who experience psychosis that what they are experiencing is real and is caused from external forces or that they are just in a “spiritual awakening”. Stop spreading your misinformation on this mental illness and do some research, your ableism is showing. This goes to all of you new age spiritualists that say “people with schizophrenia just experience the world differently than us” No, we are suffering from psychosis/hallucinations or delusions. It is a mental illness, not what your idea of what schizophrenia may seem like to you. I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder, I’m not haunted or “woke” I’m mentally disabled, It is a mental illness PERIOD.

#mental illness #mental health #schizoaffective #voices #sensory hallucinations #audio hallucinations #auditory hallucinations #hallucinating #hallucinations #schizophrenia #schizo spectrum #schizospec #mental awareness #ableism #psychosis #delusional #stop the stigma #spreading awareness

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autisticdreamdrop · 9 months

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this user experiences hallucinations

#our userboxes #userbox #userboxes #hallucination #hallucinations #sensory hallucinations #auditory hallucinations #visual hallucinations #schizoid #schizophrenia #schizoposting #schizo spectrum #schizophrenic spectrum #schizoaffective #actually schizophrenic #schizoaffective disorder

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justanotherstardrop · 8 months

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this user experiences hallucinations

#our userboxes #userboxes #userbox #this user #hallucinations #hallucination #auditory hallucinations #visual hallucinations #sensory hallucinations #schizo spectrum #schizophrenia spectrum #schizophrenic spectrum #schizoposting #schizoaffective #schizophrenia #actually schizophrenic #psychosis

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convexicalcrow · 1 year

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Cub heard only screaming. He curled into himself in the darkness, hands pressed against his ears. The screaming didn't stop, though. He couldn't think. Couldn't process anything. Just curl into a ball and listen to the screaming as his skin seemed to spark with electricity.

-

Cub heard only screaming. Only this time, it seemed... No. It wasn't the Vex. They'd abandoned him. Cut off the infected vessel to save Themselves. Cub didn't blame them for that. No, the Vex wouldn't come back for him. Perhaps he should just let the screaming darkness swallow him. It might be a better fate than facing the Vex again.

-

Cub heard only screaming as skulk veins wound tightly around his body, holding him still. His limbs were in strange positions, though he wasn't sure if the pain he was feeling was physical or if his brain just expected the pain and decided he should feel it anyway. Veins wound around his throat and he was sure he felt them penetrate into his brain again. A heavy weight pressed down on top of him. Perhaps he was the cause of the screaming.

-

Cub heard only screaming. Everything felt like it was on fire. Felt like he was drowning in lava. The putrid stench of skulk was even worse when it was burning. Cub retched a little, knowing he'd never get that smell out of his nose. He felt wings on the back of his neck, but- no. It couldn't be the Vex. They'd severed a limb to save the rest. That was fine. The Vex could sacrifice him if he was too much of a danger to them. He'd made his peace with that long ago.

-

Cub heard only screaming. Only this time, the voices were muffled and indistinct. He felt like he was drowning, even though he could feel no water. He wasn't sure he could feel anything. Just... sinking. He was sinking. The mud had found him in the swamp and he was sinking into it. It was soft and quiet and he closed his eyes, feeling something embrace him as he gave up. The sweetness on his tongue was memories, right? His brain conjuring up what Vex magic tasted like as what felt like a pair of arms held him close, cradling him gently. His brain was fuzzy. Was that a kiss on his cheek? Didn't know. Too tired to think more about it.

-

Cub heard only laughter. Vex laughter. Memories again, right? That had to be it. He felt dazed and exhausted. Heard Scar's voice in amongst the laughter. Smiled. Maybe Scar had found him. That was a nice thought. He closed his eyes and drifted off.

-

"Cub? Can you hear me?"

"That you, Scar? That's nice. I'd like your voice to be the last I hear before I die."

"Oh you're not dying, not on my watch! The Vex won't allow it! Just hang on, okay? I'm getting help. We can get rid of the skulk. But I think there's some magic only you can perform. I'm not skilled enough with the Vexnos and the infinity stones. So don't you dare die on me, okay? Because I need you. The Vex need you. Jellie needs you. Just hang on and listen to my voice. I hope the Vex magic is helping give you a bit of energy back. I'm not sure if it can do that! But the Vex told me to do that. You've been through a lot! Just hang on though, Bdubs and Joe are on the way. I need their help for this final stage. Then we need you to do some magic with the stones, okay? Promise you'll hang on for me?"

"What...? I don't... Okay? Sure? I can hang on for you, Scar. I just feel so tired though. I dunno if I'm up for any magic. You do it. I wrote all about the stones in the grimoire. You can work it out from there, right?"

"The Vex said it has to be you. There's just no way for us to know the true extent of the corruption. Only you can do that. Just-"

Scar's voice fell silent, but not in a troubling way. Cub suddenly felt like he was floating, and maybe he could see the surface of the water, with light glistening through. He blinked. Vex magic pooled on his tognue and it was like ambrosia. His body was singing as Vex magic pulsated gently through him. Maybe he wasn't dying after all.

"Is that better? I hope it's better. I'm not as good with this magic stuff as you are. I just do glamours and bake cookies and make magic crystals! You know the deeper stuff that I dare not touch like the stones. Like Vexnos. I-I can't do that magic. You need to do it. So just. Come back to me, okay?"

"I'm here, Scar, don't worry. I'm not going anywhere."

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dreamdropcompanions · 1 year

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psychosis?

yes.

we are on the schizo spectrum. and have been for as long as we can remember.

we experience visual, audio and.. wdk what its called.. sensory hallucinations?? ones where you feel something..

we take antipsychotics and have on and off since middle school.

meds don't work

some hallucinations are fine.

they're nice

they're safe.

they're comforting.

some hallucination?

so scary.

so hard.

so stressful.

causes anxiety

and panic attacks.

and all that bad stuff..

#blurry #group post #psychosis #schizo #schizo spectrum #schizoid #schizophrenic #schizophrenia #schizophrenic spectrum #actually schizospec #schizophrenic disorder #schizotypal #schizoaffective #hallucination #hallucinations #auditory hallucinations #visual hallucinations #sensory hallucinations #physical hallucinations

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fantasy-store · 2 months

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OngietuGustatio + OngietuOlfactio

[OngietuGustatio + OngietuOlfactio]

ongietugustatio, like ongietuvisio, ongietuauditio or ongietactio, is an ongietusio related to gustatory delusions, including gustatory hallucinations. the delusion of a taste, texture or otherwise paletted sense in the mouth. this term is to aknowlege the disconect between reality and ones expirience, not to trivialize, romanticize or otherwise idealize such.

ongietuolfactio, like ongietuvisio, ongietuauditio or ongietactio, is an ongietusio related to aromic based delusions, including scent-related hallucinations. the delusion of a scent, smell, or otherwise aromic sense. this term is to aknowlege the disconect between reality and ones expirience, not to trivialize, romanticize or otherwise idealize such.

etymology:

gustatio = latin for tasting / coming from degustatio = latin for tasting, also coming from latin gustus = taste/tasting

olfactio = latin for scent/smell

about ongietunem(link), ongietuauditio/ongietuvisio(link), ongietactio(link)

no spoons for ids, sorry

radqueers, transid/x stay away from my terms thanks.

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scrawlingschizophrenic · 3 months

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Sensory hallucinations are a trip. My sandwich tastes funny, like the cheese had gone bad a while ago. I don’t make much of my own food anymore, and I’m glad for that, because it’s a lot easier for me to believe those around me than to trust my own perceptions right now.

I’m still going to eat it. I’m hungry, and I know it’s safe because I saw the expiration date before it was made. But it unnerves me to know I can. I can taste it, and my brain keeps screaming at me that I’m eating something rotten, that it’ll make me sick. But it hasn’t stopped me. It’s weird to know that even when it comes to self preservation, I’ll ignore every flashing warning light so long as no one else notices.

#schizophrenia #sensory hallucinations #hallucinations

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artkaninchenbau · 9 months

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An AWS comic

#My art #For the record I am not a medical professional and as far as I know AWS isn't even something you can be diagnosed with???#It's so hard to describe what the two sensory hallucinations really *FEEL* like #Like the time one... You know how a dramatic slow motion scene looks like in an anime?#It's like that but if you made it a 60 fps interpolated version of it #It is an absolutely bizarre feeling #Meanwhile the hyper awareness and everything feeling intense feels like how a fisheye lens shot in an anime feels #No I could not be bothered to try to figure out how to draw that for this comic #For the record I haven't actually had those visual hallucinations since I was a small small child #Hell I don't even think I had any hallucinations in my teens at all like #The sensory ones just kinda started happening again in the past 7 years or so?#Also the swelling sensation I've only had once so far. Usually I get the hyper awareness sensation #(Also sometimes I get this intense feeling of swaying when I go to bed but that might not be an AWS thing??)#(Like there's other things that could make you feel like you're rocking on a boat when laying down so I didn't include that)#No I have never talked to anyone about these hallucinations because for the longest time I didn't know what they were #And they are like. Harmless. Like I'm 100% aware they're just strange sensations but not real at all #They last max 15 minutes if even that long and they happen like super rarely #Only once have I had the hyper awareness be SO INTENSE it made me feel distressed #So like. It doesn't really affect my life at all? So why bother with it?#Also IDK if I could even go to a doctor and ask about AWS and have them know what that even is #And even if I could as far as I know there is no treatment for it so like. Whatever #As long as I don't start having distressing hallucinations or visual hallucination's I'll be fiiiiiine

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ispyspookymansion · 6 months

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i dont mean a shadow of a tree waving or something that catches your eye, and i dont mean ghosts really, i mean you see something and believe it to be a bug or something and look and theres nothing there. this happens to me at least once to multiple times a day, but i dont know how common that is

#its like the mildest of visual hallucinations. but worse is the sensory ones where i think i feel something on me and i look #and its nothing but i still feel it like i cant trust my eyes :(#kora.txt

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museofthepyre · 4 months

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your art really fits your appearance... are you the real life sydney sargent? i'd be freaking out if you were sydney sargent ahh

Well, yes.

I could explain my multi-year spanning selfhood/ ID situation in depth… buuuut we would be here for hours. Short answer for all intents and purposes is: yes.

#fictionkin is… a word. not sure it fully describes my experience.#it’s worse/ more extreme than that (save me let me out)#even outside of that though #I am a GNC trans man. long dark hair with light blue eyes. Autistic. BPD. ARFID (safe food is… buttered bread.) chronically ill AND #psychosis and hallucinations (I am on meds for it 💪 look at me go)#deathly pale and inescapably sick #and has motherly issues. I spend most of my time in the forest. I was a warrior cats kid. I’m goth by music taste and wear dark everything.#I prefer skirts and dresses for sensory reasons. dark and earthy tones.#I talk too much and overshare (exhibit a: this)#my SPECIAL INTEREST has been decomposition and dead things for YEARS #so I adore worms and mushrooms and everything which will one day help me return to the earth #I had a few pet worms & isopods before CHNT even released. I love. worms.#however I don’t do first aid now. I’ve devolved to mortuary science/ post-mortem preservation.#as you can imagine… discovering CHNT was horrifying for these reasons.#as once again- everything I listed here has been the case long before I ever found CHNT.#also I seem to only have chemistry with morally dubious men send tweet #oh and also vivid memories yk that too that’s kinda important yk #guys I’m afraid to post this.

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celestialcass · 5 months

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tactile hallucinations of indescribable slimy textures making maps in your skin, you are missed by the sentient alien spaceship you were forcibly ripped out of

#rottmnt #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt technodrome #rottmnt fanart #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #donatello #tactile hallucinations #sensory issues

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ayyliencat · 1 month

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Hey there 😊 just wanted to say a thing quick.. 💖

If someone has schizophrenia/schizoaffective disorder or on the schizo spectrum, please do not say that they are gifted, that they’re clairaudient, telepathic or anything of that sort. I know you’re just trying to make sense of it all but please 💖✨don’t✨💖

It feeds into their hallucinations/delusions that they are experiencing and that is DANGEROUS to someone who is hallucinating *them already thinking that the voices are REAL, that they actually can read minds or that they are thought broadcasting and everyone can read their minds all while actually believing it to be real* and can lead to them thinking they have a gift and can lead to them putting themselves in danger by thinking that what they are being told while hallucinating is REAL because they “have a gift” or are “gifted”. I’ve been told this before early on when I was first diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder about 5 years ago I had to find out on my own with my diagnosis that not knowing what’s real and what is real is just apart of having this mental illness. We are not being haunted by demons or ghost’s, it is a mental illness just like anxiety or depression, and unfortunately we suffer from hallucinations, catatonia, depression, and labile affect(Inappropriate involuntary laughing and crying) amongst a lot more symptom’s, just like you take meds for anxiety and depression we also have to take medications, it is a mental illness and should be treated as such, with knowledge and treatment can help someone get clarity about their recovery and can help reduce their symptoms. Thank you for reading 💖✨😊

#mental illness #mental health #schizoaffective #schizophrenia #voices #audio hallucinations #auditory hallucinations #sensory hallucinations #hallucinating #hallucinations #psychosis

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whump-me-all-night-long · 7 months

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The Kind Commander

AI-less Whumptober Day 3: Isolation

Masterlist

TWs: military whump, multiple whumpees, isolation, sensory deprivation, noncon drugging, hallucinations

---

Not long after Captain Hawk left Lex and Isaac, some more Skoaxian soldiers came in, roughly undoing the chains from their ankles and yanking them to their feet.

Lex grunted softly as Isaac yanked against one of his soldiers. “Do I look like I’m in any shape to run right now?” he snapped and Lex winced. All that got Isaac was a cuff on his head and an even tighter grip on his arms.

Lex kept his mouth closed as they were harshly led out of the tent and into what appeared to be the heart of Camp Ironglass.

People were bustling all around them, not just soldiers, but cooks and butchers, carpenters and smiths, washerwomen and seamstresses. Lex thought he could even hear the distant, cheerful screams of children from across the camp. As the soldiers led them through the camp, Lex noticed people stopping to stare at them. He saw faces twist into frowns and bodies stiffen; for a reason he couldn’t quite explain, his face suddenly felt hot and he hung his head, letting his hair fall across his gaze.

How many? Lex wondered silently. How many people here knew people that I have killed? Are their mothers or fathers, sisters or brothers, lovers, friends, children, even? Are they here?

Before Lex’s mind could wander too far down that dark hole, the guards were leading them towards a small building on the outskirts of the semi-permanent camp. As he laid eyes on it, Lex’s legs involuntarily locked up, causing one of the soldiers to stumble and glare at him.

“No,” Lex muttered under his breath.

“Oh, yes,” the soldier he’d tripped replied with a smirk before tugging him forward.

The Skoaxians were infamous for their ruthless warcraft strategies, and one of the most well-known were their isolation chambers. Lex shuddered as he remembered the blank eyes of one survivor of the chambers when he was still a fresh recruit. Those empty eyes had haunted his nightmares for weeks afterwards.

A few feet away, Isaac was also starting to struggle against his own guards, and it was only then that Lex noticed how deserted this part of the camp was.

Growing resigned to his fate, Lex let the soldiers drag him forward, down an incredibly short hallway before putting him in one chamber and Isaac in the one across from him.

The whole building was incredibly damp, with an unnatural breeze sending shivers down Lex’s spine. The only light was filtered thinly from the outer door, and, once the cell door—a solid metal thing, with only a tiny slot that could be locked from the outside—there was no light at all. Lex couldn’t even see his own hand from a few inches away from his eyes.

Carefully stretching out his arms, Lex repeated Bray’s words of wisdom quietly: Know your surroundings. Based on what he could feel, the isolation chamber was really only about five feet by five feet; the entirety of the walls were made of the same thick, impenetrable metal as the door, muffling all sound except for the barest hint of a whisper-like sound every now and then. There was absolutely nothing inside, except for a small metal bucket, which Lex flushed at the thought of.

Slowly settling his back against one of the far corners, he kept an eye on the door- or, at least, where he thought the door was. Honestly, the chambers were made so skillfully that he couldn’t even really tell where the door and wall met, that’s how seamless they were.

Wrapping his arms around himself, Lex set to staring into the darkness, quickly losing hope that he’d be able to withstand the isolation and sensory deprivation.

-

It could have been a matter of minutes or hours, but soon enough, Lex started seeing things.

The darkness started playing tricks on him, making him see movement out of the corner of his eyes. He would whip his head around, trying to follow it, only for it to disappear seconds later.

Soon after, it was his ears that betrayed him. He couldn’t tell if he was actually hearing voices, or if the voice in his head had grown deafeningly loud.

Lex let out a soft groan, squeezing his eyes shut—no, that didn’t stop the phantom movements—and pressing his hands over his ears to the point of pain.

How long can I do this?

-

At some point, food appeared in the slot. All it was was a stale chunk of bread and a small cup of lukewarm water.

As much as Lex’s sandpaper-like throat begged him to drink the whole thing, Lex made himself take only a few small sips before attempting to eat the bread.

Who knows how long they’ll go in between giving me more water? The last thing I need is to die of dehydration.

After eating what he estimated to be about half the bread, Lex set it to the side with a sigh, allowing himself another small sip, noting how the water tasted vaguely metallic.

Eyes widening, Lex let the cup thud on the ground.

Shit.

-

Lex wasn’t quite sure what the drug was that they were lacing the water with, but whatever it was was incredibly powerful. And putting it in the water made it unavoidable; although, to be fair, Lex didn’t know how long he could go without eating, especially if the food were to be sitting right in front of him.

At first, the drug only seemed to amplify the tricks his brain was already: creating shadow and colors in the corners of his eyes, causing him to hear phantom voices, giving the darkness a physical weight that seemed to press down on Lex until he felt as if he was suffocating.

But, after what Lex estimated to be a half dozen “meals”—although he had no clue what that translated into days—it was as if the drug had grown more powerful.

Now, Lex was seeing full-fledged shadow creatures prowling towards him, reaching out with wickedly sharp claws and teeth. He was hearing distinct voices: those of Bray, his mom, his dad, Isaac, the rest of his squad. They were calling for him, begging him to save them, screaming in agony.

Most of his time, now, Lex spent curled up in the corner, making himself as small as possible, with his eyes squeezed shut and his hands clamped over his ears, nails digging into his skin and carving throbbing crescents.

After an eternity, stuck in his own silent hell, Lex heard… something. He lifted his head, hands falling down to curl protectively in front of his chest, eyes wide and bewildered.

Slowly, so slowly Lex thought he may actually have finally lost it, the metal door groaned and creaked, until a sliver of light was visible.

Hissing, Lex looked away, his eyes having grown used to the total darkness, as a familiar pair of boots stopped in front of him.

“Let’s have a chat now, shall we?” Captain Hawk said, and Lex could hear the smirk in his voice.

---

Taglist: @ailesswhumptober @theelvishcowgirl @misspelledwitch @i-eat-worlds @shywhumpauthor @the-dump-of-whump @cypher-antiquity

#ailesswhumptober2023 #leigh writes #the kind commander #whump #whump writing #private lex winch #private isaac lidgett #captain ulysses hawk #military whump #multiple whumpees #isolation #sensory deprivation #noncon drugging #hallucinations

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convexicalcrow · 8 months

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(part one)

Cub was aware of nothing but the face of the Warden he'd built into the wall of the farm. He couldn't hear the shrieker, couldn't hear the screaming in his head, couldn't hear the Wardens dying, couldn't even feel the skulk dripping down his arms and neck nor the cold slowly seeping up through his legs as he stood on the shrieker. The trance was deep and unexpected, leaving him still and utterly focused on the wall in front of him.

Only three words passed his lips. The burning dark. The burning dark. Whispered, barely breathed, eyes glowing with skulk, smelling the rotting skulk, feeling the hot air from the burning lava, the eerie silence of an ancient city, the soft chirrupping of skulk sensors, and the slow, careful footsteps of a Warden. He didn't know if what he was seeing was actually The Burning Dark. It didn't matter. They were the vibes the skulk were sending him. He'd find out soon enough when he was finally able to go down there.

In the midst of the trance, when he couldn't even hear his heart beating, blackness - blindness - suffocated him, and the only heartbeat he could hear was that of a Warden, slowly approaching him, crying softly as it moved. Was he afraid? Was he aware that he was afraid? It was hard to tell, really. Closed his eyes as the Warden didn't blast him out of existence, but held him close instead, its strong arms pinioning him in place.

Its belly was... solid? Or felt that way. Cub's face was pressed against it, and he could feel the edges of the ribs slightly digging into him. But it was the souls, the swirling lights he could see, the faces contorted into screams of horror that captivated him. They were the only light he could see, and he raised a hand, curious what would happen if he reached for them.

The burning dark. The burning dark. He whispered it to them. They whispered it back. The Warden was breathing slow and long. Cub felt safe. The burning dark. The burning dark. The urge to break in was so very strong in that moment. To sneak down from Tango's storage room to break in. To go to where he was being called.

Cub sighed, winced a little in pain, as he felt the Warden's claws sink into his back, giving him his answer. No. He wasn't going anywhere. He would go to the burning dark when the time was right. Until then, it would remain his obsession. He closed his eyes, let the skulk overwhelm him, felt himself sink deep into the body of the Warden, another soul aching for rest. He would not wake there, but elsewhere.

#hermitcraft #fanfic #cubfan135 #skulk cub #decked out 2 #possession and trance #hallucinations #obsessive thoughts #sensory deprivation #sensory illusions

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emiliosandozsequence · 2 months

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my mother in law bought this candle that me and robyn hate (it makes us nauseous and gives us a headache) and it was burning in the living room this morning and i have Not been able to get the smell out of my nose since 😭

#and it smells so so bad 😭 me and robyn cannot understand why she likes this scent at all #anyway i've had a stomachache and a headache all night even tho i KNOW the scent is probably just a sensory hallucination #since the candle has been blown out for HOURS at this point #emilio.txt

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didderd · 9 months

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wen u dreams go into existential crisis mode

#but th dream lowkey had a rly good plot #like squid games #but in the afterlife #but u don't do well with heavy plots #n u wanna write it down but u know u'd probably have a hard time making it into anything anyway #(usually i wake up from existential crisis dreams still in th middle of th crisis n nothing feeling real and it's vry jarring and scary #but thankfully i think th crisis part had passed by th time i woke up this time)#(those dreams don't happen often but when they do it's scary #confused tf outta me as a kid)#(n they usually come with th. physical hallucination? of tiny thin wire/string wrapped around me? not a good sensory lmao)#didderd talks

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