it’s giving. Red Scare / Witch-hunt / Patriot act

This is actually such dangerous legislation. It is literally political censorship.

the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.

three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.

two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.

their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.

one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.

i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.

i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.

and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?

you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.

a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.

someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.

What are some censorship rules that you feel you could most comfortably poke fun at without feeling like you could get in some kind of trouble or ending up on some watchlist for doing?

I guess the FOSTA/SESTA censorship law is a pretty miserable piece of legislation that has had a net negative impact on society since day 1. If I could find something funny about it, I'd definitely go for that one.

Although, you can make fun of it directly without being put on some watchlist, though keep in mind this is the law that laid groundwork for online surveillance/suppression of sex workers, and is basically the blueprint for some anti-abortion legislation proposals that would make it illegal to discuss obtaining abortions online. so if some people have their way, someday you COULD get put on a list for giving tips and info online to those seeking abortions. but i digress.

hoping that my wide eyed whimsy and neurodivergent charm attracts boys to me

played stardew valley for the first time and i wish so badly it was enjoyable to me 😔 i understand the appeal and how easy it is to like sit down & end up playing it for hrs if i was a different person but it is not stimulating enough to me and one thing i HATE in video games is not being able to move fast like having to walk everywhere really slow is the number 1 thing that will make me immediately stop playing a game 😭 i played for like an hr & again i get the appeal but i always said that stardew valley and animal crossing would not be the kind of game for me & i was right 😔 and yet so badly i want to be a butch lesbian tending to my farm and to romance one of the pretty women i just don’t know if it will be playable to me………

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I have a legal question but idk who to ask so I'm posing it to the general public:

Its illegal to clock out and continue working right? If something like that were to be reported, would the employer or the employees get in trouble for it?

Part of me is team "leander is like that to everyone" bc he also plans to recruit MC into his Bloodhounds in the future ("not yet"). Despite knowing the Bloodhounds for years he isn't close to them. Makes me think he ups the charm and seduction to anyone who may be of use to him to get them to pledge their allegiance.

He was working up a new story. Something to really gild his reputation. A nobleman’s wife, this time. Lady something or other. Probably better not to think up a name, that could get him in trouble later. I’ll take it to my grave and all that. Mysterious older woman. Terribly wealthy. Frisson of danger. Husband couldn’t get it hard any more. They’d swallow it whole. Antaup, you dog! How do you do it? Easy when you made it up. And a lot more fun than having to actually persuade women to take you to bed. He’d no patience with women at all.

— The Trouble With Peace by Joe Abercrombie

He wished Jurand and Glaward were there. He’d always known what they were. Nothing to be proud of but they were good men still. Leo could be so bloody stubborn. Once he had an idea in his head, there was no shaking it free.

Having feelings about aroace!Antaup again and how much I just adore (x the power of 1000 suns) his borderline misanthropy. He's so calculating, but also blasé and half-assed, there's no guilt or angsting about his inability to actually sleep with women, as if it's completely normal to make this shit up. And granted, it's largely boys being boys boasting about their make-believe conquests, and action =/= attraction, but there's none of the insecurity or guilt I would associate with someone who feels like they're actually incapable of getting a woman. Antaup fully believes he could, he just doesn't want to. At the same time, there is the fact he lies to his friends constantly, a running theme for Leo's group, who are so close-knit and yet are too afraid of being judged to actually talk.

From an ace perspective, I strongly feel that Antaup has just grown up with the ace mindset that everyone pretends to have crushes. There's so much distance between him and the reality of sex, so it's purely a kind of game to him; a mental exercise.

And the way that he feels Jurand & Glaward being gay is "nothing to be proud of", yes, it's homophobic, Antaup is no ally, which again is part of that "best friends who aren't actually best friends" issue, and hints at misanthropy. But I also get a sense of allophobia, like why do these allos have to make life hard for themselves? Why does Leo care so much? Antaup knows about Jurand & Glaward but he doesn't cotton on to Leo's feelings, for him it should be easy for Leo to put aside the homophobia and focus on what's important. Romance getting in the way of pragmatic decisions doesn't make sense to him at all.

I wish there was more ace rep that was this curmudgeonly and exudes "too ace for this". Antaup has learned to fit in in a way that stops people asking questions, where he has control of the sex talk and can enjoy the game whilst not having to deal with the reality... At least until the reality deals with him. 😔

list 5 facts about a favorite sim of yours, and send this to 10 simblrs whose sims you adore 🖤

🌹🌹🌹🌹 diego lobo 🌹🌹🌹🌹

- collector of vintage perfumes & pulp erotica

- attends bimonthly erotic open mics to share the wealth & read aloud from said pulp erotica (he's a legend in the underground erotic open mic world)

- knows absolutely everyone's business, knows you know he knows your business but acts like he doesn't

- got his start/following as a critic by having a blog in college where he complained at-length about how ugly and wrong everyone was in his art classes

- has never done his taxes

plus i dunno i think liberals have a extremely poor perception of how much the president seems to effect the lives of americans like life hasnt gotten any better for me as a queer black muslim under biden and it didnt under trump and neither obama. so like. what gives? lol. but then again i live in a rural area of a red state so like i basically dont matter to them because they have the perception that actually ppl like me dont exist in these areas ans that everyone who lives here is a republican who should die

Reading isn’t enough I need to start beating white ppls asses

reading With the light after recently reading nana is weird, bc nana was kinda endless and had no developments for characters that needed it, and i keep thinking nothing good will happen (which is bad), and dreading it, but then that doesnt happen in With the light. a good thing happens instead, and then i feel bad for feeling concerned

ifans saying the dreamies should have stayed in the us bcs knctzens are too stalker-ish as if they weren’t just as bad

Staying home and grocery shopping instead of going to see my in-laws tomorrow for eight hours seems like a win for me ngl

you know my niece was at the house two days ago. im just realizing right now that this might be the first time i mentioned on tumblr im an aunt now. since mainly i post my mundane and momentary thoughts on here, not my significant life updates that i do a lot of reflecting on. sometimes ill make the book im reading sound like a significant life update but alas. yes i have a niece now and she's just over a month old. she was over on sunday along w all my other siblings. it's actually the first time ive gotten to HOLD her bc she was in the nicu for awhile after she was born, and then shortly after she came home everyone in my house took turns catching colds. the niece was over though. yeah.

and my brother (not the one whose baby it is) said "you know her hair almost looks reddish." and it honestly. HONESTLY. it never occurred to me, for as long as ive been aware that i had a niece bakin in the oven (and i found out in like... mid-january that my sister-in-law was pregnant). for the entire year of 2023 i never pictured the possibility that i could have a niece or nephew with red hair. SOUNDS STUPID BECAUSE I HAVE RED HAIR. i know. i have a big irish family but in my generation out of all of my cousins, kaily and i are the only redheads. my brothers dont have red hair, neither do their wives. my parents dont. you know how jkr and other writers like to write a trope of an entire family (of celtic ethnicity) is all redheads? thats actually incredibly uncommon. if anything that's why i like having red hair; it has distinction. that distinction very much still holds within my own family tree.

so i love baby, i love her so much, she's wonderful. she's beautiful. i love her so so much. and i love her beautiful parents too. however, if she does end up having red hair. it's just reddish tinted right now and she doesn't have a lot of hair overall. and you know how babies are, it can change. if this little girl grows up with red hair i'm suing for copyright infringement. im sorry but i did it first so that's not fair.