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#scheduling my days for success
delicatepoets · 11 months
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on undying friendships for @fightingdragonswithwho​ <3
graceland too - phoebe bridgers / daisy jones and the six / leonard cohen - boygenius / a league of their own (2022) / a little life - hanya yanagihara / ladybird (2017) / the seven husbands of evelyn hugo - taylor jenkins reid
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piningpercussionist · 2 months
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Oh! Fucking. Duh. Obvious Roxie post I can make today: here's an emote I made for the sp:te server! (With variants of different degrees of completion...)
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I was gonna go back and shade the comic colors Roxie but. Just ended up going w the colors picked off the screenshot. This screenshot, specifically!
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gideonisms · 1 year
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almost nothing is worth losing sleep over, I decided this after being 22. academic failure is better than losing a single night's sleep over something so silly. but at the same time, this proposal was due a, week and a half ago,
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roboticutie · 1 month
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My ferrets are seniors now and are slowly getting Old Ferret Diseases :(
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floralsapphics · 1 month
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#really struggling today#my vet suspects my cat has FIP and I’m crushed since that’s basically a death sentence and he only just turned 5 :(#I know GS-441524 is somewhat available in Canada now but since it’s not FDA approved it’s like 8k#what’s worse is my family and I have a 2 week vacation scheduled on May 11#so even though there’s this drug with a 90% success rate it’s just so incredibly expensive I doubt we could afford it#even if we did manage to get our hands on it we wouldn’t be able to administer it to him for those 2 weeks#and even though he’s doing somewhat ok at the moment who knows what his condition will be like during those 2 weeks :(#ultimately we’re trying to decide whether or not to put him down before our trip#like if he does have it and died alone and in pain while we were out of the country I would be crushed#but I’d also be crushed if we put him down when there’s the chance he doesn’t have it since FIP is so hard to diagnose#it’s the not knowing what’s going on that makes it worse#it’s so hard because he’s still so sweet and curious and has really been my rock since we got him I’m just absolutely beside myself#like the whole day yesterday he’s done nothing but cuddle me and my mom like he knows we’re upset but doesn’t know why#I just feel like I’m abandoning and failing him in his time of need#I desperately don’t want to go on this trip so I can spend more time with him and maybe scrounge up enough money to buy the drugs#and give him a fighting chance#but I can’t and I feel sick and trapped about it
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l-cereta · 2 months
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gnight all <3
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whumpy-wyrms · 5 months
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ITS BEEN A MONTH SINCE TLLR CHAPTER 11????? WHAT
#wyrms says stuff#SORRY ITS TAKING FOREVER TO WRITE HOLY SHIT???#i thought it had been like 2 weeks or something#dude i’m actually sorry it’s taking so long to get chapters out#BUT like the next three chapters are all around 2/3 of the way done#i miss those phases where writing becomes sooooo so so easy for me and i write like 3k words a day#i’ve never been able to like stick with a writing schedule#my energy for writing comes and goes as it pleases and it’s been like that all my life. drawing comes naturally#it never bothered me before that i’d just not write for a few months at a time and then suddenly get motivation#to write a shit ton of stuff at once in rapid succession#and it sucks because forcing myself to sit down and write is hard it just doesn’t come super naturally like drawing does.#like forcing myself to draw can be a lot of fun and it’s easy. but honestly i don’t chose when my brain tells me it’s writing time#but that’s probably not a good thing huh#and also i’m like?? SUPER SUPER excited about some of the chapters coming up?? like chapter 14 is THE chapter i’ve been most excited about#since i started this series. AND ITS BASICALLY ALREADY WRITTEN TOO#the parts in between are hard to figure out i’ve realized#and also hard to give myself motivation to write them. im basically just annoyed that writing doesn’t come as naturally as art does for me#and that ever since i started actually writing about my own ocs like 6 years ago#i’ve only been able to write in short bursts of a few months at a time#it’s annoying but it’s a good challenge for me to overcome. i just have to sit down and write and then i’ll get that motivation back#the next chapter should be done very very soon!!!
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fatcowboys · 5 months
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in a years (and some change) time since i i have become a signifigant stoner which really makes sense considering its up there with sumatriptan for relieving migraine pain tbh
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Fireflies Over The Wall - Chapter 3
Relationship: The Bell Keeper & Meiri (Original character)
Summary: "The troll brought with herself, every night without a fault, a baby.
Every night, she placed it upon the grass, and pointed upwards, showing her baby the stars and constellations. Showing her baby the fireflies.
Holding it tight. Cuddling with it. Making sure it saw the beauty the world had to offer. He had never considered himself a sentimental man. Yet this image, for some reason, never failed to make him return home feeling something gaping and void inside of himself.
Every one of his former coworkers must have returned to their families.
Who would Edmund return to when he could work no more?
What would give him a reason to get out of bed when the fireflies were no longer enough?"
An OC's origin story as well as a Bell Keeper character study, because this character is much more fascinating than I'd been giving him credit for.
Notes: Title from ‘Soap’ by The Oh Hello
Chapter title: Leech what's caustic
Read it on ao3
The second time it happened, the sun was up. Barely so, but it was, the golden rays hiding away the glimmer of the stars. It was early morning and while he’d only had twelve hours since the end of his last shift to rest, he actually felt good about heading to work that day. The fresh air of sunrise usually did that to him, even if he thought it was terribly corny. He had even started whistling before opening the door to the tower, when he heard the sound of a branch being forced to its full weight capacity and its leaves rustling with movement. As he turned around, expecting a large bird to have landed nearby or maybe some sort of squirrel, Edmund found he was actually not all that surprised to see Meiri dangling precariously from the tree.
“You again.” He said though his voice lacked (too much) bitterness. Even he couldn’t be an ass to a kid. Even if the kid didn’t partake in his code of conduct. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m looking at lichen.” Came her automatic answer. He couldn’t tell if that meant it was honest or a lie.
To her credit, she did seem to be looking at lichen. In the worst way possible, that was. Her legs were crossed over the branch she was hanging on to, both of her hands grasping it as the rest of her body was dragged down by gravity. Sure enough, there were light green patches on the part of the branch nearest to her face.
“I’m not even going to ask.” Edmund mumbled as he rubbed the bridge of his nose, even though the statement was irrelevant considering he had already asked.
And apparently, for some reason he was going to continue doing so. He walked closer, not feeling completely at ease with her suspended up in the air like that with only a branch which he wouldn’t be placing any trust on to hang on to. A fall from that height might not hurt someone his size, but it sure would her.
“Why is it you’re always climbing on something when I see you?”
Either his attempt to sound stern had been ignored or it completely went over her head. Both were equally likely, he thought. Meiri only shrugged, or did so as best as she could in her current position, causing her body to sway a bit. The branch creaked, making his breath hitch but seemingly having no effect on her.
“Not my fault interesting things are up high so often.”
He considered her answer as she seemingly went back to examining the lichen (and was it even healthy to look at them up this close?), not really seeing the fault in her logic. It sort of was why he kept his job, in the end. Maybe if he explained this to her he could beat the cop allegations.
“Oh, yeah?” Creeping even closer and telling himself that it was because even he wasn’t enough of a jerk to leave a child in a dangerous situation, Edmund hoped he looked unassuming as he took his hands out of his pockets and began calculating which would be the best position to keep them in order to catch her if needs be. “And what’s interesting about lichen?”
The kid let her head fall back in order to look at him, blinking in surprise. “They’re algae.” She said, even though she sounded unsure that she should be saying something. “And fungi as well. They’re in an obligatory mutualistic relationship; I mean, those two types of organisms exist by themselves in other situations, but the species that form lichens can’t survive by themselves.”
Edmund raised an eyebrow. “How exactly is that good for either of them?”
“Right? That confused me too. Needing someone else to survive in order to live seems like too much trouble. But they manage; you find lichen living in much more diverse places than just algae or just fungi. Even deserts! So they seem to be getting something out of it. Keeping each other alive.”
It was too damn early to be getting philosophical about plants’ twice removed cousins. Unfortunately, the kid didn’t look like she was planning on moving anytime soon.
“They need to reproduce by either the fungus part reproducing on its own and finding another algae or cyanobacteria, or a bit of the lichen gets torn apart and grows back somewhere else. There’s a lot more of them here than around the city centre, because of air quality, and I’m trying to get a look at the fruiting bodies on these ones.”
Edmund let his hands fall down, genuinely impressed to have heard her speak so much all at once. It was probably more words than she’d spoken during the entire time she’d been with him some nights before. He didn’t know what it was he was been waiting for, whether it was being told to sod off and leave her alone, to get annoyed enough to leave by himself, or for her to keep going on about lichen for some reason. But remaining there paid off when he heard a particularly loud snap, and automatically reached up to grab her in one swift motion.
“Oi!” She protested once she was in his arms. “What the heck?!”
The girl didn’t weigh much at all. The hardest work he was currently doing was controlling his breathing and heart rate after his reflexes had taken charge and thankfully spared the child from a two metre high fall.
Or at least he thought they had, but the branch was still holding strong.
Which probably explained the indignant fire to Meiri’s eyes and the way she seemed to be fighting against his arms to be let go off.
“Stop yer squirming, the whole branch was gonna go down!”
“Oh, really?” She asked with no small amount of sarcasm as she pointedly looked from him to the perfectly still branch.
Edmund already had a counter argument on his tongue when, like an actor who had missed his cue, the middle of that very branch cracked and the half to which she’d been clinging to fell loudly on the floor in front of them, making them both startle.
“Oh!” Meiri stopped her fighting, looking down at what could very well have been her causa mortis had it not been for Edmund’s quick thinking. “Really.”
“Yes, kid, really!” He put her down on the floor, noticing how she immediately went to touch the branch. “How on earth come ya haven’t gotten yourself killed yet?!”
The girl only shrugged and began touching the branch seemingly at random. Edmund sighed, his shoulders dropping in exhaustion - more so emotionally after the scare than physically - as he failed to will himself to walk away now that there was no immediate danger to that child anymore.
“You gonna take this one home as well?” He asked for lack of a better thing to say.
“No. I saw what I wanted to already.” She then turned to him and raised her hands. “Plus my hands are probably full of spores now! If I touch the right places I might create new lichen.”
Okay, you are weird, he thought but refused to say out loud. There were certain things you never told children, no matter how profoundly you believed in them. He had been a weird kid; he would know.
“Well, good luck with that, then.” One foot in front of the other. Yes, Edmund, good job. He began walking away, telling himself it was Saturday afternoon so she was probably on her allowed ‘wandering around town’ time, and right after that reminding himself that whether or not it was the case was very much not his problem. He had a long day of looking at grass to get to.
He wasn’t allowed to.
“Hey!” She called after him when he was already walking away, and he groaned. Turning back to look at her, he put on his most stern look with his arms crossed, trying to convey an obvious ‘I don’t have time for this’ energy. He came to regret it, though, when he saw that she actually looked the most apologetic he’d ever seen her. She was twisting her hands on one another and biting her lip, looking to the side rather than at him.
“Thank you for not letting me fall.”
The sentence sounded like it took a lot of effort to make it come out of her mouth, but she still made sure each word was clearly pronounced, and seemed to take his small nod as enough of an answer.
“AndcouldIborrowthatbookyouhave?”
That question was much more hurried, like she was afraid that it would either hurt to get it out or that she would be punished for asking it. Neither of which were very good signs, so Edmund blinked as he stared at her, his silence lasting longer simply because he was caught off guard by it.
“I don’t know which one you’re talking about, but sure. I haven’t gotten rid of any books recently, so it must still be here.”
When she brought her eyes back to look at his, there was no small amount of surprise on them. He didn’t quite get it; it sure was surprising that she’d come all the way here to ask (or all the way here to look at lichen and then took the opportunity to ask, whatever), but he couldn’t see why it was unexpected for him to agree. Even if it were only to get rid of her, what harm could it do to let her have a book he probably hadn’t opened in years?
Checking his watch to see if he still had time to spare (he didn’t, but what was going to happen during daylight hours? Reverse troll attack?), he walked back past her and to his cabin, keeping the door open in a gesture to allow her inside. She stepped in and walked purposefully to his bookshelf, easily selecting the volume she wanted: a relatively thin one on identification of the local arboreal flora.
“Thanks.” She said while looking down at it. “What would you like me to do when I’m done reading it?”
He didn’t really care.
“Well, where do you plan on reading it?”
Meiri looked at him and shrugged, scanning the area as if to look for a good shade to read under.
He took a deep breath, fighting back the unexpected idea of asking her if she wanted to read while he stayed in his post on top of the wall. But he didn’t need something to annoy him or distract him from the absolute Nothing he was supposed to monitor.
“Eh, you know where I live. Just leave it in front of the door inside a plastic bag or something in case it rains.”
That seemed to be enough, and she ducked her head in acknowledgement before walking away. His exhale was almost an amused snort as he turned around to do the same.
…......
She delivered the book back into his hands herself, in the end.
He had been off duty in his house, sitting on his couch and listening to the radio as he read the newspaper. It was now one day old, true, but surely that was an acceptable lag. He raised his eyes to the door after hearing two curt knocks, not having the chance to neither ask who it was nor tell them to come in before the door was slightly opened.
He saw nothing.
And then he lowered his gaze a whole bunch and saw Meiri looking at him.
“Oh, look at the time!” He gasped with mock brightness as he looked at the spot in his wrist where he usually wore his watch, currently bare. “It’s ‘little girls shouldn’t be out by themselves’ hours!”
Whereas she’d poked her head inside the house looking uncertain at first, Meiri began glaring at him immediately after that. He was getting used to that, truth be told. Wordlessly, she stepped inside with the book in her arms and closed the door behind herself, keeping her frown firmly in place as she walked towards him and handed him a piece of paper she’d been keeping inside of her hoodie’s pocket. Edmund only broke eye contact after taking it from her in order to read it. The paper seemed to have been ripped from a notebook and had a few sentences in cursive calligraphy.
“Dear sir,
We were informed that Meiri had a book that belongs to you and that she wanted to return it as soon as possible. As such, we made an exception and allowed her to go out after dinner tonight, seeing as she will be at school tomorrow morning. We trust that she will be safe in your presence, but feel no obligation to keep watch over her for any longer than necessary; she knows her way back.
In case there’s any need for it, have my personal phone number and also St. Anne’s.
XXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXX
Terry Hansen”
The signature was a sweeping scrawl Edmund was fairly sure no child could feign. Plus, now he had a means to contact her zookeepers, so that was a bonus.
What was not a bonus is that said zookeepers seemed to have as many brain cells as wild animals themselves. ‘We trust that she will be safe in your presence’, what bullshit was that? He had seen him exactly once, absolutely nothing guaranteed these imbeciles that Edmund wasn’t some sort of creep.
Unless they were trusting him on the grounds of him being a Patrol officer, in which case they were even bigger imbeciles.
“Fair enough.” He said, not mentioning any of that to the girl since none of it was her fault or under her control. “There’s no method to my shelf’s organisation, so feel free to leave it wherever.”
“I noticed.” He heard her grumble under her breath as she kneeled on top of the wooden chest directly underneath his shelves in order to reach them more easily.
“Yeah, and my best friend’s a librarian, can you believe it? Almost has a stroke any time she comes here.”
She blinked at him, surprised he had paid her any mind, and just… stood there awkwardly near the door, taking in the space even though she’d been there before, clearly uncertain of what to do. Deciding to take mercy on her, Edmund gestured to the empty spots on the couch and the chairs on the table. As she walked over to sit on the opposite edge of the sofa, he decided to see if he could break her silence.
“What did you think of it?”
“It was good.” She removed her white (well, grey) sneakers and turned to sit facing him, her legs crossed. “I took so long with it because I was writing down some notes about it in my notebook.”
He hummed, deciding not to comment on how her definition of ‘so long’ was four days.
“And are you already reading anything new?”
Meiri nodded, her voluminous hair bouncing slightly with it. “I was going to come earlier, but I began reading a book in the library and lost track of time.”
He was going to be a responsible adult. He was going to be a responsible and mature adult and he would not take advantage of the fact that she apparently frequented the library to teach her to mess with Kaisa.
He hated being an adult.
“Cool.” He put his newspaper down and got up from the couch, stretching his arms above his head after doing so. Her gaze followed him. “I’m gonna make tea. You want some?”
“Lemongrass?”
“You got it.”
This time he had actual lemongrass to brew in the kettle, so hopefully it would turn out better, even if she seemed to have enjoyed the first one. So maybe he should be hoping she’d like this one. You really never knew with kids.
“So-” He began as he took the leaves from their jar. “What’s yer book about?”
“Flower language.”
Edmund hummed. “And?”
“And?”
He turned his head back to look at her, finding her looking at him like he was displaying some sort of enigmatic behaviour she couldn’t crack. “What have you learned already? If ya don’t mind sharing.”
Edmund went back to pouring water inside the kettle, but not before seeing her blink in surprise. “You want me to tell you about it?”
“Well, if I didn’t I wouldn’t’ve asked, would I?”
“Why?”
Great question! He hated it.
“Flowers are cool.” And I wish I could have talked to people about what I liked when I was your age. “And I want some background noise; yer voice isn’t quite as annoying as I first thought.”
He turned the stovetop on and put the kettle atop of it, being showed her tongue as soon as he turned to her again. Edmund wasn’t an ass, at least he didn’t like to think of himself as one. But he had to admit that messing with this kid was pretty fun, especially since she was completely capable of giving as good as she got. Despite her indignation, true or otherwise, she began sharing what she’d learned so far when he sat back down. Reluctantly at first, but the more she realised he was actually listening the more she picked up in pace and energy.
“I don’t get why there are flowers that mean something as specific as ‘asking for forgiveness’” She said when they were both drinking their teas already; if she’d noticed any difference in taste from the previous one, she didn’t mention it. “Isn’t it much easier to actually go to someone and say sorry?”
Edmund rubbed the stubble on his chin. “I mean… kinda? It’s easier in the way that you don’t have to go looking for a flower and then give it to the person, but saying sorry can be hard sometimes, you know?”
That seemed to actually give her pause and make her think. “I’m not sure I do. Maybe it’s hard when you mean it. When you’re actually sorry. But usually when I apologise it’s just because someone is making me.”
He was not about to open that particular box right then and there, but he stored the information away for a later date. And then he got confused as to why he expected to ever see this girl again, anyway.
“That’s true. The more you regret something, the harder it is to face it. I think either flowers or a ‘sorry’ are fine. If someone wrongs you, it’s enough to have them acknowledge it in most cases.”
She tilted her head to the side. “In most cases?”
“Yeah. In some you do have to walk away from that person or relationship. But you shouldn’t worry about that, kid. It’ll come to you at the right time.”
Her head bobbed up and down as she nodded mindlessly, her gaze unfocused as she concentrated on whatever thought process she was going through rather than the world around her.
She actually looked a lot more calm than he’d ever seen her.
They finished their teas in companionable silence, having run out of flowers to talk about. Before leaving, she ducked her head in what he interpreted as a sign of respect.
He was probably just being delusional.
“Thank you for having me.” She said, clearly quoting a script but sounding genuine all the same.
“No worries. Can you do me a favour, kid?”
Rather than answering, she only looked at him, letting him know he had her attention.
“Ask Mr. Hansen to call me when you get home safely.”
He slipped a piece of paper with his number into her hand, and she nodded. The girl then went off into the night, and Edmund only closed the door when he could see her no longer.
…......
“No.”
“No?”
“Ya heard me.”
“Oh, come on! What would it even cost you?”
The grumpy witch crossed her arms and sat back against the back of her chair, upset that all of her neat and carefully presented arguments hadn’t had an effect on the man in front of her. Truly an ‘unstoppable force meets immovable object” kind of situation, but he was determined to be more resilient than she was insistent.
No small challenge, that was.
“Me? It’d cost me nothing.” She raised her hands above her head in clear frustration. “But it would cost you a lot. You can’t keep avoiding this, Kaisa. You need to talk to her.”
Kaisa slid down the back of her chair, groaning. “But I don’t want to!”
An eyebrow raised, Edmund twirled his cup so as to mix what’s inside - even though it was only pure black coffee - while he looked at the image in front of him. Had he known less about Kaisa’s life, he would have helped her in an instant. Asking an old lady to deliver a book to the library, how hard could it be? But he knew what she was really avoiding and couldn’t in good conscience enable that road she was going down.
“You don’t? I hadn’t noticed.”
“Do you want me to be thrown into the void?”
He was about to answer that yes, in fact, he’d have a blast if it came to that, when the cafe was suddenly filled with noise as a group of children swarmed in. They all wore the Edmund Ahlberg Elementary’s uniform and backpacks with multiple shapes, laughing, screaming, speaking over each other.
Kaisa had the exact reaction Edmund would have expected: cringing and clearly fighting (losing) the internal battle to resist the librarian urge to tell those kids to quiet down.
Edmund too groaned, looking behind himself as he had been facing opposite the cafe’s door to see what the fuss was all about. In a matter of moments they were both shooting the mass of kids their best Disapproving Adult Glares, which worked as well as one would expect (it didn’t work at all).
But they tried, they tried because they remembered having some respect (or fear) for adults when they were that age, so maybe the clout would come at some point and the kids would realise that they could still act like children, but keep it down just a notch.
They didn’t, but that attempt kept them looking and paying attention to the kids. It was clearly some sort of impromptu birthday party, since all of them were gathered around one child in specific, a boy with perfect golden hair, and trying to bargain a whole cake out of an unamused cashier.
“Popular kid.” Kaisa huffed with her arms crossed. “Can you even imagine talking to that many people in school?”
But Edmund was far more invested in the children’s conversation then Kaisa now, because one of the kids nearest to him - not close enough to the birthday boy to be their friends, nor disinterested looking enough to be loser kids, so likely bootlickers - began very loudly whispering for all in the vicinity to hear.
“Why did Meiri come along?” He asked the girl beside him. “Brannon doesn’t even like her.”
Whether that was his end goal or not, most kids in his periphery began giggling, mean comments of the sort spreading themselves throughout the mass of kids. Edmund frowned, scanning the group for a familiar pair of dark eyes.
And found them in the back, still near the entrance, clearly listening to everything that was being said and looking around at her peers like a caged animal that had nowhere to run to. And then she met his gaze.
Edmund only thought about what he was going to do for a split second. It wasn’t his problem, shouldn’t be of his interest, but the popular looking birthday boy began snickering along to the mean spirited comments and enough was enough.
“Meiri, there you are!” He said, cheerful like he usually only was when pretending and only loud enough to make it seem like it only interested him to be heard by the girl herself. He thought his acting was good enough. “We were waiting for you, come sit!”
All eyes turned to her, and even though she looked like she was clearly aware she hadn’t been left a choice, she hurried past her classmates to go to their table in the back, pretending to the best of her abilities that that was her plan all along.
“Child. At our table.” Kaisa said, very unhelpfully and even less coherently when Meiri was close enough to be standing practically by Edmund’s side. “Why is there a child at our table?”
“Because she walked here with her little child legs.” He answered, determined to be even more unhelpful.
Ignoring the argument, or the lack of one in front of her, Meiri glared at Edmund. “You didn’t have to do that.”
She sounded half like she was complaining, but oddly enough the other half seemed like she was acknowledging she’d been offered an easy way out of an awful situation. And Ed did keep in mind that she’d just been through a stressful couple of moments. It would be just normal for her to be a bit snappy.
“Of course not. But Kaisa and I were going to let a bunch of food go to waste as per usual, so you might as well sit down and help us out with that.”
Her eyes went first to the brunch spread, not really impressed at the amount of food but surprised that only two people seemed to have decided to share it. And then, her gaze went to Kaisa. The change was noticeable; her eyebrows rose and her lips parted slightly, clearly having decided in her young mind that the witch was the epitome of cool. Or, considering she was a regular library patron, she’d probably made that decision a long time ago and now was just amazed to be so close to her idol.
Edmund was not jealous.
“Meiri, this is Kaisa. She’s the friend I told you about. Kaisa, Meiri. She’s a nice little girl, that’s all you need to know.”
He wasn’t sure either of them had heard him. Slowly, without taking her eyes away from the librarian, Meiri pulled back the chair on Edmund’s side and sat down. Kaisa was also staring back at the child, and it was hilarious to see that he couldn’t tell who was more intimidated by who.
“I visit him sometimes.” Meiri added, as if finding the information he had provided to be unsatisfactory, and despite the fact that she had only visited him three times before.
Three times. That was actually a lot. How had that happened?
“You know, Ed.” Kaisa whispered, still looking at the now sitting child like she was seeing a ghost. Scratch that, she probably knew how to act more natural around ghosts. “When I told you to get yourself a child, I did mean legally.”
He groaned, rolling his eyes as he grabbed the cup that had been in front of Meiri’s seat to pour some of the berries tea that had come with their combo for her.
“I didn’t get myself a child.” He said, interrupting his explanation to put the steaming cup back in front of her with a ‘here, kid, this one is red berries flavoured. See if you like it and serve yourself to whatever, we’ve got plenty’. “She’s just a random girl who likes to play near my house. Nothing to it.”
Kaisa was staring at him like he’d gone insane.
“What the fuck?”
He immediately gasped, glaring at his friend just before turning to the girl who had been blowing on her tea, making her raise her brows.
“Don’t repeat that word until you are a teenager!”
“Ed, are you shitting me?”
“Or that!”
“Your name is Edward?”
Intentionally or not, she sure avoided the conversation escalating into an argument between the two adults. He opened and closed his mouth wordlessly, amazed that they’d gotten that far without her knowing his name. He cleared his throat.
“Edmund, actually.”
“Wow, your kid doesn’t even know your name?”
“You mean like the name of my school?” She tilted her head to the side. “I’m so sorry.”
She didn’t even need to elaborate. Her face clearly conveyed her impression regarding the figure of Edmund Ahlberg. Edmund was about to say he didn’t mind it, when Meiri sighed and spoke up again.
“It’d be so much more fair if people got to pick their own names.”
And then, of course, Kaisa could not resist the sweet allure of being a little shit.
“But that’s the worst part.” She giggled, and when Edmund’s glare only conveyed an ‘I’ll kill you’ anger rather than a ‘please don’t tell her’ fear, she continued. “He picked. He did that to himself, can you believe it?”
He threw his hands up in the air, having been over this countless times with Kaisa.
“It’s supposed to be ironic and funny!”
“It is funny! It’s a hilarious joke, but it’s at your expense!”
“Oh, fuck you.” His eyes became the size of their saucers as soon as he said that, immediately whipping his head to the side (and tilting it downwards) to reinforce what he’d just said about that word. To his surprise, what he saw wasn’t something he’d ever witnessed before.
Meiri was holding back laughter.
And because of that, he let Kaisa off the hook.
“Whatever. Meiri, what do you like?”
She blinked her big dark eyes at him. “Hm?”
“What do you like to eat for brunch? We have basically anything you can imagine.”
“Well…” It was clear the question confused her, but she scrambled to find an answer, not wanting to disappoint them and not really understanding why she was being offered any of it. “I’ve never had brunch before, so I don’t know. I like dates?”
“Okay, store your imagination away for a bit. We don’t have that, kid.”
“But you said-”
“I know, I know, it was a big overstatement. Now, do you like pancakes?”
The plate with pancakes was usually left untouched or missing one pancake that Kaisa may or may not pick depending on her mood. Considering it was a very child friendly food, Edmund picked it up from near his friend, who was watching the scene in front of her with great amusement, and put it in front of the little girl. She informed them she’d never eaten pancakes (to which they’d both sent her looks of horror), since the orphanage’s head cook, who essentially chose their meals, was an immigrant from a country where they didn’t really eat them. She said their breakfast was usually fruit with a cheese and ham sandwich, so Edmund grabbed her some slices of banana and strawberry that he was reasonably sure Kaisa wasn’t going to eat - and if she was planning to, she didn’t complain - and put them on top of the pancakes, hoping the added fruit would make the flavours more familiar to her.
And also make it so he wasn’t feeding this child who he was in no way in charge of a complete sugar bomb. Come to think of it, St. Anne’s cook had a good point. Who the hell had decided fried cake was an acceptable breakfast food?
They talked some more, and Kaisa eventually stopped looking at the girl like she was an alien, even if the girl didn’t stop looking at her like she was a famous rockstar quite just yet. The group of kids had decided the place was too expensive if they wanted to buy an entire cake with their own allowances, and left soon after having arrived; after that happened, and Edmund asked what in the world they had all been doing at school on a Saturday, Meiri disclosed that they were all part of a special science program for people who either enjoyed it or had an affinity.
Which sounded cool as hell, but Meiri didn’t speak of it with much fondness.
“Your tea’s better.” She told him after the waiter had left with the money they’d given him to get their change.
“Of course it is.” He scoffed, feeling playful before noticing with no small amount of surprise that that girl had actually complimented him. Or, well, something he did, but it was all the same in the end.
Together, him and Kaisa left a very good tip to their waiter, and the three of them got up at the same time. Edmund and Meiri led the way, with Kaisa choosing to follow them closely so she could entertain herself with the pair.
“It was good to see you eating, for once. Must spend a lot of energy with how much you climb around.”
“It was good to see you eating food for once.”
“The hell is that supposed to mean?” They were already outside at that point, so Ed was able to raise his voice just slightly.
“Sandwiches aren’t dinner.” Meiri stated, holding to her chest a textbook she’d taken out of her bag at some point to show them. “It’s what you ate when I met you, and I saw your toaster plugged on last time I visited you. That’s not a meal.”
“It’s a perfectly reasonable meal!”
“It is not.”
“Don’t ya know that grains are the base of the food pyramid?”
“Whole grains. The bread you use is whiter than you are.”
He gaped at her in stunned and indignant silence for a moment. “And I suppose you know everything about that, do you?”
“Not really. But I must know more than you since I don’t eat sandwiches every night.”
“You don’t know that I eat them every night!”
She shot him a very level knowing look.
“Well, fine. What would you have me eat, then, if you’re so wise in the ways of nutrition?”
Meiri went back to facing forward, shrugging. “Tia Teresa usually cooks us rice and beans with some type of meat. And salad.”
Oh. Actual actual food.
“Well, I’ll be a son of a woff. How mad will this woman be at me for having fed you pancakes?”
“Not much, probably. She thinks you’re kind to me.”
“Wait, she knows about me?” He stopped walking in order to ask her about it properly, but this only made Meiri duck her head and walk faster, so he actually ended up having to pick up his pace. She was surprisingly quick for someone with such short legs. “You told her about me?”
“Shut up!”
“No, I won’t! Aw, kid, you do care!”
He kept on lightly teasing her for it as she vehemently denied ever having mentioned his name, in the aggressive ways of an awful liar who thinks they can convince other people simply by reinforcing what’s being said. Kaisa watched this from behind, letting them get more and more distant since she was actually headed to the opposite side. They were still arguing (or maybe they were just talking, she wasn’t at all sure) when she lost sighmeirit of the pair, and she chuckled as she turned on her heels to go back home. She might not have gotten what she’d wanted to out of Edmund, but she sure had found something much more interesting that day.
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inga-don-studio · 7 months
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Technically I’ll resume being actually active on here again either tonight or tomorrow once I’m done w/work (depending on how much of a drama queen my phone wants to be as it progresses faster & faster toward it’s imminent demise), but I’ll call this the end of my little hiatus. Catch up with you guys soon! 🧡
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bongosblorbos · 9 months
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oh now im up late crying because of lost potential and whatnot
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manyblinkinglights · 2 years
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hi, i live in a ditch under a rock in california. what's happening above ground? can you give me a hint, please?
You don’t have any WATER! You POOR FOOLS! Alfalfa in the desert as a profitable export crop and the Colorado River water rights up for re-smackdown-brawl-negotiation in a handful of years… my god… the very STATE of California rn
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kajmasterclass · 7 days
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youtube
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boleynqueenes · 2 months
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rereading NT like ‘this is so good… who wrote this? 👀’
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theambitiouswoman · 6 months
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How To Become A Brand New Person ✨✨
Self Reflect:
Journal daily.
Think about past decisions and how they impacted your life.
Meditate regularly.
Create a vision board to visualize your goals.
Review your strengths and weaknesses.
Identify your core values and beliefs.
Figure out your passions and interests.
Think about your childhood dreams and aspirations.
Evaluate your current state of happiness and fulfillment.
Set Clear Goals:
Define specific career goals, like "Get promoted within two years."
Set health goals, like "Lose 20 pounds in six months."
Create financial goals such as "Save $10,000 for a vacation."
Establish personal development goals, like "Read 24 books in a year."
Set relationship goals, such as "Improve communication with my partner."
Define education goals, like "Complete a master's degree in three years."
Set travel goals, like "Visit five new countries in the next two years."
Create hobbies and interests goals, such as "Learn to play a musical instrument."
Set community or volunteer goals, like "Volunteer 100 hours this year."
Establish mindfulness or self-care goals, such as "Practice meditation daily."
Self Care:
Exercise for at least 30 minutes a day.
Follow a balanced diet with plenty of fruits and vegetables.
Prioritize getting 7-9 hours of quality sleep each night.
Practice in relaxation techniques like deep breathing or yoga.
Take regular breaks at work to avoid burnout.
Schedule "me time" for activities you enjoy.
Limit exposure to stressors and toxic people.
Practice regular skincare and grooming routines.
Seek regular medical check-ups and screenings.
Stay hydrated by drinking enough water daily.
Personal Development:
Read a book every month from various genres.
Attend workshops or seminars on topics of interest.
Learn a new language or musical instrument.
Take online courses to acquire new skills.
Set aside time for daily reflection and self improvement.
Seek a mentor in your field for guidance.
Attend conferences and networking events.
Start a side project or hobby to expand your abilities.
Practice public speaking or communication skills.
Do creative activities like painting, writing, or photography.
Create a Support System:
Build a close knit group of friends who uplift and inspire you.
Join clubs or organizations aligned with your interests.
Connect with a mentor or life coach.
Attend family gatherings to maintain bonds.
Be open and honest in your communication with loved ones.
Seek advice from trusted colleagues or supervisors.
Attend support groups for specific challenges (e.g., addiction recovery).
Cultivate online connections through social media.
Find a therapist or counselor for emotional support.
Participate in community or volunteer activities to meet like minded people.
Change Habits:
Cut back on sugary or processed foods.
Reduce screen time and increase physical activity.
Practice gratitude by keeping a daily journal.
Manage stress through mindfulness meditation.
Limit procrastination by setting specific deadlines.
Reduce negative self-talk by practicing self-compassion.
Establish a regular exercise routine.
Create a budget and stick to it.
Develop a morning and evening routine for consistency.
Overcome Fear and Self Doubt:
Face a specific fear head-on (example: public speaking).
Challenge your negative thoughts with positive affirmations.
Seek therapy to address underlying fears or traumas.
Take small, calculated risks to build confidence.
Visualize success in challenging situations.
Surround yourself with supportive and encouraging people.
Journal about your fears and doubts to gain clarity.
Celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how small.
Focus on your strengths and accomplishments.
Embrace failure as a valuable learning experience.
Embrace Change:
Relocate to a new city or country.
Switch careers or industries to pursue your passion.
Take on leadership roles in your workplace.
Volunteer for projects outside your comfort zone.
Embrace new technologies and digital tools.
Travel to unfamiliar destinations.
Start a new hobby or creative endeavor.
Change your daily routine to add variety.
Adjust your mindset to see change as an opportunity.
Seek out diverse perspectives and viewpoints.
Practice Gratitude:
Write down three things you're grateful for each day.
Express gratitude to loved ones regularly.
Create a gratitude jar and add notes of appreciation.
Reflect on the positive aspects of challenging situations.
Show gratitude by volunteering or helping others in need.
Send thank-you notes or messages to people who've helped you.
Keep a gratitude journal and review it regularly.
Share your gratitude openly during family meals or gatherings.
Focus on the present moment and appreciate the little things.
Practice gratitude even in times of adversity.
Be Patient:
Set realistic expectations for your progress.
Accept that personal growth takes time.
Focus on the journey rather than the destination.
Learn from setbacks and view them as opportunities to improve.
Celebrate small milestones along the way.
Practice self-compassion during challenging times.
Stay committed to your goals, even when progress is slow.
Keep a journal to track your personal growth.
Recognize that patience is a valuable skill in personal transformation.
Celebrate Small Wins:
Treat yourself to your favorite meal or dessert.
Reward yourself with a spa day or self-care activity.
Share your achievements with friends and loved ones.
Create a vision board to visualize your successes.
Acknowledge and congratulate yourself in a journal.
Give yourself permission to take a break and relax.
Display reminders of your accomplishments in your workspace.
Take a day off to celebrate a major milestone.
Host a small gathering to mark your achievements.
Set aside time to reflect on how far you've come.
Maintain Balance:
Set clear boundaries in your personal and work life.
Prioritize self care activities in your daily routine.
Schedule regular breaks and downtime.
Learn to say "no" when necessary to avoid overcommitment.
Evaluate your work life balance regularly.
Seek support from friends and family to avoid burnout.
Be kind to yourself and accept imperfections.
Practice mindfulness to stay present and grounded.
Revisit your priorities and adjust them as needed.
Embrace self love and self acceptance as part of your daily life.
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trashycosmos · 1 year
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Hu5h
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