her pronouns are HE/HIM

So, my spouse has been exploring his gender lately; he also just built himself a new laptop. Today he told me that he in an attempt to process some genderfeels through metaphor, he made a post on a trans forum along the lines of: "I'm a lifelong Windows user and I think I'm pretty good at it. I want to find out what Linux has to offer but I'm afraid I wouldn't be any good at it. And how do you choose the right Linux distro, anyway? Do you have to try them all?"

The responses, he said, were a mix of useful advice about feeling out your gender and useful advice about choosing a Linux distro.

I love trans people so much

Edit 4/8, in case you don't see the reblogged additions -- my wife is now going by Eve!

"Sad Cat Poem" by Spencer Madsen

[ID: Tweets from Emily 'Soup Lesbian' Gwen (@theemilygwen) on twitter with the following text:

Well, just left a job interview crying because the hiring manager told me they liked my application but were disappointed that I didn't bother dressing appropriately. I tried to explain that I haven't been able to afford new clothes in years but I just couldn't handle it.

That comment and my reaction was one of the most mortifying moments of my life. I thought I put together a decent outfit for the job with what I had, and hearing her say that just destroyed me.

Anyway I'm still looking for work and struggling a lot. Even $5 would help pay for a meal. ko-fi.com/emilygwen

End ID]

Please help Emily Gwen, the creator of the lesbian flag. If you show me that you donated any amount I will draw you something. You can also support them by buying something from their Threadless store!

Happy Thistle Debut Day!

Someone asked me to expand a little on a topic that was buried down in a big chain of reblogs, so I'm doing that here--it's about the use of the archaic "thee", "thou", "thy", etc. in LOTR and what it tells you about characters’ feelings for one another. (I am NOT an expert on this, so it's just what I've picked up over time!)

Like many (most?) modern English speakers, I grew up thinking of those old forms of 2nd person address as being extra formal. I think that's because my main exposure to them was in the Bible ("thou shall not...") and why wouldn't god, speaking as the ultimate authority, be using the most formal, official voice? But it turns out that for a huge chunk of the history of the English language, "thee," "thou," and "thy" were actually the informal/casual alternatives to the formal "you", “your”, “yours”. Like tú v. usted in Spanish!

With that in mind, Tolkien was very intentional about when he peppered in a "thee" or a "thou" in his dialogue. It only happens a handful of times. Most of those are when a jerk is trying to make clear that someone else is beneath them by treating them informally. Denethor "thou"s Gandalf when he’s pissed at him. The Witch King calls Éowyn "thee" to cut her down verbally before he cuts her down physically. And the Mouth of Sauron calls Aragorn and Gandalf "thou" as a way to show them that he has the upper hand. (Big oops by all 3 of these guys!)

The other times are the opposite--it's when someone starts to use the informal/casual form as a way to show their feeling of affection for someone else. Galadriel goes with the formal "you" all through the company's days in Lórien, but by the time they leave she has really taken them to heart. So when she sends them a message via Gandalf early in the Two Towers, she uses "thee" and "thou" in her words to Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli because now they're valued friends and allies. And--this is the big one, folks, that was already alluded to in my previous post--Éowyn starts aggressively "thou"ing Aragorn when she is begging him to take her along as he prepares to ride out of Dunharrow. She is very intentionally trying to communicate her feelings to him in her choice of pronoun--an "I wouldn't be calling you "thee" if I didn't love you" kind of thing. And he is just as intentionally using "you" in every single one of his responses in order to gently establish a boundary with her without having to state outright that he doesn't reciprocate her feelings. It's not until much later when her engagement to Faramir is announced that Aragorn finally busts out "I have wished thee joy ever since I first saw thee". Because now it is safe to acknowledge a relationship of closeness and familiarity with her without the risk that it will be misinterpreted. He absolutely wants to have that close, familiar relationship, but he saved it for when he knew she could accept it on his terms without getting hurt.

So, you know, like all things language-based...Tolkien made very purposeful decisions in his word choices down to a bonkers level of detail. I didn’t know about this pronoun thing until I was a whole ass adult, but that’s the joy of dealing with Tolkien. I still discover new things like this almost every time I re-read.

(guy who sent in the original i thought you were a lesbian ask) i just wanted to say i still find you just as attractive with the knowledge that you are a man, apologies if i made you feel uncomfortable or like you're less handsome for not being a hot butch. you're still plenty hot regardless and i'm sorry for inflicting tony hawk's sapphic nightmare on you

Tony Hawk’s Sapphic Nightmare is very funny, I would photoshop something if I could right now. Thank you.

Mine: Refer to me however you want!

Mike: Yeah, for me too. I think I use all pronouns too.

[They high-five and fist-bump each other]

Mine:

[via @barbmine]

Jellyfish, specifically JellyNeil has no concept of gender nor does it remotely care about its gender until a very specific series of events

Find the mer au masterpost here 💕

Embroidered patches coming soon 🌈🔫

now that f1nn5ter has come out as genderfluid I think a lot of y'all owe him an apology. even when the narrative was that he was cis, he was still incredibly kind to the trans community. and yet so many people were so quick to say shit like "oh he's just cosplaying" or "he's co-opting transfem culture".

experimenting with gender presentation is how a lot of people find out they're trans. regardless of how a public figure presents themself to you on your computer screen, they're still entitled to a private relationship with their own sexuality and gender identity. give them space to work things out on their own terms rather than imposing assumptions on them one way or the other.

ive exclusively been playing it by ear with the makeup (no tutorials or anything) and i somehow always end up looking like a secretary kind of so ive been practicing looking exasperated while wearing makeup cuz i figure i gotta work with what im given ya know

after seeing an old family friend today, ma said to me real quiet "im sorry she didn't use the right pronouns for you" & then asked how I felt

the best part of rvb is when they refer to tex by he/him pronouns for like 2 episodes and church just rolls with it

this is how people talk about pokemon

I'm the only guy who uses masculine pronouns who gets really pissed off when he reads a fanfic and it says GENDER NEUTRAL, so when you read it you simply find what

"Girlfriend" "My girl" "My woman" "Mama"

Like, bitch doesn't matter if you're using a neutral pronoun, the moment you use a feminine pronoun stop being a gender-neutral reader

But I think this only gets worse in smut fanfics

The person goes there and puts GENDER NEUTRAL AFAB READER

So if you're a person with afab who isn't cis, wow, a fanfic with my genitals but neutral pronouns so I don't have dysphoria or feel uncomfortable!

And guess what? Again you will find it there

"good girl" "my girl" "my woman" "my girlfriend" and blah blah

Look man, let's be honest, do you want to write solely for female and Afab readers? Okay, it's your right! You can do this completely at will and with a clear conscience

But for god's sake! DON'T PUT ON THAT YOU'RE A FUCKING GENDER NEUTRAL READER IF YOU'RE GOING TO EVENTUALLY USE FEMALE PRONOUNS

THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS, IF YOU WANT TO USE FEMALE PRONOUNS JUST SAY IT'S A FUCKING FEM READER, IT WILL SAVE US READERS WITH MALE OR NEUTRAL PRONOUNS FROM READING THIS

That's it, my outburst of personal hatred and at the same time an extra determination to write more male reader

Because besides having a lot of fem content, it seems that the creators who try to make it gender neutral are too stupid to understand how gender and neutral pronouns work

Just say it's a FEM reader, you're not gonna die if you do this asshole