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axelsagewrites · 9 months

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Roy Kent*Locker Room

Pairing: Season one!Roy Kent x f!reader

Word count: 2063

Warnings: swearing (kent style), m! receiving oral, voyeurism/exhibitionism, Jamie flirting with reader, Roy’s inner thoughts aka light violence, smut 18+

Masterlist here

Jamie fucking Tartt was about to get his front teeth knocked out his fucking skull if he didn’t back the fuck down was all Roy could think about during practise. that and knocking him over the head with a heavy rope, or a rock, or his fist, or his shoe, or really anything. of course, the American didn’t see the harm in Jamie running up and down the pitch like a twat but as captain Roy wanted nothing more than to ship all three of them back on a plane to wherever the hell the cowboy came from.

the only solace Roy got during that practise was your text saying you would pick him up after practise for a surprise date. for a moment it actually brought a smile to his face. that was till he caught sight of Tartt doing his own chant, so he sent back a quick ‘love u’ text before going to yell at the knob head celebrating a fake match.

Roy counted down the seconds till he could get off this damn pitch however when coach lasso called, he decided to fall back. by making sure Roy was the last one in the locker room and showers he could make sure he was as far back from Jamie Tartt who was running like he was being chased. if only it was Roy chasing him with a big stick.

anyone who spoke to him only received a grunt in return. as Roy came back from the showers with only a towel round his waist most of the team had left. Jamie was at his locker taking his stupid tongue out selfies as Issac said a quick goodbye to him, dodging Roys gaze as he and Collin split, Sam not far behind.

Roy inwardly smiled at the way Nathan ran out the room when he walked in. when he got to his locker the first thing, he did was check his phone to discover you were already here, so he quickly let you know he just had to get changed. when lasso and beard tried to say goodbye Roy just grunted as he pulled on his jeans.

when he glanced behind him, he was grateful to see Jamie finally sauntering out the room, not even bothering to say goodbye to his captain to which Roy was thankful for. when the door shut behind Jamie Roy let out a sigh of relief being the only one left in the room.

you however had decided not to wait in the car and just meet Roy in the locker room. you nodded and smiled to all the boys you passed but didn’t stop to talk since you weren’t there for them. as Isaac and colin left the two wondered how in the hell you and Roy worked considering you were always kind and happy whereas Roy was, well Roy.

You were barely able to slip passed ted and beard with just a howdy hello. However only one of the boys managed to stop you in your path, “Look who it is,” Jamie grinned, opening his arms out wide making you roll your eyes with a smile, “Its Mrs grampa,”

“Hello to you too Tartt,”

“Don’t worry love I won’t keep ya. Can’t risk grampa having to wait for his sponge bath,”

You rolled your eyes again as you kept walking, knowing full well Jamie was staring at your arse, “You’re just jealous he gets one and you don’t,” you grinned, excited to finally see your boyfriend after a long day.

“If you ever wanna be with a real footballer love you’ve got my number,” he said, clicking his tongue and firing finger guns at you before spinning on his heels and finally leaving.

you were laughing quietly as you opened the door to the locker room, finally laying eyes on your boyfriend. Roy looked up with a stone face, but a smile fell over it when he saw you, “What’s got you laughing then princess?” he asked as he fastened his belt.

“Just Jamie being a prick,” you said as you walked up to him. before Roy could start his impending rant, you looped your fingers in his belt loops, pulling him closer, “Sad I missed the show though,” you smirked, leaning up to kiss him.

Roy practically melted into your touch as his hand cupped your jaw, his other resting on your hip, “Im sure I could hit rewind for you,” he teased as he pulled back, his hands moving to your back to pull your body flush against his, “I’ve missed you,”

“You saw me this morning babe,” you laughed as your arms moved to rest over his shoulders.

Roy chuckled, his eyes glancing down, “Been thinking about you all day,”

“What about me specifically?” you teased, catching another quick peck.

his hands slid down your back slowly before he suddenly slapped your arse making you have yelped half squeal. “You know exactly what I’ve been thinking about. walking in here looking like this,”

“Looking like what?” you said, leaning in so your nose brushed against his.

“So, fucking fuckable,” he said, his voice somehow lower than before making your stomach do flips and knocking the butterflies all over the place, “Been thinking about those fucking lips all day,” Roy said before his lips crashed onto yours in a desperate messy kiss.

your hands gripped his hair making Roy groan into the kiss as his hands squeezed your hips tightly knocking the wind out of you. “Well, I can’t do much else with these lips till we get out of here,” you said, finally pulling away for air and walking backwards leading Roy towards the door.

“Says who?” Roy said, his hot breath fanning over your neck before his lips soon to kiss down your skin making you moan when he reached the crook of your neck. Roy moved you back till your back was against the locker room door.

“We can’t Roy,” you moaned, your grip tightening in his hair.

“Sure, don’t sound like you wanna stop,” he mumbled against your skin.

it had been a thought you’d had a lot, fucking Roy in the locker room. or really anywhere at Richmond. Roy had even said after his last win that he would’ve taken you on the pitch right then if he could. ever since the idea had been in your head and with the season just starting again it was seeming tempting, but you knew the cleaners would be coming round soon.

but not right now. Roy groaned when you pulled his head from your neck but his eyes about popped out his skull when he felt your hand on his belt buckle. “Seriously?” he asked, almost getting giddy about the idea as you unbuckled the belt, working quickly on the button of his jeans.

You hummed in response as you undid his zip, “Just my mouth though. for now,”

“Hey im not fucking complaining,” Roy grinned but his mouth fell open, a small moan from his lips when he felt your hand wrap around his cock, “Fuck babe wait- “he said making you almost pull your hand out his boxers but he grabbed your wrist to stop you, “Over here. so, we’re not in the middle of the room yeah?” he said as he led you over to the closest locker.

you laughed when you looked up at the locker, “You want me to suck you off in front of Jamies locker?” you said, still following Roy over.

“Cmon,” Roy groaned, his cock pulsing in your hand as he reached his enemies spot in the locker room, “This would be the ultimate fuck you. the fuck yous of fuck you,” he said as the backs of his legs hit the bench.

your hand moved from his dick, much to Roys dismay, to hold his shoulders. Roy was about ready to call it quits when he felt you push down on his shoulders, making him sit down on the bench. you stayed stood for a moment, your hand tracing over his jaw, “You Roy Kent, are a petty bitch,” you said as you slowly moved down onto your knees making Roy somehow get even harder, “Who I love,”

“I’ve never loved you more,” Roy said as he watched you with awe. you rolled your eyes as you leaned down to press a gentle kiss to his tip.

if you were going to do something so wrong you were going to do it right. you licked slow soft licks around his tip making Roy groan as his hand found its way into your hair, but he knew better than to rush you. he nearly gasped for air when he felt you lick down his shaft, your hand resting on the other side of his sensitive member.

you teased him for a few moments till you finally began to swirl your tongue around his tip before slowly sinking down his cock. Roy moaned, not caring if anyone was still here to hear him as your hands moved to cup his balls. his moans were all the encouragement you needed to keep going, your head bobbing down with an increasing pace as you felt his tip hit the back of your throat.

Roy felt like he could cum at any moment, but he wanted to enRoy this. his eyes were screwed up with pleasure but for some reason he felt the need to open them. when he did, he saw Jamie, standing at the other locker room door, his hand still on the handle and his jaw practically on the fucking floor.

having Jamie seeing this was somehow even better than him never knowing it happened. it took Jamie a moment to notice Roys eyes were open and when he met his captains eyes all Roy could do was smirk, leaning his head back to rest against the wall as Jamie stood there in awe. Roy wanted to enRoy this feeling, that was until he felt your cheeks hollow around his cock and his eyes screwed up in pleasure once more.

Roy knew he couldn’t wait any longer but when he went to tap your shoulder to tell you that, a signal you had decided upon months ago, you decided to keep going. Roy couldn’t contain himself any longer and he gasped as he felt himself spill his cum down your throat. your movements slowed but you didn’t pull your lips away till you had practically sucked all the life from the footballer.

when you pulled off, wiping your mouth with the sleeve of your shirt, you looked up to Roy with those doe eyes he loved so fucking much. seeing them made him reach down, pulling you in by your jaw to kiss you harshly. you heard some kind of click and you pulled back, glancing behind you, “Did you hear something?” you asked, slowly getting up from your suddenly sore knees.

“Nah,” Roy said as he helped you stand, getting up himself and zipping back up, “But we should go. gotta get you home so I can repay the favour,” he said making you giggle and rush towards the door, Roy slapping your arse as you went making you fake scold your boyfriend.

as you walked the halls Roy briefly wondered if he had taken it too far but after all it was Jamie, so he didn’t worry. then he wondered why Jamie hadn’t confronted him? was it actually Jamie that had seen him or some orgasm angle? if Jamie had down that to him Roy would’ve fucked him across the room and kicked the living hell out of him.

it must’ve been someone else Roy thought, trying his best to act casual as he walked with you to the parking lot. however, when Roy opened the door for you to walk into the car park, he looked up to see Jamie, sat his car eyes closed. Roy barked a laugh at the sight, making your head spin around looking for what was funny.

however, Jamie had heard your boyfriends laugh and by the time you spotted his car it was speeding out of the parking lot. You looked after the car, head tilted, “Jamies a weird one,” you said as you unlocked your car, and all Roy could do was laugh. next practise was gonna be the cats’ pyjamas.

Taglist: @clairacassidy @valeskafics

#ted lasso #ted lasso imagine #ted lasso x reader #ted lasson smut #ted lasso season one #roy kent #roy kent imagine #roy kent x reader #roy kent x you #roy kent x y/n #roy kent smut #roy kent fic #roy kent fanfiction #roy kent x jamie tartt #jamie tartt #jamie tartt x reader

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zozo-01 · 22 days

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"maybe god does love you enough to save you. maybe they were god all along."

This fic is part of the 'Hot Boi Summer Springback' Event ran by the Skyside Discord and organized by the lovely @angelicaether!! Thank you Aether and everyone else for participating in the event and you can read all of their fics on this master list here!!

For this I heard one line from Sam about how he wanted Darlin' ever since he's met them, and of course I had to fucking run with it!! Mix in a little religious trauma and boom!! Fic has been made. :) Thank you to @lovelylonerliterature for being my beta reader and @autisticempathydaemon, @cashandprizes and @horrorscoupes for being my IRL Sam Collinses, hehehe. (Also Lo, the other religious trauma fic is coming. >:3)

CW: Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Religious Guilt, sam was raised southern baptist and it shows, darlin isn't catholic but they were also raised religiously, Self-Hatred, sam hates himself for being a vampire , Mentioned Alexis (Redacted ASMR), Mentioned Quinn (Redacted ASMR), only by names and action, Blood Mention, Blood Drinking, Disordered Eating, he is a vampire after all and he hates it, Mentioned Character Death, Referenced Character Death, Mentions of Minor Injuries, darlin is involved so of course there are injuries, sam is going through an existential crisis while darlin is just there teehee

click here for the ao3 link!!!

There were two types of blood to Samuel Collins. The ones he could barely tolerate and the ones he downright detested. It took a while for some of the former to graduate into the latter, but he doubted that he would ever be the kind of vampire that would savour the taste of blood. It was fuel, barely even food to him.

He chugged another blood bag, following it with a sip of his bourbon. The alcohol burned down the tangy aftertaste, making it slightly easier to digest it. For the first time in a decade, he found himself in an intense hunger, almost as bad as his bloodlust. He couldn't figure out what it was. He didn't feel extra stress, nor was he exerting his magic all that much. Whatever the case was, the result was him downing more blood than he did during his newborn years.

He sighed, staring at the empty bag and cup in his hands. He would wonder what he did to deserve all of this, but he's known the answer since he was younger and brighter. Throwing the bag into the trash, he poured himself a full glass of his bourbon and flopped onto his couch. Sam took a swing, hoping to get rid of the residual blood clinging to his throat.

He hated himself for the fact that he needed blood to survive, he was a healer for God's sake. Yet he hated himself for hating himself in the first place, stuck in a vicious cycle that would never end. There was nothing wrong with drinking blood, it's the same principle of humans eating meat. Sometimes, the lion has to eat the gazelle in order to survive. The circle of life. But Sam couldn't help but feel disgusted, filth finding its way from heart and tainting his body.

Guilt ate him alive, his old prejudices coming back to haunt him. He's met wonderful vampires, both before and after his turning. And he would never think of Vincent as a monster. But he couldn't help the little thoughts in his head that the fact that he was a vampire was wrong. He was just a monster, a feeder and a leech. (It's funny how his father's voice haunted him to this day.)

Sam never understood the difference between drinking the supposed blood of Christ and this, one was deemed holy and the other made him a heathen. If he drank blood from a holy source, then would his sins be washed away? Was there a chance that if he swallowed his pride and walked to the altar with a chalice in hand, would God, the Forgiving, forgive him?

The vampire forsaken God long after he was forsaken. It didn't stop Sam from making small prayers when times got rough, despite the fact that He wouldn't hear him. Some habits die hard, he knows that all too well.

He wondered how long it would take for him to make peace with his new lease on life. There was no chance of trying to go vegan, he'd exhausted every avenue of research in that direction. Meaning this was it. There was nothing more he could do to save his damned soul. He loathes Alexis a little more each day he goes without the sun kissing his skin like it used to.

Daddy always said that he was a dirty sinner at heart, his soul was stained from birth. It made sense that his physical body would match his sinning core. Alexis was just God's punishment for the monster that he was. Maybe if he spent more time on his hands and knees, he would have escaped his fate.

(That didn't explain them though. There was no way that He would send them his way. If Alexis was his punishment, then they were his salvation. Yet the only reason he could conceive as to why they came into his life was to punish him harder, teach him a lesson he's spent his life internalizing. He'd only pray that they won't get caught up in his hellish flames.)

It took two cups of bourbon and a whole lot of water for Sam to finally stop gagging at the blood. Funny how when he was younger, he would lick his bloody lips as a showing of strength and pride. He felt powerful when he consumed his blood. Now look at him, disdain was all that was left of the broken man sitting on the couch.

Time travel was the only answer to his problem, going back to the past to tell his younger self that Alexis wasn't worth it. The fun and wild thrill she gave wasn't worth the utter agony that would come his way. At the very least, he would tell himself to make it clearer to her that he didn't feel the same. But he didn't, and he got exactly what he deserved.

There's no use living in the past, he told himself out loud. What's done is done and all he could do was make do with the hand life has dealt him. Staring out the window, the millions of stars stared back at him with judgment. Fuck them, who gave them the right to cast their holy gaze to him. Not when they stood high up on their throne in heaven. They had no idea how hard it was to stay pure down on Earth. Lucky bastards must be thrilled to watch him suffer for their entertainment.

(Doesn't that sound familiar? I'm talking about you.)

His residual anger was enough to burn the forest surrounding his forced home, but he had to get it under control. There was time to rage and lament to the world, but tonight wasn't it, not when they would be coming by shortly.

The partnership he had with Darlin' was tentative, despite him already saving their sorry ass. Both of them were still trying to feel the other out, ready to pounce if the other showed signs of traitorous actions. Beyond that, he could tell that Darlin' was a good person with their heart in the right place. A bit of a bleeding heart, something he didn't expect at all, but it was a welcome surprise. If they met in different circumstances, then things may have been different.

If they had been born earlier, or him later, then they may have caught each other on the D.A.M.N. Campus. He'd stare at them, hopelessly enamoured with the shifter that stood maybe a few feet away. How could he not, they were absolutely beautiful. Prettier than the songbirds that would fly by or the sun's light that formed a halo on their head. His buddies would laugh at him, dying that the Samuel Collins, fuckboy extraordinaire, fell in love. But hell must have frozen over, for he was a fool just for them.

He would saunter towards them, his flirty tone immediately dismantled by their smile. Yet his awkwardness would endear them for some reason and they would let him court them, something no one thought he was capable of.

He would lead them back to his house, laying them on his bed and showing them how much he loved them-

Sam's mouth dried up and his fangs started to ache at the thought of their body under him. Goddamn it, he needed another damn blood bag. Trudging back to the kitchen, he drained another bag, not bothering with a cup as he drank straight from the bourbon bottle to wash down the taste.

This was getting ridiculous. Absolutely, fucking stupid. He couldn't turn into a fucking newborn every time he thought about them. He shouldn't even be thinking about them like that. It was wrong, and indecent, and robbed them of autonomy. He felt like an abomination for even daring to fantasize about them. He was nothing but a sinner and he couldn't taint their light.

That didn't stop his fangs from elongating at the thought of their blood anyway. He couldn't help it. They were just so damn bright and wonderful, he had no choice but to forget his own immoral heart. When bathing in the rays around Darlin', there was nothing to focus on but them. Their enchanting laugh and crude jokes burrowed their way deep into Sam's heart, and they wouldn't be leaving any time soon.

And their blood, don't even get him started. Unfortunately for his lust and hunger (he doesn't want to call it love right now), he's had the chance to smell their blood quite often. From large gaping wounds that he would heal to that stupid blood-soaked jacket that Darlin' refused to let go, he's sure he knows their scent as well as the priest knows his congregation. Something about how shifters have more magic in their blood compared to other empowered people, but he knew that wasn't the reason.

It was just because it was Darlin' and that they were incredible and wonderful. It was no secret that they were a vampire magnet, catching all of their attention whenever the two went out. His own blood would curl and rage would flow through his veins, jealousy taking reign of his wicked heart. But he couldn't blame any of them. Most vampires look for salvation in the people they bite, hoping the magic in their blood will be enough to save them.

But they had more potent blood, even more than the average shifter. It had to have been a blessing for them, their magic so powerful and their blood being a reflection of that. He could tell from the moment they bled all over their couch, and it made every vampire obsessed with having the taste of their blood. Their blood smelled like the blizzards they faced and he wondered if it tasted as cold as they smelled. Or maybe their blood was as warm as their sunshine self.

Clearly, he wasn't any better than the vampires who'd grab them and bare their fangs to force their blood into their mouths. He was utterly disgusting.

Sam watched the clock on top of the fireplace. (He stared at the judging eyes looking back at him.) They should be here sometime soon, knowing they'd arrive five minutes early because they're just so damn respectful of his time. It would be easier to hate, or at the very least control his fondness for them if they were a little terrible. They were an asshole and a little shit, but awful? Never in a million years.

He had to find a way to curb his craving for them, out of respect for them and to remind himself that he didn't deserve good things. How he got addicted to a drug before he took it was beyond him. But they were absolutely magical so he wouldn't put it past the realm of possibility.

Exactly when he expected, he heard their motorcycle park itself in front of the porch. The roaring engine woke the butterflies in his stomach, having to stop himself from zipping around the house in excitement.

A few relaxing breaths later, Sam deemed himself ready to face Darlin'. His bloodlust was in control and his heart calmed down from the earthquake it was. He stood in front of the door, waiting for Darlin' to finally knock on the door and bless him with their parents.

An eternity later, soft knocks filled the air and his cheeks started to hurt with a smile. Of course, he gave a couple of seconds before he opened the door, not wanting to look desperate for opening the door immediately.

Eyes meeting theirs, Sam lost his breath for a few minutes. The stars he cursed earlier shone brightly in their eyes, galaxies swirling into a beautiful kaleidoscope of divine essences. His heart picked up again, giving up on controlling it and instead hoping that Darlin' can't hear the pounding in his chest.

(Momentary silence filled his brain when tranced by their gaze. He doesn't know how the fuck they did it. The voices that filled his head, of the father he abandoned and the women who condemned him, all went quiet with their smile. Only their sweet voice and unintentional sweeter words remained in his brain. Rosaries were nothing but decorative garbage to him, but they were able to silence the demons in his head. Who needs a cross when their protection was all a man needs?)

A hand waving in front of his face tore him from his thoughts. "Hello? Earth to the Cowboy? Anyone home?" they joked with him, but there was that twinge of concern in their voice. Too caring for his wicked heart.

"Yeah, everythin's good here, darlin'," he reassured, nodding while moving to the side to let the wolf in. He had to hold his breath when they walked by him, their sweet scent entering his nose and driving himself. Had he been a weaker man, he would have pinned them right where they stood, but he'd had enough experience beating himself for his desires.

Sam went into the kitchen to get some water for them, knowing that it's probably been a while since they drank a cup of water. The way they chugged down the water was all the indication he needed.

With water in their body, Darlin' got to the root of why they were there. Quinn had been sending some of his lackeys after them, to stalk and intimidate them to go back to him. So far, their efforts hadn't amounted to anything, just some poor bastards who were promised a bump in pay if they were able to bring them to him. But recently, Quinn had been sending stronger mercenaries their way. Nothing they couldn't handle, but the escalation was definitely concerning, for who knew what his next steps would be.

If his mother was here, she would have told Sam to send Darlin' off with a rosary and prayer. That would be enough to keep evil spirits away, himself included. Unfortunately for him, they would balk at the idea of having something to protect them, which was the only thing that was stopping him from becoming their bodyguard.

He had more selfish intentions though, the rotten thing he was. If he spends more time with Darlin', then he can silence the voices permanently. Their heavenly light could cast out the darkness entrenched in his heart.

Once they were finished venting about this recent development, they slumped in their seat, exhausted from their constant vigilance. Truly, they didn't deserve any hardships in life. They were too good to deserve anything like this. Blessed with a kind heart and strong resolve, why would it dare be wasted on a desolate place such as this?

God loves you, but not enough to save you.

"I didn't know you were religious," their questioning tone brought him out of his thoughts. He found it silly that they would ask a question like that until he saw what they were looking at.

It was an old crucifix on top of his fireplace, golden in colour and with various coloured gems. On it were the eyes that have been judging him since he left Mont Blanc. It had been a gift from his mother before he ran away, her way of blessing him on his journey. But it served more as a reminder of how far he's fallen from the golden boy he was all those years back.

The eyes of Jesus bore into his soul, asking him what was the point of him dying for his sins if he still turned out to be a heathen.

Hand waving in front of his face, he remembered that Darlin' was in the room with him. The heat from the crucifix's eyes died down, maybe wondering if they would deal their final blow to him.

"Yeah- um, my momma gave it to me 'fore I left home," he started to explain, finding any way to skirt this conversation and meaningfully answer their question. "She was a Southern Baptist at heart, thought a cross could save a life." He smirked at that sentiment, clearly it didn't do anything to save him. He didn't give himself any chances.

Their gaze was transfixed on the crucifix to the point where they didn't even look back to face him. Maybe it was a similar likeness that was calling out to each other? Who could know with that one.

"It's beautiful," their hazed voice filled the room. He looked back at the crucifix, not finding anything notable about it. It was just a wooden thing with a dead man on it. Nothing holy to worship, just a sign of empty promises made toward forgiveness.

If anything, the wolf in front of them was more worthy of worship and prayer, because he knew that any pact made with them would be worth it. Why pray to the dead when the living is so much better?

A genuine curiosity about their interest made him ask the question, "you religious growin' up too?" They never gave off the vibe of being God-fearing, but some people hide it better than others. Or learn how to not shove it down peoples' throats.

"I was, not Catholic though," they answered while finally turning back to face him. "Wasn't Southern Baptist either," they added with a chuckle. His wolf was filled with interesting little factoids. He couldn't imagine his Darlin' on their knees praying, but they always had a hopeful outlook that it was hard not to think they didn't believe in the divine. He hummed in acknowledgement, going back and sitting silently next to them.

"If you don't mind me asking…" their voice trailed in hesitation, a tell-tale sign that they were looking for permission to continue speaking. He nodded, giving them the OK to finish their question. Their eyes went back to the crucifix with a questioning look in their eye. "Why keep it around if you're not super religious?"

Sam understood it was a valid question to ask, even if he had a complicated answer to it. Was he supposed to tell Darlin' that he kept the cross around as his failure? That if he shut up and lived the life of pain that his parents laid out for him, then he wouldn't have ended up as the monster he was now. He hated himself and there was no one better than God to keep judging him.

"Well…" he stalled, trying to find a suitable answer. "I keep it as a reminder of where I came from," he started, only to scoff. "And where I don't want to go back to." He'd rather go through his accident again than go back to that hellscape. "'Sides, it's nothin' but a piece of wood. Ain't nothin' magical to it."

There was a contemplative look on their face, finding a way to choose their next words without touching on any sensitive subjects. Their narrowed eyes could burn a hole in the floor they were staring at and he could only wonder about the thoughts firing off in their head. (Really, he wondered if they ever thought of him with this level of intensity.)

"Do you believe in God?" they asked with a quiet tone. Now that was a question that he didn't expect from them.

"I just told ya I was raised religious," he snarked, "I don't know what you're tryin' to say."

They rolled their eyes, flicking his arm in protest of the teasing. "You're such an asshole, leech," they laughed it off and Sam was sure that was the sound of the seven trumpets. What a beautiful way to die.

They went quiet again, their eyebrows furrowed in curiosity. "You don't have to be religious to believe in God, ya know."

"Oh yeah? What 'bout you Darlin'? Do you believe in God?" he asked in retaliation, interested in what their answer would be. Part of him hoped that they didn't, that he was right in putting his faith in what he could see.

"I do," they said bluntly. It wasn't the answer he was hoping for, but he kept quiet to let them keep talking. "I was raised with the whole 'what's written with you is meant for you'. Basically, what God wants to happen will happen." They rest their head on Sam's shoulder and his arm instinctively wrapped around them. "I know most people don't like that idea, 'cuz it robs them of autonomy. But I don't know, I've always found it comforting. No matter how much bad shit happens to me, it won't be more than I can bear."

"And if it is too much for you to handle?" he questioned gently.

"Then God would write some comfort for me," they giggled. "I know it's stupid, but it's the little things that get me through the day." They yawned and made themselves comfortable on his shoulder. Sam could feel his heart pounding. "You still haven't answered my question."

He took one last look at Darlin', with their pretty face trying to fight off the exhaustion that caught up to them. He couldn't stop staring at their eyes. Sweet and forgiving, they were the eyes he wished would look at them whenever he went to church. They were what God's gaze was supposed to be, free from the hate and judgement he suffered from the congregation. Maybe if they were guiding him from the start, then none of this would have happened. They wouldn't allow any bad things to happen to him.

(Then again, if he was never turned then he wouldn't have met Darlin'. Or at least they would meet in a drastically different context. He wouldn't have the chance to fall in love with them. So maybe Darlin' was right that there was a light at the end of the tunnel for everyone. He just can't believe that he deserved that respite.)

Contemplation be damned, there was no point in thinking about the question when he already knew the answer. "Yeah, suppose I still believe in God, just found it on my own terms." They didn't need to know that they were the only God that he believed in. His mind already started building the shrines in their honour, wondering if they would ever be enough to share his love for them.

It was much easier than saying the words 'I love you'. He may never have the courage (or the right) to say those words.

"I'm glad… that you could tell me…" their voice teemed with yawns and sleep. He chuckled, of course Darlin' would push back on precious sleep in order to listen to his response. That simple action did more for him than any divine being he was forced to worship.

Gently as he could, knowing that Darlin' was a light sleeper, he picked them up and brought them to his spare bedroom. As much as he so wanted to bring them to his bed, that was a big step that neither of them were ready for. Hell, they haven't even hinted that it was something they would be interested in, and his heart wouldn't survive precious Darlin' sleeping in his bed. But it was ok, he would wait an eternity to be with them.

Sam watched them as they slept, eyeing the little details that they hid in their waking moments. Like how their eyebrows were so expressive, or the way their lip scar would stretch with their smile.

This was so very wrong. Watching them sleep, observing them so carefully, he was being a fucking creep for this. But he couldn't help but not look away. Darlin' was so reserved in their waking moments, and he wanted to see them at their most vulnerable. Even if he was tainting them with his corruption, leave him be! He deserves to be a remorseless, selfish thing once in a while. They were so endearing in their sleeping state, and he promised to always protect them in all of their glory. From their sweet eyes and beautiful body and split lip-

There was blood dripping from their face.

His mouth watered before the intoxicating scent hit his nose. Sam froze where he stood, torn between the want to lick the blood of his face and the need to leave. His heart versus his conscience. He had fed only an hour ago and of course, their blood was enough to make him starve again. His shaky hands wiped the blood from their face and then quickly cleaned it off with a napkin in his pocket, not even giving himself the chance to taste it.

He ran out of the room, locking the door behind him to keep them safe from him. His chest heaved with panic, heart racing a marathon. It wasn't fair that Darlin's blood had this much of an effect on them, but it wasn't their fault either. This was Sam's problem to deal with, and he'd be damned if he made his Darlin' feel guilty over something they had no control over.

Calming himself to a reasonable point, he made his way back to the kitchen. Sam opened up the damn fridge to grab another damn blood bag and a bottle of bourbon, sliding onto the floor and chugging it all over again. If only he was normal, then he would just slip into bed and cuddle his wolf, and not run out at the sight of something as simple as blood.

At this point, he's sure that Darlin' would never want him. They've told him little bits and pieces about their relationship with Quinn, and how absolutely vile he was to them. From biting them without their consent to pressuring them into taking care of him, it's no wonder that they would be a little hesitant to jump into another relationship with a vampire. He had his own gripes with Alexis. But Sam was coming to the awful realisation that he was more like Quinn than he thought.

Shame and disgust filled his throat once again. It wasn't fair that Darlin' was stuck with monster after monster, they deserved so much better than him. Yet he couldn't help the jealous bile that filled his mouth at the thought of Darlin' with another person. What an awful predicament.

He gazed back at the crucifix with judging eyes. Only they weren't as harsh this time. Still judging as ever, but this time there was a hint of… was it encouragement? That wasn't the right term, but it was as if they were nudging him on a certain path. If he was truly willing to repent and walk the path of salvation, then somehow Darlin' would be a part of that journey.

He let out a wistful laugh, finding it impossible that Darlin' would ever want to waste their time 'fixing' him. But there was a corner of his heart, one where a sliver of light made its presence known.

Maybe God does love you enough to save you. Maybe they were God all along.

#redacted asmr #redacted audio #redacted fanfic #redacted sam #redacted darlin #IM GOING BACK TO MY ROOTS #TO MY FAVE COUPLE!!!!#hot boi summer springback #zo writes tingz #this is zo speaking

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quinn-fucks-shit-up · 1 month

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i just binge listened to tmagp at midnight and I have THOUGHTS

1) Collin is absolutely my fav, literally so Miles O'Brian coded, or rlly any ST engineer, I just say O'Brian because of the whole cardassian/German language barrier thing

2) Alice/Gwen is already happening, I see the enemies to lovers arc and it is inevitable. wlw ftw.

3) MY DEAD GAY GOTH SON IS ALIVE

4) so it Gertrude, love that bitch, hope Agnes is also doing well

5) needles is just as hilarious as everyone said, can't wait to see more of this insecure little guy, I wonder if he does cross stitch in his free time

6) they were literally IN THE ARCHIVES, so close, yet so far. I miss you tape recorder click

7) I fucking love the vast, more vast pls pls pls

8) thank you Mr Jonny writerman Sims for making Mr Blobby somehow worse????

9) I can't wait to see where all the forms Sam's doing are going, perhaps some remnant of statement filing, maybe it's Jon sending the forms and he's getting power from the weird shit Sam's writing, it's definitely important though

10) Georgie mention??? we better get some Admiral action or istg

#tmagp #the magnus protocol #tma #the magnus archives #collin becher #alice dyer #gwen bouchard #jonathan sims #gerry keay #gertrude robinson #needles tmagp #im literally going insane #its so good already #im not going to be listening to any more this late again though #that was a dumb move #im a scaredy bitch #gn

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anexistingexistence · 8 months

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In honor of my name card post reaching 500 notes for some godforsaken reason, here's more of that as a thank you to everyone who enjoyed that post:

Vincent "You're the Lovely of My Life" Solaire

Sam "No violence unless it's hot and deserved" Collins

Lovely "Punches holes into walls as a hobby" Solaire

Alexis "I need to be really careful with what I put here or the fandom will hunt me down" Getty

Porter "Who?" Solaire

William "Are you even allowed to drink wine with your meds old man?" Solaire

Adam "Insert the bisexual anthem here" Jessup

Quinn "Swiper no fucking murder" Fox

Bright "Trespassing" Eyes

Frederick "What do you mean 'therapy'? I can't afford that" Collins

#redacted audio #redacted asmr #redactedverse #redacted vincent #redacted sam #redacted lovely #redacted alexis #redacted porter #redacted william #redacted adam #redacted quinn #redacted bright eyes #redacted frederick #fun little fact:#when we first heard quinn's full name #i actually had hope that it was spelled “faulks” and was just pronounced “fox”#the tumblr people quickly proved me wrong

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sotwk · 4 months

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I was wondering who are your fancasts for your headcanon world?

<33

Hiiii Quickie! @quickslvxrr

Am I right in guessing that your question was prompted by my reblog of your reblog of Charlie Hunnam's gif set? XD

Because if so, I will just say that I am very excited to have selected Charlie as my fancast for Théodred of Rohan! (Excited because I hope to start writing chapters of my Eomer x OC fic soon, which actually co-stars dear Théodred.)

I have a growing fancast list for the SotWK AU! I still need to get around to making an official and complete list, but since you seem curious, here is majority of what I have so far.

Apart from Reader Insert stories I write in response to requests, all fics and characters I create are grounded in the SotWK AU, so these characters exist consistently across and crossover between my stories.

SotWK AU Fancast List (a work in progress)

The Royal Family of the Woodland Realm

Elvenking Thranduil - Lee Pace

Elvenqueen Maereth - Jennifer Connelly

Crown Prince Mirion - Henry Cavill

Prince Turhir - Sam Heughan

Prince Arvellas - Rupert Friend

Prince Gelir - Sam Claflin

Prince Legolas - Orlando Bloom

Crown Princess Itarildë - Teresa Palmer

(later Crown) Prince Aranion - Bradley James

Princess Anariel- Gabriella Wilde

Elvenking Oropher - Jason Isaacs

Greenwood Elves

Darthol (Gelir's birth-mate) - Dan Stevens

Olondir (cousin of the Thranduilions) - Jake Gyllenhaal

Rivendell Elves

Elrond - Hugo Weaving

Celebrían - Connie Nielsen

Nimeithel (oc cousin of Celebrían & mother of Itarildë) - Rebecca Ferguson

Elladan - Richard Madden

Elrohir - Sebastian Stan

Silmarillion / First Age Ancestors

Glorfindel - ???? -still searching!-

Elemírë (oc wife of Glorfindel & sister of Elenwë) - Vanessa Kirby

Maglor/Kanafinwë - Ben Barnes

Velcálë (oc wife of Maglor) - Zendaya Coleman

Círdan the Shipwright - Iain Glen

Eäriel (oc wife of Círdan) - Olivia Hussey

Eärondir (oc son of Círdan & father of Maereth) - Alexander Skarsgard

Laurinwen (oc mother of Maereth) - Lily Collins

Dwarves / Line of Durin

Durin III, King of Khazad-dûm- Hugh Jackman

Frerin, son of Thrain - Gerard Butler

Gondorians

Aerdis (oc love interest of Boromir) - Freida Pinto

Anarlas (brother of Aerdis) - Oscar Isaac

Imrahil, Prince of Dol Amroth - Eric Bana

Ivriniel - Isabella Rossellini

Finduilas - Monica Bellucci

Erchirion - Adam Driver

Lothíriel - Gal Gadot

Rohirrim

Théodred - Charlie Hunnam

Signyr (oc shield-maiden & Éomer's love interest) - Katheryn Winnick

Léodor (oc in Éomer's Éored) - Chris Hemsworth

Héothain (oc in Éomer's Éored) - Will Poulter

Haradrim

to be revealed OC - Pedro Pascal

YUP. I almost didn't want to insert that little spoiler of my upcoming fic, but I'm just too excited about fancasting the widely adored Pedro Pascal in my AU. It will be one heck of a character, too! I am SO VERY excited to create Harad OCs (Pedro's will be the main one)!

Thank you for the Ask! Although this list is still messy and incomplete, answering it puts me one step closer to getting an official fancast list done! :)

Just tagging people whom I think/hope might be interested in this:

@hobbitwrangler @scyllas-revenge @ass-deep-in-demons @emmanuellececchi @from-the-coffee-shop-in-edoras @konartiste @hippodameia @a-world-of-whimsy-5 @achromaticerebus @aduialel @asianbutnotjapanese @entishramblings @heilith @ladyweaslette @laneynoir @quillofspirit @stormchaser819 @g-m-kaye @mirra-kan @alwayssevvy @marsharmonicorchestra @laurfilijames @coopsgirl @jane0error @jezzibee @lathalea @cuarthol

Other useful links:

Introduction to SotWK

SotWK HC Masterlist

Fanfiction Masterlist

Fanfiction Request Guidelines

#sotwk answers #sotwk oc #sotwk headcanon #sotwk fancast #lotr #tolkien #tolkien oc #lotr oc #lord of the rings #greenwood the great #thranduil #thranduilion #mirkwood elves #gondor #rohan

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castielstwigandberries · 7 months

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if the supernatural movie doesnt include a reference to

nevada and georgia turning blue, stop the count, destiel making putin resign, sherlock season 5 rumors, destiel news meme, which political person had to be briefed on what destiel is now?, jensen looks like he was holding back homophobic slurs, weird cuts in the confession scene, which way was dean thrown now?, bury your gays speedrun, gay angels get send to superhell/eeby-deeby/cas plinko, recognizing the confession scene only by the first letters of each word, 'homosexual declaration of love', The Tapes™ (Release them now jensen!!!), meta analysis after 15x18, 'i gripped you tight and raised you from perdition' callback as dean saves cas from the empty, why lamp?, onion field, pizza man montage, parallels be paralleling, dean screaming cas name so loud in one take that people heard it blocks away, dean offering to kill sam if it means chuck brings cas back, the 4 year old son of lucifer becoming god, chuck won theory, 'we explore the nature of destiel in act two', excitement for a long finale which could only be about dean saving cas, right?, the insanity inducing quotes of the day for episodes, 'the night we met' and 'angel with a shotgun' songs of the day on set, filming in a barn, worst finale ever (even worse than game of thrones), weirly short with 11 scenes cut, two thirds montages, carry on wayward son playinf twice, back to back, one a weird cover version, vampmimes, no cas in the finale but instead some random vampire from season one no one remembers, dean finally gets nailed from behind, dean dies from tetanus, party city wig, good cars go to heaven, Car/Cas and Biden/Bi!Dean/Bye!Dean, 'cas helped', blurry wife, misha and jensen are not in the thank you video, everyone was supposed to be at the roadhouse originally but no one was informed of those plans, walker backdoor pilot, covid/capitalism destroyed everything, misha was in vancouver for filming the last episodes and was in less episodes than he was contracted for, misha denies ever having been in vancouver, misha says originally he was supposed to be in the finale as jimmy, misha says cas was supposed to be in the finale and 'sidle up to dean in the roadhouse', heterosexual destiel whose kisses would have created entire universes, destiel reciprocated in spanish, rogue translator, #TheySilencedYou, Jensen Ackles sexy silence, jensen ackles longcon, deanbenny breakup in season 8 script leak, Heller Obama, fake italian dub, misha collins x bill clinton sex scandal, misha addressing the "scandal" and tagging bill clinton and monica lewinski, 'still beautiful, still dean winchester', mishapocalypse 2.0 and 3.0, 'eyes like the sky' beer from jensens brewery rumored to be misha description, cockles anniversay photo, chaos machine jensen ackles' production company, 'rainbow road' beer close to deans birthday, blue green ('destiel') shotglasses from jensen brewery, ash and ellen's actors roleplaying roadhouse reopening in twitter, people think they are planning destiel wedding, disappointment when thats not the case, fans celebrate Destiel Wedding anyway on Valentine's Day 2021, fallout with both actors after one said a 'queer interpretation would damage the integrity of the show',

*takes a deep breath*

jared calling cas junkless and comparing his love for dean to the love he has for his children, misha collins cameo including 'still beautiful, still dean winchester', saileen and midam wedding, spn prequel announcement and subsequent j2 fallout, '@/robbiethompson et tu brute wow. what a trully awful thing you've done #bravo you coward', the prequel being about the least favourite characters of supernatural and a love story disproved by canon, 100000 destiel fics on ao3, misha tweets about that, rumors if mishas secret ao3 account, real italian dub going 'you're kinda okay' instead of i love you, misha tweeting a video of him saying 'te amo' in response to that', jensen saying if there'd been more time he (he meant dean but he used first person pronouns) would have hugged cas and said 'i love you too', first anniversary, misha collins coming out as bisexual on accident and then saying he 'happens to be straight' three days later in a five post apology thread, hot sauce from adam/micheal actor advertised by him playing midam, casbaiting in the winchesters trailer, jarlos shipping by winchester main actors, dean with beard and turtleneck, jensen saying he wanted misha in the winchesters but it didnt work out because of scheduling conflicts but hed be there in a season two shortly before the show was cancelled, death of the rogue translator and destiel getting dragged to the trending page every time there is news

*panting* then i dont want it.

yes this is all i could remember without looking it up

#supernatural #spn #destiel #nov 5th #my post

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halscafe · 4 months

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brown 🤎✨

A quick mini-fic of Darlin's POV during the end of their conversation with Sam in, "Talking About the Future With Your Vampire Mate."

CW: Small mention of my personal HC of Darlin's eye colour

“We’ll do whatever is the best version for us. and I'll support you in whatever decision you make….Can I hold you?”

His voice held that tenderness that I’ve grown to love and appreciate so much. As he held me and looked at me with his sparkling, silver eyes, I thought about a lot.

Sam Collins.

Samuel collins to some, the Duke of the Solaire clan to others.

But to me, he was Sam.

The Sam I couldn’t thank enough for running into me that day in WonderWorld on my hunt for Quinn.

The Sam who brought me peace when I never thought I deserved it.

If you once asked me if I would ever exchange my treasured life as a shifter with one of a vampire, I wouldn’t give it a second thought. But, as I stared into the eyes of the man who taught me what love was, the choice was no longer black or white.

Would I be able to stare into the mirror and recognize the figure staring back at me. My dark eyes turned bright, and my wolf canines being transformed to those of a vampire. Did intrusive thoughts like these plague Sam after his turning?

I love the man Sam is today, but would I love the person I became tommorow?

As I shifted my head from his chest, I gazed into his beautiful features and softly asked, “What colour were your eyes when you were human?”

I could feel his energy shift once I asked. It was a moment before he answered with a thoughtful and solemn look on his face: “Brown. My eyes were brown.”

Brown. Just like mine. A part of me couldn’t imagine him with brown eyes since I’ve grown to associate Sam with the beautiful twinkle of his grey irises. At the same time, thinking of him with brown eyes brought a smile to my face. I couldn’t explain why, it just felt so perfectly Sam. Both the colours captured his essence perfectly.

“I bet they were beautiful. Just as beautiful they are now.”

tagging my fav sam fans @haradasaya and @zozo-01 <3 LUV U GUYS

#the way I sprinted to write this up #the video was just MWAH #it hit the angst-hungry part of my heart perfectly #redacted asmr #redacted audio #redacted sam #redacted darlin #redacted spoilers

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cheynovak · 5 months

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A new beginning

Reader x Misha Collins

Warnings: 16+ Sex, fluff, trauma, commitment issues, jealousy, Age difference...

Side note: English isn’t my first language.

Words: 6172

Y/N and Misha became friends after Jensen introduced the two of you at his birthday party. Even though Y/N is a lot younger than Misha, Jensen saw a perfect match between you two. But... will Y/N and Misha feel the same way?

*not my GIF*

-----------------------

“There he is!” Y/N said smiling while walking up to Jensen with his gift. “Sorry had no time to wrap it. Happy Birthday buddy!” She kissed him on his cheek. “Thank! I’m glad you made it.” He said. “Well, Jack and Karl are here already, somewhere.” “Don’t worry I’ll find them.” She winked at him before leaving him in the hands of the guest who arrived after you.

Y/N was the newest member of “the boys” cast, she plays an old love interest of soldier boy who became a villain after Soldier boy chose Crimson Countess, the type of supe Butcher loves to manipulate to fight for him. The crew and cast made you feel at home right away even though you just started to film. Y/N became quite quickly friends with Jensen and Karl, and of course they found out that Y/N was a supernatural fan growing up. In a couple of months, she would turn 28 but whenever interviewers talked about how Jensen feels working with such a young girl on the show, he always said the same thing. “She is younger, but a very mature person, would even say and old soul.” And that is exactly how she felt, an old soul in a young body. She always had a better connection with people who were a little older.

After a few hours, food and drinks Jensen made his way towards you and the guys. “This must be so surreal for Y/N.” Jack said. You all looked at his with a confused look. ”Didn’t she once admit being a supernatural fan? And all the actors are standing, what, 3 feet away.” Y/N shook her head while smiling and slightly blushing. “Who is your favourite?” Karl decided to at oil to the fire. “Oh no, we are not going down that road!” Y/N said. “Ah come on!” Jensen bumped your shoulder. “Was it Dean?” He asked teasingly. “I think she is more of a Sam girl.” Jack teased. “No, no actually I was a Dean girl.” Y/N admitted “Until season 4.” She looked at Jensen, who thought about that for a second. “CASTIEL!” He said very surprised but seem to like your answer. She smiled shyly.

Later that night Y/N decided to head back to the hotel, she had to take her fight back to LA in the morning. So, she asked Danneel where Jay was before leaving without saying a word. Y/N placed her hand on his shoulder. “Hey buddy I’m heading out. Got a flight tomorrow.” “Oh no, wait one second, I want you to meet someone.” Jensen said while taking her wrist and walking her trough the crowed. And before she could see or say anything she hears Jensen: “Mish! Meet Y/N, Y/N Misha... She really likes you.” He said with a grin wide smile before leaving you standing in front of him with eyes wide open. Looking nervous, like a fangirl at ComiCon meeting her hero. “I eh, hi.” Y/N managed to say giving him a hand. ”Hi...” “This is awkward, isn’t it?” Y/N smiled shyly. “A little... But It’s ok.” He smiled friendly. ”Eh, how do you know Jensen?” “The Boys.” Y/N answered shortly. The two of you started to talk and surprisingly the awkwardness quickly disappeared. But as much as you liked the conversation, that had you staying there for another 90 minutes, you had to get some hours of sleep before getting on the plane.

The next morning

Y/N was sitting at the gate with her hoody and headphones on, listening to music while looking at other people in the airport, sipping her coffee trying to stay awake. That night she didn’t had much sleep thinking about the conversation she had with Misha, he did seem really nice, she could see why he was still friends with Jensen. But most of all Y/N wished she had given him her number. As she was scanning the crowd, she noticed someone familiar, Misha, he was sitting at the same gate as her, sunglasses, coffee and hoodie. Even though they had talked the night before she was nervous to go and talk to him. The voice on the intercom announced that they while start boarding now and Misha got up and quickly moved in line. Y/N could see his broad shoulders, how amazing would it be if they would end up sitting next to each other, but he probably flies first-class she thought.

But to her surprise he didn’t, he sat a couple of rows ahead of her, she had to pass him for going to her seat. Misha recognised her, “Y/N! Hi, what a coincidence!” He got up quickly hugged her before she held back the people behind her. “I know right! Have a good fight!” She said way to enthusiastic. During boarding Misha kept looking back to see where she was seated noticing the seats next to her were empty. Once in the air Y/N started to read a book to make sure she wouldn’t be looking at Misha every two seconds.

Little did she know that he did look at her a few times, hoping she would look at him. But after a while he got up and moved to sit next to her. Y/N was a little surprised, “Would you mind if I sit next to you?” “No! Of course not!” - “So, LA? What are the plans?” He asked casually. “Home, I rent a house there. Just a little break between projects. You?” “For now, home. We’re trying to sell the house, but I live there for now.” Y/N knew he and his wife had split up, she, like all the other fans had read his poems, but she decided not to get into detail about that.

Misha and Y/N started to talk some more. “So, Jensen said you liked me? What did he mean?” Misha asked with an innocent smile. “They asked me who my favourite SPN character was... I said Castiel.” “Aaah, I get it. So, you don’t like me me ... You like Cas me.” he laughed. “Yeah, I’m so terribly sorry.” Y/N joked. Y/N and Misha soon found out that they had a few similar interests, both loved to read, music and art. Y/N painted in her spare time while Misha wrote poetry, one couldn't do what the other did but, admired the art form of the other. Y/N showed him drawings and paintings of her own, While Misha read some of his drafts. The plane seemed to land way to fast, neither of them wanted to end the conversation but when they were safe and sound on the ground and got their luggage, they said goodbye. “Well, I see that my cap is here.” Misha said, “It was nice to talk to you again!” Y/N nodded “Likewise!” Misha hugged her and turned to the taxi driver. “Oh, Misha! Before I forget.” Y/N yelled. “Here is my number.” She wrote it on a small piece of paper she had in her jacket. “If you, I don’t know, want to talk or hang out sometimes, I would like that.”

Misha got in the taxi, thinking whether he should call her, she seemed nice, but he was afraid he would expect more of him than he could offer. Especially now, even though he and Vicky had been separated for a while he wasn’t ready to date. He needed to focus on being a dad, actor and healing his mental wounds.

Y/N noticed Misha’s face when she gave him her number, he looked scared, maybe even a little hurt. She hoped she didn’t offened him by doing so. It was days later when she got a text from him, Y/N thought she wouldn’t hear from him again.

Mish: “Free this afternoon?”

Y/N: “Jup, why?”

Mish:”Lunch? 1 pm?”

Y/N:” Count me in!”

Y/N googled the place he had suggested, and decided to dress casually, but catches herself taking a little more afford in her hair and make-up than she would usually do.

Misha noticed her walking in, long summer dress, sunglasses, matching bag, she smiled when she noticed him. “Hi again.” she said while giving him a hug and kiss on the cheek. “You look great! I feel underdressed.” Misha said. “Nonsense, by the way this place looks amazing!” Y/N answered looking around. After they both ordered Y/N decided to ask him about his reaction at the airport. ”Misha, maybe it’s not my place or question to ask, and if so, please let me know but, I couldn't help but notice the panic in your eyes when I gave you my number. Did I do something wrong?” Misha let out a breath before answering. “Well, I don’t know how much you know about my personal life. But I am recently divorced, and I didn’t want to give you the wrong impression. Because I am far, far from ready to date.” Y/N nodded very understanding still listening, “And Jensen wanted me to meet you for quit sometime now, I had no idea what he said to you before introducing so, I panicked a little.” “I see, it was never my intention to date you, I just like that we get along.” She smiled.

“Great, because I could use a friend who isn’t connected to my marriage, especially here, closer to home. That’s what happens when you’ve been together since school, your friends become her friends and vice versa.” “I understand and consider me your new friend.” Y/N smiled “But eh, Jay talked about me?” “Yes, days before the party, said you were an amazing woman, who I might like... You know a friend trying to help.” “Is that so...” Y/N got up from her chair, “Let’s send him a thank you for our new friendship texted.” Squatting next to Misha holding your phone to take a selfie. “What are you going to say?” He asked taking a sip of his drink.

“Thanks Jay. Found myself a new friend... No worries won’t replace you... Yet 😉 Xx."

Y/N send the picture to Misha as well.

Once home Misha opened the DM from Y/N and truly looked at it for the first time. He liked that his smile was genuine but couldn’t help to notice that she was a lot younger than he was. What are you worrying about, he thought, you just told her to be friends nothing more.

+ 10 months later

Y/N and Misha grew closer in the near year they known each other now, at first hanging out whenever his kids weren’t with him and when they didn’t have project to work on. Later they met her and started to call her aunty Y/N. And of course, they supported each other.

Misha and Jensen had a convention to go to. Some die-hard fans had noticed Misha hanging out with Y/N in public and seem to have question about that. Both men told the story the way it was. Met each other and became friends. But one fan had a question that lingered in Misha’s mind. “Jensen, you and Y/N have a, let’s call it spicy scene together, what was it like to film something like that, and Misha since you are their friend, have you seen it, and what were your thoughts?”

Jensen answered the question first. Saying filming something like that is always awkward, but that because they became friends, they had their fair share of laughs that day. Misha had to be honest he hadn’t seen the latest season yet. Realising he never talked to Y/N about it, while she seemed up to date with his projects, supporting him, wishing him luck. So, he decided to watch the season at home. Mid-season the scene the fans talked about played, Misha noticed a strange feeling seeing Y/N getting al hot and heavy with Jensen, well he knew it was Soldier boy and her character but still. He felt a knot in his stomach, could it be jealousy? Not a second later he received a text.

Y/N: “Made dinner... way too much... Hungry?”

Mish: “Be there in 20?”

Y/N: ”Perrrrrrfect!”

“I’m sorry, I'm already in my comfy clothes.” She said answering the door in her short shorts and tank top with fluffy slippers. “So, what were you up to today?” Y/N asked while walking Misha to the kitchen. ” Not much, started watching the boys.” He said drawing out her reaction. “Really! What season?” Y/N answered enthusiast - “The last one.” - ”Oooh, you seen me naked yet?” she said teasingly wiggling her brows. - “Actually, the second before you texted.” He admitted laughing at the face she made. Y/N looked dramatic like he just had a kick to the balls. “I am so sorry for that traumatic experience.” - “Yeah, could have giving me a heads up.” he smirked - ”Hey, if you would have told me you were watching it, I might have. Or better would watch it with you just to see your face.” She said smiling turning to the oven to get the last dish out. While she bent over Misha couldn’t help but staring at her curves, feeling busted like a teenager when she turned around.

After dinner Misha helped her with the dishes, “Why did you start to watch the boys?” Y/N asked out of the blue. “Really didn’t think that was your thing.” Looking over her shoulder while Misha placed a dried plate on the clean table. “It isn’t, but I figured, you follow me and compliment me on everything I do. As a friend I could at least watch your work.” Y/N hummed in response. “I appreciate that.” she answered with a little tear in her eye.

Little did Misha know Y/N just had a date that went terrible. Some rude new rising star her age. The first and last thing that came out of his mouth was how much slimmer Y/N seemed in the boys and in pictures. How he thought she could lose weight if she trained with him and that she better not wear high heels, making her taller than him... after that night Y/N really didn’t want to be alone, and could use a familiar face.

“Are you crying?” Misha notice. “It’s nothing.” She answered quickly before turning back to the dishes. “Did I do something wrong?” He asked really worried, “Oh no, really, it’s nothing... I just had a really bad date.” Misha’s heart dropped... “Date? I didn’t know you were dating.” He tried to sound as an interested friend. “Yeah, one of my friends set me up.” She said still cleaning the same dish. “All he did was talking about my weight and height.” Y/N turned to Misha. “I mean, I know I’m taller than the average woman but fat? I worked day and night at the gym before shooting the boys, I weight more then with muscles than now.” Misha felt sorry for her. “Oh honey”, he pulled her in is arms holding one hand on her hair and the other between her shoulders. “You are perfect. And if that boy can’t see it... then you need to find yourself a man who can.”

Y/N looked up at Misha, seeing his worried blue eyes looking at her, like she seen them so many times before, but there was something more to them now. Before she knew it Y/N stood on her toes and kissed his lips, brushing her lips softly over his, when she moved away, Misha’s lips followed hers. Holding his hands on her neck and cheeks, after the kiss he kept his eyes closed a little longer, Y/N waited for his reaction. He opened his eyes, but instead of being relieved Y/N noticed the same panic she saw at the airport. “I’m sorry... I have to go.”

“Misha, wait!” Y/N followed him to the door. “Please, I’m sorry I should have never... But please, I really don’t want to be alone tonight.” She noticed he was thinking about her words without looking at her. “I’m sorry I promise I won’t try and kiss you again. I’m just afraid...” “Why?” He turned around. “I’m afraid if you walk out that door, I might lose my best friend. Please let me prove to you that this doesn’t have to be complicated.” Misha looked at his feet. “Y/N, it’s already complicated, I kissed you back. I wanted to kiss you for so long, I would love nothing more than kissing you every time I’m with you.” - “Why didn’t you?” “You, me... us...The age difference...” He shook his head.

“ Age? That is what’s holding you back? I don’t care about age Mish.”

“Maybe not now, but in 10 or 20 years maybe. I’m not settling for less. I don’t want my kids to go through something like the divorce again.” Y/N was surprised “Neither do I, you think I will settle down for les? Misha soon I’m going to be 30, no husband no family...” But he didn’t let her finish “Family, another thing, I have kids, you want kids of your own, you said that before. I’m too old to have another baby. You want to get married, I’m not sure I want to, again.” - “So, basically you made a decision for me of what I want, without talking to me about it?” Y/N said frustrated and hurt. “Maybe I’m willing to give some things up, or we could find another solution.” “Y/N, I don’t want you to give up anything for me.” He hugged her “I talk to you soon.” And left through the door.

It had been two weeks, Y/N and Misha didn’t meet up or called each other. Y/N had texted him a few times, but his response was short and cold. Her calls stayed unanswered.

Y/N:” Are you still mad at me?”

Mish:”Never was.”

Y/N: ”Can we talk?”

Mish:”No time.”

Y/N: “Mish please, I miss you...”

Jensen saw the texted messages between them, he had noticed Misha being less happy off stage than he was the last couple of months. And whenever there was a question about Y/N he kept his mouth shut. “Dude, I’m serious, pick up your phone and call her!” - “And tell her what? I’m sorry I've been avoiding you?” - “For starters, yes. I don’t get it, you like her, she likes you. You both live in the same town, when you talk about her, we all see the Misha we’ve been missing the months before, during and after your divorce.” Jensen added. “There is more to it than liking each other.” Misha answered his friend. “Like, my kids, the age difference.” Jensen rolled his eyes. “Age difference... Stop pretending she is underaged, Misha she turned 28 last month. Y/N clearly doesn’t care, and your kids love her! Listen, all we want is for you to be happy.” He placed his hand on Misha’s shoulder. “And you are happy when you are with her.” But even then, he shakes his head no, he couldn’t believe Y/N loved him that much.

Y/N’s phone buzzed, like a teenager she ran towards it, a text from Jensen. Y/N sighs while opening the message.

Jay:“I tried to talk to him. He is stubborn.”

Y/N:” You know? What did he say?”

Jay:”He didn’t say much, but I’m not blind, he needs time to see that what he feels isn’t a bad thing.”

Y/N: ”I just what my friend back Jay. If he doesn’t want more that is fine for me.”

Jay:”I'm not giving up yet.”

Y/N: “Thanks Xx.”

Another week radio silent. Y/N had tried to call him a couple of times, but he never answered.

Misha was desperately trying to hold on to the thought that if he stayed away for long enough, she would find someone, fall in love and be happy. Then they could both move on. But Jensen’s words lingered in his mind, and he was right. His kids love Y/N, she made them laugh, played in the garden with them and even took them to the carnival when Misha had to work from home. She took care of him and his kids while he wasn’t his best.

After thinking and doubting he took is phone to call her. But instead, he saw a notification of TMZ first with the headline. “ Y/N Y/L/N/ single no more?” Misha felt his stomach turn, the first thing he saw was a picture of Y/N with Karl walking out of a restaurant, and other one laughing, having a few beers at a pub in London, her face close to his while he was saying something to her. She seemed to have a great time with him. He opened the article to read.

Last night Y/N Y/L/N (28) and Karl Urban (51) were spotted having a romantic time in downtown London.

Both actors were spotted at a restaurant and later in a pub having a few drinks clearly enjoying each other's company. An inside source told us that the young actress is enjoying her single life even though she is ready to settle down with the right man.

In her latest interview Y/N told LAD bible she didn’t care about age, is this her way of proving her words? Maybe she was referring to Karl all along!

The actress clearly likes her man slightly older, let us not forget she has been seen often with Misha Collins (49) in LA, although they confirmed their relationship to be strictly friendship, Urban and Y/L/N haven’t confirmed nor denied the rumours yet. But the chemistry between the two is inevitable, as you can see in the interview with both actors down below.

Misha closed his phone, feeling bad, he thought seeing her moving on would make it easier for him to let her go. But instead, he felt awful.

And to top it all off, Karl posted a week later a recap of the press tour they did, on Instagram. Misha scrolled through the pictures stopping when he saw one were Y/N and Karl were holding each other in a side hug, and another one, were Karl stood behind her, he had his arm around her neck, Y/N sticking her tongue out, they lifted their middle finger and winked at the camera. With the caption Love this city – Y/N had reacted ... Love these people.

When he clicked on to her page, she had also posted pictures with the cast. And another one with Karl, laughing extremely hard a little blurry and the “good picture” were they posed on the red carpet in front of the boys logo, with the caption: No one will ever be as entertained by us as us with a little red heart. Karl’s comment: Admit it... Life would be boring without me. Misha noticed all the reactions from fans how much they loved her, how cute they were. It was too much to see.

Y/N got back to LA, really glad she decided to go on press tour, she told Karl about what happened, and as a good friend he made sure she forgot about Misha every now and then. But once home her feelings came running back, she got tired of him ignoring her, if he really didn’t want to see or hear her again, he at least has to have the balls to tell her in her face. Today she had a quiet day, she took her car and drove up to Misha’s house, he wasn’t home, but she had time. Y/N waited at the front door, she could see his car parked outside on the driveway, so he wasn’t far away.

Misha returned all sweaty from his run, being surprised when he saw Y/N sitting on the steps. “What are you doing here?” He asked out of breath. “Well, seems like my best friend is hiding from me, though I come and find him.” She answered trying to sound happy. “I don’t think I’m the one hiding things.” He said walking inside. “What do you mean?” Y/N followed. “Checked TMZ yet?” He asked while handing her his phone with the article. “Seriously Mish? Is that why you have been avoiding me? First off, Karl is a friend, a good one trying to lift me up when you were acting all weird.” Y/N said, “And second how could I have been able to explain this or keep you up to date if you don’t answer your phone?! And since when do you believe TMZ?”

“I am so sorry Y/N, I feel like an idiot.” Misha said when he saw that Y/N’s reaction was honest, “Well, you should.” Y/N answered trying not to smile. “You were jealous, weren’t you?” He didn’t answer that question. “I’m sweaty, that’s what I am. And in about 15 minutes will West and Maison be here from school, and I still haven't showered or prepared food yet.” Y/N nodded. “Go take a shower, I’ll prepare a snack for them.” She took the towel slapping his ass with it playfully.

After the shower Misha came down in his sweatpants and t-shirt, hearing his kids arrive, they were thrilled to see her again. “Your dad is taking a shower, are pancakes ok?” Of course, he didn’t think they would say no to that! “So how was your day?” Y/N asked not noticing Misha was looking at them in the kitchen. Maison wanted to help Y/N, while West was telling her about his day. Like a pro Y/N multitasked her way through baking, listening and watching Maison not getting burned. It felt like a dream to him. Maybe she does belong here with us.

After a while Y/N noticed Misha watching, she winked at him which brought him back to earth. “Pancakes?” She asked while he greeted his kids who were already sitting at the table. After dinner Y/N helped with the dishes while the kids were doing their homework. “Well, I better get going.” She said while folding the towel. Before Misha could change his mind, he pulled her into a hug. “Thank you for today, I’m glad we talked.” Y/N wrapped her arms around him, answering his affection. “Thanks for listening to me.” Misha let go “You know, you don’t have to leave.” Y/N looked at him not fully understanding what he meant. “The kids need to get to bed soon, but maybe, if you like, we can watch a movie together like old times?” “I would love that.”

All four of them watched a show the kids loved to watch, and even though Maison wanted to act like a big grown girl around her father, she asked Y/N to cuddle on the couch. Misha noticed how his little girl placed her head on Y/N’s lap while she moved her fingers through Maison’s hair and still be focussed on the screen. Misha didn’t want to move his kids, but it was way past bedtime. “Come on guys, time to go to bed.” With a little whining they left, West gave Y/N a good night hug before following his dad up the stairs. “Good night, buddy.” He heard her say.

“Dad, I like it when Y/N is here.” West told him while he tucked him in. “She makes you happy. Misha smiled at his son not knowing how to react. Before he went down, he dropped by his daughter's room. “All set? Ready to go to bed?” She hummed agreeing. He kissed her good night and went down trying not to rush himself. “Oh, great your back.” Y/N said while walking out of the kitchen, holding a bowl of popcorn. “What movie were you thinking about?” “Comedy?” he asked her approval before taking his seat next to her. “Great!”

While watching the movie Misha noticed Y/N curling up against him and shiver. “Cold?” he asked her, “Yeah, actually a little.” “Wait.” he paused the movie “Let me grab a blanked.” throwing it over them. Not long after he noticed Y/N’s head lowering on his shoulder, she fell asleep. He moved his arm so that her head would rest on his chest. Y/N woke up startled.” Oh my god Mish, I’m so sorry.” She said embarrassed. “Come here.” He still pulled her in close, kissing the temple of her head, moving his hand over her shoulder and arm. His touch felt good, soft yet strong, but most of all safe. Y/N could hear his heart beating faster, she looked up at him locking eyes with his soft blue gaze. Slowly Misha closed the space between them, holding her cheek with one hand, his lips finding hers. He gave them a soft peck, looking for any hesitation from her. Y/N’s eyes had this little glister in them. She kissed him back with the same softness, she smiled moving a little closer, placing her head back on to his chest, so that they both sat comfortably watching the movie. The last thing she wants was to rush things, scaring Misha away again.

Y/N felt Misha’s hand slip under the blanket, stroking her side and hip, his thumb accidently touching the side of her breast a few times. She looked up at him, it was clearly not his intention, he was still focussed on the tv. But little did he know that those small touches made her burn up. All she wanted was more of his hands over her, kissing those perfect lips. So, to control herself she buried her face a little more in his shirt, letting out a deep breath. Misha noticed her hand clenching the fabric of his shirt, it took him a second to realise what he was doing, so he held his hand still. But hearing her deep breaths turned him more on than he would have thought.

He couldn’t focus anymore, he started to daydream about her moans if he would actually touch her. So, he became a little bolder and stroke the side of her breast again, this time watching her reaction while kissing her head. Y/N looked up again to see his blue eyes darkened this time with lust. He kissed her lips with more passion, his tongue asking permission to enter her mouth. Her tongue following his. And when she pulled back for air, he lifted her on his lap. Her body on his, her knees straddling him but still covered under the warmth of the blanked. His hands moved to her back crawling under her shirt meeting her soft skin.

Her hands lingered on his shoulders, moving one slowly up his neck into his hair, without losing touch of the kisses they shared. Misha’s hand moved down to her bottom, kneading over her jeans making her whimper silently. His lips found their way to her neck, Y/N tilted her head giving him all the space to kiss and softly nip. Misha felt like a teen again, one who was so full of hormones and love drunk making out with his girl in the back of his car. But fully aware he was at home, giving in to the pleasures he wanted to taste all those months ago. And it felt good, even the smallest touch.

Y/N felt his erection growing and even though she was desperately trying not to move to fast, to wait for his lead she couldn’t help but grind against his hips, she wanted more friction. Misha growled against her ear holding her hips, pushing her closer asking her with his touch to do it again. So, she did, Y/N started to move slowly, both could hear their breaths getting heavier, filling the room with soft moans that were silenced with their kisses. Misha’s hands moved up over her thighs to her shirt, pulling it over her head, leaving his hands on her breast, kneading softly. He looked at her through his lashed while he kissed them all over, before his hand undid her bra. He looked at her like a man possessed, his lips and tongue found her hardened nipple, toying her with his other hand still kneading her right breast.

“Oh Mish....” She moaned holding his head, her fingers twisted in his hair. Y/N moved her hand down over his body, moving it in between them, finding his erection palming it over his trainers. Misha let go of her breast while he moaned against her. “Fuck...” He breathed out. Y/N let herself slip in between his legs, pulling his pants and underwear down. Her hands moved back up over his thighs, wrapping her hand around the shaft pumping slow, while her lips left kisses around his pelvis. Making him moan and growl her name, wanting to feel more of her. Y/N first kissed the tip of his dick, tasting his precum on her lips. She slowly lowered her head over him licking the tip. Misha’s breath hitched feeling her warm lips working their way down.

After she made him moan her name more than a few times she got up. Undressed in front of him, she would see the fire in his eyes burn. Knowing that if he wasn’t so turned on, he would feel embarrassed to stare at her, but his eyes took in every inch of her body while taking of his own shirt. Their naked bodies found each other again, Y/N again straddling his hips, but before she could lower herself on him, he stroked his hands between her thighs, feeling her wetness on her upper thigh close to her slit. He hummed delighted to know he cost it. His fingers toying her, making her head fall back, he entered her, first one finger then two slowly pumping, curling to find that one spot that would drive her crazy, she couldn’t help but to move her hips with him in rhythm, making him touch take soft spot inside her. “Oh Misha... although this feels.... Oh, so good... I need... More.” She managed to say between moans and breaths.

Misha let go of her, Y/N grinded against him a few more times, making sure his dick was coated before entering her. He lined himself up against her, locking eyes. He wanted to see her face while he bottomed out. “So beautiful.” He said while watching her expression. Kissing her collarbone while she slowly started to move up and down. She placed her hands behind him on the couch while his hands were guiding her, kneading the flesh of her bottom. Their lips not leaving each other's. The air was filled with moans and the sound of their bodies moving together.

Misha noticed the coil in his stomach building, he turned her around, and placed her on her back. Hovering above her naked body, taking her wrists in his hand moving them above her head. Kissing her neck again before re-entering her soaking core. Y/N could feel his trusts getting harder, stroking along that one spot inside. Not long after she started to tighten around his dick, moaning and whining his name is his ear, trying to keep quiet, unable to hold him close to her. Misha thrusted through her orgasm trying to make it last as long as possible. But he felt his own coming up again faster than anticipated he came inside her with one last thrust.

Misha lifted himself a little, letting go of her wrists, but still hovering over her. Softy and passioned kissing her lips before locking eyes with her. Neither said a word but enjoyed each other’s touch and company. “Mish... as much as I love cuddling with you. I really need to use the bathroom now.” Y/N said a little embarrassed. “Oh yeah sure, you know where it is right?” Y/N got quickly up put on her panties and a shirt to refresh herself, when she came back Misha had already put on his pants. He was folding the blanket. “I was thinking we best head upstairs, the bed lays better.” He said while walking up to her giving Y/N a kiss. She hummed “Well and I don’t want to fall asleep here and getting waked by the kids in the morning... seeing me half naked.” She laughed

Once in bed Misha held Y/N in his arms. “Please tell me you won’t regret this.” Y/N asked him, hoping this was the start of something and not a one-time thing. “I’ve been thinking about you, us for so long now, letting you close to me, was a calculated move.” He kissed her head letting out a chuckle. “But I had no idea it would get so hot and heavy so quick.” They both started laughing trying to stay quiet, not to wake the kids. “But no, I won’t regret this.”

“Good because I’m not planning on letting you run off again.” She said.

If you liked this, please check out my masterlist for other stories.

#fanfic #fluff #smut #spn #supernatural #misha collins #spn smut #spnedit #lovers #y/n #x reader #jensen ackles #karl urban #the boys amazon

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