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praisethesuuun · 1 year

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Hello, I’d like to request for Ares x reader.

The plot is: they have many fhildren. And one day, a random god publicly humiliated him then the reader and the children stood up for him.

I apologize if I request too much or I’ve broken any of the written rules.

this was so funny to write! I hope you like just as much as I love it💞

Ares x reader: what a wonderful family

Type: fluff

Warnings: swearing, mention of blood

You were running around from all Olympus. You thought your heart was about to explode and Hermes, who was beside you, was trying his best to make you feel at ease with everything that was going on. He also offered to carry your son Deimos in his arms, while you had the firstborn Phobos on your shoulders.

The fact is, your husband Ares can't stay away from trouble: every now and then, someone tried to make fun of him or take away his title of god of war; you and Hercules would always stand up for him. But now you had the kids and Ares was very protective of them, so much that they could barely escape his temple. Sadly, they don't have a good reputation due to their chaotic, sometimes violent nature, and your husband didn't want them to get in serious trouble.

"Mommy, let's hurry!"

"We can do it, uncle Hermes!"

They shouted, a determined expression on their chubby faces. Their father loved them, just like every member of the family (minus Poseidon, he hates kids) who knew them. They reminded you so much of Ares...

Deimos and Phobos looks so scary, yet their heart is full of compassion and love. "We're almost there, I'm going ahead, see you there, Y/N" said Hermes, accelerating. Deimos held on even stronger, a little fear ready to demoralize him, then he remembered his father's words: "Remember, kid! A true warrior is never scared, he always goes forward with his head held high"

And so, he did just that. Phobos, being slightly older than him, ended up to be the calmer in the group. Kissing the shoulder of his mom and hugging her from behind, he thought he could improve the situation this way. But, in reality, he knew what the lower gods thought of Ares, so he set himself a goal: to become the strongest god of Olympus to condemn anyone who dared tarnish his family name. Now his father was in trouble and the one who were picking on him were going to suffer.

On the other hand, you were mad. Ares' kind nature was the thing that most attracted you to him; you will never forget the way his sweet eyes looked at you on your wedding day, that intense blue brought dreams, hopes and ambition. "Beautiful" you thought, ready to begin a new life with your dear. Of course, everything good comes with consequences: Ares' kindness keeps him from harming others, no matter how cruel they are to him. You admire him for this, so since you love him, if he's the good cop it means you'll be the bad one.

You're not scared to intimidate or kill whoever dared to do something as stupid as insulting the family of the god of war. "Let's go get daddy" you shouted to your son with a grin. Oh, fun was about to start.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Ares needed to stay calm. He couldn't fight back, he had to be stronger than whoever was provoking him, but it was just so hard! Being a high-ranking god was like a doom to Ares: he couldn't mess with lesser gods like that, if he paid attention to them then the Olympian gods would scold him, tell him to not waste time any longer. And he couldn't afford it. He thanked Hercules, his wife and his brother for understanding the situation and coming to save him every time, yet there was a small voice in his head calling him "Weak!" everytime something like this happened.

"Dear Y/N...I wish you were here..." he said with his head lowered, watching the ground and ignoring the small crowd that had formed around him. And now you wonder: why didn't he just go away? Because according to him that was all a skit orchestrated by Zeus to test him. His father was strict, he demanded a lot from his fighters and Ares liked to think that this was a tough test to overcome, so he stayed still, doing nothing if not praying for someone to come and stop his suffering. "What the hell is happening here?"

Ares turned around to that familiar voice. "Diomede, go away" said the god of war to his son, begging him to leave, his voice louder than ever and full of authority. The last thing that should have happened was to get his children involved in this story, he was their father and he just had to protect them. "Are we already there, big brother?"

"ARMONIA?"

Now Ares was surely getting an heart attack. She was the youngest out of his family and the only daughter he's ever had; his panic increased dramatically. The god stood up, reaching for the children before a rock hit him on the head, causing him to bleed slightly. "Shit" he whispered, trying not to be heard by Armonia, she was still a child after all. "How dare you, dickhead" talked Diomede suddenly, a dark aura surrounding his slim figure. The eyes of the boy became full of rage, like the ones of a Cerberus ready to kill.

Ares' blood became as cold as ice and a shiver hit their back violently when he saw Diomedes take the stone in his hand to throw it back to the sender. The small weapon it was pulled so fast that it sliced through the air in an inhuman speed, hitting the lower god right in the nose. The latter fell to the floor, his nose reduced to pulp and his eyes rolled back in pain. Ares watched in disbelief, torn between worrying about the consequences or praising his son's strength. He chose the second. "Nice throw, champ! Give me a five" he said smiling, a new willingness to fight ready to get the better of other emotions. "Honey! You alright? You're bleeding..."

"Y/N?" he asked looking at his beautiful wife. His eyes filled with joy and Ares thought he might burst into tears at any moment. He wasted no time and ran to embrace you, while you reciprocated the grip, your smaller figure completely hidden in the other's arms. "I'm here" you talked in a sweet and motherly way, reassuring your dear. "Hi, dad" said Phobos after a few seconds of silent. "Hey, buddy"

"Don't worry, honey. We got this..." you did a little pause before your voice became as loud and threatening as a thunder "...LET'S FIGHT!"

And the fight began as soon as Phobos kicked right in the balls of an opponent. Armonia and Diomede started throwing as many rocks as possible, their aim unerring after years of training with their father. The god of war never felt more proud when he saw how much his family loved him: the way they were ready to stand up for him when no one wanted to do that, he felt real joy.

On the other hand, you were hyping up your squad of hurricanes, hitting someone every now and then. Your heart bursted as Ares decided to join the fray too, smiling more than ever and ready to stand by your side. You couldn't help but bursting out laughing thanks to the adrenaline of the moment. The battlefield became a majestic ballroom solo, where you and your husband were the only ones dancing, while the screams and the cracking of bones were the melody to your bloody dance.

But suddenly, a terrible doubt came to Ares. He stopped to count his children. "One, two, three...dear?"

"Yes?"

"Where's Deimos?"

You stopped too. You watched each other for just over a second, confused as hell. Then you talked: "He was with Hermes, he probably decided to take him somewhere safe"

"Yeah, probably"

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

In the meantime, right on the roof of the square where the brawl was taking place, Hermes sighed looking defeated. "I owe you big money, little one" he said, still looking down. Deimos laughed, counting the money he was holding. "Told you he was going to join the fight, don't understimate my father! Or you'll end up like them" he said pointing to a few biodies lying on the ground. "I would never, little lord"

And then, they watched the fight again, a sense of pride in their hearts. Ares might not stand up for his ideals, but his family would always be ready to defend him; and no matter how many enemies they had to fight, they would stick together, no matter what.

#record of ragnarok headcanons #record of ragnarok #ror x reader #ror x you #ror ares #record of ragnarok ares #shumatsu no valkyrie #shuumatsu no valkyrie x reader #ror imagines #snv x reader #snv x you #snv x y/n #snv ares #request rules #request

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luxthestrange · 2 years

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RoR Incorrect quotes#2

Ares:Over here, old friend. In case you haven't noticed, you've fallen right into my trap

Heracles:You can't trap justice! It's an idea! A belief!

Ares: Well, even the most heartfelt belief can be corroded over time!

Heracles: Justice is a non-corrosive metal!

Ares: But metals can be melted by the heat of revahnge!

Heracles: It's "revenge", and it's best served cold!

Ares: But it could be easily reheated, in the microwave of evil!

Heracles: Well, I think your warranty is about to expire!

Ares: Maybe I've got an extended warranty!

Heracles: Warranties are invalid if you don't use the product for its intended purpose!

Y/n*groans* Girls, girls! You're both pretty! Can I go home now?

Adam better not find out about these two coming after you, his precious child

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romanttia · 11 months

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Matching icon for u and the fam

Og image is here 🔗

#record of ragnarok #shuumatsu no valkyrie #record of ragnarok ares #record of ragnarok hermes #record of ragnarok heracles #record of ragnarok zeus #record of ragnarok icon #shuumatsu no valkyrie icon

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dreamcatcheresss · 5 months

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Am I the only one who thinks that "pretty" Squidward was the inspiration for Ares' (Record of Ragnarok) look?

#shuumatsu no valkyrie ares #record of ragnarok ares #ror ares #snv ares #ares #squidward #spongebob squarepants

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riseofamoonycake · 9 months

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Dreams of Days, Whispers of Nights ☀️🌕 Afternoon ⁓ Fire

🔥Characters: Ares; Kojiro Sasaki

🔥Pairing: Ares x Priestess!reader

🔥Warnings: mention of death, hurt/comfort

🔥

Ares

Ares knows he shouldn’t do it, and that Death is mourning beside him.

It isn’t a joke of the shadows dancing on the walls, thrown and immediately captured by the sacred flames that move in circles in the braziers: his hands tremble slightly as they caress your face and you, instead of running away from him and saving yourself, keep them pressed firmly on your cheeks and give him even more tenderness.

A splendid afternoon envelops the city of Rome: it is a winter day that already smells of spring, far too warm and calm, which gets dark as soon as it crosses the threshold of this tall, austere and cold temple where girls almost never get what they hope for and dream of; and just like that time, centuries before, he couldn’t resist the sweet smile and bright eyes of those who found themselves there in spite of him. Different name, different figure: same heart, and that burning feeling that condemns those who should forget desires, impulses and carnal caresses. And he… he can’t take it anymore. And so do you.

«You are shaking from head to toe, my lord. What is happening?» Your hands are delicate as they deprive the god of the helmet and immediately rest on his cheeks, caress his blond hair or trace the shape of his eyes; Ares wants to speak and ask you to stop, he doesn’t care if he is the one to beg and pray if that means saving you… but he can’t open his mouth, the lips glued together and the tongue tied by that (e/c) gaze that venerates every part of him, running over his figure with immense devotion. You are not stupid at all, you know what he is thinking: you understand that he is seeing Rhea Silvia🌼 in you, and everything that happened when that unfortunate girl listened to love and didn’t forget that she was human.

«We can’t go on…» Ares murmurs to you, the powerful Lord of War who has given meaning to your existence, while the more he would like to break away from you the more he leans towards your face, and in the end it is he who gives the kiss ― the first of many, as always.

You hesitate to hold him, you wonder if you have the right to; but in the end you cuddle yourself in his arms as soon as he opens them and, once you hug him, he presses you to his chest and suffocates impotence and fear between his teeth, unable to overcome the feeling that binds both of you. Amor Vincit Omnia, says a law that everyone, gods and men, knows; and you too must bow to its command. «What you fear will not happen, my lord. You don’t need to worry for me… I am and will always be here. I am the one you lost and who came back to love you again.»

Ares closes his eyes at the sound of your words and keeps himself silent, observing the sacred fire that continues to rumble merrily a few steps away from you, remaining vigilant in your place but slowly melting as your caresses touch all his sensibilities. As you strip off your clothes and drop every veil and obstacle to the ground, he wonders if he should listen to you; and even if only for a moment, an afternoon or a whole night, he finds himself hoping for a long, eternal spring.

Kojiro Sasaki

«I’d recognize that look in a thousand.»

You can’t help it: as soon as the man smiles at you, you do the same. It comes naturally to you: perhaps due to his good and humble nature, his eyes that lit up as soon as he noticed you and stared at you with an incredulous air, overwhelming like a blaze of heat, or due to all that he has left behind, and that you have collected and welcomed as the most precious and living of treasures. Nothing can be hidden from him: you don’t even have to open your mouth to introduce yourself, because he has already understood who you are and has stopped, waiting for you to join him.

Like a wave, the memory of long summer and winter afternoons spent listening to what was left of his voice ― filtered and woven from that of other people but still close to you ― reaches and envelops you in an embrace: and the years are reduced to little more than a breath while the memories arrive and there are many, countless things to say and tell, reveal and remember together in a day that seems so similar to the others, and instead is completely different. And the fact that Kojiro Sasaki, the man standing before you, killed a god a few hours ago is only the least important detail of a much bigger story. «You must be wrong, because my gaze is ordinary», you immediately reply without really thinking about it, just to take another instant of time: it seems that you have stopped breathing, and that your body will never respond to a command again. How many times have you dreamed of this moment or have you even just named it, thought about it and, in that part of you where meaningless worries await, feared it? And yet, if only you had known of seeing him descend into the Ragnarok’s arena and face a deity, challenging the whole world with his title of “History’s Strongest Loser”... if only you had imagined watching him fight for you all with the danger of losing him forever at any moment, and without him even knowing of your existence, what would you have done?

But what happened happened, and it couldn’t have been otherwise: and now his gaze is here with you, it welcomes and cradles you, recognizes you with a calmness and love that brings you to tears. You have never asked for anything but this, and finally your wish has come true.

«Let’s say so, if you want to… however, those eyes are too similar to mine. Even if yours are nicer.» A pause, then Kojiro chuckles and runs a hand through his hair as he narrows the eyes and his smile becomes even wider and warmer. «Aaaaah, I would have thought of everything, except to meet the most graceful and wonderful of women on this very day. I could not have asked for a better gift.»

You take one step and another, faster and faster, and you can no longer control your tears as you finally cover the short distance that separates you from each other, open your arms wide and, with all the strength you have inherited from him, embrace the man you have dreamed of meeting since you were a child, the hero of an entire existence and even beyond, protector of humanity. «Finally we met… dad!»

🌼 Rhea Silvia: Mythical mother of Romulus and Remus (the former is the founder of the city of Rome). She was a vestal, a priestess of the Goddess of Fire Vesta, and according to the rules of the priesthood she had to remain chaste for thirty years; however Ares/Mars fell in love with her and made her pregnant with the twins, and for this the girl was buried alive, according to the punishment that was due to the vestal who had sexual relations with someone or who let the sacred fire of the goddess go out, which had to be kept always lit.

#record of ragnarok #shuumatsu no valkyrie #ror #snv #snv kojiro #ror kojiro sasaki #ror kojiro #record of ragnarok kojiro #sasaki kojiro #Shuumatsu no valkyrie Kojiro #shuumatsu no valkyrie ares #snv ares #ror ares #record of ragnarok ares #Ares

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iamfandomtrashandimproud · 2 years

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Ares: you're pretty and you're smart, and you're ignoring me so you're obviously my type.

Aphrodite: I'm sorry, what where you saying?

Ares: *swooning* perfect

#record of ragnarok #ror Aphrodite #ror ares #record of ragnarok Aphrodite #record of ragnarok ares #ares x aphrodite #source: crazy ex girlfriend

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mizz-sea-nymph · 1 year

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*whistles innocently 😗 *

#record of ragnarok #shuumatsu no valkyrie #ror #snv #ror ares #snv ares #record of ragnarok ares #edit #my stuff #I’m not funny

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rukia-writes · 2 years

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Me:

#he’s so cute 🥰#I love you 💕#my gif #༼ つ ◕◡◕ ༽つ adorable king #record of ragnarok ares

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kanroji-san · 5 months

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Apollo:*kisses Y/n on the cheek*

Y/n:*laughs at Ares's dumbfounded expression*

Ares:*his brain stopped loading*

Hermes: ...

Hermes: I'm aware that it is only a friendly gesture between you and Apollo, but I couldn't still get used to it.

Y/n: You don't have to. We love misunderstandings.

Y/n&Apollo: *both of them smirking*

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aresfanclub · 2 months

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The grip-

#snv ares #record of ragnarok ares #shuumatsu no valkirye #shuumatsu no walkure #shuumatsu no valkyrie #record of ragnorak #ror ares #snv #ror

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palesublimeduck · 8 months

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This is SO Ares coded

#record of ragnarok #shuumatsu no valkyrie #snv #ror #ror memes #snv memes #ror headcanons #snv headcanons #shuumatsu no walkure #ares #ares shuumatsu no valkyrie #ares record of ragnarok #record of ragnarok ares #shuumatsu no valkyrie ares #ror ares #ares ror #ares snv #snv ares #終末のワルキューレ

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praisethesuuun · 1 year

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Hello, can I request for hercules and reader. The plot is she catches him cheating on her and by doing so, he’s broken her heart. But when he tries to win her back, she’s already happily married to Ares.

This was such a challenge, hope you like it tho❤️

Cheater!Hercules x reader x Ares

Type: angst, but fluff in the end

Warnings: swearing, a bit of violence, mention of blood, mention of sex

The day was going far too well for your liking, and that means only one thing: something was horribly wrong. You woke up next to your significant other, Hercules, already awake and smiling, lighting up the room like the summer sun. His eyes full of life reflected the happiness that had invaded you instantly, while you moved closer to him kissing his soft lips. Everything Hercules did was flawless, his good and kind heart was infallible and you couldn't help but fall in love with him, regardless his human origin. From the window of your temple you could already see the clear cloudless sky of heaven, there was no sign of wind if not a soft cool breeze.

"Good morning, my love" you said, feeling his muscle flex under the touch of your fingers. Hercules he sighed as you started tracing every inch of his skin, watching you aroused and bringing his arms around your hips. "Morning...my goddess"

You decide to get up after a few minutes often to laze between the white covers of your bed, the chill air of the room struck your bare skin like the precise slash of a blade, while your lover was dressing up. The usual routine: you go about your duties as goddess of weapons, while Hercules goes to Zeus to leave for a new endeavour.

"I better get going, Zeus is gonna be so mad at me..." Hercules spoke with his head down as he adjusted his belt. "Then you better get going" you answered trying to hold him in your arms, but without success, since he had already left without looking you in the eyes. Weird, it was just weird, but you decided to ignore it, thinking it was simple anxiety about the fight ahead.

Passing an hand between your hair, you decide to leave your temple, saying goodbye to your handmaids on your way to one of the many arenas. As the goddess of weapons, your job was to inspire blacksmiths and to guide the hand of bold knights who pray to you with constancy, asking for victory in battle and the protection of an angel.

Precisely for this reason, your path often collides with that of the god Ares, your boyfriend's best friend, gentle like him, but with a head as hard as the helmet he wears.

Your work was important to you and your strength had earned you the respect of many deities, who saw you as a guide, a shoulder to lean on. And you loved every second of that, the role of hero suited you just as a sword slipped into its scabbard. Simply perfect.

"Lady Y/N, is good to see you here"

"It's where we work, Ares"

"Y-yeah, sorry"

As always, the smell of dirt filled your nostrils as you prepared to side with your favorite faction; while Ares joined the opposing faction. You two always did this: you never took the same side, but you liked to create some healthy competition between you, stimulating your passion for war and strengthening your bond. You decided to look into each other's eyes, the tension palpable as you waited for one of the two knights you were assisting to dare to make the first move. Your heart filled with a burning fire ready to explode inside you, Ares was gasping with anticipation and both of you could do nothing but scream as you heard the battle cry. You set out on a wild ride, even outpacing the horses, then clashing your weapons in a hypnotic dance. "Let's go!" said Ares smiling and ready to strike another blow, that you parried without problems.

Your fight lasted until there was only one fighter left standing on the battlefield...and it was yours. Both of your breaths were heavy, your armor was full of small scratches, while Ares' scarlet cloak was almost torn to shreds. You were the first to decide to break that silence: "That was good"

"Indeed" said the other, adjusting his blond curl and offering you his hand to return to Olympus; you grabbed it without a second thought, leaving that bloodbath to go home.

The only thought on your mind was to be able to see Hercules again: in reality, all the tension you vented with the sword was equivalent to the fear of losing your loved one, always ready to risk his life. "Are you ok?" asked you Ares, without leaving your side and with worry in his blue eyes. Sometimes, you wondered how such kind eyes could belong to a god of war.

You waited a few seconds before answering, then you talked: "I'm just worried about Hercules, he left this morning for a dangerous quest. I know he's strong, but..."

"Wait"

"Mh?"

"Are you sure?"

Now you were panicking. Your heart skipped a beat, the god looked at you with even more confusion than before, then resumed his speech: "Zeus didn't call him to the palace today"

"What?" you said, with the mind totally turned off and with even more questions than before. "I'll go search for him"

"Yeah, I'm coming too"

And having said that, you both set off in search of the missing demigod. Your ambition died down after you finished checking everywhere, while your eyes were already filling with tears. "Let's try your temple!" Ares suggested, placing a hand on your back and drawing circles on it to calm you down. "Y-yeah, you're right, maybe he's already a-at home"

How could you imagine, how could you predict such a thing. Before you, was your world completely crumbling, all your dreams in smoke and hopes in flames. Hercules' apologies weren't enough to justify one of your handmaids underneath him, completely naked and with his cock thrust inside her. Your eyes were wide open and your mouth wide open, you didn't know what to say and how to react: that person who can be considered as noble as honest had just stabbed you in the back. Ares was still beside you, looking at his friend in anger and disappointment; he didn't say anything either. There were so many words to say, but all of them floated around the room unspoken. Nobody dared to do it. Your servant began to get up slowly, covering her bare parts with a sheet and proceeding towards the door, her gaze lowered in shame at not meeting that of her mistress. Anger hit you right after. Your foot moved on its own, dropping her like a sack of potatoes, then you walked towards Hercules. "Hear me out, ple-"

He didn't even have time to finish the sentence, that your hand in contact with his cheek snatched the poor apologies from his mouth. "Out. Go out"

Hercules blanched, suddenly stiffened and threw himself out the door without thinking about covering himself: he thought only of disappearing and didn't even bother to pick up his new lover, which was forced to crawl away.

You and Ares were the only ones left in the room. The god of war didn't know what to do, yet his mind lit up as he saw your knees give out and your sobs slowly get louder and louder. All the anger was pouring out of your eyes, while your lip was bleeding from the force with which you were biting it. Ares threw himself on you, holding you tightly and kissing your forehead softly. "Everything will work out" he kept repeating like a broken record, while rocking you gently, without letting go for a single second. On the other hand, your honor had been scarred for life, just like the trust you had in your asshole ex-lover. You wanted to throw stones at fate, break the wings of all the angels still flying, but you weren't like that and now you should have only thought about recovering. Ares would have stood by you, crumbling every shred of respect he had for Hercules.

Time passed and many things changed: you had taken your life back in hand, thanks to the support of your friends and your fortitude; fortunately, the same could not be said for Hercules, who had fallen into a vortex of sadness and guilt. Not a day went by that his mind wasn't occupied by you, your laughter, your love and what he had lost. He couldn't even remember why he'd done you such a wrong, he'd completely forgotten and felt like a piece of shit for doing it. The ghost of your touch haunted him day and night, driving him mad even in his dreams; Hercules had lost the support of the deities he knew as soon as word got out, becoming a laughingstock to all who loved you. Until one day, he decided to put an end to his torments, if not completely mend the tear that was between you. He took his things, got ready, observing his deep dark circles for a few too many seconds, accompanied by a dull and melancholy look. He left his house, heading towards your beautiful temple, stomping the road he used to take with you. He didn't even have time to get to the gardens surrounding your little kingdom, that a familiar voice invaded his ears instantly. "Come here, little boy!"

"Ares?" thought the redhead, looking around. After a while he heard another voice, more melodious and ringing: "Listen to your father, Eagro!"

It was you, unmistakable. He began to follow your voices, his brain analyzing a thousand pieces of information per second as he thought back to what he had just overheard. He wandered behind the hedges for a while before coming to a clearing. Hercules didn't notice the beautiful flowers around it, but something else caught his eye: your figure was surrounded by a red cloak (very similar to that of Ares), while your husband was playing with a brat among the daisies. "I'll beat you, daddy!" "I'm sure you will, kiddo!"

Your smile was ethereal, much more sincere and beautiful than the one you wore when you were with him, it seemed more right. On one hand, he was angry with himself for throwing everything away: he could have been the one next to you, that could have been his son...

But on the other hand, he was happy to see you as brilliant as ever, accompanied by a better god than him. Ares would never have abandoned you, or betrayed or disappointed you; it was perfect. Hercules left silently, without looking back, his head filled with thoughts of a life never lived.

#record of ragnarok #shuumatsu no valkyrie x reader #ror x reader #ror x you #ror x y/n #record of ragnarok ares #record of ragnarok headcanons #record of ragnarok heracles #snv x you #snv x reader #snv x y/n #snv ares #snv heracles

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luxthestrange · 4 months

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RoR Incorrect quotes#160 BAGELS!!!

Imagen before the fight that was supposed to be Shiva bs Adam...turned into Zeus vs Adam...someone got to Zeus first and...killed him, So now Hera and the rest of the Greek pantheon along with Adam's family after being suspected of...murdering him are brought to tell the news

Hermes: Zeus is dead...

Adam: Say what now?...

Hera: Wait, my husband is dead?*Frowns and raises her brow*

Hermes: Yeah, Uncle Hades's office just notified us...

Y/n*Raises hand*...Um

The Gods look at the secret member...or rather recently integrated member of Adam's family, not sure what to expect from such a small frail-looking human...Hera allowing you to speak, wanting to hear your input curious about what you have in mind

Y/n: No way that's true, As Zeus says when he sees deodorant,

"I'm not buying it"

Hera*Letting out involuntary laugh*...HA-HA!-*Coughs seeing her son and others looking at her*

After Everyone saw the king of gods in his special tomb

Y/n*Parading through the halls with a bag of pastries and bagels* Ding, dong, the king of sexual assault is dead. Bagels for everyone!

Cain: So I guess you believe it now?

Y/n: Yep, Wanna see the selfies I took?

Cain: Actually, yes~

Y/n: I'll share the album with you!~

Heracles*Coming to you and your brother Cain, tearful* Oh, my God!, I just heard about Father! he was so young!

Y/n: For a redwood tree...Uh, I don't understand, what's going on, Why are you crying?

Heracles: Somebody is dead, I feel sad

Y/n: Well, I know just the thing to cheer you up! ZEUS is dead! Bagel!Bagel!Bagel!*Throwing bagels to every person, who happily catches them and eats it...hell some gods passed by you are also happy*

Turns out...You were selected instead of Hera or any of his children to give a speech to speak highly of him...You were of course brought by Heracles to the Greek pantheon room...

Heracles: All you have to do is say a few nice comments during the memorial!

Y/n: As a Celestial said when he tried to sneak past the gates into the afterlife:

"It ain't happening, honey."

Hera*Holding her sides letting out the biggest laugh in the room*HAHAHAHA!

RIP captain dad holt/Andre Keith Braugher...you will be missed...

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nameless-flame · 6 months

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RoR gods reactions to you calling Poseidon a 💅Drama Queen💅

RoR and fem!Reader crack below the cut

Seated along the round table, various prominent figures of each pantheon waited, some more patiently than others, for the mortal standing before them to reveal what she had summoned them for.

[Name] cleared her throat, putting an end to the idle chatter that had previously filled the walls of the old-fashioned conference room. "I have called you to this meeting to discuss a matter of utmost importance."

Shiva rolled his neck, allowing his eyes to freely wander between the faces of the gods – all deemed to be high figures in their respective pantheon – some even belonging to the same one. And yet, there was one man missing.

Leaning his chair back, the God of Destruction balanced himself with two hands holding onto the edge of the table, whilst his remaining two rested behind his head. "Where's that sea deity?"

Shooting a glare in Shiva’s direction, [Name] resumed talking. “If you had not so rudely interrupted me you would have known why.”

The blue man merely rolled his eyes. He had long before grown used to her more… unmannerly way of addressing them. Her disrespectful attitude had at first irked him, and many other deities, but eventually whatever ill feelings they initially harboured toward her soon evolved into intrigue, and later friendship. Some even more than that.

Seeing how the god had not argued back, the human continued. "As for why Sea Boy isn’t here with us today, I didn’t invite him.”

Hades’ brows flickered and he paused his chess match with Zeus. “I presume this meeting concerns my brother?”

[Name] gave the God of the Underworld a curt nod. “I’ll just get straight to the point so to not further waste our time. Can we all come to common agreement that Poseidon is the biggest drama queen in history?"

Hades didn’t know what was more worrisome; her odd exclaim, or the fact that no one had so much as reacted to it. Have things like this truly become the norm?

Most eyes darted to Apollo, and then lingered there, before returning to her, obviously questioning her statement. However, [Name] did not yield under their distrustful stares but continued speaking without any less conviction. "Yes, sure. Some might argue that the twink has some dramatic traits as well."

Apollo craned his neck in her direction, no longer staring in the reflection of his hand mirror. "Why are we listening to her, again?"

“Because they’d rather be here than at one more of your lame parties.” Apollo furrowed his brows, but ultimately decided to just massage the tense muscles of his temples, not desiring to start a fruitless dispute with her.

“But we are not here to talk about Apollo, but Poseidon – the biggest drama queen I have ever encountered in my entire life.”

Beelzebub sighed, tapping his foot impatiently against the marble floor. He just wanted to return to his research. “How did you even come to such an irrational conclusion?”

Standing tall, [Name] placed her hands on her hips. “Irrational? Do you guys truly not see it?” Blank stares were shot in her direction, only Heracles and Ares had the decency to shake their heads.

“Well then, allow me to provide you with an example; If a fly were to land on that drama queen’s shoulder, he would not hesitate to drown all their villages, slaughter their children, and then feed their corpses to the nearest animal.”

Loki snickered, obviously finding some amusement in what he deemed to be an exaggerated story. [Name] ignored him and continued. “And then, to truly top it off, after exterminating an entire species he would just act as normal, as if his reaction was more than justifiable.”

“She does have a point,” the serene voice of Aphrodite spoke. “Poseidon’s reactions do tend to be quite… overbearing at times.”

Rosaline dragged a hand through her hair in hope that the motion would soothe her racing mind. “And I know this to be true because that fly is a metaphor for us humans. I literally bumped into him just the other day, and this bitch-”

A warning glare from Hades.

“This very fine gentleman acted like I gave him the bubonic plague.” Loki and Shiva broke into a fit of laughter. The Hindu god even toppled off his chair, but that didn’t seem to encourage him from continuously laughing his ass off.

[Name] rolled her eyes. “Yeah, yeah, continue howling all day long you buffoons, but I think I singlehandedly made him wish for a second Ragnarok.” This only made the duo double over, trying to choose between drying their tears or holding their stomachs. It was a good day for Shiva to have four arms.

Hermes, however, coaxed his brows. “Do you mean to tell us that you came in contact with Lord Poseidon without invoking his wrath?”

[Name] cocked her head to the side. “Didn’t I just tell you that he looked like he wanted to pierce me into a shish kebab?”

Hades moved his king one square forward on the chessboard, the slight click when the piece hit the wood gaining her attention. “That is not what he meant, my dear. If our brother is truly angry, he will not hesitate to kill whoever is around him. The fact that you are still alive indicates that he had no desire of ending your life.”

Odin nodded from the seat beside his son, who was staring out of the window, wishing for this conversation to come to an end.

"This!” [Name]’s sudden outburst caught the attention of everyone in the room, including the socially withdrawn God of Thunder. “This is what I mean when I call him dramatic! You have just grown used to his actions. Look, I don't mind his exaggerated reactions, but he needs a bit of variation.”

[Name] began pacing around the room, her back straight and chin held high, while holding a stick in her hand. Where did she even get that?

“Someone breathes the same air as me? Dead.” Everyone’s eyes widened.

She was imitating Poseidon.

“Someone accidentally steps on my foot? Dead. Someone has the audacity to look me straight in the eye? Dead.” She stopped and heaved a heavy sigh, “Like, come on. Try something new for once, please."

Zeus stroked his long beard. "Wait, let me get this straight. You mean to tell us that your problem with Poseidon is not his behaviour, but that it has grown old?"

[Name] slammed her hands against the table, making the glasses along the wine bottles on it shake with the sudden force. “Yes!”

“This meeting is over.” Hades declared, already walking away. It did not take long for the other deities to follow him, Loki and Shiva needing to crawl out from all their excessive laughing.

“Fine, go! But don’t come crying to me when you guys realize I was right!”

“We won’t,” cooed Zeus.

…

“Hades?”

“Yes, Zeus?”

The King of the Gods blinked, not believing his eyes. “Why is Poseidon drowning that entire meadow?”

Before the two deities stood their brother, sending wave after wave into a beautiful landscape of green hills and the most gorgeous of flowers.

Hades sighed, running a hand through his white hair. “To kill the flies.”

Zeus turned his head to his brother, already dreading his next answer. “Why?”

The King of the Underworld gulped, cursing that mortal for how correct she had been. “Because a fly had landed on his shoulder.”

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