Generally speaking, your parents often owe you a lot more than you're taught to believe. A lot of people are raised to believe that parents do not really owe you that much beyond food and shelter and that's not true. In fact, you can have parents who give you food, shelter, patience and kindness and STILL deserve more from them.

By being your parents, they've accepted a very special relationship and amount of responsibility for you. Do you know how many people I know whose parents have never genuinely apologized to them? How many people’s parents physically hurt them, how many people’s parents mock their insecurities, how many people’s parents don’t care for their children’s health, how many parents make their children (intentionally or otherwise) want to die? 

And so many people don’t give a fuck. We’re raised in cultures that more often than not treat us to respect our parents in spite of most anything while also teaching everyone that children don’t deserve shit. We’re raised in cultures that more often than not teach us to “respect our parents” in spite of most anything while also teaching everyone that children don’t really deserve shit. It varies but its so common that lots of people don’t even think twice about it. 

But children DO deserve more than they’re generally given. So much more! And so many things that are literally just abusive are considered normal parenting all around the world and that’s vile, especially considering children are the most severely affected by this and have no “societal power” to wield to put a stop to it beyond what they can scramble together through a combination of sheer determination, shock value, strength and fucking luck. 

Not to sound radical, but I think we owe children a fuck ton more than they’re being given now and I think people need to learn so much more about abuse and how that ties into the common underplaying of what we’re owed in parent/child relationships. 

sometimes i think about how my art teacher covered a wall in chalk board paint. i remember when i was just about to leave that school i drew a dragon on that wall. he told me time and time again that he'd always erase the wall so everyone could have a turn drawing something there. then came the time where i left a note on his desk on my last day, thanking him for being a positive figure in my life when my real parents were not. i told him they made me very sad, and for a short while, having him there encouraging me with everything i did was enough to make my life feel a little better. he was never my father, but it was still enough to make my heart hurt a little less when my actual father was cruel. he gave me warm coffee after afternoons where i'd been attacked by my best friend, he listened to my ideas, he helped nurture my passion for creating, he listened to my dreams and aspirations and told me i was going to make it, when nobody else had the gall to say that to me (i was struggling severely in high school, and i had no medication - very little people believed in me and thought i was a dead man walking). he was a good teacher, i think every teacher should be like him - especially for the kids who don't have good parents.

sometimes i think about me talking to someone who was just about to graduate from that same school, years and years and years later, and they told me about the pretty dragon that he refuses to erase from his chalk board wall. i didn't mean to ramble with this post, but to anyone who needs to remember this, people are kind. people are caring. and you will find someone who treats you with respect, compassion, and patience.

you will find people who remember you.

it's sooo fun tossing around this idea tho, cuz like, every response i've gotten has perfect reasoning for why they think splinter would target who he would target.

leo, because he's supposed to tell splinter everything. and because he's the one who introduced them all to april.

raph, because he's supposed to be more responsible and take care of his brothers- but instead he let them all do this dangerous shit.

mikey or donnie, because they're his least favorites so he'd have less qualms about hurting or "damaging" them

but ultimately i think the proper response is, obviously, everyone. just to varying degrees and in different ways. under the cut cuz this got long

this is because splinter isn't like a calm mastermind or anything, he's a pissy emotionally fucked up old man who's furious with his children and will lash out at them in whatever way he can justify, which is Most Ways. Raph would probably get the most physical violence (slaps/smacks, harder training, more physical labour, less food) since Splinter considers him more physically sturdy than his brothers.

Leo would get a lot of emotional manipulation and guilt tripping for having not only disobeyed his dad but actively hid it AND was the one who brought his brothers into it. Splinter would talk a lotta shit about how if Leo led his brothers like this once Splinter dies then they'd all get taken by the US GOVERNMENT and prolly tortured and raped and all that stuff. and it would be leo's fault.

leo would also have some sexual & physical abuse stuff going on but i feel like that goes without saying at this point !

Mikey would get double the punishments for "being annoying/contradictory/not paying attention" even when he's not actively trying to piss off Splinter. frankly just being around Mikey would prolly piss off Splinter at this point, since mikey has always been the least likely to follow orders, so his presence is a constant reminder of his failure to control his kids.

I also think Splinter would go through mikey's art supplies and destroy/throw out anything April gave Mikey (he gets the boys around and asks which things were given by April and sorts them into two piles and then breaks/destroys/smashes anything in the april pile once he's done)

And last but not least, Splinter would find Donnie's anxiety and visible fear insufferable. He'd probably mostly emotionally lash out at donnie for being visibly weak. but he might also give him tasks that are either way too difficult, or that donnie can't be expected to complete in a given time frame, or stuff that Donnie just frankly needs more information about (but splinter is NOT gonna give him that information cuz if he's so smart he can just figure it out) and then when Donnie fails splinter will use that as an excuse to degrade him even more cuz "this should be easy for a genius"

Content warning for graphic descriptions of child abuse, animal abuse, and torture.

Seven children and five dogs have been rescued from a south Edmonton home, where police allege they endured years of physical and emotional abuse and torture at the hands of three adults. “Without question, this is one of the most disturbing cases of child abuse that our child protection investigators have ever seen,” EPS child protection section Staff Sgt. Ryan Tebb said in a statement.

Continue Reading

Tagging @politicsofcanada @abpoli

hi this is kinna out of the blue and no one sent you an ask about this but today i gave myself my testosterone shot and i’ve been on T for two months and even though i haven’t had many changes yet for the first time in over a decade i’m feeling so much better about my body again. it took me until i was 34 years to transition despite knowing i wanted to since i was 19 because i live in the southern united states and they only NOW got informed consent in my state. i tried in my twenties and was put through the wringer, told my PDs or autism was making me “think” i was a man, i ended up in a domestic violence situation with a misogynist and transphobe i’m still recovering from, i had a child too, i went through drug addiction and alcohol abuse, i attempted suicide several times

AND i just wanted to spread the positivity to every trans person out there (trans men, women, nb people) that things DO GET BETTER! it makes me cry thinking about it and how i finally get to be the man, and father i always wanted to be and i am not an emotional person. if any other trans ppl no matter the age want HRT and feel like it’s never going to happen, don’t give up! keep fighting!! you won’t die this way! i don’t know how many times i imagined getting misgendered at my own funeral and dying known only as my assigned gender at birth.

keep going and stay strong and safe!!

I'm really sorry you've had to struggle through all that pain, bigotry and abuse - and it makes my day that now you're on T and feeling like it's all been worth the wait! ✊️

Story. Once

Previous | Next

[ID: 13 digitally sketched panels in b/w]

[Panel 1: The Skull, pupils ringed intensely as he says disbelievingly, "You think Becile (italics) liked me?"]

[Panel 2: The Skull hunches forward, his shoulders shaking, as he says, "(ellipses) Hahh (ellipses)" Dee leans forward from accross the table, her hands balled into fists, saying, "He didn't abandon you. Didn't put you in storage."]

[Panel 3: The Skull lowers his head and gives a strained smile as Dee continues from off panel, "Hare told me all about you: Right hand. Guard dog." Hare, looking terrified, waves his hand at his throat in a beheading/stop it motion, small text above him reading "oh jeez no stop." The Skull replies to Dee, "He did, huh?" Dee continues, "Ignoring me must have been easy. Thadeus--"]

[Panel 4: No image. Text in The Skull's font, reading, "He killed me, once."]

[Panel 5: The whole table of players, sitting silently.]

[Panel 6: The Skull smiles ruefully and points at the joint between his neck and his jaw on the right side. He says, "I hardly remember it. Just being in the workshop, him grabbing a poker, jabbing it in here (ellipses)"]

[Panel 7: The back of The Skull's head. He taps his scalp on the upper left side, and says, "(ellipses) it popping out right about there."]

[Panel 8: The Jack, looking on in distress, and Riker next to him, looking away from The Skull. The Skull continues, "I woke up on the floor as he was cleaning up the welds to hide the holes."]

[Panel 9: Hare looks up at The Skull, whose mouth and shoulder are just visible in frame. The Skull says, "I was back to work in a few hours." Hare looks genuinely upset as he says, "I didn't know (ellipses)"]

[Panel 10: The Skull glances down at Hare, in the viewer's position, and says, "Yeah. You wouldn't."

[Panel 11: Dee says, "(ellipses) Lift me up." The Skull, looking tired, asks, "Why?" Dee points at her character sheet and says, "In the (italics) game. To get up to the balcony."]

[Panel 12: Dee's hair parts around her eye slightly as she tilts her head, her expression sympathetic. She says, "(ellipses) If you still want to play."]

[Panel 13: Dee and The Skull, sitting in silhouette, the others at the table gone. The Skull rolls a die and says, "(ellipses) We'll try it." End ID]

npd is agreeing with a lot of things ppl say on here but not fully which makes you feel good cuz wow your experiences are soooooo unique but also seeing some sad messed up shit on here and feeling jealous because it feels like your trauma is smaller than an ant and not enough and you won't be taken seriously by anyone which always happens because every time you go in a space dedicated to traumatised individuals to vent you always see ppl who have it the absolute worst to the point where ur trauma feels like it isn't even trauma and you should be perfectly fine because how can a few beatings fuck you up so badly when everyone is out here surviving horrible things like rape and csa or even just beatings all the time/very often while you got mediocrely beat once in a while so you secretly wish and hope for the most terrible things to happen for an excuse and even trying to make it happen but failing and then you feel worse and you realise there will never be a place for you anywhere because ur too damaged to be around non-mentally ill ppl but when ur around mentally ill ppl ur trauma is so nonimportant and stupid and tiny you wonder how it exists at all

.

WELP. That takes the cake for the most unapologetic overt public display of a dad (who looked and acted like he was on roids) abusing his kids.

Usually I pick fights when I see child abuse in public but that guy was 6' 4" and had forearms bigger than my thighs.

Still reported it and coordinated it with the manager of the place we were eating at but holy shit man.

If my triggers weren't behind 1) an asian accent requirement or 2) trusted person requirement that would have FUCKED me up so bad

Unfortunately, same can not be said about my fiance.

Jesus christ.

I still can't get over the fact that growing up the cult's answer to "why is physically abusing kids bad" is "it's not socially acceptable" and not like. anything else

Also the fact that historical child physical abuse was lauded as something desirable and closer to what god wanted, and I don't mean historical as in 1950's-good-old-days, I mean like the 1700s stories they were having us read that included child physical abuse and was only vaguely disapproved of if someone asked about it

Okay, listen– Listen! Seeing videos like this I can’t dislike Ran, she’s a strong and powerful female character. She’s badass and she’s iconic and an inspiration for little girls. (Not kidding.)

She can fight, she powers through, she can knock down guys like houses of cards. She is a certified badass woman and inspiring both due to her femininity combined with her martial arts proficiency. Because she is feminine and still wipes the floor with your average criminal.

She is whiny at times, pining for “her” Shinichi but that’s fine, I can handle a whiny main girl and strong lead woman character if they are one and the same.

I am not much of a fan of her pining and her getting whiny/ crying for Shinichi every chance she gets. Still, I respect her as a strong female character.

However, towards the end of the video… those are the scenes why I – personally – consider ShinRan to be toxic and borderline abusive.

I had originally posted this in a reblog on my KID movie poll but finding this video gave me an incentive to make it its own post.

Aside from this video, one example is the after-credit of movie 3 with Ran straight-up threatening to physically abuse Shinichi. Like, folks, that’s my main reason I dislike her.

Ran started out as a strong female character, which is awesome, but over the years she descended to 1) “Save us, Shinichi!~” and 2) physically abusive

I get that she’s whiny at times and while I generally dislike whiny characters (see Martin from TMA), I can handle that

I can handle the Main Girl(tm) being whiny and pining for Shinichi

But that drive to keep her a strong female character who needs no man lead to her being increasingly physically abusive. She cries and pines, fine.

But then Shinichi does show up and what does Ran do? Either first thing, she hits him for being away for so long. Or she slaps/ hits him when he tells her he has to go back to his case and can’t stay. I understand her upset, I understand her pining.

Nobody has a right to vent their upset through physical abuse, though.

But a girl who can knock down a lamp-post, who can kick a man trough a window, ESPECIALLY has no right to raise her hand against her love-interest!

That’s one of the first things every martial art ever teaches you, do not resort to violence if there is even a sliver of another safe option.

I get that Kogoro knocking Conan about was played for shits and giggles, it’s a thing of that time when the manga/ anime started out. And accordingly Ran venting her upset through physical violence also was a product of that time and result of portraying her as the strong/ physically tough lead girl.

But she is his love interest for crying out loud and among many other scenes the after-credit of movie 3 emphasises that Shinichi is scared of her hitting him as soon as he gets back.

That’s not funny!

Physical abuse is not funny. And a strong female character directing physical abuse at her no-show love interest doesn’t make it funny.

My main ship always has been and always will be KaiShin. But I also know that would never become canon because DCMK doesn’t do queer. It’s “kid-friendly”, it can’t do queer.

But for goodness’ sake do I wish – desperately wish – the Main Couple became MasuShin instead. Masumi is on-par with him, she’s quick-witted, she’s silly, I love her queer vibes, and she understands/ encourages Shinichi every step of the way.

That’s another thing! Ran despises Shinichi’s work. It’s a common motive in fanfic (hence played up) that she forbids him from taking cases. But her dislike for his work – his passion his calling – is there.

I just can’t see ShinRan be healthy. And that opinion hasn’t changed in the 14 years I have been watching Detective Conan.

Edited to add:

I also want to clarify that I am not basing my opinion off the movies (alone), in fact, any DCMK movie outside the KID movies, movie 3 specifically, and movie 18 onwards, I haven’t watched in years. I am referencing movie 3 specifically because I recently watched it but this behaviour certainly is in the anime/ manga/ canon as well. The London Arc, that restaurant date in a skyscraper where he stood her up and Conan had to apologise (which also got used for an opening/ ending), the early episodes where Shinichi makes a comeback, the “Murder Suspect: Kudo Shinichi” Arc where he hides from Ran, and that’s just off the top of my head because I was on a fandom-hiatus for around 2 years and don’t care enough for ShinRan to rewatch these things.

I’m so sorry (sarcasm) that I didn’t provide receipts for my critique of Ran. But I’m also not about to go through the series for the entire purpose of making an itemised list of Ran abusing/ hitting Shinichi. If I do a rewatch from the early episodes on, I might keep a notepad handy and jot down the instances of Ran smacking Shinichi but don’t hold your breath because I tend to avoid the romance-heavy episodes in general, no matter the pair.

I am the ghost of the girl that was held against those glass doors, against beds, under the water. I wish I could pray for him more but sometimes my teeth grow sharp and I gnash and inflict my mouth on his shoulder, a twin scar for us. I promise if you bring him back I will hold him and console him, at least I really hope I would. I want to forgive, desperately, rabid dog with humanity foaming at its mouth. I wish it were easier, wish you hadn't been so cruel, wish whatever lost part of you came back and apologized. I know you are not your damage, but when I see your face in my dreams the vitriol comes up my throat and I scream, I scream, I cannot stop howling. my efforts to relate make me sick, humanizing the inhumane, let me understand the violence. I wish I could cut all of you out of me but my claws cannot seem to properly hold the scalpel. did you really think of me as a failure? is it funny when I cry and shake? is it better when I bark back? you love destruction, love when the cries come, love when the words I don't know how to say come out, hate when I call you what you are. I still remember seeing you on the porch. I still remember buying webkinz then when you, seated yourself comfortable and wild on the family couch. thrift store apologies. I say comfort him, he needs it. lay on the couch. I laugh I laugh I laugh. numb to the bone that he is entitled to chew. they couldn't relate to the force of nature he struck at me. "at least you have a dad" I defanged myself, I laid like a corpse. I thrashed, like a creature unsure if it can swim. I gasped for air like a suffocating fish. this was not fatherhood, this was not family, this was torture.

And, in a shocking turn of events, it turns out the “anti groomer” crowd is okay with child abuse, so long as it is a cis person doing it

This is the world they want. A world where they can use violence to force children to conform to them.

My memory’s is shit, but I remember exactly one instance of each of my parents hitting me that was arguably not actually a punishment for anything, but also I feel like I might be being dramatic about it and would appreciate a second opinion. My dad once ran up the stairs to hit me because he didn’t believe I’d left my brother alone for a minute to look for the air freshener. I was old enough that he’d mostly stopped hitting me about stuff so I assumed he was coming up to help me look right up until he slapped me. It felt really out of nowhere and I zoned out because I got really upset, but he told my also startled sibling that “I forgot who the adult was” or something. Not super sure what was going through his head there. There are actually two occasions with my mom. One being when my mom hit me over the head a couple times, because “I told her to shut up”. And I got really annoyed and hung up on this, because, what happened was she and my sister were yelling about something, and being loud enough that I couldn’t hear whatever I was listening to in my headphones, so I asked all of them in a completely even tone “Could y’all please be quiet?” I don’t know how I possibly could have phrased that better! And it’s occurring to me, she might have just been being unreasonable. Then there’s the time she tripped on a toy while she was walking away from me after asking me to do the dishes and immediately doubled back to hit me and yell at me for not immediately moving to do them or something, which at the time felt like she was misdirecting embarrassment, but I felt stupid once I called her out on that, and also am not that good at reading moods, but that wasn’t a normal extreme to jump to.

(Sorry for venting at u. U can ignore this if it’s too much)

but also I feel like I might be being dramatic about it and would appreciate a second opinion.

well there's no super-logical reason for hitting a kid in the first place like. punishment doesn't need to be hitting sooo. i already agree with you, in that regardless of the circumstances you are not "being dramatic" about feeling like you were unjustly beaten.

And it’s occurring to me, she might have just been being unreasonable.

I MEAN. YEAH I'D SAY SO.

Then there’s the time she tripped on a toy while she was walking away from me after asking me to do the dishes and immediately doubled back to hit me and yell at me for not immediately moving to do them or something

im no KING of memory either but i swear to god someone else told me this exact story. what is it about making small mistakes in front of their kids that makes some parents just fucking lose it <- knows what it is

anyway yea those weren't real punishments cuz you didn't do anything wrong those were power trips. not that they should've hit you to punish you in the first place but like. yknow.

"You know, I actually do give a shit about you." (from Regulus for Sirius) - @starwrittenfates

“Oh yeah? Well — I don’t…wait what?”

It wasn’t unlike them to argue now. It was what they spent most of their time doing. Regulus had let their parents get to him — and despite Sirius’ best efforts and pleas, it seemed like nothing worked. He knew that it was safer to conform to them — that Sirius being so outwardly rebellious against them was the reason why he got the worst side of his fathers anger. Part of him knew it was selfish of him to pack up and leave — that it would leave Regulus to deal with everything on his own, but he knew that if he stayed — he’d end up dead. This last fight with their parents left him more bruised than before, his muscles ached from the unforgivable curses that had been thrown at him. He shouldn’t have provoked them like he had…but he had needed some kind of punishment. He’d done something stupid at school to make every one of his friends in his friends group angry with him — and whether or not Snape deserved it, they hadn’t written or spoken to him over the break.

He paused his packing, silver eyes focusing on his brother as he processed his younger brother’s words. His tongue darted out to wet his lips — nose wrinkling at the sharp sting, because when curses weren’t enough, they resorted to using their hands instead. Despite the nonchalant air to him, the tears in his eyes were evident. He didn’t know that Regulus cared. He assumed he felt the same as their parents. Sirius took in a sharp breath of air, tearing his gaze away from him to focus on the suitcase with his things in it. He was going to the Potters house — even if James was still angry with him. None of his friends truly knew how terrible it had been to live here — how terrible they were to him.

“Come with me, Reggie,” he suddenly said, turning his gaze toward his younger brother, “I — the Potters will take you, too. I know they will.”

The season 2 end credits having symmetric pauldrons for Hunter has me thinking, coupled with the repeated imagery...

What if Hunter used to have pauldrons on both shoulders, but Belos always kept grabbing him at the right shoulder, lashing out at Hunter’s right side, etc.? Imagine him grabbing Hunter’s armored shoulder and grasping so hard the pauldron breaks; And this happened enough that Belos just stopped replacing the right pauldron entirely, hence the asymmetric look by Season 1?

In hindsight, I don’t like that the previous Golden Guards we’ve seen don’t have shoulder pauldrons... Can’t let themselves be too protected from Belos’ physical abuse.

my dad wants me to not let my brother’s meltdowns affect me as much. Love to do that, Dad, but you never did anything about my brother hitting me, throwing a table at me, dragging me around by the back of my neck, or the variety of verbal, mental, and physical abuse he put me through, so my brain is reacting to his anger rather appropriately.

It's not fair to ask you not to be affected by literal violence towards you, not even if it's caused by a meltdown, and I'm really sorry your family is expecting that from you!