#out of all game genres im worst at platformers
Text
I posted 9,247 times in 2022
That's 6,712 more posts than 2021!
3,270 posts created (35%)
5,977 posts reblogged (65%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@/theminecraftbee
@/habeascorpseus
@/renchanters
@/cadaverkeys
@/redstonedust
I tagged 5,314 of my posts in 2022
Only 43% of my posts had no tags
#hermitcraft - 826 posts
#asks - 591 posts
#mcyt - 507 posts
#hermitcraft spoilers - 151 posts
#empires spoilers - 142 posts
#dsmp - 122 posts
#double life spoilers - 106 posts
#mcc - 103 posts
#empires smp - 101 posts
#ask game - 93 posts
Longest Tag: 139 characters
#this is about datd and hounds tooth and the boatem roadtrip and parting glass (kinda) and fixed & dialated and icarus and most of ehk and--
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
im scared of people that actually organise in minecraft. dont talk to me unless your hotbar looks like this at all times
See the full post
12,613 notes - Posted July 31, 2022
#4
anyone else go from an "omg yaoi o///o" kid to a "yaoi is a fetishizing genre repackaging gay love in a way that caters to problematic cishet women" teen to a "have a merry yaoi christmas everybody" adult
13,006 notes - Posted December 4, 2022
#3
non-human trans characters who use different gender signifiers from us is sooo underrated. transfem bird person who thinks her colorful plumage means she cant pass only for every human she meets to be completely clueless. transmasc slime person who uses food dye to change themselves to bright orange, leading everyone they know to question how the hell slime gender works.
14,215 notes - Posted September 27, 2022
#2
as much as we joke about scaring off twitter refugees around these parts im like. genuinely sorry to all of ya'll moving over. losing your main platform (especially as an artist/creator) to the incompetence of one of the worst human beings alive sucks major ass
41,604 notes - Posted November 18, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
nothing more disappointing than a shower with low water pressure. i don’t want to feel like a wet sad beast left out in the rain i want to be power washed.
83,311 notes - Posted August 29, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
22 notes
·
View notes
Note
multiples of 3^^
oh god thats so many
3. Do you like to get 100% achievements?
if its something within reach yeah! i have a few games 100%ed. huniepop for one. its actually a dream of mine to one day 100% huniepop in a single run of the game. itd be hard but i believe in myself.
6. Last game you finished?
finished...... uhhh sakura shrine girls. if id beaten that last monster in monster hunter i couldve said that but i failed. oh well
9. A console and/or handheld you’ve never played but would like to try?
i think my cousin had a dreamcast and i was kind of fascinated by the weird controller shape. i dont think theres any games im specifically interested on it but i would like to mess around with one.
12. answered already!
15. answered already!
18. A game you’d like to replay that you haven’t
mmm are there any? ive replayed most of the games i enjoyed enough to play once. i want to finish my 2nd playthrough of ff14 though. im still in stormblood on that.
21. A boss you think is really cool
does rakna-kadaki von monsterhunterrise count. shes not really a boss unless you consider all monsterhunter monsters to be bosses. OH. OH RIGHT FUCK. hephaistos ff14. i love that fight. raid bosses count as bosses for sure. i just redid that one earlier tonight
24. A “Wow” moment of awe
i think the first time i really experienced something like this was the first time i played through twilight princess when you swordfight ganondorf at the end. it was like. such a wildly different experience from the standard like "swing your sword and you'll maybe clang against the enemy and not do damage" like it felt to child emily like a real proper swordfight. i thought it was really cool.
27. already answered!
30. Spyro or Crash Bandicoot?
crash bandicoot babeyyyyyyyyyyyyy there was this guy at my old church who was like a full ass middle aged adult and he was friends with my parents and we'd go over to visit sometimes and he'd let us go up into his weird attic where he just had a ps1 for some reason and me and my brother played crash bandicoot up there a lot. good times. it was a little hot in his house. he lived right on the street where they had community festivals every summer so it was nice to have a base to go back to when we got tired outside. his front lawn was small but it was good to lay in and watch fireworks from. real nice guy. im rambling. crash bandicoot rules
33. Someone has never played a video game before but is open to trying any genre. What game would you recommend as their first?
if im throwing my anxiety out the window, id probably recommend super mario bros the original. if youve never played a video game, it would be really hard to get recommended something with a complex control scheme or unintuitive menuing and shit. so something with just a few buttons and an easy-to-understand goal is probably good for a starting point. im sure theres a lot of platformers like that.
36. What platform do you play on?
pc but i have a lot of old nintendo consoles and a ps4. just in case. its hard to get the gumption for them tho
39. Do games need difficulty sliders?
i think difficulty options would be more doable. its important that games are accessible to people with disabilities that would prevent them from playing on whatever the base difficulty is.
42. Worst game you ever played?
im very easy to please. i remember being very disappointed by various kart racers in my youth though. at least, i played them once and did not play them again. there was an m&m branded kart racer for the wii, and also i found diddy kong racing for n64 to be too slow for my tastes. but also i was a child.
45. Favorite content creator?
settled, the runescape guy who made the morytania-locked ultimate iron man account. i just recently rewatched his 12-hour video compilation of that. i literally came close to crying a couple times. its good.
48. Most satisfying villain death?
i havent killed him yet but theres no way i wouldnt be satisfied with the death of that fucking bastard in tales of berseria. one day im going to kill him. fuck that guy. i would say asahi ff14 bc i hate him with the passion of 10,000 suns but his death was not satisfying. i would like to kill him over again.
51. How often do you skip cut scenes?
never unless ive seen it before. well, except the cutscenes in monster hunter rise for when u go on a hunt for a new monster. i sometimes skp those. but in most cases i wouldnt dare.
54. answered!
57. Ask anything you wish!
lena please u have to give me something for this one. its okay i will provide the question. "whats a game everyone should play no matter what even if they dont think its that good?"
play shining force
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
i defeated Fae Tactics
i love how many tactics games need to put "tactics" in their title. imagine that with any other genre.
so theres a genre of indie game i like to call "that ratatouille gif". i have attached it for your convenience
you know what i mean. Bloodstained, Yooka-Laylee, Bomb Rush Cyberfunk, Palworld, its a whole thing. this is a dangerous genre to classify things into, because theres a very thin line between "taking heavy inspiration" and "being a sequel". like, its easy to say that Paradise Killer is a Kill The Past game with that got sent to the wrong address in the morphogenetic field. theres the moon symbolism, the assassins, theres literally a silver case for gods sake. but i cant call it a ripoff because it brings so much unique to the table with the worldbuilding, presentation, and gameplay.
thats how i feel about Fae Tactics. when it first lit that spark, inspiring me to play it for as many hours as i could as many days as i could until i finished it, i felt my childhood. i remember one of the first video games i ever owned: final fantasy tactics a2 grimoire of the rift. i played the ass off of that game, expiring everthing you could do multiple times over. it inspired a lifelong respect for the tactical rpg in my bones, and Fae Tactics scratched an itch ive been feeling for a while
i dont want to give the impression that im nostalgia blind, thats not the case at all. comparing a trpg to final fantasy tactics (even what i consider the worst game in retrospect - man the law mechanic was a pain) is like comparing a fighing game to street fighter. remember that time capcom tried to sue someone who made a fighting game that stole too many mechanics and design elements from street fighter 2. the court said, paraphrased, "sf2 was so influential on the genre that MOST games have street fighter mechanics now. like, platformers with powerups arent ripping off mario, that just how platformers work now." yeah thats what fft did too.
what im saying is, the game takes the fundamentals of the genre as estalished by its best examples, and builds on them in unique and engaging ways. monsters have a random chance of dropping cards, which lets you equip them as summons for the next battle. its great to have more experimental low-stakes party members. instead of focusing all your valuable main character slots on healers if youre going into a heavy damage fight, you can just bring a bunch of water summons to power through it and support your glass cannons until they end the fight pronto. or, you can have a lot of ranged summons that suppliment your tankier party members; or expendable summons to distract enemies while you buff your party. this is a huge strength of any tactical game - letting you stratagize in a way that is functional to your playstyle.
something id like to note is that there are tons of mechanics, but i only felt overwhelmed at the very beginning. by fight, like, three? i was totally in sync with the games tools and how to use em. this is tough. i remember by playthrough of zanki zero, where i got so overwhelmed by shikabane and character relationship gene splicing and the crafting mechanic and the cloning and the aging and the attack windup and those stupid tentacle attacks that i just fizzled out and gave up trying to comprehend stuff (until chapter six, but im getting distracted). i never saw a new mechanic in Fae Tactics that made me think "whats the point? im not doing this". instead, i was always interested in how i can use this new element to enhance my gameplay. its that classic theory of Get To vs. Have to. i never had to do the cooking minigame every time i slept - i got to play a game where i boosted my partys stats.
so how about the story? i think it was pretty good! each continent that you can explore has its own little isolated plot, and while it all connects in the end, i was worried it would fall into the same trap that i felt saints row 2 did. it didnt feel like you had a gang, it felt like you had 3 friends who all did their own thing and you helped. i think this is managed in the most effective yet realistic way - have peony as the center of the communication because its just her personality. shes doing the talking because shes just a friendly person with leadership skills. also like 1/3 of her party cant talk. the only hurdle then is making everyone feel too isolated - i wont lie, there are shades of that, but i think letting the characters relax in the background if they arent immediately relevant to a scene is a good compromise of this. like, your dog chico doesnt always show up in cutscenes unless they have a weapon upgrade or something. thats fine, cuz like, theyre a dog. itd waste everyones time if everyone chimed in every time anything happened. so its not like gat is inexplicably uninterested in the non-ronin gangs, its just that characters are allowed to be offstage if they dont have any lines. it really helps the group feel more cohesive and friendly, and in general it feels less like oure going on mission sidequests waiting for the area to clean and instead youre going on a real ass adventure
also, if i can be candid, matilda is one of the most badass characters ive ever seen. i love how her intro quest brings so much validity to the scrap youve been collecting so far as more than just "upgrade points". it really builds up peonys compassion and heroism when she puts in that much work to save the life of a stranger, and the time limit adds so much urgency while still being very generous, at least to my collectathon playstyle. finally i just love her character conceptually. shes a fairy that esentially rides her own iron lung like a mecha. the fact that shes lowkey the best ranged fighter in the game doesnt hurt.
closing thoughts. i was insane about this game when i first played it. like, i cannot bring myself to play anything else because im so enraptured about this game. im talking "oh yeah i guess i havent had a meal today" at midnight. thats how you know that youve got a very special game. also that i am very autistic.
0 notes
Text
tbh indie games i feel don't really have "trends" people kind of just play what they like. i think it's more like what's advertised the most
in aaa games, most rn are like action adventure open world where you fight monsters and deal w relationships cuz ppl like that and it's been that way for years but like, i know that for indie games, roguelikes were popular for a few years and now i've been seeing stuff that's calling 2023 "the year of the medroidvania" and like...i guess there's a few medroidvanias im looking forward to this year (if they release this year) but otherwise, im pretty sure there's games of all genres coming out. i mean, maybe there have been trends w indie games...it just depends what was big
like minecraft obvi and a lot of ppl were really into life sims/sandbox games (i think stardew is kind of part of this but like...later)
then undertale came and more weird rpgs popped up
then hades and roguelikes popped up everywhere (or elements of them)
and now medroidvania
but i mean eh, i play what i like. but like, aaa games it feels very similar for everything. looking at the goty awards most of the aaa/aa noms are very similar, it's the indie games that have some difference. looking at what was nominated for goty last year it's like, mostly action-adventure games. like, they all have elements of being adventure games. stray even falls into this, as it's primarily an exploration game (technically it has elements of puzzle platforming but the platforming isn't that challenging cuz it tells you where to go...the worst part of the game is the enemies)
aaa games seem mostly like shooters and open world adventure exploration rpg type games. occasionally a genre from the past will resurface (last year, 3d platformers got a few entries) but like, it's mostly shooters and open world. idk and idc
0 notes
Text
Desperado — 09 (M) | JJK
Pairing: Badboy!Jungkook X Reader
Summary : A messy situationship at it’s finest. You don’t even know whats headed your way, just even engaging in the slightest within him. See, he has an assignment to complete. A mission granted by his father thats do or die. You just so happen to be a major pawn in that assignment. He didn’t mean to take an interest in you. Surely it was an accident right? Only except. you hold much value in this game that he’ll do anything to complete it. Oblivious is what you are. Poor thing. Poor.. Poor thing.
Genre: Mature/ Mafia!Jungkook
Trailer: xxxxx preview 01 02 03 04 05 06 07 08
Word Count : 7.3k
Warnings : This honestly isn’t for the light hearted and the weak…High angst, usage of drugs, drug mentions, mental illness, switch!jungkook, Brat reader, possible stockholm syndrom, kidnapping, assault, death of side characters, murder, weapons, usage of weapons, masturbation, physical violence, blood, alcohol, weed, unprotected and protected sex, spanking, honestly its a lot of aruging…
Copyright: please do NOT repost, translate, or modify my works in any way, shape or form, on any platform. If found doing so , it is considered as plagiarism and appropriate LEGAL action will be taken
TW : Suicide, Body Hanging for display.
Her hair moves so flawlessly and the her breasts spill over the mini triangle bra with each sensual move she makes. The way her waist and body whines against the pole could leave absolutely anyone in a trance.The rhythm of the music blasts in the air and she’s directly on beat to it, not missing anything through the song playing.
The led lights are dimmed low enough in a red color, but enough for everyone to see. Shes uncaring at the men in the room sizing her up in her designer high waisted thong that hugs her hips very well, showing off her round, plump ass. That was what she wanted, the attention all on her while they throw hundred dollar bills for her.
“ Who knew someone could get down and dirty like that.”
To no suprise, Jimin, the ladies man but heartbreaker for sure, enters the private room and closing the door beind him. He throws a stack of money towards her, as he was the seemingly late one to the meet-up.
“ Jungkook is late, he’s never late. What’s taking him so long?” A grumpy Namjoon says, looking down at his apple-watch. It’s half past 10 pm and usually he’s the first one here.
“ He’s probably sucking up to yn-”
The girl turns her head sharply towards the boys, overhearing what they said. She furrows her eyebrows at them, “ Why would he be doing that..”
Taehyung lets out a small groan. “ Because Mr. Lover boy has gotten himself a crush. The worst part is, she’s his target for this mission.”
“ Shut the fuck up. I don’t have a crush on her, i’m just doing my job.” A semi-loud voice roars through the doors. Everyone stops to look at the sudden intruder and to relief it’s him, Jungkook.
Of course he has to lie about that. He knew for sure he caught himself up with you and the feelings were strong. Though the big bad mafia boy catching feelings for his target is highly uncommon, and Jungkook doesn’t know the consequences.
“ Jungkook..” The girl says, frowning at him with her hand on her hips. He takes a seat on the couch and tilts his head at her to go on. She rolls her eyes and shakes her head at the young boy. “ You fell for her.. so what about us?”
It isn’t hard to say that he doesn’t have any more feelings left for the girl. She and him both knew what they agreed upon. The pair had history together, sexual to be exact. Romance was hardly there if he were to be honest. She’d began actually working for Won-Shik, under this club they’re in now which is owned by him, a year ago. Jungkook had entered the club once when he was considered a minor, but that was to pass a message along to the girl from his father. He was told to go straight in and straight out. Of course, he did the exact opposite. Sat around looking at all the half naked women that night as the music blared loud.
It wasn’t until his phone rang and it was Casper telling him to hurry up and come back to the car, is when he finally decided to get up and look for the girl. When he did find her, it was over with for him. The girl was, and still is, stunning. One of the many foreign girls in the club but she’s the one that stood out of all. She wore nothing but a small outfit as she danced on the pole. Her beauty mesmorized Jungkook that night as he watched her dance in awe. Soon enough she came to him showing her her dimply smile and perfect teeth.
He was stunned alright. She knew he looked to be too young for the club so she asked him his age. He told her, and thats when she nearly called security on him until he told her who he was and affiliated with. The message was passed along accordingly to her, she got the memo. Jungkook though, kept coming back to that club and always going to where she was, following her around the club like a lost puppy. She enjoyed his time, as all she did was sit and talk with him and that turned out to not be enough for him. He wanted her, and she insisted that he was too young for her.
So Jungkook did what any other person would do when feeling rejected, he started to present himself like a true man and mafia boy. The gym was his favorite place after that and he buffed up very well. That jawline of his got sharper and his personality gained more confidence and dominant by the time he turned nineteen. He of course kept going at her, shooting his shot anytime he could and yet kept getting denied. It wasn’t until his nineteenth birthday is when he begged her telling her how bad he wanted her, and that lap dance he kept suggesting months before. Since it was his birthday and he was legal, she gave him what he wanted but that still wasn’t enough for him. He wanted her underneath him bad. The slight age gap between them didn’t phase Jungkook at all. What he wants, is what he gets.
And he did.
And kept getting it, and getting it, and getting it since then.
“ Relax baby, I’ll still be coming around you know that.” His voice is smooth, smirking at her. He wasn’t going to be coming around as much, but he knew that would disappoint her.
She purses her lips and begins walking towards him and sits directly on his lap, straddling him. Jungkook can’t push her off the way he wants to because it would confirm the crush rumors from the boys about you. So he lets her sit there, uncomfortable as hell for him.
Namjoon clears his throat to get the rest of the group attention. It’s nearly 11 pm and Crystal has been blowing up his phone ever since he stepped foot in the club. He told her beforehand about the meeting, but she wanted him at her apartment by at least 1 am.
“ We all know you love yn, but remember who you are Jungkook.” Namjoon says, glaring at the boy who returns the glare back at him. “ Fuck you. Like I said, im just doing my job.”
“ If you were doing your job Jungkook, there’s no way in the hell that it should take you this long. “ Jin retaliates. He knows hes right.
By this time, Jimin had finished preparing seven perfectly rolled blunts filled with the most finest imported weed. He places them onto the tray, taking his own and then passing the tray to Yoongi. Each of the boys take their own until it reaches down to Jungkook who takes his and puts the tray back onto the table.
“ Enough about her. I was summoned to go over the details for the next seven days. “ Jungkook groans, sparking his blunt and inhaling. He passes it Melanie, who takes it to inhale as well.
A malicious smile comes upon Yoongi’s face as he exhales the smoke into the already fogged up air. One thing he loves to talk about is torture. One of bangtan’s best walking torture device to be known.
“ Tonight we are starting.. I say you let me go first.” Yoongi pauses, taking a long inhale of his blunt. “ I’m coming for their trade transaction place. Arson, let me burn the bitch down and then fuck around with their father.”
It’s a good idea. Sending a message after burning it down straight to it’s opponent. Fire is Yoongi’s thing, and that’s his signature marking in the Bangtan Boys. The father of the shooter was one of their dealers, until the shooter’s father fucked up by taking money out of bangtan’s cut little by little. The boys knew about it, they waited for the perfect time back then to take action. Of course, giving them a mission to complete.. or so he thought. The mission was a false one. Created by Jungkook to catch him off guard. Jungkook used some of the mafia men on Won-Shik’s side to set up a trade off of drugs, decieving the shooter’s father by thinking they were just setting up a regular mafia trade from another gang. The trade was complete, but their protection was no more. Needless to say, the men didn’t even make it back to their cars. It was a bloodshed war between Jungkook’s assigned men and their men. The point was to send a memo that the Bangtan Boys were coming for them, and coming hard.
Everynight for two weeks unimaginable signs were sent to their family. Ranging all the way from several gunshot bullets going through their home, to severed heads of previous betrayers of the bangtan boys, sitting right on their porch. By now, all the other gangs in Korea knew not to have any business with them.
“ Day 2 I want it. I’m going for the mother. That scamming bitch and her precious flower shop? I’m shooting it up. Whoever lives, lives. Whoever dies, dies.” Jimin shrugs, smirking as he leans back in his spot.
“ Day 3, for me I’m sending another message. One of their men is gonna die in my god damn hands. I’ll be sure to take a selfie and send it to the father. The body will lay hanging on that pretty little oak tree in their yard.” Taehyung says. The boys are roar with shock that he’s said that. Normally he doesn’t like touching a dead body, so it’s a change for him.
The boys continue listing off the days and assigned tasks for the rest of the night into the wee early morning. Namjoon left after his, of course going straight to his girls apartment. They don’t judge him, seeing as though the boy really is in love and knows when and how to handle it. He definately doesn’t mix business and his love life together, unlike his other hyung. Soon enough the banter and socializing ends and it’s time for Yoongi first.
Night 1
It doesn’t take long for Yoongi to find the place. The empty steets of Seoul have soon faded into just dirt roads with the city left behind. The humming of his porsche echos through the night time air. Yoongi takes one final turn, making sure to pull into the place slowly like a true hunter keeping it’s eye on its prey. It’s not a full house tonight, even better.
Taking the jug of gasoline out his car, he carries it with ease up to the empty warehouse. The wildlife outside don’t make a noise. As if they know who’s approaching and just shut right up. Forty degrees fahrenheit outside and lastnight’s snowfall piled all around.The darkness outside is haunting, anything could pop out at any second to kill the man. That doesn’t scare him at all. Darkness is always what he crave. Inside and out.
“ Sir.. do you want us to go in with you?”
Yoongi stops dead in his tracks. He’d almost forgotten about the back-up men Jungkook ordered for him. It’s not like he needed them anyways, but since Jungkook can’t be there with Yoongi, that was the next best choice.
Rolling his eyes without turning around,“ No. Wait in your cars. I’ll handle it on my own.”
Just like that. The boys are off like lightening. Yoongi takes one final step towards the two double doors, and begins to pour the gasoline at it’s starting point. Usually, he’d go from the inside out, but seeing as though he wanted them to scurry out fearing for their lives, this is the next option as well. Soon enough, the enire jug is empty and he’s now poured all of it around the outside of the warehouse. Leaves crunch with every step he makes back to the starting point. Part of him hopes they can’t hear him from the outside. It’ll ruin the plans.
The lighter in his pocket feels so smoothe against his palms as he reaches for it. It’s one of his signature ones with his initials on it. An andrenaline rush runs through his veins as flicks the ignition with his thumb. The flame all bright and orange as he stands there infront of the building. It’s going to be a damn good night.
Without hesitating, Yoongi runs his fingers through his hair and throws the lighter right onto the gasoline puddles. The way the whole ring of fire lights up infront of his eyes makes him laugh hysterically while watching the whole building go into flames. The loud crackling sounds of the now decomposing warehouse jumps him back into reality.
He heads right towards the big tree next to the right of the warehouse, leaning on it with one foot up against it with his hands crossed. That sinister smile doesn’t leave his face. He enjoys the view of the men from the inside running out as fast as they can. Some falling in the ring of fire in the process. The fire is no match for any human as they try to stop drop and roll. Ha, as if that would work with a 15 foot fire consuming the warehouse. The dead bodies pile up on their own, just burning in the fire over their simple mistakes of falling and thinking they would survive the fire.
Until the golden egg comes out. He’s furious as runs out perfectly, as if he’s been through this, without managing to catch on fire. Yoongi chuckles, leaning off the tree. “ Kang Dong-Woo.”
Usually Yoongi would use the honorfics to people who were much older than him. In this case though, he doesn’t deserve honorifics.
“ Min Yoongi.” He says, harshness laced within his voice. Dongwoo frowns when nearing the man. He knows what Yoongi is capable of, and that’s what sets his fight for flight into action.
“ Let’s get straight to it. Your daughter is after our leader. She seems to be doing the dirty work for you yeah? Did you not train her enough? Of course you know she wont be able to live after this right?”
Dongwoo laughs right into Yoongi’s face as if he was joking. It angers Yoongi, so he grabs Dongwoo by the shirt and drags the man over to the fire where he kicks the back of his legs to where he’s kneeling inches away from it.
“ I don’t think this is a laughing matter, Dongwoo.” He growls, tightening his grip around Dongwoo’s arms that are behind his back. “ You want to die?”
“ She’s gonna fuck you all over.” He growls.” You may think she’s not capable of finishing off you guys one by one, but she is. I raised and trained her since a kid. She’s stronger with more energy than me. She’ll kill you all when you least expect it.”
Yoongi rolls his eyes at him.” The dumb bitch can’t even shoot right. Going for someone else knowing Jungkook would save them is an ameteur move. Should’ve went straight for his damn head.”
“ I’ll make sure she’ll bring you guys hell Min Yoongi. All of you. Tell that shit to Jungkook and his daddy for me alright?” He mocks, laughing again at the boy to taunt him.
Yoongi doesn’t care for it. He’s had enough of this foolish talk. With one swift move he kicks the man’s back making him fall down to the left side, away from the fire. He’s lost it. He’s totally lost it at this point and there is no going back. Kick after kick after kick, he doesn’t stop. No. Not until the Dongwoo is sure to cough up blood. The crimson liquid poors from his mouth as he lays there. No remorse is felt.
Besides, the bastard bitch needed to get the message. Consider it message recieved.
Night 2
The flower shop is full, but not full to its entirety. There's tons of different bouquets and arrangements set around the pretty shop, from what he can see from the outside. It’s almost closing time, an hour left. Jimin’s fingertips grip on the steering wheel, anxious but patient to make his move. He’s running off of pure adrenaline and 2 cans of monster that are crushed and sitting in the passenger seat. Waiting isn’t his forte and he’d honestly like to get this show on the road now.
The moon is out and shining bright tonight. A sigh escapes his lips when he glances again at the shop. The only reason he’s not done it yet is due to the fact that there is a child and his mother inside. Rule number 2 of Bangtan, injure no child. The price to pay if you were to break the rule? Simply it would cost you your own damn life.
As if time would of went any slower for the boy, the child and his mother finally made their transaction and made it out of the store, heading across the street to continue their journey of shopping. It’s go time.
He knew to come prepared with his bulletproof vest and full face ski mask, long Sleeve black shirt to cover all the markings he has and also the two tattoos on each of his arms. He knew that the little lady wouldn’t be so dumb to not carry, or at-least have someone inside that would be her undercover security. Considering who her husband is, there’s no way she won’t be protected.
Oh how innocent the people look to not know what’s coming next. Jimin loads his Glock 19 with golden bullets that have Bangtan Boys initials and symbols on it just before pulling his mask down and getting out the car. He makes sure to signal his back-up men to create a distraction so he could make his entrance. Sure enough, a loud boom in the near distance of what sounds like some type of construction falling, echos loudly. It turns heads from all around to look where the sound came from, making it easy for Jimin to slide into the flower-shop.
Not a sound made by him. He draws his gun and pulls the safety off the trigger, then cocks it. Eyes are all on him as his eyes shift around the room looking for his target. There she is, eyes wide in the middle of a transaction for two middle aged couple. His eyes set into hers, lowly smiling and pointing it at her. The way everyone frantically screams and cries out doesn’t phase Jimin, no. It just encourages him even more as he starts firing shots mid air, shooting any and every person in sight for the hell of it. Bodies drop to the ground, and the bloodbath begins.
Jimin doesn’t hesitate to step over everybody, eyes still set on his target. The middle aged couple’s shrieks were cut short by their bodies dropping to the ground with three shots each to their hearts.
“ Park J-” He cuts her crying off with a finger to his lips, daring her to say his name in public. She gets the memo. “ I wouldn’t if I were you.”
The barrel is pressed against her temple as she trembles with fear. He cocks his head to the side, smiling at her when he taps the gun against her head harshly, repeatedly. “ You know why I’m here.”
“ You kill me and she will murder you all.”
Jimin chuckles, “ That’s what you guys think. We don’t have time for your gimmicks. It was you guys who stole money from us. Why did you think you’d still be protected from the law from us? Getting your daughter to go for the leader first is dumb, like the rest of you.”
“ We almost went to prison for you guys, remember that? We needed that cut money from you guys to pay off our legal fees. Thats why we stole. We completed your dirty work while trying to pay off the fees, its the least you guys could of did as a reward.”
“ That’s not how it would’ve worked. You fucked up. All of you.”
With two shots to the leg, she falls into Jimins arms. He rolls his eyes and throws his body off of him and onto the floor. It’s going to be a headache trying to explain to the dry cleaners why there is blood stains on his designer ripped jeans.
Night 3
It was too easy, way too easy. It took nothing to lure that man right into Taehyung’s trap. Nothing but a simple few slick comments made to him for him to get a riled up at the wrong person. Taehyung had spotted the man prior heading into the park with a small duffle bag. He assumed it was for a night trade off for some other person who had delivered drugs for him. Nontheless, it was merely too easy to pose as the alleged person who completed the mission.
A rookie. That guy must’ve been a rookie.
When the money was handed off to Taehyung, he tossed it to the side and struck the man down. The two did fight on the concrete floor for a bit but the man was no match for Taehyung’s quick moves. Taehyung’s pocket knife dances around the man’s throat as his body is pinned to the ground.
“ Rookie mistake not verifying if I’m the real one.” He chuckles, pressing the blade against the mans neck. The man pleads for his life but it’s no use. Message must be sent, that it’s no way you’ll fuck around with Bangtan and escape.
“ You know, I would’ve trained you more than Dongwoo. Letting the weakest link go run an errand? Ha. Your boss set you up for that one.”
Although the man is merely innocent, it doesn’t stop Taehyung from slicing into the man’s neck. A blood curdling scream comes out, but soon hushed over as his will of breathing and screaming is cut. It’s music to Tae’s ears.
The body is transfered per request of Taehyung to his back-up men. It’s not like him to touch a bloody dead body. So they take him into the back of their car and follow Taehyung to the residential house of the shooter. Nothing more than 10 minutes away.
The lights are cut off in the neighborhood. Not a sound made other than the two cars coming down the street. Everyone seems to be at peace and quiet in their homes. Sleeping to say the least. Upon arrival, Taehyung parks his car right infront of the house. The back-up men drag the bloody body out the car and onto their lawn, placing it right under the oak tree.
Taehyung takes the rope be brought along with him, and begins to tie multiple knots around a sturdy branch from the tree. When done, he wraps some of the rope around the dead boy’s neck, tying it into a slipknot and hoists him up high into the air.
The body dangles from the tree like a flag waving in the sky proud and high. He signals for the boys that the assignment is done and that they’re free to leave. Taehyung though, he just sits back in admiration of his work. It’s been a while sinice he felt this way. So he stands there soaking it all in.
Message recieved.
Since it’s been three entire days of hell, Jungkook knew his day will be approaching faster than ever. If only it could get here faster though. Truth is, Won-Shik isn’t too happy about Jungkook’s plan still not being complete. At this point, the father is going against him any chance he gets to just get this over with.
Luckily, tonight he’d be able to meet with his father again with some good news. It hasn’t been brought to his attention yet about your father being in Taiwan. With the technology of Won-Shik’s men, your father could be brought here within 12 hours tops.
“ Father.” Jungkook says, entering his office doors. The boy fixes his leather jacket upon entering and places his hands back into his pockets. “ I have news.”
Won-Shik is one to not play around with. Interupting his office time is a big, big deal. One is to not enter without it being urgency. That rule still applies to the heir of the company. “ It better be damn good because your plan isn’t getting anywhere Jeon Jungkook.”
Won-Shik takes his glasses off and sets them to the side on his desk. Its full of papers and photos of himself and Jungkook when he was a child. His favorite one right in the middle, where Jungkook had just ate some cherry flavored ice cream and his lips were all red as he smiled for the camera showing his two front teeth. It reminded him of when Jungkook was easier to manage rather as to now where he’s a damn menace.
“ Taiwan. Her father is in Taiwan. I don’t think it’s Taipei though.. he’s hiding so a city wouldn’t be ideal. I say search the mountains first, then the city.”
Bringing this proposal to the table meant that Jungkook wanted to atleast gain his father’s trust back. Hell, he wanted all this to be over with by now because you were driving him crazy to the point where he’s beginning to actually forget who the hell he was and why he was assigned this mission. The plan was not to fall, but to complete. He’d be lying if he wasn’t knee deep in love with you right now. It all comes down to him protecting you from his father at this point.
“ So your little plan is suddenly working huh.. still doesn’t mean she gets to run free Jungkook.” He says, smirking at the boy to challange him. Jungkook knew that. Once it’s proven that your father is the snitch, all of the family dies.
You’re innocent. Too innocent to know that or to be even tangled in that mafia mess of his. Part of him wishes he never met you and never had been assigned this mission. Then everything would be so damn different and emotions wouldn’t be caught up in this. From the moment he met you, he knew it would be hard. You have always held a special part in his heart. Only because you acted just like his mother. Sweet, but sassy and it hurt him a lot on how you remind him of her. You even word your words just like her, even when upset. Everything about you, is just like her.
It was hard to not get attached to wanting to get to know you more. Somehow he thought that if he got to know you, he’d somehow fill that hole inside him of his mother’s disappearance. As if you were going to be his new replica as you would be the one to put a band-aid on that hole to patch it up.
Here you are, not knowing you could die any moment and it will all be thanks to Jeon Jungkook, who couldn’t save you fast enough.
“ I know. But she’s innocent. She doesn’t even know her dad worked with us. I swear she doesn’t.” Jungkook bites his lip in hopes that there could be someway to save you by the hands of your father.
“ I dont care!” He roars, jumping out his seat. Jungkook flinches, backing up a bit from the sudden outburst. “ You know not to mix business and pleasure. You reap what you sew. You get to pay the consequences.”
Jungkook knew that though.
“ Father-”
“ Nothing more. I’ll have my team start the search right now. You on the other hand, get you god-damn shit together Jungkook. You’re the heir, not a damn lover-boy. Got it?”
It is no use of arguing with him. Jungkook looks down at the ground and nods his head yes just before Won-Shik dismisses him. It’s going to hurt. Seeing you dead. He hopes for a miracle can happen, that your father will not be the snitch. That you and him could live happily ever after. There will no be any happily ever after about this situation though. One will die. Just a matter of who it will be.
The vibrating sensation in his pocket snaps him out of his trance. An incoming call from Namjoon. It’s alarming since today is Namjoon’s day of hell, and only one thing could be happening right now if he’s calling for Jungkook.
There’s been a mistake.
“ What is it Namjoon.”
“ She fucking outsmarted me. The bitch caught on to where my location would be for the next kill. I don’t know where the fuck she is Jungkook.. this is bad.”
Jungkook sighs heavily, closing his eyes while letting out strings of curses come from his mouth. Shit couldn’t get possibly worse than this right now. Namjoon said he’d wanted to go straight for the killer and bust her up a bit. Give her some words and a branding on her. He had wanted to do it with a knife, carving the initals of Bangtan Boys into her upper hip. Namjoon had zero problem tracking her next location down, as he had been keeping an eye on her all day. To him, it seemed as if she would be heading to an orchestra shop in the city. Every step she took, Namjoon took it too.
Until she rounded the corner to go inside the shop and she wasn’t there. There wasn’t any outlet. The shop was on a dead end street surrounded by other shops that they both had passed. There was no way she didn’t go back, he would of saw it. He saw her go into the store, so she had to be there right?
Wrong. You see she knew all this time that Namjoon was followering her while in disguise. The orchestra shop where she led him to, she knew the owner. They were good friends. She had spoken to him asking if that she could use his upstairs office to read over some of the newest edition of music pieces for her to practice. He obliged, and she made up there in time before Namjoon came inside.
Up there, she’d be lying if she wasn’t scared to death. All this week the boys had definately given her hell. Each day with zero remorse. It was taking a toll on her for sure. Taking up this assignment by herself wasn’t something easy but she wanted to prove to him that she can be just like him. That she wanted to work with him too to take down Bangtan for decieving them and leaving them in the dust.
She can’t do it. The boys are to expierenced for her. It’s a bad mistake that she cannot come back from. You see, she thought it would be easy to befriend you and become close to you after you’d laid eyes upon Jungkook your first day here. She knew you’d soon fall for him, like any other girl did, and that would be her easy acess to him from you. It was all planned beforehand. To be quiet and observe you and your moves with him. In her mind, Jungkook needed to die first. The boys can’t function all that well without him, so that would be the weak spot to take advantage of if he would’ve died when she knew he’d take the bullet for you. She coudn’t shoot him first, it’d be too straightforward and blunt.
It was going all well. Deep in the inside she was jealous of you as well. Sungmin had been her crush for years, they even almost dated. Until you came along and he left her in the dust for you. Sungmin is everything she wanted in a boy, but you took that away from her. Her chances to date him ruined by you. It hurt everyday to see him head over heels in love with you, when that was just her at one point before you came along. Not only that, but she seen the way you play with Sungmin’s emotions. It made her upset that you do that. Sungmin’s love is a drug, whether it be friendship love or romantic, nobody can get enough of it.
All this stressed her out to her max. Her family being hurt because of her, her mom unable to walk for the next few weeks is all because of her. Only cause she cannot complete this task she brought onto herself. As if being in danger because of Won-Shik and Bangtan wasn’t enough beforehand, she just made things worse all in all. There is no way out of this for her and her family. So it’s time to just accept it and say goodbye to it all and start a new life.
“ I’ll find her. You wait at the base and I’ll report back to you guys after I find her. When I do, you will come and finish your damn task Namjoon. Do you hear me?” Jungkook’s beyond pissed at this point. If it wasn’t for him, the boys would be lost as fuck without him.
He shoots Casper a text, letting him know that he is to follow him closely as he searches for her. To his luck, Casper was already outside his apartment building in his car. Not long after he pops those contacts in and changes his outfit again, he’s cruising the streets of Seoul in his midnight purple lamborghini.
The pain in his shoulder throbs with each turn he has to make with the wheel of his car. A little pain medicine would of helped beforehand, but rushing to get this shit over with was more important. This bitch definately has it coming. It’s been taking Jungkook these past few days to not just up and kill her. No that would just be too easy. Torture and marinating her to lose her shit at the last minute is something so satisfying to him.
The streets of Seoul soon end behind him and the Mappo Bridge comes into view. It had been an a whole hour searching around the areas of where she could’ve been, including where she was last seen. No sights of her at all. She’s good at this for sure. Text messages are sent back and forth between the boys and Jungkook. They’re all on edge, tired, and frustrated at this chasing game that they’re all playing.
He’d almost missed it. The body walking alongside the side-walk of the bridge with their head hanging low and hoodie on. It’s the hoodie of his school, but most importantly it has their class graduation year on it. It has to be her. Jungkook flashes his hazard lights on, letting Casper know to pull over with him.
It’s now or never.
After sending the text to Namjoon, he’s out the car and jogging towards the suspect. Height, body type, and shoes match the alleged identity. It seems she’s too into something to notice the extra footsteps behind her. He can’t do anything to her though, it’s not his night.
“ Kang Minlee.”
She stops dead in her tracks as if a ghost had called her name. Frozen, she stands there contemplating on running or staying. If she runs, she’s dead. If she stays, shes dead.
“ You think..” He pauses, grabbing her arm and turning her around to face him. Her face is red from crying and her glasses all fogged up from underneath her mask. For a split second, Jungkook does feel regret.
Killing a classmate of his wasn’t something he’d ideally let happen. But it’s far too late to not have her killed off. “ You think that running away is the best option?”
Minlee trembles underneath his grip, “ I made a mistake. Please just let me go. Let me and my family go and we’ll leave you alone forever.” She breaks down into tears, placing her hand over his in attempt to let her go.
It didn’t hurt Jungkook to see her like this. All in all it just feels weird to him. Weird to have one of his classmates begging for her life to be spared from the gruesome events to come.
“ You know I can’t do that.” It honestly can’t be an option at this point. It’d be better to just continue out her days of hell with her family. “ You came for me, that means you die.”
Finally she jerks her arm back from his still in tears as she starts to back away slowly. Jungkook knew that she wouldn’t run. Not in this case. Letting her cry it out was the best way, hell it’s the only way because Namjoon would be here any minute to brand her. It would mean she belonged to Bangtan after that, and she’d have to keep quiet as they planned out her death.
Her sudden movement from the ground to climbing up the railing of the bridge alarms Jungkook. She cries louder when Jungkook comes closer to getting her down so he stops. Suicide? Right now? What happened to being all big and bold? It confuses Jungkook as to why she would take her own life right now. Either way she’d still end up dead and unhappy if Bangtan would kill her or she’d kill herself.
“ Jungkook!” She semi-yells, pointing to the direction behind him as another guy approaches them. Just in time, the sound of Namjoon’s car can be heard from afar. He’s getting close.
The guy she’s pointed to is Casper, who’s also alarmed at the fact that she’s close to the edge right now. Jungkook holds his hand up at Casper for him to stop right there and shakes his head, meaning that it’s too risky for Casper to step in right now. Casper nods and Jungkooks turns back to the scene.
“ Don’t you think that I’ve suffered enough? Everyday you guys give me hell. My mom can’t walk because of you guys, and my dad has health issues. You left us in the dust when we needed your support the most! I was almost put up for adoption a year ago because of you!” She sobs, wiping her never ending tears with her hoodie sleeves.
Jungkook doesn’t know what to say, or do. It’s not like him to have sympathy over a rival. It’s just not in him at this very moment.
Minlee continues on, “ Yn? She took what’s mine. My Sungmin. She plays with his heart and it hurts him a lot. I wouldn’t have did that. But no, he’s head over heels in love with him. I got left in the dust when she came along and it looks like everyone loves her, including you Jungkook. My friendgroup does anything and everything she wants because she’s just oh so little miss perfect. That was supposed to be me!”
There it is. The jealousy. Jungkook would have never known it. It’s all news and shock to him. Sungmin and Minlee? Didn’t seem like a match to begin with.
Her dramatic meltdown continues on, but Jungkook allows it. Namjoon will be here any minute to sneakily get her down. Where is he and why the hell is he taking so long?
As if on cue, Namjoon pulls up to the scene and immediately gets out his car running towards the girl. Jungkook waves his hands for him to stop, eyes wide with a finger to his lips. The last thing he wanted was for the girl to jump. A death from their school? Surely was to be put on him and his boys.
Namjoon stops infront of Jungkook’s car, confused as to what’s going on. Jungkook mouthes to him the words suicide attempt. That’s when Namjoon gets it and decides to let him handle getting her down.
“ Yeah it was meant to be you. But I plan to take Yn away anyways. Then you and Sungmin could come together again.” Jungkook’s convincing isn’t convincing enough, she doesn’t buy it at all.
“ If I get down I’m going to die. There is no escaping that within the next few days i’d be dead in your hands. I made a mistake and there is no going back. Spare my parents. Let them live. I’m the one that started this. I’ll be the one to finish it.”
The girl lifts one foot off the railing and leans backwards. Jungkook’s breath hitches along with Namjoons. No. It wasn’t supposed to end like this.
“ Kang Minlee!” They both scream, running towards her. It’s too late though. Her body falls gracefully down as all three of them watch over the railing. She looks peaceful, a smile on her face while her body is sprawled out in the air.
Inches before she hits the water, the three of the boys look away with only the sound of dense water splashing to fill their ears. Namjoon sighs, putting his hands against his head. Jungkook stands there in complete shock. Casper, well Casper just shakes his head knowing the two boys weren’t prepared for that.
“ We fucked up Jungkook.”
“ I fucking know that Namjoon.” His voice cracks. It isn’t like Jungkook to cry. No not at all. Especially for a target like that. At the end of the day she was human and she did what any daughter would do for her family.
She was also your friend.
You hadn’t heard about her death yet the next day. It’s a normal saturday morning for you. This time you’d decided to go to the cafe with your laptop and write your essay for your Psychology class. The cafe is nice, it’s cat themed and has some pretty kittens running around the outside of the kitchen and customer service area.
As soon as you order and sit down with your Caramel frappe you spot a white kitten laying near you on the floor. A smile comes upon your face when it comes to you when you call for it. They don’t have these in Canada. Cat Cafes. The kitten lets out his purrs when you rub his back as he lays across your lap. The nametag says Mochi, a cute name for a cute kitten.
Minutes seem to pass by without your knowledge. You’d been too into typing to hear the news on the tv being broadcasted live. It wasn’t until you heard suicide of a teenage student on Mappo Bridge. That got your attention.
You listen carefully as the news reporter goes into detail of how the body was found. It had gotten caught on a rock as the stream moved it around. A mother had found it with her kid as they walked across the bridge that early morning to look at beautiful water. It saddens you to know someone took their life. Maybe if that person had access to getting help, they’d live to see many more days.
When they announce the name and show a school picture of the student, the look on your face drops.
Minlee. It’s Minlee on the screen. Its all too much for you right now. Your stomach twists and turns along with your hands that begin fidgeting. She seemed so healthy and happy these past few days when you saw her. It didn’t add up. It wasn’t going to ever add up to you that you had just lost one of your new friends.
Packing your things up in a hurry, your phone begins to go off with a bunch of text messages at a time. You know it could be the groupchat. What you wanted to the most right now, is to go home to cry and calm down. You shove everything in your backpack and place the kitten back on the floor nicely before taking off towards the door. You bump into somebody on the way out, causing them to drop a picture in their hand. The two of you both reach to pick it up, but they pick it up first before you.
“ I’m sorr-”
You’ve seen her before. Long curled hair, big dimple on her left cheek, and bangs.
There’s no fucking way.
#desperado#jungkook#jeon jungkook#jungkook fanfic#jungkook oneshot#mafia!bts#mafia!jungkok#mafia bts#mafia jungkook#badboy jungkook#bad boy jungkook#badboy!jungkook#kpop fanfic#kpop scenario#kpop smut#kpop fluff#kpop angst#kpop mafia#jungkook smut#jungkook angst#jungkook fluff#kpop reaction#bts reaction#bts oneshot#bts scenario#bts smut#bts fluff#bts angst#kim namjoon#kim seokjin
183 notes
·
View notes
Text
— lost stars, part 1 (m.)
⟶ pairing: jeon jungkook/reader
⟶ genre: smut, angst, (troubled) idol au, childhood friends to lovers
⟶ word count: 20k
⟶ summary: in dead hours of the night he stumbles upon the bars, reaching, searching, trying to feel something, for once forget about consequences and taste the bittersweet freedom. between sips of addiction and faint touches of nameless lovers he finds you again: his own long-lost star on a blackboard sky.
⟶ warnings for part one: explicit sexual content, dom!jungkook, rough sex, oral (m receiving), fingering, dirty talk, degradation, light breath play, unprotected sex, infidelity, mentions of mental health issues, smoking, drinking etc., this is sad im sorry
⟶ music: lost stars, young god, the hills and more here.
PART TWO (FINALE): HERE!
Jungkook can’t sleep.
Moonlight is gradually slipping through the unveiled curtains that he hasn’t even bothered shutting out for the night, letting the silvery luminescences gleam over the expanses of his room callously. It's the first full moon of the month, an argent king on the cloudless sky preventing many people that particular night from falling asleep.
Jungkook lays on his bed, long body slumped on unmade, messy sheets. Brightness illuminates over his features, making his skin glow in porcelain white. Every edge of him is chiseled. From his thin lips, through the slope of his nose and paleness of his forehead, Jungkook might be a beautiful imitation of a marble sculpture. Although he isn't, heaviness of his limbs and suffocating pressure weighting down on his chest like tons of rocks make him feel like one.
Digital clock on his bedside table reads midnight, four red zeros signaling change of the date. It's so painfully silent in the confines of his room, yet Jungkook doesn't sleep. And it's not because of some scientificly proven theory connecting insomnia to the full moon. He hasn't shifted on his bed since he laid there an hour or so ago. He stares blankly at the ceiling, inhaling the chilly air of March flowing inside through the open window. There is without a doubt too cold to lie uncovered like that, with bare legs and thin t-shirt thrown on, but he doesn't seem to care, not when shivers run down his arms, not when the sudden puff of wind blows the strands of raven hair off from his forehead. He stays like that, hands folded on his stomach, eyes glued to the silver lights on the ceiling, and time ticks.
Jungkook doesn't remember when was the last time he has gotten some good amount of sleep in the night. Perhaps it was a year or two ago, when after particularly hectics days it took him only a few seconds to fall into the peaceful slumber as soon as his cheek met the cool material of his pillow. A lot of has changed since that; it's bitterly oblivious he has changed too. His insomniac tendencies are only a small part of the whole spectrum.
Jungkook doesn't wish the sleep to come and cure him. He has stopped a long time ago, when he realised it's just pointless. There are times when it gets better, when he doesn't need to nap uncontrollably during the day instead of doing that while it's dark out. Tonight seems like one of those dead end situations. Maybe after a few hours his eyes will tire out enough to flutter shut on their own accord and bring him the awaited couple of hours of mindless numbness, and the sun will raise again, as it always does.
However, that night, like many of them before, Jungkook doesn't wait helplessly.
A sigh and a minute later, he kicks off the sheets and stands up from his bed, walking to the nearby closet. He puts on the first pair of black jeans he manages to find and replaces his worn out t-shirt he wears to sleep with a new, fresh one. He flicks the lights on for a brief moment to examine himself briefly in the mirror. He needs haircut, loose strands are falling on his forehead and he swamps them off, running his fingers through the black locks. He looks even more tired in the artificial lighting of his room, definitely not like the marble sculpture, certainly not like the spot-on idol this country loves and admires. The skincare products his stylists have given him to put on his face everyday are doing a quite good job, but not good enough to fully hide the bangs underneath his eyes. This kind of magic only stage makeup can provide.
Now, Jungkook looks painfully ordinary. He isn't Jeon Jungkook of BTS, he doesn't want to be during nights like this one. That's why he fishes out of the drawer his black mask and puts it in the pockets of his denim jacket. There is probably too cold outside to go out dressed like that, but Jungkook doesn't falter.
He doesn't falter opening the door to his room and stepping into the dark hallway of the dorm. He doesn't falter putting on his shoes as silently as he can. He doesn't falter reaching for the knob to the main door and twisting it. Even if he has promised he won't do that again, that the last time when he came home at ungodly hour, smelling of sleazy bars and cheap alcohol, with faint reminiscences of the touches of nameless lovers on his skin, was truly last.
Even if the pang of guilt is still there, at the back of his head, when he exhales the air of the night, it fades away.
If someone ever asked Jeon Jungkook to describe freedom, he would say it smells like Bongcheon Underground Station.
He’s never been there before or at least he doesn’t remember doing it. The sign indicates it’s the line number two, a green one to be more exact. He doesn’t know in which part of the city he is, maybe half an hour away from the luxurious housing estate he lives in with the rest of the boys, maybe further. At some point during the train ride he's lost the track of time.
It’s probably irresponsible, careless, unwise and stupid to be a widely-known figure using public transportation in the middle of the night completely alone, but this run-down underground station in Jungkook's head is his own manifesto of mock freedom, consequences to be damned.
Jungkook knows he's risking a lot right now. The sick thirl is already there, boiling the blood in his veins. This is all he has; the mirage of liberty, his own revolt against the unfairness of the world. His testament of lost youth.
Before someone will see him standing on the platform and staring ahead of himself with blank eyes like a mad man, he decides to walk out of the station.
A young couple around his age passes him on the stairs and he can’t help but spare a glance in their direction. They aren’t aware of his presence, holding onto each other and giggling drunkily. Something squeezes in Jungkook’s chest at the sight. It’s not any kind of jealousy, no. He’s grown up from being a rebel teenager. He’s grown up from the dreams of college parties, going on dates with pretty girls and having late-night snacks with his friends after gaming sessions.
Now Jungkook is just angry. Someone may say he doesn’t have the right to, he has everything an ordinary twenty-two year-old can desire. Yet, Jungkook is the one calling the world unfair while being on top of it.
There is a poster with his face hanging just above the entrance to the station. He stops in his tracks, scoffing cynically. Poster-Jungkook, spot-on idol from the biggest boyband in the country smiles at him, showing a row of blindingly white teeth. He has a face cream in his right hand, the softness of his photoshopped face and boyish glint in the eyes trick thousands of people into buying whatever he recommends.
What would Poster-Jungkook say seeing him now, Jungkook wonders. Barefaced, with mask covering half of his features, ruffled hair that he should have hidden underneath a cap. Poster-Jungkook probably wouldn’t like to make friends with someone like him. Poster-Jungkook is here to sing his heart out, to entertain fans and make his parents proud. Poster-Jungkook has never been at Bongcheon Underground Station.
With one last glance, Jungkook exits the station, stepping into the streets of Seoul.
The clock on his lockscreen reads 1am, Saturday, March 21th. He reaches to his face, pulling the mask down a little to inhale the chilly air. The smell of nearby Chinese restaurant reminds him it’s definitely a terrible idea to drink on an empty stomach but he shrugs off this thought, walking ahead of himself, with no plan in mind.
It’s not everyday he uses underground to travel around the city like most citizens do. Ironically, this mundane thing is a luxury he normally can’t afford. But nighttime has it’s own rules.
Using his car isn’t a debatable option when he knows he's going to distract himself with numerous sips of alcohol later. He cannot use taxi as well. Not when he hates having small talks with middle-aged men while being half-wasted, half-asleep on the backseat, head buzzing, world spinning. In worst case scenarios, the said taxi driver might be a dad of one of his fans.
(Yes, it happened before. It caused a lot for Jungkook's intoxicated brain to make up some silly story and convince the poor man he was coming home from his friend's birthday party, not running away from his one night stand's place.)
Asking one of their personal drivers to lift him up somewhere won’t do any good too because one: it definitely isn’t an emergency situation, although Jungkook would most likely argue it kind of is and two: going out in the night is too risky and most importantly, strictly forbidden for him since the last time Jimin found him unconscious on their doormat.
He wants to laugh at himself, remembering the very first time he tried to sneak out of the dorm without permission.
He was merely eighteen back then and his friend from Busan came to Seoul to celebrate his acceptance into the university. Of course, teenage Jungkook had asked for approval like the well-raised young man he was. That’s impossible, Jungkook, was the answer and I really hadn’t seen that friend for a long time, please, wasn’t enough to change minds and melt hearts. And that was when eighteen-year-old Jungkook decided it was the final straw. He had enough of watching snapshots from his friends, living their teen years to the fullest. He wanted to live too.
He had planned everything in details. Namjoon and Yoongi were at the studio, Hoseok was visiting his family in Gwangju, Seokjin went to sleep early, Jimin and Taehyung were playing video games in their room. All occurrences seemed to be on his side. Until they weren’t.
He announced to everyone he wasn’t feeling well and locked himself inside his room. He waited for the right moment, then opened the door and peeked his head out. It was dead quiet, beside muffled bursts of laughter coming from the other end of the hallway where Taehyung and Jimin were still playing. Holding his breath, Jungkook tiptoed to the entrance.
It felt so electrifying back then, when he took the handle into his hand and pushed, doing something that he wasn’t supposed to. When he found himself taking the cab to his hyung’s place, fingers drumming the unknown rhythm of excitement on his jean-clad thighs.
It doesn’t feel like that anymore. There’s a rush of adrenaline but not the good kind. What was once a silly rebellion of a boy with romantic soul, is now nothing but a routine.
That night didn’t turn out as he wished. It ended with him getting wasted to the point he had to call Seokjin to pick him up. He still remembers the furious scolding the older one gave him. He remembers how he promised it was a one-time thing, how he regretted his childish actions and irresponsibility.
But it happened again and again. And it got only worse over the years.
Jungkook keeps marching ahead of himself, looking around the unfamiliar neighborhood. It's a more industrial part of the city; it doesn’t look like leafy, peaceful area he lives in. He can only imagine how the flats inside those buildings look like - cramped, cluttered. Maybe they look just like their old dorm when he was merely sixteen, with head full of dreams, sleeping every night on a bunk bed underneath Taehyung.
Upon seeing a fluorescent, red neon sign, he stops in his tracks. The club looks nice from the outside and even though it stopped being an indicator for Jungkook some time ago, he decides to step inside with the same goal in mind as usual: get drunk and then leave.
Loud, thumping music fills his ears as soon as he enters the building. He passes the mass of nameless silhouettes, heading straight to the bar and slumping down on one of the stools.
“What can I get you?”
Jungkook looks up, meeting the eyes of friendly-looking bartender who seems not to recognize him or just doesn’t give a fuck. Both options are more than anticipated when you’re a well-know celebrity who decided to get drunk on a Friday night.
“Doesn’t matter. Just give me something strong.”
Bartender nods in understanding and Jungkook sees him reaching for the bottle of whiskey and pouring the substance into a glass already filled with ice cubs.
I don’t even like whiskey, Jungkook realizes. But at the same time he knows he hasn’t come here to sample. He’s here to let loose, to taste the bittersweet freedom this umber alcohol provides and represents. Each sip burns his throat stronger, yet it’s always welcomed.
After the third glass, his head starts buzzing. The world spins a little when he closes his eyes; everything becomes a blurr of colors, shapes and sounds. It’s should be a sign to slow down but Jungkook automatically raises his hand to bartender, ordering another glass.
He hasn’t even registered he’s not alone by the bar anymore.
She’s pretty. Maybe not exactly his type, whether he has one or not, but he can’t help but spare a glance anyway. Even in his drunken state he notices she’s a foreigner; blonde locks are cascading down her back and shoulders, milky skin glowing in the fluorescent lights. He doesn’t see her face clearly yet, but he observes in the corner of his eye as she bites her plump, cherry-coloured lips, while staring down at her empty glass.
Then, his eyes wander lower, to the smooth column of her throat, her provident collarbones and rich décolltage. Her black dress doesn’t do quite good job covering her cleavage and Jungkook has to swallow at the sight.
He’s fucked, buzzed and that irritating, tiny voice at the back of his head is telling him to get his shit together but every rational thought is wiped off his mind when the girl whirls around and faces him fully now. She smiles at him, or his blurry eyes are deceiving him already. Nevertheless, he smiles back at her dumbly, doing his best to maintain the enigmatic façade.
“Hi.” he says.
It’s not the first time he’s hitting on a foreign woman. It’s very much asshole of him, but he thinks it’s easier to get laid that way. In most cases he’s not the one to start a conversation, yet this time, here he is.
“Hi, stranger.” she answers and licks her lips languidly. The raw eroticism dripping from it makes Jungkook shift on his seat. If she wants to play this game, he’s ready to make another move.
“Can I buy you a drink?” he asks. It’s so goddamn blunt and brusque, but always works. Something about his flat English and the way he subtly smirks saying it makes women intrigued.
She contemplates for a moment, batting her eyelashes at him until she eventually agrees. “Yes, sure.”
He waves at the bartender, slurring his words a little. He hears the girl giggle and somehow, his next words leave his lips without a second thought.
“You like Korea?”
She’s very talkative when she’s drinking, Jungkook notices. The question seemed to elicit something in her and she started babbling, spitting her words so fast he couldn’t catch up even if he wasn’t drunk (and knew English better). All this time he smiles at her, nodding his head and occasionally muttering “yeah” and “oh” whenever he feels like it’s the right moment.
At some point his eyes wander to the other part of the club, where the sign shows the way to the bathroom. The girl takes a sip of her drink, showing a row of her perfectly white teeth when she catches him staring at her. And at this moment, Jungkook decides is time to interfere.
He leans closer to her, his hand ever so slightly brushing the place where the material of her dress meets her thigh. She bites her lip, waiting for his another move. Jungkook is now mere inches from her face, lust swimming in his orbs when he whispers, “You’re so beautiful.”
She says something to him but he doesn’t register it. His hand is now fully placed on her thigh and when he opens his mouth to ask if she would like to dance with him, he feels a pair of strong hands placed firmly on his shoulders, pulling him away from her.
“What the fuck, man? What are you doing with my girlfriend?” He hears a male voice saying behind him in English.
Jungkook blinks, trying to comprehend what have just happened. His head spins from the sudden motion and he feels like throwing up any second. He lifts his head, meeting the terrified expression of the girl he talked to just seconds ago.
“Are you deaf or something? I’m talking to you.”
Someone pushes him forcefully again and that’s when he turns around with reluctance, standing face to face with very much pissed off white guy. He’s taller than him and the deep furrow of his brows tells Jungkook he’s in for a trouble.
“James, it’s okay. We were just talking.”
“Well, it didn’t look like that!”
“Just let him be. He’s drunk.”
Jungkook feels like his soul has left his body and now he’s staring at the whole scene from the side. The muffled voices reach his ears but he cannot fathom anything. He pinches the bridge of his nose and squeezes his eyes.
Another shove at his shoulder coerces him to regain his senses a little.
“I’m not letting that fucker go that easily until he apologies. Hey, shithead!”
Jungkook feels hands grabbing him by the lapels of his jacket. And then, when he thinks this is it – Jeon Jungkook of BTS is going to get hammered in some sleazy club by a foreigner because he couldn’t keep his hands to himself, because he’s useless peace of shit instead of the It Boy of his country, everything stops.
He knows this voice. Maybe his drunken brain is deceiving him, maybe he’s hallucinating or dreaming because he’s already lying bruised on the floor and unconscious. But he hears you and feels you, touching his arm and saying, “It’s alright, sir, he’s here with me. He doesn’t feel well. I apologize for his behavior.”
Your grip is stronger than he remembers to be. It hurts like you’re mad at him. But is it really you, dragging him across the room, away from those people through the crowd of sweaty bodies? He squints his eyes, focusing them on your silhouette, but what he sees is merely a blurry sideprofile of a young woman.
“I can’t believe the first thing I do after not seeing you for three years straight is saving your ass.”
There’s a wave of fresh air hitting his face. He inhales it greedily, hands extending to stabilize himself until he feels the rough texture underneath fingertips. He leans his head on the wall, eyes squeezed shut. Seconds pass, maybe even minutes, until something nudges him on the side.
“Do you feel better now?”
To be completely frank, Jungkook is scared to open his eyes. His sanity is slowly coming back to him and he hears you now loud and clearly. Maybe he’s really dreaming but if that’s true, why does he feel like he has a full control on his next move?
It’s really you. Three years older than he last saw you, arms crossed over your chest and evident frown on your face. He doesn’t know why but he wants to smooth the crease between your brows. It doesn’t suit you. Your hair is shorter, your features sharper and more mature.
You’re definitely not dream-__. His dream-___ would have scratches on her knees and some fantasy book in her hands. She sometimes visits him at dead hours of the night, asking why he hasn’t answered her calls and messages. Sometimes she stares at him from the photograph he carries in his wallet because he cannot bring himself to get rid of it.
He probably should hug you, run into your arms and thank for saving his reputation. He should hug you because it’s been three goddamn years and you were his best friend once. One of the most important people in his life, his partner in crime (and professional math tutor in primary school). God, you were his first, silly crush when you were merely ten, hair braided and pimples on your cheeks. His shoulder to lean on when he needed to cry. The girl who played football with him because there was no boys in your neighborhood with whom he could do it.
Instead, he asks, “Did you cut your hair?”
The first thing you do is raise your eyebrows, as if you’re genuinely confused he’s able to form full, coherent sentences. Next, you scoff. “Seriously? We meet for the first time in three years in a club where I work because I need to save your ass since you’re completely pissed and tried hooking up with taken woman, and that’s the only thing you have to say?”
He doesn’t like how you sound already. Your tone matches your expression, stern and slightly irritated. But at the same time, he’s not surprised you’re acting like this.
“I’m sorry, I’m just…” he hesitates. He’s just what? Pathetic? Stupid? Reckless? Or maybe–
“Crazy?”
He smiles sheepishly. “Yeah. That’s a good word.”
You take a step closer, standing right in front of him. “So are you going to tell me what are you doing in this part of the city, getting drunk while being a freaking idol?”
“Isn’t it what all celebrities do?” he asks sardonically.
You roll your eyes at that, and he takes a moment to look at you more carefully now. Your cheeks are rosy from the cold and he notices a smudge of mascara underneath your left eye. And there’s another thing he remembers about you; the weird habit of staring at him intensely whenever he wasn’t aware because you were terrible at keeping eye contact.
But it seems like a lot of has changed in that department and now you’re meeting his eyes without a hint of shyness.
“Yeah, maybe they do. But not when they have a reputation to take care of.” you counter.
Jungkook sighs, closing his eyes for a second. It’s still hard for him to produce logical thoughts but he knows he’s slowly sobering, the chilly air clearing his mind. You hug your coat tighter against your body and he wonders for a moment if it’s really that cold outside and he just doesn’t feel it because of the alcohol swimming in his veins.
He’s not capable of having this kind of conversation with you under those circumstances. While you’re outside of some niche club in a part of the city he doesn’t know, reunited after three years of silence.
You have that look on your face, the one you used to wear every time he got on your nerves and he was in for good scolding. His head pounds too much to bare with it now.
He needs to smoke a cigarette.
He fishes a pack, placing one between his lips. He feels your eyes on him the entire time and after taking the first drag, he offers you to light up one as well.
“I quit.” you say curtly.
“Okay.” The smoke swirls around his features and you take a step back, cringing. You never really could stand the smell.
“Is smoking even allowed for you?”
He snickers, shaking his head. It’s funny, how you’re asking him this now, when you were the one he used to smoke occasionally with at the docks every time he visisted Busan. Eighteen, listening to Arctic Monkeys and Coldplay on his old iPhone and watching the sky burning when sun was hiding behind the horizon.
Jungkook smirks. “Out of sight, out of mind.”
As a matter of fact, he doesn’t smoke often. It’s more like a sporadic trespass when he’s out for the night than a regular craving. Leaving aside his favor for cigarettes, he shouldn’t let himself become addicted, not when it might easily influence his lungs capacity. And Jeon Jungkook's velvet voice can’t have a hoarseness to it.
“So, you work here?” he opts to ask you, avoiding the set of questions probably already itching to leave your mouth all at once.
“I do. I actually ended my shift few minutes ago. I had some work to do at the storage room and when I walked out, I saw that guy ready to beat the shit out of you,” you say, grimacing. “To be honest, I didn’t recognize you at first. You looked… different.”
“I guess that’s what they call the magic of stage make-up.” he jokes but his comment doesn’t make you laugh. If anything, you look even more puzzled.
Then, his phone buzzes in the pocket of his jacket. He pulls it out just to be met with tens of notifications, mainly texts and unanswered calls from Jimin. He must have found out somehow he’s been gone.
“Fuck.” Jungkook mutters under his breath, locking his phone.
“Something’s wrong?” You always could read him like an open book. He wasn’t very talkative kid back then and you, somehow, found a way to communicate with him on non-verbal level.
Jungkook scratches the back of his head, smiling lopsidededly. “You’re going to laugh at me,” he sighs.
“No, I’m not.” you promise. There’s sincerity in your voice but he knows better. You’re definitely going to.
“I’m scared to come home.” Jungkook says, entirely serious. His doe eyes widen for emphasis and you’re sure he’s shitting you yet you decide to play along.
“And why is that?”
He leans closer, smelling of cigarettes and his musky cologne and you almost wince. “Because I’m gonna have my ass whipped.”
He waits a moment, and then breaks into a grin. It’s his drunkiness still speaking through him and maybe a tiny bit of curiosity how you were going to react.
You snort loudly. “That was terrible.”
“You smiled. I saw the cornes of your mouth moving.”
“You’re wasted, Jungkook. I’m surprised you’re standing on your own feet right now,” He pouts and you sigh, shaking your head. “So are you going to tell me what is it really about?” you ask.
He shrugs, blowing out the fume from his cigarette. “I just don’t wanna go home drunk. It will be worse than coming back in the morning, believe me. I’ve been there before.”
Something flashes across your face hearing his last sentence but it quickly disappears, replaced by your usual, unreadable expression. You seem to think about what he has said, until you exhale loudly, making him look at you with raised eyebrows.
“Fine. You can crash at mine.”
Jungkook knows he might have misheard you. But you’re still staring at him as if you’re waiting for him to respond. He feels dumbfounded.
“What?”
“I saved your ass today once, I can do it again. That’s what friends are for, right?”
He hates how bitter it sounds coming from you. He knows it’s very much what he deserves. You don’t own him anything after all he’s done to you yet here you are. Offering him help even though you don’t have to do anything.
You’ve always been too good for him.
You cock your head at him, a small smile dancing on your features he wishes was genuine. Maybe you still have a sentiment for him, after all. “You coming?” It’s what you ask, and he tosses the half-burnt cigarette, following you without a word.
And that’s how your story starts again, with reckless decision, cigarettes and underground stations.
Ironically, Jungkook ends up at the Bongcheon Underground Station for the second time that night.
You led him wordlessly out of the building, taking a turn into direction he was familiar with. On the whole ride back to your home, you were silent. You didn’t utter a sentence to him, even when you reached your stop, you just stood up from the seat and he followed you like a lost puppy.
Walking from the station to your flat, Jungkook decided he’s had enough of this awkward silence, breaking it first.
“So, how have you been?”
It’s such a stupid question to ask someone you haven’t talked to for such a long period of time. Of course you can’t catch up all that have happened in last three years during ten minutes-long walk. Jungkook bites his lip, peeking at your side profile.
“It’s actually funny you’re asking this now. I’ve been good, and you? Or actually… wait! You don’t have to answer that because I know you’ve been good too, thanks to your mum who is updating mine about everything what’s going on in your life,” you say sarkily. “Oh, not to mention I also have Internet and it’s really hard to avoid news about nation’s favourite boy group, right?”
Your harsh words make him grimace. He knows he fucked up royally and your bitter attitude towards him is the effect of his wrong doings. Yet, he can’t help but feel a little bit irritated.
“You know I’m sorry.” he mutters under his breath.
“Oh, are you? Was it really that hard to call an old friend once in a month?”
Jungkook looks up at the sky, as if he was wishing it could give him strenght and fill his mouth with words that will make your stony façade break just a little. “I was busy,” he answers, regretting it as soon as it slipped of his tongue.
He hears you scowl. “Busy? Doing what? Drinking and hooking up with women?”
Now it’s his turn to roll his eyes. “Are you really patronizing me right now? We just came across each other and I’m trying to be civil here. We’re not thirteen anymore, loose up.”
You stop in your tracks abruptly. “I see. You don’t need my help anymore and you’re okay with sleeping under the bridge, fine.” you spit and turn your back on him, quickening your pace.
“What? Wait!” Jungkook calls after you because one: you might be not joking and two: he’s too startled to react in time and now he has to jog up to you. “You aren’t serious, right?” he asks after catching up with your hurried movements.
You sigh, taking another turn. “God, I can’t believe you’re still that childish.”
Jungkook frowns. “What does that suppose to mean?”
“You know damn right what I mean.”
You’re now walking through a typical, industrial looking neighborhood. He used to live with other boys in an area like this, back when their name meant nothing to the world and industry, when you used to talk practically every single day on the phone.
Suddenly, you stop in front of one of the buildings, digging in your purse and pulling out the keys.
Jungkook silently follows your figure when you enter the tenement house you’re living in. He squints his eyes, trying to remember the street name and building number. For some reason he feels like this information might be useful for him sometime in the future.
You quickly climb up the stairs until you reach the forth floor, Jungkook running out of breath with mouth hang open, and that’s when you turn around to face him.
You don’t say anything to him. You just stare, expression stern yet unreadable at the same time. Your gaze is challenging but eventually you give up, sighing and opening the door to your flat, letting him in.
The first thing he notices is that your flat is tiny.
There’s barely enough space for one person in the hallway when you hang up your coat without a word, bumping into his unmoving figure when you’re trying to walk into what is probably the smallest kitchen he has ever seen.
You pour yourself a glass of water, chugging it greedily while he still stands dumbly three meters away from you, fully dressed, unsure of what to do.
He jumps, hearing you put the glass on the counter loudly. “So, welcome in my humble abode, I guess,” you say. “Are you going to stand there the whole night?” You cock your head into his direction and Jungkook shakes his head, shrugging off his jacket and kicking off his shoes.
“I know it’s small but the rent is cheap,” you add, referencing to the size of your apartment. You don’t need to explain, he wants to tell you but he doesn’t. Instead, his eyes wander to the other part of the flat where your bedroom is, as he assumes.
“Ah, yes, that’s my bedroom. And living room, and bureau,” you confirm, voice laced with apparent sarcasm. “Make yourself comfortable.”
Jungkook hesitantly enters the room. There’s nothing much there beside your bed, wardrobe and a small desk with your laptop and other belongings on. One thing he realises is that you keep everything clean and tidy, despite the limited space you have here.
“But the view is nice, isn’t it?” you ask suddenly, startling him a little. Jungkook, encouraged by you, glances out of the window and he has to admit that yes, indeed, the view is beautiful. You can see the city quite clearly from the forth floor. “I’m still surprised when I look out of the window and see rooftops instead of brick walls. I guess I’m kind of lucky.” you chuckle.
That’s when he realises just how much more you deserve than you have. It hits him how privileged he is now, living in a luxurious area for rich snobs and celebrities who look out of their windows and see green hills. And one more time, his anger for the unfairness of this world only boils stronger in his veins.
“I gotta go the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”
You leave him alone again, and now he has an opportunity to look at the corkboard you have above your desk. There is plenty of photos and polaroids pinned to it and he finds himself examining them without a second thought.
It seems like you have them organized chronologically. They start with you as a little kid standing in front of your house in Busan, front teeth missing and clutching your favourite doll. Next, you’re in school and surprisingly, he finds himself present on most of these photos along with you. Playing football at the backyard, eating ice cream at your favourite parlor (he has smudges of chocolate on his chin but he smiles to the camera like it means nothing). He recognizes a photo he took of you when you where in middle school, dressed as Anne Boleyn for some history project he doesn’t remember what was exactly about.
As years pass on your polaroid timeline, his face is slowly disappearing from your captured memories. He smiles when he sees his favourite photo of you, the one he also carries snuggled deeply in his wallet. It was taken by your mum on your seventeenth birthday. You went on a picnic by the sea and Jungkook surprised you with an unexpected visit, coming home back from Seoul. He gifted you a bracelet bought with the first money he had earned in his life.
He wonders now if you still have that bracelet somewhere, hidden among many other things reminding you of your past together, just like the creased photo in his wallet he still hasn’t thrown away.
Then, Jungkook eyes land on the most recent picture. You’re grinning to the camera while being hugged from the back by a man he doesn’t know. He presses his lips to your cheek in a fleeting kiss. An affectionate one.
“I see you’re enjoying yourself.”
Jungkook jolts a little hearing your voice. You come up to him and he notices you have changed your clothes for something looking much more comfier. “Remember this one?” you ask, pointing at the photo of you sitting on a beach next to the sand castle you built.
Jungkook smiles apologetically. “Yeah.”
“Ten seconds after taking this photo, you decided to ruin my sand castle and made my cry.”
He can’t help but share your grin when your eyes lock. There’s the same sympathy in them he’s grown to known. It feels familiar, almost domestic. He likes it.
“So,” He nudges your side, pointing with his chin at the corkboard, “care to tell me who is this guy?” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively and you roll your eyes in response at his antics.
“That’s my boyfriend Minho.” you answer.
Jungkook doesn’t know why but for some reason, he feels uneasy now. He’s mad at himself he’s been really missing out what’s going on in your life. He shakes off these thoughts quickly though, mastering an amusing attitude.
“That was a very poor introduction, ma’am. Come on, you can do better than this. Tell me more about him.” he teases, making you sigh loudly.
“Minho is five years older than me. He’s working as a police officer. We’ve been together for almost a year. Are you happy now?” you grumble.
Jungkook smirks. “Very much.”
“He doesn’t sleep over here so I don’t have any of his clothes you can change into,” you add awkwardly.
He furrows his eyebrows. What are you talking about now?
You shift on your feet, turning to face him properly and now he realises why did you say it. The clothes you have on are actually your pyjamas. Right, it’s almost two. You’re probably sleepy after your night shift and he’s keeping you up. And you’re kindly reminding him it’s time for him to rest as well.
“It’s okay, I can sleep naked.” Jungkook says. Your eyes widen almost comically at that. “Relax, love. I’ll stay with my boxers on. Unless you want to see my without them.” He raises a single brow in question.
You grimace. “Jesus, Jungkook, you’re still drunk. Go take a shower. You can use the blue toothbrush and white towel.” You slump down on your bed and he leaves the room without another word.
Jungkook has been in many bathrooms in his life but yours can only be describe as microscopic.
He feels almost claustrophobic when he’s standing underneath your shower. The water is splashing on everything and he panicks for a moment if you will be angry at him for the mess but then he realises it’s practically impossible to keep everything around dry when he’s showering without any curtain or glass door around him.
He uses your shampoo and body wash, cleaning himself as fast as possible. They smell nice, flowery and exotic and somehow like you. Quick shower definitely has drained him from most alcohol he has in his system. He can now think through the situation he’s in with clear mind.
After drying himself up and putting on his boxers, he stands in front your sink. He wipes off the moist on the small mirror, just to be met with his blank, tired eyes staring back at him. He really should use some good sleep. He uses the blue toothbrush just like you told him to and in the middle of the second round of brushing, he chuckles to himself at the surrealism of this whole situation.
He’s met you for the first time in three years after not speaking to you at all. You don’t own him anything and here he is, already having enormous, unpayable debt because you saved his life from the embarrassment and possible scandal.
You were always like this, ready to put on your superhero cape and save him. Just like years ago when you stood up from your seat in math class and told the teacher you didn’t feel well right before she was about to check his homework, or rather the lack of it which was going to result in another low grade on his account. You, scaring off his fifth grade bullies. You, paring up with him for every school project and doing most of the work selflessly and without a word of complaint because you’ve always liked working alone.
Jungkook spits the rest of the toothpaste and water mixed together to the sink and splashes his face. He really doesn’t know why he deserves you.
The question is simple. He doesn’t. Not after being a total prick to you. But in some strange way, you took him back again, like nothing ever happened.
When he exits the bathroom, he sees you kneeling on the floor and putting a bunch of pillows on the carpet that lies next to your bed.
Jungkook frowns. “What are you doing?”
You look up at him. Your eyes widen visibly when they land on his exposed chest but you quickly compose yourself. “What does it look like? I’m setting up a bed for you.” you reply, patting the pillows, still refusing to meet his stare.
“Am I not going to sleep with you on the bed? We slept together before and it wasn’t a problem then,” he says with furrowed brows.
“Are you kidding? My bed is for one person only! And you’re… you’re–“
“I’m what?”
“You’re big! Bigger than you used to be.” you breathe out, standing up from your kneeling position and sitting on the bed instead. There’s a tingle of barely noticeable rednees on the apples of your cheeks and he fights an urge to tickle your sides just to see you trying not to break into laughter so he could get away with your stubbornness.
“Okay, Miss Grumpy,” he grumbles, kneeling on his make-shift bed. Upon hearing that, you freeze on your spot and then he realises what he has just done.
He called you the old nickname he’s made for you. He hasn’t done that in years.
You bite your lip, acting as if it hasn’t affected you even the slightest. Clearing your throat, you reach for the lamp on your bedside table and switch it off.
Twenty minutes after that, Jungkook finds himself lying on his back in complete silence and staring at the ceiling. You have a few fluorescent stars attached to it, the ones that shine when it’s dark. You had probably ten dozens of them in your old room in Busan, too. A whole constellation.
Jungkook won’t lie, it is a little uncomfortable to sleep on the floor. He tells himself he’s fine with that, though. It’s what he deserves for being an absolute asshole to you. The sleep will come eventually.
Another minutes pass and he’s still very much awake. Then, Jungkook thinks ‘fuck it’ and decides to shoot his shot.
“___?”
You hum sleepily in response after a short while. “Yeah?”
“I cannot sleep.”
“Not my fault.”
He bites his lip. “Can I sleep with you?”
“Jungkook…”
“Pretty please?”
There’s a long pause before you say, “Fine.”
He hears you shifting on the mattress, making a room for him. The bed creaks under his weight when he places himself right next you, back to your back. He wonders if he isn’t squishing you to the wall right now.
“Are you okay?” he asks, just to be sure.
Your comforter ruffles when you try to move but there’s no use for it, not when he’s practically pressed flush to you. “Yeah. I’m good. You’re just really hot.”
“Thanks, love. No need to flutter me like that.” Jungkook murmurs, a hint of smug smile on his lips you cannot see.
“I was taking about four freaking body temperature!”
“It’s okay. You don’t have to pretend you didn’t mean it.”
“Go to sleep, Jungkook.”
There’s mute between you for a while. Nothing but deep exhales and inhales and occasional sounds of cars or wind coming from outside of your window.
It’s been really a long time since he’s slept in the same bed with other person. He's not the type to stay over after casual fuck, he’s never done that. But when he lies next to you, he can’t help but longe for someone to just hold him; nothing more, nothing less. He wonders what would you do if he turned around and snuggled into your backside. Would you yell at him? Kick him out?
But you used to be so close together once. He won’t find out unless he tries.
Carefully, with limited space, he changes his position, mattress protesting under his weight but he rolls to his other side anyway, until he’s facing your back. He feels your body tensing a little when his breath fans over your neck but you don’t say anything, letting him cuddle up to you.
It feels intimate this way, perhaps even too intimate for both yours and his liking but Jungkook can’t help but relish in your close proximity. When he senses you’ve relaxed a little, he shuts his eyes tightly.
“___?” he murmurs. It's barely a whisper but you heard him loud and clear.
“Mhm?”
“I’m sorry for ruining our friendship like that.”
You’re silent for a moment and he thinks you might have fallen asleep but then, you let out a long sigh that sounds awfully audible in the small space of your bedroom. “You still have time to fix this, Jungkookie.”
You haven’t called him that in three years. It’s good to hear that again.
He smiles to himself, burying his face in the crook of your neck. You don’t protest. If anything, he feels you breathe out with relief.
Next morning you wake up feeling like the temperature in your room has risen to fifty degrees. You’re still wrapped tightly in your comforter and facing the wall, which means you haven’t moved even an inch in your sleep. The cause of it being a very much large, male body practically crushing you with its weight.
You let out a shaky exhale. Jungkook’s front is not only pressed flush to your back but somehow, his muscular leg is thrown over yours, successfully trapping you in.
You wiggle, trying to free yourself from his hold but when you hear his quiet groan, you abruptly stop your movements. And then, you feel it. An apparent hardness poking your backside.
You can’t help but blush, reminding yourself not to make this situation even more awkward than it already is. It happens sometimes, you tell yourself, it’s completely normal for men to pop a boner when they’re in such close, intimate position with another warm body.
But when you feel Jungkook unconsciously seeking friction and pressing himself even firmer against your bottom, you can’t help but yelp in response, throwing off the material covering your body and elbowing Jungkook's unsuspecting face in process.
“Fuck! What time is it?” he mumbles groggily, narrowing his eyes when they’re met for the first time with the sunlight gradually slipping through your unveiled curtains.
“Quarter past your dick poking my ass!”
Jungkook furrows his brows but when his eyes land on his crotch, he smiles sheepishly at you. “I’m sorry,” he mutters. “It’s just been a really long time since I slept next to someone like that.” His cheeks are flushed in pink and he rubs the back of his head in a bashful manner.
“What about your one night stands then?” you can’t help but ask.
He shrugs in response. “I never stay over.”
“Oh.” You don’t even know why you’re strangely surprised. Maybe it comes from the fact that you’ve always pegged Jungkook to be the rather romantic type. People change, they say. Or sometimes your assumptions about someone you thought you know like the back of your hand happen to be wrong.
You clear your throat. “Anyway, get up. It’s time for breakfast.” you say and disappear from his sight but he still hears you fumbling in the kitchen, popping the kettle on.
He raises from the bed with reluctance, bending to lift the puddle of his clothes he left on the floor last night.
“Hey, what do you want to–“ you begin but your voice involuntarily trails off, seeing him in rather exposed state now in broad daylight. “–to drink?” you finish almost breathlessly.
You’ve been aware Jungkook's good looking. He’s started attending gym long before you stopped keeping in touch with each other. You just didn’t know he is that ripped. It’s not a surprise that his fans go nuts every time they see even a small glimpse of his muscles.
You really shouldn’t be staring but it’s too late when you see a sly smirk on his face. “Like what you see, buttercup?” he asks like the cocky bastard you didn’t know he’s capable of being. “I would like a black coffee, please.” he adds.
There’s a roll of your eyes in response to his teasing tone. “Oh, stop with these nicknames.”
Jungkook grins. “Why? Hyung used to call you that and you blushed every time.”
“Because I had the biggest crush on your brother when I was eleven, dumbass.” you scoff, shaking your head. You leave him, heading back to the kitchen to finish preparing food.
“I know you had a crush on him,” Jungkook shouts after you, putting on his pants and t-shirt. “I’m just curious why him, not me.”
“Seriously? You had emo fringe and pimples back then!”
He laughs, making his way to the kitchen where you’re standing by the counter and mixing something on the frying pan.
“Hope you don’t mind eating scrambled eggs,” you say, sparing him a quick glance. “It’s probably the only edible thing in my fridge right now beside instant ramen.”
Jungkook settles himself on the stool by the small, wooden table situated right by the window. This time, the view is a greish wall of another building. He takes the coffe cup from you and adds a generous spoon of sugar. “I don’t mind. It smells really nice.” he answers, calming your concerns. “So, am I not crushable in your eyes?” He takes a sip of his drink, peeking at you curiously.
You take out the plates from the cabinet and start putting the food you’ve prepared on them. “What kind of word ‘crushable’ even is? Beside, you have millions of fans gushing over you, I’m unnecessary in this equation.” you say, placing the plate in front of him.
“But you aren’t saying no,” he counters.
“Jungkook.”
“I know, I know,” he chuckles. “I’m just teasing you.”
You look at him then, observing thoroughly for the first time since you saw him last night. He’s indeed handsome, there’s not a hint of doubt about that. His features are more mature, the baby fat on his cheeks gone and replaced with chiseled jawline. But if there’s one thing which stays the same, it’s his eyes. Still gleaming with misheviousness when he laughs and holding starry skies in them when he’s astounded by something.
“Didn’t know you were such a great cook, ___,” Jungkook’s voice brings you back to the reality. He sends you thumbs up with his mouth full and you can’t help but crack a smile at his goofiness. Old habits die hard, they say. “Aren’t you eating?” he asks, staring at you with wide eyes.
You glance at your untouched eggs and opt for taking a sip of coffee instead. “I’m not that hungry.” you respond. He shrugs his shoulders at that, taking a bite of the toast.
You nip the inside of your cheek, hesitating, before asking him a question that have been sitting on the tip of your tongue since last night. “What are you going to tell the rest of the guys when you come home?”
Jungkook's expression immadietly shifts after registering your question. “The truth.” he says like it’s the simplest thing in the world.
You don’t even try to hide your puzzlement, repeting after him, “The truth?” in bewildered tone.
“They aren’t going to buy that anyway. But believe me, it’s better if I came back in the middle of the night completely wasted.”
Something’s telling you not to dread that conversation longer so you don’t press him about it any further, instead focusing on changing a topic. “Do you have anything planned for the rest of the day?”
He nods, swallowing. “We have a dance practice later.”
You raise your eyebrows. “New comeback?” you smile teasingly and he sends you a wink.
“That’s a secret I’ll never tell.”
“Oh, come on. You know I can keep my mouth shut,” you pout.
He rolls his eyes at first but then a small smile appears on his lips. “I know you can. You’ve been covering for me in school all the time.” he murmurs. At that, something warm spreads in your chest. “Come on, buttercup, I’m not spilling anything until you start eating.” he warns, pointing at your untouched food.
When you grin at him and he reciprocates the gesture, it feels like you’ve turned back the time.
“And... five, six, seven, eight!”
Jungkook doesn’t know how many times he has repeated the same sequence of movements but he feels like passing out anytime soon. He asked Hoseok to help him practice but it looks like his older friend is in rather bad mood today and he seems to lose patience even quicker.
“...and spin–no! Jungkook, you’re not supposed to do it like that.” Hoseok sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.
Jungkook grimaces, collapsing on the floor. “Give me a few moments, hyung. I’ll do better, I promise.” he mutters.
Hoseok crunches down next to him for a moment, patting him on the shoulder reassuringly. “You did good, Kook-ah. We can call it quits for today.” he says.
Jungkook doesn’t even have strength to answer him verbally. Instead, he shuts his eyes tightly and nods. He hears Hoseok walking away and talking in the distance with Namjoon about something.
“Are you okay?”
Jungkook cracks an eye open. It’s Jimin this time. He kneels on the floor, observing him with worried look on his face.
“Yeah. Just need a minute to catch a breath.” Jungkook responds.
Jimin nods but Jungkook knows him well enough to sense that there’s another question at the tip of his friend's tongue. And he’s not wrong.
“Jungkook, you know you should stop doing that.”
Jungkook sits up, turning his head in Jimin's direction, eyes narrowed into slits. “What, hyung?” he asks, not hiding is irritation. He’s heard it too many times not to feel it already blubbering inside his chest.
“You know exactly what I mean. Partying, getting drunk, sleeping around like a–“ Jimin stops himself in time, seeing Jungkook's expression.
“Like who?” Jungkook scowls. “Come on, hyung, end the sentence.”
Jimin shakes his head. “It doesn’t matter. I’m just worried about you. We all are.” He puts his hand on Jungkook's shoulder and squeezes.
“No need to. Besides, you’re the last one to lecture me about smart life choices.” Jungkook spats harshly and gets up, leaving Jimin staring at his disappearing figure with defeated expression.
Back in the confines of his room, Jungkook finds himself lying on his bed again. At some point, his thoughts wander back to you. He had to leave your flat quicker than he wanted because of the scheduled practice (and the hint of guilt he felt for his hyungs).
He wonders if you can still be friends together, just like the old times. He needs it. Needs you by his side. He didn’t even know he’s been craving it unconsciously. But then he realises he didn’t even ask for your phone number. Maybe you still have the same one?
He reaches for his phone and unlocks it, searching through his contacts. He has you saved under ‘Miss Grumpy'. It makes him smile involuntarily. His thumbs hover over the screen before he starts typing.
[21:08pm] me:
hi, it’s me Jungkook. I don’t know if that’s still your number but I decided to give it a try. I wanted to say thank you once again for yesterday. and today’s breakfast.
Few minutes later, his phone buzzes.
[21:11pm] Miss Grumpy:
you’re welcome, buttercup
Seven days later, Jungkook is at Bongcheon Underground Station again. This time, it’s not his recklessness and cynicism that led him here. He climbs up the stairs and walk into the half-asleep streets with purpose in his mind.
He remembers exactly the path to the club you’re working in. Now he can only hope you have a shift tonight as well.
You haven’t talked a whole week. He felt too insecure and scared to call or text you. What if you don’t want him to keep in touch? What if your last meeting and sleepover at your flat was just a favor for old times’ sake?
That’s why he needs to see you in person. He thought about visiting you in your flat but his intoxicated brain betrayed him and he couldn’t recall your address even if he tried and he did, sitting in front of his laptop and wandering through the streets on Google maps.
When he enters the club he’s met with the familiar buzz of electronic music and the smell of sweat mixed with nicotine. It looks like it’s his lucky day though, because here you are, talking with a client behind the bar.
Jungkook can’t help but smile to himself. He observes you for a while from afar, watching you listening to someone’s tipsy rambling with a polite, yet forced sympathy. He decides to save you from the uncomfortable situation, marching to the bar and sitting on one of the stools.
He sighs to himself, remembering the pieces and bits from his memory of the last time he was there, making a total fool of himself. If it wasn’t for you, his foot would never step here ever again.
You excuse yourself and leave the drunk man, just to be met with Jungkook's smiling eyes. Somehow, his brain short circuits and he sends you a wink.
You roll your eyes, approaching him. “What can I get you?” you ask. “Although after last time I suggest a glass of water.”
He chuckles, pulling his face mask down. “When do you finish?”
Sparing a glance at the watch you have on your wrist, you answer, “In forty minutes.”
“A beer it is, then.”
You hesitate, reaching for the glass. “And you’re just going to sit here the whole time, waiting for me?” you ponder with a surprised expression, just like you’d never thought he could do something like that.
Jungkook only grins in response.
For the next half an hour he watches you work; serving drinks to clients, polishing glasses, occasionally giving a love advices to some teary-eyed girls in a short, black dresses. Just when he’s chugging the last sip of his beer, you come up to him.
“I’m done for tonight. You can wait for me outside.” you say.
When his in front of the bar, he pulls out his cigarettes and lights up one to pass the time. He wouldn’t call himself addicted. He smokes rather sporadically, mostly when he’s out getting wasted or when he’s stressed about something. Or just like now, when circumstances are conducive.
Few minutes later you appear by his side. He takes one last drag and whirls to face you. “So you really quit, huh?” he asks, making you nod curtly. “And you don’t smoke even when you’re on a party?” He's almost astonished.
“Nope, even then.” you confirm, hearing him mutter a ‘Wow’ under his breath. “Well? What now?” You cross yours arms over chest, eyebrows lifted in question.
He tosses the cigarette to the ground and tramples it with his foot. “I thought we could go to your flat, eat late night ramen and just talk.”
“So we're hanging out now?” There’s a slight sarcastic lilt to your voice and he worries for a moment you are going to tell him to fuck off but then, your features soften. “It sounds nice but I know a spot not far away from here when we can sit and talk. If that’s okay with you.” you say.
“Lead the way, then.”
You didn’t lie when you said the place you were taking him wasn’t far away. What you didn’t tell him though, was that getting there meant climbing up the fire escape all the way to the rooftop of a run-down tenement house.
“Care to explain me how do you know about this place?” Jungkook asks once he’s seated comfortably on an old, emerald sofa next to you. It’s a mystery to him how this peace of furniture was brought here but nevertheless, it was someone's good idea.
You were right. It is nice here. You have a full view to the city from up there and he’s sure it would be easy to see the green hills in daylight or watch how the sky burns during sunsets.
“Minho took me there first,” you explain, answering his question. “His police department is few blocks from here. One day they got a call from some angry, old lady, saying that someone was playing music very loudly nearby. When they arrived, they found out a group of teenagers had organized a party on top of the rooftop.”
Jungkook hums. “He’s quite romantic,” Upon seeing your clueless expression he adds, ‘’Your boyfriend, I mean.”
“Ah, yeah,” You crack a smile, although he thinks it doesn’t quite reach your eyes. “He is. Sometimes.”
He decides not to press you about it any further.
He leans his head back, closing his eyes for a brief moment and inhaling the chilly, pre-spring air. Then, he feels you nudging his side. “So, what do you want to talk about?” you ask, staring at him in anticipation. Jungkook lets out a groan in response and runs his hand down his face. You chuckle, “Hey, we didn’t come here to sit in silence. Entertain me a little, would you.”
He sighs your name. You aren’t prone to giving up easily, he knows it. You’re probably the most stubborn person he’s had a chance to encounter and that is also one of the main reasons he came up with the ‘Miss Grumpy’ nickname when you were in fifth grade.
“I’m pretty sure the golden maknae of BTS has more interesting life than me,” you snicker and he knows it was meant to sound playful coming from you, but he feels something heavy in his chest hearing your remark.
He musters up a small smile. “You would actually be surprised if I told you that my life isn’t as exciting as it may look.”
It hasn’t missed your eye how tired Jungkook seems. No matter how much he tries, he can’t possibly hide fully the bangs underneath his eyes or the greish complexion of his skin. It’s weird seeing him in person like this; without stage make-up and plastered smile reserved for the fans. Seeing him so humane.
For the last three years, you only watched him on your phone's screen. But it wasn’t really him. Your Jungkook is sitting right next to you and silently observing the city during the night. Your Jungkook smoked cigarettes with you by the beach in Busan and got you an autograph from one of your favourite artists he had met personally at the backstage after some award ceremony.
Your Jungkook would never got himself drunk to the point of unconsciousness, risking his reputation. But again, you might only think you know him.
“Let’s talk about you instead,” Jungkook says suddenly, pulling you out from your thoughts. “What do you do beside working in that club?”
You sigh. “You know I don’t like talking about myself either,”
“I know, but we haven’t seen each other for so long. I need to catch up with you.”
You fight an urge to scoff, “And whose fault is that?” but you’re not in the mood to argue. Nor is Jungkook, as you suppose. “I’m studying journalism. Bartending is my part-time job. I had to start working because I couldn’t afford to pay for rent just from my poor scholarship. Prices have increased so if I wanted to stay in Seoul, I needed to work, whether I wanted or not.”
Jungkook knows there’s no words that could somehow lessen your struggles. It’s been a long time since he worried about money. Now, he can have everything he’s ever wanted yet something’s always missing. And he still hasn’t discovered how to fill that void.
“You’re still writing?” he asks instead, referring to your hobby you’ve picked up when you were kids.
“Yes, I am. That’s actually what most journalists do, Jungkook. We write.”
He laughs boyishly, high-pitched and you recall that pleasant sound from the back of your memory. He used to be embarrassed of it when he was younger and often hid his mouth behind his hand to muffle it. You’re glad he doesn’t do that anymore.
“What’s so funny in that?” You sound slightly irritated, although you’re trying hard to stop yourself from smiling too. It just comes naturally when you’re around him.
He takes a deep breath and then says, “Nothing. I’m just thinking,”
You raise your eyebrow. “Thinking? About what?”
“Remember how you’ve always dreamt about becoming a writer when we were teenagers?”
You nod. That’s still very much your goal. Albeit you’re aware it might as well not come true, sadly. “I do. And what about it?”
Jungkook doesn’t respond right away. Instead, he places his arms behind his head and leans back on the couch with a coy smile. “Maybe you will write my biography one day.” he says after a moment.
“Only if you pay me shit tons of money for that.”
“Agreed.”
You find yourself coping his position and slumping on the couch as well. His eyes are closed, and you watch him from the corner of your eye. Despite the dim lighting, he seems glowing in the darkness like a single, silver spot on the noir sky.
“I think I know how would it be called.” you say suddenly.
“Hmm?”
“Your biography. I came up with the title.” you clarify.
“What is it then?” Jungkook hums with his eyes still closed.
You take a moment to answer, looking up at the blackboard night sky above you. Smiling to yourself, you reply. “I would call it ‘Lost star’.”
His brows furrow slightly. “Why is that?”
“That’s my secret for now.”
“I don’t know. I think this song needs something more.”
“It’s fine for me, Namjoon-ah. The bridge is great, stop worrying so much. We still have a lot of time before the deadline.”
“Thanks, hyung. Jungkookie, have you spoke with Hyowon-hyung about your solo?”
“Kook-ah? We’re talking to you.”
“Jeon Jungkook!”
Jungkook looks up from his phone at the sound of Seokjin's harsh voice. He sends his older friend a clueless look. “Hmm?”
Namjoon sighs. “I asked you a question, Jungkook.”
Jungkook puts away his phone. “I’m sorry, hyung. I wasn’t listening. Can you repeat it?”
“Of course you weren’t, you’ve been staring at your phone for the past twenty minutes instead of paying attention to us.” Seokjin scoffs, digging his chopsticks in the kimchi he's eating.
It’s a little past seven and they are having late dinner at their dorm after a whole day of schedule. Jungkook doesn’t even know what type of commercial they were recording. He just kept reading everything from the monitor behind the camera as he always does, trying to make it seem as unnoticeable as possible.
Truth to be told, Seokjin's right. He hasn’t been paying attention to their conversation, although he definitely should have. Telling them he was texting you this whole time is a pathetic and dumb excuse, he knows that. He doesn’t want them to ask him questions about you. Not yet.
“I asked if you talked to Hyowon-hyung.” Namjoon repeats after a moment.
A hint of realization crosses Jungkook's face at that. “Yeah, I did. He played me the first draft and told me to work on the lyrics.” he says, reaching for his chopsticks.
Namjoon nods, humming. “Do you want me to help you with that?”
Jungkook shrugs. “No, you don’t have to. I’m just waiting for the inspiration to kick in.”
And he hopes it’s going to enlighten him soon. He has a few songs written on his own but creating music for an album it’s different. The standards are higher, expectations bigger. Restricted time always makes him jittery, too.
Taking a mouthful of his bibimpap, a smile flashes across his face. He glances if anyone is looking at him now but his friends are busy talking about something regarding the next release. He reaches for his phone and writes a message to you.
[7:16pm] me:
do you remember the time when you cooked a bibimpap for my goodbye dinner at home?
Not even a minute later, he receives a response from you.
[7:16pm] Miss Grumpy:
yeah I do
why are you asking me this tho
[7:17pm] me:
I’m eating it know and it reminded me of that day
sorry but god, it was awful
[7:16pm] Miss Grumpy:
excuse me????
He remembers probably every second of that day. His mother’s tears, your extremely undercooked meat and his father’s affectionate hug.
Smiling to himself, he taps another sentences.
[7:18pm] me:
I couldn’t tell you that. you looked so proud of yourself
I just ate everything like it was the most delicious course on this planet
best acting of my life
[7:19pm] Miss Grumpy:
you asshole
i poured my heart into this
you’re right, that was your best acting. definitely better than war of hormone playboy jungkook
He rolls his eyes. The amount of times you joked about this particular moment of his career is neverending.
[7:19pm] me:
can you please stop
[7:20pm] Miss Grumpy:
fuck off. of course I won’t
how was it?
ah I know.
I’m a bad boy so I like bad girls
showstopping. truly
He tries to muffle his laughter but there’s no use for that. He snickers under his breath, hoping no one have noticed but he was oh, so wrong. Because as soon as he looks up from the phone screen, all eyes are on him.
Namjoon clears his throat. “You’re not eight anymore, Jungkook, so I won’t lecture you like a father but please, don’t use your phone while we’re eating.”
“Who are you texting this passionately anyway? You never put anything before food.” Hoseok adds, frowning.
“My hyung.” Jungkook answers casually.
In the corner of his eye he sees Taehyung leaning to whisper something in Jimin's ear and they both giggle quietly. Jungkook sends them a glare.
They stop but few seconds later, Taehyung breaks into his signature boxy smile.
“What is this, Taehyung?” Namjoon asks, frowning.
“It looks like our Jungkookie is lying.”
Jungkook grips the edge of the table tightly. He searches for Jimin's eyes but he looks away quickly, as though almost guilty.
At the other end of the table, Yoongi puts away his chopsticks and wipes his mouth with a napkin. “Care to elaborate on that, Taehyung-ah?”
“He isn’t texting his brother. I think Jungkookie might be in love,” he sing-songs, giggling to himself.
Jungkook’s first instinct is to smack his friend's in the head. And so does he. “What the fuck, Tae?” he snaps.
“Language, kid!” Seokjin says automatically.
“I'm twenty-two!”
“And I’m twenty seven, so shut your mouth and listen to your elders. What is Taehyung speaking about?”
Jungkook shakes his head. “I have no idea.”
“Oh, stop bullshitting us. I looked at your phone screen when it was lying on the table. You don’t call your hyung ‘Miss Grumpy'.” Taehyung says, his fingers doing the quotation mark in the air.
“You’re not supposed to look at my phone! It’s called privacy!” Jungkook exclaims, however it’s pointless. Everyone now is focused on him and you.
“Can someone tell who the fuck is ‘Miss Grumpy’?” Seokjin asks, looking around the table.
Jungkook runs his hand through his hair in a nervous manner. He screwed up, and now they won’t let him breathe for at least five more days. “Her name is actually ___. She’s my childhood friend from Busan.”
He hears Taehyung chuckling next to him. “Oh, come on. You can tell us you’re sexting her. We won’t judge.”
“I’m not!”
“Shut the fuck up, all of you!” Yoongi says, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Can’t we for once eat in peace? Jungkook, please, kindly explain us who this girl you’re texting with is.”
Jungkook pursues his lips. “I told you. She’s just my old friend. Why would I lie to you?”
Seeing their uneasy expressions, he realises he said the wrong thing. He has lied to them before about many things. It isn’t anything shocking that they doubt his words now. They have all rights to do it.
Namjoon is the first one to break the uncomfortable silence. “Jungkook, you know the rules. We can't freely date like we would like to. I suggest you should end things with this girl, whatever you're both doing, before it escalates into something more serious. Before you hurt her and yourself in the process.” he says.
Hoseok nods at his friend’s words. “Namjoon is right, Jungkookie. Serious relationships are just going to make everything more complicated.”
Jungkook grits his teeth. “We aren’t dating.” he spats.
“Sleeping together also isn’t a good idea.”
“We aren’t having sex,” Jungkook's eyes narrow. “Why didn’t you tell the same thing to Yoongi-hyung when he was seeing that blonde girl? He sneaked her into his room one day and I’m pretty sure he wasn’t just playing her his music.” he scowls, shaking his head.
“Hyung's older than you. Besides, he ended things with her some time ago.” Namjoon counters.
“It’s true, Jungkook-ah. Namjoon is right. No matter what you’re doing with her, you should always be careful.” Yoongi adds.
Something breaks in Jungkook at that. All of the pent-up frustration seems to leave his body at once. “You know what? Fuck off, all of you. I’m not a kid anymore. I can make my own decisions and they are none of your fucking business.” He stands up from the table abruptly.
“Jungkook, wait. Let’s talk without fighting now,” Namjoon pleads but he isn’t listening to him anymore.
Jimin, who was silent this whole time, puts his hand on Jungkook's shoulder. “Jungkookie–” he starts but his immadietly cut off by Jungkook's harsh tone.
“Stop calling me that!” Jungkook snaps and walks away, slamming the door to his room behind himself.
There’s a knock to his door an hour after.
This pattern feels familiar. He messes something up, they give him some space to think and reflect about it on his own and then, it’s time to sit together and discuss it openly almost like a peace treaty. Jungkook says sorry, promises he will be a better person and everyone moves on.
He doesn’t bother getting up until he hears a voice behind the door speak up. “It's Yoongi-hyung. I’m not here to force you to apologize. I just want to talk.”
Jungkook's brows furrow. He stares at the door, imagining Yoongi standing behind it with his hands in pockets and eyes glued to the ceiling. He debates whether he should open the door and let him in or keep sulking just a little more until the atmosphere will loosen up on its own.
Somehow, his thoughts wander to you. You would probably tell him that communication is the key to solving problems, or something along the lines. That he can’t shut himself from the world because he feels like no one really gets him. You would also call him childish but he doesn’t dwell on that more.
“Jungkook-ah? Please, open the door. I promise I won’t patronize you.”
He exhales loudly and gets up from the bed. If there’s one person in this house whose words he can trust wholeheartedly, it’s Yoongi. He twists the handle and walks back to his bed.
The door clicks shut a few moments later, mattress dipping where Yoongi makes a room for himself next to him, clearing his throat. “Listen,” he begins but Jungkook cuts him off with a scoff.
“I thought you said you wouldn’t give me patronizing ted talks.”
“Yeah, I did. But I won’t stare at the wall in silence either,” Yoongi says. Few deep breaths later, he continues. “Jihye was a nothing but a good friend to me with whom I had sex sometimes, no strings attached. Until one day I realised our relationship stopped being solemnly based only on physical attraction. That’s why I decided to end things with her.”
“Did you fall in love with her?” Jungkook asks.
Yoongi shakes his head. “No, I didn’t. But I could. And that’s what scared me the most.”
“Why?”
In the corner of his eye, Jungkook sees him smiling sadly. “It's simple. Because being together would only lead us to heartbreak. I cared about her too much to make her hurt like that due to my selfishness.” he says. “This is the same reason why Jimin didn’t continue his relationship with our make-up noona even after she left the company. And that’s exactly why you shouldn’t get any hard feelings involved with that friend of yours.”
Jungkook pursues his lips. He understands Yoongi's concerns but his situation is different. Jimin was in love with that woman. He was ready to buy an apartment for them and move out from the dorm. If someone from the company hadn’t found out about their secret relationship, he would have still been sneaking around with her.
Jungkook though, doesn’t have any feelings for you. He’s gone past his silly crush when you were younger a long time ago. Besides, you have a boyfriend and he doesn’t chase after taken women. At least not intentionally.
“She’s just a friend, hyung.” he says finally but it sounds more like he tries to convince himself, not Yoongi.
Yoongi pats him on the shoulder. “I know. Just be careful, okay?” And with that, he leaves Jungkook's room.
Jungkook knew it was a bad idea as soon as he stepped into the club and loud, thumping music filled his ears.
He knew it when he ordered a round of shots and gulped them down one after another. When he found himself in the middle of the crowd of sweaty bodies, head buzzing and arms around a nameless brunette, his tongue between her lips.
And he knows it right now, when he’s sitting in a booth, her ass placed directly over his crotch where he’s already sporting a hard-on. The girl (Eunbi? Or maybe it’s Eunji? He hasn't registered when she shouted it to his ear because he was too busy staring down at her cleavage) grinds herself with eagerness against him and he lets out a groan, leaning to plant kisses on the side of her neck. And in that exact moment, when his chapped lips meet the porcelain skin of her throat, he locks eyes with you.
(And he’s once again reminded how stupid it was to go to the club where you work.)
After his conversation with Yoongi he felt like he needed to prove something to himself. That he’s not the one to fall in love impulsively, that he can fuck and not get feelings involved. He could have gotten himself drunk in in any other place yet here he is, a random girl straddling him while he blinks his bloodshot eyes at you.
Your gaze trails down from his face to his palms splayed on brunette’s bottom and you scoff to yourself, averting your attention somewhere else. If he’s disappointed, he hides it pretty well, sucking yet another purplish mark on the girl's neck she accepts with another roll of her hips.
Whimpering into his ear, she moves herself faster against his hardness but he doesn’t pay mind to her anymore, not when he catches you looking at him again in the corner of his eye.
The girl leans to kiss him and he obliges, tongue darting to lick into her mouth but his eyes remain trained on you the whole time. You see him slipping his fingers underneath her skirt and smirking when he feels the evidence of her lust between her thighs. He wants you to watch him making her come undone on his lap, he craves to relish in the sick thrill of having you witnessing what he’s capable of doing. But when he’s about to pull the girl's lingerie to the side, you’re turning away and disappearing from his sight.
His fingers stay pressed to the flesh of brunette's thighs, unmoving, until she purrs into into his ear. “Oppa, please. Want you so bad.”
Jungkook tsks to himself, rolling his eyes at her saccharine sweet, high-pitched voice. “Not here.” he mutters.
Minutes later he’s in the club's bathroom, his head thrown back and grunts escaping his lips. He looks down at the mop of her hair as she swallows around his cock, bringing him closer to the release. She peeks at him from between her eyelashes, teary-eyed and already fucked-out.
He threads his fingers through her hair and pulls hard, until she moans around him. “That’s it, baby. Gonna fuck your mouth now.” He pushes himself deeper, feeling her choke. She welcomes the pain without complaint, tears flowing down her cheeks and palms pressed obediently on his thighs. Jungkook clenches his jaw, focusing on his pleasure until he groans lowly and comes down her throat.
He pulls away from her mouth, tugging himself back into his pants. She stands up from her kneeling position on wobbly legs and wraps her arms around his neck. “What about me, oppa?” she giggles, pressing a kiss to his lips. “Won’t you fuck me now?”
He sighs, staring down at her. There are smudges of mascara underneath her eyes, her cheeks are wet with tears and her lipstick is smeared. He reaches with his thumb to wipe it, and she leans into his touch.
He feels guilty telling her to be quiet and hiking her skirt up. He feels it when she climaxes around his fingers with a cry of his name on her lips. He feels it too even stronger, cleaning her up and leaving to fix her make-up in front of the blurry mirror, but that’s all he can do. That’s everything he can provide.
Later that night, when he's finally in his own bed, your face flashes behind his eyelids. He's sick of himself, of his actions, that he let his weaknesses got best of him again.
Before he could even think of it, he types a message to you.
[3:45am] me:
I’m sorry. I was drunk and couldn’t think straight
Few bits of silence later, his phone buzzes.
[3:47am] Miss Grumpy:
I know you were
Did you at least thank her?
He scoffs to himself, thinking about proper words to answer you but strangely, he recalls your wide eyes transfixed on him and the way you held his challenging gaze when his lips kissed another woman. He’s never seen you looking at him like that before. You’d be lying if you said it didn’t affect you even the slightest.
[3:48am] me:
don’t worry. she had a good time
[3:48am] Miss Grumpy:
goodnight, jungkook
[3:49am] me:
sleep tight, ___.
There’s something apprehensive in the perpetual ticking of the clock when it's silent in the room. It almost feels like the sound keeps getting louder and louder as the time passes by, as if it’s expecting a storm to occur and shatter the calm.
“___?”
You’re brought back to the reality from your thoughts by Minho's voice. He has a questioning look on his face, watching you with raised eyebrows.
“I’m sorry,” you say sheepishly. “I was lost in my thoughts for a moment.”
“I could see that,” Minho reaches for his tea cup and takes a sip. “Is everything alright?” he asks, but you shake your head with a smile.
“Just university stuff.” you say vaguely and he doesn’t press you about it any further, nodding in understanding.
Minho left his work earlier today, coming straight to your flat. It’s Wednesday and Wednesdays are dedicated to spending your time together on dates. Today, you’re going to the cinema and to your favourite sushi bar. For the second time this month.
“I’m going to use the bathroom now and then we can head out, okay?”
You answer him with a nod. Standing up, you gather your cups and place them into the sink but right when you’re about to wash them, you hear Minho's phone buzz with single notification.
You bite your lip. You know you shouldn’t look but you push it to the back of your head for now, sparing a quick glance at his lockscreen.
Sooyoung: when you will be free next time?
You frown. You’ve never heard him taking about any woman from his work with a name like this. The message sounds ambiguous but it doesn’t have to mean anything to worry about at the same time. You just have to ask to be sure. That’s what couples do, right? They communicate.
Taking a deep breath, you wait for Minho until he comes back from the bathroom.
“Are you ready to–”
“Who’s Sooyoung?” you cut him off before you’ll lose your courage and let the anxious thoughts consume you without asking him first.
He furrows his brows but then his eyes land on the phone lying on the table. He pursues his lips. “You’ve been snooping through my phone?”
“I didn’t have to snoop. I just looked at the screen when you got a notification.” you say as calmly as possible, trying to hide your nerves. “I just thought it’s a little weird that some other woman is asking you when you will be free next time.”
Minho's eyes narrow. “What are you insinuating?” he asks.
“I’m not insinuating anything. Just tell me who she is, it’s simple.”
He looks uneasy, tongueing the inside of his cheek but nevertheless, he’s still as composed as ever, gauging you with tentative expression. “Sooyoung is my friend from work. She’s a new recruit and we go to the shooting range to practice once a week,” he explains. “And before you will ask: we aren’t there all alone. Kihyun accompanies us. So you don’t have to worry about anything. Can we go now, honey?”
You lower your eyes to the ground, nodding. When you try to move past him, Minho catches your wrist. “Do you have anything more to add?” His voice is stern and you gulp.
“I'm sorry.” you almost whisper.
“It’s okay. Just don’t jump into conclusions next time, okay?” he says, hand still wrapped tightly around your hand.
“Okay.” you repeat and he releases you.
A smile appears on his face after that, and he cocks his head at you. “Let's go.”
You exhale a shaky breath you didn’t even know you were holding and follow him.
There are some things in our lives that we cannot predict.
Like the heavy traffic on the way to work because of the car crash happening somewhere in the city or meeting your ex you’d rather forget about in a shopping mall months after break up. And when they do happen, we can only confront what the faith has in store for us, no matter how much we resist.
You certainly couldn’t predict that after sending a ‘god I want to get drunk so bad’ message to Jungkook he would actually appear hours later on your doorstep with grocery bags in one hand and pizza box in another, grinning broadly when he saw your genuinely surprised expression.
That’s when the surrealism kicks in, when you’re sitting on the floor of your bedroom, one empty bottle of suju on your account and the second almost drained to the half. When Jungkook is right by your side, tomato sauce on his chin you wipe out for him with a grimace, talking about some dumpling incident that caused a huge fight among his friends.
But no matter how much you try, how much alcohol you pour into your system, you’re unable to fully get rid of the anxious thoughts sitting at the back of your head.
It’s been a while since your argument with Minho and even though you want to believe him, the creeping feeling that something’s off won’t leave you. It’s easy to say to always trust your intuition, but what if it prompts you scenarios you wouldn’t like to become real?
Jungkook must have sensed that something doesn’t feel right because he stops his rambling mid-sentence, clearing his throat. “Are you even listening to me now, buttercup?” he asks.
You snap out of your thoughts at that, mustering an apologetic smile. “Sorry. I was but–”
“But you zoned out for a moment,” he finishes. “It’s okay. I know you since we were kids, I can tell when there's something bothering you. It’s all in your eyes.” he says, making you furrow your brows in confusion.
“What’s in my eyes?”
“They look sad.”
You shy away from his piercing stare, looking at your lap instead. You’ve always proud yourself that you can read people like an open book. That’s why you can so easily hide your true emotions at bay before the whole world. But if there’s only one person who is capable of seeing through you, it’s Jungkook.
You can open up to him, you remind yourself. You’re safe, he’s been your friend for such a long time, he won’t hurt you.
You take a deep breath and say, “Minho and I have some trouble. I mean, it’s nothing serious but he’s been acting weird lately and few days ago we got into a fight, so yeah. I’m just... a little stressed, that’s all.”
“Should I kick his ass?” he suggests and knowing him, he might as well be serious so you brush it of with a chuckle.
“Maybe not yet.”
You reach for the empty pizza box between you, putting it to the side. You debate taking another shot of soju but eventually you refuse, placing the bottle next to the carton. You’ve had enough alcohol for tonight anyway.
“Are you happy with him, ___?” Jungkook asks suddenly, and you feel like all the air in the room has been sucked off.
You turn to face him, heart rickocheting faster in your ribcage. If you’re truly shocked he’s had an audacity to ask this, you hide it pretty well. Something in your head is telling you that the best defence is attack, so you aim.
“Are you happy?”
Your question stirs something in him. You don’t know what you expected but you could never imagine him actually catching the bait and answering you with honesty. Yet he does.
“You know, I’ve been asking myself the same question a lot lately,” he says, smiling lopsidedly. “There are days when I’m the happiest person on this planet, when I feel like I can do everything. But sometimes, when I step down the stage and lights go out, it just gets harder.” There’s a slight crack to his voice at the end and when you look him in the eyes, they’re glassy. “If I knew it could be so lonely, I wouldn’t have signed up for this. Ever.”
Some things in life we are able to predict. We know the road leading to success and accomplishment might be bumpy, yet we cannot truly be prepared for the outcome of all the difficulties we come across along the way. Jungkook was aware of the consequences his popularity may cause in the future, but he simply didn’t think it could be so overwhelming.
You scoot closer to him, your hand finding his amid your bodies. He looks down and intertwines his fingers with yours with a hint of smile in the corner of his lips. “You have all rights in the world to feel the way you do, Jungkook, remember that. But you’re not alone in this. I’m always here, okay? I’ve been for the past three years and I’m not going anywhere soon.” you say firmly, closing the distance between you.
He accepts your hug with eagerness, wrapping his arms around your frame with desperation, pulling you closer. It’s been so long since you’ve talked like this, since you’ve comforted each other and shared deepest fears.
Jungkook buries his face in the crook of your neck, where you feel him breathing out shakily. He rests his palms on your back, tracing soothing patterns over the material of your hoodie and that’s when you realise he wasn’t the only one who needed to be held like this, even just for a moment. It’s exactly what you’ve been missing, the sheer intimacy of a simple hug.
“Sometimes I just wish it was different.” he whispers into your hair and you close your eyes, swallowing the lump in your throat.
“Me too.”
Somehow, it seems like the most honest thing you’ve said.
Even when you pull away, you’re still mere inches from him. You feel his breath on your skin, his hands travelling from your backside to your hips. Jungkook's eyes are focused on your face but there’s no sadness or melancholy in them now. In his deep brown orbs you recognize something akin to longing.
And maybe the alcohol running in your veins is deceiving you, but when his gaze drops to your lips, you can’t do anything; you’re paralyzed, barely breathing. It’s electrifying, crawling in your skin. His right palm finds the apple of your cheek, thumb stroking your bottom lip until he releases it and tilts your chin. The moment your eyes meet his comes with realization that maybe you were right - you see the yearning in them. But it’s mixed with desire.
The first touch of his lips on yours feels almost exploratory. He kisses you so softly and carefully you might believe it’s his first kiss, but you know this is only a false inkling. Truth to be told, his experience in this area is incomparable to yours. With the shy press of his lips on yours he’s only testing the waters, sensing if you want to push him away. Yet you don’t.
You succumb to the way his chapped lips move against yours, like they’ve always belonged there. You want to be as close to him as possible, feel the heat radiating of him on you. Nothing else matters beside you and him right now, the reality outside doesn’t exist as long as you’re in the confines of your small bedroom, lips colliding and rational thoughts gone.
When your fingers almost hesitantly thread into the locks at the back of his head, Jungkook deepens the kiss. Your body is moving on your own accord, knees sinking onto the floor on either sides of his thighs until you’re straddling his lap. You taste the desire on his tongue as he runs it through the seam of your lips, seeking entrance you provide.
His hands find purchase on your hips and when he nips on your bottom lip you let out a silent moan, leaning your forehead on his. “What are we doing?” you whisper, breathing heavily down his flushed cheeks and parted mouth. You’re trying to grasp the meaning behind all of this: of your quickened heartbeat, of the evidence of his desire where you groins meet.
“Something we are going to regret later.” It’s the answer Jungkook gives, connecting your mouths once again in a searing kiss.
Everything seems to crush around you. Erupting volcanoes, cascading waterfalls, tsunamis consuming the land. It’s dangerous, Jungkook thinks to himself, kissing you like that, nibbling on your bottom lip and eliciting a moan. But he can’t help but drown in it.
You’ve never felt quite like this; consumed by the flames of forbidden desire, ready to burn into ashes. Jungkook’s palms shift underneath your hoodie and you’re surprised how warm they feel against your skin, caressing your stomach and underside of your breasts. He’s touching you with ardour, like he doesn’t believe you’re in his arms, like you’re going to disappear the second he lets go of you.
You place sloppy kisses on his cheeks, jawline, down his neck, relishing in the way he seems to be affected by your caresses, tightening his grip on your waist with every press of your lips on his skin. He grasps the hem of your hoodie, looking for any sign of discomfort in your eyes but when you nod your head, he doesn’t hesitate to lift it off you, uncovering your bare cleavage.
Biting your lip, a sudden wave of insecurity washes over you but it quickly vanishes as soon as his palms engulf your breasts almost roughly, thumbs brushing your nipples until the peeks harden under his ministrations and you can’t help but gasp. He trails kisses down your throat, teeth grazing your skin almost feather-like and you know what’s that for. He doesn’t want to live a visible mark there.
In one, swift motion, Jungkook puts his hands underneath your thighs and stands up from the floor, lifting you up with ease and placing gently on your bed. He hovers over your half-naked figure, eyeing you with the carnal hunger that makes your chest raise and fall with heavy intakes of breath, core pulsing with want.
He takes off his shirt and tosses it somewhere on the floor, and now you understand why all these girl are so drown to him. Jungkook's probably the most good looking man you’ve ever laid eyes on. Everything in him is crafted with perfection, from the prominent outline of his jaw, through the column of his throat and collarbones, to the sculpted expanses of his chest and abdomen.
Your fingerstips are itching to map every ridge and deep of his body but you remain still, anticipating his next move with rapidly beating heart. Dominance and power radiating of him nearly make you squirm underneath his scrutinizing stare. His dark eyes are telling you to obey him, and you give yourself to him without resistance. You’ve never felt this way, not with anyone. Yet here you are, stripped from the innocence and bared to the pleasure.
Jungkook reaches to the waistband of your leggings, pulling them down and leaving you with nothing but your underwear on. He straddles your thighs, his palm pressed flat to your stomach until he slides it lower, to the dip of your body where you drip with the need of being fucked until you forget your own name.
The first press of his fingers on your pussy makes your limbs jerk uncontrollably and he smirks at your reaction, seeing the material of your panties dampening with his small, teasing strokes. It’s almost embarrassing how quickly it wounds you up, blame it on your uncontrollable celibacy or maybe something else entirely.
“What do you want me to do, doll?” His question makes you whine, hips raising to feel more of his touch on you but he only chuckles at your apparent eagerness, patting your folds in reprimand.
“Anything,” you breathe out in response, looking at him with frenzied eyes and hoping he will be merciful to you.
Jungkook tsks, his fingers leaving your cunt and grasping your jaw tightly. “Be a good girl and use your words.”
You gulp, a humiliating blush reddening your cheeks. You’ve never really been a vocal person during sex, nor were people you had slept with but you can’t deny how much of a turn on is Jungkook's commanding voice.
“Please, Jungkook. Want you to touch me.”
“Where?” His other hand wanders down your body until he cups your center. “Here?” he asks in a mocking tone, making you nod silently. “You want me to touch your pretty pussy with my fingers?”
“Yes, please.”
He grasps your underwear and shruggs it off your legs, smirking when he sees you so affected by his words. He then shoves his index and middle finger into your mouth and watches as you obediently lap your tongue around them, looking at him with hooded eyes.
“Fuck.” he curses, pulling his fingers out of your mouth.
You look so pliant and submissive lying naked underneath him, so willing to let him do with you whatever he pleases. His cock throbs in his pants at the thought. He’s had girls at his beck and call before but it’s a different kind of lust with you. A strong yearning, consuming him from the inside, a desperation to be as close as two humans being submerged into carnality possibly can be.
Your back arches when his calloused fingers finally make contact with your bare pussy, slipping between your folds to gather the wetness dripping from your hole. You gasp at the feeling of his thumb circling your clit, biting your lip until you taste iron. He easily finds the right way to make you moan, to make your legs shake with want.
You cry out his name when he pushes the first digit inside. He swears under his breath when he feels your warm walls flattering around him. “M-more,” you whimper, hips lifting of the mattress and seeking friction.
Jungkook smirks at that. “You’re so wet, baby. You like it, don’t you? Such a greedy slut.” You’re mewling at his words, grasping his wrist when he roughly plunges another finger into your cunt and starts shoving them in and out, not sparing even a second to let you adjust to the punishing pace he sets.
He leans his body closer over yours, eyes focused on the way your face writhes in pleasure while his fingers are abusing your pussy. You’re dripping, your arousal coating the his palm and the insides of your thighs. When he sees you reaching to squeeze your breasts, he swears he’s never seen anything sexier than this in his entire life.
“Jungkookie–nghh, please,” You’re a blubbering mess, moaning incoherent sentences. You could sense your orgasm approaching, you’re feeling it warming your body from the tip of your toes all the way to your core where you’re gushing around his long fingers.
“Come on, doll. Be a good girl and cum for me.” Jungkook murmurs. With his words and his thumb flicking your bundle of nerves with practiced ease, you’re pushed over the edge, tears spilling from your eyes and coating your cheeks. He watches with parted mouth as you come with his name on your lips, your velvet walls deliciously tightening around his digits. He gives you a moment to ride out your high, stroking your side with his palm soothingly.
Pulling out his fingers, he places them in his mouth, humming lowly at the taste of your arousal on his tongue. He wants nothing more than bury his face between your thighs and lick you clean but right now, he needs to fuck you.
He stands up from the bed, taking off his pants and boxers along with socks and catches you peeking at him from the corner of your eye. Your chest is rising with laboured breaths, lips swollen from the way you’ve been biting them to stop yourself from letting out any loud noises that could potentially be heard through the thin walls of your apartment.
He digs one knee on the mattress, his other hand wrapped around his thick cock. You lick your lips at the sight, nails digging crescent moons into your palms.
“On your fours, baby.” Jungkook commands and you oblige with flushed cheeks, maneuvering your body onto your hands and knees. You feel him behind you, his palms stroking the skin of your bare ass. A sick thrill runs through your body at the prospect of being taken in such a humiliating position.
Groaning, Jungkook rubs the mushroom head of his cock through your folds, collecting the juices spilling out of you. That’s when you come back to your senses and your whole body stiffens. “Wait,” you call out, making him pause. “We need a condom.”
“I’m clean. Besides, I never fuck anyone else without protection.”
“Fine, just–” Closing your eyes, you release a shaky breath. “–you need to pull out, okay?”
Jungkook leans over your body, placing a kiss on your shoulder blade. “Relax, ___. I won’t do anything you don’t want me to.” With one hand on your waist and the other on your hip, he positions the tip of his cock at your entrance and pushes agonizingly slow inside, making you moan at the stretch. You’re grasping the sheets underneath between your fingers, knees threatening to give away after another measured stroke that leaves your heat pulsating.
“Fuck, you’re so tight. When was the last time he fucked you?” he grunts, digging his fingers into your flesh. At the mention of Minho, your body tenses. You breath heavily, trying to push the unwelcomed thoughts aside.
“A m-month ago?” you utter, recalling the last time you had sex. Or rather when you sucked him off and he didn’t bother reciprocating the favor.
Jungkook shoves his cock deeper, scoffing to himself. “His stupid for not appreciating this enough.”
You bite your lip, focusing on the feeling of him inside you. His words sound affectionate, too affectionate for your liking and you don’t want to think about this moment like it means more than what it is. Your hands tremble and lose balance when he fucks into you harder, until he’s filling you to the brim. You’ve never felt so deliciously full. A few bits of ragged breaths later, you mumble, ‘’You can move.”
He tightens his grip on you, bottoming out. He sets a steady pace, fucking you slowly but deeply, making you cry out into the pillow at the sensation of his cock dragging through your walls, making sure you feel every inch of him. “You feel so good, doll. So wet and tight. I’m gonna make a mess of your pretty pussy.” he says lowly.
The sounds of skin slapping against skin echo through the room with the promise of merciless fucking. Jungkook is relentless, pounding into you faster and faster, like he wants to ruin you, imprint himself on your body to make you remember how easily you can give into vulnerability. His hand slips underneath you and he lifts your upper body up, pressing your back into his chest. The new found angle causes him to hit the spot inside you that has you putty in his arms.
“Don’t–nghhh–stop, fuck!”
He grunts into your ear in response, sweaty bangs ticking the side of your neck. He sneaks his other hand around your throat and you gulp. “Is this okay?” You hear him whispering and you’re nodding, tears gathering in your eyes from the immense pleasure he is bringing to you with every snap of his hips that threatens to make you lose it on his cock.
His fingers apply a slight pressure against your neck, enough to make you lightheaded with unfamiliar yet ecstatic feeling. He overwhelms you in every way possible and you’ve never felt like this; so powerless yet alive at the same time.
Jungkook releases the grip on your throat but he’s hand still remains there as if in warning. “Look at you, taking my cock in your slutty cunt. You’re close, aren’t you? Gonna cum all over me?” he growls, fingers rubbing your clit in fast circles until tears are spilling down your cheeks and you’re keening.
“God–yes, fuck! Please, I want to cum so bad.” you whimper, squeezing your eyes shut. You’re on cloud nine, trembling in his arms. He tightens his hold on your throat again and with one last, final flick of his digits on your pussy you’re reaching your second orgasm this night.
Jungkook releases his hold on you, helping you lay down on your back after riding out your high to the brick of oversensitivity. His palm caresses the length of your body soothingly, calming you down. You’re eyes are still closed when he bends and kisses you. Surprised by his sudden gentleness, your breath hitches in your throat. He coaxes a small moan out of you when you finally relax, wrapping your arms around his neck blindingly and pulling him close.
You break away the kiss, feeling his stiff length pressing into your stomach. His cock is covered in your slick, thick and hard against his toned abdomen. Biting your lip, you sit up and enclose your fingers around his sex. Looking up, you're met with his dark orbs watching your movements. With his raven hair falling down on his face and sweaty chest, Jungkook looks painfully beautiful.
He lets out a hiss when you lean down and take him into your mouth, swirling your tongue around his velvet tip. “Fuck, just like that.” he murmurs. Gathering your hair in his hand, he makes a makeshift ponytail and stares down at you bringing him closer and closer to the edge with every drag of your pink muscle on his cock.
Feeling him twitch in your mouth, you take him deeper, ignoring the ache in your jaw. “Gonna cum.” Jungkook grunts and moments later he releases his seed down your throat. You swallow the bitterness of his arousal, lapping your tongue around his tip until he pulls out of you, wincing with oversensitivity.
Silence takes over the room. You don't dare looking at him, staring at your naked lap instead, thoughts screaming in your head. You know you’re going to feel the aftermath of your rough fucking tomorrow, and it won’t be only physical pain. You sit up, ready to go to the bathroom but a hand on your wrist stops you.
“Wait, I’ll do it.” Jungkook murmurs and you nod absentmindedly.
He gets up from the bed and disappears in the bathroom. Unsure of what to do, you force your muscles to move, sitting at the edge of the bed. Jungkook comes back a minute later, carrying a dump towel.
Your head drops to the ground immadietly. He kneels before you and you desperately avoid his eyes. You notice he’s put on his boxers already and now he’s cleaning you gently off, removing evidences of your sins from your skin. You will take a shower later, the water will wash you off from each other’s scents and lingering touches. Love bites will soon disappear, bruises on your hips fade. Yet the scars you left on your hearts won’t heal that easily.
Jungkook puts his hand on your knee and you bite your bottom lip. He takes your hoodie lying on the floor and puts on your naked, marked body. Your heart clenches in your chest at the simple gesture.
“___,” he calls your name. At that, you finally look up at him. He seems worried, you must tell, millions of thoughts crossing his mind at the moment as well as yours. “Let’s go to sleep for now, okay? We will talk about this in the morning.”
You don’t say anything, nodding at his words. You crawl onto the bed, trying to create as much distance as possible between your bodies but it’s pointless. You feel his breath on your neck and you're sure his itching to hold you, but he doesn’t know if he should, so he stays mere inches from you, until you both eventually fall asleep.
Jungkook wakes up hours later with a raging headache. He grunts to himself, rubbing his face with grimace and making another meaningless promise about drinking less alcohol. When he open his eyes, he realises he’s staring at the fluorescent stars attached to the ceiling. Your ceiling.
When he turns his head to the left, he finds the other side of the bed empty. It’s almost bright in the room, which means he’s stayed overnight again. And he didn’t do just that.
Bits of memories flash behind his eyelids: him coming to your flat to hang out, your conversation, the kiss that led to naked bodies and breathy moans. He fucked up royally this time.
Throwing the comforter off his body, he feels a sudden rush of coldness raising goosebumps on his skin. Frowning, he picks up his discarded clothes from the floor and starts putting them on. The door to your bedroom are cracked open, just like you haven’t closed them to not wake him up.
Jungkook raises from the bed once he’s fully dressed, and pushes the door. He finds you standing by the fully opened window in your kitchen, staring outside.
He understands now why there was so cold before. The fluffy, blueish robe wrapped around your body is probably doing little job at providing warmth, but you don’t seem to mind it at all. You don’t see him yet, your back facing him until he takes another step and the floor creaks underneath his weight.
He sees your shoulders raising and falling, as if you’ve just let out a sigh. Then, you turn around cautiously, a greish puffs of smoke swirling over your features. Jungkook raises a brow.
“I thought you said you had quit.” It’s the first thing he says, his voice still groggy from sleeping.
You shrug at that, averting your gaze to the view behind your opened window again. “I always smoke after making a bad decision.”
It sounds bitter coming from you. A testament of your recklessness and weak hearts. He could read the regret straight from your face. It’s all in your posture: you look broken. And he is the reason why you’re hurting. The guilt is almost eating him up from the inside. He needs to try fixing this before you will push him away and he’ll lose you again.
“I think we should forget about that.” you speak after a moment of silence, still refusing to meet his eyes. Your voice trembles and he feels it stabbing him right in the middle of his chest, depriving him of hope to make things good between you. “It’ll be for the better for of us if we act like nothing ever happened. We got drunk, we let our emotions get the best of us. That’s all.”
You and him both know it wasn’t just alcohol which made you let him touch you like that, fuck your worries away for a few bits of pleasant oblivion. It meant so much more but you’re too afraid to confront this. You aren’t ready yet.
When you close the window and finally look at him, Jungkook's shoulders are slouched. Defeated. Something aches in your heart at that. “I’m sorry. For everything,” he tells you. He’s clenching his fists by his sides and you know he’s hurting too, more than he could ever let anybody realize. “I should get going then.”
He exits the kitchen with one last, small smile reserved only for you. You didn't mean to handle the situation like that, like you’re quickly ripping off the band-aid, but you couldn’t think of a better way. Closing your eyes, you let your emotions decide once again. “Wait,” you call out after him, stepping into the hallway. “Maybe you will stay for breakfast.” you propose and Jungkook shakes his head.
“No. It’s okay. I don’t want to keep you busy.” he says, putting on his jacket. Reaching for the handle, he turns to you and smiles. “Take care, ___.” When the door close behind him, you let out a long exhale.
What Jeon Jungkook couldn’t predict, is that he will be the one doing walk of shame out of your flat.
#jungkook smut#bts smut#btswritingcafe#ksmutclub#bangtanarmynet#smutcentralnet#maknaesmutsociety#btsbookclub#bangtanhq#btswriterscollective#jungkook angst#jungkook x reader#jungkook fanfic#jungkook x you#my writing#lost stars
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
harana | jjk
translation: n. the act of wooing/courting someone by serenading him/her
pairing: jungkook x reader
genre: fluff, f2l au, drabble
word count: 3.5k
warning: none // rating: pg-13
requested by bebe athena @rookiegukie. Im sorry it took a while, but i hope you like it hun! You may still submit your requests for the drabble game Paraluman Playlist until the end of August. ✨
note: this didnt turn out as initially planned changing after jk released his latest cover so i highly rec u to listen to 10,000 hours by jjk (cover) while reading it hjfjgdjdkgm also it’s a first for me to delve into f2l trope ljggdhd yall forgive me if it’s too cliche bwahaha
“Hyung! ______-noona is here!” A kid who opened the door for you announced your arrival rather loudly, recognizing him as one of Jungkook’s cousins. You pushed through inside the nostalgic interior of the Jeon’s household. Nothing much has changed in the past two years.
Soon after, Jungkook appeared from the doorway you remember as the door leading to the kitchen. He’s decently dressed and when you say decent, you meant he’s not in his usual attire of anything black and over-sized. Nonetheless, he’s handsome as ever. You’re not gonna deny the fact.
“Hey!” He greets, face lighting up at the sight of you, biting back a smirk as he skims the length of you adorning a cute, yellow dress. He glances down at your hand holding a gift-wrapped present for his mom before draping an arm over your shoulders.
He feigns a frown, “You shouldn’t have bothered. Mom will appreciate you making it on her birthday.”
“Well, unlike someone I know, I’m thoughtful enough to prepare something for Auntie.” You tease, knowing he possibly bought nothing for his mom.
He scoffs, only proving your assumption right. “Yah! Don’t sound too enthusiastic, I’m the son here.”
“So what? I’m your mom’s favorite!” You retorted back.
“No you aren’t!” He snapped, while his mouth unconsciously juts forward in defeat.
Your eyebrow arches. “Is that a challenge I hear?”
Jungkook nonchalantly shrugged his shoulders. “Forget the competition. We’re here to make my mom happy.” He quickly dismisses, distracting you as he leads you straight to the garden area which you could already see where the guests are gathered through the glass doors.
As expected, the said small party looks simply classic with a touch of Mrs. Jeon’s sophisticated taste. Average-sized square wooden tables are neatly scattered in the expanse of the garden with uniform vintage table setting that coordinates well with the floral decorations in the vicinity. In front, a makeshift platform was made behind a decorated linen with pinned letters “Happy Birthday Mom!” Behind all the tables is where the buffet table was placed.
You’re actually relieved that your simple puff sleeve dress matches with the theme of the party, forgetting the guilt of having to wear the dress without borrowing it from your sister.
Mrs. Jeon was happily chatting with her guests but when the sliding door breaks open revealing you tucked under Jungkook’s arm, the present smile on her face stretches wide and immediately shuffled towards you and Jungkook’s way.
Mrs. Jeon audibly gushes just as you handed your gift and welcomed you with a warm, tight hug. “Thank you, dear.”
Jungkook took it as his cue to leave you two for a second.
When she draws back, she appreciatively give you a once over. “Oh, you look so lovely on your dress!” Mrs. Jeon clapped her hands. You smiled shyly in return.
“Thank you for coming, dear. It’s been ages since the last time I’ve seen you. Come here and get some food.” She says.
It’s true. After you’ve been in college two years ago, you’ve hardly stayed in your hometown for more than two weeks, hence, you couldn’t squeeze your time here to pay the Jeons a visit. Mrs. Jeon became your guardian whenever your parents were in business trips back in the days, and during the times of your stay at their house, you’ve grown much closer to her just like your second mom.
By the time you reach the buffet table, Mrs. Jeon caught Jungkook in the act of getting a piece of sushi straight from the chafing dish, and his poor soon right away earned a whack on his arm from his mom.
“Use the tongs!” She reproaches which made him flinches dramatically.
Such a baby.
You bit back a chuckle as Mrs. Jeon went on with “Go to the kitchen and refill the dispenser!” Jungkook pouts but obeys his mom without complaining. However, he made sure to shoot a fake glare at you before he disappears from the doorway.
Mrs. Jeon then handed you an empty plate. “Here, ______. I know you like pasta.”
Your eyes widened a little. Perhaps, you have not recovered from the surprise painted on your expression, hearing it come from her that she caught a glimpse of your slight shock state. Why should you be surprised when Jungkook knows it as well? He might have told her or something.
“Oh don’t be surprised, dear. My boy always asks me to cook pasta whenever you come around.”
Isn’t it his favorite food? “It’s… his favorite... right?” You began but ended up questioning the validity of your knowledge.
She laughs, “You know he could eat anything edible but cannot live without his portion of meat every day.”
“Oh.” It was only that moment it registered to you. His mom is right. He’d always make it a point to consume all your stocks of meat whenever he shows up in your dorm in the most unexpected days. His university is not too far away from yours. Yet, this guy thinks it’s worth the two-hour drive just to get to your dorm and pester the shit out of you.
“I’m so happy you’re able to make it on my birthday. Will you stay in town for the rest of your break?”
“Uhh… I was supposed to focus on saving up through my part time jobs this summer but my mom threatened to disown me if I don’t stay here during summer break.”
“Oh she’s being reasonable, honey. Believe me, I’d do the same thing if Jungkook refuses to go home at least once a month, unless of course, if he runs off with you.” She remarks in a teasing manner, earning a profuse blush to appear on your cheeks so abruptly.
Since you left home for uni, you actually believe Mrs. Jeon had forgotten about your shared interactions back then. Yet, here she is, still having faith that his son has actual feelings for you. She told you many times that she’d want a daughter like you or, at least, be her in-law. She always regarded it in a playful tone so you used to get mixed signals whether she was really serious or not. But then, you’d say the overused line: “we’re only friends”. She would then give you a knowing look and insisted that she knows her son well. Fortunately for you, she made it a point to only tease you whenever Jungkook was out of earshot.
By the time Jungkook came back a few moments later, you’re already seated in a vacant table at the farthest back. Jungkook occupied the seat next to yours, taking notice of the half-finished food on your plate.
“What time are you leaving?” He asks the moment he plopped down the chair. Your head cocked to the side to meet his gaze.
“Are you trying to make me leave early?” You prompted suspiciously.
He rolls his eyes. “I’m gonna drive you home, idiot.”
“Well, you don’t have to. I can… walk.”
“It’s not like I have a choice.” He mutters under his breath.
Your eyebrows quirked but you spoke no more. He lifted his shoulders in a nonchalant shrug. Did he mean his mom will force him to drop you off at your house just like the old times?
As the night progresses, the small celebration has pumped up with lively cheers from their relatives, incited by the impromptu program prepared by Jungkook’s cousins which was mostly filled with fun games. At some point of the said program, a small commotion on the side of the makeshift platform started to build up. The next thing you know, his cousin, the mastermind behind the entertainment portion of the party, caught yours and Jungkook’s attention when she announced his sudden participation in the program through a performance.
“Our boy Kookie here recently recorded a cover and he’s here to perform the live version and showcase his talent to our dear guests. Everyone, let’s welcome our very own Jeon Jungkook onto the stage!” His cousin enthusiastically says through the microphone. On cue, everyone in the garden, particularly his cousins, roared in earsplitting screams of cheer.
He blinks, completely perplexed. He was not given a heads up prior, much less told that he would perform a song in front of an audience. Hesitant due to his nerves, he backed away subtly just as he reaches the side of the supposed stage. However, his cousin caught up with his attempt and pushed him not too gently toward the platform, and even placed the microphone stand in front of him, giving him no room to say no. The expectant look of his relatives left him no choice but to just— his eyes suddenly caught your figure at the back when you stood up and went to the buffet table.
His heart thuds so hard against his rib cage that he’s afraid everyone can hear it through the mic, including you. He’s sure he’s as white as a paper by now more so that his nerves are getting the worst of him.
That song is not just any song he simply did a cover of. It was the song he meant to sing for you when the right time has come, when he’s ready to pour his heart out to you.
He sucked a deep breath once more, and slowly breathed out once more. Instinctively, his eyes fluttered closed when he heard the music began playing.
Ready or not, it’s now or never.
Do you love the rain? Does it make you dance
When you're drunk with your friends at a party?
At the sound of his voice filling the air of the summer night, you spun back around to face him. That’s how he missed the look on your face just as how you missed the chaotic cheering of his cousins as they piled up to the side of the platform.
What's your favorite song? Does it make you smile?
Do you think of me?
Hearing the beautiful lyrics wholeheartedly sang by Jungkook, the same one who stole your heart a long time ago, you couldn’t control your heart as it started racing so wildly, tiny specs of heat slowly spreading in your chest. Thoughts began to swirl in your mind – giving you the anticipation. The possibility. The potential love affair. That the friendship would develop into something more.
Before the next verse comes, Jungkook peeled his eyes open, however, he didn’t expect to see you awestruck there across his line of vision from the back, and meeting your expressive eyes. If he didn’t know better, he would have mistaken the glint in your eyes for something else.
Maybe just… maybe you like him too.
When you close your eyes
Tell me what are you dreaming?
Everything, I wanna know it all
You look so beautiful. That the thought of you alone could easily make his heartstrings twist so cruelly in his chest. Oh how he wishes you’d let him spoil you the way he’s been dying to. He’d be the luckiest man to ever live to have you as his girlfriend.
Jungkook didn’t know how he managed to put up the courage to return your gaze, never have you looked at him the way your pretty eyes are staring back at him now with the genuine fondness in them. Somehow, as he gets lost to his emotions, he suddenly couldn’t find the strength in him to take his eyes off of you.
I'd spend 10,000 hours and 10,000 more
Oh, if that's what it takes to learn that sweet heart of yours
Butterflies erupt crazily in your stomach, goosebumps start to appear on your skin and your cheeks heat up as he held you captive under his wistful stare. The longingness and the passion they hold, the twinkle of his orbs as his doe-like eyes are digging straight to your soul, what it is all for?
And I might never get there but I'm gonna try
If it's 10,000 hours or the rest of my life
I'm gonna love you
He’s always been a constant figure in your life since the moment you two became friends. He didn’t miss any important celebrations that involves you since then. And even though Jungkook has been vocal about being overprotective of you dating guys he didn’t know, none of you ever tried to address anything remotely related to romantic love. It gave you the temporary relief, because you’ve been pushing your feelings back in the depths of your heart since the moment you realized you’ve fallen in love with him.
You never had the guts to test the theory, but leaving wondering what if… When have you visited the thought, again? You have long disregarded the possibility because you believed he loves you like his sister. Nevertheless, you’re lucky to have met him and be the only constant in your life.
Do you miss the road that you grew up on?
Did you get your middle name from your grandma?
When you think about your forever now
Do you think of me?
Jungkook’s face stretches in a subtle smile, forgetting about his nerves, his sweaty palms and the guests who kept looking back and forth between him and you in curiosity while he seems magnetized at his view. You.
When you close your eyes
Tell me what are you dreaming?
Everything, I wanna know it all
You smiled, recalling the times you two were inseparable. The times he let you cry on his shoulder, when he used to help you sneak out in the middle of the night, be your chaperone, witnessed you getting drunk for the first time in your life and even that one time a senior stole your first kiss. It was the first time you saw Jungkook that angry, beating the shit out of a poor guy two years ahead of us over a single peck. Your memories with him didnt end in high school for he didn’t stop making efforts to see you, regularly visiting you frequent enough that he’d made himself home at your place.
Ooh, want the good and the bad
Everything in between
Ooh, gotta cure my curiosity
In the midst of serenading you, he recollects the memories he shared with you. The day you two were introduced to each other was still as good as new in his memory bank, or the times that you encouraged him to push through to audition to his dream role that you even learned to play his audition piece just so he could practice with you every day after school. His basketball games with you as his personal cheerleader, the times that he couldn’t hide his jealousy when you dated someone else, the immature fights that always led him to drink his heart out as if you two had broken up, and you nursing him back to sobriety. When you two were separated in college, he’d always make a way to bother you whenever he’s drunk and you’d end up going to his place and ceaselessly irk him while he rotted from hangover.
His angelic voice singing the rest of the song lulls you further into your thoughts, gathering each memory like a missing piece in the puzzle. Why didn’t you see all the signs back then? Were you blinded by your then-infatuation over him that you failed to hint his own feelings? He never gave you a reason to make you think he likes you more than a friend nor tried to hide anything from you, right?
Shortly afterwards, you were pulled back into the reality when you hear the cheers of the guests, signaling the end of Jungkook’s performance. Your eyes silently follow him as he sheepishly walk out of the platform, going onto the same path he took before.
Jungkook didn’t meet your gaze as he strutted toward the ice cooler on the side of the buffet table to get a bottle of alcohol which is just a few steps away from you. Twisting open its cap with such urgency, he took a long swig from the bottle to calm his traitor nerves, then pretends to busy himself on the variety of food laid on the table while feeling the weight of your stare on his back. Nervous that you understood the purpose behind his impromptu performance and that your silence was your hint of your rejection to his feelings, he didn’t try to talk it out to you the entire night. Yet, he feigned indifference when he sat on the same chair in the table next to you.
As the rest of the night rolls, the tension undeniably grows in between you two. Yet bearable enough to have you two stay glued on your seats despite the countless times you caught him staring at you, or you at him all throughout the night.
None of you dared break the silence and somehow, along the way, the tension has particularly become unbearable inside the car while he drove you home. Your house was just two blocks away and you bet it would take him faster to get there should he not intentionally slow down his driving with only a hand on a steering wheel while the other rested on the open window of his door as his fingers anxiously pinch his lips.
You chose to break the tension, feeling the need to speak up before your heart bursts out of your chest. And the moment you did, Jungkook coincidentally started to talk too.
“So…”
“About that…”
You met his eyes when your head jerked to the side to peer at him.
“What?” You immediately ask, curious to know what he would want to say after that, his heartfelt singing.
“Uh—“ He drawls, suddenly losing the words he was supposed to utter the second he made an eye contact with you. He shifts his eyes back to the road, feeling himself cower under the weight of your stare.
He clears his throat, putting up a pretense of a courage. “What do you think of... my performance?”
There was a moment of dead air inside before you manage to form an answer. “It was beautiful… I like it. You know I’m in love with y-you– I mean your voice. I love your voice.” You laugh awkwardly, while you’re incoherently screaming in your head at your almost slipped up.
Jungkook’s face flushes and he could already visualize the sudden boost of serotonin in his system hearing the validation he needs the most, the one coming from you. “Thank you.” He mumbles shyly.
It was that moment when the car arrives in front of your house. You shoot him a look, said your thanks and bid him goodbye before you climbed out of the car. You couldn’t deny the disappointment that was rushing so abruptly into you while you pad the distance across the gate of the house. For the nth time, you have hoped for something that was not even real to begin with.
However, your heart jumped out of almost joy when you heard Jungkook’s voice call your name out just as you’re about to close the fence gate.
“What’s up?”
“Okay before I tell you something, do you promise to remain best friends with me if… if you don’t… if somehow… oh god whatever— just promise me!” He panics, making you frown in return.
“I-I promise?” You say in an uncertain tone.
Jungkook held his pinky out.
“Pinky swear?” He prompts. You raise an eyebrow but let him hook your pinky finger with his to seal the promise of a lifetime friendship.
“What is it?” You say in the most gentle way possible. If this is the moment you’ve been dreaming to happen since you were in high school, you have to encourage him to talk before you could stop yourself from advancing to his personal space just to kiss him without any further ado.
“_____I-I tried my best not to… n-not to see you in a different way. But god you’re always making it difficult for me to forget about it when you keep giving me reasons to want things I shouldn’t have–”
“Jungkook–”
“Please, let me finish before my legs give out.”
You chuckle all the while your vision blurs from the moisture in your eyes. The anxiety on his face gradually dissolves into relief when he saw the smile creeping into your face.
“I can’t keep dating anyone and pretending they’re better than you. I’m an idiot, I know. But it’s always been you, ______. It’s you that I want and I can’t possibly live this life without you–“ You didn’t let him finish when he finally said the words you have longed to hear for years. You lean in to touch his soft, inviting lips with your own.
Jungkook staggered back at the suddenness of your move. Once he had recovered from shock, he cupped your jaw to deepen the kiss. He sighed against your supple lips. And for the first time since he has nurtured his feelings for you, the weight in his chest has been lifted off, replacing it with warmth and relief that only you could bring in his longing heart.
*unedited
mintseesaw © 2020 | photo credit
#jungkook x reader#jungkook fluff#bayanihanboost#paralumanplaylist#btsguild#goldenclosetnet#btswritingcafe#bangtanarmynet#btsbookclub#cypherwritersnet#jungkook imagines#jungkook scenarios#jungkook fanfic#jungkook drabble#friends to lovers trope
273 notes
·
View notes
Text
fanfic writer tag game <3
helloooo <3 thank u for tagging me @hannie-dul-set this is so cute lol
ummmm! i think i will tag. @leejuyeeon and @seokmingiggles !! and as always anyone else who wants to <33
peum ~
1. what fandoms have you written for (but do not currently)?
omg lets see if i can do this in order. i think the first fandom i ever wrote fanfic for was creepypasta LMAOO and then... fairy tail? then 5 seconds of summer, then maybe it 2017?? voltron legendary defender, detroit become human, monster prom and mystic messenger kind of overlapped, the arcana !!! then my hero academia, haikyuu, a Little bit of demon slayer... i think thats it lol
2. what fandoms are you currently writing for?
seventeen is all for rn, but i’m thinking of also writing for mha again and adding jjk!!
3. how long have you been writing?
oh wow for like... probably around 6 years? maybe 6 and a half
4. on which platforms do you post your stories?
rn just tumblr, i used to post more actively on ao3 but i havent since i started writing for kpop
5. what is your favourite genre to write?
ahhh like !!! comfort fics!!! i think theres something really sweet in those unspoken feelings during moments you think you’ll never forget... the idea of being with someone and you’re just so sure they’re your favorite person, and then warmth that comes with that realization... wahh
6. are you a pantser or a planner?
oh it depends i think. for longer fics i like to plan them out, but i really wing it with like timestamps or shorter ones
7. one shot or multi-chapter?
ONE SHOTS. my god i fucking suck at multi-chapter shit LMAOO ive only done 1 series like that and it was so rough for me lol
8. what is the perfect chapter length in your opinion?
hm how do i explain this... anything that makes sense? however long it takes for it to feel like the chapter/fic is summed up or completed. i used to worry about word counts a lot but now i rarely pay attention to them, both in reading and writing
9. what is your longest published story? is it complete?
if we’re talking about multi-chaptered, then the color of you wins at 17k !! in terms of one shots, it’s for now; forever at 9k!
10. which story did you enjoy working on the most?
oh boy. i think... anything from the last like. 8 months? my svt stuff for sure!! i went a while without writing in between like january-late november 2020, and i was worried that my writing would suffer a lot... it took a sec for me to get back into the groove of things but i’m feeling happier than ever with the stuff i write now. i feel like ive matured about the way i approach my own writing and ideas, and how i do everything, and my fics make me really proud. ive started writing within different aus that i hadnt touched before, or talking about different feelings or ideas, etc... i really feel like ive grown with this most recent burst lol, and i love working on them! i get so hyped up when im in the middle of writing or even planning, im just so excited to share all of it hehe
11. favorite request you've have written and why (if any?)
ah its been so long since ive worked with requests that i cant remember anything LOL
12. are there reoccurring themes in your stories?
yes. it is comfort and content. it is the feeling of love. it is holding hands on a walk in the middle of spring and smelling flowers. it is the sound of leaves when a gust of wind blows past. it is looking into ur lovers eyes and feeling nothing but pure fondness
13. current number of wips?
fuck like somewhere around 20 probably
14. three things you have noticed about your own writing?
i really like repetition (specifically in sentences if that makes sense??), LOTS of unspoken things (even if i picture a fic with an established relationship, i dont say it within the fic; and especially concerning romantic feelings, i love when things go unsaid and are FELT full force), i think a lot of detailed rambling... i really like to try and describe emotions and stuff in the most abstract and obscure ways lol i feel like it makes things a little more palpable and honest
15. a quote you like from a published story
im gonna do a few. Lol. firstly this long one from pretend people can unlearn:
“Are you…” Jeonghan starts, and when you look at him, his eyes are still on the city in front of you. “Are you ever afraid that we’ll fall out of love?”
It never occurred to you that this was love. It’s not like the love you’ve experienced in the past, not even close. But maybe… maybe that’s why you never leave, why you hold yourself back from certain arguments like it might fix everything. Maybe love is the reason why Jeonghan still seems to believe in you. Why he promises he’ll be the best thing for you despite always breaking that promise.
(Is it love, a voice in your head questions, or is it longing?)
It takes you a while to respond. “I don’t know,” you end up saying, because you really don’t. Jeonghan turns his head and looks at you, and you half expect him to start an argument in the middle of night, out on the street like this. It wouldn’t be the first time. “Would that… be okay?”
“I don’t know,” Jeonghan answers, just like you. His voice is soft. You want to reach for his hand just to hold it. “You’re still…”
He pauses, like he’s trying to find the right word. You let him take his time, for once, instead of accusing him of the worst. “I’m still?”
“Everything,” he tells you. He looks so sad and you reach out for him because it’s the only thing you can offer. You think the worst thing about your relationship with Jeonghan is that you will always believe him when he gets like this, just like you’ll believe him when he takes it back in the heat of a fight.
next is from like there isn’t something missing <3
But you’re crying into his chest because it’s not you, and it’s not him. Seungcheol wonders if it was always meant to be like this, if the two of you were always meant to part or if something… if something just went wrong, somewhere. A bump that did a bit more damage than either of you thought.
He tries not to think about it now. Tears fill his own eyes as he presses a kiss to your hair because he loved you. He truly did.
“I was so lucky to love you,” he murmurs, voice a cracked whisper. “I’m so happy I got the chance.”
When Seungcheol wakes up the next morning in an empty bed, he’s not surprised. But the Post-It note that’s dressed in your handwriting…
Well. It’s over.
and this last one from only for you, i will dance !!
“This will always be our own time,” he says. “We’ll meet here.”
You know. He says it every time. It never fails to make your heart soar.
“Our thirteenth month,” you say, just like every time. Chan smiles.
He kisses you so strong you feel yourself falling.
16. a quote from an unpublished story
ahh ok ill do a few here too!!! one is something ive begun writing, the other is one that i’ve just been working on planning out <3
Smoke blows past somebody else’s lips and partially obstructs Wonwoo’s view of you.
He hasn’t been to a party like this in a long time. It’s elegant, more of a gala than anything. He can’t remember who threw it or for what reason. It doesn’t really matter, he supposes, watching you make conversation with the partygoers. They all have old money to throw around, the symbolism stitched into their suit jackets and red-rimmed heels; remnants of it left on tables and in the contents of expensive cigars.
You play them like you are one of them, tell them the right things with a silver tongue. Wonwoo always watches, plays the part of an observer. It’s impressive, the way you float around the room like it’s nothing.
Wonwoo observes; Wonwoo knows things.
and the second one...
"you don't know me," you respond. your voice carries no bite, just a fact, and joshua knows this
"i want to," he says after a second. "if you'll let me."
and he's asking permission to be your friend, to be close to you, something so tender and strangely polite
it makes you feel almost sad
"don't expect too much," you say, a little teasing. joshua only smiles
17. space for you to say something to your readers
wahhh thank you all so much!!! when i first got into writing for kpop it was a lot different mostly because i think... i was writing stuff for different anime before, and i had built up a big following because of that and my works always did like, really exceptional in terms of notes and feedback and such, and getting into kpop... has been rough on that end 💀 but i appreciate your support thus far, even if it’s small... i’m still working towards a standard that i have for myself!!! so please be patient with me, thank you for the support !!
also please find it in yourself to leave lil comments or any sort of feedback... please..... PLEASE... any creator ever understands this struggle please always try to do this!!! for me and for any other creator you follow and enjoy content from <333
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
YOUR ALIAS & NICKNAMES — james bt usually its spelled JAMES bt irl i’ve been called jimbo and jam and jammies and jimjam n w/e endearing terms bc i am precious
AGE — 20
TIMEZONE — est
PREFERRED PRONOUNS — she/they bt the she is more out of convenience fr others n also nothing bothers me
MBTI — istp i share this with bri and also my character viktor bt ive also gotten infp before i think which is almost the complete opposite so! take tht as u will
HP HOUSE — oh wait i actually know this i took a fckn quiz hold on. ok i took this fucker right here and i got burned gryffindor primary, model hufflepuff primary, gryffindor secondary, n model hufflepuff secondary which boils down 2 ... i dont know
ARE YOU A STUDENT? WHAT DO YOU STUDY? — technically yes but i havent taken a class in a year bt i used to be a social work major n then i was gna switch to english n then i wanted to do environmental / coastal / marine biology / science bt then i realized i cant do math so idk
ARE YOU ENJOYING IT? — i was :/
LINKS TO OTHER ACCOUNTS & SOCIAL MEDIA — i dont like being perceived bt my twitter is @fauxcherub and my pinterest is @offbrandsodapop / big tid and im too lazy 2 link them so im sry bt also my rph is @svrgcnts n my theme is unfinished ignore it
DISCORD USER — sniff#3644 i think
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE FICTION GENRE? — i like modern fantasy / urban fantasy just like. modern magic. modern. bt mostly fr books. fr like films n tv shows i dont know i binge watch gossip girl and eat several oranges
TOP FIVE FAVOURITE FILMS — i ...... dont know .... pride n prejudice, austin powers, halloweentown n co’, the princess bride, the princess diaries or ella enchanted
A BOOK YOU FEEL “CHANGED” YOU? — i read the darkest minds when i was a freshmen in high school and it was the first book that ever made me cry and i think it unlocked the part of me that genuinely feels emotion because ever since i read it i cry multiple times a week to every single day at like. everything. so. its not even a revolutionary book i just really liked it
A MOVIE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? — probably pride n prejudice i wont lie but also if something stars mike myers chances r that its on my mind
WHAT IS YOUR SIGN? — aquarius sun, aquarius moon, cancer rising
ARE YOU INTO ASTROLOGY? — not 2 the point where i hate u if ur a gemini i just think its fun 2 b like ‘haha i do that’
WHAT PLATFORMS HAVE YOU ROLEPLAYED ON? — facebook n club penguin
WHAT OTHER HOBBIES DO YOU HAVE? — im a shell of a person.
HAVE ANY PETS? IF SO, TALK ABOUT THEM! — harley n bodhi i love them and so do u harley is a pit mix maybe possibly idk? and bodhi’s a shiba and theyre opposites. harley is so nice. bodhi is an asshole. i love them so much
IS THERE A TV SHOW YOU RECOMMEND A LOT? — i rly liked fleabag but schitt’s creek mostly. i also liked the politician but i want to punt ryan murphy so. i think the haunting of hill house is also a good show
ANY SHOWS YOU LIKE SOME MIGHT BE SURPRISED TO HEAR THAT YOU DO? — i think im too predictable bt if anybody wants to tell me the answer to this please do
WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? WOULD YOU RECOMMEND IT? — god i think i was reading strange the dreamer by laini taylor or smth like that bt ya i was enjoying it even though i stopped halfway thru and havent picked it up in a year
CURRENTLY READING? — i cant read
LAST FILM? REC IT? — the joker and no.
THREE MOVIES YOU NEED TO WATCH — practical magic bt i told myself i wouldnt watch it until i do my replies, perks of being a wallflower, n uuuhhh beautiful boy (thank u neen)
WHAT MOVIE DO YOU THINK YOU’VE SEEN THE MOST TIMES? — austin powers or halloweentown or shrek i wont lie its probably shrek yeah its shrek
WHAT ALWAYS PUTS YOU IN A GOOD MOOD? — the gc usually :/
WHO IS YOUR FAVOURITE MUSICIAN / BAND? LIST IF THERE ARE MORE THAN ONE. — lady lamb bt im mad at her bc she hasnt toured to florida and all i want is to see her live bt im really feeling bay faction lately bt also mcr bc im emo but im kind of a few songs frm every artist type of person n not like entire discographies except fr the bands ive just listed
WILD NIGHT OUT OR QUIET NIGHT IN? — house parties r cool bt i like 2 be. in bed most of the time
ANY PHOBIAS? — none tht i can recall atm bt i have a lot of anxieties in general :/
DO YOU LIKE BUGS? — depends on the bug ...
BIRDS? — mostly no but ig it depends on the bird ... i like them frm afar bt their talons scare me
ARE YOU A CAT OR DOG PERSON? BOTH? — im v allergic to cats bt i want a cat so mf badly. but also ig im a dog person bc ive. always owned a dog
BIGGEST PET PEEVE? — like. not being self aware. passive aggression. the rpc
FAVOURITE THING ABOUT THE RPC? — this is a trick question
TOP TEN FAVE FCS TO USE? — dev patel, avan jogia, natalia dyer, bill skarsgard, medalion rahimi, naomi scott, ella purnell, freya mavor, liana liberato, sky ferreira.
FIVE YOU LIKE WRITING AGAINST? — i dnt rly focus on the fcs of other muses so i dnt think i can answer this. austin butler.
FAVOURITE TYPE OF FOOD? — mexican food i would eat it everyday if i could
WORST FOOD? — i think sushi is gross
DO YOU PLAY VIDEOGAMES? IF SO, WHAT ONES AND ON WHAT PLATFORM DO YOU PREFER? — not frequently. i like the bioshock like. series. universe. bt i like point n click adventures a lot ... deponia is my favorite game series theres like four of them n ive finished them in 8 consecutive hours each. i only use pc
ANYTHING ELSE YOU’D LIKE TO SHARE WITH THE TAG? — im so sleepy
LASTLY, HOW DID YOU FIND US? — drama SJNKDFMG
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
TASK OO1 / OOC SURVEY.
[kermit voice] hallo.... its me
YOUR ALIAS & NICKNAMES — nora
AGE — 23
TIMEZONE — gmt
PREFERRED PRONOUNS — she/her
MBTI — enfp-infp border cos im an introvert who Masquerades as an extrovert :)
HP HOUSE — i spent 10 yrs of my life thinkin i was gryffindor.... to find out.... huffle....puff......
ARE YOU A STUDENT? WHAT DO YOU STUDY? — i fuckin wish! being a student was dope af i got stressed about essays like once a month and apart from that i was just chillin, surrounded by really intelligent people every day n livin it up on the party scene. adult life fucking sucks no one wants to have fun cos we all work fuckin tonnes of hours so we can afford to eat and get paid peanuts xx
ARE YOU ENJOYING IT? — im really afraid of bein one of those jock types who peaked in high school but i deff peaked in uni like 100% i was way more interesting 2 years ago
LINKS TO OTHER ACCOUNTS & SOCIAL MEDIA — im not showin u my instagram bc im a fuckin embarassment but this is pinterest , this is my personal blog, this is my writing / 1x1 blog i never use any more n this is my trash talking twitter where i mostly just cry about timothee chalamet and bash the tories.
DISCORD USER — kristine’s forehead vein#8664
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE FICTION GENRE? — i dont read fanfiction much but when i do u can be sure it’s slow burn angsty enemies to lovers mutual pining heart attack every time one of them accidentally brushes the other’s hand
TOP FIVE FAVOURITE FILMS — suspiria (2018 luca guadagnino version rogue i kno but i prefer the remake), the lobster, before sunrise, baz luhrmann romeo + juliet, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, thoroughbreds (REC!! so underwatched pls watch it. compelling female characters), hunt for the wilderpeople (also so underwatched), swiss army man, call me by your name, atonement, moonrise kingdom, trainspotting, the florida project. i rlly like films ok
A BOOK YOU FEEL “CHANGED” YOU? — the song of achilles by madeline miller n also fen by daisy johnson
A MOVIE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? — booksmart cos its fuckin dope
WHAT IS YOUR SIGN? — libra
ARE YOU INTO ASTROLOGY? — i like to pretend im super invested in it mostly to anger my friends but tbh.... i just use it as a rough guide for character creation.... its fun but i dnt .... fully invest in what it has to say..... altho i am the most unbalanced n indecisive bitch on earth so i guess they got that right !! i just live to please baybeyy!
WHAT PLATFORMS HAVE YOU ROLEPLAYED ON? — tumblr for about 8 year (omg) n before tht facebook..... i was very embarassingly in a twilight rp..... i wrote jane..... i also rped as a scene kid oc n when i was like 12 i was on some weird forum harry potter roleplay where i basically played a self insert with georgie henley as the fc......
WHAT OTHER HOBBIES DO YOU HAVE? — i used to have so many hobbies but now i jst lie in my bed staring at the ceiling. but before i was workin like a dog i loved reading, writing, acting in theatre productions..... going out on the town getting bevved..... big druggy EDM nights in warehouses tht probably weren’t liscenced for tht many ppl..... gigs... costume-design and making, spoken word poetry, acrylic painting n rollerskating but my sister broke my skates abt two years ago in vengeance and i’ll never forgive her that fuckin bitch
HAVE ANY PETS? IF SO, TALK ABOUT THEM! — no my landlord is a fascist
IS THERE A TV SHOW YOU RECOMMEND A LOT? — i’ll never stop reccing euphoria!! also i was pleasantly surprised by looking for alaska!! but i also rlly like bob’s burgers, parks and rec, good omens.... black mirror, n sharp objects. lovesick on bbciplayer (n netflix i think) is also rlly fun
ANY SHOWS YOU LIKE SOME MIGHT BE SURPRISED TO HEAR THAT YOU DO? — maybe love island, idk if i talk abt that much bc i am ashamed but i am so obsessed with it. i even got the love island game n got so invested in my fictional relationship w bobby tht i had to delete it
WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? WOULD YOU RECOMMEND IT? — god god... i haven’t finished a book in ages.... i recently started reading milkman by anna burns, the bees by laline paull and everything under by daisy johnson.... bt the last book i read cover to cover was probs circe. defs read it. feminist and witchy
CURRENTLY READING? — i jst said this but the bees, everything under and less so milkman cos im finding milkman a bit tough
LAST FILM? REC IT? — i watched ladyworld the lord of the flies all-female remake n even maya hawke could not save it.... dnt get me wrong from an art film point of view i loved it but it felt a bit underdeveloped n a level media studies for me..... apart from tht?? the runaways (yorkshire film not released yet at a preview screening) and threads (also a yorkshire film from the 80s about nuclear apocalypse)
THREE MOVIES YOU NEED TO WATCH — portrait of a lady on fire, i work at an independent cinema n we recently had a preview screening and everyone said it was SICK, uhhhh short term 12, n the new eliza scanlen movie babyteeth
WHAT MOVIE DO YOU THINK YOU’VE SEEN THE MOST TIMES? — madagascar because when i was 12 my parents bought me a little television with a dvd player in it for my birthday and madagascar was the only dvd i owned for like..... the first two years of havin the absolute luxury of a tv in my room so i just used to watch it all the time n i now basically know the script inside out
WHAT ALWAYS PUTS YOU IN A GOOD MOOD? — nothing, life is pointless n i hate fun, let me rot in peace
WHO IS YOUR FAVOURITE MUSICIAN / BAND? LIST IF THERE ARE MORE THAN ONE. — ughhh god probably lcd soundsystem. gorillaz, the streets, tame impala, talking heads, soft hair, i also love lizz tho n also angry twangy guitar girl bands like girlpool, courtney barnett, best coast, cherry glazerr,
WILD NIGHT OUT OR QUIET NIGHT IN? — quiet night in my party days are over i cant even be bothered to go to the shops if its past 4.30pm and dark these days
ANY PHOBIAS? — clowns n rats
DO YOU LIKE BUGS? — absolutely not
BIRDS? — yes but not if they fly in my face
ARE YOU A CAT OR DOG PERSON? BOTH? — i love both i want one
BIGGEST PET PEEVE? — tory middle aged boomers who treat me like actual shit on their shoe because i work in the service industry like thats my choice and their poor economic decisions didnt mean i have to do a shitty job to afford to live bcos of austerity n cuts to arts funding meaning i cant get a job writing unless i self-fund :)))
FAVOURITE THING ABOUT THE RPC? — that everyone ive met through rp is a fuckin LAFF
TOP TEN FAVE FCS TO USE? — god .... diana silvers, timothee chalamet, margaret qualley, kristine froseth, froy gutierrez, zendaya, elle fanning, astrid berges frisbey, hunter schafer, leonardo dicaprio
FIVE YOU LIKE WRITING AGAINST? — herman tomeraas, hunter schafer, saoirse ronan, timothee chalamet, froy gutierrez
FAVOURITE TYPE OF FOOD? — linda mccartney 1/2pounder mozzarella veggie burgers, sweet potato wedges, tomato soup, mozzarella sticks, brownies
WORST FOOD? — green things like broccoli n sprouts gross. baked beans cos as a kid ppl used to do baked bean baths for comic relief / red nosed day a lot n i thought when they were finished in the baked bean bath they just put all the cold beans back in the tin. actually anything small that moves around on your plate. peas. spaghetti. sweetcorn. i dont like small things i cant control.
DO YOU PLAY VIDEOGAMES? IF SO, WHAT ONES AND ON WHAT PLATFORM DO YOU PREFER? — last year my housemate had an xbox n i went through a phase of obsessively playin fable 3 it was amazing. i had like 5 husbands and 3 wives and loads of kids but they all ended up leavin me cos i spent so much time out doing quests neglecting them
ANYTHING ELSE YOU’D LIKE TO SHARE WITH THE TAG? — this
LASTLY, HOW DID YOU FIND US? — im one of those bitches who was in this grp all the way back when it was swipe... so quirky and original!! i knew the band before u! anyway im goin now this has been sufficiently embarassing..... i am lame
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
1. Do you bite or lick ice cream? Lick
2. What is home to you? Alabama:/
3. What was the last lie you told? I couldnt tell you
4. Does everyone deserve the truth? Maybe not?
6. Describe a moment in which you did something unacceptable in a bad situation. Walk away, move states..
7. List two things that are more easily done than said. (No, I didn't mix them up.) Being alone & fuck irdk
8. When was the last time you worked really hard to achieve something? Mhm 4 years ago.
9. How many all nighters have you pulled? A lotttt haha
10. If humans didn't evolve to laugh or smile, how would we express our happiness instead? Woah people express that? no but humans would probably bone all the time.
11. How many romantic "things" or "flings" have you had? Only 2 (technically 3) serious relationships. Many flings.
12. What is your paradise? I dont have one :(
13. What is your favorite background noise? (Ex. Water dripping, people talking.) Music
14. How many hearts do you think you have broken? Only 1... maybe 2 soon. (not you hehe.)
15. What is the most important thing about electronics? What does this say about you? Finding friendships through social media or other platforms. And mhm probably that im a lonely pos
16. Why do people care about celebrities? Do you care about celebrities? Because they're pretty. Not really.
17. What is the most annoying thing someone can do to you? Chew loud.
18. Do you overexaggerate? What are the pros and cons of this? Eh, yeah. And I cant think of any pros.
19. Have you played any instruments before? Which instruments? Piano, saxophone
20. Do you like taking selfies? Why or why not? No. I stare at it until i hate it.
21. List 3 things you like about yourself?
22. What is the best advice someone has ever given you? To not give up. As simple as that sounds.
23. Do you have what it takes to raise a child? Why or why not? No. Dont you need to be mentally stable- i would hope so..
24. How do you cheer yourself up after a bad day? Play games for hours.
25. When was the last time you felt awkward? Ha. Literally 5 minutes ago.
26. Are you introverted or extroverted? Or a mixture of both? Introverted x100000
27. What constitutes a good friend? Someone who doesnt give up on you amd atleast tries to understand.
28. Would you rather have a lot of friends to hang out with or just one best friend? One best friend.
29. In a regular day, what do you not want to hear? 'Hey hows your day going'
30. What is your dream job? Fuck, is this still a question.. to be a homicide detective in the biggest city i can think of.
31. Is it better to be lazy but smart or hardworking but unintelligent? Lazy and smart DUH
32. What is a truth about yourself that others find hard to believe?
33. What have you always wondered about the other gender? What it feels like to GET OFF. DUH.
34. Which fantasy world would you like to visit the most? Um my own dreams i guess.
35. Describe the worst friend you have ever befriended. Im not wasting my time describing that.
36. Imagine that you have switched bodies with someone you don't know. You can't switch back. What do you do? Live it up. I think id feel happy honestly.
37. If you found the recipe for immortality, would you sell it or would you burn it? Mh. Sell it, their problem now and im rich.
38. What is the most important, applicable class you have ever taken? Current events.
39. Name the last book you read. Dammed- chuck palahniuk
40. Imagine that you are unable to express emotion. How would this affect your world? No change
41. When was the last time you made the first move? Um never..
42. What is your opinion on electronic music such as dubstep or trap? Trash
43. What was the last tv show youve watched? Rick and Morty.
44. Do you like and appreciate your life? I appreciate what i am trying to do.
45. Do you like and appreciate yourself?
46. When was the last time you cried? Yesterday
47. What are you scared of? Heights.
48. What is the most embarrassing, cringe-worthy thing you have ever done? Um live my life everyday probably.
49. What are some of your hobbies? .... literally WORSE question. I smoke cigs. Is that a hobby?
50. What is a superficial yet annoying mistake you constantly make?
51. Are you a good friend? What makes you a good friend? If not, what makes you a bad friend? I feel like i am both. I try to be there for them. But also, im so hard to get so i feel like i might come off the wrong way a lot.
52. Do you honestly learn from your mistakes? Honestly; nope.
53. What have you learned the hard way? Not to care what people think. After wasting my whole life. Im starting to realize it doesnt matter.
54. What is the most important thing to have in order to attain happiness? Follow your heart
56. Are you a creative or a logical thinker? Both but probably logical.
57. What is the smartest thing you have ever done?
58. What is your ideal meal? Fuckk probably so good ass chicken with some gooooood asssssss mac and cheese. As lame as that sounds hahaha.
59. What is the worst thing someone could do on a date? 1. Go on date with me
60. Do you like animals? Which kind is your favorite? Yeah and dogs are cute but i love elephants.
61. If you could turn one legal thing illegal, what would it be? Christmas.
62. Do you have any guilty pleasures? Of courseeeee (;
63. What is the best thing that the internet has ever created? Video games.
64. Do you like playing video games? Which video games? Woah you read my mind of sum? Shooter games.
65. What is your opinion on beauty in today's society? Bullshit
66. Are you a morning person? When do you usually wake up? No not really and like 5pm nowadays.
67. Do you have a favorite Disney movie? Character? No
68. Would you rather live in the city or in the countryside? City but i love the countryside
69. Would you rather live near the ocean or in the mountains? Mountains
70. What are the best things about winter? Cold. Even though i hate it. Snow. Even if i dont see it. Trees dying.
71. What scares you most about the future? Literally everything.
72. What makes you feel old? Doing nothing.
73. How many hours do you spend on the computer or phone on average? Idk like 5.
74. What are some of your New Year's resolutions? Be a better me.
75. What is your life story in 6 words?
76. Describe yourself in one word. Awkward.
77. What bad habits do you do? Smoking
78. What genre of music do you listen to? everything
79. Most prominent childhood memory? I would say, but its embarrassing that that's the memory.
80. Imagine if you had an older brother. If you already have one, what is it like? If you don't, how would this change your life? My life would be so different. Maybe i would have someone to talk to.
81. Spirit animal?
82. Do you believe in horoscopes? Yes
83. What is the worst advice you've ever been given?
84. List the 3 most important people in your life right now. 1. Fox 2. Fox 3. Fox
85. Favorite memory of your family. :/
86. What do you look for in a relationship? Happiness
87. Do you have a role model? Why or why not? No. I dont need it. But now that i think about it i have one role model.
88. What is your opinion on social media? Dumb
89. Are you a pessimist or an optimist? Pessimest
90. List some things that you think are overpriced? Food
91. What is your worst memory or creepiest experience? ..
92. What superpower would ruin the world? Any of them
93. What is something you swore you would never do when you grew up, but you did anyway? Exactly what im doing now. Nothing. Giving up. Dropping out
94. What lessons have you learned from movies and which movies were they? Dont trust yourself when you know you arent okay. Fight club
95. If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? Europe
96. How do you approach people? I dont but i guess a smile.
97. What is your opinion on first impressions? I think theyre okay. Only if you dont judge.
98. What are some things you did as a child that you no longer do? Lol play with imaginary friends
99. What languages can you speak? English
100. What do you think society will be like in 30 years? Lol hopefully ill be dead bc that shit sounds terrible
101. What do you do on your lazy days? Play games.
102. What ended your last relationship? I had enough.
103. Favorite food? Soul food
104. What is the most terrifying dream you've ever had? Fuck im not saying.
105. When was the last time you got seriously angry? Last night
106. What was the last friendship you broke? My friend Ashley:(
107. Do you have any pet peeves? Close minded people
108. Who was the last person you gave a hug to? Zack
109. When was the last time you got seriously stressed? Last night
110. What part of your personality do you want to change? I dont have one.
111. Who is the most positively influential person in your life right now? My sister Grace.
112. What is your biggest motivation? My siblings. Faith & Grace.
113. What did you want to be when you were little? Honestly i never knew.
114. What are some things that you are good at? Smokin weed
115. What is one thing you want to be good at? Social skills
116. What distracts you the most, especially when you're trying to work? My mind
117. How important is privacy to you? Eh pretty significant i guess.
118. If you could create one social norm, what would it be? Be friends with everybody.
119. What's the craziest lie you've ever told? Um.. i told my 2nd grade teacher my family died in a car crash.
120. What story do you like to tell about yourself at parties? I dont go to parties haaha
121. What is the lamest thing that you have seen someone do? have friends and socialize too much like woah calm down you know youre still alone.. right. Like its only you. Hahah jk. But irdk.
122. What is the stupidest thing you've done to impress someone? a guy invited me over and ive never done anything sexual before so i pretended like i knew and i hurt his dick like bad. (We didnt have sex)
123. What is your morning routine? Wake up, wash face, brush teeth, get dressed, and then boom feel sad
124. What's the last thing you did that is worth remembering?
125. If karma was coming back to you, would it help or hurt you? Help
126. What is your opinion on playing "hard to get?" Being sort of isolated like not opening up. Which is okay bc if they want you they'll wait.
127. What are the pros and cons of straightforward? Cons, you may hurt feelings. Pro, you know yourself and what you want to say congratulations
128. What do you consider "leading" someone on? Being fake happy.
129. Are you the friendzoner or the friendzoned? Friendzoner
130. What do you admire most about your friends? How beautiful he is. Inside & out.
131. What do you admire most about your family? They're still here.
132. What is your opinion on "going with the flow?" You may forget where you are trying to go. Or who you are.
133. Do you enjoy talking or listening? Listening.
134. When is it time to end a friendship? Idk
135. What is the worst excuse you've ever come up with? Lol too many.
136. If GPA didn't matter, what courses would you have taken? Doesnt matter.
137. What are your favorite baby names? Ive always liked Riley for a girl name and idk havent thought Bout a boys name.
138. When was the last time you had a deep conversation with someone? Maybe a week or so ago. Or a few days ago.
139. What instantly ruins a conversation? Lack of excitement
140. Biggest turn ons and turn on offs. Affection. And idk
143. When did you last do something outside of your comfort zone? God every day.
147. What do you like about the 21st century? ???
141. Biggest disappointment. Myself
142. Do you have any self-restraint? A little.
144. Prized possession(s)? little things
145. What is your opinion on second chances? They might seem okay but idk.... depends i guess
146. Text or call? Both, depends on whom im texting or callin
148. What advice would you give to yourself 5 years ago? Life is hard and stupid but choices you make will stay with you forever so what are you gonna do, follow your heart or head? (head is better hope)
149. How organized are you? Eh not really anymore.
150. Favorite mode of transportation. My car
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
– task 001 : ooc survey
YOUR ALIAS & NICKNAMES — sam !
AGE — 22
TIMEZONE — aest babey
PREFERRED PRONOUNS — she/her
MBTI — um i have no freakin idea except definitely introvert, i would do the test but i woke up like ten minutes ago so i am no functional enough for that rn lmao
HP HOUSE — now listen i wanted to be a ravenclaw when i was 11 so i believe i have to stick to that, based on my values and who i think i am now i think it’d be more hufflepuff but 11 yr old me wanted to be the smartest bitch around so im a ravenclaw
ARE YOU A STUDENT? WHAT DO YOU STUDY? — i used to be, i graduated last year i studied film and television
ARE YOU ENJOYING IT? — ya! it was a lot of fun and i got to make a lot of cool stuff ! made a film that won best student horror at toronto short film festival so that was really fucking exciting
LINKS TO OTHER ACCOUNTS & SOCIAL MEDIA — im @spookyrps and on weheartit and pinterest
DISCORD USER — im scared of bots so not gonna put the whole thing but im skelesam in the chat
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE FICTION GENRE? — horror, thriller, anything crazy and ridiculous and fun. starting to like comedies a lot now too but it really depends on how its made
TOP FIVE FAVOURITE FILMS — oh boi um booksmart, the martian, whiplash, god help the girl, and the scooby doo movie. theres a million others i could put there but im just gonna go with the first five that came to mind or else i’ll be here all day (special shoutouts: bad times at the el royale, hereditary & midsommar, the new it movies, jennifer’s body, clue, the barkley marathons, harry potter series, se7en, and the saw franchise)
A BOOK YOU FEEL “CHANGED” YOU? — the night circus by erin morgenstern
A MOVIE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? — the room lmao
WHAT IS YOUR SIGN? — aquarius babey
ARE YOU INTO ASTROLOGY? — i dont like follow it but i do like to read up on them and use the signs to help build my characters (eg. lukas is a scorpio and drea is an aquarius too)
WHAT PLATFORMS HAVE YOU ROLEPLAYED ON? — almost exclusively tumblr but i was in a forum rp back in like 2009 or something lmao
WHAT OTHER HOBBIES DO YOU HAVE? — i do a lot of stuff based around film making, like everything from script writing/reading, production design, filming, editing, thats what i love to do. and i wanna be a gamer but i have a shit computer and very limited hand eye coordination lmaoo
HAVE ANY PETS? IF SO, TALK ABOUT THEM! — ya ! i have a black cat named zelda who is admittedly a lil .... thicc. i love her so much and she barely tolerates me. she grooms me and my roommate bc i think she thinks she’s our mom and like she is tbh
IS THERE A TV SHOW YOU RECOMMEND A LOT? — search party, its so fucking good and funny and crazy and i love it. if u like zany comedies with a lil mystery, its really fun. big broad city vibes
ANY SHOWS YOU LIKE SOME MIGHT BE SURPRISED TO HEAR THAT YOU DO? — um i dont think so, i think i’m very predictable in my media consumption lmao
WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? WOULD YOU RECOMMEND IT? — bro its been so long since i finished a book, i think it was the miseducation of cameron post by emily m danforth. idk if i would recommend it, i think it depends what ur after from a book bc this was VERY DEPRESSING and threw my little bi ass through the ringer lol
CURRENTLY READING? — jonathon van ness’ autobiography over the top: a raw journey to self love (im rlly enjoying it so far)
LAST FILM? REC IT? — not technically a film but i watched unnatural selection on netflix last night and it fucked me up and i need everyone else to watch it so i can talk about it
THREE MOVIES YOU NEED TO WATCH — gattaca bc of the unnatural selection viewing lmao, the cat and the moon to support my boi alex wolff, and knives out bc it looks so fucking good i wanna see it so bad
WHAT MOVIE DO YOU THINK YOU’VE SEEN THE MOST TIMES? — harry potter and the philospher’s stone probably. i used to watch it multiple times a year and now i watch it at least once
WHAT ALWAYS PUTS YOU IN A GOOD MOOD? — watching my fave stand up comedies lol. go tos are john mulaney and bo burnham
WHO IS YOUR FAVOURITE MUSICIAN / BAND? LIST IF THERE ARE MORE THAN ONE. — all time fave is the front bottoms but a more recent fave is rex orange county
WILD NIGHT OUT OR QUIET NIGHT IN? — quiet night in
ANY PHOBIAS? — not really
DO YOU LIKE BUGS? — fuck no but i dont really lose my shit over them
BIRDS? — they can chill, except for emus fuck them
ARE YOU A CAT OR DOG PERSON? BOTH? — more cat than dog but i want a dog rlly bad
BIGGEST PET PEEVE? — being talked over/ignored lol
FAVOURITE THING ABOUT THE RPC? — that i’ve met and become friends with so many cool people from all over the world ??? like what the fuck ???
TOP TEN FAVE FCS TO USE? — i mean obv at the moment its alisha boe and alex wolff, but also love liana liberato, benedetta gargari, joe keery, really love using all the skam nl fcs, lili reinhart, oliver jackson-cohen, zoe kravitz, and probs a million more i just cant think of
FIVE YOU LIKE WRITING AGAINST? — literally all of them bye lmao
FAVOURITE TYPE OF FOOD? — i luh me some pasta ok
WORST FOOD? — seafood lol i’ve never eaten it and i probs never will
DO YOU PLAY VIDEOGAMES? IF SO, WHAT ONES AND ON WHAT PLATFORM DO YOU PREFER? — i play a lil and wanna play more! atm i have a ps4 and i like to play a lot of like “””decision making games””” (until dawn, detroit become human, etc) but mainly i play graveyard keeper. currently saving to get a pc so i can play more
ANYTHING ELSE YOU’D LIKE TO SHARE WITH THE TAG? — i said something about the barkley marathons before and i would just like to say netflix took it down recently and i haven’t recovered i feel like pure shit i just want her (the barkley marathons) back x
LASTLY, HOW DID YOU FIND US? — i follow a couple of the admins from my ooc blog and saw it was back (after never having time to join any of the other iterations of lockwood) and was like fuck it yk
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Make me play awful games!~
A cool idea to both provide you some laughs and help me pay off my broadband debt! If tumblr bloggers can get paid to eat a crayon then maybe i can sell my pain at playing awful video games?
Request me the worst, just goddamn trashiest games you can even imagine!
The consoles i'm able to record on are pc, ps4, 3ds, ds, gba, ps1, ps2 and any android game that can run on a european phone. (I'm still so mad that Dragalia Lost is america only!!)
And yes i will do ALL kinds of awful games! Low funds means i dont have any objection to Suffering Online, yknow? But i mean even if its torturously bad itd be less awful than it usually would, cos i'd be able to laugh about it with my friends!
Games i will otherwise NEVER play on my channel, but will play for money: horror games (cos im a huge wimp), anything with n/s/f/w content (cos i'm asexual AF lol), really extreme gore or something, really really fuckin awful bigoted depressing trash i.e racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, lo/lic/on, abusive relationships/consent issues/homophobia/all the common bad stuff in dating sims that i'm always vigilant for because this genre has such a weirdly high proportion of trash. ALSO: platformers and shooter games. Not because they morally disgust me but because i have shaky hands and poor spatial awareness while i have my glasses on, so i fail sooooo bad, lol! It could be fun to watch!
Only rule is that you need to give me a vague idea of what kind of bad is gonna be in the game, so i can at least mentally prepare myself. Yknow, not film the SUPER bad ones on a day when i'm already depressed? It doesnt have to be a big explanation cos avoiding spoilers would make my reactions more funny lol. But just like i dunno "it has some abusive relationships somewhere" or whatever.
Also, i think maybe prices depend on the Suffering? Like if you request a game that's just Bad aka glitchy or awfully written, then i might do that for free cos it'd be fun, yknow? But stuff with heavy sex/gore or really dark personally offending content would be a "no i'm sorry i'm not doing that without getting paid".
I dunno how much people usually charge for this sort of thing but i was pretty much thinking "throw me £1 and i will be your dancing monkey, i am just that desperate". And a fiver to make me suffer the worst of the worst, lol! Tho of course thats for free to play games or stuff i can emulate, itd kinda ruin the whole purpose if i was losing my own money in the process. Tho i think after my financial dilemma is over i might keep doing this as a "if you can pay at least half the cost of me buying the game, i will play it for you" thing.
Also everybody who's previously donated to help me with my bills, you get free requests for life! Even the maximum suffering!! After all, i'm only making this post cos i felt so bad that people were kind enough to give me money for nothing. I cant think of anything else i can give you guys that would really earn it, yknow?
Oh and just to add that i do already have one or two ideas i could do for this. There's a legendarily awfully disgusting l/olico/n game i got once in a steam sale due to the goddamn game description NOT SAYING ANYTHING ABOUT HAVING HORRIBLE CHILD NUDITY IN IT! I got fuckin jumpscared by lil girl panties!! And the worst part is that the game actually had really good gameplay?? I was enjoying it for like an hour before The Thing Happened, and my eternal rage will never cease because i hate thinking that a good budget went into this grossness. I wish i could steal all of its ideas and make them wholesome!! Srsly i really like "raising a daughter sim" type games and theyre so rare that i was excited to find one that looked decent and then ABORT ABORT ITS ABOUT RAISING A CHILD SEX SLAVE! So yeah i'd love an excuse to basically rant for three hours about how much this thing traumatized me and how awful the developers are. Also i originally noped out at just the first sign of horrible perviness so you guys can laugh at me dying at the no doubt even worse stuff that is probably there!
Also i'm sure this goes without saying but i'll be covering all the horrible sex stuff with censor bars. I don't wanna get kicked off youtube and i dont want you guys to feel the full awfulness of that game, just to enjoy my reactions to that awfulness. Also DUH i dont want any actual pedos to get off on it and follow my channel thinking they'd see more, that'd completely destroy my will to live...
I probably wont censor out other kinds of bad stuff tho? Maybe gore? Does youtube have a rule against gore? I just wanna play it safe. I wanna give you guys the fun of seeing me Die Inside instead of making you also Die.
#bunni plays games#also if anyone gave me money to punch myself in the face or lick a slug i would also do that#honestly i have no shame#i cant be mad at crayon eater cos ive been that desperate before lol
9 notes
·
View notes
Note
9 14 19 27 39 41 69 70
pls you sent me so many thank u ilu
9. Most regrettable purchase?
it’s a tie between 1. the white knight chronicle games & 2. the tron legacy video game - but for very different reasons. i LOOOVED white knight chronicles and the online play was PERFECT it was like not a full mmo so not #cursed (sorry mmo players but dont boo me for being right) so it was really great to play with my pal @skillethelm but then RIGHT after i got into it they SHUT THE SERVERS DOWN and so like i wasn’t allowed to sort of move on naturally and i always feel really bitter and resentful when i think of it. the tron video game, on the other hand, was just super awful. unplayable. i tried real hard to like it bc i love the movie more dearly than any other movie on god’s green earth but…i couldn’t. im sorry sam flynn
14. Favorite game music?
all of it? there are games i have played JUST BECAUSE the soundtracks were so good i couldn’t stop listening and i got curious - these include chrono trigger, ff6, UT, and mirror’s edge (kinda). like, my favorite of all time will always be zelda music, & my favorite zelda track is oot’s title screen theme, but like…i just fucking love game music man. i love sonic’s buttrock and dragon age’s elven emo pop and zelda’s grand orchestrations and ff13′s/mirror’s edge smooth synth-y stuff and all the catchy tunes of Ye Olde Game Era and dishonored’s goth harpsichord steampunk shit…like i could never really TRULY pick - actually the very first time i ever used a computer it was to visit websites about zelda and listen to the music online - and before that i used to run chrono cross and kingdom hearts on the title screens/opening cinematics for hours just to listen, like before i really knew there was like, online music. man. so much. i love everything
19. Favorite handheld console?
gameboy advance sp, hands down. gameboy advance had the best/most games that i love, could also play regular gameboy games, and the sp had a BACKLIGHT so you could play in the dark. i used to play the original tetris every night to fall asleep on mine. 3DS is a close runner up but you just can’t fit that thing in your pocket the way you can an SP
27. Game that makes you rage?
i fuckin hate super smash bros melee. YEAH I SAID IT LOL like… ok everyone says it’s sooo good and they RUINED smash after that but like, i main pikachu? and they nerfed the FUCK out of pikachu in melee. so i could never win. and it was a horrible teenhood i had growing up playing that shit. brawl was like ten zillion times better. i still lost a lot but i was because i sucked not because the game sucked. melee worshippers can kiss my ass
also, as i was recently reminded, the fight sections of mirror’s edge. fucking bullshit
and a special award to life is strange for having the WORST ending to a NEARLY PERFECT GAME of ALL TIME
39. A sequel that you would die for them to make?
UNDERTA– no sorry. sorry. sorry i’m not gonna say it
ok uhhhhh honestly? my main answer is: any zelda sequel. like all the games take place hundreds or thousands of years apart with different characters and timelines…save for like the oracle games, mm & oot, and then like TECHNICALLY phantom hourglass…i would really just like to see an honest to god sequel in the same continuity. more throwbacks. i lost every bit of my shit when [someone from skyward sword] sorta-kinda made a cameo in botw. it’s everything i want
my other answer is: golden sun 4. we had to wait a literal decade for golden sun 3 and then it ENDS ON A CLIFFHANGER ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? im still lowkey mad abt it. idk if it’ll EVER happen
41. A genre that you just can’t get into?
i’m actually pretty flexible when it comes to genre? i’ve tried & liked: platformers, adventure games, open world, dating sims, stealth, shooters, QTEs, RPGs, racing, music/beat timing, whatever the hell genre animal crossing and harvest moon are…but like the one thing. i cannot do. is real-time strategy. it’s just too boring rip
also, i dislike playing online against other people bc they are usually jerks lol
69. In your opinion, best game ever made?
that’s such a hard one!! it’d be easy to say ocarina of time because it holds such a special place in my heart, but just because it’s special doesn’t mean it’s the most fun or satisfying to play. the best game EVER made would have to have it all - great gameplay, a good amount of story that isn’t too sparse, a catchy and memorable soundtrack, lovable characters, lots and lots of replay value, and excel in online/dlc if that’s a thing, good voice acting/graphics if that’s a thing, no ragequit sections…like i could easily just name the zelda game that comes closest but i wanna be as objective as possible here…
ok i’m gonna go with two categories - 2D games & 3D games - bc they are such different beasts
for 2D im gonna have to say chrono trigger…some places are really frutstratingly hard, but not ragequit hard, and level grinding can be a BIT repetitive but the story, characters, cast, & music are all top notch, and with all the different endings + new game plus you could play it over and over and still have things to do
then for 3D…mmmm see this is hard because like nothing meets ALL of those requirements…portal 2 and okami both have very satisfying stories and wonderfully addicting gameplay that varies up often, but not a lot of replay value…breath of the wild and dragon age inquisition both have amazing story/gameplay balance and near-infinite replay value, but i have a few major nitpicks with both stories, and none of the games i mentioned have online play. i think in the end my nitpicks with zelda’s story and direction are pretty minimal + i have a personal loyalty to the series, so i’d go with breath of the wild.
70. Very first game you ever beat?
you know, i actually can’t remember for sure! i suspect it was either majora’s mask or link’s awakening - funnily enough it was years before i first beat ocarina on my own.
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Talking Point: What Were The Biggest Highs And Lows From E3 2018?
E3 is finally over for another year, bringing to a close the biggest event yet. From surprise promotional crossovers on the Ubisoft conference to a certain game pretty much taking over Nintendo's big summer Direct, there's been plenty of topics to talk about now the dust is beginning to settle. So we've switched on the NL symbol, turned it towards the night's sky and from the darkness, Team Nintendo Life has appeared to discuss our biggest takeaways. As always, we want to hear what you made of Nintendo's presence at the big expo, so be sure to leave a comment below...
Glen Fox, guides editor
Honestly, Im feeling a little deflated after Nintendos E3 showing because I was really hoping for at least one big new announcement for this year. It was pretty telling that most of the Direct focused on Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, because thats all Nintendos really got for year two. Thats great for fans of Smash Bros., but Ive never really had more than a passing interest in it.
So what did that leave? Lets Go Pokmon, which is pretty much designed to plug the gap between now and the core RPG next year. I think it will also serve as a nice stepping stone for all of the new fans that Pokmon GO clawed in. Theres also Super Mario Party, which I personally could not care less about.
But it was nice to see some footage of Fire Emblem: Three Houses, which looks like it could be the best entry in the franchise yet. Also, Fortnite dropped, and thats a MASSIVE boon for the Switch. Been hooked to it ever since. Ultimately, I feel like I was right to look to third-party developers for Switch joy as the year comes to a close. Starlink features Star Fox, Fallout 76 MIGHT come to Switch, and Im still psyched for FIFA 19.
Dom Reseigh-Lincoln, editor
E3 2018 was an odd one for Nintendo. Much like the other big platform holders, there were no earth-shattering announcements or brand new IP that made every stop, look and listen. The announcement of the Star Fox announcement for Starlink: Battle for Atlas was a great move, mainly because it a) satisfies those of us that really want a new adventure of Fox McCloud and the crew and b) gives a title attempting to reignite the cooling embers of the toys-to-life genre a much-needed burst of heat.
But there's no getting away from the fact the huge onus on Super Smash Bros. Ultimate left very little room for other titles to shine. It's Nintendo's big winter release, but the sheer glut of details felt like a poor use of 'prime time' broadcasting space that could have been used to showcase the next big indie hit or a Switch-exclusive title deserving of more attention.
[embedded content]Ryan Craddock, staff writer
For me, this years Nintendo highlights were all the big announcements. The Super Smash Bros. Ultimate reveal despite going into a bit too much detail for me was always going to be the star of the show, and the complete roster, beautiful looking updates to the graphics and lighting, and the addition of Ridley are all fantastic.
Im also excited about Fortnite and really wish it hadnt been leaked beforehand so that the intended shock factor would have been as intense as planned and cant wait to get stuck in this weekend. Ive played it on PS4 before (so that means a new account for me thanks Sony!) and I suck at it. Hopefully Ill improve with practice!
Finally, Starlink: Battle for Atlas has really shocked me. Not just because of the Star Fox inclusion (which is awesome) but because the Treehouse: Live footage looked amazing. As long as the story content is well done, flying around those gorgeous worlds looks like it could be really good fun.
Liam Doolan, Australia correspondent
When the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate director Mashiro Sakurai appeared on my monitor during this weeks Nintendo Direct, I knew the big moment had finally arrived. The details about the new Smash title were ongoing from that point, with 25 minutes of comprehensive coverage.
One major highlight during this particular reveal was the news every character previously featured in the all-star series would be returning in the latest outing. When Young Link from Super Smash Bros. Melee then popped up, for me, it felt like an old friend had returned. I used to main the fast and agile hero of time until he was essentially replaced with the different but similar character, Toon Link.With both of these fighters now back in the series, Im not sure which one Ill gravitate towards. Regardless of who I opt with, Im glad Nintendo is giving its fans this option.
[embedded content]Alex Olney, video producer
To be honest I think one of my favourite announcements was probably Fortnite. Now before any of you start dashing down to the comments to tell me what a sheep I am, it's mainly because now I feel I can finally breathe a bit. So many denied all the evidence, so many claimed it would be bad for it to come to Switch for some reason unbeknownst to anyone, but now it's finally here and there's no going back.
Also it's good fun with friends, and if people are having fun in a healthy way that doesn't negatively impact anyone else, can that really ever be a bad thing? Best thing was Smash though, let's not try and deny that. Oh, and Super Mario Party.
Jon Cousins, Japan correspondent
As with every Nintendo Direct, most of their E3 showing (well, the third party stuff) leaked ahead of time, but aside from the smash segment being really long and inside baseball, I thought it was reasonable. It was great to see Hollow Knight release during the event, and Fortnite was the worst kept secret since Mario + Rabbids, so my highlights are definitely Daemon X Machina and Super Mario Party.
Although Id hardly call myself a mech or anime fan, DXM had a real dynamism and vivid art style, and it's great to see a new IP from some veteran talent. I've never got into the Mario Party series, but I love me a mini-game or two with mates, and with the really interesting ways to use the system, SMP has the potential to be great.
[embedded content]Gonalo Lopes, contributing writer
Nintendos E3 presentation did not just start with a bang it began with several dozens of them accompanied by loud heavy metal music and unbelievable mecha carnage. After recognizing several names among the staff, I am fairly certain that Daemon X Machina is the mech action game of my dreams, one already hinted by Xenoblade Chronicles X back in 2015. A very special birthday ahead for yours truly when n the 16th of October Starlink: Battle for Atlas lands with exclusive Star Fox ship, pilot and mission content. The perfect crossover and a continuation of Nintendo and Ubisofts discrete relationship of mutual respect.
There was nothing even slightly F-Zero related, I still dont know who is making Metroid Prime 4 and Bayonetta 3 remains illusive as ever but the sadness of those omissions is tiny when stacked up to the amount of joy from the amazing new games (and new content for old ones) heading our way in the next six months. The Switch is quickly becoming the most important games console I ever owned in my life and I look to the future with a big childish smile slapped across my face. Mission accomplished, Mr. Iwata. I thank you Directly! for so, so much.
Richard Atkinson, contributing writer
The unruly and unpredictable E3 storm has passed which means its time to shrug off the inevitable disappointment from getting WAY too hyped, focus on the slices of goodness that we got from Nintendo this year and turn our attention to what brought a smile to our faces. For me, the instant release of the Splatoon 2: Octo Expansion was one of the most welcome surprises - the thought of having to wait even longer was too much to bear and my prayers were answered.
But there was one title that got me even more excited than a Nintendo fan learning of normal voice chat without the use of a silly app and that was Super Mario Party. The patent that Nintendo filed a few months back finally saw its commercial light and, boy, did it look great. The idea of tapping two Switch screens together to make a bigger playing field on a table in a pub, friends house or train coach excites me and I cant wait to see what the title has to offer. Time for many friendships to be ruined all over again.
[embedded content]Alan Lopez, contributing writer
Youll hear what I think about Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, but now is nowhere near its release date of 7th December. Heck, its not even June 22nd, henceforward 'Mario Aces Day'. So instead of sitting on my hands, I joined with 100 million people before me and downloaded Fallout Shelter, the free-to-play sensation thats one more toe from hit-maker Bethesdas toe-in-the-water approach on Nintendo platforms.
And admittedly, somewhat surprisingly, I didnt know much about it beyond screenshots. After deciding this would be my first post-E3 experience, I booted it up, learned the ropes, and started colonising my little ant farm of people. Like an upside down Sim Tower, I nurtured my little citizens into good health and great fortune. Hours went by. I basked in the dull hum of fallout.
Sure, maybe its two years late, but E3 has a way of making everything exciting. My face was close to my Switch screen all weekend playing games and checking the e-shop, like a child pressed against a cooking microwave. Im thinking, Am I gonna get radiation from this? But I just want a front row seat to all the changes
Dave Frear, retro reviewer
Many games from 2018s E3 caught my interest, but one unexpected surprise was Starlink: Battle for Atlas. Reference the discussions in relation to r43ds-pt.eu ,A crucial Nintendo3DS research team.I was unimpressed when it was shown off last time, but as the segment unfolded at this years Ubisoft conference I began to warm to it - and then we were hit with a burst of Cornerian radio chatter and learned Fox McCloud would be popping up in the Switch version. That raised my interest levels further and whilst it could turn out to be rubbish, it looks quite fun from what weve seen so far.
Less likely to be rubbish is Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. He kept us waiting, but Snake has made his return as have all previous fighters, plus playing as Ridley is going to be a thing. Awesome. Nintendo may have dedicated too much time to it in their presentation, but I can see it being hard to put down come December.
[embedded content]Morgan Sleeper, E3 2018 reporter
Thinking back on my time on the show floor over this years E3, one thing stands out: getting to go hands-on with the Pok Ball Plus. I also had a great time playing Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, but it will be a long time before anything else in gaming knocks me out as much as catching and then hearing Pokmon in the palm of my hand.
Still as much as I enjoyed Nintendos line-up, the real highlight was getting to check out so many exciting third-party games. I loved banging on the Joy Con and belting out beats in the full-bodied, freeform musical adventure of Gal Metal; I loved exploring the charming world of Little Dragons. If you ever still have additional information and facts about the most up-to-date jailbreak technology concerning Nintendo Console; try this.Caf, foraging for ingredients and cooking up meals; I loved the stunningly stylish rhythm action of Musynx; I loved beating the stuffing (and cupcakes, and glitter) out of opponents in the pastel party fighter SNK Heroines; and I loved the Etrian Odyssey-meets-Disgaea dungeon crawling of Labyrinth of Refrain: Coven of Dusk.
These were all especially exciting for me because they prove that even among the first-party frontrunners, high-profile ports, and indie hits, the Switch has plenty of room left for what quickly became my favourite section of the 3DS library: colourful, quirky imports. Long may that continue!
How did Nintendo fare at E3 2018? (323 votes)A huge success!11%
An epic fail25%
Somewhere in between65%
Please login to vote in this poll.
So those are our thoughts, but what did YOU think of E3 2018? Drop a vote in our poll, and a comment below and let's get the conversation going...
0 notes
Last Seen Blogs
