i’ll slither from eden back home to her a mr. & mrs. malcolm neil foxworth story

rating: E word count: 5,184

after burying mrs. steiner, malcolm foxworth leans forward and presses a dry kiss to olivia's mouth.

an au ending for that night.

read on ao3!

im sorry guys but the alenoah gay dads au brainrot won........... (this is the prologue btw)

(im not gnna publish this right away bcs i wanna make it so that theres images in the fic :3 not sure if im gnna stick to that whole thing after 3 chapters or so)

people on twitter be normal about acht's gender (impossible)

lorelais weird beef with jess in s2 is like. u are a grown woman. moreover the weird bit where she kinda sorta prioritizes her daughter's whiny bf over her actual daughter is. u are a grown woman and that is a teenage manchild.

hiatus notice!

It's been a long time!! We are both well, but life has been collectively kicking both our asses a little bit, and the prospect of picking up and running the blog as consistently as we used to is feeling kind of daunting as a result. So we're going to step back for a little while and work on some other stuff while we clear our heads, and come back later ready to continue.

(how much later? unsure! But hopefully not long, we still both care a lot about the blog and its story. This isn't the last you'll see of it by a long shot :))

Additionally, both mods have both moved main blogs over the past few months- you can now find us instead at @alien-shmalien and @creaturelytracker.

Take care!!

NSFW (so feel free to delete without answering)

It's really easy to notice the weird characterization in fandom when I read smut fics. Because fandom has this homophobic view that sex position preference has anything to do with personality and looks. The bottom is usually portrayed as delicate, feminine, weak, and an unstable mess that sobs if anyone looks at them sideways (hello misogyny!) And the top is usually portrayed as commanding, tough, physically strong, robust (which is why Eddie are usually given magical muscles that appears with no exercise or physical labour).

And it's so silly! You can be the burliest, most mean looking bear of a man, and enjoy bottoming, or a shy little twink and absolutely loathe it. Looks and personality has nothing to do with it, and I don't get why fandom seems to think it does.

And it's not a Steddie exclusive problem either, I remember someone having an absolute meltdown in the Stonathan tag, because people dared to write Jonathan as a top. When according to them he clearly was a delicate flower, a sweet and caring guy, so he had to bottom, and it was wrong to write otherwise. And Steve, as a "mean jock", had to top😂

I'll admit I pretty exclusively read Steve as a bottom, because for me to enjoy reading about someone's butt, I need to find them hot🤷‍♀️ But the weird characterization in most of  these fics is really testing my patience. (I don't write smut myself, and I usually wouldn't complain about something I don't personally do anything to change, but this is not one author's preference, it's a huge chunk of the fandom, which makes it more fair to complain about, I feel)

I just want to read a confident Steve, who is still physically fit and a bit of a bitch, who is the same height as his partner (or taller in the case of Stonathan), and who just happens to enjoy bottoming. No personality changes needed😭 How can that be such a rare find?

i have done nothing tonight except go absolutely feral over a dynamic, and sae is fully to blame for this

perhaps some more productivity tomorrow-

Hey, Dr Fizz...could you give me some tips on how to cope with food poisoning?

Much appreciated.

Anon

Get some rest and let your stomach settle for a bit. And/or drink something.

You should just be more careful when eating, 'kay? Don't eat too much or eat too fast.

someone needs to break it to lou that it's not, in fact, romantic to tell someone the way you'd open them up and clean them inside out and bury them and love them forever.

tbh the way some of yall talk about tomgreg makes it seem like yall don't have any clue what gay male attraction is

Ok hear me out...

hey hi uh would you be able to check if y'all have The Land Before Time IV back in stock yet?

Sure thing- one moment.

*Kim turns to the monitor and pulls the keyboard a little closer to herself before she starts typing away. After a minute, she slides it back to it's original spot and turns back to the customer.*

It looks like we do, yeah. It should be in our Kids and Family section- let me know if you need help finding it.

🦁 my favorite ships

🎹 the worst roleplay trend i ever saw

🦁 my favorite ships

this is sooo hard to answer for me– i've always been a chemistry-over-fandom-ships kind of person, so I've had some weird ships over the course of time i've done rp.

my favourite overall was when i was in the pokemon rpc (on twitter lol), and i had a trainer black/wally ship that i adored. they were silly and goofy and i had a blast. hope that rp partner is doing ok, we haven't talked in a whole.

for lumi, though? i currently have a planned thoma/lumi ship that i've rly loved concepting for (ily @//scarletooyori), and i'd theoretically like to plot with a childe at some point! .

🎹 the worst roleplay trend i ever saw

i had a different answer for this originally but while sifting through the memories i remember that i was in the thick of the onceler rp fandom (or at least on the sidelines: i wasn't involved directly but i saw A Lot and interacted with some onceler blogs myself) and i was in the gd depths of a community that was just a billion aus of the same character. while i don't knock the concept of au-character-rps (esp whole blogs surrounding that), it was a Weird Fucking Experience for a very young leo.

i dunno if it's exactly a 'trend' but i haven't seen that kind of massive wave of a community built entirely of The Same Character since then.

[ RP EXPERIENCE ASKS ] !

grungle.

it is time to add my dearly beloved.

very excited to add in WEATHE.R REPOR.T from STON.E OCEA.N onto this blog !! <3 i have sooooo many thoughts i'd love to share about him and throw him at all of you

Okay actually. The fact that in Inquistion, the whole game they treat Anders like shit at the drop of a hat. The most positive thing even a Hawke set to Condoned/Loves/Alive can say is ‘he’s complicated. Not a hero or a monster, or maybe both hero and a monster.’ EVERY time he’s brought up, it’s; “Oh, he’s evil. He ruined things. He went too far. He protested peacefully for 7+ years after a lifetime of experiencing oppression and minority violence, but then he pulled the switch on a trolley problem and blew up a building with 40 people in it and caused insane fighting in Kirkwall to instigate war before the Right of Annulment was in effect, while there were enough Mages to have a chance, and succeeded and started a revolt across southern Thedas that gives Mages their first shot at freedom in 600+ years. (An act which he immediately submitted himself to judgement and death if asked for, with no resistance, because he took the innocents among his casualties seriously even when it was obviously for the greater good). But it’s evil, because he combatted oppression with force.”

But then you get a character with the most Mr. Intellectual Dudebro ‘other people aren’t human to me because they’re not enough like me’ take most of the game apparently, whose society is suddenly retconned to be a European slaver intellectual opulent society, deciding he’s going to nuke the whole planet and his people’s current way of life (based on indigenous cultures) and commit genocide against every other race so his best most perfect race can go back to how it was in High Society times, which after ONE YEAR of being awake he can somehow tell??? Is worth it??? And no other society is good enough? ONE. YEAR. No alternatives it’s supremacy genocide or nothing. But he’s sad about the fact he’s doing it so clearly it’s sympathetic and in fact the whole bullshit is framed as so sympathetic you can choose to spend the ENTIRE NEXT GAME trying to bring him back to the light???

Like they really said “a minority enacting hard violence against oppressors and causing some collateral damage as a last resort to combat endless institutional oppression after years of peaceful protesting is unforgivable and vile, but some guy who thinks he knows more than anyone else on the planet after seeing vague aspects of a few other cultures for 1-3 years deciding to obliterate every other race in existence for his own race to achieve its Opulent Ruling Race Supremacy status again immediately is a sympathetic pull just going too far” I am going to EAT someone