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moonfireshadow · 4 months

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Rewatched Saltburn and I'm obsessed with Farleigh and Oliver's tutoring scene. The essay specifically. For those who don't remember: Oliver did his homework and all his assignments and genuinely gave a well thought out essay for their summer assignments. Farleigh shows up hungover and late and didn't even read the books. But the teacher immediately loves Farleigh and is chatting him up with an interest he barely tried to show Oliver. Even after Oliver gives his presentation and shows that he's clearly a much better student than Farleigh. Obviously this is the real start of their rivalry. But it's also such a beautiful look into their characters and how they mirror eachother. Farleigh understands Oliver's essay, I believe. But like the teacher he's bored by it. The knowledge and work is there, but the presentation of it is boring and strange. Academic and correct, but lacking the appeal to the audience. (Which, can we talk about the fact Farleigh was genuinely listening at all? The teacher zoned out and switched channels, but Farleigh was interested and paying enough attention to know the exact number of times Oliver used the word "thus" in his essay. They respect each other truly even if they despise eachother at this point, and refuse to acknowledge the grudging respect.) So Farleigh does what he does best, he gloats over Oliver. He picks apart the style of the essay and it's presentation rather than addressing the central argument or topic. This delights the teacher and frustrates Oliver who is like, "so you're going to critique the style of my essay rather than it's substance? Seems a bit lazy" and that's the core component of these two characters.

Farleigh is ALL about presentation. He knows how fragile his pedistal is placed up and in view for everyone to see. He's a charity project, just like every other rando of the month. Sure he has some familiar connection, and that's given him a leg up in this world. But it's still shakey at best. He always has to give the correct performance, say the right words, keep his audience on HIS side. Unless he wants to get knocked down with the rest of the common rabal that he knows he's belongs with, but can't stand the idea of. So yes, of course he picks apart the one thing he knows Oliver is failing at. He takes his one advantage over Oliver and uses it mercilessly to both entertain and secure his audience on his side. (I wonder if the positions had been different some how, if Farleigh would have had anything to say about the substance of the essay itself. He was paying attention to it, did he want to have a real academic conversation? Did he possibly want to try and connect to Oliver in that way? A real and non performative way with someone who's so similar to him?)

As for Oliver, obviously his character is intelligent. He does the readings. He does the research. He puts the time and effort in to *learn* in the way Farleigh never does. And it must infuriate him that his essay is so easily pushed to the side for a cheep critique that doesn't even address the central argument of his essay. Of course he would hate Farleigh from the start for that. It's such a quick negation of all that Oliver has to offer and give just because it's not wrapped up in a pretty bow. And that's just his character. The substance is there, the intelligence is there. But it's not enough. It will never be enough. Because Oliver doesn't know how to translate it to his audience in a way they'll care about. He learns and tries to mimic, but it always falls short because he just can't seem to figure out the way to blend in and present himself so seamlessly as Farleigh.

And that's why they're such perfect mirrors of each other. They're both intelligent and clever. But they've found different ways of getting what they want and proving themselves. Farleigh is the face and the presentation, Oliver is the substance and body. In another world imagine what these two could have done and been if they hadn't been pitted against each other for the same prize. And the fact Oliver definitely deliberately shoved Farleigh out at the perfect time so he wouldn't get hurt and killed? Oliver and Farleigh respect and admire the other. But their tragedy is they can never be on the same page or team because the world they're in says there is only room for one. And they'd both do anything to get that title.

#saltburn #farleigh start #oliver quick #saltburn spoilers #character analysis #i just really feel gay for these two #its about the narrative foils #im obsessed

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suguruplsr · 7 months

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All you know..

✰ ✰ ✰ “are we dating? are we fuckin’? are we best friends? are we something in between that?” — heartbeat , childish gambino

જ⁀➴ i fucking love this. idk what it is tho <3

,, fuckboy! suguru x fem!reader , situation-ship , toxic (both kinda) , reader is mentioned to hook up a bit (w/ boys n’ girls) , slight angst , smut , sex at a party , mirror sex , mean! suguru , degradation , choking , slapping , brat taming ? , idk i wrote this at 4 am

fuckboy! suguru who you met at some party your friend took you to, hosted by his best friend, gojo satoru. surprisingly enough, suguru was the exact opposite of satoru, sure he had the sexual appeal that he definitely used to his advantage, but he was more respectful and quiet. rather than hitting up on girls like his counterpart, the girls were lured to him with just looks alone. his dark eyes and low voice wrapping them tightly into his web until he’s asking them to get out of his bed at 6 am in the morning, needing to clean his room and air out the stench of sex.

— but he never told you to leave, in fact, he let you stay in bed while he cleaned, gathering up your clothes to wash them and leaving out some of his for you to put on when you woke up. suguru wondered if he was just pussy whipped or just too tired to deal with a person that early in the morning. but he was in fact whipped when he found you fixing up his bed after waking up. actually making small talk with him, something he wasn’t fond of, but after your conversation drifted off from the topic last night, he found himself talking with you for hours on his couch, eventually watching a movie and all.

fuckboy! suguru who you see more, from random calls of ‘needing him’ to late night drives to get ice cream. or smoking a thick blunt at 8 am while you two watch some rom-com you picked out. getting picked up straight after work to go to his house and get your feet rubbed, loved on with small praises murmured into your thighs. sometimes he’s taking you to the club or to fancy dinners. you like it, the diversity of being.. well, something, with him. which leads to what you don’t like, not having a name for what you two are.

— two months. it took you two months of good dick, soft moments, fun dates, and getting spoiled for you to question everything. you almost felt guilty, but you were too headstrong for that, you know any other girl in your place would never complain or demand an answer as to what relationship you two have formed. but you know that’s probably why he likes you, so stubborn and always knowing what you want. the first time it came to mind, you asked him straight up.

━━━━⊱⋆⊰━━━━

“suguru?” you finish cutting your steak, before answering his small “hm?” , “what are we?” your voice was probably softer then you wanted it to be, confidence faltering as he stayed silent. perhaps this wasn't the best time? well yea, no shit, you think. you two were at some well known restaurant downtown, both of you dressed up and eating delicious food that suguru was paying for. you didn’t know where his money came from, but you knew better than to press when he gave an indirect answer the first time you asked, guys like that usually do some shady shit. and you have enough experience to know to just accept you found a man with good money and go about your business.

“how about you just eat mama? we’ll talk later.” and later never came, just subject changes and avoidance that had you rethinking this whole thing you had with him. it’s not like he has eyes for other girls, obviously committed to this growing.. situationship.. you two have going on. he turns down girls in a heartbeat, and nearly yelled at satoru when he found out his best friend was giving out his number to shy admirers. he was very clear that he wanted you. just not clear enough. and it’s not like you’re looking for others, but you can’t help but just want something more, wanting to be in an actual relationship rather than walk on this thread of string that you could tip over at any moment.

━━━━⊱⋆⊰━━━━

fuckboy! suguru that you have an argument with for the first time after 3 months of knowing each other. annoyed by your nonstop questioning that he’s been desperately trying to not answer. and he goes off, making it painfully clear that no matter what you two do, you guys aren’t even completely serious, meaning that those moments of vulnerability, kisses that were way more than just the ‘heat of the moment’, the drives to walmart at 2 am for snacks, everything that made you fall in love, was just nothing. and that he doesn’t owe you an explanation as to why it’s nothing, as to why those soft touches that explored your body in a language different from just sex, was nothing. the tiny shifts in your dynamic together was just nothing. there was never something, and you were just friends with benefits. nothing more.

— finding your answer, you decide that perhaps it was best to leave nothing and to find something. not talking to him for weeks and responding to those guys who ask for your number, which leads to very few that you see outside of your bed. maybe you were desensitized after him? only knowing the name of geto suguru, a taste on your lips that was oh so sour. yet a taste on your lips that never leaves, no one fills the lost warmth when they hold you, it’s not the same as his, they may be a good kisser, but it’s not the same as his, they could throw dick down good, but it wasn’t the same as his. you only knew geto suguru.

— and you fucking hate yourself for that. you hate that he suddenly appears outside your door after 5 weeks and 4 days since your argument. you hate that you let him in and fuck you in such an intimate way that it doesn’t feel like fucking, you hate that you swear up and down you’ll set it straight with him in the morning only to be greeted by his lazy smile, making you breakfast and apologizing for everything except for not giving you a simple answer. you hate that you let him walk back into your life so casually. and it happens, you ask after two weeks of ‘normalcy’, in which he doesn’t answer. and you try to make it clear you won’t be seeing him again. but it happens again, again, and again. because no one can love you in the way geto suguru does. and you only knew geto suguru.

fuckboy! suguru who makes you fall into a swirl of emotions you hate. 6 months. you don’t ask anymore. that cute guy at starbucks? you had three dates with him. the hot tattoo artist down the street? yea you two fucked after she finished her work on your back. the same one suguru kissed all over after it finished healing. gojo satoru? he’s been in your bed a few times. that makes you confident in knowing that suguru isn’t oblivious to the fact that you’ve been seeing others without a care in the world. but you also know he won’t do anything, because according to his logic, you two weren’t anything serious. so he has no right to judge you, no matter how well he treats you. it was nothing in his eyes right?

— maybe that’s why you have to try breaking his patience again, one last time. maybe he’ll finally cut you off and let you move on or he’ll give you an answer you can take and hold onto, without hesitation. you’re going to a halloween costume themed party, everyone in their typical final girl outfits, or wearing iconic outfits of killers you’ve all grown to know. you wear a skimpy killer nurse costume, painting fake blood in places that forces eyes to linger for too long. i mean, if it made geto suguru, of all people, to stop and give you a look that may have been a warning for you to keep your act together, then was it really a defective plan?

━━━━⊱⋆⊰━━━━

“man, this mansion is fucking creepy.” your friend groans, taking in another sip of her ‘blood’ (wine), after you two walk over the creaking wood. you two were on the 2nd floor, watching the dancing that happened below you two. mainly coming up here after you two realized this is where mostly everyone looking for a quick fuck went to. but your friend only gave you a sigh when your eyes stayed on some broad guy at the end of the hall. “you serious about this? what about that guy you came here with?” she raised an eyebrow, nudging your side as you rolled your eyes.

“and he’s precisely why i’m doing this babe.” you grin, finishing off your drink and getting up once you see the familiar cloak of suguru’s classic ghost face costume from the corner of your eyes. he was finally taking the bait and coming up stairs. you only knew it was him from the gray glowing paint at the ends of it, something he did when he found out a lot of people were going to dress up as the famous killer. but you also knew from how his eyes stayed on you, they may be covered by the creepy mask, but the slow turn of his head from downstairs when he had first seen you walking up the stairs said enough.

you strut over to the guy with a ditzy smile, his eyes quickly finding themselves falling to your busty breasts as you rub a hand along his chest, making it ‘apparent’ to him that you wanted to take him to some random room and have him fuck your brains out. which wasn’t really the case to be honest. sure he had a good figure, but from his constant stuttering and nervous body language, you knew wasn’t your type. he was lost, definitely a virgin. maybe you’ll hit him up when he gets some experience under his belt? well, probably after you delete the one number that always stays pinned in your messages.

you almost have the poor guy falling for your slutty act when a gloved hand grips your wrist tightly, the masked figure pulling you away with no words. “suguru? fuck are you doing? hey—“ you tried playing dumb, almost tripping when he slams the door of some guest room and pins you to it harshly. you stay silent, almost holding your breath at the sounds of his heavy one, the white mocking mask staring at you eerily. “i tried to be patient with you.” suguru’s voice was filled with bitterness that made you scared for a moment, his hands moving your body. “i even tried to fucking ignore whatever stupid shit you got going on, since you wanna fuck everything that exists.” he sneers, gripping your throat and ignoring your whimper of his name, acrylic nails scratching his gloved hand, which he swats away. “i even let you get away with having my best friends dick down your throat.” he chuckles darkly, pulling you off the wall and pushing you to the bed, his hands letting go.

“wait— suguru i—“ you nearly choke on your words, your eyes watery as he keeps walking towards you, boots dangerously clacking against the wood floor as you fall to the bed, cornered. he pulls the mask up to his nose, strands of his bang showing and you can hear his words clearly, panties pooling in fear, “i want your ass naked and face in the fuckin’ sheets when i come back.” is all he says, you scramble after he closes the door, rolling off the two piece outfit and feeling humiliated at the sight of your cum stained panties.

but nothing is more embarrassing than the possibility of someone walking in, considering his orders weren’t for you to lock the door, or to even look in that direction. you were forced to wait, face deep in the blanket, scared of hearing that door opening and not hearing the dark tone of suguru’s voice. sure it had you aching in dread, but you’ll take whatever sick punishment suguru has for you than someone seeing you in such a state. did you really take it too far this time? but it’s not really your fault.. he’s the one pent up on you seeing other people when you two aren’t even dating.

fortunately, you’re smart enough to know not to even say any of that when you hear the door open, quickly slammed closed and locked. your hands grip the blanket tighter at the sound of his boots. those fucking boots, why do they have to be so loud? it feels like you’re about to be killed or somethin’..

and killed you were. your pussy at least..

“fuck are you cryin’ for huh? this what you do on the daily, nothin’ new right?” suguru chuckles with a hand wrapping around your neck, and pulling your teary ruined face back towards him. he was taking you from behind, cock filling you to the hilt and making you feel him even more as you leaned back to him. you weren’t sure how many times you came on him. time doesn’t even feel real anymore.. what were you even doing before this? it didn’t matter.

you try to talk, words mushing into gibberish as he tightens his grip, making a sound of disappointment before pushing your face back into the sheets, slapping your ass and fucking into your sloppy pussy with thrusts that had you thinking of nothing. only able to just take it, moaning loudly with dark spots forming in your vision, the music downstairs hopefully drowning you two out. suguru’s mask was long gone, most of his hair pulled into a ponytail with his bangs falling. he looked so hot when you two were getting ready, and he still does, your face twisted to the mirror across the room, your blurry eyes watching him put you in your place.

“you’re droolin’ princess, gonna leave a stain for satoru to see later.” suguru smiles, you weren’t even shy about how the thought turned you on, clenching around him so tightly it was almost hard for him to drag his cock through your walls. “oh you like thaaat. let him know this pussy’s mine kay? bet you want him to see you like this.. always slutting yourself out with everyone, only to keep comin’ back to me.” you knew that was an underline for something you never forget. no one’s as good as him. no one will ever fuck you as good as him. and no one will love you as good as him. no one gets to keep playing with your heart like he does, taking you home at 5 am and staying in your life like it was nothing. no one tastes like geto suguru.

that’s all you knew.

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turtlecleric · 2 months

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I Know Now

late as usual ~ nsfw, rise!donnie x reader (cw: altered state of mind)

---

“Dearest?”

“Yes, Donnie.”

"Tell me again."

You blow out a slow breath, closing your eyes and pushing down the hint of exasperation that's starting to bloom in your chest. He's worried, you remind yourself. Unsure. Hesitant in a way that you simply aren't. You can be patient, for him.

"It will be disorienting and confusing," you say once more. "I may feel overwhelmed or scared. I may not be able to control my thoughts or actions. I may hate it."

Donnie searches your face, brows furrowed. "And you still want t-"

"Yes."

The movement of his free hand tapping rapidly against his thigh catches your eye. It makes you soften further, seeing how worried he is about this. About you. You step forward to wrap your arms around him, and his own slide around you immediately, making the bottle of pills in his hand rattle as he does. His cheek rests on the top of your head, and you bask in the comfort of his hold for a long moment before leaning back to catch his gaze. Somber, anxious eyes look back at you.

"I trust you,” you murmur. “I understand the risks. And I still really want to do this. Okay?"

His mouth opens, but he closes it without saying anything. When he opens it again, it's with a firmer, more resolute expression.

"Okay," he says, nodding and pulling away fully from your hug. "Let's get you set up then."

He leads you to the bed nestled in the back corner of the workshop - one that he put together specifically for this. Sturdy, with a mattress that has just the right amount of give, an absurd number of pillows, and the softest blankets and sheets you've ever had the pleasure of running your hands over. The memory of when he'd first shown you the finished product makes you smile.

It's perfect, Donnie!

Of course it is! I made it to your exact preferences based on the data I've collected over the past few weeks, and - oh, let me show you how the heating function works!

God. You love him so fucking much.

Settled amongst the pillows now, with him kneeling on the bed beside you, your heart sings thinking about how much work he's put into this. The pills, obviously. The bed. The lectures and pamphlets and reminders that you don't have to do this - despite the fact that you were the one who requested it in the first place. Wanting to experience a taste of what it's like for him, so you can understand better but… also because you're a little selfish. He's told you countless times how much better his season is now that he has you. Alone, it had been miserable. With you… it's something incredible. And he always seems so content during his season - relaxed and satisfied and so goddamn happy. Giddy with it, even. You want to see what that feels like.

"The effects should last approximately one hour," Donnie says, pulling you from your thoughts. The bottle rattles again when he gingerly shakes a single pill into his hand. "Don't forget that your heart rate will increase, and you'll start to feel really warm. That's normal. Oh, and don’t forget that-”

"Donnie," you call softly, cutting him off. You take the pill from him with one hand and use the other to weave your fingers around his and squeeze. "As long as I'm with you, I'll be fine."

His eyes soften, and the tiny smile on his face bolsters you. Before he has a chance to make you repeat the warnings (again), you reach over to one of the cup holders jutting out from the side of the bed and pick up a water bottle.

(It's important to stay hydrated, dearest. Ooh! Watch this, there's a hidden cupboard for snacks that raises up when you press-)

The pill goes down easily, and Donnie immediately starts to ramble again. Reminding you of what to expect, of the contingency plans in place should you decide this really isn't for you and you need to stop. You half-listen, smirking when he falters for just a moment as you start to strip.

You'd thought you might get a bit chilly since he keeps it relatively cold in here, but you're feeling okay even without your clothes. You get comfortable on the bed, lying down and… about to ask how long it will take for… hm.

Hm.

He's still talking, but you're a little distracted by the way his throat moves as he speaks. The way his tendons stretch and pull when he shifts, when he turns his head, or... the glimpses of his tongue, his teeth, as he talks.

Wait. Focus.

"-feeling?"

You blink up at him. "...Huh?"

He looks like he can't decide between worry or amusement. It's not an unusual expression to see on his face - you evoke that in him pretty often - but something about it mesmerizes you.

"How are you feeling?" He says again.

Feeling. How are you. Feeling.

It's hard to focus when you're staring at him. Looking away feels impossible, but you manage to close your eyes and think.

You feel... warm. That's right. He said that would happen. You feel… hazy. Like your thoughts have to drag themselves through molasses to make it to the surface. Hungry? No, hungry isn't quite right, but it's... similar. Like a craving. You want. You want. You feel your pulse in your throat, hear the blood rushing in your ears. You miss him. He’s right here, but you miss him.

When you open your eyes and see him there, you feel yourself relax. His gaze is intense. Heavy. It makes you shiver, goosebumps rising along your arms and legs, and you try to focus. Focus. Try to…

Why aren’t you touching him? It seems stupid to not be touching him. More than stupid, it feels wrong. You reach out, resting a hand against his plastron, feeling the vibrations there as he speaks.

Wait, what is he saying? You see the movement of his mouth, and you hear the words, but… the meanings slip away like smoke in your hands. Your name is the only thing you recognize, and oh, the way he says your name has you shivering again. Shivering - but you're so warm. The thought makes you smile, but it falls when you suddenly become aware of every inch that separates you from him. You place your other hand on his arm, curling around his bicep, pulling him closer, because he’s so far away. Even when he moves where you pull him, letting you wrap around him and press your face into the crook of his neck, he’s still too far away.

He says your name again. Quiet and gentle, and you love the sound of it. It echoes in your mind, a layered whisper that soothes something you can’t put a name to. You breathe him in, nuzzling into his neck as the both of you lie down together. Arms around each other, your legs entwined, he’s right here but you need him closer. You need… something. You need…

Hands massage your back. Your shoulders. Someone is moaning and you think it might be you. You want to say something, but you can’t, can’t, can’t - there’s an ache in your chest, a burning in your stomach. Your thighs are sticky. You need- you can feel your cunt throbbing.

A brief moment of clarity. Suddenly you can understand his steady murmuring, can fully remember what's happening and how you got here.

“-okay, I’m here. I’ll take care of you, okay? You’re safe, I’ve got you.”

You need him. You need him, you need him right now, and you have to tell him. You don’t even care, don’t have the capacity to even be embarrassed by how whiny your voice is when you finally manage to speak. “Donnie. Donnie, please. Please, I need you. Please fuck me, please, Donnie, please, I need-”

The moment he kisses you, all of your thoughts slip away. There is only him and you and him and you and him but then he pulls away, and it hurts. You miss him. You try to tell him, ask him to come back, but someone is whimpering, and you miss him, and it hurts, and you can’t think.

You miss him.

His hands find you again, his lips pressing against your own, and the relief is overwhelming. Your entire body shudders, shaking apart beneath him. You can't differentiate between the touches, his hands and mouth here and there and everywhere, everywhere, everywhere at once. Someone whines again.

Donnie lies on top of you then, arms pressed between you and the mattress, holding you close against him, and oh. The weight of him, the smell of him, the taste of him - it’s enough to make you go boneless. Something, something - his knee, you think - slides between your legs, pressing against you. You can't help but grind against it as his tongue just barely glides against yours. It’s so warm. Everywhere, everything, warm and good and safe.

You’re trembling, chills running up your spine, lighting sparking along your skin. You’re flying, you think. Weightless, somehow, with only friction and pressure and Donnie Donnie Donnie. He adjusts, his knee moving away, but before you can protest something slips inside of you. His finger, you realize after a few pumps, and it's better, so much better, but it's not enough and you need more more more-

Donnie is whispering something that you don’t understand, but his voice alone is like a balm. Soothing your impatience. Your desperation. You focus on the rumble of it, then on the rub of his jaw against yours, then on the slick circles of his thumb against your clit, then his fingers - two, now - pumping easily in and out of you. Your hips are in constant motion, your arms clawing at his arms, and you can't stop seeking him in every way that you can. Time warps - there is no time, only feeling as you fight to somehow have him closer.

He lifts himself up, and you miss having his weight press you into the mattress, but then you feel him start to press something bigger inside of you, and fuck yes this is it. His cock - this is what you were craving, what you need more than oxygen itself, and it feels so fucking good. The feeling of him inside you, filling you up, full, so full of him. And then he starts to move and - no, this is what you need. This delicious, wet friction, the feeling of him spearing you open again and again as you pull apart at the seams. There is only him and here and now, and it’s all you've ever wanted and it's yours.

Are you coming? You can't tell if you are or if it just feels that good to have him pumping into you. You can't seem to think past each thrust, your mind going blank after every... Fuck, are you coming? Or does it just feel that good-

One of his words slips through the mist that's replaced your mind. Mine. It makes your skin spark. You've never felt more safe, more content, more full. It's almost too much. Just the brush of his scales against your skin is enough to overwhelm you, and fuck, fuck, are you coming or does he just feel that good inside of you?

You want to tell him… something. Something. You don't know, couldn't put it into words even if you could manage to control your mouth enough to speak. You might already be speaking. You’re not sure. His voice, though, you are sure about. It's a constant echo in your mind, and you can’t understand the words but at the same time you do. You understand. Safe, pretty, good, mate, mine. Yes, yes, yes. You’re his. Forever.

Your heart is beating so fast. Your entire body is one big heartbeat, pulsing with every movement he makes. It’s almost scary - would be scary if you didn’t feel so fucking good and so completely, utterly safe. You're an imploding star, a burning, writhing, blissed-out thing that used to be a person and that may not ever be one again. You think you might be okay with that.

God, are you coming or does it-

That thought is abruptly disintegrated when you do come. Your eyes roll back into your head, waves and waves of shimmering pleasure lighting up every nerve. On and on and on, it doesn’t stop. It doesn’t stop, and you’re sure now. This is you coming, and it isn’t fucking stopping. Someone is crying, and this shouldn’t actually be possible. It shouldn't be possible for a person to feel this way, and it isn’t fucking stopping, holy fuck. The wave swells in a way it never has before, cresting and cresting and cresting, and- oh. You’re crying. That's you.

breathe, darling. got you, beautiful, mine, doing so good. breathe. that’s it, pretty girl

He’s comforting you, you think. What is there to comfort? There has never been anything that feels as good as this. You’re still coming and he’s still fucking you through it, and thank god, because if he stopped you might actually die. You reach for him, but he's already there.

mine, mine, mine

You think you might be starting to come down from that insane high. The trembling seems permanent, but you can think a little, can take in more of what he's saying now even though it's a little slurred in your ears.

“- got you. All mine, so pretty and perfect. Smell so fucking good, taking my cock like you were made for me, like the perfect mate. So good, pretty girl, you're doing so good. I love you so-”

He's happy with you. You're being good. You're good. You're good and safe and warm, and he's here, and this is where he belongs, always. Deep inside of you, fucking you, always, always, with his fingers in your mouth and his teeth in your shoulder. You can't separate pain from pleasure. It's all one swirling, overwhelming cacophony of sensation until you feel him release inside of you, coating your insides with his come, marking you as his in every way - and it does something to your brain. You think you really are talking now, thanking him, maybe, or just- fuck, you can't concentrate, you're so full.

Part of you mourns, even through the thick haze of your mind, knowing that he will pull out of you soon. But you're surprised to find that he doesn't, that he only needs a few moments before he's hard and pumping into you again. More sweet, incomprehensible words fall on your ears like so many shooting stars, and time continues to warp, and oh, fuck, the wave is cresting again-

---

When you wake, the first thing you become aware of is the fact that you feel so unbelievably relaxed. The second thing is that Donnie is holding you, stroking your hair and speaking to you softly.

You take a slow, deep breath, and his words stop, then start again. This time you push through the haze enough to actually listen.

“You haven't stopped smiling,” he says, his own smile audible in his voice.

His hand continues to brush through your hair, while the fingers of his other hand tap absent-mindedly against your thigh. It's nice. You bask in the feeling for a moment before you respond.

“It was like… like you said. The way you feel now, during your season. I just felt really… connected to you. Safe. And happy.” You sigh, snuggling in closer. “And really, really good. I don't know why you were so worried I would hate it.”

His hands stop. Then start again. When he answers, you can't hear the smile anymore. “It's only like that when- when you're with the person you…”

He trails off, and you wait for him to elaborate. He doesn't. The silence grows heavy. You pull back to look up at him, but he avoids your eyes, his lips thinning and his brows pinching together. You finish his sentence for him.

“The person you love?”

His throat bobs when he swallows, and his tiny nod makes your chest ache. To think that - even after everything you've been through - he was still unsure. Worried that the pill would not only make you miserable, but also that it would confirm your true feelings.

Or lack thereof.

“Donnie,” you start, but he cuts you off with a kiss. Slow, gentle, and intimate. He kisses you until you forget how to breathe, and when he finally pulls away you have to take a few moments to remind yourself of what you were going to say. “You thought I wouldn't-”

“I was wrong to worry,” he says simply, cutting you off once more. “I know that now.”

You consider pushing further, but the pleasant fog that still clings to your mind makes it hard to think. You close your eyes and breathe, trying to focus past the memory of his lips on yours. It’s hard when his hands still trail through your hair. When you open them again, he’s still avoiding your gaze.

“You know I love you. Right?”

His eyes finally meet your own, and you see something there. Something that’s too big to put a name to but that relaxes your concern nonetheless. He leans toward you to press a quick kiss to your forehead, and when he pulls back his lips have settled back into a soft smile.

“I know, dearest. I know.”

---

tag list: @yorshie @khayalli @thejudiciousneurotic @luckycharms1701 @mxalmighty @thelaundrybitch @justalotoffanfiction

#tmntspringshellebration #turtlecleric scrolls #rise!donnie #thank you again for proofing yorshie dear <3

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txttletale · 4 months

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Why did you choose a blank background? Why did you choose that specific coloration (no camo)? Why did you choose that specific angle (and not, say, one that places the viewer above the mi-24)? Why did you choose that specific level of cartoonish softness, and not any more or any less?

Or were you not the one making any of those choices?

i obviously didn't make those choices although, note, i could have: ou only know i didn't because i shared my very simple and low effort prompt -- my prompt could have been 'mi-24 attack helicopter blushing demurely, blank background, front angle, slightly cube chibi style'.

& of course if i were an actual AI artist and was using a local stable diffusion model instead of futzing around on bing image creator, i could have given several prompts and weighted them, putting an exact 1-100 number on exactly how much cartoony softness i wanted, and generated multiple generations of images, picking the one that most fits my artistic vision and img2img generating four offshoots each time, until i finally picked an image that perfectly matches what i want from a hundred different permutations .

but of course, none of that is salient to the point that post was making, which is that there is obvious and undeniable self expression and intentionality behind even the laziest and least interesting AI art. the presence of unintentional elements or elements outside my control has no bearing on that!

(& of course, the idea that art having major elements that do not represent choices by the artist is not art quickly runs into the fact that, for example, all mediums have limitations -- or, for a more direct example, all outdoor and candid photography)

1950s comic about a socialist gumball machine

#ask #ai art

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noneorother · 4 months

Text

There's a *puppet* show going on in the magic shop, and it looks awfully familiar...

(Insert unhealthy number of rewatches here) The magic shop in S2 is a real jewel box. There's so much symbolism and so many easter eggs, it starts to make your head spin. But I found something really weird going on with the puppets (or should I say angels) in the background...

Here's 1941 : you can see on the left what looks like closed red curtains, and a coatrack with puppets behind Crowley here.

Where am I going with this? Well, don't those puppets look familiar?

For my money, they really look like silly versions of Crowley and Aziraphale, with a few other familiar puppets hiding on the other side of the rack.

Now here's that exact same shot in the present. The red curtain falls away to reveal: An extremely symmetrical arrangement of truly weird puppets. The puppet in the glass case near the back is the same.*

It probably just looks like a creepy display, with our familiar Aziraphale and Crowley puppets, until I do this:

To me at least, this arrangement really looks like a depiction of a synaxis of the hosts of bodiless powers (i.e. angels) before Jesus. If you study European art history, you can't escape medieval religious iconography. It's kind of a big deal. I've put this example of Mary flanked by the nine ranks of Angels from a Cathedral in Exeter above, but you can find 100 examples of this kind of eerily symmetrical and hierarchical ranking of angels with god, Jesus, Mary etc... Before I break it down, you have to know that in the medieval period, and especially in religious art and iconography, the relative size and position of figures is WAY more important than realism or accuracy.

Obviously the costumes don't match one to one, but you get enough of a vibe that once you start seeing it you can't UNSEE it. The relationships of position and size here are fascinating to me. For one, what the hell are two Crowleys doing in a host arrangement in present day? He's not even an angel. In the second row we have archangels Gabriel, the flopsy twins Uriel and Michael, and a slightly larger Saraqael head in the center. Is Saraqael actually more important here? Technically Jim is still an archangel, so he gets the mirror of the Gabriel position, but as a sad clown wearing a tartan blanket. We also have two tiny dolls (not puppets) with star name tags, one keeled over wearing brown, and one sitting up and smiling, wearing blue. I've named them tentatively Adam & Jesus for now, because that's the vibe I'm getting, but who knows. Here's the usual position of the Jesus in a synaxis for comparison.

In the lowest row, we bizarrely have arguably the most powerful angel, The Metatron (shown here with a dark floppy overcoat hiding the fact the doll has no body) and what I can only imagine is Maggie with blonde hair and blue eyes? What? Now, the doll I'm calling God in the middle for the large size, and the fact their head is always cut off above the framing in the shot. God is clearly looming large over the rest of the host, but is in a lower hierarchy (with Muriel, Crowley & Aziraphale being fairly low ranking at this point in the show) and also has NO HANDS, a clown face and BLOOD SMEARS on their overalls. Yikes. If you take a look at the top-down shot of the dolls, you can see how they had to completely redo the god-doll's hair. This is a specific vintage English doll called "Bimbo the clown". You can see the original hair always has a fringe, and the yarn locks are usually much bigger. Compare with the new hair in the top view of the present-day shop.

Hey. Does that hair style look familiar to anyone?

Look. I don't want to go claiming something THIS insane from one doll's hairstyle in a background shot. I'm not trying to convince you this is irrefutable proof that there's some sort of storyline where Nina is actually God. But it's interesting they took the trouble to re-make the doll's hair (and costume) to look like Nina's, even when it is almost never seen, much less noticed. The fact that the god-doll is also a clown got me thinking of the Gabriel and Jim dolls, and that maybe there's another doll in the shop that should double with Bimbo? *Here's the only other doll with a name card in the magic shop in either time, the one in the glass case :

Even though we barely see it, we can tell it's wearing the same outfit as the 1941 magician. Why? If this one is the equivalent of the real god, and not the sad clown version, and if it's locked up in a box somewhere, unable to free themselves, is that why we haven't heard from them in season 2....? So many questions. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Thanks to @kimberleyjean and @embracing-the-ineffable for additional pictures.

#good omens meta #good omens 2 #art director talks good omens #go season 2 #good omens season two #go meta #good omens season 2 #good omens prime #go2 #crowley x aziraphale #good omens 1941 #1941 minisode #good omens #good omens analysis

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warriorcatsofficialfacts · 15 days

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Can you share more about the ableism in warrior cats? I always hear it talked about but I haven't read it since I was a kid so I don't remember.

this is a complicated thing to discuss bc on some level the ableism in warrior cats has its roots in the sheer amount of value this cat society places on physical strength but here are the like. basic bullet points i guess

1. use of ableist slurs

the terms "cripple" and "lame" are used in the books, both of which are insults to the physically disabled, cripple being considered an active slur most physically disabled people agree ablebodied people shouldn't even say. i Have had one person defend this by pointing out that the characters who use the term cripple are using it As a slur: it's meant to be a depiction of jayfeather as a protagonist experiencing ableism

i countered this with pointing out that mentally disabled people do not have to worry about opening up a warrior cats book and having to read the pov character be called the r slur, nor do gay people have to worry about opening up a warrior cats book and having to see the pov be called a faggot or a queer. The issue is not the use of ableist slur itself, but instead the fact that it is the Only instance of a character being called an irl slur or curse word. i should not have to explain why it's not appropriate for books to contain slurs when they're not even allowed to say Fuck. if these were books where real life bigotry and bigoted terminology were used frequently and not only for physical disabilities, i would see no issue with jaypaw being called a cripple by two ableist jackasses

however even with that out of the way there's still the fact that disabled characters are referred to as Lame more than once, not by an ableist character, but by the Narration. that's not a character being a bigot, that's the Books being bigoted

2. disability as a plot device to serve abled characters

the most obvious instance of this is snowkit (who i often call a "walking hate crime" for this exact reason), but it's fairly consistent that disabled characters almost never solely exist for their own sake, but always to say something about the abled people around them or have an impact on those people

snowkit dies to traumatize his mother, his deafness being directly related to his death. jagged peak is made a paraplegic to demonstrate clear sky's cruelty to even his own family. briarlights paralysis is routinely shown through the lens of other people debating or discussing her worth and impact on her. cinderpelt loses movement in her leg both to emotionally impact fireheart and to be yet another person who's life has been impacted by tigerclaw. brightheart is permanently disfigured so that bluestars cruelty towards her can act as yet another step in her progression to madness, and so that firestars renaming of her can establish him as a more benevolent leader (sort of patching up his predecessors wrongdoings).

there are a few exceptions, crookedstar in particular is pretty good.

3. arc one exclusive: disability or disfigurement as a sign of menace

i generally say arc one is the best on ableism simply because it treats disability as a Fact that Will inevitably happen to all warriors (this is why basically Every elder is disabled). but there is one thing that. I think people forget? A Little?

Outside of elders, there are a decent number of arc one cats who are described as being disfigured or disabled outside of thunderclan

if i'm remembering correctly, these are crookedstar, brokenstar, deadfoot, and clawface. only two of these cats (crooked and dead) are intended to actually be Disabled (even though brokenstar has a SCI if you know how cat spines work), but all of them are meant to be visually disfigured, with brokenstar having an obviously deformed tail, and clawface having distinctive facial scarring

it's probably pretty easy to figure out why i'm bringing up broken and claw, since. they're both murderers. but here's something that's easy to miss:

crookedstar is rather consistently antagonistic in arc one and deadfoot is explicitly considered to be intimidating by fireheart. deadfoot is the least egregious, he is a deputy afterall so it makes sense fireheart is menaced by his presence, but crookedstar is very much like. he openly declares he intends to take over windclans old territory along with shadowclan. people tend to forget but riverclan is Mean in arc one, Crookedstar Included.

that's 4/4 of the non elderly disfigured characters in arc one who are meant to be somehow intimidating at best, and menacing, antagonistic, and evil at worst. not great numbers. btw the reason i'm not counting cinder and bright here is because those are previously abled characters who then Become disfigured and disabled, meanwhile these four are introduced as disfigured and/or disabled, which is a bit different from a meta perspective.

4. outside of arc one, a universal perspective that disabled characters cannot be warriors

now, this isn't really a Thing in arc one. there's only One character who is explicitly made to stop being a warrior because she's disabled, and even then it's not that she Couldn't be a warrior: her broken bone healed wrong and warrior duties would be constantly painful for her.

however after arc one there are very few New disabled characters at all, and all of them are medicine cats or elders. longtail is blinded and almost immediately retires (even though that doesn't seem super in character for him), jayfeather tries his best to be a warrior despite the complete and total uselessness of everyone around him but is eventually forced into medicine cat duties by god anyway, briarlight is genuinely just a medicine cat in all but name, and if you count shadowsight (which. honestly i don't think you should) he's also a medicine cat

i just. feel the need to point out that arc one specifically had brightheart get taught how to be a warrior by her abled boyfriend but somehow none of these cats could accommodate Themselves. I guess accommodations only exist if you're Half blind or have an abled boyfriend to save you from your own body

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chirpsythismorning · 4 months

Text

Still going down the Surfer Boy number rabbit hole and it's getting fucking weird.

Basically I wanted to confirm that the number was visible on merchandise that is still dropping, specifically that Transformers collaboration because I heard about it vaguely, but didn't actually look at it myself to confirm.

And what I discovered is that the number changed...

Original number: 805-45-PIZZA

New number: 775-38-PIZZA

Now, when I saw this I was like SHIT this new number must mean that the original isn't important because apparently they had no problem changing it and leaving it unaccounted for.

But then I called the new number...

And low and behold it's the exact same voice. And mind you this voice is unrecognizable, like it doesn't sound like any automated voice I've ever heard before.

This is actually insane because tbh I did feel like I was reaching on that post yesterday where I talked about how the current message, which comes off like Netflix stopped paying the bill and the number is just unassigned now, could actually be a fake message with some sort of intention behind it.

And it appears that since these two numbers have the exact same voice and even use similar words... it is indeed intentional.

But what's even more crazy is the new message itself...

Current message for the original number:

The phone number you just dialed is available. 2499

Current message for the new number:

The phone number you just dialed has already been assigned to a customer and is parked at numbers dot m-e

Just for some clarity, if you want to check the message for the new number yourself please do. I am 97% certain that is what it says, but the very end I'm not as certain about. I would assume the word dot being used here signifies a period? But it sounds like after that is spells out the word me? So it's technically numbers.me?

I looked that up and it seemed like a dead end, just some telephone number solutions company.

Sort of leaving that part undetermined because I could be wrong about what it says.

What is noteworthy about this new message though is that it contrasts the original. The original number was referred to as 'available'. But the new number 'has already been assigned to a customer' and is 'parked'?

The message itself does sort of align with what people were probably expecting when they called the number after buying the transformer? Because they put it on there knowing people would call it and expect a message on the other end, and so it obviously had to match this idea of it being a pizza place answering. Which makes the customer and parking mentions make it seem like a pick up order or something?

But considering the original number's message has changed, and for some reason includes a mention of the number 2499 at the end, slightly off from the original 4992, I'm curious about what all these references to numbers being available vs. assigned and also changing could possibly mean?

We may know now that the original number is in fact a real (fake) message, and yet I still don't feel that much closer to cracking it.

What the hell is the original message hinting at? And what does this new message maybe add to it?

#byler #stranger things #surfer boy number #easter egg #surfer boy van #st theory #st5 predictions #i should say that as a twelvegate truther i'm not complaining #changing the first three numbers to 775 is actually so personal to me #also i still think the butterfly magnet is relevant in that shot of the number on the fridge...

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ponderingmoonlight · 9 months

Note

Can I request geto suguru with prompt 29. After the last angst u wrote, I figured I want to be hurt more, maybe y/n confronts him again and tries to get him back (fails miserably) 😭😭 keep writing, ur writing is really good 👍

Thank you so much for that request, I just had to write that immediately! Hope I shatter your soul in a good way love, enjoy and let me know what you think ♡

Dying ray of sunshine Part ll

Pairing: Geto x fem!reader

Word Count: 2,5k

Synopsis: After searching for your former boyfriend Suguru for 10 years, he finally shows himself again at the Night Parade. You try your best to convince him back into your open arms, but it seems like the man you love is gone forever.

Warnings: hurt (obviously), injury, lanuage, death

It’s been a while since you last saw him. 10 years, 6 months and 9 days to be exact. Somehow you managed to carry on, found a job in the center of Tokyo, cut your hair a little shorter, met up with Satoru from time to time. You’re a grown woman now, absolutely stunning as some might say. On the surface, everything is going great for you. Expect for the fact that you never let a single man touch your soul after Suguru.

Sorry, just doesn’t work I guess.

You block the number of the random man you’ve met last night without balling an eye and straighten your posture. No one seems to mesmerize you like Suguru did. Along with Satoru, you searched for him over the last years, still eager to find him and talk everything out. You know that he has a tender heart, that even after all this time you will manage to get him back, your Suguru. The promise you made will come true. Sooner or later, you will track down the traces of horror he leaves behind. Deep down you know that he would never hurt or let alone kill you. Just a few words, that’s all you need.

The ringing of your phone disturbs your peace rudely. A look at the screen reveals that in fact Satoru is calling.

“You know I have to leave for work soon, don’t you?”

“(y/n), he was here”, Satoro breathes out.

Immediately you jump out of your chair, blood rushing through your ears as your heart nearly pounds out of your chest. You know exactly who he’s talking about. Suguru was at Jujutsu High? Why? Maybe he wanted to sort things out, maybe he had a conversation with Satoru, maybe…Maybe he asked about you.

“What did he say? Is he still with you? Why was he there? Were you able to convince him to come back to us? How is he? Does he look fine?”, you babble out, mind racing faster than your mouth can follow.

“(y/n)…I think you should pay me a visit. Don’t expect anything positive though…”

Your heart sinks immediately, a wave of disappointment and foreboding rushes over you just like ten years ago. Nothing positive means something really bad must have happened. But still, this is the first personal contact the two of you had with Suguru since he left that day. This has to be a good sign, right?

“I’m coming right now”, you response hastily, put on your high heels and sprint down the halls with your car keys tinkling in your hand.

Jujutsu High isn’t far away from your home, but still the empty road feels like an eternity this day. You press your foot on the gas, don’t give a shit about the rain that starts to poor and the bad sight. He was there. Suguru was finally seen again, alive and speaking. You can’t help but shed a tear of joy while cruising down the street with enormous tempo. At some point you thought about giving him up, to stop searching for someone who doesn’t want to be found and who last told you that he wants to see you dead. But you never had the heart to call it quit, to simply throw all the time you’ve had together into the trash. This is your chance.

“Satoru!”, you cry out, dashing down the wet sidewalk into the center of Jujutsu High.

There he stands along with his students, all of them wearing thoughtful, anxious and competitive expressions. You are alarmed immediately. Satoru warned you, it is written on their faces that something pretty bad has happened.

“What’s going on?”, you breathlessly inquire, trembling hands pressed against your figure in order to stop you from shivering.

Your whole body seems to be electrified, still in absolute shock at this sudden opportunity.

“He was here. Suguru was here to announce war”, Satoru explains briefly, his gaze pinned to the grey sky above him.

“War?”

You can’t believe your ears. Is that the only reason he came here? To proclaim that he is going to take other innocent lives? You feel like fading, suddenly a breath-taking nausea overcomes you. This is not the Suguru you know, he’d never do that. Absolutely impossible.

“This has to be a misunderstanding, we both know that-“

“Sorry (y/n), it wasn’t. Apparently he doesn’t even stop at jujutsu sorcerers anymore…”

“B-But…This means he’ll come back, right? I will talk to him, I’m sure there’s a way to convince him to stop. After all, I was his girlfriend for so many years! I’m sure he’ll listen to me!”, you desperately try to convince Satoru.

“Ain’t no way I’ll take you to the battlefield. Forget that, (y/n). You’ll stay here, at Jujutsu High. I will talk to him first. Only when I can be sure that he won’t hurt you I will come and get you, understood? As a non-jujutsu sorcerer, you are completely at his mercy. I won’t lose you too.”

You can feel Satoru’s tense gaze eyeing you up and down while you urgently try to hold back tears. Of course he’s right, you know all too well that Suguru’s heart is clouded by grief and rage. He could kill you in a heartbeat before even recognizing that it’s you. But still, the thought of sitting here and waiting for Satoru’s call while your boyfriend is out there slaughters you from the inside. You waited 10 fucking years for this moment. How long do you have to wait until you can finally embrace him in your arms again, until you are reunited and get your well-deserved happy ending? It is so frustrating – hunting down the shell of the person you love most in this entire word and then not being able to talk this out.

“Did he ask about me?”

Your voice is a fade whisper, close to breaking like the finest glass. There is nothing you want more than to embrace him into your arms again, to feel his broad chest against your fingertips and let his delicious scent tingle your nose. Satoru’s heart breaks at the way you stare into the ground, the tears you try to hold back so badly glistering in your eyes. He can’t help but pull you into his arms, gently caressing your back just like he did on that fateful day that took your spark away.

“He asked me if you’re still around. I told him that you are searching for him”, Satoru whispers into your ear, making your heart shudder in hopefulness.

So he does care about you. After all the things that happened after the night ten years ago, you are still on his mind. Yes, this is a good sign. That means that he does in fact remember his feelings towards you, the beautiful moments you both shared.

“I will bring him back, Satoru.”

______________________________________________________________

“See ya, watch out for the little ones, (y/n)!”

“You’ll probably have to watch out for me, I’m no use when it comes to curses. Hopefully I’m not in your way”, you admit towards Maki and Yuta.

The boy in front of you smiles kindly at you while shaking his head.

“Oh please, don’t be so hard on yourself! You are a very impressive and strong woman, Gojo-sensei talks only positively about you!”

“I’m not able to see curses either, don’t let that stop or bring you down.”

A kind smile is plastered on your face, heart warmed by their kind words. It seems like Satoru is doing his job very well, apparently. You definitely need to tell him that when all of this is over.

“I’ll go back inside”, the girl named Maki announces, turns on her heels and leaves.

“Do you want to join?”, Yuta asks friendly towards you.

“Oh no, thank you. I will wait here.”

And with that, you are alone. Only you and the soft breeze that strokes your hair on this quiet cold day like every other. You can’t keep your mind still, everything revolves around Suguru and the prospect of seeing him. How will it go? Will he even recognize you? Your curves got a little rounder, jawline a little sharper and hair a little shorter. But your eyes. He should be able to tell that it’s you by your eyes. After all, he spent hours getting lost in their sight. Oh, the beautiful old days. Waking up next to him still sleeping, letting your needy hands wander around his muscular body, caress every inch of his delicate skin. Suguru is your blessing of a lifetime and he told you over and over that you are his ray of sunshine. Surely it’s not too late. It is never too late to change your path.

“Who do we have here?”, a voice behind you jeers.

You quickly get up on your feet, courageous gaze set in the direction of the unknown male.

But he isn’t unknown. You’d be able to recognize his long black hair and mesmerizing orbs anywhere. It’s him. God, Suguru is here. Still as breathtaking as ten years ago, face matured in the most delicate way. And that striking smile that is plastered on his face.

“Is that really you, Suguru?”

Ten years, ten whole years of your life you’ve been searching for him. Ten years without letting any man touch you in the way he did, ten years of constantly thinking about him and the unconditional love you hold for him deep within your heart. And now he’s finally here. Standing right in front of you, only about ten feet away.

His eyes examine you up and down. Can this really be true? He thought he’d never see you again. After all, he told you to run away this one time, he spared your life once. Suguru never expected to set is eyes on you alive.

“(y/n)”

His voice grew stronger and sounds a little deeper than you remembered. Oh, how badly you want to bury your face in his arms, beg him to come with you and forget about this madness. Maybe you’ll be able to laugh about what happened in a few years together.

“Over the past 10 years I searched you everywhere. Remember that promise that I made? I told you I’ll come back. And now we’re finally able to talk this out.”

Your voice is shaking. It feels like a far away dream to see him standing there, safe and sound right in front of your very own eyes. The horror of the last few years isn’t noticeable on his lovely face. You can’t help but close the distance between your bodies, every step feels like a victory. Yes, you can do this. You will convert him back to his normal self, to the sweet and loving Suguru everyone knows and loves.

“Wow, you actually managed to grow up even though you are nothing but a defenseless monkey. Congrats, (y/n).”

The sound of his stone cold voice and venomous words makes the world around you turn black. He called you a monkey again. Just like he did back then. You shake your head, determination plastered on your surface. No, you won’t give up so easily. This isn’t him.

“Suguru, this isn’t you. I know you better than that. You are the gentlest, most caring and loving soul I know, a man that would never hurt an innocent soul. You don’t have to do this. Please, let me help you out of this vicious circle, let me give you the attention you needed ten years ago. We can still fix this. I never stopped loving you.”

“But I did, (y/n). You are nothing but a stranger I share memories with for me. I forgot about you a long time ago”, he replies dryly, cold gaze staring right through your soul.

You swallow heavily when his words hit you like a bullet. It’s like you never knew him, disgust is plastered on his face. No…no, it can’t be! Your heartbeat picks up, hands balling into fist while your whole body hardens in agony. You didn’t threw your life away for him to stab you in the back like this. You didn’t love him for noting all these years. This just can’t be true. He just doesn’t want to let you too close, a coping mechanism to defend his current way.

“Kill me right now then, I dare you!”

Your blood-curling scream hangs heavy in the thick air between both of you, waiting for any reaction, any words, any twitches. Only to be greeted by a small grin and his eyes filled with so much hatred that it leaves you completely motionless.

“Your wish is my command.”

In the split of a second you are torn into the hard ground beneath, multiple bones in your body cracking at the invisible force that seems to burry you alive. Your lungs are out of air, all you can do is stare at the grey sky above, heart completely shattered by the love of your life all over again. Salty tears mix with your blood, plastering your sight in crimson.

“You’re just fucking hilarious, don’t you think? Mark my words before you die, you mean absolutely nothing to me. (y/n), you are nothing but an insignificant shadow and embarrassment of my past, a freaking monkey that has no place in this world, not worth my time. And that is exactly how you will die today. I won’t give you another chance to escape.”

His words seem to slowly fade away. Every time you woke up you reached for him, but he was never there. You want to tell yourself that there’s still hope, that there’s a small chance to convince him to return back into your open arms.

But it’s too late.

He will never be the Suguru that loved you so dearly ten years ago. He will never be the Suguru that held you in his arms all night, that told you over and over again how much he loves every inch of your body. He will never be the Suguru that came home to you after an exhausting mission with a bouquet of flowers in his hands and a tired smile on his face. He will never be the Suguru you wanted so badly to bring back. No, this version of Suguru is dead. The man who’s bending over you right now with a satisfying grin decorating his features is a stranger, the shell of the man you used to know and love.

With a single tear escaping your eye, you steal one last glance of him and your past, present and future glistering in his emotionless orbs.

You failed him. And he will never be the same man again.

#jjk #suguru x y/n #geto suguru #getou suguru x reader #jjk suguru #geto #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu geto #suguru x reader #suguru geto #suguru x you #geto x reader #geto x you #geto x y/n

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gaywarcriminals · 26 days

Text

How much lesbingqiu is there?

Since exactly One (1) person asked for the femslash slash stats on my post about the proportion of hetswap in the bingqiu AO3 tag, I have obliged.

I used the bingqiu tag and filtered by F/F. Obviously many of these results are F/F side pairings with M/M bingqiu, so from there, I counted them by hand.

I excluded crossovers from my search criteria, but I did a separate search to include the fics tagged with both SVSSS and Scumbag System. At time of writing there were 257 and 18 fics respectively, or 275 total.

I have included fics with multiple pairings and polyships. Iirc this was only relevant to Bingliushen.

I counted collection fics that had at least one fembingqiu ficlet/chapter.

I included art posted to the archive.

I included podfics posted to the archive, and counted them and the fics they were based on as two separate works.

I am excluding fics where male characters' bodys or genitals are temporarily changed for a plot device but the characters maintained their original gender identity.

By these criteria, I counted 140 lesbingqiu fics on AO3. At time of data collection there are 7005 total fics in the bingqiu tag, meaning lesbingqiu makes up 0.01999% of the bingqiu tag

For funsies, I have also noted instances of trans bingqiu!

I am including fics where amab Shen Yuan Transmigrates into a cis woman and decides they're okay with this body in the trans category.

If gender was not mentioned in a fic I defaulted to cis.

I am lumping all iterations non-binary bingqiu into the trans category, including afab non-binary bingqiu.

Not all fics with trans characters are tagged as such, so I skimmed any fics I was unsure of, but I'm sure I inevitably missed some.

Cis bingqiu - 118 Trans SQQ x cis Binghe - 8 Trans Binghe x cis SQQ - 6 T4T bingqiu - 4 Monsterfucking body weirdness, gender fucky omegaverse, or high tier SQQ gender shenanigans that I didn't know how to categorize - 4

Reflections

WAY LESS THAN I THOUGHT??? I think my perception has been skewed by what a high proportion of my fandom friends are lesbians, and how often femslash AUs feature in our discussion.

Similarly, the fact that there are only four T4T fics was genuinely shocking to me-- I forget sometimes what a bubble I'm in lmao. I also noted that trans bingqiu was a more recent development, at least on AO3; the first fic I found to feature trans girl SQQ was from January of 2022.

I don't have exact numbers because I didn't think of it until halfway through, I noticed that in almost all the NSFW fics where just one of bingqiu was trans, the trans girl topped. This was an interesting mirror to the trend I've noticed where, in cases where just character is a trans man, he almost always bottoms. I'll shelve speculation about that for another post tho.

#This is the adult equivalent of counting my favorite rocks #some times you just want to count and/or sort things (normal neurotypical sentence)#svsss #luo binghe #shen qingqiu #genderswap #genderbend #lesbingqiu #bingqiu #fandom meta #fish meta

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rrxnjun · 2 years

Text

annoying (derogatory). ldh

pairing: lee donghyuck x fem! reader genre: college au, halloween au | crack(?), fluff wc: 3k (2.920) warnings: too much alcohol, kind of rushed and very stupid a/n: i know its technically not halloween anymore but this idea came to me this morning and i just had to write it. haven't posted anything in a while and i missed writing a lot <3 also thank you @decembermoonskz and @yaesnovels for the help with this fic!

you arrive at a halloween party only to find out your biggest nightmare came true in real life: you accidentally wear matching couple outfits with your biggest enemy. or where annoying (derogatory) turns into annoying (affectionate).

Black skinny jeans, blue jean button-up, black shoes and a tacky black coat. Your eyes meet with none other than your main enemy, a shit-eating grin slowly creeping at his face making you freeze in your spot and arch your back like an angry cat when you realise a fact that is immediately confirmed by the snicker coming from behind your ear.

“Your couple costume is so good guys, didn’t know you were dating-”

“Jeno, shut the fuck up. You know damn well this is not a couple costume,” you mutter, not liking the fact that your friend is feeding into this situation.

“Oh,” Jeno blinks, faking a surprise, “but he’s Edward. And… you’re Bella… isn’t it a couple costume, then?” he asks, pouting, acting lost in thought.

“No, it’s not-”

“Just admit that you planned this all along, Y/N,” Donghyuck grins, “you wanted to match with me, obviously.”

“I did not! I didn’t even know you’re going as Edward. If I knew, I wouldn’t have gone as Bella, for fuck’s sake,” you mourn in agony, hating the Halloween party you were invited to already, solely for the fact that you’re accidentally wearing couple costumes with the guy you hate the most on this earth.

Lee Donghyuck has been on your death wishlist for as long as you’ve known him. His annoying (derogatory) attitude and the confidence he radiates was already a hint for you that you wouldn’t like him when you first met him at university, but it was only solidified on one sunny day when he made fun of your haircut. Yeah, it might have been a bad, terrible haircut– you can even admit that– but he really didn’t have to call you Dora the explorer every time he saw you at campus until your hair didn’t grow back. Yes, this was the exact situation that made you hate the guy more than you hate anything in this world. Some would say you’re petty. You just think you’re being reasonable.

“I talked about it in the groupchat!” Hyuck exclaims, referencing the Whatsapp group chat you’re both in because of mutual friends.

“Well, I have your number blocked so I don’t have to read your annoying messages every morning,” you snap, seeing Donghyuck only smile at your frustrated figure, making you more annoyed.

“I’ll have you know, Ryujin enjoys my good morning texts,” he smugly proclaims, shrugging.

“Yeah,” you nod, “because she lacks common sense,” you add, seeing the man in front of you snicker at your nasty remark, loving the sight of you all worked up and frustrated.

“Don’t be mean,” he says, “I thought that was my job. Or, at least, that’s what you told me when I called you Dora-”

“Oh, shut the fuck up, not this again,” you roll your eyes at him, not wanting to see the look on his face he always has when he teases you. “See? He’s being annoying again-” you turn around, wanting to find comfort in Jeno, only to realise he’s no longer watching over your little quarrel, but is standing in the corner of the room with his friends from class instead, drinking out of a small red cup.

Turning back around to see Donghyuck leaning on the kitchen counter, hands resting at the very top, you try hard to ignore the grin on his face. Catching him eyeing you from head to toe, you furrow your brows and shake your head in disapproval. “Stop staring at me, weirdo.”

“Just wanting to see if you’ve done a better job than me, that’s all.”

“Yeah, sure,” you sigh, walking over to the kitchen counter, looking for a cup that would contain something you’d enjoy drinking– because you can’t even smell vodka without wanting to physically carve your stomach out of your body (you’d call this reflex your bad flashbacks from war)– Donghyuck’s voice lands into your ear once again, possibly the effect of his figure standing so close to yours.

“Chill out already, would you? Let’s dance,” he says, pointing his chin towards the living room, resonating with roaring music and filled with various other people from your university, all dressed in costumes. A rumor has it that Johnny-- the host-- was kicking out everyone that came without one, and with how much this guy loves Halloween, you don't even try to doubt the information.

You huff, laughing at Hyuck's proposal. “I would rather die than to dance with you, Lee Donghyuck.”

Silence– well, to a certain extent, with the loud EDM music playing in the background– overtakes the two of you after your response, your eyes still searching through the sea of alcohol poured in various red cups over on the kitchen counter, eyebrows furrowed in concentration. Do these people really not drink anything other than vodka and cheap beer? Sighing in disappointment, almost reaching for the beer– because everything’s better than vodka– a hand holding a single red cup comes into your rear point of vision, making you look up at your silent companion in confusion.

Taking the cup into your hand and sniffing, your eyes meet your supposed enemy, to which he expressionlessly says: “Rum and coke. I know vodka makes you puke.”

“Thanks,” you say, hesitantly taking a sip and averting your gaze from the male, taken aback by his sudden act of service.

“Will you dance with me now?”

Sighing, you shoot him a glance, seeing the shit-eating grin appearing on his face again, making your blood boil at unreachable heights. “I will kill you tonight, Hyuck.”

“We’ll see about that, spider monkey.”

“Oh, you two look amazing together-”

“We’re not a couple,” you cut off the stranger passing you by on your walk down the street, sighing to yourself.

A few drinks, screams at the top of your lungs on the dance floor and selfies in your Halloween costumes later, you two and another few friends– the most sober ones of the group– were sent on a McDonald’s run. You argued that you could just order pizza, or that you could just get Postmates, but Jisung got too drunk to remember how it works and insisted on you getting it personally, because, quote, the stranger could eat his chicken wings, and, well, Jeno can never say no to Jisung, so… here you are.

“Not gonna lie, dudes,” Mark says, laughing to himself, “the disgusted look on Y/N’s face every time she has to explain this to someone is the only thing keeping me going right now.”

“I’m glad that at least someone is having fun,” you mutter under your breath.

“Who said he was the only one? I am enjoying this,” Donghyuck snickers, walking by your side as if to annoy you even further. Every time his hand accidentally brushes against yours as you walk– because even though you’re the most sober of the group, the amount of rum and cokes you’ve drank tonight is still enough to make you walk a little to the side– makes you want to turn around on your heel and scream into an endless void full of your misery.

Every time you see the man next to you grin with his perfect pearly whites, the hairs on your arms stand up in nerves, your stomach feels funny and the pit on the very bottom of it only deepens. You’ve never felt this much frustration, annoyance and anger towards someone. Normally, you’re a pretty chill person– it’s just that Lee Donghyuck is a menace to society and to yourself twice as much.

Walking into the McDonald’s that’s luckily only a few streets away from Johnny’s house, you stand in line and wait for your turn to finally order the endless list of meals the group waiting back at the party managed to stick together. Looking around, seeing a long line of teenagers dressed in various costumes, you find a new sense of appreciation for humanity. Isn’t it funny how once a year, we dress as someone else for one day just because we feel like it? Humans are actually pretty cute, if you think about it.

Lost in your thoughts, you almost don’t notice Donghyuck talking to someone that’s standing behind him. His words blur in your tipsy mind, allowing yourself to relax for just a bit and calm down before you have to carry the bags with food down the street again, back to the party, when the words girlfriend and Bella startle you awake.

“Yeah, it took me so long to convince her to come as Bella, ‘cause she always refuses to watch the movies with me, but she loves me too much, so she finally agreed-”

“What the fuck are you talking about, Donghyuck?” you ask, not even having enough energy to scream at him anymore, just furrowing your brows in resignance.

“Don’t mind her, she gets a little grumpy when she’s drunk, right, sweetie?” Hyuck grins at you as he puts an arm around your shoulders, pulling you close. The smell of his showergel mixed with the cologne he uses– strawberries and coconut with just a hint of pinewood– hits your nose, making you swim in a weird sense of comfort and jumpiness. You once told him he uses too much cologne. He joked that it was so you would notice him, but ever since, the smell of his cologne has become less prominent, the sweet mix of strawberries and coconut making itself more known to your nose every time he was close to you in any way.

“We’re not even dating…” you lock eyes with the stranger dressed like Batman as you sigh, seeing the confusion in his hooded eyes when they jump from your figure to Donghyuck’s close to each other in a comfortable embrace.

Standing in the line at McDonald’s, various grinning teenagers pointing towards you two and telling you what a cute couple you are, you grow tired of explaining to them that your matching costumes are a mere coincidence. And with Lee Donghyuck sabotaging your every attempt at getting it straight and telling everyone that you actually hate your supposed other half, it becomes impossible to spread your truth, and so you just eventually stop trying.

Drinking so much the world is spinning and you feel hot in your cheeks, talking in the kitchen with Jaemin, Jeno and (ignoring) Donghyuck, you feel like this evening couldn’t get any better. You see, you may sound like an alcoholic right now, but the more rum and coke you drink, the less you mind Hyuck’s annoying teasing and the bad music choices from the resident DJ Jungwoo. You asked him to play Pitbull twice. He refused both times, and if that’s not a sign of a bad DJ, you don’t know what is.

Laughing at a joke Jaemin made, you momentarily lock eyes with Hyuck before you jump up in surprise at a loud scream coming from behind your back.

“Bella! Where the hell have you been, loca?!”

Turning around, you see a tall man with a wig on, wearing the most ratchet outfit cut out of a 2009 movie– there was no doubt, this was none other than Xiao Dejun dressed as Jacob from Twilight. Laughing at the whole situation– because there’s nothing else you’re able to do now, after realising that the three of you accidentally wore the costumes of a love triangle without knowing the other’s intentions, you watch as the man replicates the scene from the movie and runs towards you to pick you up into a spinning hug.

“This is getting ridiculous,” you giggle when he puts you on the ground.

“Why? You didn’t plan this?” he asks, seemingly not knowing about the rivalry between you and Hyuck as his eyes dance from him to you, seeing you shake your head in disapproval.

“Don’t listen to him if he tries to tell you otherwise, but no, we did not plan this,” you laugh, seeing Dejun join you in the little moment of you slowly going crazy.

“Well, that’s just great, because that means I can drag you to the dancefloor without Edward here getting mad at me!” Dejun yelps as he physically drags you to the living room by your right hand, body swaying to the beat of the never-stopping EDM music playing through the speakers. You don’t really remember you and Dejun being this close, you only had a few classes with him last semester, but it seems that the alcohol level in your blood is no longer letting you have any barriers tonight. Eyes shortly switching to the kitchen– completely subconsciously, really– you notice Donghyuck staring at the two of you with a cold look, jaw clenched. It only adds to the costume of Edward, you’d say, since you don’t remember the man having any other expressions in the movie, but the sight of Hyuck looking like that makes you a little taken aback, since you’ve never seen him with this face before.

“Are you sure you two didn’t come together? ‘Cause Edward Cullen over there looks a little jealous, if I may say so myself,” Dejun screams into your ear, making you roll your eyes at the comment.

“Don’t mind him,” you shake your head, “we hate each other.”

Dejun’s eyes widen at your last sentence, surprise overtaking his features. “Really?”

“Yeah,” you snicker, “he called me Dora the explorer for two months after I got a really bad haircut, I can’t stand that guy,” you laugh, seeing Dejun only snicker as he takes your right hand and rises it towards the ceiling, urging you to twirl for him like a ballerina.

“Well, that’s understandable,” he laughs, “even I’d hate him for that, if I was in your place.”

When the song ends and Dejun finds another familiar face in the corner of the living room, you find yourself sitting on the abandoned sofa in the middle of the room, finally letting yourself take deep breaths and try to force your head to stop spinning. Fanning your face before you take off your statement Bella zip-up hoodie, you let your eyes rest for a moment as you notice the sharp pain in your left temple– the first sign that you’ve had enough alcohol for tonight. Telling yourself you’re only gonna stay until you don’t feel a bit better, you try to force your brain to not shut off, before a painful slap to your thigh startles you awake as the sofa dips next to you with the weight of another figure.

“You okay?” you hear the all too familiar voice of none other than tonight’s Edward Cullen. After so many hours of being around him, you don’t even hate it as much anymore– in the loud screaming of the evening, you’d even consider it a safe haven.

Humming in agreement as you nod, you notice his hand on your thigh lightly massaging the spot he slapped before, the touch of his hand burns your clothed skin, sending shivers down your spine. “You want some water?” he asks, but as you shake your head to say no, there’s not a single thought in your head as you focus on the motion of his fingers on your leg, thinking of how you’ve never seen him so caring before, making you believe that maybe if he wasn’t so annoying towards you, you wouldn’t hate him as much.

“Do you want to go home?” he asks again, making you want to curse at him for breaking the silence (well, not really, since the havoc is still happening and the music is still playing), but instead, you only hum and cover his hand on your thigh with your palm, not even thinking about your actions. The danger of drinking is that you never know when the drink you have is the last one that takes you over the edge of having fun to being absolutely fucking miserable, and you think that the one you had right before Dejun dragged you to the dance floor was exactly the one doing just that.

“In a bit. Want my head to stop spinning so much first,” you say, letting your head drop onto his shoulder, enjoying the calmness of the situation after the stress and loudness of the whole night.

The smell of strawberries and coconut overtakes the smell of alcohol lingering in the room, calming your senses and making you wonder why you never gave Hyuck a chance before. It’s not like he was wrong about the haircut, after all…

“I’m team Edward, just by the way,” Donghyuck mumbles into your ear, making you snicker. To think you were considering that he wasn’t so bad just a few seconds ago…

“You know, Hyuck, I’m starting to think you’re an actual vampire, with how you’re sucking out my energy the whole evening,” you mutter, hearing the boy laugh at your comment before his tone turns suggestive as he leans even closer to your ear.

“Maybe I can suck your neck instead, like an actual vampire, you know-”

Feeling hot in your cheeks from the comment that just escaped from between his lips, hating the way it made you feel all funny in your stomach, you sigh and move away from him, standing up from the sofa in urgency. “I’m actually going to kill you, you know-”

“Oh, come on,” he giggles, taking you by your hand and dragging you back down to the sofa, “sit for a bit and then I’ll walk you home, okay? I was only joking…” he says, seeing you roll your eyes, but your body slides deeper into the sofa cushions, getting comfortable. “Unless…?”

Yeah, never mind. Lee Donghyuck is still the most annoying (affectionate) human being you’ve ever met in your whole, entire life.

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fullmoonfireball · 6 months

Text

Pikmin 2 Personality Quiz Translation

quick disclaimer: I am not especially fluent in Japanese, I'm just some shmuck trying their best, so take these translations with a grain of salt. especially since there's some i'm really unsure of here.

feel free to play along with this link! or just scroll all the way down to the "results" section at the bottom if you just want to see the descriptions

Thank you for Accessing [This Page]

Ahh, thank you! You came right away. I'm so happy.

Hey... If you don't mind... I could examine your personality!

View Content

(note: there's some usage of katakana in the paragraph where it typically wouldn't be, notably for the pronouns 'watashi' and 'anata', so I decided to bold those.)

Pikmin Personality Quiz

Q1: What is the most important thing in your life?

Friends

Money

Family

......

Myself

Q2: Of the following 5 colours, which do you prefer?

Red

Purple

White

Yellow

Blue

Q3: Who can you not say no to?

My parents

My lover

My boss

Myself

There isn't anyone (None)

Q4: What word best describes your lifestyle?

Fearful

Perky

Heart-pounding

Voracious

Impulsive

(note: these are all onomatopoeia in the original, so an exact translation would be impossible, or at least unreasonable. hopefully this does the job fine.)

Q5: You're flying in a spaceship. What happens to you next?

I crash

I sleep

I explore an undiscovered planet

I fall

I go back home

(note: "I fall" could equally be "I fail". it's hard to say with so little context, but either way it's not good.)

Q6: How much money do you have saved up?

No more than 100 yen

No more than 1000 yen

No more than 10,000 yen

No more than 100,000 yen

More than that! I'm rich!

(I'm here for translations, not currency conversions, but this would be (in USD, since I'm pretty sure most of you are American even though I'm not): $0.67, $6.67, $66.72, and $667.21 respectively. the fact this was probably made for children really shows here.)

Q7: What's your favourite game?

The leisurely Animal Crossing.

Pikmin, of course.

As expected, it's Zelda.

Obviously Mario, right?

Actually, it's none of these.

Q8: What's your favourite creature?

Pellet Posy

Iridescent Flint Beetle

Bulborb

Waterwraith

Pikmin

Q9: What's your LEAST favourite creature?

Beady Long Legs

Titan Dweevil

Bulborb

Breadbug

Bumbling Snitchbug

(note: this quiz seems to specifically be related to the New Play Control version of Pikmin 2, so the inclusion of the Titan Dweevil isn't QUITE as spoilery as it seems on first glance)

Q10: What's your favourite place?

Valley of Repose

Awakening Wood

Perplexing Pool

Wistful Wild

Inside the Onion

Q11: During a space trip, you're met with an accident, and end up shipwrecked on an uninhabited planet. What kind of planet is it?

A jungle planet

A sandy planet

A mechanized planet

A planet of bugs

It's actually Earth

Q12: If were shipwrecked on an uninhabited planet and could only bring one thing with you, what would it be?

My secret safe

My Game Boy Advance

My passbook

Lunch

A novel

Q13: If you were to start a family in the future, how many children would you have?

None

One

Two

I don't know

A lot

Q14: How would you describe your interactions with others?

Passionate

Cool

Devoted

Easy to get carried away

I don't care

Q15: Seriously, how old are you?

10 or less

20 or less

40 or less

60 or less

What a rude thing to ask!

Check your personality!

(note: if you click this button before answering all of the questions, you will get a popup saying "Q[earliest unanswered number] has not been entered.")

RESULTS

Your personality is [most like]...

The President.

Your strength is that you are honest about your feelings. Your energy as a leader is undefeatable.

However, you should maybe consider other people's feelings at least a little bit.

THIS → is the perfect partner for you!

Your perfect match is...

The President's wife.

She's straightforward about her feelings, more so than you.

She always toys with you.

However, that's because she believes in you.

→ Back

(note: I have absolutely zero confidence in that middle sentence.)

Your personality is [most like]...

Olimar.

A hard-working man who loves his family. He is popular among the Pikmin for his leadership.

However, he's a bit unlucky.

THIS → is the perfect partner for you!

Your perfect match is...

Olimar's wife.

No matter how destitute, she will always support you with great love.

There can be no secrets (such as a certain safe) between lovers or husband and wife.

You two can keep it together and not let the recession get to you.

→ Back

Your personality is [most like]...

Louie.

You're not so good at communication. People tend to misunderstand you, and have no idea what you're thinking.

Maybe you should voice your feelings more often?

THIS → is the perfect partner for you!

Your perfect match is...

Louie's nana.

Her narrow eyes make her look like she can't see anything. But trust me, she definitely sees the real you.

Even if it's hard, please indulge her as much as you can.

→ Back

(note: another really hard phrase to translate on the partner pages, yowch. this time, it was the last line of her description.)

Your personality is [most like]...

The Hocotate Ship.

On the outside, talkative to the point of being a blabbermouth.

But on the inside, actually a bit dry.

THIS → is the perfect partner for you!

Your perfect match is...

Mr. Beady Long Legs.

A strong personality that will really shake your heart. Whether it's out of fear or love, your heart will keep thumping.

Once you get over these feelings, a new you awaits...... Probably.

→ Back

(note: because "さん" is gender neutral, this could equally be Ms. Beady Long Legs. hocotate ship yuri, i GUESS.)

Your personality is [most like]...

The Pikmin.

Serious and hard-working. Your strong suit is cooperating with others. The type to thoroughly devote yourself.

But maybe you could assert yourself a little more?

THIS → is the perfect partner for you!

Your perfect match is...

Mr. Bulborb.

It will lead you with a WILD personality.

A big maw awaits you.

Please look forward to some wild kisses.

→ Back

(note: again, could be Ms. instead)

#Rambles Into The Void #Vesper's Translations #Pikmin #anyways i got the hocotate ship and idk how to feel about that

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feelingautistic · 6 months

Text

I received a question from @nunee63 (hi, you're famous now) on one of my greenland shark facts and I wanted to take the opportunity to say I'm opening up my asks for shark-related questions so if you have a burning question about sharks or want more info on a fact, feel free to drop a question and I'll try to answer them when I can :)

Anyway, the question was 'how do we know the age of the oldest greenland shark?' and, to put it simply, we don't. Marine biologists estimate the greenland shark is between 272 and 512 years old but they couldn't give you an exact number.

When aging a fish, marine biologists tend to count the growth rings (similarly to the rings of a tree trunk) of the otoliths, a structure in the ears that help fish balance and hear. This doesn't work for sharks, however, because...they don't have otoliths, so marine biologists use the backbone of sharks, which also form these growth rings, instead.

This works well for some sharks but greenland sharks don't have growth rings on their backbones so instead marine biologists used radiocarbon dating. They were searching for carbon-14 that built up in high amounts in the eye lenses of sharks born after the early 1960s, when nuclear bomb testing had caused the isotope to leak into marine ecosystems.

Once they knew the age of some younger sharks, they could calculate the growth rate of the sharks and apply that to older sharks (simply by measuring how much the shark must've grown from birth and figuring out how long that would take). Obviously, this method isn't perfect, hence why there's such a large range, but it allows us to estimate the age of long-living animals and scientists are debating applying the same method to other long-living animals.

#marine biology #marine animals #shark #sharks #sharkblr #science #greenland shark #shark facts

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thedroloisms · 1 month

Text

just an essay bc it's been on my mind but the way that victimhood becomes a weapon on social media is so fucking stupid and counterintuitive to actual advocacy. people wielding "im a victim" as a defense not only in situations actually involving their specific case but also in basically every damn situation in the world is so ???? even in cases involving dream, for example, i will see people using his history as a means of defending him (it's really fucked up that you would accuse a victim of ___, he's an abuse victim i'm sure he won't defend ___ and that he'll ___) and while i understand where that sentiment comes from, the base assumption it's making is...nakedly untrue. and assuming its truthfulness can hurt victims moreso than it helps them.

being a victim isn't moralizing. being a victim doesn't make you a good person. suffering isn't absolution, and going through fucked up shit doesn't make someone "good." people equate abuser = bad person and victim = good person, and then assume that victims are incapable of abusive behavior or "problematic" internalized ideas. an abuser can't be neurodivergent, or mentally ill, or part of a marginalized group, and most importantly an abuser can't be a victim. the boxes of victim and abuser are strictly defined with no overlap. once you've been through something truly, verifiably, Fucked Up (tm), congrats! you get a certificate of eternal victimhood that prevents you from ever being a Real Bad Person ever for the rest of your life.

only that's not how real life works! it's just not! generational trauma leads to cycles of abuse that perpetuate themselves over whole generations of people! the kids that think that it's perfectly fine and a-okay for a parent to physically punish their children don't tend to be the ones with parents that don't lay a finger on them! and you know, it sucks. it sucks that you get nothing out of being hurt, that there's no fucking prize, that there are no suffering vouchers for you to cash in because of the abuse you suffered that can give you good-person-points. it sucks to endure all that shit for nothing. but the opposite idea of suffering making you a good person is the exact reason why some people preach about the miles they walked to school in the driving rain to excuse taking out their shitty temper on their small children.

being abused generally doesn't make one "better." if anything, trauma tends to fuck you up in ways that hurt you...and others. going through shit tends to make people worse. working to get better is something that requires actual conscious effort, not something that you are given as a side effect of going through hell. over and over again, traumatized individuals who are made to feel powerless and given little freedom and ability to change their circumstances, when in a situation where they are given power to some degree over some person, may choose to abuse that power while they're in their own abusive situation or after. part of being a victim of abuse often means having a distorted view of the abuse you've been through! it can mean normalizing fucked up behavior! looking at shit and treating it lightly because you've been taught that it's "not that bad," if you've been taught that it's bad at all! victims aren't granted perfect ideologies from god because they walked through flames--cult survivors usually have to unlearn all sorts of messed up beliefs that were drilled into them--beliefs that many people on twitter would then damn them for, because obviously if you've thought something like that in the past then you're a bigoted hateful individual.

i can only speak from my own experience, but i can't fucking count the number of people i've heard of or met or known personally who have been through some kind of trauma in the past, who are undoubtably victims of abuse, who then go on to act in toxic, manipulative, and abusive ways to others. oftentimes, these people are aware of the fact that they were in abusive situations in the past and make quite a big deal about the fact that they care about victims, as a victim, and want to advocate for them. they're the same people who react extremely negatively to anyone alluding to the idea that they could be abusive--they're not like that, they've been abused, how could anyone accuse them of abusing another person, don't they know how much that hurts with their history. and so on and so forth.

and...i have a lot of sympathy for these individuals, generally speaking. because as mentioned above, being abused in the past doesn't necessarily make it harder for you to be a perpetrator in the future. sometimes--oftentimes, even--it's the opposite. and i feel for them, because going through trauma and being hurt makes you scramble for ways to not be hurt again, and oftentimes the easiest answer for that (and the ways of solving problems as modeled to them in the past!) is control, and controlling another party can very easily slip into manipulative, abusive behavior. especially if you still have internalized ideas mixed in with the fear that surviving abuse entails, internalized ideas that are often left unexamined by people who believe that their victimhood absolves them from any further responsibility. i feel for people who are deathly afraid of ever being seen as terrible people, oftentimes because of the shit that they went through, who seek explanations for their abusers' behavior that make it so much easier to simplify the matter into "they're something separate from me, something that i can never become." i sympathize with the anger and fear and frustration and grief that might never had had a healthy outlet while in a past situation that ends up poured out into places where it shouldn't be in the present, i sympathize with the desire to find reason in being hurt where it doesn't exist, to want there to be something to make the whole damn thing worth it instead of having nothing to take with you but your pain.

but at the end of the day, that's not how life works. that's not how abuse works. yeah, there are abusers who are cruel for cruelty's sake, who are aware of the harm they do and desire to cause more--and there are just as many who genuinely believe that they're doing the right thing, that they're doing good, that they care for the one that they're hurting unselfishly and wholeheartedly. there are many, many people who hurt others because they have been hurt before, and this isn't an excuse--of course not--but refusing to acknowledge the ways that pain can perpetuate itself and blinding oneself to the possibility of their own actions ever being abusive can literally be how this pain continues. it's good to be self aware, it's good to want to do the right thing, but assuming that victims are good people because of the suffering they went through not only means that so-called "bad victims" (or anyone that's not yet Acceptably untangled the thought patterns and actions that have been normalized to them, or anyone who lashes out in quote-unquote appropriate ways as judged by whatever social media council is handing out social justice tickets for the week) get overlooked and ignored, but abusive patterns of behavior are allowed to continue to exist, just in a repackaged form with different language. it's not fair to victims to nail them to this standard of so-called righteousness that is also inextricably connected to their experiences, allowed to be revoked if they're too "abuser" to be "victim" anymore, or to overlook the victims of their behavior because their inherent suffering-borne righteousness keeps them from crossing the line into bad behavior.

at the end of the day, no one deserves abuse, victims deserve to be advocated for, and people who have been through horrific shit didn't deserve to go through horrific shit. but you don't get handed get-out-of-jail-free cards for being treated badly, you know?

#abuse #like ugh it's complicated #but i need people to stop using victimhood as a catchall excuse #and this isn't criticism of like. dr eam btw #who really hasn't ever used anything re: his experiences as an excuse as far as i can remember #it's one thing to say that 'these situations affected my actions' which is half of what this essay is abt #because yeah. going through shit affects your actions ... and not always for the better.#now the other ccs whose opinions ive been unwillingly subjected to over the last few weeks ? lol. lmao.#like look this idea of victimhood earning anyone anything is inherently damaging and completely untrue #sympathy and understanding extended towards abuse victims shouldn't be dependent on the morality points that they falsely earn #as a result of going through fucked up shit

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footballxixstars · 9 months

Text

Persuade Daddy • Antoine Griezmann

Child/Parent Prompt List v.2 • Number 7

“I want a dog” “I do too but you have to persuade daddy.”

“I want a dog,” Your daughter told you as the two of you were eating dinner together. Antoine was currently away for a football match so it was just you and your daughter having dinner together. It was nice to be alone with your daughter for some quality one-on-one time but at the same time you both missed Antoine when he wasn’t here, especially around the dinner table where it was more known. For a moment after your daughter spoke those words you were in shock but only for a minute or so because you were ecstatic over the fact your daughter wanted a dog. That now made two of you in the house that want a dog. Antoine can’t say no to both of you, majority wins, right?

“I do too, but you have to persuade Daddy,” You replied instantly, throwing Antoine under the bus with your daughter, however, it was only the truth so it’s not like you’re lying to your daughter plus it’s a family decision so you can’t just get a dog because the two of you want one. Before you had your daughter you had really wanted a dog but Antoine was always saying no. It was when you and Antoine had moved in together and it was amazing to finally be living together since you are able to see each other more frequently however when he would leave for the France National Team or be away for a couple of nights for away matches you would feel quite lonely in your house and the perfect answer for this would be to get a dog. Obviously, you spoke with Antoine about it and gave him your reasons for wanting a dog but for some unknown reason Antoine was strongly against getting one. He never said his exact reasons but Antoine not wanting one was enough of a reason for you to drop the conversation. Every now and then you would bring it up again to see if he had changed his mind but Antoine would shut it down instantly and once you had your daughter you never brought it up again. But now your daughter is older and apparently wants one so maybe it’s time to bring it up once again.

“Really?” She asked sounding really excited and also a bit sceptical at the same time like she didn’t expect you to say yes. Well, it was probably that you said yes straight away like that- well a part yes since you said that she has to get Antoine approval first.

“Sure, you just have to persuade your daddy first,” You reuttered to her letting her know that it is Antoine that she will have to get through to him if she really wants that dog. Instantly you saw this glint in her eye and you just knew that she took that as a challenge.

“I will. Daddy can never say no to this face,” she told you pulling a pouting face at the end of it. The one she pulls if she ever wants something or to do something and gets told no. The whole thing was true though. Your daughter could honestly get away with murder with Antoine so you would not be surprised if he instantly gives in when she asks. Either that or he would stutter for a bit before giving in to your daughter and getting her whatever dog she wants. Not your favourite parenting technique of Antoine’s but in times like this where you also want a dog it is wonderful.

“You do need to know how to take care of a dog and find out everything you need first though so it may be a while until we get one,” You explained trying to prepare her for the worst possible outcome of Antoine not agreeing and that even if Antoine agrees to the dog she won’t be able to get one right away because it doesn’t work like that. You have to find the perfect dog for your family. Your whole family is quite energetic and goes for walks often therefore a more relaxed dog who doesn’t have a lot of energy wouldn’t be good. There’s a lot of research that goes into having a dog so your daughter needs to be prepared and making her do her own research will also show Antoine that she is serious about wanting a dog and it may make him more likely to agree. Or agree quicker and you both probably need all the help you can get.

“I’ll go look now,” your daughter said seriously as she shoved that last bit of food into her mouth before getting off of her seat and making her way to the computer to do some research. You did chuckle to yourself at her seriousness of the whole situation but at the same time you thought that it was good because it meant that she really wanted a dog. All you could do though was chuckle and wish Antoine good luck because as soon as your daughter had an idea on her mind she would work towards it and make sure she gets it. She wants this dog and she will get this dog. One very stubborn child you have. Wonder who she gets that from?

——

A day passed and Antoine was finally home again. As soon as that door closed behind him your daughter was in his arms hugging him tight. Antoine probably just thought that your daughter missed him but you could see that she was sweetening him up, making sure that she was on his good side. There was another motive for this affection but Antoine was about to find that out. Let him enjoy his little moment with his daughter. If you looked past the other motive it was actually a sweet sight. Antoine had his eyes closed and a soft smile on his face whilst holding your daughter tightly against his own body and your daughter was clinging onto him. It was adorable really. Poor Antoine. He really had no idea what was coming.

“I want a dog Daddy,” was the first thing that your daughter said to him when he placed her back down on the floor. No hello. No, I missed you. Just, I want a dog. Straight to the point.

“What?” Antoine questioned, understandably confused by what your daughter had just said. Maybe he was just processing it all. He did look at you with a raised eyebrow and a questioning look on his face but you just shrugged your shoulders whilst doing everything you could to hold back the smirk and the laugh. After that, he turned his attention back onto your daughter hoping that she would explain where all this came from. To be totally honest Antoine probably thought that it was you getting your daughter to say it and fair enough since you have asked for a dog multiple times but not this time. This time it was fully your daughter's idea.

“I want a dog,” She repeated to him.

“Did you tell her to ask me?” Antoine questioned turning his attention away from his daughter and turning it to you with a slight glare. This time you did allow the smile to take over your face and you tried to make it look innocent but you knew that you were failing miserably.

“No. She asked me about it yesterday and I just told her to ask you,” Was all you told him.

“Can I have a dog?” Your daughter impatiently asked again, getting frustrated that he wasn’t getting a set answer from Antoine. He looked between you both for a couple of seconds like he was deciding whether or not to go through with it. Considering how often he works he knew that most of the dog care would primarily be down to you but still a dog is a lot of responsibility and a family decision. When it wasn’t during the football season the three of you like to go travelling so your daughter experiences different cultures but is that possible with a dog? There is so much to think about.

“Taking care of a dog is a lot of work. How about a pet- a pet- a pet rock?” Antoine finally got out.

“A rock!” She shouted, not believing what Antoine had just told her. She actually sounded a bit offended by it, by the fact Antoine wouldn’t allow her a dog but a rock. A rock that doesn’t do anything and is absolutely pointless because the child can't show that they can care for something. That is something that you’ve never understood however it is a little funny to offer them a rock instead of a fluffy animal. You were doing everything to hold back a laugh at the fact Antoine had just offered her a pet rock. At the same time you were just watching the interaction between the two of them. The way Antoine attempted to be strong and say no to your dog whilst your daughter just stared at him pouting. You could tell that Antoine was slowly breaking and would soon give in.

“Fine we’ll start looking into getting you a dog,” Antoine finally burst out at the smile your daughter let out was gigantic. You could tell that smile was worth everything for Antoine. He would do anything to get your daughter to let out a smile like that especially if he was the reason for that smile and if that meant agreeing to get a dog now then so be it. Anything to get her to be happy and smile like that. Once again your daughter ran over to him giving him a huge hug because he had agreed to get her a dog. Any dog that she wanted Antoine would get her if it puts a smile on her face and gets him hugs like this.

“Thank you, Papa,” She said over and over again.

“So what dog are we getting?” You asked cheekily and Antoine just glared at you whilst hugging your daughter close. This time you were unable to hold back the laugh so you were just standing there leaning against the wall laughing whilst Antoine was on the floor hugging your daughter and your daughter just kept babbling and rambling on about what dog she wanted to get. You could already tell Antoine was regretting his decision.

MASTERLIST | MORE GRIEZMANN

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