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uh-oh-its-bird · 1 month

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There are so many naruto time travel fics out there but what I need SPECIFICALLY is an ANBU era team of Kakashi, Tenzo, Itachi, and Shisui getting flung into the founders era.

Like. Ok just looking from the political side of it that's;

A) 2 very young and VERY powerful Uchiha's (one of which is the future clan head!! Politics!!)

B) A very fucked up baby mokuton user who's still in the middle of being deprogrammed and can totally pass for Senju

C) The free wild card that is Hatake clan lore on top of having a stolen sharingan. On top of *that* him being the team leader of a team of kids who, in the time period context, should both be at eachothers throats and probably not be expected to obey the commands of someone not only from another clan but a way smaller one

Theres SO much potential there!! So many political implications in virtually ALL of the directions!!!!

Yk what as I'm typing this out I'm having ✨️ideas✨️ so let's make some story points to sort those out:

• I think itd be neat to have this happen like. A year? Ish? Before the massacre? So age wise, and full disclaimer I'm referencing Google and Wikipedia rn so I could totally be wrong, I think that's :

Kakashi (18)

Tenzo (17)

Itachi (12)

Shisui (15)

Could be wrong about the ages but honestly it's my world you're just living in it, so.

Then me going totally purely off of my own headcannons, were going to say they came in a about a year before Izuna died and place the founders ages as:

Madara (23)

Hashirama (23)

Izuna (19)

Tobirama (18)

Big fan of Tobirama being the youngest between the 4 but projecting the aura of someone as old as like. Idk, however old Madara is. Very funny to me, 10/10

• I'm personally a big fan of dogteeth kakashi so we're running with that all the way home. Also a huge fan of the "Hatake's are a distant, more feral cousin of Inuzuka clan" hc along with some sprinklings of "back in the day they had a bit of a Reputation(tm) for being a 'lill wild, and everyone generally tries to avoid them. Which isn't too much of a problem because theyre a very small out of the way clan from Iron, they just have a big reputation in contrast to their size.

In more modern times tho, along with (obviously) having dwindled down to a single depressed teenager, they've become a lot tamer over the years due to village life. Kakashi is a Hatake, 100%, but he is NOT up to the standards of this time. Which becomes a bit funny when people see him, go "oh FUCK it's a Hatake" and then start edging slowly towards the door like he's about to rip their throat out with his teeth. Meanwhile he's standing there like 🧍‍♂️"am I that ugly."

Give me a scene where, finally used to this reaction to him from the general shinobi population, the team starts to use it to their advantage.

"Give us the scroll or we'll let the Hatake off the leash to have his fun with you. He's been awfully hungry latley you know, hasn't had fresh meat in days"

Kakashi, feeling kind of stupid, gave his best growl.

It caused an almost immediate, embaressed flush to rise to his face, but he didn't let up. It sounded more like an almost pathetic puppy growl than anything to his ears, but apparently it was enough to convince the trembling enemy nin because he slowly lifted the scroll up in offering.

Wow. Now he couldn't tell if he was embaressed for himself or for this guy.

Probably both to be honest.

• So like. Itachi is the clan heir. That's big. That's important. Let's do something with that.

First off, I had a great time reading this one fic (tho I don't even remember what the fic itself was about now, oops) where a plot point of it was how Sasuke is just a walking stereotype of main house Uchiha. Like people look at him and they don't just go "oh that's an Uchiha." They go "oh fuck that's an UCHIHA Uchiha." He's so fucking painfully, obviously related to the very tippy top of the clan that anyone not blind can tell. It's in the way he looks, it's in the way he talks and treats those around him, it's in the way he fucking holds himself. You look at him and every other stereotype about the Uchiha clan is there in big, bold letters. (On top of that he's also a dead wringer for Izuna, which I'm such a sucker for and desperatley wish people would do more with)

So like let's give that to Itachi here because it's so fun for several reasons.

First off; Sasuke in this is like. Straight up a doppelganger of Izuna, just a few generations apart. They could be twins. Itachi, as I'm sure you are aware, is Sasuke's big brother. So let's take some liberties and say that Itachi could absoloutley pass as a blood sibling to Izuna and Madara.

He is however 12, so we're also going to say that the only people who get to make this connection is anyone who's seen the siblings when they were also at a similar age.

On top of that however he has the 'walking amalgamation of all the stereotypes of the main Uchiha house' so anyone who isn't blind will look at him and assume he's somewhere in the sphere of 'important main house person' tho who really knows how distant the relation may be exactly. No one !! That's who !!!

Second; He's the fucking clan heir!! What the fuck!! This bit would have the most impact after all the messy time travel reveals when things have settled down a bit, so it'll sit in the back pocket for a bit. Save it for some fun shaking up later down the line so we don't run out of all the fun reveals too fast and bore the readers, yk?

When it is brought up tho it'd be fun to maybe have some fucky Itachi and Madara mutual understandings of the way things work.

• So. Madara is like a bit of a scary bed time story to Uchiha children, right? Like. "Ooo make sure you don't get too obsessive or fall too deep into your grief and always stay loyal to the village or you'll end up just like Madara!!"

Something something Uchiha-Village relationships are tense as hell, something something Madara fucking over a lot of the clan with his whole. Everything., Something something scapegoat and old stories, something something 'people have probably been talking a lot more about how "god dammit this all started with Madara" in recent years.'

Now with that in mind let's take a look of what our time travelers think of Madara:

Itachi is a good Konoha soldier. Itachi (as has been very much fucking proven) would rather beat a possible problem before it even exists with a hammer till it dies an ugly bloody death than even RISK it blossoming into a proper problem. Itachi does not like Madara. Itachi personally, quietly thinks they should maybe wait till the village is formed then carefully arrange a little accident for him before he goes off the rails. He, even more quietly, maybe even thinks it would be a kindness. Allow him to be remembered well by the village instead of scorned.

Shisui I think is cautiously optimistic about him. He's the kind of guy who gives the benefit of the doubt, who weighs the options, risk and reward, but includes things like hope and compassion in his calculations. Yes, Madara was a uhh. Thing. That happened. But in every story his big blow up always come from one specific event; Izuna's death. So if they stop that from happening, wouldn't it secure both a better future for them and Madara? The history books never went into detail about Izuna, he doesn't know what he's like, but maybe his involvement in the future, on Konoha's side, could lead to even more profits for them long term. At the end of the day he's not against killing Madara (though to be clear, they are at first operating on trying to avoid all interactions with historical events and return home without touching things) but it'd be nice, to manage to get a happy ending for everyone. Unrealistic maybe, but nice.

Mmmm hear me out actually, maybe Shisui, after interacting with him a bit, finds that Madara reminds him of Itachi too. They definatley both have that "I would do unspeakable things to even dream of my loved just one more time" energy, if you know what I mean

Anyways; Kakashi and Tenzo are both neutral on Madara. Yes, they learned about how he betrayed the village when young just like everyone else, but they weren't getting the bed time stories and "do this and you'll end up just like him" warnings like the Uchiha's. They're possibly leaning into negative but are detached from the situation enough to just go "well he hasn't done it yet and his brother is still alive so he won't any time soon" and be done with it

• Now, on the the total opposite side of the spectrum you have Hashirama and Tobirama. People are brought up in Konoha to fucking IDOLIZE these guys. You can not tell me our team of time travelers wouldn't be at least a little awed to speak with them.

I think Tenzo would be the most wide eyed about Hashirama, both for the baseline "holy shit that's the Shodai Hokage" and also that fun juicy mokuton user imposter syndrome he has going on for him. That guys DNA is inside his body!!! Holy shit wait does that mean if someone did a blood relation test with them he might read as being related to him?? Fuck were gonna pocket that for now but like. Mmmmm potential.

I'd say Itachi is the most hesitant about Tobirama but again, village loyalist, so.

You know what tho maybe Shisui is the most hesitant about him (though still largely positive) he both def grew up looking up to him but can also see the anti-Uchiha policies people inact now with the implications that Tobirama would have approved of it. He doesn't know if he would, but like, he has to wonder.

Kakashi is probably the most normal about them (and also has experience in being close to a hokage (Minato) to know that at the end of the day they are painfully human) Don't get me wrong, he's still in some sort of awe! He might get a little lightheaded at the thought of seeing the God of Shinobi in proper battle, or the possibility to see the famed genius of Tobirama with all the different jutsu's he's invented. You can't tell me Kakashi didn't spend a little extra time reading about him when he was trying to make Chidori. Honestly I'm gonna roll with that and say he had a bit of a phase as a kid where he was a total fan boy. Maybe sprinkle in the good old HalfHatake!Tobirama hc to add some faint daydreams a lonley babykashi had after his father's death, about getting to meet him as family. Like cmon, little genius idolizing and projecting on some big history figure only to find out they're actually related? Can you say potential?

Anyways he did eventually grow out of the phase, probably got unattached to it all and lost interest after the whole "losing everything he loved" bit of his life. And at the end of the day, he doesn't have any real complex personal hang ups on the founders like the others do. Thus, most normal.

• And then my favorite most special boy, Izuna !! He's for sure the one they're all most neutral about. He's not actually taught about in the academy? There's probably some throw away line about him in some history books somewhere, but he died young and was quickly buried by the looming shadow of Konoha. The only real knowledge had about him in modern times is just a vague "Yeah he got killed by Tobirama which lead to peace being made but also lead to Madara losing his shit"

Poor Izuna he's the linchpin for it all but was left an unremarkable footnote of history. My boy deserves so much better

Tenzo doesn't actually even know who he is, that boy got bare minimum education under Danzo and Izuna was NOT included.

Itachi and Shisui mmmaybe have some small little fun fact here or there buried in stories from the older members of the clans but like. It's gonna amount to just "yeah he had a great katon" and thats about it.

I WILL SAY HOWEVER. Itachi sees him and instantly is that one PTSD dog meme. Sasuke is a BABY but holy shit Izuna looks exactly like he'd expect him to grow up as and it's making him FEEL THINGS. Also he's so bratty little brother coded !! He's an entire 7 years older than Itachi but Ifachi keeps fucking up and trying to big brother him it's embaressing.

And ofc Itachi didn't go into the first meeting thinking he'd see some weird older mirror version of his beloved baby brother who he misses and worries about very very much. So like. There's for sure going to be some conflict there. If their first meeting is a scuffle (which it probably will be) I think Itachi would keep hesitating to attack. On full run away mode. Which is probably for the best bc he shouldn't try to fight Izuna anyways honey he's like double your bodyweight and you're strong but you aren't THAT strong.

• Pointing back at both the 'Itachi does not like Madara and has quiet thoughts about how it'd possibly be in everyone's interest to just kill him' and the 'Itachi and Madara quietly bond over being clain head/heir during stressful times (w pressure from the elders especially)

I can see 2 outcomes of a potential bonding conversation with them:

1) They come to understand eachother better.

Madara wants to be on good terms, he looks at this kid and sees one of his brothers eyes and the others quiet determination. He can tell Itachi doesn't like him for some reason, and it's frustrating because he doesn't know why. He wants him to like him. He wants to be able to offer his hand and have it taken. It hurts, to be looked at with such suspicion from a face that has traces of Izuna's.

Meanwhile Itachi . . . Itachi looks at Madara and he sees someone who gets it. Gets it like no one ever has. It scares him. He looks up at this man, this horror story he's been told to fear becoming, and he sees himself. And this realization shakes him. It makes him think, makes him wonder. He's so, so sure of his loyalty to Konoha. More sure than he is of anything else in the world. But . . . But if something happened to Sasuke, if he had to choose—

And maybe it softens something in him too, along with the (honestly healthy) dose of fear. It forms a little crack in his shell, just enough to maybe, maybe let Madara through. Just a hair.

Or 2) we pull one of those "The conversation ends with them agreeing verbally but mentally they're on 2 VERY different notes."

Madara, nodding and looking at Itachi meaningfully: "Yeah it can be hard, but all we can really do is try to make the world a safer place for the ones we love. (To create Konoha, to keep my clan safe. Izuna safe. And now to keep you safe too.)

Itachi, nodding slowly: "Yeah. No matter how hard it is (even though I think I understand you more than anyone else Ive ever met) we have to try to make the world a safer place (by killing you in your sleep once Konoha is formed) for the ones we love (My clan. My village. Sasuke.)"

• Also pointing back at the 'Hatake warring clan era reputation,' the 'Tobirama is half Hatake' and also now pointing at Tobirama's title as the White Demon. Small thing but it'd be neat if there was some small throw away line that the nickname lowkey started in part because of the absoloutley terrifying reputation of the Hatake combined with Tobirama's own Everything(tm) like it just had some influence on how some view him. Give me Uchiha's making dog jokes ab him it'll be funny

• Ok but now the actual plot thoughts. Yeah I know I kept you waiting sorry about that.

So time travel! Probably due to a mission gone wrong. Some ruins or some ancient crumbling scroll that wasn't even supposed to do fucking time travel but was so old and corroded that it somehow managed to transform into a whole other seal by pure bad luck. Or good luck I guess, considering it could have just turned into a nuke.

Our favorite team of disasters are very very alarmed !!! What the fuck !!! Obviously they don't default to thinking time travel, but they immediatley know something is wrong. The landscape has changed, though the big landmarks are still there. The mission was complete anyways with no injuries so they just retreat to Konoha. Only oops !! It's not fucking there!!!

Queue alarm.

Shisui is the first one to suggest time travel because he's quirky like that. And there's a very easy way to confirm this theory.

(Also we're going to say that Konoha's location is a valley a few miles out from the Naka River that borders the Senju / Uchiha territories.)

This is convenient because that verification method involves checking in on where Itachi and Shisui know the old Uchiha compound should rest.

They do it in full stealth mode, the second they saw Konoha was missing Kakashi as team leader decided they'd treat the land as enemy territory. They all agreed ofc, for all they knew this WAS enemy territory now.

And, ofc, yeah!! There's the old Uchiha compound!! Being active!!! There are people there!!!

"What are the odds Fugaku-sama decided to have the clan return to their homeland for ahh, cultural enrichment?" Kakashi asked weakly.

"Time travel." Was the only reply he got from Shisui, whispered reverently as the boy vibrated with excitement on the branch.

Itachi just gave him a look, radiating a level of dissaproving disbelief that no normal 12 year old should be able to make. Kakashi would know, he was that not-normal 12 year old once.

From there they decide a no interference policy. Hands off guys!! They probably debate it tho, like, a good amount. They all have ✨️opinions✨️ except maybe Tenzo who's lowkey still in the middle of trying to learn how to be a person and is following Kakashi's lead 99% of the time. Especially since they're still in mission mode and this is like a super serious discussion and he really does know the least ab the founders overall.

They probably debate the merits of going to Uzushiogakure bc seal help but it's really far and they don't actually have like, just any leverage with them. They already decided not to fuck with the future so it isn't like they can trade secrets and warnings. At least if shit happens here they have some plausible deniability, being, yk, 2 uchiha's and a senju-passing guy with Mokuton. Kakashi's kinda fucked tho in that regard but he isn't going to be doing the party ANY favors with his clan heritage.

Which means it's time to potentially get desperate enough to interact with Tobirama !!! Which will inevitably lead to them bumping into a Uchiha patrol or something!!! I don't know honestly

• Anyways want Hashirama and Tenzo to interact. He has so many issues like holy shit. Let Hashirama give him the hug he deserves. I want him to violently adopt him. New brother acquired!!!

I said before but Tenzo is still reprogramming from ROOT. Let Hashirama impact that! Let him help! They can make flower crowns and photosynthesize together idk

Hashirama would be so happy to have another mokuton user, I think they should be able to sense eachother extra strong and like 'ping' off of eachothers chakra, it'll be fun

▪︎ I'm not thinking toooo hard about power scaling and this is fanfiction so a) don't quote me on this and b) for the love of all that is holy don't take my words as gospel

But for this fic specifically I'm ranking the founders and Team Ro, weakest to strongest (in a clean, fair fight head on w no time to prepare) :

Itachi (he's fucking 12 guys. But also he is like. FRACTIONS under Tenzo and Shisui. If he were 13 I'd let him be above or at the same level but like. He's 12. Cmon.)

Tenzo - Shisui (they're like JUST under the next 2 tho like seconds behind)

Izuna - Tobirama

Kakashi ( by the skin of his fucking teeth and the advantage that is his stupid amount of jutsu's and lack of self preservation)

Madara - Hashirama

And again that's not counting like. The specific situations, time given to prepare, potential dirty tricks they could play (I think the Konoha tricks would play a fraction dirtier than the others, who are slightly more used to big open battles vs the ANBU squad who does all sorts of shit in all sorts of places) plus like. Mental state and team ups.

Tenzo or Shisui couldn't take down Izuna or Tobirama but if they teamed up I'd allow it. Kakashi would get his ass kicked by Hashirama or Madara but he could survive a minutes longer than the others would

Itachi is doing his best

But like

He's 12 guys

I love him and he is terrifyingly competent but he won't win 1 on 1 with anyone unless he has some sort of advantage. Minus Shisui and Tenzo who he does have the advantage of regularly fighting, so.

• I think they do get to go back home in the end. It takes a ton of work tho and they probably do need to get Mito's help with it, Kakashi can show them the seal they got brought here with but it's an ACTUAL one in a trillion miracle it didn't fucking atomize them. So it needs a lot of touch ups

Anyways !!!

I have a little more rattling around in my brain but I'm really tired and also starting to think about other things now so I'm gonna stop here. Might come back and add to it later so stay tuned if you're into that

Full disclaimer I'm not gonna write this. I don't have the proper energy and it'd probably end up being too ambitious of a project if I tried. I'd love to see it happen tho, so like !! Big open invitation to absoloutley anyone who might want to take even a fraction of the ideas I've listed.

@ me if you do tho I wanna see the final product

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bulbabutt · 11 months

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ok i wanna talk about tmnt 2007 and the way i think this is the best version of a leo and raph conflict, and also leo as a character

for context i've been talking about tmnt things kinda chronologically, so i'm gonna mention an unconditional understanding in 03 i bring that up in a previous post about that show and the family dynamics in it here if u want context for what i mean

i think this movie can really be appreciated for the place it has between adaptations, and the way character-wise everyone is more or less the same as they've always been but with a more interpersonal relationship as the focus. the main villain of this movie doesn't really matter, the conflict, the fights, that's not where the strength is (although, it is reflected in the conflict and ill get into that)

so tmnt 07 is one movie that kind of combines the 90s movies, 03, and mirage all in one place, and tonally is is similar to the show that will come after it, 12. if the 90s movies give us conflict between leo and raph, and 03 gives us the unconditional understanding between the two, 07 takes these two aspects and creates a story out of it. (debate in your own mind if this movie is a literal sequel to the 90s ones or not, its not that important)

the set up of this movie is we are in a post killing the shredder world. leo has been told by splinter to go get training elsewhere, there isn't much context for what happened to cause this, but i would bet its a similar cause to 03, where he had ptsd and lashed out at his father to which splinter sends him to his grandfather to get better advice than he thinks he can give him. the difference here is there is no grandfather hes sent to, he's sent on a journey of self discovery around the world to learn about it and himself.

the thing about leo as a character, and this goes for all leos, he's has a very black and white way of thinking. leo thinks he's been sent away because he's failing his family, that he's not a good enough leader. so he stays away for longer because he doesn't feel good enough. he finds a place where he can help and he does that. leo always needs a bad guy to fight, or else he's fighting his own demons. so he stays there for a long time. finding a place he can help quietly, never letting anyone see him, and becoming a legend to the locals because no one knows what's really going down.

april manages to track him down and tell him about whats going on with his brothers, how they're holding up without him and without being a team, and i think thats a good reminder for him that they miss him. he doesn't tell april but he finds a way home only after hearing about this. when he arrives and speaks to splinter, he says "i was so caught up in my own world i forgot about everyone else, i'm sorry i failed" he still doesn't feel like he's done anything of worth.

i'm gonna jump in here and say, you know how we all love rise raph? cuz hes the big brother and some traits that come from that are like being overprotective and taking on everyone else's problems and trying to handle emotions alone? well that's a trait thats usually leo's. but the difference with leo is sometimes that concept doesn't make you as likeable. sometimes it means you come off like a nagging mother hen who thinks they know best but in an arrogant way. sometimes it makes you mirror being a parent when no one asked you to be. leo's less of a passionate character than raph, hes more analytical and full of himself. he takes splinters lessons more seriously, and hes always trying to do whats best for everyone so they don't have to worry. this is something evident with 03 and 12, but its so specifically noticeable here because these traits make up the main conflict. i just want to bring that up so we start seeing leo as no different than some of our other favourite iterations.

splinter responds to his apology by saying "you owe me no apology, but perhaps you should talk to raphael, your absence has been particularly difficult for him, though he'll never admit it" but when leo greets him raph is brushing him off.

on raph's end, this is him being angry that leo left, and angry that hes back and everyone wants to pretend that he wasn't gone at all. as if the time he was gone didn't happen. hes lashing out because he too cant handle talking about these emotions. and hes lashing out by becoming a vigilante in his own right.

i see a lot of people misunderstand what raph is doing here, that "this is what the turtles always do" or "this is the same as what leo was doing how could he be mad" when that is not true. that's what casey does. its true that both leo and raph have been fighting bad guys on their own (as a way of dealing with their issues) but raphael has made himself a costume to disguise himself which means hes prepared to be seen. hes riding a motorcycle around, which is loud. this isn't stealthy, this is aggressive. his vigilante name is in the news. the turtles are ninjas, they silently help where they can and fade into the night and, very specifically, they work as a team. these turtles live in a dangerous world, what if something happened to him while no one else was around? they would never know because he never told anyone.

so raph is lashing out, and leo doesn't have a good way of dealing with it. he tries to slide back into being leader, doing what splinter says but he forgets how his brothers are, and with raph egging them on they get into fights they shouldn't. which leo specifically gets in trouble for, as the oldest brother, and as their leader. leo tries to be this better leader hes supposed to have learned to be, but it doesn't work and raph ends up back out there in his vigilante get up. leo tracks down said vigilante, and in his peak "leo knows best" moment, lectures him, not knowing its his brother. there's a scuffle, and the mask comes off. let me point out that casey knew this vigilante was raph but his own brother didn't, because leo has been gone that long.

so lets get into what this fight is really about. on the surface, its "wow you've been going out at night alone putting yourself in dangerous situations with no backup" and "so what you're just mad that i can do it without you" which leo would be right about. and this is the analytical leo, he really thinks that's all that's going on here. what hes missing is that raphael has missed him as a brother, and hes hurt that leonardo left and just came back no big deal. that he wants everything to be normal. raphael is always a character with big emotions and the only outlet he knows to express them is violence.

leo, who as we've established, went away to learn to be better for his family is angry that raph doesn't see that. he's mad raph doesn't appreciate the effort he went to, and he thinks he's just angry because he's not in charge. each brother sees the other as being arrogant.

this leads them to the big fight. no one can disagree that this is the best part of the movie (seriously watch the movie for this scene if you haven't seen it before) , but the real best part of it is that raphael wins. raph proves hes just as capable of a fighter as his brother, if not more-so. he uses those sais as they're supposed to be used, catching leo's swords and in a fit of rage he fucking breaks them, leaving leo defenceless and completely vulnerable to attack. you'd think he'd be smug that leo lost but he pauses, going through a lot of emotions in a moment, questioning what he's doing, why hes doing it. and leo finally looks his brother in the eye and sees raph going through something he didn't before, realizing raph hasn't been angry that he's back, but that he's angry that he ever left. they don't have a conversation, because raph cant handle all these emotions and he runs away, crying as he does. leo just watches him, taking it all in and realizing the error of his ways.

hearing leo scream turns raph around, but he's too late to help him, and this is where raph regrets his own actions because right then, leo is also proven right in his argument. because he gets kidnapped. if leo hadn't chased raph down, there is a very good chance that would have been raph being kidnapped. with no backup, with no one knowing what happened to him. that's why its important that the turtles are a team.

raph goes home full of guilt, and there's a good moment of showing how he cannot open up emotionally here, because he grunts, punches the wall, knocks over some weights and forces splinter to ask him what happened, because that's how raphael is. he laments to his father that he finally understands why leo is the better son, proving that to raph none of this was about their team, but about their family. conflating the two ideas in his head. splinter gives him a talk that mirrors what he said to leo when he returned earlier in the movie, encouraging him that he is a good son and brother. this shows that these brothers have very similar insecurities about their value to their family.

the rest of the movie plays out as you expect, they go save leo, they stop the bad guy, they reconcile and behave as the team they're supposed to be. but i just want to point out that the villains plot is mirrored in leo and raph's conflict. the 'villain' here is a brother who has been cursed to be immortal without his own siblings. for 3000 years he lived to regret his actions and decided to undo his curse, but he used the cursed stone versions of his siblings to do so. no communication, just thinking he knew better (which maybe he did) and lying about it. that caused them to lie to him right back, and try to overthrow him and destroy the world. this is just one family whose inner turmoil could have destroyed the world. you might say, oh that's not a very interesting turtles villain, but its not supposed to be. its not the focus.

this movie is all about the complicated relationship between a family, and i see so many people talk about it by trying to ask who's right and who's wrong. that's not how it works. life is more complicated than that, people are more complicated than that. its boring to look at this movie and just say "leo is wrong and raph is right" because that's not even how the characters see it. this movie is about leo and raph being mirrors of each other in their arrogance, in their insecurities, and in their stubborn pig-headed refusal to let the other know how they feel. splinter says as much at the start of the movie. this whole movie shows that without each other, they need to be fighting something so they don't get swept up by their own emotions, which they are both bad at processing. they are SUCH brothers. they are so similar emotionally, yet they have such a hard time understanding each other.

personally 07 leo is my favourite leo for his complexity, his flaws his strength, his growth. its sad we never got those sequel movies to get into the other brothers heads as much as we got into leo and raphs heads.

also nolan north and james arnold taylor gave the best vocal performances in this movie and they deserve all the credit for it.

#tmnt #tmnt 2007 #tmnt 07 #teenage mutant ninja turtles #07 leo #i will defend 07 leo to death does no one understand his autistic swag like i do #all leos are like this he just got to shine cuz the movie was ABOUT his and raphs issues #this has been in the drafts for a while and in the mind a LOT longer than that #sorry its long idek if thats all i have to say about him but CLEARLY its long enough #thoughts

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kermitthesog · 6 months

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All the series combined, (pjo, hoo, toa) I think Trials of Apollo might be my favorite. I’ve said Heroes of Olympus for a while, but after finishing toa, I was actually really sad in a way that I wasn’t with the other series. This is my reasoning: *TOA SPOILERS AHEAD*

Lester/Apollo’s narration and character development was top notch. In The Hidden Oracle, at first I thought the book series was gonna be full of arrogance and whining. Oh, how it was the complete opposite. He went through stuff that no other god will ever go through. Pain, and grief. The empty feeling of not being yourself anymore. And he finally realized how the gods are, how clueless they have been about mortals and demigods. Everything that happened in toa was just building up to the perfect Apollo, the Apollo that’s not in fact perfect.

The characters. Like, these characters are so good? First of all, they are so fleshed out. Meg McCaffrey, who saw her own father dead and got mentally abused by the emperor who killed him. “The Beast,” was just himself, but Meg was too scared of him to stand up for herself. And like, how is an arrow kind of making me empathize with it? The arrow of Dodona was supposedly the worst piece of wood in the forest, and so Lester needed to prove the others wrong, and I think he did. Especially in that final battle against Python.

The amount of different stories and adventures. Obviously you would have sooo many adventures, because you need to get a different oracle in each one! In every single one, we’re introduced to a new character and new goal. It doesn’t really start in the first one, as it’s just introducing the main characters. In the second one, it’s Emmie, Jo, Calypso, and Leo. In the third one, it’s Piper, Jason, and Grover. In the fourth one, it’s Lavinia, Reyna, Hazel, and Frank (a lot of characters from SoN). In the last one, it’s just a lot of chb campers. Will, Nico, the Troglodytes, and more. See what I mean? There are so many different stories in just one series.

And lastly, how powerful it is. The fact that it could make me cry is impressive, because I don’t cry at much (book and movie wise). Jason’s death, Lester’s misery, Meg’s abuse, and so much more. It’s just so sad but powerful at the same time. If you prefer a different series, (PJO, HOO, TOA) then tell me why!

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zoe-oneesama · 1 year

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Saw your post about Andre

What do u think about Zoe, then?

As a character, she's not bringing anything worth getting excited about. Personality wise, she's just Marinette-Pre-Origins: sweet and eager for friends, but ultimately letting her fear of Chloe rule her behavior until someone else reaches out, and now she suddenly has a spine. And I'm all for the idea of Marinette taking the lessons she learned in Origins about standing up for herself and not sitting by and letting injustices happen, and then turning around and inspiring someone else to do the same, so on paper, Marinette being that person for Zoe would be sweet and make sense. Except we have a full class of kids that she could've and should've already been that inspiration for, so this feel very Too Little Too Late.

And the few things they did to try and make Zoe unique didn't have enough thought or effort put into them so they fall flat.

So she got bullied out of her old school because she "was playing a part; being someone else" and when she dropped the act, "everyone turned against me". Um, yeah, if I found out my friend who'd I'd been confiding in and getting close to lied and faked their entire personality, I wouldn't want to be friends with them anymore either. I wouldn't go so far as to put cockroaches in their locker, but I can't blame Zoe's old "friends" for feeling betrayed.

(And let's be real, the writers definitely HAD to throw in the cockroaches thing so that Zoe actually had examples of being bullied instead of "no one wanted to be my friend anymore when they found out I was a totally different person")

So she's an actress, putting on different faces to please the people around her (clearly, she learned nothing from her previous experience - it's reasonable that people didn't like you because you lied, not because they didn't like who you really are). But then they didn't even keep up this 'acting' thing for more than one episode! Sure, she dusts it off in "Gabriel Agreste", but that entire aspect of Zoe's story is resolved as soon as it's introduced.

(Though it's obvious that the show is trying to convince you that her old friends DID turn on her JUST because they didn't like her as a goody-two shoes nice girl).

With Zoe putting on a fake persona, there could've been intrigue over the episode, or even the season, about who Zoe really is. Like, Marinette is SURE that Zoe is faking being like Chloe, but she has no way to know Zoe wasn't faking being nice to her when they first met. Why not show Zoe putting on different personas than just those two? Have Zoe interact with Juleka by being low energy and stand offish, then swapping to bubbly and energetic around Rose? Have Marinette be confused and that becomes part of the Mystery of Zoe?

And how about that contrivance, that Marinette met "nice" Zoe first and so is SOOOOO sure that Zoe is faking being "mean"? And because Marinette declares this To Be So, all of her friends just believe Marinette and are willing to give Zoe a chance. (despite not believing her about other things *cough* Lila *cough*) This is the same Marinette who's canonically declared her hatred of "liars" more than once, so even if Zoe is only "pretending" to be mean, why is Marinette giving her a pass? I'll tell you why - because we need to seamlessly integrate Zoe into the main friend group so we can speed run her taking over as the new Bee.

Because that's the main problem with Zoe - it's so blatantly obvious what the writers are trying to get out of her, because they don't even TRY to hide it. Don't get it twisted, I don't care that Zoe is brought in to replace Queen Bee, Queen Bee deserves to be replaced. I care how Zoe was brought in to replace Queen Bee. If the writers had taken enough time and care to ACTUALLY seamlessly integrate Zoe, instead of just shoving her in and bending the characters to accept her with no hesitation, then Zoe wouldn't come across as such a Mary Sue-Diet Marinette.

We already have a pretty full cast, so making the audience care about this new character that they've neither hinted at or bothered to build up to in Season 4 was already a big ask. Which is why I believe they should've stretched her "faking personas" story over several episodes. Have Marinette be as wary about Zoe as she was about Lila, esPECIALLY since she's Chloe's sister, but then have Zoe showcase her range of "personas" to throw Marinette off guard. Then you can have scenes of Zoe's mask slipping, like small acts of heroism where there's no time to think: pulling someone out of the way of an akuma attack, distracting the akuma if it gets too close to Ladybug, or even using her acting to help someone else get out of trouble despite Zoe getting nothing in return. Show the REAL Zoe through her actions DESPITE her acting, which then justifies Marinette being sure that "mean" Zoe isn't the real one.

Could've even had Chloe notice that Zoe's slipping and isn't acting very much "like a Bourgeois" and make it CHLOE who digs up that Zoe was bullied, make it CHLOE who airs out all the things that were done to Zoe. I mean, who better to call out a poser than Chloe? Especially since the rest of the class would more willing to take Zoe's side against Chloe (you would think) and it helps with the whole Zoe vs Chloe thing with the Bee Miraculous. Plus, having that information aired out when Zoe didn't want it to could've been a better reason to be akumatized than just "I'm giving in to playing the role I was already determined to play and putting my shoes in this hole with my dreams." Just saying.

But they didn't want to take the time. They didn't want to try. They didn't want to put in the effort to make Zoe someone to care about, both for the audience and for the characters. They shoved her in, gave her an exposition dump, and suddenly everyone was totally cool with her, No Questions Asked. In fairness, they didn't actually have Zoe be mean to anyone other than Marinette One Time in front of Chloe, so there wasn't much to overcome. But that's just another check in the "wow, you didn't even try" column.

I can't bring myself to care about Zoe because she's just a tool. She was brought in with the sole purpose of putting in nearly no effort to become friends with everyone and use the Bee Miraculous, as quickly as possible and as effortlessly as possible. Never mind that such a thing probably should have been earned. I just hate it when I can see the writer's intentions so blatantly.

But I get it, the Bee Miraculous is seriously OP and it'd be a shame not to use it just because Queen Bee was benched. Too bad Ladybug can't just merge Miraculouses and use it hersel- ohhhh, wait.

#it doesn't escape my notice that Vesperia seems to have more screen time than Zoe just saying #she's a tool she's a vessel so they can just use 'Venom' without having to bring in Queen Bee #WHO SHOULDN'T BE BROUGHT IN SO I'M NOT MAD ABOUT THAT PART #it's just like...try? Could they have tried?#Also it could've been a good way to confront Marinette's hatred of 'liars' to have Zoe pull off the 'Lila' thing #but doing so in order to protect herself instead of to gain favors and praise #zoe salt #writing salt #ml salt #my opinion #an essay by zoe

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wowa-bublord · 2 months

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Bubby!!! You know me, I'm gonna ask about Sephiroth

Where is Seph in your au? Is he still crazy about Cloud? Is he crazy about Zack and Cloud? Or Zack living just negated everything and now he is not crazy at all and he like... opens a bakery or something

I need to know 🥺

NUBE!!!! HI!!!! THIS IS SOMETHING IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT. but i haven't decided yet.... on one hand, i love sephiroth and i want him to be happyyyyehfghdsj 😭 on the other hand, Sephiroth is obviously an important part of the story and taking him out as a villain would cause a big affect on it

I'm gonna use this ask as a drawing board here to write down some ideas. My first thought is that Zack could be the one with the sephiroth pilled brain. and there are two main ways i see him reacting to it. With #1 being the ignorer. He doesn't tell anyone and keeps it to himself, knowing how badly cloud and tifa were affected and feeling like the way hearing about what he's experiencing would affect them much worse than him dealing with it himself

And Idea two: Sephiroth would work as an in-universe representation of Zacks guilt over Angeal, genesis, and Sephiroth. His presence in visions would be not just a real thing happening, but story-wise it'd be able to help show visually how much Zack is struggling under the weight of his trauma

Redeeming Sephiroth could be an interesting arc, but this is post nibelheim, and he's sort of under Jenovas grip right now, already having abandoned most of himself into the lifestream. Is there anything left to be redeemed? And also...

its probably not a task to be done with tifa and clouds involvement.

we could go with the og story and have him haunting Cloud. who is also a chronic ignorer

Really the route this au goes depends on how much I change from the og story from this point onward.. to be honest I've only figured out zack and clouds recovery, I'm still shuffling through the main story events, though I'm thinking I'm gonna rewatch a gameplay on rebirth part 1 and take notes on what I think would change if zack was there (in place of cloud at some parts)

maybe sephiroth brings all of himself back from the lifestream and opens a bakery far away from everyone else and works through his issues and his guilt away from the cast... but that'd be hard to show in my aus story.

#my art #zack lives au #IF YOU GUYS HAVE ANY IDEAS FOR WHERE THE STORY SHOULD GO PLEEEASE SEND THEM IN. HELP ME SAVE ME.#zack fair ffvii #tifa lockhard ffvii #cloud strife ffvii #sephiroth ffvii #i looveee drawing sephiroth omg he's my silly billy #i have that other au of genesis trying to save sephiroth so maybe these happen in the same universe

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meibywabie · 2 months

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Xie Lian isn’t a hero.

I started with TGCF first when I was introduced to danmei, and I was floored by what I read. It wasn’t just boys kissing in ancient china, it was actually about human tragedy and the selfishness of the omnipotent.

The theme of TGCF doesn’t revolve around XL alone. It’s much bigger than that. This isn’t a ‘TGCF is better’ post, but rather, TGCF is different. And it’s different because Xie Lian isn’t a typical human hero.

XL is not a heroic character like WWX, and he isn’t a sarcastic/comedic relief hero like SQQ. And it isn’t because of their personalities. XL is just as selfless as WWX and just as unreasonably punished as both other MC’s. However, when bad things happen to WWX, you know it’s because of his personality. Because of his kindness, his confidence, his wit. It’s simply BECAUSE it’s WWX as the protagonist.

Same with SVSSS. That story couldn’t have happened without Shen Yuan in SQQ’s body. Like we never would have gotten that level of sarcasm, pity, and empathy. And the novel tells you that repeatedly. Everything that happens in the previous two novels does so because of who the main character is.

But when things happen in TGCF, XL isn’t even the center of the conflict. It’s almost always someone else’s fault, someone else’s business, or someone else’s issue he just happens to be present for. But somehow, it always comes back to him. It’s always his job to resolve things.

Unlike WWX, the conflict isn’t his fault. WWX actively pushes the narrative with his actions. He drives the conflict and later becomes it. Whether he’s at fault or not is the point of his story, but for XL, he’s really just incredibly unlucky. He’s tragic in the sense that he’s just being fucked over by everyone in his life. For what? For being…wonderful!?

I absolutely love that his one little phrase pissed off the evil emperor of heaven. Like his mere existence is a problem.

It’s an incredible piece of writing that the things that get him into trouble are his altruism. Altruism that is fitting for someone who thinks himself a GOD. But also, altruism that many of us mortals share.

Why CANT he save his people if he’s a god? Why CANT he answer everyone’s prayers? Why is he not good enough or strong enough to resolve this conflict if he’s literally a GOD.

XL is constantly facing issues and asking questions that humanity itself has asked.

Why isn’t god answering me, why isn’t god helping me, why do we have a god at all? TGCF has a commentary that doesn’t limit itself to just XL and the type of person he is in the way that MDZS relies on WWX and SVSSS relies on SQQ.

Those novels are how most novels typically function. You choose a specific type of human and see the world through their eyes.

But XL isn’t human. Not in the way he acts nor in the way he tells this story. He tells you everything he witnesses and it barely affects him anymore. He just has some wise thoughts about what everything means.

But TGCF isn’t asking: what would happen if a kind prince ascended to godhood?

Instead—

TGCF begs the question:

What if you told the story of humanity, not through the eyes of a human, but through the eyes of god.

Xie Lian is god.

XL is 800yrs old, has lived through countless tragedies, celebrations, friendships, betrayals, and he ascends. Again.

He’s been stuck with the burden of immortality and now he’s re entering the place that gave him that burden. He walks into heaven to see new gods, but the same old problems. And the whole vibe he has in this is less benevolent and wonderful and more like a fed up mom who’s tired of seeing the girls fighting.

He sits back and watches these issues devolve and shuffles his way into the conflict by accident. Because he’s the only one competent enough to do anything about it.

XL doesnt react like a human being, at the start of the current timeline, he’s a god.

He’s an 800yr old god. He’s seen everything, learned everything.

We see this prince who thinks himself a god then become one. And instead of learning what it means to be a god so he can help the common man— he learns what it means to be a common man so he can become a real god.

XL goes through HELL. He loses countless times, is left, betrayed, ruined, trampled, destroyed. He is constantly being thwarted by not just people but the very gods he worshipped and the god he himself became. But again— XL isn’t even that big of a personality for us to cling to that alone and see how these things happened to him??

He isn’t boasting about how great he is out of pride and ego, he isn’t rampaging or going mad with power, he isn’t a huge character. But his lack of those qualities is what triggers Jun Wu to ruin him. He wants to see him go crazy, wants to see him struggle. Wants to see his ego and pride. And he’s not the only one!!!

Mu Qing is also incredibly jealous, so are the other gods!!! And Qi Rong, his own family!!! His parents even get upset with him for not doing enough. Everyone saw this kid blessed with so much and started wishing for him to break. And they succeed. He goes insane, he starts killing, he starts wanting to die, he starts losing faith.

But MAN it is just so gorgeous to me that this character is almost…forced to be a main character? Forced to suffer, forced to make mistakes, forced to be a problem. He is so powerful and smart and incredible and then he is made to believe he is nothing. Here is this god who has been forced to feel HUMAN.

And once he finally feels that way, once he finally falls to the ground and loses everything, someone comes by and offers his hat.

And that’s all it takes for a man to truly become a god.

TGCF asks what if you told a story through the eyes of god? It shows you this guy sighing through drama and fixing peoples problems.

And then it goes back and tells you: What makes a man, god?

And we read all of XL’s history. His victories and failures. And it perfectly describes how he’s ascended again. Not out of heroics this time. But out of his pure humanity.

God is a kind, gentle, but confident man who wanders around helping who he can and opening his doors to those who wish to come in. He resolves the conflicts he’s there for, and takes note of those he wasn’t there for. He trudges along holding no grudges and sighing when people make mistakes. He loves selflessly and holds no judgment. He feels strange letting people take care of him but he will take care of you. When he can, and when he has the chance, he will take care of you.

XL is almost born with every book definition of what a god is: kind, selfless, strong, and true. But his story forces him to learn how to be human instead. To fail, die, love, kill and suffer. And when that god was beaten and broken, he was saved by one thing. A human.

That’s how you become a god. And that’s what it means to be one. To be human. To be a good person.

XL couldn’t have been a WWX. He couldn’t have been a staple protagonist with a heart of gold, wit and passion. He couldn’t have had a story with everyone’s conflict directly tied to him and because of him. That isn’t what TGCF is for.

It isn’t about XL himself. It’s about god. It explores the selfishness that comes with immortality, and the selflessness that comes with mortality.

There are other aspects that make it a nice protag story. He falls in love, he’s kinda air headed and sassy. He did have the character and maturity to choose to become a wonderful godlike person but that’s a post for another day. But honestly, if this were a regular novel, it probably would’ve been about Hua Cheng. He lives for love and passion and devotion. He kills and saves and sacrifices, he denies godhood and wins the girl in the end. Now THATS a hero.

But XL isn’t a hero. He’s a god.

MXTX wrote a story that wasn’t about a sheepish prince who lost it all, but instead wrote a story about gods and humans. She wrote what reads like a Greek epic to me. With such hard comments on morality and cruelty. She really hit me with everything I love about literature. And yes I do love MDZS and SVSS but TGCF is different.

Like guoshi said: the gods are human, after all. But XL above them all, is most definitely a god.

#im honestly pretty sure if Jun Wu hadn’t ruined XL’s life he woudlve become like LQQ and been a little stupid LMAO #Jun Wu could never #TGCF #heaven official's blessing #heaven officials blessing #hob #hualian #xie lian

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syruubi · 3 months

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Man its been weeks and I’m still soured by the conclusion to Fontaine’s main story. I'll just rant here

There were a lot of things I didn’t like about it (Arlecchino's altruism being played straight, Traveler being out of character, the lore exposition ass-pull with the prophecy slates, the weird logic about how destroying a Gnosis could potentially wake up the Heavenly Principles but not fucking destroying an Archon Throne when Celestia forced everyone to fight a GODDAMN WAR TO ESTABLISH THEM-) but the biggest offense to me was how Furina was handled. This was marketed as the grand finale of the arc, the climax with Furina at the center of it all. And she got shafted. Big time. Furina had no agency in the plot whatsoever, nothing she did had any effect on how things turned out, and she didn’t even have the dignity of fully understanding why it all had to happen that way.

(Also I will preface this with yes Furina and Focalors are technically the same person with the same origin, but after the split Furina lost all her memories as Focalors. They are two separate consciousnesses with different experiences, and therefore I will treat their individual choices as their own)

I’ve seen people try to argue that no, she chose to take on this role knowing she would suffer, that she didn't HAVE to go along with it. And she was even working by herself to solve the prophecy without relying on Focalors, she wasn’t a puppet/pawn! But the thing is she was essentially in a hostage situation. If she didn’t do things exactly as dictated by Focalors people would DIE. Like there is a reason why criminal punishments are lighter when it’s found the perpetrator was coerced into it! And her researching how to avoid the prophecy changed nothing about the outcome, she could have sat around eating cake and the story would have word for word turned out exactly the same. All that information served to do was highlight her suffering and draw the audience’s sympathy. That's what I mean about her not having agency, it's not about her ability to act as an individual but how her actions had an effect on the overall plot. None of her choices outside of the role designated by Focalors did anything to change the situation for better or worse.

And to top it all off she didn’t even understand WHY this all had to happen. Why do people dissolve in the Primordial water? How does her pretending to be an Archon play into solving the issue? Why can’t she confide in anyone? What the hell is Focalors even doing? She doesn’t learn the answers to any of these until after everything was over, and not even from Focalors’ own mouth, it was relayed to her by Neuvillette.

Speaking of Neuvillette, I’m not gonna lie I’m sorta annoyed at his existence because it felt like Furina was shafted for him. Everything is very tilted in Neuvillette's favor. He gets his powers back, full control over Pneuma/Ousia, final say in trials, the ability to hand out Visions, and just straight up the ability to manipulate life itself. And okay all these things were his to begin with lore-wise, whatever, but he also becomes the "lore important" character after this at Furina's expense. Furina doesn't have her memories as Focalors, she can't tell us anything about how the world works, about Celestia, about what happened 500 years ago. Even though other Archons didn't give us much either for one reason or another, they at least HAVE that knowledge, and are therefore guaranteed to have involvement in future events with the Abyss and Celestia. Furina at the moment, doesn't. Neuvillette has it now. And all that talk about Focalors judging Celestia? Also Neuvillette's job now. And it feels like it was all stolen from Furina from a story-telling perspective because again, she didn't know of the plan to return his powers. She didn't even get to explicitly agree with her other self that he should have them back. The writers really seemed to go out of their way to place him on a pedestal at Furina's expense, which irks the hell out of me.

There are some opportunity for future interludes to turn the current state around, and they probably will since Furina is still being marketed as an Archon, but as it stands I want Fontaine to be over so we can move on to the next disappointment.

#I'm actually ok with the trial #I thought it was dumb but from the characters perspectives Furina was willingly hiding key information #and they already gave her a chance to come clean with it privately #so they had to corner her #and the writers needed to build up to the climax #so even if it was contrived I give it a pass #It was undoubtedly dramatic and I was very moved by Focalors sacrifice #but I couldn't disagree more when people call it peak writing #maybe it depends greatly on whether you liked Furina before her past was revealed #Bc despite the implications that there was more to her even early on people looked at her act at face value and thought she was insufferabl #and it was after we were shown the extent of her suffering that opinions took a 180 #and while I'm glad for that I can't help but be a little bitter that it took THIS for it to happen #amy rambles

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starry-eyes-love · 4 months

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Ch 8- A Christmas Story

Main Masterlist Series Masterlist

My Journey to You Series: Ch. 8- A Christmas Story (can read as a stand alone or in order with the series).

Pairings | Joel Miller x F!Reader with a lot of Ellie interactions

Summary | A Christmas Story in January, three wishes granted, and finally the concept of a family once again…and F!Reader and Joel’s teasing hit an all time high between them.

Warnings | 18+, Minors DNI. Language, slight angst (Joel and reader overthinks stuff again), sexual tension/teasing to the max, panic attack (Joel has one), a ton of fluffy fluff fluff stuff (like a ton), a lot of funny/cute little moments, references to smut (without actual smut though), passionate kissing, terms of endearment (baby, honey, etc.), Ellie calls Joel dad (it needs its own warning), Joel hears Sarah’s voice, Christmas theme stuff, water and snowball fight, Ellie and Joel banter, implied age gap (without any reference to age), Christmas cookies, family and marriage dynamic references, and I don’t want to spoil too much more. This one is a tear jerker (funny laughter and fluffy stuff wise) but in the best possible way for them. And a ring may be involved (shhh). Ok, not going to spoil it anymore…just read it…oh and an old guy in a fat Santa suit :)

Word Count: 10.9 K (not sorry really)

Ellie immediately started laughing as Joel struggled with the Santa suit. “Joel, you look funny in a fat suit,” she said, laughing out loud at a pillow peeking through his Santa jacket. “I haven't heard of no Joel before, I'm Santa.” He said, with a husky voice. “So what happened to Joel? Did ya kill him when you landed your fat ass on top of him with your sleigh…”

Joel had hunted for the perfect Christmas tree. He tried to find one that wasn’t too big or too small, something that would easily fit inside the cabin. After searching for the better part of a day, Joel finally found one that was perfect. You had been sitting by the fire, relaxing after making jerky for food, when you heard Joel through the door say “Hey, can ya help me with this?”

When you opened your eyes and peered through the window you gasped at seeing the tree. “Joel, are you serious? Did you actually get us a Christmas tree?” you said, eyes bright and a huge smile plastered on your face. It had been ages since you had a Christmas tree, let alone a proper Christmas. Christmas was always your favorite holiday and you were absolutely blown away that Joel was making the effort to give you something from your childhood, even though it was long past the holiday season.

After the tree was up, Ellie and you searched the storage totes again and found some old Christmas decorations with lights. There were only a few ornaments in the storage containers, so you improvised. You hung a few spoons, a hunting knife that was broken, a few old holey socks, and a few pieces of paper that had fallen out from old books; all of which were placed on the tree like ornaments. It wasn't the best looking tree, but it meant something to the three of you. It showed that even with survival, there was still a chance of having a family once again.

The following days after you put up the tree you kept to yourself more, getting lost in your own thoughts of the past again. You thought about what time of the year it was, and by your calculations and best estimate, you figured it was sometime in the middle of January. Technically Christmas was in the past, being a December holiday. When you brought this fact up to Joel, he told you to stop worrying. That the whole point of any of this was to give Ellie a taste of Christmas, no matter what time of year or suggested date it was on the calendar. No one kept a calendar anymore, all any of you could do was guess.

You tried not to worry, but you started overthinking again. You didn't tell anyone, but you silently hoped that Christmas would bring you a family once again. You knew Joel hadn't said that he loved you yet, but you were hoping he'd say it now for Christmas. What you didn't know was that Joel had been saying that he loved you, but just in Spanish, and you didn’t speak Spanish. Joel said ‘te amo’ almost every day to you, which meant that he loved you. He said it in front of Ellie once, and you saw Ellie's eyes go wide. Joel shot her a quick glare to be quiet. When you had asked her why she reacted that way, and if she understood Spanish, she said no. You didn't voice it, but you knew that she was lying. You tried asking Joel again what ‘te amo meant’, but he never answered you. He just walked outside and pretended not to hear you. You were starting to think that maybe your idea of Joel telling you that he loved you was wrong, that actually he was being mean to you once again, but this time in Spanish. You were so lost and confused, overthinking things once again in your head.

In the following days when you heard that the traps needed to be checked and reset, you volunteered to do it. This allowed you to mull things over in your head, without interruption or having to explain why you were being more quiet and keeping to yourself. You were gone for the better part of a day, taking longer than normal to check and reset the traps. You were so lost in thought, bent over and working on the last trap that you never heard Joel approach.

“Ya know, I didn't think watchin’ you attempt to check and rest a trap for the last 20 minutes would be so sexy. But I guess I was wrong.” He said, leaning up against a tree with his arms crossed.

You slowly straightened up and glanced over your shoulder, raising an eyebrow up at him. You didn't want to argue or fight, so you were wary of saying anything. When you looked at Joel, frustration was not what you saw. You saw him look at you like he was a wolf, and that you were his prey. His eyes were dark and pupils blown wide with lust. When you trailed your eyes down his body, you saw a tight prominent bulge in the front. The longer you looked, the more you felt your own heat rise up in your spine, and a deep throb started someplace else inside of you. How can that man stand there and look that damn sexy, you thought to yourself.

Joel stared at you, wondering the same thing. Damn woman. You're making it so fucking hard f’me. I just wanna bend ya over right there and fuck that nice tight lil’ ass of yours. Joel's thoughts were running rampant in his head, he was fighting hard to keep his calm composure and not give in to his animal instincts. After a moment of eye fucking you he said in a husky voice, “Ya wanna bend over for me, nice and slow baby? Let me see that nice tight ass of yours?”

“Yeah, well Miller, you can't touch now can you?” You said, smiling at Joel, trying to push the beast in front of you to give in and devour you. You craved Joel in every possible way. And by the way he was glaring at you, you figured he was thinking the same thing that you were. You wanted him desperately to stop being so noble, to just give in to his animal urges and claim you completely as his.

With a slight smirk and another slow palm to his crotch Joel said, “well baby, that's why I'm asking ya to bend back over f’me. I wanna see that nice, big-”

“You better not be referring to my ass as being big there old man, or so help me God, that'll be the last time you see it in this position.” You glared at Joel, silently challenging him to continue.

You saw Joel swallow hard, his Adam's Apple bobbing up and down at your statement. Apparently your mouth turned him on. God, why did your smartass attitude sound so incredibly sexy to him right now? You watched Joel place his hands on his hips, slowly taking a few steadying breaths. It was getting harder and harder for him to deny you. This little chase game between the two of you was heating up, and Joel was miserable. You've been teasing the fuck out of him for days, not kissing him or allowing him to touch you sexually. He was about two seconds away from saying screw it and give in to you. He wanted you, desperately. Evidence of this was inside his pants right now, straining hard against his zipper. Throbbing and pulsing to every fast beat of his heart, reminding him that even in this unforgiving world, that he was still a man that had needs. And his needs were screaming at him to bend you over and claim that perfect little cunt of yours as his. God man, get a fucking grip on yourself.

Joel scolded himself internally, he remembered the discussion the two of you have had recently regarding the act of penetration. “Joel, do I not turn you on, do you not want sex? Every time I try, you say no. I want to. Please.” Your thoughts and mouth had overflowed with doubt and anxiety at his relationship with you recently. It wasn't like he didn't want to have sex, God he wanted nothing more than to give in and give you everything. But he was trying to do this right, or so he thought. “Just a little while longer,” he had said to you. But the more he watched you right now, the more he started to question his own logic.

Joel, being so lost in thought, was surprised when you slowly bent over and ran your hand up the back of your ass. “Mr. Miller, I want you to fuck this so bad.” You had said, looking back at him, pleading with your eyes.

Joel was trying to be a good man for you, a true gentleman. But you almost made him cum right there on the spot with that move. Right now he wanted to throw all caution out of the way and just bury himself deep inside of you, claim you as truly his. With a low growl, and a firm palm to his crotch, Joel looked at you with warning eyes and said, “Darlin', ya can't say shit like that t’me and expect me not to-” Joel had to stop himself before he fully admitted to his weakness. He knew that if he told you that he wanted to fuck you, that you'd touch him. And the moment you'd touch him would be when his last resolve would snap, and he'd give in to you with no restraint.

When you looked back at Joel, he looked completely wrecked. That man is truly like iron steel with his resolve. Holding back and not giving in, you thought. For a moment you truly were impressed with his ability to say no. But as the intense stare down continued, you knew he was on the verge of breaking and giving you what you wanted. But by how black his pupils looked, you knew he wouldn’t be able to be gentle, and that terrified and excited you all at the same time. You wanted him to give you everything that he had, to not hold back anymore, and to just let himself feel something. “Ya alright?” you said, while walking over to Joel. When he didn't respond, you were concerned. So with a long exhale you said, “Look Joel, I'm sorry, I-”

“No ya ain't. Ya ain't fucking sorry and you know it. Fuck woman, ya need to stop teasing me like this.” He said, pointing down at the front of him. You could see that he was uncomfortable, pants visibly tight around his big length. He was slightly throbbing through his denim jeans as his belt fit nice and snug on his waist. His lips were slightly parted as he slowly licked them, getting them nice and moist. He ran a hand through his hair, breathing heavy, cock twitching at your staring eyes. You heard a low growl emit from his chest as he said with a stern voice “quit fucking staring at me like that, and stop your god damn teasing, now.”

When you slowly raised your eyes up to Joel’s face, you saw the wild man, the wolf within him, stare back at you. Joel had that look in his eyes of pure dominance. He wanted you to challenge him, so he could claim you as truly his. Every warning bell was going off in your head from him, and you did the only thing that you knew you could do in this situation. You pushed him a little more, wanting his resolve to snap hard. “Teasing you? I'm not teasing you Joel.” You said, allowing irritation to lace your voice. Here you were minding your own business, thinking about stuff when he told you that you looked sexy and to bend over, and now giving you fuck me eyes. What the fuck was his problem, he was teasing you, you thought.

Joel didn't say anything, but he continued to look at you breathing hard. He knew you were challenging him, hoping that he’d lash out and teach you a lesson. You two had a lot of sexual tension building up over the past few months. And honestly, you two needed to fuck it out, but here was not the proper time nor place to do it. So he gently shook his head no, and took three steps back from you, dropping his hands to his sides while whispering “baby, we can’t.”

You knew that Joel was backing down, retreating from his feelings once again. And this made you frustrated. This was the whole reason why you were out here in the first place. You needed some time to be away from the tension inside the house, from the constant reminder that Joel didn’t want you sexually the way that you wanted him. So when you turned back around to go back to the trap, you were surprised to feel Joel grab your arm. Confusion laced your face when you looked down at his contact with you. His voice, almost in a pained whisper said, “baby please, just wait a sec. Maybe we could, I- uh want to, I want- shit.” He said, shaking his head.

“Joel, what is it?” You were hoping that if he couldn’t do the act that he obviously wanted to do, that maybe he could just at least talk about it with you.

Joel just stared at you, pleading with his eyes for you to understand him. He wanted to say ‘Baby, I love you and wanna fuck you so bad,’ but he couldn't voice it to you. Joel was scared. He was scared of feeling the things he felt for you in a world that was truly unforgiving. He didn't want to feel the pain of losing you, like he had when he lost Sarah. He also didn't want to be alone anymore. So with a huff he said “looks like ya got it all figured out. Don't- don't take too much more time.”

When he turned to leave, you reached out and grabbed him by the arm and said, “what, no kiss goodbye?” You wanted something to hold on to, something that said that all this sexual tension was worth it, that he wanted you. That maybe he actually did love you. But when you saw Joel looking at you with a stone cold look on his face, one that was also mixed with pain, you heard him whisper “no” as he pulled further away.

“Why? Did I do something wrong? Joel, what did I do so wrong, why don’t you want to-”

“No darlin' you didn't do anything wrong.” He said, stopping and smiling kindly at you. “I just- it ain't a good idea right now is all, ok. We can’t, not here. I need to get back.” And with that he yanked his arm out of your grasp and marched towards the cabin once again.

You called back to him and said “why? Joel, I don't understand,” but he never stopped. You were left standing there, now more confused than ever, thinking to yourself, what in the hell was that?

Do you want me to fuck you? Is that what you want? Your words kept playing over and over again in Joel's head from the other night as he marched back to the cabin. Do you even want me Joel? He couldn't stop the racing thoughts as they entered his mind.

When he got back to the cabin, he went inside. Once he was inside he slammed his fist onto the closed door, placing his head against it with his eyes closed. He was breathing hard and fast, heart pounding hard inside his chest. He tried to slow his breathing down when he felt the ache in his chest start again, like it has so many times before. But this time it was a little different, he felt a tightness take over too. His vision started to blur, and his ears began to ring. He was spiraling out of control into a god forsaken panic attack once again.

Before he was sucked too far down into his fears, he felt someone put their hand on his back and softly whisper, “dad you're gonna be ok. Just breathe. Come on, slow breaths for me.”

“I can't, it's too much.” He said, eyes shut tight as he felt his heart pound hard into his chest.

“No, it's not too much. One long breath in, hold for two seconds, then exhale for three. Come on dad, with me.”

Joel heard the breaths going in and out, and the voice that attempted to calm him. He thought he was hallucinating, hearing Sarah’s voice once again, but it sounded different from what he usually could hear in his mind. As he tried to focus on breathing, he struggled. Then he heard the voice say in a soft and gentle manner again, “What scared you?”

“I don't wanna be alone, but I don't want to feel the pain of losing you again” he said, feeling his heart pound faster in his chest at the admittance of what caused his panic attack to start.

“You ain't gonna be alone dad, we love you. Now come on, breathe with me and repeat after me ‘I’m safe, I'm calm, I'm loved.’”

Joel repeated it multiple times, for several minutes, listening to the voice calm him and slow his breathing down. His heart had returned to normal in his chest, vision no longer cloudy and ears no longer ringing. Finally he took a big breath in and out, steadying himself once again. But before he opened his eyes he heard the voice say, “I love you dad, please never forget it.” And then the soft voice was gone. Joel opened his eyes and looked behind him as he slowly watched Ellie walk towards her bedroom. It was then that he realized the soft voice wasn't Sarah, it was Ellie. And his heart constricted once again, but this time out of love for the teenager he traveled with. “Thanks baby girl” he whispered as Ellie walked away. Ellie never acknowledged it, but she heard him loud and clear.

Once you got back, Joel was already in his room with the door shut. Ellie said that when he returned, he just walked in saying that he wasn't feeling well, and then went to lay down in his bedroom. She never told you that he had a panic attack, and that she helped him calm down. You sat talking with Ellie for a bit, she continued to ask you a million questions about what life was like before during Christmas. Eventually you felt your eyelids grow heavy, so with a smile you said “I'm gonna go and get some sleep Ellie. It’s been a long day.” You were still hurt and sensitive about your earlier discussion with Joel, second guessing his feelings for you once again.

Ellie just nodded at you, not saying anything in return. As you got to the hallway you heard her say “just so ya know, te amo means I love you or love you in Spanish. Joel, he's emotionally constipated and hurting right now. He doesn't want to lose you or I like he did Sarah. So, I don't know, just cut him some slack or something. I want a family for Christmas.”

You just looked at Ellie and nodded your head. When she went back to reading her book you went to your own room, letting Joel have the other room by himself. You two needed a break, well mostly you did. You were exhausted and needed to sleep, but didn’t want to lay next to the man who made you ache inside for him when he wouldn’t do anything to help relieve that discomfort. You and Joel used to play around with each other, where he’d use his fingers and mouth to help you get off. But recently he wouldn’t even do that. Something was different with him, and you didn’t know what caused it or why.

After you laid down you found that sleep quickly caught up to you. And for once it gave you pleasant dreams. Dreams of a family and a life that you wanted with a foul mouthed teenager named Ellie, and a wise old grump named Joel. Christmas was going to be great this year, or at least it was like that in your dreams. Little did you know, your dreams would soon become reality.

3 Days Later

“Joel, you can't see for shit beyond ten yards away. You're old and blind” Ellie said, sitting by the fire and talking with Joel.

“What the hell does that even mean, ya little shit? I can see beyond 10 yards, ya smartass, right y/n?”

“Hey, don't bring me into this argument,” you said, laughing at the banter between Joel and Ellie.

“See y/n agrees, you're old as shit Joel.”

“What? How’d you come up with that logic? She didn’t even say anythin,’” Joel huffed, going back and forth with Ellie. The banter between these two for the last few days was getting more frequent, which made you laugh harder each time. It wasn’t that these two were fighting. They were just bickering with each other, playful banter really, and something that reminded you of a family. You remember seeing your uncles do it with their teenage daughters, it reminded you of home.

“Look here smartass, don't go and spread lies ‘bout me that ain't true. If ya can’t verify it or back it up, then you’re just making stuff up.” Joel was now standing tall and pointing a finger at Ellie. Ellie, relaxed on the floor, was questioning Joel in whether or not he could even see to shoot a bow, as he was struggling to read the book in his hands. He kept squinting, huffing to himself and saying that people needed to stop printing books in such small print.

“Joel, you can’t see the large print book in front of you, when it says ‘large print’ on it. You’re fucking blind ya old man, ain’t that right y/n?” Ellie said with a serious look on her face.

“Ellie, god damnit watch your mouth. Ya hear me? I said no swearin’. And you over there,” Joel said while pointing a finger at you, “stop your damn laughing.” You were rolling around on the floor laughing so hard that your stomach hurt at the calm bickering that Ellie and Joel were both doing. You could barely contain your laughter, trying not to hurt or bruise Joel’s ego at the situation that he swore just as bad (and if not worse) than Ellie did, yet he was yelling at her for swearing.

“Damn it, I can’t read this sentence. Y/n what the hell does this even say here with this small print. I tell ya, they don’t make books like they used to.” Joel mumbled to himself, while pointing out the sentence he couldn’t read.

Ellie immediately tried to grab the book, offering to help Joel read it. But Joel quickly batted her hand away, putting the book into your hands. You glared at Ellie and Joel, trying to decide what you should do. Ellie was pleading with her eyes for you to crack a joke so she could continue with the easy conversation of teasing Joel. Joel was looking at you to solve the problem he was having. After a moment you brought the book up so you could read it, deciding to help Ellie have some more fun, and for you to have a little fun with the old man that was in front of you. You needed to relax too, not every interaction with Joel needed to be so intense.

“Ok Joel, I’ll help you. What do you want me to read?” you asked innocently, hiding the devilish smirk behind your calm exterior. When Joel pointed out the sentence, mumbling again how books aren’t created like they used to be, having the print too small, you couldn’t help yourself. You took a deep breath and said, “well first off Joel, this book was written back in 1945. But you’re right, they don’t make them like they used to. And you’d know that perfectly wouldn’t you, with your age.” You then went to start to read the sentence and you noticed that Joel froze as he sat down, looking over at Ellie who was sitting upright, not yet laughing or saying anything at the old reference. You had to hand it to the kid, she patiently waited until your next sentence came out.

“Ok Joel it says, ‘once upon a time, an old man named Joel couldn’t see, so he decided to blame the world for being old. He asked a beautiful, young, and attractive woman to help his poor, old, feeble self by reading something that a blind man could honestly see. So she decided to help, because he was really cute, and in the end, she agreed with the teenager that he was old as fuck. The End.’”

“Gimme that wiseass” he said as you finished. Ellie was now bent over laughing so hard that she was hyperventilating at how much you were in on teasing Joel too. “No respect from the younger generation I tell ya, no respect.” Joel then got up with a groan and sulked towards the bedroom with his book in his hands. When he got to the hallway he turned around and said “if y'all are through laughin’ at me, I’m gonna go and read in the bedroom and get some sleep.”

“Cause you’re old as shit” Ellie said.

Joel, not realizing what Ellie had said out loud, commented “right, see you in the morning.”

You and Ellie both roared with laughter at the fact that Joel didn’t realize what he agreed to. After a moment, he stopped and then hit his head with the palm of his hand, saying, “I didn’t mean that. I’m not agreeing to that.”

You replied, “see Ellie, apparently he’s old, blind and deaf too.”

“No respect I tell ya, none.” He said loudly upon hearing what you said. Huffing to himself, he marched into the bedroom yelling “and yet y’all need me to survive” as he slammed the door.

Both Ellie and you continued to laugh in the living room. After a moment you said “we probably shouldn’t make fun of him so much, he gets a little touchy ya know.”

“I know,” Ellie said, “but it’s so much fun teasing Papa Bear like this. Reminds me of what it’d be like if he was my dad. Well, I’m gonna go to bed.” She said, then getting up and leaving for her room.

“Night Ellie,” you said as Ellie walked towards her bedroom. You sat there in the living room for a little while longer, rubbing your eyes and giggling to yourself at the funny banter that happened. Life was feeling pretty good for a bit. But now with the quiet, you felt your heart constrict and those empty thoughts of being alone came rushing back in. After sitting there in silence you decided to go to bed yourself. Forcing your thoughts to rest in your head at the fact that you were going to be sleeping alone once again.

When morning came, you had decided to bake Christmas cookies in secret. You recruited Ellie to help you keep Joel distracted for the afternoon. Ellie had apologized to Joel in the morning, he had called her a smartass again, but it seemed like he forgave her. He wouldn’t talk to you really, telling you that you were mean to him and that he doesn’t talk to mean people. You knew he was just joking as he gave you a wink and a light hip chuck at the statement when he stood next to you in the kitchen. You’ve never seen this side of Joel, so carefree and fun that it shocked and surprised you, but also turned you on. You loved carefree Joel, someone that you hoped you would be able to see more of. Once Ellie was talking Joel's ear off outside, you started to bake your surprise Christmas cookies.

“Hey old man, why haven’t you told her what Te amo means yet?” Ellie asked, leaving out the part that she already told you what it meant. She wanted Joel to say it to you, knowing that you both loved each other very much and she wanted both of you to be happy.

“Not the right time” was all he said, huffing as he swung the axe to chop firewood. “And stop calling me old” he said with another grunt and swing of the axe.

“When’s the right time Joel?” She questioned, transfixed at what he was doing.

“Dunno” was his only reply as he swung the axe yet again.

“Joel I-”

“Ellie, this ain’t none of your business what her and I- what we- Look, her and I have-”

“God Joel, you’re forgetting that I’m practically an adult, I know you two have your little love sessions. That’s what I mean, if y’all can fuck, then why can’t you tell her that you love her?”

“Keep your voice down” Joel snapped, approaching Ellie for a moment to grab another piece of firewood. “And for the record, we ain’t fuckin’ yet, so-”

“Why not? Can’t get it up old man, is that the problem?” She joked, smiling at her sarcasm that she just gave him.

He just shook his head at her, not answering her. Getting it up was not the problem, that part was evident last night when he went to bed. You had given him a lot of sass last night and Joel hated to admit that it was a huge turn on for him. You were strong, could keep up with him and you weren’t afraid to put him in his place. When he walked into his bedroom last night, he was hard as a rock at the fact that you had a sassy mouth. It only took him a few minutes before he came hard around his fingers, wishing he was buried deep inside of you. This no sex thing was getting to him, he needed you in more ways than one, and he didn’t think he’d be able to hold off for very much longer.

“So what’s the reason Joel?” Ellie said, snapping Joel out of his train of thought.

“I just want to do this right” was all he said.

“How do you ‘do it right?’” Ellie asked genuinely, not understanding the complexity of relationships like this yet.

“What’s with all these questions, huh? Look, her and I, what we- I know what I’m doing, ok? Don’t worry about this, it ain’t your concern.” he said, swinging the axe and chopping another piece of firewood.

Ellie loved teasing Joel, especially about you. You had asked her to go out and keep Joel occupied as you started baking something inside the house. You found an old recipe for Christmas cookies, specifically sugar cookies. You went through the pantry and saw the makings for the cookies and you wanted to do something nice for Joel, considering the tension between you two wasn’t the best at the moment. You didn't know what was the matter, you figured it had everything to do with him remembering his last Christmas with his daughter. That's why you wanted to make this Christmas perfect for him and Ellie too.

“So do you?” Ellie asked Joel as she continued to watch him.

“What?” He said, breathing hard after he swung the axe yet again, chopping another piece of firewood.

“You heard me. Do. You. Love. Her?” she said, emphasizing each word so Joel could hear her. Ellie was genuinely interested in whether or not Joel actually did love you.

Joel, not wanting to talk about his feelings, started sifting through the log piles, pretending like he was trying to find something. Ellie could tell that he was nervous, not wanting to answer the question. She walked over to Joel and then said “Papa Bear, what's the matter?”

“I do. I do love her it's just that-”

“You're just scared to love that hard again, I get it.” Ellie said, smiling at him at his attempted admission. Every time she's ever tried to get Joel to talk about his feelings he's always blow up either at her or at you for asking. So this little attempted admission made Ellie feel good, knowing that he did in fact love you and that Joel felt comfortable enough to share.

“Yeah somethin’ like that. Now enough of making me talk, what are you gonna give y/n for Christmas?” Joel said, trying to change the subject.

Ellie had talked Joel's ear off all afternoon. When he got tired she took a turn and chopped firewood for a little bit. You watched through the window at the two of them, seeing how he just fell into the typical dad role. At one moment you saw her jump on his back to try to get him on the ground. He was able to twist around and finally held her down, tickling her. You could see that he loved that sassy foul mouthed teenager as if it was his own Sarah.

You were finally finished baking the sugar cookies, as they were now cooling on the rack, when all of a sudden you heard Ellie yell “hey y/n, can you come out here for a second?”

When you didn't respond right away, as you were grabbing your boots and coat, you heard Joel yell with a booming voice “woman, get your ass out here now.”

You quickly ran outside saying “What? What's the matter?” When all of a sudden you were hit by a flying snowball. You looked around to see where it had come from when you got hit right in the face again with another one. When that happened, you yelled as it had stung and surprised you.

“Oh shit Joel, you hit her in the face” you heard Ellie say.

“Shh not so loud, you'll give away our position” he countered.

When you looked around eventually you saw Joel and Ellie poke their head out of a little hiding spot. “You shits,” you had said, while forming a snowball yourself and then launching it at them. The next thing you knew, the three of you were having an honest to God snowball fight, like you were all 8 years old again. Quickly though it became girls against the boy, as Joel accidentally hit Ellie in the back of the head and she yelled “What the fuck Joel?”

His response was ��well when ya got a big head, and are in the way, what do ya think will happen?” That caused you and Ellie to form a temporary alliance to get even with Joel.

As the three of you were forming strategic positions and developing an art to this snowball fight, you had an idea to really get Joel back. You went into the kitchen and filled a large pot with ice cold water. This will get him good, you thought. Then Ellie got him cornered and you approached him with the water.

“Woman, now put that down now. No use you gettin’ yourself hurt.” He said, trying to get away from you, but Ellie had him backed into a corner. When Joel saw that you weren't backing down he said “so help me God y/n, if ya do that I'll throw your naked ass in the snow later.”

“Hear that Ellie? I believe Joel just gave me a challenge. What do you think, kid?” You said, while approaching Joel. He was quickly glancing around to try to find an exit, when he couldn’t find one he thought intimidation might stop you.

“Look here, that’s not a challenge little girl. It's a fucking promise. Ya do that I will throw your ass naked in the snow.” When you didn’t back down he quickly shouted, “woman, put it down now or else-” and that's when you did it. You tossed the water at Joel and drenched the entire front of him. He immediately yelled saying, “Jesus Christ, that's cold. Ya tryin' to freeze my balls off here or somethin’? What's gotten into you?” He then got grumpy and started walking inside, not wanting to look at anyone anymore. He looked like a wet pup, and boy did it make you and Ellie laugh.

When Joel entered the cabin he stopped as he smelled a familiar old scent in the air. When you walked in behind him you put your hand on his back and said, “Merry Christmas Joel.” He turned around, and said, “did ya bake Christmas cookies?”

“Of course I did, honey. Sugar cookies only though. It was the only thing I could find the ingredients for.” You said, biting your lip nervously. Ingredients were hard to come by but you managed to find enough for a batch of cookies, and then some left over for bread. Sugar cookies were cooling on the wrack and bread was still baking in the oven. You knew they wouldn't have that fresh taste as you had no idea how old the ingredients were. You couldn't use chicken eggs or butter, so you substituted it for some water and other ingredients like stored coconut oil you found that was still ok.

Joel stood there sniffing the air, a wide grin plastered onto his face. He may be a man in his 50s, but right now in this moment he looked like a young boy, excited to have baked Christmas goods. “Um, do ya think that maybe I could-” Joel said, shuffling over to where the cookies were cooling, dropping large pools of water everywhere with how wet he was.

When you looked down you giggled to yourself at how his threat of throwing you into the snow naked hadn’t happened yet, something that you weren’t going to remind him of. “Hey, how ‘bout you go and get outta those wet clothes, then come over and have the first official taste test. Let me know how I did.” You said, nudging him gently towards the bedroom where some warm and dry clothes were.

Joel nodded and quickly shuffled off to change his clothes, leaving large drops of water all the way down the hall. “Is he gone?” Ellie asked, peeking her head around the door while still standing outside, not wanting to get attacked herself with water from Joel.

“Yeah, he went to go and change quick,” you said, bending over and checking the bread. Seeing that the bread was done, golden brown but flat, you took it out of the oven and shut the oven off. You stood there glancing at it and then pinched the bridge of your nose, muttering to yourself, “well, it didn't rise right. That yeast must be too old.”

“Still smells amazing darlin', I'm not picky” you heard Joel say, standing close behind you. When you turned around to look at him, you saw a flash of something different. It almost looked like happiness, something you don’t think you’d ever see Joel have. “Well Ellie, ya want your first taste of a Christmas cookie?” Joel asked, then motioned for Ellie to take one and bite into it first. “Well how does it taste?” He said, smiling at the way her eyes lit up, savoring the bite like it was the best thing that she’d ever tasted.

After a moment she said “um- wow. That's really fucking good.”

“Language Ellie, Jesus Christ” Joel mumbled. “Damn kid needs to watch her mouth.”

You silently laughed because it was like watching a father and daughter interact once again. Soon Joel bit into the cookie himself, and then he moaned at the taste. “For something so old it sure tastes damn good” he mouthed, cookie still half in his mouth.

“Yeah, I know you taste good,” you said softly so Ellie couldn't hear.

Joel started sputtering and coughing at the statement of you referencing how he tasted and his age. He grumbled to himself saying, “Dammit woman, you're gonna kill me one of these days. Jesus.”

Ellie was still going on about the taste of the cookie and how it compared to other things she's tried, that she didn’t catch the slight sexual innuendo interaction that you and Joel just had. According to her, the stale taste of the cookie ranked high on her list of her favorites. The three of you enjoyed a total of two cookies each, agreeing that you should keep the rest for later, just in case Santa would come. Ellie, even though being older, was still holding out hope that a big fat guy in a red Santa suit was actually real. What she didn’t realize was that she was going to see Santa sometime soon.

A Day Later

Joel decided to go out hunting, to see if he could bring back a true Christmas feast for you and Ellie. Ellie decided to go with him, saying that she wanted to prove that she would do a better job at shooting something, telling Joel that he couldn’t see. The same argument that started a few days ago about a book continued as they walked off into the woods together. They were gone a long time and when they returned, it was almost dark out. When they returned Ellie came running inside saying that she shot a deer. You congratulated her, saying that you were proud of her for being an expert marksman. When you went out to help Joel dress the deer, you found him laughing silently to himself.

“What's so funny?” You asked as you slowly approached him.

“That kid over there.” He said, kneeling down and craving into the deer while motioning with his head in the direction that Ellie went. You looked down at him and gestured for him to continue with your hands. “She- uh, she never hit the deer. That one couldn't hit the broad side of a barn, so I had to kill it. But I-I made it look like she did it.” He said laughing and shaking his head.

Joel then told you that when Ellie pulled back the bow and shot at the deer, that she missed. She had immediately shut her eyes, not seeing if she hit the deer but asked Joel if she did. Joel, having already had his bow drawn, saw that she hit a tree stump only 3 feet away. When he realized that she missed he released his arrow and killed the deer, you three did need to eat after all. However, after he killed the deer, he had decided to tell Ellie that she did it, knowing that it'd make her day. “So ya see, I couldn’t not help the little shit” Joel said laughing out loud. “She made this big fuss about it ahead of time, and I couldn't just break her heart in telling her that all she managed to truly kill was the tree.”

“Aw you're so sweet, you know that” you said, smiling at Joel looking out for Ellie.

“Yeah, I've been told that a few times I reckon” he said while standing up and looking at you with dark hungry eyes. “I’ve been also called old and an asshole too many times too,” he stated with a smirk, then bending down again to continue to slice into the deer.

You didn't know how to respond to his teasing, so you just stood there silent. After a moment you turned to head back into the house when you heard Joel say, “Te amo, baby.” You still didn't know what he was saying in Spanish, if Ellie was true with her statement, it meant that he loved you. So before you entered the house you gently replied back, “Te amo Joel and Merry Christmas.”

When Joel was finished dressing the deer he cooked the venison. As soon as you bit into the cooked venison you let out a low moan in pleasure. The explosion of flavors with fresh meat felt amazing to your taste buds. Joel hummed in contentment and blushed a rosey red in his cheeks at your outward display of gratitude. You told him that it tasted amazing and that he was the best cook ever, even Ellie agreed with you.

After the food was consumed, and the table was cleared, the three of you sat around the fire. You and Joel taught Ellie Christmas songs and you three all enjoyed feeling like a family for once. When time came to open up the presents, you could see that Ellie was just like a toddler. She was jumping for joy at seeing things under the tree for her that was wrapped up in old rags as wrapping paper with her name on them. As she opened her presents, she was excited at what she saw.

Joel gave Ellie a warmer winter jacket, one that he found at the other abandoned cabin that was located about five miles West from where the three of you were. He found the cabin about a month ago, abandoned just like this one was. He had been bringing over more supplies from there periodically. The jacket that he found was too small for you or him, but it fit Ellie perfectly. When she tried it on she was beaming at how comfortable it felt, and how warm it was.

You had given Ellie a handmade necklace, made out of different rhinestones that you had found in a storage craft box in the cellar. Crafts were something that you always loved to do when you were younger, and something you’d do in the QZ if you could find them. Joel and you also gave Ellie three joke books that you both found. As soon as she saw them she started crying, saying that it was the most perfect Christmas she’s ever had, and yet the biggest surprise wasn't even there yet.

Joel and Ellie both gave you a Wilderness Cookbook, something that he found in the other cabin also. He explained to you that the cookbook had recipes of how to cook rabbit, venison, and other things in the wilderness. You were grateful and thanked them both. Joel then whispered quietly in your ear, “I got something private, just for the two of us to indulge in later.” He said, gently squeezing your knee when you looked up at him with hopeful eyes, questioning him silently for what he had planned. You then saw Joel slowly open his mouth, sticking just the tip of his tongue out, as he moved the tip of his tongue back and forth fast. Using the same motions that he did when he’d eat you out. You blushed a dark crimson shade of red and quickly adjusted in your seat. Your panties suddenly felt too tight on you as you pushed your thighs together for some relief at the throb you felt in your core. “Later” he whispered again to you, while giving you another gentle squeeze to your knee and a chaste kiss to your cheek.

Joel then opened a few Western books from Ellie, ones that you had given her. You had just finished reading them recently and you knew that Joel wanted to read the books. So you gave them to Ellie and told her that you had found them at the other cabin and thought that maybe Joel would like to read them. Joel thanked Ellie and acted all surprised at seeing the books. Neither one of you told her that Joel had already asked to borrow them from you whenever you were finished reading them.

Joel then also opened a small homemade bracelet from you that you had made him. The bracelet had a butterfly pendant attached to it. When he saw it, Joel froze and just looked up at you. “Tess told me that Sarah used to love butterfly’s.” You told him as he gently ran his finger over the pendant. “Joel, if I could give you Sarah I would but-”

“No, it's alright. It's beautiful.” he said, sniffling slightly at the sight. Sarah, his babygirl, God he missed her. After a moment he quickly shook his head and then stood up, remembering that he still had two other gifts to give. Joel quickly said, “um, excuse me for a moment. I ah- I need to grab something” and then he disappeared by walking outside. Ellie was so focused on her joke books that she never saw Joel leave. All of a sudden you heard a knock at the door, followed by a “Ho, Ho, Ho” behind it. Ellie immediately tensed and you casually went over to the door, holding a gun for good measure, nevermind you knew who was behind the door. When you opened the door you saw Joel dressed head to toe in a Santa suit.

“Howdy there little lady- Jesus Christ woman, ya gonna shoot me or somethin’?” he said, shaking his head, looking at the gun you had pointed at him. “I heard y’all been having a hard time here so I thought I’d bring ya some Christmas cheer.”

Ellie immediately started laughing as Joel struggled with the Santa suit. “Joel, you look funny in a fat suit,” she said, laughing out loud at a pillow peeking through his Santa jacket.

“I haven't heard of no Joel before, I'm Santa.” He said, with a husky voice.

“So what happened to Joel? Did ya kill him when you landed your fat ass on top of him with your sleigh? Crushed him didn't you? It's ok, he probably deserved it. Killed by an old worn out fat guy with no fashion sense. Better than a clicker really, ya know.” Ellie said, laughing.

“Ok, look here wiseass, I ain't no old fat guy.” Joel said, grumbling to himself in his regular voice.

“Well you look ridiculous dressed like that.” Ellie said, doubling over and laughing hard again. You were rolling on the floor with a pillow over your mouth laughing at Joel and Ellie bantering again. You didn't know why, but seeing these two go at each other warmed your heart in a way that you never knew.

When Joel looked over at you he said “You stop your laughin’ over there” as he pulled the pillow out from his stomach and sat down with a huff on the couch. “Got no respect from the younger generation anymore. Ya hear me, no respect. Here I am tryin’ to make your Christmas special and all ya do is laugh at me and-”

“Joel it's ok” Ellie said, interrupting Joel’s little rant. “We love you anyways Joel, ain’t that right y/n?” Ellie continued, trying to look serious but failing miserably at it.

“Honey, you look amazing and-”

“Both of you just shut it, I know when I'm not loved.” He said, shaking his head and mumbling. “Shouldn't have to give ya both these now, but here ya go.” Joel handed you a small box. “Here ya go wiseass, so you don't feel left out either.” He said, shoving a box in Ellie's hands.

Ellie and you both quieted down and then looked at the little boxes in your hands with a piece of paper folded up over top of them. “Ellie why don't you go first,” you said, wanting her to enjoy the gift.

When Ellie opened the box she found a small seashell bracelet with black thick string with it and the piece of paper was a note that read the following:

My dearest Ellie,

I know I ain't your father, but over the past year you've grown so much on me kid. Ya got that sassy, smartass mouth on ya, and ya got a horrible attitude to boot. But you're strong kid, so strong. And you remind me of what my daughter Sarah was like, but so much more. I know your favorite thing is the Sea and one day I promise I’ll take ya there, and build those sandcastles with you, as tall as me. I love ya kid, like you were my own little baby girl. I wear a copy of your bracelet as a symbol of my love for ya honey.

Forever, my love for you child, Joel (or Dad if ya want)

After Ellie was done reading the note out loud, you found that you both were crying. Ellie immediately ran over to Joel, hugged him tight, crying into his shoulder saying, “you better fucking mean it. Swear to God you mean this Joel, and don't lie to me.”

“Baby girl, I swear to God everything in that note is true. I love ya like you’re my own honey, like you’re my true daughter cause ya are.” Joel then held Ellie, kissing the top of her head as she cried into his shoulder, this time her tears were tears of joy. Ellie got her Christmas wish after all, a family, something that she has never had ever in her life.

After a moment of them holding each other, they pulled apart and both looked at you. It was now your turn to read the note and to open the gift from Joel. You hands were shaking and you were panicking. You wanted more than anything for someone to love you, a man, with no strings attached. You were scared of what you were going to read in the note. But with a shaky breath, you opened your note and read it out loud.

Y/n,

The first time I laid eyes on you it was in the QZ and I thought that I had finally died and had gone to Heaven. My heart stopped in my chest darlin’, and I became nervous, still am when I look at ya. I remember thinkin’ that you were the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen, and baby, you still are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen.

The first time I kissed you, I was a goner. Forever to be the only woman that I’d ever want in life again. I used to be so angry, not because I didn’t want ya, but because I thought that I couldn't do any of this right. I couldn't date you properly, marry you, or even have babies with you the way that I’ve wanted to. And baby, I was so angry, I was angry because you deserve all of that from the world, and so much more. But then I realized somethin’, you and Ellie were sent from Heaven above, from my Sarah to help me now. For me to love and be loved once again.

I prayed honey, I prayed so hard for so many years, wanting to see my little girl again that was taken from me. And I don't know how or why, but somehow she sent me you two. And God, if I don't now have something worth fightin’ for. You and Ellie make this life bearable, make me want to live again. And truthfully, I'd be lost without ya both.

Now I know I ain't always good with my words, or tellin’ ya how I feel. But Angel, you mean everything t’me. Now open your gift honey, and let me tell you with the words myself.

You turned to Joel with tears in your eyes and trembling fingers while he gently coaxed you to open your gift. “Go on darlin', open it.” he said, ever so gently. When you opened your gift you gasped out loud. Inside the box was a ring, a birthstone ring for June, your birth month. You looked shocked at Joel when you saw it. He motioned for you to give him the ring.

With the ring in his hand he then reached out and held your hands, looking you in the eyes saying, “you mean everything t’me y/n and so much more. If you'll have me, I want you to wear this on a specific finger baby.”

Joel slowly took your left ring finger in his hand while holding the ring in his right hand. “I found this in a jewelry box in that other cabin and I thought Sarah must be telling me somethin’. I know it's not the proper one, but hell, nothin' is proper anymore. I promise if we ever get back to civilization again, I'll do this right. I swear it baby. Please be mine. Forever.”

You looked at the ring that Joel was holding, confusion washing over your face for a moment, not understanding what he was meaning. Joel looked over to Ellie and she smiled, understanding what was happening and gently said to Joel “dad, it’s time to tell mom what you told me in secret before.”

Joel nodded and took a breath to steady his nerves as he looked into your eyes. When he stared into your eyes he saw your hesitation. Not because you didn't want what he felt, but because you did and you were so scared that he didn't feel the same way. So with renewed confidence he said “I promise I'll do this right later if we can. But y/n-” and then he felt it, the pain searing tight in his chest at the thought of losing this, of losing you. It gripped him so hard, and tried to swallow him whole at the thought that he couldn't keep you safe. He was scared, and frightened at the thought of losing you or Ellie like he did Sarah. But this time as the pain consumed him, his thoughts drifted to Sarah. Sarah knew that her father loved her with everything, even as he held her when she died.

Joel remembered the night that Sarah was conceived. The way he and Sarah's mom desperately moved in unison together, trying to grab onto something for stability in a world that they felt was falling apart. He never connected with Sarah's mom again after that, it was only on that one night when she was created. It was like the world, the universe, told him that he needed to be a father at a younger age. He felt like that was the reason why his first marriage with Sarah’s mom failed. That they never were truly in love, except for where Sarah was concerned. But now things were different, especially with you. Joel was in love with you in a way that he's never been with a woman before. So with a smile and a chuckle he shook his head, finally finding the strength that he needed, to be able to say the next part out loud.

“Woman, you drive me nuts and make me feel things I, at my age, didn't think I deserved to feel anymore. I used to think you were sent here to torture me, make me pay for all of my sins. But then I saw what it was. That Sarah sent you to me because she had heard my darkest fears, my biggest dreams, and my silent pleas in the night. That I didn’t want to be lonely, that I wanted a family once again. And that I wanted a woman to love me so bad that it hurt, and not because I forced her, but because she wanted to. And baby, I got you and now you got me. Sarah sent me you and Ellie so I could be happy and not be so lonely anymore.”

With a shaky breath Joel continued, opening his heart even wider for you to see. “I've made mistakes darlin’, said and done the wrong thing most of the time. Hell, I’ve yelled at you and sometimes have treated you horrible, for that I’m sorry. But I'm scared. I'm scared to lose both you and Ellie. I love that kid over there like I was the one who created her, like she was my own daughter. And I view you as if you were her mother and my-” Joel shook his head, feeling the burn in the back of his throat hit as he struggled to say that he viewed you as his wife.

“Te Amo Joel. I love you” you said, softly towards Joel while holding his hand. Now that you said it, you hoped that he'd say it back. You just wanted him to say it to you in English, to tell you that he in fact did love you, and not just hint at it anymore. You wanted to hear those three words from him. But you never expected him to say what he was about to with you.

After a moment of looking at you he smiled, while looking down at your hands. He gently squeezed them to remind himself that you were still here. Then he looked up into your eyes and said, “Ah hell woman, marry me please? I know it's not conventional, but this ring I got you, it goes on your left ring finger baby and I-. Shit. I-I want you in this life and the next, ok. I promise I'll spend the rest of my life showing you how much I love you. Te amo baby, it means I love you. I love ya woman, so damn much. And I know I don't deserve it but I'm askin’ anyways. Marry me honey, please, make me the happiest man and I promise I’ll-”

It was in that moment that you crashed your lips hard to Joel’s mouth. You wanted to shut up his rambling but also show him that you were so happy. That was what the feeling was in your chest right now, happiness, something that you didn’t think you could ever feel or again. As you kissed Joel, a million thoughts were running through your head. You never thought he'd say any of this to you ever. But when you looked inside yourself you knew you loved this man more than anything. Yeah sure, he was cold, moody, and a complete ass sometimes. He hasn’t always done or said the right thing, but he has been there and protected you when other people should have but didn’t, or when others had walked away. To you, that meant more than anything, that he’d stay and was truly committed to you.

When you pulled away from the quick kiss you said out loud “yes. Yes Joel. Te amo baby, te amo. I'll marry you.” And with that admission Joel crashed his lips hard onto your mouth. There was nothing gentle about this kiss that he gave you, it was like the flood gates finally opened and Joel gave you his entire heart and soul right here and now. The kiss said everything that the two of you haven't been able to say to each other. That you both needed each other and that you both were there for each other.

When you gently parted your mouth for a breath, Joel licked into it in a way that a husband claimed his wife. It was heady and needy. Both of you kissed each other fervently, finally allowing the dam to break between you two. You both were lost in the moment, feeling the passion rise up between you that you had forgotten that Ellie was still in the room. All of a sudden you heard a heavy sigh followed by a smartass teenage girl.

“Look here assholes, I ain't wantin’ to watch you two fuck, so can you both tone it down for the kid in the room, please. Joel, you promised me we could have more Christmas cookies and then tell more stories. Come on.” Ellie said, exhaling loudly.

Joel pulled away and snapped saying “Ellie, language.” He fully pulled apart from you, placing the ring on your left ring finger, then gave you a chaste kiss on the mouth while whispering, “we'll continue this discussion later baby.” You gently nodded in return.

The three of you then sat around the fire telling funny stories to Ellie about Christmas. Joel told the classic tale of ‘A Christmas Story’ for the first time to Ellie, something that he still remembered by heart as it was Sarah’s favorite Christmas story. Both Ellie and you eventually fell asleep on the floor, heads touching at the top and holding hands as a family as you both looked up at Joel, listening to him tell the story.

Even after knowing you two fell asleep, Joel continued reciting the story until it was done. When he was finished he grabbed blankets from the bedroom and tucked both you and Ellie in. Smiling to himself he laid down on the couch, content at having a family once again. Joel was relieved that his family, even though unconventional, loved him fully in return. As sleep slowly crept up, he found himself turning to one side and staring at the low light of the Christmas tree. This time, it was as if he could see her again yet again, his Sarah, just sitting down and smiling at him. His heart felt full today, something that hadn’t happened since the last Christmas he had with his daughter, about 20 years ago. As Joel slowly drifted off to sleep he swore he heard Sarah say to him ‘Merry Christmas Dad, here's my Christmas wish for you. For you to have a family once again. And always remember, that I love you.’

-End Chapter-

A/N: This one was a heck of a roller coaster to write on so many emotional levels. These three will be back in the future, got some fun things planned for them. Enjoy, and be sure to check out my other series and one shots in my Master list.

Taglist: @punkshort @shotgun-shelby @strawbunnyx @orcasoul @pedritoferg @chiogarza @jesfreedark @untamedheart81 @rainbow12346 @nandan11 @swiftpascal @eliza-8 @joeldjarin @vickie5446 @nastiasnow @staywildflowahchild @ratoonstown @l3laze @its-always-420-on-the-moon @kirsteng42

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p0patochisps · 4 months

Note

What IS Epic The Musical

I WAS WAITING FOR THIS GOD DAMN MOMENT.

OKAY. BUCKLE YOUR SEATBELT ANON, BECAUSE YOU JUST UNLEASHED MY ADVERTISEMENT SIDE /HJ

According to the EPIC website, EPIC is a loose musical adaptation of Homer's Odyssey written by Jorge 'Jay' Rivera-Herrans. Jay also voices Odysseus, the main character of the musical.

It is completely sung through, consisting of 40 songs. The musical has two acts, which are then split into nine 'sagas'. There are five sagas in act one (Troy, Cyclops, Ocean, Circe and Underworld) and four in act two (Thunder, Wisdom, Vengeance, and Ithica).

As the show is still a work in progress, the songs are still being released on platforms in their entirety. As of right now, the Troy, Cyclops, and Ocean sagas have been released with the Circe saga coming sometime soon.

Jay posts consistently on platforms such as TikTok and YouTube, showing his working progress with little sneak peaks at the songs and little bits of information about each of them that really enhance the listening experience!

Plot wise, like I said, EPIC is loosely based on Homer's Odyssey. Homer was an ancient Greek poet, and he is credited for both the Odyssey and the Iliad.

The iliad is the first of the two, telling the story of the Trojan War and all that happened. The Odyssey is about the journey Odysseus and the six hundred Ithican soldiers took to return to their homeland post-war (Spoiler alert. It doesn't work out very well)

EPIC follows Odysseus as he tries so very, very hard to return to his wife, Penelope, and his son, Telemachus. However, every monster, God, and Goddess in the entirety of Greece and Olympus seems to have beef with this man and he struggles to get home.

He's somehow meant to be one of the most intelligent Greeks out there, cunning and clever and a brilliant soldier (so much so that Athena- Goddess of W i s d o m- decides to be his mentor) and yet he has a knack of pissing everyone off.

Anyway, the Trojan War took him away from Ithica and his family for ten years, and then EPIC follows his stupidly long and complicated journey home in the most stunning, heart-wrenching, tear jerking, awe inspiring way it can.

It's greek mythology, what isn't there to love about it.

I doooo heavily recommend it. So, so very much. So much. Jay is so very, very talented, and all of the singers in EPIC are so very talented. I think the songs are on most platforms (I'll link spotify and YouTube below). I also recommend looking at his TikTok or YouTube pages because this man is hilarious, and the process to the creation of this musical is so very interesting.

Okay bye bye :))

https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLqxvpcFchZLtYj30bSGmm64JibFLaWOAJ&si=fRBt3GoRCwew5_Sd

^this has all thirteen released songs on for YouTube.

https://youtube.com/@JayHerrans?si=7qR098QuuulGBxYg

^This is Jay's YouTube page.

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6T7xIAK4W0Fwxp04fSjpE9?si=iccq-vm-SD-i5X0TcXMTBw&pi=e-RZKH3MfvTXmQ

^This is a playlist of released songs on Spotify.

https://www.tiktok.com/@jorgeherrans?_t=8j0ebB8Ka7V&_r=1

^This is Jay's TikTok.

He is also on iTunes but I don't have an account and I can't be bothered to make one (sorry)

IF YOU LISTEN, DROP ME A MESSAGE OR A COMMENT BECAUSE I LIKE TO TALK ABOUT IT.

#epic the musical #the odyssey #jorge rivera herrans #uh #cyclops saga #ocean saga #troy saga

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horrorvisuals · 9 months

Text

Obscure (2004)

Obscure is a survival horror game emphasizing co-op gameplay with its wide range of characters. Taking place inside a massive school building, it lets you control five main characters and is still playable on modern PCs!

Obscure gives you the ability to control any of these five characters and what's better is, that they all have different features, personalities, and abilities.

There is technically a 6th playable character but I won't say more on that to not spoil things.

As I was saying, abilities. They are pretty interesting. For example, Josh lets you know if there is anything left to do in an area. Items to pick up or things to interact with, that kind of stuff. Pretty crucial for thorough exploration. It's important in a survival horror game.

Stan cracks locks easier due to his background, Kenny runs fast and packs a strong punch, Shannon gives tips when you're stuck on puzzles and heals other characters, and Ashley is better at using weapons.

They all have their own benefits!

Obscure plays pretty much like any other survival horror game from back in the day. It features semi-dynamic camera angles, with semi-tank controls. Exploration, item management, combat, navigation, everything is here.

As a somewhat unique feature though, Obscure also lets you combine some items with others and actively use them. For example, you can tape a flashlight to any firearm in the game if you can find adhesive tape.

Aside from firearms, the game also features melee weapons and they're pretty simple to use. There is a good "feeling" to them. They pack quite the punch.

In Obscure, darkness is your enemy. If you played Alan Wake, then you might recognize its flashlight mechanic. When focus your flashlight on dark areas, you banish the darkness around those areas. You also use it in the same way to weaken the monsters before attacking them.

The character change mechanic is pretty slick too. You just press a single button and change the characters. Obviously, you don't just run around with a party of 5 people all the time. You always play in pairs.

There are, however, meeting spots in the game and you are able to change to other characters in these spots. These also act as fast-travel points and help you navigate the environment more efficiently.

Story-wise, Obscure has some intriguing moments and an overall compelling narrative. The game starts with Kenny playing basketball by himself after school. His stuff gets stolen and he follows the thief to a suspicious-looking cellar inside the school grounds.

Later on, things happen, people disappear and you find yourself in a (mostly) abandoned school. It consists of massive corridors, classrooms, underground sections, and yards, it's a survival horror fanatic's dream.

Obscure has a perma-death mechanic. If any of the characters die at any point in the game, they are out for good. Obviously, you can go back to a previous save and get them back but if you are looking for a more hardcore challenge, it's there.

I keep emphasizing its co-op play feature but while Obscure is definitely more entertaining with a friend, it's completely playable solo as well. Whichever pair you choose, the other student is always controlled by AI and they're usually pretty decent.

The best thing about all this is that Obscure is still playable on Steam. It plays well, it's compatible with higher resolutions and you can actually play co-op using Steam's Remote Play feature. It's just like couch co-op.

Its sequel, Obscure 2 is also on Steam and it's also perfectly playable. I'll make another thread for it if you enjoy reading this one.

Seriously, if you haven't played these games before, I can't recommend them enough. They are great games AND they're playable in co-op. How many classic co-op survival horror games do we have these days? Not many, let me tell you that.

Let me know if you give it a shot. I'm curious if you're gonna like it. And if you have already played it, then tell other people why they shouldn't skip this one. Here is the Steam link for the game.

It's actually on sale right now along with its sequel.

#horror #horror games #horrorvisuals #survival horror #horror game #retro #video games #obscure

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weskersluvrrrrrrrrr · 1 year

Note

Can you make a nsfw stars Wesker x reader story, where he does Y/n in the laboratory in the mansion after she finds out that he’s a traitor?? This is my first time requesting, sorry if it’s bad.

I low-key love this request but also don't because me no good at make plot

little bit darker than most of my stuff, includes coerced sex (I think this is considered dub con) not sane, safe, and barely consensual

Rough and angrier wesker then I normally write

If any of this makes you uncomfortable please do not read (I could barely write this myself lol)

NSFW, afab reader, no pronouns

----

"Stay here, wait for my return. I should be back quickly." We're the last words you heard your captain speak to you, after that he left you in one of the mansions bedrooms before jogging out into the main room of the house. It was boring to sit there and you had assumed you fell asleep, due to waking up what felt like hours later. By time you had awoke you had grown tired of waiting and instead picked up your gun, and started wandering the mansion. The intricate and antique decor of the house, along with the limited light, gave for a spooky vibe. You tried to best to ignore the warnings, nothing could be heard, you hadn't seen anyone yet, and blood was smeared all over the floors and wall. Stumbling around, you found a basement, and inside that basement was a door, glowing light behind it and the faint echo of footsteps. Without hesitation you force open the door, holding up your gun as you do so ready to fire. The person in the room stopped and turned to look at you, scowling for a moment before they had a shocked expression.

"Captain...? What the hell are you doing. And where are Chris and Jill."

"Didn't I tell you to wait for me? Just what do you think you're doing out of that room."

You step farther into the lab, the door to the room swinging shut behind you. If you had known what was about to happen you would have run back out and gone far, far away from this place.

"You didn't answer my question. Where are Chris and Jill."

"That is none of your concern. Now, why are you here, you were supposed to stay in the room I placed you in." He growls under his breath and you start walking towards him, standing by some messy lab tables and counter tops with failed experiments. The lights don't help illuminate the room very well, the room glowing a faint blue as you squint trying to see the man in front of you.

"It is some of my concern! They we're apart of STARS, same as me! What happened to them Wesker!?" You get up in his face and yell, but cut yourself off. Instead you stared at the red adorning his face. "Blood... what happened down here Wesker...?" Further down, his clothes are torn and tattered, coated with a mixture of his own blood and others.

"That's it, my patience has reached it's end." He slams you onto one of the tables, hovering above you snarling, his glasses slip down, and shows off his glowing, red eyes. You gasp and shake, you've come to a realization.

Albert Wesker isn't human anymore.

His hand immediately shoots to your throat, his other holding your hands above your head easily. The hand on your throat squeezes it, cutting off your airflow quickly and removing your ability to think anymore then you have, to focused about living.

"You should have listened to me. If you did this wouldn't have come to this. I was going to take my sweet time with you too, but I guess what must be done, must be done."

"Wait-!" You claw at his wrist, though it being pointless for his strength. Strength wise your Captain would most likely forever have an edge above you, and it made him grin as he watched you hopelessly attack him. Grabbing and Clawing at his wrist as you desperately tried to plead with him. "Please-! Stop-!"

"Stop? But why should I. Not when I'm having so much fun with you." He loosens his grasp, enough for you to talk easier at least, yet still enough to watch you squirm and heave.

"I-i'll do any-anything. J-just please do-don't kill me-" Squeezing again he thinks over the idea you've proposed.

"Anything, you say..." A devilish grin crossed his face as he stared down at you. "Are you sure about that offer, sweetheart?" His tone was mockingly sweet, jabbing at you for begging so pathetically.

"Y-yes...anything- just- please-" Speaking felt impossible with the way he was squeezing your throat, digging his nails in as well. The pain burned and you felt light headed and once he finally released you the dizziness stayed. It only really went away after you finally got air in your lungs again, gasping and choking as you tried to breathe again.

"That was a foolish offer you made, but I'm happy to take this opportunity to have you for myself." You stare up at him, unresponsive, still trying to catch your breath. The hand trapping your hands let's go and returns to his side. "Stand up and turn around."

"What-"

"You said you would do anything to live, now do as I say or you'll end up on a missing poster." Something you learned from the years of working with Wesker, he made promises, never threats. He stepped away from you and you slowly got up, doing as you were told. Facing away from him, you yelped out in shock as he pushed your head and chest onto the table. "I think I'll have fun breaking you.."

"What- what are you gonna do to me-?"

"Whatever I want, Dearheart."

I'm gonna make a part two to this I just can't motivate myself to get to the actual smut part. THERE WILL BE A SECOND PART. AND I WILL WRITE FUCKIN SMUT.

#albert wesker #albert wesker x reader #resident evil #wesker hcs #stars wesker #wesker x you

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beebopboom · 4 months

Text

Words of a Wise Angel

(Intro, part 1, part 2, part 3)

Finally made it to the end - four post later for a character that only has around 10 minutes of screen time - and there was going to be more

Originally this was going to be how the Metatron fashioned himself the king in God's game of chess and was going to relate it to Shakespearean Kings heck we were even going to go into Monty Python and the Holy Grail - but honestly I kind of just lost the motivation……maybe in the future I'll revisit.

However I still got shit to say.

(oh my god how did this get so long - I promise I’m a little sane over here)

So let's look into his actions in the show and maybe fill in some blanks

Disclaimer: just want to say I am focusing on The Metatron (obviously), his pov, and how he twist things - not what happened between Aziraphale and Crowley in the final 15, besides like one thing - just heavy emphasis on that

The Judge

(Of a very weird courtroom)

The trial itself seems to mirror Hell's trial in the way there is no true defense - I’m sensing a pattern

In the trial of Gabriel he is centered in the middle - at this moment neither left or right

He doesn't cut in until Gabriel starts going on about what an angel just gotta do sometimes- and brings up a reminder of what happened to the last angel of his position that started with this way of thinking - it after all is a great story for controlling and best not be repeated because then it looks bad on Heaven's part

This establishes The Metatron as a character whose main concern is the reputation of Heaven - that even though this is an action that is casting out worthy he won’t can’t do it because then it would be an upheaval.

But he frames it as a kindness, as if he was doing a favor - it's manipulative, it keeps the "Heaven is all good, here look we are doing a special favor just for you” narrative going

After Gabriel leaves he moves to the side and brings up that it is taking him a while to come back but for the most part takes a backseat to the happenings around him until they start talking about ringing the alarm bells -

He tells them they are just going to have to find him and he is amused about it. Which tells me a few things

that he doesn't want this getting out yet- fewer that know the better

he didn't actually care about what happened to Gabriel - in fact this might even be a better outcome for him in the way he just doesn't have to deal with him any more

he doesn't actually think they will find him

this might just be a great story - let’s just let it play out

Now this is all happening right before episode 1 perhaps bleeding into the time where Crowley and Shax are talking (which begs the question of how does Shax know) - so it is days before we see him again, a very eventful few days

The First move

When he does show back up he’s in a corporation and getting coffee - second in line behind Mrs. Sandwich.

And his eye is on Crowley - he watches Crowley converse with these two humans and bring Mr. Brown back

Now the coffee shop - I lied I do have something to add

So before even ordering what is he witnessing? Maggie and Nina having a moment - where Nina accepts Maggie's offer of help and asks her to go get milk for her and we as an audience can see this is a big moment for Nina.

Now imagine what it is to a staple of Whickber St. and someone who is not hesitant to tell her opinion about Nina's relationship and just so happens to be first in line, Mrs. Sandwich. I would not be surprised at all if she made a remark to Nina - a remark The Metatron overheard, so now he has the following information

they are friendly with Crowley

something is up with their relationship

But now it's his turn to order - and Maggie is back how long did your order take Sandwich!? - and asks for his oatmilk latte with almond syrup and his whole human picking coffee over death being predictable thing - and yet this isn't the end of their conversation

The next time we see Maggie and Nina they are getting ready to head back over to the bookshop but what got them on this conversation in the first place? That's right I'm suggesting the Metatron said or did something. Nothing to overt but something that got them thinking, talking, and maybe wanting to confront a certain duo about it

But back to the Metatron - he has entered the bookshop and interrupted Michael

Now the Metatron has always been a character that uses human expressions and his funny little words. But he comes right out the gate with balderdash and piffle so lets talk about them

They mean practically the same thing and yet he repeats it twice so why? I think it has something to do with their origins

Balderdash - although it is not certain it is said to originate during Shakespearean times, around this time though would have been used to describe a mixed drink

Piffle - started to appear 1860 - 1870ish

They are also both games and when you search them together it is a british show that goes into the origins of words - so yeah just keep those dates in mind

He uses Crowley to point out who he is - the demon who has a bad history with him, another subtle reminder of what going against Heaven gets you.

Then he starts up with the praise for Aziraphale who actually says his name, and we see a shift in tone from when he is addressing Aziraphale and then ordering the Archangels back to Heaven - which here is another one of the human phrases, spit spot

Spit spot - I don't know exactly when it was created but it is most commonly recognized as something Mary Poppins said, which the books where published between 1934 - 1988 with the movie coming out in 1964

But anyway (I promise there is a point to those) the Archangels reaction to him, Uriel's specifically. They are nervous, they are stuttering, they are praising him - they are groveling in front of him as if he were a king, and it reminds me of the scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz. But the Metatron has no time for them and dismisses them. (Lord I talk about this moment a lot)

Ah, just him and Aziraphale now (not really) and they need to have a chinwag

Chinwag - around the 1870s

In response to Aziraphale saying he has made his position quite clear he offers him the coffee - which we know is not something Aziraphale prefers to drink - he offers another option that Aziraphale would not normally take, foreshadowing much?

well I say offered but really it’s kinda shoved in his face.

He separates Aziraphale and Crowley - leaving Crowley behind with a glare and ominous music which really is the first blatant instance of us knowing that the something that is up - is bad

and guess who enters the bookshop - Maggie and Nina here to talk about relationships and interference - convenient timing almost like it was influenced by someone

We join back with the Metatron when he is telling Aziraphale he doesn’t have to make a decision yet and to go tell his friend the good news and then he blends back into the crowd to walk to Muriel at the coffee shop and encourages them to read books. He proceeds to stand up and look into the bookshop, watching

Now the bits of conversation we see from Aziraphale- I see this as a few possible different things

this is the actual conversation and Aziraphale is telling Crowley an edited version

this is the edited version that he is telling Crowley and something else happened

he didn’t edit it and this is actually what happened and what was told to Crowley

but all I know is we didn’t see this full conversation and it reminded me of the misunderstanding conversation between the Nuns last season - either way it's what we got to work with people

Before moving on there are a couple particular sentences I want to point out from this conversation - and I will get to these later

"It's why Gabriel came to you in the first place, I imagine. There are huge plans afoot, enormous projects, and I will need you to run them.”

"Yeah, I've been looking back over a number of your previous exploits, and I see that in quite a few of them you formed a de facto partnership with the demon, Crowley. Now, if you wanted to work with him again, that might be considered irregular, but it would certainly be within your jurisdiction to restore your friend, Crowley, to full angelic status”

The Aftermath

Upon entering the bookshop and getting Aziraphale to say what they both already know happened out loud - he immediately chimes in with the rhetoric of “this is how Crowley always was, he chose this and his actions are his own doing - you Aziraphale are making the right choice here, you can’t change those who don’t want to, those who are damned”

congratulations Metatron you got what you wanted - pls this is sarcastic I’m still salty

Now that he has basically taken care of everything in his way of getting Aziraphale to come with him - he asks if he is ready to go (at no point yet has Aziraphale actually said yes) and asks if he needs to bring anything with him, a dig and a probe to see if there is anything else. He then just starts walking, not waiting for Aziraphale - a manipulation tactic to pull him along

and on the walk to the lift and in waiting keeps giving Aziraphale praise and then finally revealing The Second Coming as he gets in the lift which makes Aziraphale have to choose - it’s the final one and he still has to make it seem as though he actually had a choice.

But what does this all mean? What was the point of doing all this? Why does he need Aziraphale?? What’s with the word choices?

What’s with your funny words, Magic Man?

some of the dates might have rang a little familiar - Shakespeare? the 1860s? Mary Poppins? They are all around the times Aziraphale and Crowley were meeting up - well duh they’ve been meeting up since practically forever

the Mary Poppins one you could look at two ways - the actual time period they were being released, which would have been the 1941 or 1967 dates, or the fact that Crowley inspired his Nanny look after her

Looking at past exploits indeed you were Metatron, or perhaps you were even there hmmmm…

EDIT

The Metatron just used words that are from some important times,

1601 - discussing their arrangement (them working together)

1862 - their holy water fight and then not talking to each other

1967 (or 1941) - they start working and meeting up again and the holy water disagreement is put to rest.

and then he eventually hits him with, "if you wanted to work with him again”

which interestingly enough seems to hit the insecurities that Aziraphale expressed in the coffee shop, on the head - that loss of structure and purpose.

Aziraphale and Crowley also just did some big moves on their own in the bookshop and heaven - ones they weren't working together on. “You came back” is starting to hit even harder

End Edit

But also The Metatron put emphasis on the word friend when referring to Crowley, for the most part he referred to him as “demon” until then, until he pulled his final card - such an interesting word that had such an impact on Aziraphale in 1941 - well played Metatron well played (I hate it)

Now this could have all been a coincidence - if Aziraphale hadn’t picked up on the same thing.

When he interrupts Crowley he says something along the lines, “what’s that lovely human expression, hold that thought”

Hold that thought - came into play around the 70s through 90s and gained popularity due to the rise of broadcast television, like the News. But there is one definition I want to point out as well - “Used to acknowledge that one's attention needs to be diverted from what a speaker was saying.”

or in other words, “remember all those human expressions the Metatron was saying, yeah those have meaning and so does the one I’m about to say - we are being watched don’t pay attention to my words” but well we aren’t gonna talk about it (pls I’m still coping)

The Metatron has certainly done his research - bringing up words and phrases from important times in their relationship - and The Metatron is certainly watching just like he was now

Why does he need Aziraphale?

Now if you remember back when I discussed who The Metatron was in scripture there is actually an interesting overlap between these two with Tree of Knowledge and The Tree of Life - The Beginning and The End. Aziraphale was always meant to have a special part in The Second Coming for the exact reasons The Metatron said - an angel of his talents, an angel who knows about humans - the angel that guards them

But even just ignoring all that - What literally just happened before he showed up

called for Heaven’s help in a time of trouble - the portal

discoporated a fuck ton of demons

declared War on Hell

took charge and was a mediator between Heaven and Hell

and he did this all on his own (I really doubt he counts Maggie and Nina)

Aziraphale did exactly what Heaven had planned - what Gabriel was meant to sign off on - he started back up the plan he put on pause with Crowley - he made that first move

but also the 25 Lazarii miracle - which set off alarms in Heaven - and the Halo - which also set off alarms in Heaven. That’s twice in one week. One would imagine The Metatron would take notice.

EDIT

Let's switch gears a little and talk about why The Metatron mentions Gabriel coming to Aziraphale in their little talk

Whatever other reason Gabriel may have had for going to Aziraphale, giving him something etc., it was all done under a baseline understanding.

That Aziraphale would get it, be a safe space with an understanding that they don't want everything to end for some similar reasons (their demon partners) - and Aziraphale did help him despite not knowing this exact baseline

He helped the Supreme Archangel hide from Heaven and escape punishment - who’s to say he wouldn't help other angels?

The reason The Metatron doesn't care about Gabriel and Beelzebub running off together is because they went off

Their relationship doesn't have the same level of connection to Earth and humans as Aziraphale and Crowley - they didn't want Armageddon to happen because they wanted to keep seeing each other, the Earth part was optional - a matter of circumstance as it was the easiest place to keep seeing each other. Now that they were gone and together - his reason for objecting is practically void.

That is not the same as Aziraphale and Crowley

But also it works in the Metatron favor - Beelzebub is out of Hell. The Grand Duke of Hell just up and left the same time Heaven is getting their replacement Supreme Archangel - it's now time for Hell to be in shambles.

All while The Metatron just came to snipped away the bud - that seed of safety on Earth if another Angel decided to go against Heaven’s plan.

If he gets the angel that put a stop to Armageddon- that chose the Earth over Heaven - that protected his executioner just at the hint he was on the run from Heaven. If he brought that angel back to Heaven he would not be able to be that anymore, do those things anymore - not with being closely monitored anyway. Keep your enemy close and all that.

And he pulled out all the stops to achieve this - the clothes, the words, the coffee

End Edit

But The Metatron also still needs the Bookshop for some reason - a bookshop he left in the care of an angel he just encouraged to read

So he gets the best of both worlds - The rogue angel back under his thumb and an angel that will listen to him going through the bookshop

What does this all mean? What’s the point?

Well he’s an angel in dark, an angel in reverse

When we went over the tarot cards he’s been linked to, but especially the King of Cups, he seems to represent the reverse side of them while trying to maintain the upright version- which is interesting

He’s an angel in trouble, an angel who needs a scapegoat

The Archangel Metatron is a controversial angel, his existence, his story, his position of power. He even has a story under his name where he is punished and demoted by God when someone assumes him to be another God in Heaven

The Metatron as a character that likes to be surrounded by fours, covered on all sides. And each and every one of those angels has done something to get them in trouble - meaning he has dirt.

After all every scribe needs their soldiers - however backhanded it is

and maybe he has something big he is hiding of his own - using the others faults to hide his - something concerning the Book of Life - either him not having it or at least not having all of it

But anyway he has set himself up to be protected from any fallout - he has not been seen, only heard for centuries probably. Sending angels in his place to do jobs (yes, I’m talking about the change to Gabriel being the one at the airbase - I’m giving it a reason)

Until now - until he walked into that bookshop and made himself known. He put himself in play thinking he knows the game, thinking he just brought in the perfect angel to blame things on if they all go wrong(which they will)

but really he just opened himself up to the start of his downfall. Double edged sword and all that

For the next season I imagine he is going to keep up the pleasantries, take up that backseat role, act as a guide, being subtle in his manipulations - he after all believes he got away with it - just all those things until it all comes crumbling down and he gets exposed, and at the center of it all is Aziraphale (and then Aziraphale gets offered his position which he turns down, saying no to Heaven and choosing to be with Crowley) what? I said nothing.

(I think that’d be funny and this is a comedy after all)

It’s the Punishment of an Angel, the Fall of a King

————————————————————————

and that’s all folks - that’s the end- for now. Hope you’ve enjoyed -I had to watch the final 15 so many times and I’m totally ok

#good omens #good omens 2 #the metatron #metatron #aziraphale #crowley #good omens meta #good omens analysis #good omens character analysis #good omens theory #good omens metatron #maggie and nina

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