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dnvrsmedia · 2 years

Note

Can I request a Nat x r where r uses the strap for the first time with Nat and being insecure they won’t satisfy Nat like Bruce or other her past lovers but Nat reassures r and then r makes Nat cum like she never has before? Please and thank you❤️❤️

Love On Me

Needy!Nat x reader

18+ MDNI

an: tysm for this request! so sorry for it being late but as I mentioned before I am still settling in at uni! I really enjoyed writing & i hope you enjoy reading just as much <3

Frantic movements and clashing teeth quicken with fervor as Natasha grinds on top of your lap. Needy groans slip past her lips as she tries to pull your bodies impossibly closer. You separate from her lips and smirk at the whine that leaves her lips. Her plump lips chase yours with a frown as you back away. If you weren’t immensely horny you would think it was cute.

“What’s gotten into you? Hmm?” You ask sweetly as you tuck a piece of her fiery hair behind her ear. Her breath heaves as she tries to pounce. You can’t help but giggle at her eagerness. You put your palm on her sternum and press lightly. Nat’s face flushed as she is forced to use her words.

“I need you so bad, honey.” She whines and presses her soft pillows on your jaw, biting slightly. You let out a groan and almost instinctively grab her hips.

“I need you to use the strap on me, please. Need you to fill me up good!” She seductively bites and moans into your ear.

A shiver runs down your back. Natasha who is the more experienced and dominant one in your relationship is now practically falling apart for you. You would be stupid if you didn’t race at the chance to have this beautiful woman at your beck and call. Yet, all you can think about is if you’ll ever equate to the partners shes previously had. Nat was your first, and hopefully your last. She showed you the ropes in terms of your sexuality and you are terrified of being a disappointment. The need to make her feel like the most special woman on earth runs deep in everything you do.

Nat notices your hesitation. You’ll never speak it out loud, but having a spy girlfriend who is trained in all things non verbal communication doesn’t really make hiding things easy.

Natasha moves her hands to rest at the nape if your neck, forcing you to look into her eyes.

“Detka, what’s the matter?”

You shake your head and move to kiss her. Your unsuccessful attempt at skipping this conversation quickly ended when Natasha disconnected your lips from hers. Tasha took your hands in her own as she stared deep in your eyes.

“I am immensely needy right now but we are not doing anything until I know what’s going on.” Nat sweetly kisses you cheek and caresses your hand. You know that you’ll forever and always be safe with Nat.

“I want to do this, fuck. You have no idea how much I want this-“

“But?” Nat looks very vulnerable right now. This is what you didn’t want in the first place. Nat opened up about her previous experiences early on in your sexual relationship. Her vulnerability didn’t come easy and yet here you are with her. You shake your head profusely and take a deep breath.

“What if i’m not enough? What if I can’t make you feel as good as you make me feel?”

Natasha shook her head with a warm glint in her eyes.

“Oh detka…” She shakes her head and kisses you passionately and pushes you back onto the bed. She seductively trails her teeth up your neck until she reaches your ear.

“You’re gonna put on the strap and you’re gonna fuck me. You’re gonna make me cum and have my legs shaking. You’d like that, hmm? Splitting me in half with your cock. Cus I need that so fucking bad, please. Just please I need you so bad!”

You let out an almost animalistic growl. Need is seeping out of your pores as Nat grinds her hot cunt onto your thigh. You don’t know what came over you but you gain all the confidence in the world. You flip Natasha onto her back and place your knee in between her heat. She lets out a whiny moan, desperate for more.

“God you’re so pretty for me. I need to fill you up right now, need to fuck you till you can’t remember your name.” You pull off her clothing in a hurry. Your mouth latches onto her over sensitive nipples. Her back arches closer to you as her hands snake to the nape of your neck and tug.

“Please!” She whimpers hotly. You smirk at just how needy she is. Her state makes you want to make her feel the best you can.

“Don’t you worry, pretty girl. I’m gonna make you feel so good.” You whisper in her ear before you move away from her and get yourself situated. The look of pure lust on her face as you strip in front of her. You do struggle with putting on the strap for a bit. Natasha gets on her knees in front of you to help with the harness. Your breath leaves your body for a moment when she takes the faux cock into her mouth while maintaining eye contact.

You can’t help but thrust your hips into her wet and inviting mouth. The feeling of the strap nuzzling up against your clit as she sloppily blows you feels euphoric. You don’t know how much longer you can wait. You need to be in her; splitting her in half. You remove her from your strap and push her onto the bed. You take the strap between your hand and tease her clit.

Nat moans out loudly wantonly as she begs for more. Her hands snake down to your hand i hopes to speed things up. You tsk as you continue teasing her. Being the more dominant one doesn’t happen very often, so you are enjoying all of your time. Her whines grow louder as time goes on. Her sopping cunt drips on to the silk sheets with no remorse. Your mouth opens in awe at how worked up she is.

“Shh, baby” You coo, “I’m gonna make you feel so good.” You give her one last bruising kiss before you slide your strap fully. Something comes over you as you pound into Natasha. You get drunk off her loud moans and whimpers as you thrust deep into her. The only thing on you mind is how much you need to make her cum. You have turned Nat into a babbling mess. Her hair is thrashed about on the pillow and drool slides out from her mouth onto the bed below.

“Hmm, fuck I- hmph please! So good y/n! please baby please need it so bad.” She slurs as he eyes struggle to maintain eye contact. You’re grunting into her due to the sensation of the strap snugly grinding into you. As Nat lets out a wonton moan, you start to struggle with the strap. She’s clenching so tight that you knew it was almost time for her to cum. Your hand slides down her body and lays purchase on her swollen bundle of nerves. Your fingers rigorously massage her clit as your thrusts don’t let up. Natasha cannot form sensical sentences at this point. Her body is thrashing and fingers grip onto whatever she can get her hands on to brace her. You’re basically drooling at this point. You can feel your own orgasm sneaking up on you as you watch the woman you love fall apart under you.

“Fuck, baby you’re doing so good for me. I wanna come together.” You groan at the sight of her bucking her hips into you. “Can you do that, hmm?” She nods and you kiss her forehead. Your thrusting continues as the familiar feeling starts growing stronger. Your thrusts falter the closer you get.

“Baby I need you to cum for me, okay? I can’t last much longer I need you to cum. Come one princess, come for me.” You begged as you couldn’t hold your orgasm back any longer.

Seeing you fall apart from pleasing Natasha was the last nail in the coffin for her. Guttural moans surfaced from her as she came underneath you. She was blissed out to notice the rushing fountain that was expelled between her legs. You looked in awe at the beauty in front of you.

Your thrusts slow to a complete stop. The only noise in the room is the sound of your labored breaths. You slowly remove the strap from inside of your lover. Her quiet whine at the feeling of being empty is heard. You lean down and lovingly kiss her. Slow and sensual is the name of the game and you want to make her feel loved.

Natasha snaps back into reality with a lazy smile and a peck to your wrist.

“Hi baby.” She smirks while playing with your hair. You grow back to your shy self as you’re unable to maintain eye contact with your lover. You face plant into the crevasse of her neck and shoulder with a groan. Natasha let’s put a hearty laugh at you.

“You just gave me the best sex of my life and now you’re all shy? You are ridiculous.” She giggles and you groan once more.

You both will definitely be doing this again.

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good-griief · 11 months

Note

Hey! I was wondering if I could request for Van Palmer? Something along the lines of the reader coming to terms with their sexuality?

It’s totally cool if you don’t want to write this request lol also kinda might start sending in asks so im gonna claim am emoji -🍾

sorry this took so long but i'm back and able to write again so here u go! this was getting very long so if u guys like it i'll happily make a part two!!<3

You were never a “talkative kid.” You were never one that could spell words like gargantuan or manganimus. You were never helping with your classmates’ homework or told you were exemplary. Your grades were average; A’s and B’s, but nothing exemplary.

Though there was one thing you were exemplary at. One thing that if given the chance to write about, you’d always be given the highest score. One single thing, completely apart from the rest that could get you an award for your writing.

Funnily enough. It was Soccer. You’d gotten an award for writing about soccer.

You always liked Soccer. Ever since you were little. You liked playing with your friends, hanging out with them. You liked the hugs that came after a big win, the friendships, the relationships. You liked the team bonding. You liked the sleepovers and parties. You liked getting close with the best of the girls because you were also one of the best. You liked the small, intimate group you had, and the small, intimate time you spent together.

You liked the times where you would have a sleepover and cuddle with one another. Sleepovers where you would kiss to ‘practice’ for boys. Sleepovers that got you so close you were hugging and leaning on each other all the time, lying your head in each other’s laps.

Sleepovers that somehow dwindled down to you and one other girl by eighth grade. A girl that you’d kiss to practice for boys that didn’t exist. A girl you held hands with at school and took to lunch on weekends with each other’s babysitting money.

A girl that moved away before highschool.

You started freshman year without friends, signing up for soccer tryouts and hoping that would get you somewhere.

You ended up on JV and it seemed the rising sophomore class had already gotten so close that your effort to make friends in soccer proved less than fruitful.

When you played scrimmages against varsity, the group hardly passed to you and kept it within their small circle.

There were two girls, Mari and Akilah, who you got along fine with, but they weren’t close, so you had to talk to one or the other during practice which meant you weren’t close with them either.

That left you in your own little bubble freshman year, floating around. No one really disliked you, but no one knew you either. Not even your own teammates.

Luckily, though, around winter break, you were asked out. You didn’t really know the guy, but Jackie, one of the sophomores in his grade and on the Soccer team, said he was nice.

So you said yes.

And suddenly after a winter break of calling this guy and getting hot chocolate with him, you were in with Jackie… Which meant you were in with Shauna, which meant the ball was passed to you, which meant they started to see how good you were, which meant they started to like you.

“Hey!” Jackie came up to you, Mari, and Akilah after practice.

You’d slowly been getting them closer so the three of you could hang out. You figured you could then start passing to them and get them in with the other girls without a whistle-blow from Coach Scott for changing a play.

“You three wanna come with us? Team bonding?”

“Sure!” You said first, all too enthusiastic and making her chuckle.

“I have to study,” Akilah said.

“Yeah, same,” Mari said, giving you a sympathetic smile. “Have fun, though!”

“Oh, we will!” Jackie looped her arm through yours as you gave your new friends a look. “Come on. You can tell me all about Mark— he’s friends with Jeff, you know?”

“Jeff?”

“My boyfriend.”

“Oh…”

“Oh, good! You brought her!” Nat, another sophomore, said.

“I told you the other two would say no.” Jackie shrugged.

“Still nice to ask everyone,” Lottie, the only one that’d actually introduced herself to you, said. She also gave you everyone else’s name. Which was helpful since they definitely weren’t going to introduce themselves.

“Hey,” except maybe one of them, She was shorter, redheaded, and the goalie. She gave you a sweet smile as she held out her hand. “Have you met everyone?”

You took her warm hand, shaking gently and earning even more of a smile. “Lottie,” you gestured to the brunette with your free hand, “told me about everyone.” She only nodded. “Vanessa? Right?”

“My friends call me Van.” You nodded, giving a small smile as you still mindlessly shook her hand. “You can call me Van,” she added with a smirking laugh, eyes darting to Lottie briefly. She had a feeling she told you her name was Vanessa on purpose.

The brunette was grinning from ear to ear, hands slapping at Nat’s as they both laughed together.

“Van.” You dropped her hand. “I’ll remember that.”

“Oh, I hope so—”

“Leave her alone,” Taissa butted in, laughing. “You can ride with us if you want.”

“Sure.” You agreed, walking next to Van as the group dispersed. “Where are we going?”

“I think Jackie’s,” she said. “She’s been dying to meet you and shit now that you're dating Mark.” You nodded. “Whole team has, really. You know, you’re pretty good?”

“Thanks, I think?” You frowned. “I’ve played since I was, like, eight.” She nodded along. “You guys are great. I mean, you’re the best high school team I've seen— Van, I’ve never seen a better goalie.” She smiled, shaking her head. “No, seriously,” you insisted when she went to object. “You must, like, study every player or something—“

“She does,” Taissa said.

You were glad you were usually on her team during JV scrimmage, or it’d be a challenge to get a goal.

“Insane.” You shook your head. “I can only ever tell if someone’s injured.”

“Oh, really?” Van asked, curious.

“Mhm. It’s pretty easy.” She frowned. “Just check the bench. Works every time.” Taissa stifled a laugh, Van laughing out loud.

“I thought you were serious,” she laughed.

“Yeah I could tell. You were all…” You imitated her face, making Taisa laugh.

“Come on, Tai!” Van hit her shoulder. “You’re supposed to be on my side!”

The ride to Jackie’s was spent receiving questions from Tai as Van just listened in or responded to something Tai said.

There was something about this girl. The way she spoke. The way she looked at you through the rearview mirror, checking to make sure you were comfortable. She was sweet, obviously, but there was something else. Maybe, it was just the fact that she was pretty and red-haired, but something about her was all too attractive.

In the sense that you wanted to be her friend, of course.

By the time you got to Jackie’s, the other girls were already there and inside while her parents ordered food for all of you.

They greeted you from the kitchen at the opposite end of the giant house and told you the girls were “in the parlor”.

“You’ll get used to it,” Van said, walking with you to the living room, which was one of many but clearly the most casual of them.

“Hi!” Jackie was quick to pull you by her.

The night was spent getting interrogated, practically, about your boyfriend while you ate pizza and watched shitty movies until people started falling asleep.

You were up late with Van, who, like you, seemed to enjoy the shitty movie on screen. She grabbed the two of you a board game to play while you watched.

“So, do you wanna tell me about yourself at all?” She laughed. “I know more about Mark than my new teammate now.”

“Wasn’t really prepared for that one,” you joked, making her chuckle as you took your turn. “Well, all my old soccer friends are at different high schools now,” you said, shrugging. “So if you’re wondering—“

“Why you seem like such a loner?” She interrupted, making you laugh. “I was a little curious.”

“Jeez,” you laughed. “My best friend moved, like, across the country, and the rest of my friends are on rival teams now… And I’ve beat them all—“

“Fuck yeah, you have!” She laughed.

You spent most of the night talking with Van, who seemed to have been waiting to talk to you alone. She hardly spoke in the group conversation, but now she was lively and engaged. Maybe it was because the conversation had less to do with your boyfriend, and more to do with you. Maybe because she actually got to know you. You couldn’t tell.

There was just something about her.

At the next practice, you were getting the ball passed to you regularly, but never close enough to score.

Maybe because the one time you tried, Van blocked it like it was nothing, but that was weeks ago.

Which meant you were determined to best her now.

When Tai passed you the ball, you made a move to get it to Akilah. Just as quickly as you passed it, it was stolen by Nat, but Mari got a read on what you were trying to do and got it back.

��Mari!” Tai waved, but she quickly passed it to Akilah now that no one was guarding her.

She passed the ball to you, and as quickly as you got it you were kicking it at the goal without moving from your spot.

“Ah, fuck,” Van muttered, having been counting on you coming toward her and already moving to the right of the goal. She jumped toward the left to block, but the ball barely brushed her fingers before getting caught in the net.

“Yes!” Mari yelled, high fiving both you and Akilah when they made their way to you. “That was clean!”

“It was sloppy,” Tai said, coming up to the three of you as the rest of your mock team came as well. “Just unexpected.”

You nodded in agreement. “A goal is a goal, though.” She narrowed her eyes, huffing a laugh. “That kinda unexpected sloppiness can win a game.”

“She’s not wrong.” Jackie patted your shoulder. “Nice shot.”

“Well, why don’t we add it to the playbook?” Tai said. “Test it out in a real game.”

“Oh, don’t be bitter, Taissa.” Jackie laughed. “She just wanted you to pass the ball to her.” Tai laughed at that.

For the rest of the practice, you made sure to pass to Tai every so often, the two of you testing out new plays.

Despite that, Van was determined to block every one of your shots.

More so than anyone else.

It was to the point that after that one goal, you didn’t score another.

“Good game today,” Van said in the locker room, hand on your hip as she moved behind you to get to her locker. “You were making me nervous.”

“Me?” You laughed. “You were pissing me off—“ Van cut you off with a loud laugh. “I only got one goal!”

“It was hard to make that happen!” She laughed, and once it died down, she spoke up again. “Do you think you’d want to come to the field early sometime? Practice with me?”

You smiled, nodding. “Of course!” It was the perfect opportunity to get closer with her. Maybe, know more about her.

To become better friends, of course.

The first time was that weekend. You came the Sunday after practice, practicing earlier in the morning and getting lunch afterward.

It slowly became a habit; every once in a while, every other week, weekly…

“Here.” Van jogged over to you as you stood in front of the ball. “You obviously have to turn your hips, but you really give yourself away…” She held out her hands, brows raised. You nodded and her hands went to your hips to readjust. “This is what you’re doing.” She turned you to the right. “So, I always know you’re going left, but…” She turned you to a slight angle, facing the right corner of the goal. You looked back at her and she couldn’t bring herself to get the rest of her sentence out. “I’m not sure how to explain it,” she said, taking a step back. “Why don’t you try goalie for a minute?”

“I’m a shit goalie, Van.” She laughed at that, but you went anyway.

“Just try and figure out which way I’m going,” she said.

That day, you spent the entirety of it ogether. It was past lunch by the time you went to the locker room to change, talking the whole way there about your newfound knowledge.

“Do you wanna get dinner?” You suddenly suggested, both of you in the midst of changing. “We could, like, go out or something?”

She paused, looking over at you as she got her shirt on. “Where do you wanna go?”

You shrugged. “Mark took me to this little diner a few blocks from my place last weekend,” you said and her mood seemed to dampen. “They have everything— it’s, well… Well, it’s not amazing, but it’s cute.”

“Um…” She took a moment, putting on her shoes and taking down her hair. “I’m kind of tired—“

“Oh—“

“Yeah—“

“That’s okay—! No, I mean, that makes sense. We’ve been here all day, so…” You nodded as you got your pants on and slipped on your shoes. “Maybe another time, then?”

“Totally.” She nodded, giving a smile despite the sudden awkwardness that came between you.

“Okay.” You nodded. “Then, I’ll see you tomorrow—“

“Wait, let me drive you home. It’s late—“

“No, no, no. It’s totally fine!” You gave her a smile as you grabbed your bag. “Mark was going to pick me up, anyway—“

“Oh, did you want to get dinner with him? Like, us three?” You shook your head. “But he’s picking you up,” she said, smirking with a furled brow.

“I would’ve just told him to go home, or hang out with Jeff and Randy, or something.” You shrugged. Her smile widened slightly, cheeks heating. “That’s kinda shitty, though, I guess.” She then laughed. “Next time we’ll, like, plan, or something.”

“Definitely.” She nodded. “And I’ll take you somewhere nicer than a hole-in-the-wall diner after practice, alright?”

Something about the way she said it made you smile, stomach fluttering. “Alright.”

She walked with you out of the dressing room and to your boyfriend's car. “See you tomorrow?” She said some ways away from the jeep he drove.

You nodded and leaned in for a hug, arms going around her shoulders. She was stunned for a moment, having not realized what you were actually leaning in for. She gave you a quick hug back before pulling away to go to her car.

The next day, she was talking to you in the halls, the next practice you were able to get more than one goal, and the next weekend your practice was spent laughing together in the field and dribbling the ball between one another rather than practicing.

“Oh shit!” Van laughed when it started to rain.

March had come quicker than you expected. You and Van had been hanging out for just over a month now, but it felt like you’d been friends all year.

Within minutes of you grabbing your bags, it was pouring rain and you were running to Van’s car.

“Jesus!” Van groaned as she slammed the door shut behind herself, you doing the same. You threw your bags in the backseat, wiping your faces.

She started the car, already starting her drive back to your house from memory.

“Just park in the garage,” you told her. “You can stay for a while.” You then added, “if you want.”

“Is that fine? Like, with your parents?”

“They’re out of town.” She nodded slowly, pulling into the garage. “I can, like, make us dinner or something,” you offered. “If you like pasta.”

“I love some good spaghetti.”

“Great!” You both laughed. “First, we need to shower, and get this shit in the wash.” You looked down at your damp shirt and shorts.

She turned off the car, and you headed inside. You grabbed both your bags and set them in the laundry room as you went inside, getting off your cleats and socks as well.

“Here.” You filled the silence and led her up the stairs. “My rooms there.” You pointed to the end of the hall. “I’ll use my parents shower… obviously.” Van chuckled at your awkward speech, nodding. “There’s towels and everything in there. You can just take my clothes.”

“You sure?”

You nodded. “Just send your stuff down the shoot.”

You took a quick shower before heading to your room in your towel and getting into pajamas.

You heard Van call your name some minutes later as you lay on your bed. “Close your eyes!” You laughed, covering your eyes. “Are they closed?”

“Yep.” She came in with just a towel. “I totally forgot to bring you clothes—“

“Fuck off.”

“Sorry!” You laughed. “Pajamas are in the bottom drawer.”

That night was spent making shitty pasta and laughing together as you ate in front of the TV you rolled out of your closet. You ended up sleeping in your room, falling asleep to an old movie with dishes on your night and arms around each other.

Since that day, Van had been so much more friendly.

It was almost insinuating.

She would touch you to get past you, tease you about a mistake on the field, sneak up and hug you from behind to scare you in the halls. And when she came over, she was touchy and clingy— not that you weren’t. You were often hugging her or lying your head on her shoulder. Hell, you even danced with her if either of you put on music.

On the field, however, she was awful. During scrimmage, she would go out of her way to make you fuck up. Even if you were on her team. She’d call something, or say something to you during a break that made you fumble the ball.

It was to the point that even her telling you good luck before a game had you flustered.

To the point where you fucked up.

“What the hell?!” Tai yelled at you as you shook your head at yourself. “Get it together—“

The ref blew a whistle for timeout after the other team's score. You groaned, walking over with a frown.

“What’s going on with you?” Ben asked.

“Are you sick?” Misty asked. “Injured?”

There was a small pep talk you had before you were sent back out. Unfortunately, your boyfriend was sitting with your parents as they watched you fuck up one of your last state games. It only made your nerves skyrocket.

“Get it together,” Nat told you, placing a hand on your shoulder as she walked past you.

Van was the last to leave, giving your shoulder a squeeze. “Guess we should’ve kept up our practices, huh?” She joked, earning a glare. “Sorry— Look, you’re good. Really good. You’re just being predictable.” You frowned at her. “Think back on that play you, Mari, and Akilah pulled earlier this year.”

When you got back on the field, you did as Van said. You let Shauna, Tai, and Nat get their goals in, but after that you asked Tai to pass to Akilah, who was heavily guarded.

“What?” She frowned at you. “You’re, like, out of your mind today.”

“Just try?”

As soon as the ball was stolen from Akilah, Mari got it to you, and you back to an unguarded Akilah. When she passed to you, you immediately kicked at the goal.

“YES!” You heard before you even knew what happened.

The buzzer sounded, signifying you’d won and leaving you shocked as your teammates huddled around you, chanting: “BUZZ. BUZZ, BUZZ, BUZZ!”

In the locker room, your excitement continued until you and Van were the last ones there.

“So, I was thinking,” Van spoke up. “What do you think about dinner this Sunday after our usual?”

“Oh, now you’re nice?” You joked.

Maybe it’d been left out that you were completely reciprocal in this teasing game. You would go up to her at her locker to scare her like she did you, and of course hug her and kiss her cheek afterward before you went to class, leaving her flustered and wanting to get back at you by the time practice rolled around. So, maybe, you brought it on yourself.

“Come on,” she laughed. “It’s not my fault I make you nervous.”

“You’re so annoying.” You shook your head. “I almost blew the match because of you.” Her brows shot up. “You were fucking with me before the game with your…” You gentured to her when she looked at you with false confusion. “You know what you were doing.”

She laughed. “Yeah—“

“See!”

“I was just teasing—“

“Well, stop it.”

“But you’re so cute when you’re flustered.” She pouted at you, earning a glare. “Even cuter when you’re mad at me.” She smiled. “Besides, we still won.”

“If we didn’t, they would’ve killed me.” She scoffed. “It’s not funny.”

“You’re actually upset?” She couldn’t help but laugh. “We still have, like, five games—“

“You can’t talk to me before them.” She practically guffawed. “You, like, fuck with with my fucking head. I don’t fucking know.”

“I fuck with your fucking head? What the fuck are you talking about?”

You groaned, turning to grab your bag. “Goodbye, Vanessa.”

“Hey.” She grabbed your hand, turning you around.

When she did, you were closer than she expected.

And that was when it started.

Her eyes fell to your lips before flitting back up to your eyes.

That was when you finally realized what that something about her was.

In the seconds it took you to process when was about to happen, her lips were on yours. Her hand still held yours and as soon as your free one went to her cheek, she tilted her head for a better angle.

You didn’t know how long you were there. You didn’t realize the time passing. You didn’t even know when it was that her hands found your waist and your other found her neck.

But you did realize that the door was opening.

You quickly pushed her back as someone stepped in, Van pretending to have been lacing up her shoes as she sat on the bench.

“Everything okay, babe?” Mark called from the doorway.

“Yeah, sorry. I was just helping Van with this turf burn.”

“Shit, is she okay?” He asked. “Should I get Misty?”

“I’m good!” Van called. “Just couldn’t wrap it myself.”

It took a few more exchanges to get him to leave, but eventually the door shut and you grabbed your things. You went to leave, but stopped yourself and turned around. You placed your hand on her shoulder as you leaned down to kiss her cheek. “Come over after practice tomorrow?”

She looked over at you, brow raised. “Does this mean you’re not mad at me anymore, or…?”

“I’ll think about it.”

When she came over, the two of you went straight to your room to “watch TV.” You locked the door behind you, rolled out your miniature TV and put in a tape, and sat down on the bed with Van.

“Hurry up,” she laughed as she grabbed your hand and pulled you down on top of her.

You never talked about it. You didn’t discuss what was going on. You didn’t even ask what it meant.

You just changed your practices to time together. You’d still practice, but you’d also just sit and talk. You’d make out in the locker room before going to get lunch or dinner. You’d hang out with the team and sneak off to have time alone. You’d even just get together. One of you would call and ask the other to lunch, or to go to the mall, or just to come over. There wasn’t a need for the practice excuse anymore, it was just nice to do that, too.

But you also had to decline at times.

“Mark wanted to take me to the movies,” you told her one night and you could practically feel her mood shift. “Maybe… Maybe I can get him to—“

“No, it’s okay,” she told you quickly. “Spend time with your boyfriend.” The word left a sour tension in the air.

“Van—“

“What time’ll you be home?”

“Hey,” you sighed when she spoke over you. “If you want me to, I’ll… I can tell him, but I don’t think—“

“You’re going to tell him you’re cheating on him with your best friend?” She asked, tone disbelieving. “No way.”

“Tell him I want to break up,” you clarified. She was quiet for a moment. “And… We’re not cheating.”

“We’re hooking up,” she deadpanned.

“But…” You pursed your lips. “There’s no possibility of us… being an us, is there?” Your hopeful question, despite how poorly it came out, was met with another beat of quiet from her end, but she didn’t say anything that time. “I just mean… There isn't a way we could actually be together— at least, not in a real way—“

“In a real way?” She scoffed a laugh as she often did when you misused and fumbled over your words. “Have I been imagining all this, or—?”

“That’s not what I mean.” You pinched the bridge of your nose as you started to get frustrated; mostly with yourself and your horrible articulation. “Publicly. Like, I’d never cheat with Randy or Jeff.” She cursed your name, laughing in disbelief as she listened to you try to justify what you’d said instead of taking it back. “This… You and me, is it really going anywhere? Because, if it’s just ‘hooking up’, we could never really be anything, you know? And that sucks, but it’s also, I don’t know, it’s, like, better—?“

“So, let me get this right… You think it's better that you’re with me, because if you were cheating with a guy, it’d actually be real— or no, there’d be a possibility of an actual relationship.” You pursed your lips at the tone of her voice, knowing how awful it sounded. “Is that right?”

“Not exactly.” She hummed, waiting for you to explain. “It’s more like… I’m scared of what people might—“

“I don’t wanna be with someone that’s scared of what people think—“

“Just let me talk.” You sighed, feeling your eyes sting. You’d never been good at articulating your feelings, especially not in this kind of situation. “I’m scared of what people might do because of what they think. It’s just… It’s better if it doesn’t look like we’re anything more than friends—“

“Okay, I’m gonna get off the phone—“

“Van—“

“No— Look… I see where you’re coming from, just… I know that’s not the reason you said it in the first place.” You didn’t argue, nodding despite the fact that she couldn’t see it. “If you want to, I’ll come over when you get home—“

“Okay,” you said all too quickly. “I’ll be home in two hours.” There was a long pause. “If you want to come.”

“Alright.” Click.

She came by that night, but when you tried to talk to her and smooth things over, she was short.

“Look,” she said. “I like you. I’m comfortable saying that.” You immediately shut your mouth and listened to what she had to say. “If you’re not comfortable admitting you don’t like guys. Or that you’re using your ‘boyfriend’ as a fucking beard, because you want me, that’s fine. I don’t care. I probably already knew that.” You nodded along. “But I don’t want to talk about it with you, because hearing you say it? That fucking hurt.”

“I’m sorry.” Van shook her head, dismissing it. “I really am afraid of what someone might do…”

“It’s not like I’d let anyone do anything to you,” she said, eyes narrowed.

“That’s not what I mean.” She sighed, waiting for you to explain. “I’m really not saying anything right in this conversation, I just… My point was that I’d leave him for you, and I was trying to ask you if, maybe, this could be more than this, because I don’t think you want me as more than a friend, so when I say ‘in a real way’ I mean, as more than…” You trailed off, narrowing your eyes at the bedsheets when you began to repeat yourself. “And… I wouldn’t cheat with a guy because—“

“Because you like girls?”

You looked up at her, lips pursed. “Why won't you answer my question?”

She tilted her head. “If we get together,” she started, “and I mean, actually get together. Not go to the mall and meet up at a store. Things are going to change. People will catch on, and they’ll treat you differently. I’m sure you know that, but I don’t think you’re ready for it. Especially not when you can’t even admit how you feel.” There was a long pause, her lips pursing. “Just stay where you’re safe,” she told you. “Stay with Mark. We can keep doing this— I like doing this— and you’re probably right. It’s probably better if people just think we’re friends, so…” She looked over at you, obviously still frustrated. “Why don’t we just move on?”

“Okay.”

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peteypiessuperfamily · 4 months

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Steve's been looking for the right dance partner since the 40's, Tony has years of formal dance classes from his childhood under his belt. Tony doesn't go into it expecting to be anything more than a teacher and Steve doesn't go in expecting to be anything more than a student with two left feet. It's just for the gala right?

Then the gala ends but their "lessons" don't. But hey! There's nothing gay about two grown men dancing together to romantic songs a couple days a week at set times. Nothing at all.

It takes Natasha walking in on them slow dancing weeks after the gala for them to use a single one of their braincells

#when she walks in somethin stupid is playing #as it should be #sinatra is just very steve what can I say #i hc that nat doesnt even say anything #she probably just raises an eyebrow and leaves #and thats all it takes #stony #stevetony #tony stark #steve rogers #superhusbands #guy I might write a fic

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jadedjean · 8 months

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some of my lottie matthews hcs

been writing lottienat and doing a concerning amount of thinking about their characters so here you go:

friends with tai and van precrash. also knows about tai and van. Tai told her first and she pretended she didn’t know when van told her. she knows that they aren’t talking about it and doesn’t want to get in the middle

is kind of a loner. she doesn’t have a lot of friends and anyone she is friends with it’s sort of surface level

lesbian (obviously)

has a crush on Nat that no one knows about

hosts and pays for all the team events because her dad likes to throw money at her instead of parenting

let’s jackie plan all the team bonding type things at her house because she knows how much jackie likes doing that stuff

started hosting parties because one of the yellowjackets only nights got turned into something bigger and her parents are never home

tries to start conversations with Nat at school but gets weird about it every time and comes off as a bitch

uses soccer as an outlet for all her feelings

is super polite to service workers because she sees how her dad acts and is humiliated by it.

does everything out of genuine kindness and understanding

has an excellent gaydar with everyone except nat, who she’s convinced is straight. knew about taivan before they told her. knows about coach ben. she’s pretty sure there’s something going on between jackie and shauna too.

if they hadn’t crashed in 1996 would’ve loved buffy (her fav characters would’ve been faith and tara btw)

was super drunk at a party at her house in junior year and went to bum a cigarette off nat, complemented her hair, found out she cuts it herself, and then promptly forced nat into her bathroom to cut her bangs.

she absolutely worships nat. she agrees with her in arguments. runs after her when she storms off. defends her when people are being shitty, especially when she’s not around to defend herself. she thinks the absolute world of nat.

finds excuses to hangout with nat at parties (part of why nat knows she doesn’t talk shit unless someone really deserves it)

hasn’t hooked up with anyone. she never went through a phase of thinking she was straight and hasn’t met any other lesbians (besides tai and van)

this isn’t even a fraction of them so lmk if you want me to post them, i have plenty 😭.

#lottie yellowjackets #lottie matthews #lottienat #taissa turner #tai yellowjackets #jackie taylor #shauna shipman #jackieshauna #nat yellowjackets #natalie scatorccio #nat scatorccio #van palmer #yellowjackets #my hcs #lottie matthews headcanons #lottienat headcanons

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hydrngea · 1 year

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how does your detective feel about not being a detective anymore?

#maeve is fucking CARTWHEELING. she’s so glad. fucking hated the station.#plus she may have a change of getting an SUV (which i hc is an escalade) so she’s so happy #(it will hit her in a bit that hee becoming an agent makes adam her direct supervisor.)#hafsa is :/. she loves being detective. she doesn’t want to leave her bestie verda at all.#hafsa doesn’t want to be working with her mom. also doesn’t like the agency so. and she doesn’t get to practice as much science-y stuff #twc #the wayhaven chronicles #adam du mortain #a du mortain #ava du mortain #nate sewell #n sewell #nat sewell #not obx #hydrngea.txt

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natsmagi · 8 months

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sorry for making yet another textpost but i came across that post saying they dislike transfem natsume because he "canonically hates being perceived as a girl and tries to erase all sorts of memories related to that" and also went on to shame genderbends of him aswell. So, as someone who not only draws genderbends of natsume but is myself someone who is nonbinary and hates being perceived as a woman, i thought id offer my two cents

first of all; i think its important to note that natsume does NOT hate his childhood. in fact, hes quite happy that he had such an unusual upbringing!

what natsume hates is being perceived as weak. thats why he was raised as a girl after all, it was his mother trying to protect him from evil spirits. he doesnt hate the whole "-chan" or "wearing dresses" thing because he has a hatred for womanhood, its because due to his upbringing hes now come to associate those things as being weak. he begs tsumugi to forget about it because that means tsumugi remembers natsume being weak, and natsume thinks tsumugi still referring to him as "natsume-chan" means he still sees natsume as weak. (iirc natsume did however once say that he is a little sad that he doesnt really know how to relate to young boys due to this in poltergeist, but i couldnt find the exact quote. either way that just adds to the complexity of natsumes relationship with his childhood, because while he is happy to be "abnormal" in that sense, it has left him lacking in some areas)

i have to ask though, should this conflict of his not be something we hope he overcomes? should we not want him to develop a healthy relationship with various gender expressions? should we not want natsume to overcome his belief that feminine things = weakness? i want natsume to reach a point where he can wear feminine clothing and not feel like some damsel in distress because of it. i want natsumes character to grow. i want him to develop a positive relationship with his gender because natsume DOES enjoy some more typically feminine things, like baking! he used to bake with his mom when he was little! and i want him to feel like he can indulge in that side of him without feeling insecure.....

i LOVE transmasc natsume, my primary hc for him is transmasc nonbinary after all, but with all these things considered, shouldnt people be allowed to headcanon him however they want? if they hear his story and negative relationship with femininity and how that resonates with them and they themselves are transfem, should they not be allowed to hc him as such too?

which brings me to my next point; my own personal relationship with gender and femininity. i was raised as a girl and i fucking DESPISED womanhood. i hated everything about it. i hated how i felt forced into a box i didnt want to be stuck in, and i hated how it felt like my whole life had already been planned out for me due to societal expectations, aswell as me needing to present a certain way. i was peak "tomboy" growing up, constantly wearing super baggy clothes and wouldnt even brush my hair alot of the time. but despite that i remained miserable. i frankly hated how i looked and would constantly dye my hair vibrant colors in an attempt to make me like myself a little more. it wasnt until i realized "wow, im actually not a girl at all" that i finally let go of believing i needed to look a certain way (and thus, defying it) and started to dress for myself. i started to dress in clothes that made me happy and feel pretty! alot of which leans feminine, but clothes doesnt have a gender, and how you dress doesnt define your gender either, but it can still be a bit scary yknow? especially since i dont want people to think of me as a girl, and drawing a bunch of femstars has really made me learn to love myself more in a funny way. i can put these characters in clothes i think are beautiful, i can explore the more feminine parts of me that i adore but dont want to express in public due to how i want others to perceive me, but it has also warmed me up to femininity even more. because femstars to me feels detached from the expectations of society because its not a real thing!! there are no canon femstars designs!!! i can do literally whatever the hell i want with it and its been so liberating to me!!

all this to say; i think it really sucks seeing the way this fandom treats transfem hcs and explicit genderbends, because like ive said before; they can truly be something so personal. you dont know why that person is drawing what theyre drawing, so its a little unwise to make assumptions based on ........ Well, whatever it may be. i know very well that women dressing the way society expects them to SUCKS, esp if you have personal ties to it, but you have to realize the issue isnt femininity, but misogyny.

#maybe ill delete this later idk but i just felt like i needed to say something #as i constantly see these things being spoken of yet never do these people actually reach out to femstarries #and ask Hey why are you doing this?#so instead they make bad faith assumptions and it really sucks.#and while im here;#trans hcs count as genderbends. Because you have changed the characters gender #*IF the org chara is a cisman and you make them a trans woman i should add #once again Stop treating trans and cis people as two separate things #if it was a cisbend itd be CALLED CISBEND #and the reason i tag genderbend is because i know some people dont like it #and thats valid!!! no one is forced to like this kind of stuff!!!#and some people who dont like genderbends might be new to enstars and dont know what femstars is #so should it not still be tagged for those people too?#should we not look out for the trans people who dont wish to see their favs be a different gender???#i dont get it. i really dont #this post probably wont even reach the right audience but wtv #nat rambles #nats enst posting

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