#nam joon x yn
Text
NICE GUYS FINISH LAST // KNJ
you’re still so pretty
+
strangers to friends, friends into lovers, and then.. strangers again?
navi | m. list | ask me! |
pairing:
med student nam joon + med student oc
au/genre:
high school sweethearts to exes to ???
fluff !! slight angst
note: cute little one shot in my drafts… idrk whats going on but it’s giving meet cute vibes!!! enj!
🏷️ permanent taglist: @joonsjuice @taetaecatboy @pb-n-juju @miss-rainy-days @firesighgirl @whoa-jo @vantxx95 @pamzn @kakixaku @casspirit0705 @tae165 @defzcl @sopebubbles @leefics @ggukkieland @bebebutbetter @yoongimentita7 @boraength @era-genius @4ksj @vampcharxter @miss-jupiter @floweryjeons @taegijns @jeonqkooks-main @ellesalazar
One thing people never talk about is the loneliness that comes hand-in-hand with being ambitious.
You lose friends, opportunities, and even love.
Feeling the need to prove the world and others wrong—getting so lost in your strength that you’ve become weak—it’s not a life everyone can live. The exchange of your success came at the cost of having your loved ones as collateral damage.
Kim Nam Joon was exactly that for you.
Though you two didn’t end on a sour note, the memories and possibilities of you and him leaves a bittersweet taste in your tongue. Thinking of him, speaking of him, and missing him comes in waves. Yet, with each memory, you gladly drown.
Others argue that you bloomed late while your parents like to defend you and say you’re too good to settle for anyone less. Your parents, however, kept their mouths shut whenever it came to Nam Joon.
They liked him.
He was practically accepted and assumed to be the one you marry… It’s silly, isn’t it? For parents to see stars in their daughter’s eyes at such a young age and understand why.
From what you can remember, he was a quiet nerd who helped others but was also good at identifying when he was being used. There was a difference. He held your bookbag, dropped you off at class, and always sat with you and your friends at lunch. His friends would tease him about how whipped he was for you and your parents would often bicker about how young you two were to be that inseparable.
So when it ended—because nothing at the age of 17 really lasts—he didn’t know if it was over or if it was truly over. Partly because you didn’t sound cold when you asked for space and the distance that grew between you two had given you both time to accept the inevitable. Still, when it happened it felt utterly confusing. For weeks, he couldn’t help but wonder if you’d changed your mind before the summer ended and went on to your separate ways… In case you changed your mind—if a single ounce of you wanted to give the long-distance a fucking try—he had a plan.
The plan.
Calls are to occur every Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday nights. Calling every night might get tiring, but it’s okay if the calls increase due to missing each other.
Good morning texts every day.
Visiting each other should be done through turn-taking. He’ll go to you first.
Fly home every big holiday.
Shit like that.
He wondered if you would change your mind before he[‘d have to force himself to get over you. Then, he wondered if you would even think about changing your mind at all. Until suddenly, he realizes that you never even asked.
You probably never even thought about him.
You two broke up the summer before University. You both told everyone that your dream schools were at opposite ends of the world. Knowing you both could make it; it was hard for others to disagree. However, Nam Joon began to feel a bit of resentment as the breakup became more and more real. Deciding that long-distance would complicate your study and work schedules was a practical decision—but it was not his.
It was yours.
He’s almost certain that the decision was made out of 80% of logic, 5% out of love, and 15% out of insecurity.
You’ve never failed anything in your life. Perhaps, love is no exception.
As the seasons changed, time flew and the breakup felt like a summernight dream. It slowly became a topic that only popped up once in a while, and when it did, you spoke of it like how it felt. It felt kind and sweet. Like the aftertaste of strawberry milk candies and craving for more, like the way you finish a good book where the characters don’t die and nothing feels tragic, but a part of you wishes you hadn’t reached the end. That, if you could, you would reread the pages as if you never knew a thing. You spoke of your puppy love like how love felt; love felt like him.
The peace you’ve made with your feelings for him suddenly begins to panic as a familiar tall and dimple smile greets you. Cheesy to say, but too difficult to deny—all the memories of him begin to flood your mind as he approaches.
With his heart on his sleeve, he stands before you.
“Long time no see, ___.”
His smile is the same.
The way his lips curve perfectly reminds you of how they felt against your neck. He had that habit—smiling into a kiss that is. His hair is shaved, earning a good laugh from you. You’ve never seen him so… Manly?
“Kim Nam Joon,” you gush. “Wow, it’s been a while.”
Offering your hand, he stares at it and chuckles. His shoulders are much broader now, so his body language is much more noticeable. It suits him.
“Too formal, ___.” Nam Joon laughs, taking your hand and bringing it to his lips. Gently, he places a kiss on your knuckles and squeezes them. To others, this may be forward… To you, it’s just right. He always greeted you like this. A part of your heart is relieved he hasn’t changed that much. “But, yeah... It has been a while. 6 years to be exact!”
“You kept count?” Your eyebrows knit together, teasingly. He gives you a playful irritated look, causing your heart to melt a little.
“You know what I mean… I just—I didn’t know you were back in Korea. You don’t use social media so it’s a little hard to hear anything about you.”
To his dismay, it was difficult to get any news from you. Nam Joon would be lying if he said he hadn’t been asking around about you or if he hadn’t stayed up once in a while attempting to find your name on social media. Your closest friends moved on with their lives and careers; no one had time to reminisce on old high school sweethearts.
Except him.
“I finished my degree and then came back here for this med program. That was my plan, remember? It was always the plan. Nothing has changed,” you confess. “I thought you’d be way further into med school than me. You always talked about getting it done as fast as possible.”
He shrugs. “I took a gap… For like, 2 years and then failed 1 course… Twice.”
In complete shock, you gasp. “Kim Nam Joon… Failed? Twice at that?”
“It was a tough class! I fucking hate Psychology. Why do we even need it in pre-med? Like—”
You burst into tears. Tears of joy. Laughter, really.
“Y-you failed… P-psych? The easiest fucking course in the universe?”
Nam Joon shoots you a glare.
“My prof was crazy.”
“So are you for failing a fucking psych class!”
Nam Joon lets you have your moment. You continue to laugh, having a difficult time believing in his claim. As you continue to make fun, he makes himself comfortable, taking a seat next to you.
“Are we done? Can we please move on?” Nam Joon groans in embarrassment.
Composing yourself, you give in to his wish. “Some things never change, huh? You still make me laugh.”
His eyes soften. “You’re mean for using my failure as your source of joy.”
Then, you laugh again. You hit his shoulder, unable to contain your fun. Then, your eyes widen as your hand makes contact with his body.
Unhinged, you tell him, “Holy shit. You’re huge!”
Nam Joon’s eyes widen and he almost chokes on air.
You turn red.
“Y-you know what I mean!” You shove him playfully. It makes no difference. You barely moved him.
Nam Joon then begins to empty his bag. Taking out his laptop, he explains himself. “Ahhh. I met a few friends who are absolute gym rats. If I’m not studying, I’m at the gym with them.”
Teasingly, you gasp again. “Ohhh? So I have no insane drinking party stories to hear from you?”
Shaking his head with a smug smile, he answers you. “No.. There are definitely some insane drinking party stories for you to hear… Maybe after class? We could grab a cup of coffee and catch up.” He suggests. He isn’t sure what had gotten into him to be so rash, but he missed you. Seeing you again, his body automatically made its way to you.
You nod, feeling a little warm. “Sure! I’ve missed you.”
His heart skips a beat.
He missed you too.
The coffee hangout goes well.
You catch Nam Joon up with everything you’ve been up to. All the friends and people you’ve met abroad and how you finally learned how to ride a bike at the ripe age of twenty. He teases you for learning so late and you nag him about getting his driver’s license. To which, he said he acquired… Just a month ago.
At that moment, he feels like nothing has changed even though so much has.
You were braver.
A lot more confident with your words and posture and Nam Joon was calmer and oddly a little funnier than you remember. Maybe you missed his quirky jokes and random “fun facts.” Whatever it was, it caused you to exchange numbers and constantly be texting back and forth.
Suddenly, two months go by, and he’s back to being your best friend.
You feel like you’re 17 again. Your days with him are filled with late-night study dates and bike rides around his favorite spots on campus. Honestly, you wouldn’t have it any other way. For the first time in a while, you finally felt like you were home.
Finally, he had persuaded you to join him and his friends at the gym. Your AirPods are in and you’re running on the treadmill as Jungkook, Seokjin, and Nam Joon crowd around the weights. Nam Joon is spotting Jungkook. As he lifts the heavyweights, Jungkook strikes the conversation first.
“Are you two getting back together?”
“What?”
“You and ___,” Jungkook grunts as he finishes his rep. “Everyone is assuming so and I want to be the first one with confirmation... Makes me feel special.”
Nam Joon rolls his eyes and turns to check on you. With longing eyes, he assures his friends: “we’re just friends.”
Seokjin pokes his head in and laughs. “Shut up. Being funny is my thing.”
“Seriously!” Nam Joon urges. “Sure, we talk about the past and all but.. Not about us—nothing about us. And.. And I don’t think she wants to? It’s weird… And it’s okay. I rather it is like this than to make things awkward and not have her around anymore.”
Jungkook drops the weights and sighs.
“Ahh! Exactly my point!”
He and Seokjin share a look and bump shoulders with Nam Joon. They’re completely aware of how their friend was looking at the girl he had loved once and can’t help but feel like something about this situation felt unfinished.
“This is fate, you know?” Jungkook insists. “You two were in love and then it wasn’t the right time so you guys broke up. You guys were young back then… It was practical. But, she’s back and you still love her. It’s the right time. Now, this is the part where you try again.”
Nam Joon can’t help but feel like an idiot.
“Fuck off, Kook,” Nam Joon orders. “It’s over. I’m lucky to even just be her friend again. Besides, she probably has a boyfriend.”
Seokjin squints at Nam Joon in disbelief. “... Well, have you even asked her if she’s seeing someone?”
All three boys look dumbfounded.
No one knows what to say.
Would it be weird to ask such a thing? Of course, Nam Joon was curious, but a part of him kind of figured that talking about your current relationship status wouldn’t be the best icebreaker for you two.
“Look man, it doesn’t matter. You’re her ex. Her first boyfriend ever! You have rights.” Jungkook encourages. He picks up his water bottle and begins to chug.
Seokjin hits Jungkook’s stomach mid-gulp. “Rights? Kook, I think that’s for people who have kids and are having difficulty co-parenting—”
“He has rights!” Jungkook defends sternly. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he pats Nam Joon on the back. “Just ask her if she’s seeing someone… If not, ask her out. Try again.”
“What makes you think I want to try again?” Nam Joon scuffs and his two friends roll their eyes.
Jungkook and Seokjin share a look.
“You have been missing her your entire life. She’s back. A few giggles here and there and you ditch us for two months straight… Only to reach out and invite her to our gym to work out with us! No shade, but this is bro time!” Jungkook cries. “Also, you talk about it all the time when you’re 7 shots in. You haven’t had a girlfriend… Since her, right? Just hook-ups and a few flings… But no one is like her and that’s probably why.” Then, Jungkook hits Nam Joon’s head and sighs.
“No one is her.”
The three turn their attention to you. Two guys approach you and begin a conversation. Nam Joon observes and it causes Jungkook and Seokjin to chuckle.
“Time is ticking my friend. Tik tok, tik tok…” Jungkook makes an effort to let out a devious laugh. Nam Joon’s eyes begin to glow green and it satisfies his two friends. “Nice guys finish last… Ex boyfriends finish first!”
Jungkook leans towards Seokjin and whispers: “Looks like someone will be pulling ex-boyfriend card soon.”
With that, Seokjin and Jungkook switch. Seokjin lifts the weights and Jungkook helps to spot him. Nam Joon should look away, but he can’t. His eyes are glued to the way you’re laughing at the two boys who are trying too hard to impress you.
Mid lift, Seokjin teases Jungkook.
“You used the term “bro time,” right? You’re such a fucking loser, Kook.”
Nam Joon felt different though.
He felt like the fucking loser.
Nam Joon doesn’t call or text you as often as he did before.
Since that gym session, he had begun to act a little distant. Like he was trying to set boundaries or something. It felt odd that his actions felt familiar. You felt a little ache in your heart and your head hurt.
The past few weeks have not been easy for Nam Joon as well. He felt like an absolute dick for ignoring your warmth. He tried to excuse it by saying that he was too busy with his assignments and studying. So badly does he want to pull away from you; but it felt draining. He wanted to be near you and the fear of you not wanting him back was definitely taking a toll on him.
It was confusing though.
In the middle of the night, he’d come over once to give back your textbooks in exchange for a few of his hoodies. It didn’t feel real seeing him at midnight. Some nights, he’d come over a little damp from the midnight rain. As you let him into your place, all you can think to yourself is: damn. I think I’m still in love with this man.
So, yes.
It’s been a rough couple of weeks. With each passing day, his presence made you nervous. If his coming over at midnight wasn’t bad enough—it was the 9am’s with him that was worse. It was more about how close you two sat next to each other and how intimate these labs were. With each little moment of fingertips brushing, bumping into each other and him steadying you with his hands on your waist, and the little nose scrunch exchanges—the butterflies in your stomach flutter like crazy.
Fine.
Maybe you did fail once in your life.
You failed to be honest. You failed to fight for him. You failed to be someone to him that stays.
Nam Joon wasn’t having much fun either.
You’ve always been so pretty to him. He especially loved whenever you two had study dates because he could watch you furrow your eyebrows, reread the same sentences, and mumble formulas and concepts to yourself over and over again. If he was lucky, he’d look up at the right time and catch you sighing from frustration. Your puffy cheeks and sleepy eyes made his heart soft and confused. To him, it was enchanting to see you so invested.
Kind of like right now.
As you look into the microscope, he can’t help but feel nervous. He wants to reach out and move your hair to the side. It’s bothering you and he can tell. He wants to do it, but he hesitates.
It would be too much, right? He would be crossing the line—especially since you’re the one that broke things off with him.
His thoughts pause as you pull away and blink at him.
“Oh, shit! I have an interview at a clinic nearby so I can’t stay to help clean up after this. I’m sorry. I should’ve told you before we began—“
“___, it’s okay. Go do your thing. I hope you get it.”
Warmly, you smile at him.
“Thanks, baby—Nam Joon,” you correct yourself, throwing your head back and laughing nervously. In exchange, he stares at you blankly. You clear your throat, trying your best to move past this. “Sorry! For a second, I thought you were my boyfriend again.”
He brushes it off and tells you it’s okay. Again, you go back to looking into the microscope. Focusing on adjusting the lens and pulling away every so often to make notes.
“Me too,” he says softly.
Then, you feel it.
He tucks your hair behind your ears. You pretend like his touch didn’t send electric shocks throughout your body and ignore it. Your cheeks instantly flush a rosy pink and spill your secret.
Nam Joon chuckles, completely in awe of you.
You’re still so pretty to him.
You’re still his.
#bts fic#bts fic rec#bts one shot#nam joon x yn#bts rm#bts rm fic#nam joon x reader#nam joon x oc#bts x oc#nam joon med au#bts med au#nam joon fluff#nam joon imagine#nam joon scenario#namjoon e2l#bts e2l
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Clear (Part 7)
Gwi-nam x f/Reader
indicates a willingness to do anything the snapper wants
Main Masterlist ♡ All Of Us Are Dead Masterlist ♡ Yoon Gwi-nam Masterlist ♡ Jelly Bracelets Masterlist
Just like all my other stories, this has not been proofread, but please enjoy.
Warnings: Some swearing.
Am I late to this fandom? Oh hell, yes, but the show was so good.
Gifs and photos do not belong to me. 1st gif @dramastream 2nd gif @tokumusume
Gwi-nam's POV
When I saw her kiss that little shit right in front of me, I wanted to strangle him, but I knew she was doing that to get back at me and I didn't want to give her to much satisfaction on how seeing her kiss someone else is effecting me.
So I waited until the kiss was done. Once she was done making out with Park Yae-Joon and he was gone, I just looked at her.
"Don't worry, I'll deal with him later. Now, to deal with you." I took one step towards her, and she didn't move. She stood her ground.
"You think you can make me look like a fool in front of everyone here?"
"You do that well enough on your own."
"What the hell did you just say to me?" I asked her calmly. Our faces mere inches apart. Anyone who was in the backyard has gone quiet, watching the two of us.
"You heard me, Gwi-nam."
"The only person who makes me look and act like a fool is you, YN." I said before kissing her. Just like our first kiss.
She reached up between our bodies and placed her hands on my chest to what I can only assume is to push me away, but I held on with one hand and my other hand was placed on the back of her head to hold her there.
I felt her bracelets and just snapped one. At this point, it didn't matter which one. We broke apart, and I held up the snapped bracelet, which was clear.
Indicates a willingness to do anything the snapper wants
"What are you gonna make me do?" YN asked me softly. She saw where we were. Surrounded by our schoolmates.
Even her making out with me has already made her associated with me, but if I made her do anything remotely sexual and it got placed online, she could end up changing schools and I didn't want that.
"Just for tonight, I will be nice, so you will be by my side. Getting me drinks and food. Sitting in my lap. Doing exactly as I say until we leave the party and we will leave the party together. Got that?"
YN'S POV
I listened as he told me what I would be doing, but I knew there would be a catch. There always is with him.
"We will leave the party together. Got that?"
There it is. The moment we leave the party anything and I mean anything could happen.
"Yes."
"Good, let's go back inside. I am thirsty."
◆
I have been his little maid ever since we stepped foot back in the house. He showed me where he would be sitting and I went to get him what he wanted.
I also made sure to grab some snacks as I knew he would be hungry. When I handed or tried to hand them over to him. He just looked at me with one raised eyebrow and he patted his lap.
I sighed and sat down, legs on one side, my body turned towards him as I fed him his snacks. He was talking with his stupid friends who were having a great time making fun of me for being his little bitch.
This is so humiliating, but it couldn't be worse. I have heard how cruel he could be. How Gwi-nam and his friends practically get off being cruel and mean to others.
He has put people in the hospital for just looking at him wrong. In their small bubble, they are rulers of school, and everyone is afraid of them.
That is why when Myeong-hwan throws a party, everyone tries to show up. They want to be on his good side, and if you are on his good side, then he and his group leave you alone.
I was pulled away from my thoughts when I felt Gwi-nam's lips against my ear. "I am almost ready to leave. Message your friends and let them know you are going home."
I took my phone out and messaged them under the watchful eye of Gwi-nam. Sun-Hee told me to be safe and that I would see her on Monday.
The two of us stood, and Gwi-nam grabbed my hand and started to walk in front of me. The crowd seems to part as we make our way to the exit.
I knew there would be whispers about him and I, but I didn't care. Not at this very moment because, for once, people were noticing me and just not for being the new girl.
We got to a car that I have seen a few times in the school parking lot, and it beeped open. He opened his drivers side door and got in. I should have known he wouldn't open the door for me.
Once I got in, I noticed how clean the car was. Gwi-nam at least waited for me to put on my seat belt.
"Are you okay to drive?" I finally asked. He held up his hand and grabbed for something that was on the dash of his car.
"What is that?"
"A ignition interlock. Basically, it's a Breathalyzer for the car. Got drunk last year and drove my Dad's car and crashed it."
We waited until he was done. The light went green, and the car was able to start.
I started to give him my address, but all he said was, "I know where you live, Princess."
Purple (Part 6) ♧ Pink (Part 8) (18+)
#reader imagine#female reader#reader insert#all of us are dead imagine#all of us are dead#all of us are dead gwi nam#all of us are dead fanfic#all of us are dead fic#aouad x reader#aouad imagines#aouad fic#aouad gwi nam#aouad yoon gwi nam#yoon gwi nam imagine#yoon gwi nam#yoon Gwi-nam fic#yoon Gwi-nam x reader#yoon Gwi-nam x female reader#gwi nam x female reader#gwi nam fanfic#gwi nam x reader#gwi-nam#gwi-nam fic#gwi-nam imagine
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Sincerely, Yours
Lie To Me Sequel
Pairing: Yoongi x F. Reader (Ji soo)
Type: angst, fluff, smut
Warnings: mentions of sex, alcohol use and vulgar language, mentions of vomiting, pregnancy scare.
Chapter navigation
Chapter 7
T minus 1 month. So many things have happened in the last few weeks. You and Ji soo have gotten closer, not official, but you’re practically dating. Taehyung begin packing for Tokyo and he confronted you about the trip. He basically said don’t hold back, if you wanted to return, return. If you want to stay, stay. Hoseok was still hoseok, joking that alternate universe yn and hoseok would be together, he regrets not noticing sooner but he is handling his feelings a lot better than you did. Namjoon caught Jess cheating on his own, he was wandering the park when he saw her, the secret you shared became an even bigger burden to him simply because he didn’t know how to tell Yoongi. Jungkook had found serenity in filming and editing, there wasn’t a day where he wasn’t filming everyone in the house. Jimin began teaching dance to the local orphanage, he said he felt at home when watching the kids have fun instead of looking so alone. Seokjin had met a girl, she worked at the flower shop in town and he was utterly whipped. Using your love for sunflowers to have an excuse to see her. Yoongi on the other hand, he has been very unwelcoming to Ji soo, having a bad attitude when he is around and very snarky when ever ji soo tried to have a normal conversation. but overall, you were happy to not think about Yoongi. Your mind was on Ji soo and that was all you wanted. Unfortunately this didn’t last very long.
You had woken up at 4 in the morning, this sudden urge of nausea. You sat on the floor with your face in the toilet as you continuously felt the urge. “kitten?” You could hear Ji soo from the bed. A few moments later he was behind you, rubbing your back as you stayed on the floor. “I don’t know what happened.” You groaned, wiping your face with the towel he handed you. “Are you alright now?” Ji soo lifted you off the floor as you went to brush your teeth. Nodding in agreement you returned to bed. Ji Soo had left to work a few hours later, and you ended up sleeping in. Taehyung waking you up with his playful music. “Come on, you’ve been sleeping too long.” He pulled the cover off of you. Groaning, you lifted yourself off, got ready and entered the kitchen with everyone. “About time,” Seokjin looked at you. He was preparing dinner, the smell of fish making your nose scrunch. “What are you making?” You covered your mouth, walking around the counter to see for yourself. The moment you closed in the nausea hit you. “Oh my god.” You covered your mouth immediately and ran into the downstairs restroom. you came back out and taehyung handed you water, asking over and over if you were all right. “I’m fine, I woke up sick this morning too.” You sighed as you sat on the stool. You could feel yoongi’s eyes on you, almost as if he wanted to ask if you were all right but decided against it. you sat in the kitchen for a moment, the boys leaving it slowly one by one. You were in your own world that you didn’t even realize it was just you and Yoongi. Truthfully you didn’t even realize he was there at all. You lifted yourself off the counter, mumbling nonsense to yourself as you opened your purse, pulling out the packaged pills are you realized you missed two day. “Nam-“ You cut yourself off. Closing your mouth to process what you held in your hand. “joonie.” You left the kitchen. Heading to namjoons room so he could take you to the store. “What’s up?” Namjoon finally answered after the fifth knock. “Please take me to the store.” You were slightly panicked and hebonly stared with a confused face for a moment before he agreed.
“Are you looking for specific ones?” Namjoon furrowed his brows as he looked at the endless amount of pregnancy tests. “I mean everyone will be out of the house,” he shrugged. “Why not take as many as you can?” He looked back, watching you bite on your fingernail. You didn’t respond right away instead you gave a nod and started putting them in the basket. “Okay, good idea.” Namjoon dumping nearly every single one in the basket as he went to grab liquor. “What is that for?” You whined. Namjoon putting it into the cart with a puzzled look. “if you’re not, to celebrate. If you are, well for me.” He teased. The ride back was nerve wrecking. Every cell in your body dancing at the urgency of you needing to know if you were pregnant or not. You and Ji soo had been having unprotected sex since you were on the pill, how could you have forgotten. Your mind is such a blur that you can’t even remember what you did those days. As soon as you entered the house Yoongi stood in front of you. Staring at you and then his eyes darting to the bag in your hands. “What are you doing here?” You questioned, namjoon sliding by you as he took the bag from your hands. “do you really think you’re pregnant.” It was more of a judgment than a question. “I-“ You paused. “I don’t know.” You pushed past him. “What do you mean you don’t know, why were you fucking him without protection. You shouldn’t have fucked him at all.” He grabbed your hand, trying to make you turn to him. “Yoongi,” you pulled away, your voice irritated as you headed to namjoons room. He wasn’t in there. “Joon!” You called and you heard him in seokjins room. “You shouldn’t have fucked him in the first place.” Yoongis soft mumble as you closed the bathroom door leaving namjoon and Yoongi alone in seokjins bed. You peed on every stick. coming out of the bathroom to the boys sitting there in silence. “Why are you still here.” You glared at yoongi. “I don’t need judgement from you.” You sat beside namjoon. “What are you going to do if you are.” His voice was off. He sounded, hurt. “yoongi i don’t know,” you whined. He looked down to the shoelace he was fiddling with it. “I don’t understand why you weren’t more careful.” He looked up to meet your eyes. “why are you even here.” You snapped, his face staying the same. “I want to know.” He glared back, his eyes full of something you couldn’t quite tell. Before you could argue back, the timer on your phone had went off. All heads turning to the bathroom door, nobody moving. It took a solid minute for yoongi to start getting himself up to go but you jumped up to stop him. “Stop,” you pushed him back and he stood in place. You grabbed the first one and read it, and you did it for every one. All coming out negative. As you released a breath you didn’t realize you were holding you sighed and came out in tears. “I’m not pregnant.” You unconsciously hugged Yoongi. You could hear him sigh in relief but your own feelings too important to care as to why he did. “What’s going on?” A familiar voice causing you pull away from the hug that lingered a little too long. “Ji Soo.” You started but his eyes darted to the restroom. The endless pregnancy tests along the counter. “are you relieved that you’re not pregnant,” ji Soo started. “Or relieved that it’s not by me.” He looked at the small space between you and yoongi. You stepped forward shaking your head to disagree. “No that’s not-“ he cut you off, his eyes narrowing at you. “then why were you hugging your ex in a bathroom full of pregnancy tests. Why wasn’t I called?” Namjoon sneaking his way out as he pulled yoongi by the sleeve. “Please you’re not letting me explain anything.” You tried to defend but he wasn’t having it. “Do you still love him?” The question catching you off guard resulting in you to stutter. “I-“ You froze. Ji Soo scoffed as he walked past you quickly out back to his car to leave. “Ji Soo wait!” You chased after him, your hand leaving around his wrist but he yanked it back. “You obviously still have feelings for him. Figure them out.” He snapped raising his voice at you.
He had made his way to the door and paused before opening it, turning to you with a sad, soft expression on his face. “What would you have done if you were pregnant?” He asked quietly. “Ji Soo, I’m not even staying here long. I leave in a month.” He grew furious again, it was more controlled this time. “and when were you planning on telling me that?” He turned to you completely. “That is what I was trying to say. You didn’t let me explain anything!” You defended yourself. Ji Soo shaking his head at you as he leaned against his car. “Kitten, you had weeks to tell me.” He argued. “And i was going to tell you, but I woke up this morning sick and then realized I missed a few pills and here I am.” You threw your hands up in defense and he sighed. Walking over to you as he pulled you into a hug. He arm pulling your head into his chest as he caressed your hair. “kitten, as much as I wish it was my turn.” He pulled away. “your heart still lies with him. You were scared today not because of the pregnancy itself.” You tried to cut him off but he put his finger up stopping you. “You knew that if you were, you’d lose him forever.” and you didn’t know what to say. part of you knew that was true. Ji Soo kissed your forehead and gave you a soft smile. “maybe someday you will be mine,” he opened his car door, stopping before he got inside. “but i think our trial ends here.” and with that he left. You don’t know what it was, but it made you cry. and it wasn’t a normal cry. It felt like heartbreak all over again, and you knew it wasn’t because of Ji soo, but because he was right. For whatever stupid reason, you were scared that a baby would make Yoongi never want you again. That you’d lose him for good. It hurt even more knowing that you were back where you started. Alone and soon to leave without the man you loved.
It was getting late, you were tired once again and in no mood to talk to anyone. So you went to bed, lying there crying yourself to sleep. The time read 3 am, you didn’t even hear him come in but you felt his arms wrapping around your waist, scaring you as you placed your hands over them to move but he shushed you. “how long have you been crying?” yoongi pulled you into his chest. “I don’t know.” The words barely coming out audible. “shh,” he rested his head on you, holding you tightly but not too tightly that you couldn’t breath. Your crying subsided, you had began to relax in his arms. “what’s wrong with me.” You called out, Yoongi staying quiet for a moment before sighing. “if there was something wrong with you, you wouldn’t have so many people in love with you.” He laughed quietly. “so what’s wrong with me that the boy I love doesn’t love me anymore.” You dozed off, not realizing you had said that out loud. Too bad for you, you fell asleep before you could hear Yoongi respond. Does he still love you?
#bts au#jung hoseok#jung jungkook#kim namjoon#kim seokjin#kim taehyung#min yoongi#park jimin#bts#min yoongi angst#yoongi au#yoongi angst
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F2F // KNJ
as your friend, he’s there for you. as your tutor, he’s there for you. as your lover… he’s halfway there
+
fully knowing you can’t pass the course without him, and him being self aware that he can’t go a few days without fucking you—nam joon agrees to be your tutor. it’s all fun and games until his best friend asks you out and you say; “yes”
navi | m. list | ask me ! | see note below for taglist request
pairing
tutor // smartass!nam joon + airhead // pretty privilege!oc
second lead syndrome: playboy!hoseok
au/genre
fwb // SLIGHT love triangle
love hate friendship
crack & angst
mini series // smau + written
warnings
implied smut + actual smut
name calling, dumbification, touches on technicalities of cheating, gaslighting, etc
parts
10/10
note: this fic is a mini series ‼️ therefore it WILL BE FAST PACED ‼️ please refrain from commenting on this post or the following parts posted to be added to the taglist . see note below 👇
taglist request: send a request with the title of this fic “f2f” // please DO NOT comment here or on the series . it gets confusing and i prefer answering and tagging through asks
index # f2f knj
01 // 02 // 03 // 04 // 05 // 06 // 07 // 08 // 09 // 10
end.
copyright ©️ 2023, muniimyg on tumblr.
#bts fic#bts social media au#bts smau#bts fake texts#nam joon fic#nam joon scenario#nam joon x yn#rm x yn#nam joon imagine#bts rm fic#rm smut#rm angst#bts smut#bts edit#nam joon blurb#nam joon texts#nam joon x reader#nam joon college au#bts uni au#tutor nam joon
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07 // series m.list
taglist request: send a request with the title of this fic “f2f” // please DO NOT comment here or on the series . it gets confusing and i prefer answering and tagging through asks
taglist: @bloopkook @pb-n-juju @taetaecatboy @ellesalazar @joonsjuice @firesighgirl @cursedcursives @whoa-jo @yoongukie-ff @jihopesjoint @mint--yoongs @xxxanimangxxx @floweryjeons
Nam Joon’s throat feels dry.
His brain pauses and his heart drops. He has no words as you stand outside his door, drenched from the rain. Your head is low but when you finally lift it up to look at him, he sees it.
Your eyes are puffy, your lips are slightly swollen, and you... You look so sad.
It hurts him deeply.
“Get in,” is all he manages to say. He reaches for your arm and pulls you inside. Instantly, he takes your drenched jacket and asks you to take off your shoes. He excuses himself for a second and goes to his room to grab a towel, a hoodie, and a pair of shorts you left behind.
As he hands them to you, you stay still.
“___, don’t shut down yet. Change first,” Nam Joon begs. “Please?”
You nod slowly, unsure of how else to act. Truth be told, you feel frozen. Everything in the past hour has felt so confusing... Nam Joon being a dick to you felt like it could be the one thing that could make sense.
So why isn’t he being one?
You take the clothes and he directs you to the washroom. Even though you’ve been over at his place a few times already, you couldn’t help but feel grateful for his extra direction. As you change, you can’t help but wonder why you came over and if the sudden need for him has turned more than physical.
“Can we talk?”
Nam Joon stands over the whistling kettle. He turns off the burner and then pours the heated water over a bag of tea in a cup. Offering it to you, you take it.
“What’s up?” he asks as he pours himself a cup too. “You feeling better?”
You shake your head as you take a sip of the tea. He looks at you a little funny. Tilting his head at you, you let him close in the space between. You feel him put his hands on your waist before lifting you to sit on the kitchen island.
“What’s wrong, ___?” he looks into your eyes. “What happened?”
“You did.”
His eyes widen. He leans in and tucks your hair behind your ear. You hold your breath, feeling your heart begin to collapse.
“What do you mean?” Nam Joon says it calmly. Like he’s trying not to spill any secrets but the way he’s treating you right now speaks louder than any of his words ever have.
You gulp. “Hobi broke up with me.”
“Oh? I’m sorry..” Nam Joon pauses. He would be a liar if he said he didn’t feel a little relieved. He knows a conversation with Hobi would be happening soon... And a part of him weirdly felt angry too. “Were you guys even together together? I didn’t know—”
“He broke up with me because he said he didn’t like me enough to take me away from his best friend,” you choke. “... It’s you, isn’t it? You’re his best friend.”
Nam Joon feels his pulse slow down.
“... Am I wrong? Tell me I’m wrong, Nam Joon... Because h-he said that it was you. It was you that took care of me at that party. It was you that didn’t want to introduce h-him to me. It was you all along—” you let out a sob. “I’m so confused. I get dumped by a guy that I really liked because his best friend that is constantly mean to me... Likes me? Like we’re in middle school or something?”
Nam Joon shakes his head and denies the truth.
“No, I’m not Hobi’s best friend.”
“Liar.”
“That’s also true,” Nam Joon laughs, trying to lighten the tense mood. Truth be told, he is only just realizing his feelings for you. “Can we talk about this later? I think you’re just tired and hurt. Nothing good will come out of this if we—”
“Do you like me, Nam Joon? Like more than a friend? More than a fuck? I’m pretty dumb but I’m not that dumb.”
The thing is...
Nam Joon is a smart guy but he’s not that smart.
In response, he pats your head and tells you you’re delusional. That the breakup has you focusing on the wrong thing... That you’re good enough for Hobi and that his best friend is probably someone else like that Seok Jin guy he always hangs around. Nam Joon then offers his bed for the night and you agree, feeling too tired to fight this. That night, he cuddles next to you and hopes that in the morning; you won’t bring this up.
First, he has plans to kill Hobi.
Then, he has to figure out what the fuck to do with you.
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THE ART OF WAR (1) // KNJ
after leaving oc heartbroken all these years, kim nam joon has the audacity to return and attempt to win her back. in his words, love is not over.
+
unwilling to accept that their love is over, kim nam joon puts oc’s patience to the test as he puts his plans into motion. he’s more confident, determined, and ever so willing to grovel at oc’s feet for one more chance
navi | m. list | ask me ! | no tag list
parings:
childhood friend / secret ex-boyfriend nam joon ! + heartbroken / high maintenance ! oc
genre/au:
slice of life
exes to lovers / slight enemies
rich / privileged life au
warnings:
misunderstandings + pettiness + angst
cockiness / jock attitude vs princess / brat attitude
jealousy, implied smut, and sexual tension
note:
dedicated to @joonsjuice because i promised this fic literal EONS ago </3
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5
Nam Joon was prepared for this.
Mentally, he knew this was coming. He was destined to feel this kind of ache. It’s just.. He didn’t expect it to hurt this much.
“I can’t believe you actually hit me,” he groans, taking the ice pack offered by his friend. Nam Joon presses the ice pack to his cheek, wincing at the applied pressure. “That was practically a punch, you dick!”
Seok Jin laughs, patting Nam Joon’s shoulders. Nam Joon shrugs off Seok Jin’s touch along with an annoyed eye roll.
“Hey, I only fulfilled a promise.”
It was true.
This punch was a foreshadow even before Nam Joon had left nearly five years ago.
Seok Jin has always been a protective cousin. Everyone knows that Jin doesn’t take the mention of your name lightly. Truly, it was nothing personal. He loved you more, he prioritized you more; you meant a lot to him. He had taken the place of an older brother you never had since the beginning of time. Perhaps that was a perk of being an only child with a cousin that loved to raid your snack cabinet.
Even if he had been friends with Nam Joon since primary school, it had to be done. Even if the tears you cried were sobbed five years ago, the matter of fact is: Nam Joon made you cry.
This hit was the price he had to pay.
“Have you gone to see her yet?” Jin’s tone goes soft. Half of him knows its a touchy subject and the other half can’t help but interfere.
“No,” Nam Joon scoffs. “Maybe when the colour of this bruise kicks in, I’ll go see her.”
“What?”
“I’m hoping she’ll feel bad for me and be nice.”
Seok Jin chuckles, in disbelief at how optimistic his friend is.
Nam Joon had the tendency to believe in you in ways that made others feel puzzled. Perhaps it was because he didn’t stay long enough to experience your rage and often took you at face value. From what he remembers, you’ve always been persistent and bubbly. Others perceived it as you being too naïve. Honestly? You were just too precious for the world and way too flawless for others to even stand a chance.
This is the part where he considers himself lucky. To have gotten to know you from such a young age—thanks to his mother and your late mother’s friendship—he had the privilege of being a part of your world from the very beginning. Therefore, he had always known the good side of living life with you. However, the perks of being your friend quickly felt overwhelming.
As you’ve always been expressive, affectionate to everyone you liked and bluntly honest with those you did not, Nam Joon felt indifferent. Moreover, Nam Joon could not escape this and everyone fell into believing that you were finally faced with something you couldn’t have.
To the world, he was older, smarter, and just a little out of reach. He was the boy next door and you.. You lived in a mansion with two nannies back to back. You could have and actually did have everything you’ve ever wanted. Yet, when it came to him, he often refused. Nam Joon stood prideful and consistent over his motto that he isn’t something you could add to your shopping list.
No.
Instead, he insisted that if you wanted him; you’d have to love him.
That's exactly what you did.
Needless to say, you always had a fighting spirit and it didn’t take much to wear Nam Joon down from his initial rejections.
Truth be told, Nam Joon was a good reality check for you. Your father surely admired that from him. He liked the way Nam Joon humbled you in a way that also preserved and acknowledged your worth. Often bringing you out of your picture-perfect life and reminding you of such humane feelings. Restlessness, frustration, loneliness, joy, and love. He had known you since the beginning of time and has grown to understand the way you process and prevail.
So, yes and so fucking what?
Nam Joon believed in you a little more than others. He had the right to.
“She’s changed,” Seok Jin admits, slightly disappointing his aspiring friend. “After you left, it’s like she shut down or something... It’s harder to make her laugh. It’s harder to change her mind. It’s harder to love her.. And it’s your fault, you asshole,” he breathes. ”I can’t believe you dumped her.”
Nam Joon rolls his eyes in response. “I left for school. I left for my career.”
“Yet you’re back to work for her father.”
“Living abroad was good for my professional and personal growth.”
“Is that what you said when ___’s dad interviewed you?”
“Maybe,” Nam Joon jokes. “I didn’t even go through an interview. He called me after his HR put my resume in the pile of the other candidates they were considering.”
“Is that what you’ll say to ___?”
“Fuck off!” Nam Joon sneers. Almost immediately, the two share a hearty laugh. The air between them feels lighter somehow. Then, it falls into a calming silence.
“Wait, does she even know you’re here?” Jin asks shocked.
Nam Joon scratches the back of his head, giving a guilty look. “Not exactly.. Her dad mentioned wanting it to be a surprise so I went along with it.”
“Her dad doesn’t know you’re her ex.”
“… Guilty as charged,” Nam Joon laughs. “I don’t plan on staying her ex for long so it’ll be fine.”
Confused and beginning to feel the need to protect, Seok Jin glares at Nam Joon. “Dude, I’m for real though.. It’s honestly safe to say that ___ hates your guts. Have you gone mad?” Seok Jin’s tone is concerning. Of course, he loves these two and wants them to end up together.. But he does not wish to be a part of the pain. It was messy when Nam Joon left, it would be such an odd act to clean up after all these years. “She was so broken, dude. I don’t think I can ever see her go through shit like that again.”
“Is that why you punched me extra hard?”
“It’s what you deserve.” Seok Jin insists.
He was right. Nam Joon left so cowardly and is back without much odds in his favour. Would that stop him? Absolutely not. He had to try.
For you, he’d try.
“She didn’t text, you know?” There’s a softness in the way he delivers this information. An underlying tone of insecurity and disappointment almost. “I thought she’d at least text.. Like back when the break up was still new.”
“That’s because I changed your number on her phone,” Seok Jin confesses. Nam Joon looks at him with an expression that is near unreadable. He feels betrayed, to say the least.
“Why would you do that?” Nam Joon gulps.
“If you were me, what would you have done?”
Nam Joon looks at Seok Jin sternly and it’s clear what he has implied. It disappoints Seok Jin.
“What would you have done?” Seok Jin repeats, sounding a little more demanding. “Book a flight back and be with her? After all the fuss you two created? You wanted out, dude. Did you really expect me to keep her waiting for you?”
Seok Jin pauses for Nam Joon’s answer. Nam Joon stays still, only blinking and biting his tongue.
“Joon, I’m happy you’re back. Seriously so fucking happy you grew professionally and personally.. But when it comes to ___, why are you showing up like a dotting teenager? She’s a grown-up now too.”
“It’s not like that—”
“What is it like then? Judging from your pride, I guess all those years of you going the extra mile of insisting that her father shouldn’t be her fast pass to success goes down the drain for your hypocrisy.. Does that sound right to you?”
Nam Joon knows his friend is right. He can’t beat around the bush or sugarcoat any of his intentions. He was selfish for him to wish so, but he would be dishonest if he didn’t come to terms with how he wanted you to yearn for him. He wanted a bigger reaction from you. He wanted to work with something. In response, Nam Joon bows his head, completely aware that the lecture has not ended. In disbelief, Seok Jin’s blood begins to boil.
“You always complained about how she was too immature.. But you were the one that insisted on keeping your relationship a secret when she had no problem telling the world all about you. You were the one that left her out of the blue and now.. What I’m getting at is.. You wanted her to wait for you.. Just in case you wanted her again?”
Seok Jin is a little off with his theory, but Nam Joon feels it’s better to avoid addressing what is meant for you to know and not for others. He settles with: “we were both young.” Nam Joon lifts his head with a defensive look. “I was young.”
“And what? It’s supposed to be okay now that we’re older?”
Again, Nam Joon falls silent.
“You’ve always known she liked you. Since you told her she was pretty wearing her princess dress to your birthday—you had her. So, no, Nam Joon, you’re not stupid,” Seok Jin sighs. “You’re just selfish.”
Again, Nam Joon knows deep down Seok Jin is right but could he really blame himself? It wasn’t that he knew he had made a mistake—in all honesty, Nam Joon doesn’t regret what he did—but he definitely could have done things differently. There was probably a way to keep you around regardless of the distance he brought upon you two. There was probably a way to keep your relationship going—there was definitely a way to keep you.
Leaving was definitely not his smartest move.
“Besides, I’m not trying to befriend her,” Nam Joon hands the ice pack back to Seok Jin before getting up from his seat. “Who said anything about being friends with her again? I was her friend almost all our lives. Dating her was better.”
A dramatic gasp escapes Seok Jin’s lips. “You fucker..”
Nam Joon shrugs. It was true. He could admit to being an ass, but he’d never give up. He doesn’t like to feel defeated even if the circumstances were set up by him.
“Seriously, have you considered how selfish you are?” Seok Jin asks. He doesn’t sound mad anymore. Instead, he sounds genuinely curious. “I love you and want nothing but the best for you.. But I love ___ a lot more and want nothing but the best for her too. If you’re going to do what I think you’re going to do.. Could you let her walk away from you this time?”
“Have you no faith in me?” Nam Joon chuckles, attempting to divert the mood into something of a lighter sense.
“I have some faith in you,” Seok Jin admits, placing his hand on Nam Joon’s shoulder. He grips it for a second and grins. “Even so.. ___’s feelings towards you? That’s where my faith fractures. So, my advice? Know what you want and keep it that way. One slip up, one moment of uncertainty on your part.. All this goes to shit. I’ll support you if you can promise me you know what you want.”
Nam Joon vows something that brings Seok Jin conflicting feelings. Admittedly so, Nam Joon also felt the same when he came to this conclusion. He was here to grant his own wish. He smiles weakly.
“I want her back.”
Jungkook had left you all alone and zoomed out of the lecture because he had a thing.
A thing that was important enough for him to scurry his way out and apologize for not being able to come over and hang out. To that, you grant him forgiveness under the condition that he buys you coffee for the rest of the week. He has no choice but to agree since you drink coffee more than you drink water. With Jungkook out of the way, you take your time to gather your things and get going. You pack your notes and laptop in your school purse and grab your left over iced coffee.
Exiting the building, you feel your phone receive notifications. You pause, open your phone to check, and see it’s from your upcoming coffee boy.
Jungkook (2) Missed Calls
Jungkook [2:37PM]: Girly, there’s some guy leaning against your car?? Wtf
Jungkook [2:38PM] Attached an image
Jungkook [2:28PM]: Yk this weirdo? Call the cops if U don’t. I’m running late, bestie! Gg
Zooming into the picture, you struggle to identify whose leaning against your car. The man's face isn’t in the photo, but something about his posture and figure felt familiar. You run a few names in your head, but conclude to just let yourself experience a surprise. You put your phone away and scan the parking lot for your car. Oddly enough, your noisy friend was right. There was a figure leaning against your car. As you approach, you notice his height and a worn-out baseball cap.
Okay, a little creepy.
Should you call the police?
Just as you contemplate, without warning, the man lifts his head and your eyes meet.
And there it is.
There’s a moment in everyone’s life where they feel the utmost surprise. No, you didn’t feel surprised as much as you felt nauseous. You could tell there were a lot of feelings beginning to arise. All felt warm and sickening like how when you’re throwing up and you can’t stop. It all feels stuck and sharp, but so relieving to have done.
This sight.. This is a throw-up moment.
The rush of shock and pure confusion overwhelms your body halts when he lifts his hand to wave. You must be dreaming. This must be some sick lucid dream.
He can’t be here. He hasn’t been here in so long.. What the hell is he doing here, leaning on your car as if he knew you? Better yet, as if you knew him?
The only thing that made sense.. The only thing that was clear between you two is that when it had ended, you didn’t know if it was over or if it was really over.
Partly because he didn’t sound cold when he told you he had decided the end for you two. When it happened, it felt utterly heartbreaking to go through. Sometimes, people are so caught up with how the moment feels and forget to brace themselves for the days, weeks, months, and years of healing to come.. But not you. That’s exactly why you cried the moment he said what he said. You knew that it would hurt for a long time and this was just the beginning.
For weeks, you couldn’t help but wonder if he had always known this is what he was going to do. For weeks, you wished he had told you earlier than he did so you could have found a way to detach from him before he left. For weeks, you had convinced yourself that you could have changed his mind if you were better when he was around.
The weeks grew to months and months to years. Alone, you realized you’d have to force yourself to get over him. You wouldn’t do it if you had the choice.
Five years have passed since then.
Five years of so much growth, life, and clarity.
Five years without each other.
Then, it happens. In a blink of an eye, everything you’ve learned and unlearned about yourself vanishes. All the rage you turned into courage, all the despair you turned into hope, all the anger.. It just falls through your fingers like sand.
One could imagine this: it’s a sight, truly.
The way he’s leaning against your car with a look on his face that you felt the need to rub your eyes and convince yourself otherwise.
It’s humorous.
It’s devastating.
It’s everything you wanted five years ago.
Kim Nam Joon, your first and only, greets you with a look of love.
You gather whatever confidence you have inside and stare at him blankly. He steps towards you, intending to hug you, and you take a step back. You feel uneasy and it shows.
“Move,” you command, unlocking your car.
He holds his stance. “Hello to you too, ___.”
You offer him a half-assed smile. “Move.”
As stubborn as you are, he is too.
After years of knowing you, he knew he had to be just as strong as you are. He ignores what you say and turns to your car. He looks at it like he’s assessing it. “A Tesla, huh? I thought you were more of a Mercedes Benz kind of girl.”
You don’t answer. Instead, your doors open and you throw your purse inside. He shifts, blocking you from getting in. You can’t help but feel dizzy with the way he’s being so shameless.
How fucking dare he show up out of nowhere and act the way he’s acting? His confidence has always been your guilty pleasure. He knew that.
On the other hand, he wants to touch you. Should he?
Oh, fuck it.
Nam Joon places his hand on your waist, tugging you to take a step closer to him. He’s taller than you—that hasn’t changed and neither has the way it made your heart race. His cap covers your face and you’re thankful because you can feel the way that other students leaving their departments are beginning to eye you two. You feel uneasy with the closeness. It feels comforting and you’re angry at that. You’re angry at how easy this must be for him.
“Move.” You’re almost choking the four-letter word out. How is he still making you feel so small? So nervous.
“Is that all you have to say to me, essa?” You cringe at the pet name you haven’t heard anyone call you since him. You push yourself away from him and place your stiletto on top of his sneakers.
“Where’s your bike, Nam Joon?”
“You’ll be my ride home.”
“No, I won’t.”
“Then you can just ride me,” he smirks. “Again. You know? For old time's sake.”
“You’ve got some nerve,” you bite. “New shoes?”
He glares at you, suddenly remembering the way you throw a fit. Applying pressure, he turns his face and your pleasure is cut short. You quickly lift your foot off at the sight of the discolour around his eye.
“Jin?” you question, fighting the urge to take off the stupid cap. You want to see his face clearly. The bruise looks a little fresh since the colour isn’t deep yet.
Nam Joon offers you a cheeky smile. “Care for me?”
“I’m over you.” You answer a little too quickly. It amuses him and makes you feel embarrassed.
“Never asked if you were.”
Silence.
“But, you know.. If you are over me, why do you look so concerned? Your face. You’re frowning. Look, your eyebrows are doing that thing again,” he pokes the crease made between your furrowed eyebrows. You lighten your eyes, hoping that it would take away the look he’s going on about. He’s always been the type to notice your meaningless habits. It irritates you that he remembers.
One thing you’ve always been annoyed about is how people think they know you better than you know yourself. How is that even possible? It drives you mad.
“Because you’re annoying,” you bash, giving him a devious smile. “I guess some things really don’t change.”
“Maybe,” he starts, quickly moving again to block your attempt to get inside your car. You fold your arms, unamused. Again, he smiles at you sweetly. “You still care.”
“You wish.”
“And if I did?” he reveals. “Would that be such a bad thing?”
The way he chases your eyes makes your stomach turn. How is it that after all this time, you’re still fighting the urge to fall for his words again? It’s like he never even left. Could you even be mad at your body for the way it’s sending electric shocks and waves of neediness?
“Nam Joon, please get out of my way.” It almost sounds like you’re begging. You aren’t. You’re simply tired and this whole thing is just too overwhelming.
“No,” he decides. “Cute manners though. Did you learn some while I was gone?”
You scoff. “What? Did you lose your hearing in five years? Your ability to comprehend anything? What are you even doing here?”
“You know why.”
The suggestion is absurd.
No, you don’t. 
You don’t want to know why and you don’t want to guess why. Not right now at least. Groaning in frustration, you take a deep breath.
“Move,” you demand. “Move while I’m still being nice.”
“You know what would be nice?” Nam Joon chimes. “We haven’t got to talking. Let’s talk, ___. We always talk. I beg you, principessa,” he attempts.
For the nth time today, he has made your stomach swirl. This stupid pet name could be the cause of your death.
“What’s there to talk about?” you ask. “You’re a stranger, Mr. Kim.. A mere childhood friend—“
“I was your first kiss.”
“Whose to say?”
“Shall I remind you? Maybe you’ll remember better.”
He takes a step towards you and you instant put your hand on his chest. You feel his heart for a moment. It beats fast and you can’t help but feel close to him all of the sudden.
“Stop,” you beg rather weakly. “Fuck off, Nam Joon.”
“You aren’t even going to welcome me home?”
Alright, Nam Joon sounds stupid now. Home? Here? Certainly not. Home isn’t a place you abandon.
With not much to say, you’re left with the only option. You tip your drink over and let it slowly pour over his new shoes. Yet, he doesn’t break eye contact with you. He doesn’t budge. As the coffee spills over his new shoes, he waits for the cup to empty before opening his mouth to speak.
You beat him to it.
“Welcome home, Nam Joon.”
“Thank you, ___. Good to be back.”
“Good for you. Now tell me something,” you smile at him sweetly. You shove the empty cup to his chest and wipe your wet fingertips on his shirt.
“Anything.” Nam Joon promises, letting you use him like a rag.
“When do you leave?”
#nam joon fic#bts rm#bts namjoon#namjoon fluff#namjoon exboyfriend#namjoon scenario#nam joon x oc#nam joon x yn#bts x yn#rm angst#rm x yn#rm smut#bts hyung line fic#bts fanfic#bts angst#bts exes to lovers#bts f2l#bts e2l
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02 // series m.list
taglist request: send a request with the title of this fic “f2f” // please DO NOT comment here or on the series . it gets confusing and i prefer answering and tagging through asks
taglist: @bloopkook @pb-n-juju @taetaecatboy @ellesalazar @joonsjuice @firesighgirl @cursedcursives @whoa-jo @yoongukie-ff
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THE ART OF WAR (3) // KNJ
after leaving oc heartbroken all these years, kim nam joon has the audacity to return and attempt to win her back. in his words, love is not over.
+
unwilling to accept that their love is over, kim nam joon puts oc’s patience to the test as he puts his plans into motion. he’s more confident, determined, and ever so willing to grovel at oc’s feet for one more chance
navi | m. list | ask me ! | no taglist
parings:
childhood friend / secret ex-boyfriend nam joon ! + heartbroken / high maintenance ! oc
genre/au:
slice of life
exes to lovers / slight enemies
rich / privileged life au
warnings:
misunderstandings + pettiness + angst
cockiness / jock attitude vs princess / brat attitude
jealousy, implied smut, and sexual tension
this chapter includes a frat party and implied ill intentions !!! stay safe & watch over ur drinks friends
note:
did someone ... say angst ??? welcome . also there are crumbs of jealousy in this chapter hehehee . pls send ur thots nd lov thru interactions w me <3
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5
“No good morning kiss?”
You freeze, shutting your eyes to soak this feeling in. Defeat? Embarrassment? Frustration? Lucky for you, it’s all of the above. You shift slowly, turning your body to face a sleepy Nam Joon. He reaches for you.
You sit still, unable to find the words or even process your next move. All you know is that it’s too early for this. The rain didn’t wake you up. No, it wasn’t the morning dew that did it either. Instead, it was the sound of clarity. The sound of birds chirping and the rainfall’s end. Outside still looked angry. You note that there are still cloudy and angry skies. Maybe this afternoon, later tonight, or sometime again this week, they will continue to cry half as hard as you did when you had your heart broken.
It’s odd. You know exactly where you are and who you’re with… But you can’t comprehend why and what you’re doing. You hadn’t thought this part through.
The leaving him.
To be laying in bed with the same man that was responsible for this mess. To be laying beside him with no intentions of letting him love you again or begin again. Yet, you can’t find it in yourself to move.
Move.
Just move.
Get up and go—
“Stay,” Nam Joon murmurs, digging his face into the crook of your neck. Your body stiffens, fighting not to melt into his touch. You missed being this close to him. Last night, as much as you hate to admit it, was the best sleep you’ve had in a while. It was the safest you’ve ever felt during rainfall. “Don’t leave me.”
You huff.
“Rich coming from you,” you spit. You attempt to push yourself up, but Nam Joon wraps his arm around your stomach and keeps you from getting up. You practically bounce back onto the mattress.
“It’s still raining.”
“No, it’s not,” you correct him. A part of you hates this and loves it all at once because wow, does it feel good be the one that gets to choose to leave or stay. Wow, does it feel good to have him beg you to stay instead of the other way around. “... And it’s still you, Nam Joon. We can’t—”
“We can.” Nam Joon says sweetly, not offering much but this moment between you two.
You correct yourself. “No, I can’t—”
“Shh,” he hushes. “I can’t hear the rain if you keep talking.”
“Nam Joon, it’s not raining.”
“I know it isn’t,” Nam Joon digresses. “Of course, I know it’s not raining.. I’m asking you to pretend like it is. Stay, essa. Don’t leave me yet.”
It’s rich, really. Rich and bitter coming from him. It doesn’t make sense why and how he had the confidence this early in the morning. It doesn’t make sense how he could be so shameless in asking you for such a thing. He doesn’t deserve to ask you anything. Yet, your heart aches from his words—almost like it could break and be pieced back together just with the right ones. It’s so unfair. Everything about Nam Joon is unfair and so frustrating because deep down, he has you.
He still has you.
So, in the silence, your sleepy heart gives in. Too tired to put up a fight… Too weary to leave and too broken to try to fix. It’s strange how Nam Joon can make such audacious requests and get his way. Even with knowing how much this crosses the line, you stay.
You don’t know why but you just do. Perhaps it’s because in the world where you and Nam Joon begin to heal; yes, it’s still raining.
As the week goes by, Nam Joon continues to be arrogant, naughty, and completely insane. It sickens you but as much as you hate to admit it, no matter how hard you try to brush it all off; his tactics worked. His cheeky comments often made you smile and turn away shyly and any slight touch shared with him often made your heart race.
It’s embarrassing.
You two don’t talk about that night or the morning after. There wasn’t much to say anyway. Instead, you two began to warm up to one another. The mornings when you two met one another, sleepily making coffee together, felt like old times.
Except, he doesn’t kiss your shoulders and murmurs a, “good morning, my beautiful essa,” like he used to.
Except, you two don’t go to school together and find a way to secretly hold hands during lunch break.
No, those were the old times.
Now, you get ready to go to Uni and he goes the other direction to your father’s company. He comes home later than you on most days and the dinner you saved him goes cold. Often, you wonder what would happen if you just didn’t cook for two or if you invite Jungkook over to eat Nam Joon’s plate. You wonder if Nam Joon would react and start a fight with you. You wonder if by doing so, he’d fight for you to care.
The honest truth is, having him around again has made you realize you do care for him—that caring for him doesn’t depend on distance or the time that slipped between you two. You care for Nam Joon the same way you always have. Except, this time, it hurt to care for him.
Which led you to this.
Drinking your feelings away at a stupid frat party you were invited to. You don’t even know where Jungkook and your other friends went. You’re only fifty percent sure that they’re still in the same house as you. The music blasts so loud your ears feel like they could fall off. You think someone is calling for you, but everything around you spins far too fast for you to really process whatever is happening.
You aren’t even too sure where you are.
One moment you were dancing with Jungkook, the next you were flirting with a guy he introduced you to. Taehyung! Ah, right… That’s his name. He’s really cute! Tall, has nice hair, and dressed up to your standards! Unlike Nam Joon.. Nam Joon almost always wears sweatpants and hoodies as if they’re stylish… Gross.
Taehyung has a thing for art and recited, “Having A Coke With You,” by Frank O’Hara to you. He looked you deeply in the eyes and almost kissed you when he says the lines;
“… and the portrait show seems to have no faces in it at all, just paint you suddenly wonder why in the world anyone ever did them. I look at you and I would rather look at you than all the portraits in the world…”
Except you don’t kiss him.
As he leaned in, you laughed and pushed him away. Before you know it, you’re being swallowed by a crowd of people and being given more and more drinks. You drink and drink until you get so dizzy you decided it’s time for you to find a place to sit and just… Think.
You need to think.
So much has been happening at the same time nothing is happening.
It’s so weird. It’s so contradicting, you feel like you’re confusing yourself.
Yeah, you’re so confused.
Suddenly, you find yourself staring at your reflection. Hey! You found the bathroom. You smile at yourself before your lips fall into a frown.
What a waste of a pretty face—to be all sad and lonely over a boy that left you years ago.
Oh, how life hurts.
You give in.
Your feet hurt. You find yourself crawling to the bathtub and resting against it. In case you need to throw up, at least the toilet is right there. Ah! Even when drunk, you’re truly so fucking brilliant.
So independent.
So sleepy…
Just as your eyes get heavier and heavier, a figure approaches you—no, four figures approach you. Three handsome men. All tall and with short black hair. Why do they look familiar?
“I found her!” Someone calls out. Muffled voices follow and move towards your direction. You perk yourself up, unsure of who you’ll be meeting.
You hope it’s a prince.
Instead, four men gather around you. One looks like they’re opening a bottle of water and the other gets off their phone and ends their call. Who could they be calling? Isn’t this a party? Shouldn’t he be partying?
Ugh, what a buzzkill.
“I caught a bunch of guys hovering over her and giving her more drinks,” one voice explains to the others. One lets out a frustrated groan and the other just stares at you concerned. “After I confronted them, she wasn’t even in the crowd.”
One of them kneels before you and tries to look into your eyes. You smile at him warmly, letting out a tiny giggle. “Jungkook?”
He nods and lets out a relieved sigh before turning to the other three men who continue to stand around you with crossed arms. “Dude, I swear, I had my eyes on her. She was fine! She was talking to Taehyung and they were flirting—you’ve got hella rizz, by the way.” Jungkook then extends his hand to be dabbed up.
Gladly reaching dabbing Jungkook up, the man says, “awh, thanks man! I appreciate it—”
“You’re Taehyung?”
Oh.
This voice sounds familiar.
Hey!
You know this voice. It sounds a lot like—no. It can’t be! Isn’t he at home? Eating a cold dinner and getting ready for bed? He has work tomorrow, you know? It’s only Thursday.
“Yeah!” Taehyung, who you’ve pieced together by now, answers, “nice to meet you. You are?”
“The boyfriend—”
“Ex-boyfriend,” another voice corrects. This man kneels down and playfully shoves Jungkook away. “My cousin is an idiot. Do you know that, ___? You could have seriously been in danger.”
You pout, eyes beginning to water. You can’t help it. You’re an emotional drunk.. “Jin? Hi! … What did I do? Why are you here?”
“You walked away from Jungkook,” Jin explains. “It’s fine if you want to flirt with Taehyung—”
“No, it’s not.”
“Nam Joon, shut up,” Jin hisses, sharply turning and glaring at him. He turns back to you and huffs. “___, it’s fine because you and Jungkook know Taehyung. What’s not okay is turning around and letting random men give you drinks at a place like this! Did any of them touch you?”
You shake your head. “No, sir!”
“Be serious, ___.” Jin nags. You pout and comply. “I think you drank too much, ___. It’s a good thing Jungkook called us and we found you before anything happened.”
You look at them confused. “What could happen to me?”
“You could’ve gotten hurt, ___. Don’t act all naïve—”
You laugh. “Hurt? I’ve been hurt already. Do you know Nam Joon? My ex-boyfriend?” Your eyes water again. This time, you try to focus and fix your gaze on whoever you’re talking to. You try to sit yourself up and Jungkook quickly assists you.
He whispers a warning to your ear. “Babe, stop. Don’t say this shit right now—”
“Okay, but listen to me just this once, mister,” you grumble, gulping before you begin your rant. You can barely keep your eyes open but that doesn’t stop you from speaking you motherfucking truth!
“I had to forgive myself for viewing his lack of reciprocation as a challenge to convince him of my worth. Every day for the past five years has felt like war. I can’t decide if I’m happy and free because I keep looking for him in everyone I meet. I keep craving to be loved but only the way he did. He set the bar so high, you know? I wanted him back for so long so I could be loved again and so I could love him again but it just hurts now. Not as much as it did before because before sucked so bad,” you force a laugh out. It sounds like a sob. It turns into a sob. “And now? Now I just want to unlove him as much as I can. Do you know w-why, mister?”
The four men stay silent. The one you keep your eyes locked on nods slowly, asking you to proceed.
Jungkook feels uneasy. “Nam Joon, don’t—”
“Why?”
Your lips curve into a soft smile but your eyes continue to look devastated. “Because you don’t hurt the people you love and that’s what he did. Which means, he doesn’t love me.. And that’s kind of fucked up because now, I don’t care if I win or lose when it comes to love... As long as it’s not myself. I can’t lose myself again. Loving him had me unloving myself. Imagine! I was wrapped around his finger since the day we met... He knew that too! He dated me, loved me, f-fucked me, chose me... A-and then one day, he didn’t. One day he left and I.. I had t-to unlearn it all. I h-had to unlearn how t-to be his,” you sob, feeling like you’ve lost control of your emotions.
“Like, y-you know h-how they say you’re s-supposed to leave parts of yourself when you love? T-that way, when it ends,” you cup your mouth with your hands to imitate sharing a secret, “because it will,” you whisper. “... Y-you don’t lose yourself. I messed up there because Nam Joon ruined my fucking life—mmfh!”
Jungkook covers your mouth. You bite his hand and he winces at the sharp pain of your teeth.
“Are you insane!?” Jungkook sneers, “I’m going to sue you.” He threatens you with love.
“With what money?” you taunt him. Oddly enough, you begin to compose yourself, “woah, hey! Why is everything spinning so much?”
Nevermind.
Without warning, you tip over. Jungkook catches you in his arms and looks up at the others. Your breath hitches before it turns entirely into you crying onto Jungkook’s chest. He holds you tight and feels torn. Was this supposed to be Nam Joon holding you? Should he pass you to Nam Joon?
Jungkook has known you for a while. He knows the boundaries in your friendship and one of them is Nam Joon. He has never seen you this broken or emotional before. It’s quite the opposite from your usual Azula like personality. Jungkook has never seen you this weak.
Once Taehyung sees you’re in capable hands, he then excuses himself and wishes everyone a goodnight. Actually, first he offers the boys a ride home but Jin refuses, saying he brought his cae and Taehyung should just go home. It’s been a hell of a night. Jin thanks Taehyung for the help. Nam Joon rolls his eyes as Taehyung pushes past him to leave.
“Let’s take her home,” Jin sighs once your cries die down. You cradle yourself to Jungkook who lifts you up, carrying you like a baby. As he moves past Jin and Nam Joon, he takes you to Jin’s car that is parked outside. He settles you in and sits beside you. You lean and rest on Jungkooks lap. He plays with your hair and prays to God you don’t throw up on him.
Before Jin follows, he pauses and exchanges a look with Nam Joon. Nam Joon, who watches you be carried out, feels his eyes begin to burn with threatening tears. See, it was one thing to know that he hurt you, it was another to feel it.
“She’s just drunk, man.” Jin pats Nam Joon on the back. “I bet she doesn’t even know what she’s saying.”
That’s what scares Nam Joon even more.
He knew you.
The way everyone makes excuses for you is the exact reason as to why you’re the way you are. It worries Nam Joon even more knowing that you probably knew what you were saying and exactly who you were saying it to. You weren’t dumb and being drunk is barely an excuse. You chose your words and meant them. After all, drunk sayings are sober thoughts.
Jungkook carries you to bed.
There, you take your time throwing pillows at him and jumping on your bed. He has never seen you this drunk before and it kills him to not be recording this. Deep down, he’s a good friend.
He will, however, always remind you of how ugly you look when you cry.
Jin and Nam Joon settle themselves in the kitchen. They were actually on their way to grab a late dinner together before Jungkook called Jin. When Jin picked up and heard about the situation, the two suddenly lost their appetite. Now, three hours later, he sticks his head into your fridge. Rummaging around, Jin finds a plate of food. “Did you cook this? No way! Wait, was it Bon?”
Nam Joon shakes his head, eyeing the plate. “No, ___ did. She cooks dinner and fixes me a plate every night.”
Jin looks at him with a goofy grin as he takes off the saran wrap and shoves the plate into the microwave. “What are you two? Married?”
A chuckle follows but is instantly paused. He regrets the words that fall out of his mouth. “Too soon?” Jin sings like an apology. When the microwave beeps, he takes out the food and pulls on a cabinet drawer. Taking out two forks, he places the plate on the kitchen island. Leaning forward, he takes a bite before he offers Nam Joon the other fork. “Are you okay?”
Nam Joon shrugs, taking the fork and stabbing a piece of broccoli. He eats it and with a mouthful asks, “am I allowed to say no?”
“Why wouldn’t you be?”
“I ruined her,” Nam Joon simply frets. “I didn’t know it was that bad. I can’t imagine what it looked like five years ago…”
“It takes courage to leave as much as it does to stay,” Jin offers comfort. “… Some shit like that. I don’t know. My friend Yoongi once said that. I just never knew it would be a useful saying so I didn’t bother memorizing it accurately.”
Nam Joon lets out a small laugh. Jin has never been one to be sentimental so it’s a little difficult for Nam Joon to imagine Jin having such a thoughtful friend. “I mean, yeah, it wasn’t easy on me either. I bought plane tickets and canceled them over and over again. I met so many people and continued to look for parts of her in them too. It felt so useless meeting anyone because I already met the love of my life, you know? I hired so many artists to paint ___ in their perspective and respective styles just so I could see her again. So I could feel like I’m still learning about her—like I never left her.”
“I didn’t know that,” Jin feels completely shocked at Nam Joon’s sudden confession. He shoves a few more bites in, splitting the plate to share with Nam Joon more evenly. “Where are the paintings? What are they for aside from your weird sentimental pussy moment?”
“In a gallery room,” Nam Joon puts his palms to his forehead. It’s been a long night. He’s beginning to get tired and this conversation is something he never expected to have... Just yet. However, here he is. Might as well be honest. Might as well confide in someone, right? “I was going to show it to her. Like a gesture or some shit like that.”
Jin doesn’t buy it. He looks at his friend who continues to fidget around. Nam Joon shifts his attention around the kitchen as if there’s someone to look for—rather, something he’s missed. He’s hiding something. Jin knows it.
“Fess up,” Jin demands, pushing the plate towards Nam Joon. “What are you up to?”
Nam Joon puts his hands up in defeat. “Nothing,” he attempts to sound convincing. “Nothing now.”
“What does that mean?”
“Nothing—”
“Nam Joon,” Jin warns. “Why the gesture? To get back together with her? Isn’t that a bit much? You told me you guys were doing okay anyway so—”
“To propose,” Nam Joon reveals. “I was going to propose to her.”
Jin’s eyes widen, completely unsure of how to react. “What? Congrats and all but what the fuck? You two aren’t even together—”
“It was for the future,” Nam Joon explains. “I don’t see anyone else for me but her. Obviously, I wasn’t going to propose to her now or anything. It’s just… There. You know? It’s there waiting for her like I am. I’m willing to wait.”
“Nam Joon, that’s great and all but—”
Jin’s response is cut off as Jungkook suddenly stumbles down the stairs and rushes into the kitchen. With annoyed eyes, he meets the two.
“Fuck, she’s such a bitch. She told me I was chubbier than usual! Like, hello!? It’s literally bulking season. Who the fuck is a skinny ledged during winter—”
“You left her alone?” Jin worries, getting ready to head upstairs.
“Don’t even try,” Jungkook narrows his eyes toward Nam Joon. “She pushed me out of her room and locked herself in it. She wants Nam Joon.”
Jin scoffs. “She can stay there then.” At this point, he feels mad. You’re truly the most childish person he knows. Perhaps some alone time will do you good. You can sober up. It’s not like your mini fridge filled with sparkling water will do you any harm anyway.
“Yeah, see.. That was my initial response,” Jungkook tightens his lips. “But I suggest you open a window and look outside.”
Jin’s face drops, completely knowing what Jungkook is saying. He turns to Nam Joon and sighs deeply. The three men exchange looks as Jungkook wishes him luck. He mentions that he’ll be crashing in the guest room and excuses himself. Jin shoves his hands into his pockets and leans towards Nam Joon as he begins to exit the kitchen.
“Just for the record,” Jin begins. “I hope she’ll say yes.. You know, when the time comes.”
Nam Joon, for the first time tonight, finally feels okay. He feels relief even if it’s only for a second. He knows the moment he knocks and you open your door; the rain will not be the only thing that pours tonight.
“When are you supposed to stop loving someone?” you wonder.
Nam Joon has placed you on top of your sink counter and himself in between your legs. He tilts his head at you, unsure why you’re suddenly speaking to him. See, the moment he knocked on your door and said it was him, you unlocked it and just sat on your bed. He made his way to your window and closed it. He shut the curtains also to block any sight of the rain picking up. When he turned his attention to you, you had gone into the bathroom to shower. The entire time, you were silent and simply nodded to his short questions.
Yes, you were okay.
Yes, you were sobering up.
Yes, you still wanted him here.
“Why are you asking me that?” he retaliates.
You pout, your eyebrows furrowing together. Leaning your head toward him, you cross your arms as well. “I asked you a question. Be polite and answer it. Have you no manners, mister?”
It pains Nam Joon to smile along at your playfulness. “You’re still drunk,” he concludes. “Let’s not.”
You shake your head vigorously. “I’m tipsy.”
“Still intoxicated,” he points out as he pats your head. You roll your eyes up to watch his hand mess up your hair. You wave him off and he presses his lips to a slight frown. “Hey, I’m glad you’re okay.”
“Of course I’m okay,” you almost slur your words. “I’m perfect.”
Nam Joon looks at you fondly. He holds his gaze, wanting to remember being this close to you again. Your make-up is off and a towel is wrapped around your hair. You look like a boiled egg and he knows you’d hate him for a lifetime if he made that comment out loud. You’ve always been perfect. Even when you were annoying and sensitive you were perfect. Even as you cried and declared your bitterness towards him—you were more than perfect. Loving you is poetry. You were so chaotically beautiful and it physically pained him to watch you unfold the way you did. He cherishes you so much. He himself can not recognize how much pain he has caused you. He’s afraid that if he will, he might just die. He really could.
“You’re perfect,” Nam Joon hums as he takes your toothbrush and toothpaste from your cupholder and prepares it for you. He offers you your toothbrush with squeezed toothpaste on it. You giggle and shake your head.
“Answer my question and then I’ll brush my teeth.”
“Who said we were negotiating?” Nam Joon provokes. “Brush your teeth and go to bed, essa. You need to rest. It’s been a long night—”
“Jungkook said,” you clear your throat and lower your gaze. You even buff out your chest and purse your lips the way he does. “Until they break my heart, I give my all to those I love.” You mimic his voice before breaking into laughter. “Oh, wow... Isn’t that silly?”
“What’s so silly about it?” Nam Joon entertains you.
“He said, ‘those he loves,’ HA HA!” you snicker. “Doesn’t he know I only love one person?”
Nam Joon pauses. He stops fidgeting and finds your eyes. There, his gaze softens. “What?”
“Also, I already had my heart broken.. But it just doesn’t stop,” you sigh, feeling defeated as always. “It doesn’t stop breaking and loving you.”
“___,” Nam Joon whimpers, hating the way you look at him. He feels so much guilt and regret. “Maybe we should have this conversation when you’re sober—”
You shake your head at him again. “You didn’t answer my question, Jungkook did. So now, I change my mind. I have a different question.”
Nam Joon doesn’t know how many times he has paused to take a deep breath or to sigh. You’re not entirely complicated or difficult… It’s just been an insanely long night. The thought of so many possible bad scenarios exhausted him. At the end of the night, he’s over the moon that you’re safe and you’re home with him and the two other people stay by your side. He attempts to brush this conversation off. He should encourage you to do the same.
“___, brush your teeth and head to bed. Get some rest and we can talk about this tomorrow—”
“Do you care about me?”
The corner of his mouth twitches. Nam Joon’s hands curl into a fist. For a moment, he’s angry that you would ever ask him a silly question like that. Was rushing over to you tonight not a good enough answer? Is being with you while it rains not good enough? Then, he unclenches his fists and his lips begin to quiver as he recalls what led to your mistrust.
“When did I not?” he answers with his own question.
You swing your legs back and forth, your ankles almost hitting the sink cabinet. You even take your time and look around your pearl washroom, tapping your cheek as if you were in deep thought. Then, it hits you.
“When you left. You left like you didn’t want me anymore,” your voice gets weak. “... Like you didn’t care about me.”
Nam Joon can practically feel his knees go weak. His body slumps and he tries so hard not to cry in front of you. He didn’t need to tell you about his pain—he needed to make sure yours was being taken care of first. “Of course, I wanted you, ___. I wanted and always will want the best for you. You needed to stay and grow up! To be with family—”
“You were my family.”
His heart breaks for you. “Essa, come on, don’t say shit like that—”
“You were a lot of things for me. Only you care about me and you left me,” your eyes water and you hurry the last part of your sentence to avoid your voice from breaking.
Nam Joon shakes his head, tucking your hair behind your ears. He cups your face with his hands and meets your eyes. “That isn’t true. Your father cares about you, Seokjin cares about you, Jungkook and even that fucker Taehyung—”
“Do you care about me?” You ask him again.
Nam Joon hisses, repeating his answer from before. “Essa, when did I not?”
“Now, though… Do you care about me now?” It almost sounds like you’re begging. You sound so tiny and so insecure, it makes you feel like it. Tiny and insecure. You hate this.
You hate the way Nam Joon lets out a breath and hesitates to hold you. Instead, his eyes water faster than yours, and tears begin to roll down his face. You reach to him and wipe them with the back of your hand. Nam Joon continues to cry, each sob increasing by the second. He practically trembles as you tug him towards you. When his body hits yours, he slumps over and wraps his arms around you. Nam Joon fights to catch his breath and ultimately fails. Instead, he cries like he did when he had broken up with you all those years ago. This is the first time he lets himself cry. Your words triggered and cut deeper than a knife. He has tried so hard to act like everything was going to be okay between you two—that he had no choice but to come back and know exactly what he wanted.
The truth is, he knows he wants you.
That’s as far as his assurance goes. He wasn’t sure how to win you back or if he even could. He just needed to be with you again.
“Stay, Nam Joon,” you whisper, shutting your eyes and holding him tighter. “It’s raining.. So, stay.”
You wake up alone the next day.
Actually, you wake up to pressing headache. Groaning, you reach over to your nightstand and check your phone.
Jungkook [9:01AM]: Had a class so Jin drove me to campus. We left medicine downstairs and made U some yummy for Ur tummy green juice to feel better <3
Jungkook [9:03AM]: Btw U’re banned from frat parties ... I forget U’re hot ?? And ppl wanna fuck U and have literal ILL intentions ?? Disgusting
Jungkook [9:04AM]: Let’s kill all men
Jungkook [9:05AM]: I’m excepted because I am Ur fave :p
Jungkook [9:07AM]: Bitch I can literally see U’re reading these msgs !!! REPLY
YN [9:21AM]: This green juice is mid
Jungkook [9:22AM]: U called me fat last night so if I’m dieting ,, U’RE dieting
YN [9:23AM]: What??? U’re so hot .. I probably said that because I was jealous of your tiny waist
Jungkook [9:24AM]: Stay jealous !!!
YN [9:28AM]: I will
YN [9:28AM]: Also
Jungkook [9:29AM]: Spit it out bitch
YN [9:29AM]: Where’s Nam Joon?
Jungkook [9:31AM]: He left .. I thought U knew?
YN [9:31AM]: Lol. Wdym?
Jungkook [9:33AM]: He was in the car with Jin and I. After they dropped me off they looked kinda suspicious tbh. He had a suitcase? A big one at that... I thought U guys fought and U kicked him out or smt. I didn’t want to ask in case U didn’t want to talk abt it but like for real... Did U guys fight?
YN [9:36AM]: Jungkook
Jungkook [9:37AM]: What’s up
YN [9:38AM]: It’s still raining
#nam joon x yn#rm x yn#nam joon x reader#bts x yn#nam joon fic#nam joon scenario#rm angst#bts rm fic#nam joon angst#nam joon blurb#nam joon imagine#bts fic series#nam joon ex boyfriend#bts exes to lovers#bts f2l#bts e2l
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09 // series m.list
taglist closed !
taglist: @bloopkook @pb-n-juju @taetaecatboy @ellesalazar @joonsjuice @firesighgirl @cursedcursives @whoa-jo @yoongukie-ff @jihopesjoint @mint--yoongs @xxxanimangxxx @floweryjeons
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TO BE (yours) // KNJ
he'll give in... right?
+
oc has always had a crush on her bodyguard, nam joon. when her monthly family dinner goes to shit, she turns to him for comfort. tonight, it was different. tonight, he just might give her exactly what she wants
navi | m. list | ask me !
pairing: bodyguard nam joon + heiress oc
au/genre:
bodyguard au
one shot
porn with(out) plot
warnings: oc has some grandma issues, oc is insanely unhinged (oc makes nam joon watch as she pleasures herself), masturbation/fingering (oc makes him hold her hand while she fingers herself), nipple play, blow job (oc chokes), slapping (of face and ass) and riding... name calling (joon calls her a slut, whore, and bitch), cockwarming ?? making out,, yeah idk ! find the rest out for urself ;)
note: happy birthday @joonsjuice LMAO
🏷️ permanent taglist: @joonsjuice @taetaecatboy @pb-n-juju @miss-rainy-days @firesighgirl @whoa-jo @vantxx95 @pamzn @kakixaku @casspirit0705 @tae165 @defzcl @sopebubbles @leefics @ggukkieland @bebebutbetter @yoongimentita7 @boraength @era-genius @4ksj @vampcharxter @miss-jupiter @floweryjeons @taegijns @jeonqkooks-main @ellesalazar
“I hate this fucking life!”
Before you can slam your bedroom door shut, a foot is placed to prevent you from doing so.
You huff, knowing exactly who is following you.
There was no point putting up a fight. Regardless of what you do, you know exactly how he would handle you. So, you move on. You focus on your feelings and the stress wrapped around it. As you take off your skirt and unbutton your blouse, he makes his way to his regular position.
Nam Joon stands beside the door, feet firmly planted on the ground, his hands placed in front, and his gaze straight ahead. If this was any other bodyguard, their presence would irritate you and ignite your anger even more… But this was Nam Joon.
It’s different.
Oddly enough, there's a sense of comfort when he's around. It feels like it's okay for you to be angry and throw a tantrum. He'd cover for you. He'd protect you. He'd deal with you.
Regardless, this is routine.
Once a month, you attend your infamous grandmother’s family dinner. There, you’d share your company’s progress and plans, and receive criticism.
No praise.
No empathy.
No encouragement.
It is never good enough for her. Even though you have a more successful business than your siblings and cousins—it meant nothing To your grandmother, it didn’t matter.
It always better.
To do better.
To be better.
After these horrendous dinners, you’d go home in tears. The pressure she’d put on you is often unnecessary, but you feel it. To your very core, you feel how intense the need to please her is.
Sometimes, you were angry. Often, you were sad.
For comfort, you’d typically contact your family friend, Jung Hoseok for some… Release. Sometimes, it was talking things through. Other times, it included fucking… But those nights were rare.
During those times, Nam Joon would wait outside the door. It made you wonder that night if he liked what he heard… Or if he felt jealous…
If he even gave it a second thought at all.
You see…
You’ve been unhinged since birth. By your grandmother’s orders, she hired a bodyguard service for you. To keep you in check or whatever (as if you’re this wild child that isn’t running the biggest company in your family). To keep you safe. To keep an eye on you. To keep you from doing bad things.
Sucks to suck because the only bad thing you want to do is your bodyguard.
Thank you, Grandma!
When Nam Joon came into your life, it felt like Christmas. He’s tall, handsome, smart, and funny in his own ways. If anything, he’s perfect for you. Aside it being his job, you really feel like he knows you. Your next moves and even your feelings—he’s good at predicting and protecting them.
It’s like not you could hide your intentions and attraction either. No, you take any and every chance to flirt with him.
Truth be told, you really need him to dick you down.
“Crazy how I’m literally changing in front of you and you would rather look at the wall,” you tease, as you unclip your bra and throw it at his head.
Nam Joon removes your bra from his head and continues to stay silent. Him ignoring you is something he does when he knows your emotions are high.
Rolling your eyes, you open your closet and grab your pajamas. You chose wisely, of course… You noticed Nam Joon’s eyes linger a little longer when you wear flimsy things. So, that’s exactly what you wear tonight.
A little ditzy floral pyjama set.
The fabric itself is thin and tight, making it easy for your nipples and the curve of your breast to be outlined. The shorts are practically panties… Guess you won’t be needing underwear either, right?
Once you put on the top, you bend down to take your underwear off. You throw it back, aiming for his head again. Perfectly, it lands just where you want it to.
“Oops! Sorry, I meant to get that in my laundry bin.” You explain, laughing as you put the shorts on.
You see Nam Joon’s shoulders rise and fall. He sighs, as he takes your underwear off of his head and places it in your laundry bin for you.
Cutely, you bump into him as you make your way to bed. Nam Joon purses his lips at you, almost feeling the need to choke when he sets his eyes on your pajamas.
You were doing this on purpose.
He knows it.
Tilting your head at him, you ask, “Do you like it?”
Nam Joon clears his throat as he stands to the side. Gestures at your bed, he ignores your question but replies with; “you’ve had a long day, Ms. ___. Please go to bed.”
“You know what else is long?”
“Ms. ___—”
“Oh, come on!” you whine, as you drop to your knees. “It’s not like this is the first time I’ve asked.”
“It’s also not the first time I’m saying no,” he chuckles. Then, he bends down, grabs you by the waist, and lifts you.
Your heart begins to race as he carries you.
He’s done this only a couple of times—more because you were having a temper-tantrum and he had to remove you from the environment. There was also this one time when you were crying so much at your grandmother’s dinner table that he swooped in like a knight in shining armour. That was probably the day you felt something for him…
A feeling beyond your wet pussy, that is.
Nam Joon sets you gently on your bed. As you lay, you reach for his hand. He turns to you and blinks.
“Joon…”
“Did you need something?”
“You.”
He squints his eyes at you.
“Go to sleep, Ms. ___.”
“Awh, come on!” you cry as he leaves your side. You miss your heart fluttering already. “You don’t even have to make me cum—”
With a warning tone, he interrupts you. “Goodnight, Ms. ___.”
Annoyed, you shift around your bed and attempt to make yourself comfortable. Unfortunately for you, all you can think about are your grandmother’s harsh words from tonight's dinner and the silence of your siblings and cousins whose lips did not even twitch to defend you.
Your grandmother’s invasive words begin to consume you. The feeling is… Horrible. It was rough, to say the least. Maybe, instead of distracting yourself… You could use Nam Joon for something else.
“Do you think my grandma hates me?” you ask with a weary tone.
Nam Joon reaches over to dim your bedroom lights and takes his time to walk back to his placement. As he does so, he thinks about it. This was also routine of you….
To hit on him, to get sad and look for comfort, and then finally go to sleep. It wasn’t every night—just the family dinner ones. On the regular, it would just be you making one or two flirtatious commentaries and then falling asleep as soon as possible.
Moments where you look for validation and comfort he thinks these are the purest moments of you. The fact that you’re about to rest, but can’t because you’re reflecting on the things that make you feel uneasy… Well, let’s just say that it’s on the list of reasons why he hasn’t quit his job. Aside from liking his profession, he also likes you.
There’s never a dull moment.
“I think she just wants you to be the best.” He answers plainly. “She just doesn’t express it well.”
You sigh. “So that means what I do right now isn’t the best? It’s not good enough? Is that it?”
“No,” Nam Joon shakes his head. “I think she expects more because you are more. The potential she wants from you is real because it lives in you. She’s impatient about seeing it, but business is all about growth and building. Ms. ___, you know you’re amazing, right? You’re perfect. Your grandmother could never hate you even though it may feel like it.”
Snickering, you cross your arms. “Are you just saying that because you’re on her payroll?”
“No,” he assures you. “I’m saying it because it’s the truth. Besides, you’re smart enough to know when I’m lying anyway.”
His words hit you.
Suddenly feel better. There’s no other way of explaining why. Sometimes, all you really need is a friend… But being friends with Nam Joon?
You hate that.
“... So, you think I’m amazing?”
Nam Joon doesn’t respond.
So, you try again.
“If I’m so amazing… Then, why don’t you want me? No one’s here, you know! It’s just you and me. Nothing bad is gonna happen… You don’t need to protect me—”
“Ms. ___—”
“I’ve wanted you for so long… You know it too! Come on, I know you just as well as you know me—“
“Highly doubt that, princess.”
“I want to know you… All of you,” you confess, quickly getting out of bed. You stand in front of him and look up at him. Batting your eyelashes, you try to sound as innocent as possible. “Tell me you don’t want me.”
Nam Joon feels a shiver.
He gulps as you place your hand on his chest, slowly moving it around to feel him. In an even slower motion, you begin to slide your hand down from his chest to his abdomen. He lowers his gaze at you as you give him pleading eyes. Gulping, he watches your hands make their way to his belt.
Then, he stops you.
Just as you’re about to unbuckle it, he grabs your wrists and pulls you up.
“I don’t want you.”
His words cut deep and his tone is harsh.
Too harsh.
There’s a look in his eyes that you’re well aware of. In that understanding, you don’t feel so awful anymore. So, you keep your head high. If he wants to play like this, then so be it.
Let’s play.
“Good thing I’m smart and I know when you’re lying.” You then place your hand on his cheeks and squish his lips together. Tiptoeing, you place a small kiss on his lips.
Nam Joon is caught off guard.
This never happened before! It never went this far…
He thought he was immune to you. In a cliché sense, he didn’t this would happen. He’d be an idiot to not recognize that sexual tension between you two since the very beginning—but he never pictured it like this.
He never pictured his dreams to come true.
Just as Nam Joon is about to give in, you pull away.
It’s then that he hates himself. He wishes he spent more time memorizing the way your lips felt against his. Who knows if you’d ever do this to him again, right? This was a once-in-a-million for him.
You’re his one.
“Since you want to stand there and watch… Fine. Stand there and watch.”
Without saying another word, you twirl his tie in your hand and gentle tug him to follow as you make your way back to your bed. Nam Joon doesn’t really move though. He stays still, only letting his head turn as you let go of his tie. He watches with lustful eyes as you crawl onto your bed. Positioning yourself, you lean your back against your headboard and sit up in a way where you can comfortably plant your feet. Nam Joon’s eyes almost fall out of his head the second you suck on your fingers, open your legs, and shove your lubed fingers inside your shorts.
Nam Joon feels stuck.
He should look away, right? For some reason, he can’t. He has looked the other way every time you changed or tried to kiss him… Tonight, was different.
Tonight, he was weak.
As you let out a breathy moan, you begin to rub yourself.
Feeling the way your soft pussy is against your fingers, you whimper at the thought of Nam Joon caving and taking his place in between your legs. You apply some pressure and rub circles on your clit. Doing this begins slowly, but as you stare at Nam Joon in his suit, you can’t help but feel sensations in your pelvis. You rub yourself faster, feeling your legs tighten as you do so.
You rub yourself for what feels like a good 5 minutes. Noticing how quiet it suddenly became and how he’s not making any comments, you take this opportunity to tease him.
With a small voice, you ask, “N-Nam Joon… A-are y-you watching?”
He doesn’t respond.
“Can y-you look at me, p-please?” you stutter through the sensation. “I’m touching my pussy for you… So you have to be watching, okay? This is for you.”
Expecting silence, Nam Joon surprises you with his words.
“I’m watching, princess.”
You feel a relief.
In an even softer tone, you whine, “Good. D-do you like it? Do you like what you see? Am I doing it right?”
“Yeah,” he confesses. “Doing so good, princess. Don’t stop.”
Biting your lip, you spread your legs out even more. As you rub yourself, you squirm from the feeling of this not being enough.
Meanwhile, Nam Joon feels like he’s stuck in a trance. He can’t keep his eyes off of you as you pleasure yourself. He wishes to do it for you… But not yet. A part of him is curious to see how far you can push yourself. How much can you take? How far will you go? He wants to know when he’s needed… He wants to wait it out and let you have this.
“My pussy is leaking through my shorts… Is it pretty?”
Nam Joon’s breath hitches. “Yeah. It’s pretty.”
“I’m glad you think so… I’m thinking of you. You made this mess.”
The truth is, he’s afraid when you give this to him… He won’t be able to quit. He’ll be selfish. He’ll have you any way he wants and ignore what you want. So, this is him being considerate. This is him being patient. This is him letting you have your fun.
“Should I stick my fingers inside?”
He utters a hiss... Yet, with a soft tone, he encourages you, “Do what you want.”
“I need help.”
Nam Joon huffs. “You can do it yourself. If you can start this, you can finish.”
You groan, throwing your head back. “A-arghh, fine… Can you hold my hand though?”
He raises a brow.
But he also picks up his feet and makes his way to you.
He stands on the side of your bed and offers you his hand. Gladly, you take it. With your other hand, you split your folds open. Tugging on his hand, you pout.
“Can you spit on it? I would do it but… Your spit would help me cum faster.”
Too stunned to speak, Nam Joon sucks his inner cheek, runs his tongue along his teeth, and gathers spit from the back of his throat. He then leans over and—
“Mhmm,” you moan, massaging his spit in your pussy. “Fuck, that got me so horny. Are you horny?”
Nam Joon glares at you.
“Hurry up and cum,” he hisses. “ I’m supposed to be watching—”
“You are, aren’t you?”
Nam Joon gets the feeling you’re alluding to something completely different from his job. It makes him sick to his stomach that he’s fucking into it. God, did you have to be this compelling? All he can do is push you away… At least, try to.
“This is getting ridiculous.”
You let a small laugh escape your lips. “Are you serious?”
He shrugs.
“Nam Joon, you’re holding my hand, spitting on my pussy, and about to watch me finger myself… Me asking you if you’re horny is where you’re deciding this is ridiculous—”
“___, just fucking cum already.”
Instantly, you roll your eyes at him.
The attitude.
He needs his dick sucked or something.
In response, you wiggle your fingers at him. He gives you a blank expression and turns away for a moment. You take that as your sign to start. With one finger, you insert it inside you. Your pussy clenches and your reaction extends to you squeezing Nam Joon’s hand. As you finger yourself, you try to focus on hitting your climax.
It’s much more frustrating than it is easy. The man whose cock you desperately want inside of you is just fucking standing there while your fingers do you no justice.
So, in the silence of your dimly lit bedroom, you shut your eyes and imagine him more intensely. You imagine Nam Joon’s fingers inside you. You imagine how his lips would feel against your skin. How his soft tongue would feel like giving your clit kitten licks. You moan at the very thought, and get excited over the fact that he’s actually here. Even though he’s not touching you the way you want right now, at least he was here.
He was watching.
Listening to every whimper.
Every breathy utter of his name.
Then, you feel the sensation in between your legs take over. You pump your fingers faster and lazily begin to rub yourself to finish off. You squirm, murmuring his name in between breaths.
Nam Joon can’t stop watching the way your pussy spreads and how tiny your fingers are. Every time you squeeze his hand, his eyes dart to the way your pussy gets more swollen. On top of that, he loves the way your chest rises. Your nipples are so fucking hard right now.
He’d kill to lick them.
To bite them.
To suck on them.
Fuck it.
Maybe he should fold.
So lost in thought, he misses it. In a blink of an eye, you cum and let out a lewd moan. As you catch your breath, you let go of his hand and massage your pussy.
“Are you finished?” Nam Joon asks.
You let out a dramatic sigh. “Yeah, I guess. It was fun but honestly? I’m still horny.”
“Not good enough?”
“You tell me,” you grab his hand and tug him to your pussy.
He didn’t expect it.
It’s too late for him. By the time he registered what you were doing, his fingers were already inbetween your folds. You hold his wrist and control the way he touches you. Dragging his hands up and down, you feel tingles begin again.
“See? I came, right?”
“Y-yeah,” Nam Joon stutters for the first time tonight. “So wet.”
You scoff. “I usually cum more than this… This is so weird! I don’t get what I did wrong. I thought of you as usual—”
“Princess…” He takes his hand away, signaling you that you’re crossing the line. Shrugging, you offer him an innocent look. “Don’t.”
“Taste me,” you suggest. “If you don’t like the way I taste then you can go back to your little spot over there and do whatever you want. You can keep listening and watching me pleasure myself… But just know, I won’t cum for a long time. I’m horny as fuck but I just can’t get off all by myself! It’s too hard… Deal?”
“Deal? You’re insane,” he grumbles. “Do you hear yourself?”
“I do…” you assure him. “Do you hear me? Because it doesn’t have to be like that. You can stand over there—hey, I’ll even let you jerk off—or you can do it yourself. Make me cum. Fuck me as hard as you can. Take what you want. Your choice.”
Nam Joon gulps as you sit up and wrap your arms around his neck. Tilting your head at him, you look into his eyes and wait for his decision.
Nam Joon waits for a second too long.
Your gaze softens as you take his silence as a no. That’s okay. You can just keep touching yourself and drag it out longer. It’d be fun for you anyway… This was his loss.
As you pull away, just as you’re about to lay down, Nam Joon cups your cheeks and crashes his lips against yours. He kisses you deep, slipping his tongue in. You waste no time, finding his tongue and sucking on it as he pull away for air. You smile against his kiss, and continue to make out with him. His hands travel from your cheeks to your breast and holy shit.
You’re so fucking happy.
He palms your breasts and pays special attention to your nipples. They’re so hard and sensitive. He knows it. So, he takes his time.
First, he pitches them lightly. You gasp and he laughs into the kiss. Mumbling, “sorry, sorry… my bad, princess,” into your kiss. He runs his thumb over your nipples, stimulating your drive evn more. He then twists them and earns another gasp from you. This time, a moan follows. Next, he cups your entire breast with his hands and squeezes them. Pulling away from the kiss, he scrunches your top over your breasts and dives in.
He licks your nipples, slaps your breasts, and bites them.
God, when he bites them—
“O-okay, okay,” you stop him, “gonna need you to start fucking me or else I’m gonna cum with you just doing this.”
“Like me that much?” he teases.
You glare at him. “Might lose interest after seeing your dick though.”
With that, Nam Joon folds.
He towers over you, as your hands instantly make their way to unbutton his shirt. Midway through, he kisses you. It’s deep and desperate—like he has wanted this for so long too.
When his shirt is off, you move on to unbuckle his belt. You do it as quickly as possible, ever so happy to finally be able to see his length. Taking his pants off, he tosses them aside.
You can’t believe it.
His cock is so perfect.
It’s chiseled like it’s meant to be art.
“Okay, y-yeah,” you choke. “I’m interested.”
Before he can even respond, Nam Joon throws his head back from the pleasure of you sucking his dick. Holy shit, you just went for it.
As your mouth wraps around his tip, you take in how he tastes. The precum that sat in the crease of his tip was a little salty. He tastes even better the more you suck. His cock in your mouth is so big. It’s full, girthy, and long. Without needing to try, his length hits the back of your throat multiple times. With teary eyes, you gag, choke, and slobber all of his fat cock.
Like a fucking dog.
Like a fucking bitch.
Like his fucking whore.
Nam Joon loves the sight.
He takes a handful of your hair and fucks himself deeper in your pretty mouth. This time, when his cock hits the back of your throat, he holds you still. You breathe in through your nose, sucking as much of him as you can. When you let out an intense gasp for air, he pulls away and feels his stomach twist as strings of your saliva drip.
Nam Joon repositions you.
He lays down on his back and places you on top of him. There, you let your hands roam his chest as he helps you take your shorts off. His pecks are large and rock-hard. You love the way they feel and as he takes heavy breaths in, you note the way his abs flex.
It’s such a beautiful sight.
“This is what you wanted, right?” Nam Joon scoffs, as he reaches for his dick. He pumps himself lazily before placing it at your entrance. “Want me so bad? Let’s see how much. Do you think you can last bouncing on my cock? You barely lasted 10 minutes fingering yourself. You were thinking about me too, right? Holding my hand and shit? Have you always been a fucking whore?”
You pout, nodding. “Yeah. I am such a fucking whore for you… I’ve been so patient. Did I wait well?”
Without warning, Nam Joon slaps you in the face.
“This is about me,” he growls. “You want me. You have me. You get to fuck me. Get that? You waited, and you got the prize. Me. Shut the fuck up and do your fucking job, slut. I’ll praise you when I want. Don’t ask for it. Understand?”
You nod.
He slaps your face again.
“Answer me, bitch.”
You bite your bottom lip. “I understand.”
“Good,” Nam Joon says, satisfied. “Whenever you’re ready…”
You purse your lips, asking for one more kiss. He kisses you, and as he does so, you take his cock and try to put it in. For some reason, perhaps because of how wet you are, his cock keeps slipping or your hole is just too fucking small for him. When he realizes what’s going on, he sits up a little.
In a low tone, he offers, “Here, I’ll help you put it in.”
You look at him as he guides it in. You watch how soft his gaze turns the minute you sink into his member. You swear he feels the butterflies too. As you adjust to his size, you begin to move a little. Rolling your hips, you also add a little bounce. For stability, you place your hands on his chest.
“That’s it,” he moans, “my slut is such a good girl.”
“Mhmm,” you breathe, “s-so good. You fill me up so good, Joon.”
As you ride him, you begin to feel more and more desperate for his cock to fuck you. This entire time, you had been doing all the work and goddamn it’s fucking exhausting. You slam your pussy onto his dick visciously, picking up the pace and trying to catch your orgasm—but you get so fucking tired.
It’s so annoying.
“I—” you cry, “a-agghhh!”
“I got you.”
Suddenly, Nam Joon wraps his arms around your body and holds you tight. It’s like a hug, but as he does it, he drills his fucking cock into you. Like never before, you feel his length reach spots you missed as you rode him. Nam Joon drills like there’s no tomorrow. It’s so rough and intense, he slaps your ass while he’s at it. You’re constantly moaning, and at this point—
“You like it like this, little slut? Such a fucking whore for wanting it like this… Gonna take my cum? Gonna get so fucked up you can’t walk tomorrow?”
“Mhmmm,” you sob. “Yes, I want it like this. J-just like that! Fuck yes, yes, yes!”
“You think about this, huh? Always imagining how it’d be like for me to fuck you? Are you happy now? Are you fucking happy? Greedy little bitch always gets what she wants, huh?”
“So happy,” you gasp. “I love your cock. You’re so good to me, Joon.”
Something inside him flips. He loves the way you say his name. He loves the way this feels and is even more in love with the way that it’s with you. With that being said…
He fucks you harder.
Rough, sloppy, messy.
It’s so fucking good that you grip onto his hair and let out a few sobs. You murmur his name into his ear and your pussy clenches every time he kisses you. You bury your face in the crook of his neck and concentrate on how blissful this all is. After a few moments—
“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god—”
You cum.
But it doesn’t stop there.
Even though you came, he didn’t.
Nam Joon continues to fuck you through your orgasm as he reaches his. Feeling the sensation, he curls his toes and digs his cock deep into you as he releases. Nam Joon stuffs his cum inside you, and pumps in and out a few more times.
Then, he leaves it inside.
As his cum spills, he keeps his cock inside you. Too tired to pull out, but also too in his head. He wants this to last longer than it has. He wants it again if possible… But that’s asking for too much. He knows it.
Without exchanging any words, you lift your face and lean in. You and Nam Joon make out, nice and slow. It’s so opposite from what you two were just doing… But it was nice. You even play with his hair as you two kiss. He likes it. You know he does because he smirks against your lips.
When you pull away, it’s like a wave of emotions hit Nam Joon.
What the fuck did he just do?
He isn’t sure what to say or to do… All he knows is that it was good. It was fun. He had wanted this moment for a while too. Is that something he should regret? Getting what he has wanted and waited for? He doesn’t know.
As you two lay beside one another, you reach for him and curl into his embrace. Quickly, you fall asleep. The entire thing tired you out. Nam Joon contemplates if he should get up and resume to his usual service… Or should he just lay here? Be with you?
Was that an option?
Either way, he knows one things for sure…
He’d be here in the morning.
To protect you.
To fuck you.
To be yours.
#bts one shot#nam joon smut#rm x yn#rm smut#rm bodyguard au#bts smut#bts scenario#nam joon scenario#nam joon fanfic#nam joon imagine#bts imagine#bts pwp#rm pwp
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10 // series m.list
taglist closed !
taglist: @bloopkook @pb-n-juju @taetaecatboy @ellesalazar @joonsjuice @firesighgirl @cursedcursives @whoa-jo @yoongukie-ff @jihopesjoint @mint--yoongs @xxxanimangxxx @floweryjeons
note: thank you for your patience with this mini fic!!
The end of a semester is usually your favourite time of the year for obvious reasons: academic freedom, one year closer to your degree, and summer vacation. Summer rings in new fun, new travels, new people.
Perhaps, a new love.
Summer time also meant more time to see Nam Joon. As your friendgroup tends to be more clingy with the hot atmosphere, something about the idea of this summer with Nam Joon makes you feel weird. It doesn’t excite or repulse you.. Instead, it makes you feel confused.
It’s inevitable that your mind is clouded with petty thoughts and sadness. After all that has happened; you’re so burnt out from studying alone and sinking into the bitter feeling of needing to prove people wrong.
The truth is; you’re not that dumb.
You’re merely average.. Putting in the work simply isn’t your forte.
What you hate is when people make you feel stupid.
Nam Joon, regardless of the many insults, has never made you feel stupid until the day you knocked on his door in the pouring rain. When you had asked him if he had feelings for you and he looked at you like you couldn’t possibly know—it hurt.
Did he think you were that stupid? Stupid enough that you couldn’t comprehend the difference between lies and truth? The difference between feelings and lust? The lines are thin… But not invisible.
Invisible is what you felt.
Nam Joon sure had a talent for making you feel a million little things. From sex to the actual friendship—he has always had a way with you… And just like that, as you exit your lecture building with your exam mark in your hands—you see him.
He stands there, leaning against a campus pole, arms crossed with his a little smile to greet you with. Nam Joon raises his hand and waves at you. He does his best to look nonchalant as he fights the urge to run to you.
Oh, if only he could run to you.
It’s like his breath is taken from him the moment your eyes meet his. He wants to take your hand and be with you so bad.. To be with you as if nothing happened and he could erase every dumb thing he ever said and did to you.
But he doesn’t.
Instead, he lets the moment sink and ache. In response to his presence, you roll your eyes at him. Then, you let out a sigh, turn the other cheek, and begin to walk to the opposite direction. It’s then when Nam Joon realizes that you’ve figured it out.
The truth is; he has always been the dumb one between you two.
“Are you gonna follow me inside too or are we done?”
Your harsh tone catches Nam Joon off guard. He lifts his head from looking at his feet. The entire way here, he has been watching his feet follow yours. He looked like a lost puppy, trying to keep it’s distance but also so desperate to be loved and taken.
He didn’t mean to come off like a creep. This entire walk has been so painful and slow. Yet, he found comfort in just being within your reach. Even if you didn’t need him or didn’t even turn your head back once to check on him—he’d still follow you to wherever.
To the end of the earth.
To where your heart had wandered off to.
To wherever you go; he would follow.
Nam Joon has always loved that about you. The way your certainty leaked and inspired him to be the same regardless of the logistics of the decisions. Your love to live life is contagious. He never truly feels like he’s living if he’s not with you. He needs you.
As he wraps up his train of thoughts, Nam Joon clears his throat to answer.
You beat him to it.
“Go home, Nam Joon. Have a good summer. I’ll see you around,” you dismiss him. As you turn away, he catches your wrist and holds you still.
“I called you.”
You stiffen, surprised he’s even talking right now. He has never been the type to touch you in public. It was exactly in his character to follow you around and not say a thing… But this? You stare at his hands wrapped around your wrist. When was the last time you two touched? Before you get dizzy from your own thoughts, you defend yourself: “I was taking the exam. Can’t use my phone—”
“I called you last night. Seven times. I left voice messages and even texted you after you told me to fuck off. I asked around for your professors morning routine so I could stall him because I was afraid you’d be late to the exam or needed at least a fifteen minute review with your classmates. I stalled him for twenty-three minutes. I stood outside, in this fucking heat, waiting for you to come out and... I don’t know? Look at me? Talk to me? You walked away. You told me to fuck off. Now, you’re telling me to go home and that you’ll see me around?” Nam Joon’s voice hitches at the end. “I don’t want to just see you around. I want more than that.”
You look at him, eyebrows furrowed together. “Get lost.”
“You’re doing it again.”
“Get lost.”
He shakes his head.
“Where you go, I go.”
You glare at him.
Fine, two can play this game.
“And if I go to Hobi? You owe me a boyfriend, by the way.”
Nam Joon lets go of your wrist. Slightly hurt, he asks: “you still like him?”
“Who else am I supposed to like?”
“Me.”
In this moment, you see something in him that you’ve never seen before.
Honesty.
Before you can say anything, your phone chimes with a notification. Quickly, you take your phone out and check.
EXAM RESULTS: Available
“My grade came in,” you breathe. “Fuck. Why did they mark it so fast?”
“Wasn’t it just scantron, dummy?” he teases, peaking his head over to see your phone. You tilt your phone towards you and side eye him. What if you failed? That’d be such an embarrassing grade for him to witness you receive!
Hell fucking no.
“Okay, okay... Check your grade, beautiful.”
Instantly, you look at him in shock. His cheeks flush in pink but he doesn’t take what he called you back. He meant it. Nam Joon offers a shy smile and looks into the distances, trying to downplay your reaction.
As you sign in to check your results, he continues to be the smartass that he is. “Wanna know a secret? When I took this class last sem, I got a 89.2% on the final. It was kind of hard.. Like, I remember actually being stumped on the questions. If you have to retake the class; I promise I’ll be by your side. It’s a hard class! I know at least two other people that had to retake it—what? Did you pass?”
You stare at him blankly.
A part of you tries to process his comforting promise while the other part of you gets lost his eyes. They look so desperate and sparkly—almost like they’re in love.
Could they be?
… Focus.
You check your grade. It reads:
EXAM RESULTS: Available
93.6% PASS.
“___? Are you okay? Was the exam that bad?” he begins to panic. Without thinking twice, he pulls you close to take a peak. You shut your phone screen off and shake your head at him.
“Come on, ___! What did you get?”
You shrug at him, staying emotionless. Your feelings are beginning to overwhelm you, but you need to stabilize them for the sake of whatever is going on between you and him.
You stay silent. Eyes soft, almost watering from the relief you feel. Fuck, you worked so hard. You feel so accomplished.
On the other hand, Nam Joon feels like he’s been kicked in the stomach. He feels so much guilt. Did you fail because of him? He doesn’t know what to say or to do. It’s a good thing Hobi advised him not to bring flowers... Instead, Nam Joon brought his entire heart. Even if he doesn’t say it, he knows it’s yours and that, my friends, is way better than flowers.
“Tell me or I’ll kiss you—”
“I didn’t do that well,” you pout, crossing your arms. You decide to commit to your lie purely because of the way his expression softened.
He’s cute.
“What now? You going to call me stupid? You going to fuck around with my feelings again and—”
Nam Joon crashes his lips onto yours. Without much thought, you sink into it and feel butterflies as he wraps his arms around your waist. When he pulls away, he fixes your hair and cups your cheeks.
“You did well, ___.”
Pouting, you push him off of you. Somehow, he takes a hold of your hand and stands there innocently. You tilt your head at him completely confused.
“What does this mean?”
“You’re smart,” Nam Joon teases, dipping his head low and pressing a kiss on your cheek. “Figure it out.”
#bts fic#nam joon fic#nam joon tutor#nam joon angst#nam joon imagine#rm fic#rm fake texts#bts fake scenarios#rm x yn
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01 // series m.list
taglist request: send a request with the title of this fic “f2f” // please DO NOT comment here or on the series . it gets confusing and i prefer answering and tagging through asks
taglist: @bloopkook @pb-n-juju @taetaecatboy @ellesalazar @joonsjuice
#bts fic#bts smau#nam joon scenario#nam joon x oc#rm smut#rm imagine#rm x yn#rm fake texts#namjoon fake texts#nam joon fwb#hoseok x yn
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04 // series m.list
taglist request: send a request with the title of this fic “f2f” // please DO NOT comment here or on the series . it gets confusing and i prefer answering and tagging through asks
taglist: @bloopkook @pb-n-juju @taetaecatboy @ellesalazar @joonsjuice @firesighgirl @cursedcursives @whoa-jo @yoongukie-ff @jihopesjoint
warning: oc throws up twice !
note: unedited :>
Nam Joon is an asshole but at least he is self aware.
Unlike most of his friends who often come off pretentious, he has always tried to protect his peace with his rude exterior. It’s not like he didn’t respect others... It was more because it was the easiest way to push people away.
That’s exactly what he knew he’d have to do with you.
Meeting you, as brief as it was; changed his life forever.
Prior to meeting you, he had never felt his heart be moved. Not by beauty or by flowery words; but by a person’s simple smile and aura. It was you that moved him deeply. So much so that his feet felt like they were floating above the ground and if he didn’t act out to save himself from being too in his head; he’d be done for.
If Nam Joon wasn’t so self aware; he would have confessed so long ago. Instead, he waited. Instead, he continued to be that annoying, smart-ass that you’d look for in friendgroup hangouts. He’d remain that friend you’d want approval from because he kept you humble.
Yet, maybe humble is an understatement.
Sometimes, his comments did go too far. Sometimes, he did make you feel dumb. But it never hurt your ego to the point where you’d hate him. No, it just felt like a middle school love affair. Like he was the boy that pulled your hair just to get you upset. Like he wanted you to cry only for him to comfort you instantly.
It’s immature.
It’s toxic.
It’s Nam Joon.
Your expectations of him have always been low. He’s always been the kind to shy away from events, but everyone would want him there because if he showed up... It’d be valid. Having him tutor you has to be one of your smarter moves as it seems to be working well for you two. Nam Joon, aside from texting, has awfully been decently pleasant... It’s as good as it can get.
The first time you two slept together was out of pure boredom. You were over at Jungkook’s and he happened to be there with the others. Everyone was busy playing games or cooking, meanwhile you and Nam Joon got buzzed. From there, he let a few words slip out of his mouth that led to you letting him slip his dick inside you.
“It’s fucking irritating,” he sighed.
“What is?” you nudged him, in attempt to pry for more of his words. He turned to you and looked at you deeply. It made your heart flutter from what you can remember.
With shaky eyes, he exhaled; “how pretty you are. How bad I want you. How... You’re just... Everything. I think you’re perfect.”
To be frank, that night went by fast. You two scrambled to a bedroom upstairs, hit it and quit it. You two went back downstairs to join everyone after an hour and pretended like nothing ever happened. For a few weeks he avoided you and you brushed it off. Suddenly, then all at once, he acted normal again and so did you.
Tonight, to Nam Joon, reminds him a lot of the first time you two slept together.
Partly because the same people were around and partly because you look just as beautiful as that night. As he finds you sitting in the corner with your knees to your chest, he feels it again.
His heart moves and his feet float above the ground.
He doesn’t know how he manages to get through the crowd and get to you. He just does. When he does, he crouches in front of you.
Poking you, he begins to nag. “What are you doing here, dummy? You might get stepped on. Let’s go—”
“Arghhh,” you groan, pushing him away. He catches your wrists and holds you still. Lifting your head up, you greet him with a tired smile. “You?”
“Me,” he confirms with a soft tone. “Sorry to disappoint you.”
You shake your head profusely. “I’m happy you’re here.”
“You are?”
“Mhmm,” you gulp. “Hobi’s been ignoring me. I waved at him then he smiled and looked away. I drank like four of these, by the way!”
Nam Joon’s eyes flicker to the empty red cups around you. He thinks to himself, shit. Of course Hobi would ignore you right now. You’re practically wasted and he’d actually die if his reputation was tainted with someone who was an inch short of perfection.
Before Nam Joon can say anything, your body suddenly leans forward and crashes against his. Though he’s a little startled, he wraps his arms around you to hold you up. Your body slumps as your head continues to spin.
“I need to throw up,” you choke. “I’m sorry.”
Nam Joon shakes his head, tucking your hair behind your ears. “Don’t be sorry, it’s okay. I’m here, ___. I’ll take care of you.”
Nam Joon finds a bathroom for you and locks the doors as you kneel in front of the toilet. You begin to gag and as soon as the fluids come up, Nam Joon rushes to your side and holds your hair back.
He pats your back and looks away. In all honesty, he’s not grossed out. Throw up is throw up. It’s simple biology and he would rather that you throw up than for you to feel sick for the rest of the night and possibly tomorrow morning.
As you finish up, you catch your breath and groan. After flushing, Nam Joon hands you toilet paper to wipe around your mouth. You sit still, eyes teary and lips puffy from everything.
“Why are you being so nice to me? You’re usually meaner than this.”
Your curiosity gets the best of you. Leaning against the bathtub, you throw your head back and just stare at the ceiling. Partly to compose yourself and partly to avoid Nam Joon’s eyes. For some reason, it feels like you could cry.
“I’m always nice to you.”
You snort at his reply.
“Where’s Hobi?”
“Avoiding you.”
You plop yourself up and glare at him. “See? Mean.”
Nam Joon chuckles and takes a seat next to you. You shift, making space for him. He points below your chin and out of instinct, you look down. He lifts his finger and tilts your chin up and grins.
“Dummy.”
You roll your eyes, finding it hard to believe that you fell for that!
“Why are you here?” you ask him. “It’s not like I’m in the mood to fuck and it’s not like you’re Hobi’s servant. What gives?”
He shrugs. “Can’t I just be a friend?”
Your eyes widen. “You are a friend! Just not... This kind.”
Nam Joon pouts at you. “I literally held your hair back while you threw up two days worth of food. Can’t you at least say thank you?”
“Thank you,” you snicker. “Thank you for being a decent friend for once.”
He salutes you. “Never again.”
With that, you both let out a light laugh. When it dies down, you let out a big sigh. “Okay, for real... What do you want, Nam Joon?”
Then, for the first time in a while, he really looks at you. He looks at you and it feels like he could get lost in your glossy eyes. He bites his bottom lip from letting any secrets spill out. He curls his hands into a fist and then relaxes them. Nam Joon feels the tightness in his chest increase but decides to digress.
Tonight isn’t the night.
Right now isn’t the moment.
Perhaps, another time. Perhaps then, he’d tell you the truth. For now, he puts his heart aside and puts you first.
“Nothing.”
You groan, not buying his bullshit. “What is it? You want me to tell you that you were right?”
He looks at you confused.
“Right about what?” he questions, completely lost.
You roll your eyes and cross your arms. “Even though Hobi ditched me tonight and left me with you, he was still trying to look out for me. Therefore, he’d be a good boyfriend, right?”
Nam Joon instantly feels hurt. It feels like you just disregarded his efforts for the sole purpose of saving Hobi’s face. He can’t hold his words back; “Hobi ditches you and you still think he’d be a good boyfriend?”
You shrug, “I don’t know.”
“What about me, then?” Nam Joon almost chokes on his own words. Too late to take them back, he presses forward; “___, I’m the one that held your hair back. I’m the one here with you. Do you still think the same? Do you still think I’d be an awful boyfriend?”
“I think I... Uh, Nam Joon—”
“—It’s yes or no, ___.”
You gulp, feeling a lump in your throat form. The uneasy feeling kicks in and you cover your mouth. Hurriedly, you cry; “... I have to throw up again.”
As Nam Joon holds your hair back for the second time tonight, he wonders if he’s that bad. He wonders if maybe he had distanced himself a little too far from you. He wonders if he pulls you closer from this moment on... Could you be his soon? Even throwing up and making excuses for his reputation sensitive friend—you’re perfect.
You’re simply everything.
It’s then that Nam Joon begins to feel sick himself.
#nam joon scenario#rm fic#rm x yn#namjoon x reader#bts fic#bts scenario#bts college au#nam joon college au#nam joon tutor#nam joon fwb
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06 // series m.list
taglist request: send a request with the title of this fic “f2f” // please DO NOT comment here or on the series . it gets confusing and i prefer answering and tagging through asks
taglist: @bloopkook @pb-n-juju @taetaecatboy @ellesalazar @joonsjuice @firesighgirl @cursedcursives @whoa-jo @yoongukie-ff @jihopesjoint @mint--yoongs@mint--yoongs @xxxanimangxxx @floweryjeons
playlist !!!
#bts fic#bts smau#bts fake texts#nam joon fake texts#nam joon scenario#rm fic#rm smut#rm insta#hobi x yn#hobi scenario#hobi fake texts
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03 // series m.list
taglist request: send a request with the title of this fic “f2f” // please DO NOT comment here or on the series . it gets confusing and i prefer answering and tagging through asks
taglist: @bloopkook @pb-n-juju @taetaecatboy @ellesalazar @joonsjuice @firesighgirl @cursedcursives @whoa-jo @yoongukie-ff @jihopesjoint
#bts fic#bts smau#bts fake texts#hobi x yn#rm x yn#rm smut#nam joon x oc#nam joon x reader#nam joon texts#rm scenario
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05 // series m.list
taglist request: send a request with the title of this fic “f2f” // please DO NOT comment here or on the series . it gets confusing and i prefer answering and tagging through asks
taglist: @bloopkook @pb-n-juju @taetaecatboy @ellesalazar @joonsjuice @firesighgirl @cursedcursives @whoa-jo @yoongukie-ff @jihopesjoint @mint—yoongs @xxxanimangxxx
#bts fic#bts smau#knj fic#nam joon fic#nam joon imagine#hobi x nam joon x reader#hobi x yn#rm x yn#rm x reader#rm scenario#bts fake texts
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