#my first post about dream was. 2021 is this guy hated all the fucking time like this how are any of you snae
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i was mainly a redditor starting june 2021 (horrible timing), lurked on twitter (all around horrible at any time) then joined tumblr in april (horrible timing but this place was nice) and stayed. still too nervy to be actively participating but who knows, im more open to it now then i would’ve been with um. the prior state. genuinely, u guys are awesome and make it a fun place to spend my time :)
im glad you're having fun !! that's what a fandom is for
#your timing tho..im laffing a bit#my first post about dream was. 2021 is this guy hated all the fucking time like this how are any of you snae#sane#i wonder if i could find it#asknootfound
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tagged to post my 9 favourite album with commentary by @mathewbaldzal !!!! we r two peas in a pod i think with having a lot to say about some tunes...
in no particular order...
different class (1995) - pulp. this is not my no1 album of all time because i don't have a favorite album of all time, but this album is in part representative of "getting into music" to me. i love 90s britpop, whatever that means for a random american and this is my fav of em all (though i do actually quite rate this is hardcore in pulp's discography). "common people" is one of the songs of ALL TIME. god jarvis's little sing-song sleazyness gets me. really, really, really great classic performance of it at glasto 1995...for some reason "pencil skirt" also always really hits.
home video (2021) - lucy dacus. the newest album on this list by a long shot, but it's had songs in my top5 year end lists since it came out. i've also seen lucy live <3. this album rises above some of the others in similar company (punisher - phoebe bridgers, the boygenius ep, etc) because i never get tired of it. "first time" "hot & heavy" "brando" and "triple dog dare" are nearly always standbys in my listening history. probably gonna be an album-i-listened-to-in-college classic forever...
songs of love and hate (1971) - leonard cohen. maybe none of my favorite leonard cohen songs are on this album, but as a single work, this album stuns me. possibly the most transfixing 44:21 i've ever heard. his lyricism in particular is -- i can't even describe it. the mix with his voice, the sparseness of the instrumentation at time, the harmonies. i'm not a big stories guy but in this, yeah, the songwriting, the stories. i don't think there's another album like this one out there, really.
if you're feeling sinister (1998) - belle & sebastian. the first time i heard this album, i thought i had never heard an album so perfect. i love songs off of it but i nearly always listen to it whole. i love, love, love b&s's early sound (twee, if you will), and stuart murdoch's lyrics really, really shine. this is one of my favorite albums to listen to when i have a headache because it's lovely to just, focus on but not grating at all. i really love "judy and the dream of horses" and "get me away from here i'm dying". really, a beautiful work
rumours (1977) - fleetwood mac. i was sort of scrolling through some of my playlists trying to decide what to put on this list (it's a bit weighted towards stuff that's in rotation now) and i couldn't leave off fleetwood mac (in part to represent the huge part of my music taste that is like. classics 1965-1980). stevie nicks was one of my earlier music obsessions (the OG was the beatles). so many wonderful songs and riffs. i know this was left off the original 12-inch but "silver springs" is one of my favorite songs forever and ever and ever...
nebraska (1982) - bruce springsteen. when it comes down to it, this is my favorite springsteen album. i do think his 1975-1987 run of albums is pretty much perfect but nebraska is a masterpiece in a way that i find hard to express in words. there's a sense of sparseness and distance in this work (in part bc of how it was recorded) that i find so utterly compelling i can't even describe. "nebraska" - especially this 1984 live version - is a perfect song to me. perfect. i also like a lot of the stuff that went into inspiring this album (notably flannery o'connor) and well. where it fits into springsteen's narritivization of his own life (dude was in the dumps).
all killer, no filler (2001) - sum41. this pick is a little bit representative of the era of my life where i basically exclusively listened to pop punk but if songs of love and hate is an album that's perfectly drawn out, this is an album that's perfectly compressed. like, the title is correct. this album is fucking TIGHT. i used to listen to it at a job i hated to make the 30-min intervals go by. and it's got such classics...."fat lip"..."motivation..." of course, "in too deep." SO good.
what did you expect from the vaccines? (2011) - the vaccines. maybe this pick is a tiny bit cheesy but it is a perfect encapsulation of the era of alt rock it came from. which i love. i really like the vaccines, i think they're super fun and i did see them in concert finally and they totally lived up to that. "wetsuit" is again...one of my favorite songs of all time. "if you wanna" is a perpetual banger.
age of consent (1983) - new order. again, an album that deserves to be listened to whole, despite how good "age of consent" hits alone ever single time. sometimes i think i like another new order album more than this, but i don't. sumner's voice just out-of-tune ringing out over that sound, that new order sound, the bass, that post-punk club vibe. they're a band that don't sound like anyone else, and this is the album most indicative of that. wow, every time.
a few narrow misses
boxer (2007) - the national. i didn't get the national until one day i did. "slow show." my god. hello.
very (1993) - pet shop boys. it's too simple to say this is an album about gay love because it's so embedded in it's context but. this is an album with so much love. psb are brilliant.
the execution of all things (2002) - rilo kiley. jenny lewis CALL ME. also like. you know "a better son/daughter". there's more.
a thousand suns (2010) - linkin park. i used to listen to this at 6th grade cross-country practice. first band i ever got into on my own. idk.
this is not only my favorite albums but a pretty decent summation of the broad strokes my overall taste. thank you again for the tag!! i enjoyed doing this a lot :). idk who has done this/on what blogs so if u have PLEASEEEEE send it to me i want to see!! i tag @lfcrobbo @upthebrackets @girlfriendline @odegoob @amandaleveille @thelittlebirdthatkeptsomanywarm @kritischetheologie @bright-and-burning @a-corn-field if any of u want to but no presh!!!
#i HAVE been listening to albums off some of these that i've seen ppl do (sez i've only listened to wisecrack but more of urs r on my list)#and there have been notable instances of me falling in LOVE with albums off things like these others have done (c mentioning the midnight#organ fight and passive me aggressive you which have become mainstays for me lol)#SO like always if u wanna chat about music or rec me things i'm so here lololol#shshshsh why did i think i had to tag 9 ppl i'm sitting there like oh gotta get 9 and then realized it's just however many u want.#well i want to know everything about all music taste ever so 9 it is...#tag game#yahooo!!!! <33333333333
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let's talk: canon events! how'd you get into the dream team? what brought you to dtblr?
real ones knows i was a bit of an anti once upon a time LMAO not in the sense of running bitchless hate campaigns, but i was Sick To Death of hearing about dream/dsmp and had heard enough passing bullshit about dream being a twat (generally for various misinfo reasons) that i was like Yeah fuck that guy, he's annoying,
in 2020 i was a pretty devout watcher of the eboys channel (rip), and half of why i was aggravated by mcyt content was because a lot of the (admittedly tiny) fandom i was in was shifting over to watch the dsmp instead. the boys also collabed with some of the dsmp people here and there (much to my chagrin), but that wound up being my introduction to dream himself. he was in the eboys vs dsmp video, and i distinctly remember hearing him speak for the first time and thinking ... 'this is it? this is the big scary arrogant douchebag? but he sounds like a little guy ???'
the direct exposure piqued my curiosity, even if i was reluctant to admit it lol i listened to the eboys podcast with him as a guest, and that did a lot more to thaw me to him. it also drove me to look into some of the discourse surrounding his assorted faux-pas, and i soon learned that a lot of it was taken out of context or wholly exaggerated. he wasn't perfect, no, but he certainly wasn't an evil mastermind either. i tried watching some of his own videos after that - pretty sure i started with the mc unsolved series, for whatever reason - and it was all downhill from there 😭
originally i tried to make a twt account to join the fandom, but as anyone can prob attest to, it's Very Difficult to break in there without being industry planted. being more familiar with tumblr in general, i decided to make a brand new blog so that i could interact without connecting things to my old (mostly defunct) main blog. i mainly wanted to post art, but i started with a few gifsets, which helped to meet a few people and make some mutuals. that was back in april 2021, and ... here i still am, despite everything 😅
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...what uh...what happened in january? /gq
-@robs-sideblobs (new to the fandom as of like, june)
(actual explanation under the cut 😭)
okay disclaimer: this happened ages ago and it’s unique in the sense that it pretty much never breached containment, so it wasn’t documented and everyone who was there kinda agreed not to talk about it anymore. so this is all just based on what i can remember, i don’t have receipts or anything (but i don’t mind you asking at all! i hate when people gatekeep stuff i wasn’t there for so i’m happy to explain, just wanna be clear why people are so hush hush about it)
so in november 2021 this guy popped up on twitter called manatreed who was an up-and-coming faceless streamer (he’d been posting sporadically since june, but people only started noticing then). and this was the era where dream team christmas was still a possibility, so people started putting the pieces together: faceless white guy in florida, has dream’s exact pair of arthritis gloves, wears the same clothing brand sapnap does, claims to be a streamer but never promoted a twitch, followed by/has dms with dream and sapnap and interactions with a lot of big ccs + ANNOUNCED TO BE JOINING THE DSMP despite having No content whatsoever, “manatreed” is an almost exact anagram of “dream team”, irl name is ollie and his first tweet was on the day sapnap posted a video of him doing an ollie (YES some of these are reaches but they’re all things people were saying) and most damning of all, dream hadn’t said “it’s not me /srs” even though he normally hates people impersonating him. what if....... this was dream?
and then manatreed says he’ll do his first stream when he hits 300k on twitter, and two months go by, and in january he hits 300k on twitter and goes live on the dsmp. and it’s... not dream. it’s just a guy. who isn’t dream. OKAY. he and dream explain (i think-- i don’t remember this part super clearly) that they were old friends who reconnected when mana wanted to start content creation, and dream agreed to give him a boost. which, okay. still fucking wild but it’s less weird if he isn’t Just Some Guy. and i was a twitter stan at the time (lurking on dtblr), but people on my tl really warmed up to him. i was pretty indifferent, but he seemed sweet enough, so sure, whatever. he ended the stream an hour or two later and we assumed he’d be continuing with content creation
and this is the part i’m gonna have to be really vague about unfortunately because a lot of it hinges on doxxed info which i don’t want to spread at all. but very very shortly after that first stream (could’ve been the day after? i’m not sure) a thread came out alleging that manatreed’s real identity was someone with a history of abusing women including an active battery charge, and dream had let mana live in his house and given him an online platform knowing this. again, without going into the info (the fandom, at least on twt, was worryingly willing to hold hands with doxxers and cyberstalkers to get to the bottom of this), the only thing i can really say about my opinion is that given dream’s history as a victim of domestic violence i found it unlikely that he would knowingly harbor and promote an abuser, and that it would be incredibly uncharacteristically stupid if he did know. i also know that the thread coming out was part of a planned takedown by kiwifarms + leaktwt, who have a history of faking things (regardless of whether or not it was true, that’s part of the context of a lot of dream’s controversies in this era). dream’s initial response was.... not good (when people refer to “the gullible tweet” this is what they mean-- he said we were being gullible for believing the accusations and sapnap immediately went live as damage control) but he later wrote a twitlonger which you can read here. recently manatreed’s twitch bio was changed to say that he will not ever be coming back to content creation, and... that was that.
as someone who’s been here since november 2020 i can say january was the worst incident to ever happen-- the fandom recovered, but it���s never really been the same. i think although it ended in a way that was satisfying enough to let most of us continue supporting him, it shook the foundation and the situation happening now is reminding people a lot of that, which might be why the reaction has been so extreme. so yeah! that was january
#i hope this doesn't sound too melodramatic i just wanted to stress that-- yeah people don't like to talk about it#which is why i won't be answering any more asks about this cause it's not a discussion i want to foster#but you're free to dm me if you'd like! i won't share any extra info but i don't mind discussing it one on one#and once again i don't mind you guys asking :] i hope this clears things up#bella answers#anon#robs-sideblobs
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I posted 13,827 times in 2022
That's 13,635 more posts than 2021!
8,736 posts created (63%)
5,091 posts reblogged (37%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@harlowsbby
@jacksmoviestar
@a-moment-captured
@lcandothisallday
I tagged 3,384 of my posts in 2022
#jack harlow - 1,390 posts
#jack harlow concepts - 816 posts
#🌸 anon - 260 posts
#jack harlow imagine - 237 posts
#🧁 anon - 192 posts
#urban - 189 posts
#jack harlow x reader - 181 posts
#🍉anon - 119 posts
#🌎anon - 113 posts
#💕 anon - 90 posts
Longest Tag: 127 characters
#my classmate asked for a ride to school and i was iffy at first but she said she’ll give me gas money so i said alright fuck it
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
Heated
710 notes - Posted August 6, 2022
#4
Angst request: gf yn is on tour with Jack and one of the tour mates is crushing really hard on yn. Jealous Jack. Possessive Jack. Sweetheart yn.
She’s taken
Jack loved you with all his heart he truly did you were the girl of his dreams the sweetheart he’s been manifesting but at the same time he hated the fact that you acted so clueless to when other guys were flirting with you or trying to get at you.
Jack had asked if you wanted to join him on tour and you of course said yes you were beyond thrilled to see everything that went on behind the scenes of everything and seeing your man before every other night was something you wouldn’t wait to see.
You were all in Denver Colorado for Jack’s show that night you were currently sitting with Neelam and Jt just looking at different types of nail designs and hairstyles you all wanted to do for tonight’s show. You were so into the different designs that you didn’t notice one of Jack’s band members trying to get your attention till Jt tapped your shoulder.
“I think he’s trying to talk to you girl.” Looking up you smiled seeing Earl, he was apart of Jack’s live band he was really and always kind to you.
“Oh hi Earl how are you doing? You ready for tonight’s show.”
Neelam and Jt smirked at one another noticing a certain curly headed boyfriend of yours now inspecting Earl and You.
“Yes most definitely I’m always ready to go out there and show out like we always do.” There wasn’t not one mean bone in your body you just loved to spread love and positivity and that was something Jack loved, you always judged by the mind and heart never by how a person looks like or acts like.
“That’s good I’m really excited you do so good on the drums I always wanted to play the drums back in high school.”
“I can always teach you whenever you’re free if you’re down.”
“I’d like that.” He smiled and the two of you continued to talk about anything and everything.
“You just gonna let him sweet talk your girl.?” Nemo came from behind Jack and rubbed on his shoulders. Jack was trying him best to work on being less possessive and protective with you because the last thing he wanted was for you to think he controlled you and controlled who you talked to.
“What am I gonna say Nemo? You know how Y/N is she’ll get mad at me instead of Earl and besides she doesn’t really see the issue I guess.”
“All I’m saying is the way he’s touching up on your girl and being all friendly with her wouldn’t slide with me.” Nemo walked away from Jack leaving him alone in his thoughts as he watched Earl brush his hands on your arms a few times but what did it for Jack was when Earl leaned in to say something in your ear which caused you to start giggling like a fool.
He quickly flung off the couch and started walking towards the two of you.
“Uh oh here comes trouble.” Neelam and Jt both laughed and watched how Jack’s face held a stern and jealousy look.
“May Earl rest easy he lived a good life.” Jt joked the two of them ready for what was about to go down.
“What’s going on over here?” You jumped a bit at the sound of Jack’s voice since you didn’t hear him walking up from behind you.
“Earl was just telling me how he can teach me how to play the drums sometime when we all have downtime that is.” Earl smiled and nodded up at Jack but his smile was quickly replaced by a frown.
Jack rolled his eyes at Earl and held a stern and cold look with him till he felt you tugging on his hoodie, his face softened when he made eye contact with you, something about you always managed to calm him down and he was grateful that you were his light when he had bad days.
“Jack? What’s wrong baby did something happen, did someone say anything to you.” You looked up at him with your big doe eyes your voice sounding so sweet and fragile that Jack almost forgot what he was mad about.
“Uh nothings wrong baby I just came over to see if you wanted to get something to eat before the show?” Jack sighed mentally he knew he should’ve brought up what was bothering him but he wasn’t about to stress the small stuff, he knew you were loyal to him and only him so there was no need to worry.
Smiling you nodded and took his hand in yours before quickly giving Earl a hug goodbye.
“Bye Earl I’ll see you later before the show.” You waved him goodbye and he smiled back before waving bye as well.
“What do you feel like eating Jack?”
“Whatever you want baby.” He brought the back of your hand up to his lips and kissed it before wrapping his left arm around your shoulder and brining you into him.
“This man sure is whipped.” Jt told Neelam as the two of them watched Jack and You leave to go get food.
“He sure is he sure is.”
730 notes - Posted September 10, 2022
#3
concept: smacking jacks ass
but in front of his friends...
“Y/N I swear on everything if you smack my ass in front of the boys ima hurt you baby.” Jack playfully threatened making you pout and hide your hands behind your back.
“Like I’d ever do something like that Jack you know I’d never embarrass you like that.” You lied perfectly straight through your teeth. He nodded scratching his beard and glaring at you slightly.
“For some reason I don’t believe you, if you slap my ass baby I won’t talk to you till next year.” He said before making his way downstairs to where everyone was at.
You smirked knowing full on well you were going to slap his ass in front of them but I mean you couldn’t resist it especially when it looked so round like a peach.
“Damn took y’all long enough I thought y’all was up there fucking like rabbits.” Druski said making everyone laugh meanwhile Jack flipped him off and stood in front of the tv watching the football game.
You couldn’t resist it just seeing how good his ass looked in those gray sweats it was hard not to slap it. Druski looked at you with his eyebrows furrowed as well as Clay and Urban till they saw your right hand lean back and slap Jack’s ass.
Jack yelped at how hard you actually slapped it and turned around quickly and covered his ass.
“Yo what the fuck your girlfriend slaps your ass? I knew your ass was freaky but shit.” Druski laughed making Urban and Clay almost spit out their drinks.
“Shit I didn’t know Y/N was the man of the relationship now.” Urban said making Jack flip him off.
“I just couldn’t help it your ass looked so good in those sweats ba-.” You squealed being lifted up and tossed onto Jack’s shoulder as he carried you upstairs.
“Ima show you who’s the man of this relationship baby I told you that you’d regret it.” Your eyes widened knowing you’d be on bed rest tomorrow.
“Yeah it’s time to head out, y’all want chic-fil-a?” Druski asked Urban and Clay who nodded their heads quickly before heading out.
734 notes - Posted May 25, 2022
#2
imagine jack and reader sitting courtside and the basketball players giving reader all the attention and jack getting fed up😭🤍
Enough is enough
“What’s wrong Jack? Are you not having any fun.” You teased as the grouch next to you groaned and huffed watching all the basketball players come up to you and flirt.
“No I’m not having any fun actually and I’d rather go back home.” He crossed his arms over his chest and pouted like a five year old child.
Tonight Jack wanted to take you on a little date night which consisted of the two of you sitting courtside side at the Golden State Warriors game but the minute the two of you arrived Jack instantly regretted it.
Your outfit was pretty simple nothing too over the top, Jack thought it would be cute if the two of you matched tonight, he wore a Golden State Jersey with his black cargos while you wore a very short short skirt in Jack’s eyes with a crop Golden State t-shirt.
“Jack you don’t see me getting upset when thousands of girls are thirsting over you and throwing themselves at you everyday, besides now you know how it feels.” You mumbled the last part but he heard you loud and clear.
“That’s different though baby, I don’t pay attention to any of them I only pay attention to you and half the time all they want is pictures, but these basketball players they want more then just pictures.”
“Yeah they wanna get between them thighs.” Urban joked from behind the two of you, Sunni chuckled but immediately stop when Jack flared at the two.
“Watch, I bet you one of them comes up to you and tries asking you out as if they don’t know you’re with me.” Jack soon regretted those words because just like magic one of the players known as Jordan Poole came strolling over to where you were all seated.
“Uh oh.” Sunni laughed and watched how Jack’s jaw clenched and unclenched, eyeing Jordan up and down.
“You know this whole time I’ve been trying to focus on the game but your beauty has honestly been distracting me so much.” Jordan grinned and sure you should’ve told him that Jack was your man but where was the fun in that.
“Why thank you Jordan you know I’ve honestly been only watching you all night.” Jack’s head whipped to the side, you stiffed a laugh at how his mouth flung open the shock and hurt evident on his face.
“Is that so pretty lady? Well if you don’t mind would you like to go out or something after the game?” You we’re going to continue teasing Jack and entertaining Jordan but based on the sour look placed on Jack’s face it was best you didn’t.
“I’m sorry Jordan but I do have a boyfriend, he’s right next to me actually.” His smile fell while Jack rolled his eyes, Urban and Sunni laughing like hyenas behind you.
“Oh shit my bad Jack I didn’t even know you had a girl.” Scratching the back of his head awkwardly, Jack shrugged his shoulders and turned to the side.
“I’m sorry.” You mouthed to Jordan as he walked off.
“Damn Y/N just out here pulling all the men tonight.” Sunni laughed but Jack sat there with a irritated expression his face.
“What’s wrong Jack? You know I was only playing with you.”
“Go date your little basketball player I’m sure he’ll show you all around the city.” He huffed and you frowned, when Jack got jealous he tended to take it too far and get in these mood swings.
“Alright ladies and gentlemen who’s ready for the kiss cam?” One of the announcers in the stadium announced over the loud speaker. Everyone laughed and aww’d at all the couples that made it on the kiss cam.
Before you knew it you were looking at your face and as well as Jack’s on the big screen.
“Uh oh is there trouble of paradise or is Jack Harlow always this grumpy?” The announcer asked making everyone in the room laugh.
“Come here Jack.” Grabbing Jack by his chin you smashed your lips onto his, him being petty didn’t kiss back at first but eventually he did and grabbed the side of your face deepening the kiss before pulling away.
“Well damn I thought a porno or something was for-sure going to happen.”
“Shut up Urban!” Jack and You said together.
“I’m sorry Jack, I shouldn’t have flirted with Jordan, can you forgive me?”
“I forgive you baby girl besides I know many ways you can make it up to me tonight.” He grinned and sure enough that night you made sure to make it up to him in many ways with many rounds.
749 notes - Posted October 29, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
Master List
962 notes - Posted May 31, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
#tumblr2022#year in review#my 2022 tumblr year in review#your tumblr year in review#I fuck with it 💀😭 but shit not be rebloging from my page the post
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tagged by @radellama for 15 questions so here we go
1 - are you named after anyone?
no but apparently a portion of my extended family didn’t think much of it at the time and it had to grow on them
2 - when was the last time you cried?
i’d been in a weird headspace for like a week where i knew i needed to cry but couldn’t, and then i watched gotg3 and it was super emotional but i didn’t even cry during that. the a few hours later two of my housemates said something that hurt my feelings and that was the last straw so i went to my room and finally broke and then just kept crying because i kept thinking about how emotional the movie was. i’ve cried once or twice since then but can’t remember why
3 - do you have kids?
lmao
4 - do you use sarcasm a lot?
yeah but not in the way sassy teen movie characters use it. like rads said, it’s more towards extreme hyperbole. it’s a different flavour.
5 - what sports do/have you played?
swimming, tennis and soccer when i was a kid, and volleyball when i was 11-18. i miss volleyball. never basketball because i fucking hate basketball. loved space jam though.
6 - what’s the first thing you notice about people?
how they look. sometimes i see someone and go “damn his shirt is great”, other times i’ll go “woah she’s cute as hell i wish i was her”. when you work in customer service you tend to do a bit of people watching from the counter so yeah visual aesthetic
7 - eye colour?
blue
8 - scary movies or happy endings?
i haven’t seen a lot of scary movies, but they’re usually fun. the thing is there’s so many different types of movies i’ve seen that just happen to have happy endings that it’s weird to compare that to a genre. it’s kinda like asking someone to choose between jazz music or songs with a fade out ending. like… there’s no real reason to pit these against each other and it’s not balanced
9 - any special talents?
i don’t think i’m good enough at anything to call it a talent but if you asked some of my friends or family they could probably pick something out.
10 - where were you born?
australia
11 - what are your hobbies?
gaming’s been the top one since i moved out, but i do still indulge in creative stuff every now and then. drawing, music etc. but i need to get back into writing, and also video editing. that’s fun and i don’t do enough of it. also reading but the house i live in is a shit reading environment so i haven’t done that in ages.
12 - do you have any pets?
not right now. my childhood dog died in 2021 and we’ve had 2 dogs in the house i currently live in but neither of them are in the house anymore.
13 - how tall are you?
195cm
14 - favourite subject in school?
outdoor ed. i love camping and rock climbing and kayaking and all that (i just don’t do it very often) so in high school i loved the camps my outdoor ed class would take. skiing on snowy mountains, white water rafting, hiking in rocky mountains and cliffs, it was so fucking fun. made a lot of really awesome memories with a lot of guys i wouldn’t normally have spent time with otherwise. i miss those times.
15 - dream job?
it used to be author. i do still want to write and publish at least ONE book, but i want to do more than that. i want to make movies with my friends, but my thoughts on what part i’ll play in it is a lot more vague than it used to be. acting, directing, i don’t really know. as long as it’s with my friends i guess i’ll roll with it. i don’t know what i really want, but i don’t want a career path that pigeonholes me into just one creative outlet forever.
i have 2 mutuals on this app and rads is one and he tagged the other in his post so this thread ends here lmao
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#ACLA24#ACLA24HighSchoolStudents#youtube#youtube video#climate leaders#climate solutions#climate action#climate and environment#climate#climate change#climate and health#climate blog#climate justice#climate news#weather and climate#environmental news#environment#environmental awareness#environment and health#environmental#environmental issues#environmental education#environmental justice#environmental protection#environmental health#high school students#high school#youth#youth of america#school
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I posted 429 times in 2022
That's 428 more posts than 2021!
14 posts created (3%)
415 posts reblogged (97%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@dyonisia96
@nightscavalry
@johannesviii
@alyona11
@lelelego
I tagged 391 of my posts in 2022
Only 9% of my posts had no tags
#yes - 5 posts
#babies - 4 posts
#wow - 4 posts
#also op your board game q made me sad bc i've literally never played any of those and only heard of like two this girl had no childhood - 3 posts
#doctor who - 3 posts
#owo it's all of dem space-time blorbos!!!! - 2 posts
#the stars don't come out because they never left - 2 posts
#omg - 2 posts
#except i didn't play fnaf but have binged playthroughs from like five different people aaaa - 2 posts
#why am i in love with leela's outfit - 2 posts
Longest Tag: 139 characters
#if anything they barely interact with the tardis in what i've been reading and i've read like twenty-five books all about different doctors
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
Seeing Sandman posts on my feed is so confusing because for such a long time the only Dream I saw shit about was that Minecraft guy and every time I see Dream my first though is The fuck that smp guy did this time and my brain takes a fucking minute to process that it's a wrong fandom
3 notes - Posted September 23, 2022
#4
WAIT DID THEY REALLY JUST
Did they just take THE SAME Bee and Puppycat and make it LONGER for Netflix??????
Does that mean I didn't have to rewatch it twice in a row to comprehend at least a lil bit what tf was going on???? I had to just wait for a normal show?????
Not like I mind, the cartoon is gorgeous either way (I'm on ep one btw and I think at least the first of Bee's weird dreams looked cooler in the og show) BUT MAN
I never thought I'd actually see the day
6 notes - Posted September 11, 2022
#3
Petition for Dana Terrace to leave our boi Hunter the fuck alone. Our blorbo has suffered enough.
7 notes - Posted October 16, 2022
#2
Hey hermits of tumblr here's a fun challenge for you:
Describe your character quirks i.e. list out habits and traits you have that would make you stand out if you were a character in a work of fiction. This is an exercise in finding something unique about each of us. And also a possible help for writers looking for something to add to their characters ;)
Here's my ✨ character quirks ✨
Hates wearing makeup but likes the process of someone applying makeup on her or doing her hair
Actually uses a set of like a hundred aquarelle pencils instead of eye liner/lipstick/masquerade makeup when she feels extra fancy (usually ends up making rainbow eye liner)
Sometimes acts like a cat around friends she's comfortable with (rubs head, lies with head on knees, purrs when receives pats)
Has a comedic amount of cats (four) and wants more
Has zero coherence in clothing style a bunch of fandom clothes being the only constant thing
Wears exclusively converse spring through autumn (as long as the weather is good enough)
Carries a book around most of the time; in fact spent her prom reading and tuning out the music (which she is extremely proud of and will tell everyone at the first opportune moment)
Swears a whole fucking lot
Quotes memes/films/TV shows a lot or at least really wants to with the only thing stopping her the fact that she knows a quote she has in mind is too niche to be understood
Absolutely cannot sleep with the lights on or during the day; will wake up at dawn if the curtains aren't drawn
Grandma friend: will try to feed you everything there is in the house if you come visit
Some people spend tons of money on clothes; others can't walk past a make-up shop; this bitch has no self-control when entering a bookstore (in fact she would refuse to spend too much on food but then she goes near a bookstore and wakes up an hour later with two bags of books)
Compliments friends in fairly smooth pick-up lines at any given opportunity
8 notes - Posted September 27, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
19 notes - Posted November 24, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
#tumblr2022#year in review#my 2022 tumblr year in review#your tumblr year in review#love how I actually suddenly became super active here#like literally out of nowhere lmao
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Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E131 (March 30, 2021)
Tonight’s guests are Liam O’Brien and Sam Riegel!
Brian points out that a lot of Caleb’s greatest fears have come to pass. Liam: “It’s funny, because he’d kind of believed for a while that those things weren’t going to happen. After a while, he got complacent.” He notes that it was extra wild because everything with Trent popped up again in the midst of that complacency. And how did it feel to be defiant toward Trent? “I think Trent successfully made Caleb question if Caleb really was in control“ at the dinner party. “I feel like anything that I do is part of his plans for me, or is that just gaslighting? I’m legitimately scared of that dude.” Sam: “Of Matt?” Liam: “Sure.” He highlights the disconnect between knowing that the M9 is mechanically powerful and could possibly defeat Trent in a dice-and-stats battle, versus fearing him in a story sense and being convinced he can do almost anything.
Sam, on Luc’s death: “That was brutal, man. Matt Mercer is a-- he hates children! Clearly. He actively sought to kill a child in the campaign in as brutal a way as possible. He hates children and wants them dead. Canon. No, but to RP, that was horrible.” He highlights that so much of Veth’s arc has been about trying to get back to her family. “We had to choose something and we thought we were making the right choice. It was all Veth’s fault, and it was pretty rotten. My heart was beating pretty fast, and I certainly didn’t want to have my son die live on the stream. I don’t know what Veth would have done. That’s the end, that’s over. It’s almost worse than when your own character would die. This is something that would also kill Veth.” After the episode was over: “just shaken. I also didn’t know what to do next! That felt like a turning-point moment for my character, weirdly so close to what we assume to be the end arc of this campaign. I texted Matt later that night and was like, that’s it, Veth’s out, I’m tapping out.”
There’s an interlude in which Sam discovers a new dream to record an episode of this show from his Peloton. Dani informs him that she will not be inviting him back.
On Astrid, Liam: “I literally don’t know what she’s doing. I know that she’s dangerous, she always was ambitious, and there’s not been a moment where Caleb let his guard down with her. He’s not trying to reestablish what they had. He cares for the both of them, for Astrid and Eodwulf. He thinks about it a lot, still. He can’t tell how much she buys into everything that she experienced and is now living as a full-grown adult. He suspects that she’s bought in and is not going to change things, because she believes in the system, as much as he’d like to peel her away. He does believe that they want what’s best for the Empire, and stopping whatever wants to come vomiting out of a hole in the frozen north is good for everyone. And they’re powerful. They’re not trustworthy, obviously. But there’s enough at stake to make it worth it. He could imagine a situation where they fight each other to the death.” He was convinced Astrid was going to stop them when they left the tower and was really shocked when she held back. Sam: “Not me! I’ve trusted Astrid since day one. She’s the greatest! I sent a letter to her, she’s very nice, I think you guys would be a nice couple. I believe every word she says.”
On having to decide on Veth deciding to go off and save the world after Luc’s death. “Like I said, I was ready to be done. And then I decided somewhere in there that that’s not very D&D. So I thought I’d leave it up to somebody else, so I asked Caduceus to decide for me, essentially. She knows she’s putting her other family in danger if she doesn’t go. It’s an impossible choice, you know?” Liam: “I love watching you grapple with it, because you’re a lovely father and love your kids.”
On the Sanatorium, Sam: “That was brutal, man. Matt lulls you into a sense of complacency. We’d forgotten that Caleb was a stone-cold killer! It had been a while since he went on a murder spree. Still got it!” Liam: “I never meant for this character to be perfect sunshine.” Brian: “You don’t say.” Liam: “He’s very not-perfect, and I think in his brain, he was going in with the impression that they needed to get in and get out as soon as possible. The place is crawling with people with magic ability, and I didn’t have faith that we wouldn’t be sussed out or something wasn’t going to blow an illusion.” Everything was about getting out of there as fast as possible.
Did the conversation with Yeza help with Veth’s decision? “First of all, every conversation with Yeza is a beautiful one. Every time she talks to Yeza, it makes her feel good. In some ways, she’s gotten to the point now where she knows Yeza’s going to be supportive, she knows he’s going to allow her to do what she wants, but maybe that’s too much. Maybe she needs to not listen to him, basically, and be like, no, you need to be selfish now, dude, you need to say ‘come home, I’m sick of you leaving’. At a certain point, being supportive can turn into being enabling.”
Cosplay of the Week: Jester in the snow! (liljerbear47, photography by kairiceleste on Instagram)
On Trent’s motivations for chasing Caleb: “I really don’t know. The simplest explanation is to just hammer down the nail that’s sticking up. It has crossed his mind that all high-level wizards are in danger of their own ambition and egos, so it’s occurred to him that Trent might have the same kind of ideas that Halas had in the past, and maybe Caleb was always meant to be another body to jump into. Maybe in some sick, disgusting, twisted way, he wants him to be his successor. I am thinking of the next campaign, without getting too deep in, trying to do something that is much more ride-along. Caleb is very, very specific, and I thought long and hard about all the different pieces on the chessboard for him. For campaign three, I’m looking forward to seeing what happens.”
Dani: “Do I need to be keeping lore on your fucking ads?”
On the cursed dagger: “It was a tricky one, because in campaign one, one of the characters was under the influence of a cursed weapon, but it interacted with him and he knew what it was and what it did. And it affected his gameplay as a character. For me, Veth didn’t know what it was, ever. I as a player knew what it was doing, but Veth didn’t know at all. So it was kind of like my dirty, dark secret for many months. I knew this thing was coming perilously close to killing me, but my character didn’t know enough to bring it up to her friends. Nobody ever asked! So I was like, well, I guess this thing’s just going to kill me one day, and it’s kind of going to be a surprise.” Liam: “Sam, you love danger and self-destruction so much, you might as well be Mollymauk.”
On the fight in Yasha’s sequence, Sam: “You gotta put a character in your storm giant creature. It was so fun! It was so great of Matt to involve us in this encounter. It would’ve been fun just to watch, because Matt would have made it amazing and Ashley was sweating bullets, which is always fun to watch.” Sam notes he felt guilty, but Liam was going for the kill. Liam: “Matt’s gotta be careful about giving me that kind of story beat. I do not fucking care, I just fucking flip, I’m like, well, I’m going to destroy you, and I have no qualms about it. It’s too much fun!”
The Beau/Yasha tower date was in part inspired by not being able to give gifts as easily this last year. “This thing that we do together is a gift, but I love finding these moments, like the book for Jester and the tower for Yasha and for Beau. I really just wanted to give both of them a little magic for a night. I wanted them to leave this-- we’re trying to be as entertaining as possible, but shit is having an effect on all of us too, and I wanted them to have an escape, a great place to escape to.”
Fan Art of the Week: an amazing group shot, plus Marion, Yeza, and Luc! (vocaz on Twitter)
On choosing Essek over Trent, Liam: “It would have been so interesting and awful and great! Essek and Astrid and Eodwulf are everything that Bren used to be attracted to that are terrible for him. Essek, hopefully he can with time find a way out of the hole that he dug himself into, but it was only two months ago where he was found out and his ambitions came crashing down around him. Long-term, I have high hopes for him, but I think it’s going to be hard.” In contrast, Astrid and Eodwulf are still “deep in the shit. It would have been really hard to navigate, but fun to play at the table. We made the right choice with what we went with. Essek’s just getting started, and Caleb doesn’t trust him entirely, because he was burned so hard not too long ago. He’s still more trustworthy than the other three. So it’s the better choice. While Caleb has all these ties on the other side, they’re really fucking dangerous. So if you have to choose, you choose Essek. But fuck that die.” Sam: “Veth, much like Sam Riegel, makes instant decisions about whether to trust someone or not and sticks to it forever. Astrid, 100% trust. Eodwulf, 100% distrust. Essek, completely distrust. I still don’t think he’s a good guy. Ikithon? Trust. 100%. Because you know where he’s coming forward, you know what he wants. I still want him dead, but I trust him.”
On Veth’s post-adventuring plans: “Veth is probably still too in it right now to think about what comes next. I, Sam Riegel, have a good idea of what I want Veth to do post-campaign.” Brian: “Maybe you shouldn’t tell us. Save it for the show!” Sam: “All she knows is she can’t do this anymore. It’s very unhealthy to be battle-wounded every other day. It’s fun for a while, but college has to end at some point, and she’s gotta go home.”
On Frumpkin changing appearance and returning to the Feywild: “I don’t know what I’m going to do, but the way it feels now for Caleb is that he feels too enmeshed in everything that has happened, and too much good has happened, and too much needs to happened, that that really narcissistic, selfish goal has the risk of harming everything else, which is more important. And that’s how he looks at it now. So he’s gearing towards letting everything from the beginning of the campaign, and where he started, go, and trying to figure out what use he’s going to be now and what he’s going to do if they’re not all dead. If Matt throws that shit down, I don’t know what I will do, I think about it a lot. But turning Frumpkin white and saying you’re free either way is him preparing to let go of everything he’s been holding on to for a really long time. He’s addicted to that idea that he can fix himself, and we’ll see if that hard choice gets presented, what he might do. But where he stands now, he doesn’t think that’s going to be reality, and he sees a way that he can be of use that he never really anticipated before, so he’s slowly shifting gears towards living with the pain he was trying to remove.”
On the last request scene and confidence heading into Aeor, Sam: “I feel like that’s a good request. I think all of us realized that if we die, that probably bodes badly for the world. I feel like all of us are at a point now as characters and as friends, that the first order of business would be to take care of everybody else’s shit, although we probably have different ideas of how to do that.” Liam: “I want the Empire to be healed, Caleb has all these memories of his parents and what they wanted for the world, and he wants that too. It’s clearly not in place now, the system needs to be broken and replaced. That could be a part of Caleb’s sunset. I don’t want Caleb to die, so maybe he can work on that after. As everything starts to shake out and we start heading towards our destiny, Caleb’s just free-floating. He’s not even going after the same thing he started for. So he’s looking at Veth’s family, and Luc specifically, and seeing that’s me, that’s a little boy in the Empire.”
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This week's (16-08-2021 - 22-08-2021) reading log is here. This week's reading log is super duper long and filled with lots of good things (my apologies for the long post, I really could not find a good spot to do a read more). I discovered some new favourites and re-read some old favourites and while I had an intense week personally at least the fics I read were absolutely phenomenal. I do recommend checking out the warnings as some fics are a bit heavier/angstier and you might wanna be prepared. Most of these fics are Stucky but there are a couple of other ships in between.
If you are looking for more fun and/or good things make sure to check out the @marveldisabilitycelebration as well to see all the awesome art, fics, meta, etcetera people created! And while I am mentioning events I am a mod for let me also just quickly mention that sign-ups for the @stuckygiftexchange are still open until the end of the month <3
Favourites are marked with a 🌻 Fics that are only available to AO3 users are marked with a 🔒 and Tumblr fics are marked with a 🍀
🌻 The Bends by dreamsinthewitchouse @dreamsinthewitchouse [Danbeau, side Stucky, 2k words, Teen]
Memory is not a house you can just walk back into after finding the key you thought you’d lost. It’s a thing you wade into and out of, rewriting it as it rewrites you.
It’s not without its rewards, either - recovering a memory about Maria and Monica, about her life, feels better than socking a thousand bad guys in the face, better than all the photon blasts in the world.
Then again, realising there’s still memories she can’t access, even after all this time, feels like drowning in space.
Not the one out there - the one inside her.
🌻 Sweet & Salty by musette22 @musette22 [Stucky, 3k words, Teen]
Idiots in love. That's it. That's the fic.
When life gives you lemons by moonythejedi394 @moonythejedi394 [Stucky, 34k words, Explicit] (11/15 chapters)
Or 13 Terrible Things to Do With Lemons Other Than Making Lemonade
Steve Rogers is a home health nurse. He works for an agency, which assigned him to the aging Winifred Barnes, the one and only Silent Era Hollywood darling. As her needs increased, she requested the agency assign Steve to her full-time. She could pay for it, so she got it. Steve then moved in with her, becoming her caregiver; he cooked, he cleaned, he managed her medications, he made sure she was comfortable.
Winifred's children treated him less than ideally. He was the help, after all. And then Steve had the audacity to go and turn out to be eldest son James Barnes's soulmate. No one saw that coming.
🍀 SamRhodey Tumblr Fic by ipoiledi [SamRhodey, ? words, Teen?]
“Wilson, this is Rhodey; Rhodey, Wilson,” Tony Stark says, and suddenly some six foot tall sexy guy is shoved right in front of Sam, and they both stumble a little, bumping into each other. This is a crowded party. “You guys have things in common, right?” Stark asks. “Uh, Army stuff. Talk about that. I hate wallflowers; stop wallflowering and talk to each other.”
Shorteralls by moonythejedi394 [Stucky, 6k words, Explicit]
The first time Bucky ever saw Steve Rogers, he was struck by how Neanderthal-like his response was. It was immediately followed by a bout of mental scolding. The second time was just about the same. The third time, it was actually appropriate for Bucky to start a conversation with him, at which point he was determined to be the gentleman.
No such luck. Steve Rogers is, always has been and always will be, a relentless flirt. These days, Bucky's Neanderthal-ist feelings about Steve are consensual and highly appreciated. More so now that they're having a baby.
what the fuck are perfect places anyway by tigerlilycorinne [Stucky, 6k words, Teen]
Steve clears his throat and stands. “Well, I should head in. I might want to begin packing.”
Bucky stills. “You won’t,” he says, trying to sound commanding. It only comes out uncertain. “Don’t.”
Steve shakes his head. “Maybe not tonight,” he says, and Bucky knows they’ll be discussing this again soon.
“Then stay. Play… play cards with me or something.”
Steve’s eyebrows jump up, his mouth tugging up in another of his bemused smiles that do things to Bucky’s insides, but he drops his hand from the doorway and steps back into Bucky’s room. Somehow, Bucky feels as if he’s won—not the war, just the battle.
Steve won’t stay forever. But he’ll stay for cards.
Steve and Bucky, on the run after Civil War (with a few alterations to canon), are laying low in Wakanda. But they can’t stay there forever.
🌻 honestly thought i’d be dead by now, but what you can trust is that i need your touch by moonythejedi394 [Stucky, 105k words, Explicit]
Bucky is 37 years old; he’s unmarried, hasn’t had a Sub of his own, is definitely not ripped, comfortable at his job as an Advanced Practice RN at Brooklyn General ER, and just got his Five Years coin from AA.
Steve is 26 years old; he’s unmarried, his last and only Dom has Alzheimer's, he's worryingly muscular, uncomfortable in his job as the government’s poster Alpha for masculinity and strength, and worries more than he should about his BMI.
Unfortunately, Steve and Bucky meet initially in a not-cute moment. Bucky’s tired as shit thanks to the sudden alien invasion that shook New York and Steve is tired as shit because he hasn’t slept more than 20 minutes at a time in – well, since 1936, probably. Bucky’s Alpha instincts get irritated at the sudden presence of another "Alpha" into his territory and Steve’s suppressed submissive tendencies latch onto this grumpy bachelor Alpha and he only suppresses it further.
Bucky’s grumpiness and Steve’s duckling impressionism aside, both of them are a mess. But since both of them are a mess? Their messes seem to fit pretty well together.
Deep Sea Diving by Aida Ronan [Stucky, 5k words, Explicit]
Steve's wallowing in heat-related misery under a shade tree in Central Park when a man walks by in bright red booty shorts and a crop top. RIP Steve Rogers. It was nice knowing you.
honey, make this easy by steebadore [Stucky, 8k words, Explicit]
Bucky likes the way he looks. His silk button up with the tiny gold polka dots feels soft on his skin and is tailored perfectly; no pulling at his chest or belly. His hair falls in shiny dark waves and his skin is smooth and dewy. He looks expensive. He looks taken care of. He looks like Steve’s.
🌻 let's take it back to the start by howdoyousleep @howdoyousleep3 [Stucky, 6k words, Teen]
How it all began.
This sleepwalking through my life. by barthelme [Stucky, 1k words, Explicit]
The internet is an interesting place and when Bucky came home (or, when he came to live with Steve), Steve did a lot of research. Apparently, it’s not safe to wake a sleepwalker. He assumes that waking a sleepwalker with traumatic dreams and PTSD is beyond just being frowned upon.
And he tells himself--has told himself--that this is safer for Bucky. That if he were to stop him and wake him up, that Bucky would be mortified to be slurping on his best friend’s cock. That all of the improvements he’s made would be lost, would be repressed, would be just--
They’d be back at square one.
So he lets Bucky do it.
🌻 the way i've been craving by howdoyousleep [Stucky, 3k words, Explicit]
"Lunch break at 12:30. My office. Hope you’re hungry…"
It’s the ellipsis that sends Bucky’s insides swimming warmly, his heart beating twice as fast against his ribs where he sits in class. Senator Rogers is concise, direct, to the point. Without an ellipsis this is lunch, this is a meeting. With it though?
This is a booty call.
nasty but classy by howdoyousleep [Stucky, 4k words, Explicit]
“No, you don’t have to know the purpose, that doesn’t matter. Nat showed me this challenge where couples drink a lot of wine and get drunk together but they can’t touch each other. And whoever touches the other first has to...has to give the other head.”
🌻 Put It on Repeat, It Stays the Same by giselleslash [Stucky, 20k words, Explicit]
Steve and Bucky have a one night stand that turns into a friends with benefits situation. A weekend snowed in at Bucky’s apartment brings to light how much that really doesn’t suit either one of them.
Greetings to the New Brunette by victoria_p (musesfool) [Stucky, 10k words, General]
"You said he should have a hobby. That it would help."
"I meant, like, knitting or coin collecting. Motocross, if he was feeling antsy. A baby's not a hobby. It's lifetime commitment."
🌻 Rogers & Barnes: Partners by triedunture [Stucky, 10k words, Teen]
Steve and Bucky have to pose as a couple for a mission. Nat insists it really is the only option. She's checked.
The complication: unbeknownst to even Natasha, Steve and Bucky's friendship has been rocky ever since Bucky confessed his tender feelings and Steve left him out in the cold. Can asexual, completely-in-love-with-his-angry-best-friend Steve complete the mission and win Bucky's heart?
(The answer is yes. Yay!)
this will be our year (took a long time to come) by biblionerd07 [Stucky, 4k words, General]
Bucky's therapist is worried he's using Steve as a crutch and wants him to try going on outings without Steve. It wouldn't be terrible, honestly, if Bucky could just manage to open his mouth and say something to Steve.
I'll hold my breath by Little_Lottie (tfwatson) [Stucky, 8k words, Mature]
Sometimes Bucky’s hands flex in Steve's direction. Neither of them knows exactly why, but at least one of them has a hunch.
Bucky touches everything but Steve, even though Steve is all he really wants to touch.
Start from the Beginning by Mumble_Bee [Stucky, 13k words, Explicit]
What about a sex pollen fic where the pollen-ed one doesn’t remember getting hit in the face with a sex flower, and wakes up midway through the depollenating?
Or: the one where Steve wakes up on his back with a stranger buried balls-deep in his ass.
Match by emphasisonem [Stucky, 4k words, Mature]
The situation’s actually kind of funny from the right perspective, Bucky thinks as he reads the message for what feels like the hundredth time. He’s finally matched with a hot, funny guy. Tall and broad and clean cut. An absolutely breathtaking smile. Bucky’s walking wet dream. And he’s good. They haven’t messaged on the app, but Bucky already knows him.
He knows him because Steve Rogers is an art history professor at his university. His art history professor.
Best friends and married since childhood by StuckySituation [Stucky, 1k words, General]
Inspired by @/peterssquill's post in tumblr: "bucky and steve got married on the playground when they were like eight and though neither of them would ever admit it to anyone, even each other, they still consider it official"
~♥~ ♥~ ♥~
“Natasha, stop trying to set me up with every woman you meet, I’m-”
“Too shy? Too scared?”
“No, I’m-”
“Too busy? You’re mostly retired these days, not a good excuse anymore.” Natasha smirks and then drawls: “Or just too gay?”
Steve flushes at that, even if isn’t true -- he’s bisexual, not gay. “Let it go, Nat, I’m not looking for anything. I’m already married, for fuck’s sake.”
Clearly not what she expected. “What.”
Steve grimaces. He didn’t mean to tell anyone that, ever.
“Sorry, can’t talk about it right now!” he says and jumps out of the plane.
Nobody Should Be Alone on a Holiday by emphasisonem [Stucky, 2k words, Teen]
“So, um-” Bucky begins speaking again, pulling Steve from his less-than-work-appropriate thoughts. The brunet has shoved his hands into the pockets of his dark slacks, and he’s shifting from one foot to the other as he smiles shyly. “I have a question for you.”
“Shoot,” Steve grins, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms over his broad chest. Bucky swallows deeply as one of his hands comes up to pull at the collar of his button-up, and Steve can’t help following the motion of his Adam’s apple.
“I was, uh-” Bucky continues- “That is, I heard you don’t have Thanksgiving plans?”
In which Bucky finds out that Steve's going to be alone on Thanksgiving and invites his coworker to spend the holiday with him.
🌻 It's Been A Long Season Through by thiccbuckybarnes @thiccbuckybarnesfic [Stucky, 49k words, Explicit]
Bucky Barnes is in desperate need of a change in scenery, which is why he makes the foolhardy decision to quit his job, leave his asshole of a fiance, pack up his life, and move to his grandfather’s old farm all within a single day.
He expects confusion, hardship, and maybe even failure. But love? He wasn’t expecting that.
--
Or, a Stucky Stardew Valley AU that nobody but me wanted and that’s ok.
oh, peach pit, where'd the hours go? by thiccbuckybarnes [Stucky, 10k words, Explicit]
Can't see the forest for the trees.
--
Or, Steve learns that just because he and Bucky got their happily ever after, it doesn’t mean the past won’t come back to bite them.
I'll find my way by rainbow_nerds [Stucky, 725 words, Teen]
Steve had watched Bucky fall, and nothing had been the same since.
AU-gust day 19: Daemons
special delivery by glim @glim [Stucky, 6k words, Teen]
It's not that Steve's bad at taking care of himself when he gets sick; he just wishes he didn't have to all the time.
At least he can order most of what he needs online. That's some small comfort, that he can have soup and ice cream and everything else brought to his door.
at first chance i'd take the bed warmed by the body by spacebuck @spacebuck [Stucky, 8k words, Explicit]
This close, Steve can see exactly how beautiful his hands are. He’s never really noticed before, or at least he’s never really had a reason to notice, but the man’s hands are large, tanned like he works outside all day. There’s an endearing callus on the heel of one of his palms, and Steve can’t quite work out when calluses became endearing.
Steve pauses the video. Swallows hard. Casts his eyes around for anything that’ll keep his mind off the hands on his screen, off the words inked into those hands, the delicate shape of a bird’s wing, the curling edge of a vine.
He looks down. The name of the channel is right there, blaring the man’s name right into Steve’s brain until it feels like he’s known it all along.
Bucky Barnes.
OR: the one where Bucky's a youtuber who solves puzzles on camera, and steve's smitten and horny
🌻 Rock On! by millesable @marvelousescapism [Clintasha, 700 words, General]
“Hey, Romanoff!”
He lifted his hand, index finger and pinky finger raised, thumb out, all other fingers tucked. Their secret sign; their confession for the world to see, safe in the knowledge that the world wasn’t listening.
“Rock on!”
🌻 You Like the Way I Look by dontcallmebree @iamthe-wo-manwhocan [Stucky, 2k words, Explicit]
Bucky sidles up to him, hand boldly coming to rest on his chest. “What about you, big guy? Care for a dance?” Steve watches Bucky’s eyes twinkle with satisfaction, somehow already knowing he’s got Steve on the hook.
A decade out of the ice, Steve Rogers returns to New York. Reeling from a battle against the Chitauri, a night with the troublesome Bucky Barnes might be just what he needs.
Join the Rebellion by rainbow_nerds [Stucky, 765 words, Teen]
Bucky knew he shouldn't be out after curfew, but he couldn't resist the urge. He didn’t know where he was going, but he knew it was where he wanted to be.
AU-gust day 20: Dystopia
🔒 Five Days in December by mywingsareonwheels @mywingsareonwheels [Evanstan, 4k words, Teen]
“Shit shit shit shit...” muttered Chris to himself, glad that the sound of piped Christmas carols was drowning out his swearing amid the picture books. Most of the store was heaving even though it was Sunday, he’d been recognised at least three times, finding presents for all of his nieces and nephews was proving far more of a headache than expected, and he’d just sent a pile of copies of "Strictly No Elephants" tumbling off the bookshelf.
He scrambled about trying to pick them all up, and then dropped them again as someone bumped right into his backside. He lost his balance, caught himself against a bookcase, and a landslide of "Carter Is a Painter’s Cat" joined "Strictly No Elephants" on the floor. He yelped.
“Ah fuck, I’m so sorry… Chris!”
* * * * * * * * * *
London, December 2021. Amid cats, books, and the cold English drizzle, Chris finds everything he was hoping for and thought he would never have.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Reaching for Fire by dixons_mama @dixons-mama [Stucky, 7k words, Explicit]
Bucky has always felt a fire in his heart (and other body parts) when it came to his boss, Steve Rogers, but he's made sure to never feed those flames. When he finds out about Steve's second job, though, he's tempted to let that fire out.
i've been dreaming of a face like yours by thiccbuckybarnes [Stucky, 3k words, Explicit]
Bucky is about to busy himself with making a small dinner for himself when he stops in his tracks at the figure drinking a cup of coffee in the kitchen, leaning against the counter and smirking at him.
It’s Steve.
“Surprise, sweet boy,” he says before setting his cup down.
--
Or, PWP reunion sex
🌻 Somewhere, Under Your Skin by thiccbuckybarnes [Stucky, 16k words, Explicit]
Bucky Barnes treats himself to a one-night stand after having a very bad no good day.
The sex is good--great, even. Might be the best sex of his life.
But Bucky wouldn’t have slept with the guy if he had known that he was going to continuously run into him every day for the next fucking month.
--
Or, a Big Grump Bucky has a hot one night stand with a college kid who is popping up everywhere in his everyday life and he doesn’t know how to deal with it.
(Written for HYBB Bingo Square: Grumpy Bucky)
i've played heartstrings before but not in your key by thiccbuckybarnes [Stucky, 11k words, Explicit]
He glances down, seeing a folded couple of papers, before peering up at Bucky. The older man is biting his bottom lip, making it pretty and red. Steve wants to run his tongue across where his teeth are digging into his flesh.
"What's this?" Steve asks, setting his phone down, emails forgotten. Bucky shrugs and looks away.
"I dunno. You tell me, genius," he says, sounding bratty enough that it makes Steve's dick twitch in his pants. Jesus, there has to be something wrong with him.
Steve glances once more at Bucky, who now has his arms crossed against his chest and is pointedly not looking at Steve, before picking up the stack of folded papers. He opens them, seeing a collection of maybe five or six sheets of paper. His eyes immediately land on the list of familiar words with negative next to each one.
--
Or, Steve Rogers is a jealous, possessive little shit that wants nothing more than to mark up his boyfriend and stake his claim. And Bucky knows it. (And he likes it.)
🌻 I'm Home (With You) by BonkyBornes @padfoot-and-the-marauders [Stucky, 2k words, General]
In any other circumstance, the apartment would've been perfect. But it was today, and the fact that he was here meant he wasn’t out searching. He knew they hadn’t had any leads for weeks and he knew Natasha was right; all three of them were exhausted and a break would do them good. It just felt wrong to Steve that he was comfortable while Bucky was still out there—somewhere. Probably cold. Probably hungry.
The knock came again. Sighing, Steve unwrapped his hand from the dog tags and remembered how to move. Cold wind and snow greeted him when he opened the door. The solitary figure was walking down the steps, collar popped against the chill.
“Did you need something?” he called.
The person stopped. They were still. And then they turned. *
Or, the Christmas Steve deserved after Winter Soldier.
The portrait by rainbow_nerds [Stucky, 915 words, General]
Steve Rogers has a Gift. He can help people find their soulmates, all he needs is some art supplies, a quiet place, and eye contact.
AU-gust day 21: soulmates
Maybe A Muse by buckybarnesdeservestobehappy [Stucky, 2k words, Mature]
When Bucky Barnes needs extra money, he’s appalled that his best friends think he should become a model for the art department on campus. Shy, nerdy, and socially awkward, he’s not sure that’s something he feels comfortable doing. Still, he needs money, and he likes the idea of becoming someone’s muse. The problem is he had no idea two things would happen. First, one of the students in the class is exactly his type; second, he has to model nude.
#my reading log#r's reading log#fic rec#stucky fic rec#fics recs#stucky#danbeau#samrhodey#longpost#long post#clintasha#evanstan
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Longing
Title: Longing
Bad Bitches Bingo Square Filled: Fake Dating & “I tried, I tried so hard. Why couldn’t you?”
Written for: @badbitchesbingo
Summary: He never was yours in the first place.
Pairing: former Dean Winchester x fem!Reader, Jo Harvelle x fem!Reader (implied/fake dating)
Characters: Lisa Braeden, Sam Winchester
Rating: Mature
Word Count: 2k
Warnings: angst, unrequited love, language, longing, sadness, bisexual reader, a kiss or two among girls, Jo being a good friend and more, look Lisa is great too in this story
Divider by @firefly-graphics
2021 Bad Bitches Bingo masterlist
Longing. One simple word describes the feeling burning in your chest.
Once upon a time, it was only you and him. Whenever he needed a shoulder to lean on or a body to use, he found shelter in your world. A world he decided to avoid like a plague for months.
You didn’t have it in you to tell his new girl months ago he promised you the same things he whispers lovingly in her ear now. It pains you to watch them do all the things he denied giving to you.
Not that you ever would be the girl he could bring home. While the girl he has on his arm tonight wears shoes costing more than your car, you struggle to pay for your study and rent at the same time.
“Born with a silver spoon in her mouth,” Lisa mutters, wiping one of the tables. “He’s a fool, Y/N. Everyone believed he would ask you to become his girlfriend one day.”
“I’m not the kind of girl he could bring home, Lis,” you avoid looking at Dean and his new girlfriend. You can’t blame the girl for falling for his charm and his cocky smile. Who could deny him when he looks at you with those emerald eyes, making you weak in the knees?
“You are worth ten Dean Winchesters,” Jo walks over to hand you a drink, smiling shyly at you. “Your shift is over, babe. Don’t do this to yourself. He’s not worth it.”
You give your friends a cracked smile before you walk toward the next empty table to wipe it clean.
“Y/N, go home and sleep it off. You have an important test in not two days,” Lisa tuts. “You can make it out of this shithole of a bar. We are counting on you.”
“You know, being smart and working hard doesn’t make you worth a Winchester,” the sadness in your eyes forces a tiny sob to leave Jo’s lips.
“Come here,” she throws herself at you, hugs you tightly, hands lingering a bit too long on the small of your back for a friendly hug. “You will find the best guy one day. I swear, in a few weeks you will not remember Dean Winchester and his new girlfriend.”
“Oh, believe me, I will remember him. His new girl seems to love to post everything they do on social media. For a guy hiding from the press and hating social media, he loves to pose with that girl.”
“Forget that bastard,” Lisa jerks her head toward Sam, Dean’s younger brother. Said guy leans lazily against a wall, eyes searching for his latest adventure. “Why not fucking his brother to get even with Dean?”
“I won’t stoop so low, Lis,” you glance at Sam. It’s not as if he’s not an attractive man or that you do not have a size kink, though. You just don’t want to be another notch in Sam’s belt. It’s worse enough you ended up being the latest conquest of his elder brother. “Sam is nice, but I’m not in the mood for a one-night stand with a guy.”
“How about you ask him to fake it? I bet he’s nice enough to show Dean what he’s missing out,” Jo nods eagerly. “Right, Jo? Fake dating is the new revenge fuck.”
“I will not ask Sam to do so,” you cry. “He’s a Winchester, his brother’s most loyal fan. Sam would never lie to his big brother. Not for me or any other girl. It’s out of the question I will ask a Winchester for shit.”
“He’s looking at you, Y/N,” Lisa whispers while watching Sam size you up. “I bet he wouldn’t mind lying to his big brother or, you could still fuck him.”
“No,” is your final answer. “I’ll call it a night. My shift is over, and I wallowed enough in self-pity for one night. I’ll grab a snack on my way home and forget that I ever dared to dream Dean Winchester would see more in me than a pair of holes he can use.”
“Hey, are you done for tonight?” Sam jogs after you, touching your shoulder gently. “I could drive you home, Y/N.”
“Sam, just leave me alone,” you don’t turn around to face Dean’s baby brother, too fed up after you saw Dean with that girl. “I’m not in the mood to tell you to get lost, okay.”
“I thought, as you and Dean didn’t match—” you twirl around to glare up at Sam.
“You thought what, Samuel? After your big brother decided I’m not good enough to bring me home to your parents you believed you can drag me into your bed or car to get a taste too? What the fuck is wrong with you Winchesters? Is any girl a whore you can use to you?”
“Whoa, I didn’t mean it that way, Y/N. I just,” Sam watches you wipe a few tears off your cheek, sighing deeply. “Dean said you were only friends with benefits. That you called things off.”
“I didn’t do shit, Sam. He—he used me whenever he needed someone to talk, rant, or fuck. I was stupid enough to believe I was more to Dean than a pair of legs ready to spread whenever he wanted a quick fuck. When I told him that I love him, he never even looked at me again.”
“Fuck, I’m sorry. Now I feel like an idiot,” Sam wants to touch your shoulder to comfort you, but you flinch away. “Sorry. I always had a thing for you and wanted to ask you out. I would never—” Sam swallows thickly when you choke out a sob. “Listen, I’m sorry. This was a stupid idea. Dean, he lied obviously.”
“Well, Dean is the great pretender,” you quip, watching the door of the bar fling open. Dean is stumbling out of the bar, alone. His girl is nowhere to be seen, but you don’t have the time to ask yourself why she’s not with him right now. “He made me believe we are friends, and then he made me believe we could be more than friends.”
“Can I drive you home? No catch promised,” Sam offers but you shake your head. “Y/N, come on. It’s dark and I won’t let you walk home.”
“I got a car, you know. Only as I’m working at a bar to make enough money to pay for my study doesn’t mean I don’t have a car,” you turn back around to walk toward your car. “I suggest you and your brother look for a new bar. I don’t need to see his latest conquests every night. He could’ve at least showed enough compassion to not rub it in my face.”
“New job?” Dean lazily leans against the counter, grinning when you roll your eyes. It’s been four weeks since the unhappy encounter with his brother and you had hoped Dean stays away from the bar you are working at. “Are you a bartender now, sweetheart?”
“Barney called in sick, and I can handle making drinks,” you try to act professionally and ignore the glint in Dean’s eyes and the way he licks his lips. “What can I do for you?”
“I’d like to ask you to not fuck my brother, but you already did so—” you slam your fist onto the counter, cause Dean to flinch at the sudden motion.
“What the fuck is wrong with you? I turned Sam down, or did he tell you he scored just like you?” you sneer, shaking your head. “I thought Sam is a better man. I was wrong, again.”
“So, you didn’t fuck?” Dean tries, leaning closer to search your face. “Why did he give me a black eye then? He came home from the bar, punched my face, and called me a coward.”
“I told him the truth, Dean,” you wipe the counter, ignore Dean tries to get your attention. He impatiently taps his fingers onto the counter, calling your name. “Sam didn’t know you dumped me, Winchester. That’s what happened that night.”
“Oh—” brows furrowed Dean watches you walk toward the other end of the bar counter to poor a girl a drink. The girl giggles, eyes glued to Dean’s face. “I see, that’s the reason he punched me. Sammy always had a thing for you.”
“He said the same,” huffing you walk back to place an empty glass in front of Dean. “Name me the drink or leave the bar counter. Only paying guests are allowed to lurk here.”
“Whiskey, neat,” he says, eyes glued to your lips now. “I told you we can’t be a pair that night. Father, he would never let me be with someone like you.”
“Yeah, I got that,” you pour Dean a drink before you turn around to check on the bottles, or at least pretend to do so. “You know, it would’ve been nice to know so months before I fell in love with you. You only told me so when I admitted my feelings, Dean. That wasn’t fair.”
“It was all I had to offer,” twirling back around you shake your head. “It could’ve worked out, without you catching feelings. I’m allowed to have flings and lovers.”
“I tried, I tried so hard. Why couldn’t you, Dean? It could’ve worked out if only you weren’t a selfish trust-fund prick using any girl you can find. We were friends before you kissed me. You started all of this, Dean. We should’ve stayed friends and never crossed that line,” you look at Jo walk toward the bar counter.
She heard your conversation and decided it’s time for plan B. Or rather plan Jo. She straightens her back, nods at Dean before she walks straight toward you to cup your face gently.
“Baby, I thought you will come around later,” you are too stunned to react when Jo presses her lips softly to yours. “Damn, I love those lips against mine. Well, not only against my lips.” she giggles, looking at Dean, giving him a wink. “Do you have anything interesting to discuss or can I ask my girlfriend about her latest test.”
“I-it went well,” you stutter, feeling your cheeks heat up. Jo grasps your hand, squeezes it tightly to silently tell you to play along. “Thanks to you and your encouragement, baby girl. Thank you for the great back massage and the orgasms.”
“Anytime, babe,” Jo smirks when Dean’s face falls. “Oh, you don’t look good, Dean. Is something wrong? Are you sick?”
“I just need another drink, I guess,” he doesn’t look at you when you peck Jo’s lips, telling her to wait for you in the back. “Or the whole bottle.”
“On its way,” you coo, grasping for the bottle to place it in front of Dean. “Pay now before you can’t walk straight, Winchester. I’m not your friend anymore and won’t take care of you.”
“Not even my friend anymore, huh?!” Dean must watch you follow Jo to the back. He glances at the bottle, shaking his head before he slams money onto the counter to leave the bar. “Fucking great, dad. She just found a new lover…”
“What was that Jo?” your friend giggles, giving you a wink before she bursts into laughter. “I mean, not that I would mind you kissing me but that was—”
“I heard Dean and thought I should jump in and save you. It’s called fake dating, babe,” you nod, glancing at Jo. The quirky blonde stretches her body, and you admire the way her nipples strain against her thin shirt. “I mean, we can always go on a real date. I don’t mind kissing a hot chick.”
“I don’t want to ruin another friendship, Jo,” your friend leans back in her chair to search your face. “Maybe after I licked my wounds and got better I’m ready to go out again. If I’m ready, you are the first person on my bucket list.”
“I’m taking you up on that, babe,” she grasps for your hand to squeeze it gently. “He’s not worth it, Y/N. Always remember, other mothers have hot daughters to hit on.”
“I know,” you close your eyes for a moment. “I wish I could tell my heart to not long for him any longer. I hate this feeling and the longing for someone you can’t have…”
While you wipe your eyes you miss the longing look Jo gives you. You are right, it’s an awful feeling to long for someone you can’t have...
Tags in reblog.
#Longing#badbitchesbingo#jo harvelle x fem!reader#former dean x reader#angst#unrequited love#heartbreak#fake dating#dean winchester#dean winchester fanfiction
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Forbidden
Chapter 3
A/N- Evey couple of chapters you will get Professor Hemsworth's POV and this is the first one 🥵 I really wanted to write his story and hear his thoughts too.
Summary- He can't get her out of his mind, the girl in the coffee shop. Will fate bring them together again?
Word count- 2.9K
Pairing- Prof!Hems X Reader
Warnings- Age gap (OC is 20) student/professor relationship, swearing, dirty talk
18+ Only!
Disclaimer: This is an entire work of fiction/AU and has no affiliation to real life what so ever! This is a fictional story about fictional characters who happen to share names and faces with some real people.
Posted: 5th Sept 2021
Taglist:- @innerpaperexpertcloud @pandaxnienke
@chickensarentcheap @jjpogueprincess
@longlostinanotherworld
@mostly-marvel-musings @darklydeliciousdesires
@monet-belle @help2700
@presidentpotts
Chapter 1 Chapter 2
Chris Pov
My Apartment was silent as usual, empty like always when I arrived home from work, throwing my coat and bag on to the sofa and slumping down next to them.
I couldn't stand the silence, it taunted me and brought back memories I'd rather not remember. I'd thought about getting a roommate but still hadn't gotten around to posting out an ad, the idea made me nervous. Although I hated being alone, living with a stranger would be even worse. I turned on the TV to fill the expanse of the large empty room that I'd work so hard for but ultimately meant absolutely nothing to me.
My mind began to wander back to this morning and the chance meeting with the most beautiful woman I'd ever laid eyes on. She'd taken my breath away and made me so nervous that I'd used some cheesy chat up line. I'd known at the time it would come back to haunt me tonight, no wonder she ran out of there as soon as she could. Thats why I hesitated, my hand brushed against the small of her back when I was about to ask her for her number and it took away my sensibility. I leaned in like I was about to kiss her, thank god I stopped myself though, how ridiculous would that have been?
I'd spoke to her for no more than ten minutes but somehow felt like I'd known her all my life. Asking for her number wouldn't have been the most unusual thing but she was in such a rush and I didn't want to make her late. There's absolutely nothing more I hate than tardiness.
I still couldn't get her off of my mind, she was beautiful, long dark hair that flowed down her back and the most piercing green eyes I'd ever seen. I couldn't stop looking into them, framed by dark eyelashes that made the emerald green pop even more. It's been a long time since I'd met a woman that made me feel as nervous as she did. The only thing is, she was young, much younger than me and I'd be fooling myself to think I'd actually stand a chance with her. Even if by some miracle I did, she deserved more than what I could give her, I was a mess, even after all this time I was still living in the past.
**********
I woke up feeling like a teenage boy again, a tent of my erection in the cotton sheets sprawled across my middle. I'd dreamt about the girl all night and honestly nothing about it was innocent. I rubbed at my eyes and stretched my muscles before finally getting out of bed, I had my first Junior Comms class to teach today and of course, I couldn't be late.
To say I was dreading today would be an understatement, I'd made a deal with the Dean to teach the Comms class because none of the other professors were willing and I was desperate for a job. I was hoping that if I exceeded expectations during my first semester I would finally get to teach psychology like I'd planned in the first place. Of course that meant being on my best behaviour and a lot of arse kissing, which I would do, albeit reluctantly.
The air was crisp this morning as I set off walking towards the university, luckily for me I didn't live to far away from the campus and the walk would help distract my thoughts because God knows they needed distracting. They always did.
Before I knew it, I'd arrived at the halls, looking up at the architecture of the building and realising my idea to walk obviously hadn't worked. I'd barely paid attention the entire time and it was only muscle memory that had gotten me to my required destination.
I held onto the door handle of the lecture hall and took a deep breath before stepping in, the room erupting into wolf whistles was not what I expected but admittedly better than what I was thinking. I scanned the room and my students, rolling my eyes at the girls lining the front row, their eager faces taking me in.
The class was full of typical students, the usual cliques you see at every educational institution. The jocks and cheerleaders, the nerds and oh fuck. The air was almost knocked from my lungs when I spotted her sat at the back of class. The girl I'd been talking to in the coffee shop yesterday, the girl that had been on my mind and in my dreams ever since. She was here, right in front of me which meant she was my student and younger than I'd actually thought. Fuck.
Even though she was now out of bounds I couldn't take my goddamn eyes off of her, the way her wavy hair cascaded over her shoulders. I could feel my cock tingling when my eyes fell to her low cut top and that unreal cleavage. I pulled my eyes away from her so as not to draw attention and focused on preparing for the lesson, leaving the students to whisper for a while longer while I recovered my composure.
Like a magnet, my eyes unwillingly kept finding their way back to her and she looked uncomfortable, squirming in her seat. I was making her uncomfortable and I still couldn't stop myself, I frowned as I subtly watched her cheeks blush and realised she's probably embarrassed because she'd been flirting with her Professor. Of course she'd be embarrassed, I was so much older than her but was it wrong that I didn't feel one ounce of awkwardness at the fact I had been flirting with a student?
All I could think about as I watched her tits bounce as she moved In her seat, was burying my face in her cleavage and I knew I had to look away before my dick reacted. The last thing I needed in a class full of students was to be walking around with a fucking erection.
I could stand there and watch her all day but certain students had stopped talking and they were waiting for me to speak and I'd almost forgotten why I was here In the first place. I really needed to get my head in the game, being infatuated with a student would definitely not get me the promotion I was looking for.
I pushed my hands in my tight pockets, hoping to stretch the fabric a little so my semi-hard dick wasn't so apparent, then my eyes were drawn to her again and she was talking to Jake. That pissed me off and I could feel my jaw tensing as I cleared my throat rather forcibly, hoping to get the attention of the whole class at the same time as distracting her from the rather friendly conversation she was having with another guy. A guy her age at that.
"Now I've got your attention, we're going to use our first session to get to know each other a little better. You'll be doing quite a lot of speeches so it's best if you feel comfortable with one another. I'll start by introducing myself." I looked at her again, gulping hard when I saw her with the end of her pen in her mouth and the way her lips wrapped around it. Fuck. "So, I'm Professor Hemsworth and I'm originally from Melbourne in Australia." I looked to her and she smiled, remembering what we spoke about yesterday.
A student started with the typical Australian stereotypes although I'm actually surprised no one told me to throw another shrimp on the Barbie. I laughed along anyway, I'd been expecting it, it's literally the first thing anyone who isn't Australian says when they first meet me. So when I told him it wasn't very original I meant it, I'd heard it a thousand times before and I'll hear it a thousand times again.
I told the class a little about myself before informing them they would do the same, it didn't go down well, the room filled with groans. I looked to her and she looked downright terrified, I sympathized for her, it wasn't easy speaking in front of a room full of people but was the best way to break the ice.
"Claire Abbott." I called, watching the blonde at the front stand, nervously. She giggled and twirled her hair around her finger as she smiled at me, I knew what she was doing. I quickly glanced at the girl from the coffee shop as she rolled her eyes at the blonde at the front, I smirked back at her, amused at her tolerance for predictable girls.
"I erm… I don't know what to say?" The blonde said, looking at me questioningly.
"Just anything about yourself that we might find interesting, the first thing that comes to mind."
"Well I own four horses and I'm the cheer captain." I had to stop myself from laughing when she rolled her eyes again but the smile soon disappeared when I saw Jake lean over to speak to her and the way she laughed at him made my blood boil. I was seething, not because they were speaking instead of listening but because she was speaking to him instead of me.
"You two at the back, we'll wait for you shall we?" I called them out, my voice more stern than I expected. I was pissed off that Jake would easily be able to get to know her and I couldn't. She stared at me, her eyes wide, she was surprised I'd called them out in front of everyone which made me even more pissed off because that probably blew my chances even more. What the hell am I thinking? What chances, I need to remember I'm her fucking Professor.
She sat silently through the rest of the class, I still couldn't keep my eyes off of her and thankfully neither could she. She looked flustered and I liked it, I liked that I could make her feel that way without even touching her. She was so goddamn hot I could hardly concentrate on what the other students were saying.
When I glanced down at the sheet of names in front of me and saw Jake's name my jaw clenched.
"Jake Hudson." I couldn't help narrowing my eyes as he stood up, I just knew he'd say something cocky and I was so fucking jealous of him right now. I closed my eyes for a second and took a deep breath, I needed to keep my cool, especially in a room full of students and her. If she knew what I was really like she wouldn't look at me the way she did.
"Hi, I'm Jake." I bit onto the inside of my gum, that bit of pain keeping me grounded. "I'm also from Australia." He gave me that fucking cocky half arsed smile I'd been waiting for and the adrenaline shot through me. I was thankful no one noticed apart from maybe the one person in here I didn't want to notice. She was watching me carefully. I had to loosen my tie a little as he continued to speak, I was burning up with rage.
I'm glad class was almost over, I needed a stiff drink and I needed it now. I looked at my sheet of names again and there were only a couple left, I wondered which one was hers. I needed to know her name. Fuck. I needed to know everything about her.
"Jessica Watson." She stood up. Fuck, Jessica, it was a cute name and fit her perfectly. I was mesmerized with her and the way she spoke as she tucked her long hair behind her ears. "These last couple of days have been pretty eventful for me." She looked right at me, what was she going to say? "I'm living the life of a romance novels heroine and I'm excited to see what the next couple of days bring." Oh fuck. Was she talking about meeting me? Or Jake? I like to think by the way she studied me as she spoke, she was talking about me. This was wrong, so wrong but why did it feel so right? I forgot there was anybody else in the room, my cock twinging as I pictured myself fucking her on this desk. I needed to stop thinking like this, it's unprofessional and completely immoral. I shook my head and turned back to the class.
"I hope we all feel a bit more comfortable with each other now, some of you shared some pretty revealing things." I looked at Jessica. "Some of you, not so much." Then raised my eyebrows at a group of guys in the middle of class that had used thier time to inform everyone about the party at their frat house this weekend. "I'll have a schedule for you all next time I see you, anybody that has any questions can see me after class, everyone else is free to leave." I looked at her one last time, hoping she'd use this opportunity to come and speak to me.
I sighed when I sat back at my desk and a group of girls took their opportunity, I wasn't in the mood for it but answered their questions anyway. I didn't take my eyes from Jessica, especially when Jake started speaking to her again. The girls in front of me were taking up my time, trying to flirt with me instead of asking relevant questions and I was over it.
"Do you actually have any questions about the course ladies? I have other things to be getting on with if not." I was a little short with them without actually meaning to be. I just wanted them out of my goddamn way so I could see what was going on with Jessica and Jake.
The girls finally left, more like stormed off but I couldn't care less right now. She was still sat at her desk which means she waited until I was alone which has got to be a good sign. We stared at each other for what felt like an eternity, the silence driving me insane so I cleared my throat and she blinked like I'd woken her from a daydream. What was she thinking about?
She packed up her things into her bag slowly, I could tell she was buying herself time but I felt relaxed now we were alone, in fact I felt excited which was completely ridiculous. I felt like a damn teenager.
"Did you need to talk Miss Watson?" I was amused and I needed to break the ice before the silence got the better of me. I leaned back in my chair and folded my arms across my chest.
"I erm…" She walked towards me, down the stairs, looking at her feet. She was unsteady and looked nervous as hell, was she going to tell me to back off? "I wanted to apologise, I had no idea you were a Professor." She stood at the bottom of the stairs, I was glad she wasn't too close. I don't know if I'd be able to control myself around her and lord knows I had to. The atmosphere was tense, neither of us really knowing what to say or do, all I could think about was ripping off her clothes.
"There's no need to apologise Miss Watson, I also had no idea you were a student but I was hoping to bump into you again. Funny how things work out isn't it?" I cocked my eyebrow at her, testing her, seeing how she would react to my comment. Something changed and she didn't look quite so nervous anymore.
"I think fate can be rather cruel Professor Hemsworth." The way she called me Professor stirred something deep inside me, a hunger I didn't know I had and when she moved closer to me I began to feel nervous.
"Oh really? Why is that Miss Watson?" She was so close now, I could smell her sweet scent of coconut shampoo. I wanted to touch her badly, I didn't though. I didn't dare because I knew if I did I wouldn't be able to stop myself and I must restrain, she's my student after all. It's wrong. It's forbidden.
I still couldn't stop myself from flirting, like an uncontrollable impulse and as soon as I opened my mouth to try and be professional I would just go right ahead and flirt. She was so outrageously attractive but the kind of attractive where she didn't know it and didn't flaunt it, which I found even more endearing.
"I was hoping to bump into you again too, only now the thought of what could've happened will have to remain a fantasy." My restraint was really being tested now, she was teasing me, egging me on and the fact she'd also been fantasising about me made it extra difficult to resist. I had to loosen my tie again, I needed my fingers to be busy so I didn't touch her. I had an internal conflict going on inside my mind and it was like torture, if this was day one of class how the hell was I meant to survive the whole semester?
"I better get to my next class, we can't have anyone thinking I'm your favourite now can we?" Fuck sake. I ground my teeth together, I was glad she was leaving, I couldn't take the tension any longer but at the same time I knew, with distance the desire would only intensify. She turned to leave and I couldn't stop myself watching her hips sway as she walked, her ass was so round and bouncy, it hypnotised me and that's when I knew I was in deep trouble.
#smut#chris hemsworth#chris hemsworth fanfic#chris hemsworth smut#chris hemsworth x reader#chris hemsworth x you#chris hems x oc#chris hems x you#chris hemsworth thor#chris hemsworth x ofc#chris hemsworth x oc#chris hemsworth imagine#professor#professor x#professor x student
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Dream SMP Recap (July 25/2021) - The Wilburger Ranvan
Wilbur comes up with his new calling: selling burgers in a burger van! At Phil’s suggestion, Wilbur teams up with Ranboo to do so, setting up their new business on the outskirts of Las Nevadas.
A brief summary of the week’s total events can be found at the end of the post.
---
VOD LINKS:
Wilbur Soot
Captain Puffy
BadBoyHalo
---
- Wilbur and Phil hang out in the Arctic. Wilbur has a proposition for Phil
- He says he met up with Quackity and it was a nice time. The one conclusion he came to is that Quackity is very resourceful
Wilbur: “As much as I may disagree with your views on anarchy, I must say, it’s pretty harmless. I -- I can’t hate you for it. I can’t hate you for enjoying literally living in a peaceful little village in the snow, I mean the server’s never been this peaceful since -- since all the countries and nations and cities and everything is gone. So Phil, I came to you with one question, one question...do you think Quackity should be allowed to be left unchecked?”
- Phil says no. The issue is, there’s no government, no police force. What Techno’s done is left a power vacuum and now Quackity’s come in with an unethical establishment, gambling...
- Wilbur wants to make a burger van
- They get interrupted by an Enderman ascending from the basement
- He knows there’s a bit of déjà vu, but the difference is that the burger van isn’t going to sell drugs this time. He wants every steak to have a name
- He’s done with being a source of authority, a president. His calling is just burgers, no ulterior motives
- Phil knows someone who would help out: Ranboo. The richest, most knowledgable man on the server, and he’s run out of things to do on the server
- Wilbur doesn’t want to play with Ranboo, but Phil threatens to kick him out if he doesn’t so he does, annoyed at being treated like a child
- Wilbur gives Ranboo his proposition
Wilbur: “I like to think, you know, let bygones be bygones, let’s bury the hatchet, let’s be -- Ranboo I’m gonna go out on a limb here...do you wanna be friends?”
- His next progression, after being a dead-terrorist-president...is to be a chef. Ranboo is onboard
- They start walking over. Wilbur asks if Ranboo’s heard of Las Nevadas, and Ranboo mentions their abandoned cookie post that was causing trouble. He wants to create competition for Quackity’s business. Eventually, maybe Quackity will have to make a deal with them, maybe even be their friend
- Ranboo wants to keep it respectful. Wilbur assures him that they already has the land necessary
- Wilbur wants to pick Ranboo’s brain and asks his thoughts on Quackity. Ranboo says he just hasn’t seen him in so long. Their last interaction before everything else happened was just that they were in the same cabinet of New L’manburg
- Wilbur didn’t know that Ranboo was part of L’manburg’s government
- Wilbur asks if he dislikes anyone. Ranboo says not too much, just people that he doesn’t agree with. Everyone is just a product of what they’ve gone through, so if you understand that, you understand the person
- If you align yourself with everyone, isn’t that more complicated? Ranboo says that’s why he’s just been living with Phil and Techno away from everything, trying not to involve himself in much, but he has a terrible radar on what’s involving himself and what isn’t
Wilbur: “What about Dream?”
Ranboo: “Well that’s -- well, with Dream it’s kind of like...all I’ve heard of Dream, all I’ve seen with Dream is just been like the really bad things that he’s done and everything, so I would say that I -- yeah, I don’t really like Dream, but I mean, he’s also not really someone that it matters whether or not I like him ‘cause he’s just away in that prison for a really long time, so I mean...”
Wilbur: “No trial?”
- They reach their competition and go into the fast food restaurant
- He peeks into the casino, but holes it back up. This building doesn’t benefit the consumer
- Wilbur places down some signs insulting Quackity’s burger place, guaranteeing those signs will never leave since they don’t care about the customer
- Wilbur shows Ranboo his area, which he's thinking of naming “Paradise.” Ranboo says it could be a neat play on words...pair-of-dice
- Wilbur and Ranboo decide to make the place red and white, retro-themed. Ranboo gives Wilbur Ranord and Wilbur goes off to gather some red
- Wilbur likes Tubbo since he’s strong-headed and doesn’t let people push him around
- Ranboo says when you can’t change someone’s mind, it’s no use to needlessly argue. Wilbur points out that Ranboo seems to be a bit more dynamic than a purely neutral, peaceful force. He’s somehow appeared in almost every conflict the server’s had since Wilbur died
- Ranboo says it’s because he’s bad at discerning things, but he’s been doing alright with his situation recently. He wants to help people, and sometimes he lets that desire to help people get in the way of what he says about himself
Wilbur: “Ranboo...why did you help to help me?”
- Ranboo needed something to do, and he also thought that Wilbur’s an alright person, so he wants to get off on a better foot because he doesn’t like having people not like him
- Wilbur asks why he doesn’t think Wilbur’s a bad person. Ranboo says he did bad things, but also went through things that made him that way and now he’s changed as a person since he died. He’s optimistic in that
Wilbur: (sniffs) “Good, uh...that’s nice. Thank you. Uh...I think I needed to hear that.”
Wilbur: “Can I be real with you man? ...I think I scare people.”
Ranboo: “I mean...yeah, I do the same thing.”
Wilbur: “No, not in -- no no, I mean I...I don’t think I...I think a lot of people share your idea, but they share your idea in trying to -- trying to keep me from hurting them, you know? Like they’ve seen what I can do and they don’t want me to do it again, so they adopt your emotion in order to do it.”
- He demolished Jack Manifold’s house twice, he completely ignored him in the war, and what it took for Jack to forgive Wilbur was just a sorry.
Wilbur: “And I know -- I’ve spoken to Tommy about Jack Manifold! And Jack Manifold is not the sort of person to forgive someone like that with a sorry! Imagine if Dream said sorry to Jack Manifold! What’s Dream done to Jack Manifold, huh? Barely anything! I imagine if Dream said sorry to Jack Manifold, Jack Manifold would ignore him. Do you know why? Because DREAM’s in prison, and I’m not!
“Dream is -- he’s had his comeuppance and I’ve not! My comeuppance was apparently not good enough for these people! They’re just waiting! Waiting for the next thing for me to slip up on them -- Ranboo, I’m not gonna fucking slip up, Ranboo, I’m different. I’m not Dream...god, I wish I was! Sometimes I wish, I wish I’d gotten that comeuppance but Ranboo, I’m not Dream. And I’m not gonna be Dream, and that’s...”
“I’m living in eternal Limbo...again. I’ve been through Limbo. I’m out of Limbo. And socially, I’m still in this Limbo, and man, Ranboo, hearing you say those words that you said to me? Do you remember what you said?”
Ranboo: “Y-yeah, I do?”
Wilbur: “You said...(sniffs) I think people can change, that’s number one. And number two, you said you’re scared that people don’t like you.”
- He tells Ranboo that they’re kindred. They have the same neuroticism, their strongest point. But anxiety is not their downfall. Wilbur’s parents are alive because they were anxious and didn’t let anything take them down
- Ranboo says they’re both thinkers. They may think in different ways, but they think at the same level
Wilbur: “I think you might be a bit braver than me in showing your true colors. I feel like with you, Ranboo, I never have to be guessing your next move. I never have to be guessing your hand, you know? I feel like life dealt us the same cards, and the difference is you build your trust by showing people your cards whilst I keep them close to my chest, and I feel like that might be the big difference.”
- He asks Ranboo what he feels about thievery. He’s going to steal Las Nevadas’ cows to make into burgers
- Ranboo makes some concrete and starts building the van. Wilbur rides off on a horse looking for some sheep
- Wilbur asks Ranboo about Tubbo and Ranboo talks a bit about Snowchester. Wilbur thought Techno was successful at getting rid of all the nations, but Ranboo says it’s not a nation. Wilbur doesn’t know about Kinoko Kingdom either
- Wilbur gets to the spider farm, which has Kanye West in it
- He heads back and they discuss names like Paradise or Wilburger
- Wilbur asks Ranboo’s opinion on Tommy and Ranboo thinks he’s great. Tommy’s gone through a lot, but it’s made him a good person.
Wilbur notes that he seems to think that everyone’s gone through something. Ranboo says yes, the only bad people are those who are evil without a reason why, but there’s not many people like that
- Wilbur names the first burger “Wilburger Vol. 1″ and puts a watermark on it
- Wilbur wants to ask Ranboo one last make-or-break question
- Chat suggests the “Wilburger Ranvan” and they like it
- They go to Quackity’s restaurant and Wilbur wants Ranboo to smash the windows. Ranboo does
- Wilbur goes inside and places TNT. He hands Ranboo the lighter and tells him to detonate it
- Ranboo does so. Wilbur tells Ranboo to go back to the van. He’s passed the test
Wilbur: “Ranboo, I’m proud of you man. You’ve -- you’ve taken a side.”
- Wilbur goes back and places a sign at the crater:
---
*****
Wilbur + Ranboo
Did this together
*****
---
“I love that guy.” (laughs) “I love that guy.”
END OF WEEK RECAP:
7/19 - Nothing much happens.
7/20 - Sapnap and George speak with Mexican Dream
7/21 - Foolish creates Philzavilla and breaks into the prison
7/22 - Nothing much happens.
7/23 - Nothing much happens.
7/24 - MCC, no updates
7/25 - Wilbur and Ranboo make a burger van
---
Upcoming Events:
- Captain Puffy’s Lore Stream
- Wilbur’s 11 planned streams
- Egg Finale Stream
- Tales From the SMP: “Space Race”
- Ponk’s prequel stream
- Ponk’s current-day lore with Sam
- Puffy’s Lore Cast
- Sapnap’s lore
- Dream’s lore video
- Quackity’s casino opening
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badum tss
pairing: katsuki bakugou x black!fem reader
summary: drummer bakugou and drummer s/o. band au
warnings: none
word count: 0.8
thought this was cute so i had to write it real quick
you are in a girl band with mina and jirou. jirou was the guitarist and lead vocalist, Mina bass and vocals, and you their drummer.
your band had just gotten popular off a cover on youtube and now the three of you were signed to a label called Plus Ultra, just released an album, and were about to go on tour with a popular boy band
since you guys were the opening act for the boy band, you got to spend some time with them and get to know all of the boys.
for the most part, they were pretty chill. you got along well with sero, kaminari, and kirishima but then there was bakugou
they two of you had big egos and would often argue. it wasn’t that bad though since the rest of your bandmates find enjoyment out of it
whenever the two of you were in the same room, there was always some sort of tension between you two. it wasn’t hate; it was definitely something else. something more reckless. some of his bandmates didn’t miss the way his eyes trailed down your smooth brown skin thighs or the way you couldn’t keep your eyes off his shirtless figure flexing every time he played the drums
oh god the drums
the competitiveness started once y’all were on tour. bakugou was watching you play and scoffed, saying he could do much better
“oh yeah, porcupine? prove it.”
“tch, i’m not wasting my talents on you.”
“oh I get it. you a little bitch, huh? it’s alright, I knew I was the best, no need to tell me.”
you knew how to get him riled up so easily it was annoying. the two of you would go at it all the time during rehearsal, sometimes in the middle of a song. jirou would tell bakugou to leave because he was being so distracting and you’d stick your tongue out at him teasingly as he argues back
but it was a different story when he just watched you play. it was during tour where he and his friends wanted to sit and watch y’all do your thing. bakugou couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. he won’t admit it but it was definitely attractive having someone almost on his level when it came to the drums
one time when your band was done with their performance, kaminari and sero told y’all to stay on the stage so they could settle this once and for all
“the best drummer will be decided by our very own fans. how’s that?”
the competition was every on social media the next day. it was the way the two of you went at it on the drums trying to one up each other every second. unfortunately for the two of you, it ended up being a tie
“I totally won that.”
“Huh?! In your fucking dreams, dumbass!”
swear some of y’all’s fans can’t decide whether you hate each other or to ship you. because at one point y’all will be hilariously yelling at each other on and off stage. but then there are small moments people catch, especially on stage together.
the way you always sat next to you while y’all were chilling and talking to the fans. how you’d get rare smiles from him whenever you made a joke no one else could hear. or how he always found some way to touch you, like having his arm around your shoulder, pinching your arm teasingly, or poking you with his mic
no but for real, fans really started putting pieces together
at first it was all speculation and rumors. there were canid pictures of the two of you hanging out after tour. him liking all your Instagram photos and you posting him on your private snap. fans would often argue over ships saying their not real and that they’re just friends. jealous fans would also say it’s just pr to get the girl group famous
but you guys weren’t too subtle about it.
and despite what you might think, bakugou really didn’t want his relationships out in the public like that. cuz that’s shit’s his business and his business alone
but once y’all do confirm it, the fans are both excited and not surprised in the slightest
all your friends already knew and wouldn’t stop teasing you, Mina saying she knew it was meant to be from the start
kaminari and sero keeping loads of pictures they secretly took of you two which bakugou found out about.
safe to say they didn’t want to know what he was going to do to them with two drumsticks
the two of you still see who the best drummer is and sometimes either you, mina, kaminari, jirou, or kirishima post your chaotic videos of y’all on the drums because it honestly is a mess
© all content belongs to ackasamii 2021. do not modify or repost.
#bakugo x reader#bakugou x reader#bakugo x black reader#bakugou x black reader#bakugou x poc!reader#katsuki bakugou headcanons#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugo katsuki#katsuki bakugou x reader#bakugou hcs#bakugou hc#drummer bakugou#bakugo fluff#mha x black reader#mha x poc!reader#mha x reader#my hero academia#my hero academia x reader#bakugou imagines#bakugou headcanons#mha band au#bnha x poc!reader#bnha imagines#bnha x reader#bnha x black!reader
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Heart by Heart | Chapter VII | Raul Mendes
*secret agent AU*
Y/N and Raul have been friends ever since they could remember. And falling in love with your best friend can be pretty tricky and messy 99% of the times, add that to the fact they're constantly risking their lives side by side on the field since they're both secret agents, and the best team that's ever existed. Perfect recipe for disaster.
Oh hi, this is the seventh chapter of this series, you can find the first ones here. I can’t believe we are already halfway there! Please read the warnings on this one, if you don't feel comfortable with the contents listed on the "warnings" section, please read something else, there are a lot of other works on my masterlist and on the "fic rec" hashtag on my blog. Please give me some feedback and I hope you guys like. Happy Reading!
previous chapter | masterpost | next chapter
*Word Count: 5.5K+
*Warnings: cursing, jealousy, , man who can’t take a hint, angst (if you squint!), things might get hot in this (not smut though, sorry guys!). And Raul fluff, that’s a very important warning.
Please don’t read it if any of this subjects make you uncomfortable, feel free to check my masterlist for other writings.
*Posted: August 12th, 2021.
-*-
Raul was nervous.
Y/N knew he was anxious about something the moment he stepped foot into her apartment. They’ve known each other for so long, they’ve spent so much time together, that she was able to tell his fidgeting mannerisms and stiff shoulders from miles away. But under their current situations, him being this nervous could be a bad sign. He could’ve been discovered or something like that, which meant they’d have to leave the building in seconds and run as far away as they could.
Before she could stop herself, her eyes roamed all the expense of his body, looking for bleeding or any potential injury she could find, but none could be detected. Raul had left an hour ago for a morning run, Janet decided this was their day off since they’ve been working like crazy, so she forbid them from working on anything. So when he left after having a late breakfast with her, she wasn’t even worried about him being in danger, but seeing him all nervous was making her tense.
“Hi, doll” he said trying to sound casual but his voice sounded almost mechanic.
“Hey” she greeted from her spot on the couch, carefully placing her bookmark between the pages of the novel she picked up the other day “is everything okay?”
Raul dropped his keys and phone by the door as he nodded, moving behind the counter on the kitchen to fill a glass of water for him as he used that to calm himself down a bit “yeah, I just- do you want to go out tonight with me?”
“Uh, sure, is that all?”
Raul seemed surprised at that “So, uh, you’d go out with me? Just the two of us?”
“Of course, we’ve done that before” she said still trying to understand his reaction. Was he asking her out on a date? And if he was, wasn’t it obvious she’d go?
“Yeah, I know, but this is different, I think we both know things changed between us, sweetheart, and this could be a chance for us to forget our reality for a second and just let things happen, maybe?” the normally confident, borderline cocky demeanor he normally carried around was gone. His body language showed clearly an almost shy side of him that Y/N wasn’t aware existed.
And she did know what he was talking about. They’re always close and intimate, he’s a very touchy kind of person and that’s definitely his love language, so that wasn’t knew. But spending the night and waking up cuddled to his chest was new, different in a good way, and that left her crush into growing by the second. It was getting harder to ignore, and honestly, Y/N didn’t have it in her to avoid it that much anymore.
“Yeah, I’d like that” and with that his face lit up completely and she flashed him a bright smile.
“Yeah?” he asked as he approached her, pressing a kiss to her forehead as she nodded “good, saw this really nice restaurant by the docks, it’s Italian”
“Oh great, what time do you want to leave? Just so I can get ready” she said looking up at him as he stood up to his full height.
Raul starting pulling his shirt off as he moved to the hallway leading to her bathroom “Seven works for you?”
“It does it’s perfect, I only need to help Celine out, but I’m having lunch with her to do that” Y/N replied as she forced herself to focus on the book in her hands and not the perfectly designed muscles on his abs as he leaned on the doorframe to the bathroom.
She heard Raul chuckled as he closed the door, not locking right after. Y/N would need a few hours to get herself together if she wanted to survive this ‘date’.
-*-
She ended up spending most of her afternoon with Celine and trying to calm down. If Celine noticed, she didn’t express anything, maybe too worried about her little mission tonight, but she was a good distraction. Trying to explain the best use for all of the equipment she receive and discussing the plan over and over again. Then she was told to leave and rest, boss’ order since it was their little day off.
Y/N got back to her apartment at around 5 p.m. finding Raul napping on her couch, the little fluffy blanket she had cuddled close to his chest. She had to hold back a coo not to disturb his sleep, and physically stopping herself from playing with his hair or caressing his face. So she decided to shower while he rested, so when he was up he could have the bathroom all to himself.
Before leaving the bathroom, she peaked her head outside of the door to check if Raul was still peacefully sleeping on the couch, which he was. So she took that to her advantage as she crossed to her room with only a towel wrapped around herself as she tried to figure out what she could possibly wear. She only packed really basic outfits, and sure, she didn’t really need to dress up and Raul’s seen her with every single type of outfit, so if she got all dolled up it wouldn’t be the first time or actually impactful.
But bless Y/N from weeks ago from deciding to throw a delicate sundress amongst all the gear she brought in her suitcase. It was a backless dress, with spaghetti straps holding the sunflower dress on her body. She felt pretty and comfortable in it, and it was enough to convince her this was it. A soft knock coming from her bedroom door brought her back to reality as she ran her hands down the front of the dress nervously.
“Yeah?” was all she said.
“Can I come in?” Raul asked before actually opening the door, only doing so after getting her consent “oh wow”
“What?” she felt a little self conscious under his gaze, she knew she’s been out with so many beautiful woman and she hated this stupid insecurity rising in her chest, but she could really help it.
All of her stupid questioning and anxiety were quickly washed away when she looked at him, finding Raul speechless and still staring at her, mouth slightly agape.
“Shit, you’re gorgeous, holy fuck, come here, doll” he said as he offered her his hand, which she gladly took as he pulled her closer, twirling her around blowing a low whistle “you’re so ducking beautiful, I love this dress on you”
Y/N shook her head giggling “oh stop it”
“I’m serious, baby, you’re just so perfect, sometimes I don’t even believe you’re real” as his praises slipped out of his lips she felt her face getting hotter and hotter.
“Oh God, you’re such a sap” all she could do was cover her face with her hands.
He gave her million dollar smirk pulling her hands away to look at her properly “only for you, sweetheart”
Y/N shook her head “I still need to put on some makeup” she warned him and he nodded, placing a kiss to her forehead.
“Take your time” he then added “I’ll change real quick and I’ll wait for you to finish getting ready, yeah?”
“Okay” was all she mumbled before she saw him leaving her apartment to walk down the hall to his.
She grabbed her little bag of makeup items deciding to do something a little bit nicer than her very basic everyday routine. Y/N padded her way still barefoot to her bathroom, propping herself up to sit on the sink and get closer to the mirror, placing her items nicely next to her. Just as she decided what she was going for, she heard Raul coming in. She let him know she was in the bathroom and she wouldn’t take long, but to her surprise, as she was prepping her skin, he slipped into the bathroom silently.
“Is everything okay?” she asked quietly looking at him through the mirror.
He was standing right behind her as he lifted his hands to place them in her waist, moving her hair to one shoulder to another, placing a gentle kiss to the newly exposed skin. Y/N felt a shiver run down her spine as she fought to keep her expression as neutral as possible, but he was making it hard. His cologne making her feel lightheaded, add that to his soft touches and eyes locked with hers through the mirror.
He was wearing a silky black button up, with the first few open, most of his chest exposed, his silver chain peaking through. His classic tight black jeans and his curls as perfect as ever. Raul looked like a fucking dream and being so gentle she felt like this was a dream, and it it weren’t for the cold of his rings against her slightly heated skin, she would be sure this was just her mind playing tricks on her.
“Yeah, just like watching you get ready” he mumbled placing another kiss to the place where her shoulder and neck met, making her let out a soft sigh.
Y/N trapped her bottom lip between her teeth as she met his gaze through the glass “you’re a little shit, you know that?” and he only chuckled lowly in his chest, shaking his head “let me finish so we can go!”
“I’m not stopping you” he said with a teasing tone and his smirk, but leaned away from her exposed skin, his hand never leaving her waist “but I guess I’ll behave cause I’m a good boy
“Of course you are” she chuckled, shaking her head, as she got back to her work.
She carefully applied a few items of makeup not wanting to look like it was too much, and every once in a while, she glanced back at Raul that stood patiently behind her. His thumb rubbing slow circles at her waist from time to time as he watched every move attentively. He smiled gently at her when he noticed her staring, a slight blush coating his cheeks.
“You look so pretty, doll” he admitted at she leaned forward to apply some mascara “so so pretty”
Y/N giggled shaking her head “did you hit your head or something? What happened to you today? You’re clingier and sweeter than ever”
Raul chuckled “I’m just enjoying my day off with my best girl, that’s all, I’m just happy and glad we got to do this” and with that she almost turned into a puddle “and just wanted to remind you how pretty you are”
“Thank you, darling” she meant it and she turned her head to place a quick kiss to his cheek, feeling her face heating up considerably “almost done, only a little highlighter and lipgloss”
Raul nodded as she finished applying the products and setting with a spray, before turning around to climb out of the counter. But before she could jump to get off, he had his arms around her waist to pick her up and carrying her to her bedroom as she squealed after laughing at him. He carefully placed her back on her feet at the bottom of her bed with a smile on his face.
“There you go”
Y/N laughed patting his chest softly “thank you” and then she turned to grab her shoes and her purse “do you think I should grab a jacket?”
“It’s probably better since it’s by the waters and we might need to walk a bit to reach the place I have in mind” he said with a shrug as he bit his lip “you can take mine, the leather one by the door”
“Are you sure?” she asked turning to fully face him completely ready, and she swears she saw his breath hitching.
“Yeah yeah, of course” he was quick to nod and she smiled at him in response.
“Okay!” Y/N practically hoped to the from door to grab the look, throwing it over her shoulders without actually putting it on and she waited for him.
Raul trailed behind her like a trained puppy chuckling, extending his hand towards her “you’re absolutely gorgeous”
“And you’re insanely pretty” she added as she interlaced their fingers letting him pull her closer to his body, his warmth radiating through his opened button down and the soft material of her summer dress.
“You think so?” Raul asked with a smirk and she nodded trying to hold back a laugh with an eye roll “good, pretty enough for you?”
Her eyes widened as she realized that behind his smirk he was actually curious, maybe even a tiny bit insecure, which made zero sense to her“Are you kidding me? You’re literally like a model of something”
“Thank you, sweetheart” he smiled genuinely, placing a kiss on her forehead before pulling her towards the door “now come on, promised you dinner”
-*-
The ride to the docks was pleasant, with him goofing around and singing horribly off tune to whatever song come up on the radio (and even though he would never admit it alive, he actually had a pretty decent singing voice, while Shawn was the singer, Raul wasn’t bad himself at all). He had his hand gently placed on her thigh, not high enough to make things weird, instead it was a comforting weight keeping her grounded and lightheaded at the same time.
They couldn’t park next to the restaurant, having to find a spot on the parallel street alongside everyone else who wanted to venture on the stores and diners. Raul was quick to hop out of the car and open the door for her, to which she just laughed and kissed his cheek as a thank you, locking her arm with his as they walked around the block.
The place he picked was a small cozy restaurant, looking all warm and homey as soon as the stepped foot in it. They were quickly whisked away by the host and walked to their table as they sat on a booth by the window, watching all the boats and movement from the street. Y/N sat across from him so they could both have enough room to feel comfortable.
“This place is so cute” she was the first to break the silence that installed as the walked in.
“You liked it?” his shoulders relaxing as she nodded her head cheerfully.
She looked around before turning back to face him “I loved it, never could’ve imagined we’d be in a place like this under this circumstances, but I’m glad we are”
“Me too, I wish I would’ve asked you out on a different situation, maybe a few months ago” he said scratching the back of his neck looking anywhere but her face “and I know this isn’t a proper date and stuff, but I think it’s a great start so we could figure out where to take this, but if you want it to be a date it’s fine by me! It’s just- I-“ Y/N couldn’t let him get into his head, so she gently placed her hand on top of the one he had resting on the table.
“Hey” she called softly as he finally looked at her, so she shot him a small smile “we don’t have to label anything for now, yeah? We don’t need to worry about this right now, we have other stuff in our heads, okay? We have all the time we could ask for and I don’t mind waiting a bit longer”
Raul smiled at her and brought her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to each knuckle (an old habit of his, it started when she punched a guy in middle school for bothering Peter, he kissed each bruise and swollen knuckle he could, saying she was so brave and so strong) “yeah, I’m normally not his nervous, and I know I technically don’t need to be, it’s just you’re too important to me for me to fuck things up”
“You won’t, don’t worry, yeah?” she offered and he nodded “now, let’s discuss an important matter, what are we having?”
“Great question and I have no fucking clue” he admitted and she laughed at him.
They ended up picking a plate for them to share since it was a big portion as the talked, and time seemed to fly around them. They’re always so easy going, conversations flowed so naturally and it felt so right, they both ended up forgetting why they’re so nervous to begin with. This wasn’t a date date, it was just an excuse to understand where they stood and how they wanted to proceed, and they’ve known each other for years, it’s not like they had to make amazing first impressions if they wanted this to work.
They decided against ordering dessert since Y/N claimed she saw an ice cream shop down the block and that she was pretty much stuffed anyway. So Raul payed the bill against her protests, but she ended up giving in with a promise she’d be the one to buy their ice creams. They walked hand in hand down the small street that was surrounded by people, and as she claimed, there was this beautiful ice cream shop.
They placed their orders as she paid and he grabbed both of their treats, and ended up deciding to just eat outside on the light breeze to watch the boats and the water. They walked to the end in the street, leaning into the small wall that kelts kids from falling or jumping on the water. They’re just lightly chatting about random stuff, recounting old embarrassing stories when she visibly saw Raul’s demeanor change drastically.
But before she could ask what’s wrong or turn around for potential triggers, she felt a calloused hand on the exposed skin of her back. When she whipped her head around to see whoever was standing behind her she was surprised to be met with the man himself. Geonoff Reyes was standing right behind her.
“Oh hello, Y/N, how are you?” his voice made her stomach churn.
“Oh my God, hi!” she smiled politely turning completely to face him, her back now pressed to Raul’s front, unconsciously moving away from the man’s gross touch and into Raul’s warm chest “I’m okay, you remember him, right, love?”
She didn’t need to turn around for Raul to know she was talking to him “oh yeah, hey man, how have you been?” he had an arm around Y/N’s waist in a second, bringing her even closer to him and she went gladly, the weight of him on her comforting.
“I’ve been good, working a lot, trying to expand my business”
Y/N squealed softly in a fake excitement “Oh that’s awesome!”
“Yeah, congrats, man” Raul said with a smile he wasn’t even sure how he managed to fake.
“Thank you, guys, it’s been hard but it’s worth it” Reyes’ said with a smirk on his face “are you guys here on a date or something? I’m not interrupting anything, right?”
“Oh no, it’s okay, we’ve been down here for a while now, but yeah, Raul has been trying to get me to come down here for a while so he made it a date night and I couldn’t really say ‘no’” she explained as she placed her hands on his bicep, holding him in place.
“And are you liking it so far?” his slightly annoyed tone didn’t go unnoticed by Raul, as he glanced at the arm he had wrapped around Y/N as if it was something revolting.
“Oh yes, it’s amazing, really, such a beautiful view” she added pointing to the boats.
“Agreed, but you’re a a better view” Geonoff chuckled at his own flirtations joke and Y/N chuckled softly when in reality she wanted to puke “well, in case you ever feel like it, I own a couple of boats, so I could take you on a ride if you wanted”
Raul almost lost his temper there, but he felt Y/N slightly squeezing his muscle and he forced himself to relax and to keep his cool.
“Oh thank you, but I’m a little afraid, rather be here on land where I know I’m safe” she said with a sweet smile, but she had a bitter taste on her mouth.
“In case you ever change your mind, you have my number” he added with a wink “I gotta get going, have a meeting in my yatch now”
“Have a nice night, man, good luck with your business” Raul forced himself to speak up and Geonoff looked up at him almost as if he had forgotten he was there and flashed him a smile, but not without looking him up and down with disgust.
“Oh yes! Have a great night” Y/N waved politely “Don’t let us keep you from getting to your meeting, wouldn’t want you getting late”
“Good night, drive home safely, yes?” Geonoff said, reluctantly peeling his eyes from Y/N’s figure.
“Of course, I’ll keep her safe, don’t worry” Raul said kissing her hair and she giggled in response.
Geonoff waved before walking in the area she supposed was where he’d climb on his yatch, and only then Y/N noticed the man in suit surrounding him, heavily armed. When he was finally far enough she let ou a breath she didn’t know she was holding, melting completely into Raul’s chest. He held her tighter so she wouldn’t slip.
“Come on, it’s getting late, my love, let’s get you home” Raul said pulling her in the direction to their car.
The whole way home Raul didn’t utter a single word and Y/N was still processing everything, so they both sat in silence, the only noise was coming from the soft purr of the engine and the low music coming from the radio. As he parked oh the garage, they both got out of the car and moved to the elevator almost automatically, still without speaking up, mostly due to possibly leaking some information.
As if he could read his mind, when she started breathing a bit heavier due to the stressful situation and the weird vibe they had between them, Raul quietly slipped his hand in hers, giving it a gentle yet reassuring squeeze. She then left a breath she didn’t know she was holding, stepping out of the elevator as it hit their floor and dragging him behind her like a puppy to enter her place.
“Are you okay?” Raul asked as soon as she locked the door and turned to face him.
She nodded leaving her shoes by the door, alongside her purse and hanging her (his) leather jacket “Yeah, just a bit shocked, you know? Wasn’t expecting him to be there, Celine’s been following him for the thing he had, but we didn’t know he’d have a meeting on a boat”
“Yeah, sorry about that” he mumbled mimicking her actions as he scratched the back of his neck.
“It’s okay, you did nothing wrong, honey” Y/N said finally actually looking at him, noticing the prominent frown on his face, a small pout on his overly pink lips “hey, it could’ve happened to anyone and anytime, you couldn’t have known”
Raul huffed a breath shaking his head as he plopped down on the couch, running a hand on his hair “yeah, but this was one of our only chances to relax for the past weeks and he ruined it everything”
“He didn’t ruin everything” she was quick to stop him, sitting down beside him, tucking her legs under her body as she rested her arm on the backrest of the small couch, stretching a bit to place her hand on his shoulder “I had a lovely time and I honestly can’t remember when was the last time I actually had this much fun on a non-date date”
Raul turned his face slightly to place a gentle kiss on her hand “really? You’re not just lying to make me feel better?”
She gasped feigning offense “what do you take me for?”
“A liar” he stated without blinking, and she was quick to try to get up and make a dramatic scene, but he was faster to wrap his long fingers on her wrist near his face, pulling her back down and in his lap as he laughed “come on, doll, it was just a joke”
“You're an idiot” she said laughing trying to climb out of his lap, but the arm that was wrapped around her waist stopped her.
Raul shook his head “no, no, stay here, sweetheart, and we’ve already discussed this” he said looking pointedly at her, but the small grin playing on his lips gave him away and she shook her head “Yes, I am an idiot, but I’m your idiot”
“I don’t mind that” she said with a shrug and he smiled at her.
“Good thing you don’t” he chuckled, comfortable hand on her back as he drew random shapes on the exposed skin of her back making her shiver slightly “you know, the jacket looked really good on you”
Y/N huffed a small laugh shaking her head“Yeah? Might steal it”
“You shouldn’t announce it, silly, but I have to admit, you could probably steal my whole closet and I still wouldn’t be mad at you” he said turning her in his lap to face him and making her properly straddle him “you look too good in my clothes for that” he added voice slightly lower.
If Y/N had been drinking water she would’ve choked, but she tried to keep her face as straight as possible “you're such a flirt”
He then laughed “Only for you, doll”
“Oh shut up, you literally flirt with yourself on reflexes and might have flirted with the dog we saw earlier” Y/N pointed resting her hands on his chest as she laughed.
But Raul shook his head trying to hold himself from chuckling “well, it’s not intentional, didn’t know you were jealous of my own reflection”
“I'm not the jealous one here, darling” she had a teasing glint in her eyes, but he didn’t even hesitate before admitting, knowing denying would be ridiculous at this point.
“What do you want me to do? Everyone wants you, I can’t help it sometimes” he said and Y/N arched a brow at him “okay, okay, most times, but you’re just so fucking pretty and smart, and talented and good and of course I get jealous”
She was left slightly speechless. Sure he always complimented her, about pretty much everything but they’re normally casually thrown, here and there, but since they weren’t so directly she was able to brush it off with a joke. But never so many in a row and looking her straight in the eye. Y/N looked down, dropping her hands on her lap and fidgeting with her ring.
But then she felt his hand tilting her head slightly up so she could look him in the eye, her whole face burning up, and he smiled so sweetly at her she was even slightly breathless. His hand came to rest on her jaw as his thumb caressed her cheeks gently “did I say something wrong?”
“No, no, no” she was quick to add “no, you’re just-”
His voice was quiet when he inquired “What?”
“So sweet and-” she sighed looking around and shook her head.
“Sweetheart?” his voice was like honey, all warm and making her feel tingly as she looked down at him again and she didn’t know what to do.
Raul was staring at her lips and they’re suddenly too close, she didn’t even notice how close to his face she was, her noses almost touching, and maybe they gravitated closer to each other unconsciously, almost like magnets. But she wasn’t complaining. Her mind having a tiny short circuit and she got lost in his eyes.
He leaned forward a bit more, giving her a tiny eskimo kiss, their lips brushing “Am I reading this wrong?” his voice an octave lower and she shook her head, leaning in the rest of the way.
She caught his lips in a tentative kiss, hands splayed on his chest, not fully confident on it, but all of her self doubts flew out of the window as he sighed happily kissing her back, pulling her even closer to him and keeping her flush against his chest with a hadn’t around her waist. She literally felt like she was on the moon, her head spinning as he enveloped her in everything him.
His hand gently caressing her face, his other one on her waist, his cool rings a stark contrast to the heated skin exposed by the low-cut back of her dress. His smell was everywhere, his thighs under him and the soft fabric of his silky shirt. Raul didn’t hesitate to slot her bottom lips between his two, deepening the kiss and taking control of it.
All this years, all his pent up emotions taste on his tongue as he swept it over her soft glossy lips, and she was quick to open her mouth to him. Bringing one of her hands to tangle on the small curls at the base of his neck, pulling on the soft chocolate curls and he could not hold back the small whine that left his lips and she swallowed it. The soft strokes of his tongue against her making her want to his him forever.
But as if he sensed it, he pulled back placing a long kiss to her lips and trailing his mouth in slow wet kisses down her neck “can't believe I waited this long for this to happen” but Y/N only hummed in response, too lost in the feeling and trying to catch her breath, pulling his hair a little harder and he let out a deep groan “fuck, sweetheart, you’re gonna be the death of me”
She then titled his head up by his hair, before glueing their lips back together, his hand dropping to her exposed thigh and her breath hitched in her throat. But before things could go any further, she heard a strong knock on her door, making her snap her head to look at the front door of her apartment.
“Y/N, sweetie, I need help” she barely recognized Celine’s voice in the fake sweetened tone she used for her cover.
“Oh shit, they must be back from the mission” she whispered as she turned to Raul with wide eyes and he looked completely blissed out “what are we going to do?”
“Honey, is your boyfriend in there? Hope you’re both decently dressed” Celine called with a teasing tone and it didn’t seem fake at all.
Raul held her face in his hand trying to get her to focus and said it in a hushed tone “it's okay, go open the door to her and we don’t have to say anything just yet, we can talk about this later, yeah? Everything’s fine, I just need a second to- uh, you know, calm myself down a bit” he added the last part a bit shyly and she nodded taking a deep breath.
“He's here but we’re decent” she shouted back with a fake laugh as she scrambled out of his lap, leaning down a bit to arrange his curls and cleaning the excess gloss that transferred onto his lips “Coming, darling, you want me to kick him out?” she offered shooing him out of the couch and aligning the throw pillows to make it less obvious.
“No, no, he can stay, it’s just Trevor again” Celine came up with the stupidest excuse she could think of.
Raul nodded to her as he hid behind the kitchen counter, casually grabbing a beer. So she took a deep breath and tried getting herself together before unlocking the door, being met with Celine looking at her suspiciously in casual attire.
“Oh hi, come in” Y/N said as she straightened her dress and pulling the door more open, watching as Celine stared her up and down but not saying a thing about her slightly disheveled state.
Instead she looked at Raul by the kitchen counter and said “Jack's coming with Tom in a sec” and sat down on the couch.
Y/N felt Raul’s gaze on her, but instead she just turned to close the door and then sitting by Celine, trying to ignore those damn butterflies on her stomach.
-*-
*Please reblog or like this post if you liked it so I’ll know.
*I’m sorry if there are any spelling mistakes.
*Please do not repost this without giving me the credit, this is a completely original piece and I do not give permission to copy this!
*Hope you guys enjoyed it!
*xoxo
-🌙
#shawn mendes#shawn peter raul mendes#sm#shawn mendes writing#the mendes triplets#mendes triplets#raul mendes#raul mendes writing#raul mendes au#heart by heart#writing#secret agent au#the mendes triplets au#mendes triplets AU#shawn mendes au#au#alternative universe#shawn mendes fanfiction#shawn mendes series#shawn mendes imagine#shawn mendes fanfic#shawn mendes fic#shawn mendes x reader#shawn mendes x you#shawn mendes x y/n
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thoughts on the green knight (2021)
i have a lot of Thoughts that i was originally going to post to my main but this is what the sideblog is for. tl;dr under the cut
tl:dr: i think overall the themes were well-represented, but i couldn't figure out WHY they changed the things they changed - some examples i was looking for were things like making it more accessible to a modern audience, or fitting into the allotted time, but those weren't really there. it was largely incomprehensible to anyone who doesn't have intimate knowledge of the poem; i think that inaccessibility like that is a MAJOR flaw in a movie (again at the bottom)
things i am docking points for, in chronological order:
christmas day: this isn't like important to the plot but it's super annoying to me personally when people think the date for the beheading is christmas day when it's actually new year's day. we've all heard 12 days of christmas it's not that big of a stretch to figure out they're still celebrating it on new year's
morgan being gawain's mother: this is a big one! arthuriana has so few female characters, and erasing morgause removes a major one and messes up a lot of stuff by moving her to the beginning. more on this later.
sub-bullet of that actually: why is arthur so old when morgan is not. what is UP with that
other sub-bullet of morgan in the beginning: her giving gawain the belt and it getting taken by the kids who mugged him. i can see it representing loss of innocence and his mother not being able to protect him anymore, but then its role switches to being a lot more symbolic later (to match its role in the poem) in a way that is confusing for the audience. more on this later as well.
re: the kids mugging him in the forest: i GUESS this symbolizes loss of innocence? maybe? but it just makes gawain look like an idiot and lengthens this part of the movie so i'm docking points.
the fox: i literally do not get the point of this from a metaphorical standpoint. literally as his guide it made sense up until the end. trying to convince him NOT to go to the chapel seemed...counterpoint to its motives up until then?
the exchanging of winnings: this is a big one because it's so crucial to the poem and like. how do you mess it up this bad while still including it. first of all lady bertilak gave him the book before the exchange was even called so to the audience it looks ridiculous. and don't even get me started on the weird camera-esque portrait!
then like. she gives him the belt on the FIRST DAY. completely fucking up the timeline here. why would you do that.
and THEN she doesn't even kiss him! she fucks gawain completely without kissing him,, so when lord bertilak kisses him it makes literally no sense from an audience standpoint. if you're gonna make it an exchange of winnings it should be an even exchange so it. makes sense? (this is where 'it makes no sense! compels me though.' applies.)
the belt fucking scene: would've been fine except lady bertilak said 'you're no knight.' this (clearly modern) interpretation of the text wasn't there at all. in the poem, the problem wasn't gawain kissing her; it was him failing to give all the winnings to lord bertilak. /that/ is what made him fail. this is actually my biggest beef with the movie's adaptation for a modern audience.
the old woman in the bertilak's castle: SO stupid. just there to make gawain (and the audience) uncomfortable. since morgan has been removed piecemeal and dropped at camelot, this old woman is useless and confusing, especially without the juxtaposition between the poet's description of her and their description of lady bertilak.
the end of the beheading game: first of all, gawain getting there early is dumb and renders the knight's three swings narratively useless
the dream sequence: narratively does a decent amount to contextualize the meaning of the green belt, but ONLY if you know where it's going. if you know that the belt is supposed to symbolize gawain's failure to complete the quest and hold his oath, it makes sense! otherwise it just seems like a belt he had sex for one time and now refuses to take off. confusing.
also i hate it as a device. wasn't good when twilight did it, isn't good here. (i don't actually remember any other movies that did this off the top of my head)
the actual end: terrible! you cut out like, the most important part of the poem: when the green knight actually explains everything, including who he is, the fact that morgan's involved and her motivations, the point of the exchange of winnings. this is further confused by the movie green knight stroking gawain's face and calling him 'his brave knight.' if you don't know that that's the guy who kissed him ten minutes ago you're even more confused now
not to mention we don't see if the green knight actually decapitates him. like i get that you're going for ambiguity here but. why.
speaking of ambiguity, it's nearly impossible to decode what's going on if you don't know the poem really well. i touched on this in the other points but. i want to call it out explicitly
things that i liked but are not worth any points:
this being Gawain's Big Break: i actually thought this fit VERY well thematically, however there were too many scenes where he was like. Suddenly Famous and Well-Regarded. the worst was at the bertilaks' castle, because in the poem they're not supposed to know about the beheading game. also this takes away the Essential Medieval Romance Trope of the knight attempting to hide their identity
gawain being just a lil bit slutty: not executed well. see the belt thing above.
the giants. they were cool but served no purpose. also why were they all hairless with boobs what was that about
the fact that gawain and lord bertilak did in fact kiss: i so desperately want to give points for this but it felt again like our modern view of sexuality speaking over the text. gawain should have given kisses freely and as part of the exchange of winnings but it felt like he Couldn't do that as the hero which was disappointing. it felt like a Big Deal when it isn't presented as such in the text.
things i am bestowing points for:
the winifred scene: unhinged and unnecessary subplot of helping a random maiden in the woods COMPLETE with a barb about how you can't ask for anything in return? talented. brilliant. incredible. amazing. showstopping. spectacular. i have no complaints about this addition.
the pronunciation of gawain's name: in college i had a professor who told us she pronounced it ga-wen when it was without the e and guh-wayne when it had the e. so props for matching that i guess
gawain's yellow cloak. i want one.
the camera shots were beautiful
the dialogue felt SO good. when it started in verse i was super excited and. throughout it really wasn't distracting? very good
costumes were not accurate even with my limited knowledge but they slapped so i don't care
I ALMOST FORGOT THE ACTING which shows how good it was. very very
tl:dr: i think overall the themes were there and it was very pretty, but i couldn't figure out WHY they changed the things they changed. also, it was largely incomprehensible to anyone who doesn't have intimate knowledge of the poem; i think that inaccessibility is a MAJOR flaw in any movie
#arthuriana#the green knight (2021)#the green knight (2021) spoilers#the green knight spoilers#overall i think i would like it better the second time when i wasn't watching it to analyze everything that was different or odd
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max’s top books of 2021 :3c
top ten bookposting... TWO!!! (you can find last year’s here!) once again, this is ranked completely on the basis of my opinions (which are abstract combinations of “how technically good is this book?” and “how much did i enjoy it?”)
i read... a lot this year. half again as much as last year, because i started uni in august and guess who is taking literature classes! that said, this list was still incredibly difficult to make because Reading More Books does not necessarily equate to Enjoying More Books. under the cut because i have a lot to say.
first off: the runner-ups: American Moor by Keith Hamilton Cobb (a one-man play about being a black man through the lens of Othello; jesus christ the power in this writing; i should reread this); Teenage Dick by Mike Lew (not sure how i felt about the ending but oh my fucking god this is everything.); Milk Fed by Melissa Broder (incredibly striking character voice; started amazing and sagged in the middle imo); History of Wolves by Emily Fridlund (books that feel like getting hit over the head with a baseball bat); and Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel (i know i’m late to this one but. crying cat image)
and my top three anticipated 2022 releases: I Am Margaret Moore by Hannah Capin (what can i say. 2020 left me a hannah capin groupie); Ellen Outside the Lines by A.J. Sass (GAY PEOPLE AND NONBINARY PEOPLE AND NEURODIVERGENT PEOPLE?); and Hell Followed With Us by A.J. White (THIS BOOK... LAST NIGHT I DREAMED I HELD YOU IN MY ARMS.)
without further ado! the list, with my love increasing as the numbers drop:
10. O Human Star by Blue Delliquanti
if you like gaytrans people and robots, you need to read this. if you like gaytrans people but are relatively neutral about robots, you need to read this. if you hate robots. i guess you shouldn’t read this. but it’s FREE ONLINE, so what’s really stopping you from giving it a shot? the entire time i was reading this, my thoughts were split between “ooooooohhhhhmmmmygod this is such a trans story, this is such a trans story, this understands being a closeted trans person and the agonizingly slow process of realizing it better than pretty much anything i’ve ever read” and “PAIN PAIN SUFFERING AGONY PAIN.” and also “GAY PEOPLE KISS ON THE MOUTH A FAMILY CAN BE TWO INVENTORS AND THEIR ROBOT CLONE DAUGHTER.” nearly made me cry in my in-person latin class because i was reading instead of doing my work. 10/10
9. The Chosen and the Beautiful by Nghi Vo
this was one of my most anticipated reads of 2021, and i was right. i was right. it’s a gatsby retelling (already great) starring a bisexual vietnamese jordan baker (even better) WITH MAGIC (!!!) and some of the most breathtakingly beautiful prose i’ve read all year. i read this with a group of friends, and we collectively agreed that the soft magic system was sometimes a little vague (particularly in terms of how magic’s existence affects the rest of society), but that was the only criticism i had because jesus christ this was amazing. falls under the category of retellings make me think “FUCK, the og text is so good” while also being incredibly gripping and gorgeous in their own rights (this is the best category of retellings).
8. The Iliad by Homer
OOOOOOOOO let’s get into the NERD ZONE PART OF THIS POST. i read the iliad twice this year, because i am insane. first so i could read TSOA after it (a book that... i did not love. but that is another matter), then again because i had to for class. you guys, i think homer can write. do not talk to me about hector unless you want to check out how hard i can cry (and on that note, shoutout to An Iliad by Lisa Peterson and Dennis O’Hare because. bark bark bark rufrufrufruf grrrrr bark bark etc) (and also, shoutout to the chilliad.)
7. The Drowning Girl by Caitlin R. Kiernan
i will say flat out that this book is not for everyone. the synopsis is super vague, and the book itself is written in a winding and abstract style that some might find frustrating. but i happen to be the exact target audience of this book about a fictional schizophrenic lesbian writing her fictional memoir about a series of events that might have been Actually Magic or might have been a delusion. this book is SO fucking meta in an absolutely delightful way. there are SO many literary and artistic references. the aforementioned style is deliberately a representation of how imp (the main character)’s mental illness shapes her writing, and as a mentally ill person whose brain ALSO shapes my writing, i loved that, and i love how it tied into the themes, and i love this book a lot, and i wrote a much longer review so i will leave it at that.
6. A Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin
. okay. look. look at me. look. it would be SO easy, culturally, homosexually, to hate game of thrones. but this book fucks INCREDIBLY severely. there is a REASON a song of ice and fire has become the template for this kind of fantasy, and that’s because NOBODY IS DOING IT LIKE GEORGE R R MARTIN. putting a dragon and some gritty straight sex in your fantasy novel is not going to make you the next game of thrones!!! there is WORLDBUILDING here!!! there is LORE!!! there is a vast interwoven tapestry of characters who all feel devastatingly human even when they’re terrible!!! there are ICE ZOMBIES? i don’t even care about ice zombies but nobody fucking told me that! i hate george rr martin because i want his job so bad (getting away with writing 800 page fantasy books except mine will be about gay people) but even despite that i can admit that this book deserves the hype. (have been reading the second one at the speed of 1 page per eon while at college. turns out a book of this scale is not the best to read in scattered intervals at college. oh well)
5. The Wicked and the Divine by Kieron Gillen & Jamie McKelvie
i actually don’t read a lot of comics/graphic novels (maybe i should read more? i don’t know; i like prose) and so i had to be coaxed into wicdiv by the esteemed mx. @yvesdot. and thank god for it because oh my god. OH my god. this series takes a rad idea (“hey, pop stars are treated like gods. what if they Were”) and completely fucking slams the gas pedal to 100. the plot twists in this series broke my fucking NECK (two of my reviews read “THIS ISSUE WAS LIKE GETTING HITCHED TO A MEAT HOOK AND HAVING MY BODY SWUNG AROUND AT HIGH VELOCITY WITH A BUNCH OF FLESHY THUNKS AGAINST THE WALL.” and “my head is a mailbox and wicdiv is the group of rowdy teenage kids in cars in the 80s coming to hit me with a baseball bat”). the art is BREATHTAKING; this is a series for people who like women. every character is SO compelling and so horrible and so imperfect and once i started reading it was near impossible to stop. the last volume made me lie in the fetal position on my dorm floor. i made a PLAYLIST for this series. i, a man who only makes playlists for shakespeare shit. the playlist is called “fuck off i am not crying” ADN GUESS WHAT . I WAS
4. The Last True Poets of the Sea by Julia Drake
there are the books that you read in a day or two and enjoy, and then there are the books that you ignore your zoom class to finish while holding in your tears on camera. there are the shakespeare retellings that slap, and then there are the shakespeare retellings written specifically to appeal to mentally ill theater-oriented WLW hyperfixating on twelfth night whose younger brothers are also mentally ill. realllllllly hard to describe the amount of emotions i have for this book. realllllllly hard to not lie facedown on the carpet thinking about it. (no, you don’t have to read twelfth night to read this; yes, you should read it. immaculately written. wonderful book. plus look at that fucking COVER. gay rights)
3. War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy
and once again. we return. to the nerd zone. maybe i have stockholm syndrome. maybe that’s why i’m sitting here about to type “war and peace was maybe the most fun reading experience i had this year.” because if you’re gonna read a 1200 page book, you have to start enjoying it at SOME point, right? just as a defense mechanism? but oh my god war and peace is so legitimately good. i hate tolstoy’s pedantic misogynist pancake ass but that man can write characters in a way that makes me want to levitate off of my chair into the air and/or scream into a pillow. on a serious level: part of my enjoyment is because it’s actually really good; part of it is because i have a whole group of friends who also enjoy war and peace, and so i got to discuss it and listen to their playlists and look at their art. and part of it is definitely because the spring of my senior year of high school, bored out of my mind in my last set of required classes, terrified of the looming shadow of College TM, was probably the best time in my life so far to pick up a doorstop about confused and depressed young adults trying to find their places in the world despite the feeling that they’re wasting their lives and their talents and missing “the answers” of life. also every bitch in this book is gay. listen to great comet
2. The Aeneid by Virgil
we saw this coming, right. like we knew this was coming. the first time i read this poem (notably, when i hadn’t read homer yet and couldn’t pick out all the allusions to the iliad/odyssey) was at the start of 2021, because my ten-person latin 5 class translated it. and i found it kind of boring, but the class was insane (positively. for the most part), and i thought, well, whatever, it’s a decent story even if i don’t like the style of epic poems. and then that Decent Story sunk into every nook and crevice of my brain in the following months and haunted me like the shade of [idk, name someone who dies in the aeneid, there’s a handful] until i finally got to read it again in one of my uni classes and had to physically stop myself from overtaking the entire class with my answers to the professor’s questions and then proceeded to follow the professor after class to talk with (at?) him about it and then made him read two different essays about it. i think when it comes to “thinking about aeneas” i am in the top 100 people on the planet. virgil put his pussy into every single line of this poem and it’s one of my personality traits now
1. The Complete Works of William Shakespeare
speaking of max’s personality traits. okay, here’s the part where i confess that i did not actually read the entire complete works this year. i WANTED to, and intended to, but i didn’t start in earnest until june (i thought i was going to do a book club with a friend! and then we did not.) and as a result of that + uni, i really doubt i’m going to finish the last four or five plays in the next five days. (maybe i could. but i would like to do other things at some point this week.) that said, i DID read twenty-five new shakespeare plays (and hamlet and as you like it again) and most of the sonnets. in general my opinions and meta posting are on my shakespeare blog; specific shout-outs go to my new favorites, ranked just under hamlet and lear: henry iv part 1 (HOTSPUR MY FUCKING BELOVEDDDD. HAL ONE OF THE CHARACTERS OF ALL TIME), julius caesar (this is my version of a page-turner vacation read. both times i’ve read this i did it in 48 hours and i’m insane about brutus and cassius.), and twelfth night (far and away my favorite comedy, and probably my favorite read of the year).
if you’ve read this far, you have to add me on goodreads and we will be legally wed. everyone tell me your favorite reads of the year i want to know
#max.txt#misc book tag#you can tell when i really really love a book because i go 'i have to write a retelling of this right the fuck now'#i guess it's a love language?#readings
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