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ghouljams · 2 months

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(Oop I clicked the unfollow button instead of the ask one fnjklADfnmdlks)

Anyway!! When I'm doing A/B/O usually I'll have it where betas are obviously born as whatever sex they are and this never changes, but for afab alphas and amab omegas, I typically have them develop traits from the opposite sex during puberty. They will go into their first rut or heat respectively, which is the first initial influx of hormones, and the body only begins to change *after* that first rut/heat, hence why you can't determine their status at birth.

But that's beside the point- what I really wanted to say that I'm in love with the concept of the internal knots for afab alphas in your take on the AU. Normally I prefer afab alphas with a phallus and amab omegas with a pussy, but if I were to read anything where amab and afab omegas and alphas keep the bodies they're born with, then yours is probably the only one I would read. There's just something so delicious about Ghost being tied to Goose, who is offering him so much praise and affection and the poor guy can't get away or hide. He's probably bright red and trying to hide his face lmao.

OH ABSO- FREAKING -LUTELY

Gotta keep Ghost where he is so Goose can tell him all the wonderful things she loves about him, and rain praise down on him while he shudders and whines for her. Very good to make sure he can't go anywhere when she flips them over and grind against his lap to keep him gasping while she tells him what a good boy he is, what a perfect omega, how she's so sure he's gotten her pregnant with that last one(how she's going to take care of him and lover him for the rest of his life) while Ghost covers his eyes with his arm and avoids looking at her. Poor boy bright red in the face and incapable of doing anything but mumbling out thanks as he attempts to return just one(1) compliment.

I'm going to get a little into the politics of omegaverse, and why I structure my au the way I do under the cut.

I totally understand the appeal of afab alphas with phallus' and amab omegas with vaginas. I think my main argument(I guess) against that, is that it has always seemed to me to equate dominance/submission and societal roles with genitalia?

Now, the whole point of omegaverse originally is to have basically a built in dom/sub system in society and also mpreg. I get that, but listen. When I hear that afab alphas a "rare" or "uncommon" I cringe. It just feels very... like you're creating this world where endotype(a/b/o) matters more than gender and you're still saying afab folks are unable to fill the dominant societal role? This you is not you Grizz, it's like a general fandom you, I don't want to sound like I'm attacking you. Again I love an afab alpha with a phallus, best of both worlds in my mind. It's just something I notice.

Also with the sex characteristics reflecting endotype, it feels like a reduction of that endotype down to just the reproductive role it plays, and leaves betas with almost no defining characteristics. Beta has to have some evolutionary function or defining trait or they just wouldn't exist.

I break my understanding of omegaverse into "parts that must exist": knots, pheromones/hormones, heat/rut cycles, pack dynamics. Those are the four things that define it in my mind. The problem is that humans are so unable to stick to "being" any one thing. I cannot conceptualize a world in which every person of a certain endotype(or gender) acts the same way. I also just, as an afab person, never understood why omegas get all submissive and hazy when they're basically ovulating? Like I get aggressively horny, emphasis on aggressive. I have point blank grabbed my partner and told him "if you don't take your pants off right now-"(we had a good laugh about it afterwards don't worry). I love omegas as the dominant party, the initiators, and alphas as the worry warts that are desperately trying to keep up.

Maybe it's my gender studies minor coming out that I have so many questions about the inherent politics around omegaverse. Not the kink stuff, but just the way that authors conceptualize endotypes and leave afab alphas as this rarity or thing that must be made closer to amab alphas. I don't think it's a conscious choice to equate "alpha" with masculinity and "omega" with femininity, and I'm sure no one thinks about this as much as I do, but it's interesting to keep coming across it.

I think of a/b/o as a sliding scale of hormones similar to testosterone/estrogen. Where an excess of one hormone or another during puberty would cause certain traits to develop. An excess of the alpha hormone causes a knot to develop, an excess of the omega hormone would cause that neat little mate bite spot to develop. Betas would still have the hormone just in either a more even mix, or at lower levels. I feel like this also allows people to be trans-endotype, if you can supplement hormones for e/t why not a/o?

Also for ambiguous genitalia at birth, why not give it to betas too? Again it just always seemed weird to me that there were basically 2 species of humans: betas and Alphas/Omegas. Give everyone both parts. I want amab alphas with pussys. I want to destroy those men's cervix.

Anyway. I think the human experience is so varied and weird that endotypes would just make it even more varied and weird. And idk if anything I've said has made any sense, but if I wanted to make sense I wouldn't have destroyed my brain with fanfiction.

#ghoul speaks #omegaverse #a/b/o

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yallemagne · 2 months

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This year, I'm not doing Dr*cula D*ily

Or any other substack but DD is the biggest. I have numerous reasons for this decision that none of y'all are gonna particularly care for, but ya know, just so we got our expectations in order: I'm not gonna participate in DD this year (maybe never again), I'm probably not gonna reblog many posts related to it (doing so would be counterintuitive), but I am holding myself to finishing Orice (at LEAST the base fic).

Now, why?

TL;DR: Mental health crisis brought on by internet harassment and overprioritizing social media. It's not fun anymore, folks.

DD just... it completely ruined the novel for me.

It was a nice phenomenon, but it took a wrecking ball to my mental health and self-worth. Now, I'm not saying DD's creator personally did something to spite me (or maybe I am, he knows what he did /j), but this whole thing? It wasn't good for me. It was never good. It was sometimes fun, but most of the time it made me want to end it because of thumblr notes.

That's fucking stupid. My life is not worth internet validation. My art is not worthless just because my numbers are not as big as the biggest big shots in the fandom. I'm not a horrible person when other people handle personal disagreements regarding headcanon with defaming rumours and impersonation. But hell! My view of reality was horribly skewed.

A while back, I unfollowed all the gothlit tags I previously followed because 1) Some people (active and popular members of the fandom, mind you, not bots or trolls) were posting honest-to-god name-dropping harassment in the tag because "it's a popular tag so more people will see my callout post" and 2) I reached a point where seeing anything related to the novel on my dash just set me off. It didn't even need to be drama-related anymore. Mentions of the characters, mentions of popular AUs, just the very content of this book became triggering to me, and I really didn't miss the content when it was gone, as sad as that is.

And the kicker? I've come to realize that I probably dislike more things about the novel than I actually like about it. Not only is it tied to some of my darkest moments in recent memory, but it's also just... a book with many flaws that I could go on and on and on about. Sometimes, it straight-up made me furious, like seething mad, and I think I'd rather just be happy. But even when I would try to channel that energy into being happy, I always felt I had to over-clarify or else I’d get bombarded with anonymous messages. If you’ve seen any of my posts from during that time… chances are there is a passive aggressive “btw people can have opposing opinions from you about an old book and it doesn’t give you leave to stone them” or several tags of “#this is a joke #a jooooooke #for the love of god #if y’all don’t stop”. I bet it was as annoying for y’all as it was for me.

P.S. Mutuals/friends, do not worry. Y'all keep doing y'all. I can and will block tags if seeing your posts triggers me. So, I suppose my only request is to properly tag, but I've been saying that from the very start.

I just want to move on to other things.

I took a break for Lent. I needed it terribly. And... not gonna lie? I almost didn't want to return. I never got an itching to just log on and "check in". I very successfully avoided tumb altogether. I came back because "I gotta come back eventually" and also like, this is my main hub where I update when I've written a fic, and ya know... I'm not gonna let toxic fandom bs rule my shit.

During my break, I got back into gaming. More specifically, I started playing Hades again. And listening to Epic the Musical. Aaaand boyyy did that bring me back to my Greek mythology phase. I have a Greek mythos/Hades sideblog btw: @areopagusimp. It's cringe, if you can't tell by the blog name.

Back when I was into Hades game and general Greek mythos, my expectations were so much smaller, but yet, my goals and will to create seemed so much bigger. I made art that no one gave a single solitary shit about (except for my friend), but I was happy. Maybe I'm wearing rose-tinted glasses, but... even if I wasn't as happy then as I remember being... haha at least I wasn't receiving threats and insults in my inbox back then :))). That was the most fun thing about the gothlit fandom. I hope every single chickenhearted angry anon is proud of their behaviour.

But yeah, whatever I end up doing, I’m striving to not let it run me into the ground.

But... What do I do now?

I have so many WIPs (art and writing) for the novel, and it's very disappointing that I didn't get to finish them before it all turned sour. Hopefully, I can still finish them, it just won't be with the same distress I worked with before. Hopefully, I can post that stuff and fully manage my expectations, not crash and burn when only a few people like it. Because hell! A few people liking my stuff? That's amazing, really. I shouldn't take that for granted. At the same time, I'm setting a boundary for myself. Placing my self-worth into the hands of people who I don't know, who don't know me, and who aren't even paying for the art? I need to stop that. Who the hell is that gonna serve? Absolutely no one.

My number one goal is to finish Orice. It is somehow untouched by my aversion to the novel; it is my safe space. I want to honour it and honour the longtime readers who have stuck with me. It's gonna be hard, but it's gonna be worth it for me.

This feels attention-seeking, and it kinda is. I'm not tagging the main subject and I'm not allowing reblogs because I want this to stay isolated (and hopefully prevent backlash/misunderstandings), but ya know, no matter how much I try to keep this small, I'm still posting it online. But I just feel like I needed to get this off my chest. I don't really owe everyone an explanation, but I want there to be one for my own sake... also it's much easier to generalize and make a post than contact each of my friends/mutuals on here and unload stuff onto them that I'm not sure is too personal or not.

For those of you who are reading: I love y'all. I love the good people I've met through all this mess. I want to keep the good apples, not throw out the whole harvest, alright? Dunno how much you'll care for my art when the subject is different, but... eh. If y'all are willing to try?

#i'm writing this in march #dunno when it will be posted #update

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introvertedlass · 1 year

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I have a theory that will probably not make anyone happy 😅

I actually mentioned some of this somewhere else, but I am going to add to it.

I think this entire thing is CAAs doing. I saw this somewhere, and they basically implied that they sell their actors for the higher bidder. So the agency gets a chunk of money for this, they promise the actor something in return and the actress get a exposure. This was said about Seb and Aly at the beginning.

So I do think this situation was an offer of "Hey, we think you should do a PR relationship with this person" and him agreeing. I think this was more "we are your talent agency we control the roles you receive and negotiate on your behalf for more money, you are going to do it" but he got to negotiate was the terms of the PR, which I think Sebastain didn't get to do because he had just signed with CAA but chris has been there a while so he sway with them. Because to me, this feels like a bad copy and paste job from the Sebastain/Aly show but smaller.

My theory is that instead of doing many pap walks like Seb did, where we see them kissing holding hands, going shopping, cring ass birthday video, we got breadcrumbs from her friend on NYE, family/friends follows and unfollows, and the other stuff as well, like the person explain in the article post you shared, they decided to use the fans for this and not the media, in a way to keep the whole this easier to hide in the future. This was any new joiner or casual person when they looked him up. All they got to see is NY pap walk, and now the video months later. There is no virtual evidence unless you take a long dive into the fandom, end even then, unless you know your way here, you won't be able to find blongs that talk about it. I know a lot of people don't like that part, but I guess it was better for him to use us than have to kiss her in public and since he can't seem to hold her hand for 5 minute I think the footage would be of hi throwing up directly after the kiss.

So yes, I think the story was planned ahead of time, and it was part of the contract. Will see other things, maybe I would t be surprised. I think he is genuinely trying to get out of it as soon as possible, and that's why they said a year and now trying to say 2 so that she and he leaches can get our of his life.

I want to point out that I am not babying him or making excuses as some of you will try to say, but I am simply theorising about this like everyone else is.

Sorry about my English it's not my first language.

Your English is wonderful, no need to apologize. You make more sense than me and it's my mother tongue.

I agree with a lot of your points. In a previous post, I talked about the changing landscape of PR and I think we've seen that play out with this crew and with Sebastian Stan.

All of this has been calculated to cause the most chaos.

#chris evans pr #chris evans

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bees-tornado · 7 months

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about me/blog info

introduction, before you follow, fandom stuff, etc. below the cut!

(star dividers courtesy of saradika)

hi everyone, i'm bees! here's some info about me/my blog:

i usually go by bees (he/him). please feel free to call me by name or whatever silly little nicknames you can think of.

if you know me irl no you don't. this is my happy little cringe fandom habitat <3

i love video games (mostly Nintendo and especially Pokemon/Fire Emblem) and anime (mostly Shounen and Shoujo), and most of the things i reblog are fanart and posts i think are funny

Fire Emblem: Three Houses is my favorite game of all time, and i post about it incessantly (more about this later)

Bernadetta von Varley is my favorite character of all time and i love her dearly and also she is my wife 💜

you can learn more about my favorite things here!

it is very difficult for me to come out of my shell and be myself (even in a space like this), but i returned to tumblr because i want to try to have fun and be cringe and be free, and i'm trying my best every day <3

PLEEEAAASE feel free to send asks/tag me/etc., especially if we're mutuals, and especially about my favorite things! i am far too anxious to initiate anything but i like interacting with people :)

on that note please be patient with me sometimes it takes me a long time to respond to things but I INTEND TO I PROMISE

i don't post art much but when i do you can find it under #my art

taken <3

before you follow (it's not too long i promise)

please don't follow me if you're a minor. i'm hesitant to mark this blog explicitly as 18+ because i don't really post nfsw stuff here besides joke text posts, but i don't want minors here regardless, sorry!

this is a 🏳️‍⚧️ trans friendly blog 🏳️‍⚧️

i don't do DNI's, but i do block/softblock/unfollow/blacklist/filter freely

i tend to avoid fandom discourse, including proship/anti/etc. discourse. my policy is that if i'm uncomfortable with a particular type of fandom content, i will fall back on my previous bullet point as necessary. the same goes for when i see people engaging in bullying and harassment over fandom stuff

this is not a spoiler-free blog, especially for FE3H and Naruto. i will occasionally tag spoilers (usually for jjba and xenoblade), but not consistently

FE3H-specific stuff

please please PLEASE talk to me about Fire Emblem: Three Houses for the Nintendo Switch you're not bothering me i promise

Bernie and Sylvain are my favorite guys i think they're neat

i'm too old and tired for fe3h lord discourse. i have my own favorites and opinions, but i tend to avoid following blogs that post aggressive or uncharitable takes about the main lords

i came from twitter where Bernadetta would only really trend for negative reasons, so please understand that i'm sensitive about the way people talk about her and her fans. no hard feelings if you don't like her, and i actually agree with a lot of criticism about her writing, but i try to keep anything too mean out of sight

That's it for now! Thanks for reading/skimming/whatever you just did, and I hope you'll stick around!

#pinned post

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gwasgy · 3 years

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I'm NORMAL.

Also dont read my tags if you font want to see a bunch of nonsense it's really long

#i have ti read book or i ll die #this is a threat to myself to put doen my own phone but put DOWN #put DOWN my own phone. i dont know how in the hell i will be notified if the owl house starts episodes again how does it. how does it work #why is there a hiatus i dont know!!! the qualms of being mostly a blog about a dead show. i dont get. updates.#i love cartoon #spn has effected me greatly and i can never uh? return to my original form but i used to be a cartoon loser #stebven universe gravity falls adventure time HOMESTUCK over the garden wall avatarlastairbender loser like i sucked and wS lame Nd liked #i liked it and it was lMe and i didnt care and supernatural is lame but in a differently embarrassing way #that makes me embarrassed to post about things i used to like before like?? rebranding #it wasnt an intentional rebranding and i dont keep track of followers so if you unfollow its okie #mutuals i am sad if you leave:( i will miss you....#but otherwise its okay #i am a general main blog not spn #i might start really not holding back on the cringe and just post homestuck everyday and keep everyone on their toes #but i eill be sad abohr #about. i will be sad about. some people :(#dont leave but i will post homestuck but DONT LEAVE IM SORRY #idk. i have a hs blog but i dont use it nobody follows me there i just :( i used to be a simple homestuck blogger #love the thrill of the cool good interesting characters and dialogue #and now :( i can even reblog cool jade art #i love jade art... shes so silly cool and has dog ears.... i love that..... i want to show everyone i know cool jade art shes so cool #ive reread it far more than ive watched spn and yet #i dont know how to finish these tags but :( yeH #/d #i want to reread the dave n dirk dialogues real bad. right now.

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mattzerella-sticks · 3 years

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Ticking Photobomb, T, 1.6k

Carlos Reyes/TK Strand, Evan ‘Buck’ Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Evan ‘Buck’ Buckley & TK Strand

TK loves Carlos, and wants their relationship to work out. Before they can recapture even a semblance of the bliss they shared, Carlos needs to fix his mistake and properly introduce TK to his family. Until then... Carlos deserves at least some punishment. He only hopes Buck will forgive him, for involving him in his and Carlos's first big fight as a couple.

Only it's not Buck's forgiveness he'll need.

ao3 link

based off of this post

He’s wary. He and TK are supposed to be enjoying a delicious meal outside at a nearby park, sun high in the sky, bright but not too cruel, as they sit together on a thin, yellow blanket, and Carlos cannot enjoy any of this beautiful date because a tiny voice in the back of his mind warns him that TK’s silence is a cover for something more sinister. His boyfriend’s smile, aimed at his phone as it has been since they arrived, means trouble. The small, continuous giggles that eke free sound like alarms. Giggles offered with every bite, where he’d type a short message and then set his phone down; only to grab it halfway through its jingling ringtone – TK never usually keeps that on. Carlos remembered him complaining how he hates ringtones, prefers having his phone vibrate. Why is it on now? And why is he texting while they’re on a date? And why does his laughter make Carlos cringe?

“Who are you texting?” he asks, finally, Carlos pushing the plastic container with his half-finished sandwich to the side.

TK glances up from his phone. “No one.”

“No one?”

“Just a friend,” TK says, pinning Carlos with a strange expression that squeezes his heart. It makes the sweat pricking his temples relocate and journey down, rolling towards his chin. Carlos wipes at his face as TK adds, “seriously, you don’t have to worry.”

It’s the way he said ‘you’ that does Carlos in. That has him dredging up what he already considered resolved since before they sat down. Discussed, at length, over the phone, with Carlos apologizing repeatedly. TK assured him they were good. “I thought we were good?”

TK sighs, “We are good.” Then, he mumbles, “As good as any two friends can be.”

Carlos’s frown deepens, mouth resembling a severe gash carved into his face. “I knew it!” Carlos cries, pointing at him. “You’re still mad at me.”

“I never said I wasn’t!”

“You said it was settled –“

“Because it is,” TK insists, a heavy glare drawing all breath out of Carlos’s chest. The façade he wore for their date has been pulled away, and Carlos sees exactly how distressed TK remained after he introduced him to his parents as his ‘friend’. Even with Carlos promising that he would remedy the situation soon, gather his boyfriend and family together and explain the truth of his romantic life, TK clings tight to the pain Carlos caused by letting fear sway his choice, both at the farmer’s market and when he let TK walk out of his home, relationship dangling from a fraying cord. It frays ever closer to breaking. “It’s settled until you work up the nerve to have that dinner you were talking about.”

Carlos splutters, “That’s not – you know, with the pandemic how hard it’s…”

His excuses further irritate TK, who retreats into his phone. He texts someone else. Perhaps the same person he’s been texting this entire time. “Then it’s settled.”

“If it’s so settled,” Carlos asks, “why even bother agreeing to our date today?” He gestures at their unfinished meals, probably cold and stale. If they weren’t, it’s not like Carlos feels like eating anymore.

TK stops texting, smirking at Carlos. Usually, it riles Carlos up in that he wants to kiss it off of him. Right now, Carlos swallows the urge to shove his boyfriend onto his ass. “A date?” TK asks, words languid and breezy, spaced out by palpable sarcasm. “Why would you think this was a date,” he continues, phone tapping against his chin, “we are just friends after all…”

Anger and disappointment converge violently inside Carlos, fighting for release. Neither can, as his vibrating phone pulls his focus from TK. He opens the message on autopilot, confused since it’s from TK. Confusion then drops into the cesspool of his emotions, like Mentos in Coke, and Carlos explodes.

“Why did you send me this?” he demands, showing TK a picture he sent to Carlos of himself. A picture they took, together, when visiting a lake one weekend long ago during the summer. A picture taken after they spent the entire afternoon swimming, bathing suits forgotten on the pier. A picture where TK’s chiseled physique was on display, skin dazzling as fading sunlight turned water droplets into diamonds, and TK’s sunglasses rested low on his nose as he smiled to the side where Carlos was. Was. As in not anymore. Only his arm, slung around his boyfriend’s shoulder, remained. Saved by being impossible to crop out. “Well?” Carlos asks again.

TK sighs, “Oh, I must have sent that by mistake.”

“You wanted to send me something else?”

“No,” TK clarifies, “I sent that to you by mistake. It was supposed to go to Buck, see?” TK shows Carlos his message thread, with the picture he sent Carlos, timestamped, showing he forwarded it to Buck first, then Carlos.

“…Buck.”

“Yeah, Buck,” TK continues, leaving his texts and diving into his photo album. He selects a group shot of the 126, plus a few extra members. He zooms closer on one face, Buck’s, enough that Carlos can distinguish the two birthmark spots above his eyebrows. “I’m sure I told you about him.”

“You did,” Carlos nods. He tears his gaze from Buck’s smile, fuming. “The firefighter who flirted with you.”

“I mean, he also helped me save my dad,” TK says, “but, yeah… he also flirted with me.” TK lowers his phone, chuckling, “We’ve just been chatting back and forth – as friends do – when I realized… y’know, I told him I wasn’t interested, because I had this really awesome boyfriend who I love, but since that’s not the case anymore, we’re only friends apparetly, I figured I might as well shoot my shot. Find out if he’s still interested. Maybe once quarantine is done, I can take some time off and… see what Los Angeles has to offer.” The eyebrow wiggle was completely unnecessary. TK communicated exactly what of Los Angeles he intends to see, regardless of how his eyebrows moved.

He’s better than this. Carlos knows what TK is doing. What the picture, and its delivery, was supposed to accomplish. What it’s succeeding at. He can win this, simply by ignoring TK’s teasing.

Except.

“You are not going to Los Angeles.” Carlos scowls, “Not without me. And especially not if Buck is gonna be there.”

TK scoffs, “What are you, my boyfriend?”

“…Yes!”

“Says who?” he asks, “Your parents?”

They’re outside. In public, surrounded by people who keep their distance. Unfortunately, their voices carry wide enough they draw a sizeable crowd. Carlos doesn’t notice until TK storms off and leaves him with the blanket, the abandoned food, and their audience.

Carlos blushes, hiding behind his hands. He wishes he never fumbled back then, in the farmer’s market. He also, briefly, wishes he and Buck switched places. At least then TK would be treating him to risqué pictures. At least Carlos would be having a good time, if he were Buck. He’d be receiving sexy photos from a certified dreamboat instead of suffering because of his own mistakes.

---------------------------

Buck stumbles over his words, stuttering, rushing out his explanation to a stone-faced Eddie. “Seriously,” he says, “I don’t – I don’t know why TK sent me that picture of him! It’s not like I asked! One second we’re talking about movies and the next thing I know – shirtless TK!”

“Yeah, I know,” Eddie huffs, arms folded across his chest, “I saw.”

He shouldn’t have. If Buck hadn’t left his phone on the table to help Bobby in the kitchen. If he didn’t hear his phone beep with an arriving message, almost vibrating off the table from it. If Eddie, along with Hen and Chim, weren’t climbing the stairs at the moment, and if he ignored Buck’s plea to hand him his phone. To punch in the code – which he knew, of course Eddie knew – since Buck was wrist deep in a turkey’s hole.

Buck washed his hands immediately, drying them on his pants as he chased Eddie the few feet towards the couch.

“So,” Eddie continues, “you and TK…”

He and TK? “We’re friends,” he says, repeating himself after Eddie’s disbelieving stare. “Okay, I mean – he did turn me down once, when we were leaving Texas. But he said he had a boyfriend –“

“He turned you down?” Eddie asks, “You flirted with him?”

“No!” Buck shrugs, running his hand over his forehead, frowning at the sweat that pooled there. “Well, I didn’t think I was. But he did? And – and he left before I could say anything, but I didn’t think it mattered since he, y’know, had a boyfriend!” He stomps his foot, irritation bubbling from the pit of his stomach and out his mouth. “Besides! Why does it matter if he sends me pictures?” Nice pictures. Distracting pictures that made Buck question exactly why TK misunderstanding his friendliness was a problem. “Why are you so angry?”

“Because… because…” Eddie looks past Buck, at the peanut gallery assembled by the kitchen. Hen and Chimney watching with interest while Bobby pretends cooking a turkey involves his whole focus. None of the seem keen to jump in and help. “Because… you…” Suddenly, Eddie stands. Buck recoils, stepping backwards. “You know what,” Eddie says, digging into his pocket, “I’m telling Marjan to unfollow you on Instagram.”

“What?”

“And!” he yells, phone free and on, “I’m telling her to block you!”

“What? No – Eddie, no! Don’t!” Buck follows his friend, pleading, “C’mon, she hasn’t even liked any of my photos yet… Eddie… Eddie!”

Eddie ignores him, furiously typing the end of Buck’s most famous connection online. In his haste, Buck forgets his phone on the counter. Eddie takes precedence over his phone.

Later, Buck will return to it. He will respond to TK’s picture, sending a tidal wave of texts at the Texan firefighter ranging between the immense trouble that picture landed him in and how TK can repay him by convincing Marjan to follow him again.

But that’s later. Now Buck slams his fist against the firetruck, yelling for Eddie to unlock the door.

Eddie doesn’t.

#911 on fox #911 lone star #carlos reyes #tk strand #evan 'buck' buckley #eddie diaz #tarlos #buddie #tarlos fanfic #buddie fanfic

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prettywordsyouleft · 4 years

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An Opportunity

Prompt: #62 for @emi-ten-wayv – “There was never an us.”

emi-ten-wayv said:

Of course!! I've followed you for a long while and then I think I accidentally unfollowed you by mistake (and didn't realize it 🤦). I am willing to wait as long as it takes. I understand writing takes awhile (I'm a writer too!). If you can, I would love a YouxIdol for Ten of NCT, for prompt 62 (I believe it's the one "there never was an us.") I can choose someone else too if you don't write for NCT. Thank you so much 🧡🧡

Pairing: Chittaphon (Ten) x reader

Genre: university au / angst / fluff

Warnings: none

Word count: 1260

To protect yourself, you had stopped listening to the speech the man before was still giving. Enough had already been said and you were waiting for your body to react, so you could leave this mortifying situation behind in haste.

Your feet, however, were rooted to the spot, your head lowered and you tried to stem the flow of your rising emotions. They were certain to spill over before your feet moved and you were desperate not to give him any further gratification of undermining you and your foolish beliefs.

“There was never an us, Y/N. Did you seriously think I’d find something worthy to like within you?”

You hadn’t expected such a reaction when handing over the concert tickets you had managed to score yesterday, knowing how badly Luka wanted to go. You thought you were doing something kind by sourcing them, and as your eyes remained downcast, you watched as he gripped onto them still, as if he deserved to keep them. You knew you couldn’t be petty and take them back, even if you had every right to do just that.

He didn’t deserve you or the efforts you had spent on him over the last few months.

Of course, there was some part of you that was just as berating as his harsh words were. You had been foolish to think the attention Luka gave you came from a genuine heart. Now, with him spewing out how horrible to be seen with you off campus grounds would be, you wished you could laugh hollowly at yourself out loud. You clearly had a poor eye for things, and jumped to one too many conclusions in his company during classes. He was simply mooching off your adept skills to take in what he couldn’t be bothered to in the lectures, falling for one too many of his smiles.

You hated that you came to realise just what a foul human being he was it from this embarrassingly public degradation of your personality.

Still, you weren’t exactly standing up for yourself any, too ashamed that your heart had fluttered upon the mere sight of him just moments before he started up this attack.

“And so, that is why I can’t believe you had the audacity to-”

“Listening to you openly treat a woman like this has fried some of my brain cells,” a new voice stated tiredly, and you suddenly had the energy to snap your head up, your mouth falling ajar when you found a classmate standing between you and Luka. Chittaphon glanced in your direction and then snatched the concert tickets away from Luka’s hand, giving them back to you. “These belong to you, right?”

“Why are you butting in? This is between Y/N and me-”

“If that was the case, you’d take it somewhere private,” Chittaphon countered, gesturing to the people surrounding you in the hallway. You ducked your head back down, your cheeks flaring as your eyes started to water dangerously, now blinking rapidly, hoping that would push the tears back. You flinched when Chittaphon placed an arm around you, smiling at you encouragingly. “Why are you hiding? What did you do so wrong to receive such an earful? Keep your head up, you deserve better than this asshole.”

“Watch what you’re saying!”

“Why? So you can feel victorious for making someone who had genuine feelings about you feel like a lesser human? Why should you get all the glory? You’re nothing more than an egotistical bully.”

Luka pointed in your direction, evidently flustered. Your tears retreated; the comfort Chittaphon was lending you fuelled your confidence. He nodded at you, silently praising you for maintaining your eye contact with him. It made Luka frustrated, darting his attention around the gathering now piqued by the addition of Chittaphon to it. “Now, you listen here, this has nothing to do with you.”

“You’re right, and now, Y/N has nothing to do with you either. Shall we go get some dinner, Y/N? Off campus too? Because I have no qualms in being seen anywhere with you.”

You still didn’t trust yourself to speak, though you did manage a firm nod in agreement, allowing Chittaphon to lead you away from the scene. Once you were both out of sight, he let you go and raised a hand to his chest, inhaling deeply. “Wow, I never expected to be that strong in a situation like that. Are you okay?”

Nodding again, you let out a shaky breath, not realising you had been holding it for as long as you had. Your chest ached and you thumped at it, which sprung tears to your eyes.

Chittaphon cringed. “Oh, don’t cry! You did so well not to in front of that jerk.”

“I… I stopped breathing so it hurts now that I am.”

Eying you carefully, he then let out a hearty laugh, gesturing towards the car park. “I was serious about dinner, shall we?”

“Are you-”

“It’s a yes or no question, Y/N.”

Smiling gently, you nodded. “That would be great, thank you.”

Once seated in a small eatery near campus, you smiled more warmly at Chittaphon as he returned with a tray of food. “I could have paid for us both to say thank you for stepping in to help me.”

Chittaphon waved you off. “It irked me no one stepped in before I had. I only saw some of it and that was enough. I don’t know how you stood there taking in his disgusting words.”

“I must’ve looked so pathetic to you,” you breathed and lowered your head out of habit, blinking suddenly when you felt Chittaphon’s fingers hook under your chin, lifting your view back up. He grinned at you when you looked at him again.

“You’re not pathetic for liking someone. Okay, so I don’t get what you saw in him, but we all end up falling for people who aren’t suitable. Don’t get so hung up on it, you dodged a bullet in a way.”

“You’re right,” you agreed with a smile and Chittaphon nodded encouragingly again. “I can’t believe how much money I spent on these tickets just because I felt confident that he liked me though. I wish I could rip them up, but, I think that would make me more miserable.”

“I have a better idea,” Chittaphon mentioned and you tilted your head to listen. “Let’s go together.”

“Oh, I couldn’t impose on you-”

“I offered. It’s not imposing at all.”

You smiled with ease, Chittaphon was really straight-forward and you could tell by the look in his eyes that he meant what he said.

It was funny; you had maybe spoken all of five words to Chittaphon in the past. And now you were comfortably eating a meal with him and even making plans for tomorrow.

“Should we?” you asked, gauging his reaction. “I mean, it would be a waste and I don’t know anyone else who would like to go with me.”

“It sounds like a date,” Chittaphon replied and your eyes widened. He laughed. “What’s so wrong with that?”

“Do you like me?”

“Not yet,” he responded with ease and you scrutinised him for a moment. Flicking his attention back to you, he smiled. “But I could if you give me a chance.”

“I don’t want a pity date.”

“I don’t pity you though.”

“Then?”

“We’re two humans presented with an opportunity to get to know each other more. Do you want to accept it or throw it away?”

You smiled slowly. “I’m accepting.”

“I was hoping you would.”

_________________

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deepdaleducks · 5 years

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Slow Burn - Dele

Author’s Note So I got the idea for this based on a conversation @forza-atleti and I had this morning so I kinda had to write it asap. Idk if I have much else to say, I have some ideas for a second part of this so if you want more, let me know. I didn’t proof read any of it so if you see any mistakes, point them out nicely. I love getting feedback from you guys and I’m really enjoying writing at the moment so thanks for enjoying reading it!! Love you all x

“Hey erm, I kinda have to bail on tonight. I know we said we’d stay home and watch movies but, err, something’s come up and I can’t anymore. I’ll defo see you Sunday though, yeah? I’m sorry and erm have a good weekend.” You’d listened to the voicemail he’d left on your phone what felt like a million times. You knew exactly what the something that had come up was. Or who it was for that matter. His ex-girlfriend, Ruby. They’d broken up about a month ago, but it had been long and drawn out. He would still call her at night and sometimes she’d go to his place. And in the mornings, he would be at your front door, regret on his face, ranting about how he just can’t seem to leave her. How unfollowing her on Instagram didn’t seem to work because his car still knew the exact route to her house, even if he wasn’t planning to drive there. How he’d memorised her number, so deleting it was no good. How she was his biggest weakness. You would make him a cup of tea and some toast and tell him that with time and distance things will heal. That moving on to other people will help him get over her. How spending time with other people would distract him from thinking about going to her house.

That’s how your Valentine’s Day plans had come about. No boyfriends or girlfriends, no exes or drunk dials, just the two of you, friends, together with a movie and a take away pizza. It wasn’t going to be a date, and you weren’t going to tell him. Not that it didn’t hurt when you got his message. Not that it didn’t break your heart a little when you realised that he was choosing her over you. So instead of pizza and movies, its wine and Grey’s Anatomy. And if he shows up tomorrow, its ‘I’m late for work’. But from the look of her Instagram story, a fancy restaurant in the city, he won’t be showing up in the morning anyway.

Your phone buzzes with a text, pulling you from your third episode of the night.

Chlo: Soooooo, how’s your night going?? If you don’t reply I know what you’re up to😉😉 get it girl!!!

When you’d told her about your plans for Valentine’s Day she’s shrieked in excitement. She had been begging you to reveal your true feelings to Dele for weeks and when she found out about his break up, she’d called you immediately saying that this was your chance. You’d insisted that this wasn’t your chance and that if you told him now, you’d just be a rebound and everything would fall apart. Instead you went for the option of being a shoulder to cry on and letting your friendship grow. You typed in a quick reply before turning back to the tv.

Me: He bailed. Back with her, I guess.

Her reply comes through almost instantly. You pause the tv and head into the kitchen to fill your wine, figuring that if you were gonna be texting for a while you may as well get another glass.

Chlo: Oh babe.

Chlo: ….

Before she has the chance to type any more, you change the subject quickly.

Me: It’s fine. How was your night with Jesse? His leg doing okay?

The two of you had become friends at the World Cup last summer. You’d bonded in the family and friend’s area of the stands over being two of the most outraged people there. You were both yelling over the referee’s poor decision. Somehow that led to you talking and becoming friends. When you’d introduced yourself as Dele’s friend, she’d quickly joked about how she thought Dele had gotten a new girlfriend, and you could tell she’d regretted it. “She doesn’t like me, either” You’d replied, and her face was flooded with relief. Since then, you were constantly texting, meeting up in each other’s city, watching the boys at games.

Chlo: Oi oi, don’t try to change the subject. We’re just having the night in, Jess is fine. Are you okay though?

Her text flashes up and then seconds later a call is coming through. You answer, sipping on your wine before talking.

“Chlo, I’m fine honestly. It’s Valentine’s Day, of course he’s gonna go back to her, I don’t know why we didn’t see it coming.” You say before she can even begin to rant about how shitty his actions were.

“Nah, that was a shitty thing for him to do. Imma be having words, swear down.” You hear Jesse’s voice echo in, realising you were on speaker phone, you chime in a ‘hey Jess’. You laugh at his threats.

“Yeah, babe, everyone and their grandma’s cat knows that she treats him badly. I don’t get why he can’t see that.” Chloe sighs. The three of you were biased for sure, with neither of you being her biggest fan, but it wasn’t hard to deny that she did treat him badly. And you would treat him so much better.

“There’s not much I can do about it though, is there? Like hey Del, break up with your girlfriend I love you more than she ever could. He’s not exactly going to fall into my arms. He’s wrapped around her finger, for fuck’s sake.” You reply, trying to push down any feelings for him that were rising in your heart.

“What are you doing this weekend? You wanna come up and stay with us?” She asks impulsively. Despite your usual plans to see Dele on Sunday, you agree, planning to make the drive up tomorrow after work. “I know your heart is hurting right now, babe, but he’ll see the light eventually. We’ll make sure of it.” She finishes.

“Hell yeah, we will!” Jesse yells from the background. With that you hang up and head upstairs to pack a small bag for your impromptu weekend away.

When you get out of work on Friday night, you immediately get in the car and begin the four hour drive up to Manchester. The traffic delays don’t phase you, the promise of a warm home cooked meal keeping you on. Your car pulls into the drive of your friend’s house, the warm lights from inside welcoming you. Inside you find Chloe and Jesse, taking your bag and coat.

“Surprise!” a familiar voice yells, emerging from the living room. You turn to see Marcus walking over to you with his arms open to hug you. “Been way too long, chuck,” he says, squeezing you tightly.

“Yeah sorry, I couldn’t come to see you at Fulham the other week. Work’s been so busy recently.” You respond pulling away. “Alright, not to be rude, but I’m starving so where’s the food?”

The four of you head into the dining room, engorging on a meal prepared by Chloe. Jesse claims to have helped with the cooking but you and Marcus both return with jokes about how Jesse has absolutely no cooking ability whatsoever and that the boy couldn’t even chop a carrot if he tried.

The night passes by with ease, as you share jokes and stories. Marcus talks about the girl he’s been seeing, and Jesse teases that she’s so out of Marcus’ league. The boys tell stories from training and talk about how rough its going to be now Jesse is injured. And Dele doesn’t cross your mind once. No thought about how she was probably in his bed right now. About how things should be different.

In the morning, Chloe takes you to brunch and then you head out for some retail therapy. She forces you to buy a new black dress, claiming that you should find a date for next weekend and wear the dress to knock the socks of your suitor.

“You now I’ve tried dating other people, Chlo. I have. Do you not remember Jake? Or Ben? Or that guy I went out with like a month ago!” You protest. Dating other people hadn’t been successful albeit. Every time you found something that felt that it could work, Dele would show up at your door in the night, eyes puffy from crying, voice hoarse from yelling, and you would let him in again. He would fall into your bed, and you’d hold his hands whilst he slept. He would tell you that he was never going to find anyone else like you. And then he would leave in the morning and go back to her. Like clockwork.

“Yeah but Jake was the opposite of everything you want so that was never gonna work, and Ben was a dickhead anyway. Besides, if Del sees you dating someone else it might make him a little jealous. Remind him that he’s not the only guy in your life, yeah?” She gives you a look that says I’m right and you best believe me, so you slowly nod your head in response, convincing yourself that her plan is good one.

She’s called into work in the afternoon and you’re left at home with Jesse, who’s still resting from his injury. You flick through Sky Movies together trying to find a film that suits both of your tastes. You want romcom and he wants action which leads to the two of you bickering like siblings over the remote. Pausing as you flick past The Proposal, you turn to look at him.

“I noticed you still didn’t put a ring on Chloe’s finger this Valentine’s then.” You tease, eying his response carefully. They’d been together for a while and you and Marcus had made bets on when they’d get engaged before Christmas, with him thinking it would be in the summer and you insisting it had to happen soon.

“Nah, nah, Valentine’s proposals are cringing as fuck man. That’s so typical. I don’t want her to be expecting it, so I’m skipping Christmas, Valentine’s, her birthday, our anniversary, none of that.” He defends himself, shaking his head.

“Christ, Jess. At this rate I’m gonna be getting married before you and I’m in love with a guy who is constantly going back to his ex.” You joke, the words stinging a little as you say them.

“It’ll happen soon, I swear. Maybe next month, who knows? March is nothing important, right?” He pauses to look you over, “Do you, though? Love him?” His question puts you on edge. No one had ever asked you that before. Sure, Chloe had teased you about your crush and about the fact you liked him. But the word love had never come up. Especially not in this content. Your mind spins as you think, but quickly enough, you have one clear thought.

“How could I not?” You ask, like it’s the easiest thing in the world.

It’s 9pm before you finally hear from him. You never replied to his voicemail on Thursday and since then the two of you hadn’t interacted.

Del: We still on for brunch tomorrow morning? I’ll pick you up at 10 x

Me: In Manchester so I can’t.

Your reply is blunt, but worthy. He bailed on you, so you’re bailing on him. As much as he could have you like butter in his hands, you wanted to show a little distance. The distance crumbles when his face flashes on your screen displaying an incoming call and you answer immediately.

“What the fuck are you doing in Manchester?” He asks with a tone of anger in his voice. “Were you just not planning to tell me you were cancelling on our weekly brunch?”

You scoff in response, “That’s a little rich coming from you right now, Dele. Chloe and Jesse called me on Thursday night and invited me up for the weekend, so I happily accepted.” Throwing in the detail that they invited you on Thursday was done to spite him. You were supposed to see him on Thursday, and hopefully him realising that you had other offers would hurt a little.

“Oh right,” he mutters in response. “I guess we’ll have to do it another time then.”

“Yeah maybe…” You trail off, “Look, I gotta go. I, erm, I’ll see you when I’m back sometime.” Hanging up the phone you leave it in the kitchen, heading back into the living room to watch more tv with your friends. When you retire up to bed you leave your phone downstairs, happy to not be distracted by any social media or messages. Your phone sits on the kitchen counter, 10 unread text messages and 3 missed calls unnoticed on the screen.

You’re sound asleep when you hear a banging on the door downstairs, followed by three more rings of the doorbell. You slowly pull yourself from the comfort of your bed and throw your dressing gown on, heading out in to the hall to see what’s causing all the noise. Jesse emerges from the master throwing a t-shirt on.

“You stay here, I’ll go see what it is.” He says sleepily. Waiting at the top of the staircase, you hear him open the door and mumble a “what are you doing here, it’s the middle of the night”. Straining your ears, you try to make out the other voice. It sounds familiar and the pieces of conversation you hear help you to piece it all together.

“I need to speak to her…”

“Look bro, it’s the middle of the night.”

“No but I need to see her.”

“I don’t know if she wants to see you… Come back tomorrow maybe, man.”

“I need to tell her it’s over.”

The last thing you hear sends you down the stairs tentatively. He stands there in the entrance hall, joggers and a t-shirt, bags under his eyes, presumably from driving all night, hair a mess, eyes pleading. Jesse looks between you and notices his que to leave, heading upstairs with a whispered shout if you need me.

“It’s over?” You ask, not stepping any further in his direction. He nods weakly in reply. You feel like you’re having déjà vu, flashing back to this exact situation a few weeks ago. You remember him crying, saying those same words. Then you remember him going back to her, and again and again. A bitter taste appears on your tongue and you feel a sudden urge to get a glass of water.

“Good for you,” you mutter, walking straight past him towards the kitchen. He follows you instantly, keeping his distance on the other side of the room.

“Good for me?” He hisses quietly, careful not to make any noise. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“It means I don’t think you’re telling the truth.” You huff, looking at him tiredly. “It means that I’ve been down this road so many times with you recently, Del, that I’m just bored of it.”

“No, I’m serious. It’s over.” He pleads with you, moving closer. You don’t respond and a silence settles between the two of you for a minute. You stare out the window into the garden and he stands behind you at a distance, facing in the same way. He eyes your reflection in the mirror and your eyes meet. “You know how I know it’s over? Friday morning, we wake up and we agree to go to dinner in the evening, right. And she calls me later saying, she’s invited to some club event and she’s gonna have to skip the dinner, am I arsed about it? No, not really. But then yesterday, hearing that you’re not coming to brunch and that you’re all the way up in Manchester and I had no idea. That broke my heart. Because I pushed you out of my life, and I don’t ever want you to not be a part of my life.” When he pauses to breath you turn around to look at him, leaning back against the counter. “I’ve been pushing you away to be with her and she’s not worth me losing you.”

Everything he’s saying sounds sweet. Perfect, in fact. But he’s still not saying the one thing you want to hear. He’s not saying he loves you, that he’s in love with you. And right now, as much as you want his attention, every second of his time isn’t worth it if he doesn’t love you back. The pain of him being your friend, but not yours, would be too much.

“Okay, well. I, um.” You stutter, lost for words. “I don’t think I can be your friend right now because…” The words are right there on your lips. Because I’m in love with you. You drop your eyes to the floor and attempt to move past him, out from where he’s trapped you in the corner of the kitchen.

“Because what? Because you’re in love with me?” His words echo your thoughts.

His words stop you in your tracks. “How do you know that?” you ask, not turning back to look at him.

“She pointed it out. Ruby. She’s the one who noticed it.” He stops for a minute, hoping you’ll lift your head, or turn around in interested. “She said she could tell by the way you looked at me, or the way your face would light up whenever you talked about me. It’s, uh, why we broke up actually. She was constantly scared I was gonna leave her for you, and I could never see it and thought she was just being jealous.”

If what he was saying was true, and he knew that you were in love with him, why was he constantly falling back into her bed. Why was he still putting her above you in his list of priorities?

“So, what? You know I’m in love with you, you break up with your girlfriend over it, cry on my shoulder and then still go back to sleep with her? None of that adds up, Dele. I don’t know what you’re doing, but whatever it is, it’s fucked up.”

He falters whilst processing your words. “I thought it wasn’t true. You never said you were in love with me and I didn’t wanna just spring it on you and ruin everything. I don’t know what I was doing, okay?” He says louder in frustration, throwing his hands in the air. “I’ve been in love with you since the day we met. But you were dating some guy, and she came along, and I just told myself to forget it. Then she goes and makes statements like that and it messes with my head.”

“You’re in love with me?” You ask, the new realisation sending excitement through your veins. Eyes finally meeting his for the first time in minutes.

“I am so fucking in love with you.” He grins cheekily. Hearing those words come out of his mouth dissipates every negative emotion that you’d been harbouring in the last few weeks. You feel the immediate pull of his gravity, drawing you across the kitchen into his arms. His lips crash against yours in an instant, lighting your entire body on fire. Its urgent and fierce and screams we’ve waited years to do this. When you part for breath, he rests his forehead against yours, and your eyes flutter open to meet his.

“What does this mean?” You ask, hesitantly.

“It means that we’re gonna go upstairs and sleep. Then tomorrow, we’re gonna wake up and I’m gonna take you on a date to get breakfast. And then I’m going to pay to get your car sent back to London, because in the afternoon I’m gonna drive you home.” He gives you another short sweet peck.

Your fingers find his and you drag him upstairs to the spare bedroom you’d been staying in. You fall into bed together, not for the first time, but when he reaches out for your hand like always, this time he uses it to pull you closer to him, and you know that tomorrow, he won’t be leaving.

READ PART TWO HERE

#footballer imagine #dele #dele alli #jesse lingard #marcus rashford #writing #idk what else to hashtag #slow burn

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eurosong · 5 years

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2018 vs 2019: Semi-final 1

Hey there, folks! Every year after the national final season is over, one of the first things I write about Eurovision is a comparison of the new year’s songs with those of the previous year. Often it gets folk unfollowing the blog even though it’s almost entirely posts about ESC statistics and only a relatively small amount on rating the songs here. These are just my thoughts and no offence intended to anyone who thinks otherwise. Without further ado, click below to take a look at my thoughts on semi-final one!

◯ Australia – 2019 – Last year, Oz sent “We got love” (or “We got l’œuf” as I renamed it), which was a dizzying collection of clichés, got a mediocre placement and might well have been the impetus for them finally biting the bullet and getting the punters involved in the thitherto long mooted national final. This decision might not benefit their chances of keeping up their qualification record in the long run – but it means, for once, that Australia can move outside a narrow box musically and send things that would never be picked by internal selectors. “Zero gravity” was a less astute choice than “2000 & Whatever” would have been, I feel – it sounds to be like something that people think is so Eurovision who haven’t seen it in some time. Nonetheless, homegirl has pipes, the tune is quite catchy and it’s a hell of a lot more interesting than last year’s song.

◯ Belarus – 2018 – whilst I’ll be talking about 2018 vs 2019, I have to take a quick detour almost right away to 2017. It was the first time that Belarus managed to sustain my interest and get into my personal top 10 since their début, and they did so by going authentic and finally showing some love for their national language on the ESC stage. One year later, and I certainly wasn’t enthused by a carpetbagging victory of a non-local singing a rather ordinary song in English or some approximation thereof.

And yet, “Forever” and its earnest performer grew on me, especially the strange dissonance between the hopeful lyrics and the very melancholy music. After a similar number of repeated listens, “Like it” has not sparked even the briefest flame. Musically, this starts off with an inoffensive if very 2005 Spanish guitar riff, arrives at a decent-ish bridge and then throws itself off it head first into an absolutely dreadful thumping, repetitive chorus which is reprised way too much in the rest of the song. Lyrically, they put about as much effort into the words as they did into the “screensaver with default font” they were using as a background as Zena performed. She repeats “yes, you’re gunna like it” 40 times in the space of 3 minutes – one every 4.5 seconds. Maybe she’s trying to psychologically condition us, but no, Zena, I ent gunna like it at all. In a delicious bit of irony, it’s also at time of writing the least “liked” ESC ’19 song on Youtube. Strong preference to 2018.

◯ Belgium – 2019 – It can be difficult for a country to come back after a peak moment for them with something equally good that also manages to win over the fans and juries. We’ve seen it in Latvia after “Love injected”, in Estonia after “Goodbye to yesterday” and I think we’re seeing it once again with Belgium after “City lights”. Neither this year’s song nor last’s comes anywhere near the anthemic, emotional power of Blanche’s song. Both are nice enough, but I wouldn’t be surprised if Eliot struggled much as Sennek did last year. I give it a slight preference, but both songs are really let down, I feel, by choruses that don’t pay off the drama built in the verses.

◯ Cyprus – Neither – I try to limit myself to as few “neither” choices as possible in these games because the fun is in having to choose, sometimes, between two difficult options. Nonetheless, I abhorred “Fuego” in every conceivable way and this aptly-named “replay” offers little different to those who weren’t fans of it. If I had to pick, I’d go with 2018, because at least it doesn’t have the sadness of attempting to catch lightning twice in the same jar attached to it.

◯ Czechia – 2019 – Two years, two rather uncomfortable entries from the Czechs in a row. Last year, we had a predatory “Blurred lines” light, while this year, whilst less lyrically degrading, still has weird lines about eavesdropping on people having sex through the walls(?)… but it’s enough to secure a slight preference.

◯ Estonia – 2018 – It seems like such a long time has passed since the days when I consistently found Eesti Beesti, since those days when Eesti Laul seemed experimental and had a decent number of songs in their native language. I’m no fan of popera, but at least Elina was a local talent. It’s bewildering when a country with so many great artists can’t find someone with any real association with it to sing for them. Though both are ultimately derivative, I prefer La forza to what is essentially an aviici b-side.

◯ Finland– 2018 – I have a pet peeve for national finals where you are presented with a single choice of artist. Unless said artist is very versatile (say, Frances Ruffelle, who took on dark pop, ballads and gospel-tinged anthems in her solo national final back in 1994), you are restricted to a narrow set of genres. If you don’t like that artist or their style, then you’re shit out of luck. That’s been the case for the last few years with Saara Aalto and now Darude. I didn’t really like ány of either’s songs and miss the days of a diverse choice in UMK. I pick Saara because her throwback was slightly more tolerable.

◯ Georgia– 2018 – Fair play to Georgia, who always dance to the beat of their very own peculiar drummer. You’d think that the shift to the X Factor format to pick their representative, combined with the cold reception for their “ethno-jazz” last year, would have led to them playing it safe to try to avoid three DNQs in a row. Instead they’ve gone for something downbeat, angry and almost oppressive in its ambiance, i.e. something even less accessible to the general viewer than last year. This feels like the rock song equivalent to a war crimes tribunal. I preferred last year’s effort, which was rather more uplifting, and which I felt was unfairly underrated for a genuinely well-composed piece of music steeped in tradition.

◯ Greece – 2019 – A number of people around me were raving for Oneiro mou last year. I wasn’t one of them and suspected it would fail to qualify from the get-go. Instead of “Greece returning to form”, it felt like them attempting to do so but ending up with a nationalistic pastiche instead. This year, they’ve taken their usual mould and smashed it with a hammer, going in a very different direction with a delightfully husky-voiced singer and a musically anthemic piece that manages to compensate, for me, the song’s lyrical shortcomings. I enjoy it a fair bit more.

◯ Hungary – 2018 – This is one of the hardest ones of this semi final to choose, as “Viszlát nyar” and “Az én apam” are chalk and cheese, but both highly qualitative and with meaningful lyrics. Joci’s other ESC song, Origo, beat Viszlát nyar for me, but his 2019 effort doesn’t have quite the same visceral punch to it, so I think I’m going to have to give the edge to AWS this time around.

◯ Iceland – 2019 – Another country giving us night and day, but this time, I like neither of the two choices. Last year certainly put the “cheese” in the old “chalk and cheese” saying, an unbelievably overwrought and soppy Christmas charity-esque tune that somehow ended up at ESC. This year, it’s something rather acerbic, dingy, grating and ultimately gimmicky. In these times, “hate will prevail” is the last message we need. I will take it over Ari any day though, as that was just squirmworthy.

◯ Montenegro – 2018 – It seemed that, last year, Montenegro was back to doing what it has always done best – a haunting, beautiful Balkan ballad after a few bizarre years of experiments gone wrong. Unfortunately, Inje got slept on despite its quality and couldn’t bring about an end to CG’s DNQ streak. There were many candidates in this year’s Montevizija that could have gone one better and done just that – but instead, bewilderingly, we got this unspeakable jumble which sounds like it was a rejected b-side for a mediocre mid-90s boy band, but with the addition of Random Casio Noises® in the background. Comparing Inje to it is likening fine wine to a bottle of Panda Cola that has been left with the cap off in the sun for 2 weeks.

◯ Poland – 2019 – Last year, Poland sent a middle-aged man in a hat doing a cringey snake dance whilst a young, inexplicably Swedish guy sort of sang and the whole thing sounded like the soundtrack for a Coke advert gone wrong. This year, they’ve got some women swaying like maniacs in a forest where they probably buried their patriarch. Not much of a step up in theory, but a big step up nonetheless…

◯ Portugal– 2019 – Portugal is a country that could have peaked with their first win, or fallen into a niche in a sad attempt (*cough* Cyprus *cough*) to recapture that glory. Instead, they are challenging all the tropes and have a national final with some serious diversity. I loved “O jardim” and it deserved way better, but this year’s song, “Telemóveis”, exceeds even that. It’s a haunting but catchy as hell rumination on mortality, technology and saudade with a musical backdrop whose influences transcend continents. If it’s not in the running to win the whole thing, I will be disappointed.

◯ San Marino – 2018 – I cannot get my head around the enthusiasm for “Say na na na”, which seems to have been contracted not only by postmodern pisstakers but by many folk who genuinely like it. It makes me cringe 10x more than Jenny B’s not quite sick rap skills last year, and that’s saying something. Plus, they had robots.

◯ Serbia – 2019 – They seemed like really nice people, but I found last year’s Serbian entry itself to be a bit of a minestrone into which a dozen elements of other songs were chucked in, and thus was lacking a bit in coherence. “Kruna”, on the other hand, is perfectly-formed, poignant, beautifully orchestrated and one of the best Balkan ballads in the past few years.

◯ Slovenia – 2018 – Fair play to Slovenia for picking themselves up and dusting themselves off after a few rough years. Hvala ne was backed by almost no one to qualify but I had faith in it early on and Lea benefited from being able to make a real connection with the crowds. Sebi is a very different beast entirely. Whilst Hvala ne had a defiance and a frenetic energy, Sebi is contemplative and melancholy. Both have great lyrics, too. I am going with Slovenia at the minute as it’s stood the test of time, but really the better of the two songs is really a question of mood.

And the automatic qualifiers of this semi-final:

◯ France – 2018 – It’s a battle between two songs written by the same writers, and since I loved their 2018 work, their follow-up should have a chance of making this a closely-run thing. Shóúld. Instead, they went from writing an understated song about humanity to writing an overbearingly pompous and self-important song about ego. This is the worst French song to me since 1988.

◯ Israel – 2018 – I wonder if Israel’s broadcasters remember how their predecessor, the IBU, won on home soil in 1979. I have the feeling they might well do, and as a result ensured it wouldn’t happen again with this song. There are elements of the song I really like, but it’s let down for me by a snivelly, exaggerated voice and a rather self-indulgent chorus. I was no great fan of “Toy”, but can listen to it with more pleasure than this.

◯ Spain – 2018 – I remember when “Tu canción" came out and I was completely in love with it. The unfortunate thing about songs sung by starry-eyed young loves is that their relationships often end up star-crossed. Now, Almaia is no more, and the song has a hugely bitter aftertaste. Nonetheless, I prefer it to La venda, which is a rather empty song lyrically but which I still found the best of a bad lot in the Spanish national final.

Coming up in the next instalment, my thoughts on SF2’s songs and how they shape up to those from last year!

#eurovision #esc 2019 #opinion #esc #eurovision 2019 #eurovision song contest

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jojismile · 6 years

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i still love him

angst

trigger warning: cursing?

prompt: a year after joji and you ended your relationship

masterlist

picture this;

You didn’t want to end up like this. You always imagined a better life for yourself. A life with him. But you two were going in different directions. You never had any time for each other. So you two mutually decided to split, well that’s what Joji thought. But that was a year ago when you started your surgical internship and he officially began his music career. You both were supportive of each other, you always had been. You dated for two years before the split. And those were the best two years of your life.

You stroll down the aisle of Japanese Mart in Soho. You used to go there with Joji all the time. But this time it felt different. You brushed off the feeling as you browsed the aisles. You grabbed a few cups of ramen. Your internship was hard and you didn’t have a lot of time to cook for yourself. You remember how Joji used to cook for you. You shake your head. There was no point in remembering the past.

You went to the snack aisle. You grabbed two boxes of your favorite pocky, some gummies, two bags of ramune candy, and a bag of green tea kit kats. You kept looking at other products. You kept walking and you make your way to the beauty products. With help from someone who works there, you grab a few facemasks. You decided to go through the aisles once again, just for the sake of being thorough.

There you see a face you thought you wouldn’t see. Not for a while longer. You do a 180 and walked in the other direction. Thoughts filled your mind. You hoped that he didn’t notice you. You hadn’t thought about seeing him. For the first few weeks after your break up you two would still talk. Friendly, light-hearted conversations almost every day. After three months you unfollowed him on twitter and instagram, he returned the favor. You rarely checked facebook anymore but that was the one place where you didn't unfollow him.

“Y/N?” He called out. You took a deep breath and turned around from the shelf that you were just staring at, while you were lost in your thoughts. You plastered a fake smile as you greeted him. “Hey, Joji. H-how are you?” You sound monotone and you cringe internally.

He looks more tired. You’re inclined to ask him about it but completely dismiss the thought. You have an urge to ask if he misses you, or something along the lines of that. “I’m doing pretty good. What about you?” “Exhausted but it’s whatever.” You say still unsure of your current feelings. An uneasy silence fills the empty store.

Finally, you speak up, “I didn’t expect to see you today.” “Oh, well I was just grabbing a few things for tonight. I didn’t expect to see you either. I thought you moved to Boston.” “I, uh, actually never took the job in Boston. I decided to stay here, but I love it here which is good.” Correction, you loved it here.

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. I know Boston was your top choice, but I’m glad that you’re happy.” You quickly change the subject, “So what about you? How are things?” His eyes light up a bit and it reminds you of how much he loved talking about his music which melts your heart a bit.

“Things are going really good. I went on tour with one of my friends for a bit, still working on music and stuff like that. It’s been pretty fucking amazing.” “That’s fantastic.” You say with a lump in your throat. This was so uncomfortable and you hated this. You hated the fact that you weren’t able to enjoy this with him. You wanted to tell him everything. You were putty in his hands and you were ready to explode.

“Do you still think about me?” These words escape your mouth and your eyes widen. You cannot believe you just spoke that and you hoped that it was just imagination. To your discontent, it wasn’t. “Wow, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean, I mean, fuck I’m so sorry.” You say trying to regain control of yourself.

He looks taken aback by your question. Of course, he does, why wouldn’t he be. You put your basket on the floor and bury your head in your hands. “Fuck I’m so sorry, I think I’m just sleep deprived.” You say trying to recuperate from whatever the hell you just did.

“No, it’s a valid question I think,” Joji says. “You don’t have to answer that George, I’m sorry.” “It’s fine, I mean I guess I do think about you sometimes. I mean you unfollowed me from twitter and insta so it hasn’t been exactly easy to communicate with you. And neither of us are active on facebook. I don’t have your number anymore.” Your heart breaks a little, he didn’t mention the breakup or anything after that. You still held onto the little bit of hope you had left.

You love him. “Yeah, sorry about that I just felt that I should keep my distance. And I have something to tell you.” Joji’s eyes widen, “You’re not going to say you had a kid right? And that I’m the dad.” You laugh a little bit.

“No, that would be cruel, awful. But no, that’s not it. It’s just that, when we both were talking that night, I wasn’t going to tell you that we should break up. I was going to surprise you and tell you that I was staying in New York, for us. And when you said that you wanted to break up I just froze. But it seemed like you really wanted it at the time and I couldn’t force you to stay with me or whatever.”

That has been harbored deep down in your heart, you felt like crying, and it made you feel better talking about it. But, Joji looked conflicted. He was unsure of what he wanted to say. “I know, I should’ve said this that day but it killed me thinking that you would be doing something for me.” You say sorrowfully.

“I broke up for us. I couldn’t stand the thought of losing you to distance Y/N. Our breakup killed me so much. I didn’t want to.”

You blink away the tears and try to speak but there are no words. Joji continues, “But there’s nothing we can really say or do. I’m in a relationship right now so this makes it really fucking awkward. And I’m sure you’re in a relationship as well.”

That was it. The final blow. He had really moved past it and yet you were still holding onto hope.

“I’m actually not in any relationship or have been in one for like a year. Not that it matters. Anyways I hope you’re happy.” You say that as you pick up your basket and go to the register to pay. After that, you return to your apartment. You open the door, set your things inside, step inside, shut the door behind you, sit down and start crying. The tears that you thought you could contain spilled. All those emotions couldn’t be hidden or stored away. You were a mess but, you still love him.

hi, i’m pretty sure this is the longest one i’ve written so far! so idk what y’all prefer reading cause im good with writing whateveR! anyways thank you for reading !!

#joji miller #joji #joji imagine #joji fanfiction #joji fanfic #george miller #gabi writes about joji #joji x reader #jojismile

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capturing-the-moon · 2 years

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It’s back ...

Hey folks, guess who’s back. If you forgot you were following me, I am sorry for the sudden reappearance and I would not blame you for unfollowing.

So where have I been? To be honest I just lost interest in Tumblr after the Anastasia Broadway fandom died off. I started to get back into doing live theater, I made new friends in real life, I moved on with my career, and then the pandemic happened.

So why am I back? I lost out on my dream job and had a good friend suddenly ignore me in a matter of weeks, not to mention that three dream musicals of mine - which contain at least 5 dream roles for me - were being performed in my city and I could not get cast in a single one (despite the fact that one of the directors told me I deserve bigger roles, then offered me in a seven-line speaking role and said they wished they could give me more). So depression has set in hard over the last two months and I am honestly running out of distractions.

So now I have returned to Tumblr in the hopes that it will provide some sort of distraction for me. I am probably horribly out of touch with current Tumblr culture so I’ll likely come across as very cringe.

Anyway ... hey, I’m home.

#personal #text

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wakraya · 7 years

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Jacksepticeye: *Plays Hiveswap and praises its art style, music and humor, visibly enjoys the story and the characters and praises it, shows perhaps a light interest in Homestuck itself*

Y’all: Omg LUL prepare for the exposure to ruin the Fandom, Undertale 2.0 here we goooooo.

VIZ Media: *Partners up with Hussie to bring Homestuck to a wider audience, with plans to deliver hard cover books for every Act, making a Homestuck.com website, and working with Hussie in future projects to deliver the Epilogue and more content*

Y’all: Wow I can’t believe Hussie is a sellout, this is so bad.

Stop it. Please stop it.

Joking about ‘fearing’ Homestuck content or ‘the ride never ending’ and it being hell was never funny and it never will be. We’re on the brink of actually having new people come into the Fandom, we have a good game, exposure thanks to Youtubers and Streamers playing Hiveswap, and promises for future content by a big company related to Manga and Anime.

And all you can talk about is how ‘bad’ this is?

If it was stupid Homestuck hate, I could get it. I really could. The Fandom had bad reputation back in the day, and it was extremely undeserved in my opinion, much like how Fandom hate is thrown around nowadays soooo easily. But I could get it, if someone hated Homestuck, being an asshole. But if you’re a fan of the content, why the FUCK are you trying to sabotage it?

To people outside of the Fandom it looks like people can’t stand Homestuck. To people in the Fandom it looks like you’re being an asshole. You don’t like Homestuck? Then don’t post about it. You like it? Then don’t act like an elitist asshole.

If you’re afraid of a bad side of the Fandom being rekindled, and all you can do is shove people away, insult possible newcomers and question actually good business decisions, then you know what? Congratulations! YOU ARE THE BAD SIDE OF THE FANDOM. No one is holding you hostage, to this Fandom, to any Fandom. You don’t want to see content? Blacklist it, don’t go into the tag, unfollow/block people. You WANT to see content? Then stop talking about it as if it was the End of the World every time there’s something going on.

Homestuck is something dearly important to me. And I know it’s niche, and I know it’s weird, but it’s been an experience being in the Fandom that’s really shaped me, it’s something that will stick with me for a long time, if not forever. And the Fandom itself has been really good too for most of the part! The art, the music, the talking with people, the support! But every single time something like this happens, toxicity begins to rise for absolutely no reason at all.

Let Homestuck have a Fandom.

Let people enjoy it without ironically throwing shit around.

You don’t want toxicity to increase and discourse to return? Then contribute to it. If you’re enough of a Fan to be insulting things and people, you’re enough of a Fan to shut down toxicity as it begins to rise.

The downfall of Fandoms right now isn’t the content, it’s not the toxicity or the cringe, it’s you policing how a specific Fandom has to work, enforcing stereotypes about Bad Things and Cringey Things, and then doing NOTHING to actually help stop Toxicity.

There’s nothing worse than a Fandom that doesn’t appreciate and try to better itself.

Don’t let this happen. Let Fans, new and old, enjoy Homestuck without shame.

And I know a lot of you don’t actually mean it and are just bandwagoning on the meme, and I bet even I may have reblogged or said something stupid like that before, but come on! This is an exciting time for everyone involved, it should be a matter or rejoicing, new Homestuck Books with commentary, the Game’s first Act finally out, famous Youtubers (@therealjacksepticeye) and Streamers playing Hiveswap and talking about Homestuck, hell, Rev Scarecrow from Vinesauce (@revscarecrow) took a God Tier test!!! How CRAZY is that??? Even in the prime of Homestuck Popularity I could’ve never imagined something like this. This is big. This is GOOD.

Why can’t you all just enjoy this as the good thing it is?

Please.

#jacksepticeye #Homestuck #Hiveswap #Upd8 #HS #Viz Media #Andrew Hussie #therealjacksepticeye #revscarecrow

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fictionalhell · 6 years

Text

Q&A With Aifrit

Overview.

We were given an opportunity to sit down and get a better understanding of who Aifrit is and after having a little fun going over her work we got to asking her a few questions.

The following is a record of the interview held by Zieg, Hail, Astro, and Luie with author Aifrit.

Q: So, we just recently started covering your fanfiction titled “Farronheit” and we where interested in knowing when exactly did you start writing “Farroncest” and why?

A: 2012. I distinctly remember sitting inside a classroom building in my softmore year of college waiting for my next class and was like “fuck I wanna write some Farroncest... but should I even do that? that lowkey sounds kinda immoral ew” because I found the FFXIII Kink Meme and there were some quality kink prompts on there and a handful of Farroncest ones. I remember sometime before even this I read some Farroncest fic about Lightning ravaging Serah in a bathroom during dinner with Snow and I was like “YOOOO THIS IS WHY PEOPLE WRITE THIS SHIP??” I felt so conflicted because I initially was like “why the FUCK would anyone write this ship???”

So then that day in that classroom building I just decided to write it and do it. And thus Bonding was born. Bonding is my first Farroncest fic ever and also my first smut fic ever. Looking back at it now, it’s really awkward to read and I cringe when I see it but I guess we gotta start somewhere huh?

Q: Do you write professionally or just as a hobby?

A: I don’t know if I could ever write professionally. I write too slowly tbh. It takes me ages just to write a couple thousand words if I’m not super in the mood. I do web development professionally, as well as a hobby, but as far as other hobbies? I love art but I never pursued it as much as I did writing because I always saw how bad my art was but it was hard to see how bad my writing was. I do love doing pixel art from time to time. I wanna get better at art and pixel art and I keep telling myself to, but I need to buckle down and actually deal with it, ugh.

Q: I’ve seen your pairing choices for your fanfictions so far but I have to ask, what was your first ship?

A: Definitely Kagome/Sesshoumaru before I even knew what shipping was. Good ol’ FF.net days. Q: You’ve come a long way and in that time you’ve written a good number of pieces. Which one of your works are you most proud of?

A: Blue Dream, the Lanille fic. I really wanted to capture that whole weird, floaty feeling of being high, and that feeling that time passes in like... scenes?? Like you can’t fully remember everything that happens but you get snippets of very specific things you do when you’re out — that’s why the last page or two of paragraphs are broken up so differently than the rest of the fic, like little micro screnes. I had a fucking blast writing that piece and I really hope other people enjoy it as much as I did. There’s a lot more I can say about it, including the minor reference to Final Fantasy IV and my decisions regarding how the smut scene was written. I could go into detail a bit if people cared haha.

Q: So, when you are writing, who or what is your inspiration when you write?

A: I started writing when I was little but I didn’t really have any real inspirations then. I wrote because it was fun to create something from almost nothing. The past few years I’ve had a couple inspirations. One writer from tumblr who wrote Princess Bubblegum/Marceline (Bubbline) fics from Adventure Time. They were EXTREMELY well-written. I mean that person’s just an amazing writer overall. What I loved about their writing was how they wrote in present tense. I don’t think I’d really seen this before and I loved how it made everything seem like it was happening now and not being retold by the narrator. Eventually they wrote less Bubbline, but they also got really annoying with their posting so I unfollowed. Oh well.

Now I don’t have many inspirations now, but I can say that as far as fanfiction is concerned, I do really wish I could write as well as SapphireSmoke. I haven’t read all her fics, but every one I do read is just so well-crafted and interesting, and the smut is top notch. I’m always fascinated every time I read a fic (they’re so long tho!).

Q: I understand you are currently on a hiatus, but what can we expect when you make your return to writing?

A: So the biggest reason why I’m on hiatus is because I have no motivation due to a variety of things (adulting, breakup, etc). I also haven’t felt very great about my writing for a long time and I’m trying to take a break to maybe regain some confidence. In any case, there’s a lot of stuff I wanna write when I start back up. I’ve been on a serious Doki Doki Literature Club kick. Love the idea of Monika trying to be the perfect girlfriend for the Player character, and I’d love to see them in some unorthodox fics like college settings where the game either doesn’t exist or exists in some other form.

I’d also love to write more Lanille. I still love this pairing a lot and can do a lot more with it, unlike the Farrons (still wanna write them too but they’re getting difficult). And there’s more that I wanna write too for other pairings including Fang/Serah and Paine/Rikku.

Q: Are you done with writing about the Farron sisters?

A: I am not done writing the Farrons. There’s still prompts I wanna do for Farronheit and I’d like to add to that until I completely burn out of them for good. They are definitely getting difficult to write. They feel too same-y, like there’s always some element of me making sure to show that their relationship is taboo, and then Serah using Snow as some sort of Lightning bait.... It gets repetitive.

Q: Outside of the erotic or smutty kind of stories what else have you written?

A: So I’m a gigantic werewolf fan and like inserting them into anything. I’ve liked them since I was a kid (probably Bloody Roar’s fault) and enjoy writing them as well. I’ve been disappointed with how werewolves are portrayed in media — boring ass one-dimensional movie monsters that are only good for killing. That gets stale. I wanted to write werewolves doing more shit — having families, lives, social circles, dealing with puberty and the shifting stage, dealing with their significant others and getting the courage to tell the ones who are human about their identity. I feel like those make more interesting stories. I literally am so obsessed with werewolves, I took the time out to do mass amounts of research to craft my own personal werewolf species to use as a basis for any werewolf fics I write after that. It needs to be edited heavily.

Q: Anything you don’t write?

A: I don’t have the stamina or speed to write a multichaptered fic, really, or at least a coherent one. I’ve tried with a Lanille once, and now I don’t want to finish the fic at all. Content-wise, and as far as smut, there are, of course, a list of kinks I am definitely not interested in and will never write. But it’s too hard to say on a general level.

Q: Do you have any issues with making sure your staying as true to the characters as possible? For example projecting yourself onto them. A: Lightning's personality is kinda close to my own so she's fairly easy to write. I can throw a lot more of myself into her and (hopefully) make her sound more realistic. Serah is a bit more difficult because her personality differs from mine so much (Vanille as well). I tried to do a lot of research on the characters before I wrote them so I played the game over, took note of different things like body language and verbal tics. like Lightning has a tendency to say "Right" when she faces an awkward or difficult situation and rolls her eyes a lot. Vanille bounces around a lot .

We’d like to thank Aifirit for taking the time to make this interview possible. @fyeahnix

#author interview #fanfiction #fanfic

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distant-rose · 6 years

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1, 10, 16, 22 FOR SALTY ASKS, BITCH! xo

1. What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get?

I’m going to say it and people are going to possibly fight me but Rumbelle. As someone who specializes in family and human rights law, it’s hard for me to watch because I feel like I’m watching one of my cases, particularly cases regarding Battered Women’s Syndrome where women are put through a cycle of abuse and affection that eventually leads to them snapping and killing their partners due to the constant fear that they feel. Granted, that didn’t happen on the show and I don’t think Adam & Eddy even have a clue what BWS is but it was the cycle that got me - the manipulation, the gaslighting and sometimes even trespass against the person via false imprisonment. (And yes, false imprisonment is categorized as trespass against the person in tort.) I constantly cringed while watching them mainly because it became clear many times that Rumple just doesn’t respect Belle’s autonomy and views her more as a coveted object than a partner.

Another is honestly…Kataang. I don’t find it abusive for the record or anything. And just a PSA out there for you, you CAN dislike a ship and not find it abusive, just saying. It’s more that I felt there wasn’t much chemistry for Aang and Katara. There was a serious maturity gap between them. I felt to me that Aang was always trying to hold on to his childhood and really not face issues unless they were pressing and he felt compelled too while Katara honestly acted more like an adult, which isn’t surprising considering the fact her mother died when she was young and she and Sokka were often left on their own because of the war. Katara really faced things head on and I feel like her actions towards Aang were more maternal than anything. @justanotherwannabeclassic and I have discussed this before but it feels like Katara was just a prize for Aang for saving the world and kinda lost her autonomy as person. She just became his girlfriend when she was a master fucking waterbender and I don’t think she would have been satisfied with just being a wife and mother, not that there is anything wrong with that but she’s very much into helping people and being a revolutionary - she was the fucking Painted Lady, c’mon now.

I could write an entire essay on these two and other ships but honestly this answer is long enough as is.

I’m gonna put my other answers under the cut because I have a lot of salt

10. Most disliked arc? Why?

Alana. Seriously. If I could, I would rewrite the entire Once Upon a Time show post-season three. There’s so many things I have an issue with in regard to OUAT but if I had to chose one and this is hard, but the entire Killian killed David’s Dad/Killian’s Realm Tour 2017. That story arc was bullshit, in fact most of season six was bullshit. Season five was also bullshit but I digress. Anyway, I think the whole issue of Killian killing Robert was fucking dumb and was just drama for drama’s sake because Adam and Eddy got lazy and apparently wrote the majority of their plots high, and not the good kind of high. Like the kinda high you get when you buy cheap ass marijuana from a sketchy street vender in Switzerland kinda high. That’s the minor beef I have with this arc, the main bit is the Emma moping and thinking Killian abandoned her nonsense. Girl, we just went through THREE SEASONS of crazy ass insanity where it was confirmed MANY times that Killian wasn’t ever going to leave her, loved her and would die like five hundred times for her. The fact that she immediately thought that he left instead of, maybe I don’t know, being kidnapped or hurt is just absurd to me. It’s fucking absurd.

16. If you could change anything in the show, what would you change?

Oh god, where to do I fucking begin. Number one, I would have had a fucking real overarching plot for OUAT and I would have totally reworked seasons four through seven with more original spins. One of the things that attracted me to the show in the first place was how they took characters like Snow White and Little Red Riding Hood and they turned them on their heads and made them bad ass and unique. That didn’t seem to happen much post-season three. I would have changed Elsa and Anna up a bit instead of making them carbon copies of their movie selves. It would be something making Elsa morally grey and a boss ass political bitch who gives Regina a run for her money and make Anna an absolute tomboy who have no interest in being a princess but would rather be a flower child and walk around in the woods all day bare foot and incredibly strong because all she does is climb trees. I love the idea of playing Elsa off as winter and Anna as a spring. Work with that. That would have been an interesting thing.

Also, I actually did not enjoy the author arc at all. I get the idea of playing around with the characters as inverse/opposites of their true natures but I just rolled my eyes a lot. I would have done an entirely different arc, maybe looked more at realm traveling or you know actually address whether people want to return to the Enchanted Forrest. Hell, I would have maybe even done something about the town line and whether the citizens of Storybrooke wanted to explore the outside world.

Dark Swan was a wasted opportunity in my opinion and they really missed a chance to make Emma actually do some really crazy shit and you know confront some of the issues that had been buried under the rug in the past few seasons but that’s not biggest issue actually. I had more issues with the Underworld as a Greek mythology buff than I did with Dark Swan but how they did the Dark Ones thing could have been so much better. But Underworld deserves more of my beef. *sigh* That, personally to me, was a wasted arc creatively. Don’t get me wrong, I cried like a bit at the elevator scene but I feel like they should have gone more Greek myth than Disney Hades. I think I’ve said before to @katie-dub that it would have been more interesting if Hades wasn’t so much of an antagonist but more of someone who misleads them into thinking that Killian is in the worst part of the Underworld while he really isn’t, he’s either on the Asphodel Meadows and doesn’t remember her or in Elysium where he’s completely at peace and taking him back would pose more of a moral question for Emma on whether or not she should.

We can all agree that seasons six is a train wreck right? I was a little annoyed at the timelines and the issues brought up in regard to Captain Swan. It seemed like they were issues that had been addressed or should have been addressed in previous seasons. I found the whole wedding thing super rushed. I would have been content if Captain Swan had more of background role drama-wise and maybe they actually used the wedding to really build on Emma and Snow’s relationship more because it had been strongly ignored. The Black Fairy was a wasted villain and Gideon wasn’t really necessary. Let’s be real, that final battle was a massive letdown and the last time I checked a TLK doesn’t save you from normal mortal wounding. I kinda wished they played around with the Untold Stories Thing a bit more in S6. I would have totally nixed the Wish Realm and the Musical Episode even though I liked the music. I just found a lot of their plots confusing, unnecessary and tired.

Okay, I didn’t watch a lot of season seven but I do have an issue with the recycling of plots and characters. I don’t mind Jacinda or Tilly/Alice but I found the whole recycle of Alice in Wonderland and Cinderella a sign that the creative well had run dry. I wish they had work with new material and stories such as the Labyrinth, Black Cauldron, Treasure Island, Atlantis or even fucking Enchanted. They could have also worked in on some of the legends from 1,001 Arabian Nights, worked more with Greek mythology particularly the Odyssey or the Argonauts. There’s a lot of creative things they could have done and just didn’t do. You’re welcome to like season seven and the characters it introduced but it just felt more like a money grab with incredibly lazy writing.

22. Popular character you hate?

I have a feeling a lot of people might unfollow me for this one but David Tennant’s Tenth Doctor. Like I’m sure not a lot of people have noticed this but I do not reblog anything with Ten in it. I know he’s everyone’s favorite and people love him and think he’s attractive but I actually hate his treatment of Rose, Martha and Donna as well as his weird space casanova act. I actually don’t really like Ten/Rose that much mainly because Ten doesn’t seem to have the same love and denotation for her that Nine did and was totally cool with leaving her and Mickey alone in a murder robot infested space in the 51st century to chase after Madame Pompadour. I don’t think the Ninth “I could save the world but lose you” Doctor would have done the whole “does it need saying?” and would have left Rose in Pete’s World with his clone without giving her a say. I was really irked by that. He whined about how much he missed Rose for TWO. WHOLE. FUCKING. SEASONS and when she came back, he’s like “here, have my clone and fuck off.” It bothered me so much and I think a lot of Rose hate is honestly based off Ten’s melodramatic ass and how he whined about missing Rose and made Martha feel inferior. Martha Jones was a fucking boss and didn’t deserve the shit he gave her. And then, we have Donna, poor Donna who didn’t get a choice at all in her fate. He chose it for her and that will never not bother me. Rose, Martha and Donna deserved more. End of story.

#asks #answered #starlessness #ro speaks #meme bullshit #salty asks #I AM A VERY SALTY PERSON #I'M NOT SORRY #personal

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