Crazy that Izumi called her employee at the meat shop and said something to the effect of, "Hey, I know I'm only giving you a couple hours notice but I've got two kids that I'm going to ditch in Yock Island for a month to test them, could you hide there and watch over them covertly to make sure they don't die. I'll pay you extra if you also put on a komainu mask and terrorize the shit out of them." And then Mason, the otherwise completely normal butcher's assistant, was like, "How did you know this was my life's dream," and went off to live in the wilderness and attack children for thirty days and nights.

KinnPorsche Music in Context: Episode One

It needs to be said: I started thinking about how a few of the songs used as KinnPorsche background music had incredibly apt or punny titles months ago. It’s been sort of poking around in my head that it might be some light, surface level meta to collect!

Ho boy was I wrong. I don’t know what I expected because absolutely nothing in KinnPorsche is just surface level. In episode one, I have already found several hysterical jokes, commentary on the shifting power dynamics, water symbolism, and many more gems.

Here is the link to my episode one Spotify playlist. I know there are quite a few playlists out there, but even scouring three of them, I still found additional songs that were not cited or mentioned.

There are 37 (yes, you read that correctly, 37!) songs in episode one and that's in addition to a handful of reprisals, so the insanely long list is under the cut.

For other episodes (as I get to them), go here!

We start, of course, with our beloved theme song, เพียงไว้ใจ (or PhiangWaichai) by Slot Machine. There’s plenty of thoughts on this, I’m not digging into it.

Introducing Kinn – Quantum Sonata by FormantX.

Kinn and Big head into the Italian’s den – Our Final Mission by Christoffer Moe Ditlevsen. This is the last time Big will join Kinn on a mission as his head bodyguard (I’m not crying, you’re crying.)

Introducing Don and the Italian gang – Waltz for Little Italy by Bireli Snow.

Introducing Porsch – Diggin' the Drama by The New Fools.

Kinn making accusations and  Porsche mixing drinks hoping to get lucky – Covert Affairs by Christoffer Moe Ditlevsen.

After Kinn's iconic "I'm more like my mom," we are introduced to the song that makes the most appearances this episode: Concerto No. 2 in G Minor, L’estate (Summer) composed by Antonio Vivaldi. Now here’s where the KinnPorsche crew start to do what they do best: give us things to obsess over and over analyze.

The concerto has 3 movements and to be honest I’m not 100% sure that they pull from only one of them for the show. Remember when I said I wasn’t musically inclined? If anyone wants to chime in, please do.

Another fun thing about this Concerto? It is traditionally associated with or accompanied by a trio of sonnets (one for each movement). Oh, did I mention Vivaldi was Italian? Themes.

Anyway, the sonnets translated from Italian to English:

I. Allegro non molto– Under the heat of the burning summer sun, Languish man and flock; the pine is parched. The cuckoo finds its voice, and suddenly, The turtledove and goldfinch sing. A gentle breeze blows, But suddenly, the north wind appears. The shepherd weeps because, overhead, Lies the fierce storm, and his destiny. II. Adagio; Presto– His tired limbs are deprived of rest By his fear of lightning and fierce thunder, And by furious swarms of flies and hornets. III. Presto– Alas, how just are his fears, Thunder and lightening fill the Heavens, and the hail Slices the tops of the corn and other grain.

Source

Porsche and his fanclub at Hum Bar – Late Nights by Daxton.

When Yok calls Porsche over to the bar – Mysterious Madeline by Lucas Pittman.

As Kinn is driving over the bridge and they realize they're being followed (and when Porsche is making eyes at the woman across the bar) – Road of Fury by John Abbot.

Big and Kinn fleeing into the tunnels when Big is shot and Kinn is being chased down – They Are Coming by Hampus Naeselius.

There is a brief snippet here with a snare drum and a cymbal (I think?) when Porsche is cheekily asking Kinn for money and pissing in a bottle, but I couldn’t isolate it enough to find it. Any help would be appreciated!

Here, we’re introduced to the perfect fights song, Absolute Power by Hampus Naeselius, when Porsche beats down the street thugs and drives off with Kinn.

She Knocks by Lukas Amil plays when Porsche is being a brat and leaves Kinn at the gas station.

When Porsche comes home to Chay bandaging up Arthee – In Rain - Indigo Days. Can you say water symbolism?

The Joys And Sorrows of Life by Johannes Bornlöf gives a little hope when Porsche and Arthee are sitting and talking about finances and how much they could make off Kinn’s watch.

Porsche at the underground fighting ring has three songs in quick succession: Back to Where it Began by Rockin' For Decades,

Second Hand Slide by Lucas Pittman,

And Around the Bend by Pip Mondy as he turns the fights to his favor. [It is worth noting that they use a sort of stripped down version during most of it, but I couldn't find that version, so they may have done it themselves]

When Porsche comes home to Chay and Arthee celebrating making so much money off the watch we get Gentleman at Heart by Indigo Days. I think this one’s interesting because I’m actually not sure if it’s about Arthee or Porsche…

When Don finds his men tied up and (maybe dead?) – Let Me Introduce Myself by Rune Dale. This comes right after the scene where Korn chastises Kinn for his decision to enrage Don instead of “giving him gifts.” This is Kinn telling Don exactly how he plans to run things and how very different he is from his father. Kinn's mother must have been ruthless with a good sense of humor.

When Kinn asks Chan about finding Jom/Porsche, we're back to Vivaldi’s Concerto. Like the shepherd, Porsche's Destiny hangs over his head.

College Porsche and his stolen pastry get Moonshiner's Turn by Martin Landström.

Jom is approached to act as "a waiter who's actually the greatest boxer undercover,” our dear theater kid gets Concert Hall Hideout by Stationary Sign.

A moment later when Porsche realizes he's been caught? Cheese! by Alexandra Woodward. [This one is not on the Spotify playlist but I did find it on Epidemic Sound.]

When Porsche calls Chay, worried that Chay may be targeted or even taken by Kinn? Extraction by Christoffer Moe Ditlevsen. Which is a truly horrible double entendre because the very next song is

Clogged Up by Jerry Lacey. I'm not even dignifying this scene with a response.

Kinn sweet talking Yok (with veiled threats) – Infiltrator by Christoffer Moe Ditlevsen.

Porsche’s kidnapping – Honor the Brave by Hampus Naeselius. 

Kinn reading Porsche his own biography – Beryllium - Farrell Wooten. Beryllium is, according to a brief google search, a natural metal that is expensive, brittle, and dangerous to work with (toxic).

Porsche's fight theme – Absolute Power. Except who has the power this time?

Brief reprise of She Knocks as Kinn once again watches Porsche walk away from him (or throw himself off the boat in this case).

When Korn and Kinn discuss how to force Porsche, and moving into the next scene when Porsche finds Chay cleaning up after another break-in, and through to Porsche finding Thee being beaten up – The Stakeout by Christoffer Moe Ditlevsen.

When the loan shark tells Porsche that Thee still owes despite Porsche believing they had paid things off, leading to Porsche forcefully kicking Thee out of his and Chay's life? Ghosting by Christopher Moe Ditlevsen.

When Porsche finally tells Thee to leave and after, when Porsche goes home alone to clean up his ruined house, we get one of my all time favorites – Bitter Heart - Instrumental Version by Memi. Although the soundtrack presumably uses the instrumental version, I would argue that the lyrics were taken into account when choosing it:

“Suddenly you look like a stranger A face I knew, but I must've forgotten … We know we could've done it better Fought for the little things that we wanted … Oh, I wish that you hadn't pulled the trigger Shot me down with my bitter heart My blood is getting thicker You shot me down, you shot me down With my bitter heart”

This is getting way too long, so I cut some of the lyrics but I strongly recommend checking out the original.

As Chay tells Porsche that their parents would be proud of him, there is a very brief reprisal of In Rain.

It then switches to No More Drama by Eric Feinberg as they hug and Porsche tucks Chay in. This calls back to the song that first accompanied Porsche, Diggin’ the Drama, and Porsche has made his decision. He can't keep living like this and he can't let Chay live like this either. 

Porsche's letter and Kinn pouring himself a drink – a reprisal of Gentleman at Heart.

During the famous "your life is mine" scene where, at least in the translation, Porsche asks if Kinn is a god, we get a third reprisal of the Concerto. Porsche's destiny is set, the storm has blown in and ruined his life leaving him desperate.

When Porsche confronts Korn and asks to be Big and Ken's boss and through to Korn Playing Chess – So to Say by Taylor Crane

At which point we get one, final reprise of the Concerto as Korn places the Queen on the board and the game begins.

Finally – Free Fall by Slot Machine.

And, in the interest of being thorough....

Episode Two Preview – Global Impact by Philip Ayers.

i have a headache and can NOT think clearly enough to really gather my thoughts but as much as i really did like atsv there were just. things about it that didnt work for me. and like mostly i was not big on how they did the “canon events” stuff like im not AGAINST it just at points felt like sort of redoing the moment in itsv where after aaron dies the other spiderpeople are able to comfort and relate to miles because they’ve been through similar things and this is like... that but in a technical lore way and not hitting the same emotional beat?? like obvioulsy they’re taking it somewhere different and its about like defying the story that’s laid out for you and i LIKE that but. idk. and im like yeah obviously theres stuff thats part of the spiderman origin story we KNOW this we did it already in the last movie and it was a great scene. and also like theres no way everything they referenced is 100% true for every version of spiderman, even every single one that cameos in the movie?? idk. it just Frustrated me in a way that i truly cannot put my finger on

@pasta-pardner Buck and the Preacher set dressing in Nope (2022, dir. Peele)

Finally the war is finally over <- I finally got through that freaking Percabeth short story why was the writing on it so freaking bad

I think a lot about the Concept of ‘choices that matter’ in video games. Like, in terms of what it is that makes a choice ‘really matter’, what do we perceive as a choice that matters or has a consequence, how do different games with different amounts of branching or non-branching storylines play with those ideas…  Especially because Undertale is one of my favorite games of all time, and it has often been hyped as ‘a game where your choices REALLY matter’ and… honestly, I dunno if all of this hype was fully conducive to Undertale.  Because the way it handles the concept of Video Game Choices is actually a lot more interesting and complex than that simplistic descriptor makes it seem.

Because Undertale actually has a lot of choices that ‘don’t really matter’! Lots of dialogue choices and silly little decisions that on a first playthrough seem like they’re some sort of moral choice or a branching plotline but end up always leading to basically the same result regardless of what you do!

And the game doesn’t really try to hide the fact that these choices are kinda 'Fake'. I mean, on a first playthrough a player might assume there’s gonna be some Massive Consequences for picking the ‘wrong’ drink on Undyne’s date, but the game’s narrative expects for there to be multiple playthroughs and pretty much every Choice that Doesn’t Matter is peppered with that Undertale brand of wacky character-focused humor that inherently makes the moment memorable. Papyrus leading Undyne straight to you no matter what you do is basically a cross-timeline running gag.

On some level I see this as a sort of gag that serves as meta-commentary about the expectations around Choices That Matter in Video Games. As in, a lot of games have their Moral Choices happen in clearly easily marked ‘this is a Moral Choice!’ moments within the story, while the actual gameplay (and any violence the player might cause as part of said gameplay) is basically entirely divorced from any element of narrative-branching and doesn't effect the story at all. Undertale basically entirely inverts this dynamic; the most important factor for which Route you’re own is how you handle your FIGHTs, and what seems like clearly-marked and obvious Moral Choices are just goofy insubstantial minor changes in dialogue. 

But also… there is also a level where you must ask yourself ‘what does it mean when we say that these choices Don’t Matter’. I mean, it’s not like they didn't change anything about the game, the Player still made the character say that other thing, the choice probably led to an alternate piece of dialogue, probably a joke with a call-back at the end of the game… The line between a one-off joke and an actual story-changing moment can be a little blurry if you look at it too deeply.

For example, near the end of the Waterfall part of the game, the Player is given the choice to save Monster Kid even at the risk of having to face down Undyne.

Pretty much anyone who isn’t deliberately trying to be an asshole is going to rush to save them and obviously that includes the Pacifist Route Players. But you can actually leave Monster Kid to die without it 'mattering' in the sense that it wouldn't divert you from the Pacifist Route. Undyne saves them instead of you, and ends up with slightly less HP for her battle (which might Matter for Runs when you try and FIGHT her but obviously not in Pacifist Runs) and… by the end of the game, during the extremely happy True Pacifist Ending, they still clearly remember that you abandoned them and are upset by it.

So… does saving Monster Kid ‘matter’ or not? On one hand, choosing not to save them mostly just changes a few lines of dialogue but… these lines of dialogue kinda recontextualize this happy ending and the Player’s actions in general. Despite the True Pacifist Ending otherwise portraying the Player/Frisk as a kind-hearted and brave hero... they still did this undeniably cowardly (and perhaps even cruel) act to one of their friends .

Was running away and leaving Monster Kid to die a brief but significant moment of weakness that the Player regrets and has cost them what could’ve been the start of a lovely friendship? Or is that simply that being a True Pacifist was always more of a matter of pragmatism rather than ideals? Were they only acting as a Pacifist to get that promised 'Best Ending', and only Monster Kid has an inkling they are not as heroic or kind as everyone thinks they are?

And then there’s the Snowman ‘quest’.

A free healing item given early in the game, with your mission being to carry it along in your inventory for as long as you can without ever consuming it. The only reward you will ever see from it is a few lines of dialogue…

But for many, it is more than enough of an incentive to preserve the Snowman’s Piece. You can do whatever you want with the Snowman without it ‘mattering’ in terms of Ending or consequences. You could carry it through all of your adventures with care and kindness... or you could eat it while he can’t see you and then go back to him and tell him that you ‘lost’ it and then get another piece and eat that as well, you could eat it right in front of his face, horrifying him. 

And much like with Monster Kid, you can STILL get the True Pacifist Ending after doing that, all that would change is a few optional pieces of dialogue from the Snowman… 

And a total recontextualization of the Player’s behavior and the ending. The Snowman sees the Player as a cruel and heartless person who is just pretending to be good so they can be liked - the way they acted with this immobile, powerless Snowman who could do nothing for them and their reputation reveals their true self. And he says their friends will realize that too one day...

Doing a True Reset on the Pacifist Ending is, by definition, a (almost) consequence-free action and yet it changes future Pacifist Routes immeasurably. Turning the Player into a Hypocrite doing the exact same thing they were trying to stop Flowey/Asriel from doing - trapping all of their friends into a time-loop so they can play with them forever while never actually letting them to enjoy freedom on the surface, simply because they are not willing to move on or put their friends' wishes and agency above their own. Nothing in the game actually changes, not one character can even suspect that you did something like that, and yet for the Player - this choice makes the entire Meaning of the game flip on its head. 

Even the most famous and heavily-toted Big Consequence in the whole game - selling your soul to Chara after completing a Murder Route… mostly what it does is just… recontextualize the ending of the Game.

As a game, ‘Undertale’ is very much about the ways in which a Player engages with a game can radically recontextualize it. The huge chasm of difference between the Pacifist and Muder Routes is just the most literal example of it. But, in a way, even the tiny little Dialogue Options - where the lack of real choice and consequences is Obviously a Joke - matter. Because of the way they can recontextualize the Player Character’s behavior.

(Okay, maybe not this one, but hear me out…)

Do you trust Papyrus to not betray you, even after you spied on him with Undyne?

Do you have the integrity to admit you forgot something or got it wrong even when there’s no consequences for just lying about it?

Are you a hypocrite for trying to get Alphys to be truthful with Undyne only to then immediately turn around and lie to Undyne yourself?  

None of these choices matter for the ending, some of them don’t even get, like, a call-back joke or anything, but… if you are engaged in this story as a narrative, if you are invested in these characters as if they were people, if you are honestly trying to be the best person you can be, if you are trying to self-reflect at the way you approach this game… even the silliest little dialogue option can suddenly be imbued with deep implications and you can make them matter. 

Undertale is one of the best demonstrations of this concept, but this is absolutely not exclusive to it. For example….

‘Ace Attorney’ is pretty much as far away as you can get from a ‘branching narrative’ within the video game sphere. It is a heavily-linear Visual Novel where 70% of the time it won’t even let you talk to random characters at anything but the exact order it expects you to and any ‘Bad Endings’ are basically just glorified Game Over Screens. (... because this is the Internet and something something piss on the poor, I should probably specify that I am talking about ‘Ace Attorney’ because I love Ace Attorney and these are neutral descriptions of the game and not complaints. There’s nothing wrong with a game being linear.) 

If there’s any Dialogue Choice in AA, it’s generally a very basic ‘right answer-wrong answer’ choice between Progress and a Penalty, or a total non-choice that just gets you to the same final result regardless. Except… Well… as we just talked about, getting to the same final result doesn’t necessarily mean a choice is ‘meaningless’, does it?

There’s actually a lot of great storytelling moments where Ace Attorney, despite its otherwise strict linearity, uses this exact sort of recontextualizing mindset I’ve talked about with Undertale to make choices with some really powerful emotional impact…. Even if technically, the ending is the same ending. It can be something as basic as ‘even if picking this Wrong Answer doesn’t get me a penalty, it still embarrassed my character and disappointed my friends/rivals and thus I feel bad for picking it’. Consequences as recontextualizing your character as more incompetent than they should’ve come across at that moment.

And then there’s moments like the iconic ending of ‘Justice for All’. That moment before Franziska bursts into the Courtroom with the case-making evidence and saves the day. The moment where it seems like Phoenix really is gonna have to pick between protecting his best friend and carrying out a rightful sentence.

The player gets to pick between the two options, but Phoenix never gets to say his choice out loud before Franziska comes running in... and yet… he, and the player, still made that choice. Even if no one ever has to experience the consequences of your choice, even if the rest of the world has no idea what Phoenix Wright would’ve chosen if the Miracle hadn’t happened, we know what we picked and that knowledge of the choice matters. Because of how we feel about this choice and what it says about our interpretation of Phoenix… and about us.

There’s also a bit of this ludonarrative device in ‘The Great Ace Attorney: Adventures’. During “The Adventures of the Runaway Room”, when you investigate the Omnibus for the second time and start finding things that… don’t quite fit together. When you’re finally starting to make progress with proving McGilded’s innocence, while also maybe starting to notice that something is… wrong with these pieces of evidence. 

The unchanging linear narrative of the game is that Ryunosuke does eventually realizes McGilded's trickery, puts truth ahead of victory in court and yet, despite his effort and good intentions - the case still ends with a false Not Guilty verdict. And yet, the Player has the choice to... tweak the details.

There are several points where Ryunosuke can object, where he can call out the inconsistencies even though they help his case, where he can support Van Zieks in his accusations of tempered evidence... or he can not. Not necessarily intentionally misleading the Court as much as subconsciously trying to ignore the inconsistencies in the name of trusting his client.

And yet… in the end it doesn’t matter. Maybe Susato calls out the inconsistency instead of him, maybe Van Zieks does, maybe it remains uncontested but... no matter what you do, the case will end with a Not Guilty verdict (I mean, I guess you can deliberately fail the game but that will not progress the plot), McGilded doesn’t seem like he held a grudge (in the few minutes he had left to live), and a few cases later - Ryunosuke would always be punished for his part at this false verdict.

So it doesn’t really matter what Ryunosuke did back then? Does it matter if he did his best and called out every single inconsistencies or if he kinda half-assed it until he (and the Player) had to? He’s still going to suffer the same consequences down the line. And yet….

And yet, I think there’s something so powerful about giving us that option. About knowing that Ryunosuke, and we, did try and do something about McGilded's dirty tricks- even if it didn’t work. Or alternative, knowing that there was more that Ryunosuke and us could’ve done even if it was not nearly enough. Even if in the eyes of the game and the British Justice system there is no difference, the fact that we know what did and what we could’ve done can radically change the way the player feels about all of the later scenes concerning the truth about McGilded’s trial. It can radically change the way the player interpret Ryunosuke’s feelings about it as well.

Because even though the game itself keeps playing along with the same script regardless, that trial had irrevocable consequences for the Player.

JUST ABSOLUTELY LOST MY GODDAMNED MIND ABOUT ALL OF THIS. For one, it's a little stunning to see it so clearly confirmed that Tim had romantic feelings for Conner, that the series may not have said it in those specific words, but that is very much exactly what was being said here. When I first read through this, I wondered if they were trying to walk a fine line of, well, we can't just say that Robin was in love with Superboy, but you can make it clear through context, but there's something else interesting going on here--that Tim doesn't say much of anything directly to Conner himself. Bart and Cassie both seem to know more than Conner does, they both seem to get Tim to open up to them a little bit more than Conner does. He doesn't want to talk about what "phase" he's going through when Conner's there, he doesn't actually say, "I was in love with you!" when they have their big fight, despite that even Bart's like, "You two only care about each other!", despite that it's very directly clear that Tim knows what he felt back then and why he kissed Cassie. There's a bunch of things going on in this series (the trauma that these kids are still dealing with, Cassie's issues with the team, Bart feeling like he's treated as nothing but comedic relief, the villain trying to put them all back in the boxes they were in during that time, despite not understanding who they really were, the meta commentary on how fans hate new characters/heroes and praise the old days, etc.) but specifically, Kon's trauma at having died and feeling like it didn't matter, everyone just sort of moved on and he doesn't really know where to go from here, versus Tim's still digging himself out of the absolute wreck that Conner's death left him with, that it genuinely destroyed him, that he felt dead without Conner, but that he became who he was today because of how all of them affected each other, that thinking of Conner brought him back, too. But he never says it explicitly to Conner. He never says, "I was in love with you." He won't even say that he's dating a guy now, he just slides right past that, when Conner's in the room. Conner does seem to pick up on that by the end--when the various new characters are shown by the villain, Tim sees Bernard and says his name, there's a moment where Kon just looks at him and seems to understand, but it feels very much like, ohhhhh, Tim's feelings for Conner aren't necessarily over. Yeah, he's dating someone else, someone he genuinely loves, but if he can't even say the direct words to Conner, if he can't even say that he's dating a guy to Conner, that makes me really think Tim's feelings aren't as resolved as he might try to project. His emotional climax in this series is still about how Conner shaped the course of his life, his heart and his soul, that the series shows the sheer amount of history and impact they've had on each other--not always wholly good, as Bart points out that they get so wrapped up in each other, to the exclusion of the others, but that's just more fodder for the tremendous scope of their effect on each other--I just kept thinking, man, this is the kind of epic relationship fodder that I would expect from a pairing like Lois and Clark or something! Not just that feelings were there, but that those feelings entirely changed how the characters' hearts reacted. It's still kind of a novelty to get any kind of confirmation that Tim was in love with Conner, that there's hints those feelings aren't gone, but also just how big their dynamic really is and how they really do feel like one of those supercouples that have an epic story to tell.

The Undeniable Queerness of Enchanté the Series

(thank you @ranchthoughts for letting me ramble about this in your inbox before turning my thoughts into a post)

there are bls and then there are bls. right? there are dead fish kisses and there are characters who kiss each other like their lives depend on it.

and enchanté firmly belongs in the second category. 1,500-word essay under the cut.

there is such a consistent and tangible queer undercurrent to everything that's happening on this show and i'm not just talking about the fact that several scenes look like they could be the opening scene of a gay porno. or the surprise bondage. or force in drag. or proposing marriage in front of the eiffel tower. no, there's this aching, desperate desire underlying everything. theo has--in addition to his main love interest--four very hot gay suitors who all very obviously desire him carnally... this is some sort of gay manic pixie dream boy wish fulfilment fantasy and i am absolutely eating it up.

there is a vibe to the show that @ranchthoughts called "fanfic-like", and i would argue that that's because enchanté is actually fanfiction of the little prince. (i'm planning on making a separate post soon about how the book was referenced on and used as inspiration for the show.)

enchanté is fully aware of its own fictionality. it is on-the-nose fictional. but that's what makes it so much fun--it's not trying to be something it isn't.

take the reading memories segments in episode 4 [3/4] for example: these scenes were incredibly cringe, like, full-on bad-green-screen terrible-costumes-and-wigs hilarious-acting cringe, but fully aware of their own cringe-ness. (also, gawin was both in drag and naked in the same scene as two different characters, like. get on enchanté's level.) (incidentally, can anyone tell me what character aou/phupha was supposed to be? i got detective conan, monkey d. luffy and momotarō for the others, but i'm stumped on phupha's character.)

and that self-awareness makes it camp! there is such a level of camp to the whole show which feels extremely intentional (especially in the first two thirds), almost like a meta-commentary: "this is the genre. we know it's stupid but we love it here", and i adore that. they know the tropes, they know the bl landscape, and they're just having fun with all of it.

and the whole set-up in itself is a queer allegory, isn't it? theo and akk are "from different worlds", so to speak, hindered in their love not just by their complete inability to communicate but also by their forced separation as children. when they meet again, theo doesn't really belong anywhere, he's an outsider both in france and in thailand, he is unable to act the way thai society expects him to act (e.g. failing to show the proper respect to the seniors), unable to get his parents to understand him while being actively lied to by them (the whole ocean of miscommunication in that family deserves its own post), harboring feelings for his childhood friend his whole life but unable to voice them in a normal sort of way, instead falling back on concocting the most convoluted, immediately backfiring plan to try to make akk jealous and get him to confess his feelings first.

theo is fundamentally isolated because he grew up between two cultures, and neither one quite fits him: when he's in france, he is comforted by thai food and the only people he's close with (his grandmother and sun) are from thailand like himself; but when he's in thailand, he can't quite get used to the social conventions and makes social blunders, he is very slow at writing in thai.

it's such a poignant queer allegory in my opinion. they didn't end up making as much a point of it on the show as they could have, but it very much informed my whole reading of the show and the characters. there is a sort of inability to articulate his experience surrounding theo that makes him even more isolated and screams "baby gay in need of a community" to me. having akk share his experience at the end is something that i'm not a big fan of for other, unrelated reasons (might make a separate post about enchanté's ending and why it fell flat for me), but when looking at it through this lens, it is the only way for akk to really get theo, to really understand his struggle on a fundamental level.

which brings me back to that desire i mentioned earlier: theo desires akk, very much so, there are a whole handful of scenes where akk gets close to him and theo closes his eyes, expecting to finally be kissed by him, but more than that, he desires understanding. he often brushes off his own difficulties and has a tendency to be emotionally clueless (for example about his parents' divorce), but what i see most in his character is the desire to be understood, to be seen by akk, for akk to see him for who he is and to love him for who he is. (akk, of course, has been doing both of those things all along. he's constantly taking pictures of theo, he's watching him through his window--with theo's full knowledge--he is always looking at him, he's always loving him.)

it's not inherently queer to want to be loved as we truly are, i believe heterosexual people experience this, too, but in the context of queerness itself, being perceived as queer by other queer people is indeed a fundamental aspect to experiencing queer love (maybe not in gay for you bls, but i haven't heard of much gay for you happening in real life). not to be unscientific about this, but the vibes of the perception aspect of enchanté are just very queer to me, you know?

oh, and speaking of desire: enchanté in general is very physical. there is a level of intimacy between the actors and the camera that seems incredibly intentional: there are several shower scenes, scenes of theo and akk shirtless, TWO (2) nude gawin scenes (though one of those is sadly a fake-out and he is actually wearing shorts), many, many scenes that include bare feet, which is not something i see super often in bl, at least not to the point that i notice the frequency of it.

enchanté is very rooted in the physical reality of desirable bodies: theo is allowed to openly, physically flirt with saifa, even though that's not even his endgame love interest, phupha uses physical touch in his pursuit of theo, natee shows his obsession with theo by drawing his face/body about a hundred times, and akk and theo are wholly unable to keep their hands off each other. i've joked about the intricate rituals, but seriously, they are constructing so many intricate rituals. there are two separate scenes in which they make up excuses to kiss each other's elbows/arms/backs. they keep touching each other in a thousand ways, in every possible way they can that is still plausibly deniable as physical desire--until they kiss while watching that movie and then it's just a game of chicken of who will confess first. because their physical attraction to each other is undeniable. it's obvious. this was really refreshing to see in a genre that so often plays with the blushing maiden trope, and one character is so often made to pursue the other: on enchanté, akk and theo are equally horny for each other. it's not their lack of physical attraction that keeps them apart for so long.

(sadly, the show then shies away from actually getting very sexually physical: after their desperate, stunning, amazing balcony-kiss, they aren't allowed to be horny for each other in the last two episodes, when they're actually in a relationship. this is just one of the many aspects that i didn't like about the conclusion of the story, because you simply cannot tell me that these two as we got to know them in episodes 1 to 8 would really be as chaste with each other as they're shown in episodes 9 and 10.)

leaving that aside for the moment, let's talk about that kiss. as mentioned right at the beginning, when these two kiss each other on the balcony, it's desperation in its rawest form. these two--and especially theo--crave each other. theo kisses akk like he will die without him. theo kisses akk like he can finally breathe. theo kisses akk like he never wants to do anything else ever again.

i'm a bit obsessed with book's acting here, because of all the kissing scenes i've seen him in, i think this is THE most desperate one. force plays it a bit more subtle, but book's expression is full-on anguish. theo waited his whole life to be kissed by akk, and book portrays that so beautifully, with such depth. it's one of my favorite bl kisses for sure, it's played with so much heart, so much feeling, that it's hard to even think of kisses that compare, apart from the bad buddy episode 5 rooftop kiss.

anyway, all of this to say that enchanté to me is deeply, lovingly queer, and it's a shame that so many people are sleeping on it. (and that includes myself, i was wary about watching this show for a long time because i'd heard so many negative things about it.)

but i'm here to tell you: watch enchanté. it's wonderful, it's hilariously funny, it's endearing, it has book and force in it, and it is extremely queer.

There seems to have been a little meta-commentary in Good Omens 2 about priorities.

Priorities? Is that the right term? Well, that's what I'm going with for now.

Anyway, there seems to be some meta-commentary about people's priorities being off. Aziraphale's priorities being off, with the whole cotillion ball. The audience's priorities being off.

Or maybe a better way to put it is that our priorities are premature. There's nothing wrong with them in themselves, but we've skipped some important issues that have to be addressed first.

Think about it - there are so many moments that look "fanservicey" on the surface, but that end up being problematic for the plot (the I'm Sorry dance), a moment of disconnect (the dance at the cotillion ball), or that simply foreshadow the sadness of the ending (Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy playing, but omitting the part about dining at the Ritz).

No, no, I'm not suggesting the creative team tailored an entire section of a story to address fandom trends; they were just telling the best story they could, universally, period. None of that stuff would be in there if it wasn't in the service of something much bigger. I'm also not suggesting that this commentary is a lecture, some sort of condescending finger-wag; more on that later.

But you can't deny that when all the pieces come together, the story resonates with that thing in us anyway - the thing in us that says, "I know it's Armageddon and I know the world is ending, but Aziraphale and Crowley really ought to have a romantic dance about it." And then the story tells us, "Nope. They can't do that yet."

Here's the other thing, though: even as it is told "no," that deep desire to see love as an action, love as the whole point, is validated. It is also treated with kindness and respect. Yes! Even through the sad ending of the season!

Through the dangers that Crowley and Aziraphale face in Season 2, the narrative patiently explains all the reasons why they can't be soft and romantic just yet. Their trauma histories won't allow it. Their world won't allow it. These are real, pressing problems. In fact, they're more real and pressing than I thought they were even in Season 1! Season 2 emphasizes just how much Crowley and Aziraphale were never going to get away from Heaven and Hell without a brutal fight of some kind. At the end of Season 1, I sometimes thought, "Oh, the great bureaucracy of the universe really doesn't care about these two, or even about Earth; if they really wanted to be together, they could be. And maybe Heaven and Hell will just lose interest in Earth." And Season 2 says, "Actually, here are a bunch of scenes demonstrating that they desperately want to be together, and here are a bunch of dangerous situations illustrating why they can't."

But at the same time, the love is there, in both Crowley and Aziraphale. Crowley loves Aziraphale so much that he can't think of anything but safety for their new way of life; Aziraphale loves Crowley so much that he simply cannot consider that they haven't arrived at their happy ending yet. That love is the beating heart between our narrative's wings, the purring motor* in our narrative's Bentley. It's there, and it matters. The love matters so deeply.

I don't know. Maybe "priorities" was not in fact the right word to choose at the beginning there. Because there is no implication that there is anything wrong with caring most of all about love. It's just that love is a complicated journey, and you can't skip over the journey part of it.

*(Not my metaphor. Originally from Amy Gravino; too good to leave out.)

2023: The year of all time

This felt like the first year post-COVID where things really kicked into high gear for me personally. My new year's resolution was that I would go out and have fun for once.

And had fun I did.

I did some voicework reading for a story podcast, I went to a bunch of amazing concerts (nothing beats seeing Weird Al for my birthday!), and I sorted out a bunch of RL stuff and put a neat little bow on it. Thank goodness.

But fuck all that sappy shit: Here's a small collection of things I really enjoyed this year!

Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse: An excellent sequel to a seemingly unfollow-uppable first film. Takes everything from ITSV, and amps it up to twenty with a stunning visual style, a sonically fitting soundtrack, and a meta-commentary on the nature of Spider-Man's character and whether they really deserve all the tragedy thrown at them.

Aunty Donna's Coffee Cafe: The guys who made Pud did another show, this time with funding from the Australian Government! While stripped back in its setting, they continue to provide the same stupid bullshit that put me into laughing fits as they did with their Netflix show. Haven't they done well.

Scott Pilgrim Takes Off: I think when people heard about "An animated Scott Pilgrim show with the live-action cast and Edgar Wright producing", they did not expect "A proper dissection of Ramona Flowers' character and her motivations, as well as her own journey of forgiving the Evil Exes. Also lots of yaoi." Scott Pilgrim continues to dominate as the premier "guy learns not to be a shithead" franchise.

Red Hot Chili Peppers - Live in Accor Stadium: The Peppers prove their pertained power as performers by playing the purest psalms in their prospectus from the past 35 years (eugh, what a mouthful). Flea came out, did a 30-second handstand, waved and said hello to the moon and then got up some people littering in the crowd. Their life is more than just a read-through.

Caroline Polachek - Desire, I Want to Turn Into You: I had absolutely no clue who Caroline was before I listened to this album. I now realise that she might just be the person that pop needs right now. A soaring collection of songs destined to become classics down the line, like a greatest hits compilation that doesn't exist. We're all on Caroline's island, and we ain't leaving.

Bomb Rush Cyberfunk: I kept my eye on this game as it was developing, and it was absolutely worth it to see it come through in the end. Satisfying gameplay that requires you to learn how to combo to progress, an addicting artstyle inspired by Y2K, and the soundtrack. Holy fuck the soundtrack. I just can't get enuf.

Weird Al Yankovic - TUROTRSIIIVT: Man, what a title. Emu Phillips come out swinging with jokes I did not expect, and then Weird Al comes out aggressively swinging, with all the songs you don't know him for. He then did a polka melody of his parodies, did a ritual halfway through, and then ended the concert on a high note. Only the best from Strange Alfred.

Doctor Who 2023 Specials: That bastard David Tennant returning led me down the rabbit hole known as watching Doctor Who, and did it ever pay off more than these specials. A trans woman saves the day and the Doctor realises he's bi, black, and needs therapy. A magnificent close on a chapter of one of the greatest sci-fis ever, and a bright step into the future.

The Hyperfixation of the Year award goes to none other than

Homestuck, everyone's favourite webcomic! Everyone's.

And I think that's partly because I joined this website to begin with. I probably say this all the time, but leaving Reddit was probably the best decision I could have made at that time. As much as I reminisce, the communities I was in began to get a little stale. Same jokes, same shitposts, a different day. Tumblr in some strange way, is not that. It feels less like a big communal website and more like a collection of small towns spread across a large spot of land. Calm and village-like, you know?

So to all my mutuals, my followers, to the people that liked and reboggled my stinky posts, to all that offered mealworms and crickets in my askbox, thank you. "Gecko Boy" might just be a silly lil joke in the grand scheme of things, but it's a fun joke to play into.

Whatever comes next year, I know I've got the energy to keep going. Have a good 2024 everybody. <3

I've been thinking about them again (they never stopped thinking about them)

it's been a while of this now but im increasingly frustrated about how difficult i find it these days to share my work and my thoughts. on the one hand it's something im desperate to do because i sincerely love to do it and if i can't share my thoughts and creations then the process doesn't feel complete to me. but on the other hand socmed feels so overexposed that every time i put something out there im so hyperaware that this thing that came from me and is often very close to me is now being dissected by strangers, and as my accounts started being viewed by more than a few hundred people at a time, the probability (and occurrence) increased that within that largely very kind demographic there were also bad actors, or people who insisted on playing devil's advocate, people who wilfully misinterpret, people who accidentally misinterpret but in ways that are frustrating, etc etc etc. that kind of repeated exposure and vulnerability gets exhausting after a while and im quite burnt out on it. i take every measure i can to prevent overexposure to every single passing person's thoughts (not that i don't want to hear from people, i love it, but it's different from seeing the same tags 5000 times by 5000 strangers who don't realise the things they're saying have been said to me already - this is no one's fault) which is why my notifications are off on twitter for people i don't follow etc and of course anon asks are off here, but it's just part of the reality and it's the downside of being lucky enough to have a group of people who are willing to look at what i have to say in the first place. that's something im very grateful for but you know, inevitable ups and downs, and it makes me really cautious about sharing meta and fic in the unreserved way i used to when i was younger

it's sad because again, part of the joy of creation for me is the joy of handing it to others in the hopes someone will find it interesting or it'll make them feel something. feeling like i can't do that without also exposing my flesh to being scratched up and stabbed by strangers is just a little too tiring. even making new quieter accounts doesn't necessarily ease that feeling because it's sort of an instinctive response at this point, the phenomenon you may have noticed where people start trying to cover themselves for potential arguments even bonkers ones that no reasonable person would make (im literally doing it right now). and also again im incredibly privileged to have lucked into finding enough people who give a shit about my silly little jokes that im reticent to give it up or take it for granted, even if it raises the chances of someone nasty latching onto me or being bombarded with exhausting commentary.

ultimately it is worth it to me whenever someone finds something i made worthwhile and especially if someone goes out of their way to tell me something i did meant something to them or made them laugh, so i wouldn't change anything. im very grateful to have that! just feeling low and having a sulk!!!

So I really like going in Tumblr and reading meta about character.

I don't have that much strong opinion on many character. But I do like reading people view on them

But I do say that it seem that fandom has some sort of vendetta against shen jiu.

Like I can read I great meta about multiple character such as SY, SQH, YQy.

And even one like Lbm and LBG

And they vibe check is overall great. The comment and repost are overall possiive. It many funny commentary and amusement. But it was overall ok

But once it comes to sj it seem like everybody just switch their game. Like I don't think there isn't a post out there that hasn't have some user always raging about about how SJ is a abuser and how twists he was as a kid and how he was born evil.

Which just makes me weird, as in my opinion, nobody in svsss is completely virtuous. The all one way or another committed a crime.

Except for maybe NYY, GXY,SXY

Like a can read a meta/analysis about moshang. And the whole replied will be praises, likes and overall good vibes.

But once it comes sj, it will be criticism to the highest degree. Most focusing on how sj is a child abuser

As if killing multiple children (I think it was a 100+) wasn't as bad as that

.

please note that this is a pre-s2 masterpost; new one can be found here.

contrary to popular belief i am actually capable of writing up genuine theories about s2, but they are still wonderfully feral and unhinged in both tone and nature, so voila welcome to ✨rhi's crackpot speculation/meta masterpost✨ featuring some very special guests that are way more insightful and clever than me

note: contains spoilers

d-day edit: lmao let's sort this shitpit out🍲

old post-s2/s3-relevant metas etc but they didn't make it to the final cut of the new masterpost:

BIT NERVOUS about this being linked but fuck it, i didn't like the first two eps INITIALLY but in my defence i learnt the error of my ways and consider it to have been prime's fault

thoughts on s3 in the immediate aftermath

i heard you calling from across the ether for some whump material so i wrote some

also i meta-girlbossed a bit too close to the sun with recontextualising the lion/adam/eve parallels in s1e1 now that we know what we know about aziraphale and crowley pre-fall

someone shared their opinion about the playlists with me then i blacked out and when i came to there was meta

i got big feelings™ about the argument clip in that aziraphale is honestly just a nice man doing his fucking best (not a prediction but just a wee rant)

s2 live commentaries bc im sorry reading these back is GOLD:

episode 1/2 (lumped together bc i went to a screening) (also neil liked this and i feel exposed the poor guy had to read this??? over all the other somewhat intelligent stuff on my blog??? this is what he went for???? man's WILD ✨)

episode 3

episode 4

episode 5

episode 6 (lmao)

and then basically anything else, mostly all pre-s2 so have a read and laugh at me, it's ok honest

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

this one made me tear up a bit because i live on a diet of bagels and aziraphale/crowley biblical whump material LMAO AM I APOLLO????

(as amended) the one where my entire theory on aziraphale and crowley's angst for s2 is predicted based on the length of his ridiculous (see: delicious) sideburns

an earlier musing on the plot of like the first three episodes (fuck it let's be real i'm just blueprinting a fanfic in this post)

by all accounts crowley is not, in fact, james bond

the second coming gets fucked up bc gabriel is a pussy ass bitch

✨✨SDCC/NYC✨✨ people pls read this and talk to me about it bc I'm losing it everyone else just shh and read silently for a minute ill get to you in a sec okay id still love to know what happened at the sdcc screening but i went to my own one in the uk and what i saw has done nothing to dissuade me from this theory im sorry

lol haven't updated this post in a hot minute but this is the SMOOCHY prediction

i told y'all crowley was getting hit by the cozzy livs and now my boy has to work in a pub, liz truss i hope ur happy

if i must suffer then you must suffer also thems the rules

✨✨live feed of my breakdown over the episode titles✨✨

a wee romantic shitpost about ep5 but im adding it in here for posterity bc if this does happen im going to simply decease

this was birthed from the above but with ep2(?) spoiler context

IS GOOB JESUS?????

i have a sinking feeling that crowley may be a double agent and honestly that's not very james bond of him

segue from the above, someone really cleverly came up with the thought after the wanted posters that crowley is involved in hell descending on the bookshop to get gabriel and was rewarded with duke of hell (hence the art of him on a throne) and i latched on like a fucking barnacle

I cry

(also as amended lmao) my rhetoric on how unequipped aziraphale is to handle intense gay panic god bless this mess this lil funky dude

i have now done so many speculation posts about the 40s that it feels like groundhog day but if prime insist on feeding me 40s content then that's their own damn fault (but this one is the most recent and where I'm currently at so read this one first)

(older) a tinfoil hat inspection of anything related to ww2!husbands, magician aziraphale, and the Dinner of '41

(older again) extended-Dinner of '41 analysis in the context of s1e3

once upon a time aziraphale and crowley fucked up the ineffable plan by not getting together in 1941 and god wasn't happy about it and everything went tits up, the end

a simple humble commentary on how the trailer was put together and a warning to not trust a single thing prime tells us

okay it's not s2 related but i had a bit of wine and a small heartbreak over their first meeting in the beginning and now any other method of therapy is redundant

and last but certainly not least (not for the moment anyway, there's a few more feet to descend before we truly scrape the bottom of the unholy barrel that is my psyche) we encounter the deranged, manic, unbalanced and frankly disturbed commentary i birthed in response to The Spoiler

enjoy, my boos ✨

Ranma 1/2 Thoughts, Meta Edition

I have consumed...a lot of Ranma 1/2 content.

I mean, this is kinda what happens when you're a repressed transgirl who discovers the manga a year into a marriage that you got into to "fix" being trans and be "a real boy" in a desperate bid to fill the hole that you wouldn't learn for two decades could only be filled by living as your true self.

I've encountered precisely four (4) types of Ranma 1/2 fans in that time:

Transwomen who see Ranma as their idealized expression of the gender experience ("I'm not like this because I want to be, it's a curse. A curse that gives me a smokin' hot body and HUGE tits! But it's tooootally a curse, for realsies! I'll find a cure any day now, see how hard I'm looking? I'm trying sooooo hard to find a cure...")

Transmen who see Ranma as their perfect representation of their gender experience ("I'm a guy, damnit! This body...it's a curse! I hate it and I want nothing better than to be cured, but all sorts of Life Bullshit keeps getting in the way!")

Lesbians who kin either Ranma (butch NB lesbian) or one of their love interests (Akane - comphet closetted butch lesbian, Shampoo - Strong, smokin' hot bad bitch who goes after what she wants, Ukyo - transmasc coded genderfluid NB)

Completely clueless nimrods who miss the FUCKING POINT and are only into the show for the martial arts and think it would be better if Ranma got cured and they stopped having funny stuff happen.

(In case it's not obvious, IMHO the last group are the worst parts of the fandom and need to Go Away. Most of the toxic stuff that exists in R.5 fanspaces is because of this group of assholes which includes the incels that think everything would be better if Ranma just did stuff that's questionable from an ethics and morality perspective and chased after Shampoo because she's the closest thing to a Barbie-doll these closet fascists can allow themselves to fantasize about playing with, completely ignoring that she's a complex character that's a subversive pastiche to the Japanese racist stereotypes of the 1980s.)

I'm not kidding when I say that in the early days of the public Internet (before Facebook and Twitter ruined it for everyone), Ranma 1/2 was the SINGLE largest fandom by a MASSIVE stretch. I once checked my math on this by going to Fanfiction.net (before the massive purges) and brought up the Big List of All Fandoms and right there at the top with a MASSIVE number of fics was Ranma 1/2 by a HUGE margin. It took three fandoms (Star Trek, Doctor Who, and I believe Naruto if I'm recalling correctly) to have their combined total number of fics exceed the number of R.5 fics on FF.net...and that was JUST FF.net. There was an entire separate index (The Penultimate Ranma 1/2 Fanfic Index) that had the single task of listing, not even curating or reading or reviewing, ONLY Ranma 1/2 fanfics. Not fanart, not commentary, no RP blogs or chat transcripts or whatever, JUST fanfics. And only about half of those linked to FF.net, meaning that if you dig up the archives you'll find at least 60% of all fanfics that people had managed to index in the Ranma 1/2 fandom are missing because they were never properly archived and just...faded from the Internet as the public servers and places like Geocities started disappearing. You can find teasing, tantalizing hints of larger works that all we have left, like scraps of ancient papyri revealing a quote from a missing book of the Bible, are single chapters backed up on niche sites that managed to get spider-crawled by Archive.org, but many great works are just...lost. (There's an ero fic called "Playing with Water" that was SUPER hot and featured elements that we have tags for on porn sites but didn't really have proper words for back in the day...but even back when it was first being written finding the thing was hard...and today? Nearly impossible.)

(If you wonder why I'm such an absolute RABID advocate of AO3, this is why)

For me, Ranma will always be the transfemme coded genderfluid hero that we needed in the late 80s and early 90s. We were on the tail end of the AIDS pandemic, and just like COVID-19 there were a bunch of assholes who used it to ride to power and marginalize queer folk. It was easier to do with AIDS, of course, given the absolutely massive numbers of queer cis men and transwomen who contracted it and died. (Sidebar: the reason "L" comes first in "LGBTQIA+" is because it was the Lesbian nurses who were the caretakers of the Gay men who were dying in numbers large enough to be counted as a tragic statistic instead of a mere tragedy) and while the world was starting to acknowledge (again) that gay men was a thing that existed and they weren't actually trying to corrupt the youth, what we now call "transgender" was still listed in the DSM as a mental disorder that required treatment to "cure." According to the cultural majority in damn near every field you can imagine, the Gender Binary was the only way to exist and if you didn't fit neatly into one or the other then you were Damaged™ and had to be Fixed™ for The Good of All People™ (but specifically so cis-het-white folks, usually men, could feel comfy and not be confronted by things that made them feel icky and might have cooties). It's a truism that's treated as a joke that transwomen get into coding and wind up doing IT work in such massive numbers that between us and the furries we ARE the foundation of the modern Internet. And into the fanspaces packed to the brim with closetted AMAB transwomen who hadn't yet had their egg cracked came this plucky martial artist that gets to swap their gender with a splash of water but somehow still winds up the best of the best, the finest martial artist of their generation. (Goku can suck it, Ranma would turn the Kamea-meha right back on the over-muscled, braindead loser with a food fetish and still make it home in time for Kasumi's dinner)

I'm no sociologist, anthropologist, behaviorist, whatever, but I suspect that the reason Ranma Saotome spawned such a large fanbase so early in the modern Internet's history was specifically because the series created a safe space where people could talk about gender issues with a degree of separation that helped strip away the stigma surrounding feeling like you were in the wrong body.

I get why people like the martial arts aspect. I mean, Ranma kills a demigod. This is NOT something to sneeze at. I also understand the transmen who latch onto Ranma as a kin because I get the feeling like you have no control over what your body's doing and you're going through your days in existential dread of what might be dragging you further and further away from what you always knew was right and correct about yourself. It's a terrifying thing and here's someone who (esp. the anime version) IS a guy trapped in a girl's body.

For me, though, and for a LOT of transwomen out there, Ranma is transfemme. And, yes, canonically Ranma states right near the end of the manga that they're both and they kinda forgot about the 'cure' when they had to pick between that and the really important stuff and that they're okay with being fluid ('cause water, gettit?!) about their gender and it's a damn shame this was the 80s 'cause a continuation might wind up showing Ranma embracing being both...

BUT, and this is a transfemme thing, I know, if you continue the parabolic arc of Ranma's character development, the logical conclusion (for us) is that she eventually decides that she's a woman and just lives in her "cursed" form the majority (or all) of the time.

And yes, this is because that's the transfemme story arc. In the manga in some distant part of the multiverse that peers into our universe and for some reason decides to make me the MC (god, that must be a FUCKING BORING manga by our standards, I weep for those fans), my story arc is the gradual progression of uncracked, closetted transgirl to transitioned out and proud transbien mom. At one point I swapped back and forth between gender presentations because it was safer for me to appear in some spaces as the male that they thought I was. Now I would prefer to die before being forced to go back to pretending to be a man again.

Ranma has the choice, and good for them. Until the Kaisufuu is permanently destroyed, even if the "curse" is locked, they have the option of going one way or the other based solely on their own, personal desire. I can't say I'd be comfortable with that option being available. In that theoretical manga where there's a reboot that gives me a condition like Ranma's, I'd probably wind up destroying the equivalent to the Kaisufuu just because of the threat to my mental wellbeing it presents.

So it's not a stretch to imagine Ranma making the same choice. She's a woman now, she has the life she never realized she wanted because she never had the choice so didn't know she was allowed to imagine it, but now she's happier than ever and why would she ever go back to that struggle of being a guy that only ever brought her pain and challenges and heartache?

DEFENDING NPMD

Time to defend nerdy prudes must die to some of you for not appreciating the utter masterpiece it is as my current hyperfixation.

"These teens aren't realistic they're caricatures" - Sure that could easily be true, and say it is true then it's a high school piece based on cliques/stereotypes that people don't necessarily fit into in reality? That doesn't make it bad, heathers and mean girls are classics at this point. But also I was 3 of these people in secondary. I had an anime phase and I was friends with weebs, they act exactly like richie, like...I told so many people "Believe It!" with a thumbs up. I even played a naruto song to classmates and talked about how he was my idol as a 13 year old...I cringe about that to this day but it's a REAL PHASE. Then we have Ruth who is so horny and desperate for love...literally my teenage life are you kidding? Especially with the theatre reenactments thinking I could do things if I didn't get anxious like...poor girl. I'd like to think I was Peter at one point, I have low blood sugar and like pokemon cards and got decent grades and had a bit of a need to prove myself? But I was probably closer to Grace like ya boi has religious suppressions but I'm catholic so clearly not a person of faith in Grace's eyes haha.

"There's too many rhymes - class of twenty twenty worn"

I think this was intentional? Well not really but also like it makes sense, Jeff said the reason for the snapping being wrong in bully the bully is because they're nerds and that's uncool in jazz which kinda leads me to believe this theory. Also the original lyric was "There's no way to fix the class of 2026" but had to change cause year. One of the songs that doesn't rhyme obsessively is "The Summoning" which is sang primarily by the lords in black as opposed to the high school kids. Now, I don't want to offend anyone but high schoolers are idiots. Everyone is an idiot but high schoolers tend to be egotistical idiots. My theory is the rhyming is sort of a meta commentary of the ages of these characters, believing that things should be rhyming because that's what they've been taught. It keeps the norm of the school also, it shows it fits the standard representation of schools in media and then symbolises this through the representation of a standard song. Whereas the lords in black have some off lyrics, off rhymes, especially here: "Nibbly wants a sacrifice And Wiggly wants his wrath We dancе around the pentagram And take all our kingdoms back" It doesn't fit the other rhymes that happen earlier on sang by the high schoolers. This could represent the lords in black are interfering with the norm, they're older and wiser and follow their own rules. "But screech what about hatchet town" they don't have the same power as the lords in black, the chaos and paranoia is getting to them but there is still more off rhymes than in others. "What are off rhymes what are you doing" A rhyme is like fart and smart. An off-rhyme is like fart "monster" and "Gone sir" it doesn't entirely rhyme but it has that feeling. There's probably a lot more fascinating things that you can get into with this "BUUUT Heathers did it without them sounding so cheesy and unaware" my answer to that is, heathers is fILLED WITH EMOS. Have you spoken to an emo? They'll go like "Even the roaring waves of the sea cannot mimic the immense drowning I feel by my emotions" like dude chill. NPMD doesn't have emos in it really...Everyone is really happy considering the situation.

"Who says cool beans anymore?" - This is the funniest criticism to me like, do you think Grace Chasity is supposed to represent a modern day view? She's the one who says it first! "Shoot and shinola", "tickle on my mommy spot" all that is fine by you but cool beans is outdated??? "But why do the others join herrr" ok well the obvious reason there is they're INSIDE A HAUNTED HOUSE WITH SOMEONE WHO IS VERY SUS AND THEIR WORST BULLY IS COMING AND ALSO GRACE IS THE ONLY ONE WITH THE KEY LIKE I WOULD JUST GO WITH THAT. But if not, nerds quote outdated memes all the time. "Excellent" reminded me of naruto the abridged series, like that's from 2008 but im still there. Or like the phandom are still simping for glabellas and onomatopoeic microwaves. The starkid fandom would never reference an old musical, the medallion said that was dumb so we're not doing that...wait Most valid stuff I've seen is about steph's characterisation which I can do a whole post about like mariah is phenomenal as always but there's a lot of telling not showing.

Also I'm back into starkid