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greazyfloz · 1 year

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Luke walking in on you and Jack doing the deed when he was younger and still is traumatised but uses it for blackmail

Slight Smut w/ Jack Hughes

Trauma

Flashback:

During COVID lockdown, I decided to join the Hughes family as I didn’t really want to spend that long away from my boyfriend. In the beginning we were always hanging out with everyone in the house trying to keep busy so time would pass. Some restrictions were lifted around June, just in time for lake house season so it was nice that the boys could have some friends over or go golfing because they were starting to get at eachothers throats.

One day, Jack and I were lounging by the pool watching his brothers and parents go out for a boat ride when Jack looked over at me. “We should have sex” he says suddenly

“So subtle” I say laughing

“I’m serious, no one is home and we haven’t really been able to in a long time” he says leaning over to my lounge chair kissing my lips.

“There isn’t any sheets on your bed Jack” I say pushing him away reminding him that they are in the wash

“We will find another bed” he says, grabbing my hand.

I roll my eyes as he stands me up and bends don’t so I’d jump on his back up. He piggy backed me up the stairs and into his older brother's room before plopping me down on the bed. “Absolutely not!” I say sitting up from Quinn’s bed.

“He will never know!” he chuckles

“He will seriously beat your ass if he ever does find out you know?!” I say as I take my bikini top off, throwing it to the side.

“Stop worrying” he says, placing a kiss on my lips that soon turns into a makeout session. It gets deeper and deeper as Jack reaches down and pushes my bikini bottoms to the side, entering a finger inside of me pumping it in and out of me as I let out a whimper. He takes his fingers out and lifts me slightly so I am up right on the bed and he crawls on top of me as he reaches back down to continue. I then reach down and massage the growing bulge in his shorts before we hear someone

“OH MY GOD!” we hear Luke yell out. Jack springs himself off of me and I grab my exposed chest. “I- uh- Quinn needs- he asked me-” he says covering his eyes. Jack bends down grabbing my bikini top and throws it over to me. “Forget it, I’ll just tell him-”

“NO” Jack and I both yell at the same time. I quickly cover myself again and Jack looks back at me before saying “No, come here”

“I’d feel more comfortable out here” Luke says in the hall on his way back down the stairs. Jack sprints out the door.

“Where you going? I thought you guys where on the boat?” Jack asks a very traumitized 16 year old boy.

“Yeah but Quinn forgot his sunglasses” he says

“Y/n! Grab Quinn’s sunglasses!” I hear from downstairs so I grab them and come down

“Please don’t tell Quinn” Jack says, “He will beat my ass” he repeats what I told him to his brother.

“Fine” he says grabbing the glasses from my hands, “but you owe me”

It took awhile for Luke to be less awkward with me and especially in summer in a bikini, didn’t make things easier. As time went by Luke would always blackmail Jack to get his way, “I wonder what Quinn would think if I told him about something I saw in his bedroom” he would always say before getting his way.

It was two years later and we were out on the boat with Luke, Quinn, Blanks, and Duker. When Jack and Luke started arguing about something related to wakeboarding.

“I only got to go like twice today” Luke says as we made our way back home

“Okay well maybe next time you will go more” Jack says as he drive the boat

“Why are you in such a hurry to get back?” Luke says tauntingly. I have hear this tone before so I speak up

“Let him go again” I say and Jack gives me a weird look

“See even Y/n wants me to go again” Luke says. Jack doesn’t budge. Jack doesn’t think that Luke would say anything in front of Duker or Blanks because he would be too awkward but he was wrong.

“Quinn, drive the boat” Luke says, and Quinn shakes his head no. “Why are you siding with Jack? He is probably rushing home so he can have sex with Y/n in your bed again”. It went silent and Quinn stares deep into Jack’s back before speaking up

“What the fuck?!” Quinn says, looking at Jack in the rearview mirror then to me.

“It was two years ago Quinn” Jack says almost like he is over this shit. Luke explains what happened and Quinn shakes his head then says “ew”. I look away awkwardly before Blanks and Duker start laughing.

“I mean beat my ass if you want but he’s the one that didn’t tell you for two years” Jack says laughing along with the other two boys. Soon Quinn becomes more annoyed with Luke than Jack and I.

“That backfired” Jack says to Luke as we all make our way off the boat

“Yeah, well wait till I tell mom and dad” Luke says

#jack hughes #nhl writing #nhl smut #nhl imagine #nhl fanfiction #nhl fic #hockey imagines

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ask-whitepearl-and-steven · 1 year

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I've always been curious. How much does the English curriculum focus on reading and comprehension compared to analysis of literature in non-English speaking countries? I imagine it's not until the last few years of school that things like Shakespeare are even remotely considered something worth teaching.

How do I answer this without turning it into a TEDtalk...

SO.

The QUICK answer is: It depends.

It depends on the country. It depends on the school. It depends on the curriculum.

I'm afraid you've fallen into the hole called 'non-English speaking countries' - and referring to them under a single umbrella... when in reality, the curriculum of, say, Japan's EFL education and Norway's EFL education are WILDLY different. Hell, even the Philippines and Japan are more different than you might suspect.

Personally, as someone who has taught English as a Foreign Language in high school in Japan (albeit briefly, it was a one-year contract to fill in for another teacher who left the position due to COVID stuff, most of the time I'm an Elementary School teacher), I can tell you that 99% of the high schools in Japan will not have Shakespeare ANYWHERE on their curriculum. Most people in Japan will never run across Shakespeare unless they take a specialized class... probably IN UNIVERSITY.

Shakespeare is a difficult, antiquated form of English. It does not appear on any standardized testing. Why would anyone except native speakers take the time to learn it?

The LONGER answer is:

Students in English-speaking countries enter school knowing how to speak English.

I know there's a tendency to think of 6 year olds as these dum-dums who say things like 'I goed school' but anyone who has actively spent more than 10 minutes around a first grader will know that, barring developmental difficulties and learning disabilities, they actually speak using full sentences and correct grammar 99% of the time.

Schools in areas where English is already spoken natively can focus on:

spelling (oh gods English spelling is a fucking mess, I'm so sorry children I am SO sorry)

punctuation (spoken language doesn't have punctuation, so we have to teach kids to convert pauses and concepts into commas and sentence breaks)

written format (and various ways to apply it in different situations)

literature (famous books, novels, stories which are considered a good serving platter of concepts like analysis and metaphor and other tools we use to make written communication effective and interesting)

Schools in areas where English is NOT spoken must FIRST focus on:

Words (they must memorize on average 2000 to have a basic understanding down)

Pronunciation (each language has different sounds, and English has a LOT of weird sounds that many foreign speakers don't know how to produce... and it takes practice)

Basic grammar (Thing goes first. Doing-action-word goes next. Thing-that-has-action-done-to-it usually goes after that. Sometimes we have a time word that goes-- oh god how do you explain this to an 11 year old oh god)

Maybe spelling by the end of elementary school (my 5th graders only know how to write basic 3-4 letter words)

Basic reading, grammar and punctuation by the end of middle school, along with basic conversational skills

Ability to write a whole sentence, maybe a paragraph, by the time they finish middle school

High school is basically just reviewing more complex grammar because holy fuck is there a lot of it

Shakespeare? Who the FUCK has time for that?! These kids are still struggling to understand how a gerund works!

Things that native English speakers know on instinct, like the fact that this is a weird sentence:

the red big dog sits on the car

(vs the big red dog sits in the car)

...must be taught, little by little, to non-native English speakers, which takes TIME TIME TIME.

So next time you meet someone who speaks English as a second language - I need you to be kind to them. I need you to be thoughtful. And I need you to be thankful you were able to learn all these crazy ass grammar rules and spelling when you were still a young child and your brain was silly-putty in the shape of a vacuum that sucked up vocabulary.

.............fuck ᵗʰᵃⁿᵏˢ ᶠᵒʳ ᶜᵒᵐᶦⁿᵍ ᵗᵒ ᵐʸ ᵀᴱᴰᵗᵃˡᵏ

#chekhov answers

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stawpny · 7 months

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more ny/ca hc’s, as another treat for you heathens

- I feel like Yorks that type of guy who would give cal his umbrella like if it was pouring in NYC, since I’ve heard it doesn’t rain in California. He would just stand there, watching Cal be obsessed with this city while he’s fucking drenched, but who cares? If Cal’s happy then he’s mildly content. He’s a wet angry cat in NYC.

-New York used to sit in the Northeast area between Mass and Jersey, but ever since he’s fell in love with the golden boy, he sits right next to him. He had to kick Oregon out of the seat though, and also forced everyone to move over a chair. Cal was clueless.

-York loves sitting ontop of skyscrapers in NYC. He finds it calm and peaceful up there. Cal, not so much. He just usually plays with the pigeons that nest up there to calm his nerves.

-I deadass believe York feeds the pigeons, and when they all flock up around him, eating all of the food, he just snatches one and adds it to his collection. Rats too.

-this adorable mf can only sleep with Cal by his side or he will panic and stay up the whole night. He needs his glowing golden boy, his nightlight 😭.

-Cal calls York when he misses him, and york always answers to reassure him that he could live without him. Cal gets upset and says it’s not true, hangs up the phone out of anger, then totally forget about the situation and call him back to say he misses him again. Cycle repeats.

-York smiles every time Cal does something stupid. Not a smirk, nor a grin, a full blown smile, which is weird for him. Don’t tell York that Cal sometimes does it on purpose to make his partner smile and laugh.

-(not CA/NY) I swear Gov has a board for each and everyone of the states that have OLD pictures of them and adds the most recent one and the oldest one. He changes it every time they get a new look.

-California is a helicopter mom. New Yorks like that dad who is there for you but doesn’t give a shit what you do outside. He might even join you.

Songs I think represent this ship:

Somethin’ Stupid by Frank Sinatra (Both)

Delicate by Taylor Swift (both)

From the Start by Laufey (CA pov)

Hell N Back by Bakar (I can’t decide)

VALENTINE BY LAUFEY (THIS ONE) (NY pov cause he’s new to this kinda stuff)

Paper Rings by Taylor Swift (CA POV)

Mastermind by Taylor Swift (NY POV)

Wonderland by Taylor Swift (both maybe)

Maroon/Paris also by Taylor Swift (I don’t know honestly 😭)

—

they’re so silly

I had to stop with the songs there or I would start connecting songs to them even if it was only one lyric that sounded like them in that song

im sick rn.

I was forced to take a covid test and I now have Covid?? I dunno the test expired in February 😭

anyways, I hope u liked them

ILY byeee!!

#wttt new york #wttsh #welcome to the statehouse #wttsh new york #wttt headcanons #wttt california #wttt shipping #wttsh headcanons #wttt #wttt gov #wttsh gov #wttt caliyork #the sillies are back ⁉️⁉️

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mochalottie · 11 months

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HAPPY NEARLY SIX MONTH BIRTHDAY TO MY BRAIN CHILD!!

Oel Ngati Kameie my beautiful little series, my first foray into Spider's character. I wrote it after my second viewing of Way of Water (which might also get a live blogging session when it comes out on Disney+) and at the time, I had no motivation or inspiration to write cause Covid hit hard guys.

So my tiny little brain decided one night to think, what if Spider got hurt worse in his fall from the tree at the beginning of the film? Cause there's no way he would've come out of that unscathed. And the next morning I started, and that evening finished the first part, which clocked in at 6k words. I posted it thinking it wouldn't get much interaction because Spider didn't even have a proper character tag at the time, and then suddenly I checked back, and it had brought in almost 1000 hits and about 12 comments in three hours.

Granted, to some people with major stories who get way more than that in one day, it is a small number. But, to me this was huge. I was coming from getting maybe a few hundred hits in a month, and maybe 5 comments on my works because they were so niche (my ideas are weird, okay? I wrote an Alice in Wonderland AU for Zukka I'm that strange).

So to have a series blow up that much, was such a privilage and a confidence boost. And just at the time where Spider and the kids were getting popular. You guys don't know how starved I was for content literally months ago. It makes me feel not quite old by aged thinking about how there were literally ten stories about Spider and one of them was mine XD

So to my (admittedly not small) first foray into the world of writing Avatar, happy six month birthday. And to anyone who has read the whole of this post (which wow dedication) THANK YOU!!! <333

also to those newbies who have found me because of Our hearts Or For the Nights here's a link to check it out. i gave Spider an Avatar and a family it's pretty cool.

tags (can i tag with this sort of post?? XD): @be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie - biggest supporter, @wafflesrisa - bestie I hadn't even realised you commented on part of it i gasped so hard.

#oel ngati kameie #spider socorro #avatar the way of water #sully family #avatar spider #i wrote the whole series in little over a week which is wild to me #like that's 37000 words in ten days #absolutely wild #writers on tumblr #lottie writes fanfic

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divineerdrick · 1 month

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Adepticon Reveals for March 21, 2024

I've almost recovered from COVID, so I'm going to actually watch the livestream for Adepticon and catch the reveals! Whoot!

Before we start, let's try and make some predictions. First, the easy one. We're probably going to get the reveal for Age of Sigmar 4th Edition, though they'll probably just call it the next edition. Everyone's calling this one, since we're currently wrapping up this edition's narrative campaign and GW seems determined to keep to their 3 year cycles. It's practically a gimme.

We know we're only getting teasers for Heresy and Necromunda, so I don't have much to say there. For 40K, we're probably going to see something Chaos. I'm not exactly sure where we are on the roadmap, but that teaser definitely feels like Chaos. I don't think they'll reveal our mystery Codex just yet, but I'm ready to be wrong there.

For Warcry I'm guessing we'll be getting a new box announced. Same for Kill Team, though I don't think we've seen all the previously announced boxes released yet. I'm betting we'll see something similar for Old World, since they seem to be bringing armies back a box at a time. They've been talking green skins, so maybe they'll show us a full box set for them.

For Underworlds I'm going to go a bit further. They'd mentioned new ways to play some older war bands, so I'm guessing they'll be announcing some new rules or expansions to breathe some life into older Underworlds sets.

With those predictions pinned for me to suffer or celebrate, on to the show!

IMMORTALITY IS A CURSE

That's the heading we're beginning the show with. Okay then!

Just Lewis today, then? Okay! Hello, Lewis! What you got for us?

Okay! So they're going to have various presenters talking to people to do the reveals. That's new! Let's see how it works out.

Yep. Those are some spikey boys.

Dread Talons! Oh hey! We've got the Chaos Lord with Jump Pack back! Definitely some new sculpts there. After the show, I'll go through the articles and take a look at what exactly is new.

We got Nick and Simon for this part of the reveal! They definitely look like they're ready to have some fun! Oh! And we've got both Stu and Josh today!

Oh wow! We're getting two new CSM battle forces! Interesting!

Mentioning Vashtorr, I hope he gets a bit of a glow up. I really like him, and it would be nice if he got rules that make him feel like he the Lord of the Soul Forges.

They're announcing eight detachments for CSM. Couldn't let the slaves of the corpse emperor have all the detachment fun! This is definitely going to be a sticking point considering Tau players just got their hands on their codex and it only has four. While I'd prefer fewer, more well balanced detachments, the way GW has been dishing them out to each faction is kinda weird. I'm expecting to hear some grumblings about this.

Okay, so they're trying to go for kind of an interview style feel to this presentation. But it's feeling very scripted. Like . . . really scripted. WarCom's purpose has always been to be the hype train for GW. But even with the obvious restrictions on how they'd interact with chat, there still felt like there was a little bit of genuine interaction. This feels very phony to me. Not sure I like this new way of doing presentations.

And, of course, they're suggesting all the CSM fans should run out to grab both boxes. I'm curious how this will turn out. On the one hand, this will allow someone still collecting their army to pick the box they think will serve them best. On the other, that's even more FOMO boxes coming out. And again, can't help but note that Tau only got Kroot in their box, so Tau players that wanted to actually play Tau didn't get served very well. But CSM is getting quite the spread it seems.

Wow! Even the way that cut off felt abrupt and forced. Geh. Really not liking this so far . . .

So apparently that's not it for 40K. They really want all the 40K fans to stick through the entire show and maybe find something they like from the other systems. For now, it's time to visit the Mortal Realms. Don't think it's AoS yet, but let's see what we get.

It's Warcry! And it's a new boxed set! Looks like an Osiarch warband verses an Idoneth warband! Those are gonna be some interesting miniatures! Of course we already saw those new hounds teased.

Just Nick and John this time.

Oh! I was wrong! Looks like it's Sylvaneth, not Idoneth. I got a more Idoneth feel, but these look like they're both oddballs for their factions. The Osiarch warbands are exiles. And the Sylvaneth have been infected in some way.

Warcry isn't going to smaller box sets yet it seems. This boxset will contain both warbands and the terrain.

Oh! Moving right on to Underworlds it seems! Let's see what's up!

Underworlds often gets the craziest warbands. We've got a Death warband, and I think a Chaos warband? It's honestly hard to tell, they've got kind of a torture asylum kinda vibe to them.

So this is our new box and season. Oh well. Maybe there will be more, but it was a swing for the fences prediction.

So our Death warband is Flesheater courts. The delusion for this band is that they're all gourmet chefs getting ingredients for their lavish banquets. Yum!

The Brotherhood of the Bolt are crazy flagellants that have at some point been struck by lightning. And so they believe they've been chosen by Sigmar! Like I said, Underworld warbands are fantastic.

Now we're back to get a little bit more build up for the full AoS reveal. What could it be?

Oh! Getting teased by some Chaos boys! This dude looks badass!

Looks like Cities of Sigmar verses Slaves to Darkness.

Oh! Dudette! Abraxia, Spear of the Everchosen! Really awesome model with some really cool lore behind her.

From here, we're moving on to the next chapter of the Dawnbringers. I'm not caught up on this lore, so I can't comment much here. As I keep watching and listening though, I can't help but be reminded of how well the AoS lore has developed. I really loved my read of the Dominion book and of Morathi. There just isn't enough space in my life for both setting and systems to receive equal attention.

Teaser time!

Dune. Arrakis. Desert Planet.

Oo! Something Mechanicum this way comes!

The little post teaser chat has me thinking this is Mars and that we might be doing something with the war there. It would be nice to get a campaign for the Martian Schism with rules for both Mechanicum and Dark Mechanicum forces.

And now Dwarves! Looks like they'll be getting our next Old World box set! Dwarf players rejoice! Most of these are looking like older sculpts still, though I think that one champion might be new.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's a new Dwarven champion. And he looks awesome! We're also getting a new Dwarf King that can be fielded either on Shield Bearers or on foot.

Oh! I see GSC!

Yes! I'm finally getting my GSC kill team! And they'll be up against an all new Votann Kill Team! Unfortunately, it doesn't look like my Kill Team is all new miniatures, as we've got part of the Broodcoven here. I was kinda hoping for something more bespoke. It's not like we've got a large variety of units.

Votann, on the other hand, definitely needs new units. So I'm glad they're getting some much needed love. These are Hernkyn Jagers, and are part of the advance forces for the Leagues.

Rotlock Negotiation! Heh!

"Anyone else want to negotiate?" "Wh-wh-where did he learn to negotiate like that?" "I wonder . . ."

Oh! It's specifically a Brood Brother Kill Team! Veteran Brood Brothers! Very nice! Looks like it is at least a little bespoke!

And I think this is our Necromunda teaser. Hah! Well that was quick!

Alright! Time for that "just one more thing."

Got quite the badass taking on some Tzangors! Oof! Really intense depiction of how harrowing being a Stormcast must actually be!

Woah!

That's one way for the Skaven to begin their assault! Bloody 'ell!

And yeah, they're just calling it New AoS, the New Edition. We can count guys! You realize we're only up to 4, right? There are Orks that can count to 4!

Alright! We're going to get into rules here! It sound like we're getting a full, proper Edition change along the lines of 40K 2nd to 3rd, 7th to 8th, or 9th to 10th. Wonder if they're going to try what they did for 10th and give us some free rules.

"Opening up the game to more players than ever."

. . .

Guys. You realize that AoS was already the simpler system, right? How much more simple are you going to go? I'm okay with streamlining, but you can go too far. There are parts with 10th Edition 40k where I feel you slimmed down too much. While I do think there is potential fat to trim in AoS, there's some things they slimmed down in 10th I don't want to see happen here. For example, I don't want to see AoS go to a 10th Edition style Enhancement system. They went to lean with that system, and I hope they expand it in future editions. Kitting out your heroes is an integral part of any fantasy setting. You can't do that if you've only got three Enhancements for your entire army!

He's literally using the same language Stu used for 10th Edition. I'm all but waiting for him to say "Simplified, not simple."

But! One thing I think AoS could use, is something like Combat Patrol. If they took the Vanguards and made them standalone buy and play armies, that would be good! I'm hoping that's more how they're planning to get newer players in, not by greatly "streamlining" the game.

D'oh! Combat range is gone. I know one AoS fan in particular that's not going to be happy about that. That was such an elegant way to do different size weapons without Rank and File. Oh boy, this is turning into my anti-hype . . .

Oh! Here we go! Spearhead looks to be the AoS version of Combat Patrol. There's the claim from 10th, that it will be the most balanced game. We saw how well that worked . . . I'm trying not to be down since this is still good. But I hate hearing the same marketing hype that we already saw fail to play out.

We're getting more USRs, so that's definitely good. I'm a big fan there!

Okay, there's another one they claimed for 10th that I please, please, PLEASE want them to actually have followed through on! Stu had talked about how in 10th they tried to make it so that when you look at unit, you know roughly what to expect from that. But 10th just has no consistency as to how strong or tough weapons or models are. I'm really hoping that when Ben says they lined models up and tried to assign stats to them, they really actually did it.

Okay! They're doing free rules at launch. That definitely helps things!

And with that, that's the end of our reveals. And we're back to that banner, "Immortality is a Curse." Which is incidentally, one of the reasons why corporations suck!

Final Thoughts

Okay, my initial plan is that I was going to go through the reveal show, and then take a closer look at miniatures. But I think I'm going to make that a Part 2, since I'm seriously running out of gas. The 4E reveal really didn't help.

What is it with fantasy settings and fourth editions?

I'm trying not to be to anti-hyped by this. There were cool things in this reveal show. Let me TL;DR my sticking points.

I don't like this new style of presentation. It's too staged and controlled and there's no opportunity to get more information or clarifications live.

Two FOMO boxes for CSM is maybe too much. On the one hand, I like the idea of having more purchase options. On the other, I can't help but feel this is them seeing if they can sell more big boxes.

Eight Detachments for Chaos. Fluffy, and puts them on par with the divergent Space Marine chapters, but also makes anyone who got five, or even only four detachments feel even poorer.

They're selling the Broodcoven again! Did they just make way too many of these? Chances are if you play GSC, you've already got this. It greatly reduces the value on this box set. I hope we can get those Veteran Brood Brothers by themselves.

All those selling points for 4E are the same ones we got for 10th. And they really failed to deliver on them. That doesn't mean they won't succeed with AoS. But taking weapon ranges away is a bad start.

Other than that, those were some great reveals with great miniatures! Abraxia looks absolutely sick! We've got Mechanicum teasers for Horus Heresy! Dwarves are one of my favorite classic Warhammer armies! And the new warbands for Warcry and Underworlds are all awesome!

I hope we get real livestreams back. I hope those boxes are just what CSM players needed. I hope they do more with the detachments in the future to bring more balance and parity. I hope I can get those Veteran Brood Brothers sooner rather than later. And I dearly hope that all my fears for Age of Sigmar 4th aren't justified.

I'm gonna try and catch the livestream for Grinding Gear Games tomorrow, so I'm gonna go to bed for now. I'll try to spend some time drinking in the cool minis sometime this weekend.

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tiredfoxtf · 20 days

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Small analysis on DR murder mystery no one asked for but I wrote it anyway!

Danganronpa! A colourful series of murder mysteries with a pink tint of blood. The last addition to the series – Danganonpa V3: Killing Harmony – has been around for 7 years now and that makes me automatically feel so old, but hey what’s worse than that is to think that 2019 was 5 years ago now. It’s been half a decade since the start of COVID epidemic and that alone would make someone sick. And during these years I found myself in and out of Danganronpa fandom spaces. Specifically a Fan Danganropa fan spaces, the inception goes crazy on this one. I am a big enthusiast of taking the Danganronpa’s core ideas and shaping them into something new. I don’t really go into actual canonical Danganronpa fandom, because, well, it's a completely different can of worms that I really do not want to deal with. I've had enough discourse these past 5 years in MCYT fandom and am really tired. But that’s a side tangent.

What we are actually here today is to take a peek at what makes the most intriguing part of any Danganronpa game tick – the murder mystery. And as a side hustle we can take a peek on how different characters affect it. And just maybe a structure of the plot itself. (spoilers for mainline dr games ahead)

So, first thing first let’s look at the way a chapter in the main line Danganronpa game is structured, something you guys know very well.

DAILY LIFE

First we have a Daily Life. On the first glance you might think – “What Daily Life has to do with a murder mystery aspect of the mainline game? Isn’t it supposed to be a peaceful time with no murder?”. And on the surface you are right. But Daily Life serves many purposes for the Murder Mystery: Environment, Motive and Social Interaction.

Firstly, set up of the environment. Like props on the stage, rooms and layout of the building or other environment that is introduced in Daily Life will affect the murder in some way. It’s basically Chechov’s Arsenal we’re talking about. If there’s a gun in the first act, it must be shot by the end of the third and if there’s a garbage compactor in the Daily Life it must be used in a murder. Of course as we progress down the chapters and the area of the Killing Game’s grounds grow bigger it gets harder to just keep in mind what happened when and what rooms have what. And mainline DR games really suffer from “we used this room once in one chapter and forgot about it” disease. But in defence of the games, the area they work with is usually so unbelievably huge (especially suffers SDR2). I really don’t blame them for not utilising stuff from previous chapters in new ones.

But also it’s what is really easy to fix for us, the murder mystery and DR enthusiasts, in our own Danganronpa-like stories. All that needs to be done is to shrink the scale a notch. Instead of opening up a whole new section of buildings or new floors every new chapter, it’s worth opening up a few rooms. It’s also important, listen to me, it’s very important that every new room that is opened is unique in some way. You should not be able to replace it with a room from the previous chapters and you should not be able just get rid of it without significantly changing the plot! It shouldn’t be just a prop that characters alternatively hang out in. This one gets really bad in V3 with the Ultimate Research Labs – most of the labs were not really special and not used at all, which is a pity.

The second thing which is provided to us by Daily Life is a motive. Motive is a really broad term for any event that was planned by the Mastermind or organiser of the Killing Game. It can be Practically anything, but what’s important to keep in mind is that it’s something that someone who Wants murder to happen made. It’s basically a stimuli for a murder however it might present.

Some of the cannon motives in Danganronpa, especially in the very first game, are very trivial, while the others are kinda weird. In the THH it was the very point that Junko was making – the Ultimates, so called symbols of hope, will actually abandon morals like any other person for such trivial reasons like secrets and money. In SDR2 and V3 they just kinda decided to get crazy with them. The infamous Despair Disease and that Virtual Reality thingy or even the First Blood perk. Because, well, Ultimately both of the games’ Masterminds didn’t have anything to prove with them. One existed to just simply send players into a state of Despair again and the other was a TV show for fun.

Which leads to this interesting point – the Motives of your Danganronpa-like story should reflect the Mastermind’s ambition or their own motive for making a Killing Game. Also, personally I think it would be nice if every motive was related to the main theme of your story. Since the Mastermind tries to prove something to the cast to “win” over them, the protagonist usually symbolises the opposite idea (ex. Makoto “Hope” vs. Junko “Despair”; Hajime “Future” vs. Izuru & Junko “Past”; Shuichi “Truth” vs. Tsumugi “Lie”), so it would be a great chance to show how Mastermind thinks and how cast and specifically the Protagonist overcomes the motive from the other side of the ideological spectrum. And it works to show the grey area of the spectrum too, but it’s way deeper into themes than into murder mystery itself.

And the final third part that presents in the Daily Life I eloquently named “Social Events”. To clarify, I do not mean like Free Time Events, no. I mean Major Events that were organised by the cast that played into the murder. A lot of people caught on to the importance of this one element of Daily Life, but got stuck on the execution part of it – something I dubbed in my head as “Party Syndrome”. Categorised by the extensive need to write a some sort of party in one too many chapters.

Jokes aside, the Social Events are VERY important for a murder case in every Danganronpa chapter. Basically Social Events is something that characters That Are NOT the Mastermind do that will affect the way the murder will play out. They are often made to be something to combat the Motive or other ways to cope with the reality of being in a killing game. Rarely they are set ups organised by a wannabe killer and when they are, the wannabe killer got beat to it by someone else. Except for all chapter 3 murders. Yeah, one of the absolutely weakest parts of every Dangnronpa games, what a surprise. Not! Absolutely no one is surprised that the most obvious murders have the easiest solution – a person who set the whole thing up. Which is an important lesson – sometimes the thing that makes the most sense is not a good answer for a good murder mystery.

There’s actually a lot of good examples of Social Events in the mainline DR games that aren’t some party. Like the switch of rooms between Sayaka and Makoto, the sauna challenge between Mondo and Kiyotaka, Kaede’s and Shuchi’s Mastermind investigation, Kaito’s and Shuichi’s training, Insect Meet and Greet (technically. Not a party. Kidnapping).

A lot of fangans faced this criticism about how weird it is to throw a party in the killing game, which is absolutely completely fair. Whatever your social event is, please remember that your characters in the story feel the weight of death on them. Even the most carefree and borderline delusional ones. Which unless it’s the point, not all and definitely not most of them. Keep it real, ask yourself would YOU approve of such an event in these circumstances? If not, why would it happen anyway? Or come up with other ways to introduce social activity. Remember the worst your characters can be is passive and reactive in lieu of being active and making decisions.

And that’s about covers Daily Life, in conclusion to the end of the segment I would like to say that Daily Life should highly set up the scene for Deadly Life, they should not exist as two separate entities. Of course when murder happens you are supposed to feel shocked, but to a reader of Danganronpa-like story it’s very obvious that the murders will happen. There’s no point of trying to surprise the audience, they highly expect it. So, set the viewer up properly instead of trying to use an element of shock. But don’t fall into the pit of predictability either. It’s a delicate balance.

DEADLY LIFE

Before we could go into details of Deadly Life part of Danganronpa Murder Mystery inner workings, I want to make a note of the methods they use to conceal the identity of the killer: time of death, murder scene and murder weapon. Or simplier put: “when?”,” where?” and “how?”.

On the most rare occasions it’s also “who?” as in “who’s the victim?”, such as in chapter 5 and 6 of THH and chapter 5 of V3, one of the most convoluted chapters of the entire game trilogy. The reason why it’s so rare is because, at its core, DR Killing Game is a closed murder mystery which means we have a set number of characters we know, so it becomes obvious who’s not with us anymore. It’s a really hard trick to pull off to completely disguise a victim to beyond recognition And not make it obvious who is missing from the cast. In THH it’s achieved by “extra body” of a secret sixteenth’s student who was murdered by a mastermind previously, the whole chapter relied on that lack of knowledge and was a set-up by a mastermind to get rid of one of the players. In the V3’s case however the idea was flipped – now it’s a plan of two students working together to confuse the game and break it, which was supposed to result in beating it entirely. The idea of both is pretty clever and it’s what sets these 5th cases apart so much.

But generally the culprit will try to conceal the true time of death, the true murder scene and the true murder weapon to hide their identity. Or for other reasons (ex. Mondo moved Chihiro’s body to Girl’s changing room in order to keep his secret rather than hide a true murder scene).

You should be aware that no matter how much effort you put into murder, there’s no such thing as a “perfect murder”, there never is. Especially in the DR killing game. The game is NOT fair for the killer, please, understand it. Your killer works alone against a group of innocent students AND against the Mastermind. Mastermind does want to test the participants’ abilities and for them to feel despair of possible looming death. HOWEVER, the mastermind won’t allow the unsolvable. The mastermind wants the game to continue, this is why they provide a case file about a murder. Of course they would leave out some information that would probably reveal the identity of the culprit immediately, but generally the mastermind's goal is to have the innocent party win and win until there’s 2 (or 3, depending on the rules) students remaining.

Also even if it wasn’t that way, it’s nearly impossible to set up a perfect murder, due to a killer and a victim being flawed. Everyone makes mistakes, especially in a high stress situation as murder.

Now we can move on to Deadly Life.

I would love to divide Deadly Life in three parts: a body discovery, investigation and a trial. Very obvious division, but an effective one at that.

When we talk about Body Discovery I of course mean these things:

When was the body discovered?

Who discovered the body?

What circumstances led to discovering the body?

These things are crucial to understand when you write a body discovery, because Discovering a body is one of the important things for the killer in the DR scenario. Until the body is discovered there will be no trial held, which means the killer has no chance of escape even if they kill somebody.

When was the body discovered? Time frame. In the killing game time measured a lot like this daytime/nighttime due to having morning and nighttime announcements and some areas being off-limits during night. Which actually doesn’t matter for Mastermind, I think. Like a lot of rules have literally no effect on the mastermind (like no sleeping outside dormitories). They are made exclusively for the murder mystery part, so guilty students could take advantage of it. When answering this question it’s also important to think “How much time has passed between actual death and the body discovery?” and “Why did it take this long to discover it?” and “Why discovering it at this time would benefit or hinder the killer?”.

Who discovered the body? According to canon DR rules across the trilogy, the body is officially discovered when three non-guilty participants see it. It’s a very special rule to the killing game and stayed a very important part of it across the mainline games. It’s often used to either deduce the killer or prove the innocence of one of the suspects. When you answer this question, think about “Why was it they who discovered the body?” if discovery wasn’t immediate after one person found it why didn’t they tell others?

What circumstances led to discovering the body? Did the group of participants just accidentally stumbled across the body? Did they come looking for this person, because they were missing? Were they doing something unrelated and the body just sort of dropped on them? Did they actively witness death live and where too late to save the person? And most importantly “why is this circumstance important/not important (in case they didn’t do any preparation) to the killer?”

Noticeably every part should include an answer to “Why?”. Killers in DR do not do anything for no reason. BECAUSE IT’S A WASTE OF TIME! If something doesn’t benefit them in some way, do not do it. Very simple.

The Investigation is a mandatory part of the game where you run around and note down all the clues you can find, as the name suggests. It’s always a convenient amount of time when at least one person finds everything there’s to find physically. The main mistake you can make during the investigation is to give out all the information about the circumstances of a murder. You give out hints, not the whole murder and it’s very important. If your audience solves the murder entirely from investigation alone – you’ve failed to write a mystery.

Class Trial – the main event of the Deadly Life, where innocent parties try to find the guilty and where the audience should try to puzzle together the whole mystery. During a class trial some new details about the murder should present themselves as we go along. Like for example in my absolute favourite case 4 for SDR2 where we deduce the layout of the funhouse. Something that we couldn’t understand from investigation alone. But it doesn’t have to be anything big like a whole layout of the building. It can be details of someone’s seeing the victim or the killer and realising it at the moment, the details of how some part of the mechanism works, etc. Also it’s the perfect time to catch slip-ups. The DR community do not usually like when something is solved on pure chance of slip-up, so if you plan on using them, make sure that instead of chance, your characters set up a trap for their suspect to fall in. That would look MUCH cooler than if your culprit just gave out too much info by accident.

A danganronpa case always gets solved because it was something specific to a character that only the culprit could have done, but it is not supposed to be obvious from the start.

Also I really want to bring attention to the victims of the case. Victim is an important part of the case WITH the killer. They should play an active part in the murder. This will further the context to the murder and give more mystery. Was the victim doing something to provoke the culprit? Why did the culprit choose this character as their victim? Did they even have a choice? If the victim was strong, how were they overpowered by the culprit? What if they wanted to be murdered? What if they tried to fight off the murderer and lost? Did the victim have habits a culprit took advantage of? All of that WILL directly affect the murder mystery. Make the victim an active character and make it so no one else but this character can be a victim in this case.

FROM START TO FINISH?

The truth is – murder mystery starts with a new chapter, we just do not know it yet. When you start writing a chapter you should already have an idea of who the culprit and victim are and how you want to carry out a murder in this chapter. Because you need to go through several steps and even the first one – level design with it in mind. It's kinda a question of “what came first, a chicken or an egg?”, but instead of “chicken” and “egg” it’s a “murder plan” and “level design”. Say, I can’t exactly tell if the idea of Kirumi using a ropeway that connects the gym window and a window of Ryoma’s lab through the pool came before or after they designed a level like that. And neither do I know how the hell they had an idea to use a confusing building structure of a funhouse from SDR2 as a “secret weapon” to kill a guy. But what I do know, it was set up from the very beginning of the chapters.

What I do know is, when you already have an idea who the culprit of the case is, try walking them through the chapter as if they were the protagonist. “What made them want to kill now?”, “how did they choose the victim, the timing?”. Construct a “perfect murder” from their POV, divide it into parts and think about what can go wrong? Because something always goes wrong. Maybe rules will affect their plan, or there will be some witnesses the culprit wasn’t expecting. If the whole thing was actually a freak accident – how would they react and improvise? How can you involve other characters into that murder otherwise?

Just start somewhere and answer your questions “what’s next?” on the way. When you write it it may seem genius and convoluted or maybe on the flip side, too simple and obvious. So my advice is to have a story “beta-testers”. When you finish the draft of a full chapter – send it for a reading to someone who could provide you with feedback on the quality of the mystery. They will tell you if you are being an idiot. If you work completely alone then it gets real hard to judge the story.

#> tired writes #I GUESS???#there's more than 3k words #but it's still kinda small because in theory there's a lot to expand on but I already put out thoughts I wanted so idc enough

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onomatopiya · 9 months

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writer tag game!

hiiii thank you @avi-why for tagging me this game seems so fun :D

1. is there a common piece of writing advice that you disagree with? alternatively, is there one you think (generally) most people should follow?

oooooh okay! generally i dislike any hard absolutes like "don't use adverbs ever" because i mean. no piece of advice like that will ever be universal and it's important to consider what Your Piece of writing needs rather than trying to fit a set of ~arbitrary guidelines~

as for advice i think works, i think consistency in writing will always be key to improvement. i like. very heavily stagnated in actual writing after covid (i was like. good lord i was 15 then. wild) because i got bogged down trying to make my book Perfect. and i think if i had actually written more during that time i would be a much better writer now! more writing = more improvement and practice makes pretty damn close to perfect etc etc

2. you can have dinner with any author, living or dead. but the catch is that after the dinner, you and that author will team up against a third writer in a no holds barred cage match throwdown. which 2 authors do you pick?

OOOOH ok. i'm currently very enamored with andrew joseph white and lee mandelo's writing because they both write GORGEOUS prose so maybe one of them? OOO or r.f. kuang . i think tolstoy should get got in the cage match. cry old man

3. have you ever experimented with poetry, plays, or screenwriting? what was the result?

YES i have and now i have a web series. help girl this was not supposed to be longer than a short fiction piece and yet. also shameless self plug you can read my web series about a dead girl haunting her own narrative HERE: https://gloryburning.substack.com/

i do want to experiment more with poetry though!!! that's one medium i haven't really dipped my toes into so to speak

4. what type of rancid twitter discourse would your current wip generate?

oh god what discourse WOULDN'T rr spark. i definitely think having an aroace mc weaponize someone else's attraction to him is probably um. discourse worthy. my top fear is that someone unironically ships lahar (romance and sex repulsed aroace) with anthony (horrible white savior who has no semblance of self) some other notable things that happen in the book:

diversity loss the capitalist kendall roy ass character (anthony) is gay

people of color get to KILL

ruh roh! tragedy :(

horrible horrible body augmentations with dangerous and ableist implications

so much murder. so much assassination. god bless

5. what author would you love to be compared to? what author would you hate to be compared to?

OOOOOOH . uhhhh i love so many authors oh god. i do love neil gaiman i would be so floored if someone compared me to that guy. OH and terry pratchett . probably would not want to be compared to like. jkr. booooo

6. design the ideal piece of merch/swag for your wip.

oh this one is so me bait. i have serious merch and then deeply unserious merch

7. free space: what's one thing you really want to talk about in your writing that no one ever asks about?

I LOVE soulmate horror and just. idk taking different concepts and hitting them with my aroace beam. i love aroace horror i love aroace people. and i think there should be more weird aspec fiction

and question time. putting them below the cut along with tags

what's the first story you can remember writing? how does it compare to the way your writing has evolved? where do you see your writing going in the future?

what parts of yourself (if any) have gone into your current wip? alternatively, how would you fare if you were suddenly dropped into your own wip?

what's one quality of your writing that feels completely unique? what's one thing you want to improve upon in the future?

make or share a meme that you feel captures the essence of your wip.

what are your goals as a writer? do you want to publish? is your writing for your eyes only?

which of your characters is your favorite to write and why?

free space: feel free to be self indulgent--do you have any aus or your wips? if so, what, and if not, what aus/fanfic would you write of your work?

tagging: @macywrites, @cream-and-tea, @saltwaterbells, @coffeeandcalligraphy, @wren-is-writing, @encrucijada, @snowinks, @chayscribbles, @cuntylittlesalmon, and anyone else who wants to do this

#writeblr #tag game #writblr

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glsneeg-enthusiast · 24 days

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???? Don't know much about the au but what's wrong with all that? Covid pllotlines are kind of normal in au's, separating one character into two characters is a tale as old as time in fandom- I'm just confused?

the hetch criken thing was personal preference honestly. however i think having the actual fucking pandemic that fucked people up in it and making a character die from it is maybe a little weird

#but i dont know maybe im biased for the covid thing because my family members died from it #and i dont think its fucking appropriate to put that shit in a fucking askblog

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ilovescaredysquirrel2 · 4 months

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Troom Troom: A cute DIY channel that turned EVIL

We need to talk about the DIY Channel called "Troom Troom". They're still around in 2024 and still making content that's... weird! Just plain weird!

What makes me mad is that they started out as a normal DIY channel (probably mostly for kids) and there very first video was a girl teaching you how to make a rustic pumpkin decoration, how o paint it and put lace on it. She had a soft spoken voice with a Ukrainian accent, and then they got different narrators over time. The first two American-sounding narrators were okay as well, but then they got an A.I generated voice. I'll admit, I used to love their old videos, up until around the time that covid hit and they started to get weirder and weirder. The thumbnails were often worse than the actual videos themselves but if you look on their channel right now, you'd see the most disgusting thumbnails to put on a "family friendly" channel. At least their stuff doesn't have an exact target audience, but it's pretty obvious that it's not adults (maybe the oldest target audience is college age?). They used to mostly do school supplies and room decor as their DIYs, but then slowly turned into an "Elsagate" type of channel. hey used to do sa few DIYs that had popular characters (like their Shaun the Sheep doorknob hanger that they made back in the 2010s) but that was completely innocent. Recently, they started dressing up as characters and making the elsagate-type of content. I saw one where they dressed up as characters from The Amazing Digital Circus, and do you know how many kids enjoy The Amazing Digital Circus? Like I said, the thumbnails are the biggest problem though. I used to see cute school supplies, to weird lip ones but the videos were still wholesome, but their newest videos just went insane and have the most disgusting, perverted thumbnails.

I heard that they're from Ukraine and I feel bad that their country was at war, but before the war they started making really horrible content. Like, I don't understand why they just turned from an innocent girly DIY channel, to disturbing content with thumbnails that minors should never see. What I think happened is that another company bought them, because they went from good to evil within the 7 years of them being on YouTube. I'm assuming it's the same company that owned "5 Minute Crafts", because they had that same kind of content but now their stuff is down right fetishy. I hope this kind of thing gets investigated soon! I miss Troom Troom's old videos, so I don't want the channel to end, but I'd like to know what's up with their new content and why it's so weird now.

Anyway, I put some pictures on screen to show you the difference between channel content and in their main channel, and you can tell me what you thoughts are!

#troom troom #what's wrong with the world #my thoughts #elsagate

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mollymagician · 11 months

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Dreamling Week Day 6: Sick

A companion to this and also this.

It was day two of watching Dream’s fledgling immune system engaging in gritty trench warfare with what he hoped was the flu, and Hob was maybe…losing it a little. Just a bit.

Though it was obvious which one of them was more miserable, startling awake every few minutes for hours to the sound of Morpheus’ wracking coughs left Hob strung-out and woozy. But that wasn’t anything he hadn’t dealt with before.

It was just that, for all he’d known that this was inevitable, it was still a shock to his system to watch. Every time. With anyone he loved. Fresh blood from the 600 year old scab that had formed over the memory of his family dying of the plague. And the knowledge that Dream couldn’t die didn’t help nearly as much as he’d hoped it would.

Now he lay awake, too keyed up to doze back off. Dream was a long burning line beside him in the dark. Quiet and finally able to rest for nearly a blessed hour, thank God.

Quiet for a certain value of the word, anyway.

He twitched in his sleep, shivering, hands grasping fitfully at the blankets. Murmured incoherently on and off. But the coughing was settled for now and that was half the battle. Hob laid a hand against his sternum as his raspy breathing quickened, pressing gently. “Shhh, dove.” The bare skin was hot under his hand. Hot, hot, hot. After watching him sweat through his second shirt in as many hours, Hob had given up on hassling him to change into fresh ones and let it go.

It was probably the flu, Hob told himself. Again. The COVID test he’d pulled from his stash in the bathroom had come back negative, but what did that even mean anymore? He’d put in calls and informed all pertinent parties that he’d be isolating, anyway, with a sick partner who had all the symptoms. (Who still seemed so NEW, whose body still sometimes seemed to forget the rules it was playing under.)

They’d started him on an immunization schedule as soon as he was able. “Look. Even if it can’t kill us, whatever it is we get,” Hob had told him, “we still might pass it on, yeah? Better for everyone if we make sure that we can’t. And…there are things…” He felt his face twisting into some wry, sad thing. “Even if they can’t kill you, there are some experiences I’d spare you, if I can.”

Hob expected an argument, but Dream just regarded him for a long moment, nodded solemnly, and that was that. Hob found him a physician who was well known for his experience with neurodivergent patients, assuming that would be their best bet, and they cooked up a story about Dream finally removing himself from a “complicated family situation” that had resulted in an adult who had never once been to a doctor and needed to begin a vaccine regimen ASAP.

Apparently as soon as possible hadn’t been quite soon enough.

Beside them on the nightstand, an alarm began to chime softly from his phone and Hob reached over to silence it. He scrubbed a hand over his face

“After everything you’ve been through,” Hob whispered, “what does that brain of yours see when it goes haywire like this, eh?” He pressed a hand to Dream’s burning forehead. “Or is weirdness so normal that your sick dreams are all about toasters and shopping for socks?”

“My sister,” Dream rasped, “can make even socks as weird as anything you can imagine.”

Hob leaned over to peer down at him and caught the glint of pale blue eyes just barely cracked open in the dimness.

“When you’re right, you’re right,” Hob said softly. He brushed lank hair from Dreams face carefully. “I am so sorry to wake you, love, but it’s time for more meds.”

Dream stared at him for a few moments before his eyes drifted closed. “Yes,” he murmured.

Hob had begun to shuffle himself out of bed when a hot, clammy hand suddenly wrapped itself around his wrist. He glanced down to find Dream looking back at him, glassy and intense. “You were gone,” he said, his normally velvet-dark voice sounding as though he’d gone a few rounds with a cheese grater and lost.

Hob lifted the hand that gripped him and kissed the backs of Dreams fingers. “I’ve been here all night, I promise.”

“No. You asked what I saw…I…” Dream swallowed. “I kept seeing that day. The White Horse ruined, and I walk but there’s nothing to find, because you’re gone. And always I end up…back where I started…”

“Fuck, Dream.” Hob climbed back across the bed and gathered Dream against him. “But you see now that didn’t happen, right? Look.” He lifted Dreams hand, held cupped in his own like nesting bowls, and kissed his fingers. “I’m here, and that didn’t happen. I just need to go for a moment. To the kitchen. I’ll be right back, you just…stay right where you are.”

Ridiculous, considering Dream would probably be out again in seconds but Dream nodded, and let Hob go.

——————————

By the dim glow of the oven range light, Hob found the bottle of paracetamol he’d left on the counter and set about filling a mug with water and wetting a tea towel.

From the open window behind him he heard a familiar flutter, and Matthew landed on the back of one of the kitchen chairs. “Hey,” he said, “so how’s our guy?”

Hob ran a hand through his already disastrous hair. “Could be worse?”

“Yeah that’s about what I figured.”

Hob obligingly let him hitch a ride on his shoulder down the hallway, and he disembarked onto the top of the dresser, uncharacteristically quiet.

“Dream, love, wake up.” Hob laid a hand against Dreams cheek, jostling him gently. “I’m sorry, duck, I need you to drink for me. Come on.” Dream woke with a sharp breath, eyes tracking quickly around the room before meeting Hob’s. The tension drained visibly from him.

“Hob…” he said. When nothing else seemed to be forthcoming, Hob leaned in and helped him shuffle up against the pillows. He took two pills and drank half a mug of water before turning away with a scrunched, pained expression. “No more.”

“Okay.” Hob set the mug aside, knowing if he pushed his luck then everything that just went down would come back up. He gently went about wiping away a nights worth of clammy sweat from Dream’s face and neck with the towel.

“Thank you,” Dream murmured, followed by a tumble of words in a language Hob didn’t recognize (and he thought he’d heard them all.) Then, “I’m sorry…I…”

There was a soft thump as Matthew landed on the bed beside them. “Dude, what the hell was that?”

Hob sighed. “That was probably the hundred and three degree fever talking.” He pressed the towel to the pulse beating in the hinge of Dream’s jaw. “Though it happens sometimes on a good day. Think his brain’s still working out the kinks.”

Matthew sat silently for a long minute, watching Dream shifting restlessly beneath the blankets. Then he said, in a voice more subdued than Hob thought him capable of, “I feel kinda shitty, you know? I thought him being human, it was gonna be a big larf. Haha, right? I forgot for a sec how much it sucks balls, sometimes.”

Hob chuckled. “That’s certainly one way to put it.”

Matthew hopped over to Dream, close enough to preen gently at a lock of tangled hair. “You’re gonna feel better in no time, Boss 1.0”

He looked up at Hob. “There, uh, anything I can do for you guys? I mean, I was a lousy cook even when I was human so I wouldn’t trust my chicken soup if I was you but, you know, anything else I can do. Just ask.”

Hob opened his mouth to reply, and suddenly felt hot fingers, curling around his wrist again. Gripping tight. He dropped the towel and covered Dream’s hand with his own, then shifted to lace their fingers together.

“Actually, Matthew, can you ask Daniel to do me a favor?” The enormity of the fact that he could say this, so casually, as though he was asking someone to pick up milk at the shops, wasn’t lost on him. “Could you ask him to get a message to Del for me?” He rubbed Dreams fingers where they were locked with his own and felt the grip relax. “Tell him to ask her…to send us some goldfish instead. She’ll know what you mean.”

“Right,” Matthew said. “As Boss 2.0 to ask Del for goldfish. You got it.”

“Thanks Matthew.”

“Hey, anything for you guys.” He took off through the door and vanished in that uncanny way he had. Hob reached for his phone, carefully set the next alarm, and slid back under the blankets, tugging Dream against him in the gray pre-dawn light. “Not going anywhere,” he whispered, and lay his head down to sleep.

#dreamling #DreamlingWeek2023 #Sick #hob gadling #dream of the endless #retired!Dream au #matthew the raven #dream x hob #maybe kinda rushed because I maybe accidentally erased half of it #and had to rewrite it all #arrgh

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sweetdreamspootypie · 4 days

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🙃

I'm flying out tomorrow

Had a good night tonight

But

Vent / processing / just capturing some of the stuff I've been thinking about

It's so strange how different my worldview is because I'm a Covid nurse

Or maybe everyone else is insane

Who is to say

TW car accident, child injury

Managed to go see the last set of cousins tonight

My aunt was like

" oh yeah last few days I've been really sick

Had a really bad flu

Still coughing actually

But we don't believe in taking to our beds for just a flu lol"

And my cousin mentioned she doesn't know when the last time she took a RAT test was. Didn't even recognize the name. Said "oh yeah that's kind of outdated"

And NOBODY I've talked to has even been aware that there are still Covid booster vaccines happening and relevant?

They only ever had the initial course of 3 or 4 and then stopped? Didn't even know that further boosters are a thing at all?

and cousin told me that you don't take time off work for Covid here because it's not considered life threatening anymore

What the fuck is wrong with england

Why would you invite guests over if you actively have the flu?

Fuck man

Like it was actually a pretty good evening and it will probably be fine

But it's just so weird seeing the increasing divide in basic values

Like yeah I value hard work and discipline and etc etc and I want to get better at it

But how do these people value self care so little?

Idk I'm just hyper aware of it as well bc of my family's thing with chronic fatigue syndrome and how precarious wellbeing is

But also stuff like

Hard work is "being responsible" because idk doing your part at work on the project or whatever

But in my line of work

If I don't rest

If I don't eat or take my breaks or I haven't been sleeping well or burn out

Then I cannot provide the healthcare to others that is needed

I've got such vivid visceral memories of standing there as I'm realizing I need to hit the medical emergency big red button, at times when I'm over tired and not feeling my best self

Feeling my words and thoughts running like treacle and just being so aware of oh shit I'm not actually up for being responsible for this right now actually

And when I'm in that state and the adrenaline hits, it just makes it worse

I can feel my heart pounding in my ears and my dehydration headache and having to muster ok I have to be reassuring and communicative and make sure I'm dexterous enough to manage a complex situation

And if I can't manage it, people get hurt

And there's a very real risk that someone gets closer to death than they needed to, or would have if I had been on the ball and my best self

The other day, on Monday

I had a coffee at 12 noon

It was a really nice rich mocha from a chocolate specialist

I'm not accustomed to caffeine any more these days, so I was awake until 4am Monday night

On Tuesday night, despite being tired, I was also awake til 3am because of the disturbance to my sleep schedule it caused

On Wednesday, I was feeling gross from the sleep disturbance. I went to my room and tried to take an afternoon nap

At 4pm on Wednesday, there was a car accident outside of our house. A car hit a 3 year old child crossing the road with his mother.

My dad came to get me because I'm a nurse and that's my job.

When he came in I was in a groggy half asleep haze

I had my shoes on and was out the door but was still carrying a head of groggy haze

The kid was fine

Someone else was checking him out, asking all the right questions

And within a couple of minutes an ambulance arrived, and got to do a further assessment

It looked like the child had a bit of a bumped knee, probably from where he fell, but was otherwise just fine

Mum with him was being a champion at visibly keeping it together until tonight after the kids are put to bed, when she'll fall apart

I was able to be there to see that it was under control and looked on until the ambulance arrived

But I was so aware that I wouldn't able to clearly speak. Wouldn't be able to project calming competence with even just the simple fact of introducing myself as a health worker available if needed

Everything was fine

But if it hadn't been

I would not have been able to fulfil my role

Because I hadn't taken proper care of myself

I'm going to remember my guilt over one badly planned coffee I had on Monday, for years

Because my job is to be the one who knows how to make it alright when everything is wrong

Why the fuck can't other people do the simple things like isolate if sick

And not expose illness to people going back to the home of their 89 year old grandmother

I don't want to live to work

I want to live well

And wellness and happiness are important values and resources

And not contradictory with working hard to make progress on goals

People need to learn to rest

I didn't realize how bad it was

#My posts #My life #Vent #Plagueblogging #Processing #Using Tumblr as a diary #It would be fine but bc I'm already feeling ick from the sleep loss #I don't know #I have been helpful with Dadi's foot wound though #Which feels good #Just being able to be an educated opinion #Tw car accident #Cw child injury #Kid is fine

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quotesfrommyreading · 11 months

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The COVID was the easiest part. I was practically asymptomatic. I walked the dog, drove four hours in the car, hiked the beach, canoed. This was in late June. The doctors in my life should have understood that this spooky absence of symptoms was an ominous sign—my immune-compromised self wasn’t putting up a fight when it should have. Instead, they all brushed off my concerns when I rang. To a person, they steered me away from Paxlovid.

Remember that crazy national moment when doctors were being weird about Paxlovid? And were really down on it? I got COVID in that brief window.

I cannot tell you how often I go back to that moment and take Paxlovid. It’s the world’s most unproductive form of magical thinking, trying to undetonate this bomb. And yet I do.

Anyway, around day 10, things went south. I was suddenly dizzy every moment of the day. The world looked like The Blair Witch Project, always bouncing. It bounced when I chewed. Then came the tinnitus, the ear fullness. Ménière’s disease seemed likely.

Google Ménière’s disease. It’s very challenging. I have nothing but compassion for those who have it.

Many elaborate tests later, I turned out not to have it.

The nature of my dizziness changed, feeling more like a gyroscope was spinning in my head, or like I was being pulled slantwise by magnetic raindrops, every damn second. Then came the whale of all symptoms: My head started to vibrate, painfully, every time I walked or talked.

People have asked me a lot about this. I really don’t know how else to explain it. I mean, imagine a tuning fork inside your brain. Every time I take a step, I feel it in my skull. Ditto when I speak. My latest combo of meds blunts most of the pain that comes with it. But the vibrating remains, and it’s driving me mad. I’m waiting on my insurance company to approve Botox injections to my skull. (Oh, the irony of being a 53-year-old woman praying for Botox in a place where it will have no visible aesthetic benefit.)

Then my standing heart rate got too fast. (Now it’s fine.) Then my blood pressure spiked when I stood, plus other forms of autonomic dysregulation. My eyeballs spin freely in their sockets for the first 20 minutes of each morning, for instance. Then my chest started to ache. Maybe from the blood-pressure spikes, maybe something else. And I’m short of breath now when I walk, as I said.

You see the problem, right? My aching chest, my breathlessness—it all means more doctors. And I am really, really sick of doctors. Most of them know nothing, and if they can’t help you, they have little time for you. Many of them dramatically underestimate quality of life as an issue.

The shape-shifting nature of long-COVID symptoms also makes our medical system ill-suited to deal with long COVID. (Actually, it’s ill-suited for a thousand reasons. But this is one.) Telling your long-COVID story in 15 minutes, which is what most doctors have for you, is not possible. You develop shorthand. You resort to metaphors. Both are problems. One doctor asked if I thought there was an actual gyroscope in my head, for instance. “Uh, this is a vestibular problem I’m describing,” I said, “not a psychiatric one.” Asshole.

The worst part? Because no one understands what causes long COVID, even the best doctors can only treat your symptoms separately. My blood pressure gets two medications. My vibrating head gets a third. My vestibular symptoms get a fourth. My pain gets a fifth. Inflammation gets a sixth. The microclots I may or may not have, which may or may not cause long COVID, require three different supplements, which may or may not work.

This said, the long-COVID team at New York’s Mount Sinai Hospital at least thinks holistically, even if they don’t know what lurks at the heart of my problems. I feel lucky to be under their care (plus two dogged and creative immunologists at Columbia Presbyterian). I cannot imagine what it’s like for the millions of Americans who don’t have access to the minds and resources I do.

— What Not to Ask Me About My Long COVID

#jennifer senior #what not to ask me about my long covid #current events #medicine #science #biology #human biology #illness #disability #chronic illness #covid 19 #long covid #paxlovid

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arecomicsevengood · 8 months

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TRIP REPORT: SPX 2023

I went down to the Small Press Expo in Bethesda, Maryland this past Sunday. While I lived in Baltimore for a number of years, and it was essentially a local show, this is the first time I've been since moving to Philly in 2019. It took a year (or two?) off on account of COVID. I don't have much to say about the show itself, I enjoyed walking around talking to people, I probably didn't see all the stuff I would've liked, I'm not really in a good place to judge trends. I missed some people I would've liked to have met, like Drew Lerman, who left before I got there. He won an Ignatz though, and good for him. I do believe that the thing about SPX and the Ignatzes is that everyone essentially occupies very different spheres of interest and sets of influences. As I walked around, seeing little cards on people's comics saying they were nominated for an Ignatz, I would ask them if they had heard of or were familiar with the thing that won, they almost never were.

At the one panel discussion I attended, about drawing detailed backgrounds as a way of of establishing worldbuilding, Rosemary Valero-O'Connell cited Taiyo Matsumoto's approach as an influence, and as I sat in the audience thinking "Yes! Let's talk more about that!" everyone else on stage, quite reasonably, talked about their own influences instead - which for Daria Tessler, who I came to see, included Mark Beyer and Jim Woodring. The panel was generally good and interesting, and it's not meant as a slight to the moderator Rob Clough to point out that the best questions came during the Q+A from the audience. One member asked the question, how do you handle tonal shifts when you are using detailed visuals for plot purposes, and everyone agreed that that at emotional climaxes or at moments of more interiority they reduce the level of background detail.

Daria Tessler was the artist I was most excited to meet of anyone at the fest. Since my local shop, Partners And Son, is on top of it, I had already read her newest comic, volume 2 of Cagelessness, which absolutely rules, and so I had to shell out the big bucks for a copy of her fully-silkscreened book Dust, that uses multi-color collages as a backdrop for the cowboy characters who, in Cagelessness, move through ornately designed drawn worlds. Her work is beautiful, another high point of the panel discussion was her talking about how Marc Bell calls the tiny details cluttering up the backgrounds of his comics "chicken fat," and while Clough cited the term as originating from Will Elder, Tessler described chicken fat as "what you put in the soup to make it taste better, if you're not vegan," perfectly capturing what makes these artists work such a delicious meal for the eyes.

A similar "I already have all of these" experience was behind my purchase of Tales Of Old Snake Creek, by Drew Lerman, which collects his anthology contributions from recent years and adds watercolor to them. I love these comics in their original formats but I'm not going to say no to the convenience of this, which is also printed at a size larger than the digests in which some things ran.

Shout-out to Bread Tarleton, who pointed out to me the Paradise Systems table, where everything looked good and lavish, but what I picked up was Cry by Yan Cong. I believe Paradise Systems to be a reprinter of self-published comics from China. Cry features cartoony figures in a charcoal textured world, and follows a man having a sexual experience with a prostitute with a weird visual punchline.

Adam Szym directed me to the Strangers Fanzine table, where I picked up Shony Glassware 2 by Manning Coe, which is in some ways probably the sort of zine a lot of people go to SPX to get. Pretty funny stuff, maybe Ben Jones influenced, by a 26-year-old who lives in Osaka. Drawing himself in a Beat Happening shirt but with a bio where he talks about listening to 100 Gecs, there is a definite vibe at work here and while I don't remember the price point of this one I feel like it had to be cheap because it's that kind of comic. If you're ordering the new printing of Bhanu Pratap's Dear Mother from Strangers and want something else that's not too genre-y make sure you throw this in there.

Adam Szym's Their Use Continues is a horror short about the current trend towards reviving dead actors as CGI phantoms in movies currently in the news. Feels nice and relevant, I think I would've liked this to be a little bit bigger (it's printed digest size) and hi-res. Adam uses some digital collage elements for backgrounds and borders that I mostly felt was making the book smaller and fuzzier still.

I nonetheless liked it better than another horror comic I picked up, issue 1 ofJenna Cha and Lonnie Nadler's The Sickness, published by Uncivilized. Both people are more mainstream-comics, which I think is fine, but this does something I really associate with the dumbest kind of attitude that can be present in horror stuff, the kind of tonal miscalculation the comics I like avoid: Presenting a mid-century American setting where characters nonetheless are using a high degree of vulgar language, of a sort that would be stylized and off-putting if it were depicting the modern era but really just completely pulls me out of something set in the past. The second printing changes the color palette on the cover in a way that makes the drawing better, but this is not the sort of thing I would recommend anyone track down, which is sad, because it's likely far more readily available than anything I liked.

Tim Lane's Happy Hour In America 1, from a few years ago, was available at the Fantagraphics table. Presumably because Tim was signing, but I never saw him. I haven't read the big books collecting his short stories, but I like his contributions to anthologies. He's a guy who can really draw, in a way that you don't often see at small press shows, or that feels more appreciated by a mainstream-comics crowd. If his stories aren't as psychotically involved on a plot level as Mack White, he's nonetheless interesting as like a Gen X'er talking about American masculinity and what animates it. I would gladly read it in single issue comics format, though I missed these the first time because it wasn't what I felt I was in the mood for.

Another thing I picked up as a half-off copy of David B's Incidents In The Night, volume 2, from Uncivilized. I think volume 1 did pretty well, and is now sold out, but now that that's unavailable, volume 2 is a harder sell. David B is one of those dudes, like Joann Sfar or Christophe Blain, that got the big bookstore push like fifteen years ago but now no one wants to put out their books in the U.S. David B is also a guy, like GIpi, who had a comic put out by the Ignatz line Fantagraphics had. I bought issue 1 of Babel at the time and didn't care for it, and would've told you I didn't iike David B's work. But lately I've been tracking down books in the Ignatz line I skipped the first time (along with the First Second books of Gipi and Sfar from roughly the same time) and enjoying them, and this fits into that trend as well. A pretty involving plot, involving booksellers, the occult, criminal organizations. I both want to track down a copy of volume 1 and am frustrated that the volume 3 advertised at the end of this book was never translated into English.

Yasmeen Abediford's Death Bloom won an Ignatz, for best minicomic. All of the Ignatz awards are really ill-defined categories, and this is one is a $25 risograph thing, which to me seems like it should exist in a different category than cheapo xerox stuff, but whatever. Anyway, I believe Abediford will also be in the new issue of Freak, which I have seen Instagram posts indicating contributors got an advance copy of but have yet to be for sale online. Abediford is from the Bay Area, but this book was printed by Lucky Pocket Press, based in Baltimore, but from people who either moved there or didn't have the press going until after I left there. They sold me the comic in a little printed bag, which included a family tree for their little mascot guy, citing the "onion peow guy" as "(father, deceased)" and "(comics legend)," which is interesting to me insofar as I don't think of any of the Peow stuff as being interesting to me, though I'm happy it found its audience and made a mark. I don't really get this one either but whatever, I'll reread it tos ee if my opinion changes.

I would also put the output of publisher Silver Sprocket in a similar category to Peow - Not for me, seems like it's for younger people, in a way that dominates SPX as it's currently constituted. I have the deepest sympathies for them not being able to dominate SPX this year though, due to a misplaced/inaccessible pallet of books that they didn't get until halfway through Sunday. They had flown out Leo Fox from England, to debut his new book Prokaryote Season. I had seen Fox's stuff on Twitter last year and thought it looked good/interesting, but was also frustrated by the fact that he had apparently released a comic that was only for sale for 24 hours - maybe a way to create demand so that people actually order a thing, but in an artificial scarcity kind of way I resent. Anyway, I bought one of his self-published things, My Body Unspooling, and yeah I think it looks really cool and interesting, though the approach taken, a sort of simple narrative about the notion of the self rather than something that seems interested in having characters interact is again the kind of trend I blanch at in work made by people younger than me. I nonetheless liked the comic, and thought it was cool, and am going to read his book soon.

I bought issue 9 of Mike Centeno's Futile from the Radiator Comics distro booth. It is explicitly labeled as No Previous Readin' Necessary, so while there were two older issues of Futile at the table, printed at smaller dimensions, I didn't pick them up. This was cool, a mostly black and white (but with pages in the middle in color) comic about a musician taking mushrooms . It looks great on a flipthrough, though Audra Stang, working the table, tried to close the center-spread of my flipthrough so that the burst into full-color I was admiring didn't spoil the story's progression and surprises. Format and cartooning kinda reminded me of Nate Doyle's series Crooked Teeth. (Nate had a larger-formatted barbarian fantasy comic available from Strangers Fanzine, which I passed on.)

I also bought Beth Heinly's Girls Named Meghan from her, though Heinly is Philly-based and I've had plenty of chances to pick it up before. It's a memoir of her teenage years, growing up in Delaware County, which is where I went to high school, and the friendships she had that veered into rebellion and her apprehensions about being around people more "troubled" than she was. It is basically black and white but there's little red-pencil edits throughout, like maybe the wrong PDF was sent to the printer or something, sourced from a file where she was noting what she wanted to fix. I don't think of the other copies I have seen were like this though. Again, I think this is the sort of self-published autobio thing that many people go to SPX to find. I can see the places there this could be stronger or more impactful but there is still a fine sense for who all the characters were, and what the era was like.

I got a few other things but this is all I have read so far, at this moment when I felt like writing. Andrew White gave me a copy of the new Yearly, and a name I recognized from his writing for The Comics Journal, Henry Chamberlain, gave me a copy of his book George's Run, a biography of a Twilight Zone writer published by Rutgers University Press. I also got issue 3 of a comic called Cat Scratch Fever by a woman named Emily Zullo, and Soumya Dhulekar's Flash Valley. Both of these are in the classic digest sized minicomic format with black and white throughout, though Dhulekar opted for a a cardstock cover. This is the sort of thing I am most happy to buy from a stranger at a show and basically not even care about the quality as long as the price is right, though of course the price for both of these is higher than it used to be. I also bought and haven't yet read Leo Fox's Prokaryote Season, the theoretical "book of the show," although another contender for that title, the collection of Liam Cobb comics, What Awaits Them, looked great but I will pick it up when it comes into my local shop.

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sofarsofastmp3 · 4 months

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15 people, 15 questions!

thanks for the tag @couthbbg i can’t think of the last time i did one of these it was super fun :)

1. are you named after anyone?

no! i’m actually the only one of my siblings who doesn’t have a family connected first/middle name. and i do NOT have a complex about that

2. when was the last time you cried?

i get misty eyed once every 5-7 business hours as is my nature as a pisces, but i last properly cried on new year’s eve. it’s tradition!

3. do you have kids?

nope!

4. what sports do you play/have you played?

i played soccer for like three years as a kid and hated! it! like “cried putting my cleats on” hated soccer. but i played softball up until my freshman year of high school. i’ve been wanting to get back into hitting recently? i found a batting cage near me i just gotta go. i dabble in tennis casually but i’m not good at ALL i have a fifteen dollar racket and a dream

5. do you use sarcasm?

more than i’d like to. had a very sarcastic upbringing but it doesn’t sound good on me (inherently earnest and lame)

6. what’s the first thing you notice about people?

hair i think? especially “post” covid, it’s got to either be hair or eyes. even when someone isn’t wearing a mask it’s what i see first

7. what’s your eye color

brown, babeyy

8. scary movies or happy endings?

i like both! across all art, the two genres i consume most are weird/gory and Romantic Comedy. to have a real answer, i’ll say happy endings only because scary movies are my least favorite type of scary media. i am VERY easily startled so i’ve always hated jump scares and was actually really horror averse until college because of it

9. any talents?

i think i USED to be a solid writer, but in the last three years i’ve gotten really out of practice. i miss it. i’m really good and fast at shuffling cards! which is a fun random one. i’m also really good at guess that song? if you’re in a do or die “guess this song in ten seconds” situation i am your girl

10. where were you born?

south florida!

11. what are your hobbies?

i read a lot. i go through phases where i play a lot of solitaire. like with a physical deck of cards. lovee a puzzle! i want to try needlepoint!

12. do you have any pets?

“my dog” is technically my sisters dog but we’ve lived together for like 6 of his 9 years on this earth and i’ve cleaned poop crusties off him when he was sick. so i feel like he’s mine too. his name is kona, which people always mishear as coda (of brother bear fame) which i actually think is a better name

13. how tall are you?

much like your average nhler, i claim to be slightly taller than i am. i’m 5’6 but usually try to say i’m close to 5’7 because i’m one of the shortest people in my family. my twelve year old cousin just passed me. it’s so rough out here.

14. favorite subject in school?

english and latin! i’ve actually been wanting to get back into latin as a hobby which is maybe the most insufferable thing i could add to my list of already insufferable traits. but i miss it

15. dream job?

i want my own bookstore so bad it makes me look stupid. a store opened up like a half hour from me that’s kind of my ideal. new/used books/music AND they’ve got a cafe! i haven’t been yet but really want to go. i’m on a hard book buying ban until june with 3 pre-determined exceptions, one of those being my birthday in march (the other two being the pub dates for my most anticipated releases), so i think i may check it out as a treat to myself then!!

i think the bulk of people have done this, but if you haven’t i would love to hear what you have to say!!! :)

#love a venue to ramble!#about me

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