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#may I ask for reblogs?

eralacrimae · 5 months

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It was my birthday yesterday! May I kindly ask for reblogs on my art as a present? 🎉

#artists on tumblr #art #illustration #birthday #warhammer 40k #john wick chapter 4 #saint francis of assisi #original character #oc #digital art #digital artist #may I ask for reblogs?

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inkskinned · 10 months

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so while i was writing the book, i became violently suicidal.

this was mostly due to the fact that i had a very bad reaction to some meds and my brain stopped producing any serotonin. also i was in the last semester of grad school where it's actually illegal to feel anything but dread. so it wasn't going well.

somewhere in the fog of it i became aware i needed help. nobody was taking clients or my insurance. i didn't want to do inpatient care - it wasn't right for my needs. there's not really an "in between" stage between "inpatient" and "no care," but i was trying to do the right thing. i was trying to activate the chain of command that was my emergency plan. i knew i needed help now.

i used betterhelp.

i know, i know. i'm a straight-A student and so smart and so clever, how could i ever use something so blatantly bad. to be honest with you, i didn't feel particularly keen on it from the getgo - things that seem too good to be true usually are. also, if something online is free, the price is usually your privacy.

the thing is that there was kind of a global pandemic happening at the time and i worked 5 jobs alongside of being a fulltime student and also like writing a book on the side. it is a miracle that i even thought about getting help. i would love to tell you i had the mental wherewithal to like, process whether this was the right choice for me. mostly i was desperate. i was so suicidal that i was trying to find a reason to stay inside of fortune cookies. i was the kind of suicidal that looks like splatterpaint. i hadn't been that bad in an entire decade.

they took my data. i gave them it freely. somewhere out there, they have a dossier on me. on everything i survived. my story in little datapoints, scattergraphed beautifully.

the first woman told me that really i should be grateful, because (and this is a direct quote): "at least you're not anne frank." i said that i felt that statement was antisemitic, as anne frank's life and experience shouldn't be compared to like, a nonbinary lesbian in western massachusetts. the therapist said that i should try to use lucid dreaming to try to picture myself in an actually scary situation, like running from nazis.

i applied for another therapist. i was willing to accept the possibility that there was a bad apple in the bunch. the next therapist and i even laughed about how inappropriate that statement was. and then, in our next session: the new therapist said if i was struggling with body image issues, i should just work harder on my appearance. she spent 3 sessions in a row talking about how she was grieving, and made me memorize facts about her grandmother so "she can live on through my clients."

i am a three's-a-charm kind of person. okay, so what if the last person made me uncomfortable. i figured it was just a misunderstanding of priorities - she had felt she was sharing with me, i had felt like i had to take care of her. i applied for another therapist.

the last woman asked me to help her pray. she bowed her head. i stared at her, frozen, while she said: lord, i beg you: cure her. take the pain of being gay away from her.

i spent somewhere between 2.5 and 3 months on betterhelp. in that whole time, i was not getting the professional help i so desperately needed, even though i was fucking trying.

in the end, i survived this because i finally could get off the meds that were literally killing me. a request for a real therapist finally went through. i survived because my friends saved my life. because nick let me sob myself dry in his arms. because maddie took the razors out of my room when i asked them to. because grace slept over in my bed for like 3 weeks in a row since nobody trusted me not to hurt myself when i was alone. i survived because i got fucking lucky. because even when i was desperately suicidal, i was too old and too self-aware to take "you need to be prettier" as good advice.

the thing is that there's a 19 year old me who isn't like that. who would have heard "just think about how grateful you should be" and said - oh, i see. i would have assumed that is what it means to be in therapy: the same thing my abusers used to tell me. that i am just pretending and lazy. that i am ugly and unworthy.

betterhelp positioned itself to take advantage of an incredibly vulnerable community. it preys on desperation. it knows it is serving people who are not doing well mentally. it saw that there is a huge need for real, immediate, compassionate mental health care: and then it fucking takes your money and privacy.

i still get their ads on instagram. last night i watched as a woman in a pool pretends to talk to a different woman. they discuss her anxiety.

there's a 19 year old version of me, and she didn't survive this. she was too tired, and drowning. i almost fucking died. this thing almost fucking killed me.

in the ad, the woman playing the therapist takes a note on a clipboard and then nods once, sagely.

i have to admit it's a pretty scene. the steam and light coming off the pool water lands on the actresses. like this, it almost looks baptismal, holy.

#writeblr #the book....#coming soon #hey so if ur someone who has ever said “you need to write a book”#i wrote the book #it's ... probably the best thing ive ever written #this is maybe too honest lol #okay to reblog thank you for asking i love u i am in love with u our wedding will be in may

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lusilly · 2 years

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if u are in the state of california, or can get to the state of california, you can get abortion on demand for absolutely free by doing this

go to a hospital listed under the "qualified provider" list here: https://www.dhcs.ca.gov/services/medi-cal/eligibility/Pages/HospitalPE.aspx

ask for HPE

no information needs to be verified. you can lie and you will not get in any trouble, EVER. say your income is less than $1k a month. you do not need to give a SSN but do not comment on your immigration status. i recommend you don't mention you're pregnant even if you are, but if you do tell them you're pregnant, you'll still be able to access abortion care (it's just that it limits other non-abortion services available to you - it's complicated). if you're just visiting california, say that you're a resident (NOT visiting). give an in-state home address. (this will not be verified. give any address as long as it's in-state. could be a hotel or a liquor store or anything)

you will get immediate medi-cal coverage for the rest of the month you're in and the month following. (for example, if you applied today, june 24, you would get coverage from today to july 31).

note that this is fee for service medi-cal. this means you are not enrolled in a managed care plan

find a fee for service provider who provides abortions (check your county website, but you can also refer here: https://data.ca.gov/dataset/enrolled-medi-cal-fee-for-service-provider). most planned parenthood locations accept fee for service medi-cal, but check before you go

if you run out of time (i highly recommend you know EXACTLY where you're going to go and verify that you can get an appointment within 60 days before you get coverage at a hospital), it is possible to get coverage again through this process by using a DIFFERENT NAME AND DOB. that is crucial. you will be denied if you don't. **note: if the hospital, or the provider afterwards, asks for your ID to verify name and dob, tell them you don't have one. they are required to go to "reasonable efforts" to verify that you're the person you say you are, but they cannot deny you service for not having an ID.**

just be sure that whatever name and DOB is on your eligibility document (the hospital will give this to you when you apply), that is the name and DOB you give the provider

i know this isn't super helpful as californians are not the ones at risk here; but if someone from out of state can get to california, then you can get an abortion without having to pay for it

#abortion #this is literally instructions on how to get a medical abortion in the state of california for 100% free with no copay no matter what #i know that we've been talking about programs to help people get to CA for abortion access too #i literally manage pregnancy medicaid programs in CA so if u have questions ask me #ok to reblog and ENCOURAGED to steal this information and repost cuz i may one day delete this (like for instnace if my job finds out lmao)

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luthqrs · 3 months

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doctor who big finish audio stories!

you may have seen my nuwho books post and thought “well that’s all good and proper but i wanted the big finish audio dramas >:(“ fear not, because i have a collection of those too and i am still not allergic to sharing :)

also up for grabs: doctor who novelisations (x) and torchwood big finish audios (x)

a list of what’s there + how to play below the cut x

things you’ll find here:

new who + misc

the diary of river song (series 1-12)

the tenth doctor and river song (series 1)

the tenth doctor adventures (series 1-3)

the ninth doctor adventures (series 1-3)

unit incursions (episodes 8.04 + 8.05)

unit nemesis (series 4)

missy (series 1-3)

the eighth of march (3.01 + 3.02)

masterful + terror of the master

rose tyler: the dimension cannon (series 1-3)

the paternoster gang (series 1-5)

master! (series 1-3)

classic who

the eighth doctor adventures (series 1-4)

stranded series (series 1-3)

doom coalition (series 1-4)

dark eyes (series 1-4)

ravenous (series 1-4)

classic main range (134, 135 + 168)

companion chronicles: the second doctor (vol 1-3 / series 10, 12 + 14)

gallifrey (series 1-3)

!!! torchwood audios have moved. they can now be found here !!!

and how to access them

press play!!

if you like to listen at 1.5x speed like me, you can use an independent media player. on ios, press the 3 dots -> open with: [audio player of choice] (i use evermusic)

make and save copies of what you want even if you don’t have time to listen right now. don’t rely on this link always being here.

want something you can't have?

if there's a particular story/series you wanted to hear that i don't have listed yet, send me an ask or pop it in the comments x

happy listening! x

#this post got more attention than i expected #sometimes reblogs may be switched off to limit exposure and hopefully keep it up for longer #i have listened to less than 8% of these (yes i did the math) if there is an issue you've gotta tell me or i won't know !!!#i don't bite just send me an ask x #⚠️ i've said it once i'll say it again PLEASE save to your own device. i cannot guarantee the longevity of any file or this post ⚠️#anyways feel free to share with your friends. or your enemies. if that's more your speed #also the excel sheet i use to keep track of everything i have is now over 445 lines of data #just in case you were underestimating me #doctor who #classic who #doctor who big finish #luthqrsdw #luthqrs

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froggybangbang · 1 year

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Please reblog. i need to know if it was a statistical error due to a small pool of people, or if most people below 30 need to have a movie night with us

#Labyrinth #david bowie #goblin king #i realise I'm asking this on tumblr and the pool may be skewed with people who follow me so plz reblog for a bigger pool sample?#dance magic dance

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nyctoheart · 3 months

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sometimes I think my love for KH is fading, because idk I don’t super care about scala ad caelum in missing link. And I get so lost in KHUX that I forget I only try to understand it because the series expects you to. But idk if I would have gotten into KH if it started off as X.

but then…

I remember everyone we saved in KH3… and the new dynamics we’ll see, like aqua and axel, or returning/grown dynamics, like terra and riku. But re:mind feels like forever ago, and KHMoM didnt give us that much. I just want more of the KH characters that got me into this series because I’m just tireeeed of always trying to understand “Okay, unchained this, unreality that, true darkness was whole but it wasnt but it was, (a – b)2 = a2 – 2ab + b2” like I didnt sign up to KH for the fucking astrophysics, I signed up because I liked the characters and I miss them!!!!!

#i was going to disable reblogs but idk maybe others relate #I know it may be surprising hearing this from ME of all people #but its true #im tired of trying to understand kh #now i just want sora to laugh with ventus and terra and axel to have an awkward conversation #is that too much to ask

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isawken · 4 months

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in 1883 in the first recorded rodeo takes place in pecos, texas. in 2001 rob smets attends the PBR world finals in jeans and a sports jersey bearing sponsor logos. in 1568 the gelosi acting company coalesces in italy to perform the hot new style of live improv entertainment. in 1780 joseph grimaldi makes his stage debut at 2 years old at london’s famed drury lane. in the many, many years before any white person ever laid eyes on it, a man in what you’d now call northern arizona paints his body in black and white stripes and puts corn husks in his hair. in 1557 ivan the terrible is pallbearer to a man who walked naked in the streets of moscow. in 2017 the ringling bro’s circus announces its last show, 146 years after the titular brothers first formed it. all of these moments (and more!) have lived in my head rolling around like marbles for years now and im so happy to now have the proper method to infect your mind as well:

History of Fools is a hobby project of mine i've been working on for over a year now! part essay series, part half-assed podcast, part descent into madness, this little diddy is the culmination of years' worth of highly specific insanity. i have 4 half hour-ish essays/episodes out now reviewing the histories of:

Jesters! Commedia Dell'arte! Sacred Clowns and Holy Fools! and my personal favorite (seriously if you listen to or read any please choose this one) Rodeo Clowns!

I have more episodes planned to get into clowns proper, hoping to come out in 2024. but until then please take a read or a listen and let me know what you think!

CLICK HERE FOR FOOLS!

#a series of essays/audio recordings about niche fool-related history topics. you are interested. reblog #my dear tumblr know it alls pls feel free to correct me on any factual inaccuracies u may find. i welcome them w open arms #and an open email address and open ask box :o)#my website doesn't look the best on mobile but it is functional!#(i posted abt this on twitter abt a month ago and completely forgot to do so here tee hee oopsie)#history #neocities #jesters #clowns #clownblr

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wizardchicken · 3 months

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The mental gymnastics needed to continue calling myself cis are getting hard enough that they’d probably get a top score at the Olympics

So… no need for that anymore!

I’m just gonna embrace being trans!

I’m still trying to figure out if I want to really go through with transitioning irl, and if so when, and then what exactly am I gonna do, and so on…

And then I’ve gotta start working on who I want to tell about this…

But for now, I can at least be a silly trans girl on the internet :3

#Took me long enough to get here tbh #if anyone wants to talk more about this please please please send an ask or dm me or just reblog this and say something #I really want to talk more about this but I’m too much of a coward to make the first move #this post may look like I confident and prepared for all of this #but I assure you I am NOT #This is terrifying ngl

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ebonytails · 19 hours

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maybe im just dumb but what is the difference between kris p and kris t?

TL;DR - They are Kris Dreemurr fictives and we needed a way to differentiate them

Oh you're not dumb, don't worry! It really is a little confusing because we haven't talked about who they or we are in a very long time. I'm going to talk a lot here so you have all the context you might need! If it''s too long,, the TL;DR above is the gist of it.

For context, we are a system! You can read about it a little in our FAQ

Kris T and Kris P are TWO Kris introjects/fictives of Kris Dreemurr from Deltarune in our system.

Originally we just had Kris T who split in Dec 2018, and then when Chapter 2 came out, Kris P came into our system after that. Of course at first, Kris T. was just "Kris", but since we had a double now, we had to figure out how to differentiate between the two. We knew another Kris fictive from a different system at this time who was nicknamed P. Kris by Susie in our system, and susie wanted to emphasize who she was talking about.

SO. As a small nod to that, everyone decided to nickname Kris P as Kris P, as an inverse of P. Kris.

A little convoluted, I know!

Besides being Kris introjects/fictives though, they also look different! I made some new drawings to try and showcase their differences if that helps :3?

Their dark world forms also look different. Kris T's is simpler, with a shiny soft cape, while Kris P's is more complicated with a hooded cape, which is also described as "very comfortable"

Here's a whole Toyhouse of images of how Kris T. looks like right now! There's also his reference ! vvv

Sorry if you weren't interested in our "life story"! They're not just random characterizations (they are alters), so I wasn't sure how to answer w/o giving you some sort of explanation.

They have their own sideblogs, so if you have specific questions directed towards them, you can always ask here because we'll see it better, or you can send them an ask in their own blogs. Kris T's is @kristalpepsi, and Kris P's is @itswhattheycallyou

#ask #Anon #fictive #fictives #headspace #ebonytailsart #Because I drew something I guess???#Tumblr is going to be special because I think these images are going to be too haunted for Twitter and Instagram #Feel free to call Kris T. Kritty or Kris T.!#Please be nice to him. He is still a person and presents as trans and nonbinary both inside and when fronting #He just so happens to use binary pronouns.#This is all information they're willing to share publicly! Especially because this has all been public information since 2018 lol!#In regards to 'does this means I cant reblog art of them anymore or use their art as my icon/header?' you still can! It doesn't matter.#As long as the post itself doesn't say “do not use as...” then don't worry about it! :3 #Being a system in public/ online and having UTDR fictives is actually rather terrifying. Susie is just very brave about it and doesn't care #Hm what else.. this really brings us back to ogeeitsme.. when people would ask us questions about our system a lot.#Like 'what's the difference between Chara's and Kris's eyes?" We drew a whole graph for that hehe #From Kit #If I get too scared I may delete this.

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shadowqnights · 16 days

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*grabs a can opener*

Spill them worms

oh my gosh i started writing out an essay, accidentally refreshed and deleted it, and now i'm back trying to figure out how to word this.

i'm one of the freaks who actually likes mcd aaron and i love rewriting him. and i'm of the mind that one of the best ways to make aaron and aph more interesting in both universes (and fix a lot of stuff in aph's case) is by having them as werewolves - aph, whether knowingly or unknowingly, entering pdh as a werewolf. aaron being a werewolf in mcd. reversing their roles in each universe.

but the aph thing is a whole OTHER can of worms so specifically in relation to the dog rule in mcd. i'm super passionate about werewolf aaron. this is a crash course for some of my rewrite thoughts. strap in because this one is going to be so long i am so sorry.

in my rewrite aaron is actually not a werewolf at all by technicality since he's cursed by a member of the divine. as opposed to the other wolfkin, there's no way for him to have wolf features in his human form, no ears or tail. he's got a purely human form and a purely wolf form - albeit an unusually massive wolf, but in all other manners resembles a natural animal. he can only be one or the other, nothing inbetween.

his backstory ties very strongly into the ultima origins that you see in mystreet as well. simply put because if i start i'm not going to stop - aaron makes a sacrifice to try and save his dying lily, angers a member of the divine and is transformed into this new form as punishment only to find the efforts in vain nonetheless. cue falcon claw's tragedy.

being a wolf fits aaron to me in a number of ways - firstly that he's literally a lone wolf. he's determined to isolate himself, wander alone and unbothered. he believes that the only way to fulfill his end goal is on his own because his beef is personal. there's no need to get involved in other people's affairs. he has walls up, and while being very gruff and self-serving, has a secret soft side - usually with children. otherwise not much matters to him except vengeance and dying. he's a wandering wolf vigilante of sorts, without even meaning to. he describes himself as a broken human. to me he leans entirely into his cursed form in his grief and becomes very much animal. he barely ever speaks as a human and barely even takes that form unless critically injured/fatigued; he is nothing but a wolf. he tries incredibly hard to see the world as an animal would, but there's a frustrating shred of his human morality that forces him to do the 'right thing' - like saving aph, like saving dante. it's also just a plain interesting approach to his character that makes him more complicated

and because he's this gruff, silent old dog who's convinced he has to die alone, of course the young bright kids are going to flock to him. in this way i love indulging in the dog rule in the way that aaron is the oldest, in some ways the wisest and has lived through a lot of hardships in both human and animal form. and in that animal form he can become the perfect mentor for members of the younger cast who need his guidance. as a wolf aaron is more than anything else a survivor, and other survivors tend to seek him out of instinct. he tries to distance himself, insist that he is a lone wolf *doomed* to live out the rest of his days spiraling in animal hate, in anger, fighting and mauling and earning new scars until the day he can kill zane and then die. but that is very much the human part of him reflecting on the animal part. the animal knows violence. the human justifies it because his suffering has led him there.

aaron's dog rule functions best with others. his relationship with aph works best starting from distrust and disinterest and growing into a friendship/mentorship. because there is a canonical foundation for them to have a bond - because they are/were both lords, both once cared incredibly deeply for their chosen people, both have survived hardships and both of them despise zane. they have a mutual goal and their working together makes sense. if you're that one oomf who likes aarmau then i like to think of them in mcd as having a relationship akin to that of Wolf Children (please watch highly recommend) but as a wolf i feel he would make a great mentor for her too. in a way that only aaron specifically can deliver. i don't explicitly make aph animal, per say, the way that nicole and aaron can shift. but metaphorically there is very much something animal in her. same as dante. the both of them, to me, are younger, they're like cubs trailing at aaron's heels and after some time he takes them in, but aren't physically transformed in any way (though i have AUs where they definitely can).

they have differing relationships to him. aph certainly begins as a naive sunshine character - and as she slowly learns about her world and its history, that sunshine fades a little. she wants so badly to fit in amongst the ordinary people of phoenix drop; she works hard to learn and become one of them. even when (in rewrite + rebirth) she becomes lord out of desperation, merely thinking she's doing these people service by keeping phoenix drop alive, she's trying to be One of them. this animal side of aph to me arrives in the form of her magicks. she finds that not only does her light heal, that it is also quite literally a searing, burning light, something that can hurt. worse, that she feels a sickening rush of power, realising that she has this violent and unpredictable form of self-defense. as this naive pacifist, it offers the bridge to a new chapter of her life that she isn't prepared for; it solidifies that she isn't ordinary, that she woke up for a purpose. and that her allegiances are changing - especially in s2, in the wake of everything falling apart, everything being different and wrong, the people who went into irene's dimension with her are very much the only people who understand. she seeks companionship with aaron because she is ashamed of the feelings inside of her, that she describes as animal because she doesn't know what else to make of it. her magicks feel like an animal separate to her human self because in a way those are irene's magicks, that's irene as a distinct Piece of her, and those things are wilder than the body she was reborn in.

-> incorporating parts of loverman into this, also why aph becomes so strongly bonded with katelyn. because their magicks call to each other. fire and light. they both burn and they end up relating strongly to each other and being weirdly attracted to each others magick. they are both destructive and animalistic, it's just that katelyn is far more attached to her humanity.

aph finds aaron's silence comforting rather than disarming. everyone else finds him weird and a little bit offputting / alienating. she is rather comforted by it. she's spent so long trying to learn what it means to be human because she was born into a human body without any memories - so much so that being with aaron, who is hardly ever human, brings her a lot of comfort. in a way, she finds the most peace with people who are very grounded and well connected to the earth and nature - with zoey, kiki, cadenza, namely, and then aaron. her friendship group, excluding that of her guards, have certain connections to the earth and have very nurturing personalities. she's drawn to that by nature (thanks irene!).

and aaron specifically, who spends the most time as a wolf. when he's not fighting, he's hunting, travelling, and resting. in a human form, i feel there's not much for him to teach her because she's already been through this period of struggle in her mortal body - she's already learned from people like garroth, donna, brendan, namely in rewrite. she has people who can teach her how to fight and how to be a diplomat. she's had a number of mentors and a strong circle of friendship to guide her. she has so many human companions. but aaron is so much more complicated than that. as a wolf, i feel she would seek him out as a teacher. even on the more metaphorical sense that she feels like a broken human, and the only individual who could possibly understand or at least empathise with her place in the world is him. she wants to run wild with him, wants to be in the thick of the woods, the middle of nowhere, wants to pretend as if she could be cursed, too, as if she could find a form that relieves her of the weight of human fears. perhaps then she could embrace this power inside of her.

dante is different because its dante and he's ALWAYS different in some way. god. where to begin. okay so dante is also metaphorically animal in a way that is specifically only in reference to his relationship with aaron. he is aaron's brother and a cub to him in a way that starts out transactional. back to the loverman elements of rewrite for a second:

-> at this point aaron is almost Always using his wolf form . ignore that he was human when he saved aph because i didn't know what i was doing yet. aaron, as a wolf, still has a Shred of 'justice', hence why he finds himself so regularly saving people. because even as a human he considered the circle of life very sacred, and in keeping with kul'zac's teachings as a hunter he was very much so respectful of wildlife and only killing out of necessity rather than for sport or selfish gain (as in, hunting for food and using the absolute Most of those bodies, not taking more than needed). he was very faithful to his shepherd in that regard (until the period when he was cursed. but that's a whole other post). post-curse there is a very deliberate change when aaron becomes a little bit carried away but through it all, he is very conscious of that circle of life. that cycle. even as this vigilante figure, he's very specific with the fights he picks. he saves lost children in the woods, he mauls shadow knights & and in short he sees fit to punish the people/creatures who harm the weak and defenseless for sport, for selfish gain, because (1) that personal justice that is a part of his former worship/morality he can't shake, and (2) maybe a small part of him hopes that if he lives that way for long enough, kul'zac will restore him OR take pity on him and let him die.

he's secretly very particular. even when he can't admit it, his sense of justice is strong. saving aphmau was dubious because she was unknowingly in fer salem (southern wolf tribe) territory and was injured. but she cried for help and he answered. but specifically when aaron is hanging around phoenix drop, he's tracking a volatile shadow knight that attacks him immediately in wolf form, and that alone is enough for aaron to decide that the shadow knights (or just merely. the dudes with That scent specifically) are bad and kill regularly in mass for sport, therefore need punishment.

he sees dante for the first time and thinks of him as a bird, a prey animal, because he acts like one. he is skittish and tentative and blindly wandering through unfamiliar woods. and aaron goes ok that one isn't to be hunted. so when later he finds a shadow knight cornering the group including dante, who he vaguely recognises, the Right thing to do is to attack the shadow knight. (which happens to be gene, therefore saving the life of dante + his companions. so by extension saving aph again, plus garroth and laurance).

dante and aaron are all about transaction. aaron saves dante's life. so then when dante finds him bleeding out in the woods, he saves HIS life. the debt is repaid, but then the other does something to begin a new debt, and they become trapped in a cycle. dante kind of despises him because at that point he has such horrifically complex feelings on gene. such terrible baggage that he doesn't know if he hates him for attacking gene or loves him for attacking gene. it's weird and fucked up and more than anything he knows that he at the very least owes aaron something, so with that in mind he grits his teeth and helps to heal him. which is a slow, gradual process, because aaron has a LOT of wounds, more than just the ones gene inflicted in the fight. dante doesn't even know that he has a human form at this point - it's merely his sense of kindness to take pity on this animal that tried to (and possibly succeeded, since he has no idea of gene's fate yet) kill his horrible older brother. in aaron's weakness, he can't control the wolf, so he turns human briefly and dante realises that he's getting involved in something way more complicated than he bargained for. story of his life. still, he perseveres - and aaron is a stubborn, lonely idiot, and a wolf does not need human medicine. so dante gives up on trying to convince him to come back to phoenix drop and treks into the woods on the daily to tend to aaron's wounds. which he protests but all in all is wayyy too weak and tired to actually Fight it.

in this way they very gradually earn each other's trust and aaron begrudgingly hangs around. dante saved his life again, so now he owes ANOTHER life debt. and aaron is all about paying back debts. in his youth his love language was acts of service, his very bonding with lily was full of debts and transactions and trading.

so as a wolf he lets dante stick around and protects him. the cycle of debts continues in increasingly obsessive/codependent ways [in ways that i'm reluctant to talk about unless asked because loverman spoilers but in short aaron becomes a brother figure for dante, relieving him of the baggage left by gene.]

in this way i consider dante a cub because he's young and he's CLINGING to aaron in a way that, while still a little bit pathetic, its made better by the fact that aaron reciprocates some amount of care towards him and they take care of each other. he's a good brother. when they get close, they get CLOSE. it takes a while, of course, like a year+ to fully earn each other's trust. he's a cub in the way that he's young, barely 19 and has been treated akin to a sopping wet stray dog abandoned too many times. and in a metaphorical sense his shelter becomes an older, wiser wolf who is somehow far more kind and gentle and less animalistic than his human biological brother. and beneath that gruff exterior there is genuinely care in aaron; his care for dante specifically re-inspires a certain purpose in him and opens him up to a future Beyond zane that doesn't just involve his own death. in that way, by association, dante to me is a dog/wolf of his own, and would even consider himself as such because of his relationship with aaron. he is very attached to the idea of being non-human because of his suffering, in which i think he would relate so incredibly strongly to aaron. maybe he secretly wishes he too was gifted with a curse that allowed him to endure pain in the form of a wolf and spare him of human things like regret and remorse. and he's drawn to the mystery of the shapeshifting characters - he is enamoured with nicole at first because he is the first to pick up on her fox form.

aaron also draws dante down a path of maturity and sets his character development in motion - he becomes a bit more merciless, brutal, unforgiving, able to stand up for himself better because of aaron's influence. as if he grew up as a dog kicked down, abandoned and mistreated and neglected, and as he grows up he is taught that he has teeth, and he is allowed to use them. plus the fact that you can take dog rule dante really literally and explore his entire life through that lens but specifically i also love the idea that this pathetic human boy is so attached to his teacher/brother, so obsessed with the idea of sharing someone's blood that isn't gene's, that he fully leans into it. he is someone's animal brother. his wolf brother. his kin. they protect each other. and when the time comes aaron has also grown and while he's always been far more gentle and protective over children, he is especially fond of dante's child [ dmitri, not nekoette's rewrite self, i'm a dancole believer. ].

and in this way they kind of make a fucked up little family. dante and aph consider each other brother and sister - dante finds a new brother in aaron, who thus takes on the role of mentorship for aph.

and . and that's literally just a starter. a very basic crash course but yeah idk i approach them in different ways dependant on what AU you're asking me about. everything i've talked about here is specifically rewrite thoughts + dog rule but honestly i wouldn't be opposed to making dante a werewolf in kennel au or something. and aph as a werewolf would also be really cute and i'm a big fan since she already is one in my mystreet rewrite . one big wolf found family.

#sorry i feel frazzled this may make no snese to feel free to ask for clarification or more info anywhere #i love answering asks with giant ass essays sorry i love talking about my rewrite. feel free to ask me questions about any character anytim #welcome to beeland!#sorry this took days i was like. on and off writing this whenever i got the rush of brainworms #bee's buzzing #mcd #minecraft diaries #aphmau #dante #aaron lycan #oh yeah im insane im insane #no one is awake rn so im going to reblog again tomorrow i cant be bothered to schedule shit rn

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waywardstation · 7 months

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Thoughts on Akari's EX outfit? I love the colors!

I like it too!! I don’t love it, but I really appreciate that they went with Hisuian Samurott’s colors!

The only thing holding me back from loving it is probably where they put the darker and lighter colors. I’m a fan of character designs where headwear is generally lighter than the jacket/shirt/pants if there is going to be a contrast. And that might be because I like characters with dominantly dark color palettes, and lighter colors are secondary. And that is because it just personally pops in a more appealing way to me than a primarily light color palette with darker colors as the secondary.

That’s just my personal preference when it comes to character designs though! I would swap a few colors around, but my adjustments would make her EX’s values look very similar to her original. That might be why I still prefer the original though haha, it’s primarily dark.

For what it is though, I really like the EX!! It looks really great, just my personal taste in value dominance prefers the original ^^

#wayward’s asks #I may do a reblog of this wirh a quick edit later but I can’t right now #almost every single one of my original character designs follow this preference of mine #dark values dominate the color scheme and most light colors are secondary and almost always around the face/head #it just helps lead eyes to the face while keeping my personal design preferences #and same with this Akari #with the original #my eyes go right to her face #but with the EX my eyes go right to her waist with the wrap #cause her face is light surrounded by dark #but her body is the bigger contrast area where it’s a strip of dark surrounded by a big space of light on both sides #it just leads my eyes somewhere I don’t want it to go #I generally want my eyes to go to a character’s face

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orchideae · 4 months

Text

A little unpopular opinion on something I've seen happen more commonly throughout November/December and wanted to address quickly for my own blog: Please never hesitate to reblog anything from me. You see me reblogging a sentence starter list that you like? Go for it and reblog it from me directly without any pressure on you whatsoever to send anything into me before doing so. You like a GIF-set or musing that I reblogged? Nab it from me, it'll brighten my day to see that we share an interest in something. I like to see interaction between me and anyone who follows me. I like to see that little activity notification light up.

Honestly, it simply reminds me that we're all part of a community, and more specifically, a fandom that consists of characters and nations that we all came to love and then share that amongst ourselves. And honestly, seeing a reblog happen shortly after me but it's from the source, creates (in my opinion) an odd sense of chosen disconnect between people that can feel awkward, it's as if we're walking on eggshells as to not rub each other the wrong way. But what's wrong about going 'Hey, I see what you reblogged, I like it too!', it even gives you potential common ground to start a conversation. We're a community, and I don't know about you, but I like seeing people interact with each other beyond merely threads and notes. It's the little things that matter, after all.

#[ psa. ] seeing isn't always believing. and if you can't trust your eyes; you certainly can't trust rumors.#[ i feel like this whole 'reblog karma' rule has scared people so much into stopping with behavior that... ]#[ i think was healthy. interaction; no matter how small; makes it so much easier and comfortable for people to... ]#[ interact because you almost become 'familiar faces' through these tiny little asks. ]#[ the amount of times i've entered dms kindly/respectfully after someone's reblogged something from me-- ]#[ and the person and i proceeded to just gush about the reblogged fanart in question. or something similar. ]#[ which then makes any further ooc interaction so much easier and nicer-- the initial anxiety people may face is lessened. ]#[ because you've already found common ground. ]#[ like i don't mean to force anyone to reblog from me-- but it's like it's so obvious so often when people... ]#[ see something from you but then reblog it from the source. i dunno if it's just me but it feels odd. ]#[ it feels as if someone thinks reblogging from me would step on my toes or rub me the wrong way and i don't see?? ]#[ why that's a thing? it's so silly. reblog from me; feel welcome to do so. we all love this fandom. we all love our characters. ]#[ and each others' characters. it's why we interact; right? ]#[ any way. hi-- yes. i just mean never feel odd to reblog from me. if anything i encourage it. ]#[ i'll smile and nod at you in my activity; and you'll also pique my interest to be like 'hey! good taste 💙 ]#[ any way; i hope people are having a good weekend! ]

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