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oceanwithouthermoon · 5 months

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Talking about Saiki and SA here a bit, btw, just a warning~

Thinking about how you said Saiki was a victim of SA and you’re literally so right. I feel like people sometimes just blow right past the fact that Kusuke is like that with his brother, but I think it can add a lot to interpretations of his character. But even if it only goes as far as what is shown in canon — which I almost doubt — it still remains the fact that Kusuke is doing all of that knowing fully well that his brother can hear him. It’s literally sexual harassment.

People point it out more often with Teruhashi and her brother (back to the reasons you said, people think it’s more serious if it happens to women). But the things he does, that’s all sexual harassment. And yet when Kusuke does similar things, it’s often brushed aside. Just,,, a bit crazy to me.

(And that’s not even mentioning when people completely disregard this part of Teruhashi’s story and act like she’s one-dimensional,,, but that’s another story)

But all this to say you’re literally so right. Anyways love you mwah =^•w•^=

THANK YOU SO MUCH. I NEEDD PEOPLE TO ACKNOWLEDGE THIS MORE.

(heed the sa warning + abuse and incest warning before opening, i talk a LOT here.. im mostly just reiterating what happens directly in the manga though.. ALSO EXTREMELY LONG POST WARNING..)

I always viewed kokomi and makoto + kusuo and kusuke as like.. paralleling each other ? not sure if thats the right word, but IMMEDIATELY when i saw both of these dynamics i made the connection.. i guess since it was so clear to me, i assumed that it was so obvious and on purpose that everyone else knew too, but so many people just.. ignore it..

i think most people that read/watch saiki k have recognized the fact that most main characters are meant to parallel or relate to saiki in at least some way, (if anyone who doesnt know what im talking about is reading this, im sure at least someone on here has done a better breakdown on that, i just.. dont know where to find that..) but this particular connection is one i dont see often and i genuinely believe that its almost entirely because of the whole "sexual assault/harassment isnt as serious when it happens to men as when it happens to women" thing.. most of the fandom acknowledge that what makoto does is awful and kokomi is a victim, so why is it different when its kusuke and kusuo ??

its EXACTLY the same.. what we see on screen with the saikis is WORSE, actually.. and what WE see from these two relationships isnt the full extent of what the two victims experience off screen, and i strongly believe that its heavily implied that both kokomi and kusuo have been through much worse with their brothers than whats shown..

we have no idea what kusuke couldve done BEFORE moving away and creating the telepathy canceler (and dont say that he couldnt have done anything cuz they were kids, cocsa [child on child sa] is still a thing and still valid, ESPECIALLY since they were both kid geniuses and kusuke definitely KNEW better.. but yea, kusuo implies that hes been like that for a long time, way before we ever saw them, sooo..) and its highly likely that whatever happened that we didnt see, before or after the move, was WORSE than what he does ON screen (i honestly dont want to think about what a guy with an incestual obsession with his brother does with cameras everywhere in his brothers home..) and what we see him do is already insane..

literally using his brother to get off, manipulating him and forcing him to play the games that give him sexual pleasure.. actually, speaking of, ive seen some people say that what kusuke does isnt really incest because the only reason he uses kusuo is because hes a masochist and kusuo is the only person that can overpower him.. this is a total misfire LOL, his upbringing alongside kusuo and his relationship with him is the REASON that hes a masochist, the ENTIRE REASON why thats what he gets off to.. its not just CONVENIENT that kusuo is there to get him off, he SPECIFICALLY seeks kusuo out and forces him to do things that give him sexual pleasure.. he believes that kusuo is the only person in the world that can ever give him sexual pleasure, what about that doesnt sound incestuous?

and one of the worst parts of it is, kusuo BARELY acknowledges how weird it is.. in fact, he's COMPLACENT in a lot of the games, obedient even, being bribed into them the same way he does with simple things like bringing kuniharu to work.. this is the biggest reason why i believe the off-screen stuff is probably worse, because kusuo is obviously conditioned to think that letting your brother get off to you is just.. fine.. we hardly see him try to get away from this situation beyond simply calling him gross.. theres one moment during the cat tank situation where kusuke tries to get him to grab the limiter off of his crotch specifically so that he can see him in that position and kusuo looks terrified and cant do it, BUT its unclear whether the expression of fear was entirely his concentration because he didnt wanna break the limiter or because he didnt want to let his brother get off to that, and i think its mostly the former ? idk, i dont remember this part that well but im preeeetty sure..

he does acknowledge that MAKOTOS behavior is bad when he sees it, but he never thinks its a big enough deal that he needs to help her or anything, (except for maybe the okinawa situation) which i know is probably just for the sake of not letting the gag manga get too serious, BUT it can also be explained pretty easily by this whole thing.. the way kokomi is treated is literally the same way kusuo lives his life, even down to their incestuous brother being possessive to the point of berating their potential love interests.. (which in this case happened to be each other, kusuo and kokomi..)

so yeah, kusuo just. doesnt really know how bad it actually is ? or maybe he does, but doesnt acknowledge it because he doesnt WANT to.. him barely acknowledging it and being complacent is part of why some people dont really get that its sa and incest, but his complacency obviously plays a big part in how its effected him too, like thats purposeful.. like i said, hes been CONDITIONED not to acknowledge it..

to me, it looks like a classic situation in which kusuo doesn't acknowledge his trauma because he knows that if he did, it would change his outlook on his life, his family, and his childhood FOREVER. he would never be willing to tell anyone or ask for help on his own accord, and accepting that there was anything wrong in the first place means, to him, dealing with that issue by himself for the rest of his life.

why would he ever admit that anything was wrong if nothing would change either way? the only thing that WOULD change is HIM, and why would he want that? isnt it better to be blissfully unaware than to knowingly suffer in silence?

plus, he genuinely does love his brother and knows in the back of his mind that kusukes feelings toward him comes from their unhealthy upbringing and relationship and its more complex than just "hes an evil guy blah blah.." because he isnt really evil and kusuo KNOWS that.. actually, he might be the only person in the world who COULD understand..

so yeahhhh.. kokomi and kusuo are both CANONICALLY victims of sexual harassment.. (and incestual abuse at that..) and, by my interpretation, implied victims of sa as well !! (im not really sure where the line can be when it comes to this sometimes, like when your brother sniffs your bedsheets and rubs himself on them or gets off to you right in front of your face or tries to get you to grab something positioned over his crotch so he can see you in.. THAT position.. but i already said that its pretty likely that both brothers have gone farther than that off-screen..)

anywayyyy.. this is so important to me and i wish people would talk and write about it more instead of pretending it never happened and mischaracterizing every one of these characters, especially for the sake of a ship like i was talking about in my other post.. it sucks that people so often just cast kusuos canon issues aside..

#i really wish this was talked about more..#i referenced a really old draft to write this that i never posted because i couldnt figure out the phrasing #so thank you for giving me the opportunity to finally talk about this in detail lol #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki kusuo #saiki kusuke #teruhashi kokomi #teruhashi makoto #sa tw #incest tw #abuse tw #meows post #meownalysis

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the-sparkling-diamond-satine · 1 year

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OK for the WIP ask game, I esp wanna know more about - more than these actually, but to keep it to a manageable ask....

5. Fuffy Catholic boarding school

9. Fuffy Hope in a bottle

16. Echo Fuffy fake marraige

22. Fuffy 2020

24. Gender wishverse

Send me an ask with a title that intrigues you from my list of wip's and I'll tell you something about it or post a snippet from it.

Fuffy Catholic boarding school:

This one is summarized here, but since you asked, here is a snippet:

Buffy’s got one arm propped up by Faith’s head, leaning in so close that Faith can feel Buffy’s warm breaths on her cheek. The little gold saint medal Buffy never takes off from around her neck brushes Faith’s neck where it hangs. Faith flinches slightly, half expecting it to burn her. Crosses and holy water and medals with saints on them are supposed to hurt evil and sinful creatures, and Faith’s never considered herself to be anything but. And sure, Faith’s never gotten hurt touching any of that stuff before, but she’s also never had Buffy, the pride and joy of St. Cecilia’s school, straddling Faith in her own bed before, looking like a literal angel with her curly blonde head and her virginal white school-issued nightgown. Faith’s never had such dirty, sinful thoughts in her whole entire life, feeling Buffy’s strong thighs snug around her hips and looking up into Buffy’s green eyes, dark but with a hint of surprise, like she thought this was gonna feel wrong, and can’t believe how right it feels. Faith’s half expecting lightning to strike her dead right then and there for even so much as considering touching Buffy freaking Summers. There’s a cross on the wall behind her own head and a couple of nuns asleep three doors down for fuck’s sake. And then Buffy is kissing her. It’s close-mouthed and impossibly soft, just a gentle brush of Buffy’s lips against Faith’s own, but it’s still enough to make Faith believe in the existence of Heaven. Perhaps there’s something holy here after all. And if there isn’t? Faith tangles her hands in Buffy’s hair, kissing her back more firmly. If this is what descending into hell feels like, Faith hopes she gets to stay for all eternity. If hell is where they’re already headed, there’s nothing they can do about that now. So they may as well enjoy the fall.

Echo Fuffy fake marriage:

Summarized here. Snippet for you below:

Faith needs to move, to distract her mind from these dangerous thoughts because yeah, it is dangerous to want something she can never have, especially as desperately as she wants Buffy. She scoots around Buffy, tugging the door shut behind herself as she walks further into the room. The sound of the latch clicking into place helps hammer home that she and Buffy are now alone in this romantic place for newlyweds. This ‘sex room’ as Buffy called it. Faith flips on the lights as she passes the switch, saving them from the romantic lighting at least. It does help dull the atmosphere the staff tried to create, though only slightly. Buffy still hasn’t moved. “They think we’re going to have sex. They set this up for us to have sex in. All of this is for sex things to happen. Between us,” Buffy babbles. “Well, yeah, B,” Faith says easily, as if she weren't thinking the same thing (and feeling way less horrified about it). “That’s what people tend to do at places like this.”

Fuffy Hope in a bottle:

Buffy: hey whats up? It takes ten minutes, but she eventually gets a text back. Faith: that was the longest skating lesson ever. was starting to worry u fell through the ice Buffy: thats not even possible lol Buffy: also i didnt realize u were waiting for me Faith: i wasnt Her defensiveness only makes it seem like she really was waiting for Buffy, which is kind of weird. Maybe Faith’s some kind of friendless loser who was waiting by the phone for days for Buffy to text her back because the only person she has to talk to is Buffy.

Fuffy 2020:

Faith tries again, “Look, B—” “Faith, just drop it, okay? I’m not going back to your place. It really sucks being somewhere I’m obviously not wanted. You were right. I’m an adult, I’ll figure it out.” Faith chews on her lip, trying to decide how she can convince Buffy to come home with her. She can’t just let Buffy sleep in this park or a homeless shelter or something. Especially not in the middle of a freaking pandemic. She needs to—she could smack herself on the forehead, she can’t believe she’s being so stupid. Buffy literally told her what she needed to hear. “I missed you, too,” Faith blurts before she can talk herself out of saying it.

Gender wishverse:

My Buffy Summers is non-binary post will be posted eventually (after I finish writing it), my Wishverse!Buffy fuels my non-binary Buffy head canon meta post can be found here, and my previous answer about this fic can be found here, but since you asked, here is a little more info about this fic!

Originally I was planning to make this into a Faith/Buffy fic but that idea has been evolving. Honestly when I first started writing fic I was set on making everything Faith/Buffy, and even though I haven't been posting that long I've already changed my mindset on that haha. I like multiple ships so why not write them? And not everything I write needs to be ship-centric. We'll see where I end up once I actually start writing but currently I think this idea lives in my head as a Buffy and Anya friendship fic. My thoughts regarding Anya and gender are that she's over 1,00 years old and has certainly seen non-binary people before and would be so over the fact that people keep trying to erase them from history. Plus, Anya is aware of the Wishverse she's created. Two reasons for Buffy to reach out to Anya (even though she still kind of wants to be evil) and get some answers and help thinking through this :)

#fuffy #buffy x anya #faith lehane #buffy summers #anya jenkins #btvs #thank you for the ask!!#ask game

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flockofdoves · 9 months

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obviously there is no time that is Good or Convenient to have covid and i guess technically its good that this isn't happening to me in the middle of a time where i have more active work or school responsibilities

but also it just feels like Such bad timing in a lot of other ways

i literally Just was recovering after unrelated health problems over the past couple weeks that were making me so so fucking stir crazy i had plans to go out and really start planning my days for the rest of the summer doing things like going to rhode island again and going birding more and going to museums and stuff because i was at my fucking limit with being cooped up in my apartment recovering. but now i just gotta do that all over again for at least another 9 days from today

kinda sad about ending my summer this way. and also i'm gonna have to miss my niece's christening party when i really would like to see her again i've only seen her once since she was born :(

also there are just so so many issues surrounding my lease and roommate situation. my symptoms started on tuesday the 16th which means i should isolate til the 26th (i do not trust the new recommendations saying you can even go to work if you have covid after 5 days i think thats fucking insane and would be irresponsible of me with how extremely symptomatic i am right now)

my current lease ends on the 26th. so so lucky i don't have to move but every single thing about my roommate situation and how shes supposed to move out on the 26th is made so fucking complicated by this

because my roomate is still here the whole time i have to isolate i have to stay entirely in my bedroom outside of wearing a mask to go to the bathroom (and shutting the door and taking it off to shower or brush teeth) or quickly get food to bring to my room

and my girlfriend didnt test positive yesterday but it feels kind of inevitable considering that we sleep in the same room (and cpaps even aerosolize viruses further apparently) so its not like she can even stay in the other room for the time being while periodically checking to see if she's gotten infected

and also i put in repair requests earlier this week for issues with the apartment that preexisted me and my gf moving in but that over the past year i'd been too nervous about having maintenance come in and see how bad things were bc of my roommate until me and my gf deep cleaned last week

but the repair requests were not fulfilled within a few days and then i had to cancel them obviously once i tested positive. and so now that means i cant have maintenance fix anything til after the new lease starts... which means that we're gonna have to pay back my roommate the her entire portion of the security deposit and then pay for the repairs during our new lease for things that happened when she lived here before us...

it also kinda puts a wrench into any hopes i still kinda had of trying to reach out to anyone she knows to try to help her cat

and im sad bc i realized cats can get covid so i shouldnt even really be playing with or petting her cat over the next 10 days :(

also its gonna be so so weird bc ive already doubted that shes actually gonna move out at all and now its even more ambiguous bc like. if she ever communicated with me at all i'd find it very reasonable for her to ask to move out a little later so she doesnt have to deal with that or expose anyone shes potentially bringing to help her move or anything. but like i know shes not actually gonna communicate anything so if the 26th comes and goes and shes still here its gonna feel even weirder than it was gonna originally because i'll feel more unconfident about asserting like. you need to get out of here. when i can find a reason to understand why she'd unexpectedly need to stay a little longer

#thank god my roommate unblocked my number so my text actually went through letting her know i have covid #still kinda wondering about the possibility of her ignoring texts enough that she still doesnt know tho lol #cpost

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racetobachelorisland · 4 months

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2024 maxchael van horsey yapping

the ENTIRE Plot out of the way, there’s something so AGHFHAHGSJWHDJWJJ🔥🔥🔥🔥‼️‼️❤️❤️ about an intelligent arrogant actor who’s a perfectionist with very high morals about acting, and a nice dumb superficial reality tv star who was stunt cast as a lead having any sort of positive relationship through the dorothy filter

but it makes sense for michael’s character, not just because he’s a hypocrite, he values the person’s commitment and risk taking and focus !!! that’s what sandy had, that’s what max had!!!! even if the two aren’t necessarily good actors or anything like michael, sandy is literally one of Michael’s closest friends and michael (as dorothy) was able to form a friendship with someone you’d assume would be his biggest enemy I MEAN. evil man director, freeloader famous man RON CARLISLE AND MAX FALL UNDER THE SAME CATEGORY!! also on tour dorothy brushed off her annoyance towards max the second he mentioned reading shakespeare and got so excited so I think she’s just autism with it

( michaels a dick sure but people mischaracterize him so bad as this evil monster who spends the entire show treating his friends horribly 😢 )

but anyways john ((shout out to him for being the cast member who talked the most about his character, it saved 2019 and 2020 and 2022 and 2023 and um 2024 me cuz I just re listened to the laura heywood podcast I cant believe bi max has been canon for 5 years this year.)) BUT ANYWAYS BASED ON WHAT JOHN HAS SHARED ABOUT MAX he is presumably the only character that actually ends up forgiving michael ((chz julie is kinda up to interpretation)) which makes sense and NOT BECAUSE HES AN IDIOT but because

max didnt have to deal with as much burdens and lies michael left as julie and rita, whos relationships with dorothy were founded on womanhood. I mean after getting heartbroken and finding out the woman he was in love with and also had an infected tattoo of her face on his chest didn’t exist, Max continues Juliets Nurse with the new actress and then tries to do more acting with his newfound confidence that he gained FROM dorothy, AND realizes he still loves dorothy as michael :( the whole thing is awesome because hooray no longer dependent on your looks and body being the only worthy part of yourself ! hooray self esteem boosted ! hooray self discovery ! oh did I mention he hosts tv show after tootsie as well :D I wanna be a tv show host on day BUT as for his feelings for michael…..Painfully One Sided💔💔💔RIPMAX VAN HORN🙏

It’s hard to imagine they could maintain a friendship after tootsie in the sense that its kinda hard for me to figure out that the various scenarios I’ve thought of over the years would even be accurate considering how loud and delusional max is about his feelings, and if michael would even feel the same and how would that affect their chances at a friendship and AND. if Julie and Michael were to end up together that’d be the end of it 😭 Max seems to end up fine anyway so even if it’s a bittersweet ending, like sandys arc, michaelmaxxing ended, self respectmaxxing was achieved🙏 I need to make a separate post for the sandy/max parallels and their relationships with michael/dorothy BECAUSE THEYRE SO!!!! GOOD!!! I COULD WRITE ESSAYS

John mentioned that he tried to push for a line that would wrap up Maxs story in the end but it never found its way in and I feel like that would’ve changed the game…..Johnny Boy..Ty for ur service :3

but WUTEVER in my head dorothy and max shakespeare infodump and make out wrapped the ninja turtles blanket and my name is max and im wrapped in the same ninja turtles blanket and my dorothy isnt infodumpimg tootsie and making out w me so ima file a complaint real quick not cool bro. here is my favorite max and dorothy interaction frm the newer/and now unfortunately cut forever lines

max: you know, we should rehearse together sometime!

dorothy: sure! lets exchange numbers.

max: ….wont that confuse people trying to call us?

Edit: Ok technically he does spend the entire show treating his friends horribly

#tootsie musical #Back at it again w the problematic niche yaoi #by mischaracterizing I mean like. The reviews and stuff this show doesn’t have a fandom….#michael dorsey #dorothy michaels #sandy lester #max van horn #WHAT IS BRO YAPPING ABOUT #sorry for being a tootsier #tootsie #this is a diary post I doubt there is anyone in the world who would be interested in read in g this

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tears-0f-the-lynx · 2 years

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me bitching about someones terrible godawful need-to-use-bleach-after-reading opinions under the cut but its about bf!sh so mentions of s4 and r4p3 and shit if for some reason you open it i juST CANT KEEP MY THOUGHTS BOTTLED UP

also spoilers

EO was definitely the reason for ALs death i will agree with that /srs but he wasnt "egotistical" he was stupid and ignorant. it was evident EO felt bad that AL had to save his ass; he mentioned it several times. EO felt an obligation to stay with AL because he was older and wanted to save him, yep. half of the fucking time EO got in trouble it was coincidental and plot-driven, not inherently because of himself.

yea EO hit him awake. why it doesnt matter? because it Was EO. theyre fucking kids. theyre gonna do shit like that. i honestly didnt get the pubes thing, but it Was AL who made a joke about it first so- and yes. it Was fun. they were teens having fun on halloween. if this person Genuinely thinks AL wouldve lost his shit to some fucking pumpkins, they are so stupid. EO and AL are later seen casually talking in the same setting anyways so obviously AL got over it and was able to enjoy himself. it was all a bit of teasing.

oHHH boy. guilt trip. lol. they talked about it, they argued about it, but as far as im concerned, none of it was guilt tripping. if im not mistaken, EO says basically the Exact Opposite but i would have to rewatch that episode. other characters say so much worse to AL about shorters death than EO ever couldve.

if im not mistaken, that was the episode where ib3 and m4x kinda used AL to talk to EO about going back to japan. while AL undoubtedly wanted EO to be safe and was brutally honest, that scene is followed up by AL taking a shot because he literally couldnt handle saying something like that to EO. EO may not have known what to do, or was afraid to approach AL when he was crying. AL always went to EO when he cried. EO never went to AL when AL was crying if im not mistaken. obviously he acknowledged it. it hurt him. i wouldnt say he flat out ignored it.

i dont remember the "weak girl" comment or anything of the likes but whatever. in that scene, i think EO was being ignorant. i couldnt really tell if he was joking or not, but i dont think he was entirely serious. i really dont remember the scene very well either. my argument is weak here, i acknowledge that.

in episode 7 (?) AL kissed EO and tapped his butt but wheres the uproar? idek what thats on about lol. AND OH BOY THE COMMENT ABOUT FOX IS WHY IM HERE. ladies and gents, we got em. yes, because EO coming to AL however long after he was assaulted and hugging his Very Obviously shaking figure was him ignoring AL. EO complete brushed off fox r4p!ng him when he got physically on ALs level and comforted him in the way no one else had. ffs, j3ssic4 didnt even try to comfort AL even tho she was r4p3d as well. but no. the very impactful and popular scene of AL hitting whatshisfaces hand when he tries to reassure him only to sit down, space out, and be held like he had never been held before was in no way EO comforting AL after he was assaulted. i cant believe this dumbass said that. we liTERALLY DIDNT WATCH THE SAME ANIMEHDJDBEJ

#worthless cries #pls dont rb #god im so tushytroubled

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kaz11283 · 3 years

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Of Course I'm Here

Characters: Come on you know by now how this goes (Loki x you) (Team x you, platonic)

Warnings: None. And really if you ever see anything that I might need to able as a warning please let me know... I'm the person who forgets there are people out there that get offened by the word F*** if that is an exapmle of anything.

Summary: Mid battle and the avengers keep looking for an answer as to why the God of Lies hasnt showed up yet. Of course you have no idea but at least he proves them all wrong.

ANNOUNCEMENT TIME: hey guys Im back, I know it hasnt been long but I also know I havent been posting every single day like I was, i got into a weird little funk where I didnt want to do anything, I was just feeling completly drained, and I felt bad because I have my little and I didnt even want to play with her because I have just been so TIRED, but I'm feeling better. Work has been kicking my ass here lately and ive been working over 50 hours a week so ive literally been coming in, eatting / feeding the little, getting us ready for bed, and crashing as soon as she falls asleep. But im here now. I will probably be more active on weekends than during the week because I have more time to spend working on stuff but I will be posting also during the week just not daily. At least until after state comes. Thank you so much for the reblogs, likes, comments, follows, and messages please keep them coming! If you would like to be tagged please ask or message, and requests are open. Love you guys so much! 💚💚💚💚💚

Loki Masterlist

~~~~~

"Y/N, BACK UP I NEED BACK UP! EYES IN THE SKY!" Tony yelled from above, you and Clint stood back to back on a roof top shooting as many bad guys as you could. Clint took aim at another carrier, shooting at the engine causing the entire thing to blow up raining debris and hot metal around you.

"Damnit Clint! Farther away make sure they are farther away!" You yelled popping him on the head with an arrow before aiming it at the thing that was chasing Tony.

"Where is lover boy at? You.sent him the location right?" Nat asked into the com.

"Yes I sent him the location, no I dont know where hes at." You mocked.

"Did you send him the right location?" Sam asked.

"One time, one dam-"

"Language!" Steve chimed in causing everyone to groan. Gun shots where ringing all around you and you could here metal on metal paired with Hulk screams coming from another building over.

"Language." You mocked muting your com son that no one but Clint heard you. "I am a 26 year old woman, I think I'm old enough to cuss if I want." You drew back your bow and sent another arrow flying into another goon that had Nat trapped aginst a wall. She shot you a thumbs up before running off. You hit unmute on your com.

"Jesus, 26? Baby, you sure you don't need to be at a babysitter instead of on a building killing things?" He laughed.

"Dont worry Hawk, when we get done here I've already booked you a nice nursing home to be put into." You put your bow around you and stood on the edge of the building. "I need a better view." You looked round, the top of a taller building caught you eye. "There Hawk, we can cover a better radius from up there, get closer to the action."

"DOES ANYONE KNOW WHEN THE GODS ARE GOING TO BE HERE? WE NEED MORE HELP WERE GETTING TIRED AND OUT NUMBERED!" Tony came over the coms screaming.

"How do we get up there? Or do I even wanna know?" Hawk came to examin where you were talking about.

"Im jumping, you cant tell me that someone wont catch me." You shrug.

"GODS WHERE ARE TH- Y/N DONT YOU DARE JUMP!" Tony stopped and hovered right were you was standing.

"Then take us over there. We need higher ground, we cant cover everyone from down here." You crossed your arms.

"Where are the gods at y/n?" He asked again

"I. Dont. Know. Jesus you guys act like I'm suppose to be there keeper!" A simultaneous you are came from everone through the com causing you to roll your eyes. "Hes gonna be here I swear it! Now take me to the building or I jump. 1.....2....-" Tony grabbed you by the collar of your jacket and flew you to the building.

God these things were everywhere and you were starting to run out of arrows. After shooting another ship and causing it to blow you heard what was unmistakably pounding on the roof top door leading to where you currently was at.

"I have some univited guests about to join my party. Anyone available for some assistance?" You yanked out the two emerald green and silver daggars that your boyfriend had given you not long after you had started dating after throwing your bow around you.

"Buy some time kid, I'm on ground level right now but I can try to get up there as fast as possible." Bucky called over the com.

"Buy some time? Ok. I can do this. I work better from afar but a little hand to hand never hurt anyone, just easier to get stabbed this way." The first of the things busted through the door running straight at you. You jerked out of the way missing his staff by just a few inches. Quickly turning you flipped the dagger like Loki had showed you and stabbed him in his side causing him to fall to the ground before the next one tried to impale you.

"I have two daggers and they have freaking staffs! Back up! WHERE THE HELL AR-" you were interupted by static in the air and a bright light. The bitfrost had just opened up leaving to gods standing in front of you and taking out the remainder ofnthe bad guys. "HES HERE! I TOLD YOU GUYS THEY WERE COMING AND THEY'RE HERE." You pulled two extra coms from you pocket and gave them to Thor and Loki.

"Always a pleasure to battle beside you Lady y/n." Thor smiled takkng the com and putting it in his ear before taking off again.

Loki sauntered over to you and put his arm around you waist, you put the com in his ear as he rolled his eyes. He leaned down and gave you a quick kiss.

"You got a new outfit." You smiled at him. God the way he looked in his battle clothe always did something to you, the horned helment was a plus.

"You like it." He smirked down at you pulling you closer.

"Your wearing your horns to." You reached up and brushed a peice if hair behind his ear.

"STOP. STOP NOW. WE CAN HEAR EVERYTHING AND ITS GROSS." Tony yelled causing you both to roll your eyes.

"Quick run down, bad guys everywhere, no end in sight, and I'm out of arrows pretty sure Hawk is too." Loki waved his hand over your quiver making more arrows appear.

"I see you had to use your daggers. I am sorry for not being here. Are you hurt anywhere?" He asked stepping away from you to examin you.

"Small cut on the side, nothing I havent dealt with before, Ill be fine. You go make sure Hawk is fully stocked up and help the others. I got a birds eye view of you right here." I leaned in kissing him one more time before smiling at him and pushing him away. He kissed his two finger before placimg them over his heart and you did the same, "always." You both said before he disappered.

You could hear Thor laughing at the chaos going on and Steve trying to direct the god of thunder on what to do. You had learned earlier to just let him do his own thing and he would be fine. Tony was still trying to micromanage everything when you heard Loki mumble something in an old language and his com cut out. You had figured it wouldnt have stayed on to long though but at least you had tried. It had calmed down up on your end so you decided to finally go back down to where Clint was at shooting an arrow with heavy duty rope you glided back down next to him to watch what was going on.

"Hello, earth to y/n." He snapped his fingers in front of your face. You had been to busy staring at Loki and that damn helmet. "I dont even understand why were friends." He rolled his eyes propping up on the ledge watching as the rest of the team secured the last of the bad guys.

"Because we both shoot arrows, because we are both the best in the team, or because we both know we are the best looking one on the team so we have to stick together." You laughed jumping up so you could sit on the ledge.

"The birds can come out of their nest now." Bucky called over the coms causing you both to sigh.

When you and Clint had reached the bottom you walked over to Thor theowing your arms around the big goof ball.

"You are amazing during battle as always." He beemed patting you on the shoulder.

"As always? Thor youve only fought with her twice." Steve said beside you.

"I had a week off. Went to Asguard, spent time with the boys. Someone had to keep them in line." You shrugged like it was no big deal.

"She was amazing!" Thor went on telling the story of the fight you had all gotten into.

"Mothers been asking about you by the way dear. Wants to know if you've decided to come stay for a while." Loki leaned down and whispered in your ear.

"I think I'm leaning toward a yes. I can't stand being away from you, you had been gone forever this time." You reached for his hand as you both walked to the quinjet.

"I was making arrangements to have our room redone. I figured you would come with me." He gave you a knowing smirk as he reached up to take off his helmet.

"Leave the horns on. I have a suprise for you when we get home." You pulled his hand away from his head and smacked his butt.

"You are a little minx." He laughed chasing you into the jet while the rest of the team groaned and rolled their eyes.

"Even if you wasnt moving i would be kicking your ass out! I am so sick of the PDA between you two." Tony hollared after you.

"Leave them alone Tony, they are courting. Im just glad my brother is happy and not trying to stab me." Thor clapped Tony on the back.

~~~~~

Tag List:

@kgirardin

@sophlubbwriting

@supbeeches

@high-functioning-lokipath

#loki laufeyson #loki odinson #loki #loki avengers #loki daily #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction #loki x reader #loki fluff #loki x y/n #lokilaufeyson #loki one shot #loki (marvel)#loki imagine #loki masterlist #loki and thor

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undermattsun-archive · 3 years

Text

ushijima x fem!reader x kita | w.c 1.2k

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

a/n: omg ok so here’s my fic for the super cool + epic collab for my server ;)) i’m rlly nervous cus i’ve never written a. fic like this so pls don’t be mean!!!! but like pls leave a comment below <333 also don’t forget to follow me (or i’ll BITE U jk xD) omg omg ok and don’t forget to check out the other fics for this super epic hot collab <33333 right here kidnapped by hq !!!!!!

warnings: inane rambling, i literally did not proofread this i would take breaks and start again without checking what i wrote last so it’s defs not coherent

I was just ur every day kind of girl. Nothing special to anyone...not ev en myself. All i knew was wake up, brush my hair (and teeth obvi!!) and go out and go to university and to my part time job as a waitress ina diner where not a lot of people would go to. Anway today was one of those boring days, i woke up with my alarm blaring at 6:00 am because i have a class at 8:00 am… it’s my least favorite one too. But yeah so i got up super early and made myself apple cinnamon brown sugar oatmeal and black coffee bc i’m also kinda broke bc i ran away from home bc my parents were those snobby rich people and i didn’t wanty end up like that ya know? i put on a really simple outfit bc i was feeling lazy since i woke up late!

(we need to bring back sillly bandz! they r so much fun!!)

So i was walking to my early 8 oclock class all the way on the otherside of campus when suddenly ther e was a frisbee flying right at my face! I tried to dodge it but it still hit me right in the nose and i screamed so loud i didnt hear anything else but me screaming in really loud pain.

“Are u ok??” i grab my nose in pain but it doesnt rlly feel broken or bleeding so i open my eyes that i didnt evern realized that i had close to see rlly gold eyes staring down at me. I scrunch up my eyebrows bc im confused bc he’s wearing overalls and a straw hat? Did i hit my head or something and am now seeing things?

“I’m ok do i know u?” i ask.. despite him looking weird in his farmer outfit he looked familiar so i had to ask.

“Sometimes i go to the diner u work at after im done at the farm bc there are good mochi waffles (a/n omg wait do they serve mochi waffles at dinners? I’ve only had it from bakery xD)” he says with a really cool tone. I nod my head bc it makes sense. Before i can say thank you to him for asking how i am doing he grab my hand “please marry meand my cofarmer”

“W-w-w-what??????” i yell my heart is pounding bc even though he is really super pretty i don’t eevn remember him ever being at the diner and like i remember a lot of my customers faces bc a lot of them come back a lot.

“Marry us we will make u super happy pls it was love at first sight.” he says confidendtly (sp?) as he holds my hand tighter and tighter.

“I-i-i-i-i-i don’t even know ur name???” i whisper softly under my breath, “HOW can i marry u???”

“Shinsuke…..” a deep voice goes off behind me and i pull my hand out of his hand to look behind me, a big big BIG man stands there also wearing overalls and a straw hat and also a single wheat hanging from his kissable lips.

“Wakatoshi i have found the perfect housewife for us,, i have asked her to marry us.”

“But i’m just a normal girl from a normal world, how can i possible be apart of the world the two of you have made in the farm world?” the offer was amazing, the life of a housewife for these two perfect men that i’ve met by chance.

“She doesn’t havea choice the wedding is tonight ur marrying us.” the man who was called wakatoshi says with a very serious voice and facial expression. before i can ask hes suddenly pulling me to my feet and dragging me away.

“i have class!!” i say in protest as he continues to pull me towards a green tractor.

“you don’t need education…do you know how to sweep and cook eggs? and maybe make butter?” shinsuke asks following behind as wakatoshi pulls me onto the tractor.

“of course i can make eggs! but why butter?”

“we live on a farm darlin’ ya gotta know how to make butter.” shinsuke says and i nod my head. it makes sense.

“i can’t just leave my life behind tho i’ve gotten this far all by myself” i sigh even tho i’m comfortably sitting in wakatoshis lap i can’t let myself fall victim to their charms!!! i’m independent !!!

“give it up already your ours now…..” wakatoshi says seriously. i pout. he can’t just talk to me like that. i’m not a kid! i go to unverisity and have a job!!!

“it’s too late ur already wearing the engagement ring” i look down at my hand and gasp to see a beautiful ring on my finger.

“this cant be real?” i shake my head my head.

“we already have your dress and the venue ready.”

“what?” the big grrrn tractor pulls up to a really pretty outdoor wedding venue. my jaw drops to see my entire family, even my parents waiting.

“go in there” wakatoshi points at a tent and i nod. i walk over and am immediately being changed by two guys who look the same?

“don’t worry we r gay.”

“and twins.”

“but not gay for each other bc that’d be illegal or something and the author would get Cancelled™” it makes sense. i turn and look in the mirror and i gasp. i look beautiful. i may be an average girl but in this moment my velvet chestnut locks are curled to perfect perfection and the makeup isn’t too much or too little. these gay twins sure worked their magic!

i step out of the tent and look down the aisle to see my two farmer husbands looking handsome as ever (here’s what we look like teehee xD i know we look super cute!!)

“y/n, im sorry me and ur moms bitchy richness made u run away but please let me walk u down the aisle on ur wedding day.”

“hello my name is agayshi and i am also gay, and here to officiate your wedding.”

“wait ur gay too?”

“yeah i’m married to that guy over there in the wacky inflatable cars salesman suit but we’re both respectively fucjing one of those gay twins. any way. do you y/n y/m/n y/l/n take shinsuke canonical rice farmer and ushijima farmer au to be your lawfully wedded husbands?”

“i-“ i look between the two men. my dream wedding. my dream men. i look around at all my friends and family. i nod.

“yeah i do.”

“congrats you may kiss the bride” at the same time wakatoshi and shinsuke grab my head and manage to mash all 3 of our mouths together.

i’m just so happy.

….or so i thought.

i woke up, it all turned out to be a dream </3

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

(a/n: hey everyone sorry for the sad ending but like...r there rlly happy endings in real life?? soz i just think we need to get more realistic w our fanfics </3)

like. comment. subscribe for more awesomesauce fics like this ;) !!!

#i hate it here #i rlly do #i created this environment but god #i am in PAIN #miki mouse whorehouse #kidnapped by hq #tw wattpad

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all-hail-the-witcher · 4 years

Text

cuddling

here is my contribution for ace week! im literally squeezing this in at the last possible second (as its 11:32pm on 10/31 as i start this) but better late than never i suppose!!

i dont often talk about my sexuality on this blog, but i do identify as ace and its not something ive ever been overly comfortable with. but seeing the plethora of ace week fics on my dash this past week (mostly by @jaskierswolf, hi, hope you dont mind being tagged) has been so awesome and has made me feel so much more comfortable in myself that i had to write something for this :)

this is some gray romantic/ace geralt with some ace jaskier. warnings for mentions of dubious consent/ not wanting to have sex but doing it anyway. there is no explicit sexual content but it is referenced.

___

Geralt was a Witcher. His entire livelihood consisted of him doing things for humans: killing monsters, bargaining with sorceresses, fighting wars, protecting them from pretty much anything that could hurt their fragile mortal selves. It had been trained into him ever since he was a child. Do what the humans ask of you. It is your job.

So why would sex be any different?

Humans enjoyed sex. This was something Geralt had come to learn during his time on the path. What was even worse was that some of them especially enjoyed having sex with Witchers.

Geralt did not enjoy sex. He was not a human, and it was decidedly a human activity. But that did not stop humans from wanting to have sex with him. Some sought him out specifically, wanting to know what it was like to lie with a Witcher for a night. Others insisted on paying him for his monster hunting duties with a round. He never took pleasure in it. Sometimes he would pretend he did. He had gotten quite good at pretending over the years, learning little tricks that humans seemed to like. But the act of it itself made his skin crawl for days on end and he could feel their fingers and lips long after the marks on his skin had faded.

But he worked for humans. He couldn't deny them what they asked of him.

He assumed Jaskier would be the same. The man was certainly human, so much so that he would flirt with grass if it came down to it (which, admittedly, Geralt had only witnessed once, and Jaskier had been very drunk at the time, but still). But he never tried to bed him, which surprised Geralt. He knew he was good, if the praises of the the people he'd laid with before were any indication Humans generally needed him for a favor and then left him to the wind. Jaskier hadn’t asked him to kill a monster or help him track down an unruly mage, and it had been years at least since they had first crossed paths. The only logical conclusion that Geralt could come to was that Jaskier was waiting for him to bed him and then he would leave, just like everyone else.

The problem was that Geralt had grown quite fond of Jaskier over the years (and his incessant flirting) and while he didn’t want the bard to leave, he also didnt want Jaskier to be miserable following him around anymore. Five years was quite a long time to wait for a round, especially in human years. Resignedly, Geralt told himself that in the next town he would lay with Jaskier and then the whole thing could be over, and they could both move on with their lives.

He rented a room with one bed, as they often did, despite there being enough coin for one with two. Jaksier hardly noticed, flouncing off to play a few sets for the locals while Geralt went upstairs to prepare.

He felt the characteristic tightening of his stomach and the shakiness that always came with this particular activity, but he stripped down obediently, even talking the time to rub some of the oils Jaskier liked to much into his hair before laying down on the bed to wait.

He didn’t have to wait long. “Geralt! You’ll never believe th- whoa, were you expecting someone?” He stood in the doorway awkwardly.

“Just you,” Geralt grunted. They should get this over with.

“Me? Geralt...did you think I wanted to have sex with you?”

“Well...” Geralt picked at the blanket, feeling foolish for having to explain himself, he thought that humans should understand these things. “Humans always need me for something. And you dont need a monster killed, so I figured....” “Oh dear heart,” Jaskier walked over and sat down on the bed next to him, running his fingers though his hair. “Please do not take this the wrong way, but I do not want to have sex with you.”

“You don’t?” Geralt was shocked. “But...humans....”

“Not all humans like sex Geralt. I certainly don’t. It makes me skin crawl and I feel all weird after. So I don’t do it. I’m still plenty romantic with people, but I dont get into bed with them.” “Hmm.” Jaskier didn’t like sex either? Maybe it wasn't a human thing after all.

“What it Geralt? That was your I’m-Contemplating-Something hum.”

“It...makes my skin crawl too.” He said carefully after a few moments.

Jaskier’s hand slowed in his hair. “Dear heart,” he began carefully. “Do you like sex?”

Did he? No one had ever asked him what he wanted before. He didnt think he did. It didnt feel pleasant and he usually had to jump in a cold stream after. “No.”

“Then why did you want to do it with me?” “You’re human,” Geralt shrugged. “Humans either want me to kill monsters or want me in their bed. I serve humans, I can’t turn them down. You are a human.”

"But you dont like sex?”

“No. I’m a Witcher. It’s probably the mutations. But can still get by.” Actually, now that he thought about it, from what he remembered, he’d never been much interested in it before the trials either.

“Geralt,” Jaskier tilted his chin up to look at him and he saw sadness swirling in his eyes. “Not wanting to have sex is not a Witcher thing. Plenty of humans feel the same way too. Admittedly there aren't many of us, I’ve only come across a few in my lifetime, and I think there's a word for it but I can’t remember it right now. Sex does not interest me either, but there are far more other important things in a relationship than just sex.”

Geralt was confused. “But sex is the only thing people ever wanted me for.”

“And I’m terribly sorry about that, dear heart, but you’re with me now and I will never make you have sex with me. Have you ever- or wait, is there anything else that you dont like?”

Geralt’s head was spinning, and he was still stuck on the part where Jaskier had said that he would never make Geralt have sex with him. For the first time that evening, he felt his hands stop their shaking and something like warmth bloom inside him. “Hmm?”

“Is there anything else you dont like doing? Besides the sex bit I mean.”

Besides sex....Geralt tried to remember what came along with laying with someone. He usually blocked it all out after. “Kissing,” he finally said. “Burns my skin.”

“Alright, we’ll do none of that then.” Jaskier moved from the bed, beginning to take off his doublet and Geralt seized up for a second, afraid that Jaskier was going go back on his word, but then he reached for his nightclothes. “Are you familiar with cuddling?”

“Cuddling?” The word felt unfamiliar in his mouth.

“I’ll take that as a no.” Jaskier smiled. “Go put your nightclothes on. I think I have something that you will enjoy far better than that nasty sex business.”

So here it was then, Jasper did need him for a service after all. Geralt got out of bed and slowly pulled on his night clothes, painfully aware this would be their last night together before they parted ways for good, before returning to the bed.

“Right, so youre just going to lay on your side, yes right like that, and then I lay behind you, see? And I put my arm around you like this, and we snuggle.” Jaskier’s breath tickled his hair.

“What do we do though?” “What do you mean, what do we do?” Despite Jaskier’s words though, he didnt seem angry. “This is it. We hold each other and enjoy each others presence. We can change positions, if you want, like you can take a turn holding me for example or I could lay on your chest, but we just hold each other close. Show each other we care. This is called cuddling.”

“Hmm.” As far as Geralt was concerned, it was far better than sex. But he knew it wouldn't last. This was all Jaskier wanted from him, clearly, which prevented Geralt from thoroughly enjoying it.

“Where will you go?” he spoke into the silence a few long moments later.

Jaskier paused drawing light patterns on Geralts forearm. “What do you mean?”

“Tomorrow.” Wasn't it obvious?

“Well I’ll go wherever you’re going. Just like we always have?"

“You...you’re not,” Geralt swallowed thickly. “You’re not leaving?”

“Leaving?” Jaskier’s voice rose an octave. “Why on the continent would I be leaving?”

“You’ve got what you wanted from me, with this....cuddling business. You have no reason to stay.”

“Oh dear heart.” The next thing he knew he was being flipped around to face Jaskier. Jaskier, who had tears in his eyes that were just barely visible in the low light. Instinctively, he reached up to brush them away. “I’m cuddling with you because I care about you, because I love you. Not because I want something from you.”

“Oh.” Geralt didn’t know what to say. Jaskier loved him? No one had ever loved him before, much less cared about him or wanted him to be comfortable.

Jaskier placed his hand on Geralt’s chest. “You never have to do anything you dont want to do with me. And if you don’t want to travel with me anymore, I’ll leave. You are your own person, Geralt, even if you are a Witcher. And you make your own decisions. You wouldn't take a contract that you felt unsafe doing, so in the same vein, you dont have to have sex with anyone if you dont want to. You make your own decisions. You dont even have to cuddle with me right now if you want to. You choose what you want to do based on what you’re comfortable doing, do you understand?”

Geralt nodded into the darkness. This was all so much. He hadn't been able to make his decisions in...well ever. And now Jaskier was giving him permission to. “I want you to stay,” he whispered. “I....care about you too.” He didnt say that he thought he could love him, he wasn't ready to say that yet. And according to Jaskier he didnt have to say it if he didnt want to.

“Good. Now that we've got that sorted, come here,” Jaskier pulled Geralt into his chest, running his fingers through his hair delicately. Geralt closed his eyes, never had he felt more safe in his entire life. Who knew humans could be so gentle?

Just as he was teetering on the edge of unconsciousness he whispered, “Jaskier?”

“Hmm?”

Geralt felt a small smile tug at his lips at hearing how own language on Jaskier’s lips. “Can we do more of this...cuddling?”

Jaskier’s laugh sounded through his chest, vibrating pleasantly against Geralt’s ear. “Of course we can, dear heart. Of course.”

___

that turned out way longer than i thought it would and its now 37 minutes late but oh well.

throw me an ask if you wanna be on my tag list!

taglist: @percy-jackson-is-sexy- @barlowarts @eminasan @llamasdumpsterfire @stinastar @nonegenderleftpain @electricrituals

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cottoncandyjester · 3 years

Note

What would be your OCs ideal "meet-cute"? Like how did they plan to meet their darling in a way that would attract them to the boys? Or did it happen by pure coincidence?

love the ask! Prepare for chaos cause I like seeing them struggle

Also omg you gave a request Im so happy I think you're so cool and i like seeing you on my notifications so please like and request more stuff if you want to ahhhh💖-

This story contains: talk of stalking, yandere behavior, talk of sex (sorry it's prince...sex is always on his mind)

Theodore

Oh he's smart

He knows exactly how he wants to set up

He first saw you in your favorite bakery and from then on it was a done deal

His five years of stalking you has paid off

He knows almost everything at this point

He wanted it to be romantic and something out of a romance movie

But- he's still a bit of a dummy at times and it didn't go exactly how he wanted it to

He's played this out in his head about 100 times, he has done everything he has to in order to get everything to work out in his favor, so why did this have to happen?

His plan was to walk in ten minutes before you did at the bakery, he would pretend to be unsure of what to get then once you walk in he waits exactly two minutes before asking what exactly you would get sounding as lost and clueless as possible

out of the kindness in your heart you will respond and he will charm his way to getting your number, even though he already has it. That was the plan but you never did show up to the bakery so he panicked and went to your house to look for you

Were you kidnapped? Sick? What was going on?! He has rushed to your place now right infront of the door only for it to swing open and for you to crash into him falling ontop of him, okay?

You were frazzled and flustered, you must have woken up late. He looked at you and felt his cheeks turning red as you scrambled up and he picked up his glasses

"i-im so sorry! I just crashed into you i didnt see you"

This wasn't exactly how he expected it but he can use this, sure it wasn't the same but it was alright he can work with this.

"ah, it's quite alright. Though I'm sorry to say but my ankle isn't doing so well"

"holy shit, I'm sorry! So you need help?!"

You helped him up and as theodore leaned on you slightly he shuddered at the scent of you, absolutely delicious.

"sorry, I'm so rude I'm theodore"

"I'm the rude one here, it's [y/n]. do you live around here or something? I feel responsible so let me help by getting you home"

Theodore smiled and adjusted his glasses as he faked the pain in his ankle, it was a little embarrassing having to pretend to be pathetic but his first plan flew out the window and this was all he had left

"live just down the road, thank you for such kindness"

He smiled and knew that he wormed his way into your life, sure it wasn't how he wanted but he was in no rush.

Hikaru

He has to be careful

He's famous after all

He has an image to maintain so he can't be all creepy and stalk you

He pays people to do that

He first saw you at one of his photoshoot sites and he just couldn't help but fall

He really honestly just wants to walk up to you and say hi

But a crowd of people would be on him I minutes so maybe not

He decided to wear a hat and mask

He honestly is so self centered he just wanted to say hi and expected you to swoon

Hikaru adjusted the mask now walking into the book store where he saw you walk into just moments before, plan was to casually find you and bump into you before revealing himself and next thing you know you are jumping into his arms!

So he did just that, walked into the book store, saw you and "accidentally" bumped into you causing the book in your hand to fall

"oh I'm sorry, how clumsy of me"

"no no it's fine! Accidents happen y'know?"

Hikaru smirks before pulling down his mask while picking up the book, his eyes shining with a charming gaze as he looked at you

"how about I make it up to you with some yummy food"

"oh! You're that model from the magazines!"

Yeah baby now come jump into-

"that's sweet but I'm good it's truly fine"

Excuse me bitch?

Hikaru felt his body twitch now fighting the urge to turn his charming grin into a harsh scowl, what the actual hell!? Do you not see how hot he is?! God why the fuck did he fall in love with such a dumbass?!

"o-oh well, how about I pay for your book? I like this book as well so it's only fair"

"you like 'elmo goes to wonderland?'"

Hikaru twitched once more as he glanced down at the book you had dropped and felt his eye twitch with annoyance, why were you buying this?!

"it's for my friend's sister if you were wondering, if you're still up for it let's have that food I want some red bean buns!"

Okay..so that worked?!

Hikaru didn't understand why him being a total idiot wooed you but okay?!

"names [y/n] by the way, I'll let my friend know that you love elmo I'm sure she has more books for you"

Your joke wasn't funny and hikaru now wanted to kiss and strangle you at the same damn time. He feels so embarrassed but at the same time happy.....but the real thing he's thinking is why the hell did I fall for this idiot?!

Prince

Okay so he really just wanted to get into your pants

Like really wanted to get in there

Until he started to stalk you and saw how you acted

That's when he fell for you

He has no idea how to court anyone so he has no idea what the hell to do

This was a whole different game that he didn't know how to play

You were different than the strippers and party loving people he hangs with

You two met out of pure fate

Your friends were forcing you to go out for your birthday to a bar

The bar he worked at

His heart was about to burst

He wanted to say hi soooo bad but your friends were flirting with him hard

He figured if he got them drunk they will pass out

So he did exactly that while leaving you tipsy

He's been bartending for a while so he knows how to do this kinda stuff

Once he strikes up a conversation with you he's so happy

"so, you don't exactly look like one of my normal customers"

"what exactly does your normal customers look like?"

Prince grinned at you as he fixed you another drink before placing it infront of you, giving you a sly wink

"nothing like you doll face, you're too cute and I've never seen your face trust me I would remember a face like yours"

He prayed to God his flirting works cause that's the only trick he's got. He watched you laugh as you took a sip of your drink and he knew he wanted to marry you on the spot

"smooth, but you'll have to try a little harder than that"

"alright well, what's your name?"

"[y/n], why whose askin?"

Prince flashed a huge grin as he leaned down his arms rested against the bar as he eyed you up and down.

"prince is the name, so ever wanted to get behind a bar before?"

"won't you get into trouble for that?"

"I won't tell if you won't"

Sexual tension was HIGH

Prince was ready!

then..you fell asleep

Damn it he got you too drunk, with a long sigh he leaned back now feeling the biggest blue balls in his entire life, he decided it was time to take you home so he did exactly that.

Getting into your place was far too easy and he reminded himself that when you two stsrt dating he has to tighten security around here, he laid you in the bed before placing a soft kiss onto your cheek and leaving but not before writing his phone number and name on a napkin and placing it on your nightstand

Axis

Okay so I've talked about how dumb axis is

But he is like...reallllyyyyy dumb

Poor boy was so excited when he first met you before falling in love

He met you at an art store

He needed help on picking the right color and you popped up

Your voice made him giggle and your smell made him drool

He was in LOVE!

He wanted to meet you again

So he showed up at that art shop every single day listening for your voice and hoping to smell that amazing scent

After six months of actively going he almost given up..until

"excuse me, where are the paint buckets?"

"oh! Right this way!"

Axis perked up as he heard footsteps and the soft scent filling his nose, you! It was you! It had to be you! You were here!

He slowly followed your scent hearing you talk to the worker before hearing the worker's footsteps vanish, he was panicked! Did he look okay?! Did his eyes look weird?! He made sure to wear his sunglasses but they weren't all too tinted..what if you see his weird fish eyes!

All this panicking made him start to shake and he soon heard a voice break him out of it

"excuse me, are you okay?"

He tensed up and snapped his attention onto that voice, that angel of a voice. That voice that could make him do anything it could ever want, you were infront of him and he loved it

"y-yeah! Sorry! I'm just panicking cause I don't know which paint to buy, being blind has its limits haha"

"oh, well I can help if you need?"

He gave an excited nod and you did exactly that just like you did six months ago, it was magical

"what do you need paint for?"

"oh I just moved into a new place"

You moved? He didn't know that, he doesn't know anything about you, he wants to know everything

"oh, well I'm an artist haha, weird yeah?"

"well I don't think it's that weird, it's actually really impressive"

Dontcrydontcrydontcry-

Axis held in every tear he could as he decided to ask the age old question, the question he wanted to know for six months

"what's your name?"

"oh! Sorry! It's [y/n]"

What a pretty name, a name he wanted to now write over and over again, when you asked his name he of course gave it to you before throwing an opportunity out there hoping you take it

"if you ever need help painting your house, I can help out trust me I'm awesome with a brush!"

"I would actually like that, when are you free?"

"now."

That's how he ended up in your home, and into your life.

Yuki

He literally just walked up and said hi

That's it

He saw you and was like "oh okay let's do this now"

He has no grace he doesn't usually plan things out he just goes and see how it works out

As a person who is a mute 80% of the time talking with you was a little awkward.

He gave off a lost puppy type vibe

Yuki usually would never come to an arcade, but he wanted to win the giant stuffed cat that they had at the prize booth it was so big that they simply had a picture of it..it would make a wonderful place to sleep on

It costed so many tickets though so he had put his entire paycheck into that card to hopefully win as much tickets as he could. That's when he met you, you were absolutely killing it on one of the zombie games and honestly it looked super cool

He walked up to the machine before swiping his card and picking up the player two gun, without a single word he started to play as well. The silence was awkward for sure but it was you who broke it

"wow you are actually pretty good, you play a lot?"

"nope."

His short one word answer made you think that he wasn't really wanting to talk so you were about to leave when he simply swiped his card in the player one slot before handing you the gun once more, with a grin you stepped back up and continued to play

You would ask him questions and get one word responses back or even just sounds filled with emotions, you quickly realized that he just was a man of few words

Yuki had been swiping his card for the both of you so when the time came that he was tapped out a look of shock filled him, he was about to go out more money in but it seemed like the store was closing

"well, I better g-"

You were cut off with him grabbing your hand and pulling you to the prize counter. You followed as he gave the worker the card and got exactly what he wanted...the softest, warmest, biggest plushie ever!

As he hugged it close he watched your eyes soften at the sight of it and you were in awe. He glanced at the plushie, then back at you, then back at the plushie

With that he handed the plushie to you watching your eyes grow big as you hesitantly reached out to it

"you're giving it to me?"

He nodded softly as he watched you hug it close

"are you sure?! This is the most expensive thing in the prize corner, I don't even think you can get another one! Are you re-"

"take. It."

You nodded and flashed him a huge grin before you watched him take out a pen and write on the plushie's tummy in big letters

'yuki: XXX-XX-XXXX'

"that's your name? Yuki..well yuki I'm [y/n]! I'll be sure to send lots of pictures of our new baby! Figured we can have joint custody hmm?"

Yuki have another nod as you both started to walk out, he didn't feel mentally exhausted when he was around you. You were definitely special and he wanted to know more.

#yandere imagines #yandere #yandere ocs #oc imagines #oc x reader

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thisdreamplace · 3 years

Note

Im sad nd m feeling hopeless byond woeds. i feel directionless , alone nd..... very upset about everything in my life

Like yesterday i tried to talk to my mum abt somethng that was bothering me nd instead, she gets so much madder like she has high bp and her bp went up from yelling the crud outa me, like the only explanation other than eiyoo is she got defensive nd felt i was being ungrateful, i mean everyone else in the family stays silent and dont step forward i feel abandoned sometimes like maybe they're secretly glad shes not mad at them? Im sick of feeling this way. Idk if u know this feeling? Im not talking abt her my mum but i mean abt life in general? One real reason my mum is harsh is cuz im not doing well in life, like im not going places i want to (not literal places like metaphoricaly) bcuz of fear and social anxiety that no one ariynd me has a teeny idea of what its like. So im aware that she wants the best for me cuz i understand the everyone is u cincepf a bit. Even then its been years of same things nd issues repeating with me. For example m feeling like im gonna crack one day and when i break forever i don't even want to pick up my pieces!

Im so happy to hear ur doing wonderfully. Nd a part of me felt angry at it for a short while lol honestly like how come things are effortlesly going for u as u say, why cant i how can i experience it too, even tho my inner place is a nightmare place 😆 not a dreamplace like urs. I actually lov ur blog nd you lol dont mind me im just throwing out my thoughts, nd I fully understand how things weren't easy for u in the beginning nd everything u say on ur blog. Wish i could be brave nd not in my mind only

💀 nightmare place

i feel sad that you feel so down because life seems like its against you and you're feeling hopeless. its truly the worst to be in that sort of mindset, and i truly know you can find your way out of it. i'm glad you felt safe throwing out your thoughts here.

the truth of the matter is... the law can be difficult in the way that you really have to be willing to take responsibility for yourself. you really have to be willing to stop feeling sorry for yourself. you really have to be the one to pick yourself up and say, "enough is enough, i cant live like this anymore — i have to do better for myself." the truth is you have to want it more than you want to stay in your comfort zone. because if you dont, your comfort zone will always be waiting to invite you back in. and you will always answer the call. i would know, i lived like that most of my life. because the old way of life is comforting, its what youve always known so it makes more sense to you. you rationalize it, "this is the way things have always been." well guess what. it doesnt have to be that way. but i cant make you change your mind. only you can take that leap of faith.

you have to be willing to change before anyone and anything else does. no more waiting for life to treat you better so that you can finally feel good, you have to feel better with or without the help of the 3D.

when you say it made you angry to see how i'm doing well, i understand. i used to be similar. success stories were bittersweet. i felt happy for the person, but upset that i couldnt relate. why was everyone else able to make the law work in weeks and yet it had been months for me, and things just didnt seem to work ? why me ? that's the way i used to think.

well one day you'll look back at this type of moment and it'll all make sense. you seriously cannot keep being the same person, thinking the same thoughts and same feelings you have for years, thinking you'll get a new result. it's the opposite of what the law teaches us to be true. you've got to change and i mean really change. you must let the old story die and let the new story become your life, entirely.

you can brush off my struggle easily, but realize this. everyday i wake up and make the conscious decision to wake up and have a beautiful experience. a month ago i literally hit rock bottom; everything in the 3D i cared about so much seemed to fall apart. and i had to face that and still find the strength to say, "you know what, fuck this — i can't keep living this way." without the help of the 3D i had to pick myself up everyday, even when i felt like crumbling. i had more than my fair share of crying all day, of feeling like my heart would literally come out because of how hard i cried. considering that maybe life isnt for me after all, and perhaps i would be better off ending it there. i didnt have anything in the external world to give me hope. i had to find hope within myself. i had to look at a world that made me feel so ugly and decide its actually a beautiful world, despite the illusion. i had to take the law seriously, i had to surrender to the teachings, i had to make the art of imagining a daily practice because i decided i deserve better. and only i can give that to myself. the world cannot provide me with anything i refuse to provide myself with — this is the basics of the law. and through persistence, through not giving up on myself on the hard days, i am now singing a much more beautiful song.

when you fully accept that 1) imagining creates reality and 2) you are the only cause for all you experience... it becomes difficult to not take this more seriously. because you know how whatever you are/have within, is your experience. but you have to surrender to those truths, its up to you. i'd recommend listening to the podcast 'feeling twisty' if you're interested in what i'm saying here. mike is really the one who's explanation of the law helped me learn the importance of taking responsibility for my inner world.

im rooting for you sweet, dream place. behind the illusion of the nightmare, a dream awaits. 💖

#i am

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queenofwerewolves · 3 years

Text

Bright morning sun, warm sand, flesh breeze and the smell of the ocean...

This is the best that the beach has to offer, and no doubt our crew is enjoying to the max.. Well, most of them. Some just cant stand the Sun or will literally die if a single ray of sunshine hits them. Nonetheless, they still have fun alltogether.

Here we have our team, our protagonists: Future Hope is what they called themselves, because they are the hope of the future (corny but still a good message).

Eitch one is doing something different. Our big and buffy WereRabbit himself, Griff, is happily making a sandcastle along with the baby of the group, Muffin the Fairy, using her magic to make the little detaila of the castle. Meanwhile Rooko/Rooki, Spike, Blinkachu and Kip are having a volleyball tournament, and watching them are Spooks, Togekiss and the leader of the team.

Maria, but everyone refers to her as Queen. While she may not be an actual Queen, her actions and leadership replicate the same ones of an actual Queen, always loyal to those who care and help her, and isnt afraid to speak her mind.

Maria was sipping on a soda, watching the game, while Togekiss read a book and Spooks played Animal Crossing on her Switch.

"When the bubblegum pops..~ I want you to smile..~" Spooks sang along to the game's iconic tune, Maria looked at her and smiled. "I know you cant go out in the Sun." She said "But Im sure your cloak can protect you, you should go have fun too"

Spooks smiled softly. "Thanks but I am having fun, look I just got Marshall to move into my island!"

"Aw damn, I havent even got Ankha yet!" Maria said, the two girls giggling.

"HAHA!!! SUCK IT KITTY CAT!!!"

They turn back to the game to see Blink running in circles, celebrating another win between her and Spike, who were both a team. Kip was shaking her head.

"We get it dude, you won for a third time in a row" She said with a slight smile.

"And it was a remarcable victory indeed! You have such a wonderful jump!" "Ooh man why did we even bother playing? We suck at every kind of sport out there, we were destined to lose ever since we touched the ball!" Said the witch bird Rook, with her split personalities Rooki and Rooko. Polar opposites, one being a ray of sunshine and the other being a drag in the mud.

"Hey dont sweat it birbie" said Spike, brushing his hair back. "You werent so bad, too bad your height didnt help your jumps much" He playfully scoffed.

"Ohoho! See my dear? Even our friends know that we did our very best in this game!" "Why did we even bother? We were doomed to fail since our very birth with our stupid height, why are we even here? Just to suffer?!" "Oh dear me.. Let's get you some icecream, shall we?"

The witch birb along with the blonde kitty cat went together to get some icecream, meanwhile Spike and Blink went over to Griff and Muffin, who just finished their sand castle

Griff laughed out proudly "This is awesome! It's so pretty! And these details are so.. Detailed!"

Muffin twirled in the air "Im so happy too! Fit for a King!" She shouted proudly

"Or a Queen" Griff added, looking at Maria as she laughed along with Spooks about their conversation. He sighed.

"Our Queen hasnt been doing anything but stay in that tent with Togekiss and Spooks. While I get Spooks cant go out in the Sun and Togekiss is, well... Not really into beaches, I think Maria deserves to have some fun..." He added, Muffin looked at Maria and nodded in agreement. "You're right.." She responded.

"So how's the sandcastle?" Said Spike, chewing on a piece of gum. "Aw hey it looks nice. Why do ya'll look so down?" He then noticed that their looking at Maria, and imediatly knew what they were talking about. "Ooh I see. Queen aint doing much huh?"

"It was her idea for us to come to the beach, yet she isnt having any fun? What's the damn point then?" Blink added to the conversation, just as puzzled as the rest. "Is she just gonna sit around under the tent all day? I mean I get Spooks because she cant go to the Sun and Togekiss-"

"I literally said the same thing" Griff interrupted, seeming annoyed that the conversation isnt really doing anything to get Maria to have fun under the Sun.

"Well, what do you suggest Bunny Boy?" Spike asked, blowing a bubble with his gum. Griff's floppy ears twitched as he pondered a bit, then his ears perked as he got an idea, smirking.

"I got an idea."

A little bit more into the day, Maria noticed it was quiet. Looking up from her phone, she noticed that no one was in her view. Getting worried, she put on her flipflops, tied a swimming cloth around her waist, matching her swimsuit and walked out of the tent. She looked around and couldnt find her friends, beginning to worry.

"Griff?! Spike?! Muffin?! You guys?! Where did you-" "Woah!!!"

She was suddenly picked up by the WereRabbit, and by her side she saw all of her friends, and they were all running.

"What the hell are you-" "AAAH!!!"

"SPLASH!!!"

With a sudden movement, Griff threw her into the ocean, as the others laughed at her. "We came to the beach cause you wanted Maria! Why dont'cha cool off?" Spike added, making the laughter escalate harder.

As she submerged from the water with her back turned, panting, her voice changed..

"You... You..."

They stopped laughing, instantly knowing they were fucked.. Until she turned around with the widest smile they've ever seen, laughing her heart out.

"You damn rascals! This water is so freaking cold!" She laughed out loud

They sighed in relief, knowing they'll live for another day. And laughed once again. Until Griff got rudely splashed in the face with the sea water.

"Blegh!! Aye!! What was that?!" He sneered at her, who was giggling at his reaction.

"I know it was your idea to throw me in here, Im just returning the favor!" She said, showing her tongue.

The WereRabbit growled with a smirk "ooh now you're gonna get it, Lass!" He dived in the water, swimming after her as Maria ran laughing.

"Alright!! Cannonball bitches!!!" Shouted Spike, cannonballing into the ocean along with Blink and Muffin. Kip and Rook, who came back from getting icecream, saw the entire scene play out.

"I may be a cat, but Im down for a swim!" Kip said, running towards the ocean.

"Ohoho! Come on dear!" "Nooo I dont like the taste of salt water!!" Shouted Rooko as her body flunged towards the water.

Spooks and Togekiss, watching from afar, smiled at the fun mess that was happening in the ocean, Blink and Spike splashing eitch other, Griff was holding Maria in the air as she laughed, Kip was floating in peace as Rook twirled and spun around with Muffin.

"Such children.." Togekiss said. "Im so proud to be their friends" They said with a soft smile.

"Yeah.." Responded Spooks. "No doubt the future will be bright, as long as we're together.."

"I agree my dear Royal Of Darkness. Now, want to visit my island?" Said Togekiss, pulling out their Switch as well.

"Oh heck yeah!" Spooks smiled.

And so they enjoyed the rest of their beach day, as a well-deserved break from saving the day, changing the world..

Giving Hope, to the Future...

#FIRST ARC LET'S GOOOOOOO #fuck me typing on mobile is hard #Queen's Story

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radishaur · 4 years

Note

hey! i absolutely love how you write! can i request a zuko imagine with prompts 17 and 78 from the list that makes a reader swoon? thank you!!

Here it is! I hope you enjoy! For those who haven’t read the prompts here they are. #17 is “I think I’m in love with you and I don’t know what to do” and #78 is “Don’t pretend that you don’t feel the same way”.

- Zoe

•••

Play Pretend (Zuko x Reader)

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Part: 1/1

Summary: See Request

•••

Being Toph’s sister came with many benefits. One of which being that you always had the best teacher right next to you. She taught you everything she knew, but probably the most helpful thing was how to tell if someone was lying.

It came in handy during moments like these, where your long term enemy is standing in front of you and trying to convince you he’s on your side now.

When Zuko first joined the group, you were incredibly wary of him. You knew what he was capable of and even the knowledge that he wasn’t lying didn’t make you feel any better. People can change their minds very easily. Just because he believed he was your friend today didnt mean he wasn’t capable of changing it again. He had proven that.

So, maybe you were holding a grudge. Was that so bad? You were still sour over his betrayal in Ba Sing Se and the fact that you just maybe found him attractive was unacceptable to you. You couldn’t allow that. He was your enemy. It didn’t matter that your heart fluttered whenever you looked at him.

To compensate, you distanced yourself. Or at least you tried to. It became increasingly difficult when he was so kind and awkward all the time. It made him hard to hate. Not to mention the fact that he was going out of his way to make things up to you.

Admittedly, you found yourself letting your walls down and eventually became best friends. You two did everything together. Every chore and every adventure that Zuko whisked one of the Gaang members on. You found yourself falling more and more for him. It was consuming you.

You were desperately in love with him.

He was someone you never expected to even tolerate, let alone love. And yet, here you were, staring at him from across the fire as your heart melted. You had to say something.

“Hey, can we talk alone for a moment?” you asked him as he was putting out the fire.

“Uh sure,” he answered, looking somewhat sceptical but following you anyways.

You led him off into the woods that surrounded the Ember Island house. You took a step back from him and took a deep breath. You were still unsure if you could actually go through with it.

“What did you want to talk about?” he asked, clueless to the mental turmoil I was going through.

“I kind of, well I.......I wanted to confess something,” I admitted, picking at my nails as I spoke.

He stayed silent as he waited for me to continue. I took another deep breath. Goodness this was difficult. Was it too late to back out?

“Ok, well before I say it I just want to say that I don’t want this to change anything between us. I just need to say something so it doesn’t eat me alive,” I explained, looking at him with a weak smile.

“Y/N, you’re kind of scaring me. Is it that bad?” he asked.

“N-Not bad, per say. Just kind of important,” I sighed, feeling the ball of anxiety in my stomach grow.

He didn’t say anything.

“Ok, how do I say this,” I muttered, pinching the bridge of my nose.

Now was my last chance to back out. I took one last deep breath and decided to just rip the bandage off. Maybe if I just say it all at once it won’t be as hard?

“I think I’m in love with you and I don’t know what to do,” I blurted out, my gaze locked with his the entire time.

Zuko’s mouth flopped open and his eyes widened. I gulped. Usually that wasn’t a good reaction to hearing someone is in love with you.

“I....,” he began, but he trailed off.

“Oh dear. That was too much at once, wasn’t it? Ugh what was I thinking,” I muttered, slapping my forehead before saying to Zuko, “I guess I just want to know where I stand with you.”

“I can’t be friends with you anymore,” he said before turning around and walking hastily back towards the house.

I felt my heart sink. My eyes watered and I allowed myself to cry slightly. I hadn’t expected him to reciprocate, but to not even want to be friends anymore? I sunk to the ground and buried my face in my hands.

After that, Zuko ignored me entirely. It was the exact same way that I treated him when he first arrived. Anytime I tried to start a conversation with him he always had an excuse to leave. He wouldn’t even stand near me anymore. Everybody had noticed the sudden change.

“What’s up with you and Zuko?” Suki asked me during one of our self proclaimed girls nights.

“Oh....it’s-it’s nothing,” I stammered, trying to avoid the topic.

“Liar. You know you can’t get out that easy,” Toph smirked, wiggling her toes against the floor.

“Even I know that’s a lie,” Katara added in.

I finally broke down and told them about what happened that night. Katara was shocked and comforting while Toph was furious.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry. Zuko’s an idiot,” she soothed, holding me close as I let my tears dry on my cheeks.

“I’m gonna kill him,” Toph exclaimed angrily.

“Toph, it’s not his fault he doesn’t feel the same. I-“ I began to say, but she cut me off.

“But that’s just it! He’s lying!” she said, her arms crossed over her chest, “I can literally feel his heartbeat speed up whenever you’re close to him and I know for a fact that Sokka and Aang have been teasing him for his crush for weeks now.”

“W-What?” I asked in disbelief.

“If that’s true, then why lie? Why is he acting like this?” Katara questioned, also clearly in disbelief.

“I don’t know,” Toph admitted.

My blood began to boil. What the hell was his problem? I stood up from Katara’s hug and looked out the window. Aang, Sokka, and Zuko were all around the fire talking. My gaze hardened and I began marching downstairs.

“Y/N, where are you going? Don’t do something stupid!” Katara called out to you.

“Kick his ass!” Toph exclaimed at the same time.

You could hear them begin to bicker about their opposing viewpoints, but you didn’t listen. You were purely focused on confronting Zuko. You stormed out into the courtyard.

“Oh, hey Y/N! Want to- oh no,” Sokka said, stopping mid question when he saw the angry expression on my face.

Aang gulped and I saw Zuko tense up in fear.

“Wow, I’m tired. I think I’m gonna go to sleep,” Zuko said, faking a yawn and rushing to walk inside.

I slammed my foot onto the ground and erected a huge wall in his path, forcing him to stop. Sokka and Aang mumbled some excuse and quickly left. I marched towards Zuko who was now facing my direction but refusing to look at me.

“Why are you playing this stupid game?” I asked, crossing my arms across my chest.

“I’m not playing any game,” he huffed, still refusing to look at me.

“Then why are you acting like this! I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable by admitting my feelings for you, but you’re acting like a child. How can you just ignore me?” I asked, not even trying to hide the hurt in my voice.

“I’m not acting like a child,” he muttered, a scowl crossing his face as he looked at me.

I felt tears begin to prick my eyes. I uncrossed my arms and let the dirt wall fall back into the ground.

“Do I really mean that little to you?” I asked quietly, my voice breaking as I asked.

His scowl immediately dropped and was replaced with a face of regret. He opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out.

“Apparently, according to Toph and pretty much everyone but you, you like me back. So why are you doing this? What’s the point?” I questioned him, taking a step closer as he once again avoided my gaze.

“I’m not doing anything,” he insisted.

“I thought you were at least happy. We spent so much time together and you always seemed to be happy. Even if it was just as a friend,” I said, reaching out to grab his arm.

He grabbed my wrist before I could and looked at me once more with an angry glare on his face.

“I’m never happy,” he growled.

“I can literally feel that you’re lying,” I reminded him.

He blushed at being caught in his lie and released my hand. He once again refused to look at me. I sighed.

“Please, just answer my questions. Why are you doing this if you like me back? Because it’s pretty clear to me now that you do,” I pleaded, tears freely falling down my face now.

“I.....,” he tried to say, but his voice just stopped.

“Don’t pretend that you don’t feel the same way. Please. Just tell me the truth,” I begged once more.

He looked at me once more and I could see the tears threatening to fall from his eyes. His breath hitched when he looked at me. He took a deep breath and shut his eyes.

“Because I always hurt the people I care about. I’m a disaster waiting to happen,” he admitted.

“Do you really believe that?” I asked.

“Of course I believe it! I wouldn’t be doing this if I didn’t. I’m head over heels in love with you! I just don’t want to see you get hurt because of me,” he cried out, his fists clenched at his sides angrily.

“Zuko....,” I said, taking another step closer to him.

I could now feel the head that radiated off his skin. It was like a warm blanket that wrapped around him and anyone near it. It was one of the things I loved most about him.

I leaned up to kiss him. It was soft and short, but it was everything I had ever dreamed of. His eyes opened in shock.

“You’re a better man now, Zuko. I know you would never hurt me,” I whispered, our noses brushing against eachother as I let my hand caress his face.

He pulled me closer to him as his hands wrapped around my waist. He closed the distance between us as he pressed his lips onto mine. This time it was harder, more passionate. I melted into him.

I could hear Sokka and Aang cheering triumphantly. Toph was making fake gagging noises and Katara was giggling at the whole thing with Suki. I smiled into Zuko’s lips as I heard them, but I didn’t even care. All I cared about was Zuko.

#zuko #prince zuko fanfic #prince zuko fanfiction #prince zuko fic #zuko imagine #zuko x reader #prince zuko #prince zuko x reader

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samwrights · 4 years

Text

Two Little Lines Pt. 2

More babies!! WOW I’M SORRY I DIDNT MEAN TO MAKE A WHOLE ASS FIC OUT OF FUKATUCHI.

Er, warning? Implied alcoholism in Semi’s.

Terushima;

To say that you and Terushima lived a perfect life together would be an outright lie.

Sure, the two of you had been together since your guys’ third year of high school and you have always found a way to make the relationship work.

But you were so tired.

So tired of acting more like his mother than his girlfriend of the last four years. He hardly helped around the apartment, never cooked a meal, and if he was home and not passed out, he’d ditch you to go hang out with his friends.

It just didn’t feel like a relationship anymore; it felt like you were roommates who slept in the same bed.

And Terushima Yūji was entirely oblivious to the fact.

To say that it broke your heart would be an understatement.

But even so, you held onto the hope that you and Teru would make this all work and everything would go back to the way it used to be.

Hope in the form of crying out the anguish in your soul every night as you went to bed.

You ain’t slick though, but Terushima just doesn’t know what to do—

he’s terrified to confront you about this because what if you finally realize that he’s really just a piece of shit and you should have left years ago?

I love Terushima but lowkey I feel like he’s toxic 💀

But he tries—tries in the form of actually talking about topics that have real substance for the first time in months.

It actually goes rather well!

Too well.

It was nice to have your boyfriend back, even if temporarily.

To have human, physical contact with him was needed.

But also landed you in your current predicament—sitting on your bathroom floor, waiting for the results of the pregnancy test you felt you needed to buy earlier.

You were tired—way more than usual lately. The morning sickness, however, was what prompted you.

It was currently 2am. Yūji would be home soon from wherever he decided to go to, and the timer on your phone goes off signaling for you to check.

Not that you needed nor wanted the confirmation, but the two little lines were the nail in the coffin.

Lmaofuck.

“[name]?” Terushima calls out from the hallway. He must’ve noticed you weren’t in bed despite the late hour.

Hearing his voice brought tears to your eyes and you wished you could lie and say they were from joy.

The sobs are what captures his attention, prompting him to barge into the bathroom. “Babe? What’s wrong?”

You don’t say anything; you’re afraid you’ll say everything you’d been harboring inside for years. Instead, you point to the pregnancy test with a shaky finger.

“Wha—oh. Oh!” Aside from the three syllables that left his lips, he had no idea what else to say.

Because he knows.

Terushima knows that things haven’t been going all that great and the both of you just loved each other too much to let the other go.

“I don’t know what to do, Yūji.” Your voice is devoid of all emotion, reflecting the emptiness you’d been feeling for so long.

“The choice is yours, always. But...” Terushima comes to sit with you on the tiled floor, tugging at your cheek so that you can look at him. “This is my sign, I guess, that I have to be better. We aren’t kids anymore, shit we could be having a kid—I can’t just do whatever the hell I want.”

“You shouldn’t have been in the first place,” you seeth, “Yūji, we’ve been in a partnership since high school.”

“And you’ve been carrying the team.” At least he acknowledges it. “Now you’re literally carrying the team.”

“Dude,” you smack his arm lightly, not missing his joke. “Be serious.”

“I am. I mean it. I don’t want to lose you, [name], so I’m going to try. I want to be better for you, for both of you.”

Semi;

Was Semi Eita perfect? No.

Did you need him to be perfect? Also no.

But for the last three years, there had always been some kind of disconnect between you two regarding what you wanted for the future.

You both were incredibly supportive of each other’s respective paths—shit, you were Semi’s biggest fan when it came to his music.

But considering he often had to travel, he just couldn’t see eye to eye with you and your need for stable roots.

What was the point of spending money on a house when your two bedroom apartment suited you just fine?

He did concede to the two of you getting a dog, so that was nice at least.

But above all, you wanted to be a family. Married, kids, a yard—the whole package. He knew this, but always had an excuse.

“My career is just taking off. If we get married, I don’t want to abandon either of you—I want to be able to dedicate the proper time to both of you.” Okay, fair.

“We don’t have enough saved for a house yet.” Also fair.

“Being a parent is a full time job.” He had valid points to everything, but that did little to quell your desires.

But for Semi, you were willing to make some sacrifices.

Kinda.

However, Semi doesn’t notice the subtle changes that have come from you.

You’re working more, home less, and if you were home, you’d already have had dinner and hanging out in the bathtub while chugging a bottle of wine.

At first, Eita just thinks that you’ve had a rough day at work or something and he gives you your space.

But one bottle turns into four, and he’s had to carry you out of the tub more than once or twice.

“Babe, talk to me. What’s wrong?” Semi had left work early one day just to make sure he caught you before you started your evening ritual.

“Nothing’s wrong, Eita!” But he could hear the forced optimism along with the way your grin didn’t make your cheekbones close your eyes at the corner like they always did.

“[name], please. Don’t shut me out.” Have you ever heard Semi Eita beg? No? That’s cause it never happens.

“I swear, I’m fine! Just had—“

“A hard day at work, I know. I don’t doubt that but you’re avoiding me, babe. Just tell me what’s going on.”

You don’t know how to answer without being selfish. You know what Semi wants out of life and you had comes to terms with it. So why couldn��t you just let it go?

“I-I just...need time. To come to terms with the fact that we want different things in life.” If Semi was a crier, he would have right then and there. Watching the air leave your lungs in broken bubbles coming up as hiccups as you cried broke his heart.

“Do we? I just want you.”

For the first time in months, you didn’t pick up a bottle. After having dinner together, you finally got to be in the comfort of your loving, life partner.

Fast forward to present day—two months later you still indulge yourself in one glass of wine but no more bottles in the bathtub.

Semi’s thankful af for that 💀 even it wasn’t the ideal recovery

But he notices you’ve been waking up in the middle of the night to go throw up, and he’s starting to wonder if there were days you were sneaking them in.

“Eita, I swear I stopped doing that.” He’s giving you benefit of the doubt, trying to come up with other potential culprits.

There were days when you would PMS bad enough to make you sick.

But never for more than a few days—you were entering week 2.

“I’m calling the doctor,” he declares after you’d hurled for the third time that day. When he sees your hesitance, he adds, “I don’t think this is normal withdrawal. You never quit cold turkey, so I just wanna make sure you’re safe.”

Semi Eita’s intuition is both a blessing and a curse.

Blessing, in the sense that he was 100% right in regards to you needing to see a doctor.

Curse, because the two of you found out that you were pregnant. And while the two of you were doing much better than you were a few months ago, the “talk” about your future had never resurfaced.

“So, what are we going to do, Eita?”

“Well, I suppose I’ll have to consolidate my studio to make room for a nursery and I’ll probably have to start working from home part time at least to help you out—“

“Wait, what?” Why did he make it sound like you were keeping the baby?

“Well I’m not gonna leave you to do this alone, [name]. It’s my kid too.”

“Semi-Semi, you don’t want kids.”

“Yeah, but I want you.” He sounds so sure, so confident, that you aren’t even sure if the man beside you is really your boyfriend. “And by association, that includes our baby.”

Futakuchi;

Oh my god.

Why—or rather how in the fuck did this happen to you?

Well, you know how it happened. You did have sex education when you were in high school, after all.

But you and Fukatuchi always used condoms—there was no room for negotiation on that.

Part of you wishes you would have broken off this hook up arrangement a long time ago

But you know you’re lying to yourself because the two of you just meshed so well.

Almost like a real couple, but you knew that a relationship was the last thing he wanted.

And now, you sat on your bathroom floor with your head buried on your knees after throwing the pregnancy test that revealed two little lines of positivity.

Well, fuck.

You start dodging his 2am calls, passing it off as you had a paper or a lab that you desperately needing to finish.

Kenji isn’t buying it. He knows you’re always on top of your schoolwork.

“Why are you avoiding me?” Comes a text in broad daylight—something comepletely atypical of Futakuchi.

Avoiding turns into ignoring as you’re almost three months pregnant.

To which he calls out with another text send before booty call hours. “Alright, this is getting ridiculous. Whoever you’re fucking now can’t be better than me. Just answer me and I’ll prove it.”

Blocked.

Another weak goes by and, surprisingly, your pregnancy has been relatively smooth. Even if it did suck going through it alone.

A part of you missed Futakuchi. Not that you’d ever tell him that. But you tried to tell yourself you missed the D and nothing else.

But you missed the way he’d hold you overnight, occasionally brushing hair out of your face almost endearingly. You missed the warmth, the lust fueled kisses that you swore were almost loving.

Only to remember he was always gone before you woke up. He was only a booty call, and you had to remind yourself of that.

So why the fuck was he at your doorstep in the middle of the afternoon on a Sunday?

“Why the fuck did you block me?” He snarls, barreling his way into your apartment. You were so thankful that you were wearing an oversized hoodie and that you weren’t showing that much yet. .

“Dude, get out. Obviously, I blocked you for a reason.”

“Oh no, you don’t get to get out of this so easily. You would have told me if you started seeing someone else—“ his wording slips, he knows it, but Futakuchi can’t bring himself to fix the statement.

“We weren’t seeing each other in the first place!” The words sting him like rubbing alcohol on a fresh wound.

You try to usher him out of the apartment but, thanks to you being 16 weeks along and much weaker than him, your efforts are futile.

“You’re so cute when you play hard to get.” He retorts, wrapping his arms around your waist and picking you off the ground to carry you both out of the door way.

But as soon as he does, you’re immediately prying yourself away—fearful that he can feel your hardening belly. Fighting him off, however, seemed to make him squeeze harder. “Kenji, let me go! Fuck!”

He notices the use of his first name. He notices the flailing. But most of all, he noticed that your body felt different, even underneath the plush cloth of your hoodie.

He lets you go, unceremoniously dropping you into the ground out of shock because he finally is putting the pieces together. “You’re pregnant?”

“Get out, Kenji.”

“So you didn’t wanna see me because you’re pregnant? I’m sorry, I don’t quite understand the logic here,” his tone is snarky, painted with a vicious bite, “unless you were hooking up with someone else at the same time is me, there was no reason for you to keep this from me.”

But he knew that you weren’t. He knew by the way you’d clutch at his chest lovingly after sex that part of you longed for a real relationship with him.

And by the way it took everything in him to not stay through the morning, Kenji knew that somewhere along the lines, he wanted it too.

And he planned on telling you the last time he called, just before you started avoiding him.

“There was only you.” You answer quietly to the implied question.

“So, it’s mine.” He states bluntly. Losing your voice, you only nod. “You know,” he starts again slowly after you’ve both nodded off to a silent lull, “I started texting you in the middle of the day because I didn’t want you to think it was just about sex anymore.”

“What do you mean?”

“I actually wanted to give us a try, but I wasn’t sure if you’d break things off if you didn’t want to move forward, and I didn’t wanna risk finding out.”

“And now, instead, you’re finding out that you’re going to be a dad.”

💀💀💀 I-

Haikyuu!! Tag List - Let me know if you’d like to be added!

@hihiq @dreamyjaems @tamcitrus

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tartagliaxx · 3 years

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first off, hello 🤷‍♀️ anon! sorry i missed you out

and secondly, dw, marius is my favourite too lol, he reminds me a lot of my younger cousin who i lived with when i was younger. i was always the one who took care of him and marius calling me older sister just set off so much memories of my childhood. the both of them are also vv similar in personality, attention seeking, playful and artistic so i always see him whenever i look at marius.

artem is probably my second favourite ngl, ever since i read his ssr where he was jealous and got drunk (what a good combination lmao) i just grew so soft for him. at the end of the day, he's just a vv soft sweetheart who's insecure that we'll leave him :(( i have like 3 ssrs at lvl36, two of them are artem cards and the other is luke. i vibe with luke too bc i love the childhood friends trope, it's top tier. and as for vyn... i have vv mixed feelings abt him. i feel like he could so easily see through me if he was real and i'm just like, how about no. he's rlly pretty though, like rlly pretty.

*major spoilers*

and you've finished the archon quests!!! personally, i feel like the ending felt a bit rushed(?). it's weird bc i thought the resistance war against the raiden shogun was supposed to be the center of the story, but it just devolved to us helping yae with the entire war being swept to the side. and i already knew somebody was gonna die, and as soon as i saw that teppei had become the captain, i just knew.

it's interesting bc i would love to explore what happened to la signora and scaramouche to make them so disregarding of human life. like, i don't like them, but i want to understand their minds. it's sad to read signora's artifact's background honestly. and the fact that her crown said she used to be called rosalyne, that she had perhaps once led a more innocent and naive existence. i dunno, to me it seems like a good ending for her honestly, she had already lost herself after her lover's death and brings pain to many others, i don't think she can rlly return to being her again.

and honestly, a lot of people are talking abt scaramouche not telling signora he already had the gnosis and saying that he orchestrated her death, i don't rlly think so. i feel like he's just that apathetic to human life, even if it's someone that stands on his side, he just doesn't care enough. it also says how he never got along with anyone, not even his fellow harbingers, so i don't know why ppl expect him to seek out someone he doesn't like just to warn her of danger.

i vibe with scaramouche and la signora as the antagonists bc they're good antagonists, but as characters, well. other than the fact that they're pretty, they have like one likeable trait and that is their loyalty. they would do anything for the tsaritsa even if it cost them their life. i'm rlly excited to see what the tsaritsa has in store for us in the future.

considering our sibling is nicknamed 'the prince/princess', i wonder if there's gonna be a day where we're gonna have to go toe to toe with them. if we had them backed them into a corner with no way out, i wonder if they would kill us. it would be an interesting twist if we could actually die, but i feel like the protagonist halo will prevent it lol and i'm sorry bc god, this is so long.

— r. anon

marius. that’s the tweet. man,, you dont realize how in love i am w him?? like,, this man was literally my only hope when i fell horribly sick. i cant w myself now that i’m hearing it w my own voice. it must be nice to remember the good ol’ days… i despise my cousins and i dont have siblings so i dont really have that sort of connection w him. to me, his onee-san is just a joke? a petname? idk but it simultaneously makes me so mad and giddy just like childe’s existence does

i like vyn bc his vibes are sus but at the same time, he’s cares abt our mental health 🥺👉👈 no one’s ever said shit like that to me… jokes aside, luke is seriously threatening his spot bc of his blushing bs like pls 🤲 i’m so weak for that shit give me more. artem makes me soft too like,, he keeps mentioning that he trusts us and he’s just…. HE’S A BIG TEDDY BEAR THAT BLUSHES AT LIKE ACCIDENTAL HAND BRUSHES GRRRR. in conclusion, i love them all.

but man,, give me ssr luck… literally, im in pain…

now that the excitement’s worn off, i can now judge things properly. i think that… the pacing is horrible. like the plot is good, genuinely, but there’s just,, so much to explore abt this. if you think abt it, this is the climax and yet we didnt get much. scratch that. we got a lot but it’s all underdeveloped that it felt like nothing. we go to sangonimiya, got promoted, became captain for like, one sec before we are sent onto an investigation that didnt really produce any results bc app teppei alr knows everything? and then the delusion thing is a good plot point but it’s not really explored? just… a lot of things are left unexplored and i think that story wise, a lot of the possible lore explanations went down the drain. it would’ve been nice if we saw more abt the rebellion and if we had gotten to know whats the real deal w the commissions but eh… idk… i would’ve rather done more quests abt this whole storyline than like… do that whole dance w the three people who lost their vision in 2.0.

if im going to be honest, la signora is such a wasted character. like maybe her death was just for the shock factor or maybe it’s to prepare us for more harbinger encounters in the future.. idk but she’s such a good character from what we’ve seen but we know jack shit abt her and her motives. we know a little from the artifact set but beyond that, what do we have?

precisely! that’s how i feel abt this whole thing when we’re talking seriously. like w ei, i dont really agree w whatever they’re doing but i want to understand why they do the things that they do. everything has a reason and their psychology is just interesting to me.

i think scaramouche’s nature makes it easy for him to disregard human life. call it arrogance or whatever but ultimately, he’s seeing himself as smth above all these people bc he’s more or less capable of standing toe to toe w a god. why should he bother telling signora? it’s not like he gains anything if he does. i think that when he got the gnosis, he’s just ‘well she dies if she dies. who cares abt that? i dont have any need for incompetent colleagues anw’ i agree and i dont think he orchestrated her death but at the same time, he just allowed it to happen too.

as for signora, i’m actually surprised? for the most part, i think that the harbingers took their posts for selfish reasons. for scara, it’s to entertain himself and pass time. for childe, it’s to fight and grow stronger. for dottore, it’s to conduct dubious research w/o anyone stopping him. i expected signora to have some similar motive like power or money but it seems like she does actually believe in the tsaritsa? it would be very intriguing if signora’s main motive in becoming a harbinger is simply bc she is loyal to the tsaritsa and her will. bc in contrast, i think scara and dottore are more loyal to the fact that the tsaritsa can give them what they want, not bc they actually like her. actually, idek if they’re willing to die for her lol. like i wouldnt be surprised if they suddenly abandon post in a life or death situation but who knows…

in any case, they are very good antagonists. i like yo think that the tsaritsa isnt as bad as the game portrays her to be… of all the gods, she’s the one im looking forward to the most but… haha… what version would that be….

i’m almost certain that they’ll make us fight our twin maybe before we face the unknown god? if one of them dies, i would be very sad. like legit. but knowing mhy, well, our twin is almost 100% a walking death flag.

anw i’m shutting up rn— i also spoke too much kahdjabdhakbsjansb—

#˗ˋˏ°• letters from cat island •°ˎˊ˗#˗ˋˏ°• from my darling : r •°ˎˊ˗#inazuma spoilers

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babyloniastreasure · 3 years

Text

right so i just got done crying on and off for the first three hours of my day and i think i deserve a bit of unloading into the internet about it

dont mind me i just,,,dont have a support system anymore lol and i need some kind of fuckin release. feel free to ignore

so the last week in particular has been extremely rough and today I almost asked to go to the hospital in the hopes of like, idk. getting some sort of help. I have never been this depressed or hopeless before in my life and I’ve never had so much nothing as I do now. I lost all of my friends and my only support. I don’t have anything to look forward to. I look at my projects and my art and I can’t stand them because everything has memories attached to people who hate me and want nothing to do with me. People who have ignored me for five fucking weeks after telling me “We want to fix this.”

i’m hardly sleeping. im constantly exhausted. im physically nauseous because i cant eat from the stress and anxiety, granted i remember to eat at all or have the energy to get up to get anything in the first place. emotionally im an absolute wreck. I can’t focus. nothing is enjoyable. there’s nothing TO enjoy, because everything i had before was everything they took away. I’ve been left in the dust after they told me they still cared. so clearly that was a lie. if they cared they wouldnt have left at the drop of a hat like that

Even my family has noticed that i’m not okay and they’re starting to ask questions. i feel bad every time i brush them off but I cant let them know how bad things really are. i cant tell them that every hour i have to fight the urge to hurt myself again. that every time i have a second of free thought i think, hey, wouldn’t it be so satisfying to make yourself bleed again? and yes! it would be satisfying! but that’s not a pit i want to fall into again. it had me for years and it took even more years to break. and even though I have the awareness to not go through with it and can recognize it’s not actually going to help in the long run, it’s so exhausting when that’s my first go-to solution. And like yeah I usually have those thoughts anyway but I’ve had such a great system of friends and people I love who love me also that it was easier to get past. There were people there for me who cared and because I knew they cared I could get through the rough patches. But now I don’t have those people. I don’t have any support. There’s nobody who cares about me. So then my loneliness gets to me and i get even more depressed and anxious and I keep spiraling, and those thoughts get worse and harder to fight off. it was those thoughts of intense “lets hurt ourselves really badly :D” that made me want to go to the hospital. I literally had the thought of “If I go to the hospital and they say I’m not severe enough to be admitted, I’ll just grab a pen and stab my leg to prove to them I need help.” Which is neither good nor healthy, but it would be so easy

instead i ended up crying for three hours and started thinking the circumstances that lead me here

and like. i will admit, and i have admitted dozens of times, hundreds of times to myself, that I made a mistake. I know that. I told them that. That was the first fucking thing I said. all i can think about is that singular, one, individual, tiny little blunder. and how despite me acknowledging it and coming clean with it and trying to talk about it, it was blown up and out of proportion and thrown in my face. they took my misstep and every single one of them twisted it and manipulated it into something far from the truth, something that painted me as a terrible person, as a secret asshole, as a huge toxic influence, as a deceitful and unappreciative person. They all threw out everything about our friendship in favor of ignoring what I’d said and assuming something far from the truth, the truth I laid out for them no less.

and then when i asked if i could clarify and communicate, they told me no. then blamed me for not communicating!!

thats all i ever tried to do! was communicate

From day one the group said hey if there’s a problem, be open with it and we’ll talk about it. we communicate to solve problems because we’re all friends and cherish each other.

what a load of shit.

i tried to communicate. I laid out my problem and then everybody else got involved, said I wasn’t allowed to talk about that with them, then they called me back like some kind of court and judge and jury and told me because I didn’t communicate, I was being kicked out. That’s not fair. I wasn’t treated fairly. I wasn’t even allowed to clarify whatever the hell they thought. They straight up told me no, you can’t talk about this with us. That’s not communication. That’s hypocritically shutting me down.

“Communicate with us Jask!”

“Okay I will send communication”

“Op! You’re not allowed :) We agreed you can’t talk to us :) You’re being kicked out :) Oh But Don’t Feel Unwelcome We Want To Fix This.” Then they all fuckin. moved into a space without me in it. That’s not welcoming. That’s exclusionary. That’s not communicating either. I’ve been handed a double standard that I can’t do anything about because I’m not allowed to even say hello to these people

How does anyone expect things to get better if I’m not being given the chance I was promised? its been. five. weeks. I’m ? so fucking tired and sad and alone, waiting every fucking day in the hopes that someone is going to actually talk to me again. then I finally pass out in near tears at 3am because another day has passed with none of them caring enough to even ask if im okay

and like. i desperately want to talk to them. i dont know what id say but. i dont know. i dont know. im not allowed to, for one. they made that crystal fucking clear. but again what would i even say?

do i say im sorry? i apologized dozens of times and it never made a difference, they ignored my apologies from the start and im certain they ignored the ones at the end too. and im terrified of saying sorry to the only person who really matters in this situation because im certain she’s going to cut me off if i even breathe in her direction

do I say that i miss them? what’s that going to do? it feels manipulative to say that. like hey pity me into talking to me again? i cant do that. im sure none of them miss me anyway so why would i put myself on the spot like that

do i admit im afraid to talk to them? again that also feels, bad, because the last time i admitted a feeling it drove them all away in an instant. and like also that feels like im backing them into a corner where they have to respond. and i dont want to force that. so it feels like talking is making the same mistake that made them kick me out. and like. what if...talking really does make it worse? what if talking is what ruins it even though talking is what they told me they want?

again there’s the double standard. be honest and communicate, but if you’re honest and communicate you’re rejected outright and made into the bad guy.

at this point its been so long

and i’ve deteriorated so much

i dont know if like. i just. i dont know...if more deterioration, if more waiting, and more dashed hope is worth it ?

i dont even know if they still want to repair things. what if they dont? what if they never did? what if they lied? what if they sit in their little group and talk poorly about me? what if they made bets about how long it’ll take me to leave or unfriend them like my isolation was some sort of game? what if they think i hate them? what if they really DO hate me? what if they moved on and want to forget about me? what if they regret knowing me at all? what if they wish they never knew me? what if they’re happy without me? what if

oh boy i started crying again

what if this entire month of waiting and crying and wishing and grieving and hoping and loneliness was a waste of time? what if this was all for nothing? what if i never get to talk to them again? i. man. i just. i really really really miss everyone. i miss them so much. i miss them so fucking much. i dont know what to do. I m. fuck. im miserable. i wish i hadn’t said anything i wish i had kept my mouth shut i wish i never tried i wish i never did any of that i wish i had my friends i wish i could go back i wish i could talk to them

if i didnt say anything at least i’d be happy and id have everything and i would have my best friends in the whole world and id, fuck man thats really it, id be happy. im so fucking awul

im so. i. i cant see the scvreen i need to go wash up and stop

#hello void its me ya boi #back again with a new hit single #It's Not A Relapse If You Recovered Six Years Ago #by fall out boy #tw/cw for people who are curious about this ramble #tw self harm #cw self harm #tw intrusive thoughts #cw intrusive thoughts #but also general self loathing and crippling loneliness

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