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#like do you see the pain in that second screenshot
thranduel · 8 months
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You're right. I can be better than him.
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luvhughes43 · 3 months
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so it goes | jack hughes
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[journalist!au masterlist⭐️]
the previous part is linked here !
word count: 6.5k
jack hughes had thin curtains. you would think that a 22 year old millionaire would invest in good curtains, but alas here you were. the sun shone into his room, and you could do nothing but groan as rays of warm light illuminated your face and his. 
you swore jack was a cat with how completely unbothered he was all the time. he’d happily lay and soak up the sun, not bothering to twist away from the light now encasing the room. you look over to your daughter, who slept exactly like her father. leighton was sprawled out on her back, completely content as the sun shone off her.  
“you need better curtains,” you mumble, too awake now to fall back asleep. jack snores lightly in response, and so you move to drape one of leightons baby blankets over the top of her bassinet to help shield her from the light. 
“where u goi-ing?” jack's speech is slurred, and you watch with butterflies as he stretches out across his bed and paws at the empty space where you once were resting. It felt wrong to want him. nothing had happened last night, and yet you were wanting him as if it were two years ago and you hadn’t broken up with him. you wish one of you had been smarter and been the first one to pick up the phone. 
speaking of phones, you pick up yours only to see a slew of messages from friends. you click on claudia's first, and your heart immediately drops.
claudia: i think vivienne was talking about you and jack on her podcast??
claudia: idk she said Jack may have cheated and now ppl are going crazyy
claudia: this is genuinely insane when I catch vivienne…
you: did she mention my name?? did she say anything about leighton ?
you wander out into the kitchen, perching on an island stool with your lip between your teeth. 
claudia: link
claudia: no she didn’t drop names but people are digging. some of jack's fans on twitter are putting the pieces together and speculating that you're the ex but it hasn’t gotten out yet. 
you: wtf
as soon as you send the last message your phone rings with a call. “hello?” 
“what are we going to do about this?” claudia's voice rings out through my speaker and you hastily turn the volume down. 
“well, there's not much that I can do right now”
“uh, you can sue her ass! hello!” 
“sue her for what?
“i don’t know… defamation?” you put claudia on speaker and then swipe up on the call. you do a quick search on twitter, and by screenshots and transcripts it's clear the podcast was solely focuses on jack and whether or not he cheated. “i’m not going to sue her,” you sigh and claudia groans in annoyance. 
“why not?”
you take a second and pause, “well if i sue her everybody would know that i was the ex and also, i don’t even think there’s legal grounds for-”
“okay jack can sue,”
“i don’t think anyone needs to sue,” you reply, setting your phone on the countertop so that you can make yourself a coffee. hopefully jack had some pain meds because your head was starting to throb…
“i’ll talk to Jack about it, but things like this go away. i’m not going to risk leighton getting exposed to crazy fans and to be subjected to vivienne's publicity”
“vivienne has already damaged that little girl's life,”
“and so I'm not going to let her do anything else! if vivienne speaks on leighton then i'll look into my legal options. but no, i'm not going to let her get any more of my time. i need to focus on my daughter, and my family, so if some influencer wants to go on the internet spreading lies then so be it! i’m done with her. I can’t handle any more than i already have,”
claudia's silent on the line and for a brief second you're afraid she’s hung up the phone. “claudia…?”
“she’s going to get her karma. she can’t be let off the hook forever”
“oh, trust she will. but i’m not going to have a hand in it,”
⋆ ★
vivienne
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liked by oliviajade, alisha, alix_earle, and 267 092 others
vivienne as promised… some exciting things are coming your guys’ way! follow viv212 to stay in the loop! 💆🏼‍♀️🍾
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oliviajade cant waittt!! <3
alisha youre stunnninggg ! cant wait to have you on the pod!❤️
user01 ahh so excited to see what u have in store viv!!
user02 we know what u did!!!
user03 ?
user02 don't question me.
claudiasphotos posted 2 years ago !
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Liked by ynuser, jackhughes, and 581 others
claudiasphotos yn 📸🥂
tagged: ynuser
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ynuser love you!!! thank you for the incredible photos🫶
jackhughes ❤️‍🔥
newest comments
user04 jacks heart?? the tag?? is this his ex gf
user05 wait what
user06 claudia is yn’s friend! they both follow each other
user05 maybe yn just modelled?
user07 how tf did u guys find this acc? Im crying there's no way😭😭
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⋆ ★
when jack found out about the podcast episode he was beyond pissed off. vivienne telling everyone that he was a cheater was one thing, but spreading those lies knowing that she helped keep him away from his daughter… he had never felt rage quite like it. 
“i’m getting lawyers involved,” is all jack says to yn when he passes her phone back to her. “i don't want her speaking about us ever again,” jack’s voice is steady and firm. 
“what are you asking the lawyers to do?” 
“sue her, make her take down the video, i don't know they’ll find something,” jack rambles, pulling out his own phone from his pocket.
“i just want to make sure that she doesn’t speak about leighton,” you say, deliberately choosing not to say vivienne's name.
jack looks away from his phone to make eye contact with you. “i swear i’ll make sure of it,” 
“thank you,” you respond simply, cradling your head in the palm of your hand. when was this nightmare going to end. 
⋆ ★
“you’ve got to take the video down,” viviennes manager, louis reiterates for the tenth time. 
“well, no” vivienne sasses as she scrolls through her social blade. “it’s pulling in insane numbers i’m not taking it down because of one complaint,”
“lawsuit, it’s a lawsuit vivienne” louis sighs, cursing himself for even taking influencers on as clients. 
vivienne sighs dramatically. “i dated jack for months, the video should be my compensation”
“his lawyers want you to sign an NDA,” 
“well i’m not signing or taking down anything,” 
theres a tense silence for a minute before louis groans in frustration. “he doesn’t want you talking about his kids,”
“kid. singular. he only has the one,” 
“can you stop being difficult? you’re going to lose more money than you’ll gain if you don’t just settle with jack. delete the video, and sign the NDA that his lawyers are going to send over,”
“but-”
“but nothing! your brand is dropping next week. if you delete the video now people will be tuned into your next moves,” louis explains his business plan, even though he’s mentally cursing vivienne in his mind. 
“fine.” vivienne stubbornly admits defeat as she switches off her social blade and logs into her podcast channel. 
⋆ ★
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⋆ ★
it was the beginning of december now, and jack’s schedule has picked back up now that he was back to playing. as well as the busy schedule, vivienne had finally signed the NDA jacks lawyers had sent over, and with her podcast episode scrubbed from the internet all was well for the moment. 
on jack’s days off it wasn’t uncommon to find him at his ex-girlfriends place, which is why when y/n got off work she didn’t bat an eye that jack was chilling on her couch with their baby in his arms. 
“did you pay the babysitter?” you ask absentmindedly as you shrug off your coat and let your work bag drop to the ground. 
“yes i did! isn’t that right leighton? daddy paid the sitter?” jack coos, eyes never straying from the little girl in his arms. leighton giggles loudly, her little hands smacking at her dads cheeks who grins in delight. 
“thank you!” you call out as you round towards the kitchen. “are you staying for dinner?”
jack gets up off the couch and settles himself in the kitchen. leightons little hand grips at her dads shirt, the other tugging on his finger. “do you mind?”
“no,” you reply softly, and when you look up from the pantry you catch eyes with jacks. you immediately feel delighted and delirious at the sight of him (looking handsome) with your girl resting happily in his hold. “leighton, do you want daddy to stay for dinner?” 
“dada!” leighton squeaks, and both yours and jack’s heads whip towards the small girl. 
“did you just say dada?” jack giggles, his face lit up with pure joy.
“dada!” she says again, wiggling in his grasp. 
you gasp, “our baby’s first word!” and rush to be by jack’s side. he looks up at you fondly before using one of his arms to bring you closer to his side. “leighton! say it again, say dada!”
leighton doesn’t respond this time, just giggling happily at her parents' happy words and sounds of encouragement. “she said my name,” jack whispers sappily, and when you look at his face you see tears line his eyes. 
“she knows who her daddy is,” you smile tearfully, leaning your head against jack’s who leans his against your chest. 
“i’m so happy i get to know her,” jack’s voice is quiet as he gazes at his daughter. he still wasn’t over the fact that he missed your pregnancy and the first few months of leightons life, but hearing his daughter call for him certainly helps ease some of the sadness. 
you don’t reply to jack’s comment, knowing that there’s nothing in the world that you can say that would erase any of the past. so instead you brush your hand through jack’s hair, and enjoy the happy moment. 
⋆ ★
vivienne
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liked by viv212, alixearle, and 137 008 others
vivienne so beyond excited to announce that my haircare brand viv212, is being released next friday! please follow the viv212 account for updates, posts, and product info before the first launch! i love you guys so much! mwah <3
tagged: viv212
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alixearle loveeeee
alexandracooper Cannot waitt!!
user08 AHH VIV!! <33 
user09 saving up as we speak🫂
user10 another influencer brand… we do NOT care!!
⋆ ★
jack’s voice rings out through your phone's speaker, his face half in view as he brushes his teeth and gets ready for bed. you guys were just talking nonsense now - you had both put your daughter to bed a long time ago but jack didn’t get off facetime like you had expected him to. 
you were both distracted which if claudia asks, is your excuse for staying on facetime with him so late. because really, you were catching up on work and it just so happens that jack was talking to you in the background. 
“do you think if i started reading now then my brain power would double?” jack asks absentmindedly through a mouth full of toothpaste. he spits, “quinns doing it and he says he feels smarter. but i don't know,” 
“i don't know about double… but it’d definitely help!” you tease, looking up from your mounds of documents to catch jack pouting at you. 
“that's kind of mean!” he replies as he rinses off his tooth brush. “but whatever, what are you doing for the holidays?” 
you watch silently as jack pulls his phone off the hotel bathroom counter, and tosses it on his bed. you stare at his hotel room ceiling as you reply, “my parents are going on vacation so i’m just gonna stay here. do you have any plans?” 
jack picks up his phone - shirt noticeably gone - before he settles himself in his bed. “my family’s gonna fly in to jersey. quinn’s coming too. it’s just easier with our schedules and luke and i being here already,” he responds, and you nod along to his words. you missed the hughes family. they were so unlike your family growing up. their parents were present and not always gone for work, and it felt so nice to be around siblings who weren’t constantly at each other’s throats. 
“that’s really nice,” you hum. “i have a few days off during your break. you should pick a date when we’re both free for your family to meet leighton,” 
“mom’s so excited,” jack chuckles. “i keep sending her photos and videos but it’s never enough,” 
“your mom’s so sweet,” you smile, leaning your head in your palm as you look at jack. “she texts me everyday just to check in and wish me well,” 
jack smiles back, and you would pay any amount to know what he was thinking. “quinn’s excited too. luke keeps teasing him about how he met the baby first,” 
you roll your eyes - that was such a luke thing to do - and before you can reply there's a sharp succession of knocks at your door. 
“are you expecting someone…?” jack asks with a frown, and you shake your head. 
“not that i know off… one second,” you walk towards the front door and if you had brought your phone with you you would have seen the worry and concern etched on jacks face. 
you look through your doors peephole, before shouting a quick, “it’s just claudia!” which causes jack to visibly relax. 
“just claudia” the woman in question mimics as you finally open the door. “who are you talking to,” 
“jack,” you reply, and claudia rolls her eyes dramatically as she pulls her shoes off and wanders over to your phone. 
she waves at jack, before telling him that you have to hang up. you barely get a good-bye in when she’s hanging up the call and turning towards you with a grin. “you're still talking to jack? at 9:30pm on a monday…” she teases, and takes your spot at the counter. 
“we were putting leighton to bed!” you refute, ignoring the knowing looks your best friend was sending your way. 
“uh-huh,” she shakes her head. “you’re unbelievable!” 
“no i’m not! that’s my daughter's father! who, by the way… was her first word,” 
“yah yah, if auntie c were easier to pronounce she’d call my name first,” claudia laughs before composing herself. “but seriously y/n, you guys broke up for a reason. you can’t just forget all about that now that you see him with the baby,” 
“i’m not getting back together with him! it’s different now. we’re just friends,” you defend pathetically, knowing very well that you were already re-developing feelings for your ex. 
“i just want you to be careful,” claudia stresses, grabbing a hold of your hands and pulling you into the chair next to her. 
“i wasn’t in the right headspace last time. i was insecure and i-”
“he was still liking other people’s posts and staring down models babe, just be careful please,” claudia reiterates. 
you nod, knowing that she was ultimately right. “we have better communication now. we’ve grown,” 
 “whatever you say!” claudia wraps up the conversation, before diving into the reason she actually came over. “okay, but i logged into my photography account and people are starting to connect the dots that you’re, well… you”
“what do you mean?” you question, picking up all of your work documents and placing them back in your bag. 
“there’s a few instagram comments speculating. jack left a heart comment on one of my posts about you when you were still dating, and his fans have just found it now. do you want me to go private? delete the comments? i don't know,” claudia explains, pulling up her photography instagram and scrolling through the comment section of said posts. 
you think for a minute, before responding simply, “keep it up, i don’t really care”. claudia nods and logs out of the account. 
⋆ ★
drama.alert 
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liked by trevorzegras, and 11 913 others
drama.alert people have finally received their viv212 hair products after a massive delay in shipment, and unfortunately the product is causing their hair to fallout :/ despite being asked to comment, vivienne nor her team have responded to the accusations. not the best way to start a brand is it? what are you guy’s thoughts?
tagged: vivienne, viv212
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user11 whoever buys haircare from an influencer deserves it lowkey🤷‍♀️
user12 yikesss😬 looks like the products were rushed and there wasn’t a lot of time to get the formula right… i hope everyone who lost hair grows it back quickly. what a shame. 
user13 i honestly can’t believe she hasn't spoken up yet. the people who bought her products were all fans so this is just soo disappointing. she better apologize and start refunding people soon or she’s going to lose A LOT of loyal fans and viewers. 
user14 YUP! this! and did u see the pr reviews? lotss of acting going on lol. you can tell that nobody likes the products and it's obvious as to why! very messy and not good at all. 
user15 trevor? wtf are you doing here??😭
user16 he stands on business
user17 trevor is so damn messy liking this im cryingg
user18 who tf is trevor?
user17 jacks best friend lol 
user18 ohh that's so nasty..😭
vivienne
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liked by mikaylajmakeup, tanamongeau, and 68 002 others
vivienne i hope u guys are loving all the products! let me know if u guys got anything💐
tagged: viv212
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viv212 😍😍✨
user19 yeah girl we did get products… AND NOW MY HAIR HAS STARTED TO FALL OUT!
user20 this is so out of touch. you’ve ruined so many peoples hair!! apologize!!!
user20 youve really shown ur true colours lol.
user21 posting this as if u haven't ruined so many of ur fans hair… wow..
user22 ignore all the hate viv! I know u just haven't seen the reviews! take all the time u need to respond <3
user23 bffr she's just money hungry and dgaf if she ruins her fans hair for money. shes weird af
⋆ ★
if you thought work was rough before - with all the bad articles you were given- you weren’t prepared for what was waiting for you on monday. after a peaceful weekend with your babygirl and your best friend claudia, the last thing you were expecting was to receive the worst case you’d ever been assigned. 
“y/n, we need you to cover social media drama today,” your boss had said. there were a million headlines rushing through your mind, from small scandals to non-disclosure disputes, you hadn’t even considered you’d be assigned to write about… viviennes new brand. 
“i mean, are you fucking kidding me?” you whisper-shout to claudia through the phone. you were pacing inside the girl’s washroom, disbelief written across all your features as you stare perplexed at the folder in your hand. “her brand is making peoples hair fall out. and i have to write about it… this is a joke. this actually can’t be real,”
“are you even allowed to write about her? with jack’s NDA and everything?” claudia asks from the bathroom stall at her work. 
“i mean, it was just about leighton and my identity, and the whole jack cheating thing, i don’t think it applies to this,” you're beyond stressing. the story had to be finished by lunch and here you were, pacing the bathroom borderline having a panic attack. “i think i’m going to pass out,” 
“okay breathe! breathe!” claudia's voice was loud and clear on the other line. “you’re just going to write the article with indifference, and everythings going to be fine!” 
“indifference? she fucking kept jack from finding out about our baby and harassed me?” you seethe, stopping in front of the sink to splash your face with some water. “this article is going to be so biased,”
“regardless of your history, she's an asshole. i mean she’s literally causing people’s hair to fall out,” claudia states, flushing so her coworkers don’t get suspicious of her long bathroom break. 
“i’m just going to write it and i’ll call jack once he's out of practice,” you settle, knowing there is really no way out of your work. even if you told your boss you had a history with vivienne and that there was going to be bias, they wouldn’t care. they just wanted the story posted so they’d garner as many clicks as possible since it was going viral right now. 
“okay, good luck! love you,” claudia says her goodbyes, and with a quick i love you back, you hang up on your best friend and prepare to write. 
⋆ ★
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you had called jack after his practice, but with the articles deadline hastily approaching there was nothing you could do to delay writing the article. jack of course understands, offering a quick, “i’m sure she won’t read it anyway,” before he was called back into whatever a hockey job required on the daily. 
once the article was published on the newspaper's website, and vivienne hadn’t outright harassed you, you take a deep relieved breath before continuing with the rest of your day. 
⋆ ★
of course, vivienne the lurker had seen y/ns article about her hair products. she’s seen every little message and video about the whole situation, and so as tempting as it is to find y/ns number and send her a… compromising video of jack, she resisted. instead, she took her anger out on her manager who insisted she sign an NDA in the first place. 
“you made me sign that stupid document! now i can’t even say anything about her! she's slandering my name and brand!” vivienne yells, fuming as she paces around her office. her manager, who was sitting on one of her chairs, rolls his eyes. 
“you wouldn’t be able to say anything regardless of the NDA. you know you’re in the wrong with the whole, y/n-jack-baby situation. and plus, lashing out at journalists won’t do you any good when you post your apology,”
“it's not fair!” vivienne whines. “what am i supposed to do? she’s just going to get away with this?”
“your interns and i have worked up a statement for you to record. you should probably try and get ahead of this now before it's too late,” her manager finishes, placing a small packet of papers on vivienne's desk. 
“whatever,” she huffs stubbornly, leafing through the small apology packet. 
⋆ ★
after a rough two weeks, it was finally time for the rest of the hughes family to meet baby leighton. ellen and jim were beyond ecstatic, carrying armloads of gifts for their granddaughters first holiday season. 
the family comes to visit after leightons nap, so for the grand reveal you sit the family down in your living room and bring your daughter to them. “awh… she’s so sweet!” ellen immediately starts to tear up as you slowly place the tired baby in her arms. “leighton baby,” she coos, finger tracing leightons little nose as the baby looks up at her. “she looks just like jack when he wa a baby,” 
“she’s perfect, guys,” jim speaks next, gently holding little leightons hand in his larger one. 
quinn sits quietly just taking in the sweet moment. he remembers the night jack first called him, panicked and lost about the whole situation. he was just so glad everything was working out for his younger brother, and to see jack become a father? it was surreal. 
“i don’t think i want to let her go,” ellen laughs softly as tears spill down her face. jack discretely wipes away his own stray tears as he watches his parents fall in love with his daughter. 
“that’s how i felt when i first met her too,” jack laughs weakly as he presses the corner of his sleeve into the corner of his eyes. you stand close behind him, rubbing his back comfortingly and he leans into your touch. every time you were reminded of what happened, you felt such a strong pang of guilt. like it was somehow your fault that jack didn’t get to experience the pregnancy, birth, and first few months of his baby’s life. 
ellen passes the baby to her husband, and then slowly makes her way over to you. she holds out her arms, and you easily walk into them. “you did so good,” she says, and all of your feelings bubble to the surface as you softly cry. 
“i’m really sorry,” you whisper to her and she only holds you tighter. “i should've tried harder - i thought that he didn't want to be in her life,” you gasp through your tears. ellen squeezes you and whispers reassuringly in your ear. she was always so kind to you and it made you feel sick sometimes - this family loves so thoroughly and effortlessly, something you missed from your own parents. 
when your calm enough, you remove yourself from ellens arms. jim was now cuddling leighton and quinn was leaning over his shoulder. luke was teasing jack about something, having already met leighton a long time ago. when jack notices you're no longer hugging his mom, he grabs hold of your hand and gently soothes his thumb across the back of your hand. 
you spend the rest of the evening in your apartment surrounded by family. 
⋆ ★
ynuser
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Liked by jackhughes, trevorzegras, claudia, and others
ynuser leightons first holiday season🥹🤍
tagged: jackhughes
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jackhughes to many more!❤️
colecaufield did you get the gifts i sent? 
ynuser yes! leighton loves all the habs merch!
jackhughes but she loves the devils more!
trevorzegras cant wait to meet her!❤️
_quinnhughes lee is the cutest!❤️
claudia loveee😭😭🫶
user1 happy holiday sweetheart! 
jackhughes added to his close friends! 
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⋆ ★
after viviennes less than impressive apology, her fans quickly gave up on the star. people who were only invested in vivienne for the jack hughes drama, grew bored, and angry fans were boycotting viviennes videos and social media platforms to show the influencer their disappointment with her behaviour. she lost thousands of followers, and she was absolutely pissed off. 
behind the scenes, her friend emily was fuming. vivienne had promised her a shoutout on her pages in order to boast the girls social blade, and with all the recent drama vivienne kept pushing the dates. so, emily did what she thought was best.
REDDIT SNARK PAGE
user455595654: vivienne aiden sent nasty messages to jack’s ex girlfriend while she was dating him from random instagram accounts. here are some of the tamer ones lol. she drunkenly confessed to me one night and i got her to send me ss to keep as collateral incase she fucks things up as usual. so there's that
jack hated you so bad that he couldn't stand being a father to his child... and you know that he wants to be a dad in the future. gonna make him a dad and send u the pics. know ur worth nothing
he never wanteddd you... and know he doesnt want his baby
happy birthday to your baby! thought i'd send u a message since we know jack's not.
crazy that you get to look at your babygirl and know that she was abandoned. probably hurts
he's all up on me :)
⋆ ★
“did you want to take any of the clothes leightons got for your house?” you ask jack as you fold leightons laundry. jack’s family and friends went a little overboard with the gifts, and so now you were left with dozens of little onesies and clothes in various different team styles. 
jack glances over at you and nods, and you can’t help but wonder what’s got him so distracted. he’s barely taken his eyes off his phone in the past half-hour, and even though it was none of your business you were starting to worry. 
“do you have any preference?” you follow up, hoping to get at least a response. 
“uh,” jack tears his eyes away from his phone and takes a deep breath. “i’ll uh, whatever you think,”
you sit in silence for a moment, thumbing quietly through your daughter's pile of clothes before deciding to question jack. “okay, what’s going on is there-”
“did uh, did vivienne…” you pale immediately at his words as your heart starts racing. “the messages she sent you uh,”
“what-”
“someone posted them online and i just - they got sent to me and i need you to confirm if they’re real of if someones just fucking around,” jack finishes shakily, and you sit in shock as he passes his phone over to you with unsteady hands. 
there were so many messages, each taking you back to when you first received them. you remember the panic each time a new one came in, how you kept blocking viviennes accounts and how a new one always replaced it. you nod slowly, and jack breathes in. 
“i’m going to- i-” he stutters, cluelessly trying to piece together a coherent plan. 
you pass his phone back, and slowly focus your gaze onto jack. his hands are trembling, and his jaw keeps clenching as he scrambles to make sense of what he’s been reading. “why didn’t you tell me it was this bad?”
“i’m sorry,” your voice is quiet and jack has to strain his ears to hear you. the familiar pang of guilt wells up in you again and you so desperately wish that you had just told jack the full truth. that there were dozens of more messages, and that you had been receiving them for much longer than you had let on. that you received instagram follow requests from accounts impersonating your coworkers and friends in attempts to bait you to accept them. you knew vivienne was borderline stalking you, but you didn’t want to worry jack further. you witnessed his reaction to the first batch of messages, how he gagged and cried and blamed himself. you shouldn’t have hid the rest from him, but you didn’t want to be the one to expose him to all the hurtful things you were dealing with. you wanted to put an end to the past and to move on, but it seemed vivienne and whoever was in her close circle were determined to keep you hooked and battered. 
“is there anything else? i want to know everything,” jack replies, his hands twisting together as he fidgets. you nod slowly, and jack looks sick with worry as you beckon him to sit down.
you take a deep breath before pulling out your phone. you still had all of viviennes messages saved in your dm requests, and you click on one of her burner accounts. “she uh, sent me these pictures after i had given birth,” you explain with a shaky voice. when you pass over your phone, jack sees all the lewd pictures his ex had sent to you. pictures of the two of them, cropped so you couldn't make out the faces but it was still so blindingly obvious. some of the pictures were tame, jacks back to the camera as he cooked with a simple caption “he’s so sweet to me❤️”. others not so much - dark lingerie, jacks hands wrapped around viviennes body and cupping her boobs. a picture of his head resting against her naked chest, her hand buried in his hair. it went on and on, all with annoying captions talking about how he was hers and that he didn’t want a family. 
the worst picture though was of an unused pregnancy test sitting in the palm of viviennes hand, “he’ll love our baby!❤️” . 
it took awhile to go through everything, and jack sat unusually quiet as he switches between different message threads. “i, i don’t know what to do,” jack admits after you had showed him everything. 
“there’s nothing that you can do,” you reply simply.
“i didn’t get her pregnant,” he states, completely disregarding your reply. “she was just being cruel and trying to bait you or something-”
“jack i know-”
“and you know that if i knew about leighton i wouldn't have abandoned her, and those pictures, i didn’t know she was taking half of them let alone sending them to you, i just-”
you place a hand on jacks arm, silently urging him to stop explaining. “i know,” 
“i’m just- learning about all of this for the first time-” 
you let your hand trail down jack’s arm, and then you slip your hand into his. you squeeze twice, and then run your thumb along the width of his hand - a habit you picked up when the two of you were dating. jack squeezes back. 
you don’t have time to say anything else before leightons soft cries spill out of the baby monitor. “da-da,” she whines, and when you turn to look at the monitor you see her thrashing around in her crib. 
“i’ll get her,” jack says with a gentle tone as he squeezes your hand one more time. 
you cuddle into your throw blanket, completely and mentally exhausted from the night's events when you hear jack’s soft voice through the monitor. 
“i’m always gonna be here for you okay? dada will always be here,” 
“i love you my sweet girl, always.”
 ⋆ ★
he had liked her. he had actually liked vivienne when they were together and the thought makes him feel sick. 
jack had first met her two months after his breakup with y/n. it was way too soon in his opinion - but his teammates were relentless and tired of his moping around. so, instead of picking up the phone and dialing y/ns number he had agreed to meet the girl everyone seemed to think would be a good match for him. and she was at first, it was simple and there were no complicated feelings. jack didn’t promise to be anything, and vivienne was fine with that. there was no pressure to stay hidden, they went out and had fun. not that y/n didn't go out, but there was a clear difference between both girls and jack wasn’t mad about it. 
that didn’t stop him from thinking about y/n though. he still had a photo album dedicated to their pictures together, and he still had her favourite music neatly organized in one of his playlists. he never deleted the list of her favourite things from his phone, never unpinned the addresses of the new museums, art galleries, and coffee shops they wanted to try. jack hadn't done anything at all, instead he let himself drift and he found some comfort in a girl he wasn’t sure he even understood properly because really, there were two sides to vivienne aiden and jack didn't have a strong grasp on either. 
now that he was with y/n again, or at least raising their daughter together, he can’t help but feel the urge to get to know her again. he wanted to do everything a boyfriend would do, but the timing was always wrong. they were parents first now, and it was way too soon to start a relationship up again. 
plus, they broke up for a reason. jack would be the first person to admit that he was in the wrong. liking other girl’s picks and lingering on girls in public… meanwhile he had the most amazing girl he’d ever met on his arm. he felt like such a fucking idiot, and ruminating on those facts on the drive back to new jersey seemed like a constant these days. his communication was awful too, not apologizing and not realizing the problems sooner. now he faced those consequences, driving an hour each way to spend time with his daughter. he should be there all the time, or they should be here - whatever. 
traffic stalled, and jack sat in uncomfortable silence. no depressing country song would even come close to how awful he was feeling right now. then when he got home he’d be faced with luke and his family, all doped up on all the quality time they were fortunate enough to scrape together between everyone's busy schedules. he was so tired, and everything just seemed to keep piling up. he didn’t want to hide anymore, he was tired of vivienne dictating his life and making y/n feel awful. 
therefore a week later with your permission and before jack boarded his flight for his roadie, he posted a simple but effective instagram post. 
jackhughes 
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liked by trevorzegras, colecaufield, dawson1417, and 361 299 others
jackhughes baby’s first holiday season❤️
view all comments
trevorzegras does she love the duck teddies i sent?
colecaufield little love bug🐞
dawson1417 my best girl !
_alexturcotte dads a dad🫡
holtz_10 bring her to the rink when were back
_quinnhughes best duo💯
lhughes_06 tell everyone who her favourite uncle is (it's me)
nicohischier happy holidays!❤️🎄
user24 WHAT THE FUCK?????
user25 JACK?? DAD??? IM SO CONFUSED WTF
user26 this has to be a joke
user27 im crying so hard is he actually a dad?? this is my worst nightmare omfg
user28 congrats on the baby hughes! being a father is hard work but its rewarding!
user29 who’s the mom??? vivienne?? 
user30 no its 1000% his ex. look jacks name up on twitter and you’ll find all the threads!
user31 omg… 
user32 im in disbelief i think i passed out what the ..
user33 this HAS to be yns baby omfg. If u compare the backgrounds of these photos it’s literall her apartment
user34 ? how tf do u know what her apartment looks like?
user33 it’s the same background in her friends pics of her
user34 that sounds genuinely psychotic im sorry!
user35 DAD JACK DAD JACK DAD JACK
everything had already gone viral with vivienne, and there was nothing else for jack to add to the public speculations aside from be truthful. so he worked behind the scenes to protect his family, and made it known he wasn’t hiding or playing anymore. 
vivienne got what she deserved, and her career would surely be over with the massive amount of hate she received, and jack knew it too. the countless voicemails she left told him enough, and with every swift delete and the final press of the block button - he felt a massive weight lift of his chest.
-
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910 notes · View notes
cinnamonest · 3 months
Text
Genshin x Reader - Silent Treatment
Okay so this was for an anon a while back that requested Childe + silent treatment, so 1) I got carried away and wrote the same prompt for several others, and 2) I lost the original screenshot of the ask I was going to post this with, sorry anon, but I have the content for it at least :’)
(includes: Childe, Xiao, Albedo, Heizou, Cyno, Kaveh, Kazuha, Xingqiu)
//this is mostly very lighthearted but there's still implications of yandere content. Some mild pain, Childe’s contains very mild nsfw, there might be indicators of fem reader somewhere in here, Kazuha’s and Xingqiu's are a little darker so both of those are at the bottom
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Childe
“Hey.”
The second time he said it, he waved his arm to catch your attention, as if under the impression you somehow didn't hear him, despite being trapped to the confines of the same small room.
One little bedroom, far too small at that, a temporary lodging whilst on the ship’s return voyage home. Four days, which you were about halfway through at this point.
You were thoroughly convinced it was some sort of trial imposed upon you by a higher power. The sort of grueling test of perseverance so common in tales of legendary heroes, through which they'd become stronger, or reach some well-earned reward for their virtue.
Unfortunately, you had a feeling no such reward awaited you.
“Hey…”
The third time, it was more like a whine, he slouched over in the chair on the other side of the room before, after another moment of pause, setting aside whatever oh-so-important paper he was reading (those identically-masked soldiers were always handing off important things he was supposed to sign, but he never looked over them for more than a few minutes), and walked over to where you sat, needle in hand, mending his clothes after he got them torn for the umpteenth time, no doubt doing something completely unnecessary, after very specifically requesting he be more careful, and— well, it was one of many reasons why you were so very irritated.
He waved his hand directly in front of your face. “You spaced out or something?”
You clenched your jaw, exhaling a huff of frustration through your nostrils before jerking your head away, returning to your work.
He bent his knees slightly, crouching down to get at eye level with you, but you kept your gaze fixed, refusing to make eye contact.
Even though you kept your gaze to the task in your hands, he was still directly in front of you, and thus you could still see his face go through the stages of reaction. First a slack-jawed confusion, then eyes widening with realization, and then — much to your dismay — you saw the corners of his mouth turn upward into a sly, eager grin.
“Are you ignoring me?”
You gritted your teeth, eyebrows furrowed, poking the needle through one side of the cloth before reaching around to pull it through, making sure the action was harshly done and thus conveyed your frustration.
Which was, predictably, taken as a confirmation.
“Awww. That's so mean.”
His tone was obnoxiously gleeful, playful even — you were hoping for a negative response, not whatever this was. You tried to conceal any reaction yourself, knowing he'd only be satisfied if your irritation showed on your face.
“But, you picked a really bad person to try that with, you know. I'm pretty good at being annoying if I want to.”
The immediate retort that came to mind — that he could be very annoying even when he wasn't trying — took all your willpower to refrain from speaking aloud. You grinded your teeth.
“Hmm…”
You didn't like that sound. He was contemplating something, that couldn't be good for you.
His hand latched onto your wrist, forcing your work to a halt — at least he had the decency and forethought to specifically grasp the needle before yanking the whole thing away from you, setting it on the bedside table. Likely messing up your handiwork, you thought with ever increasing frustration.
Before you could move away, the mattress shifted and bounced with the sudden added weight as he moved onto it behind you, grabbing you by your arms, pulling you back against him. His arms wrapped around your body, firmly pinning your own arms to your sides. He then rested his chin on your shoulder — you could feel the smile on his face as the side of his face brushed against your neck.
Ah. So that was the tactic. The message, unspoken as it was, was clear — he had no intention of letting you move until you spoke to him.
You clenched your jaw and closed your eyes, refusing to give in.
A minute or so passed that way, likely testing your reaction, waiting to see if you'd give in so easily. The unfortunate thought occurred to you that he would probably be disappointed if that alone worked, that he probably wanted you to make it more difficult, and was likely enjoying the challenge. Perhaps you should have put a bit more thought into the plan, but it was too late now.
Your body stiffened as his hands met your bare skin — one reaching up your shirt, the other maneuvering underneath the waistband around your hips, groping at the sensitive flesh beneath. Your jaw clenched, and your hands balled into fists, the discomfort no doubt evident on your face, but you maintained your silence.
“Oh, wow. You're pretty dedicated to this, huh.”
You hated the fact that he sounded amused, more or less a confirmation that he was in fact enjoying this. Dammit.
You bit your lip, trying to focus on looking around the room — not that there was anything to really look at — and not the sensation, nor your increasing desire to give it up for the sake of strangling him. He continued the discomforting motions for another few moments, but soon gave up, slouching forward against you and returning to holding you still in his arms.
…And then, nothing. At least, for a moment. Only his arms wrapped around you, and the quiet, only dispelled by the low sounds of the ocean outside.
And then—
You squealed, lurching forward as a sharp pain shot through your shoulder. Your back arched and you jolted as you tried to squirm, only held back from doing so by the iron grip holding you in place.
You tried to turn your torso around, struggling against the grip, sputtering in near disbelief as you attempted to speak, voice quickly going shrill.
“You—you just— did you just bite me?!”
Rather than give any response, he merely pulled you to lean to your other side, bringing his mouth up to your opposite jugular, taking a dramatically deep breath, no doubt just to elicit a reaction.
And admittedly, it worked. “No no no, don’t you dare—eek!”
You squealed again as his teeth sank into your flesh once more, keeping a firm biting grip for just a second before releasing you again.
You began to squirm, trying to pull yourself away. “That— the hell? I was already talking to you, you little…!”
“Mhm. I know.” He pulled you back effortlessly despite your efforts to pull away, resting his head on your shoulder, nuzzling the side of his face to yours. “I just wanted you to make that noise again.”
A low, grumbling noise of irritation came out of your throat. You finally went limp, resigning yourself to your defeat.
“Fine!” You sighed. “What is it?”
He paused.
“…Eh?”
You could hear the confusion in his voice. You sighed.
“You were trying to get my attention, remember? What were you going to tell me?”
“Oh. Uh…”
There was another pause. A few seconds of quiet passed before he finished—
“I actually don’t remember now.”
You closed your eyes and let your head fall forward, saying a small prayer to the gods that this ship sank and took you with it.
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Xiao
“I'm going to get food for you. Do you have anything particular you want?”
With those words breaking the silence, you now had your chance to carry out the intended act of spite you’d spent the last hour planning in your head. It had been quiet for some time, making it a bit difficult to exercise said plan. Your captor was perfectly content with silence itself, which meant that this was, perhaps, not the best tactical approach, but you didn’t exactly have many tools of conflict at your disposal, so this expression of resentment would have to do.
Clenching your jaw, you exhaled in a frustrated huff, turning onto your side to face away from him. After a few moments of pause, he spoke again, seeming to not understand your lack of response.
“…I was asking you a question. I need to know what to bring back.”
Still, you didn’t reply.
You heard him shuffle over to you, feet brushing against the cold stone floor, before you felt his hand grasp your shoulder through the blanket, giving you a light shake.
“What do you want? You need to tell me.”
“…”
A few more seconds of silence passed. You couldn’t see his face, but you could feel the staring on your back as he seemed to slowly piece together the significance of your current behavior.
“…You are doing this on purpose.”
He gave his conclusion as if it needed to be said aloud, apparently less immediately obvious to him than it was to you. After a few more seconds, in a similar tone, he drew another conclusion.
“You’re upset.”
If not for your current effort of silence, you would have made some snarky comment about his brilliant deduction skills.
But you said nothing. Your eyebrows furrowed. Part of you did want to lash out, to express your irritation verbally, but you forced yourself to stay silent. More seconds of silence passed by.
Taking your lack of reply itself as confirmation, his next words took on a tone of increasing frustration.
“This is pointless. What do you accomplish by ignoring me?”
“…”
“You will die without food.”
“…”
“…”
“…”
“…Stop that.”
“…”
A minute of silence passed. The adeptus was seemingly uncertain of how to proceed, perhaps confused to your whole purpose with the effort of silence.
And then, you jolted at a sudden sharp pain as the cartilage of your ear was grasped and subsequently twisted.
“Ow ow ow!!” You bolted upright, jerking your head out of his grasp, clasping a hand over the now-sore ear as the momentary pain began to ebb away.
You glared, narrowing your eyes. “Was that necessary?”
He folded his arms, an equal look of displeasure on his features, and with a deadpan voice, replied—
“Yes.”
You waited for anything further he had to say, but it seemed that was all he had to say. You sighed, slouching over.
“…I dunno. Just get me whatever’s easiest for them to make.”
He folded his arms.
“Why didn't you just say that then?”
You merely shrugged, not having the energy nor the desire to explain any concepts of human social phenomena — a process that was always frustrating and time-consuming — on this day in particular.
After a few moments of pause as he looked to the ground, he looked up at you again, eyebrows furrowing.
“…Don't do that again.”
You nodded, exasperated, and closed your eyes. “Yeah, yeah. I won't.”
You opened your eyes, turning your head to look at him, only to be met with an empty room, only the faintest trace of color, like a flickering light before it faded.
And thus, you sighed, laying back down in bed, resolving to try and conjure up a new tactic.
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Albedo
“Hey, do you mind turning that light off?”
It was the first time he had spoken to you since your earlier fight. Well, perhaps ‘fight’ was not the best descriptor — it was more like you getting upset over something trivial and whining, only to get increasingly upset when he gave only his typical dry, snarky replies, ultimately ending with you turning your back to him — but nonetheless. It seemed he thought that enough time had passed that you would be over your petty anger.
He would find that assumption to be incorrect, and as childish as it was, you felt some satisfaction by remaining silent from where you sat upright in bed. You rested your head against your hand, turning your gaze out the window.
“Hey, ___,” he said your name again, trying to gain your attention. “The light, next to you.”
Still, you didn’t reply, this time closing your eyes as if to block him out, this time turning your body away from him and towards the window instead.
“…Ah. I see.”
You waited for him to continue, to press you about why you were upset so you could resume your earlier ranting.
But then, there was only silence.
You waited another moment. And another. And another.
But he didn't say anything further.
After a minute or so had passed, you slowly turned your head, confused by the lack of the reaction you had desired.
Seeing you turn in his peripheral vision, his motions of whatever he was working with paused as he turned his gaze towards you, tilting his head. “Mm?”
The bastard had the audacity to smirk at you. You glared, jerking back to turn away from him again.
…And more time passed. You waited. Minutes turned into an hour. And then another. You picked up a provided book to read after the boredom became unbearable, deciding that as long as you still gave him a cold shoulder, he'd still get the message.
…And even more time passed. A third hour. The sun fell and set and it grew dark, moonlight — and the light you'd still neglected to turn off — illuminating the room.
And then, finally, around three and a half hours after your initial interaction, after you were already lying down for the night, you heard the distinct sound you'd come to recognize as him putting the various tools away into a drawer. Then footsteps that pattered around the room, putting a few other things back into their proper places, the rustling of clothes being removed, and finally, the footsteps came close.
The mattress shifted and creaked as he climbed into bed next to you — finally turning off the lamp as he'd requested. He leaned over you, turning the blinds shut, and then, laid down in bed.
…And then there was only quiet.
The irritation swelling in your chest finally boiled over. You bolted upright.
“…Ugh! You— you…!”
“Oh, and here I was worried you were developing a throat cold.”
The dry-humored reply only served to infuriate you further.
“Why didn't you say anything?”
He didn't bother sitting upright himself. You could make out his form, but perhaps it was a good thing you couldn't see his face, as it was certain either a smug or unbothered expression that would only anger you further.
“My patience exceeds yours. It was just a matter of waiting.”
Your fists clenched so hard your hands trembled. You opened your mouth, but before you could give a spiteful reply, the sheets shifted as he sat up alongside you. His arm reached out, wrapping around your waist, and firmly pulled you back down to lie side-by-side.
He took a deep breath in, a heavy sigh out. “I'm pretty tired now, though. I understand you have some complaint to make, but I’d prefer you save it until tomorrow. Is that alright?”
Your eye twitched. You crossed your arms, turning your back to him.
“Jerk.”
“Mhm.” His arm reached over and pulled you close, your back pressed to his chest. “Goodnight.”
You huffed, pouting, but nonetheless—
“…Goodnight.”
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Heizou
“Hey, so, I noticed there’s no food made or anything… it’s fine if you’re tired,” he raised his voice just enough as was appropriate for speaking to someone from the next room over. “I can go pick something up.”
The ever-upbeat tone to his voice only irked you further. Normally, you would have had food made yourself by the time he’d been home — now he’d been back for half an hour, and had finally walked into the kitchen to grab something, seeming to notice your act of protest. You’d been hoping he would immediately suspect something was wrong, but of course, he was too optimistic for that.
“But, if I’m going to do that, I need to go now,” he continued, as he made his way back into the living room, “before all the stalls close for the day.” He came to stand directly in front of where you sat on the couch, huddled with your blankets.
You said nothing, keeping your gaze turned to the floor. He tilted his head at your silence.
“…That good with you, or…?”
Several more seconds passed. You huffed, turning to the side.
Thus, it finally seemed to click with him.
“Oh dear. Cold shoulder.” Much to your irritation, though, he only sounded amused, not genuinely upset. “What might that be for?”
You gritted your teeth, pulling the blanket over your head, just leaving enough space for you to see. You could still see him from your side as he sauntered over a few steps, leaning over against the wall as he continued.
“I’m being serious, you know. I don’t know why you’re upset… although I suppose forcing me to figure it out is the intent, of course.”
Every word that came out of his mouth only made you angrier. The audacity to sound so smug, a playful sort of dramatism he always seemed to carry in his voice. It irritated you to no end, especially in moments like these.
And to make matters worse, you could see him smile in your peripheral vision.
“I know you probably intended this to make me upset or something, buuuut, you’re really just giving me a challenge to figure out.” You didn’t miss the cocky expression on his face. “And that’s kind of my thing, you know?”
…You supposed he was right about that. Dammit. You probably should have thought about that before deciding to go through with this… but it was too late now. You merely shifted around, pulling your knees up to your chest, hoping your frustration showed on your face.
“Will you talk to me if I get it right?” He only waited for a single second before seeming to realize the futility of the question. “Ah, well, I guess asking that is pointless. Hmm…” He put his hand up to his chin in a pensive pose, speaking aloud as much to himself as to you. “If you just wanted me to get you something, simply telling me would be the more logical course of action.”
Your mouth pulled into a taut line with your irritation. You waited, listening as he continued his deductions.
“You don’t have any complaints that have gone ignored or anything… and even then, you’d probably just remind me if there was something I’d forgotten to fix.” He stood back upright, beginning to pace around on the floor. “Besides, this sort of behavior generally indicates that the other party has committed a specific transgression. If you just wanted something, this would be an impractical way of going about your goal.” He nodded, as if confirming the thought to himself. “The whole silent treatment thing is generally just a means of communicating displeasure, so that the offending party is forced to acknowledge their transgression.”
You pulled the blanket fully over your head, flopping down onto your side in exasperation and frustration, listening to him go on. At this point, his analysis was starting to feel humiliating, the description of it more or less a reminder of just how petty and childish it was. You felt a burning sense of embarrassment in your chest as you curled up into a ball, hugging your knees.
“There are two major factors to narrow it down — an active or passive transgression,” he continued, “and if the former, was it something I said, or something I did? Hm…”
You heard his footsteps make their way around the room as he spoke.
“You were talking with me normally this morning, and I didn’t notice any hostility then, so it would have to be something occurring just within the half hour or so since I came home, or—”
And then, he stopped mid-sentence.
“Ah.”
The tone of voice of that single syllable was immediately recognizable as realization. You felt a surge of bitterness come up in your chest again, and although it was embarrassing, you were still determined to get your point across.
“You forgot,” you finally muttered. Your voice came out incredibly whiny and petulant, but at this point, you just dealt with the nagging sense of shame.
“I know, I know. I said we’d go take a walk and get some food when I got back, right?” You heard his footsteps draw closer, coming over to you, and the couch cushions shifted with his weight as he sat down. “Hey, I’m sorry, okay? It was just a busy day, is all.” He reached over and rested his hand on your head through the layer of blanket. “I’m not going back on what I said, I just forgot. We can still go, we have time.”
You slowly sat up, pulling the blanket back down and uncovering your face. Your face felt hot, you looked down to the ground, unable to bring yourself to look him in the eye.
“…Sorry,” you murmured. Now that it was over, you felt horribly embarrassed by the whole stunt you’d pulled. You buried your face in your hands.
“Aw, don’t be upset. It’s fine.” He stood up, smiling, extending his hand out for you to take. “Come on, the lines will get long in just a few minutes.”
Now, you were actually quite grateful for his cheeriness. Still flustered, but humbled, you grasped his hand, letting him help pull you up. “Okay.”
“Mm.” He took a few steps over to the door, turning the knob, before coming to a halt. You saw the expression on his face waver, the smile twitch. He opened his mouth as if to say something, but stopped short, closing his mouth again and taking a deep breath—
“I won’t talk to anyone.”
You gave him the assurance before he could ask, your voice quiet, as if by speaking softly, the matter itself could be more easily swept away once you were done addressing it.
He let go of the breath he’d taken, exhaling as his shoulders relaxed. For just a second, there was some discomfort in his expression, but it was gone within a moment, replaced with another playful smile.
“Ah, thanks.”
And thus, he turned the handle, pulling you out into the fresh air, and the many faces of strangers you’d learned to pretend didn’t exist.
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Cyno
“I'm going to head out in just a minute. You can come with me, if you promise to behave well.”
You grinded your teeth. The choice of words was irritating enough, but you were primarily angered by the mere notion that being able to go outside — such a simple, basic right — was somehow an earned privilege.
No matter. You were already determined to ignore him anyway. You chose not to respond, returning to the book in your lap as you sat on the bed, refusing to turn to face him where he stood a short length away.
Sure enough, after a moment, you heard his footsteps on the stone floor, gradually coming around to your side, leaning over to try and look at your face.
“…Did you hear me? I was saying—”
You huffed, turning yourself away from him.
There was a pause.
“Oh.”
It didn't sound particularly bothered, only mildly surprised — perhaps that itself irritated you even more.
You saw him tilt his head out of the corner of you eye, white strands of hair brushing against his shoulder. “Isn’t this rather pointless? Communicating your emotions would be faster and easier if you just verbalize it.” After a pause, he added, “You can't keep this up forever.”
He crossed his arms, waiting for a response, but after several moments, received none.
He sighed. “Well, suit yourself, I suppose.”
You were not expecting, however, what came next — the book you were focused on was suddenly torn from your hands. You almost verbalized the ‘hey!’ that ran through your mind, only catching yourself just in time to stifle any noise, but the irritation and surprise surely still showed on your face as you looked up at him in bewilderment.
“What?” He tilted his head. “The obvious course of action here is to do things to upset you into speaking. You have to give it up at some point.” He shrugged. “I might as well expedite that process.”
You inhaled, automatically preparing to retort, but snapped your jaw shut as you caught yourself before you spoke once again. Your hands curled into fists.
He held the book under one arm, quickly reaching over and grabbing the two others sitting on the table beside the bed. “Alright… hm.” He turned his head, scanning the room. “I'll take all your reading material, and leave you alone with nothing to do while I'm gone. That's… maybe eight hours. You’ll have a good deal of time to reflect on your choice, at least.”
Your mouth pulled taut in an expression of displeasure. You didn't like the thought of such boredom.
He made his way over to the nearby desk, scooping up the remaining books into his arms before turning towards the hallway door. He turned his head back towards you.
“Unless you change your mind.”
He then began taking steps towards the door — slowly, deliberately so. It was infuriating that he responded with such calmness, and far more so that he was so easily able to completely overturn your attempt with barely any effort, without even being affected by it at all, and above all, most infuriating that he knew you'd give the exact response he anticipated.
And you did.
“Wait, wait—”
He came to a halt, but didn’t bother turning his head back to look at you. “Yes?”
Your hands balled up into fists, you were so irked by his words and demeanor, but nonetheless, you told yourself, you had no choice. You weren’t about to endure the alternative.
“…Fine…” You stood up, looking to the ground in embarrassment and frustration as you stomped over to where he stood. “I’ll go.”
He gave you a nod. “There, see, that was a much easier way of going about this.” He then took a few steps back towards the desk, depositing the books that had been used as leverage in your bartering as he added, “don’t you think?”
You rolled your eyes, displeasure scrawled on your face. “…I guess.”
You stepped out of the room before he did, waiting for him to exit before following behind him, since you didn’t know exactly where you were going. For a few moments, you merely walked in silence. You didn’t know if he intended to address the matter again — hell, you never knew what he was thinking — but after a minute or so of silence, you got your answer.
“You know, if I were as spiteful as you were being, I might have rescinded the offer entirely,” he said, voice ever so blunt and monotonous. “And forced you to stay in there with nothing to do.”
You grinded your teeth, narrowing your eyes as you looked over at him.
“…Are you trying to get me to thank you?”
He didn’t miss a beat in his reply.
“It would be appreciated.”
You crossed your arms, puffing your cheeks out in a petulant pout, which seemed to get your refusal across well enough. He shrugged.
“Well, it was worth a try.”
Another minute passed. You took a turn down a dark hall, which seemed to prompt another thought to his mind.
“And in the future, you should probably be aware that such a strategy is rather weak. It’s very easy to turn around on the one using it, as you just observed.”
You huffed in irritation. “Yeah, yeah.”
“It’s actually very similar to a common flawed strategy used by beginner card players. You see…”
You sighed in exasperation, pressing your palm to your face as you prepared to tune out the following hour.
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Kaveh
After the second time calling your name with no response, you finally heard him get up, walking over to where you lay in bed. You clenched your teeth, irritation exuding off your form in waves, so you hoped, at least.
As soon as he got closer, you huffed, closing your eyes, waiting for him to speak, and he did.
“Hey…”
Which you used as your cue to turn over, rolling onto your other side so that your back faced him.
There was a few seconds of pause before he pieced your actions together.
“…Are you mad at me?”
His voice was soft and pitiful-sounding, so much so you couldn't help but feel a twinge of guilt.
That momentary guilt was, however, almost immediately replaced with another surge of irritation. No. You knew exactly was he was doing, it was intentional, and you weren't going to fall for it.
He walked around to the foot of the bed, leaning over to look you in the eye.
“Hey—”
But you averted your gaze, pulling the blankets up over your face, turning over onto your stomach.
There was a moment of pause. His tone shifted.
“…Hmph. Fine.”
With that, he turned on his heel, stomping back to the desk at the other side of the room, and sat down, huffing as he resumed his work. You could hear the bitter irritation in his pencil scribbling, much heavier-handed and harsher than moments prior.
You waited for him to say something more, thinking his resolve to walk away from being ignored wouldn’t last long, but to your surprise, after some time passed, he still managed to stay quiet.
And more time passed, and then some more. You’d initially begun ignoring him around ten-thirty or so, and now, you confirmed as you peeked out from under the blankets — having almost fallen asleep — it was well past midnight.
Finally, your attention turned back to him as you heard him put the pencil down. He stood up (you did not miss the harshness with which the chair was pushed back), walked (with heavy footsteps) over to the floor lamp at the side of the room, and turned it off, leaving only the moonlight to cast light through the room.
But rather than coming over to bed, he only made his way back to the desk, dramatically slumping back down into the chair, putting his forearms on the desk before slouching forward and burying his face against them.
And then, there was only silence. You waited, but nothing happened.
It wasn't exactly difficult to figure out the intention. On one hand, your immediate thought was that it was petulant, but then again, you felt a twinge of guilt realizing you were more or less the instigator here (even if it was only in reaction to him annoying you earlier), and that your course of action wasn't exactly mature either.
Well, you supposed the right thing to do now would be to at least try and reconcile. You sighed.
“Kaveh.”
That time, you were the one who only got silence as a response. Turning your own act against you, you guessed.
You closed your eyes, took a deep breath, and, having been a bit hesitant the first time, fully committed to resolving the situation. You tried again.
“…Kaveh.”
….
After a few more moments, your voice took on a tone of frustration, which you tried to suppress for the sake of your goal of conflict resolution.
“Kaveh. I know you can hear me. Come on.”
He didn't lift his head, so his response — thankfully giving one, at least — was not only in a bitter, pitiful-sounding voice, but also muffled by fabric.
“What.”
You sighed. “Look, I… I'm sorry, just… come to bed, okay? Let's just forget this.”
Ugh. Although you still figured it was the right thing to do, you realized with disappointment that you were giving in yet again, as you tended to be the one to do. You resolved to be a little stronger-willed next time… then again, you always did that too.
“…No.” Even in the dark, you could see him — albeit only in the form of a vaguely red-white-blonde lump — shift around as he spoke, bitterness in his voice. “You obviously don't want me over there. I'll sleep here.”
You reached up to pinch the bridge of your nose in exasperation as the defeat settled in. “No, I… I do. Please?”
Once more, you only got silence, even after waiting for half a minute or so. Finally, you took a deep breath, in and out, and — after a moment of hesitation to ask yourself if you were really going to do this, to which you determined it was for the best, regardless of what it did to your pride — swung your legs over the side of the bed, feet brushing against the cold floor.
Your footsteps shuffled against the hardwood with each of the very few steps it took to get from the bed to the desk. You could see him fidget as you approached.
In what you hoped would be perceived as affectionate, you bent your knees just enough to be at the same level as where he sat, an awkward positioning, but just enough to reach out and wrap your arms around him in an embrace.
“Come on. I’m sorry, okay?”
There was a few moments of quiet, and for a second, you thought maybe you would have no success, maybe he really was that upset. But then, he lifted his head, still speaking in a blatantly upset tone of voice.
“…Only if you tell me why you were doing that in the first place,” he muttered.
You sighed. “I dunno… I was just upset about everything from yesterday, and… look, it doesn’t matter.” You smiled, although you weren’t sure if he could see it. “Let’s just go to sleep… come on, please?”
There was a moment of pause, but finally, he stood up, huffing in residual stubbornness as he walked over to bed, falling flat on his back. “…Fine.”
You were too tired to be annoyed at that point, instead walking over, taking your place next to him. You decided to try and take the high road, so to speak. “…Sorry for ignoring you.”
You reached out and put your hand on his head. He turned, pulling you close, burying his face against your chest.
“…No, I’m sorry,” he mumbled, muffled by your clothing and flesh. “You’re right… let’s just forget it.”
You hummed in agreement. You were going to leave it at that, but after a moment, you felt him shift. He propped himself up on his elbow to speak.
“Hey, wait, what time is it? I was gonna show you the thing I was working on when you wouldn’t talk to me… I can still—”
“It’s one in the morning. PLEASE go to sleep.”
You both stiffened as the muffled voice came through the wall. Several awkward seconds passed.
Ah… you forgot how little privacy this place gave you. You raised your voice just enough to ensure you were heard.
“Sorry, Alhaitham…”
You heard him sigh and turn over on his side of the wall.
“Yeah, yeah.”
More silence as the seconds ticked by.
“I’ll, uh, show you tomorrow.”
“…Yeah.”
And with that, he finally laid back down to sleep.
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Kazuha
“Ah, look at how bright it is. I didn't realize it would be a full moon tonight.”
He had a soft, blissful expression. He was one of those people that always seemed to find a great deal of joy in simple pleasures of life… depending on the circumstances, it could be either endearing or annoying.
At the moment, it was very much the latter. If you weren't so mad, you'd feel bad about what you were about to do.
It would certainly work, seeing as he was talkative by nature, always making little comments as you went about your day. You'd already tried to make your displeasure very clear — ever since you'd begun setting up camp for the night (in the middle of nowhere, where you now spent the majority of your time), you'd given him curt, cold, one-word replies, and the irritation was certainly audible in your voice.
He turned his head towards where you sat cross-legged on the ground, a wide smile on his face. “We should go for a walk, since it's so bright.”
The very last thing you wanted to do was more walking after having spent the entire day doing just that. You clenched your jaw, slouching over and resting your head against your hand.
A few seconds of quiet passed. After realizing you weren't responding, he leaned over to better look at your face, eyebrows raised.
“Hey, is something wrong?”
You huffed a heavy breath, jerking your head away from him.
“…Oh.” You could see him smile in your peripheral vision, albeit now an awkward, uncomfortable sort of smile. “You’re, ah, still upset about earlier, I take it?”
You didn't respond, maintaining your silence.
“…I'll take that as a yes… haha…”
The laugh was as forced and awkward as his expression. He stood silently for a moment, as if hoping it would be a very short effort and that you'd break your silence, but you did not.
“...It seems you really know how to find my weaknesses.” He gave you an awkward, sheepish smile, rubbing the back of his head. “This is bothering me more than I would have thought it would… but that's your intention, I imagine.”
You didn't really have any particular direction to take this effort — you didn't have anything you wanted to accomplish with it or anything, it just seemed the only way you could think of to express your frustration. Now, you weren't certain what to do — your only real course of action, you supposed, was to keep it up. You kept your silence. He moved to sit beside you, just a short distance away.
Silence followed, only disrupted by the crackling of the small fire beside you and the wind weaving between the tall grass. He kept up the same cheerful-but-mellow voice as always, the one that so very much got on your nerves whenever you tried your best to exude negativity, which he always seemed to shrug off effortlessly, perpetually unbothered.
Yes, your snide, sometimes even mean comments, your cold tone, your disgusted expressions, those never seemed to bother him at all. He just laughed and smiled and carried on as he always did.
With this, on the other hand, it seemed you’d finally found a weak point. You resisted the urge to grin, quite pleased with having found a greater success than you’d even expected.
Meanwhile, his own smile continued to falter, twitching right alongside his arms.
“If there's anything I can do that will make you… not do this, I'll gladly do it. You just… you know, have to tell me.”
You saw his fingers curl, straining the fabric as they dug into his thighs with such force and strain that they began to tremble.
But for a few minutes, he did nothing. Perhaps he was just waiting, giving you time to see if you'd change you mind, or maybe he just couldn't decide how to proceed. You kept your gaze focused on the scenery, the blades of grass as they waved back and forth in the breeze, the reflection of the moon wavering in the pond off in the distance. As irritated as you were, the landscape was admittedly quite serene.
You were brought out of your focus by the rustling sound as he stood. You remained still, but your heart began to accelerate as he took a few steps towards you, his ever light-footed way of walking barely making a sound, maneuvering behind you before slowly sitting down.
He shuffled forward, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you back. Once your shoulder blades touched his chest, he tilted his head forward, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck.
You fought the urge to squirm. You didn't like the quiet. Something about it, in that moment, was ominous, suffocating, as if some innate instinct was telling you something was wrong.
When he finally lifted his head, he spoke directly into your ear, breath warm against the flesh.
“I don't want to hurt you.”
The sudden quiet, low voice sent a chill down your spine. You found yourself going stiff, eyes widening.
His grip tightened, squeezing your waist firmly enough that it began to hurt.
“…I don't like doing that… it makes me feel really weird, you know…?”
It grew tighter. His fingers began to dig into your sides, ten small points pressing with painful force. You stiffened, body reflexively arching forward to get away from the pain, but they only dug in harder, pulling you back.
“But,” he continued, voice low and quiet, so soft yet somehow so chilling, “I really don't like you doing this.”
Your heart felt as if it were pounding out of your chest. Your breathing grew quicker.
He tilted his head downward, resting his forehead against the back of your neck. The final words came out wavering, almost a whisper.
“So… you’ll stop this, won’t you?”
You swallowed. Your response came out instinctively, the dread you felt having easily defeated your stubbornness.
“O-okay,” you stuttered as you spoke, “I'm sorry, I didn't… I didn't mean to make you…”
The pain came to an abrupt stop, his entire body relaxed with a heavy sigh of relief.
“Ah, haha,” this time, he squeezed you in his arms only enough to convey affection. “I was worried for a moment there.” His voice immediately shifted back to its usual timbre, soft and soothing. “I’m glad you weren’t too upset.”
You shook your head, eyes still wide with fear, needless to say struggling with the psychological whiplash of the rapid shift in the atmosphere.
If he noticed your stiffness, he didn’t say anything, instead opting to affectionately rest his head on your shoulder, leaning his face against yours. “Well, it’s probably too late to walk anyway… and you’re probably tired, too. Hm…” he paused for a moment, then lifted his head, tilting it up to the sky. “We can appreciate the beauty of the night while being sedentary, though. Say, are you familiar with the constellations?”
You struggled to give a verbal answer. “A-ah, well, I…” You swallowed.
“Ah, that’s alright. I know them very well. Right now, hmm… see that one directly above us?”
He started to point up, you let your gaze follow his direction as he began to ramble on about this and that star. Most of the time, you found that soft-spoken but avid enthusiasm rather endearing — although in that moment, you found it a bit difficult to appreciate.
“And a little to the right, those four that form a bit of a square shape, that’s—hey, are you cold?”
“Mm?” You gave your best attempt to smile, knowing he could at least see the side of your face. “I, uh, I guess… why…?”
“You’re just shivering pretty badly,” he replied. “You should have said something. Here…”
He leaned backwards, grabbing the blanket atop your shared makeshift sleeping bag, pulling it over and wrapping it around the both of you, covering you from the night wind that, in reality, barely even did anything to alleviate the sweltering summer heat.
“That better?”
You nodded. “…Yeah.”
“Mm, good. Let me know if you need anything else, okay?”
Once you nodded, he wrapped his arms around you again, pointing back up at the sky and resuming his lesson.
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Xingqiu
“There’s a yearly festival going on tonight.”
You were already irritated, but the cheerfulness in Xingqiu’s voice when he came bounding into the room certainly did not help.
He quickly made his way over to where you sat, leaning over to the side to better look at your face.
“It’s one of the most exciting ones the harbor holds, in my opinion. We should go!”
Silence. You said nothing in reply, only curling your fingers into fists, clenching your jaw and looking down at the floor.
A few seconds passed as he processed your response, or rather, lack thereof. Given the dispute that had taken place a few hours ago, you were certain it wasn’t difficult for him to figure out.
“Ah… aha… surely you’re not still upset about earlier, are you?” He tilted his head, the smile on his face unwavering. “Come on, this will be fun. It’s only for a few days, so we should really make the most of it.”
More silence. Even though you didn’t speak, you didn’t try to hide the spite and irritation on your face.
He then crouched down to get face-to-face with you. His smile was still there, but his eyebrows shifted to an expression of displeasure, the top and bottom halves of his face seemingly misaligned.
“You’re not going to let some silly little disagreement ruin your whole day, are you?” He reached out, patting the top of your head. “Come on, now, you’re more mature than that.”
You almost snapped at him, but you held your tongue. You had become increasingly aware of the subtle ways he seemed to manipulate your thoughts and feelings, slipping in little choices of words to have very specific effects, like with the last thing he’d just said. It irritated you to no end — much more so how often it worked, only for you to realize it later on.
But not today. You were going to be firm, resolute, not let him influence you, so you told yourself. You huffed a heavy breath, crossing your arms and jerking your head out from under his hand.
Out of the corner of your eye, you saw his expression shift — his eyes narrowed, his smile fell, and you heard the soft -tch of disapproval as he stood upright — only for his face to shift back to a pleasant expression as quickly as it had fallen to an unpleasant one, a degree of composure worthy of being called a honed and trained skill.
He sighed, overdramatically so, holding his hands out palm-up at each side and shaking his head. “And here I was trying to do something to make you happy. Oh well.”
He turned on his heel away from you, facing the door.
“How unfortunate. I suppose I'll just have to go by myself.”
He began to walk towards the exit, each step deliberately slow, an unmistakable smugness to his eloquent, dramatic way of speech.
“Of course, I'm sure my father will ask where you are...” he sighed again, shrugging his shoulders. “I'll just have to tell him that the spouse he found for me is so very disagreeable.”
You clenched your teeth. You could feel it coming, knew exactly what the next words out of his mouth would be. You nearly trembled with how hard your muscles tensed.
He paused his steps right at the edge of the door, and without bothering to look over at you, in a voice just so perfectly quiet, he added—
“I'm sure that will have a positive effect on your family’s standing with mine.”
You clenched your jaw. There it was. The one card he always held, an instant defeat.
“Wait…”
The word came out of your mouth on impulse. You winced at your own failure, but it wasn’t as if you had much of a choice.
Then he decided to turn around.
“Oh?” He tilted his head, cheerfulness returned to his voice and expression. “You’ve changed your mind?”
You shuffled over to where he stood, keeping your gaze to the ground. “…Yes. I’ll go.”
“…”
There was a pause. His eyes were half-lidded, the look on his face and the heavy tension in the air making it obvious what was expected of you.
But again, choice was not a luxury you had. You swallowed your pride.
“…Sorry for… being like that.”
He waved his hand dismissively. “Oh, that? It’s no big deal, really. I’m not upset at all.” Then, he extended the same hand out to you. “You’re ready, then?” He smiled, this time seemingly back to a genuine cheer. “I already have a route planned out to get us to all the best spots in one night.”
You nodded, taking his hand in yours.
“Sounds great.”
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chahnniesroom · 4 months
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in sickness and in health
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pairing: kim seungmin x female reader
summary: you're the most important thing in seungmin's life, of course his biggest fear would be losing you. it means that taking care of you when you're not feeling well comes naturally.
word count: 2.1k
warnings: a little bit of angst, sickness (fever, feeling nauseous, etc.)
a/n: partially inspired by me being ill at work and my amazing coworkers taking care of me and making sure i didn't faint lol.
till death do us part collection | read it on ao3 | masterlist
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Seungmin loves being an idol. 
He loves to sing and performing in front of Stays always thrills him. He loves the other members and really, everyone else that he gets a chance to work with. At times it can be stressful, but for the most part, it’s fairly easy to manage the downsides of being famous.
But when he started dating you, he found out that there are parts of being an idol that he hates.
He always thought that he'd be different from a lot of idols and wouldn't be afraid to show his partner off. The second he met you though, he knew he'd do anything and everything in his power to keep you safe. You understand, of course, and do your part to make sure that only your closest friends and family are aware of who you're dating.
It pains Seungmin to do this, but he knows nothing good can come out of your identity being known.
The two of you are more than careful, sometimes Seungmin feels silly with how cautious he is about meeting up with you. Yet somehow his heart always feels like it will beat out of his chest whenever he sees articles that speculate about idol relationships.
You do your best to stop him from stressing, but it’s something that Seungmin can't quite shake. You're the most important thing in his life, of course his biggest fear would be losing you.
The first time his phone rings during a livestream with the whole group, Seungmin brushes it off. The caller ID says it's an unknown number and everyone he knows has been receiving a lot of spam calls and texts lately. 
He swipes away the notification and tries to focus on just reading comments when the same number calls back, a couple minutes later. He ignores it again, but on the third call, he nudges Chan’s knee beside him and subtly tilts his phone screen so that Chan can see. His phone is on silent so nobody watching the live should be able to tell that he's getting the calls, but the timing feels too coincidental for him not to be suspicious. 
"They keep calling," he says under his breath. 
"We'll get someone to look into the number later, just keep ignoring it," Chan advises quietly.
Seungmin takes a quick screenshot of the number, then tries to get back into the conversation to distract himself. The next time he looks down at his phone again, someone is once again calling him.
Seungmin almost reflexively rejects the call, until he realises it's your nickname flashing up on his screen.
You generally don’t call Seungmin without warning, especially not during the day when there’s a higher chance that Seungmin won’t be able to readily answer.
[sent - 3:12 pm]
sorry baby, working right now, can it wait?
His stomach drops when you just call again in response. He doesn’t want to alarm any of the members or the fans when he doesn’t know what’s going on, but he has a bad feeling about this. He once again flashes his phone to Chan briefly and leans in close.
“I want to take this, I don’t know why she’s calling, but something doesn’t seem right.”
Chan bites his lip, obviously torn for a second, before he seems to make up his mind.
“We’ve been live for almost 20 minutes, give me one second and we’ll end it so that you can talk to her, yeah?” Chan puts a hand on Seungmin’s shoulder and squeezes it tightly for a moment before clapping his hands together, effectively ending the conversation that the rest of the members were having.
Seungmin makes himself smile as they all say goodbye, but it's obvious that it's forced.
Even though the live ended as quickly as possible, Seungmin still has 2 new missed calls by the time he’s found himself an empty room to use.
"Hello?"
"Uhm hello, is this Min?" a man asks hesitantly. His voice is unfamiliar and it scares Seungmin. The only thing that brings a little bit of comfort is knowing that you’re careful to never call Seungmin by his full name when talking about him with friends or coworkers, you even have his contact information set as a nickname.
"Who is this?" he asks instead. “Where’s Y/n?”
"My name is Hyunwoo, I work with Y/n-ssi. I’m very sorry for interrupting you, but Y/n-ssi said that you were one of her emergency contacts. We tried to call with another number previously, but weren’t able to reach you."
“Sorry, I generally do not answer calls from unknown numbers. Is Y/n okay?” Seungmin swallows hard, his mouth suddenly dry. “Can I- can I please speak to her?”
“She’s just not feeling well and needs to go home. She’s resting in another room, but I can get her, one moment please.” 
There’s a bit of background noise, the sound of footsteps, murmuring, then finally, your voice.
“Minnie?” you ask, sounding groggy. “I’m sorry for bothering you, I know you were working today.”
“Hey baby, it’s okay. You don't have to worry about me. You know that you’re more important than work to me right? I’m glad you got them to call me. How are you doing?”
“I'm tired. I'm okay, just, I was feeling light-headed and have a headache so I can't work. Hyunwoo said he thinks I have a fever.”
“Okay, I’m going to pick you up and bring you home then. Just continue resting until I get there. I'll see you soon.”
Seungmin doesn’t know what he’d do without the other members. As soon as he finishes explaining the situation to them, they’re already calling a car and working out schedules so that there aren’t any problems.
Hyunwoo eyes Seungmin carefully when they first meet, likely due to the face mask and hat he's wearing. When Seungmin removes the mask and shakes Hyunwoo’s hand, he's relieved when he doesn't appear to recognise him. It's not exactly a surprise, men are generally less likely to follow k-pop groups and Seungmin hardly looks like an idol when he's barefaced and in the jeans and t-shirt that he wore for the live.
“Thank you for calling me, Hyunwoo-ssi,” Seungmin says. “Sorry I didn’t pick up at first.”
“It’s okay, Min-ssi. Y/n-ssi mentioned that your work might make you difficult to contact.” Seungmin appreciates that Hyunwoo doesn’t make any attempt to pry further.
“And thank you for taking care of Y/n.”
“It’s not a problem. Y/n-ssi is a pleasure to work with and we all want her to get better as quickly as possible. Come with me, I’ll bring you to her.”
You’re lying in a small meeting room that has all the lights off and blinds drawn. The table and chairs have all been shifted to the side to fit a yoga mat that has been laid out. You squint up at Seungmin from under a mis-match of jackets with your head resting on a pillow that matches the couches that were in the reception area of your office.
“Minnie?” Your voice is soft and a little bit confused.
“Yes, it’s me, Y/n. How’re you feeling?”
Seungmin rushes to your side, crouching on the carpet so that he can cup your cheek. Your skin is flushed and hot to the touch. You reach out a hand and he clasps it tightly with his free hand.
“Mm, I wanna go home.”
“Let’s go home then.”
The company car is still parked outside of your office building, close enough that you insist on walking yourself. Seungmin tries not to hover, but he makes sure to keep his arm looped around your waist so that you don’t stumble. The drive back to your place is fairly short, but when Seungmin glances over you’re looking unwell. Maybe it’s just the dim lighting from the backseat, but you look paler than usual and your eyes are closed.
“You feeling okay?” Seungmin asks, squeezing your hand.
“A bit nauseous,” you murmur.
“We’re almost there, just take a few deep breaths through your nose for me.”
Even though it's only a few minutes before they pull onto the street that you live on, it feels like forever. Seungmmin tries to keep you preoccupied by rubbing circles into your palm. Instead of trying to help you out of the car and into your apartment, Seungmin thanks the company driver and opts to just carry you all the way in. 
He helps to change you out of your work clothes and tucks you into your bed. You link your fingers together and protest when Seungmin attempts to leave your side.
“I promise I'll be back in a second, I just want to get some things to help you feel better, okay?” he says, pressing a kiss to your forehead. You agree, but reluctantly.
Seungmin tries to stay quiet as he rummages around your apartment, gathering some medicine, a thermometer, a glass of water, and some crackers. Next he dampens a face cloth and brings everything to your bedside table, folding up the cloth and laying it across your forehead. 
He supports you in sitting up slightly to take your temperature, brushing his fingers through your hair as you wait for enough time to pass. You lean into his touch slightly, humming in pleasure when Seungmin switches to giving you a light head massage. When the thermometer beeps, it confirms what Hyunwoo suspected, you have a low grade fever.
“You have a bit of a fever,” Seungmin tells you, keeping his voice low. “Do you feel up to having some water and medicine? It'll help you feel better, I think.”
“Okay,” you say, taking the pills that Seungmin hands you and swallowing them with a bit of water.
“Do you want to rest some more now? I want you to stay hydrated so I can make broth for you or get juice.”
“Do you have another schedule? You don't have to stay and take care of me.”
“I don't have to, I want to. And what did I say earlier? Don't worry about me. I'm not missing anything important.”
“So you are missing something,” you insist, your stubbornness making itself known. Seungmin can't help but find it endearing, especially the way that your bottom lip juts out to form a pout.
“Just vocal lessons. I already know how to sing, so it’s fine. Innie had his scheduled for tomorrow, the two of us are going to swap.”
“Oh,” you say, apparently satisfied by that.
“See, nothing to worry about. Now, what did you want? Broth or juice?”
“Broth,” you decide. “But that means you'll have to leave again. I don't want to be alone.”
Seungmin hesitates for a moment before reaching for something resting on the side of your bed.
“You won't be alone, Daengmo will keep you company, okay?”
Seungmin had gifted the stuffed dog to you the first time he had gone abroad after the two of you had started dating, even though it was only to Japan. You had insisted that he keep it at first, knowing how fond he was of the toy, but he had convinced you that it would prevent you from missing him whenever he was away.
“M'kay,” you say sleepily, wrapping your arms around Daengmo.
“You can close your eyes while I'm gone and I'll be back before you know it.”
“I'm not tired,” you say, although even in the dim lighting Seungmin can see that your eyes are starting to droop. “I'm going to stay awake until you come back.”
“Whatever you say,” Seungmin replies.
He leaves your room, closing the door behind him quietly, and heads towards the kitchen.
Seungmin prepares a couple of pots to make you soup. The first he prepares with some ingredients to make a simpler version of a ginseng chicken soup. He knows it'll take a while to cook though, so he adds water, powdered chicken broth, and ginger to the second. Within a few minutes, the clear broth is ready to serve.
Seungmin scoops a portion of it into a mug and slips an ice cube in so that you won't burn your mouth trying to drink it. He makes his way back to your room as quickly as he can, but careful to avoid the liquid sloshing over the sides.
When he eases the door open, he's greeted with the side of you with your eyes closed, clutching Daengmo tightly. Your breaths are deep and even, although you stir slightly when he sets the mug down on your nightstand.
“I'm here now," he reassures you quietly. “You just keep resting.”
“Thank you for taking care of me,” you say in a small voice.
“Of course, I’ll always be here for you.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
till death do us part collection | read it on ao3 | masterlist
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the pjo show’s cinematography is so warm and homey and clever and detail-oriented so i wanna compile a few of my favourite still shots because why not??
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^this one had me smiling so hard, not because it’s a particularly beautiful shot but the framing of the three is so well done. the focus is on sally who is talking to grover (both prominently in the front of the shot) while percy – who isn’t a part of the conversation but a listener of it – is still properly visible through the glass of the door and like??? i just think it’s a super cool way of having a passive character in the shot that i haven’t ever seen before, in a way that percy is both highlighted and still so clearly in the background that it doesn’t take away from the focus characters. also percy’s sweater matching the colours on the door is the cherry on top!!
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^next is this one. it’s so perfectly angsty and though not complete, the symmetry is still eye-catching. it encapsulates the feeling percy must experience in that moment–him, amidst destruction, knowing he’s the cause but not knowing how or why. he looks all of twelve with his haphazard hoodie and almost forlorn look. he is not gloating, he is not cheerful. though he doesn’t know the gravity of his parentage, it’s almost like the show is telling us that his powers–which cause the door to break, too btw–will always be a source of isolation for percy. he is a force of nature, a destructive one most of the time, and the fact that he is just a child who is confused will never matter because this world doesn’t care for childhood but godhood alone.
idk, this shot just evokes a very unsettling kind of sadness for me. i think it’s beautifully framed.
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^i absolutely love this one simply for the fact that the sheer struggle of the fight is so prominently visible. and yes, i cheated, this isn’t exactly a still shot but like an action sequence screenshot but whatever, it’s too good to not mention it here. the way percy is, honest to gods, bracing against the spear for his dear life, the evident and overwhelming rage on clarisse’s face, the blocking of the scene – it’s perfect. clarisse is not playing and percy is genuinely in danger and i love how this shot and the whole scene really sold us on that fact.
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^ i just think it’s extremely cool that we can see the minotaur howling in pain, percy having his mouth wide open as if he’s letting out a yell as he goes to plunge the horn and that as percy does this act–killing the minotaur–which is surefire source of safeguarding himself and grover, something that will get him to camp, we can see thalia’s tree in the background. there is no reason percy had to make the kill here, with the chaos of the fight, so the fact that this is the spot and this is the shot as he kills the minotaur makes me think it’s deliberate. having thalia in the background is so impactful because again, percy could have met a similar fate in some other alternate universe but here, he wins and he survives.
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^ do i even need to explain??? the shot is pretty and beautiful and almost magical. percy, alone with a tin of fire, burning blue food and talking to his mother. maybe one thing i can point out is that the sally-percy bond has been heavily indicated through glowing lights since the start. if you recall, the “you are not broken” speech by sally was given in front of the warm, glowing headlights of the car and percy’s face was illuminated by that warmth just the same way it is illuminated by the tin-fire in the forest.
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^ first, this is too fucking gorgeous. second, percy is wearing his red jacket again and this dream happened after he reached camp so in my opinion, this dream was initially a comfortable imagining of percy’s mind and was then hijacked by kronos but i could be wrong since i don’t clearly remember how they manifested in the books originally. nevertheless, it’s a great detail to have him wear the red jacket because even if he may not have it with him anymore, it’s still clearly something he holds dear – and might associate sally’s memories with.
also, the fact that percy seems to have alot of scenes with fire might be because as someone who can control water, fire can never truly be a source of danger for him and therefore, he can find comfort in its warmth unhindered, always?
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^ how could i not love this epic moment? the trident is perfect, big and blue and grand and majestic. half the screen is water, obviously. but what makes this good shot a great one is that there is literally no one else directly near percy except annabeth. the campers are all far away and in this shot itself only annabeth remains close to percy, though she is fittingly on the land, observing the scene before her. remember how i said percy’s legacy promises isolation but this shot tells me that despite that, percy will have someone who he can count on to be by his side (also cool that even in the bathroom, annabeth was technically still near him, even if she was, well, stalking him) and maybe this is my delusional ass talking, but annabeth being here is foreshadowing for me. i just think it’s a choice to have this epic revelation where they could easily have had percy standing alone in the middle of the lake but no, annabeth is also there and not only because she’s the one who led to that revelation but because she’s someone who isn’t intimidated by percy’s parentage and still can be beside him.
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^ i adore this shot because 1) it shows us just how young and tiny percy is and 2) it tells us that maybe that door is so fucking huge because it’s being inclusive of centaurs and other giants of their world. also, symmetry strikes again!!! the colours are so well balanced, not bright and vibrant but on the pastel side that indicates an aged feel to them.
and lastly,
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^ i just find it funny that a private academy like yancy has an official vehicle that looks as beat up and terribly malfunctioning as this. 😭 like this half van was so out of place i literally goggled at the screen when it first appeared.
okay, i’m done for now. i also really liked the faceless sally scene in the start paralleling medusa’s eventual beheading but i already made a post about it. this legitmately only covers about 10% of the shots i wanted to talk about but these might be my favourites. this was long af so if you read the whole thing, mad respect to you.
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astarioffsimpmain · 2 months
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Unsolicited Affections (Part 2)
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[Far Left & Right Screenshots + Tav by @brabblesblog & Center Screenshot by Raz]
Halsin x Plus Size F!Reader
Warnings: Body insecurity; internalized fatphobia; Halsin is a sweetheart
Synopsis: Halsin's cure for your ailments isn't exactly what you expected, but you're not exactly upset about it.
Author's Note: Thank you again to Ban and Raz for the wonderful screenshots! This one is where we dig really deep, everybody. Settle in with your comfort items and prepare for some Halsitherapy. <3 I hope you all enjoy, and get ready for some spice in Part 3!
Part 1 Here
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Your hands shook as you made your way toward Halsin's tent near the edge of camp. He had insisted on being the first line of defense from any unwelcome visitors as a way to repay you all for saving his grove from the shadow curse, and while at first you had argued, you stopped short after witnessing the earnestness in those beautiful green eyes. He wanted to do this. He wanted to protect you all. So you had relented, and had found it nearly impossible to say no to him since.
You clamped your hands together and steadied your breaths. "Gods, get it together. He's just going to check over your cuts and bruises like always." You reasoned, chastising yourself for even taking your vampiric friend's words into consideration. "I'm nothing more than a good Samaritan to him. He is being kind in response to my kindness, nothing more." You reminded yourself, doing your best to ignore the way your heart ached sharply at the admonition. You wanted to hope, but you couldn’t afford it. Wrenching your hands with one another, you stepped up to Halsin's tent and awaited his appearance. 
"There you are." His soothing voice rumbled in your ear after several disarming seconds of silence and you would have toppled over in surprise had a strong arm not wrapped firmly around your waist to steady you. The Druid pulled you against his front and you nearly lost all of the breath in your lungs to the feeling of being tucked against him. He was solid, 7 feet of muscle mass, beautifully encased by the soft ripple of tanned skin that pillowed ever so slightly to accommodate you being pressed against it. You had never been this close to him before and your mind blanked as your heart hammered painfully against your ribcage. 
"Yep, here I am." You managed to sound playfully flippant, unable to reveal your true feelings, despite how desperately you wanted to jump into his arms. "I really do think I'm alright, Halsin. Nothing more than a scrape here or a bruise there."
"Physically, you seem well for wear, but I sense something bothering you, and I'd like to help, if you'll allow me. So please, follow me. I believe I have just the remedy." He smiled down at you, at last releasing you from his hold, which sent confusing waves of both relief and disappointment coursing through you. 
"Well… alright. I'll see what you have in mind." You mused, shrugging your shoulders and missing the way his eyes glinted in the light pulsing from the plants around you. You fell into step beside him, giddy at the prospect of spending more time with him. You figured this was as close to the Druid as you would ever get, so you relished each moment you spent by his side. You tried not to think about what would happen in the future. If you didn't end up the product of a non-consented ceremorphosis, what then? Where would you go? You knew it was likely that you'd never see Halsin again; that he'd return to the Grove to resume his position as Archdruid and that you'd end up somewhere far away, working some tavern job to survive. Hollowness carved its way through your chest, more painful than any knife, and you suddenly had to take a steadying breath to keep up with your companion's long strides. 
‘Don’t think on it now,’ you chastised yourself silently, instead forcing a glance to the towering man beside you. He was relaxed, walking in a gate slow enough for you to keep up without much effort. A soft smile decorated his beautiful lips and his green eyes reflected the serenity of the darkness surrounding them. There was not much peace in the Underdark, but what little there was, you found with Halsin. Soon, the path he led you on tapered into a clearing of stone and rocks, and in the very center, a small lake. A gasp escaped your lips at the sight. It was beautiful. The water hummed with the glow of bioluminescent lichen from beneath the surface, growing in scattered mounds at the bottom of the body of water. From the surrounding rocks and the looming trees hung glowing moss, their effervescence bathing you and Halsin in a soft blue light. 
"Halsin, this is stunning." You breathed out quietly, taking in the scene before you. 
"It is, is it not? Even here in the Underdark, a form of nature prevails and finds a way to create beauty. It inspired me when I found it. I have checked the water many times over, and it is safe for submersion." He replied, looking across the lake with a sense of pride that he could only find in what was natural. Several more seconds of awe passed through you before the implications of his words connected in your mind. 
"Oh, uhm…" you sputtered, your mind beginning to reel away from the scene before you and into your own insecurities. 'Oh gods, he's talking about swimming! I can't just swim in my clothes; can I? Maybe I can. He can't see me bare! Hells, he'd never look at me again!' Your thoughts ran away with you and you stood there, unmoving and unresponsive, and Halsin took notice. 
"My heart, please be silent no longer. What is it that troubles you?" He coaxed softly, fingers trailing over your arm with a gentleness that should not be possible from a man his size. When you did not react, he reached forward with the same fingers and curved them under your chin, turning your head to face him. Your eyes met his, wide and afraid, and his other hand came up to cup your cheek, his fingers wrapping around the back of your head as he settled into the hold. 
"Oh-" was all you managed to mumble before Halsin's lips were on yours; tender, loving. 'Gods..' your mind was racing.
You practically moaned into his mouth when he abandoned your chin to wrap his arm around your back, pulling you flush against him, the hard planes of his body sending electric shockwaves through you at an alarming rate. All thoughts from moments ago had scattered and you were awash with a feeling more overwhelming than anything you could ever remember experiencing. You weren't sure how your arms had made it around the Druid's neck, or when he had hoisted you into his arms, but when you finally parted for air, your ankles were crossed behind Halsin's back and he stood ankle deep in the lake, holding you in a vice grip against him. His eyes locked with yours and the green of his irises was overshadowed by how large his pupils were blown, staring at you like he held the world in his arms. You were made breathless all over again and felt your cheeks warm. 
"I- gods… Halsin, I-" you sputtered, your words still not having returned to you quite yet. 
"I do hope I have not been careless, my heart." He said lowly, his voice betraying a hint of uncertainty. "If I have misconceived your heart, I deeply apologize."
"I- no! Halsin, I- it was incredible. It was… it was everything, I had no idea. I never thought you would feel that way about- about me." You shook your head in surprise, a breathless chuckle escaping you. "Of all people." You added, attempting to seem at least somewhat put together in front of this incredibly handsome man who had just kissed you senseless. 
A confused look passed across Halsin's features. "You speak as though you are disbelieving. You saved me. You saved my home, knowing I could do little to pay you back in return. You are incessantly kind to me, and understanding of my position, my condition-" He paused, his voice cracking with barely hidden emotion, and you reached a tentative hand to his cheek, brushing your fingertips across it gently in hopeful comfort. You let out a shaky exhale as he leaned almost desperately into your touch, his eyes having fallen closed. "You are a wonder, my heart. Nature could not possibly have made a more divine creature." 
Your heart swelled, and the thorny vines that had grown around it over time began to prick it painfully, letting it bleed into Halsin's. You sniffled as a tear escaped your eye and cascaded down your cheek, and green eyes met yours once more. It was time. He deserved to know. "I-" you took a deep breath, steadying yourself. "It seems so foolish now, in the face of everything you've said to me."
"If it troubles you this deeply, it cannot be foolish." He corrected you gently, and you nodded, another tear falling down your face. He kissed them away like it was the most natural solution in the world and you giggled; a strained, breathless thing, riddled with leftover pain, shock, and love - gods, so much love. 
You curled your fingers into his chestnut brown locks and fiddled with his braids while you sorted out the correct way to begin. Halsin waited on you patiently, stroking the undersides of your thighs with his thumbs as he continued to hold you far above the water below. "I have never been perceived as beautiful. The- uhm… well, the world has decided on an idea of what beautiful is, and I simply don't fit. I never have. No matter what I tried or how hard I tried it… I never became that ideal. I've come to accept, at this point, that I was never meant to be that. I have always and will always take up more space than most people. I will always have trouble finding clothes. I will always be more difficult to pick up and swing around. I will always be too large, in all the wrong ways." Tears were streaming from your eyes now, vehicles of the pain you carried deep in your heart running out to join the water around you. "I have always been told that someone will find beauty in me eventually, that someone will find me worthy of love, but there's a hesitancy in their eyes; a question in their gaze. 'Should I tell her this? Should I raise her hopes like this?' But even with all of their good intentions, I have only ever been ignored, or used and tossed away." 
A little sob escaped you and you clapped a hand over your mouth to quiet it, but lips pressed firmly against your knuckles and you blinked through your tears to look at the Druid. "Do not hide your pain from me, my heart. I wish to see all of you, to love all of you. I wish for you to know my heart as well as my body, and I want the same from you." Your hand returned to his shoulder and he nuzzled your nose with his own. "You should never have had to know such heartache. You shine brighter than any sun, and had they not already been blind, perhaps they would have seen that." He murmured the words you had been longing to hear all your life into your mouth like a prayer, and then he kissed you with such earnestness that you thought you would melt away and become a part of the lake beneath you. 
You cried through the kiss, your tears wetting Halsin's cheeks along with your own, but he only held you tighter, his fingers finding purchase in the dips your thighs readily made for his grip. When your lips parted, only far enough for air to play across them, Halsin murmured, his voice low, "Let us bathe together, my sweet." 
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fin
Tag List, Darlings: @thoughts-of-bear @knightofmight01 @snumlik @tifaria @listen-to-navi @greycloudsy @tiedyedghoulette @halsinsilverbough @nightlyrayne @the-library-of-the-smut @brabblesblog
(if your name isn't highlighted/underlined, I wasn't able to tag you!)
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christinarowie332 · 6 months
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i win.
part 2 of : “i’d be an idiot if i said no to that”
matt sturniolo x reader
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warnings : vv suggestive ! drugs , swearing .
—-
matt and y/n spend some quality time with his brothers . who would break first ?
(this is kinda slow so hear me out)
green text : imessage
————-
my phone lights up vibrating from underneath my pillow . i peel my eyes away from “the vampire diaries” playing from my tv and notice the time displayed on my phone. 12:36am . jesus christ .
my eyes scan my notifications as my face id opens my phone . instagram, my group chat “whores.” (56). oops . snapchat , pinterest… oh ?
matt🤭: u up ?
(AHSHHSHDWHHENEHHEHSH)
my body shoots up from where i was lay . i frantically tuck my hair behind my ears with my free hand not holding my phone . i open the message , thumbs hovering over the keyboard ready to type before i hesitate. realising i have no idea what to say .
me: yeah i’m up ! what’s up ?
i type . then delete it .
me: hiyaaaa , yeah i’m up wanna do something??? x
nope
me: yeah i’m up . whyyy wanna hang??
good enough idc
i press send with shaking fingers , allmost immediately he replies back .
matt 🤭: you know me so well , i’ll come pick u up .
me: no bother , i’ll come over . send me ur loc
matt 🤭: i’m at mine with chris and nick , we can all hang if u want?
*matt 🤭 shared his location with you*
me: oki! shall i bring anything??
matt 🤭: just yourself and whatever u need in the morning
me: i’m staying ??😏😏😏😏
matt 🤭: 😏😏😏😏
me: OMW!!!!!
matt 🤭: LMAO OK
i smile at the message and take a screenshot immediately sending it to my groupchat giggling , throwing to the middle of my bed and getting up .
after a few touch ups to my makeup i’ve left to marinate on my face a little bit too long .i change outfit into a pair of baggy light blue jeans , that fall on my hips , uggs and a tight fitted white baby tee . i throw on a hoodie that matches my uggs before realizing it’s literally boiling and ripping it off .i grab my phone and my bag , filling it with the essentials and start to exit my house .
in what feels like 30 seconds i’m pulling into what should be matt’s house . i turn my car off and look at my self in the mirror , obsessing over every little detail until deciding i look good enough .
me: i’m here !!
me: hello ??
me: matt are u home ??
after five minutes of waiting outside the door i decide to just knock it . my heart literally racing enough to hear it in my ears . after a few seconds of waiting i hear the door unlock and the handle go down .
his face drops at the sight of me and turns his head away but not taking his eyes off me , his blonde hair falling against his eyes before he swipes it away .
“MATT ??CHRIS???”
he smiles kindly and i return it . awkward .
after a few excruciatingly painful seconds i see a familiar face poke around the corner, his long and messy hair tucked into a backwards hat . it takes him a second to realize it’s me and his face lights up as he walks towards the door .
“y/n ? yo what are u doing here ? nick bro what are u doing??” he furrows his eyebrows at his brother before opening his arms towards me .
“nice to see you too chris” i roll my eyes and meet his hug .
“OH SHIT MB YOUR y/n ?!?! COME IN FUCK SORRY!!” nick rambles out grabbing me around my back and pulling me in the house .
i take the sight on his house in , the shoes shoved thrown into the corner near the stairs. it smells like autumn, a warm candle burning somewhere. i can hear music coming from what must be the room above . smiling at the familiar beat of mac miller .
“where’s matt? SORRY !!nice to meet you nick!!” i say while smiling , and turning to nick realising i haven’t even greeted the first brother
he laughs and goes to speak before we all turn around and the sight of matt speeding around the corner and skidding to a stop .
“SORRY IVE ONLY JUST SAW YOUR TEXTS” he defends himself before i can even mention it . i smile kindly and relax my shoulders at the sight of him . his hair has been cut , brunette falling onto his forehead in loose curls. the phone he had in his hand tucked in his oversized sweats .lifting his top slightly to find the pocket , showing the band of his boxers for a split second .
“you’re fine , don’t worry” i say , before letting out a breath i didn’t even know i was holding .
matt keeps the eye contact smiling slightly before turning his head towards his brothers and looking at them . “do y’all wanna smoke up?”
“allways” chris replies for both of them before leading us all to their small balcony .
——-
it’s 2 am now , we all shared a joint around their table . chris let matt play his playlist (for once apparently) and we’re now all sat talking .
i’m sat on a bench with matt shoulder to shoulder , a blanket covering us both as the temperature dropped and we were all shivering by the time the joint was smoked .
“i don’t get it nick !! women are just confusing man…..” chris whines out , he has been talking about his girlfriend mia all night and and to be honest i stopped listening ten minutes ago . “no offense y/n/n” he says now looking at me .
i peel my eyes away from matt’s hand on my knee and meet his eyes “all good man i get it…” i don’t get it . i was completely zoned into matt’s hands , and how close he was to me that i wasn’t listening to a word chris was saying .
matt notices and puts his hands under the blanket , pulling it up to his shoulders .
“u wanna go inside matt???” i ask in concern , thinking he was cold .
“no i just got a chill , i’m fine” he says looking at me now with a tight lipped smile .
i mirror his smile and look away at chris who was waiting for us to shut up so he could carry on his rambling. he starts speaking and i keep eye contact with him , now fully listening to his words.
“as i was saying …. i just don’t get it ? taylor swift is mid as fuck , i tell mia that and she literally looks at me like i just murdered a litter of puppies , SHE HATES MY MUSIC TASTE??? i literally tried-“
and just like that i am now no longer listening to chris , as i feel matt’s hand on my knee again underneath the blanket . he strokes it slightly with his thumb and runs it up my thigh , covering it with goosebumps following his touch .
my breath hitches as he takes his hand higher , to rest on my upper thigh. leaving it there and warming it with his touch.
i glance up at him in warning but all i see is him looking straight forward at chris , smirking. little shit .
he must see my face flush in the corner of his eye because he moves his hand ever so slightly higher , his index and middle finger hovering over the seam of my jeans .
my hips move forward slightly and the touch and i gulp loudly , nodding my head at nick who’s now started speaking to me .
“what music do you listen to y/n . if u say some goofy shit like the imagine dragons i may have to throw you off this balcony” he asks me while laughing at himself .
matt apparently thinks it would be absolutely hilarious to start teasing me underneath the blanket , moving his fingers up and down the seam .
“i-um” i clear my throat trying to stay collected “i like all music really …. mac miller …” matt stops moving .
i turn my head towards him to see him smiling at me and nodding for me to carry on .
“ugh let me think” i drag my words as i move my hand on his inner thigh now i feel him flinch at the touch and go to move his hand off my thigh to stop me but i flash my head towards him and raise my eyebrow in warning .
my turn .
i mirror his actions before and take my hand higher . “i like anything really ….. mac ..torylanez…” i move my hand . he shifts .
“skies ….travis….hotel ugly….” i move my hand again over his sweats . he shifts and let’s put a huff of air .
“brent faiyaz…..dominic fike”
i move my hand again and he lets out a soft allmost silent noise . a whimper , only i hear it and i smirk .
“i like anything” i look at matt now , giving him an innocent look and shrugging my shoulders.
i remove my hand as i could feel him slowly becoming harder . and place my hand on his lower thigh , griping hard . saying exactly what i needed to.
“that’s fire as fuck…what’s ur fave skies song?” i hear chris say and i turn my head towards him .
i smirk knowing i won before continuing my conversation with chris , feeling matt sink into his seat more and putting his arm around me . manspreading and putting his palm over his crotch.
i win .
——————-
i am a vile and wretched woman .
LOVE YA !!!!
@mangosrar @sturnphilia @littlebookworm803 @lividnity @def-livv @daddyslilchickenfingers @sssturniolofart @soursturniolo @deatthmatch @biimpanicking @bluesturniolo333 @urmyslxt
^^^^
i love u all 🤍🤍🤍
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strixcattus · 3 months
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I really enjoy looking at this still from Slay the Princess:
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In the midst of all the weird imagery from the first part of the Stranger route, you see for a moment—and it is cut off at the end, so I had to be quick with my screenshot—every route laid out in front of you, paired up as the game does elsewhere, and described, interestingly enough, from what I can only believe is the Voices' perspectives, or perhaps the relationship between the Princess and the Voice of a given route.
Consumption: The Beast (Hunted), the ribcages in the bottom right. Being eaten, alive or half so, is one way or another the outcome you face in the Beast. This one seems to be the least connected to its route's Voice, though I can still see it in a relational sort of way. Betrayal: The Witch (Opportunist), the nail-studded... I can't tell what it is, but it's at the top left. Betrayal on your part is the cause of the Witch's route, and it too is inevitable in some form once you're on that route—the Opportunist is very vocal about it.
Skepticism: The Prisoner (Skeptic), the chains at the bottom. Pretty clear analogue given the name of the Voice, but not to neglect—you reach the Prisoner by taking the blade (distrust of the Princess) but ultimately using it to free the Princess (you take the time to think critically about what you're being asked to do, and decide the Narrator is less trustworthy). Blind devotion: The Damsel (Smitten), the... I can only imagine locks of hair at the top. You reach the Damsel by immediately and wholly assuming she has no ill intentions, an attitude made manifest in the Smitten.
Rivalry: The Adversary (Stubborn), the spikes to the left. The Adversary route is, so long as you embrace it, about your probably-a-metaphor-for-sex-I-mean-the-Eye of the Needle-isn't-even-trying-to-veil-it eternal fight with the Adversary, with the Stubborn in strong support. Submission: The Tower (Broken), the stone columns to the right. One of the most clear-cut "this is about the Voice" examples—the Broken has completely submitted to the Tower's will, even though the player still has a few chances to resist her.
Terror: The Nightmare (Paranoid), the eyes in the upper right. Of course, the Nightmare is all about fear, and the Paranoid is the embodiment of your fear of the Princess—the fear that made you lock her in the basement and the fear that stopped your heart when she broke free. Longing: The Spectre (Cold), the wisps in the bottom left. This one is interesting, and almost made me second-guess my "Voices" reading, as the Spectre herself is clearly a creature of longing—but then what about "Submission?" The Tower is not "submitting" to anything. That's her whole deal. Perhaps this one is connected to your desire for something other than what the Narrator calls the "Good Ending..." or perhaps it has something to do with the Cold's interest in feeling something, which he expresses in a few routes (the Greys being the most obvious).
Pain: The Razor (Cheated,) the spikes at the top. She skewers you, and you die. Over and over again she skewers you, and you die, and it is painful over and over again. I'm not sure I have much to add to this one. Unfamiliarity: The Stranger (Contrarian), the abstract DNA-like strand at the bottom. You reach the Stranger by refusing to interact with the Princess, leaving her an unfamiliar blank slate whose actions you cannot predict and thus fracture into every possible image of her.
And at the heart of it all, an emotion that can only be described as—what? The Narrator doesn't get the chance to finish his sentence before you wake up in the Prisoner's basement, but I'd think the answer is obvious once you've finished the game.
After all, this is a love story.
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queenie-avenue · 4 months
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Don't run. He'll catch you anyway.
💌 ⤻ THE ACADEMIC RIVAL, SEO MIN-JUN
—> what happens when you try to escape him?
⤻ reader is gender neutral, dark themes, invasion of privacy, taking photos without consent, bullying, manipulation, slightly suggestive themes, typical yandere red flagginess (duh), min-jun is just a freak honestly, not too detailed but a small fic, besides straight up gore I think this is the darkest thing I've ever written
notes: @moyazami , i am so sorry, but i lost your ask. thank god, i took a screenshot before i deleted it. you are such a sweetheart. thank you for the ask, and keep them coming! i want to do the first imagine, but don't worry, i'll also do the second one at a later date! honestly wasn't sure to write out the part where he approaches you again but if anyone wants it, drop a ask, honestly-
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The fact that you left was laughable to Min-Jun.
At first, he was shocked that you had actually left, and the reason was clearly because of him. Second, he was sad knowing he was the reason he would not see you anymore. Third, he was angry that you had left him. Who gave you permission to leave? Certainly not him.
Fourth, he projected that anger into scheming.
Sure, you left for another school. However, did you forget? Min-Jun's entire family was rather influential, perhaps not as much as the Samsung family in Korea, but certainly able to pull a few strings here and there. His entire family was full of ministers, civil workers, and some even celebrities with the power to topple the entertainment industry. Did you really think that transferring to another school would allow you to run from his grasp?
"Are you that idiotic?" He whispered under his breath as he schemed.
You leaving the academy was like inciting war and he was going to bring out the full arsenal to pull you back into his arms.
He would hire a private detective to comb through every aspect of your life; relishing in the intimate information the detective would give him. He honestly felt a bit bad about spreading it. Not because he worried for you, but because he wanted to keep all these secrets to himself, claiming ownership of you and every thought you had in the sickest manner. Still, he supposed he could part with this knowledge. After all, when he got you back, he'd be able to learn more about you.
As said before, rumours spread like wildfire. A simple strike of a match is all he needed to turn into a massacre.
Soon, not only people from your school but from your neighbourhood began to whisper about you behind your back. They talked about your nature, some even going as far as coming up with fake rumours about you just to entertain the masses.
It was hell on earth for you. Worse than when Min-Jun tormented you.
Then, it was only one person — a boy whom you had no idea was your academic rival — but now, it was your entire community that had turned against you.
It got worse when pictures of you leaked. How had someone managed to take so many pictures of you like that?
Some immature students even stapled your embarrassing moments to the school board, leaving you to clean them up during lunchtime.
Min-Jun had some friends in that new school you went to, so of course, he heard everything that happened to you. His poor rival, you must be so hurt by all the things happening to you!
Serves you right for leaving me, Min-Jun thought as he looked at the photos of you crying when you thought nobody was looking.
Just a bit more, and he would intervene. He wanted you to feel the pain he felt when you left him. Maybe about a week more, and he would come to your rescue one of these days.
For now, he would enjoy the delicious tears that streamed down your adorable cheeks.
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velvetures · 3 months
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Times Like These
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they’re the photos that scare you more than anything. god knows where he is and the subtle -accidental- reminder that in a split second he could be ripped away from you.
no more lingering smells of his cologne and a fogged mirror after a shower. no need to buy unscented laundry detergent because he thinks people can smell it, giving away his location. no sounds of your back door opening slowly at three in the morning. or the impossibility of new scratches on your dining room table from cleaning his weapons.
you don’t hate receiving them. on the positive hemisphere of your brain, it’s the most powerful reassurance other than a phone call. seeing his blurry outline, or the slightest hint of his wrist peeking from between gloves and his jacket. that little scar there always gives him away… but you’d never say for fear of him noticing. a small admission of love, and the feeling that he cares enough to take one, or have one of the boys help out.
just to ease your mind. he knows how loud it gets when he’s halfway across the world from you. sweet little you, worrying about the soles of his boots split precariously between the stairway to heaven and edge of the pit to hell. it’s no wonder to him why you’re always wrapping him up in your arms the moment he gets home.
it’s why his shitty pictures get sent to you some way or another the moment he can risk it.
but god it’s hard looking at them. seeing him… and then scanning the background, heart aching as you search for a possible threat. as if it would even matter. but you still do it. every time. hoping that he’ll come home, so you can actually feel like the world around you is right. needing more than smeared images from shaking hands in the back of a truck. wanting hot-blooded warmth and the grit of calloused hands cradling you.
they scare you.
bullets and knives… masked faces and blood smeared gear… a phantom of pain looming at the edges of the pixels. your better knowledge of sleeplessness and adrenaline feeding his body. running in empty nearly the moment he laces his boots. fighting for every inch of control he can. all to save people who won’t ever hear his name or mourn his death -god forbid- if it comes too soon.
loving him isn’t pretty.
just like those damn pictures.
clinging to happy memories of him sleeping soundly with his face buried in your tummy on slow and warm sundays. memorizing his laugh, and holding onto it when the rain outside soaks deeper than your socks after trudging to the grocery store alone. wishing you could buy more than freezer meals, while knowing it’ll go bad if you don’t.
he always eats what you can’t.
and your appetite isn’t right when he’s gone anyways.
there’s only one time those photos feel more hopeful. when he’s been given enough time… or the full knowledge that it isn’t a lie.
always a short message, but god, you never take it for granted. it’s almost worth screenshotting more than the photos themselves.
comin’ home baby, see you soon xx
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comments & reblogs are always appreciated 🤎
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girl-named-matty · 7 months
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Why I don't like Solomon Sallow
(I worked this out on a google docs first and that has some screenshots i couldn't fit into here so after this post imma post some screenshots of the document) SO HI EVERYONE! You'll probably remember what I posted yesterday about dissecting the scene where you first go to Feldcroft in order to find out just a few things about Solomon upfront, so here it is! Buckle up because it is a lot.
Why I dislike Solomon Sallow, by me. 💕 Based on the scene where you first arrive in Feldcroft to visit Anne with Sebastian. 
So I’ve just finished writing this scene for my fanfiction and going over the dialogue so carefully has made me realize just how much from this scene only we can see why Solomon was just a horrible person in general–if it wasn’t already obvious by now. I’ve been wanting to dissect scenes from the game for quite a while now and I think this presents a perfect opportunity to do it! 
First, we’re going to start out when MC first arrives in Feldcroft and Sebastian is standing up on a ‘watch-tower’ to keep an eye on things since Feldcroft hasn’t been safe with all the goblins around. And then he states this: 
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Now, the goblins being around Rookwood castle isn’t Solomon’s fault. But being a resident of Feldcroft and being an ex-Auror, one would assume that he’d at least check it out, correct? Nope. Because Sebastian goes on to say this as well:
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Now at the time, everyone thinks that Anne has been cursed by Goblins and not Rookwood, even Solomon does. But even with Solomon thinking the goblins had cursed Anne, he refuses to confront them even though we know he could since two fifteen-year-olds (Sebastian and MC) could easily defend themselves against said goblins. 
And this leads us into our second segment. 
We are now at the Sallow residence in Feldcroft and Sebastian walks in first, going to surprise Anne. Everything is happy and Anne is extremely excited to see Sebastian as shown in this picture: 
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Sebastian then pulls out a Shrivelfig, something he picked up in Hogsmeade for Anne.
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Now from that screenshot alone, we can’t really tell if Anne just really likes shrivelfigs or if she thought it could be the cure–but from what happens next I can safely assume she may have thought it was some form of cure. 
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Because as shown right here–SOLOMON JUST YOINKS IT OUT OF SEBASTIAN’S HAND. 
Solomon doesn’t give Anne and Sebastian even a moment to have a proper reunion, he doesn’t say hello to Sebastian, or greet MC, he doesn’t wait until MC is out of the house to have a conversation with Sebastian like a civil person would if a guest were around. In fact, he doesn’t do anything civilly, he starts an argument with Sebastian RIGHT there and then over a shrivelfig! 
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He looks at Sebastian and tells him that Shrivelfigs cannot reverse the curse. But we have no background to if they’ve ever even tried to do something with a shrivelfig to even help ease Anne’s pain. Since Hogwarts Legacy came out, the wiki for shrivelfigs has stated that they cannot reverse curses but it does have “medicinal properties' which could’ve at least perhaps eased Anne’s pain for even just a bit. 
But what is even worse is that when he says “Nothing can” he looks DIRECTLY AT ANNE!
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Why would he look directly at Anne while saying nothing can reverse the curse she has? Probably because he wants her to believe that she cannot be cured. He’s tired of trying to find one and so if Anne isn’t complaining about not having a cure, he doesn’t have to hear about it from anyone other than Sebastian. I’ve had conversations with friends about this and have a few theories about this situation but that’s for a different post. Then Solomon proceeds to destroy the Shrivelfig right in front of Sebastian and Anne.
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Now, this is possibly a bit of a stretch but Sebastian got that for Anne and not Solomon so he’s basically just destroying a gift that Sebastian took the time to get for her right in front of the both of them which is a pretty crappy move in my opinion.
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Then he turns to leave, yet again not even taking the time to say hello to Sebastian or MC and of course Sebastian, feeling like he needs to defend himself, says that they haven’t tried everything–which is technically correct. But then of course, instead of Solomon civilly telling Sebastian that there is no cure–It turns into another shouting match.
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He gets up in Sebastian’s face and shouts at him, right in front of Anne and MC. Wow Solomon! I wonder why your nephew hates you. 
Yes I understand that Sebastian is a stubborn boy but at this point in time, he’s a fifteen-year-old boy who is desperate to cure his twin sister! Before this, all he had was Anne and Ominis because his parents were dead and his uncle truly never cared. Let’s say MC had never come into the mix and Anne died, all he would have was Ominis. This is an act of Sebastian trying to preserve the last of the people who love him. 
And then, unfortunately, the effects of the curse start to pain Anne.
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The first thing they do is look over but instead of Solomon immediately going to Anne’s aid, he has to look at Sebastian and blame him for Anne’s pain.
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Then he goes over to Anne to aid her and Sebastian tries to apologize for the argument that Solomon started.
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Then instead of letting Sebastian apologize, Solomon tells Sebastian to leave.
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He doesn’t even give Sebastian a chance. He’s fed up and doesn’t even want his nephew around. My whole guess is that he’s truly never wanted Sebastian around and this was all just an excuse. This leads us into our third segment.  Sebastian storms out of the house and tells MC that he needs a moment alone if they are alright with it. Then MC will go talk to Solomon and Anne and for this, we’re going to speak to Solomon first.  You go up and you greet Solomon, everything seems normal. Solomon apologizes for Sebastian’s behavior claiming “he doesn’t know when to stop” which is true in some cases.
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When he says this, this is not a fact, and we have to keep that in mind. When he says nothing can be done for her–that’s his opinion because HE doesn’t think anything can be done for her. Which opinions are okay to have, but using your opinions to discourage others is usually not the way you want to use them. 
Now after this, MC can say two different things. If you pick the option “Surely there’s something” your MC will say “It could be that you’ve not yet discovered a cure.” so in turn, slightly disagreeing with Solomon’s statement that nothing can be done but not downright disagreeing with him out loud. 
But again, instead of Solomon holding a civil conversation, he starts to accuse MC of thinking they know more than the healers at St. Mungo's. 
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Now did MC ever claim to know better than the trained healers? NO! So why is he assuming this? It’s because he’s incapable of having a civil conversation regarding the curse if anyone disagrees with him in the slightest. We see this several more times throughout the game! 
After this, your MC will say “Perhaps the healers don't know everything, sir.” which is in turn–correct because as skilled as they are, no one knows everything. And keep in mind that MC is calling Solomon “sir” being respectful while Solomon is not, he is shouting and spouting off. MC then follows up with “Sebastian is single-mindedly focused on finding a way to help his sister. If there is a cure, he will find it.”  Then Solomon responds with this.
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Yet again going back to the fact that he could easily confront the goblins but he never does. You have a dialogue choice here but both of them really just lead back to this statement.
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He claims giving Anne hope is cruel because he doesn’t want her to have hope that she can be cured but in my opinion—not giving her hope is just as cruel! Imagine telling your niece, the child you are supposed to be raising, that there is nothing that could possibly cure her and so she is stuck feeling immense pain for the rest of her possibly short life even when there are still chances of finding a cure! I’m not sure about anyone else, but that sounds pretty cruel to me. I can see why you’d want to keep her comfortable but its still keeping her comfortable for her impending death when there’s still a chance she can be cured. 
Then, as if he’s been acting like a good guardian, Solomon plays this card.
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He says he knows what's best for both of the twins–which is clearly not true seeing how he treats Sebastian. Then he goes to say “my stubborn brother’s children” which always makes me think that Solomon had something against his brother–a rivalry possibly–that led them into fighting a lot and so Solomon takes his anger for his late brother out onto his brother's children. Which, keep in mind, is never okay. 
Sebastian is a target of Solomon’s constant attacks because Sebastian acts like his dad. And that’s just the nature of a young boy to act like their father. Also, to Solomon, are you sure your brother was the stubborn one here…?
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Solomon follows up with this and then this.
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THIS ^^ is probably the only sensible thing he says during the entire game. Yes, Sebastian doesn’t know when to stop sometimes but I wonder why he doesn’t stop. It’s because he’s constantly being verbally attacked and Anne is the LAST bit of family he has that actually loves him! Of course he isn’t going to stop–he’s trying to save the life of his twin sister! 
Our fourth segment leads us into our conversation with Anne–which gives us more perspective since we get all three perspectives of the Sallows who were involved in this. 
MC enters the house and apologizes for earlier and Anne–being the sweet girl she is, reassures MC that it is not their fault for the pain she has.
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It’s clear she’s struggling but she always makes sure to make it clear that it is not anyone’s fault when her pain comes and goes. Meaning Solomon was wrong by blaming Sebastian for Anne’s pain during the argument. 
MC and Anne go on to talk about Anne being at Hogwarts and how she misses it but she says she wouldn’t mind being in Feldcroft all the time if it weren’t so dreary. That meaning, the goblin attacks and of course, her uncle and brother fighting all the time.
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She says this but the way she words it makes me think a few things. She mentions that Solomon is fighting with Sebastian whenever he’s home. Which this could be a stretch but that makes me believe that Solomon starts the majority of the arguments that they are in. As seen earlier, Solomon started this one as well instead of letting the scene play out before he jumped in. Not only does Solomon starting arguments affect Sebastian, it affects Anne too! 
MC will then say “Sebastian mentioned something about your uncle being an ex-Auror but refusing to go after Ranrok’s Loyalists'' and while I’m not an uncle, I am an aunt and if someone cursed my niece especially while she was in my care–I’d be burning down the goblin encampment while demanding answers. Then MC says “I must say, I wasn’t prepared for him to be as angry as he was''
Then Anne goes to defend her uncle, which is understandable.
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BUUUUUT then we get into Anne now thinking she cannot be cured, saying that she can feel it.
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Now I am not about to argue with the victim of the curse for saying she doesn’t think she can be cured–after all, she is the one suffering. But from what we saw with Solomon looking directly at Anne while saying “nothing can” referring to nothing can cure her, how much of her disbelief about her being able to be cured is actually coming from Solomon that she has just accepted and isn’t actually her own belief? 
After that, you finish up your conversation with Anne and go to find Sebastian which leads us into our fifth and final segment.
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Now, Sebastian does the same thing Solomon does and apologizes to MC for the way he acted–which means they are sort of the two sides to the same coin when it comes to how others perceive them. Both feel like they need to apologize for something that the other has done–even when only one of them is actually in the wrong. You have two options for dialogue here. You can either choose “He was out of line” which will lead you into saying “I’ll admit, I wasn’t expecting him to be so angry.” or you can chose “He’s trying to do what’s right” which I honestly have no idea what that option will lead you to say because I’ve never chosen it and I went through nine different playthroughs I found on YouTube and nobody chose that option so I assume people agree that he was out of line. (If anyone could tell me what MC says if you chose the option “He’s trying to do what’s right”, that’d be lovely) 
SO if you chose “He was out of line” which leads to you saying the part that you weren’t expecting him to be so angry, Sebastian will reply "He's always angry. He's been angry since my parents died." and "After Anne was hurt, he only grew worse. It's as though he blames me somehow. Always calling me 'my father's son' as if its an insult." (I apologize for the lack of screenshots here, I wrote this out on a google docs sheet before this and tumblr only allows me to have 30 pictures in post so screenshots of the doc are coming soon!) This brings us back to what I said earlier about Solomon deflecting his angry feelings from his late brother onto the twins and he most likely targets Sebastian the most because Sebastian acts the most like his father. Sebastian will go on to say “I’m the one trying to help her. He’s simply given up.” to which MC will reply, “Both Anne and your uncle seem to be genuinely convinced that nothing more can be done for her.” 
To that, Sebastian replies that he refuses to believe that, that Anne’s pain is more than physical, that it’s changed her entirely, and that he misses her and is going to get his sister back. 
After that you’ll go and explore the plateau that Anne was cursed on yada yada and you’ll get a bit of background on that.
So–what's the conclusion of all of this? 
Solomon is just a horrible person. 
He immediately starts an argument with Sebastian in front of Anne and MC over a shrivelfig, no less. And I don’t know about you but it's always so awkward when a friend gets yelled at by their parents/guardian and it's pretty embarrassing when it happens to you and you're the one being shouted at. 
He’s either subconsciously or consciously trying to convince Anne that she cannot be cured by telling her “Nothing can” and by always screaming at Sebastian that nothing can cure her. When he shouts, it's scary, so obviously Anne isn’t going to want to speak up for herself and get screamed at. 
He verbally abuses Sebastian–and probably Anne in the past as well. Now I’ve seen theories that there is possible physical abuse which I have also had theories about but it’s never been proven so I’m not gonna accuse him of such a crime BUT there is obvious evidence that he has no problem verbally abusing Sebastian at all by screaming, shouting and yada yada. 
He’s taking his anger that he has for his late brother out on Sebastian and Anne, which is never okay. Children are never responsible for the sins of the father–and we don’t even know if their father did do anything wrong! From how Solomon acts, he could’ve totally been in the wrong for whatever arguments they had. And Sebastian is a target because he acts the most like his father. 
And although this isn’t in this scene, Solomon has no problem attacking two 15/16-year-olds (who are still legally children) in the catacomb.  So the conclusion is that Solomon Sallow is not a good person and he has no problem showing it. And that you can see so much just from this one scene that probably lasts only a few minutes. 
I rest my case. 
Taglist: @boomingsmile @biographyofanadult @kit-kair @operation-pez @morelikeravenbore @findingtruenorth23 @follesexual @epicsweetness712 @mcyt-trash-can @sallowgauntsupremacy @kukukha-sanctuary
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pathos-logical · 1 year
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How to Keep Doing Descriptions (from someone who does a fuckton)
Plain text: How to Keep Doing Descriptions (from someone who does a fuckton)
This is a list aimed mostly at helping people who already write IDs; for guides at learning how to do them yourself, check my accessibility and image description tags! I write this with close to two years of experience with IDs and chronic pain :)
Get used to writing some IDs by using both your phone and your computer, if you can! I find it easier to type long-form on my laptop, so I set up videos and long comics on my phone, which I then prop up against my laptop screen so I can easily reference the post without constantly scrolling or turning my head
I will never stop plugging onlineocr.net. I use it to ID everything from six-word tags to screenshots of long posts to even comic dialogue! On that last note, convertcase.net can convert text between all-caps, lowercase, sentence case, and title case, which is super helpful
Limit the number of drafts/posts-to-be-described you save. No, seriously. I never go above 10 undescribed drafts on any of my four blogs. It doesn’t have to be that low, but this has done wonders (italics: wonders) for my productivity and willingness to write IDs. If I ever get above that limit, even if it’s two or three more, I immediately either describe the lowest-effort post or purge some, and if I can't do that then I stop saving things to drafts no matter what. No exceptions! Sticking to this will make your life so much easier and less stressful
My pinned post has a link to a community doc of meme description templates!
Ask! For! Help! Please welcome to the stage the People’s Accessibility Server! It’s full of lovely people and organized into channels where you can request/volunteer descriptions and ask/answer questions
I make great use of voice-to-text and glide typing on my phone to save my hands some effort!
Something is always better than nothing!!! A short two-sentence or one-sentence ID is better than no ID at all. Take it easy :)
If you feel guilty about being unable to reblog amazing but undescribed art, try getting into the habit of replying to OP’s post to let them know you liked it! This makes me feel less pressured to ID absolutely everything I see
This is a sillier one, but I tag posts I describe as "described" and "described by me." When saving to drafts, I never preemptively tag with "described by me," since for some reason that always makes me feel extra pressure and extra stress. Consider doing something similar for yourself if that applies!
I frequently find myself looking at pieces of art which feel like they need to be considered for a bit before I can write an ID for them, and those usually get thrown into drafts, where the dread for writing a comprehensive ID just builds. Don’t do that! Instead, try just staying in the reblog field for a bit and focus on the most relevant aspects of the piece. Marinate on them for a little; don’t rush, but don’t spend more than a handful of seconds either. I find after that the art becomes way easier to describe than it initially seemed!
On that note, look for shortcuts that make IDs less taxing for you to do! For example, I only ever describe clothes in art if they're relevant to the piece; not doing that every time saves a lot of time and energy for me personally
Building off of that, consider excusing yourself from a particular kind of ID if you want to. Give yourself a free pass for 4chan posts, or fanart by an artist who does really good but really complex comics, whatever. Let it be someone else's responsibility and feel twice as proud about the work that you can now allot more energy to!
As always, make an effort to find and follow fellow describers! It’s always encouraging to get described posts on your dash, and I find that sometimes I'm happier to ID an undescribed post when the person who put it on my dash is a friend who tagged it with "no ID"
TL;DR: To make ID-writing less stressful and more low-effort, use different devices and software like onlineocr.net and voice-to-text, limit the amount of work you expect yourself to do, and reach out to artists and other describers!
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boyfhee · 1 year
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⌕ TAKE TWO ━━ 19 : all you want
PRECIS. while riki constantly assured you that him being an idol under a different label wouldn't be an issue in your relationship, you start getting second thoughts when fans start shipping him with his co-mc at music bank.
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n : written part after the screenshots
w : slight angst, mild fluff ( finally ) - 1.6k
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the cityscape stood open in front of you, cold winter winds sneaking under your sweatshirt, a scarf from jungwon that has been keeping you warm for the past fifteen minutes doesn’t seem to suffice as the skies turned darker. looking at the horizon, there’s a certain calmness that soothes your heart, the violets and vermillion hues reflecting ever so majestically over the glass panes of skyscrapers. down below lays the distinct city noise, the honking of cars, tires screeching— a near miss. the cat walks across the road safely, and behind you, jungwon lets out a sigh of relief. 
“i’ve never been here,” he chuckles. 
you hum, letting a soft smile climb up your face. “me either,” you look at him. he seems to have loosen up. when he arrived, jungwon definitely looked uneasy, or rather, nervous, in case you didn’t want to talk or even see him. but you’re here, and he’s resting his elbow above the railing, letting himself relax. “are we even allowed to be here?” 
“not sure, but even if we aren’t, no one has to know,” it’s an attempt to lighten the atmosphere, to make you feel better even if it’s only for a brief second. he wishes to hold your hands and tell you that it will be okay. sometimes, words aren’t enough, and jungwon doesn’t want to ask the words, “how have you been?” but alas, he does anyway.
“i don’t know,” it’s a plain reply, a response of ignorance, as if you know exactly what’s happening to you but you can’t seem to process. it’s like having a spatula to stir your dish but you don’t remember how to use it, and so you simply stand there, watching it burn. “maybe, i overreacted the other day. riki has been texting constantly and i’ve been ignoring him. guess, i’m really scared for what’s about to come,” a sigh falls of your lips, you turn to look at him. “good or bad,” 
“well, you made it so far and now we’re so close to the truth,” and jungwon refuses to look at you. perhaps, it’s the weather or the situation, but he doesn’t want to watch you crying, and the reason has to do with both you and riki. “you should talk to him,” he says, half supportive, half defeated. 
if he’s being honest, he doesn’t want you to talk to riki, and if he’s being reasonable, he wishes you would sort things out with him. as said before, it has to do with both of you— one is the love of his life, other being his closest friend. living without either of you seems impossible for jungwon. it’s like an eccentric give and receive, a unique pact, a relationship where all of you are victims and all of you are villains. there’s a hint of jealousy, a heart overflowing with love, a soul drowning in immense pain. 
“what if they’re dating?” you ask, it’s more of a whisper. 
jungwon takes a step towards you. “you don’t know,” 
but, you think you do. trust was something that you never ran out of in this relationship with riki. even now, when everything around has been falling down, when the line between truth and lie has been erased and everything resembles the same, you know a part of you trusts riki. but it’s just a part, just a little corner of your heart lost inside it’s walls and chambers. the trust, it’s like a flickering flame of a candle. your hands are around it, making sure it wouldn’t go out, but you think it would either way. the brightest flames go out first, the longer the candle burns, the shorter it gets. you think you can light another one and replace it but you can’t, because the cold wax has already settled on your hands, and scraping it away would mean taking away a part of yourself. 
“what if they’ve been together all this time and i’m here being fooled? what if he has been lying? what if miya was right all along, won—” at this point, you’re not being yourself. you’re crying, your face is buried in your hands, you’re finally letting loose and coming to terms with loss. you’re close to giving up, taking your hands off the candle and letting the winds blow it out. the words that are possibly a lie are now morphing into the truth for you. it feels like you’re watching your lover walk away to someone else while the red strings still hold you together, and you’re doing nothing but looking for the scissors. 
so, jungwon pulls you into his arms. “we don’t know anything yet,” 
those are the words the world relies upon. people look forward to a surprise because you don’t know what it’s going to be. they’re hooked on thrillers because they don’t know the ending. they hope because who knows, maybe things will change for the better one day. the lack of knowledge is incredible and equally dangerous. you’re stupidly lucky and luckily stupid. while one moment, you thank the heavens for keeping you in dark all this time for you don’t know if you can handle facing the truth; the other, you wonder if things would have been different if only you knew. 
your thoughts are laced with irony, there’s a sense of indecisiveness in your actions. your words are uncertain. 
you don’t know anymore. 
“what did i do to deserve this?” and you cry harder, a few centimeters closer into his arms, a consoling hand on your back that feels warmer. you’re spilling tears on his jacket, he doesn’t seem to mind. the city noise fades into the background as your ears fill with the loud silence along with your soft sobs. if someone was to see you like this, you both will be on the headlines the next day. besides, you don’t have an explanation as for why you were crying relentlessly in jungwon’s arms. you’re concerned, but he doesn’t seem to care. so, you don’t know why you worry about media.
you never knew why riki worried so much about them.
“i’m sorry i can’t help more than telling you the same words over and over again,” his words aren’t much louder than yours, almost just as muffled, if not more. “shit, i’m so fucking sorry for not being able to help,” he holds you closer, his voice shaking, you’re scared he might just be crying on his own, over matters that aren’t even his to being with.
“are you stupid?” and you pull away, sniffling, an awkward chuckle falling off your lips at the sight of wet patches on his clothing. “you’ve helped me more than anyone else, won,” 
he awkwardly brushes off the strand of hair in front of your eyes. “i wish i could do more,” 
jungwon doesn’t take credit. well, mostly, he does, but for some things, he doesn’t, and those things are the ones that count the most. perhaps, it’s how a leader is supposed to be. he shares his efforts and achievements. anything he does, it’s for the group, it adds into the accounts of all seven members. you don’t know how that logic is applicable right now, but it sure does has an impact on him. 
jungwon is so used to sharing, he doesn’t remember how it feels to have something that belongs to him and only him. it’s not a bad thing. you’d never know how it feels to be in his place, but sometimes, it feels like jungwon has forgotten how to live for himself.
“what did i do to deserve you?” those are the words that water the flowers blooming in his heart. you take a step behind, turning to the city scape again. wind strikes cold on your tear stained cheeks, you rub it off on your sleeves. “seriously though, you’ve always been there when i needed you, always down to listen to my complaints and endless rants about riki. i don’t think words can express how thankful i am,” 
and jungwon is looking at you— eyes ever so starry, inexplicably in disbelief and desperately in love. “and i don’t know why you helped me so much,” 
“because i like you,” and words slip off his tongue like they’re the water flowing down the stream. there’s a pause, a look of surprise from your side, guilt pouring on his part. you could feel your heart trying to beat out of your chest, you don’t know the last time you’ve felt this way. “not the very best time, is it?” 
but jungwon brushes the silence off with a forced laughter, or rather, tries to. it’s the least he can do to cover up his mistakes. the last thing he wants is to make sure his unplanned confession doesn’t make him look like a backstabber, as if he was trying to get his own way to you through your misery. “don’t think so much about it. it’s just a crush, it’ll go away. you should be focusing on your boyfri—”
fluttering gazes, a step taken towards him involuntarily. you kiss jungwon— a decision made out of impulse.  
“does that make it seem like i’m using you?” you pull away, and now the guilt was for both of you to handle. emotions are playing their part, mind out of order, logic off the terrace of your label that you are currently standing on. right or wrong, it’s hard to differentiate.
nothing makes sense, yet everything in his moment with him fits together like a puzzle piece. 
so, his hands are cupping your cheeks. “you can use me all you want,” and your lips are back onto his. 
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n : YNWON NATION HOW DO WE FEEL
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feelbokkie · 10 months
Text
Don’t Let Me Love You | Chapter 19
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pairing: Felix x fem reader; Chan x fem reader
genre: smau, fake dating, crack, angst, fluff, non!idol au
pov: 1st/2nd person (depending on how you view it)
warnings: swearing, Bai, mild violence
summary: With the upcoming wedding of her cousin and her ex, Y/n is in desperate need of a date for the wedding that will show the happy couple that she moved on.
word count: 2,857
screenshot count: 1
a/n: event of the year!
©feelbokkie (2023) — all rights reserved. reposting/modification of any kind is not tolerated.
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backstory unlocked: Chan and Bai
You can see Chan's mouth moving but you can't hear a word he's saying. Your heart is beating so fast and loud in your ears, you're slightly concerned you might be stuck like this forever.
"Y/n, say something, ple—"
Smack
"What the actual fuck is wrong with you?" You spit. Your sadness from earlier is now replaced by anger. Chan stays hunched over in pain for a second, clutching his cheek trying to process that you had slapped the absolute shit out of him.
He finally straightens himself out and looks at you with tears in his eyes, his hand still on his cheek. His lips parted in a silent surprise and his eyes blinking slowly, taking it all in. You can see the red poking out on the skin around his fingers.
"It’s the night before your wedding, what are you doing?” You are mentally and physically exhausted by Chan's mind games and want nothing to do with them.
“I know, I know but—“
"But? But what, Chan? In a little over 12 hours, you going to be a married man, you do realize that, right?"
"Y/n, just let me explain--"
"Fuck that! You had 3 years to explain. And the last time you tried to explain something to me it destroyed me. So no thanks, I rather be an ignorant fool than listen to whatever bullshit answer you have preloaded."
"Please--" Chan leans forward, arm outstretched towards you. Before he could touch you, Felix jumps in between you. Felix's back blocks your view of Chan and you don't make an effort to try to see past it.
"Back the fuck up or I swear I'll give you a black eye to match that welt on your face. Actually, I should beat the shit out of you for kissing Y/n but I'm feeling generous. Consider this a wedding present." Felix threatens. His deeper voice is in full volume, intimidating even you.
"I'm sorry, Y/n. I really am." Chan's voice cracks as he heads back into the venue.
You let out a deepth breath that you didn't even know you were holding in. Angry tear fall from your eyes, warming your cool cheeks. You lean forward, resting your head on Felix's back, letting out silent sobs. Your hand hands grip the fabric of his shirt, in an effort to bury yourself into him and hide from the world.
The fact of the matter is, all you've wanted to hear from Chan for the past three years is that he's still in love with you. Two months ago you would have jumped at the chance to be with him again he told you that he is still in love with you. You've dreamed about him saying those exact words for years. You craved to feel l his lips on yours again, the missing piece to your puzzle. Even though all of your dreams finally came true, you can't help but feel empty. Like Chan is no longer the answer you needed. Like he was a missing piece to an entirely different puzzle that was already boxed up and thrown in an attic.
Felix's hands reach behind his back and gently pull your hands off his shirt and turns around, wrapping you in a warm embrace. One hand flat on you back and the other on your head, holding you as close to him as humanly possible. You nose if flooded with the familiar scent of his cologne mixed with coffee, cinnamon, and sugar.
"My hand hurts," You mumble.
"I would be surprised if it didn't, you slapped the shit out of him. He'll be lucky if he wakes up tomorrow without your handprint on his face." You could feel the vibrations from Felix's laughing on your cheek, you can't help but softly smile.
"He kissed me," You say quietly. You're not entirely sure if you're telling Felix or yourself.
"I know. I saw. I was leaving...to give you two some privacy. But then I heard the slap and ran back. I was worried, but I didn't need to be, you took care of yourself."
"Still, thanks for stepping in when you did. He was like two seconds away from causing a scene and the last thing I need tonight is to deal with Bai and her dramatic ass."
"You wish is my command," Felix places a kiss on the top of your head and peels you off of him before quickly disappearing into the venue. A few minutes later, he come back out with your stuff in his hands. He gives you your bag and throws his jacket over your shoulders.
"Let's go,"
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"What are you two doing here?" You ask when you run into Changbin and Jisung in the hallway of the wedding venue.
Bai has had you running around since early this morning getting last-minute things ready for today. Luckily for you, she was stuck on the bridal suite getting ready and you'd do anything to not being in a room with her for an unspecified amount of time.
"He's being an ass right now, but we weren't going to just not show up to his wedding," Changbin grumbles. He came to you the second Chan banned him, Jisung, and Minho from the wedding under Bai's direct orders.
"Yeah, and to help out when we can since Lucas is going to be the only one in his party," Jisung adds.
"You two are really good friends. Just stay out of sight. The last thing we need is for Bai to have a full meltdown and take it out on me." You sigh. They both salute you before walking off into the main chapel of the venue.
You look around the walkway to make sure everything is perfect. It's been a bittersweet morning as you explored the venue. Every single detail was stolen from your pages in the shared wedding binder, down to the colors of the flower petals that were to be thrown down the aisle. You wouldn't be surprised if Bai also stole your pretend vows that you wrote in there just to spite you.
You take a deep breath, only two more hours and this shit show is over. Only two more hours and your fake relationship with Felix is over. Felix came with you to the venue too, he insisted. He spent the night at your apartment after last night and thought it would be best if he tagged along. You even stopped by his apartment to get his clothes for today.
"Noona!" You turn around to find Lucas running towards you. His eyes are in a panic. He hunches over, catching his breath.
"What's wrong?" You question slightly panicking as well.
"It's Chan hyung, he says he needs you. He locked himself in the groom's suite and refuses to let anyone in." He pants.
"Lucas, I can't--"
"Please, noona? For me? I'm worried about him." He slightly sticks his lower lip out and looks at you with puppy dog eyes. Manipulation must run in the family.
"Fine, just don't say anything to Bai." You huff.
You walk into the main chapel and grab Felix, who is chatting with Changbin and Jisung while they finish lining the seats with flowers.
"What's going on?" Felix asks as he lets you drag him around.
"Chan is apparently having a crisis and needs me specifically. I have a feeling he's trying to pull something so I need you to stand outside the door just in case." You quickly explain.
"Yeah, okay. I can do that." You stop when you reach the door to the groom's suite.
You hesitate before knocking.
"Chan, open the door, it's me." You say loudly. You and Felix stand in silence waiting before you hear the door unlock. You two share a look before you quietly walk in, purposely leaving the door unlocked behind you.
Chan is pacing the room with his hands behind his back. He's fully dressed in his tux and his hair is perfectly slicked back, a single strand purpose falling out in the front.
"What's going on?" You ask confused. You've never seen him like this before.
"I can't do this." He pulls on his tie and loosens it.
"Chan--"
"Tell me to leave," He stops suddenly and faces you. His eyes are tired and sore, his bottom lip trembling. The faint outline of your handprint is still slightly visible on his cheek. He's a mess.
"What?" You're taken aback by the request.
"I meant what I said last night, Y/n. I'm still in love with you and I can't marry Bai, I can't keep doing this to myself. Run away with me." He stretches his hand towards you.
"I can't,"
"It'll be better this time. I'll be better this time. I promise." He steps closer to you, hand still out.
"No, I'm not going to even give hope that this is going to work out the way that you think it is. Because I know for a fact that if I did run away with you, I won't ever be happy. I will be forever stuck in hell waiting for you to fuck up and wreck my life again. I can't do that. Not again. I deserve to be happy."
"I can make you happy, I promise." He pleads
"No, you won't. And I'm not going to leave Felix for you. I'm not built like you and Bai, I actually care about the people I love. Enough to stay." You spit.
"You're still in love with me. I know that deep down you are so--"
"No, I'm not. I'm in love with Felix." Your heart skips a beat.
"Y/n, please." You watch as a stream of tears falls down his face.
"Look, I'm not going to make the decision to stay for you. If you're so unhappy, then grow a pair and leave but don't drag me with you. I'm done." You huff before leaving Chan alone in the room, crying.
***
You, Hannah, and Barry, who is the ring bearer, wait in the hall so you can walk start the wedding. The only problem, Chan is nowhere to be found. You watch as Lucas walks back holding a paper. You tightly squeeze your eyes shut and pinch the bridge of your nose.
"I found this in the room. It's for Bai noona." Lucas states.
You quickly poke your head into the main chapel and scan the room, quietly cursing under your breath when you can't find Changbin or Jisung.
"Shit," You breathe, "Okay, Lucas, go give that to Bai and then leave immediately. She's less likely to kill you but once she reads whatever on that letter she won't care. Hannah, take Barry and gather both my parents and your parents. Take them off to the room in the side and let them know what happened. I'll deal with Bai while she's having her meltdown."
Hannah and Lucas nod before going off in separate directions. This is all your fault. You didn't think Chan would actually run from the altar. That he was just having pre-martial jitters and would get over them. Bai is going to murder you when she finds out.
You watch as Lucas sprints past you and into the main chapel, probably to be with the safety of his parents. You don't blame him, you would be doing the same thing right now.
"You!" Bai shouts walking down the hall towards you. Her eyes are blazing murderously at you.
"Bai, I know that you're mad but keep your voice down. Your guests are still inside." You say calmly.
"I don't give a single fuck if they can hear me. You did this. You made him leave." She throws the letter at your feet.
"I didn't make him do anything. He decided to leave on his own."
"Oh bullshit, we both know I had him wrapped around my fingers until you got your little harpy talons in him." Bai's face is quickly turning red and the veins in her neck are standing out in livid ridges.
"Bai--"
"Why do you keep stealing what's mine?" She cries out.
"What have I ever stolen that was yours?" You clench your fist, anger growing in the pit of your stomach.
"Chan, Felix, my parents for fucks sake!"
"Felix is right, you are an insufferable cunt."
"And you're--"
"No! You've done enough talking our whole lives, it's my turn. You need to stop blaming me for every little thing that goes wrong in your life. I'm sorry your parents died, I really, truly am but you seriously cannot blame me for that. I had no control over that situation."
"The only reason why we were out was for you."
"I know, and I've felt guilty about it since it happened, but it's not like I purposely made that man drink and then get in his car. And I didn't steal Chan or Felix."
"You knew that Felix and I were together before you started dating."
"No, I didn't. Do you want to know why? Because Felix and I aren't together. We're just faking it to get through this shitshow of a wedding. Happy?"
"God, you're pathetic." She laughs.
"Yeah, you're right I am. But not as pathetic as you."
"What are you talking about?"
"Bai, nobody here likes you, they all feel sorry for you. My parents. Chan's parents. Every other guest waiting in that chapel. Hell, Chan probably felt sorry for you and only stayed after you lost the baby. At least I have people in my life who genuinely like me." You slowly walk towards her, closing the gap between the two of you. You know you're going too far, but this is a lifetime's worth of pent-up feelings coming out. And even then, you're not angry enough.
"God you are a dumb bitch," She laughs harder. She's losing it.
"What?"
"There was no baby you stupid slut."
"What are you-- You didn't,"
"Do you honestly think that I would be stupid enough to let myself get pregnant? Honestly, use your head."
"You are a vile piece of shit. Literal human garbage,"
"And you should have died in that car accident instead of my parents. If you think about it, this is all your fault. Chan wouldn't be so unhappy if it weren't for you. It's only a matter of time before you fuck up Felix too so why don't you do us all a favor and go ki--"
"Im Bai-Mi! That is enough!" Bai freezes in place at the mention of her full name. You both turn to find yours and Chan's staring at the two of you, the doors to the main chapel open. You're not sure how much they heard but the look on everyone's faces tells you that they at least hear the last bit.
"Auntie, uncle, y-you don't understand. She tricked me! She took advantage of me in my fragile state and--"
"I made a promise to my late sister that I would take care of you if anything happened to her and I have failed her. I've let you run around with your horrible attitude for far too long thinking that you just needed to cope in your own way, but this is it. I have to put my daughter and her happiness first. Y/n, I'm sorry I was so blind before, I didn't realize how truly awful she's been treating you."
"It's okay Mom, it's not your fault. Your intentions were in the right place," You softly smile at her. It'll take a while before your relationship with your parents is perfect, but this is a start.
"This isn't fair! My fiance leaves me and you're all ganging up on me!" Bai screams before leaving the venue.
Everyone awkwardly stands around, not sure what to do next. You watch as your parents profusely apologize to Chan's family on Bai's behalf. You take a deep breath, probably the deepest one you've ever taken, and sigh in relief, a large weight disappearing from your chest.
Your parents, along with Chan's parents, walk back into the chapel, probably to apologize to the guest again.
"You okay?" Felix asks, coming up beside you.
"Yeah actually," You smile, turning to look at Felix.
"Do you want to get away from here? We can go to this really good bbq place that's around the corner."
"You don't have to spend time with me anymore, Lix."
"What?" He furrows his eyebrows in confusion and tilts his head.
"The contract. This arrangement is only supposed to last until the end of the wedding and well, it's clearly over." You watch as his smile drops.
"Yeah, but--" You turn your body towards him and quickly kiss his cheek, placing a hand on his shoulder to help you reach.
"Thank you for your help these past few months. I genuinely had fun. I'm eternally grateful for all you've done. I'm sorry for intruding in your life. Take care, Felix." You smile sadly before turning and walking to the main chapel to help your parents clean up Bai's mess for the last time.
Buy me a coffee?
Tag list:
Red means that it wouldn't let me tag you
@primoppang @junebug032 @jaydebow @streetrebelrootsdistinguish @sanriiolino @hyynee @muddy-waters @usercaiskz @skzofhearts @qweebsarse @amara-mars @stayconnecteed @blueforte @soonyoungblr @dandycharmer @hibuki-chan @jihanlovic @fylithia @chlodavids @its-hannjisung @hash2013 @felixglow @procrastinationprodigy @tfshouldidohere @weebsrequiem @swiftly-heart @mybabywearschanel @end0rchans @curly-fr13s @stvrfir3 @qveenbibi @pink-rose-chans-baby @sserafimez @yennifersgeralt @gemisea @farfromsugafanfic @veedoesntknaur @felixrealbabymama @mrsseals16 @rag-iii @captivq @idkwimdahyd
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void-wolfie · 11 months
Text
We Had Matching Wounds. Mine's Still Black and Bruised.
summary: Jenna's still grieving after you walk out on her, but you've already moved on.
pairing: Jenna Ortega x gn!Reader
tw: angst, maybe depression(?)... not exactly sure, let me know if I need to add something
words: 960
a/n: thanks to the anon who suggested The Exit by Conan Gray... wrote this pretty late at night so it might be trash who knows lol
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Jenna's apartment was a mess; clothes splayed across every surface, dirty dishes stacked a mile high, and a pile of laundry that hadn't been done in weeks. All in all, it was safe to say she wasn't ok, not by a long shot.
She had barricaded herself in her room long ago. Refusing to move unless it was absolutely necessary, which wasn't often. She'd drowned herself in one of your oversized hoodies and a nest of blankets. If she wasn't asleep or crying, she was staring blankly at the ceiling or mindlessly scrolling through her phone.
A notification popped up across her phone. She stared at the headline, thinking about clicking on it. The dull numbness that’d consumed her days gave way to heartache the longer she stared.
Y/N and pop singer Olivia Rodrigo officially confirm their relationship!
She was finally at a place where she wasn't gnawed away by guilt and heartache every second of the day, a sort of depressive numbness settling in. But she knew seeing you with a new girlfriend would crush her, making the reality of your breakup all too real, all the more final. But at the same time, curiosity was eating away at her. The hope that maybe it was clickbait or fake news was naively tugging at the back of her mind.
Against her better judgment, she clicked on the article.
Everyone says a picture is worth a thousand words. A thousand words wouldn't begin to cover the extent of pain Jenna was feeling.
There at the front of the article was a screenshot from your Instagram. A post of you and Olivia kissing, with the caption; Happy three months, love &lt;;3.
She felt sick to her stomach. She probably would've puked on the spot had she actually eaten anything in the past two days.
Three months. Those words shattered her already fragile heart.
Three months... The two of you broke up only four months ago.
She could still remember the night it all went wrong, like a broken record stuck on repeat.
"y/n?" She called out, setting her stuff down on the kitchen table.
It was a miserable day, it'd been raining all day and thunder could be heard in the distance. The run from her car to the front door left her soaked from the cold rain.
"y/n?" She called out again, only to get no response.
She padded into your shared bedroom, her hair leaving tiny water drops across the tile floor as she shivered in her wet clothes.
She stopped in her tracks. There was a suitcase on the bed full of your stuff, and you were packing more in.
"What's going on?"
"I'm leaving." You didn't spare her a glance, you knew if you did you'd only be inclined to stay. Those big brown eyes of hers would always be your weakness.
"Leaving?" You weren't leaving her, were you? Sure your relationship had been on the rocks as of late, countless arguments and nights spent yelling. But had it really gotten this bad?
"I can't do this anymore, Jenna."
"Do what?"
"This. Us." You closed the suitcase, zipping it up, still refusing to look at her, "The arguing, the late nights coming home, always feeling like your second choice. I just can't do it anymore."
You finally looked at her, seeing tears streaming down her freckled face. It broke your heart, but you had to protect yourself. Even if that meant breaking her.
"Do you even know what it feels like Jenna? To feel like your second choice? You come home late every other night, you're gone for months at a time, and you lie about who you're with and where you go. Do you even remember the last time you said ‘I love you’?"
"I..." She wanted to refute everything you'd said, but she couldn't. She couldn't remember the last time you had a movie night together or even ate dinner at the same table. She couldn't remember the last time she said those three words.
You had tears of your own streaming down your face, "3 months ago. You haven’t said it in three months."
Jenna was in a stupor. Her whole world was crumbling before her, and she was lost on how to fix it.
How had you moved on so quickly? It felt like only yesterday she was so deep in love, falling into a black hole of bliss with only you on her mind. She thought you felt the same, and maybe you did. But you'd already replaced her. With one of her friends, no less.
Jenna skipped reading the article. She didn't want some reporter's half-assed observations and opinions on your dating life. They didn't know you, and she could care less about their opinion.
She clicked over to Instagram, despite her shaking hands and teary eyes, and tortured herself with your latest post.
You looked happy. There were all kinds of pictures of you and Olivia together. Pictures of you two dancing in the rain, swimming at the lake, even one at that club she never had the time to take you to. Not to mention the abundance of candid photos fans had tagged the two of you in. Pictures of the two of you kissing, the two of you visiting that little ice cream shop by the beach, some at that little cafe by your house that had your favorite coffee.
To say it was agony was an understatement. There weren't words for her pain. She could never effectively describe the heartache that left her crying for hours on end, breathless and shaky from the exertion.
It hurt knowing she carved out her own heart for you and in the end, her downfall was her own doing.
You already found someone to miss, while I'm still standin' at the exit.
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sideblogforweirdshit · 6 months
Text
Whump Reference Post for First, Second, and Third Degree Burns
Hi whump writers of Tumblr! Sorry it's been a hot minute; turns out grad school is hard. Anyways, I'm back with another reference post!
There is one image in this post, but there are no graphic images. It's a screenshot of text.
However, I do get a little bit graphic with my descriptions, as I'm trying to provide material that will help with writing, so read with care.
There are six categorizations of burns. They range from first degree (sunburn level) to sixth degree (exposed and/or charred bone).
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In the interest of brevity (and also my limited knowledge), I'm going to only address the first, second, and third degree categories of burns. I have various information about each type of burn in each of their sections, and then I go more in depth on the pain associated with each type at the end of the post.
First Degree
Definition:
First degree burns are superficial, and affect only the outer layer of skin (epidermis).
Possible causes:
Mild sunburn, hot water.
Appearance:
First degree burns will be red, dry, and have no blisters.
Pain:
First degree burns are minimally painful in the moment, and negligibly painful afterwards. The skin becomes itchy as it heals, which may come any time from hours to a day or so after the initial burn.
Ideal treatment:
Run the burn under cold water, or apply cold compresses. (You’ll see some people writing about putting cold mud or dirt on these. That not decrease the pain. The tiny particles of dirt will rub all against the sensitive burned skin like sandpaper.)
Apply normal antibiotic ointment and bandage if desired, but honestly it’s not really necessary as long as the skin isn’t broken.
This can be treated at home.
Healing time:
Generally takes less than a week to heal.
Second Degree
Definition:
Second degree burns involve the epidermis and part of the dermis (the thicker layer of skin under the epidermis).
Possible causes:
Brief contact with boiling water, 1-2 seconds contact with hot metal (hot like a pan on a mid-heat stove, not hot like white-hot), some mid-level sunburn, etc. They're the most common type of burn.
Appearance:
Second degree burns will have shiny skin and the skin will be visibly discolored.
There may also be blisters that form within the first 24 hours. The blisters will be a very thin layer of skin that will fill up with fluid like a bubble. If you gently push on a part of this bubble, you can see the fluid move to the other side. Depending on the area of the body in which this burn occurs, the skin of this blister can be very delicate, and a lot of care needs to be taken in order to keep it unbroken (recommended for healing to protect against infection). If the blister breaks or comes off, the skin beneath will be red, wet, and slimy to the touch.
Pain:
These burns are very painful.
Immediately after the initial burn, it will be a strong and consistent pain. Ice can be applied or the burn can be submerged in cold water. If this is not done for long enough however, removal of the ice / cold water will bring back the pain in one or two minutes.
If the blister breaks, there is a significant increase in pain. Ideally, you shouldn't touch the exposed gooey skin because of the risk of contaminating it with the bacteria on your fingers. However, if you want to cause a lot of low-cost mid-to-high-level pain for a brief moment, your whumper can jam their finger right on that exposed wound. Salt and other granular substances are also extremely effective here; the nerves are primed for more pain. After a while however, this will have lesser and lesser of an effect, as the place becomes almost numb.
The blisterless open wound is a highway for bacteria. If you want to reduce infection risk, you need to clean it out thoroughly after the salt situation (which is also painful!) and then bandage it.
Keeping the burn bandaged will reduce the pain. Some doctors recommend temporarily covering a new burn with cling wrap until the burned person can get to a medical professional or treat the wound themselves. Oddly, regular cling-wrap does actually reduce the pain significantly.
Ideal treatment:
If the object that caused the burn wasn't clean, the burned area should be gently cleaned with soap and water.
One should then run the burned area under cold water for at least five and up to thirty minutes.
If the skin is broken, an antibiotic ointment and bandage should be applied. If the skin is unbroken, bandage anyways, but antibiotic ointment isn’t as necessary.
The burn should be kept covered for at least the first few days. If skin was broken, the area should be covered until new skin grows over.
This can be treated at home.
Healing time:
Depending on the size, depth, and complications, this can take anywhere from a week (for small burns) to several months to heal.
Third Degree
Definition:
Third degree burns go all the way through both the epidermis and the dermis and may go into the hypodermis (the subcutaneous layer of skin that has the fat).
Possible causes:
Prolonged contact with stovetop-level-hot metal, prolonged exposure to flames from a fire, prolonged contact with or submersion in boiling water, acidic or basic chemicals, dry ice.
Appearance:
The burned part itself may be white or black. This is because the skin level that contains the blood vessels (the dermis) has been burned through.
The outer edges of the burned area may only be second degree, depending on how the burn was administered, and blisters may form here.
After a day or two, the very outer edge of the burned area will form a surrounding line of red. This is granulated tissue, and is a sign of the body trying to heal itself.
The area within an inch or two of the burn may become slightly red, swollen, and hot to the touch. As long as this is slight, this is normal, and not infection. The area of the body is just traumatized and working overtime.
Scarring will definitely occur. If the burned area is large, skin grafts may minimize the scarring.
Pain:
These types of burns aren’t really painful. There is of course the initial piercing pain shock when the hot object comes into contact with the skin, but after the skin layers that contain the nerves have been burned through, the pain is negligible (if there at all). This burn looks terrifying, and like it should be absolutely agonizing, but it’s not even close to that. There may be some slight pain around the outsides of the burn, where the skin is minimally affected, but most of the area will be nearly numb.
Ideal Treatment:
The area should be cleaned thoroughly, and I mean thoroughly. The outside layer of dead skin should be scraped off when cleaning with soap and water. Leaving the dead skin there may impede healing, and as long as the wound is covered with something, risk of infection isn’t too significant.
Antibiotic ointment and a bandage and gauze should be applied to absorb everything that leaks out (if the skin is broken, pus will leak out).
If the burn encompasses more than a small area (or a narrow area) skin grafts are recommended.
This can technically be treated at home, as long as there’s no infection.
Healing time:
Smaller burns generally take at least three weeks to heal. Larger burns can take years.
More In Depth On The Pain
First degree burns tend to feel "just the wrong side of warm" when they first occur, and shortly afterwards tend to feel kind of prickly. A longer time afterwards, it will be overly sensitive and warm to the touch, and will be uncomfortable to put clothing over. As the burn heals, the sensitivity will turn into mild itchiness.
Second degree burns are a sharp pain. If it's a quick cause (boiling water that quickly falls off, hot metal quickly removed), it's likely that the brain won't initially register the heat, just the sharp sting. Within a minute or so, that sting will increase significantly. As said before: running the area under cold water, or covering it with ice will reduce the pain, but it'll come back quite quickly once you remove the cold source. If you can suffer through the initial 5-10 minutes of the increased stinging, it'll fade enough that you can think rationally again. Longer term: the blister itself is not necessarily painful, but if the skin covering it breaks, the stinging pain from before will resurface (at a lower level, but longer-lasting).
Third degree burns start out with the same sharp pain as second degree, but that pain fades as the nerves in the skin are burnt out and killed. Depending on the vector of heat, this can be extremely quick (very hot metal will cause the sharp second degree pain to fade within the minute) or much slower (slowly heating water in which someone's body part lies will have a much longer period of the sharp second degree pain, and will be much more agonizing than the metal). Once the nerves are burned through, there comes a kind of numbness. The nerves at the very edge of the burn are still alive and somewhat functioning, and there will likely be a bit of sharpness there, but the majority of the affected area will be free from any sensation. The worst part of this type of burn isn't the pain, but the intrinsic horror that it's such a significant deformity that there is no pain. The numbness will continue after the initial burn and into the healing stage, to the point where the affected person might not even remember they're injured until they feel the liquid from the burn trickle down over their skin. As the healing progresses, the itchiness will be absolutely maddening. The area must be covered by something because the affected person will likely unconsciously scratch at it to try to get some relief. Any scratching will set back the healing process a significant amount.
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