#learning about its facts will be useful and essential.
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i am not in a Positive Mood atm and so i will be picking a bone with disney because there is one song that has frustrated me since the day i heard it and i vow here and now that one day i will rewrite it and that song is My Once Upon A Time from descendants 3
for context, the song comes right after all of mal's closest friends and her fiance have just been turned to stone. unless she can find a way to turn them back, they are - for all intents and purposes - dead, essentially. and, as she says in the song, its her fault. i dont 100% agree with that, but its not the bit i want to pick at
no, what id like to rant about is the fact that the whole song - the whole song - is her talking about how she needs to fix it because its not how she wants to be remembered. what?! im sorry, her friends have been turned to stone and shes concerned about whether she'll be portrayed as a hero in history books? what the fuck.
allow me to point to a song that achieved exactly what mouat shouldve: the next right thing, from frozen 2. in this song, anna learns her sister is dead, because olaf (who's life relies on elsa) dies in her arms. anna's song shows how she picks herself back up, not for herself but because she has people relying on her who need her. because its the right thing to do. not because she wants to be seen as a saviour, but because she wants to save the lives of everyone still in danger. shes already lost her sister, she doesnt want to lose her kingdom, her people, too.
tnrt in frozen 2 was an impactful and emotional moment. mouat in d3 showed mal brushing off the fact her friends were gone and instead focused on her reputation. and i get it - i get that the whole point of the descendants trilogy was that you get to write your own story, and that nobody is wholly good or bad, and that youre in control of your own decisions and whether they help or hurt - but this should be a moment of pure emotion for mal as she recognises how her own actions have led to the loss of her friends, but that she has to carry on if she ever wants a chance to save them; to save everyone. it should not be focused on her being good for the sake of reputation
and, to add to this, im fully aware that throughout the three movies, we see how mal values other people's perception of her, especially so at the start of d2, and then again at the start of d3 both as her role as future queen, and when she doesnt tell her isle friends that it was her call to keep the barrier closed. shes afraid of how theyll see her, yes, but we had the character growth during d2 where mal became more confident about not fitting with the perfect princess look (represented by her transformation into the dragon, and continued use of such magic despite it coming from her evil mother, as well as her dress changing from auradonion colours to her signature purple), so any insecurities there shouldve been wrapped up. and her lies in d3 were, ultimately, for the good of everyone, and only temporary. the barrier had to stay closed until they could figure out a way for it to be safe for everyone. if she had let them bring down the barrier too soon and a villain had caused chaos, then that would ruin the chances of the barrier ever coming down forever. and if she had told her friends - specifically evie - that it was her call, then she knew that evie would convince her to change her mind. but changing her mind at that point was not for the greater good, therefore she lied. as much as a small amount of it was for her reputation among her friends, it was also for the good of auradon and the isle
therefore i refuse to believe that muoat shouldve been focused wholly on her reputation. we know mal cares so much about her friends and about ben, so why didnt the song dive into that? why were we not looking at her guilt, or her determination to carry on so that she could save her loved ones and her home? why, instead, did we focus so hard on the way she wants to be remembered for her heroics and good deeds?
i also understand that mal may be compartmentalising to an extent, by ignoring her own grief for her friends and instead focusing her attention elsewhere to keep herself going. she very clearly does have insecurities about her decisions and her role in auradon, so it would make sense to distract herself with that rather than letting herself break down over her friends. if this was what they intended, though, i think it was poorly done. at least, i certainly wouldnt have brushed past it quite so nonchalantly. mal hardly seemed to care that her friends had been turned to stone after the first - what - two lines of the song? and even then all she says is that she deserves it. she deserves it?? like it had just been a shove in the playground or something, and not an attack on her loved ones - one that, remember, could very well result in her losing them forever
quite literally, her only lines in the song about losing her friends are: "here you are alone and you deserve it // your friends have turned to stone and thats on you" and that is it. everything else is about her story being written, or about serving a cause, or her reputation not being linked to her parents'
i really do not like this song. i havent watched d3 for over a year, so i do apologise if ive missed/forgotten important context, but from everything i remember and listening to the song itself, i do not believe it does the moment justice. i want to rewrite it one day, ive no idea if i ever will or how, but i dont like it the way it is.
#yes#i really did just go on a very long rant about a song in a childrens film#but i have already had a very bad day and the song came on and i needed to say something#descendants 3#disney descendants#descendants#disney#disney songs#dorian speaks
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Node.Js Development: Important Facts And Features | Dew Studio
#JavaScript is widely used for developing standard or even advanced custom software. Node.js is everything developers need and look for with#which encourages developers to produce advanced and diversified software applications.#Applications of PayPal#Netflix#Uber#eBay and many others are a few longstanding examples of Node.js’ exemplary possibilities. If you want your organization to enjoy one such r#then choose DEW Studio#the top low-code app development platform for your next software development projects.#Server-centric or Server Side programming powers of Node.js elevate every app development process when combined with JavaScript frameworks.#Let us uncover the important facts and features about node.js.#Discover 12 Interesting Node.Js Facts And Features#To choose Node.js#learning about its facts will be useful and essential.#A server engine at its core#Node.js#works only after you properly set it up and alter it to fulfil your needs.#It is part of the community of JavaScript. So this allows developers to alter or manipulate it with User Interfaces#JS tools and also connectors.#Node.js is completely open source. Additionally#it is a building framework that perfectly allows developers for cross-platform or hybrid mobile app development.#Your familiarity with JavaScript will help you to understand and use Node.js very easily. That is why node js is famous. You can hire a top#JavaScript is the easiest to work with. But it is Node.js that unleashes its true potential making it wonderful for every kind of web and m#Google’s V8 engine powers Node.js to run in the backend#while JavaScript runs in the front end with Google Chrome. Even Google itself mentions Node.js as its honorary#along with additional engine power structures.#Chrome 57+ has a Node.js debugging feature to eliminate errors from front-end and backend processes.#The JavaScript Object Notation – JSON is one stable#realistic and common data exchanging format. It is highly easy to create APIs with JSON.#Node.js group is always accommodating to exchanging its core bundles. Sharing becomes simple and effective. This answers why node js is bet#Node Package Manager [NPM] is used and its in-depth support has propelled growth Possibilities for the Node community.
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i hate how cds are being phased out (at least around here) its so stupid
like i get “oh now we have spotify” and shit but???
like, you buy a cd, no ads, nothing, you pay for the cd, and maybe a player. thats all?
no subscription needed. no ads. nothing.
why?? whats the point? i get it, playlists are easy and portable, but ? just because one works “better” in some peoples opinions?
honestly, the idea of not being able to listen to anything and i mean anything without having to either listen to ads or pay to have no ads is just fucking sad.
physical media will always be better in my opinion
#brought to you by the fact my father has a million cds#and his work truck (thats 2023 model mind you) has no cd player#it pisses me off so much#is that happening to cars too?#like i understand “oh but radio” but ? they also have cut ins which annoy me to death but yk i understand why. its always been like that#(i think) and thats fine. bur seriously? what about playlists? you cannot expect some 60 year old thats a chemical truck driver to know how#to use spotify or be bothered to#because (new ones) trucks have this BULLSHIT system that if it thinks your not “focused” on driving itll fucking beep (VERRY loudly)#so youre telling me. a 60 year old. truck driver. that gets essentially screamed at anytime he even reaches over to get a water. has time t#learn how playlists work. make playlists. then Still get screamed at for changing it. and again. ads#yea no fuck that#im not able to go with him but fuck#its not uncommon for him to spend 5~ hours if not more in his truck at any point in time.#and he isnt able to listen to music without ads?#bullshit i call fucking bullshit.#i can barely go 1 hour in a car alone with no music#and he has to go the whole fucking time or suffer while trying to find something remotely good on the radio#if you cant tell im salty abt this#BECAUSE#hes finally able to bring it home (look his boss favors him and EVERYONE knows it)#and theres no reason to even sit in it#its a day cab which is already boring as FUCK and now no music#god this is so long#j’s crying and listening to music
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even does know what plants are though. (as per doctor who canon, the way ships manage to keep oxygen on long voyages is via having literal forests in them. now, nothing to that extent, obviously, they weren’t that well-equipped or funded. but there’s definitely plants In There, probably relegated to a much more ordered existence, think the difference between a natural forest and one grown for logging.) at least they have that. they have seen plants. not often, but they have.
i don’t think they really understand plants beyond their functions (to eat, keep everyone breathing, etc.) whereas with natural beauties and animals and other such things that even has no experience with and can wonder over, they can’t really. do that with plants. the ability to admire a flower rather than immediately think of it in terms of resources lost and gained in its creation is a skill they have to learn.
but you know. at least they have seen them. that’s something. that’s slightly less depressing, right.
#even also would not know how to take care of plants. at most they know that plants require water. maybe.#their job was reconstituting the ship’s waste and recovering as much as they could and safely disposing of the rest#even doesn’t know to water plants. thank god the doctor doesn’t keep houseplants. they would die.#but i just think this would be an interesting contrast.#how easily even is taken in by things they’ve never seen before. and the few things they consider mundane. they have trouble looking at#with any emotion but Critically Thinking About How This Contributes To Us#the ever-present conflict of everything they learned to function as a part of a ship that was. not prepared. and responded to its lack of#preparedness by dehumanizing everyone on it and exploiting them until their death all for a future they couldn’t even be sure was there.#and the fact that they are delighted by the universe. they want to love it. they want to see it as beautiful. they want to escape.#and. what that means is that even thinks of flowers as wastes of space. long after they’ve gotten over a lot of their other ins#instincts about resource management and wasting it and such. they never really like flowers.#and that makes it kind of funny right? that it’s rose they have a crush on.#to them: rose is essential. so important to the doctor and so important - in their eyes - to the whole universe because of it.#idk where im going with this but its certainly a thing now#dw oc
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The reason "We (USamericans) should reduce our personal consumption of resources to save the planet!" won't change anything, is that there is no "we."
The average American does X amount of unnecessary shopping, but collapsing the wide range of wealth inequality into an average creates a vague call to action that sufficiently motivates 0 people.
Poor people feel guilty about buying stuff already. Even essential stuff. They have very little ability to adjust the amount they consume, and any adjustments that are possible would be almost negligible.
The moderately affluent and up vastly overestimate the impact of small adjustments to their lifestyle, and think of denying themselves any indulgence as extreme frugality. This is often the group that uses the "we" pronoun in the statement "We should consume less."
Most of the USA's carbon emissions come from heating and cooling and from cars. Since homelessness is treated as a crime, houses are not made sustainably or constructed smaller than a certain size, and it is virtually impossible to work or obtain basic needs without a car, there is a very solid and nearly impenetrable bottom to the scale of individual consumption.
So much consumption is near 100% impossible to opt out of, which means of course that the money that goes to it is never really yours, it just happens to pass through you on its way to its true destination.
This is obscured by the fact that the more privileged can ride a cushioned elevator below that bottom, play for as long as it takes for them to feel good about themselves, and take the elevator back up, and then write an article saying "See! I lived on 3 cents a day/lived in a 100sqft house/didn't use electricity for a week, and here's what I learned!"
Sure, you tried living a frugal life for a while. But you never doubted that the elevator would be there to take you back when you were tired of playing. You never felt the Fear. That's why you learned nothing.
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Asexual Non-Fiction
Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex by Angela Chen
An engaging exploration of what it means to be asexual in a world that's obsessed with sexual attraction, and what we can all learn about desire and identity by using an ace lens to see the world. Through interviews, cultural criticism, and memoir, ACE invites all readers to consider big-picture issues through the lens of asexuality, because every place that sexuality touches our world, asexuality does too.
The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality by Julie Sondra Decker
In The Invisible Orientation, Julie Sondra Decker outlines what asexuality is, counters misconceptions, provides resources, and puts asexual people's experiences in context as they move through a very sexualized world. It includes information for asexual people to help understand their orientation and what it means for their relationships, as well as tips and facts for those who want to understand their asexual friends and loved ones.
How to Be Ace: A Memoir of Growing Up Asexual by Rebecca Burgess
In this brave, hilarious and empowering graphic memoir, we follow Rebecca as they navigate a culture obsessed with sex—from being bullied at school and trying to fit in with friends, to forcing themself into relationships and experiencing anxiety and OCD—before coming to understand and embrace their asexual identity.
A Quick & Easy Guide to Asexuality by Molly Mulldoon and Will Hernandez
Writer Molly Muldoon and cartoonist Will Hernandez, both in the ace community, are here to shed light on society’s misconceptions of asexuality and what being ace is really like. This book is for anyone who wants to learn about asexuality, and for Ace people themselves, to validate their experiences. Asexuality is a real identity and it’s time the world recognizes it. Here’s to being invisible no more!
Asexualities: Feminist and Queer Perspectives edited by Karli June Cerankowski and Megan Milks
As the first book-length collection of critical essays ever produced on the topic of asexuality, this book serves as a foundational text in a growing field of study. It also aims to reshape the directions of feminist and queer studies, and to radically alter popular conceptions of sex and desire. Including units addressing theories of asexual orientation; the politics of asexuality; asexuality in media culture; masculinity and asexuality; health, disability, and medicalization; and asexual literary theory, Asexualities will be of interest to scholars and students in sexuality, gender, sociology, cultural studies, disability studies, and media culture.
Refusing Compulsory Sexuality: A Black Asexual Lens on Our Sex-Obsessed Culture by Sherronda J. Brown
In this exploration of what it means to be Black and asexual in America today, Sherronda J. Brown offers new perspectives on asexuality. She takes an incisive look at how anti-Blackness, white supremacy, patriarchy, heteronormativity, and capitalism enact harm against asexual people, contextualizing acephobia within a racial framework in the first book of its kind. A necessary and unapologetic reclamation, Refusing Compulsory Sexuality is smart, timely, and an essential read for asexuals, aromantics, queer readers, and anyone looking to better understand sexual politics in America.
I Am Ace: Advice on Living Your Best Asexual Life by Cody Daigle-Orians
Within these pages lie all the advice you need as a questioning ace teen. Tackling everything from what asexuality is, the asexual spectrum and tips on coming out, to intimacy, relationships, acephobia and finding joy, this guide will help you better understand your asexual identity alongside deeply relatable anecdotes drawn from Cody's personal experience. Whether you are ace, demi, gray-ace or not sure yet, this book will give you the courage and confidence to embrace your authentic self and live your best ace life.
Ace Voices: What it Means to Be Asexual, Aromantic, Demi or Grey-Ace by Eris Young
Drawing upon interviews with a wide range of people across the asexual spectrum, Eris Young is here to take you on an empowering, enriching journey through the rich multitudes of asexual life. With chapters spanning everything from dating, relationships and sex, to mental and emotional health, family, community and joy, the inspirational stories and personal experiences within these pages speak to aces living and loving in unique ways. Find support amongst the diverse narratives of aces sex-repulsed and sex-favourable, alongside voices exploring what it means to be black and ace, to be queer and ace, or ace and multi-partnered - and use it as a springboard for your own ace growth.
Asexual Erotics: Intimate Readings of Compulsory Sexuality by Ela Przybylo
Through a wide-ranging analysis of pivotal queer, feminist, and anti-racist movements; television and film; art and photography; and fiction, nonfiction, and theoretical texts, each chapter explores asexual erotics and demonstrates how asexuality has been vital to the formulation of intimate ways of knowing and being. Asexual Erotics assembles a compendium of asexual possibilities that speaks against the centralization of sex and sexuality, asking that we consider the ways in which compulsory sexuality is detrimental not only to asexual and nonsexual people but to all.
Ace Notes by Michele Kirichanskaya
As an ace or questioning person in an oh-so-allo world, you're probably in desperate need of a cheat sheet. Covering everything from coming out, explaining asexuality and understanding different types of attraction, to marriage, relationships, sex, consent, gatekeeping, religion, ace culture and more, this is the ultimate arsenal for whatever the allo world throws at you.
Ace and Aro Journeys: A Guide to Embracing Your Asexual or Aromantic Identity by The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project
Join the The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project (TAAAP) for a deep dive into the process of discovering and embracing your ace and aro identities. Empower yourself to explore the nuances of your identity, find and develop support networks, explore different kinds of partnership, come out to your communities and find real joy within. Combining a rigorous exploration of identity and sexuality models with hundreds of candid and poignant testimonials - this companion vouches for your personal truth, wherever you lie on the aspec spectrum.
Sounds Fake But Okay: An Asexual and Aromantic Perspective on Love, Relationships, Sex, and Pretty Much Anything Else by Sarah Costello and Kayla Kaszyca
Drawing on Sarah and Kayla's personal stories, and those of aspec friends all over the world, prepare to explore your microlabels, investigate different models of partnership, delve into the intersection of gender norms and compulsory sexuality and reconsider the meaning of sex - when allosexual attraction is out of the equation.
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Hey- I'm one of the presidents of our university's honor fraternity. And its great, don't get me wrong or anything. But we're essentially just a group of skinny white nerds and calling us a "fraternity" is a bit of a stretch. I was hoping to try and use your app to give some of the members a real "frat" experience, especially since its summer now. I thought I'd just test it on me and the other members of our frat's leadership, just to make sure its safe. But I'm having a hard time setting reversal parameters and I'm unable to stop this stupid countdown. Any help please?
You know, for a self proclaimed nerd, you really didn’t do a lot of research. I know that InstaJock is mysterious and not very well known, but what I mentioned in my previous posts should have been enough for you to figure out a few of the issues with your idea. Just to clarify though, let’s go down the list of issues
InstaJock can only be used on one person at a time: the person currently using the phone to set up a profile. The only person you’re about to turn into a Jock is yourself, though I imagine the rest of your frat leaders will get the app too, after you send it to them.
InstaJock is not ‘my app.’ I report on it, and I know a lot more about it than most people, but I didn’t make it. I’m not sure anyone knows who did. If you’re looking for inside information about the app, you’re out of luck.
Reversal Parameters. The app doesn’t have those.
Yes you read that last one correctly. One of the first things most people learn about InstaJock is that it’s irreversible. Sure you can change something about yourself after the fact using the settings, but you can never go back to being the nerd you were. I don’t know where you got your information about this app, but I think someone has been trying to trick you into turning yourself into a jock. I can almost prove it too. See, another basic rule of the app is that InstaJock is, well, instant. There is no flash or growth spurt on anything. One moment you’re a nerd, the next you’re a dumb muscular jock. There shouldn’t be a countdown. Not unless… someone added it to your phone for a specific reason.
Someone wants to watch you squirm, watch you panic as you realize there’s no hope and that you’re definitely going to turn into a dumb jock, and probably drag your entire frat along with you. It might be another person in your frat who thought the app was just a joke and never expected you to find a real version of it, or a jock who wanted to take you and your frat down a peg and turn you guys into proper frat bros. But whoever it is, they’ve got you good. I’m sorry but there isn’t any way out of this. If you’re lucky you might be able to alter the settings a bit, but I imagine whoever did this to you already thought of that. As soon as that countdown ends, you’ll be a jock.
I am really confused as to who did this to you though. For it to be one person, that person would have to be a jock who had access to InstaJock and could invite you, but also would have to be smart enough to plan this all out and close enough to you to gain access to your phone. That could only be a few people. Maybe one of the mysterious app developers knows you personally?
I guess it doesn’t really matter to you now. Hope you enjoy being a beer drinking, muscle flexing, popular and sexy frat bro. I hope the rest of your frat likes it too.
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RWBY and Trauma
So, i want to talk a little bit about RWBY. Specifically, with regards to its thematic storytelling. I think I made a post about this a few days ago but im gonna make a longer one here.
RWBY tackles a lot of themes in its storytelling. Death, grief, fear, trust, etc. to name a few.
One of the bigger themes is "keep moving forward", which was also Monty's motto. It is exemplified through the characters, both heroes and villains, and how they handle trauma and suffering.
The villains have pretty much all suffered. Salem, Cinder, Hazel, Mercury, Emerald, Roman, Neo, even Watts, all suffered. They experienced trauma, and hardship, and it shaped them.
The big difference between them and team RWBY is that they cannot move forward. Where team RWBY learn to grow and change. Salem couldn't accept loss, and grief, and instead turned those emotions to anger, same with Hazel, Adam, Neo, they all refused to move beyond their trauma. Yang put it pretty well in V8 - all this death and destruction because something bad happened to you once upon a time?
Trauma is inevitable. But the difference between the heroes and the villains is how their trauma impacts them going forward. And not just in a "the villains react negatively and the heroes don't" because Ruby reacted poorly, as did Blake, and Weiss in the early volumes. Qrow drinks to deal with it, and Ozpin let the betrayal he experienced define him.
The difference here is that the heroes try to grow and stop making their suffering everyone else's problem. You cannot use your trauma to justify lashing out at the world and other people. I think Kratos in God of War put it quite well - "Do not be sorry. Be better." You can't hurt people because you are traumatised, because all that does is traumatise everyone else. It isn't a justification for lashing out. Salem was traumatised, and she murdered so many people, and traumatised a bunch of other people, who will only continue that cycle.
It is worth noting that some of the antagonists do grow and change and become better. Ilia, Emerald, Hazel, and Neo are the big examples. They were all hurt by the world, and they turned to anger and violence. But Ilia is convinced by Blake that it isn't what she wants, and Blake is right. So Ilia turns away from that path. Hazel and Emerald both change and grow, and whilst Hazel gets the noble sacrifice, Emerald has to make amends for hurting people by being and doing better, and trying to make a positive impact on the world. And Neo had an entire arc culminating in her seeking revenge, and getting it, and realising that it was a hollow victory that left her with nothing but directionless grief and anger. When she had nothing to pursue, she was forced to confront the fact that she was just running from her actual feelings and lashing out. In the end, she chooses to go to the tree willingly, which is essentially willingly giving in to change and growth, because that's what the tree does.
The central conflict of the show is essentially that everyone has suffered, and experienced trauma. But it is the hero's ability and desire to grow beyond it and be better, so that they stop hurting the people around them, that sets them apart from the villains, who refuse to keep moving forward and instead just let their suffering infect everyone else, perpetuating an endless cycle of violence and conflict.
#rwby#very curious to rewatch v9#its the one im most eager to rewatch#but im currently on v8 in my rewatch#its a good show#highly recommend#btw if you are arguing in bad faith on this post i will block you because if i wanted to see a clown#id go to a circus
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Yandere Changelings w/ human!Darling
The Changelings x Reader
Yandere Headcanons
Author's note: Gotta love these big buggo babies
reformed Changelings < unreformed Changelings
The Changelings/Reader [Platonic+Romantic-ish?]
[Gender-neutral Darling|Female Darling|Male Darling]
Potential ⚠️TWs⚠️ :
The Reader is quite humble • Abduction • Jealousy between changelings • Stalking • Invasion of privacy • Co-dependency • Aggression • Use of adhesive/the green goo • Violence • Possessiveness • Overprotective behaviour • Predatory behaviour • Love feeding • Overfeeding/“Overdosing” on love • Heart failure • Corpses of changelings mentioned
Changelings have certainly never had a very positive reputation around Equestria. The species of bug-like creatures mainly known to have ruthless mannerisms that only acts on instinct. Especially when considering the changelings eat love and love alone to keep them from starving. As you can see... These creatures, too, need to feed. And so steal the love hidden within ponies and other living entities for themselves with brute force. And this tiny human here... has love, and a lot of it.
But despite being an aggressive species, they are also known to be rather curious towards creatures they've never seen or heard of before. Which is why being a human is really just a saving grace for you in this scenario. Cause instead of pouncing immediately purely from starving impulse, they know they'd need information to report back to the Queen first. And since this is the first human the changelings have ever met, their natural reaction to encountering a new species is to learn more about it instead of feeding off of it, atleast not before they got all the answers they'd be satisfied with. Considering you are the only source of love and affection around.
The first changelings that have noticed your presence may start seeing you as a tasty morsel. if love is like meat for them, then they're being deprived of it, and then the one creature comes along that's a walking talking buffet of love. They'd observe your actions and behaviours from a safe distance for a little while, taking note of aggression signs or being a potential threat to the hive. But in truth... you weren't. You were more of a lover than a fighter, which gave the changelings the signal to not waste any other opportunity to abduct you into the hive for some answers.
And that's... when something sparked.
Being calm and sedate in your position would usually cease a changelings’ natural instinct to hunt and would often cause in less aggression and forceful measurements. But even if they did try feeding from your love, that would be similar to essentially trying to suck from a dry well, because the transporting process from the human realm to Equestria drained you of many strong emotions to begin with, and it takes a lot more time for your entire alternation from universe to universe to take full effect. And the changelings wouldn't budge from their stubbornness until you reached out to one of them... Brushing a gentle hand over its malnourished frame.
The love that you'd contain would be a tad bit ‘different’ from normal love they'd consume, mainly due to the fact that they never had to actually take it with force. You gave it to them willingly, making the love inserted into them a lot stronger and effective than if they were to steal it. Which results in giving their bodies an intense emotional ‘shock’ as you basically feed them little by little... The shock would still feel good to them, like it would make them feel warm and light headed, but their heart would begin beating rapidly by the shot of immense adrenaline they just got.
The reason why changelings need love and affection in the first place was because they need it for their survival. The value feeds them. As they learn you're capable of feeling and giving love, they would want to keep you around permanently to feed. However, in extreme cases it might lead to a changeling becoming dependent upon one person's love. And their survival might be based on that person's love and affection. and what happens when that person's love and affection starts to falter? There is such a darker side to something so innocent as eating some consensual love.
Which could go either two ways...
Plan A being a bit more complicated. Since they ended up taking a ‘sample’ of you to basically extract the hormones and emotions of love, you had proven yourself to be more productive than all of the ponies they've held captive combined. Feeling more satisfied with the mere sip of love you've happily handed out to them than with any usual prey they had ripped the love from. But the Queen desires love too, because it is essential for their race. And because the hive is almost completely devoid of any love in the first place. You could become a sample for the Queen... Just keeping you there and farm you for love.
But there's also a considerable chance the changelings who captured you would scrap plan A and would instead focus on a plan B... Keep you a secret from Queen Chrysalis and prevent you from being cocooned at all costs, but only under the condition if you keep blindly feeding them with your lovey-dovey personality. Changelings tend to function with a very strict hive mentality... conclusions are set by the swarm's majority of drones’ standpoint. They all have a strong tendency to fall for group decision-making, but they're also quick to swap their beliefs if it seems like the right choice for the best of the colony. So it likely wouldn't even take long for the entire swarm to come to an agreement to keep you secured under high protection and warding.
Due to being a good source, you would give them more positive energy than any other creature who would falter in their fright after being captured... which would make you a rather popular target for the swarm of drones. To a point where the entire hive would start to view you as the "heart of the colony" of sorts. Because a changelings emotions are based on their diet. And the more love they receive, the more addicted and obsessed they'll become with it. So they would all be head over heels at some point, bordering on complete worship ...viewing you as an object of their affection and admiration. And getting even more physically violent to defend and protect you from what they consider a threat to their food source.
They might be feeding off of the love you give them and emotional positivity for now. But if they keep feeding and feeding, eventually they are probably going to want something else than just your emotions, which isn't good... But at the end of it all, they will want to protect you. But their methods might be a bit morally questionable. They have been looking for a more ‘sustaining’ source of love their entire lives. And from what we know... love only grows stronger.
So what happens when a creature becomes utterly emotionally dependant on someone?
What if... they begin to get obsessive?
Instead deciding to ensure no one else gets to have you?
Signs of attacks outside of the hive would become more apparent as time went on, a variety of breeds beginning to disappear aside with half dead creatures covered in adhesive emerging from their hideout as no entity even dares to get close to the shapeshifters. Some changelings would begin arguing with eachother over the delightful taste of your love. But knowing how naturally greedy and hostile they can get, these would convert to physical violence sooner or later, causing a bunch of internal conflict in the colony. A bunch of love starved changelings just riskily fighting over a single human.
It would get so bad, in fact, that there's possibly not even second you'll spend in the hive without a changeling being nearby, just ... watching you. With or without you knowing, there to strike and pull you back in at a moments notice if your demeanor gets too close to flight response. The changeling that you first bonded with would feel remorse about doing it, but the rest of them won't really care much as long as they can keep you in their grasp. Though you would still be allowed to travel closely outside of the hive, they'll keep their little eyes on you anyway...
You'd have this love that's a bit diluted, but even with just having a weaker type of love to feed off of, they'd have to feed for a longer time and drain their energy in order to get it. Which in terms causes in them taking more than they can physically handle. You aren't necessarily a dry well, but rather more of a dripping faucet while they are all dying of thirst. So they could still eat from your given love for a while, but if they try to go all out, there could be horrific consequences...
Because each of them are essentially trying to take enough to survive, their individual feeding sessions can become more aggressive. They don't want to kill you, nor do they understand how strong of a heart you have. So they don't see that they need to be gentle. Because in their eyes, you're considered weaker as a mortal. And your emotions, not being very strong, make their hearts race and they aren't feeding slowly and cautiously enough to keep the heart beating at its normal pace. You're basically a complete reverse card on them. To the point of them becoming so infatuated with you, that they literally forget what they are doing, and basically, accidentally kill themselves with a massive case of overdosing love.
The more of your love they take, the more they will like you. And the more they like you, the more they would try to suck it out. And the more they try to suck it out, the more it would turn into a "want" instead of something more natural. And then, that's when some would begin to die from overfeeding. The emotional shock and overdosing on love being much more overwhelming than the changeling's bodies are capable of handling. And of course, you wouldn't really understand why they were all suddenly lifelessly scattered around you...
It would be quite a challenge for many changelings to have the self control to prevent that fate. I doubt the majority of them would even understand the concept of death enough to avoid it even when their heart rate was going at unsafe speeds. The situation would honestly be safe for the changelings that have enough self-control to hold themselves back, but those who don't would become history real quick... Especially as changelings mainly seem to cocoon their prey. You may have more love to give when you're out in the open, but perhaps you even walking freely might just be enough to push many changelings over the edge.
Though this would also highly depend on the distinct personality of each changeling. Those who were more reasonable would try to just suckle in love. Then we have those who would become a bit feral and aggressive trying to tear the love out of you. Making it like a really twisted irony that they want love, but by trying to obtain love, in this way, they could essentially doom themselves. The ones who are more in control and more disciplined may survive. But either the greedier or younger, more immature changelings might get too excited and just want more and more. Which leads into them destroying their bodies via the very thing they wanted. The ones that do manage to control themselves will remain very interested in you however. But even if their fair sense of attachment and perhaps even bond towards you won't fade...
This is nothing more and nothing less than a parasitic relationship
#my little pony#my litte pony friendship is magic#my little pony x reader#mlp fim#mlp#mlp g4#mlp x reader#my little pony fim#the changelings#changelings x reader#mlp changeling#changeling x reader#yandere my little pony#yandere mlp#yandere mlp x reader#yandere changelings#yandere changeling x reader#the end of season 6 did them so dirty#especially when ep 17 from season 7 released#they crumbled to the ground by pharynx’ hissing#A HISS.#that ain't the fierce buggos with aggression problems that I remember and love </3
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Ever since watching The Wire for the first time, my brain has doggedly kept working away at the Especially the lies of it all, and specifically at how much the structure beneath the different stories Garak tells contributes to the overall meaning of what he’s trying to say. While the contradicting narratives of course expertly obscure the factual circumstances of his getting exiled, using them also allows him to tell aspects and facets of the emotional truth I don’t think he ever could have, if he’d simply told the actual story of what happened. (It’s very Varric-core of him honestly.)
The first story — the ‘oh, you think you know me?’ story — says I have done things that would sicken you if you knew any detail of it. It’s clearly meant to scare Bashir away so he’ll leave him to die shamefully in peace already lol. But it’s also one of his (probably much-needed lbr) little lessons to Julian that are so frequent in the beginning, given while Garak still has some hold on himself — “Don’t be so quick to forgive me if you don’t even know what I’ve done; what would you do if this really were the sum total of what I am?” (And Julian seems to surprise him by going ‘Well, exactly the same thing, because no matter who you are I am a doctor. But I sort of take your point.’)
The second story — the letting the orphans go story — says I have failed to smother my soul in its cradle when it was required of me, and I regret that more than anything I’ve done. To my ears this is the one most shot through with active self-loathing too, which is interesting. He’s officially lost the control he’s been clinging to and it’s about to get ugly. His TL;DR is ‘Sentiment is the greatest weakness of all’, even all the way back here. (Which is the one lesson Julian steadfastly refuses to learn, which I think in turn does some serious rearrangement of Garak’s soul over the course of the show haha. Get uno reversed into the process of loving and being loved without shame asshole.) This is also where he builds up to admitting to having any sort of need for companionship or closeness at all and — so much worse — that Julian’s role in his life actually has fulfilled some of that need, and he’s DRIPPING with defensive venom over it b/c well I get it Garak vulnerability is scary it can take a person like that.
(I also feel there’s something honest and forbidden in ‘Suddenly the whole exercise seemed utterly meaningless’. I suspect ‘actually… why the fuck are we even doing this???’ is not a welcome sentiment in an Obsidian Order water cooler environment, no matter what you’re saying it about lmao. The very first seeds of him deconstructing the things he’s been taught about Cardassia and his work might be hinted at here, though they of course take a looong time to come to any real fruition.)
The third story — the ‘Elim was my best friend’ story — says hey, remember that thing you said once, about how sometimes, you have to be loyal to yourself before you can be loyal to anything else? Well. guess what. I couldn’t even be that lmao. It also furthers that thread of being divided from yourself, split, that having ‘Elim’ as a separate person around in all versions of the story brings in. He’s in control of himself again, but he essentially hands his life and soul over to Julian to decide what should be done with them.
I’ve done horrible things and it finally caught up with me, I’m getting what I deserve → I let sentiment master me and the fact that I’m too weak to do what’s needed of me shames me more than the evil I’ve done → I fucked up. I betrayed myself and everything I held to, all for nothing, and I have no one to blame for it but myself. But it’s very nice that you’re here anyway, Doctor. (Wow. I didn’t realize quite how isolated and lonely that last one was before right now. The way Tain has shaped him really has just… locked him completely into himself, huh.) We can also see a movement through from a completely professional context in the first story, to an intensely interpersonal and internal context in the last one — even his fake stories spiral in towards intimacy, which I think is what he longs for here even if he can’t quite like. Touch that without the stories as a buffer yet, it’s clearly like touching a hot stove for him to interact with it too directly.
And you know what I find incredibly interesting the whole way through? Even on his deathbed, where he’s dying from the thing Tain had put in his head, he’s protecting Tain. He puts all the blame for where he is on himself (‘My future was limitless, until I threw it away’), even if he has to employ a strange twisty logic where he’s split himself into two to do it. Don’t get me wrong, Garak has done horrific things all on his own haha, but it’s notable that he almost isolates Tain from that. ‘Tain was the Obsidian Order. Not even the Central Command dared challenge him. And I was his right hand.’ Tain in Garak’s stories is this infallible implacable weirdly distant figure, even now. Indeed, as will make a lot of sense with the revelations further down the line, more than anything it seems the gaze of an abused child desperate for recognition looking up at an idealized (if not in any way nurturing) parent.‘He was retired at that point; he couldn't protect me’, Garak says, as if what he’d need protection from in the first place isn’t Tain himself lmao, as if Tain had no active part in any of this. He never lets blame touch Tain at all. At this stage he would rather consider himself a broken flawed tool than accept that the hands that have wrought and wielded him have ever had any fault in them. AND in the middle of it all, with plausible deniability, on death’s door and knocking meekly to be let in before he must finish the mortifying ordeal of being known and test the even more daunting possibility of being loved, Garak at the same time manages to drop the breadcrumb trail of clues to make it possible for Julian to find Tain if he so chooses and gets in the ‘sons of Tain’ thing too for future dramatic irony purposes. Truly he is the Michelangelo of lying. Every falsehood a multifaceted masterpiece. Elim ‘achieving a state of intertextuality in real life is possible if you work hard and believe in yourself’ Garak. I love him so much.
I think all of this is why “I forgive you. For whatever it is you did,” works so well, because it too works on a structural level. It’s such a deceptively multilayered response — it has the syntax of a joke, in a way, and it is kind of funny even under the circumstances, but delivered with such earnest warmth and fondness. It’s both recognition and acceptance (forgiveness!). It’s saying ‘I finally understand enough of what you’re trying to tell me beneath and through all that, in whatever way you’re capable of, I see you’ and ‘my answer hasn’t changed (bitch)’. The forgiveness Julian offers here is complete — on principle, and out of personal feeling and empathy (only one of which Garak deigns to respond to during the second story, where he calls it ‘smug Federation sympathy’, placing it more completely on the principle side than it probably is. ‘Dude you’re my friend please don’t just lie down and die in a completely avoidable way on me, who else is going to not only tolerate but actually gleefully enjoy me being annoying as fuck over lunch’ seems to be the subtext that’s a lot harder to acknowledge and invite in for both of them. And yet Tain seems perfectly clear on the fact that Julian is Garak’s friend, which, y’know. Must be fun living with the knowledge that Tain has eyes everywhere looming over you every day haha guess you’d just have to tune that out.)
Most of all — ’Don’t give up on me now, Doctor’... and he didn’t! He didn’t. Augh. Ow.
#garashir#elim garak#julian bashir#star trek ds9#ds9#star trek#ds9 meta#S2EP22 The Wire#alternate title: baby's first brush with unconditional love through unreliable narration lol#I'm not sure I got to say everything I want to in this/found the exact right words in places or hit all the nuances#but god help me I so desperately need this out of my brain to free up some disc space so go forth little meta haha be free#I'm sure I'll come back to you in time#meta#enabran tain#(derogatory)
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Okay but think about this, the cod boys' reaction to having a Barrack's Bunny with them.
(if you don't know, a Barrack's Bunny is usually a woman, but can also be a man, that sleeps around a lot with their colleagues)
Idk if you want to like do all of the fabfavorites, but I'ld be most interested in how König, Ghost and Keegan would react!!
While we're talking about König, I had a stroke of genius a few days back and decided that König to me looks like Lee Pace, so...yeah, I'm imagining Lee Pace as this man. Lee Pace is also my fc for Johnathan Sanderson but that less important rn also I'm assuming we want romance/spice here so:
COD Boys Reaction to Finding Out Reader is a Barrack's Bunny
Characters: Price, Ghost, Gaz, Soap, Roach, König, and Keegan
Warnings: Possessiveness, NSFW Implied, Minor NSFW, choking (light), mentions of STD's, reader is a barracks bunny (sleeps around essentially)
Price
Price sees you coming out of some new recruits room, hair mussed and clothes wrinkled
He's not an idiot, Price has been around, he's had people like you on teams that he's worked with before
Still, this is the first time he's actually felt tempted
Calls you into his office a week later, after he's done more research and watched you dissappear in and out of different bunks. He had to be sure before he could act.
Sits you down and tells you that he knows what you've been doing
You're in a panic, sure you've been enjoying yourself but its not worth losing your job over
Everything is made even worse to you by the fact that its Price speaking to you about it
Captain of the illustrious Taskforce 141, everyone knows him, everyone knows his skill
You, in particular, know how fucking attractive he is
So while Price is "scolding" you (literally just telling you the dangers of what you're doing) you're trying desperately to pretend you aren't losing your shit and horny as fuck.
Then, at the end, Price is tapping your papers together and tells you he wants you to stop sleeping around with other recruits
He tells you that he wants you to get tested weekly now, to make sure you don't have anything
You ask him in a meek voice why weekly, why weekly if you're supposed to stop?
He leans back in his seat, his eyes practically devouring you as he reminds you
"I said stop sleeping around with the other recruits"
Price gives a much better offer. If you want to fuck around, why not fuck around with his team rather than the typically less than stellar recruits you'd been sleeping with
It's really not much of a question for you
When you accept, you see just a hint of a smirk tug at his lips, not much but enough to have you going warm
If you're warm then, you're sure you'll combust when Price pushes his seat back just enough to motion to the floor in front of his chair, his legs spread
"Go on then, you can start with just your hands until we get everything else sorted."
He doesn't interact much with the new recruits outside of training, but he knows you
Ghost
Ghost learns about what you've been up to from Price
He's seen the way the other recruits flock to you and hang off of you, he knows several of them have crushes
He assumed, however, that you hadn't been giving any of them the time of day, so he's a little shocked to hear what you've actually been up to.
Maybe part of him is a little jealous, but the bigger part of him is excited.
If you're willing to fuck with recruits who barely know how to use their cock, surely you'd have no issue with him.
He waits for Price to talk to you and waits patiently for everything to go through before he makes his move
It's after training and he's just watched you the whole time, anticipation for whats coming
Ghost doesn't indulge often, but when you're so open and he's feeling more than a little desperate, its easier to wait for you outside of the locker room.
As soon as you step out he has you by the arm, pulling you somewhere quiet and secluded
He has you pressed against a wall, a thigh pressed up against you as he gets close.
He makes sure you know that Price has told him what you've been up to
He enjoys the embarrassment that flushes across your face, but doesn't let it last very long as he presses closer
Asks you if you've been satisfied with the recruits you've been fucking with. Asks you if they fuck you the way that you like.
He's right against you now, his entire body pressed against yours so all you can do is shake your head no, feeling flushed from head to toe
"Bad choice going for the recruits, if you're going to sleep around you can at least get something out of it. You want something out of it?"
Let's a hand land temptingly over your crotch as he waits for your response, his intentions are perfectly clear.
He waits for your permission before jumping you, but he certainly makes his point about those recruits
Its not hard for you to say you'll be aiming higher up from that point on
Gaz
Absolutely miffed when he finds out
He probably spends the most time around the recruits, so he definitely knows you
He never would have expected it from you
Never would have known if he hadn't overheard some recruit trying to brag about it
"You're not special, they're a bunny dude. They've had like half the people on our squad."
Has a whole moment™ because he knows he has to tell someone about this, like its part of his thing as a superior to you
But also 😏
Maybe he can handle it on his own
Bides his time, watching and waiting for the perfect opportunity to approach
Ends up finding it when he sees one of the recruits yoinking you out of the cafe for a very clear purpose
Hustles through a short cut to be able to cut you guys off
Acts like he has no idea what you guys were about to do
"Oh, there you are. I've been searching up and down for you. Think I can borrow them for a sec?"
You're more than a little confused when Gaz takes you back to his room rather than any meeting room
The lock of the door clicks behind you and the two of you are left alone
Gaz starts with the professional side of things
"I know what you've been doing."
You run cold and rush to explain yourself, but Gaz stops you with a hand raised
"Listen, this can't be good for you, and its against regulation, so I really do need you to stop."
You nod your head rapidly, prepared to literally fall to your knees in thanks for him not ratting you out. That is until he steps into your space
"However, if you're careful, maybe have one person take care of you, maybe it'll be alright."
Your eyes widen and a part of you runs hot as Gaz reached forward to tuck a finger under your chin, guiding you closer with just a light touch.
You're literally helpless against him, unable to do anything but follow as he brings you closer
"I'd be willing to volunteer, if you'd like"
You do end up liking ;)
Soap
Soap barely knows the recruits, he hardly pays attention to them
However he does know you
Soap's had his fair share of flings and his fair share of run ins with Barrack Bunnies before, he knows the type.
And he sees you chatting it up with the recruits and his brain clicks into place immediately
Maybe he doesn't believe at first, but later he sees you sneaking out of someone's room and he knows his instincts were right.
A part of him is really excited
Since joining the 141 he's held out on enjoying any of the more risqué things that people get up to
And he's been a little too busy to actually seek anything out even if he'd wanted to
So to have you show up and fall right into his lap? He plans to take full advantage
Soap knows the game, he knows how this all works. You don't talk about it directly
So he starts by fully introducing himself, giving you his name with a joke and a little bit of flirtation attached to let you know he's interested.
Then comes the talking as he slowly hints at what he wants, what he knows that you do
You pick up on it all pretty quick, after all this is part of what you do
Still, to say you're surprised would be an understatement
A member of the famous taskforce 141 wanting to use you? Sign you tf up
When one of you finally cracks and invites the other back to your room/bunk, its a literal flurry of movement
You're both pretty much ready for this so it makes sense that you're both on the exact same page
Course he takes good care of you and you're more than pleased. He's easily the best you've had
Later when you're laying in bed together Soap tells you:
"As your superior, I am required to tell you that you need to stop this by the way. However as me?? Well, I'll find you again soon."
Roach
Roach is the unlucky one who doesn't realize what you get up to until he happens to walk by the wrong room at the wrong time
He's heading to a meeting with the rest of the team, completely oblivious to any of the people he passes or conversations going on
That is until he turns a corner and passes a room where he can very clearly hear moans echoing from
Stops in place, absolutely shocked because hey that's a fucking broom closet
Sticks around just long enough to hear whoever you're with moan out your name
Then he's scampering off to his meeting, his face red and his mind only focused on what he's heard
Thats when he starts paying more attention and, after walking by yet another one of your rendezvous a few days later, he realizes exactly what's going on
He's a little uncomfortable to be honest
He found you one of the more likable recruits and had been helping you with your weapons tests
He'd taught you how to line up your shots quicker with a sniper and the fastest way to reload a pistol
He'd been rooting for you and you knew it
So a part of him felt uncomfortable because, really, if you needed someone to take care of you, why would you not come to him?
What was so great about all those recruits you were fucking? What was so great about hopping between people?
He probably wouldn't have been so odd about the whole thing if he was one of the people you were seeing
He's a bit distant the next time he helps you, not talking as much and hardly meeting your eyes.
He's touchy though, constantly reaching out to correct your form and brush his fingers over your skin in a way that leaves shivers down your spine
When your session is over, he stops you
"Listen, I'm not going to make a big deal out of this because I don't see whats wrong with it, but if you're going to be with a new guy every night, you need to at least find somewhere better than a broom closet."
You go bright red, stuttering out apologies and excuses about sharing the bunks with others, all while he watches you with soft eyes
"Well, I guess you could always use my room."
You stop stuttering and for a moment you and Roach just stare at each other.
He seems a bit unsure of himself, but after you don't rebuff him, he continues
"But I'm the only person you're allowed to bring back there. How's that sound?"
That sounded just perfect to you.
König
The thing about König is that he's very possessive
Its hard to keep things and have a constant in life when you're in the military, so when König finds something constant that he enjoys, he gets attached
You become a constant in his life after joining KorTac and falling under his command
König likes the people under his command, but he really really likes you
A part of him views you as his already, even when he hasn't quite worked up the courage to tell you yet
It frustrated him more then he could explain
All that confidence on the field, but when it came to something as simple as confessing his feelings and that anxiety from when he was younger would bubble back up
But what frustrated him more was coming to the realization that you'd been bouncing around the various KorTac members practically since you'd joined
Well, the various members minus him
He'd spotted you sneaking off with Conor or Roze one too many times and he wasn't stupid, he could figure out what was going on, even if it had taken him longer than he wanted to admit
He would have to rectify this issue
He calls you to his office, declaring it a matter of utmost importance, of course you believe him
Its easier for him when he can slip into his work mask, using the title of colonel to shield him from his usual anxiety.
"I know what you've been doing."
He calls you on it. Wastes no time in telling you that he knows what you've been up to.
You panic, assuming you were on the chopping block for breaking regulation. Apologies spill from your lips.
König listens to them as he stands up and rounds the desk, getting closer and closer to you with each step.
Finally he leans over you, silencing you with his towering presence
"You should be sorry. The only person you should be pleasuring is me."
You're taken aback completely, but you can't deny the heat that comes with the possession
König makes sure that you understand who it is you'll be taking care of from then on out, all while wiping the remnants of the other members of KorTac away from your skin with his own heated touch
Keegan
It's hard for Keegan to admit that he feels jealous
Usually he's calm and cool about things, always keeping a level head even with a gun pressed to his temple
He knows it and everyone else around him knows it
So its hard to admit when he is losing his cool, especially when he's losing his cool over you enjoying yourself
There are really no regulations anymore. The military is barely a military, held together by a string in a wasteland
So there isn't even anything wrong with what you're doing.
He can't tell you to stop, he'll just look like an ass
So instead he has to sit and watch as you cycle your way through half of the fucking platoon.
It eats him up, drives him crazy
He'd had Hesh make fun of him several times, mocking him for wanting to be one of the people you brought home
Hesh didn't get it, Keegan didn't want to be one of the people, he wanted to be the person!
Since finding out what you'd been up to, it had been hell, and he finally decided that it was time to confront you.
He corners you in one of the weapons tents, has you pressed against some ammo boxes as he asks you what you were doing the night before
You stutter through your answer, a little embarassed to admit to it, even if there was nothing wrong with what you'd done.
Keegan lets you stumble over yourself, enjoying the fool that you make before he just comes out and says it
He's not kind with it, instead he offers a more vulgar explanation and you gape at him, unsure of what to say or do
"No more of that, doll. I'm tired of it."
You go to protest, prepared to point out that he couldn't really stop you
Thats when you've got a leg between your thighs and a hand pressed gently to the base of your throat
"I want you all to myself. I'll take you better than any of those fucking rookies could even dream of."
He makes good on his promise
#you asked luke#john soap mactavish#simon ghost riley#captain john price#kyle gaz garrick#gary roach sanderson#könig#könig cod#könig mw2#keegan p russ#john soap mactavish x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#captain john price x reader#kyle gaz garrick x reader#gary roach sanderson x reader#könig x reader#keegan russ x reader#call of duty
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As someone who hasn't read the works of radical feminists like Simone de Beauvoir, could you explain what's wrong and what bothers you about biological essentialism? I'm curious about your opinion after reading your post on radfems (and I'd like a perspective that isn't so based on biological gender essentialism, which I honestly have a hard time moving away from because I don't understand other perspectives well). 👀
The problem with biological essentialism is that purports to answer the eternally unanswered question of nature vs nurture in a wholly one-dimensional way - ie, with biological sex as The Single Most Important Aspect Of Personhood, regardless of any other considerations - while simultaneously ignoring the fact that biological sex is not, in fact, a binary proposition. We've learned in recent decades, for instance, that intersex conditions are much more common and wide-ranging than previously thought, not because scientists have arbitrarily changed the definitions of what counts as an intersex condition, but because our understanding of hormones, chromosomes, karyotpying and other physical permutations has expanded sufficiently to merit the shift. So right away, the idea that humanity is composed of Biological Men and Biological Women with absolutely no ambiguities, overlap or middle ground simply isn't true.
Inevitably, though, if you mention this, people with a vested interest in biological essentialism become immediately defensive. They'll start saying things like, oh, but that's only a tiny minority of the population, they're outliers, they don't count, as though their argument doesn't derive its claim to authority from a presumed universality. To use a well-worn example, redheads are also a tiny minority of the population, but that doesn't mean we exclude them when talking about the range of natural human hair colours. But the fact is, even if humans lacked chromosomal diversity beyond XX/XY; even if there were no cases of cis men with internal ovaries or cis women with internal testes or people with ambiguous genitalia - and let's be clear: all of these things exist - the fact is, our individual hormones are in flux throughout our lives.
There are standard ranges for estrogen and testosterone in men and women (which, again, vary according to age and some other factors), but two cis men of the same age and background could still have completely different T-counts, for instance - meaning, even the supposed universal gender factor isn't universal at all. More, while our hormones certainly play a major role in our moods and cognition, so do a ton of other genetic and bodily factors that have nothing to do with the sex we're assigned at birth - and on top of that, there's nurture: the cultural contexts in which we're raised, plus our more individual experiences of living in the world.
One of the most common, everyday (and yet completely bullshit) permutations of biological essentialism comes when parents or would-be parents talk about their reasons for wanting a son or a daughter. Very often, there's a strong play to stereotypical assumptions about shared interests and personalities: I want a son to play football with me, for instance, or: I want a daughter to be my shopping buddy. But even within the most mainstream channels of cishet culture, it's understood that these hopes are not, in fact, grounded in any sort of biological certainty. The dad who wants a sporty son might be just as likely to end up with a bookworm, while the mother who wants a little princess might find herself with a tomboy.
We know this, and our stories know this! For the entirety of human history - for as long as we've been writing about ourselves - we have records of parental disappointment in the failure of this child or that to embody what's expected of them, gender-wise. More than that: if biological essentialism was real - if men were only and ever One Type Of Man, and women were only and ever One Type Of Woman, with recent progressive moments the sole anonymous blip in an otherwise uniform historical standard - then why is there so much disparity and disagreement throughout human history as to what those roles are? The general conception of women espoused in medieval France is thoroughly different to that espoused in pre-colonial Malawi, for instance, and yet we're meant to believe that there's some innate Gender Template guiding all human beings to behave in accordance with a set, immutable biological binary?
And that's before you factor in the broad and fascinating history of trans and nonbinary people throughout history - because despite what TERFs and conservative alarmists have to say on the matter, our records of trans people, and of societies in which various trans and nonbinary identities were widely understood (if not always accepted), are ancient. We know about trans priestesses from thousands of years before Christ; the Talmud has terms describing eight different genders, and those are just two examples. All over the world, all throughout history, different cultures have developed radically different concepts of femininity and masculinity, to say nothing of designations outside of, overlapping with or in between those categories - socially, legally, behaviourally, sexually - and yet we're meant to believe that biology is at all times nudging us towards a set, ideal gender template?
There's a lot more I could say, but ultimately, the point is this: people are different. While some aspects of our personhood are inevitably influenced by genetics, hormones, chromosomes and other biological factors, we're also creatures of culture and change and interpersonal experience. The idea that men and women are fundamentally different, even diametrically opposed, at a biological level - that the major separator in terms of our personalities and interests isn't culture, upbringing and personal taste, but what's between our legs - is just... so reductive, and so inaccurate.
We can absolutely have common experiences on the basis of a shared gender, but gender is not the only possible axis of commonality between two people, let alone the most salient one at all times, and the idea that we're all born on one side of an immutable biological equation that cannot possibly be transcended makes me feel insane. According to modern biological essentialism, intersex, trans and nonbinary people are either monstrous, mistakes or imaginary; all men are fundamentally predisposed to violence, all women are designed for motherhood, and we're meant to just hew to our designated places - which, conveniently, tend to echo a very specific form of Christian ideology, but which in any case manifestly fail to account for how variedly gender has been presented throughout history. It's nuts.
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sorry if you've talked about it already, but what is it that makes KOSA's idea of online safety wrong? I don't know much about the bill, what does it intend to do?
What do you think is a good way to protect kids from things like online predators or just seeing things that they shouldn't be seeing? (By which I mean sex and graphic violence, things which you'd need to be 16+ to see in a movie theater so I think it makes sense to not want pre-teens to see it)
From stopkosa.com:
Why is KOSA a bad bill?
KOSA uses two methods to “protect” kids, and both of them are awful.
First, KOSA would incentivize social media platforms to erase content that could be deemed “inappropriate” for minors. The problem is: there is no consensus on what is inappropriate for minors. All across the country we are seeing how lawmakers are attacking young people’s access to gender affirming healthcare, sex education, birth control, and abortion. Online communities and resources that queer and trans youth depend on as lifelines should not be subject to the whims of the most rightwing extremist powers and we shouldn’t give them another tool to harm marginalized communities.
Second, KOSA would ramp up the online surveillance of all internet users by expanding the use of age verification and parental monitoring tools. Not only are these tools needlessly invasive, they’re a massive safety risk for young people who could be trying to escape domestic violence and abuse.
I’ve heard there’s a new version of KOSA. What’s the deal?
The new version of KOSA makes some good changes: narrowing the ability of rightwing attorneys general to weaponize KOSA to target content they don’t like and limiting the problematic “duty of care. However, because the bill is still not content neutral, KOSA still invites the harms that civil rights advocates have warned about.
As LGBTQ and reproductive rights groups have said for months, the fundamental problem with KOSA is that its “duty of care” covers content specific aspects of content recommendation systems, and the new changes fail to address that. In fact, personalized recommendation systems are explicitly listed under the definition of a design feature covered by the duty of care in the new version. This means that a future Federal Trade Commission (FTC) could still use KOSA to pressure platforms into automated filtering of important, but controversial topics like LGBTQ issues and abortion, by claiming that algorithmically recommending such content “causes” mental health outcomes that are covered by the duty of care like anxiety and depression. Bans on inclusive books, abortion, and gender affirming healthcare have been passed on exactly that kind of rhetoric in many states recently. And we know that already existing content filtering systems impact content from marginalized creators exponentially more, resulting in discrimination and censorship.
It’s also important to remember that algorithmic recommendation includes, for example, showing a user a post from a friend that they follow, since most platforms do not show all users all posts, but curate them in some way. As long as KOSA’s duty of care isn’t content neutral, platforms will be likely to react the same way that they did to the broad liability imposed by SESTA/FOSTA: by engaging in aggressive filtering and suppression of important, and in some cases lifesaving, content.
Why it's bad:
The way it's written (even after being changed, which the website also goes over), it is still possible for this law to be used to restrict things like queer content, discussion of reproductive rights and resources, and sexual education.
It will restrict youth's ability to use the Internet independently, essentially cutting off life support to many vulnerable people who rely on the Internet to learn that they are queer, being abused, disabled, etc.
Better alternatives:
Stop relying on ageist ideas of purity and innocence. When we focus on protecting the "purity" of youth, we dehumanize them and it becomes more about soothing adult anxieties than actually improving the lives of children.
Making sure content (sexual, violent, etc.) is marked/tagged and made avoidable for anyone who doesn't want to engage with it.
Teach children why certain things may be upsetting and how best to avoid those things.
Teach children how to recognize grooming and abuse and empower them to stop it themselves.
Teach children how to recognize fear, discomfort, trauma, and how to cope with those experiences.
The Internet makes a great boogeyman. But the idea that it is uniquely corrupting the Pure Innocent Youth relies on the idea that all children are middle-class suburban White kids from otherwise happy homes. What about the children who see police brutality on their front lawns, against their family members? How are we protecting them from being traumatized? Or children who are seeing and experiencing physical and sexual violence in their own homes, by the parents who prevent them from realizing what's happening by restricting their Internet usage? How does strengthening parent's rights stop those kids from being groomed? Or the kids who grow up in evangelical Christian homes and are given graphic descriptions of the horrors of the Apocalypse and told if they ever question their parents, they'll be left behind?
Children live in the same world we do. There are children who are already intimately aware of violence and "adult" topics because of their lived experiences. Actually protecting children means being concerned about THEIR human rights, it means empowering them to save themselves, it means giving them the tools to understand their own feelings and traumas. KOSA is just another in a long line of attempts to "save the children!" by dehumanizing them and giving more power to the people most likely to abuse them. We need to stop trying to protect children's "innocence" and appreciate that children are already growing, changing people, learning to deal with discomfort and pain and the weight of the world the same as everyone else. What people often think keeps kids safe really just keeps them ignorant and quiet.
Another explanation as to why it's bad:
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Family business
I still need to watch the show but I wanted to do a Alfie Solomons x reader. I'm sure all the characters are ooc, so sorry about that.
The good thing about being part of the Shelby family was that its members were very united because blood ties were sacred.
The problem about being part of the Shelby family was the same thing.
Y/N often repeated it to herself, closing her eyes to keep her calm, while her brothers asked ridiculous or difficult things, considering that she didn't have the right to say no to them, just as they didn't have the right to tell her no either.
The fact that they didn't have the same mother didn't change anything. Their father may have been an asshole, but they were all Shelbys, united, hard-working, persevering, and here for each other.
They didn't often ask her things that would put her in danger. They were terribly protective of their little sisters, especially Arthur, but there were times when a feminine touch became essential to finalizing a deal or gaining someone's trust.
Almost no one knew that Y/N was a Shelby. Her mother had died when she was young and Polly had welcomed her into this strange world as soon as she learned that her idiot brother was her father. However, as soon as she was able to earn her own money, Y/N found a small place to live on her own, although she remained close to her family.
For Tommy, that made her perfect for a mission he'd had in mind for some time.
“I want you to become Alfie Solomons’ secretary.”
"Who ?" Y/N had asked, trying not to wince.
"It doesn't matter. He doesn't trust easily, but he's been having trouble managing his business for some time, too many unforeseen events, too many incompetent people. You are competent. Earn his trust, become indispensable, listen to his conversations, read his letters, and brings us all important information."
Y/N didn't know what important information was, even less so since she still didn't know who this Alfie Solomons was when she showed up at his office. Her brothers had decided that it was best for her not to know too much, not because she might be afraid, but because the man was very good at seeing through people. It wasn't very reassuring.
However, at first glance, Mr. Solomons did not seem that terrible. He showed a big smile when he saw Y/N, opening his arms and inviting her to come and sit down, offering her tea during their interview and listening attentively to everything she said. Despite his broken back, he insisted on walking her to the door, lowering her hand and declaring that he was delighted to have found his new secretary.
Two things quickly became quite clear after several weeks working with Alfie Solomons : he wasn't running a bakery at all, and he was perfectly charming.
Well, it happened that he shouted at certain employees, even hit them, and probably worse when there were no witnesses, but with Y/N, he was undoubtedly the most sweet and polite man. the sweetest in the world.
Even when she made mistakes, which didn't happen often, he would shrug his shoulders and say it was her fault, because he was asking a lot of her, before offering her a cup of tea and some biscuits.
Sometimes she would find flowers on her desk when she arrived in the morning.
“Slept well, love ?”
"Very well, Mr. Solomons, thank you. And you ?"
"Call me Alfie, love. And I haven't slept yet."
"Are you saying that so I don't wake you if I find you asleep again before a meeting, Mr. Solomons ?"
“I know you will do it no matter what, you cruel woman.”
When they didn't have too much work, they talked. Alfie Solomons had an opinion on everything, stories to tell, anecdotes or more or less strange questions on philosophical subjects as well as on perfectly futile or strange things. He often made her laugh, which seemed to please him.
On the contrary, he did not like it when another employee, client or business partner allowed themselves to be rude to his favorite secretary. It wasn't often, word had quickly spread about what Mr. Solomons did to those who misbehaved with Y/N.
For some, they were sleeping together. It didn't help that he often drove her home, even if it was only when it was very late, raining, or very cold.
Even though she promised them it wasn't true, her brothers were a little worried. They didn't like seeing Alfie hovering around their little sister like that, even if she brought them some interesting information thanks to her position.
It wasn't normal that she managed to have so much information, which worried them even more because Alfie Solomons really wasn't the type of man to take such a risk, so either he had discovered who she was and he was either giving Y/N wrong informationsn or he liked her so much he let her have everything.
The Shelby brothers didn't know which would be the worst. With all the information turning out to be true, they didn't know what to make of it.
Y/N didn't ask herself these kinds of questions, too busy with her work as a secretary, trying to keep her distance from her employer who was much too charming to be honest, and who was obviously not very appreciated by her family .
He sometimes asked her to marry him, but only as a joke, when she brought him a meal or when she forced him to put a pillow behind his back so that he wouldn't suffer the next day, or when She took care of his business perfectly.
Everything stopped after Arthur's beating.
The next day, Tommy called his sister to order her to leave. He was kind enough to apologize when he told her that she would probably have to move, but that she could always stay to Watery Lane with them while she found something, to make sure that Alfie wouldn't find her. Although he didn't see why he would look for her.
Solomons was disappointed to learn that his beloved secretary had to leave town for family reasons, but he seemed to understand, kissing her one last time on the hand and wishing her a good life.
“I guess it’s still a no for marriage ?”
"Mr. Solomons…"
"I know, I know, I'm just an old idiot. Take care, love. Shalom to your brothers and sisters."
Several months passed before this little sentence made sense to Y/N.
It hadn't shocked her, because the man talked too much for her to take in everything he said, it was only polite that he wished the best for his family, and she had been too busy not to show that their separation affected her.
Not seeming to see that she had become attached to the wandering Jew, Tommy did not warn her when it was decided to do business with him, against the Italians. He hadn't warned Arthur either, who wasn't happy to see Alfie again.
The meeting went well, from what Y/N understood. Alfie presented his "apologies" to Arthur, before agreeing to help him sort out their affairs with the Italians. He didn't ask for too much money, which surprised the brothers a little. He didn't hold them by the balls, it was the opportunity.
But no, he decided to be a gentleman, helping them in honor of old times. As he left, he only asked Tommy to greet his charming sister for him, winking.
The deal then no longer really mattered, because the Shelbys discovered something much more important. Solomons had discovered who he had hired as his secretary. He knew Y/N was one of them.
"… You're not serious. Thomas, you said it would be temporary."
"I know… I know ! Little sis, you have to understand that he is very dangerous. He is going to get revenge, he is going to hurt you and there is no way I am letting that happen."
“He won’t do anything to me.”
"It's business. He'll do it like he did to Arthur. You need to understand that you're not safe out there. Stay with us, stay home."
Y/N's worst nightmare was happening. Locked up with her family, without hope of independence or freedom. She should never have agreed to help Tom.
Unfortunately he seemed to be right, because she saw Ollie several times through the window, and other employees of the Bakery hanging around in the street. It was too risky to go out.
Then the flowers arrived. Deliveries of packages containing perfumes, books, tea. There was no need for him to sign them, but Alfie Solomons seemed to insist that the Shelbys understand that he knew full well where to find their sister.
Arthur wanted to kill him. John thought he needed to speak with this madman before it was too late. Tommy considered that just not bringing up the subject would make him calm down, too busy with other problems.
When the flu came, staying indoors protected no one. Ada brought the illness home and soon the most fragile members of the family were bedridden with fever.
A doctor came to examine them, to the surprise of the older brothers, who did not have enough money this month to pay for his services. He only said that they didn't need to worry about it, taking care of Finn, Ada, then Y/N, before going out without asking for a penny, leaving them with remedies and instructions.
The others' health improved quickly, but Y/N remained sick, shaking and sweating, sleeping for several hours before being awakened by nightmares, tired as if she hadn't slept for days.
One night, a hand on her damp forehead brought her out of her torpor. The hand remained still, only the thumb caressing her skin.
"You have to sleep, love. I brought tea, for your throat."
“Al… Alfie ?”
"Yes, love. Everything is fine, rest."
"It was you… who sent the doctor…"
"I wasn't going to let my favorite secretary die from a slight fever. Why isn't anyone at your bedside ? I don't like it, I'm going to have a word with your brothers."
Arthur and Tommy would undoubtedly have taken this as a threat, Solomons managing to enter their home and sneak up to their little sister's room without being seen, then being able to do her all the harm he wanted.
Y/N knew he wasn’t going to hurt her. It had been obvious for several weeks that he didn't intend to, with all these ridiculous gifts and letters, where he kept asking her if he wanted to marry her.
He was having fun, nothing more. He continued to tease her, while scaring the Shelbys.
"It's not very nice." Y/N whispered, trying to keep her eyes open.
“It’s too easy to annoy them, it’s not my fault.”
“I wasn’t talking about that.”
"Ah. You see, love, I don't know what to do about it anymore. I did everything to make you see that I was serious, I who never seem serious. I knew it would be difficult at first, because you thought I didn't know who you were. I knew before I hired you. Then you left, I thought I was going to die, but I told myself that now that you weren't working for me anymore , if I said that I knew, then it would be easier. What should I do ? Buy a horse ? A trailer ? There is a gypso rite that I don't know to ask for the hand of a woman ? I have to go and see Arthur and duel him ? I can do it, he doesn't scare me, love. I can go right now."
"No… Stay with me…" she begged him, holding out her hand, coughing again.
Unable to not get agitated when he was speaking, Alfie Solomons had stood up to show that he would go to her brother's room to beat his face, but he immediately sat down next to Y/N, I took her hand which he kissed with all the tenderness he was capable of.
“Stay with me…” she repeated miserably.
"Yes, love, I'm here. I'm not going anywhere, I'm here."
And he was still there when she opened her eyes the next morning, holding her hand and smiling as her fever seemed to be going down.
The moment was slightly ruined by Finn, who wanted to see if she was better and who screamed when he saw Solomons. Alfie yelled louder, even if it was to order the bellowing to stop because Y/N needed to rest.
This of course alerted the entire Shelby family, who ran into the room.
At first, Alfie refused to leave. He promised he would stay, so he would stay.
Then, seeing Y/N's pleading look who didn't want anyone to get hurt, he sighed as he agreed to follow the brothers into the kitchen, for a discussion, but only if he was allowed to come back to see her to say goodbye to her afterwards.
"If I didn't kill you first…"
"Oh, Arhur. Shalom ! Glad to see you haven't lost your humor !"
Ada stayed with her sister, helping her to drink, rubbing water on her forehead, and not being able to stop herself from asking her what had happened. Y/N reassuring her, explaining that Alfie had sent the doctor, that he wasn't dangerous, not at all.
Unlike the others, Ada did not take care of their brothers' less than legal affairs. She understood that this Solomons was not a good person, but neither of them were, and he seemed very attached to Y/N.
"And you ? What do you think of him ?"
"He's a fool."
"I see. You like him. Do you think Tommy would be alright with you dating ?"
"I'm afraid Alfie doesn't care about Thomas' approval." Y/N sighed, trying to hear if any screams were coming from downstairs. "He is very stubborn."
"I thought I noticed, with all these gifts. If he asks you to marry me, I want to be a bridesmaid."
“He’s asked me before, several times.”
“Damn, Y/N, Arthur is going to have a heart attack.”
Fortunately, the eldest did not have a heart attack, but he initially refused to believe Solomons' sincere feelings. The others were skeptical too. As she predicted, it didn't matter to Alfie, who only cared about her opinion.
He also pointed out that only Y/N had the right to order him to leave, by telling him that she never wanted to see him again. One word from her, and he wouldn't bother them anymore. But a yes, and he would be the happiest man in the world.
“With a beautiful family of fucking gypsos, but the happiest all the same.”
“She will never say yes to you !” John replied.
"Fucking hell, still speaking for her. Let's ask her. But not now, she still needs to recover. Leave her alone."
The brothers did not obey, waiting until the wandering Jew had kissed Y/N's hand and finally left to question her in turn, despite Ada's protests.
Only Tommy remained near the bedroom door, watching his sister in her bed. When their eyes met, he seemed to ask her a silent question, and she felt tears forming, unable to hide her answer.
He nodded, before whistling to tell everyone to get out. He said nothing, only smiling tenderly as he closed the door, leaving her alone with his blessing.
When Alfie Solomons would be back, with a white horse, new flowers and his proposal, she could say yes to him if she wanted, without fear of war. Because even though business was important, family was more important, and if Y/N was happy with him, then no one could say anything against that.
Her future husband only had to remember that if he hurt one of them, her the first, he would pay for it.
#peaky blinders#alfie solomons#alfie solomons x reader#alfie solomons imagine#alfie solomons fanfiction
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Why don't you take Spiro anymore? (You mentioned this in a recent post)
My T is sufficiently suppressed without it. Estrogen and Testosterone inhibit each other through indirect pathways- both signal the hypothalamus and pituitary, which in turn signal the testes/ovaries to produce more or less of their hormone. Unfortunately, T is a more potent suppressor of E than vice versa, so a blocker is needed to drop T levels at first (usually), which then lets E get high. Once E is high enough, then it can suppress T production on its own. For me specifically, I've never had a problem suppressing T, especially later into HRT when my E was getting somewhat higher. Even after quitting spiro, my T has never gotten above 20 ng/dL, and is mostly around 15 ng/dL, which is on the low side of normal even for cis women. AA in general are theoretically unnecessary once E is high enough to suppress T on their own, but this varies strongly dependent on the individual hormone metabolism from person to person. Fun fact, this is also why masculinizing hormone therapy is way simpler than feminizing hormone therapy- T is potent enough to inhibit E right off the bat without extra help.
Personal consideration to add here: I'm quickly learning that I'm a rapid metabolizer, along with about 20-30% of the human population. Essentially this means that most medication has shorter effect periods on me, and I believe it also has had an effect on how effectively my T got suppressed. My T levels were low almost immediately when I started HRT, and I started with spiro. But, the price I had to pay is that its taken forever for my E to go up. With that in mind, I realized that for me specifically, I didn't have to worry about my T going back up if my E wasn't high enough yet.
The above are about why I felt spiro was unnecessary, but why not take it just in case? Simple- side effects. I was having very noticeable diuretic side effects to the point where it interfered with my usual routines, so I tried to quit as soon as I could. Once I quit, a brain fog that I didn't even notice was there, lifted. I was having a lot of issues that I now realize were due to low sodium- my energetics were fucked, my vision was getting hazy when I stood up, and my heart pounded in situations it didn't need to. When I quit spiro, these stopped almost immediately, and I realized that these were side effects that I hadn't even registered as side effects.
These were considerations I made based on my own personal situation, but hopefully it helps. I haven't been on an AA since February or so. I actually just got a levels test back (spreadsheet update pending) and it confirms that my T has been within cis female ranges since early October, and on the low side of cis female ranges since early November.
In my personal opinion, AAs should be used more conservatively than it currently is, but are still necessary for HRT. My ideal HRT based on papers I've seen, personal experience, and conversations with my provider is essentially: brief period of E monotherapy-> E+AA until T is suppressed and E levels are high -> E monotherapy -> additional considerations (like prog). This is not coming from a medical perspective, though, just an anecdotal one.
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Maybe think about why you care so much about calling gerard way a woman to the extent that you equate it as the only correct way to engage with their work, as if art as well as support for the trans community can’t have value by itself, as if that isn’t the point, not their literal personal internal experience of gender that’s no one’s business, the same way trying to decide if anyone is trans is not your business if that person doesn’t want to tell you or talk about it with you, because it’s gender essentialist, and why it’s so baffling to you that a celebrity in general but especially gerard way might want to avoid labels or this specific type of intrusive categorization , as they have explicitly stated as well as created music that is about the same thing. And shouldnt we live in a world where someone can present gnc, and talk about experiences with gender and with femininity in honest ways, without people not just obsessing over whether that means they’re “really a woman” but outright deciding, and acting like they are. That’s a narrow fucking definition of womanhood. And shouldn't we value that authenticity from people who don’t want to choose a label as much as we do from people who identify in ways they do choose to label, (labels or the lack of btw have never been individual terms but tools for relating or not relating ourselves to the world in specific ways,) Isn’t that a better more open and beautiful mode of creating relationships to each other? Why does gerard need to be a woman to you? Why are you so obsessed with this? Why is transness and queerness and gender nonconformity itself, to you, some kind of item, an object or artifact for distribution upon others — and it is not in fact “creating cisnormativity” to accept the way a person wants to relate their identity to an audience. There are lots of trans women and transfeminine people who are doing everything gerard way is doing for transness and much more. If you want to call someone a woman go call a woman a woman. If you want to celebrate trans joy go celebrate trans joy. Please by all means do I will celebrate with you I am celebrating with you and I am doing it while listening to my chemical romance. So what’s the point in acting like this. I really don't get it. But it concerns me because this isn't the only time I've witnessed this kind of attitude and although its well-intentioned and "playful" its ultimately weird, ultimately harmful. So honestly, if this really feels "low-stakes" to you it might be because you've never dealt with the kinds of situations where the stakes exist, or considered the perspective of someone who has a different relationship to the stakes of your argument than you do.
Because not to be dramatic, but these stakes are the same stakes relevant to the literal record numbers of legislation currently being passed in the US using bioessentialism and gender essentialism to install systems of state-controlled gender-enforcing and forced gendering of trans and non-trans gnc children in schools and in healthcare. What you're doing is, if on a small scale, still contributing to the same conceptualization of gender as these laws, and as the people who passed them, even if you're well intentioned and hate the laws, even if your beliefs are reversed, the framework is the same, and that framework is going to empower the dominant culture, not yours. That's how power works. Which is why it's stupid. It's literally just stupid. And it hurts trans people who have had experiences in the real world where people are just as intrusive as you are being about trying to interpret their gender, and you’re no different for trying to clock people. If you don't know the stakes of your words, you should learn them before you use those words. Just because you're in a bubble of people who agree with you and think this is just about being either "right" or "wrong" about gerard way's gender and wanting to be "right" doesn't dismiss you from the meaning of the actual words you are saying and the ideologies informing your beliefs, whether or not you're aware of them, because the rest of us aren't trying to be right, we're not living in a this-or-that world in the first place. Personally I don't know them. I've appreciated & engaged with what they have said about their experiences with gender as well as their art while also respecting their statements about not liking labels, and treated their silence on their own identity as intentional, because I like knowing what words, and the absences of words, mean
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