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remembertheplunge · 6 months

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Swimming through the shark's teeth

September 7, 1989

Big blow up in court today. Again in judge Barkat’s court. I was a rude bitch.

But, the judge’s behavior in combination with the Da’s was outrageous.

So, I said and did what I needed to.

Then, I was fearful of being held in contempt of court.

Now I’m not—yea—I am.

But, I don’t regret what I did or said.

Every criminal defense attorney must be prepared to be fined or jailed.

We swim through the shark’s teeth daily.

Eventually, we will probably be swallowed.

#9/7/1989 #journaling #writing #public defender #contempt of court #job frustration

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frostedpuffs · 1 year

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does anyone else hate that work takes up like 90% of your life and you literally are always working and have to form plans and important things and even seeing friends or eating meals around work. it's always just work. im spending my life just being At Work. i don't have time for hobbies or for seeing friends bc it’s always Work. like two days off a week isn't even enough because my days off aren't consecutive so i just spend those days exhausted or doing errands or house chores. there is not enough Time. all the time goes to Work. WHY IS LIFE THIS WAY. humans were not meant for this

#literally so frustrating how im always at this damn job LMAO #working full time is a joke. you spend most of your life at work just to not even be able to make enough money to live #bullshiiiiiityee #text post

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moncuries · 7 months

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matters of state

#of note: how hard is it tot ell that this pond and turtleduck situation was borne out of frustration w the pose #not hard at all #furthermore: zuko with ursa style hair #who looks more in love u decide #zukka #sokka #zuko #atla #my art #fanart #passing bills such as: ur sooo good at ur job sokka hahaha want to ki #i gave both of them tattoos but then csp crashed #sorry

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inkskinned · 11 months

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at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

#every time someones like ''AI will replace u" im like. u will have to fucking KILL ME #there is no replacement here bc i am not filling a position. i am just writing #and the writing is what i need to be doing #writeblr #this probably doesn't make sense bc its sooo frustrating i rarely speak it the way i want to #edited for the typo wrote it and then was late to a meeting lol #i love u people who mention my typos genuinely bc i don't always catch them!!!! :) it is doing me a genuine favor!!!#my friend says i should tell you ''thank you beta editors'' but i don't know what that means #i made her promise it isn't a wolf fanfiction thing. so if it IS a wolf thing she is DEAD to me (just kidding i love her)#hey PS PS PS ??? if ur reading this thinking what it's saying is ''i am financially capable of losing this'' ur reading it wrong #i write for free. i always have. i have worked 5-7 jobs at once to make ends meet.#i did not grow up with access or money. i did not grow up with connections or like some kind of excuse #i grew up and worked my fucking ASS OFF. and i STILL!!! wrote!!! on the side!!! because i didn't know how not to!!!#i do not write for money!!!! i write because i fuckken NEED TO #i could be in the fucking desert i could be in the fuckken tundra i could be in total darkness #and i would still be writing pretentious angsty poetry about it #im not in any way saying it's a good thing. i'm not in any way implying that they're NOT tryna kill us #i'm saying. you could take away our jobs and we could go hungry and we could suffer #and from that suffering (if i know us) we'd still fuckin make art.#i would LOVE to be able to make money doing this! i never have been able to. but i don't NEED to. i will find a way to make my life work #even if it means being miserable #but i will not give up this thing. for the whole world.

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the-rainbow-of-doom · 6 months

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(This post was sponsored by a 1+ hour commute)

#I'm so frustrated how little time and energy i have after a day is done #i didn't win the fight against depression to have lofe ruined by THAT now #lacking time and energy to go on job hunt.. it's all very small steps only #a part time job would be marvellous but what flat can be paid with that #maybe also my anxiety is stopping me from getting a new job. what if i get fired. what if it's horrible there. ahh.. i need more courage #mine capitalism #anti-capitalism #work

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freckleslikestars · 8 months

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Fred, you had a part people loved. I mean, my TV Guide interview was six paragraphs about my BOOBS and how they fit into my suit. No one bothered to ask me what I do on the show.

Sigourney Weaver as Gwen DeMarco in Galaxy Quest (1999)

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becca-e-barnes · 11 months

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all i can think about is bucky literally BEGGING to eat your pussy. just on his knees, calling himself a needy slut, just looking up at you with puppy dog eyes while he just begs for your pussy on his mouth. ugh.

Men who are this into eating pussy have a special place reserved for them in Heaven. Hearing someone beg to go down on you is life changing when they know what they're doing 🙈

But you're so right, Bucky would be so willing to degrade himself like that just to be allowed to go down on you. He'd be on his knees, trying to ignore how full his balls feel, begging for you.

"P-please." His voice is so quiet you almost start to question if he said it intentionally. "I need to taste you. I can't think about anything else."

His cock twitches despite how heavy it looks, flushed and angry against the pale skin of his thighs.

"Really?" You tease, tilting his chin up with two fingers so he's looking at your face, rather than your body. "Tell me exactly what you're thinking. Describe it to me"

He doesn't miss a beat. "I'm thinking about how soft you are, how warm and silky your cunt feels under my tongue. I'm thinking about burying my tongue as deep inside you as I can reach and still wishing I could get deeper. I want to feel how wet you are but more than anything, I want to taste how wet you are. I want to dream about it for the rest of the week. Every time I stroke my cock I want to be able to remember how you taste."

Precum drips from his tip and you're not sure you can deny him much longer. Not when he's making it sound so appealing.

"Do you even hear yourself?" You do your very best to act like you don't love the sound of every word that has just come out of his mouth.

"I do. I sound like a shameless, filthy, desperate slut. The type of slut who wants to kiss and lick and worship your sweet pussy until you're so sensitive you have to force me to stop." His hand wanders between his own legs, tugging his stiff length to the mere thought.

He's not above begging and you know that. He'll draw this out as long as he needs to until he gets his way but there's very little sense in that when you want this just as much as he does.

"Lie on the bed." You give him time to make his way over before following, lining yourself up just above his face.

You take a second to smooth his hair, enjoying the feeling of his freshly shaved face against the sensitive insides of your thighs.

He's looking up at you, your eyes meeting his. "Thank you." The relief in his voice is clear right before he grasps your hips and pulls you down onto his mouth.

Fuck, he's incredible. This is the mouth you dream about when you're alone. His tongue massages your clit, stroking back and forth before dipping into your fluttering entrance. You swear he must feel what he's doing to you. You feel your cunt clenching and rippling, your muscles contracting in response to the pleasure and for a second you wonder if he can tell.

He's hungry for this; he has been for hours. He's moaning and slurping obscenely, his tongue buried in your cunt. You don't even need to look over your shoulder to know that he's alternating between fucking his own fist and gripping the base of his shaft tight enough to stop him from spilling his release all over himself too soon.

It's very hard to tell which of you enjoys this more.

#asks answered <3 #becca writes spice #anon #needy!bucky #bucky barnes x reader smut #sub!bucky #bucky barnes smut #subby!bucky #this should technically belong to the shs series #but it fit this prompt too well so I'm using it here #I make the rules 😇#but that 'thank you' nearly killed me #I've noticed this week that my beige flag is that I get so frustrated when people make assumptions about my capacity #I hate when people say stuff like 'how's the new job? you must be really stressed'#or worse 'things must be getting on top of you'#like ???#why would you assume I can't handle what I put on my own plate?#I know people mean well but it really bothers me

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wis-art · 8 months

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Not a big fan of capitalism

#i do not want to charge people to see my art #i have a job on top of doing this little art blog #every time i show this little project of mine people tell me i better find a way to monetize it to make money off of this #its just very frustrating to constantly have to explain that i want people to just see and cherish my drawings #i dont want to be reliant on making art to make my money i think that'd not work with what im going for #and it would turn art into a deeply frustrating experience i try to constantly optimize to get the most amount of money from #rendering experiments and trying out new artstyles something that could legit put me out of eating food 👍#but really #the job is not good for me i am always do exhausted #it really takes so much effort to draw sometimes

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aro-bird · 3 months

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Okay, for aro awareness week, I need you all to start recognizing that:

NOT EVERYONE IN THE ARO COMMUNITY IS FROM THE UNITED STATES OR EUROPE.

Please, when we're having discussions about aphobia, allonormativity amatonormativity, and other issues for the love of god STOP PRETENDING THAT WE DON'T EXIST AND LISTEN TO US!

We aren't just your token aros that exist in the other side of the world just for you to prove that we are everywhere or whatever point you're trying to make, we are living, breathing human beings and members of the aro community and we deserve respect and to be remembered not as a point in your discourse but as equals.

I am sick and tired of people just assuming that everyone in the community is either from the United States or Europe and only centering those voices in the discussion. We exist too.

#mayaposts #aro #aromatic #aro awareness week #aromantic awareness week #aro awareness week 2024 #aroallo #aroace #arospec #filipino aro #asian aro #poc aro #sorry this came about after someone replied to me saying that not everyone can afford necessities with one income and that rent is too #expensive these days with ''just move to less expensive cities like amsterdam or london and get a full time job'' and it PISSED ME OFF #mind you it was a discussion on why aroaces (who may not have partners or roommates) struggle in today's economy #the other person was not only dismissive of the op who was explaining the frustrations of needing to work multiple jobs to stay afloat #but also trying to just dismiss the struggles of single income people (in this case non-partnering aroaces)#and the implication that we should just ''move out of london and amsterdam and get a full time job'' to be able to afford rent #is such a privileged european/american take #sorry im ranting now lol im just peeved off #i dont even know if the other person was aroace at all tbh but whatever

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tenvishund · 4 months

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F I S S I O N - Why the hell do you hurt yourself for this?

#wake up babe new tenvishund art just dropped #very very rusty but inspired by a recent album and general life experiences/interraction #im coming to the end of my degree and trying to find A Real Proper Grown Up Job #and the industry I am in can be really sneaky - you think you've found something good but if you speak to the right people #then the truth comes out #which is frustrating #but here i am alive and well and probably doing better than i ever have been before #even if sometimes i do want to tear my guts out and die like a dog #such is life i guess all about balance #i also wanted to colour the guts red but i cant work this new fancy gimp system so i gave up #enjoy!! thank you for viewing!

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witchspeka · 1 year

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When Ritsu grows up he'll exclusively wear trenchcoats and one day he'll be walking down the street and see Reigen and they'll be wearing the same coat and it'll be the worst day of his life

#this post was inspired by the fact that like. lets be real here Ritsu would wear long coats that billow in the wind hes dramatic like that #and in the alien arc Reigens wearing That One Trenchcoat which is the singular article of clothing he owns thats decent #and i wanna spread my agenda that ritsu and reigen can be lowkey similar and i think if ritsu ever realised it he'd explode #kinda the same vibe as that one hc ive seen here and there with ritsu growing frustrated with his boring office job and doin smth impulsive #just how reigen ended up creating SnS #like. yeah. i get yall.#this is in the same vein. i want ritsu to grow up and start understanding reigen a bit more and hate every second of it #mp100 #mob psycho 100 #kageyama ritsu #arataka reigen #cine te a intrebat

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squeakadeeks · 6 months

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"In this world, I'm known as...the Winter King" 🌨❄️🌬

This cosplay was so so close to never seeing the light of day, as this was the aforementioned project I rage quit to procrastinate with Nekomancer on haha. I really adored the fionna and cake special (and adventure time in general) and wanted to cosplay from it for eons...although I will admit this project was intended to be "generic blue and silver winter regal outfit for a variety of characters" and it was a toss up on whether or not the first run was going to go to the Winter King/Simon or Jack Frost...but I couldn't find my jack frost wig so here we are!

This was my first time working a lot with velvet and low key....I loved it and would love to use it more.

#my cosplay #adventure time #fionna and cake #simon petrikov #LISTEN listen i try not to be negative #i know theres no reason to be your own hater #but this project has been a whoumph from day one #making it was frustrating and the end product feels disappointing #kind of a bummer end to my cosplay year BUT #all the more reason and motivation for me to focus on non-cosplay things for awhile #since im pretty sure the reason this costume fizzled is i just didnt put in the extra care and attention it needed #which is just...not really possible when youre making a new costume every single month on top of a demanding job #ALSO IM SOWWY NO GLASSES MY NOSE WAS WAY TOO TALL FOR THE TINY ONES I HAD originally for jamie heinemann if you believe it

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drac-kool-aid · 9 months

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Seward's bone deep desire to run away from the asylum is not exactly surprising. There have been a lot of really good meta posts about how the return of Van Helsing into his life is the turning point where we see the caring and good side of him and how we can interpret his life as a student in Amersterdam as one of freedom and happiness. How he is part of the tragedy of manners, how strict social expectations allow Dracula to persist, and how they only exacerbate the unhappiness of the characters.

And I think the tragedy of Seward is that, really, he should not be the head of an asylum. It's a job that brings him no joy, and he's BAD at it. We can all recognize that if your first reaction to going back to work is "What if I just leave it all." That isn't a healthy work environment.

Now, in the modern day, the ability to pick and choose a work environment, even to leave one that is damaging your mental health, is a privilege. (IT SHOULDNT BE, but it is). And, although it is definitely reaching crisis levels in modern times, major changes in your career have almost always been difficult (unless you are really rich, or a particular brand of academic in the 17th-18th century, or both).

Seward can't just leave and become a surgeon. To give up the lofty position of "Head of an Asylum" would be unthinkable in the 1890s, especially for a reason like "Being here is basically turning me into the Joker." Like, how would Seward explain that in polite society? Would they accept that reasoning? Would they create salacious gossip if they didn't? Can Seward leave his position without losing a great amount of social capital?

Probably not.

His rise to head of an asylum, as many have pointed out, was meteoric, to say the least. It has afforded him status and respect and also left him deeply, deeply fucked up. And he can't leave!

I think his desperate attempts to quantify Renfield's behaviors into a new mental illness are telling in this regard. Maybe he is too used to having to meet some sort of expectation, and now he thinks this is the logical next step (It's NOT, but I digress). The feeling of having to keep performing above expectations, grasping at straws to do so, and subsequently burning oneself out (as well as others around you) and engaging in unethical practices? Idk. It sounds like something that would happen today. (tbh there are probably a ton of Sewards out there today, as there are still systemic problems within the mental health system that allow for the dehumanizing and abuse of patients).

It doesn't excuse his behavior. Nothing he does to Renfield is excusable, but I think it does explain some of the *why*. He isn't just cruel for cruelty's sake.

So, tldr I guess: I think reading Seward as someone who got stuck on a career path that he realized was unfufilling and that he ends up hating. Social conventions restrict him from just quitting without and a (socially acceptable) good reason to do so, and a lifetime of being regarded as one of the smartest people in the room means he can not allow himself to fail. Unfortunately, this also means he can not admit when his actions or his ideas are wrong when it comes to his job.

(But he can show that uncertainty FOR Lucy, and TO Arthur and Van Helsing, which speaks his trust and love for them)

#dracula daily #jack seward #re: dracula #i think im rambling #but this kind of hit me #Jack's trapped in the asylum too in a way #only difference is his place of power allows him to take out that frustration on others #and i think it speaks VOLUMES that one of Jack's first entries was about how he regretted exacerbating Renfield just to study him #and as the sleepless nights and days filled of performing a job that he hates (and cannot bring himself to admit he hates)#as well as the depression from rejection #he stops feeling guilty

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kk1smet · 2 months

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Politician!Harry hates Mondays

#and his job #exercise restraint in dealing with him #a quick sketch to channel my frustrations because ugh monday again #kismet draws #harry james potter #my art #artists on tumblr #I have some april fool’s wips but not sure when i’ll finish them hah

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codgod · 10 months

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i feel like i see ppl mischaracterise mariana a lot too but then i also don’t feel like i know his character well enough to articulate in what way lol

like i read. a lot of slimeriana fics. and in some of them his behaviour just feels ? off ? from what i expect it to be but idk how LOL

#.txt #there’s easier to spot things like uuh #having him speak Too clearly in english/speak english too much #like his english is better than he thinks it is but he’s also not super confident with it #so he stumbles over words or repeats himself a lot #or will just get frustrated and switch back to spanish #i think that’s just me and my Speech Patterns Are Like 75% Of Accurate Characterisation thing #like if u can read something in a characters voice and it doesn’t sound weird ur doing a good job

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nando161mando · 4 months

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