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astrobydalia · 7 months

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Spicy astro observations pt. II

This post is for +18 readers only🔞

work by astrobydalia

If you’re new to astrology you should know that Mars is sex drive but Venus rules desire and pleasure. In mythology, Venus was considered the goddess of erotic love and hedonistic desire. Venus in your chart also indicates how and what type of things you enjoy and find pleasure in, so this planet can be very telling of the type of vibe that gets you in the mood

Personally, my take on this is:

Mars = how you like the fucking to be

Venus = how you like the treatment to be

Venus+Mars = how you like sex overall

Pluto/Scorpio in the 12th house often times have shameful sexual experiences and/or sexual affairs that nobody will ever know about

Mutable Mars are the ones that tend to have a rather depraved or perverted sex drive. They're just down for almost anything

I've noticed your moon sign reaaaaally shines through in sex. Like, a lot. For example Aries moons love the "right here right now" kinda sex and tend to be really fond of bold and nonchalant advances. Gemini Moon like to switch. Love to be surprised and loves teasing/mindgames. Capricorn moons will dominate, etc

Not be stereotypical but… Aries Mars will fuck anyone anywhere anytime. Will really go from 0 to 100 literally anytime. They like to fuck around but are loyal in a relationship from what I’ve seen. Every single one I’ve met was the kinda person to be very nonchalant when discussing sex, will be very vocal about being horny, their experiences, etc

Scorpio mars 🤝 lowkey behaving like a sexual predator with the person they’re interested in 😭 I swear their behaviors can get creepy if they’re attracted to you. Someone i know with this placement was asked why she was still single and she jokingly replied “guess I haven’t found a prey yet”

Mercury in the 1st house/Mercury dominant/Gemini placements you guys seriously need to STOP smirking at me like that and making me laugh or else I won’t be responsible for what happens next

>>No but seriously people forget how universally attractive mercurial energy really is. Sexual arousal starts in the brain and these mf know how to charm and enchant and they just naturally have a very endearing energy to them. Many sex symbols and models have gemini placements (Marilyn Monroe, Naomi Campbell, Megan Fox, Jennifer Lopez...)

Taurus Moon/Mars/Venus enjoy slow and possessive sex. With them you can expect hickeys, lip biting, grabbing parts of your body...

Scorpio Venus/Mercury could have a degrading kink 🫢 specially when mixed with Virgo placements. They love filthiness of being treated like/treating their partner like a little hooker

Mars-Neptune people get sexually aroused by pain, but they usually like their partner inflicting pain to them, not necessarily inflict pain to their partner

Ive noticed Virgo Mars don't necessarily wish to dominate but they can tend to end up taking the lead in bed. They want to please and ‘do a good job’ so they often be like “don’t worry babe I got this"

Women with Lilith aspecting ASC/Sun = "the only kinda girl they see is a one-night or a wife". They felt like everyone wanted to touch them but nobody wanted to love them. Those suitors who did want to "love" them thought of the Lilith person as someone who needs "taming" through marriage or only saw them as a sexual trophy. Kinda like Cassie from Euphoria. This is why I've very commonly seen these women usually take a long time to actually marry or be in a serious relationship

I’ve said this before too but as per my observation Lilith women I’ve seen didn’t really have a dark and sexual look/personality to them at all, quite the opposite they all had very angelic vibe/appearance specially when younger. But underneath all this innocent energy there was always something about them that was blatantly seductive and desirable so people project this Lilith persona onto them. It’s almost like society corrupts them and only sees them as something fuckable

In my experience, when it comes to performance those with domicile or exalted mars tend to overpromise and underdeliver while those with debilitated mars are the opposite (underpromise and overdeliver). Take that as you will.

I'm gonna talk about Pisces for a second cause I'm so sick of all this feet nonsense 😭🤚🏼

Pisces venus,mars,moon are closed off sexually but will literally let you do anything if you make them feel like it’s safe to surrender to you. These natives always remind me of hentai girls and the ahegao face

Also, I've always thought Anastasia from fifty shades of grey is a great depiction of Pisces Venus (both in and out of the bedroom)

I’ve seen a lot of people saying Pisces could like to have sex while drunk or on drugs but they actually don’t need to. Sexual pleasure itself could actually make them feel “drunk” or out of it without being under the influence. They overall enjoy feeling out of control of themselves, drunk with desire

Pisces/Neptune/12th house influence on Mars/Venus/Pluto/5th house/8th house, Mars/Pluto ruling 12th house: they are actually hard to please in bed because they desire to experience otherworldly ecstasy and may go out of their way to find it through different things (drugs, alcohol, emotional intimacy, pain, spirituality, etc.), hence the previous observation. They tend push boundaries and enjoy very odd stuff similar to Aquarius but the difference here is that Pisces is not detached, they have a tendency to romanticize any sort of kink and turn it into a deeply intimate experience, all of this as an attempt to take them closer to ecstasy.

Libra placements need to feel like they look pretty while doing it like those romantic sex scenes in movies that's why they like partners who are conventionally attractive. This doesn't necessarily mean they're vanilla but they like to perform in a way that make both parties look flattering, if they or their partner look or act too crazy/wild/messy it can actually turn them off

Also Libra/Taurus/Cancer Venus, Moon, Mars don’t like to feel disrespected!!! Doesn’t matter what they’re into sexually, they need their partner to be mindful, caring and appreciative of them and their pleasure in and out of the bedroom

Cancer placements are sooooo passionate in bed much like fire signs but only if they have feelings for you. Also, they aren't always submissive?? Yes they might want to be babied and cared for but depending on other placements they can very much dominate and take the role of care-giver and provider

People associate Neptune to porn and I don’t disagree (cause fantasies and stuff), but I’ve noticed it’s actually Mars-Uranus/Aquarius Mars and Uranus/Aquarius in the 8th house the ones who actually wanna have sex like they do in porn. That sort of more kinky, rough and emotionally detached sex

Is it just me or Sagittarius rising women are always involved in some sex scandal and constantly sexualized? I mean Kim K, Paris Hilton, Jennifer Lawrence, Scarlett Johanson… I also personally know many Sag rising women who have this “naughty girl” reputation iykwim

Venus-Moon aspects in a man’s chart is the womanizer aspect 100%. Same with men with domicile or exalted Venus and/or Moon. Their sex appeal is very charming, non-intimidating and welcoming so women easily feel soothed by their presence. If underdeveloped they will be very cringe and will tend to make inappropriate advances. I've seen this a lot in men who had a habit of objectifying women. They're horny af and don't hide it, tend to go for conventionally attractive women that can provide satisfaction to all their senses and desires

Saturn influence on Venus/Mars are VERY sensual. They like to keep the pacing very steady without losing momentum

Lilith conjunction to inner placements in synastry will always give that cat and mouse dynamics in a relationship. The Lilith person specially will want to often tease, seduce and even play mind-games to the planet person which causes a lot of sexual intrigue

If, like me, you expected fire in the the 8th house to be the most active in bed then you thought WRONG. It's the exact opposite actually. They demand to be pleased and can actually be the type to just sit back and enjoy

Aries Moon/Venus men are huge bottoms (unless chart says otherwise). They are attracted to a very bold and confident woman that can put him in his place

Earth signs are the freakiest actually. Think about it, earth rules the 3D, the tangible physical world, so it makes sense for these signs to be the most attached to sensuality and exploring physical pleasures in different ways. Honestly people with prominent earth (mars, Venus, moon specially) are always SO hot and sexy, they ooze sensuality and I've noticed they tend to be the most generous in bed, they're all about providing baby

Lilith women can be particularly fond of the cowgirl position

Idk why everyone is so hooked up on 8th house synastry for sexual matters and never talk about 12th house. I've seen this overlay a lot more in couples, specially when Mars/Venus/Moon is here. There is A LOT of unspoken tension and attraction, this house overlay is very haunting in all cases from what I've seen, specially for the house person. This person may wake up desires you didn't even know you had and will randomly loom in your memory forever

Scorpio Mars is sexually overrated I said what I said. No, they're not bad in bed but they're definitely not the sexual gods people make them out to be. What's exciting about being with these natives is the energy, anticipation and passion more than anything (also they last a reeeeaaally long time), but once they get in the act they get completely driven by their lust and desire which makes their performance a bit animalistic and reckless. They tend to be the type to go straight into the crotch area and forget any other kind foreplay and stimulation. Being with them will feel like sleeping with a very horny person that is having sex for the very first time in their lives. They're also not as freaky as people make them out to be, sure they're open to trying stuff but idk there's something about them that is low-key a bit conservative and closed off (which is fine)

Virgo, Pisces and Cancer Lilith are the type to act innocent before/during/after doing the most filthy shit

work by astrobydalia

#Spotify #astrology #astro #astro observations #astro notes #zodiac #birth chart #astrobydalia #virgo #astrology observations

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superchat · 2 years

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I would catagorize it as abusive yeah

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myuroll · 2 months

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balding buddies — gojo x fem!reader summary: satoru messes up megumi’s hair and tries (and fails) to hide it from you! fluff, crack, teenage/highschool!gojo, you guys are dating, reader is referred to as mom/seen as a mother figure

stop ik ive literally only written for gojo BUT I'M MAKING A LDS ZAYNE ONE AND CHOSO !! idk which comes first but theyre on the way trust !! (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

wc: 1.5k

"oh. fuck."

"what did you do?" the little boy asked, his voice tinged with concern, as he reached his hand to the back of his head. before he could touch it, satoru smacked his hand back down.

"nothing! it's okay! it's totally okay…" satoru said, giving an unconvincing smile to the boy through the mirror as he placed the shaver on the bathroom counter.

"then why did you curse?" megumi asked, turning around to look at satoru and making another attempt to reach the back of his head.

"that's a very good question, megumi! but you know, sometimes you just keep those questions in that big head of yours!" satoru replied, reaching to grab megumi's wrists and holding them together.

megumi tilted his head slightly to get a glimpse of the back of his head through the mirror. when he saw the bald spot, his jaw dropped in disbelief. as if he had stumbled upon a tiny desert in the middle of a lush green forest.

"what the hell did you do!? i'm in 1st grade! people are gonna think i'm balding like you!!" megumi rambled on, while satoru scratched the back of his head and let go of the six-year-old's hands.

"hey! i am not balding!" satoru protested, emphasizing his words as he reached to feel his head. "and it's not that big of a deal. you can just say all your hair is still growing in!" he continued.

with his hands on the back of his head, feeling the bare skin, megumi stared up at satoru with a shocked expression, lost for words. his face twisted in a mix of confusion and shock.

"see! it's such a good idea that i've left you speechless!" satoru beamed, his smile stretching from ear to ear, and playfully bopped megumi's nose, causing the boy to scrunch up his face in response. "now, how do we hide this from mom?" satoru pondered aloud, turning to look outside the bathroom, searching for something to hide this.

"we? nuh uh! i'm telling on you," megumi declared, shaking his head from side to side.

satoru immediately spun around, his jaw dropping to the floor.

"what? what do you mean!? i’ve been so kind and gracious! i have helped you out too, don’t i should get the same treatment in return! just this once! help me outtt!!! '' satoru exclaimed, speaking quickly and spewing out any excuse that came to mind.

rolling his eyes at satoru's desperate babbling, megumi pushed past him and made his way out of the bathroom and into the attached bedroom. satoru followed closely behind, rambling on and on about how he should help him fix the situation.

just as they reached the bedroom, they heard the front door open, causing satoru to freeze in panic.

"satoru! megumi! i'm home!" your sweet voice echoed through the entryway, its melodic tones filling the air with warmth and affection.

megumi felt a small smile form on his lips as he turned around, wearing a smug expression in anticipation of satoru's impending demise.

"hey, hey, hey!" satoru blurted out, panickingly squatting down to megumi's level and gripping his shoulders with desperation. "i'll get you anything! anything you want, just name it and it's yours! please, help me!"

"anything?" megumi replied, his voice tinged with delight.

"anything!" satoru instantly agreed as he shook his head up and down rapidly.

"i'll think about what i want, but i'll help you or whatever. deal?" megumi responded, unable to hide his joy.

"deal!" satoru happily exclaimed. "now, because she's already here, do not leave my side. i'll hide your bald spot!" satoru explained, his tone serious.

as they both walked into the living room to greet you, satoru hovered weirdly over megumi, desperately trying to shield the crime. you were hanging up your coat on a nearby rack when you turned around and beamed at the sight of the boys.

squatting down to greet megumi, you wrapped an arm around his torso and the other on the back of his head.

the back of his head.

…

the back of his head usually had black flowing locks, but now… now it was as if a barren wasteland stood in the far left side of his head. you continued to feel the area, feeling the small prickles of tiny hairs. clearly a bad job of shaving.

you pulled back, looking at megumi with a perplexed expression, while he straed right back at you with a scowl as he side-eyed satoru. then your gaze shifted to satoru, who immediately stared up at the ceiling, pretending not to feel your stare fixated on him.

"megumi… can you turn around?" you asked, your voice laced with worry. you could sense satoru's body tensing up and notice his fingers fidgeting nervously.

megumi turned his body so that his back faced you, and as your eyes laid upon the tennis ball-sized bald spot, a gasp escaped your lips. instantly standing up, you shot a disapproving look at satoru.

"what happened!? i told you we should've just gone to a barber!" you exclaimed, the frustration evident in your voice.

"that was an option? and you let this freak do it instead?" megumi retorted, scowling at satoru.

"what did i say about calling people names?" you interjected sternly, your gaze shifting from satoru to megumi.

"sorry…" megumi mumbled quietly, still wearing a scowl on his face.

"hey! it's not even that bad! i did a good job at the front, no one looks at the back anyway," satoru defended himself, attempting to salvage the situation.

"not if you have a bald spot!" megumi shot back, his glare fixed on the white-haired man.

sighing, you ignored satoru's feeble attempts to justify his actions and extended your hand to megumi. leading him back to the bathroom, satoru followed closely behind, his head low and a pout on his face, fully aware of your disappointment.

to satoru, the silent treatment was far worse than getting yelled at. at least with yelling, he would receive some sort of attention! but the dreaded…silence treatment!? how would he ever survive such a thing?

upon reaching the bathroom, you retrieved the shaver from the counter, contemplating your next move. satoru timidly placed his head on your shoulder, hoping to break through the wall of silence, but you barely acknowledge his presence.

"baby, i think you have to go bald," satoru suggested cheekily, hoping to elicit a response.

you looked at him unimpressed. "satoru! imagine if that happened to you!?" you retorted, crossing your arms and looking at him with furrowed eyebrows.

"i mean, i would rock it! my handsome face is all that matters, outshines all the other outstanding features," satoru boasted.

both you and megumi rolled your eyes in unison at satoru's egocentric comments. it was like he was trying to piss you off.

"you're going bald," you stated matter-of-factly, your tone devoid of any emotion as you brought the shaver closer to satoru.

megumi couldn't help but let out a small giggle, while satoru's face drained of color upon hearing your words.

"i-i didn't make him go bald! it was just an oopsie! i swear! this was hypothetical too! tell her megumi!" satoru rambled nervously, taking a few steps back with a forced smile and looked to megumi for help.

"i'll make it a reality," you replied, as you pulled him back into the bathroom and switched on the buzzer, the loud buzz filling the room.

“hmmm? does anyone hear something?” megumi said, cheekily as put his hand behind his right ear teasingly.

bzzz

soon the bathroom light cast a beautiful glow on satoru's pale head..

"so, about that deal of ours…" megumi asked, a smug expression adorning his face.

“shut up.”

──────────── extra:

"now, how do we hide my bald spot?" megumi fretted, his hand anxiously exploring his bald spot.

you pondered the predicament, as you reached out and gently tilted megumi's head down, examining the size and shape of the bald spot.

"maybe if you just drench your hair in water, and just keep your hair like that until it grows back you can hide it better?" you suggested, your tone laced with curiosity.

before long, megumi found himself with his head lowered, positioned under the showerhead as water cascaded down, drenching his hair. as he raised his head to meet your gaze, you and satoru froze simultaneously.

in that moment, a chilling flashback to a certain man with jet-black hair and a distinctive scar by his lip swept over both of you.

"NO!" satoru erupted, his voice piercing the air.

"do not do that! do not do that! do not do that!" he repeated in a frenzy, his words echoing with a mixture of fear and sheer panic.

perplexed by the sudden outburst, megumi stood there, his expression a mix of confusion and bewilderment.

“let’s just wear a hat…” you said in a quiet tone.

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dawndelion-winery · 2 years

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hello! I saw that your request status was open and recently ive read your "you fell first, they fell harder" can we get a part 2 of that? (w diff characters, any characters are fine!)

Idk can you?

You Fell First

They fell harder

Ft. Pantalone, Alhaitham, Scaramouche

Pantalone:

He knows all too well how easily emotions cloud one's logic

And he fully plans to exploit that fact

It just amuses him greatly to see how willingly you'd obey him, almost like a pet

Until it started to seem more like you were just a doting master, and he, your spoilt cat

It finally dawned on him when you'd noticed he looked a little tense and offered to massage his shoulders

The more he relaxed into your touch, the less he wanted you to stop touching him

Until he caught one of your hands and brought it to cup his own cheek

Nuzzling said hand before planting a kiss on your palm

Yes, he could definitely get used to this sort of treatment

And you should get used to giving him said treatment or he'll loom over you pretending to be monitoring you

Really just looking for an opportunity to hold you from behind or something

Alhaitham:

Disgusting icky plant man

He probably just didn't realised he was fond of you ngl

Which leads to a lot of "they're just a friend" moments

He's holding doors for you, even doing a lil jog to make sure he gets to the door before you do - very friendly behaviour

Leans his head on your shoulder when you flirt with him - classic friend activity

You're such a great friend for tagging along to help out with all his shenanigans<3

But why are the people he's trying to negotiate getting so...chummy with you?

Now that won't do, he's the only one who's supposed to kiss your knuckles and sidle up to you

"What are you, grouchy, their boyfriend?"

"That is correct, so if you had any semblance of sense left, you'd step away from them."

Scaramouche:

First he thinks it's a joke; you're friends now, friends joke about these things, right?

Then he starts to suspect you're trying to pull a prank on him and break his heart like everyone else dear to him did; very funny, but he's figured it out so please stop

But when you insist it's not? He's still suspicious

It's like feeding a feral cat, you drop the food (your affection) a little bit in front of you and step back so he can inch forward and snatch it up before retreating, getting a teeny bit closer to you each time

He also finds comfort in you patting his head - ruffling his hair and the likes - not that he'd admit to it outright

But you'll find he's more willing to incline his head towards you, especially when you're in need of a little comfort

You'll probably never really notice just how hard he's fallen for you because he won't make it obvious, but know that anything you feel for him, he feels stronger

He scares himself with how much he adores you, how much vulnerability he shows you

And that's really the only way to know you've caught him hook, line, and sinker, because under no circumstances would he let himself be so bare before simply anyone

Taglist[send an ask to be added/removed]: @myluvkeiji @pluvioseprince @aqui-soba @favonius-captain @tiredsleep @raincxtter @gensimping-for-all @irethepotato @almond-adeptus @mx-kamisato @yuzuricebun @chaosinanutshell @heizours @haliyamori @callmemeelah @sadlonelybagel @plinkuro @thevictoriousmoon @mastering-procrastinating @lovers-on-the-eiffel @cxlrosii @miss-fantazmagoria @lychme

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cannabiscomrade · 10 months

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It's Gastroparesis Awareness Month

Hi! I have gastroparesis and I'm an insufferable know-it-all so let's talk about it!

Gastroparesis, or a paralyzed stomach, is a condition that causes delayed gastric emptying.

This can cause a range of symptoms and complications:

nausea

vomiting

early satiety/fullness

upper gastric pain

heartburn

malabsorption

dehydration

malnutrition

Gastroparesis can be treated by a gastroenterologist, but often needs to be managed by a motility specialist due to a lot of misconceptions about the condition. Providers, especially in the emergency department, will commonly misdiagnose gastroparesis as cannabis-hyperemesis syndome, cyclic vomiting syndrome, gastritis, food poisoning, etc.

There are several commonly known causes of gastroparesis like vagus nerve damage from diabetes, injury to the stomach, and stomach surgery like hernia repair or bariatric surgery. There are also idiopathic cases with no known cause. Other causes of gastroparesis are:

Connective tissue disorders like HSD and EDS (commonly hEDS and cEDS)

Post-viral (like COVID, viral gastritis, mononucleosis/Epstein-Barr)

Restrictive eating disorders

Autoimmune diseases like Systemic sclerosis (scleroderma), Lupus, Hashimoto's

Central nervous system disorders

Gastroparesis also has common comorbidities with conditions like:

POTS and other forms of dysautonomia (POTS, EDS, and gastroparesis are a common triad of diagnoses)

MCAS

SMAS (which can also present with similar symptoms to GP)

Intestinal dysmotility and esophageal dysmotility disorders (known as global dysmotility)

PCOS with insulin resistance

Endometriosis

SIBO/SIFO

Chronic intestinal pseudo-obstruction

Migraines

Certain medications like Ozempic and other drugs in that class act on the digestive system to delay gastric emptying, which has caused people to be diagnosed with gastroparesis. Some people report that their cases have not gone away since stopping the medication, others report feeling better after stopping. Other drugs like opiates and narcotics can cause delayed gastric and intestinal motility as well, but these are commonly known side effects of those painkiller classes.

Gastroparesis is classed based on severity and graded based on how you respond to treatment.

Severity of delay ranges from mild to very severe, and this is based on your actual stomach retention calculated at 4 hours into a gastric emptying study.

The grading scale ranges from one to three, one being mild and three being gastric failure.

There is no consistent single treatment that is proven to work for gastroparesis, and there is no cure. Treatments can consist of:

Diet changes (3 Step Gastroparesis Diet, liquid diet, oral sole source nutrition)

Prokinetic (motility stimulating) drugs

Anti-nausea medications

Proton-pump inhibitors

Gastric stimulator/gastric pacemaker

Pyloric botox and dilation

G-POEM/pyloroplasty

Post-pyloric tube feeding

Gastric venting/draining

Parenteral nutrition

IV fluids

Other surgical interventions like gastrectomy or rarely, transplant

Gastroparesis is a terrible disease and I hope that if any of these symptoms resonate with you that you can get checked out. I was misdiagnosed for a long time before getting a proper gastroparesis diagnosis, and all it took was a gastric emptying study. This is ESPECIALLY true if you're having post-COVID gastrointestinal problems that are not improving. I almost died from starvation ketoacidosis because of how serious my GP got in a short period of time post-COVID (I had GP before COVID), and now I'm tube reliant for all my nutrition and hydration.

Stay safe friends!

#gastroparesis #disability tag

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800-dick-pics · 1 year

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Praying for a Better New Year!!!

Im a Black disabled 2S and my girlfriend a reconnecting Indigenous trans woman have been struggling almost continuously throughout the pandemic. We have gone thru lots of physical, emotional and systematic state violence and We both are at our breaking points.

And before i get deeper into this im genuinely asking yall DO NOT TRIGGER TAG this post as it will basically get minimal traction, because this is a donation post!

Many things have increased my/our financial load and stress in the past 6 months, my (still abusive) mother had a series of mini strokes/1 heart attack which led to me taking care of her, more bills and all the house work. Due to her still being abusive Ive chosen to start helping her from a far, because my mental stability has been worn thin and constantly on the back burner.

My partner @grumblybutch this year has gone through a lot of family abuse, transmisogyny, housing and food insecurity, which has really broken their spirit. With all thats going on in our lives as well as personal, cultural and spirtual reasons my girlfriend really wants to get dual citizenship and be able to live/work on their land again.

We have been cfunding already to make this happen but recently we have a had 3 major set backs to getting my partner dual citizenship.

1. We have found mold INSIDE the walls which we cant fix until the pnw rain stops, we need to buy 2 HEPA air filters for the rooms until we can fix the whole walls, because my mother and I have breathing issues, approx $300-$350

2. My ex boss literally stole $455 from under me right before the holiday break, hasn't paid me for a very long time, so until I get that money we have had to dip into the flight/citizenship fund, but even then we havent been able to get much in the mean of groceries or necessities

3. A few days ago my partner attempted suicide due to all the stressors life has put them through this year, and while this isnt an initial monetary set back, we are going to prioritize our mental health as much as possible, esp my girlfriends after this. We are looking for treatment options for them atm but since theyre out of state we have to pay out of pocket for the treatment they need.

Our original goal to get the funds for tickets/citizenship was January 7th but Its clear that with 7 days left, and 3 major set backs we will not be meeting our goals by then

We are going to use what funds we have left to get some necessities and basics for the house. And hope to re raise the money for tickets and for the HEPA filters and mental healthcare my girlfriend really needs.

our new goal is $1,800, due to the various setbacks, but when I get paid Ill be saving some to go toward our goal as well.

I truly just want to be able to breath, eat and keep us safe before I leave with my lover back to her land, This is all very important to us, thank you for reading.

CA: $sleepyhen or $grumblybear

VN: wildwotko or XochiRose

DM @grumblybutch for PP

#twoc #land back #community care #two spirit #lgbt crowdfund #mutual aid #please dont dm me or my girlfriend abt shit rn #were both mentall fragile

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its-time-to-write · 11 months

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Hi,

Just discovered your page and I am obsessed! I was wondering if you could do something about Jamie getting hurt and the reader meeting him in the treatment room and comforting him? Or something along those lines, I trust you!

Thanks!

Dang, you’re putting my angst skills to the test! I wrote this instead of doing homework. Probs won’t post again till the weekend, but who knows? Not me, that’s for sure. Thanks for requesting!

feeling fragile, can’t you tell

Football matches are always tense. It’s all about squeezing Keeley’s hand when Richmond gets the ball, booing when they miss and screaming when they score. You never know how they’re going to end until they’re done, and god it kills you. Especially when Jamie has the ball. You feel like you can’t breathe until you see it swoosh into the net, after which your chest loosens up.

You love it. Mostly.

The part you don’t love is the part that results in the medics being called onto the field. Some injuries are accidental, some are on purpose. You hate those. You’ve watched more players kick, shove, and punch each other than you would care to count. Your least favorite injury so far was when a burly player broke Sam’s foot “on accident.” You thought Roy and Isaac were going to commit murder.

Jamie told you the next morning that the whole team egged the man’s house that night. That’s why he had been late coming over. He wouldn’t tell you who’s idea it was, but you have a vague recollection of Jamie telling childhood stories about egging houses with his friends.

Injuries are truly awful.

Which is why you’re standing stock-still in the owner’s box, clutching Keeley’s arm and willing Jamie to get up.

He’d done this thing where he kicked the ball away from the opposing team, but landed on his back funny. Rebecca whispers, “Oh god, it’s Roy all over again,” and you remember being told about Roy’s injury. The one that took him out of the game for good.

Jamie’s only twenty-five, you reason to yourself, he has to be ok.

He still hasn’t gotten up. The medical team are rushing onto the field, and you’re pushing past Rebecca, running downstairs to go find him.

Keeley is hot on your heels, running as best she can in her heels which, honestly, is actually pretty good.

You’re not quite sure where you’re going, feeling blinded by worry. Keeley grabs your arm and tugs you toward the treatment room.

You burst through the doors right behind Keeley, who has almost run smack into Roy. He looks grim, more grim than usual.

“What’s wrong with him?” you whisper, mindful of the atmosphere in the treatment room. Jamie is on a table on his back, face white.

“Passed out,” Roy responds gruffly. “Fucked his leg and back pretty bad, but doesn’t explain why he’s fucking unconscious.”

Tears are beginning to form, and Keeley wraps her arms around your waist.

You move out of the doorway so the medics can pick up Jamie in a stretcher and move him to the ambulance.

You get a closer look at him as he passes by, features slack.

You feel like you’re choking.

—

The ride to the hospital is a blur. You’re not even sure how you ended up in Roy’s car, but you’re there, sitting in the back seat with Keeley’s comforting presence the only thing keeping you loosely tethered to reality.

Your mind is running through every possible scenario as to why he passed out. None of them are good. He’s messed up his back and leg before, but never to this point. And his face.

You can’t stop thinking about his face.

To be honest, he looked dead.

Panic starts to hit again, and it takes every ounce of control you have to force yourself to breathe.

—

You’re outside Jamie’s hospital room now. His doctor said he pulled some muscles, and passed out from a combination of too little water, food, and sleep. The pain must have been enough to trigger his body into finally catching up with itself.

You sigh, and push open the door, Roy and Keeley promising to wait for you outside.

Jamie is propped up in the bed, IVs in his arms for hydration.

At the sight of you, he says a soft, “hey, babe.”

He’s still so pale, and the tears you’d been holding in start streaming out.

“What happened, Jamie?” you ask, sitting on the chair next to his bed. You take his hand in yours. “How did I not know you weren’t eating?”

Jamie’s quiet for a moment, and you can see a glimmer of a tear in his left eye.

“I dunno,” he replies softly.

He doesn’t say anything after that, so you’re just left sitting there, hand-in-hand, in silence. He’s staring at the end of his bed, you’re staring at his face.

When it becomes clear he has no intention of speaking up you say, “Jamie.”

He turns to you, eyes hollow. “Saw me dad last week.”

You blink.

Oh.

“Oh,” you say out loud.

Jamie is silent for a beat, then says, “Didn’t tell ya because I didn’t want you to worry. He’s a piece of shit and my fuckin problem, not yours.”

You shake your head and bring his hand up to your lips. “Jaim. I’m so sorry. I am so, so sorry,” because you know exactly what he’s saying.

You had assumed you hadn’t seen Jamie due to all his extra training.

You had assumed that he was taking care of himself in preparation for the game, like he always did.

You had assumed too much, because his dad was an unknown variable that threw a wrench in every place he found himself in.

The last time his dad had shown up, Jamie had tried to stop eating. You say tried because you basically force-fed him after the first day. He also couldn’t sleep. You could feel him tossing and turning, getting up to pace around, just restless. You’d rub his shoulders, hold him close, but nothing worked. He didn’t sleep well for two weeks when he was finally so tired that his body pretty much just shut down.

So. His passing out makes sense now.

Jamie is gripping your hand, knuckles white, tears beginning to roll down his face. His face, which he is trying to keep stoic, and is beginning to return to its normal color.

“Jamie,” you say. “Jamie, you don’t have to keep all this in.”

He shrugs.

“No, I’m serious,” you continue, “You shouldn’t keep this all in. We’re a team, you know? We’re supposed to share this kind of thing with each other, and if you think I don’t want to hear it or can’t handle it, then that’s a problem.”

Jamie whips his head around from his blank stare at the wall to your face. He whispers, “Are we breaking up?” fear evident in his expression.

“No,” you reply. “No. We’re just- we’re just figuring it out. I don’t want you to feel like you have to keep things from me.”

You’re beginning to lose feeling in your hand. Jamie is looking somewhat relieved, but still not great.

“How long are you in here?” you ask.

“Doctor wants to keep me overnight. Make sure I’m hydrated or some shit.”

You hesitate. “Do you- do you want me to stay with you? I don’t have to, if you want to be alone I can just-”

“Yes.”

Jamie’s color is really coming back now, and he looks like someone’s removed a huge weight from his chest. “Yes, I would really fucking like it if you stayed. I can move over so you don’t have to sleep on that fucking shitty plastic couch.”

You crack a smile at that as he gingerly scoots over. You climb into the bed, mindful of his leg and the IVs. He throws an arm around you with less care than you think he should have, but you’re not going to worry about that right now so you just snuggle into his side. He’s warm, and you didn’t realize how cold you were until this exact moment.

There’s a knock on the door, and Keeley pokes her head in.

“Everything alright, babes?” she asks.

“All good here, Keels,” Jamie responds. You give her a small smile, which she returns.

“Alright then, Roy and I are gonna go. We’ll be back to pick you up tomorrow, yeah?” She points to you. “Text me if you need anything. Won’t be getting much sleep tonight.”

You’re not sure if she means she isn’t sleeping due to the excitement of the night or because she’s going home with Roy, but she’s gone before you can ask.

You sigh and put your head on Jamie’s shoulder.

You say, “Don’t ever fucking do that again, ok?” but it comes out as a plea, voice on the edge of breaking.

He replies, “I won’t,” in such a soft, sincere tone that you believe him.

You breath deeply for the first time that night, just glad that he’s ok and you’re together. You are a team, after all.

#jamie tartt x reader #jamie tartt fanfiction #jamie tartt imagine #jamie tartt x y/n #jamie tartt x you #jamie tartt #ted lasso

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tokio-motel · 8 months

Note

YEHDKBDKDJ I THINK I GOT THE GOLDEN IDEA

HEEHEHEHEHE LEMME GET 4 BIG DICK BIG MACS(oh lord ive had too much sugar its full band headcannons seperate💀💀) with a bf who gives em princess treatment n shi😊

like mf will drive for them do that hand on thigh thing, will tie their shoe, buy em expensive ass shit, pull them on his lap(bro is prolly shorter than them too💀), opening the door for em alat jazz and you can look up more stufff(dont look at the urban definition)

LBZJSHDKSN STOP I CAN JUST IMAGINE TOM NOT TAKING THE TREATMENT AND MAKING READER TAKE IT INSTEAD I CANT😭😭😭

BAND X READER: PRINCESS TREATMENT

4 big dick big macs..oh lord. i regret looking at urban dictionary.

BILL:

・YES. YES. A THOUSAND TIMES YESSS!!!

・He likes being treated like royaltyyyyy

・Having you tie his shoes? He feels so special STOPP

・Your hand resting on his thigh as you drive, rubbing your thumbs in circular motions. He's so happy 🙏

・Sitting on your lap, leaning his head on the top of yours. He just feels so loved and cared for.

・Loves when you spoon him, holding him close to you and kissing his fading tattoo on his neck over and over.

・Feels like the luckiest man on earth if you offer to pay for his nails

"M/N, are you sure? It's really expensive and-"

"Of course I'm sure, here." then giving him like 200 fucking dollars 💀

・Especially likes if you help him with his mohawk!

TOM:

・He's not used to being treated like this. Like, he normally takes on the role of buying stuff, opening doors, etc.

・But he can't help but feel slightly flustered, smiling as you hand him gifts.

・HE LOVES GIFTS WHAT. I keep saying it over and over but gift giving is his love languageeeeee 🤞🤞🤞

・Eventually he starts to challenge you, doing things you would previously do.

・Like even if you has already opened the door for him he'd hold it open aswell, waiting for you to go through.

"Tom I got the door first, just walk in."

"Why don't you walk in? Your closer to the entrance."

"..Tom."

・...yeah it takes him a while before he just gives up, letting you take care of him.

GEORG:

・He feels relaxed yet..confused?

・Like Tom he's used to spoiling his partner, so having you spoil him is definitely something.

・That doesn't mean he wants you to stop, no. He loves it when you buy gifts for him or open the door to a store. Hell, even something as little as holding his hand has him wrapped around your finger.

・Honestly feels like a child if you tie his shoes 😭

"M/N, 'cmon. I can do that myse-"

"No."

・..Oh. Okay then.

・Just kinda let's it happen, he really does like it. It's just...new.

・Can't help but giggle whenever you pull him on your lap, running your fingers through his soft brown hair.

GUSTAV:

・He likes the fact he can worry less around you.

・He feels so safe, so happy and giddy whenever you call him "honey" or "love".

・Absolutely LOVES shopping with you. He feels bad about spending your money and tries to take out his own wallet but you demand insist you pay instead.

・He waits for you to open the car door for him 💔

・Loves cuddling with you, having you wrap your arms around him. It makes him forget about all his worries, instead focusing on you.

・He feels bad if you buy him something too expensive.

"Holy shit, M/N! Do you know how expensive this is-"

"...yeah. Considering I'm the one that bought the drum set, I would know."

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cleoluvrr · 7 months

Text

Smarty IV (Rafe Cameron x OC)

SYNOPSIS: smart girl isn’t as smart as rafe cameron.

WARNINGS: mature content; dark!rafe, toxic relationship, domestic violence, verbal abuse, blackmail, jealousy, general violence, manipulative behavior, explicit language, substance abuse & addiction, use of guns, mentions of past crimes, obsession

series masterlist

masterlist

“i wish you could just give me one day, laia…” rafe sighed loudly into to the empty space in front of him, fingers tensing around the steering wheel before dropping to his lap. “just one day where you aren’t being a total bitch.”

a scoff escaped my throat, the sound coupled with a roll of my eyes. it took everything to bite my tongue, memories of the last time i called him a bitch reason enough to do so.

“because i didn’t want you talking to the bitch–the girl, you were fucking while i was away?” i corrected myself immediately. it was out of character to call other women such derogatory names, but the word flowed so easily off my tongue. “the one that we just argued about a few days ago?”

“jesus christ, all she did was say ‘hi’! she was working!”

“she could have been lying on the floor dying of anaphylactic shock, rafe. i don’t give a fuck.” i shoved the car door open and jumped out before turning back to face him. “i told you not to talk to her.”

slamming the door shut, i left my boyfriend in the truck by himself as i trudged down the dock to where he keeps his boat. the sky was a clear blue and the sun was beaming down onto the earth, the warm yellow light leaving a sheen of sweat on my skin that was only amplified by the humidity. it was a beautiful day, calm waves and a stunning horizon in the distance gracing the view of onlookers surrounding the dock, but i couldn’t begin to appreciate it.

i tried giving rafe the silent treatment after finding out about his indecent activities, but he was never one to let that go on for very long.

after the fourth day of avoiding all contact with him, he made an appearance at my front door with little patience for my attitude. he gave no room to argue when he told me to get dressed and dragged me out to his car a few minutes later. i didn’t fight back because i knew it would make no difference.

he took us to the island club, and that girl happened to be working today. i’ve never been one to be jealous of rafe talking to other girls, but the fact that she got to fuck him before i did enraged me beyond comprehension. the scoff of annoyance that left my body as she greeted the two of us was out of my control. i didn’t notice that i had been mean-mugging here until rafe told me to ‘fix my face’ when she walked away.

the entire car ride after our lunch together was filled with a tense silence; one that remained until we arrived at the dock and was broken by him.

“i don’t wanna argue with you, laia. i was just being nice.” rafe tried to hold a hand out for me to board the boat, but i paid it no mind. hopping over the gap between the ledge of the yacht and the water, i made my way to the front with my boyfriend dragging his feet behind me.

“i gave you four days of peace, rafe.” my eyes cut him with the sharpness of the hunting knives he keeps in his basement. raising a finger, i point it directly into his broad chest. “you insisted on coming to bother me knowing that i’m mad at you. on top of that, you took me to the place that girl works! so no, you don't get to complain about me being a bitch.”

i take a seat on the right side of the steering wheel, eyes trained on the water in front of us. the blonde sighs loudly, the bass of it filled with frustration.

we remained silent for an amount of time that i’m sure was longer than necessary, but i refused to be the first to break it. rafe stops the boat a couple nautical miles away from where we were originally, the dark blue water surrounding all sides of us.

“baby?” rafe locks the wheel in place before take a seat next to me. i feel his eyes burning into my figure, gazing hotter than the summer sun beaming down onto us.

“yes, rafe?” the answer to his call was released with a tired sigh. i was genuinely upset about what happened, and hearing him talk was beginning to give me a headache.

my boyfriend takes a seat next to me, reaching over to pull me closer. he ignores my protests as he sits me on his lap and wraps his arms around my waist snugly, resting his chin on my shoulder.

“you know i love you, right?” the vibrations of rafe’s chest traveled through my back as he spoke. “i didn’t mean to make you upset. i haven’t thought about her in forever, i really was just being polite…”

it took everything in me not to roll my eyes.

he just told a blatant lie, right to my face. if he hadn’t thought about her in forever, why did she text him just a few days ago? if they hadn’t been in contact recently, then she wouldn’t have thought they were still on speaking terms. on top of that, there was no reason for him to speak to her–politeness be damned. he knew i was mad–and why i was mad–but chose to acknowledge her anyway.

it was a habit of rafe’s to take me out on dates, buy expensive gifts, and sing praises about how much he loves me whenever i was upset with him. he thought i didn’t notice, but after all this time it was hard not to pick up on the pattern. there’s only so many times shopping sprees and worship will make someone forget why they were upset in the first place.

“okay.” my voice was edged with irritation. i tried my best to disguise it with indifference, but there was nothing rafe didn’t notice when it came to me.

“okay?” i could feel him turn his head to look at me, the side of my face burning hot from his fiery gaze.

“yes, okay, rafe.” the reply was snippier than i meant for it to be. “i love you, too–what do you want me to say?”

a puff of air escaped through his nose; a sign of his own temper flaring up. i could feel his arms flex against me for a second before settling in their natural state.

“well; i’d like it to sound like you mean it, first of all.” the sass in his voice was evident. “i’ve already apologized, like, forty times. it happened, laia–i’m sorry that i slept with her. i’m sorry that i acknowledged her existence today. what else do you want from me?”

“you slept with her, rafe!” i swiveled my own head to meet his eyes directly, the familiar sight matching the ocean below us in color. “you can apologize forty-thousand times–i don’t give a fuck! that is so…beyond…i don’t know what you want from me, either.”

throwing his arms off, i rose to my full height before turning to face him with folded arms.

he stood up as well, head towering far above mine. i stumbled forward from being pulled back into his body, a pair of strong hands gripping my hips keeping me in place. there was no point in trying to back away–it wouldn’t make any difference when he would just put me right back where i was.

it was obvious that he was really sorry, but it was also clear that he wasn’t too happy about me not accepting his apologies. usually, i would let things go just so we didn’t have to argue. this time was different–he didn’t like that.

“if i could go back in time and un-fuck her, i would.” the wet muscle of his tongue poked out from his plush lips before returning to its place. “but i can’t. we were on a break that you wanted! it’s in the past now, laia, alright? do you think picking fights and ignoring me is gonna change what happened?”

i blinked up at him slowly. mouth sewn shut, i wasn’t really sure how to respond to that.

he was right; picking fights wasn’t going to change anything. my anger was genuine, but it had dissipated over the days that i’d isolated myself from him. i was mostly trying to make a point on how he couldn’t get away with doing things that hurt me and then expect to shower me in praise to receive my forgiveness.

shrugging as a reply, i turned my head away from him to face the horizon. my head was snapped back in his direction by a set of fingers sinking into my jawline. rafe’s eyes held the same softness they alway did when they held me in their gaze, but his exasperation was clear as the sky above.

“you look at me when i’m talking to you. do you think that’s going to fix things?” my throat bobbed at the scolding, his stern voice covering my skin in goosebumps inappropriate for the warm temperature of the nature that surrounds us. shaking my head no silently, i give him my honest answer. “right, okay…so are you acting out for attention? what are you trying to do?”

i shrugged again. the blond chuckled from above, amused by my sudden loss of words.

“i’m trying to show you that you can't just…say you love me and expect me to let shit go.” i said. “you took it way too far this time, rafe.”

“okay, so you wanna break up?”

i furrowed my brows at him, head jerking back in surprise. the question caught me off guard. he looked down at me expectantly and watched my eyes open and shut rapidly as i blinked away the shock.

“i never said that.” my head shook in denial at the accusation. “if i wanted to leave you, i would have done it before any of this ever happened.”

“so if you don’t want to break up, what the fuck are you still mad for?” i wasn’t sure if he was genuinely confused or angry; most likely overcome with both feelings. “tell me what it’s gonna solve when i’ve already apologized and i stopped talking to her before you even came back from school because i knew that i wanted you, not her. it’s not gonna solve anything, right?”

i hate it when he makes points. it made me feel stupid whenever he called me out and happened to be right–like right now. there were no plans for me to leave him; if i wanted to then i would have done it a year ago before i left for school. obviously i wanted us to work out, i loved him.

it was more of a point to make for myself than him. rafe gets away with most things, simply because i hate fighting with him. if it meant that things would go back to normal, i would let it go–even when it hurt me. i couldn’t let him just walk all over me anymore, that’s what i was trying to prove.

instead, it’s making me feel like i’m being difficult.

it was embarrassing. it shouldn’t be, but i could feel my skin heat up from the emotion washing over me in a thick layer that overpowered the sun above.

rafe took my slice as agreeance and nodded his head in understanding. bringing his face closer, i could feel his nose brush against mine, the gesture leaving a ticklish feeling in its wake.

“we’re adults, baby.” his warm breath landed against my lips as he spoke in a gentle voice. “that silent treatment shit is childish and you know i don’t like it. it’s over now, okay? just let it be over–let’s just focus on each other. that outside stuff isn’t important; just us.”

closing the minimal space between us, rafe presses his lips to mine. my eyes flutter shut at the familiar feeling. it was short and sweet; he pulled away before it went any further in order to gage my reaction. not seeing any resistance, the blond returns to the contact.

rafe’s lips open slightly, just wide enough for him to lick at the seam of my lips. i follow his lead, lips allowing him the access to slide his tongue into my mouth. the hand at my waist pulls me in so close that you’d think he wants me to live in his skin.

the feeling of his tongue against mine was pure sweetness, the taste of him something i missed more than i thought. nothing about it was sloppy, it was passionate and slow. the way he would pull away just slightly with my lip in tow, low eyes watching as it snapped back into place before he captured it again in a kiss.

rafe groans when try to pull away, the sound followed by the hand resting on my face relocating to the back of my head to tangle itself in my hair. he deepens the kiss, teeth smacking together just barely as allows himself to be a little rougher.

humming in protest, i place a firm hand against his chest to separate us. my head pulls back when my boyfriend attempts to chase after my evading lips.

“just us.” i whisper, repeating the words that left his mouth just a moment earlier.

something in the back of my mind set off alarm bells at the way rafe smiled, the look in his eyes unsettling in the strangest way, but I tuned them out in favor on focusing on the way his lips felt on mine.

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron x pogue!reader #rafe cameron x reader #drew starkey #rafe cameron x kook!reader #rafe cameron x oc #obx fanfiction #outer banks #obx1 #obx2 #dark!rafe cameron #obx3 #cleoluvrr fics

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atticustimestwo · 1 month

Note

do you mind sharing a bit more about your analysis of heart,,,

i'd love to!! (i assume this is about the heart critique piece i did a few months ago, but please correct me if im wrong!)

in terms of the "a critique on the treatment of hearts characterization" piece, i wanted to visually explore some frustrations i have had with how the fanbase seems to fall into some unfortunate patterns when it comes to hearts character.

frequently, i see heart infantilized - this either comes across as him being a kicked dog unable to help himself because he is too weak, a baby angel who did nothing wrong, or a feral gremlin child. i think flattening his character down to any/all of these is, for lack of a better word, a bit problematic?

; one reason being it just defeats the idea of emotions being a visceral, intense thing. heart is meant to represent emotion in its purest form; i feel woobifying him takes away from that concept because it shows having emotions as being inherently weaker or less mature. i think a lot of people kinda forget HMS aren't just tv show characters. they represent greater concepts that near everyone feels and feels uniquely - theyre more sensitive than your typical character. thats not saying treating them as characters is bad! everyone relates to them differently because they are so personal, they make them their own and i think thats really awesome!! ; but boiling them down to these really generic tropes and making heart a baby kinda defeats the idea that emotions are a real, visceral, multifaceted concept. ; another reason i think it can be problematic is that it sometimes unintentionally comes across really ableist? a lot of these 'fandom-y' tropes are already rooted in ableism in some way, which is bad on its own, but theres also the important addition that heart is frequently portrayed as blind.

ive seen people time and time again fall into stereotypes with heart that his blindness makes him weak/helpless/childish. truthfully I dont think people do this intentionally, but its still internalized ableism showing up. i recognize that a lot of the people who woobify heart tend to be on the younger side, so they dont really recognize that theyre flattening him down like that- not out of malicious ignorance, but because theyre kids who havent really had the life experience yet to grasp the full concepts of the album or realize they might be implying harmful stereotypes; that doesn't necessarily mean its okay, but i think its just them being uneducated cause theyre kids and they have yet to learn that stuff. ; all that being said, im not trying to police people on how they portray characters. im not any authority on this fandom/album by any means imaginable - im just a fan like everyone else here! like i said before, characterizing HMS is not inherently a bad thing at all ! its fun, and its what this fanbase is built on in the first place! its so great that everyone can interpret and relate to HMS so personally, i think chonny really hit it off with the concept for the album and the execution is stellar! seeing all the fanart and different interpretations of it and the characters is such a beautiful thing, no matter if its joking, lighthearted, or deep! ; at the end of the day, theres no wrong way to interpret this album, and theres no wrong way to characterize heart. more than anything that critique piece was built up frustration turned to a call to action for people to stop and think deeply for a moment about how they portray heart - to open eyes if someone might be unknowingly flattening or adding problematic ideas to their characterizations. and to just be mindful of that going forward! 💜

#cj heart #chonnys charming chaos compendium #cccc

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aquaquadrant · 1 month

Note

I was wondering if you had an estimated date of when you will post the next HTP chapter?

Like, leaving us on such a cliffhanger must be a crime! It cant be legal!

Anyways, while I wait for it, Ive decided to copy paste every chapter into a doc and mark it up color code style for all my over analyzing needs. It took me an hour but it was worth it.

Have a good week and take care :)

(This is meant to be genuine, not mean or passive aggressive, just so you know. While I indeed am anxiously awaiting Chapter 10 by highlighting the chapters on a doc like that one photo of a bible page that’s highlighted with different colors. This isn’t meant to be mean or pressuring, take your time and take care of yourself)

⬆️(Ah poo, Im an over thinker

hey there, no worries y’all- i love seeing my reader’s enthusiasm and it’s reassuring to see continued interest in the series. i’d been hoping to have BOTH of the final ‘from eden’ chapters done before summer. but i have to admit, progress on the next chapter hasn’t been as forthcoming as i’d expected, for a couple reasons.

the first is health-related. not to be too TMI, but i recently got diagnosed with crohn’s disease. my symptoms started ages ago but have really ramped up in the last couple months, and the diagnosis was a lengthy and involved process (started the hunt back in november, presumptively diagnosed after a colonoscopy in feb, definitively diagnosed when biopsies came back over spring break) and even when i was simply waiting for results, it occupied a lot of my mental capacity. and ofc it happened to line up with me turning 26 and needing new insurance, which has caused lots of delays. anyone dealing with the american health care system while chronically ill will tell you it’s a frustrating, exhausting process. as of right now, i’m still waiting to start treatment 🫠

but honestly, even more than that, the biggest thing stopping me from writing is… me? 😂 so there’s this thing that happens after i post a chapter that’s like… decision paralysis? except it’s just that sometimes, i literally can’t bring myself to start the next chapter. it’s like, i have this unfounded fear that all my writing up until this point has been some magical fluke out of my control, and i’m not capable of ‘pulling it off’ again. i guess you could call it a form of imposter syndrome (which i already encounter enough in my vet school life). it gets worse after posting something that was a particularly massive undertaking or was insanely well-received bc i’m scared i won’t be able to top it- even though the impact of storytelling is supposed to be cohesive, and it’s unrealistic for every chapter to be ‘bigger and better’ (what does that even mean?) than the last one because they serve different purposes at different points in the story. i know this, rationally, but that doesn’t stop the irrational fear of failure from making me avoid writing.

i’m not sharing this to make excuses or garner sympathy, or fish for compliments, and certainly not to make anyone feel guilty for asking about updates. i just feel like maybe this will resonate with anyone who has the same experience. and also to share hope, because despite how often this feeling rears its ugly head, i’ve still been able to push through and get back to writing- and i’m always very happy with the result. sometimes it just takes longer than i’d like (pro tip: writing on ur phone is less intimidating, tho it’s more of a pain). but in any case, the next chapter of ‘from eden’ is well underway and i still hope to have the series done before summer’s end^^

#hels to pay au #HTP ask #wow that’s WAY more rambling abt my personal life than i typically do #but NEVER FEAR i wouldn’t leave y’all on that cliffhanger forEVER i’m not THAT cruel <3

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burntb4bydoll · 1 year

Note

OMGG could you please write 2023!Tom with like a daddy kink if that’s okay? he’s literally just looks so…

UM YES?? IVE LITERALLY BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS EXACT IDEA FOR LIKE A WEEK NOW BUT DIDNT KNOW IF PEOPLE WOULD THINK ITS WEIRD OR SOMETHING

2023 Tom Kaulitz x fem!reader

Summery: you just want some attention from Tom :(

Warnings: daddy kink, hair pulling, praising, fingering, oral (fem!receiving) no real sex, Tom gives reader the princess treatment🤭

“Baby, please. Im doing something right now.” You dramatically huff out a breath and throw yourself onto the couch. Tom just rolls his eyes and continues to do whatever it is that he needed to finish on his laptop. You had been trying to get him to notice you for the past 3 hours, you had even took off your pants and walked around the house wearing nothing but his shirt and a lacy pair of underwear. Still nothing.

An idea pops into your head that makes you grin widely. You slowly creep closer to him and lean up against his side, tucking you head into his neck to give him light kisses. He doesn’t engage with you and continues to quickly type away on the small keyboard.

“I want your attention, please daddy..” his fingers suddenly stop typing, and his eyes open widely. He gazes down at you and you give him a little smile. The laptop was quickly shut and he moves your body so that you’re laying on the couch. His fingers slide up your throat and gently squeezes.

“What did you say?” He didn’t sound angry, he sounded flustered. You bring your hand up to hold onto his wrist and pout your lips out at him,

“I was just saying how I wanted your attention, daddy.” The confused look on his face slowly morphed into a look of lust. He pulls you into a messy kiss, moving his knee to rest in between your legs. One of his hands remains on your throat and the other comes up to tangle in your hair, giving it a tug to make you tip you head back.

“Such a needy girl, aren’t you? Making me stop my work to play with you,” he scoffs quietly “you needed daddy’s attention that bad?” You can feel your body start to heat up at the nickname he called himself. Honestly, you didn’t think he would enjoy it too much, you just wanted to get a rise out of him. His hand gives you hair another tug and you groan,

“Mhm. I’ve been waiting for you to pay attention to me all day.” He smirks at how out of breath you sound.

“Well, I’m paying attention to you now. What do you want baby? You want my fingers? My mouth?” You nod your head as much as you can with his hand still gripping it tightly.

“Want both, daddy. Please..” he releases you from both of his hand and moves down to lay between your legs, pulling your underwear down with his teeth.

“Oh? You’re so greedy, princess.” He laughs, and you could feel his breath hit your soaking wet core. You arched your back slightly and a sharply inhaled. His hands massaged your thighs as he kissed around where you needed him the most. Not only had he been ignoring you, but now he’s teasing you? What an asshole.

“Tom..stop teasing, asshole.” Your words came out sounding demanding, which made his raise an eyebrow at you. You regret using that tone with him, but it was too late to take it back now. His hand comes back up to squeeze your throat harder than he had done before and pulled you to look at him.

“Hey, I was being nice and giving you what you’ve been begging for and thats how you talk to me? Say sorry.” Now he was the one demanding things.

“I didn’t mean it. ‘M sorry daddy..” you bat your eyelashes at him, trying to make him ease up on you. Luckily, he’ll give you whatever you want as long as you ask nicely. So he runs his tongue up your cunt until he reaches your clit. He starts to draw slow circles on it as two of his fingers poke through your entrance. You throw your legs over his shoulders and gently stroke his hair with one of your hands. “You’re so good, daddy. I love when you use your mouth~” you knew that being sweet to him would only make him give in to your desires more. He pulls his face away from you but keeps up the steady pace of his fingers.

“Yeah? You’re being such a good girl for me, baby.” You smile at him before he dives back down to suck on your sensitive clit. Whines and breathy moans leave your mouth as his fingers start to speed up. He can feel your legs start to clamp around his head and your walls start to tighten around his fingers. He curls his fingers inside of you, successfully hitting your g-spot repeatedly. Your hands tug on his long hair and he groans into your pussy.

“I know you’re close, I can feel it. Cum for me princess. Cum for daddy..” he cooed, watching as your eyes roll back and your back arch off the couch cushion. Your orgasm made your head spin, and you were mumbling all sorts of incoherent things without even realizing. Tom just smirks, knowing he’s no where near finished with you yet.

#tom kaulitz x reader #tom kaulitz #tom kaulitz smut #tokio hotel x reader #tokio hotel smut #tokio hotel #tokio hotel fanfic #tom kaulitz fanfic #kaulitz twins

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shroomsroom · 11 days

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hi, I was wondering if you could do a steve randle smut where the reader and him are best friends and work at the DX together but they are giving eachother the silent treatment that gets solved by smut. Sorry if it doesn't make sense

Summary: In which you tease Steve during a fight

Warnings: smut, semi-public smut, mean Dom Steve, no orgasm he is MEAN!!!

Author's Note: ive never seen so many steve requests im so excited!!

Maybe you did it on purpose. The childish argument leading you to wear the shortest skirt ever know the man and the tightest button up you had. If Steve was going to lecture you about giving guys your time of day and letting them stare at you, you'd certainly give them something to stare at. And it wasn't just random guys you were affecting either.

Steve seemed tense since the moment he saw you but you stuck your nose up and refused to talk to him. However, Steve was stubborn too so the DX was full of tense silence, all until you teasingly bent over right in front of him to grab something from the cabinet.

“Y/n, stop” He said, a sharp edge in his voice. You shoot him a look, acting unaware of what you were doing.

“Stop what? This is literally my job” you rolled your eyes and Steve stepped up to you.

“Don't get an attitude, you know what you were doing, wearing this short skirt and bending over for the whole world to see.” He glared at you, arms caging you against the cabinets.

“Well pardon me for wearing clothes. What do you want me to do, go to work naked?” You countered and Steve's eyes narrowed.

“Oh and excuse me for showing actual concern over your sorry ass!” He retorted.

“I just don't get it, Steve! Why do you care so much about other guys!” You shouted.

“Because I'm fucking jealous of them” he yelled back.

You stood there, shocked.

“Jealous?” He grumbled something low under his breath before sighing.

“Yeah, Y/n, I really like you. You-” before he can finish his sentence your lips are on his and he's pushing you up against the counter behind you. His hand finds its way to your ass, squeezing it before slowly tracing up your underwear to your core were a small patch of arousal was starting to form. Steve positioned you over the counter so your chest was pressed against it and your ass was against his hard-on.

“I'm going to fuck that little bratty attitude out of you, yeah?” He whispered, low and gravelly into your ear. You moaned, grinding up against him. He pushed your underwear to the side and immediately plunged his fingers into your hole, pornagraphic noises filling the empty car shop. Thankfully from where you were standing you could see anyone try to enter but they couldn't see you. Steve worked quickly to stretch you out but his impatience got the better of him and he quickly started working on his belt and pants.

You'd never seen his cock before, only hearing about it when gossiping girls passed you in the street, but God were they under-exaggerating. Every time you thought he'd bottomed out, he pushed in a little more. He filled you up so well that you were nearly crying, drooling over the table and your hands were white from their grip.

“Fuck, you're so tight” he groaned, his hand finding the space between your shoulder blades, pressing down slightly. His pace was damn near brutal, his only goal to fuck you braindead. You could only choke out a mixture of his name and praises as he abused your poor cunt.

“‘m clos-” your slurred speech abruptly stopped as Steve pulled out, you took a little to catch your breath before whipping your head around. “What the fuck, Steve!” He smiled, a glint of pure evil in his eyes, before patting your ass and pulling your underwear back up.

“let's see how long you can last like that"

#shroomsroom #the outsiders x reader #clara'sroom #steve randle x reader #steve randle x reader smut

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