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chocoholicannanymous · 3 years

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If the Spit Hits the Fan (Glee) Part XV

Follows pt I, pt II, pt III, pt IV, pt V, part VI, pt VII, part VIII, part IX, part X, part XI, part XII, part XIII and part XIV.

Being Sebastian's boyfriend really isn't that much different from being his friend. They do a lot of the same things, and talk about the same stuff, only now there's hand-holding and kissing and cuddling with it. Apart from the touching though? Nothing really changes much.

Which kind of makes it sound like how it was with Blaine.

It's not though.

Sebastian will hold his hand in the hallway without worrying about being seen. And yes, Dalton is different from McKinley – so, so much different, and safer – but Blaine even hesitated to hold Kurt's hand in the choir room, surrounded by friends.

Sebastian kisses him in a way that never leaves Kurt doubting there's attraction, and has to stop his hands from wandering too far on a regular basis – yet never making Kurt worry he won't stop.

Sebastian makes Kurt have to stop himself, both from allowing it and from doing his own wandering. They're still too new to go there, no matter how much Kurt's hormones sit up and beg every time Sebastian touches him. (They'll get there, Kurt's sure, just... Step by step, and not yet.)

Sebastian reaches out for Kurt without looking – sometimes seemingly without thinking – to pull him close, and always makes a space for him.

And when Sebastian sings, it's with Kurt, or for him, not at him.

It's a far cry from scheduled make-outs and avoiding even PG13 levels of PDA and being made to feel like his boyfriend is more interested in his own hand than in Kurt.

It's amazing.

There's a rainbow rose hanging on Kurt's door on Valentine's day. He and Sebastian have been dating for two days – a day and a half, if he was to be picky – and Kurt knows from last year's insanity that there's not a flower shop within two hours of Vesterville that carries rainbow roses. They have to be ordered special, and with a lot more warning than two days.

Kurt's not the least bit ashamed about how he squeals, or how he turns on his heel and kisses his boyfriend (!) for long enough to be a little dizzy afterwards.

This isn't to say that Sebastian is a perfect boyfriend. He's not. Then again, neither is Kurt. He's working from romantic movies and the examples from the New directions, and of course from his time with Blaine. Neither is a good road map. Romantic movies have so many flaws Kurt don't really want to examine, and a lot of his favorites are set too far back in time to be useful as guidelines. The loves lives of his old glee mates are...well. They're flawed too, when seen without rose-colored glasses and envy.

As for his relationship with Blaine... Even if he's not counting how it ended that relationship was so very less than perfect, and honestly it was both their faults. Kurt's not without blame, he knows that and can admit it without somehow pretending what Blaine did wrong never happened.

So he's trying to learn from his mistakes, and other people's mistakes, and he does his best to communicate with Sebastian – who does the same in return.

Also, no one can say that they don't argue. They definitely do. They have from the beginning, and they're both opinionated passionate people, so why should they stop now? Their relationship has changed – they themselves haven't.

It's just that they manage to argue in a way that works. That doesn't makes Kurt pull out his claws to eviscerate Sebastian, that doesn't scare Kurt, or make him give in to “preserve the peace”. That, right there, was one of the things that had sent his relationship with Blaine down the wrong turn. When he'd first told his dad that he'd begun dating Blaine Burt Hummel had told him never to go to bed angry with his partner. He'd meant to sort out arguments and disagreements, but Kurt had interpreted it as needing to back down and push down his anger or hurt. With Sebastian he doesn't.

They argue, because that's who – and how – they are, but they do it in as mature and healthy way as they are able to, being teenagers. And they apologize if they step over the line. Not Kurt apologizes, regardless, with Sebastian pouting until he does, but both of them.

If Kurt had to, he'd call it damned near perfect. Instead he'll just say it's good, and he's happy.

That's never something to look down on.

The week of Regionals is weird. Kurt's never felt as prepared or as calm with a competition approaching, which is rather telling. The rest of the Warblers are a different story though. Kurt has made it clear that his primary goal is to beat the Troubletones, and his friends are feeling the pressure. They even ask if Kurt and Sebastian won't reconsider singing 'Human Nature'.

“Look, guys, I'm honored, really, that you would trust me, us like that. But I want to win more than I want that solo. And even if we ignore the fact that Ohio doesn't seem ready for a gay duet, I really do think the setlist we have is stronger as is. The Troubletones have a great presence, and both Mercedes and Santana are awesomely talented. However, everything about the Troubletones are built around them. The rest of the girls are background and dancing. If we go on with a number that's the same they are going to win, for no other reason than that most people find girls prettier and nicer to look at.

“But if we go on as an actual choir, for a show choir competition? We'll win. I'm sure of it. We've worked so hard with our songs, and I wouldn't change a thing about our setlist.”

And it's true. They have an amazing setlist, and everything flows in a way that makes Kurt feel practically professional, and he's not giving that – and its chance to win – up to stare longingly at Sebastian while singing a song that exposes them to the core.

No. Kurt's going to have quite a lot more time in the spotlight than he'd expected when turning down a proper solo. He's going to sing with his friends, and his boyfriend, and he's going to show McKinley what it means to be a team onstage.

The Troubletones are just as amazing onstage as Kurt thought. They've done a good job picking their songs, and Mercedes still has the best voice he's ever heard live. Santana's not quite as talented, but give her the right song – which these are – and she'll blow your mind. Their choreography showcases the girls poached from the Cheerios without making Mercedes look too far behind, and their clothes look good.

Kurt would vote for them any day, even with Rachel being given a place in the background, except this one. This is going to be his day. He meets Sebastians eyes as they line up and nods.

Showtime.

'I want You Back' does exactly what it's meant to, namely getting the audience in a party mood. As the last notes flows into the first from 'Man in the Mirror' the mood shifts and Kurt feels his own shift with it. His solo feels a little raw, because in no way can he sing those lines without being reminded of all the crap he's gone through over the past 6 months.

“...a willow deeply scared, somebody's broken heart and a washed out dream...”

Well. His heart might have been broken, and his dreams about Blaine did wash out. But he's got new dreams, and his hearts healed, and no matter the scars he's whole where it matters. And even if he wasn't? He's looking in the mirror, and he's changing.

They bring the party back with their last song, giving their all transforming the sounds of 'Beat It' to sounds that can be reproduced by the human throat. The dancing is the most demanding Kurt's ever done onstage, and he knows he will definitely be beat after. But they look and sound awesome, and that's all that matters.

Or maybe not, he ruefully thinks as he sees Finn on his feet, jumping up and down and whooping as the Warblers are proclaimed the winners and Rachel looks like she's been pelted with eggs again.

“You stole our songs!”

Of course. All Kurt wants to do is get on the bus, go back to Dalton and celebrate. Okay, shower, then celebrate. So naturally Rachel is waiting to ambush him. Well, that's not going to go the way she's probably thinking.

“Really? Really Rachel, you're going there? You know very well that we didn't steal anything. Oh, I know that there was a suggestion that the New Directions do Michael for Sectionals, but I also know that you were the one who refused to accept it.

“You really blew it there. Michael is a great choice for Sectionals or Regionals, what with the Ohio mindset, and I'm pretty sure you would have won with the setlist the guys suggested. I'm not surprised you put a stop to it though.”

Rachel draws back, looking first shocked, then insulted, then finally like an angry goose, complete with hissing sound. He's not letting it touch him though, lets it run over him, one might say, like water over a goose.

“There are no songs in Michael Jacksons discography that's a given for you, no certainty that you'll be featured. And in the end, that's what mattered, wasn't it? Not that the New Directions won, but that you won. You wanted to beat the Troubletones, didn't you? Wanted to show that you were better than Mercedes, wanted to prove that her beating you when auditioning for Maria was just a fluke. Wanted to prove what everyone knows, that's she's every bit as good as you, and sometimes better, is wrong.

“Well, congratulations. You got what you wanted in terms of the setlist and the spotlight, but you fucked up everything else. And not just for you, but for everyone.”

An expression of pain flies across Rachel's face, and he pushes the knife in a little bit further.

“We weren't as blind though. The minute Finn told me about the Michael setlist I knew it was a winner. As did the other Warblers. I asked Finn first, and Sam and Puck. They didn't think we needed their permission, as you didn't use the songs, but they gave it any way.”

Kurt looks at Rachel, looks at the way she's still fuming, still refusing to see any other side than her own. It won't matter what he says – she'll keep ignoring any and all arguments against her. Once he might have tried harder to make her understand, but as things are he just wants to leave. His boyfriend's waiting and that makes Kurt out of time to spend on his former friend.

“Your loss, our gain.”

He starts to leave, but thinks better of it. He's got one more jab in him.

“Oh, and Rachel? Don't worry. Going to Nationals is a privilege, and we won't waste it. We've already gotten started on a setlist.”

It's petty, but. So's she.

That evening the Warblers celebrate as thoroughly as a bunch of uniformed boys in a well-staffed boarding school can. This means that it's late when Kurt drags Sebastian to his room (unlike him Sebastian's in a single), but neither of them is under the influence of anything but happiness.

That's important to Kurt as they tumble into Sebastian's bed while kissing, because he doesn't want there to be any doubt in Sebastian's mind that when Kurt pulls off his shirt and then goes for his fly it's because he wants to.

Having Sebastian stop him is frustrating, to say the very least.

“Hey, what are you doing?”

It's only the fact that it's Sebastian, and that he's shown himself trustworthy in so many ways over the past months that stops Kurt from storming out.

“I thought we... You know?”

It's so hard to say, to open himself up like this, years of being told he's a predator, or ugly, or plain wrong getting just as much in his way as the fact that he's never done this, and the only time he's been even close wasn't even about him.

Apparently he's going to have to use his words regardless, because Sebastian's not taking the opening.

“I thought we could have sex.” There. Words. Consent. Door wide open.

And yet Sebastian's still not taking the opening.

“What's the hurry?”

Kurt pulls back a little, hurt blooming.

“No, no, don't. Talk to me, okay? I'm a bit surprised I guess. We haven't even been dating for two months yet, and I know this is new for you.”

“So? It's not like I'm waiting for marriage.”

Kurt knows he sounds a bit snippy, and he has sort of been waiting – not for marriage, but for something, some feeling of more. He's got that feeling with Sebastian, so what's the point of waiting any longer? Everyone else his age (or so it feels) is having sex so why can't he?

Some of it must bleed through because Sebastian gets that “aha” look, and nods a bit.

“Look, regardless of what I might have said or implied when chasing Blaine, I'm actually not the whore of Babylon. I have, however, rounded a few bases and enjoyed them. I think you'd enjoy them too, and I would love to find out first hand. But that doesn't have to mean we go straight to fucking.” Kurt blushes, because he might be ready to do it, but those words...

“So. I'm not going to push, and I'm not going to rush. I am more than interested though, I'm just happy to take it a bit slow. To build up to every step. As far as I'm concerned you've earned that.”

Sebastian's looking so earnest it kills Kurt annoyance, and then lightning-quick it's replaced by a vicked look than makes him shiver all over.

“I wouldn't mind showing you the first of many, many bases now though. How about it, babe?”

Kurt doesn't mind either, neither then nor the next day.

#chocoholic fics #kurt fic #kurt hummel #sebastian smythe #a wild sebastian appears #kurtbastian

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wormmomma · 4 years

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MIDSOMMAR SPOILER REVIEW: this movie fucking broke me

CW:RAPE, ABUSE, PEDOPHILLIA

“Midsommar” is a grimm fairytale of sorts. A fairly different homage to the cult film the “wicker man”. “The wicker man” is about a european cult being investigated by a british christian cop, “midsommar” avoids the christian indictment of pagan/occult religious practices. midsommar attempts to be an out and out horror film unlike the a genre bending murder mystery/horror/thriller roots of “The wicker man”. Director ari aster obviously wanted to add to the annals of folk horror by creating an ambitious beautifully horrific and sometimes downright psychedelic film. Ari aster wanted to make a film where you can’t hide from the horror as it all happens in front of you. It's also a breakup movie for some reason? As someone who has seen the theatrical cut twice and the director's cut once I can assure you it misses the mark when taking both concepts. If you're wondering whether not to watch the film i think that on a technical level “midsommar” is beautiful and has amazing cinematography, but the answer is yes, but no. Jordan Peele was shown an advance copy of the film and told Aster "I think you’ve made the most idyllic horror film of all time" that high praise. But that being said for personal reasons this will be my final time seeing the film. I think the director's cut is a gorgeous and amazing three hour film. But as someone personally affected by rape, pedophillia, and the victimization mentally or physically handicapped people i cant reccomend this film wholeheartedly. I'm far from squeamish and love films that revel in shock, horror and extremity but I cannot in good conscious recommend a film I almost walked out on. I think Ari Aster has backpedaled immensely in his ability to create horror that exhibits empathy for his characters and the triumphs and tragedies that he subjects them too. “Hereditary” had an amount of emotional pathos for its characters that was almost completely removed from “Midsomer”. The fim feels unreasonably cruel even for a horror movie. Although enjoyable, proceed with caution “Midsommar” is a beautiful, slow, horrific but ultimately controversial mess of a film. 8/10

(the rest of this review is a plot synopsis and a meditation on the more controversial passages in the movie and is to be read for those who have actually seen midsommar. Spoilers abound!)

So what’s it about?

Midsommar is about Dani, an anxious and vulnerable young woman dating an emotionally abusive and reserved boyfriend named christian. After her bipolar sister commits suicide and murders both there parents, Dani goes on a european excursion with cristian with his anthropologist friends as they study a swedish cults midsommar summer solstice tradition. Dani reeling not only from having her parents taken from her by their favorite child, but also from the lack of any real emotional support goes on a gorgeous, psychedelia, induced nightmare of the cult horror variety. Immediately after touching down on the swedish cult's beautiful grassy commune christian manipulates dani into taking psychedelics. Christian although quite emotionally stunted and quite meek at his core is very sly and amazing at working people. Watching Christian make Dani do psychedelic drugs (mushrooms i believe) to make her clear refusal to take them into something that not only affects christian but also his friends and everyone around them is almost scary in its hilariously methodical toxicity. This leads to dani having a panic attack and from there the hits just keep on coming. Dani then has to watch as two cultist commit ritual suicide. This traumatic incident further escalated when one jumped off the mountain on his leg and needed to have his head crushed by cult members till it turns to meat and dust. To make a long three hour story with icelandic pacing short lets race to the finish line:

Christian begins to be pursued by a cult member named maja. Dani still reeling from seeing two people commit suicide has her worries invalidated by christian and all of his anthropologist bros. The anthropology bro argues about who deserves to break basically every rule of basic anthropology as they try to see who gets PAID for perverting a culture they were invited to study not disturb. Christian eats one of majas pubes. After pissing on a ceremonial tree for the dead, and taking photos of the forbidden religious text (written by an inbred autistic oracle boy) our two american secondary characters are chopped off. Dani and christian are the final outsiders left standing. Dani joins a dance competition (yes really) and becomes this year's may queen. forever to be immortalized in the annals of white female faces shown in portraits plastered in the sleeping quarters of this matriarchal cult commune. Christian is then raped as we discover how all the bodies of our other character are disposed of. Dani, inebriated and vulnerable, discovers christian being raped by the cult and forced to sleep with the 16 year old maja. Disgusted dani vomits and syncs her cries of pain with the cult sister and finally has her trauma validated. She is given the choice to then murder christian as hes trapped in a paralyzed state. Dani decides to burn christian alive in the body of a bear, finally defeating and overcoming her emotional abuser. Dani smiles as the cult writhes in pain from the death of the cult members burning alive with christian.Dani is happy. She has family. She is home.

So lets (finally) talk about maja

“Look at it from an academic perspective it would provide a unique glimpse into our sexual rights.”

“Can i not have a unique glimpse without participating?”

This is a conversation that is awkwardly cut from the theatrical version of midsommar. Christian is being offered to have sex with maja. Maja is a sixteen year old girl. The closest aster ever comes to revealing this fact is offhandedly mentioning maja having her first period. Christian refuses sex and is raped by maja, and the cult while a fourteen year old disabled child watches. There's a lot wrong with this scene. I’ll be honest for personal reasons I was really disgusted by this scene. I feel like im projecting but rape and pedophellia are really delicate topics and should be treated sensitivity. Ive seen alot of extreme very difficult horror films, i've seen rape, pedophillia, and violence explored in meaningful interesting and empathetic ways even ari asters own work like “meet the johnsons”. But watching maja rape christian with what i would assume are her older siblings, aunts, grandmothers, mother and other cult members as a 14 year old boy watches just made me feel fucking dirty. The weird part: it isn't horrific. While cristian was being raped, the audience I was watching it with were laughing. It wasn't scary. it was funny. It's a cognitive dissonance. The audience isn't aware of christians being raped or majas age. Most people assume he's cheating and deserves to be burned alive by dani. Making christian the bad guy of his own a rape is horrific but i shouldn’t need to hunt down that information and watch the film three times to understand that. It makes the movie feel as if its really bad at relaying basic information, at worst it's dishonestly hiding it to make the film more palatable. After putting all the pieces together I was disgusted. Ari aster crossed a line. I felt queasy and never wanted to see this film ever again. The fact ari aster could have made maja of age, or take the disabled 14 year old out the scene entirely, or not have had christian be raped in the first place while reaching a more understandable and tragic ending annoys me to know end, it feel like i watched these characters be used and mistreated for no reason. Just to shock me. It lacks value, it’s gross and uninteresting. much like christian and everyone involved i feel violated and it's really hard for me to enjoy watching what is an otherwise (although flawed) very interesting and compelling work or art. I’m still morbidly curious of the next film ari aster makes but i really hope he learns for this mistake and doesn't objectify children in another weird fetishistic male rape comedy routine. It just leaves me confused, disgusted and only makes it more challenging to analyze the more interesting implications of the film. I really appreciated hereditary as someone who has a very emotionally abusive family and has a very hard time processing death. I found hereditary horrific as it is cathartic. As someone who had to quite recently confront a pedophile, midsommar just left me hurt, and trapped. I was reliving some of the worst parts of my trauma as an audience sits around and laughs at it. It all felt so tragic and meaningless. I want to actually give ari asters work an honest critique but he's produced the only work of film that really hurt me and left me feeling violated. I really love his work and I know I'm exaggerating but I hope art never has such a negative effect on my mental health or anyone else’s ever again. I don't blame Maja or christian or the actor who portrayed them. I respect their performances although I have zero respect for how utterly tasteless midsommar ended up being for me. I think I need to learn how not to take art so seriously and try not to invest myself in other people's work. It's a difficult habit to kick. Needless to say, I cannot recommend this movie. If you're able to separate art from the artist and read this whole review without watching the film you're not a bad person for watching it, midsommar is a compelling, difficult experience.

I hope you enjoyed this review and I'm sorry if it got wayyy too personal in the end there. The movie clearly struck a raw nerve for me. if you enjoy this or any review i've dones let me know. I may reveiw hereditary in the future.if your also having issues with death, rape, abuse or mental health i hope this review didnt make it worse. Everyone is deserving of love, family, community and I hope everyone can find that. Have a good day, and have a safe quarantine.

#movie #reveiw #horror #cults #ari aster #midsommer spoilers #midso #midsommer #film #jordan peele #bear #analysis #critque #hot take #problematic

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fics-of-my-mind · 4 years

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Trust - Chapter IV.

'I mean...,' I bit my bottom lip, thinking about my next words. 'You definitely seem like someone who would lay a girl over your lap when something wasn't going your way.'

I could see him sharply inhale as an effect of my words. I was satisfied with the reaction.

'What else do you think I'd do to her?' he asked in a slightly rougher voice. He was keeping his cool, no expression on his face. I could feel my blush returning, but I didn't care anymore.

'Mark her skin.'

'Define.' It was more of an order than a request and I didn't even think about refusing to answer. I started feeling really hot between my legs and fidgeting wasn't helping anymore.

'Your palm prints would show on her ass. Love bites on her neck and collarbone. Maybe even your fingertips on her hips if you are rough enough,' I said slowly, weighing every word. As embarrassed as I felt minutes earlier, now excitement and desire took over my mind. Nick seemed entertained, only a smug smile playing on his lips.

'Would I also pleasure her?' he asked with a dark glance, still not moving his eyes and not shifting in his seat at all.

'Of course. She'd have no reason to be unsatisfied.'

Warnings: mature content, BDSM content Pairing: Nick Jonas / Other Female Character This fanfiction can also be found on Wattpad by fnntth

I don’t own Nick Jonas or any other recognizable characters. This fanfiction is completely fictional, its only purpose is entertainment.

Chapter IV. - Yeah tonight, I’m gonna fly

Nick’s texts are bold

Milla’s texts are italic

what are you doing?

It's Saturday

so Netflix? :D

Netflix

Ever since the first time he texted me, about two or three weeks ago, we've been constantly texting. It was nice, having someone to talk to all the time. Due to the 9 hour time difference between us, we weren't in sync at all. Most of the times I was already working while he was asleep and when he went to bed at night, I was already up, ready to start my day.

It was weird, a little bit hard to get used to, but still worth it. During the weeks I got to know little things about him, like in fact, he ate an omelet with feta cheese and spinach almost every day, that he liked to work out in the mornings rather than in the evenings, that he talked to his brothers every few days and he sometimes spent long hours without getting out of his home studio.

We talked about everything. Our likes, dislikes, families, jobs, dogs, our favorite Netflix movies or series, food, drinks, plus every random thing we'd find on the internet. The only thing that never made it into the conversation was Priyanka, which bothered me less than it should've. I've been home for weeks now, completely alone, only leaving the apartment for dog walks and for going to grocery shopping. The Face Time and Teams calls, as good as they were, never made up for the lack of human contact.

Talking to Nick took my mind of it almost completely. He's called me a couple of times, usually from his home studio – I guess that was where his wife would never bother him -, and we've spent hours talking about everything and nothing. On our third talk I've realized that I couldn't refer to him anymore as a complete stranger – I've shared things with him that I wasn't even comfortable sharing with my best friends.

I felt so free talking to him, letting go of my inhibitions and of the fear of the conversation turning awkward. I never really felt like this about anyone, and honestly the thought of Nick being the person who knew about my thoughts on the deepest level made me feel like I was in some ridiculous fanfiction. Things like this didn't happen in real life. They just didn't.

Maybe the knowledge that probably we weren't ever going to see each other again made me open up to him. Maybe the fact that he was married and there was no chance for my teenage girl fantasies to come true, made me act naturally around him. Whatever it was, it took my thoughts off of the quarantine and the current situation and I couldn't be more grateful.

I usually had this fear of being too much for the people around me. When I liked someone – as a friend -, I really loved them. I was the kind of person, who only had a few close friends, but would do anything for them. When I was thinking about those few people closest to me, there was nothing I wouldn't have done for them. I wanted to know about their lives, hang out with them and not being involved in something usually made me sad. And I was always afraid that this quality of mine would throw some people off, they'd thing I'm just too much, that I'm trying too hard.

So, I tried to keep it cool with Nick. Usually he was the one calling me and we'd only start up a conversation when he'd send the first text. After that we'd keep texting constantly, but since he was, well, Nick Jonas and he was the married one, I was careful. I didn't want to text him at the wrong time or call him when Priyanka was around. I mean, who would be happy if their husband kept texting some unknown girl...

how 'bout a call tonight?

haven't heard your voice for days

When he said things like this, my heart would usually start to race. Even though my brain was aware that there was a 0.0001 chance of anything ever happening between us, he was still one of the first few guys in my life that'd write something like this. I didn't mind it. It's been a while since I've had a crush on anyone, and who would be more perfect for this role than Nick? I've had a crush on him for the greater part of my life anyway.

Okay.

What time?

around 10ish?

My time or your time?

your night, my afternoon :)

Okay. :)

At the first time, I was so nervous when he has announced that he was going to call me. You see, I was someone who always found something to worry about. I was a mess. Then, into a few minutes of the conversation all of my concerns were gone. He's just had that effect on me, his voice was like a sedative for my nerves.

When I shared this with him, he's gotten used to calling me unannounced, not leaving lime for me to worry. It was better, and I've started truly appreciating it just now when my mind was all around the place again. He's left me about three hours to worry about nothing.

I tried calming my nerves with some series binge-watching, and the turning to my all-time favorite relaxing activity, my face care routine. I've cleaned, scrubbed, moisturized my face and the I threw up a face mask. It wasn't very effective, didn't make me any calmer but at least my skin looked flawless.

By 10 PM I was sitting on my couch, wearing some black yoga pants and a black top with only some sports bra. My hair was still slightly wet from my shower and I was wrapping myself up in my Harry Potter blanket when Nick called. On FaceTime.

Now, I was worried about all of the things that could go wrong during our call, like Priyanka walking on, or me saying something I shouldn't have said. Never has it ever cross my mind that Nick would just casually FaceTime me.

On normal days, I was wearing makeup. I was working for a beauty company, on a makeup brand, so any time my face was natural, I felt like something was missing, therefore I wasn't as confident as otherwise. Now there was nothing on my skin, except for some lip balm and I felt like panicking.

Not that the fact that Nick was FaceTiming me wasn't enough reason for panicking. I haven't seen his face for more than a month now – well, except on YouTube videos and on Instagram – and as much as I was looking forward to it, I was also anxious.

just answer it!

don't overthink it please

I looked at his text, and kind of hated the fact that he got to know me so well in mere weeks that he knew what was going on in my head. I so wanted to decline and call him back in a regular call, but somehow I could feel the authority in his text and decided that it wouldn't lead anywhere, he'd just call me back on FaceTime. After a deep breath hit the 'accept' button on my MacBook.

'You didn't mention anything about FaceTime,' I said with displeasure as soon as his handsome face showed up on my screen. God, I've missed seeing it.

'Thought I'd surprise you,' he shrugged, but there was a smug smile on his face. 'Hello Beautiful.'

'I don't like surprises,' I rolled my eyes. I didn't feel beautiful, not without makeup and in my home clothes, but Nick didn't seem to mind my outfit as he examined my face.

'Sush, you love them. Especially if the surprise includes me,' he said, all cheeky.

'Nick...'

'I just thought,' he started a bit more seriously. 'That we haven't been face to face since we've met. And it was time.' His face was honest, like he really wanted to see me. I bit my lips, thinking of a proper answer. 'I just love seeing your reactions,' he added, which made me roll my eyes again and earn another chuckle from him.

'Aren't you afraid that your wife will walk in and see you FaceTime another woman?' I asked the question, making his face lose the smile and the ease. I didn't want to ruin his mood, I was just worried. It wouldn't lead to anything good if Priyanka walked in the room and realized that Nick was talking to someone.

He pressed his lips together in a thin line and frowned. For a few seconds he didn't say anything, which made the anxiety in me rise.

'No,' he said slowly, wetting his lips with his tongue, which made me feel funny in my stomach. My reactions to him were ridiculous. 'Pri isn't home, she went to see a friend.'

'And what if she comes home?'

'I don't want to talk about her, Milla' he replied, putting the emphasis on my name. I didn't want to let it go, I knew that I couldn't let the worry go away completely if he wasn't a 100% sure that he was alone. He wasn't even in his music studio like when we usually talked, but somewhere which seemed like a living room. I opened my mouth, but he shot me up before I could say anything else. 'Milla.' My name sounded like a warning from his mouth and I couldn't help but nod.

Nobody has ever had an effect like this on me. I couldn't quite place it. Usually I was independent and stubborn, and wouldn't drop something that I wanted to talk about like this. But when Nick said, no, commanded that I let it go, I – almost – instantly obliged. It was honestly scary and it wasn't just about me being afraid that he will get tired of me. It was something else.

'Okay,' I agreed to his request, for whatever reason trusting that he knew when his wife would be home and trying to let go of the fear of her walking in. It wasn't a good feeling, I felt like a dirty little secret, even when we weren't doing more than talking.

'Good,' he nodded, satisfied with my answer. 'So I have a new neighbor.'

'Really?' I rolled my eyes. 'Of course, in Hollywood what would be a better program during quarantine than real-estate buying?' I said with much irony.

Sometimes Nick told me stories about the rich and famous acquaintances he had, and most of the times he'd laugh with me about the craziness. As rich as he himself was, he could still laugh at the crazy rich, like the Kardashians. It was surreal, hearing real life stories about people that I've only known before from Instagram and the celebrity news websites.

'You can laugh all you want, but people have time now to actually see some offers for real, and not just buy something that their agent recommends' he said.

'You're also buying a new house, aren't you?' I asked, suspicious about his answer. He ran his hand through the hair on the back of his head.

'I've been looking at some listings. Real-estate is always a great investment,' he shrugged. 'By the way, it's Encino, not Hollywood,' he corrected.

'Well, it's still LA, isn't it?'

'Yeah,' Nick nodded. 'So aren't you curious about my new neighbor?'

'Should I?' I asked, amused about his irritation for my lack of curiosity. Of course, I was curious, especially if he thought it'd be interesting. 'Who is it?'

'It's the guy who played in Fifty Shades of Grey,' he announced.

'Mr. Grey? Oh my God,' I grinned. I loved him probably much more than I loved the movie, since it was awful. When I first read the books, they weren't too bad though.

'Well, he usually goes by Jamie, but sure,' he chuckled.

'And will he move in, or is it just an investment?'

'I ran into him yesterday, he said he'll keep it as a holiday home.'

'I wonder if there is an RROP in it,' I said, only realizing what had just slipped my mouth when it was already out. I instantly covered my mouth, trying to take it back, even though it was only meant as a joke. Nick looked at me with a confused expression on his face.

'RROP?' he asked, and the tingling in my stomach has gotten worse instantly. Hearing him say the letters made me want to crawl out of my skin. I instantly regretted that Fifty Shades used to be a thing that I've fangirled about. 'What is that short for?'

'Nothing,' I replied quickly. I could feel the heat crawling up to my face.

'It's clearly not nothing. You're blushing,' he stated, and I had to run my palm through my face in embarrassment. Truth is, he was pretty good at making me blush, though he's never seen it through the phone. Now he could see everything on my face. 'C'mon, Milla.'

'Will you just drop it, please?' I asked in a small voice. I really felt embarrassed and he really enjoyed it, as the smirk on his face revealed.

'Nope,' he said, popping the 'P'. I groaned in frustration and covered my face in my palms.

'RROP stands for Red Room of Pain.'

After I said the words, it was quiet for way too long. I didn't dare to look up into the camera, and even if I was dying to see his expression and try to get a read on his face, I was way too embarrassed. This wasn't something you'd just bring up in a conversation like this, and even if we could've just let this topic go, I had a feeling that Nick had something else on his mind.

It both scared and excited me.

We've already touched on this topic, when back in Barcelona I called him dominant. He neither refused nor confirm it back then, but ever since we've been talking, he had some tells. I was quite sure now that he was, in fact dominating, just as I was sure that he knew what a Red Room of Pain was and I didn't have to go into details. Hell, maybe he's already been in one. Maybe he had his own in that mansion he was living in.

'Now why couldn't you tell me that?' he asked eventually, making me let my arms drop and looking back at the screen. He looked at me with an expressionless face, but I could sense the intrigue radiating off him, even through the screen.

'Well,' I started, licking my bottom lip. 'Because it's embarrassing.'

'Thinking about things that interest you?' he asked in his deep voice. 'I mean, from that heated reaction it's quite obvious that you're interested,' he added.

Honestly, I was interested in this. I think Fifty Shades was the thing that made me dive deeper into the BDSM world, to read about it, learn about it. It excited me, and even though I've never tried anything, it was a constantly part of my daydreams. Well, my daydreams in connection with sex.

'No, not thinking about them,' I shook my head. It was easy to open up to Nick about a lot of things, but this was different. This was something that I've only had a real conversation about in my mind. 'Talking about them is different though.'

'I want you to feel free to talk about anything with me. I thought we are over this,' he said frowning. He wasn't happy with my answer, I could tell. There was something in his eyes that I couldn't identify.

'We are, but this... It's not something I feel comfortable talking about with anyone,' I sighed, quite frustrated with this topic. I never expected the conversation to turn like this, but I could only blame myself. Well, and Nick for not letting it go.

'What? Sex?' he asked, raising his eyebrows, and as he said the word 'sex', I shifted in my position, feeling uncomfortable.

'Yes. It's just not something I go around talking about with everyone,' I shrugged. Nick looked at me for a long minute, with a gaze so deep as if he could see into my soul. I fidgeted again.

'No,' he shook his head. 'You don't talk about this with anyone. You've never talked about sex with anyone,' he said slowly, still shaking his head. I hated when he analyzed me.

'Nick.'

'I know you never had a long-term boyfriend, but not even with your sexual partners? Friends? No one?' he asked, and suddenly I was feeling like he was judging me. I didn't like this.

'I'm not a prude, Nick,' I said. I really wasn't. I mean, I don't really think any prude would be interested in BDSM.

'I know that,' he nodded, raising his hand apologetically. 'I didn't mean to be insensitive.'

I sighed. I know he didn't mean it, but this whole conversation was making me uncomfortable, yet excited. This was probably the first thing I felt weird talking about with him, but then again, it would've been uncomfortable with anyone else. Probably even more so...

'Of course I talked about sex with my friends,' I said eventually, giving in. His face was way too remorseful, and I didn't want him to feel sorry about bringing up a topic which was natural. Especially since I am the one that accidentally brought it up. 'But not about my deepest interests. We aren't that kind of friends that just share these things.'

'Do you think we can be the kind of friends that do share these things?' he asked with genuine interest on his face.

'Why do you want to talk about this so much?' I asked, wanting to understand his motives. It's one thing that I've had no one to talk about it with, but him... He was married for God's sake.

'Because I'm interested in whatever is going on in your head.'

'Why?'

'You fascinate me,' he shrugged. I looked at him with my mouth open. Fascinate. I don't think that was a word that anyone has ever said about me. Especially not to my face. 'Your reactions are really something else.'

I hummed, trying to process his honesty. I had no idea what we were doing, where this was heading to. But seeing the look on his face, I didn't want to shot him down, I didn't want to disappoint him.

'Okay, it interests me,' I admitted, jumping back to the original topic.

'Sex, or...?' he asked hesitantly, clearly not wanting to push me.

'BDSM.'

'See, that wasn't so hard, was it?' he chuckled smugly.

'But I think, it also interests you,' I added. I just hoped that I was in fact right and wasn't heading towards another great embarrassment.

'What makes you think that?' he asked, raising his eyebrows, but there was a smirk on his lips.

'I already told you Nick, you're a dominant little fuck. It shows,' I shrugged, with a smile in the corner of my mouth.

'Am I really?' He was smug, never moving his gaze from mine. It was a dangerous game, guessing. Somehow I felt like I was right. I also felt like he wasn't just going to admit it, but suddenly, talking about this with him, I had to know. So I had to find another way.

'I mean...,' I bit my bottom lip, thinking about my next words. 'You definitely seem like someone who would lay a girl over your lap when something wasn't going your way.'

I could see him sharply inhale as an effect of my words. I was satisfied with the reaction.

'What else do you think I'd do to her?' he asked in a slightly rougher voice. He was keeping his cool, no expression on his face. I could feel my blush returning, but I didn't care anymore.

'Mark her skin.'

'Define.' It was more of an order than a request and I didn't even think about refusing to answer. I started feeling really hot between my legs and fidgeting wasn't helping anymore.

'Would I also pleasure her?' he asked with a dark glance, still not moving his eyes and not shifting in his seat at all.

'Of course. She'd have no reason to be unsatisfied.'

'Elaborate.' Came the next command. I rolled my eyes. 'Don't roll your eyes at me!' His voice was still calm but it had a hidden edge that made me quail.

'Sorry,' I said, wetting my lips. His glance moved to my lips, then back to my eyes. 'I think you'd make her wait, torture her, refusing to kiss her where she wants you the most.'

'Where is that?' he asked, and I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes at him again. Of course, he was going to make me say it out loud.

'On her clit.'

'Would I only use my tongue?'

'At first,' I nodded, feeling very hot in my clothes. I'm sure that my panties were already soaked with my wetness. 'Then you'd add a finger. Then one more. Probably a third one.'

'Would I also pay attention to her breasts?'

'I guess,' I shrugged. Honestly, I have no idea. Boobs have never really been a big turn on for me, but I guess for some people they are. 'And she would also pleasure you.'

'How so?'

'She quite likes to give blowjobs. She would lick you, then try to swallow you.'

'Do you think she can fit me into her mouth?' he asked smugly.

'No way,' I chuckled. 'We've all seen that photoshoot, Nicholas.'

'Would she want me to help?' Came the next question. I needed friction, I needed to move my hand closer to my heat, but I couldn't risk him noticing. We were just talking after all, it would've been super weird.

'Would she want you to fuck her mouth?' I asked with a dry mouth. We were talking about 'her', but we both knew we were talking about me. He nodded, swallowing. 'Yes.'

'How do you think I'd take her?' he asked, his voice now even deeper and slightly hoarse. It made me feel even hotter.

'Up against the wall,' I bit my lip hard as I closed my eyes and imagined the scene before me. This, I was good at, daydreaming, imagining scenes that haven't happened. 'Then however you can access her the best.'

'Would I be rough?' I swallowed at his question.

'Yes. She'd want you not to hold back.'

'Then she doesn't know what she's up against,' he said in his deep voice. 'Eyes on me, Milla.' I opened my eyes, only to see him leaning closer to the monitor. I couldn't see him past his chest region, but there was no way he didn't have a reaction. 'Do you think I'd let her be on top?'

'Perhaps,' I said, biting my lip. 'So she could sink down on you and you can completely fill her up.' I knew my face was red like a tomato, but I didn't care. 'But you'd still have all the control.'

'How would I make her come?' he asked, now breathing a little bit heavier.

'You'd make her come multiple times. With you inside of her, so you could feel her walls pulsating.' Thank God for all of those smutty fanfictions I've read, which provided me with the vocabulary, so I could perfectly express my thoughts to him. 'You'd pull her hair and play with her clit, you'd bite on her shoulder, slap her ass creating friction.'

'Would she be able to come with me?'

'If you get her on edge again, sure.' I resisted the urge to close my eyes again, rather I concentrated on the man on my screen. 'So am I right?' I asked.

'About what?'

'About you being dominant.' He licked his lips before answering, and I really really wanted to touch myself at that.

'I do like control,' he nodded. I was right, wow. I grinned at him and he ran his hand through his stubble. 'How wet are you right now?'

'Nick!' I gasped. This was something I didn't expect. We have been talking about an imaginative 'she' up until now after all.

'How wet?' he repeated, not seeming amused about my modesty anymore. He expected an answer and I've never felt this embarrassed in my life. 'Milla,' he said my name impatiently.

'Wet,' I said, dropping my glance to my lap. I couldn't help it, I just wasn't this confident person who felt comfortable talking about this face to face.

'Are your panties dripping?' he asked, and I looked up at him with shock on my face. 'I want you to check.' Our gazes connected and as much as I wanted to deny his order, something in me didn't let me. I dipped between my legs.

'I can feel my wetness through my yoga pants,' I said quietly, almost whispering.

'Good,' he replied smugly. 'I want you to think about the scene we've just played through when you touch yourself tonight,' he said.

Before I could reply anything in my shock, he disconnected the call.

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fuzz1912 · 3 years

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This is the Way

Just prior to the release of the third movie of Disney’s Star Wars trilogy, I posted some thoughts to the effect that I no longer had the energy to write at length about what Star Wars had become under their watch, because I no longer had any love left to fuel that effort. THE MANDALORIAN has changed all that and, ever since then finale of its second season, I’ve been wanting to process and contextualise why it has been so impactful. The clearest place to start is the finale itself, and the sequence that has led adult fans across the world to revert to a child-like state of wonder and break down into tears. If you haven’t already seen THE MANDALORIAN, in particular “Chapter 16 - THE RESCUE” then please read no further - do yourself a favour and stay off the internet until you’ve caught yourself up. From here on, the spoilers will be rife.

A QUICK RECAP

The clues leading to the finale’s big reveal are staged in a masterfully accelerating fashion, leading to a crescendo of certainty that no amount of “subverted expectations” could extinguish. Imperial Moff Gideon has recaptured the Child (Grogu), and the Mandalorian (Din Djarin) has managed to locate him and threatened that he will stop at nothing to free his ward from Gideon’s clutches. We rejoin Mando and his allies (shock trooper Cara Dune, assassin Fennec Shand and her benefactor the infamous bounty hunter Boba Fett, and two survivors of the Mandalorian Death Watch in heiress Bo-Katan Kryze and Koska Reeves) as they chase an Imperial Lambda-class shuttle in Fett’s ship, Slave I. After a minor altercation with Imperial officers taunting Dune over the destruction of her home planet of Alderaan, they capture the Imperial scientist Pershing who, at Moff Gideon’s direction, has been using blood samples from the Child (Grogu) in cloning experiments that quite possibly may lead to the resurrection of the Emperor years later (ugh).

With Pershing’s help and Boba Fett creating a distraction, they use the shuttle to stage a boarding of Gideon’s cruiser. Mando searches for the Child while the others quickly take the bridge. First Mando has to deactivate the ominous Dark Troopers, one of whom escapes from cold storage before Mando is able to seal the others in. As the remaining Dark Troopers persistently continue to punch the doors, gradually wearing away at them, Mando engages in mortal combat against the escaped Dark Trooper. It is relentless and seemingly indestructible, a veritable terminator that keeps pounding away at Mando despite all of his tricks. Held by the scruff of his neck, the Dark Trooper keeps punching his helmet into a wall. Mando can only use his flamethrower and wrist launcher as mere distractions to get the Dark Trooper to release him, and it is only after he notices the Dark Trooper’s blaster shots deflecting off his beskar armour that he realises that a well-placed thrust of his beskar spear into the Dark Trooper’s weak neck will take out his foe. Moments before the remaining platoon is about to escape cold storage, Mando is able to vent them all into space.

Mando proceeds to the brig where he finds Moff Gideon holding the Child at the point of the infamous Mandalorian Darksaber. Gideon demands that Mando disarm himself, and warns Mando to assume that he knows everything and is in complete control. He describes the power of the Darksaber and the fact that it gives the one who wields it a claim to the Mandalorian throne. When Din surprises him by telling him to keep it in exchange for the Child, Gideon agrees - noting that he’s already got what he wanted (namely, Grogu’s blood with its rare properties - aka Midichlorians). Gideon permits Mando to take the Child, provided he leaves the ship and they go their separate ways. But of course, it’s a ruse and the moment Mando tries to take the Child Gideon stabs him in the back and engages him with the Darksaber. Of course, it can’t cut through beskar so he is evenly matched against Mando’s beskar armour and spear. However Mando is the superior warrior and quickly disarms him, much to Gideon’s surprising glee. For when Mando takes Gideon to the bridge and offers the Darksaber to Bo-Katan, Gideon smugly tells Mando that Bo-Katan needed to win the Darksaber in combat - and that now means that she has to take it by force from Din. Bo-Katan’s indecision is interrupted by the proximity sensor, and Fennec informs the others that the Dark Troopers (with their Iron Man-like foot rockets) have reboarded the ship. They quickly march towards the bridge against a thumping dub step soundtrack, and Fennec seals the blast doors.

Trapped in an unwinnable position, the posse prepares for a Sundance-style fatal showdown. A single Dark Trooper all but overpowered Mando, so a platoon of them would vanquish even this elite squad in short order. Gideon idly taunts that no one except for himself and the Child will end up leaving the room alive.

Then the proximity sensor pings once more.

This is the moment when you expect a Deus ex Machina. When the odds are so heavily weighted against the protagonists that only a “machine of the gods” is going to be able to get them out of their impossible predicament. Season 2 laid the seeds for a couple of such options - most obviously, the New Republic has a small but insignificant presence in the Outer Rim that Mando has encountered a few times in his recent travels (almost literally the cavalry). Boba Fett may still be a part of the plan, skipping out only briefly to return with reinforcements. Despite the elimination of the coven on Navarro, perhaps another coven of the Mandalorian zealots might return to save the day as they did in Season 1.

But none of these really make proper sense. Ever since the first appearance of the Child in Season 1, and Mando’s subsequent quest to return him to his kind, all roads had to eventually lead to only one person. Not Ahsoka Tano, whose return was a welcome return to form (more on that later), but who steadfastly refused to be considered a Jedi after leaving the order and would not agree to train Grogu lest his attachment to Mando might lead him to suffer the same fate as her former Master. No - at this point in time, there exists only one true Jedi in the entire Galaxy.

Bo-Katan is the first to notice the solitary X-Wing approaching, with Cara’s subsequent quip suggesting it would make no difference at all - it might just be Captain Teva or Trapper Wolf again. But this was the first in a series of subtle but escalating hints as to how wrong she really is. If there were any doubt, the next few moments would lay them to rest. The X-Wing flies into the docking bay on the security cam - it bears indistinct but clearly older Rebellion-era markings, and does not respond to Bo-Katan’s hail. Grogu’s ears perk up - he senses the arrival. Then, abruptly, the Dark Troopers stop punching the door. In unison, they all do an about-face towards a new threat approaching. For the first time, the all-knowing smirk is wiped off Gideon’s face.

A gentle guitar arpeggio and choral ballad reminiscent of Qui-Gon and Padmé’s Funeral themes begins as we see the second clue on the security cam - a hooded figure walking down a hallway, wearing a dark cloak. It could still be anyone, but it could definitely be the one we’ve all silently hoped to see for so long. This is followed in short order by the third, almost definitive clue: the hooded figure on the security cam expertly wields a single lightsaber, cutting through Dark Troopers like butter. Bo-Katan immediately identifies the figure as a Jedi, and suddenly Moff Gideon’s face betrays fear for the first time.

Then we see the one thing we’ve waited decades for - a green lightsaber. Not a blue historical artefact wielded by plot-amour protected novice, but a brilliant green blade self-made to stand out against the deep blue desert skies of Tatooine. At last, we allow ourselves to feel hopeful once more. Only one of those Dark Troopers nearly ended Din Djarin minutes ago, but this figure deflects their blaster bolts back into them and slices through their torsos like the battledroids of old. However, unlike the flamboyant Jedi of the Old Republic, the figure’s strokes are spartan and precise. Grogu is at attention because he knows who’s coming to rescue them.

And finally, a low shot of the green blade shows the black leather glove holding onto it and all doubt is removed. It’s LUKE FUCKING SKYWALKER. Luke as the Jedi Master he (and his father) aspired be, at the height of his powers. Luke, who bested but never quite defeated Darth Vader, and through his unwavering faith enabled his father to destroy the most powerful evil in the Galaxy. No longer a naive farm boy, but a full fledged Jedi and, both by default and power, the Grand Master of the New Jedi Order. And certainly not the cranky old defeated hermit passing off for Luke in certain other films, with no hope, determination, or empathy. The REAL Luke Skywalker. This is who heard Grogu’s call two episodes ago, and is the only possible person with whom Grogu could end up with.

Luke slashes through several more Dark Troopers, and force pushes a crate against another. Craning his neck to see the carnage on the security cams, Moff Gideon realises that the battle is lost and he makes his desperate last move. Clutching the hidden blaster beneath his cloak, he fires at Bo-Katan before taking a shot at the Child. Mando valiantly throws himself into the line of fire - in a way, both moments would have been more powerful if beskar wasn’t so strong as to harmlessly absorb Gideon’s shots. So too would it have been if a shot got through to Grogu, putting him in grave danger.

The figure cleans up the Dark Troopers on the lower level and takes the elevator up towards the bridge. The Dark Troopers in the exterior hallway wait silently. We’ve seen this moment before - in A NEW HOPE, before the stormtroopers cut through the port on the Tantive IV; and again, in ROGUE ONE, as the lights go out on the Profundity’s docking bay. The final light ignites and the doors open - the Dark Troopers open fire, but their shots are easily deflected by the figure who twirls and swirls more elegantly through his prey, dancing through the corridor and using his hands to bat away debris and crush the exoskeleton of the final unfortunate trooper. We haven’t seen this kind of carnage since the other Skywalker exterminated the Separatists on Mustafar in REVENGE OF THE SITH.

Mando and Grogu know that it’s time, and he demands that the blast doors be opened. Not getting any favourable response from the others, he opens the door himself. As the blast doors part, we see the figure’s shrouded green lightsaber emerge through the smoke just as his mentor’s did at the start of THE PHANTOM MENACE. The figure slowly holsters his blade on his familiar belt, and deliberately hesitates as he removed his hood. As the iconic notes of the Binary Sunset play, at last we see the face of Luke Skywalker - here to rescue us - with just a little bit more wisdom and wear than he bore at the end of RETURN OF THE JEDI. Mando asks him if he is a Jedi, and Luke responds that he is (in the unmistakably optimistic voice of a young Mark Hamill). Luke reaches out, confidently asking Grogu to join him. When Mando queries Grogu’s reluctance, Luke wisely advises him that the Child wants his permission first.

What follows is the culmination of the series, a heart wrenching scene between Din and Grogu where Din breaks the creed and shows Grogu his face - a father saying goodbye to his son with his own eyes, echoing Luke’s own farewell to Anakin. Grogu doesn’t want to let go of Din until he hears a reassuring sound - R2D2’s familiar beep-bop cadence as he leans over to examine the Child, a clear moment of recognition between the two. Whether they’ve both met at some point in the past (perhaps prior to or during Grogu’s escape from the Jedi Temple), or whether R2 is suffering some PTSD from his memories of Yoda, remains to be seen. But it’s enough to win over Grogu, who allows Luke to pick him up and take him and R2 away. The final shots of Din’s final tearful goodbye and Luke, Grogu and R2 in the departing elevator against a triumphant refrain of the Mandalorian theme are iconic Star Wars images that will be etched in our minds forever alongside the Throne Room and other final shots.

I’M LUKE SKYWALKER - I’M HERE TO RESCUE YOU

I don’t want to relitigate the issues of the Disney Trilogy at length, suffice to say that the miserable end to that sorry saga far better illustrates them than any missive penned by me could. Yes, as things stand, everything that transpires in THE MANDALORIAN could lead to same sorry end just as the supposedly-fairytale ending of RETURN OF THE JEDI did. But the mere hope that it doesn’t have to, or that it is far enough away to be ignored, is enough to allow the moment to savoured for the delight that it represents.

Because Star Wars has always been about hope, and that hope has always been best embodied by Luke Skywalker - the “Son of Suns”. Luke is our childhood hero, the Boy Scout or Superman defined by his optimism and his faith in our better angels. His journey may venture through internal conflict, impatience, confusion, and failure - but he never gives up hope, even when it seems that all is lost. He was born in a moment of despair, as his mother’s dying breaths gave life to both he and his sister, and saved his father from a tortuous death. The prequel trilogy, fundamentally about perpetual-slave Anakin Skywalker’s hope for a better life for his family, may have ended with a Galaxy entering an era of oppression, but its final shot featured baby Luke with his closest kin watching the famous binary sunset and hoping for the eventual dawn to bring them out of the darkness.

We later meet Luke again in the eponymous A NEW HOPE as a sheltered and naive young farmhand, dreaming of making a difference in the fight against the evil Empire. Under the guidance of his watchful protector, he produces a one-in-a-million shot heard around the Galaxy. He trawls the Galaxy in search of a new mentor, whose trickery and patience are a foil for his impatient desire to return to the fight. After being humbled by a superior adversary and learning the dark truth of his parentage, he soon realises that his attachment to others can be a weakness to be exploited. Nevertheless, his faith in his friends and family remains resolute - even in the face of discouragement from his masters and enemies alike, Luke manages to persuade his broken and defeated father that he is not irredeemable. Luke’s unwavering belief provides the gentle push needed for Anakin to commit his final act to destroying the evil Emperor that had enslaved him and would destroy the only thing left in the universe for him to love.

Basically, after searching for his absent father his whole life, only to discover him to be one of the most terrible people in the Galaxy and believed to be beyond redemption by his only remaining friends, Luke still perseveres against all odds in believing there’s a tiny sparkle of good left him in - and ends up convincing his father of that as well. This is the most unbelievably optimistic person, who sees the bright side of things where everyone else sees nothing, and who never, ever gives up. He is what Star Wars is fundamentally all about.

IF THERE’S A BRIGHT CENTRE OF THE UNIVERSE, YOU’RE ON THE PLANET THAT IT’S FARTHEST FROM

However, the Disney Trilogy’s failure began with the first words of its opening crawl, claiming that “Luke Skywalker has vanished” - depriving us of that hope for a whole film. When he finally appears up at the intersection of the first and second movies, it turns out to have been a false hope - in a “subversion” of our expectations, the Luke we find is a shell of a person who has given up on his friends, his family, and his students. He is so devoid of hope and resigned to the ignominious fate of dying alone that he may as well be Darth Vader. After sensing the mere potential for evil in his only nephew, he doesn’t try to turn him away from it but stupidly draws his weapon on him in his sleep - and by doing so creates another version of his father. He senses a familiar darkness in the Resistance’s strange messenger, and resolves not to train her. And yet... suddenly, after a bizarre encounter with an addled apparition pretending to be Yoda, he softens and decides not to join with her in a fight to the death but instead perform some insanely draining Matrix-like distraction that ends up killing him anyway. His last ditch effort saved practically nothing, and didn’t end up mattering anyway when the nemesis he and his father sacrificed everything to destroy “somehow returned”.

Mark Hamill himself, who has lived and breathed the character for over 40 years, knew that none of this made sense coming from Luke - he would rather amusingly refer to this incarnation as “Jake” Skywalker. The people behind the Disney Trilogy have stated on record that Luke’s absence from the first film was to avoid stealing the spotlight from their new characters, and the butchering of his character in the second ostensibly appears to have paved the way for them to take over the role of the hero. It was as if, in some misguided zero-sum view of the Star Wars universe, in order for the new generation to succeed the old had to be destroyed (in more ways than just this one). And, in doing so, Disney deprived us of seeing the Luke Skywalker we all deserved.

GOOD, YOU’VE TAKEN YOUR FIRST STEPS INTO A LARGER WORLD

When Anakin Skywalker looks up at the night sky on Tatooine in THE PHANTOM MENACE, he wonders if anyone has ever visited them all - ominously suggesting that he’d be the first. There’s only so much of that story that can be told within the motion picture medium, and there have always been Star Wars stories that existed in the same universe but were not about the Galaxy-changing saga of the Skywalkers. From the Expanded Universe novels, to cartoons, games, and other non-saga films, the Star Wars Universe has weaved a rich tapestry for fans who have been invested in the diverse, fantastic, and advanced setting it provides for stories that reflect on our own human condition. Many of these stories were self contained - filling in gaps or corners of that tapestry - but just as many intersected with our beloved characters at various points of their lives, who at once both recognisable as their iconic selves but also given further colour and depth through new experiences and challenges.

Of Luke Skywalker in particular, we saw a hero struggling with his legacy and the monumental task of rebuilding the Galaxy and the Jedi Order in such as way as to not repeat the mistakes of the past. We saw Luke succeed and fail in training new Force-sensitive students into Jedi, and grow in power to become the new Grand Master of the Jedi Order. We saw him defeat stronger foes than he had before and weave his way through the intergalactic politics of the New Republic and Imperial Remnant. We saw him fall in love with Mara Jade, someone who had been tasked by the Emperor with killing him, marry her and have a son (appropriately) named Ben. We witnessed Luke live a full, difficult, but happy life with meaning and purpose - the kind of life his father always wanted but could never achieve.

With this Expanded Universe cast away by Disney, it was left to stories and shows like THE MANDALORIAN to sketch out the details of what is supposed to exists in the rest of the Star Wars Universe. Throughout its run, THE MANDALORIAN has demonstrated definitively that Disney’s approach in sidelining and belittling Luke and the story of the original and prequel trilogies in order to tell new stories in that universe was not only unnecessary, but completely wrong. By starting with a fresh style and a lone gun for hire in a new, small frontier in a corner of the universe it established a new dynamic in the transition period between the fall of the Empire and the establishment of the New Republic.

But as it continued to flesh out that small corner, we started to see bits of the familiar return from a variety of sources - some from the films such as Trandoshans, IG units, Jawas, Ugnaughts, AT-STs, Mos Eisley’s Docking Bay 94 populated with Pit Droids, Tusken Raiders; others from other media such as Cobb Vanth, Bo-Katan and the Mandalorian Death Watch, Ahsoka Tano (and soon hopefully Grand Admiral Thrawn!), and Dark Troopers from the 90s game DARK FORCES. Others still fleshed out things we’d heard about in previous stories but never seen - krayt dragons, krynkas, Quarren. And at the heart of it all - the Mandalorian creed and the mysterious and powerful Force-using species. We care about and are interested in all of these things because they are familiar elements of the Star Wars Universe, and we care about what new things Mando and the Child encounter because they are grounded in such elements to which we can already relate.

Most of the credit for this change in direction is due to the respective efforts of creator John Favreau and Executive Producer Dave Filoni. Favreau’s early contributions were largely responsible for the dramatic success of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and he has been involved with Star Wars for some time (voicing characters in SOLO and THE CLONE WARS). Filoni, himself the creator of THE CLONE WARS, has long effectively been George Lucas’s personally selected designated successor as the sage of all things Star Wars. Unlike JJ Abrams and Rian Johnson (relative neophytes to Lucasfilm, who seemed to be unable to move beyond their nostalgia for A NEW HOPE and desperation to spit on Lucas’s prequels), Favreau and Filoni have an understanding of the already-significant diversity of the Star Wars Universe, of its values and potential.

Favreau, Filoni and the fabulous team of writers and directors they collaborate with have treated the existing source material with respect (the same source material their boss claims not to exist), and have both intertwined and extended it in new ways that make sense and add depth to what came before. The production design has drawn on both the existing worlds of the original and prequel trilogies (and yes, even what would be yet to come in the Disney Trilogy), while referencing the original concept art of Ralph McQuarrie and Doug Chiang (the concept art based credit sequences are particularly inspired) and creating new environments, species and spacecraft that add greater diversity to those worlds. Even Ludwig Görannson’s music has hit it out of the park - not merely rehashing John William’s greatest hits (another area where the Disney Trilogy fell surprisingly short), but creating a whole new aesthetic that feels right for the style of the show, but is unmistakably Star Wars. In short, THE MANDALORIAN feels like a true addition to the Star Wars universe, which seemed impossible after the lukewarm reboot of the Disney Trilogy.

YOU WERE RIGHT ABOUT ME - TELL YOUR SISTER. YOU WERE RIGHT.

So this is why, when we first see the X-Wing appear, the hooded figure walking down the hallway, and the brilliant green blade - followed by the decisive elimination of the Dark Troopers through Gideon’s ship and the corridors leading to the bridge - longtime fans across the world could no longer contain their emotions, with many breaking down into tears of jubilation and relief. After being teased with horrible “subversions of expectations” and being told that our “theories sucked”, finally we actually got what we wanted after all this time - a reason to hope again.

This is the Luke Skywalker we’ve wanted to see after 37 years - not the naive farm boy or reclusive hermit, but the mature and powerful Jedi Master - and finally seeing him at his peak validated our feelings of frustration and neglect over after the past five years of mediocrity that was Disney’s attempt at rehashing Star Wars. It confirmed to us what we always belived: that Star Wars was not, after all, a one hit wonder and that the lightning in the bottle could be recaptured - if wielded by the right custodians who continue to explore the potential of the Star Wars universe to tell great new stories.

#starwars #the mandalorian

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bibhabmishra · 4 years

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The Princess Bride

It feels downright inconceivableI to devote only one chapter in a book about lessons gleaned from eighties movies to The Princess Bride. Why, just off the top of my head, while standing on my head, I can name five life lessons that this movie teaches you that you don’t learn anywhere else: 1. “Never go against a Sicilian when DEATH is on the line!” 2. “Love is the greatest thing—except for a nice mutton, lettuce, and toma- to sandwich when the mutton is nice and lean.” 3. “Life is pain. Anyone who says differently is selling something.” 4. Eventually, you learn not to mind the kissing parts. 5. And most important, “As you wish” = “I love you.” Such is the depth of wisdom in this film that in 2013, twenty-six years after its release, BuzzFeed devoted a listII to the lessons gleaned from it. A BuzzFeed list! Who needs the Oscars, Princess Bride, when you have that ultimate of mod- ern-day accolades? The Princess Bride is so adored that it’s probablyIII now a clichéd response on Internet dating websites: walks on the beach, an open fire, sunsets, and The Princess Bride. And yet, despite this, love for The Princess Bride is not seen as desperately hackneyed or cheesily safe. The Princess Bride is what you’d need a prospective love interest to cite as their favorite movie for the relationship to progress,IV it’s the one film that would make you rethink a lifelong friendship if you found out your best friend “just didn’t get it”—not that they would ever say that, because I honestly don’t know a single person of my generation who isn’t obsessed with this film.

And not just my generation: in As You Wish, a very enjoyable book about the making of The Princess Bride, Cary Elwes—who played Westley the farm boy, of course—recounts being told by both Pope John Paul II and Bill Clinton how much they loved the movie, proving that The Princess Bride appeals to saints and sinners alike.V Now, having said all that, I have a confession to make. I was not the big Princess Bride fan in my family when I was growing up. That title instead went to my sister, Nell. Our mother took us to see it at the movie theater when I must have been nine and Nell was seven, and even though the film was— incredibly—something of a commercial disappointment when it came out, the cinema was absolutely packed with kids like us. In my mind, everyone in the audience was utterly in thrall to this tale of Buttercup (Robin Wright), her true love Westley (Elwes), and their battles against Prince Humperdinck (Chris Sarandon), Vizzini (Wallace Shawn), and Count Rugen (Christopher Guest), and their eventual assistance from the brave swordsman Inigo (Mandy Patinkin), the giant Fezzik (the professional wrestler known as André the Giant), and Miracle Max (Billy Crystal). Afterward, we stood in the cinema atrium as our mother bundled us back into our coats. “Did you girls like it?” she asked. Standing there in her corduroy dungarees and T-shirt, Nell looked in a state of semi-shock. “I LOVED IT. I WANT TO SEE IT AGAIN RIGHT NOW!” she practically shouted. Now, The Princess Bride is wonderful, but in order to understand how unex- pected this proclamation was, you have to know a little bit about my sister. Ever since she was old enough to throw a tantrum, my sister refused to wear dresses. She never played with dolls. She refused to let my mother brush her hair and had apparently no interest in her physical appearance. She did not like mushy stories—she didn’t even like reading books. In other words, she was the complete opposite to me. How much of that was a deliberate reaction against me, a younger sibling defining herself in opposition to the older one, and how much of it was simply an innate part of Nell was already a moot point when we went to see The Princess Bride: Nell’s parameters were so firmly set by then that her nickname in our family was “the tough customer.” She would consent to drink only one kind of fruit juice (apple), and buy only one brand (Red Cheek), and only if it came out of a can (never a carton), so there was absolutely no negotiating with her about mushy princesses. Lord only knows how my mother got her to see the movie in the first place. She must have hid- den the title from her. And yet, like the grandson in the film, Kevin Arnold,VI Nell found that, against all odds, she did enjoy the story, just as Kevin’s grandfather, Columbo,VII promises. I think Nell made my mother take her to see the film at the cinema at least three more times. As she wished. When it came out on VHS, we bought it immediately and it was understood that the videocassette was officially Nell’s, just as the videocassette for Ferris Bueller’s Day Off was officially mine. When she found out that the film had originally been a book by William Goldman, who also wrote the screenplay, she asked my amazed mother to buy that, too. Nell read it over and over until the pages fell out, so she stuck them back in and then read the book again. The Princess Bride was the book that taught her to like books, as much as the movie taught her to relax some of her other rules. She developed a lifelong crush on Westley and, not long after, she started wearing dresses, too. The reasons why Nell loved this film so much exemplify, I think, why it is universally adored in a way that, say, the vaguely similar and contemporary The Never-Ending Story is not. It’s a fairy tale for those who love fairy tales, but it’s also a self-aware spoof for those who don’t; it’s an adventure film for boys and—for once—girls, too, but without pandering to or excluding either; it’s got a plot for kids, dialogue for adults, and jokes for everyone; it’s a genre film and a satire of a genre film; it’s a very funny movie in which everybody is playing it straight; it’s smart and sweet and smart about its sweetness, but also sweet about its smarts. Unlike, say, Shrek, there are no jokes here for parents that go over the kids’ heads: all generations enjoy it on exactly the same level. It’s a movie that lets people who don’t like certain things like those things, while at the same time not betraying the original fans. But most of all, The Princess Bride is about one thing in particular: “The Princess Bride is a story about love,” says Cary Elwes. “So much happens in the movie—giants, fencing, kidnapping. But it’s really a film about love.” This might seem like a statement of the obvious, but it isn’t, actually. Yes, the film is ostensibly about the great true love between Buttercup and Westley, and their most perfect kiss that leaves all the other kisses in the world behind. Both Elwes and Wright were so astonishingly beautiful when they made the film that, watching them, it’s hard to believe any love ever existed on this plan- et other than theirs. And they, rather pleasingly, were quite taken with one an- other. In his book, Elwes talks at length about how “smitten” he was with Wright, and she says precisely the same about him: “I was absolutely smitten with Cary. So obviously that helped with our onscreen chemistry. . . . It doesn’t matter how many years go by, I will love Cary forever.” Disappointingly, however, Elwes insists that they remained just friends. “Everyone asks if there was more!” he says, sounding a little exasperated, apparently unable to see what everyone else can: namely, that it seems against the laws of nature for two such beautiful people not to have had sex at least once. The last scene that Elwes shot was of him and Wright kissing on horse- back, creating “the most perfect kiss” of all time against a sunset. Surely that was romantic. “Well, not really. Robin and I were friends by that point so we kept laughing, and [the director] Rob [Reiner] was going, ‘Touch her face, touch her face!’ ” He laughs. But Westley and Buttercup’s love is only a part of the film, and only one of several love stories in the film. There is also, for a start, the great love between Inigo and Fezzik. The scene in which a drunken and broken Inigo looks up into Fezzik’s face in the Thieves Forest and Fezzik says a simple, smiling hello is much more moving than the moment when Buttercup realizes the Dread Pirate Roberts is actually Westley (not least because she’s just pushed him down a hill). Even if Inigo does become the Dread Pirate Roberts at the end of the film, as Westley suggests he should, it is as impossible to imagine him going off without Fezzik as it is to imagine Buttercup and Westley being severed. This love between the two men is at the root of one of the film’s subtlest lessons. Bad guys teach audiences how to think of opponents in life, and this is especially true of bad guys in books and films aimed at kids. Because stories for kids tend to be relatively simple, villains in these films are almost invariably evil, and that’s all there is to be said about them. Cruella de Vil, Snow White’s stepmother, the witch in Rapunzel: WHAT a bunch of moody bitches. This is also certainly true of movies for children in the 1980s, from the frankly terri- fying Judge Doom (Christopher Lloyd) in Who Framed Roger Rabbit to the enjoyably evil Ursula in The Little Mermaid. It’s a pleasingly basic approach, and one that validates most kids’ (and adults’) view of the world: “I am good and anyone who thwarts me is wicked and there is no point in trying to think about things from their point of view because they have no inner life of their own beyond pure evil and a desire to impede me.” The Princess Bride, however, does something different. It’s easy to forget this once you’ve seen the movie and fallen in love with the characters but Inigo and Fezzik are, ostensibly, bad guys. When we first meet them in the movie, they knock our heroine, Buttercup, unconscious and kidnap her for Vizzini. We are also told they will kill her. Our princess! In the eyes of children, you can’t get much more evil than that. They are hired guns in the re- venge business, which is not a job for a good guy in any fairy tale. But Gold- man flips it around. We quickly see Inigo and, in particular, Fezzik being ex- tremely sweet with each other, doing their little rhymes together and trying to protect one another from Vizzini’s ire. Their love for one another shows us there is more to these villains than villainy. Goldman then ups the ante even further by having Inigo describe to the Man in Black how he has devoted his life to avenging the death of his father, thus giving him the kind of emotional backstory kids can definitely understand, as well as adding another mission to the movie. Soon after beating (but not killing) Inigo, the Man in Black fights with Fezzik, who we already know has a similarly sad past (“unemployed—IN GREENLAND”). Plenty of villains were once good before crossing to the dark side: Darth Vader, many of Batman’s nemeses, Voldemort. The point in those stories is that the difference between true evil and true greatness comes down to one wrong decision, one wrong turn, and there is no going back from that. But The Princess Bride does something more subtle: it suggests that good people some- times end up doing bad things, but are still good, have stories of their own, and are capable of love. Inigo and Fezzik both killed people in the past for Vizzini, but they’re all still good people. This is quite a message for kids (and adults) to take in: not everything is clear-cut when it comes to good and bad, even in fairy tales. In the original novel, William Goldman goes into much greater detail about Fezzik and Inigo’s friendship, and this is one of the reasons why I—in all hon- esty—pre-fer the book to the film.VIII But the film alludes to it enough in order for audiences to understand the real bond between the men, and partly this happens through the script and partly through the actors, especially one actor in particular. At one point, Arnold Schwarzenegger was considered for the role of Fezzik, but, thank heavens, he was already too expensive by the time the film finally started shooting. Where Schwarzenegger is all jarring rectangles and jut- ting jaw, André the Giant was all soft circles and goofy smiles. Where Schwarzenegger palpably punished himself to a superhuman extent to get the body he clearly wanted so badly, the man born André René Roussimoff suf- fered from gigantism due to acromegaly and had no choice about his size, just as Fezzik didn’t, much to the latter’s misery (“It’s not my fault being the big- gest and the strongest—I don’t even exercise”). It would be a patronizing cliché to say André was born to play Fezzik, but he was certainly more right for the role than Schwarzenegger. By the time he made The Princess Bride, André was seven feet, four inches and weighed more than 540 pounds. Easily the sweetest stories in Cary Elwes’s book come from the cast and crew’s memories of the wrestler, who died in 1993 at the age of forty-six, and this is not mere sentimentality. Quite a few of The Princess Bride’s cast have, sadly, since died, including Mel Smith, Peter Cook, and Peter Falk, but none of them prompts the same kind of fondness as that felt for André. “It’s safe to say that he was easily the most popular person on the movie,” Elwes writes. “Everyone just loved him.” Partly this is due to the extraordinary nature of the man. Robin Wright re- calls going out to a dinner with him where he ate “four or five entrees, three or four appetizers, a couple of baskets of bread, and then he’s like, I’m ready for seconds. And then desserts. I think he went through a case of wine and he wasn’t even tipsy.” But it was André’s innately gentle nature that made him so beloved. His “compassion and protective nature,” Elwes writes, helped Wallace Shawn over- come his almost paralyzing fear of heights when they were filming the climb up the Cliffs of Insanity. When Robin Wright felt chilly when filming outdoors, André would place one of his huge hands on top of Wright’s head. “She said it was like having a giant hot water bottle up there. It certainly did the trick; he didn’t even mess up her hair that much!” Elwes writes. When he died, William Goldman wrote his obituary in New York magazine. The last lines were as fol- lows: “André once said to Billy Crystal, ‘We do not live long, the big and the small.’ Alas.” Next, on a smaller level, is the love between Miracle Max (Crystal) and his aged wife, Valerie (Carol Kane). Initially they seem simply like a squabbling old couple, playing purely for broad comedy (and their scene is the broadest comedic one in the film). But it soon becomes clear that Valerie is needling Max only because she wants him to get back his confidence in his work after Prince Humperdinck destroyed it by sacking them, and her little cheer when her husband agrees to make a miracle for Inigo is really very touching. By the end of their scene, they’re working together, finishing one another’s sentences, holding each other arm in arm, and whispering little asides to one another. As a portrait of elderly marriage goes, this one is a pretty lovely one. Finally, there’s the great love story that frames the whole movie: the one be- tween the grandson/Kevin Arnold (Fred Savage) and the grandfather/Columbo (Peter Falk). In the beginning of the movie, the grandson is irritated by his cheek-pinching grandfather and can hardly believe that he has to stop playing his adorably primitive-looking computer baseball game to listen to grandfather read a book.IX As the film progresses, the relationship between the grandson and grandfather progresses almost like a traditional love story: the grandson slowly gets more interested, clutching his covers anxiously when Buttercup is almost eaten by the Shrieking Eels; then he gets angry, banging his bed with his fist when it seems like Westley has been killed; and finally, he comes around entirely and tells his grandfather to come back the next day to read the book again. “As you wish.” His grandfather smiles, and the film ends. “That wasn’t actu- ally in the script,” Elwes says. “They came up with him saying that on, I think, the last day, and it really captures the love between the grandfather and grand- son. You can also see the tenderness between Fred Savage and Peter Falk.”

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firebunnylover · 5 years

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LoSH SU AU/Shards AU - Part 2 - Characters

Welp, this is officially the longer part of the AU explained post. Follow up to the first post here, this time going into the characters that are established so far.

Also. Don’t be surprised by who gets the biggest section.

The Crystal Legion (i apologize if i miss anyone you wanted to see on the list, its really hard to keep track of all of them, it's like herding kittens - but i'm trying to hit the main ones first, or at least the ones ive fleshed out so far - when i finish coming up with the others i'll make another post for characters).

To clarify on who the Leadership positions “belong” to in the main timeframe, it’s Superman, Kell, Lightning Lad, Cosmic Boy and Saturn Girl.

While the origin of Superman and Kell are still relatively to the original idea I posted (my idea of Pink back then has been obliterated...), where they were intended to be a single type gem made from an asteroid (preferably a Ruby duo for missions), but came out as a Ruby and Sapphire, and far too big. They came out just as Rose and Zhay started causing problems on Earth for the Homeworld colonizing efforts, so the Blue Diamond then had them go to earth to find the rebels with the offer that they will not be shattered due to being off-color.

Kal El, or as humans from the 20th century and onwards would call him, Clark, lacks pristine future vision desired from Sapphires. He usually gets fuzzy visions that can vary quite quickly depending on the different actions taken, rarely seeing anything clear happening in the future. He quickly fell in love with the Earth when he came across a human settlement and was taken in, where he was given the name Superman due to his unique abilities.

He almost forgot about his original mission, but was rudely reminded when he found Homeworld Gems trying to kidnap people to bring to the zoo. He quickly sided with the humans and fought off the other Gems, making him wanted by Homeworld. Rose caught wind about him, and went to see him. He was rather easy to persuade to join them, but served as the prompt to fight for other gems.

After the war, Kal spent more times with humans again, constantly helping whoever he can. Gained a fondness for children, and came to want one for himself. The problem being that when he learned of adoption, he came to think that he could take in children who don’t have any parents around in the immediate area. It got so bad that the other Gems finally built a fence when the human population got over 50 and a literal mob formed - the humans were scared away but enough was enough.

But you do not want to bring children any harm in his presence, for he will thrash you good. Signed up as a foster parent in the beach area, but due to a low population, never got to foster any kids. Was thrilled to help raise Cham as a baby… but was one of the few Gems that understood how to care for a human baby, and as a result got sleep deprived.

Kell El was, more or less, the unwilling tag along. Unlike Kal, he wasn’t as entranced with Earth or Humanity, sticking to his task of finding the Rebels, but as Rose was just about impossible to find for some reason (she figured out how to quickly get out of the last places she was spotted), he started making return trips where he had left Kal, the human settlement, as he was the only other gem for company.

When the Homeworld gems came to bring humans to the zoo, he found himself being flocked to by the humans as Kal was fighting off the invaders. Since he wasn’t witnessed by Homeworld soldiers, he wasn’t put on a wanted list. But quickly realized that even if he were to capture the rebels, that wouldn’t really be a guarantee on his safety, after stumbling into a Kindergarten and witnessing two new off-color gems being caught immediately, one being shattered and the other one being bubbled away. So he joined the rebels out of spite.

Post war, Kell was still not too crazy about Earth, but had developed a soft spot for the other gems he was still with, choosing to stay with them. His interactions with humans however got worse. They get angry, he gets angry, ugly fights. And then his worst habit came into development - stepping on others. Due to his larger-than-average-ruby size, he fails to notice anything below his torso unless it yells at him. This did not go well when Superman witnessed him stepping on several children. Kell found himself bubbled for an hour as a time out.

Rokk/Cosmic Boy was a standard Amethyst for guard duty, and had developed magnetic powers as a result of the soil of his kindergarten. However, he would join the rebels when he became fond of Imra and Garth, who he worked with. A few hundred years into the war, he found an Amethyst that had emerged late that came out from underneath where he did, thus was stunted in height. The small Amethyst imprinted on Rokk, prompting him to follow him back to the rebels, and was dubbed Pol. Soon, he and Pol became the closest gem duo, Pol constantly looking up to Rokk, and aspiring to live up to him. In an effort to impress Rokk though, Pol was shattered on the battlefield. This left a lasting mental scar, as Rokk was too afraid afterwards to even consider letting anyone he considers too young to join any fights or missions.

Garth, and Ayla, are both Orange Celestites with their gems cut, as Celestites are designated to having twin partners upon being made, and are typically meant to be higher than a quartz in term of rank. Was the one who convinced Rokk to follow after Imra when she left to join the rebels. Garth’s gem has one crack in it, which he got after Rose’s death, and he uses barite to fill it. Ayla is almost completely broken, thus she is kept in a bubble in the temple, as using a filling agent could cause more harm than good in her case. Lightning Lad… has a huge ego problem due to a combo of being both a rare cut and color of his gem type that are highly valued warriors in homeworld, and being seen as a hero on Earth.

Imra as a Rhodochrosite is a gem meant for controlling other gems and interrogation, with both psychic abilities and strength. But she preferred to talk things out with others rather than using force if possible, eventually finding herself fighting against the system and going to the Crystal Gems. Her discomfort on reading other minds without permission was the main reason why she never found out Rose’s true identity. Helped Garth and Rokk hold themselves together due to the states of the gems they were closest to. While not as into humans as Superman, she’s inclined to help them out, as she is more empathetic due to her powers, although she does draw a line with the whole adoption/abduction thing.

Querl was a Tourmaline made during the war, along with several other gems as Rough Diamonds, thus given the second name Brainiac 5 as he is among the 5th Gem to be inserted with a shard of the original Green Diamond, as new and artificial Diamonds were formed by Alchemy rather than the traditional method of gem creations. Rough Diamonds are engineered to be unable to discuss anything related to diamonds unless they get some kind of wave of the order not to say anything, so while Pink/Rose was suspicious of who he was, there was no way to get a clear answer.

Was quite literally dragged over to the Crystal Gems when Zhay and Kell captured him from Yellow Diamond’s court as a hostage. Despite that, he was rather indifferent towards the war on both sides, UNTIL he met Sapphire Superman, who he fell head over heels. Afterwards, he warmed up to the Crystal Gems and their purpose and sided fully with them, and grew fascinated with organic life, humans and their ability to change as a culture and evolve. Will not hesitate to dissect them though.

Brainy is responsible for inspecting everyone’s gems to make sure they are in good condition, and was the one who initially discovered that Kal and Kell both had shards in their gems. He insists on doing an inspection every earth year. Which everyone dreads. It’s like dental appointments for gems.

For the most part, life on Earth is good... at least... until his gem got a crack. That caused him... personality problems.

Tinya is an Obsidian from White Diamond’s court. She was previously under the care of a very kind Agate who did her best to treat gems equally under her and encouraged and/or pushed better treatment for gems designated to the lower classes, but frustration with the system and the inability to change it left Tinya cynical about Homeworld’s order and structure, fleeing to earth to assist the rebellion, hoping the new order will flip everything over. Still carries a lot of pride with herself, and is the troublemaker of the group as she now has no more high-court duties to worry about. Had only met White Diamond once, and she refuses to discuss what exactly happened.

Timber Wolf is a Jasper made on earth, not for fighting, but to experiment on. Was left with Mar Londo, a grey Agate put in charge of a new science program under Yellow Diamond to help further the war efforts. He was put under limited corruption on the physical level before being moved onto the mental stage, but escaped before the mental stage was finished. Upon being found by the Crystal Gems, Rose healed him enough to help him regain control mentally, but remained physically corrupted. Had a lot of respect for Zhay as they were both Jaspers, and was the only other gem who understood what she went through when she was partially corrupted.

Was and still is constantly mistaken for a werewolf by humans, and has come to have a love-hate relationship with the fall holiday… Halloween. On one hand, he can walk around without too many eyes on him. On the other hand, there are the humans that try to remove what they think is a costume, those odd movies with werewolves (some he can tolerate, others he burns whatever copies he comes across), and the candy eaters.

Bouncing Boy, a Dumotierite Quartz, was one of the gems that emerged after the war. He was very quick to adapt to life on earth and human culture, never knowing the stress of Homeworld expectations, and took the human name Chuck. The softest gem to ever exist, what Rose aspired to be but couldn’t fully capture - a caring person to those in need, and better at connecting to others in full honesty.

Prefers to shapeshift into a ball rather than summon a weapon for fighting. Is one of about half the gems that can tolerate eating, and likes it. Had more familiarity with raising human children, but his supplies of horror films he stashes has led to Cham watching films at a very young age that did give him nightmares.

Triplicate Girl came out of the ground long after the war… but it was before she was ever expected to. One of the earliest prototypes of the cluster, rather than being composed of shattered gems, her gems were deliberately designed to resemble a phantom quartz: Amethyst and Citrine together, encased in White Quartz. Due to the appearance, it was assumed she was a byproduct of the rushed gem production on Earth during the war. Came out looking more like the cluster prototypes, but due to the fact she’s not composed of shattered gems, was able to reshape herself to resemble a more human shape eventually. Was found by Bouncing Boy, and they bonded quickly.

As for the ability to split into three - she can split her light formation into three separate entities with distinct personalities, as a result of her gem being three different quartz types. However, the personality that has their gem depends on which one splits away first - whoever separates from the body first gets the gem, so they all get equal grabs on it. However, her ability to split up is limited by distance and time. A few days to a few week of her being separate is usually okay, but after a while, has to get back together otherwise they risk getting poofed due to the strain.

Shrinking Violet was a tourmaline that came out after Triplicate Girl. Her extended stay in the ground didn’t stunt her growth, but it did cause her shape shifting problems, as she can only shrink down from her original size. Curious on homeworld gems, she began pestering Brainy, as they are the same type of gem despite the different shapes - his is finely cut while hers is polished. While initially annoyed, Brainy found himself enjoying her company, as there finally was someone able to keep up with his scientific ramblings. Enjoys experimenting with mechanics and botany. Was captured by human children once as she was mistaken for a fairy. She eventually got out though. Can and will curse like a sailor.

Nemesis Kid/Hart is the youngest of the gems to come from the Earth, only coming out 500 years prior to the main events. As a Gaspeite, he was designed to act as an high-ranking enforcer for Homeworld with the ability to neutralize the ability of other gems. But that clearly isn't happening on Earth. As there is an age gap between him and the last few gems that came out before him by almost 700 years, he wandered around the Kindergarten before being found my Cosmic Boy and was taken to the others. Like Pol, he came to look up to Cosmic Boy as an idol, but due to Rokk’s strict rules on no young gems coming on missions, he has only been allowed during the last 50 years to come along.

Chameleon Boy, aka Reep, learned shapeshifting faster than any of the other gems, much to others confusion, who would all take a while to figure out how to adjust their forms. As a baby, everyone was constantly on alert when he was unable to be found, worried he might have shapeshifted into a small animal. During which Kell was forbidden to be anywhere NEAR the house by 300 feet, as he had stepped on Cham before - in his regular baby form.

As he got older, Cham quickly picked up on the odd glances made by everyone when anyone remotely mentioned Rose and Zhay, and learned quickly about the relationship between the two that the Legion knew, the shattering of Pink Diamond, and how his mom fell into a depression afterwards.

He has started a habit of sneaking out of the house to follow other gems during missions due to the sheer boredom, as well as influence from Tinya. Although Superman has been trying to convince the others to give him a trial mission.

Sometimes he will shapeshift to look like a regular human, but he can’t maintain it for long, compared to all of his other forms. He’s not really sure why.

Liggt, while looking like a fully corrupted gem - his appearance slightly similar to a sea slug, is aware of who he is and of his surroundings. However, Cham is the only one able to communicate with him, and Liggt tends to take long periods of sleep. Has a rather cheeky attitude towards humans, prides himself on being the son of Zhay. Is very soft, as he doesn't seem to have any bones, doesn’t get injured easily, and lacks a full nervous system, so Kell could step on him and the little guy wouldn’t notice much. Until the other gems are chasing after Kell.

Val Armorr is 100% human. He was on the run from the foster system before being adopted by the gems, and Cham began dragging him along when following after the other gems. Superman quickly noticed Val was very good at fighting, so he began teaching him how to spar efficiently. He is still adjusting to the gems and their lack of understanding of humans stuff.

As for life before the Crystal Legion… it had a bad start. His father was abusive towards him and his mom, and his mom began taking it out on him. When child services came when he was 6, his maternal grandparents didn't want anything to do with him. He got taken in by an elderly man named Toshiaki for a few years, who taught him how to fight, but he passed away when Val was 10. Since then he had been in and out of different foster homes before deciding to try making it by himself.

There’s been few people he’s willingly kept in touch from this period of time, one of them another foster kid who decided to also make it on his own - Billy Batson.

As for how he got stuck with the Legion, that’s for later discussions.

Gems and Humans that aren’t immediate members of the Legion - initially at least:

Lois Lane was a reporter during the Roaring 20’s, and literally broke into the temple at the beach to get evidence of the “Odd Jewelry Fellows” residing in what people considered an old cave. Superman found her, helped her get out as the rest of the gems were not in the best of moods and had a less than gentle method of removing things not meant for the temple, and was quickly smitten by her. After a while, he asked her out and they began to date, as well as go on investigations together. It didn’t last, but they remained good friends, all the way up to the current time period.

Also due to her explaining how humans can adopt children that aren’t genetically theirs, its her fault that the other gems eventually had to put up a fence because of Superman (HE CAME OVER TO HER PLACE AND CRIED FOR THREE DAYS STRAIGHT). Is over 100 currently, and it may or may not be related to her time with the gems.

RJ Brande is a successful businessman from Texas who enjoys travel a lot, and loved Zhay. He had problems back home due to his more liberal views on things compared to his traditional/conservative Southern family. So that was something he and Zhay could immediately relate to. Encouraged Zhay to try to reconnect to the remaining gems - and it went better than expected.

Hasn’t contacted his immediate family in years - he doesn’t want them targeting his twin boys due to their unhuman appearance, and their gem peers. Despite having to be out of town most of time, he makes an effort to drop by as often as possible, and to Video Call Cham as often as possible. Quickly welcomed Val to the family, and doesn’t press for details on his past.

Bruce Wayne - much like in the DC comics, a rich business owner with an alter-ego named Batman who fights crime. Does do the vigilante justice stuff in the Empire City of the AU, tracks down the Gems when he’s dealing with a bunch of criminals using shattered remains for bad crime stuff. Has already adopted kids - the batkids are equivalent to the Cool Kids (haven’t decided if he has all the batkids yet or if he still has to adopt a few more - Dick Greyson is definitely there tho). Has been hitting on Clark, and acting like a Sugar Daddy at times. Everyone in the Crystal Legion is semi-dreading the two actually being together because that would be two people with the vice of trying to adopt every single child ever.

Mekt is an off-color blue celestite. He didn’t have a twin when he came out of the ground, but as the war was going on at this point, no resources were to be wasted. So rather than being shattered, he was assigned to be an imitation Pearl - equivalent to a real Pearl with status and decorated and given makeup to look like one as much as possible, but more widely available and usually given to newer-high status gems before they get new Pearls. He got handed around for several years before his final owner, a Golden Beryl. His last owner was nice, and they did have a relationship, but there were on uneven levels of power for their relationship to really work in a healthy manner. Mekt eventually left with Ayla to join the Crystal Gems upon her persuasion. But like Garth and Ayla, his gem got cracked, although his were thin and across his whole surface, compared to Garth.

Post war, he left the Crystal Legion, and ambled across different cultures with humans, although whenever he needed to get more filling to replace what he lost, he would need to find Brainy to help, which was usually about half a century. Unlike the Legion, he did get into more sinister activities during his time after the war. During the 20’s, his more notable activity then was working with a mafia - as both a callboy and for dirty business involving alcohol as prohibition became a thing.

Later on, Brainy dragged him to the Temple to get his cracks filled, just a few months after Reep and Liggt were born. He had some experience with helping with babies before, and was appalled by the majority of other gems because they didn’t know squat about how to properly care for babies. As Superman was in desperate need of sleep (despite denial) and the other gems had missions to go on, Mekt was put in the babysitter position. Due to the soft spots he had for children, Mekt got a job to get stuff for them when RJ wasn’t necessarily available and the other gems said no. He will not tell the kids what TYPE of job. Not illegal. Just adult stuff.

As for serious relationships… he is attracted to Kell. Kell, being the oblivious one, can’t figure out when Mekt is flirting with him, at all, for the last 5000 years.

In regards to him being a Celestite vs his position in homeworld culture as an imitation Pearl, he sincerely wishes he was created as a Pearl, similar to people being trans. So he experiences some body dysphoria in regards to his gem not being a Pearl. He hasn’t told anyone about it outloud though. Well, no one in the Legion currently.

The late arrivals from Space - that would be Ron Karr, a Peridot. Like Peri in the show, he is in charge of checking the status of the cluster. He eventually comes to Earth with backup after he complains about the gems on Earth interrupting his mission, getting stuck on what he considered... filthy dirt ball at the time.

He’s one of the few Gen 2 Peridots that can still shapeshift, which he’s as good at as Cham, although he’s still stunted in height. As for his relationship with Mekt, as they were teammates in the LSV in the cartoon show, Ron-Karr quickly writes him off as some cheap faux-pearl and even offers to be his new owner, which served as a catalyst for the two to have a fight. But afterwards, they smoothed things out, and form a pretty calm friendship. So calm they end of being roommates at the barn.

Has called a Diamond a clod. Notably the Diamond who replaced Pink shortly after the war.

#losh #shards au #su au #legion of superheroes #you guys shouldn't be surprised by who's part is the longest #at all #he's my trash baby #I swear I've worked on the others

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esmeiolanthe · 5 years

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Spy Challenge rules

I’ve made up a challenge, because making up challenges is fun. It has to do with spies, because spies are cool. The rules are pretty hefty, because I like making lists and challenge rules are all about lists. You can read the rules below the cut or at my Dreamwidth.

The challenge is to play a successful spy. There are a few Dos, a few Don’ts, and lots of flavor.

Max Body skill (Spies need to be able to climb things, swim away from things, ski down mountains after jumping out of airplanes, and fight big thugs with metal teeth – or at least James Bond does in the movies…)

Max Logic skill (Spies need to know how to figure things out from little hints and scraps of information, and know what information is important and what isn’t)

Max Charisma skill (Spies often have to recruit others to find things out for them, so they need to be charming)

If your sim was a playable with a family, you have two options.

1. Easy Mode: You can have contact with your family as normal – unless your cover is blown

2. Hard Mode: You can have contact with one relative of your choice, once per week +200 points for voluntarily completing the challenge on Hard Mode

DON’T

Do NOT take a job in the Intelligence career, if it’s available in your game set up (Successful spies don’t go around saying “Hi, I’m a spy!”)

Do NOT use strawberry juice (If someone gets mad at a spy and somehow blows their cover, their life is on the line, after all)

FLAVOR SKILLS

Spies have lots of skills they need to know. I freely admit that I picked up a lot of these from a BBC reality show called Spy that came out in the early 2000s. I’ll list the skill and then how to incorporate it into your game.

Go gray/Go undercover: Spies need to be able to blend in with everyone else and not stand out in any way at all. Get a job in any career (except Intelligence), but make sure you do NOT pass Level 5. If you pass Level 5, your cover is blown. You may not ignore chance cards.

Withstand torture: Spies need to be able to keep their heads at all times, even under adverse conditions. Keep your sim with all meters in orange/red for at least 24 hours without any critical failures or death. “Critical failures” are the Shrink, the Social Bunny, or any of the Aspiration desperation actions. If your sim wets their pants, that’s okay – just have them drink three glasses of water right away afterwards. +15 for every time you complete this. You can only choose to do this once. It may trigger additional times based on other circumstances.

Talk their way into someone’s home: Spies need to be personable and able to talk their way into places. Build a relationship with another sim such that they invite you to a community lot/on a date. When you get the invitation, accept it, and have the outing/date be at least a Good Time if not better. Bonus points if this sim is a townie or a safe NPC. +5 for every time you complete this.

Follow someone: Spies need to be able to follow people without being caught. Go to from one community lot to another and see the same sim 5 times in a row. (This is somewhat random due to game mechanisms, but theoretically possible.) +20 for every time you accomplish this.

Get someone to do iffy things for them: The first step for a spy to recruit an informant is to get them to do something a little bit iffy but not actually illegal. If that works, they ask for a bit more and a bit more and all of a sudden, the spy has another unwitting spy working for them. Use Influence 5 times in a row without being rejected. Refusal to perform the task resets the counter to 0 and means that you can never try Influence on that particular sim again. Bonus points if you manage this on 5 different people. +5 for every time you complete this. +25 bonus points for completing this with 5 different people.

Be good at languages: Spies need to be able to talk to people from other countries. In some cases, they even need to pass as people from other countries. Travel to all three vacation destinations and learn the vacation greetings. Do not stay at expensive hotels, and do not stay a long time, as both of these will make your sim stand out. +10 for every vacation destination greeting mastered.

Evade pursuers: Spies need to be able to get away when an enemy is following or actively chasing them. Learn to teleport, either from the ninja or from meditation once your Logic skill gets high enough. +10 for learning via meditation, +20 for learning from the ninja. You can only learn to teleport via one method, not both.

Have covert contacts with allies, informers, double agents, and so forth: Sometimes spies need to meet with contacts that they can’t really be seen with, so these meetings need to be brief, casual, and apparently accidental. In Good Omens, Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman stated that this was usually done by feeding the ducks, but there aren’t any ducks to feed in TS2. Fish in public and chat with other sims fishing. +5 per event.

Romance/seduce people: Spies sometimes have to use their sex appeal to get information from the enemy. Get Mr. Big/The Diva to fall in love with you. Bonus points if the love is one-sided (them to you only). Double bonus points if the one you seduce is the one that’s opposite your autonomous gender preference. +50 for successful completion. +25 for a one-sided love. +50 for a successful romance with the opposite of your autonomous gender preference.

Take covert pictures/plant cameras: Spies often need to get footage of an enemy doing something, or need to photograph important documents. Take pictures on four separate, busy community lots without having any other sims looking in your direction when you take the picture. If you do not have Bon Voyage, see if you can figure out a way to use the University career reward. +15 for every time you manage this.

Send hidden messages in innocuous things: Spies sometimes send messages in otherwise ordinary items rather than on secret thumb drives or microdots or similar. (For instance, sending a contact a perfectly ordinary book where the message is conveyed by the book chosen.) Paint a picture or write a novel. The painting cannot be a masterpiece, and the novel cannot be a best-seller, since this will make your sim stand out. +10 for every time you complete this.

Drive well: As anyone who has ever watched a spy movie knows, car chases are inevitable. Buy a car, install an alarm, and “Go for a spin” 3 times a week to practice driving – and to learn the lay of the land. +10 at the end of the challenge if you have completed this faithfully. If you have not completed it faithfully, -10 points.

Hack into systems: Spies often need to get into protected databases. Have a LAN party 2 times a week and chat online 3 times a week. +10 at the end of the challenge if you have completed this faithfully. If you have not completed it faithfully, -10 points.

Courier items from one place to another: Spies often need to transport secret documents, packages, or messages. (Fun Fact: Josephine Baker once smuggled important documents past an enemy checkpoint in her underwear.) Take something from one lot to another lot and leave it at the second lot. The second lot must be a community lot. You can hand the item off to a secret contact identified with the appropriate code phrase (see below). Bonus points if you somehow manage to leave the item on a community lot without handing it off to a contact. Extra bonus points if the item in question didn’t belong to your sim in the first place – for example, a gnome stolen from a different sim’s house. +10 for each successful courier mission. +20 if you manage to leave the couriered item on a community lot without handing it off to a contact. +10 if the item in question didn’t belong to you in the first place.

Use code phrases: Spies often have to identify allies they have never met to get help in difficult or emergency situations. To be sure that you are working with an ally, first pick an area of Interest. There are 18 of these in TS2. Each area of Interest has 5 icons that represent it. For example, for Sci-Fi, the icons are rocket ship, astronaut, robot, planet, gray alien. (You can find a full list here: http://sims.wikia.com/wiki/Interest) Before you go to a meeting, pick a sequence of icons. This sequence can be as few as two icons, or as many as you like. (The higher the number, the more unlikely it is that you be able to use it.) When you arrive at the meeting, go up to the sim you think might be your contact and initiate a conversation about the chosen Interest. When your first chosen icon starts off the conversation, this is bringing in the code phrase. If the other sim replies with the next icon in your chosen sequence, they are an allied agent. (If your chosen sequence is longer than two icons, then matching icons need to continue until the correct sequence is reached.) In English, this exchange might go something like “The pelican flies at midnight” answered with “Crickets chirp in the rain.” In TS2, the exchange might go “Rocket ship” answered with “Gray alien.” Feel free to make up your own fancy code phrases to go along with the icons; making up silly code phrases is fun! +25 for every successful pair of code phrases exchanged. -10 every time the initial code phrase is not met with the return code phrase. -25 if the entire topic of conversation is rejected.

Use dead drops: Spies often communicate with or leave things for allies who they never meet. They do this by leaving things in a public place to be picked up later, leaving things visible in an area they control, or doing specific things that are publicly visible. This way, their ally can get the message without ever having to come in contact with the spy. Every day, flip a coin or roll a die to see if you need to do one of the “dead drop” type tasks listed below. Heads/evens= yes, tails/odds=no. If you get an assignment, roll a d20 or use a different randomizer of your choice to choose what your assignment is for the day.

1. Put red flowers out in front of your house (in a vase or a pot or something, not on a bush)

2. Mail something (this can be paying a bill or using the custom mail system of your choice)

3. Wear a blue shirt

4. Read the newspaper in your front lawn

5. Wear a hat

6. Play fetch

7. Go jogging

8. Buy a magazine

9. Walk to work/drive to work (whichever is not usual for you). If it is your day off, walk/drive to a community lot, again doing whichever is not usual for you.

10. Order groceries

11. Have coffee on a community lot between 4-6 pm

12. Comb/style your hair differently (do not cut or dye it – just a different part, an updo, something like that)

13. Sunbathe (either on a towel or in a recliner – if it is currently winter, this will be quite cold)

14. Water your plants between 2-3 pm

15. Dig for treasure and leave the hole for 24 hours

16. Make and play with a paper airplane, then leave it on the lawn

17. Buy and display a new lawn ornament (you can leave it on the lawn after – it won’t be new anymore, so it’s okay)

18. Leave trash on the lawn while you are at work

19. Wear sunglasses

20. Hang out in the yard with a radio playing salsa music in the yard with you

If you do not have the specific EP needed to perform one of these actions, do something similar given your particular game set up. +1 for every dead drop completed

SPECIAL CIRCUMSTANCES

These are special circumstances that may or may not come up in your game, depending on your set up and play style.

Friend or Foe?: When you identify an allied agent using a code phrase, spend 3 hours cultivating a relationship with them. If you end up with a positive relationship, you earn points. If you end up with a negative relationship, as enemies, and/or with the other sim furious at you, they will betray you. You lose points when they betray you. If you are Enemies, this blows your cover. +15 for a positive relationship. -25 points for a negative relationship.

Take a Chance on Me: If a stranger calls you up and asks you to go out (either date or outing), always accept. Flip a coin before you head out. Heads=the person is an ally, tails=the person is an enemy agent. If the person is an ally, nothing further happens – have an ordinary outing. If the person is an enemy agent, try to befriend them. If you max out the outing/date meter, you turn them into a double agent who is now secretly on your side. If you have a positive (but not maxed) or a neutral outing/date, you and your enemy go your separate ways with a new respect for each other, but without interference. If you have a negative (but not bottomed out) outing/date, this triggers the torture scenario above. If you bottom out the outing/date meter, you become the double agent who is now secretly on the enemy’s side. If you become a double agent, adjust your relationship with the enemy spy to 75/75, and change your relationships with your former allies to no more than 30/30. For all scoring purposes, your former allies are now your enemies and your former enemies are now your allies. Every time you complete a mission for your former allies, call your friendly enemy spy and chat on the phone for one game hour. +25 for a maxed outing/date meter, 0 for a neutral meter, -20 for a negative meter, -100 for a bottomed out meter.

Sim of a Thousand Faces: If you are contacted by a hobby leader, you must put on a disguise – in fact, a whole new identity (see below) – go to a community lot (or even the hobby lot), and pick a sim you don’t know to interact with in keeping with the disguise for 3 hours. At the end of the time, if your relationship with the sim is positive, your mission was a success. If your relationship is negative, this triggers the torture scenario above. If you end up as enemies/furious, your cover has been blown. +25 for a successful mission, -20 for a failure triggering torture.

Identity Elements (Choose all 20 elements randomly via whatever randomizing method you prefer)

1. Male/Female

2. Young Adult/Adult/Elder

3. Hair: Red/Blonde/Brown/Black/Custom

4. Fit/Average/Fat

5. Eyes: Brown/Dark blue/Green/Gray/Light blue/custom

6. Supernatural/Not supernatural

a. If supernatural: combination supernatural/just one type of supernatural

b. Vampire/Alien/Zombie/Witch/Bigfoot/Genie/Servo/Plantsim/Werewolf

c. If witch: Good/Neutral/Evil

7. Employed/Not employed

8. Rich/Not rich

9. Hobby: Cuisine/Film & Literature/Tinkering/Sports/Music & Dance/Fitness/Arts & Crafts/Science/Games/Nature

10. Turn On: Hair Color/Clothing/Accessories/Makeup/Fitness/Smell/Life State/Employment

a. Hair color: Red/blonde/brown/black/grey/custom/facial hair

b. Clothing: Swim wear/formal wear/underwear

c. Accessories: Glasses/hats/jewelry

d. Makeup: Makeup/full face makeup

e. Fitness: Fat/fit/average

f. Smell: Cologne/stink

g. Supernatural state: As in #6b above

h. Employment: Unemployed, employed, hard worker (Level 6+ in career)

11. Turn Off: As in #10 above. Remove the Turn On you chose from consideration.

12. Primary Interest: Environment/Food/Weather/Culture/Money/Politics/Paranormal/Health/ Fashion/Travel/Crime/Sports/Entertainment/Animals/Work/School/Toys/Sci-Fi

13. Career: Adventurer/Architecture/Artist/Athlete/Business/Culinary/Criminal/Dance/Education/ Entertainment/Show Business/Journalism/Law/Law Enforcement/Medicine/ Military/Music/Natural Scientist/Oceanographer/Paranormal/Politics/Science/Slacker (Note that Intelligence is NOT an option!)

14. Successful/Not successful

15. Pet/No pet

a. If pet: cat/dog/bird/fish

16. Taken/Available (for romantic purposes)

17. Kids/No kids

18. Favorite color: Red/Orange/Yellow/Green/Blue/Purple/Pink/Black/White/Gray/Brown

19. Conservative/Rebellious/Quirky/Sporty/Elegant/Geeky/Ordinary

20. Social group: None/Gearhead/Bohemian/Jock/Tech/Socialite

Some of these things may require custom content to pull off. (For example, if a male sim has to pass himself off as a female sim, you will probably need some form of custom content for his clothing.) Some of the things you choose will not show (such as social group), but can inform your interactions. For example, if your sim is supposed to be a Socialite, they should greet people with the Kiss Kiss Darling interaction. If your sim is supposed to have a Turn Off for red hair, they should not flirt with any redheads. If your sim has kids, they might turn the conversation topic to School or Toys. If your sim is a geeky sim with a pet fish and with the favorite color of pink, they might wear a pink shirt with a picture of a fish on it. Some of the Turn On options listed above are not available in game, or are broken. That’s okay – you’re not really changing your sim’s preferences, just having them pretend. (It’s harder that way.)

Maintain a Legend: Have a pretend relationship with another sim, preferably an allied agent. This pretend relationship has all the trappings of marriage/romance, including living together and sleeping in the same bed, but without romantic attachment. This sim may NOT be Mr. Big or The Diva. Bonus points if, when you’re playing a different household and invite the spy over, this pretend partner comes along when the spy asks “Can my friend come too?” +100 for a cover identity, +50 if the pretend partner your sim’s friend brought to a different household.

END OF THE CHALLENGE

This challenge can end in one of two ways: Either you are successful enough to eventually be brought in from the cold, or you mess up badly and can never work as a spy again.

If you make it to Elder without having your cover blown, you can come in from the cold. You can drop your cover identity, and even take a job in Intelligence if you like. (This represents getting a nice desk job or training new recruits.) Alternatively, you can relax and enjoy retirement without any fear of anyone torturing or killing you. You do have to move to a completely different house. +500 for honorably coming in from the cold.

If your cover is blown once, you lose all your points, lose your job, and lose any Rewards or inventory you may have earned. You have to move to a new house with a new cover identity (use the Sim of a Thousand Faces chart to help pick this) and start a new job. Your new job cannot be in your old career track. You are immediately placed in Hard Mode, if you weren’t already there. -200 points for being forced to complete the challenge on Hard Mode because your cover was blown (Yes, this means you might start over with negative points.)

If your cover is blown a second time, you are not cut out for the spy life. Flip a coin or roll a die to decide what happens to you.

1. Heads/evens=You are forcibly retired. You move to a new house with a new identity. You can never see your family again (if you had one), and you have to get a new job that is not in any prior career path, in Intelligence, or in Law Enforcement.

2. Tails/odds=You are found out and killed by the enemy. You lose all your points. Kill your sim via the method of your choice. Hey, being a spy is dangerous!

SCORING

+1 for every dead drop completed

+5 for every time your sim is invited on an outing/date with a known sim

+5 per covert contact

+5 for every successful completion of the “iffy things” requirement above.

+25 bonus points for completion of the “iffy things” requirement with five different sims

+10 for every vacation destination greeting mastered

+10 for learning to teleport via meditation

You can only learn to teleport via one method, not both.

+10 for every time you send a message via an innocuous object

+10 if you faithfully complete the driving requirements

-10 If you have not completed it faithfully

+10 if you faithfully complete the hacking requirements

-10 If you have not completed it faithfully

+10 for each successful courier mission

+20 if you leave the couriered item on a community lot without handing it off to a contact.

+10 if the item in question didn’t belong to you in the first place.

+15 for every time your sim is invited on an outing/date with an unknown sim

+15 for every time you successfully take covert pictures

+15 for every time your sim withstands torture

+20 for every time your sim successfully follows someone

+20 for learning to teleport from the ninja

You can only learn to teleport via one method, not both.

+25 for every successful pair of code phrases exchanged

-10 every time the initial code phrase is not met with the return code phrase

-25 if the entire topic of conversation is rejected

+50 for successful romance/seduction of Mr. Big/The Diva

+25 bonus points for a one-sided love

+50 bonus points for a romance with the opposite of your autonomous gender preference.

+200 points for voluntarily completing the challenge on Hard Mode

-200 points for being forced to complete the challenge on Hard Mode because your cover was blown

+500 for honorably coming in from the cold

Friend or Foe? scenario

+15 for a positive relationship

-25 points for a negative relationship

Take a Chance On Me scenario

+25 for a maxed outing/date meter

0 for a neutral meter or a positive but not maxed meter

-20 for a negative meter

-100 for a bottomed out meter

Sim of a Thousand Faces scenario

+25 for a successful mission

-20 for a failure triggering torture

Maintain a Legend scenario

+100 for a cover identity

+50 if the pretend partner is the “bring a friend” at a different household when your sim goes to visit

#sims 2 #sims 2 challenges

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beverlyr0ad · 6 years

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crimes of grindelwald thoughts

alright obvious spoilers not that it matters bc i have one follower lmao but !! i need somewhere to scream abt this movie

first of all i love jacob and newt so much. best parts of this movie honestly i love them and i want them to be happy

but to be fair i actually rlly rlly enjoyed watching this movie!! like,, there are a looot of things i dont understand about it and i have no idea how they happened or why theyre happening but thats Okay i would still recommend everyone watch it! its so good!!!

good things:

- grindelwald !! i mean,, no hes not a good thing but i really liked how they wrote his character. like i can UNDERSTAND the power he has over people and how hes manipulating them. hes really not just a Voldemort 2.0 and i respect that a lot bc thats not what an entirely different villain should be like. but casting issues and all aside i really liked this

- i also liked the interaction between leta lestrange and dumbledore that was some good stuff and the actors were rlly good too !!! - i like the direction queenie is going in. i mean i dont actually of course but it seems realistic and i think its important and its good character development n stuff so hhh hope that works out later tho !! i am Suspense

- jacob walked into that movie and i was like !!!!!!!!! :DDDDDDDDDDDDD i love him so much and it was rlly nice to see him back even if i dont think it was that neat to have him lose his memory of everything that happened for significance and in this movie have everything go like WHOOMP hes back but i uhhhh loved it anyway so this is not a complaint its a good thing - i still loved newt and having a good main character makes the whole movie a better watch in general. ive seen sequels where i just Cant get attatched to the new characters but wow i didnt really have much of a problem with that here

- it was also never boring and i really just loved n enjoyed this movie a lot!!! okay hhh bad things/things that i personally disliked:

- ive seen different opinions on this but??? what was that blood pact????? what are u doing??????????????? i cant even be coherent properly so here are the main reasons that was rlly dumb

1- w-who does that in a romantic relationship ever :o and yes jkr has literally said dumbledore n grindelwald were in LOVE HELLO feel free to correct me if im wrong on anything but if ur gonna say it u should show it,,,, Continuity Please. anyway separate issue but if u love someone youre not gonna be like “hey lets make SURE we dont fight each other ever” because youll trust that the other person?? isnt gonna fight u???!!!???? im

2- thats literally not the reason he “cannot move against grindelwald” okay like it shouldnt be. this conversation literally happens in dh and dumbledore says he was scared of facing what rlly happened when ariana died!! there was no actual physical thing stopping him!!! the only acceptable justification is that he doesnt want to face this ghosts of his past and that moment and he is SCARED okay so COME ON give dumbledore his faults! hes scared of his past and that IS the reason!!

3- wait how did grindelwald, aberforth, and albus fight if they had already entered a blood pact. like i dont think albus would aim for his own brother EVER but could he even attack grindelwald if they had a blood pact?? not sure how this works lol but who was he aiming for then??? just firing everywhere randomly without intention cause that sounds,,, significantly harder to believe and makes that scene loads messier esp if grindelwald couldnt aim for albus either so

4- the blood pact was so frickin unnecessary im sobbing. like there was the scene where its all like “oh some say you were as close as brothers” and dumbledore is like “oh we were closer than brothers...” and im like OK! the little scene in the air doesnt explicitly reveal anything either so thats ok but the closer than brothers line was rlly revealing for me. at least for like two minutes and then dumbledore looked in the mirror and saw himself making a blood pact w grindelwald. like ok is That what u meant by closer than brothers bc thats what everythings pointing to but it shouldnt be and i.............ugh

5- im honestly just kind of hhhhhhhhhhhh. i can concede that the blood pact might be significant in later films and i look forward to watching them! but. at the same time i. wish that if you were going to say dumbledore was gay it would actually be explicitly referenced in the movie, instead of dancing around that and dropping it in hints and pieces that fans of the series who know this information will understand and others can just dismiss as friendship! there were So Many good places in this movie to include this fact (altho feel free to disagree w me haha) and i think that not including this fact was honestly tiring.

- nagini...........obv this isnt a huge problem bc idk where her story will go next n it might develop n become important but as of rn, i have no idea what her role in this movie is. i wonder if her reappearance in the harry potter series will actually be of significance and if itll be explained how she will end up under servitude to voldemort bc i genuinely dont understand right now. it just seems like a cameo to draw attention in the trailer ghgdjh

- leta lestrange’s death didnt feel right or impactful and im sad . definitely a huge opinion here but it felt like a mandatory character snuff to make the movie sad and ghdsjgfh oh well :(

- little continuity issues?? dumbledore being DADA professor instead of transfiguration bc Boggarts Are Important For Foreshadowing. also how is mcgonagall an adult or actually how is she even alive and um of course the fact that this movie doesnt confirm what jkr has said about dumbledore and grindelwald beforehand.

- im actually going to totally repeat myself bc this deserves a separate point umm why arent dumbledore and grindelwald actually shown as in love with each other as young men. its completely relevant to the movie and its not hard to put it in there instead of the bLOOD PACT (ask anyone irl ive been screaming abt the blood pact ever since i came out of that movie). anyway i know david yates said he wouldnt be including that as part of the movie as fans are aware of that aNyway but its not that hard to understand. people are asking for actual representation?? not smt vague??? because this is just here to Please People. if u refuse to see this ship, ure just gonna see them as having a friendship! maybe u havent heard about what jkr said or maybe ure choosing to ignore it bc,, idk that says smt about u, or maybe another reason idk! but if u go into this knowing they were In Love and hoping to see confirmation of dumbledore being canonically gay, youre going to hear that “oh, we were more than brothers” line and be like oh yeah we been knew, or more seriously like hey! maybe we’re getting a canon confirmation, not just floaty young people leaning towards each other! like when he looked in the mirror i was like okay This Is It this is gna be confirmation but then it wasnt oop. it was the !!! bloooood paaact !!! which means that people could interpret the “closer than brothers” line as meaning oh we done did a blood pact that means we blood related look at us go! Wow! so this is basically just a half azzed attempt at pleasing people w stereotypical viewpoints and people happy to see representation. hmmmmmmmmmm.. (psst if u actually ship older dumbledore n grindelwald tho What Are You Doing Stop !! thats not a healthy relationship, grindelwald is an awful person and dumbledore deserves to grow from the person he was before!!! he deserves so much better!!! im not saying to ship them but im saying that if we’re gonna say they were in love as young men and if we are going to confirm that dumbledore is gay well,,, lets put that in canon pls!!!! we need canon representation but we dont need to pretend this ship is healthy or good bc its representation either. this isnt shipping this is asking to acknowledge that dumbledore was gay and in love with grindelwald and its confirmed that grindelwald was in love with him too. in the place the story of tcog is now, that relationship is not ever going to happen again and if u actually think it is ure suffering from some next-level delusion. just be definitive and acknowledge that your characters are LGBT tho pls!! u said they were!!! actually i would be so much happier to see a Happy And Healthy LGBT Pairing can we have that? please?)

- big spoiler but hOW IS CREDENCE ALBUS’ BROTHER WHAT IS HAPPENING DKFJDKSH i need to separate my thoughts again

1- AGE DIFFERENCE........apparently dumbledore is like 46 in this movie right?? credence doesnt look over 20. okay percival dumbledore is put in azkaban before albus starts school right?? so the maximum age albus can be is 11. now im gonna say that kendra was not having any more kids w anyone else after that incident fs so the oldest albus can be when ariana is born is 12, leaving room for some other stuff okay. ALBUS AND CREDENCE DONT LOOK LIKE THEY HAVE A 12 YEAR AGE GAP WHAT IS HAPPENINF

2- i saw people theorizing that credence is ariana’s son and NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO PLS NO

3- not an actual issue but i thought grindelwald said his name was berrylius dumbledore which i later remembered as berrylium dumbledore and anyway thank god for the internet

4- okay at this point i cant tell if this has just been brought in for shock value or smt like. is this relevant to the plot. is grindelwald even telling the truth. w-why did the movie end there. help....... i think thats it but i do want to say that i respect the rights of the creator jkr to do whatever she wants w these characters. its her world! but i can have a whole bunch of opinions n feelings about this movie and still support it. after all, i love harry potter and the whole wizarding world w my whole heart.

did anyone even read that LOOOL that was so long sorry

#feel free to disagree w me tho #im completely open to hear other opinions #and mine are subject to change anyway #i used so much !!!!! in this sorry #crimes of grindelwald #harry potter #hp #fbawtft #fantastic beasts #tcog #tcog spoilers #crimes of grindelwald spoilers #spoilers #hp spoilers #fantastic beasts spoilers #tcog opinions #crimes of grindelwald opinions

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happy-meo · 7 years

Text

Masquerade 3.2: Arranged

Will love overcome the fate of being arranged? Or will love arrange its own fate?

SPOILER ALERT!! If you haven’t, please read the main stories of this series: MASQUERADE& Masquerade II & Masquerade III !! As well as the connected story: Silver Spoon. (FYI: This also contains important information leading into Masquerade IV.)

Summary: With your upbringings being significantly different, the time has come where it becomes an obstacle in your relationship. Jungkook’s parents are forcing him to participate in arranged meetings to stabilize his future, and the future of their family’s company. Where will your relationship lie at the end of it all?

Jungkook x Reader (ft. Jimin, Hoseok, Jin, Yoongi and their lovely female leads) Cop!Kook/ Police!Kook, Host au Fluff, Rom-Com, Slight smut

A/N: As said above, I’m setting up the stage for incoming Masquerade IV mwehehe, and I figured it was time for a little reunion of my lovely characters ^_^ Enjoy ~

"Ugh." Jungkook grunted as he threw himself on top of you as you lay flat on your stomach on your bed.

"Well hello to you too." You hummed as you continued typing away on your laptop. "Rough night at work?"

Jungkook sighed, "That I can handle."

You nudged him off of you so you could talk face-to-face, putting your laptop away. "Parents again?"

Jungkook frowned, showing you that you had hit the nail on the head.

"What did they say?" You whispered.

Jungkook averted his eyes timidly.

"Hey." You grabbed Jungkook's hand. "You promised to tell me the truth."

"But they're being stupid." Jungkook scrunched his face.

It had been a few months since you and Jungkook became "official". He hadn't exactly told his parents about you, but they seemed to be intensely invested in pairing him off with someone of status and wealth. Long gone were their hopes of Jungkook taking over the family business, but now they seemed to have settled on an alternate plan, which included marrying Jungkook off to a rich heiress. He had attempted to mention many times that he had a girlfriend, but quite aware of their son's very limited ability to interact romantically with females, they just brushed it off as him trying to get out of it.

Obviously, you weren't a rich heiress nor did you have a name for yourself, having just recently been promoted to a full-time employee. So Jungkook always seemed to sugarcoat his stories about his parents around you, conscious of how it would make you feel. But you weren't a fool though. You had read enough books, seen enough movies, experienced enough of society to know that something like this might eventually become an obstacle while dating Jungkook. But you hadn't expected Jungkook to react like this. You had expected the chic, confident man who had defended his passion to be a police officer adamantly.

You smiled as you outstretched your arms, and he fell into your torso with another big sigh. Running your fingers through his chestnut brown hair, you spoke.

"You're torn."

Jungkook remained silent, but you knew that meant you were right. Not that you doubted his feelings for you, but you had come to realize that Jungkook truly cared about his parents' opinions and approval about this matter more so than his career choice. So he was stuck.

And you knew he did nothing because he was praying his parents would eventually stop. But with each passing day, they only became more aggressive about the arranged meetings while Jungkook's excuses became more ridiculous. Soon enough, a war was once again waged between him and his parents, but it left both parties miserable.

"Jungkook..." You felt him melt into you.

"No. Don't give me a lecture." he groaned as he embraced you tighter. "I don't want to make amends or beg for them to stop. That's just childish."

"I was just going to say that maybe...you should give it a try."

You felt him still and look up at you, surprised. "What? You're kidding me."

You chuckled and shifted. "Okay so hear me out first."

He sat up, pouting slightly. "I can't believe you're telling me to date after wanting to keep me all to yourself. Take responsibility woman!"

"You're so cute when you're pouting, my little coconut." You squeezed his cheeks.

"Let me hear your solution, nerd." He flicked your forehead.

"Okay." You grinned and crossed your legs, smacking your knees firmly.

Jungkook chuckled, knowing it was the pose you usually took when your gears were turning. He found it incredibly endearing, but he knew you got annoyed whenever he interrupted, so he simply grabbed your hands attentively.

"So remember how you just messed up all the internships with companies they sent you to?"

He snorted. "Yeah, that was fun."

"Then eventually your parents got tired and gave you an ultimatum. One last company and if it doesn't work out, then they'll accept it, remember?"

"Yeah, of course I remember." Jungkook leaned forward and kissed you lightly.

"Thennn..." you smirked as you tickled his chin playfully. "you met a beautiful, captivating co-intern that changed your life forever ~"

Jungkook scoffed, "I changed my life. She just happened to be there when it was all happening."

You squinted at him, displeased. "Fine. I'll give you the company issue, but I helped with your relationship status."

He laughed and nodded. "I can't argue with that."

"Okay so back to my suggestion --"

Jungkook captured your lips deeply, stopping you mid-sentence. He knew you hated it, but he loved pushing your buttons.

"Jungkook! Let me fini--"

He didn't let you once again, so you stuck your hands under his arms and tickled him. He cackled and wiggled, easily holding your hands down to stop your attack.

"Truce. Truce." he grinned happily.

You smiled playfully.

"So you're telling me to go on all these dates and be a completely horrible, un-charming person until my parents give me an ultimatum?" he raised an eyebrow.

"Well...yes." you shrugged.

"You do know that it took me years and a whole lot of companies to get to that point." He looked at you intently. "I don't want to go through that, and I don't want to put you through that."

Your lips turned up warmly at his genuine affection. "Then how about you give them the ultimatum?"

"What do you mean?" he tilted his head.

"You put your foot forward first. Tell them you refuse to go through with this matchmaking, but if they continue to insist, you're willing to go to one. Just one. Tell your parents to go through their lists and files, do the interviews or whatever rich people do to pick a match. Pick their best candidate to put forth. Someone they're confident will suit you. Make them promise that they'll drop the subject if that doesn't work out."

"Will they even buy that?" Jungkook questioned.

"Look, Kooks." You caressed his cheek. "I know your parents love you so, so much. If they didn't, they wouldn't be forcing this in the first place. They want you to do what you love without having to worry about financial restraints. That's why they want you to marry into more wealth. But of course the last thing they want is to lose you. They'll take the bait."

"How can you be so fearless?" Jungkook chuckled as he covered your hand with his. "I've never met someone who would tell their boyfriends to try to date someone they might have to marry."

You leaned forward to whisper, "Well we all know I'm the only one who can handle your ass."

Jungkook bit his lip and pressed his body forward until he had you on your back. "And we all know I'm the only one who can eat your ass until you're screaming bloody murder."

"Hm?" You smirked, unbuttoning his uniform. "I don't think you've reached that level quite yet, Mr. Jeon."

"Well I've been holding back. Can't have anyone calling the cops." he teased.

"Well the joke would be on them." You grinned as Jungkook pressed his lips hungrily onto yours.

"I'll do it." He breathed. "For us."

You nodded with a gentle smile. "I'll be here waiting."

And so the day came for his firm stand.

"I can't believe you brought in gear from your police department for this." Your voice drawled into his ear.

You knew he was extremely nervous and so in his desperation, he shoved police undercover gear at you, begging you to help him with his confrontation. Obviously, you couldn't abandon him when he asked so earnestly. So here you were, speaking into a microphone while watching from a camera pin he had put on so you could monitor his movements, whilst in your pajamas.

"You know I could get used to this. I could keep a list of all the girls that hit on you during the day."

"Not the time." he hissed.

You remained silent; your attempt at lightening the mood failing.

Jungkook sat with his hands clasped together in deep, serious thought. He was running through the scenario in his mind, garnering his complete concentration to pull this off without a hitch. His parents tiptoed into their dining room cautiously, unsure of what to expect from their son.

"So it seems you've finally come to your senses and agreed?" His mom questioned.

"No." Jungkook opened his eyes to look at them firmly, taking them by surprising.

"No?"

"Just one." Jungkook stood up and dramatically slammed his hand onto the table.

"Okay, take the dramatics down Mister."

His face faltered, and he hurriedly pulled his hand off the table. He cleared his throat to regain his composure.

"I will only agree to one of these arranged meetings. I'm not a kid anymore so I'm not going to waste my time trying to rebel secretly until you give in like last time. I don't like fighting like this so I'm putting my foot down on this situation." He straightened up confidently. "So it's one date. If it doesn't work out, then you need to leave my love life alone. Got it?"

"No don't ask! Answer yourself and walk away."

Jungkook nodded and awkwardly clapped his hands together, "Got it. That's all I wanted to say."

He spun around to walk away nervously, never having stood his ground so boldly and openly in front of his parents. They also seemed to be in a state of shock and awe because he was met with silence and flabbergasted expressions. Before he reached the front door, he heard his mother answer.

"Fine. Just one! But you really need to make an effort! None of your antics!" she yelled out, her voice laced with worry and hesitation.

Jungkook smiled and simply walked out the door. Well, that was easy.

"See? What'd I tell you? I knew they'd agree to it."

He chuckled and looked up to the sky. "Your genius really creeps me out, you know?"

"And that is why you love me."

He nodded, his lips curling up fondly. "True."

"Oh my gosh. I can't believe I'm actually going through with this. Oh my goodness. Why did I listen to you?" Jungkook paced your living room as you tried to finish up some stuff to send to Jimin and Hoseok.

"You listened to me because this is the best solution to stop your moping and your fighting with your parents." You stated, quite over his constant complaints.

It had already been a week and half since his parents agreed to his ultimatum. Jungkook had been fine during that interval, having pushed the issue in the back of his mind. Until he received details of his meeting from his mother, which caused him to breakdown. Every night he would argue with you and himself, trying to plot ways to get out of it, but you would always straighten him back up.

"But a GIRL, Y/N. A GIRL! I HAVE TO MEET A GIRL!" he bellowed incredulously.

You hit send on your file and shut your laptop, raising an eyebrow at him. "And what am I? Not a girl?"

He exhaled, "You know what I mean."

"No, I don't. Mind clarifying what exactly you take me for?" You pursed your lips. "You took me on a couple of perfectly fine dates."

"But that's cause it was a teaching opportunity." He lunged into you, knocking you down onto the couch with his sheer weight on top of you. "Plus you were easy to get along with."

You peered at him. "I recall you running away with 2 large jugs of milk when we ran into each other at the supermarket."

"Okay, maybe not right away." he frowned.

You sighed and cupped his cheek as he hovered over you. "Jungkook, this girl is a person like you and like me. Who knows if she's being forced into this too? Get to know them. You're not actually going on a date...unless your plan is to leave me for some rich heiress."

Jungkook chuckled. "I mean, we'd be set for life if I married rich. Obviously, I'd let her know you were my mistress. We come in a set."

You shook your head and patted his cheek. "There's my little Gold Mask."

He inhaled sharply at the mention. "Oh my gosh! That's it!"

"What?"

"The big corporation party I'm supposed to meet her in is a MASQUERADE PARTY!" he jumped off the couch.

"Yes? You knew that."

"But it's not so scary anymore if I'm behind my Gold Mask." he grinned giddily. "I'll just do it like I used to."

You glared at him briefly then relaxed your features, shrugging. "Do it however you want then."

He pouted, "Yah! How could you be so relaxed?"

You pulled off your glasses and yawned. "Cause of how you were about to pee your pants at the thought of having to meet a girl a few minutes ago."

Jungkook grumbled. "I'll show you. I can seduce this girl."

You rolled your eyes. "Sure, sure."

"I can too!" He huffed and went to grab a jacket.

"Where are you going?" You tilted your head.

"The gym!" He snapped as he made his way out of your apartment.

Your lips curled up as he shut the door behind him angrily. "My boyfriend is so simple."

You knew making it into a competition would make him less nervous. You would rather see him fired up than sluggish any day. And if it was one thing you were good at, it was psychological warfare.

"Now," You stood up and stretched. "I should change out of these sweats and tease him when he gets back as retaliation."

Jungkook froze as he stepped into the apartment and found you lying down on your side, reading on the couch. Usually that would not be such an odd occurrence, but you were currently wearing a satin nightgown that didn't hide any of your assets. He dropped his gym bag and made his way to you, ripping the book out of your grasp.

"Hey! Jung--" Your complaints were cut off by his lips hungrily on yours.

"You're teasing me." he growled.

"Am I?" you smirked. "I didn't think the Golden Host was capable of being so easily seduced."

"You know I love that on you." He bit his lip, and easily lifted you up from the couch, flipping you around so that you were straddling his lap.

"And you know," You rubbed his arms, freshly hardened from his intense workout. You traced the veins down his forearms. "I love when you come from the gym."

He pulled your waist forward so that you two could make out again. You grinded into his hardness, making him moan breathily. Then you quickly retracted and latched yourself off his lap, leaving him stunned.

"What in the world?" he breathed.

You smirked, teasingly.

"Go take a shower. You gave in too easily. What kind of Gold Mask are you?"

He snorted as he rushed towards you, easily throwing you over his shoulder as you squealed.

"I've been going easy on you nowadays, huh?" he smacked your ass. "I'll show you why you couldn't get enough of me before."

You grinned, happy to see him confident once again.

He gently lay you down on the bed and pulled off his t-shirt in one swift motion. Your eyes roamed his chiseled torso, causing you to lick your lips. He noticed your gaze and he smirked.

"That's all it took, huh?"

"I mean I guess you're pleasing to the eye." You shrugged nonchalantly. "But can you deliver?"

Jungkook chucked his sweatpants and boxers to the side, freeing his strained cock.

"I'll show you how I deliver, babygirl." His eyes darkened. "Open those legs for me."

You smiled as you happily accepted him climbing between your legs. He crawled to place a chaste kiss on your lips before anything, and you took the opportunity to hold his face gently.

"There's my man." you whispered.

He grinned as he captured your lips deeply; all the while he pulled off the thin fabric that separated his bare body from yours.

"You won't be whispering much longer, love." he hissed. "I'll have you screaming my name."

"Make me, Jeon Jungkook." You bit his lip then went to press kisses down his neck.

"God, I love you." He chuckled as he dipped two fingers into you immediately, causing you to groan loudly.

"You what?!" Jungkook stared at you in horror a few days later.

"I told you the other day. I can't make it to the corporation Masquerade party 'cause I have plans with my family." You were washing the dishes.

"But ...no! You can't not be there when I have this arranged date!" he bellowed.

"So you could use me as way to get out of it?" You chuckled. "Your parents will be there Jungkook. I hardly think it'd be appropriate to introduce me like that. Plus part of the ultimatum was that you'd look like you actually were trying on this date."

"Can't you hang out with your family another time?" He pouted as he embraced you, nuzzling his head into the crook of your neck. "I need you there. I promise I won't use you. I just want you there to keep me sane. Seeing you from afar would be enough. Plus you know I feel so stuffy with anything company-related."

"I know. I'm sorry." You spun around and dried your hands on his shirt, which caused him to scrunch his face. But he didn't let go of you. You patted his chest warmly and gazed at him intently. "But Kooks, you're a big boy. Show your parents you can handle this situation properly and maturely. Then they'll stop treating you like a child who needs them to keep looking out for your future."

He exhaled and rested his chin on top of your head. "I hate that you're always right."

You grinned and embraced him tightly. "I know you can do it."

"I can't believe you'd abandon your boyfriend in his time of need." He playfully made sobbing noises.

You smacked his butt, laughing. "You're such a big baby. I can't with you."

He chuckled and tightened his arms around you. "It's for us, isn't it?"

"Hm?"

"I have to get them off my back so I can finally introduce them to you, and they'll take me... and us seriously." he hummed. "That no matter your background, I'm going to choose you so they have to deal with it."

You smiled.

"You'll pick out my suit for me at least, right?" Jungkook separated your bodies slightly so he could take a good look at your face.

"Of course." you brushed his shoulders. "I have to make sure you give Park Jimin a run for his money."

Jungkook grinned widely.

"Okay, Jungkook. You can do this." He hummed as he looked at himself in front of the mirror.

On your suggestion, he had pulled his bangs up with some gel, exposing his forehead and his sharp eyebrows. Then with renewed confidence, he once again placed his Gold Mask over his eyes.

"It's been awhile, Nochu." He grinned at his reflection. "And hopefully the last time we meet again."

With that, he stepped out of the bathroom and into the lobby of the Grand Hotel the corporation ball was being held in.

"Ohohoho. I'd know that mask anywhere." Jimin cackled as he threw an arm around Jungkook.

"I see you still kept your ancient relic." Jungkook teased as he tapped on Jimin's infamous red mask.

"It is not ancient!" Jimin gasped, offended.

"There, there. Don't start a war with the muscular child." Receptionist handed Jimin a drink.

"A red mask too. Nice." Jungkook grabbed his own drink from a passing waiter and toasted glasses with the Receptionist.

"If there was a female Masquerade Club, she'd definitely be my equivalent." Jimin whispered proudly.

"Wouldn't doubt it." Jungkook chuckled. "She surely has a lot of male customers at Burlesque."

"Jungkook! Long time no see!" Hoseok beamed as he and Silver walked to them hand-in-hand.

"Oh my gosh. Nostalgia." Silver sighed as she looked at Black Mask and Red Mask endearingly.

"Remembering all the good times we had, hm?" Jimin wiggled his eyebrows.

Hoseok clicked his tongue and glared at his best friend.

"Well, well, well....look who decided to show up." Jimin beamed suddenly and shoved his drink to his confused girlfriend before sprinting towards the person currently entering the lobby area.

The others watched as he lunged onto the unsuspecting person with obnoxious blonde hair and a mint green and silver mask.

"MINNNN YOONGGIII!" he bellowed excitedly.

"Oh my gosh, Park Jimin. Get off of me." Yoongi huffed, embarrassed.

"Where is she? Where is she? Where is she?" Jimin bounced excitedly.

"Jimin!" A female wearing a matching mask called out soon after.

"My Farm Girl!" Jimin raced to her and spun her around enthusiastically. "It's been ages."

"I know. I'm so proud of you for staying in a relationship this long." She squeezed his hand, dramatically clutching her chest.

"But I mean look at you, all engaged and stuff." Jimin teased as Farm Girl showed off her ring.

Yoongi smiled subtly, trying not to show how happy he was she was flaunting her engagement ring.

"Well you know, he practically threw it at me and ran out of the bedroom." She teased.

"Hey! That's not how it happened!" Yoongi bellowed.

"You have to say hi to the others. They're all over there." Jimin gestured for the others to come join him, and they all exchanged greetings.

"My little Kookie ~ look how you've grown up." Farm Girl smiled fondly as she patted his cheek. "It seemed like yesterday you were giving me a headache at my company."

Jungkook giggled. "And that's why you and Yoongi-hyung sent me to Seoul."

"We figured you'd do well under another headache of ours." She winked as she glanced at Jimin.

"Well, I'm proud of you two for actually coming out and showing yourselves." Jimin grinned.

"Well, we had ulterior motives." Farm Girl confessed.

Yoongi grumbled under his breath.

"Oh holy hell." Jungkook groaned as he noticed the appearance of a very familiar tall, lean man wearing a purple mask donned with musical notes.

"Hey there fellow Chairman candidates." Namjoon walked over and ruffled Farm Girl's hair fondly. Then he and Yoongi proceeded to stare at each other intensely for a few seconds. Afterwards, he finally noticed Jungkook beside him. "Jungkook. Fancy seeing you here."

"I am still one of the company's biggest investors." Jungkook crossed his arms defensively. "And my family still is a large part of the corporation. So why wouldn't I be here?"

"Whoa, put the claws away boys." Receptionist stepped in. "We can head into the Main Banquet Hall now."

"Wanna escort me too?" Farm Girl smiled as she offered her other arm to Jungkook.

Yoongi chuckled and nodded as Jungkook glanced at him for permission.

"Wow, look at all my arm candies." she giggled.

"How about I take one for my own?" Namjoon swooped in and threw an arm around Yoongi. "Can't go in solo."

"No! Don't touch me!" Yoongi snapped and flailed his arms, but Namjoon was already dragging him chummily ahead.

Jungkook and Farm Girl laughed at the humorous situation of Yoongi one-sidedly bickering with Namjoon, who easily towered over him.

"Who came up with your mask designs?" Jungkook questioned. "It's a very unique color."

Farm Girl chuckled. "Yoongi wanted to re-dye his hair mint again, but I was against it. Especially since the Chairman, all the sponsors, investors, and the big shots will be here tonight. So I appeased him by saying we could wear mint masks instead."

"It looks nice. It's different." Jungkook complimented.

"Thanks." She patted his arm. "You've definitely grown up."

�� "I'm trying." His lips curled up.

"For yourself? Or for someone else?" she eyed him curiously.

"A little of both." he blushed.

"Ohh ~" she nudged him.

"Well, you should probably get back to Yoongi." Jungkook pointed as the man was squaring up in front of Namjoon.

"Oh lord. Leo!" Farm Girl called out.

Jungkook flinched as a stoic faced man appeared beside Farm Girl in a flash. "Yes?"

"What in the world?" he gasped.

"Take care of that will you?" She sighed.

Leo nodded curtly before striding towards Yoongi and pulling him away from the self-created fray.

She rubbed her temples. "Anyway, I'll see you around. Enjoy yourself, okay?"

Jungkook smiled and waved as she hurried off to scold her fiancée. The music began amidst the chatter. As always with these gatherings, food was scarce and it was all about communicating and networking. Luckily, he had stuffed himself with a hefty meal to make sure he was able to make it through most of the night. A few people made their way towards the dance floor with their partners though, and began gently dancing to the slow classical music. He glanced around, wondering which of these disguised faces was the woman his parents chose for him.

As if on cue, someone tugged at his suit.

"Um...uh Mr. Jeon?"

He blinked at the familiar voice. "Yes?"

"It's me." She pulled down her mask shyly.

"Miss Puppy!" Jungkook called out.

She blushed and nodded. "I'm happy you remember me."

"Of course. My friend, Tae, mentions you here and there." Jungkook smiled.

"Oh does he?" her lips curled up.

Then Jungkook froze. "Wait. Did my parents talk to you?"

"Oh." She looked around. "Yeah, they did."

"Oh."

Well, this wasn't bad. It'd be easy to explain why things wouldn't work out for them. He kind of knew her already, so things might not be so awkward. He could make a convincing attempt to try to enjoy their time together this evening so his parents could see.

"Um..." Jungkook scratched his head. "Would you like to dance then?"

She was visibly flustered and stammered. "M-m-me? D-d-dance? Oh no...I'm not very--"

Jungkook smiled warmly, slightly reminded of his old self, and grabbed her hand. "I'll lead. Don't worry."

He could feel her shaking a little out of nervousness, but after a few seconds of swaying, she felt more at ease.

"Do you come to these often?"

"Not so much. I get a little nervous and shy. But I've been trying to get out there."

"Same here." Jungkook separated slightly so he could take a good look at her then gasped slightly.

"What? Mr. Jeon? Is there something on my face?" she flustered.

He shook his head frantically then pulled her into his chest, in panic. He knew that mask. He had seen this exact mask at the Club. His eyes closed, trying to recollect when and with whom. Then all of a sudden, he felt something hit the back of his head.

"Hm?" He glanced down and found a small piece of bread on the ground.

He followed the line of vision, just in time to catch a glimpse of pink tiptoe-ing away.

And that's when it hit him.

Immediately, he let go and stepped back.

Miss Puppy was Jin's longest running customer. The one who had always come in crying and upset about her latest terrible date and/or break-up. The one he had a soft spot for.

"Mr. Jeon?" She looked at him, puzzled.

"Oh my gosh." He hurriedly covered his face, afraid she would recognize his mask. "I-I'm so sorry. I don't think this'll work out."

"Wait, what? We were just dancing?" she blinked.

"I- uh- I know my parents arranged you to meet with me, but um yeah, I --" Jungkook bowed. "I have to check something real quick."

"What? Your parents?" she tilted her head. "They never arranged for us to meet. All they said was hi to me earlier...." She responded meekly as he sprinted off behind the column.

"You!" Jungkook pounced.

"Ahhhh!" The man hiding behind the pillar spazzed out and screamed loudly.

"It IS you! Hyung!" Jungkook beamed at the familiar figure in front of him. "What're you doing here?"

"I don't know who you're talking about." Jin averted his eyes and attempted to walk away.

"Oh please. You threw a piece of bread at me." Jungkook snorted.

"I didn't."

"Yes, you did."

"No, I didn't."

"Yes, you did."

"I'm not doing this right now, Jeon Jungkook!"

"Ha! It IS you, Jin!"

"Shhh!" Jin covered his mouth. "I'm working right now."

"A hotel waiter. Hott." Jungkook smirked. "You didn't use your Club mask."

"Well, this is my other place of work." Jin looked around. "We had to wear the standard white masks."

"But you still added a hint of pink on yours." Jungkook tapped on the small pink sticker on the side of his mask.

Jin frowned.

"You know your client is here." He smirked.

"I do. I don't appreciate you googly eye-ing her when you have a girlfriend." Jin hissed.

"Somebody's jealous." Jungkook teased and started poking his hyung.

"No! Stop! I'm ticklish, remember?" Jin began wiggling his body and fighting back laughter. He strongly grabbed onto Jungkook's hands, trying to stop him.

"Jungkook?"

Jin and Jungkook froze.

"Hi, mom." Jungkook grinned weakly as he slowly let go of Jin's hands.

His mom eyed the two of them worriedly. Jin coughed and bowed, making his escape swiftly.

"I didn't know you were close to the waiting staff." she blinked.

"Oh. He's an old friend is all." Jungkook waved it off. "I met your arranged date, but I don't think it's going to work out. We danced already and--"

"What? But she's not even here yet." His mom cut him off.

"Wait. What? She's not?" Jungkook looked at her in shock.

"Yeah, she should be coming soon. She just called to say she was pulling in at the valet. So come." She grabbed her son's hands warmly. "I think you'll really like this girl, Jungkook. I really want you to try to get to know her."

Jungkook sighed sullenly.

"She is absolutely astounding. She got recommendations and high regards from FIVE of the CEOs. They're all heads of the biggest branches too. 3 of them are the Chairman candidates and..."

Jungkook tuned his mother out, mentally preparing himself for this dreaded meeting. He preoccupied himself with the thought of coming home to you after all this was done. Throwing on his favorite warm hoodie and playing video games with you as you sat in his embrace. His lips curled up.

"Jungkook." His mother sternly called, probably long since aware he was not paying attention to what she was saying.

"Yes!" he straightened up obediently.

"Oh for goodness sake. I was telling you a little about her to give you the upper hand, but you weren't paying attention." She frowned as she fixed his suit up. "Now she's going to come in soon. Your dad is escorting her. Please stay still and be nice."

"I'm always nice." he grinned.

His mother gave him a knowing look. "Now I know it'd be awkward if we introduced you two so we asked two other people to do the introductions so it's more natural."

"Who?" Jungkook raised an eyebrow.

"Sadly, us." Yoongi appeared with Farm Girl beside him.

Jungkook spotted the tall, lanky man that had pulled Yoongi away earlier, nodding his head to the beat of the music behind them. His face still not changing expression, but for some reason he seemed very into the song.

"CEO Min." Jungkook's mother bowed. "And almost CEO Min."

Farm Girl smiled warmly as she returned the gesture. "Mrs. Jeon."

"Please take care of my son." She smiled before scurrying away.

"What's the meaning of this?" Jungkook furrowed his brow.

"Shh..." Farm Girl put her index finger over his mouth. "Jungkook, let me introduce to you, your arranged date."

"I don't--"

"Just shut up and turn around!" Yoongi spun Jungkook around swiftly, in time for the banquet halls to open up.

The creak was so loud that other guests stopped what they were doing to see who was entering the party so late.

Jungkook's eyes widened, and he felt his entire body freeze on the spot.

The woman entered gracefully, wearing a beautiful, black off-shoulder floor-length silk dress and a familiar mask with wings. Stunned, his feet moved him forward unknowingly, praying he wasn't hallucinating.

His father bowed beside you and knowingly disappeared. Your lips curled up at the sheer shock painted on your boyfriend's face at your entrance.

Farm Girl patted Jungkook's shoulder triumphantly. "Jeon Jungkook meet my sister... Y/N." Then she leaned over to whisper. "Though you two seem to already be quite acquainted."

"You've got to be shitting me." Jungkook cursed.

"Jeon Jungkook, your language!" His mother scolded from afar.

You grinned as you outstretched your hand, "Y/N."

"Jungkook." He pressed your hand, still not quite believing he was seeing you in front of him. "But how--?"

"Well, you should ask me to dance first, don't you think?" she smirked.

"Ohh ~" Jimin obnoxiously reacted, earning looks from people around him. "What? I'm trying to make it interesting."

"Well then Y/N." Jungkook bowed and offered his hand. "Would you care to dance?"

"I'd be honored." You curtsied and soon found his arm wrapped around your waist, where it belonged. He pulled you close to his body and clasped your hands together. "A little close for our first encounter. Don't you think, Mr. Jeon?"

"I can't believe you." he breathed.

"Well I did tell you I had plans with my family." You cheekily grinned, then glanced over at Yoongi and Farm Girl. "Thanks Sis. Thanks Bro-in-Law."

"I swear Jungkook. If you hurt her, I'll...I'll..." Yoongi fumbled for a threat.

Jungkook waited patiently, quite amused.

"I'll take away your investments! All of them!" he bellowed.

"Alright, you've said your threat, honey." Farm Girl patted Yoongi's chest. "I'm sure Jungkook felt your intimidation."

Farm Girl glanced at Jungkook pleadingly, and Jungkook firmly nodded. "Yes, I take my investments seriously, Mr. Min."

Yoongi peered at the two of you. "I know you two are shitting me. Don't pull that crap."

Jungkook and Farm Girl giggled.

"Let's leave them. Come on." Farm Girl tugged at Yoongi's hand gently. "Your past rugged ways were already a bad influence on the child. Now your cursing has infected him."

"I'm pretty sure that's Jimin's influence." Yoongi mumbled.

Jungkook smiled fondly at you once they disappeared.

"What?" You chuckled.

"Why didn't you ever tell me you were related to them? I didn't think we kept secrets from each other."

"Well," you hummed. "At first, it was kept secret because I didn't want people feeling like they needed to give me special treatment at the office. I'm sure you could relate."

Jungkook nodded.

"Then it just never came up." You shrugged. "To me, they're just my older sister and my clumsy, weak but over-protective, adorable brother-in-law."

"Did you have this planned from the beginning?" Jungkook pulled you closer so his cheek was leaning against your temple, no longer caring that his parents were watching the two of you in awe.

"No." You admitted. "But then I guess the thought of you running off with a rich heiress started bothering me. Then I started wondering...what if your parents would compare me to whoever they chose? Will I ever be truly accepted? So, I decided to just go all in and beat the competition so I wouldn't be compared to anyone."

Jungkook laughed.

"I needed to grow up a little." You smiled. "I didn't want you to fight for us alone."

"I love you." Jungkook whispered as he pressed your foreheads together.

"I love you too."

Jungkook twirled you around and kissed your forehead, "You and your beautiful brain."

"Guess you're still stuck with me, huh?" You grinned cheekily as you tilted your head up.

Jungkook leaned down, moving his lips closer to yours.

"Yah, yah, yah. Too close!" Yoongi bellowed.

"Shut up Yoongi!" Your sister smacked him.

Leo, on the other hand, was watching in anticipation, giving you an encouraging nod supportively.

"Oh maybe we should properly introduce me to your parents first." You shied away.

"Oh, who cares?" Jungkook grinned as he tugged you forward to close the gap and kissed you square in the mouth.

"WOOOOO!" Jimin's obnoxious yelling was heard above the others, causing you two to break the kiss and laugh.

Jungkook glanced over, not surprised to find the flabbergasted expressions of his parents at the sudden turn of events.

"Guess they weren't expecting things to go this well." You grinned.

"No, definitely not." he chuckled.

"So...Red Mask was Jimin, huh? And Black Mask was Hoseok?" You questioned.

Jungkook choked on his own spit at your sudden revelation. "What?"

"Well I was waiting for your dad to come get me when Jimin ran across the lobby yelling 'RED MASK IS BACK BITCHES!' before Receptionist smacked him upside the head and dragged him back inside." You giggled. "Then it all kind of just fell into place."

"Yeah..." Jungkook blushed then he gawked at her, having his own realization. "So wait...you're Tae's cousin..."

"Yes?"

"And Farm Girl's sister."

"Um yes..."

"And I know someone who told me HIS sister was Min Yoongi's fiancee...and if you are her sister then that makes him your BROTHER and --"

"Oh, you know Jin?" You perked up.

Jungkook started coughing violently.

You worriedly patted his back. "Are you okay?"

"Does your erm...your brother know about us? About me? Specifically?" He worried.

"Yeah, why?"

"Uhh...hmmm..." He scratched the back of his head nervously. "Well I guess it's a funny story."

"I know he works in this hotel during weekends." You smiled, looking around briefly. "He's working today actually."

Jungkook laughed half-heartedly as he was horrified at the thought that his fellow mask knew this whole time he was having sex with his sister. He recalled the few months when Jin had challenged him consistently and randomly hit him or gave him the cold shoulder. He had thought it was just the elder's way to play around with him.

He groaned. "It all makes sense now."

"What does?" You blinked.

"I am so sorry, Jin." he exhaled. "Can we treat your brother out one of these days? Something expensive?"

You chuckled. "Jin loves to eat so I'm sure he'll have a few restaurants in mind."

"Most expensive Korean BBQ place in Seoul, and Leo's coming too."

The two of you jumped as Leo appeared out of nowhere and put forth the suggestion.

"Said Jin." he finished.

"Who IS this guy?" Jungkook blinked.

"Oh, he's Yoongi's bodyguard, but he's become the family's dearest friend too." You smiled at the lengthy man warmly.

Leo's lips curled up, pleased.

"Was he listening in?" Jungkook continued to study Leo skeptically.

"I think Jin asked him to." You chuckled.

"What shall I reply with?" Leo questioned.

Jungkook glanced at you and you nodded encouragingly.

"It's a deal." Jungkook responded.

"Master Jin says if you agreed that I should give you a warm embrace and a hit to your head." Leo outstretched his arms and marched robotically towards Jungkook.

"What?" Jungkook stumbled back. "I don't even know you!"

"I must give you a warm embrace." Leo drawled and continued to follow Jungkook as he tried to escape frantically.

"I'd just give in! He takes his job seriously!" You called out happily.

"What a wimp." Jin appeared beside you, snorting.

You grabbed a drink from the tray he was holding. "Says the one who used Leo to do his dirty deed?"

"You know as well as I do that Jungkook is too strong." Jin frowned. "I just evened the playing field."

"So you in Club Masquerade, hm?" You smirked.

Jin looked around, his eyes threatening to pop out of its sockets. "What?! Who? Me? Noooo!"

You glanced at him amused. "My dear brother. You forget that I'm the genius in our family."

Jin averted his eyes, hoping that would make him less guilty.

"Jungkook said he knew you from somewhere, and seeing as I, his girlfriend know usually where he frequents his time, and I, your little sister, know that you aren't a police officer or someone who worked at our company, narrowed it down to you working at Club Masquerade." You snatched another drink and handed it to Jin, who chugged it blankly. "And your reaction confirmed it."

Jin turned red.

"I won't tell if you don't." You whispered.

Jin sighed and held out his pinky. "If I go down, I'm taking you with me."

"Of course." You smirked and locked your pinkies together to seal the pact. "But wow, I'm so proud of you. I thought you were wasting your age and beauty, but here you are getting a lot more action than I thought."

"Ahhh!" Jin covered his ears and walked away, yelling intermittently to drown out any further comments from you, which earned him odd looks from the people he passed.

"Who in the world is that?" Farm Girl turned to look at the origin of the yelling. "Sounds a little like Jin, don't you think?"

Yoongi glanced over and realized that it was in fact, Jin. He hurriedly started dancing wildly to distract his fiancée.

"Woo! This is my jam!" He bellowed, prancing around and wiggling his torso.

"Yoongi... it's a waltz song." She looked at him, amused.

He coughed. "Well, who says we can't party to a waltz?"

"Maybe you should lay off on the drinks." She worried.

Yoongi exhaled as Jin successfully disappeared.

"Parties are so exhausting." he slumped.

"You were just literally wildin' out a few seconds ago." She shook her head.

"Who came up with this mask idea anyway?" Yoongi tapped on his. "It's a bit stuffy, like someone I know."

Coincidentally, Namjoon bumped into Yoongi after his comment, knocking the latter over easily. Luckily, Farm Girl caught him with a chuckle.

"Oh sorry." Namjoon fixed his suit with a smirk.

"You did that on purpose." Yoongi hissed.

"If you weren't so short, I would've gotten out of the way." Namjoon retaliated.

"Whoa there." You interjected. "Play nice, my elders."

Jungkook snorted as you two finally joined the crowd.

"Hi Y/N." Namjoon smiled warmly.

"Hi Joon." You returned his greeting.

"Hi Jungkook!" Jungkook intervened and high-fived himself.

"How did you end up passing the interview, Y/N?" Namjoon leaned around Jungkook to speak to you.

"Ah...that." You grinned.

"The interview? What interview?" Jungkook tilted his head.

"The interview to be your arranged date." You smiled. "I acquired some help from my good friends."

Jungkook then recalled what his mother was saying to him before your entrance. "She got recommendations and high regards from FIVE of the CEO's. They're all heads of the biggest branches too. 3 of them are the Chairman candidates."

"Hoseok, Jimin, Farm Girl, Yoongi..." he counted as he glanced up at Namjoon. "You helped her too?"

Namjoon shrugged. "Why not?"

He squinted skeptically. "Why?"

"I like and respect Y/N. I want her to be happy." Namjoon answered. "And I think you two are good together."

Jungkook peered at him still. "I don't believe you..."

"Jungkook." You chuckled and hit his shoulder.

Namjoon snorted then leaned down to whisper. "But I'm still keeping an eye on you, Nochu."

With that, Namjoon saluted the group and disappeared suavely.

"He's still so cool." You watched dreamily.

Jungkook rolled his eyes.

"Anyways, how did you get my parents to choose you?" He questioned.

"Mmm...I was just my charming self." You grinned and shrugged.

You nervously drummed your fingers on the folder you held with your resume, certificates, and letters of recommendation. You had experienced a few interviews for jobs, but none of that prepared you for an interview in order to be chosen as someone's possible bride-to-be. As nervous as you were because failure here meant they wouldn't accept you as Jungkook's girlfriend in the future, you also knew it could mean easing the burden Jungkook put on himself if you were able to get their approval.

"Ms. Y/N?"

A voice called out, signaling your turn.

"Yes!" You stood up and nervously entered their large office.

The sheer grandeur of the Jeon household was amazing. Being with down-to-earth Jungkook, it never truly struck you that he had come from a rich upbringing. But then again, his company did create a lot of the products you used every day. All you could do was gawk at the large library behind who you assumed to be his parents.

"H-hello." You sat down obediently as you handed them your folder.

"What brings you here today Ms. Y/N? What family are you from?" Jungkook's mother started.

"Um...actually..." you cleared your throat. "My family isn't quite known in the business world. Well, my sister and my brother-in-law are."

"Oh my goodness." Jungkook's mother gasped as she pulled out your recommendation letters. "Do you know all these people well?"

You leaned forward to check that she had the right documents. "Oh yes. I work under CEO Park and CEO Jung. I'm a personal friend of CEO Kim. And my sister and brother-in-law are the two others."

"Chairman Min's grandson is your brother-in-law?" His soft spoken father questioned.

You blushed and nodded. "I know it's not enough to just be bound by titles, but I have similar ambitions of following my sister and my brother-in-law."

They perked up. "You want to become a CEO."

"I hope to be so. I also would like to start my own franchise like the other Chairman candidates as well."

"You came at the top of your class from Seoul University too. Wow." His mother read through your resume. "Well you surely blew everyone out of the water by recommendations alone. It seems you're intelligent and ambitious too."

You bowed gratefully.

"But of course, we're parents first and foremost. On paper, you have wonderful potential and we both think you would be a positive influence and supporter to our son." She glanced at her husband. "But if your family didn't force you here to share in the wealth of our brand name, why would you be interested in our son?"

You smiled, "I actually had the luxury of getting to know Jungkook personally as we were both interns under CEO Park and CEO Jung."

"Oh? And what do you think of our son?"

"He's warm." You glanced at them fondly. "Down-to-Earth. He has a strong sense of justice, and at first, he may seem shy and reserved, nervous even, but when you get to know him, when you truly step back and try to know him, he takes care of people subtly. He's conscious of people's emotions. He's caring. And he always tries his best in something he really wants to do." You chuckled. "He's really funny. He can probably make me laugh even when I'm in the worst of moods. And don't get me started when he gets competitive, he's like a different person."

You realized you were rambling about their son so you averted your eyes, embarrassed.

They were both smiling at you warmly from where they were seated.

You blushed.

"I think we've definitely heard enough." his mother stood up. "Y/N."

"Y-yes...?" You stammered.

She walked over and hugged you, taking you by surprise.

"We'd love to have you date our son." She fixed your hair. "You're beautiful, smart, observant, ambitious, and it seems like you care a lot about him already. We couldn't ask for a better candidate." Then she whispered. "And it'd be great if you could inherit the family name and help raise the company back to independence."

You laughed loudly while Jungkook's father looked puzzled at your secret exchange with his wife. Her eyes twinkled as she studied you warmly.

"Now he might try to run away from you and make excuses, but please stick to him." she pleaded.

"Mrs. Jeon, I'm afraid I'm already quite stuck to him." You grinned.

You smiled as Jungkook held you against while the two of you danced. Resting your head onto his shoulder, you shut your eyes and let yourself relax in his lead.

"Sleepy?" he questioned.

"Why? Will you take me home?" You grinned.

"Don't tempt me." He chuckled.

"I just like being here with you." You hummed.

"Me too." He kissed your temple sweetly. "And Y/N?"

"Hm?" You lifted your head up curiously at his serious tone.

His eyes bore into yours intently, filling you with butterflies all over again. Leaning forward, he captured your lips deeply, leaving you breathless from its passion and intensity.

"I'm glad it was you."

221 notes · View notes

thebibliomancer · 6 years

Text

Essential Avengers: Avengers #167: Tomorrow Dies Today!

January, 1978

Oh hey the Guardians of the Galaxy! Not the ones more known these days and never at the same level of popularity but an interesting bunch just the same!

I’ve been actually thinking of going and reading some of the original team original run.

On this cover, Beast punches a guy in the face and the rest of the Avengers are like hey slow your roll this is a crossover not a hero vs hero event.

Anyway, we start off killing tomorrow today with a priority communications alarm interrupting him from his shower.

You’d think that since its a communications alarm and not necessarily an emergency, he could continue showering and let someone else take the call and if it is an emergency then someone can knock on the door and let him know.

Like, I understand that with the stuff the Avengers deal with its good to stay on your toes but Beast is completely covered in hair. When he starts a shower, its a long, inevitable process that should be seen to until the end.

Otherwise he’s going to drip everywhere and probably smell like dog.

He’s not even the only one who is not ready. Scarlet Witch is half dressed.

And Steve “I probably go on a ten mile run every morning for fun” Rogers criticizes Beast for not getting up to shower at 0600.

Beast, Cap, and Scarlet Witch arrive at the communications center to find Vision already there.

Also, why do they have so many chairs in here? This is more chairs than they have in their living room.

A lot of the Avengers equipment is a mystery to me. They seem like they have a lot of the typical superhero headquarters monitoring equipment but also they so often wait for problems to happen on the news before they notice them.

Anyway, it actually is an emergency so Beast would have had to interrupt his shower anyway.

Nick Fury is on the horn and he tells them to turn on the feed from the Avengers’ monitoring satellite because of course they have one of those and need to watch the news anyway.

Per Fury’s request, they focus the Avengers satellite on the SHIELD space station. Weirdly they can’t see any stars behind the station. Just an endless wall of white.

Beast zooms out and-

AHHHHHHHHHH UNICRON HAS COME AT LAST TO DEVOUR OUR WORLD!

Galactus is going to be miffed.

Except no. This looks like a double Unicron. Which is possibly twice as bad.

Apparently this giant structure popped out of nowhere and its orbit is going to smash the SHIELD station all over it in a couple hours.

So the Avengers assemble to finish getting dressed and also to go check out a mysterious huge space thing.

Like I said, this is the huge space thing portion of their lives.

On the station, playboy industrialist Tony Stark claims he has urgent business on Earth.

Nick Fury is like no shit of course I’m not letting you get smashed with the rest of us you dink, get on a shuttle and go.

Fun fact: the SHIELD space station is where Steven Lang’s Project: Armageddon set up shop. And coming up to space to stop him is what led to Jean Grey becoming the Phoenix.

Secretly, Tony Stark has to get back to Earth so he can change into Iron Man and lead the Avengers back up here.

Double lives are hard.

Meanwhile, Thor and Wonder Man are enjoying some bonding time in a diner.

Thor confesses that some mysterious force has been transporting him back to Earth every time the Avengers need his help. Which has to be every couple of days. Its almost as if he’s being displaced through time.

Wonder Man goes wow cool uh I’ll be no help figuring that out but as long as we’re here maybe you can give me some advice.

Wonder Man: “You see... sometimes I -- I feel as though I’m not man enough to be a super man!”

-interrupting Avengers beeper says no time for feels, time for punches-

So Wonder Man and Thor fly back to Avengers’ Mansion.

But they have to wait because Iron Man still hasn’t joined them.

And when he does show up, Cap goes off on him.

Iron Man: “Sorry I’m late, group!”

Captain America: “You’re sorry you’re late? A hundred men might die up there, and --”

Iron Man: “Then shut up and get into the ship!”

Also, new Quinjet! Space Quinjet!

Only minutes later, the Avengers have arrived on the SHIELD station. Which is... really impressive.

But since it took them so long (because of Iron Man), there’s no time left for anything fancy. The big double Unicron is only half a mile away.

Now the only option is to spacesuit up (except for Thor and Vision), rocket across to an opening that the station’s brand new Stark computer pinpointed, and find a way to redirect or destroy the giant space thing in... fifteen minutes.

Geez.

I’m pretty sure fifteen minutes wouldn’t even get you from one side to the other of that thing.

But the Avengers do rocket across. And the opening that the computer found was an airlock. And interestingly, they find that the atmosphere inside the station is breathable and even chemically perfect for humans!

Now that is interesting. Does that mean that this is a human construction?

Not necessarily. The Avengers never had trouble breathing on Skrull ships or Thanos’ giant H, or even on the Kree homeworld.

I mean maybe the chemically perfect line signifies that even beyond everyone in space breathing the same thing except that one group of aliens that kidnapped that lung expert, that this construct has a human friendly atmosphere.

Iron Man weighs in. Atmosphere or not, whether the occupants are humanoid or not, this construct is far beyond the capabilities of any Earthly power.

Boring and also a waste of time says Cap.

And he steps up and takes charge, giving everyone a directive.

They should split up to cover more ground.

And while that would usually be a bad idea on a space station that appeared out of nowhere and could contain any number of alien nasties, the simple fact is that they have a vanishingly small amount of time.

Splitting up is the only way to cover any significant amount of territory.

So Vision and Wanda are one team. Wonder Man and Cap another. Thor and Iron Man another. And Beast is on his own because they have an odd number of people.

Although Beast wonders why he’s the one without a partner. He used mouthwash that morning!

Meanwhile, while Iron Man dismisses Thor’s concern that Iron Man might be troubled over Cap taking charge, in reality he is troubled.

Iron Man: “On the other hand it’s no secret what Cap thinks of my leadership! I suspect his resentment is growing and getting personal! With the stakes the team is playing for, that kind of dissension can lead to sudden death!”

Maybe its time to consider whether someone without their own book should lead the team then.

Meanwhile elsewhere, Beast is climbing through the air ducts or perhaps Jefferies tubes. And actually Cap had a point splitting him off like this. Beast is the only one who has the agility to crawl through tubes like this.

Good call, Cap!

But when he pokes his head out of the Jefferies air duct, someone grabs him and yanks him out like a radish.

Hey, its Charlie-27! From a race engineered to live on Jupiter, he’s about 11 times stronger and denser than a normal human being.

Also, its Nikki Gold! Raised on Mercury, she has high resistance to heat and most radiation and also HER HAIR IS FIRE.

And the thing is, they don’t think Beast is an enemy. They think he’s some kind of ugly alien space monkey that can also parrot words like a raven.

Beast refuses to put up with that sitting down dangling by his scruff so he kicks Charlie-27 in the face and starts bouncing all over the room.

Nikki tries to shoot Beast because, hey, he’s a rude monkey. But he’s bouncing so fast she can’t get a bead on him despite having aim adjacent to Annie Oakley’s.

But then Beast tries to tackle Charlie-27 and just bounces off. Because dang. Remember? Eleven times more massive than a normal person? Its rather like Beast just tried to jump kick a brick wall.

Before possibly breaking a toe kicking a guy built like a brick house, Beast also muses on the weirdery of the two of them speaking English.

Which again isn’t so odd. Universal translators exist. And a lot of aliens speak English.

But all these things like the atmosphere and aliens speaking English? This time they signify something other than narrative convenience.

Nikki jumps to confront the dazed Beast but with a RRRAK! a coherent light burst separates the two.

The rest of the Guardians have shown up, specifically Starhawk who tells Charlie-27 and Nikki to stand down.

Starhawk: “This fighting must cease! I sense that he is not evil! Accept the word of one who knows!”

Lets run up the line.

Blue guy red fin is Yondu Udonta and he is absolutely familiar if you only know Guardians from the movies. Like in the movies, he has special arrows that he can control through whistling. But in the comics he also uses a bow. He is from Alpha Centauri which kind of breaks the theme of the Guardians all being humans but adapted for life on different planets of the solar system.

Unlike the movies, Yondu is portrayed as noble savage IN SPACE. Going with that he has an intuitive and mystical rapport with nature. IN SPACE! Making him a space Alabaman was probably a better idea.

Next there is Starhawk. In the movie he was Sylvester Stallone and very disappointed in Yondu. In the comics, he’s just weird. He was conceived on Earth, was born on Vesper, and was raised on Arcturus IV. He has a grab bag of powers like flight, super strength, light manipulation and being the one who knows thanks to being empowered by the Hawk God. He’s also in an on-again off-again fusion with an Aleta Ogord. He’s basically weird.

Next is Martinex. His people were genetically-engineered to colonize Pluto so he’s made of silicon crystal instead of meat. He can also siphon heat out of the environment or vent it. Which lets him shoot heat rays or cold beams somehow.

And finally we have Vance Astro, Major Victory. He’s another weird one. He was sent on a mission to help colonize Centauri IV, put in cryogenic hibernation, and woke up to find that he wasted his damn time because faster travel had been invented and people got there before him. And now he has to stay in his astronaut suit or age rapidly. Also also, he has psychokinesis. And also his younger self became New Warrior Marvel Boy and probably ruined his chances of becoming an astronaut by killing his abusive dad.

Comics are weird.

Beast doesn’t know this though. He just sees a bunch of asshole aliens who are still calling him monkey so he jumps to attack Charlie-27′s face.

But is interrupted when Mjolnir flies by, snags him in its loop and drags him away. Which is damn good trajectory control.

Anyway, despite split up gang we’ll cover more ground, the Avengers have reassembled off-screen and apparently recognize the Guardians from prior team-ups. With Cap in Marvel Two-in-One #5 and with Thor in Thor Annual #6.

And now Major Victory recognizes the Avengers. Because he is from this time period and oh man oh geez the Avengers are his heroes! He used to dream of meeting them!

So a potential misunderstanding fight cut off before it began and the teams introduce themselves.

And no worry about the SHIELD station. The Guardian’s meteor deflectors will gently shove it out of the way instead of running into it. This whole mission was pointless!

Except as set-up. And honestly, even if the Guardian’s station wasn’t going to run into the SHIELD station, I’d hope that they’d be interested in why a giant space thing appeared.

Thor recaps his crossover with the Guardians because it happened so recently he hadn’t had a chance to put it in the Avengers files yet and also because the details are relevant.

He teamed up with the Guardians to invade Korvac’s Wonderworld. Who is Korvac?

He was a collaborator with the Badoon when they conquered the Sol System IN THE FUTURE. But they caught him napping at work one day so they grafted his upper body to his work station because the Badoon are dicks.

So obviously he turned on them and started a plan to conquer the cosmos by trying to make Earth’s Sun go nova.

Aw dangit, Thanos, you trendsetter!

The Guardians plus Thor were able to thwart Korvac’s plan and minions but Korvac escaped by traveling back in time to the year this year.

They’re not sure what he’s planning but when a guy who tried to blow up the Sun goes back in time you just have to kind of assume its nothing good. For instance, Major Victory’s past self is currently a child on Earth. If Korvac kills young Vance Astro, then Major Victory never gets frozen like a space Captain America and never goes on to form the Guardians.

So they have to stop him. Except if its on Earth, Major Victory can’t get involved. Two Vance Astros on Earth would mess up the time stream.

(Beast you were right there for this conversation, why did you think bringing the original X-Men into the present from the past was a good idea??)

Meanwhile, on Earth, Janet Van Dyne makes her debut as a fashion designer.

I had been wondering where she and Hank (Pym) were. Sort of weird that they didn’t get paged about this though. There’s a giant thing in space and they buzz Thor and Wonder Man away from dinner but Jan doesn’t get called away from her fashion show.

Maybe she left her bleeper at home.

Anyway, also in the crowd is Kyle Richmond, aka Nighthawk, aka Not-Batman. He’s usually on the Defenders, being a jerk, but Yellowjacket is sometimes doing stuff with the Defenders so maybe that’s why he’s here.

He does comment to himself that it’s weird for him to sit through a fashion show.

Kyle Richmond also notices a weirdo sitting next to him in the crowd. Wearing a tux in this day and age and sitting like a statue. He doesn’t react to anything until a model named Carina Walters takes a turn down the catwalk in a sultry summer jumpsuit.

Kyle being the kind of person he is, sees that this weirdo stranger reacts to Carina and thinks “Forget it, pal! You’re not her type!”

You’re a gem, Kyle.

And then Porcupine busts in to rob the place.

Just his luck that he chose to rob a place where three superheroes were chilling. Porcupines are seriously unlucky.

Hank Pym and Janet waste no time shrinking down to shoot the robbers with tiny blasts.

Janet was also far-thinking enough to have her dress made from unstable molecule cloth so she wouldn’t have to fly around naked just in case a supervillain tried to rob her fashion show.

Its this kind of forethought that made her one of the better chairpeople that the Avengers ever had.

Just saying. Civil Wars don’t happen when Jan runs the show.

And while the rest of the audience panics and flees and screams, the mysterious tux weirdo continues to calmly sit in his seat.

Kyle Richmond managed to sneak off and change into his costume and I don’t even know where he managed to hide the wings because they would not fit under his civilian clothes.

But anyways, he helps punch people that dare ruin Jan’s big debut.

Including a guy that hesitates from shooting at Nighthawk because he doesn’t want to go up on a murder rap. Nighthawk makes the very valid argument that not making a decision is a way of making a decision and unnamed robber made the right decision.

What a weird segment. I hope no-shoot criminal turns his life around.

Anyway, the tuxedo weirdo shows up where Carina is tending to a fainted Mrs. Lichterdale. And he silently offers her a hand.

And without a word spoken she feels his desire but also his offer and without a word spoken she departs with him.

And they seem to teleport or something from the scene while the heroes are distracted shooting Porcupine with pink and yellow zaps until he finally falls down.

Only after the villains are all unconscious does Mrs. Licherterdale inform Jan that Carina is missing along with Jan’s sultry summer jumpsuit.

Hank is sure that she just got frightened and ran off somewhere. She’ll turn up!

Jan: “I hope! That was my favorite outfit!”

Oh Jan!

So here we go again. Once again we take our first step into a run defining story arc. It was only back in May that I started the Celestial Madonna Saga and now here we are once again on the front porch of a long saga I have mixed feelings about.

The Korvac Saga.

The Shooteriest part of Shooter’s run on Avengers.

At the least, we’re going to get some more time with the Guardians. The downside to not having a misunderstanding fight is that if you’re solely following Avengers, we haven’t really seen what they can do yet.

And they have some good batshit stuff that they get up to. Like the giant double Unicron station? Its called Drydock. It was a, well, drydock and training facility. When the Badoon invaded, the commander used its experimental warp drive to keep the station out of Badoon hands. But warp radiation killed the entire crew.

In an almost Red Dwarfian move, the computer needed people to give it orders. So it created a simulated crew to tell it what to do. Except the simulated commander went insane and captured the Guardians of the Galaxy to create a clone army of friends. So Charlie-27 had to run the gauntlet of the station’s security and shut down the computer.

That stuff right there? That’s amazing. And I don’t mind at all if the Guardians are hanging around bringing that kind of craziness to the Avengers.

Oh and also, I guess there’s the mystery of what Korvac is up to and whether the tuxedo weirdo is related. I already know the answer but what are you going to do? Google information?

Pssah.

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puclpodcast · 7 years

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The Fluff: Autumn Is Coming (a.k.a. My Top 6 Gen II Pokémon

Hello, my dear PUCLonians, and welcome once again to The Fluff. In September we’ll finally be able to use the Time Capsule again in a meaningful manner, by which I mean, without having our Pokémon stuck forever in old games. Gold and Silver are coming out on Virtual Console, and while I deeply feel the lack of an immediate Crystal release, I remain optimistic for a future one.

Gen II is kind of my unfinished Generation: due to various circumstances, I never finished my Silver game way back when, and in my SoulSilver, I could not bring myself to grind my sub-par team up to a level that would allow me to challenge Red. So in my mind he’s still sitting there, waiting for me to come find him. Will I ever? I hope so, and when I do, there’s a good chance I’ll bring some of these to the match: my Top 6 Gen II Pokémon!

Number 6: Chikorita and Hoppip

These Pokémon round out my rankings together, although for different reasons. The first time I played Silver, remembering how much of a good idea it had been to pick a Fire-type starter in Gen I, I chose Cyndaquil to begin my journey. But as my love for Grass types consolidated, Chikorita became my only choice. (Hint: it wasn’t a very good one, to be honest, as it’s by far the most difficult Starter for the Johto games).

When I got Pokémon Super Mistery Dungeon, the personality test said I was a Chikorita, and I was like, yeah, OK, that sounds plausible enough. And then every single person I know, from my PUCL friends to my Mom to my boyfriend, looking at a list of the possible starters for that game, pointed, umprompted, to the Chikorita as the best possible match for me. (My boyfriend called it “that zucchini thing”, but that’s besides the point.) So, apparently, I’m not a Whimsicott, but a Chikorita.

Well, I wasn’t a possible starter, which is absolutely preposterous, so I wouldn’t worry too much about that.

I don’t know, Whimsicott… it definitely left a mark. Hence Chikorita’s presence here.

So it’s a vanity thing?

… I suppose.

As for Hoppip, I’ve told this story countless times: Hoppip was the one Pokémon I remember coming across in a patch of tall grass, knowing absolutely nothing about it and never having seen it before, and it filled my heart with wonder and joy. (My heart was a bit disappointed when I caught it and realized it knew no useful moves, but that’s another story.)

With all the other generations after being pretty much completely spoiled by Japan having them in advance or by Game Freak being dumb, I’ve never again felt that wondrous feeling. And I miss it. Hopefully the spoilers for Gen 8 are handled in a better fashion… or I can devise a strategy to stay in PUCL without seeing absolutely all of them.

Number 5: Furret

Furret is one of those Pokémon that hovers around the top of my huge, ever-changing list of favorite Pokémon. But it is not a Pokémon that represents Gen II to me, so it’s a bit low on this list.

Furret is as useless as it is freaking adorable, and somehow learning it is as long as a man is tall does not take away from it.

… wait, what- Oh dear Arceus. This thing is 5’11”?

Yup. You’re used to my Furret plushie being tinier than you, but the real deal is huuuge. I’ve seen people make life-sized Furret plushes online, but so far none have been sufficiently fluffy in my opinion. If an appropriate one was made, you can bet I’d empty my wallet out for it in a heartbeat.

It would essentially be a body pillow.

Yes! The cutest one ever! Furret is definitely a Pokémon I’d choose to have in real life, for its perfect cuddling potential. And its pink shiny is delightful, although the color has lost a lot in the later Generations.

Number 4: Mareep

I guess it’s pretty clear that I love fluffy, sheep-shaped Pokémon.

And rightly so.

So Mareep was on the fast track to being on my team as soon as I met one in Pokémon Silver. While the loss of fluff upon evolving was a bit disheartening, I loved my Flaaffy and my Ampharos dearly, and years and years later, my love was rewarded with a super-fluffy Mega Evolution!

Thoreal the Ampharos sits in a box, waiting for me to find a way to use him properly in OU (I have a good set, just not a good team to go with it), which hopefully will be soon. I hope he and Tapu Cocoa, my Koko, can become fast friends.

I can take care of Ground types for them!

That’s sweet, Whimsicott, thank you. I’ll consider it. Anyway, after a first Generation in which the only Electric type I liked was Raichu, the Mareep line came in and strengthened my appreciation for this type, which, given my fondness for Grass types and their hatred of anything with wings and a beak, is a good, good thing.

Number 3: Celebi

Between my Mew and Jirachi 20th Anniversary plushes sits a Celebi from the same line. It has adorable glittery pink wings, and it has so far refused to let me go back in time to tell myself to buy Google stocks.

Gee, I wonder why.

Much like Mew in Gen I, Celebi was the unattainable dream of Gen II for me, because, much like with Mew in Gen I, Italy was pretty much the only country where Pokémon games were localized and sold in giant heaps, but no distribution events were held. My first Celebi came in Gen IV, in 2011, but the memory of its mystique never really left, and Celebi is pretty much the only onion I love (since I can’t eat most of them).

It’s kind of a bummer that it already had two non-Normal types and it couldn’t become a Fairy type along with me. I’d have been kind of OK with Celebi as my twin.

Really? I always thought you loved the exclusivity.

I do, but for a Mythical Pokémon, I might have made an exception. Now, sure, Tapu Bulu is a strong Legendary, but it has ZERO fashion sense. Unacceptable.

Yeah, Bulu is a good, bro, but… well. Let’s go back to Celebi, shall we? Despite its slightly awkward looong arms, it’s really cute and huggable. Also, we need a billion more time-travel plots, stat. They’re my favorite and I can’t get enough.

Number 2: Suicune

Speaking of time travel plots in Pokémon, Celebi’s mate in that movie I will, absolutely, watch some day (when the warnings about its awfulness from my PUCL peeps have faded enough from my ears) is the majestic Suicune.

Maestrale, my Suicune, was only used in a few VGC matches in a PFTT two years ago. Now I’m gathering Bottle Caps to give it a chance to shine in Gen 7.

Wait, Maestrale isn’t shiny.

No, darling, I was being metaphorical. Suicune is utterly beautiful, with its physics-defying ribbon tails, its flowing mane, its lovely blue shade… ah, it’s so pretty!

I mean, it was on a team with a shiny Whimsicott, so my eyes were elsewhere, but I guess it does look pretty nice, yes.

My love for Suicune is the main reason I resent Crystal not coming out this Autumn. This Pokémon deserves the extra storyline it got in Crystal and in the remakes, and I can’t wait to chase after it again, following the Northern wind.

Number 1: Bellossom

As I’ve mentioned before, I fell in love with Bellossom during its dance in the short that came with Pokémon The Movie 2000. I’ve always loved the Oddish line, and Bellossom was a fantastic addition to it. It is constantly on my list of “Pokémon I wish were more viable in battle”, and as much as Thatch tried during that one episode, I haven’t been able to find a set that satisfies me yet.

Maybe your expectations are too high.

Maybe they are. But when I do find that set, you can bet I’ll be breeding enough Oddish to plant a freaking forest of them, because Bellossom currently has the best shiny in the game. I do have a shiny Oddish already, but her Nature is not ideal, so my little green friend needs a little brother or sister. By the way, there is, out there in the world, one absolutely perfect shiny Bellossom plush. It was made on commission, so it’s not commercially available, but I want to share this awesomeness with you all:

By Sugarstitch on DeviantArt

Isn’t that amazing?

Not as good as a Whimsicott plush, but yes, cute!

With that, I suppose I’m done with Gen II until September. My dear PUCLonians, what are your favorite Gen II Pokémon? What are your fondest memories from that time? Let me know in the comments, and also let me know, if you managed to convince your Celebi to let you travel in time, how the heck you did it. Mine is apparently a real stickler for the rules.

It’s also made of fabric, which I’m sure doesn’t help, but keep dreaming, sister.

Until next time,

The Fluffiest Whimsicott

from The Fluff: Autumn Is Coming (a.k.a. My Top 6 Gen II Pokémon

#pokemon #pucl #pokemon podcast #ORAS #nintendo #video games

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theconservativebrief · 6 years

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These mass shootings don’t keep happening because we don’t know what to do.

With another mass shooting in the US — this time, at a synagogue in Pittsburgh — many Americans are once again horrified and bewildered by what feels like constantly occurring tragedies. Calls for action are already popping up on social media. But if this plays out like it has before, there’s a very high chance that little to nothing will happen on a national scale.

Since I began covering mass shootings at Vox, I have seen this pattern play out again and again: A shooting happens. There are demands for action. Maybe something gets introduced in Congress. The debate goes back and forth for a bit. Then people move on — usually after a week or two. And so, with little to nothing changed, there’s eventually another mass shooting.

As a reporter, I have become eerily attuned to this horrible American ritual. I do the same thing every single time we get news of a mass shooting: verify reports, contribute to a “what we know” article, and then begin to update our old pieces on guns. I do this almost instinctively at this point — and that terrifies me. No one should get used to this.

As I see it, the core issue is that America as a whole refuses to even admit it has a serious problem with guns and gun violence. And more than that, lawmakers continue acting like the solutions are some sort of mystery, as if there aren’t years of research and experiences in other countries that show restrictions on firearms can save lives.

Consider President Donald Trump’s initial speech in response to the Parkland, Florida, school shooting: His only mention of guns was a vague reference to “gunfire” as he described what happened. He never even brought up gun control or anything related to that debate, instead vaguely promising to work “with state and local leaders to help secure our schools and tackle the difficult issue of mental health.”

This is America’s elected leader — and he essentially, based on his first public response, ignored what the real problem is. And although the White House eventually came around to bipartisan proposals to very slightly improve background checks and ban bump stocks, the compromises amount to fairly small changes to America’s weak gun laws.

In my coverage of these shootings, I’ve always focused on solutions through studies and policy ideas that would tamp down on the number of shootings. The good news is there are real solutions out there.

But America can’t get to those solutions until it admits it has a gun problem and confronts the reality of what it would mean to seriously address it.

The US is unique in two key — and related — ways when it comes to guns: It has way more gun deaths than other developed nations, and it has far higher levels of gun ownership than any other country in the world.

The US has nearly six times the gun homicide rate of Canada, more than seven times that of Sweden, and nearly 16 times that of Germany, according to United Nations data compiled by the Guardian. (These gun deaths are a big reason America has a much higher overall homicide rate, which includes non-gun deaths, than other developed nations.)

Javier Zarracina/Vox

Mass shootings actually make up a small fraction of America’s gun deaths, constituting less than 2 percent of such deaths in 2016. But America does see a lot of these horrific events: According to CNN, “The US makes up less than 5% of the world’s population, but holds 31% of global mass shooters.”

The US also has by far the highest number of privately owned guns in the world. Estimated in 2007, the number of civilian-owned firearms in the US was 88.8 guns per 100 people, meaning there was almost one privately owned gun per American and more than one per American adult. The world’s second-ranked country was Yemen, a quasi-failed state torn by civil war, where there were 54.8 guns per 100 people.

Max Fisher/Washington Post

Another way of looking at that: Americans make up less than 5 percent of the world’s population yet own roughly 42 percent of all the world’s privately held firearms.

These two facts — on gun deaths and firearm ownership — are related. The research, compiled by the Harvard School of Public Health’s Injury Control Research Center, is pretty clear: After controlling for variables such as socioeconomic factors and other crime, places with more guns have more gun deaths. Researchers have found this to be true not just with homicides, but also with suicides (which in recent years were around 60 percent of US gun deaths), domestic violence, and even violence against police.

For example, a 2013 study, led by a Boston University School of Public Health researcher, found that, after controlling for multiple variables, each percentage point increase in gun ownership correlated with a roughly 0.9 percent rise in the firearm homicide rate.

This chart, based on data compiled by researcher Josh Tewksbury, shows the correlation between the number of guns and gun deaths (including homicides and suicides) among wealthier nations:

Guns are not the only contributor to violence. (Other factors include, for example, poverty, urbanization, and alcohol consumption.) But when researchers control for other confounding variables, they have found time and time again that America’s high levels of gun ownership are a major reason the US is so much worse in terms of gun violence than its developed peers.

Supporters of gun rights look at America’s high levels of gun violence and argue that guns are not the problem. They point to other issues, from violence in video games and movies to the supposed breakdown of the traditional family.

Most recently, they’ve blamed mental health issues for mass shootings. This is the only policy issue that Trump mentioned in his first speech following the Florida shooting.

But as far as homicides go, people with mental illnesses are more likely to be victims, not perpetrators, of violence. And Michael Stone, a psychiatrist at Columbia University who maintains a database of mass shooters, wrote in a 2015 analysis that only 52 out of the 235 killers in the database, or about 22 percent, had mental illnesses. “The mentally ill should not bear the burden of being regarded as the ‘chief’ perpetrators of mass murder,” he concluded. Other research has backed this up.

More broadly, America does not have a monopoly on mental illness. That’s not to say more access to mental health care wouldn’t help; it could, for example, be effective for reducing the number of gun suicides. But mental health issues aren’t what make the US stand out in terms of gun violence.

The problem that’s unique to the US, instead, is guns — and America’s abundance of them.

As a breakthrough analysis by UC Berkeley’s Franklin Zimring and Gordon Hawkins in the 1990s found, it’s not even that the US has more crime than other developed countries. This chart, based on data from Jeffrey Swanson at Duke University, shows that the US is not an outlier when it comes to overall crime:

Instead, the US appears to have more lethal violence — and that’s driven in large part by the prevalence of guns.

”A series of specific comparisons of the death rates from property crime and assault in New York City and London show how enormous differences in death risk can be explained even while general patterns are similar,” Zimring and Hawkins wrote. “A preference for crimes of personal force and the willingness and ability to use guns in robbery make similar levels of property crime 54 times as deadly in New York City as in London.”

This is in many ways intuitive: People of every country get into arguments and fights with friends, family, and peers. But in the US, it’s much more likely that someone will get angry at an argument and be able to pull out a gun and kill someone.

The research also suggests that gun control can work. A 2016 review of 130 studies in 10 countries, published in Epidemiologic Reviews, found that new legal restrictions on owning and purchasing guns tended to be followed by a drop in gun violence — a strong indicator that restricting access to firearms can save lives.

Consider Australia’s example.

In 1996, a 28-year-old man walked into a cafe in Port Arthur, Australia, ate lunch, pulled a semiautomatic rifle out of his bag, and opened fire on the crowd, killing 35 people and wounding 23 more. It was the worst mass shooting in Australia’s history.

Australian lawmakers responded with legislation that, among other provisions, banned certain types of firearms, such as automatic and semiautomatic rifles and shotguns. The Australian government confiscated 650,000 of these guns through a mandatory buyback program, in which it purchased firearms from gun owners. It established a registry of all guns owned in the country and required a permit for all new firearm purchases. (This is much further than bills typically proposed in the US, which almost never make a serious attempt to immediately reduce the number of guns in the country.)

Australia’s firearm homicide rate dropped by about 42 percent in the seven years after the law passed, and its firearm suicide rate fell by 57 percent, according to a review of the evidence by Harvard researchers.

It’s difficult to know for sure how much of the drop in homicides and suicides was caused specifically by the gun buyback program and other legal changes. Australia’s gun deaths, for one, were already declining before the law passed. But researchers David Hemenway and Mary Vriniotis argue that the gun buyback program very likely played a role: “First, the drop in firearm deaths was largest among the type of firearms most affected by the buyback. Second, firearm deaths in states with higher buyback rates per capita fell proportionately more than in states with lower buyback rates.”

One study of the program, by Australian researchers, found that buying back 3,500 guns per 100,000 people correlated with up to a 50 percent drop in firearm homicides and a 74 percent drop in gun suicides. As Dylan Matthews explained for Vox, the drop in homicides wasn’t statistically significant because Australia already had a pretty low number of murders. But the drop in suicides most definitely was — and the results are striking.

Javier Zarracina/Vox

One other fact, noted by Hemenway and Vriniotis in 2011: “While 13 gun massacres (the killing of 4 or more people at one time) occurred in Australia in the 18 years before the [Australia gun control law], resulting in more than one hundred deaths, in the 14 following years (and up to the present), there were no gun massacres.”

A common counterpoint to the evidence on gun control: If it works so well, why does Chicago have so much gun violence despite having some of the strictest gun policies in the US?

White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders made this argument after the 2017 Las Vegas mass shooting: “I think if you look to Chicago, where you had over 4,000 victims of gun-related crimes last year, they have the strictest gun laws in the country. That certainly hasn’t helped there.”

It’s true that Chicago has fairly strict gun laws (although not the strictest). And it’s true that the city has fairly high levels of gun violence (although also not the worst in the US).

This doesn’t, however, expose the failure of gun control altogether, but rather the limits of leaving gun policies to a patchwork of local and state laws. The basic problem: If a city or state passes strict gun control measures, people can simply cross a border to buy guns in a jurisdiction with laxer laws.

Chicago, for example, requires a Firearm Owners Identification card, a background check, a three-day waiting period, and documentation for all firearm sales. But Indiana, across the border, doesn’t require any of this for purchases between two private individuals (including those at gun shows and those who meet through the internet), allowing even someone with a criminal record to buy a firearm without passing a background check or submitting paperwork recording the sale.

So someone from Chicago can drive across the border — to Indiana or to other places with lax gun laws — and buy a gun without any of the big legal hurdles he would face at home. Then that person can resell or give guns to others in Chicago, or keep them, leaving no paper trail behind. (This is illegal trafficking under federal law, but Indiana’s lax laws and enforcement — particularly the lack of a paper trail — make it virtually impossible to catch someone until a gun is used in a crime.)

The result: According to a 2014 report from the Chicago Police Department, nearly 60 percent of the guns in crime scenes that were recovered and traced between 2009 and 2013 came from outside the state. About 19 percent came from Indiana — making it the most common state of origin for guns besides Illinois.

This isn’t exclusive to Chicago. A 2016 report from the New York State Office of the Attorney General found that 74 percent of guns used in crimes in New York between 2010 and 2015 came from states with lax gun laws. (The gun trafficking chain from Southern states with weak gun laws to New York is so well-known it even has a name: “the Iron Pipeline.”) And another 2016 report from the US Government Accountability Office found that most of the guns — as many as 70 percent — used in crimes in Mexico, which has strict gun laws, can be traced back to the US, which has generally weaker gun laws.

That doesn’t mean the stricter gun laws in Chicago, New York, or any other jurisdiction have no effect, but it does limit how far these local and state measures can go, since the root of the problem lies in other places’ laws. The only way the pipeline could be stopped would be if all states individually strengthened their gun laws at once — or, more realistically, if the federal government passed a law that enforces stricter rules across the US.

America’s attention to gun control often focuses on a few specific measures: universal background checks, restrictions on people with mental illnesses buying firearms, and an assault weapons ban, for example. It is rare that American politicians, even on the left, go much further than that. Something like Australia’s law — which amounts to a confiscation program — is never seriously considered.

As Matthews previously explained, this is a big issue. The US’s gun problem is so dire that it arguably needs solutions that go way further than what we typically see in mainstream proposals — at least, if the US ever hopes to get down to European levels of gun violence.

If the fundamental problem is that America has far too many guns, then policies need to cut the number of guns in circulation right now to seriously reduce the number of gun deaths. Background checks and other restrictions on who can buy a gun can’t achieve that in the short term. What America likely needs, then, is something more like Australia’s mandatory buyback program — essentially, a gun confiscation scheme — paired with a serious ban on specific firearms (including, potentially, all semiautomatic weapons).

But no one in Congress is seriously proposing something that sweeping. The Manchin-Toomey bill, the only gun legislation in Congress after Sandy Hook that came close to becoming law, didn’t even establish universal background checks. Recent proposals have been even milder, taking small steps like banning bump stocks or slightly improving the existing system for background checks.

Part of the holdup is the Second Amendment. While there is reasonable scholarly debate about whether the Second Amendment actually protects all Americans’ individual right to bear arms and prohibits stricter forms of gun control, the reality is the Supreme Court and US lawmakers — backed by the powerful gun lobby, particularly the NRA — widely agree that the Second Amendment does put barriers on how far restrictions can go. That would likely rule out anything like the Australian policy response short of a court reinterpretation or a repeal of the Second Amendment, neither of which seems likely.

So the US, for political, cultural, and legal reasons, seems to be unable to take the action that it really needs.

None of that is to say that milder measures are useless. Connecticut’s law requiring handgun purchasers to first pass a background check and obtain a license, for example, was followed by a 40 percent drop in gun homicides and a 15 percent reduction in handgun suicides. Similar results — in the reverse — were reported in Missouri when it repealed its own permit-to-purchase law. It’s difficult to separate these changes from long-term trends (especially since gun homicides have generally been on the decline for decades now), but a review of the evidence by RAND linked milder gun control measures, including background checks, to reduced injuries and deaths — and that means these measures likely saved lives.

There are also some evidence-based policies that could help outside the realm of gun control, including more stringent regulations and taxes on alcohol, changes in policing, and behavioral intervention programs.

But if America wants to get to the levels of gun deaths that its European peers report, it will likely need to go much, much further on guns in particular.

Original Source -> I’ve covered gun violence for years. The solutions aren’t a big mystery.

via The Conservative Brief

#IFTTT #The Conservative Brief

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secretariatbourgeoisophobe · 7 years

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i got myself tagged by @ilyatath and @fmlforeverwrites and its taken me so long to do this bc im trash but hye ho here i am!!!

rules: answer these 85 statements and tag 20 people. yeah im not even gonna get close to 20 people and i have a feeling that some of you have already done this but oh well @asharadaynes @tooextremeforlouisiana @aaron-burrsir @kreacherwrites @kryptxns @opalcscent @beccabec876 @mynameismelodypond and if any of y’all who ain’t tagged wanna do this then be my guest

the last

1. drink: strawberry and kiwi squash which honestly tastes a surprising amount like nondescript punch

2. phone call: i don’t make phone calls but i guess when my auntie called last week to check one of the boxes she was storing here??????

3. text message: last general message was to an rp partner this morning lmao bc i wanted to hurt her w ship inspo

4. song you listened to: lost boy by ruth b i think????

5. time you cried: months ago idk like it could legit be 2 or 18 months ago i have no idea

6. dated someone twice: u presume me to have dated someone once

7. kissed someone and regretted it: regret can be avoided if u never do the thing in the first place

8. been cheated on: u can’t get cheated on if u never dated in the first place

9. lost someone special: as long as ghosting on friends doesn’t count then this is a hard no

10. been depressed: yeaaaahhhhh the apathy’s still w me even outside of the severe episodes

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: surprisingly enough ive never actually reached this point before even beer olympics wasnt as dicey as id expected

3 favourite colours

12. dark reds (like burgundy, maroon or crimson)

13. black like my soul

14. idek black and red or my go to faves maybe dark purples/blues??????

in the last year have you

15. made new friends: yeah yeah yeah going to america kinda meant i had to lmao

16. fallen out of love: im gonna say no but this is a massive probably

17. laughed until you cried: i dont think so????? but idk maybe

18. found out someone was talking about you: nah i dont think so im too boring to be talked about

19. met someone who changed you: im gonna say yeah, im probs gonna say this a lot but going to america was hella good and it was p hard not to be changed by all the stuff over there

20. found out who your friends are: sorta yes sorta no idk let me be a cryptid in peace

21. kissed someone on your Facebook list: i. have. never. been. kissed.

general

22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: most of them i think idk i should probs clear some of those dicks out

23. do you have any pets: unfortunately no but i want a fucking cat when im older

24. do you want to change your name: not really nah. it’s basic but its mine and i kinda like it but if u use the wrong form of my name for our friendship level then i will feel uncomfy

25. what did you do for your last birthday: packed up all my shit then chilled w my friends and played mario kart

26. what time did you wake up: around 9 i think???? i dont do well w remembering shit

27. what were you doing at midnight last night: im p sure i was sorting out my inventory in da:i, idk i was deffo doing inquisition shit then

28. name something you can’t wait for: the last jedi to come out. gimme fucking force sensitive finn!!! make jedistormpilot canon u cowards!!!!!

29. when was the last time you saw your mom: an hour or so ago. she’s around and hovering and i just want her to go

31. what are you listening to right now: the goldbergs is on in the background rn but im not actively paying attention

32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: i mean it felt like there were three dozen different toms back at school so yeah

33. something that is getting on your nerves: my parent’s constantly hanging around, the dread thought that my sister is coming home in around an week and i will get no peace

34. most visited website: this blue hellsite

35. hair colour: brown

36. long or short hair: it’s kinda long but it really doesn’t look like it lmao

37. do you have a crush on someone: not really?????? idk emotions are weird fucking things

38. what do you like about yourself: i mean i tend to refuse to back down on most things so i guess dedication is a way to make that sound positive??????

39. piercings: honestly i dont think i could ever get a piercing they weird me out for myself they say as they have a tattoo and are planning like half a dozen more

40. blood type: o+ which i guess is a pretty versatile type

41. nickname: no-one actually calls me this but my fave for me would just be d. the single letter by itself. and it absolutely has to be in lowercase people do also often call me dan and sometimes danny but none of them are at the right friend level and it is a Bad

42. relationship status: single as a pringle for 20 solitary years

43. zodiac: taurus. i was also born in the year of the ox so rip anyone who tries to argue w me

44. pronouns: they/them pls n thnx

45. favourite tv show: i watch like a million different shows and they are all trash but rn my fave is probs coach trip and i hate that most u have never seen it and dont know how much fun it is

46. tattoos: i got a geometric heart on my chest and im planning so many more pls message me about it so i can gush about it to someone

47. right or left handed: right like any good god-fearing person who is not influenced by the devil and witchcraft

48. surgery: ive never had surgery myself and i hope i never will (unless it’s for organ donation)

50. sport: i row, not well but to a vaguely competitive standard and i enjoy it even though my hands are llike permanently callused now

51. vacation: my last one was to boston for a week after the academic year ended but going to mexico over easter was gr9 too

52. pair of trainers: if we’re talking actual proper trainers then ive only got one pair from decathlon but i do have some hella nice vans which i got for p cheap

GENERAL

53. eating: food is good. and not to be stereotypical but chicken is the best. esp rice and peas and chicken. also carbs. there is no such things as too much carbs. the media is lying to you

54. drinking: rum. it might be a bad thing that my first thought was to go to alcohol but idc im a mess

55. I’m about to: idk probs play some more inquisition

56. waiting for: my motivation to return from the war?????? to finish studying so i can move out of my parents’ house and steadily become the family’s queer cryptid

57. want: my parents to shut up and leave me alone. not gonna happen tho

58. get married: yes ofc i do im a fucking romantic mess bicth lemme indulge my fantasies

59. career: philosopher lmao. i get paid to sit around and bullshit all day what could be better

WHICH IS BETTER

60. hugs or kisses: ofc hugs are better lmao they’re just like !!!!! hug me all day idc

61. lips or eyes: eyes ofc, eyes are soft and pure. gimme those fucking eyes

62. shorter or taller: honestly i love me a good height difference either way but like ideally she’d be taller but im like 6′0 on a good day and i have to keep reminding myself that’s kinda tol so taller is unlikely rip me

63. older or younger: idgaf tbh but im amongst the youngest most of the places i go so younger would be nice i guess lmao

64. nice arms or nice stomach: umm idk both are nice and give good #aesthetics but i gotta agree w ilyatath and say goodlegs are the best plus good legs basically ensure a good ass

65. hookup or relationship: i told u im a fucking romantic gimme them sweet ass relationships. make me know that im special and important to u

66. troublemaker or hesitant: honestly hesitant but if my friends are causing trouble bet ur ass imma be there tagging along

HAVE YOU EVER:

67. kissed a stranger: im p sure y’all can guess the answer to this by now lmao

68. drank hard liquor: it’s not a real drink unless there’s liquor in it

69. lost glasses/contact lenses: one time i lost a pair of glasses the same day i got them

70. turned someone down: nah this has never happened to me

71. sex on the first date: ive never kissed someone, what else do u think i haven’t done.......

73. had your heart broken: yeah no this hasn’t happened. not properly anyway. like i said, feelings are weird

74. been arrested: it’s not a crime if u dont get caught

75. cried when someone died: nah ive never been close enough to anyone i knew who died

76. fallen for a friend: sorta yes sorta no im weird feelings are odd and my life is a mess

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

77. yourself: i wanna say yes but kinda no my self confidence also needs to return from war

78. miracles: i wanna say i do but im not sure the universe is a fundamentaly chaotic system so i guess weird shit deffo could happen

79. love at first sight: i think some people can get it but i doubt for me and most people will probs have to work for it

80. santa claus: nah that man’s a scam

81. kiss on the first date: if u wanna kiss on the first date then fucking do it!!!!! dont let life hold u back!! dont let ur dreams be memes!!!!! u take their face anfd fucking kiss it!!!!

82. angels: eeehhhhhhhhh probs not

OTHER:

84. eye colour: brown. kinda darker brown than my hair but still brown

85. favourite movie: Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014) directed by Joe Russo and Anthony Russo

#text #they speak #my life #fuck this took longer than i was expecting #but here it is #marvel at the mess that is my life #food tw #alcohol tw

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hyttesanger · 7 years

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If there's one thing Mijoo is being thankful for her nearly ten years experience of gritty training and, it's the extraordinarily keen senses and reflexes she gained, which makes it easy for her to detect the existence of people been spying over her for quite some time.

She prefer them not doing it on her work hours like now, though.

"Sajang-nim, I'm out for awhile." Mijoo chirps in her usual happy-go-lucky tone, taking off her mask and handing it to one of the server. Her hair is disheveled with sweat, the colleague of hers wrinkles his nose in disgust as Mijoo carelessly wipes it with her gloved hand.

"Yah! You've been working for just an hour!" Her boss barks, giving her icy glare.

"It's something very urgent. I'll be back in no time, don't worry, okay?"

Mijoo walks quickly past the park's entrance gate, if her intuition is right, there are approximately four guys trailing her in safe distance. She baits them to follow until they reach narrow backstreet where people don't normally pass, and those people finally make their appearances. What's surprising is, her stalkers are wearing neat attire, too neat for some low level fighters from the stage or thugs she had expected. There are five of them, all men in either leather jacket or suit, some even wearing shades and Mijoo feels like she's in the middle of shooting for cheap, James Bond rip-off movie.

Or maybe Jackie Chan. Because she's still clad in furry brown jumpsuit, complete with paws, and smells like bacon. This will sell as very funny comedy.

"Whatever you guys want, can't it wait until my shift's over? I'm kinda in a tight schedule now, you see, it's lunch time soon." She stops by the end of the passage, behind her is tall brick wall, so there's no way out. "Oh and I'd appreciate if you guys could tell me a little about this person who sent you—"

The men do charging forward against her instead of answering. Because, yeah, formalities are overrated, aren't it?

Despite months of absence from fighting scene, Mijoo still hasn't lose her touch, easily dodging punch after punch which are badly-aimed. She vaults over pile of empty beer crates abandoned on the ground, split-kicking two men at once, and flinging a crate at the other. The thin woods outright lands and breaks on his head, knocking him down unconscious.

"Welp. You're all pieces of shit." Mijoo seizes a guy when they're about to runaway, the one who seems to be the sloth of their team, by the back of his collar. Hurling him to the hard concrete, she stomps big bear foot across his chest, looming over him closely. Not a face Mijoo has ever seen before.

"Spill! Who is it? I don't remember having bad blood against anyone in the stage before." If it's someone from the stage, then it's weird. Why bother sending people and not face her by themselves? They might be illegal fighters but as far as Mijoo remembers the regulars on their venue don't lack the spirit of fair fight, so much to do such chicken act as hiring people to beat her outside the stage. It's also questionable if one of them had money to pay these high caliber gangsters.

"You're being deceived." The guy hisses. "That woman you're dating. She's married to her company's CEO."

Mijoo stills. Stares at her attacker as though he's grown another head and it's green, with antennas.

Then they seep into her, the words that guy just said. And it makes her want to vomit. She doesn't even notice when he's pulling out a knife, aiming it right towards her face. With barely a split second to evade, the sharp object succesfully slashes few inches of the side of Mijoo's face. She groans, staggering backwards, and the man takes it as his only chance to flee. Mijoo also doesn't bother going after him.

A moment later, she crumples down. Panting hard, cold sweat and blood running over her cheek.

Soojung's been married. What the fuck is that? ——————— Soojung frowns, leaning against the armrest of velvety sofa in Korean Air's premium lounge, scrolling randomly through her phone which hasn't rung at all today. It's almost midday, the people from airline just informed that her flight back home will be delayed for another hour. Right now, when she's terribly tired and in need for her dose of daily dumbness, Mijoo doesn't call or send her any message. She's also not the type who would make a call first, so all Soojung does is just huffing in annoyance every few minutes. The action makes her secretary's blood run cold. Her mobile does ring, finally, when Soojung is about to give in and write some threat message demanding some attention from that foolish girlfriend of hers. But it's from Burger Bear owner, and Soojung straigthens up in her seat reading the message. Good afternoon, Miss Lee. Sorry to disturb you, but do you perhaps know if something has happened to Lee Mijoo? She went for short break this morning and haven't come back until now. I haven't heard anything from her as well today. Can you reach her on phonecall? Nope, connected straight to voicemail. Actually I don't want to say this.. But I'm a little worried since I saw few people were following behind her when she left us few hours ago. ——————— Flight from Singapore to South Korea took a little over six hours, so it's already evening when Soojung reached Mijoo's home. Nobody answered her knock on the door, neither it's locked when she tried to twist the rusty knob. Walking inside, Soojung soon finds Mijoo on her usual old couch, curling into ball with knees hugged close to her chest and head buried in them. She wears a maroon sweater despite warm temperature in the room, its hood completely covering her face from sight. A metal ashtray is present above the table before her, filled with cigarette dust to the brim, few empty boxes and lighter from Soojung beside it. Soojung grabs the ashtray, throwing all the contents into trash bin below the desk. "You skipped work to smoke? Really?" When she gets no response, Soojung begins to sound angry. "Mijoo, answer me." She steps closer, trying to pull away the hoodie. "Hey—" "Don't touch me!" Another hand swats hers harshly as soon as it meets the soft garment. Soojung's eyes widen when the hood falls down, revealing long, dried wound along the left side of Mijoo's face, from the temple down to her cheek. "What happened to you?" "Go ask your husband. And take that lighter back, it's his, isn't it?" Clanking sound reverberates as the ashtray falls from Soojung’s hand to the floor. "He... He did that to you?" "You admit that you're married?" Now Mijoo's turning straight at her girlfriend, eyes hostile with rage and betrayed feeling. It takes long before Soojung finds her ability to speak back. "Where's the first aid kit? Let me tend that first, it would leave a scar if you ignore it any longer." ——————— "My parents' company went bankrupt three years ago. We'd been in the red for quite awhile, it wasn't so much of a shocker when that day we could no longer survive finally came. Had it not for his father's help, my parents most likely would be in jail right now. It was only natural for them to offer something in return. So they sold me to be his wife, then disappeared to somewhere even myself don't know." Mijoo doesn't flinch or even make any sounds when Soojung wipes her wound and applies an antiseptic ointment ever so carefully. Only her eyes move following whatever the older woman's doing. "It isn't hard, though. Last year he took over the whole company after his father decided to retire. Nowadays he's barely home and when he is, all he wants is sex. Maybe more on the rough side, but let's not talk about that." She finishes sticking two band-aids to cover the cut. They are cute, with tiny cats pattern, but sadly in this current situation, Soojung can't even laugh as she normally would, or ask how did those plasters ended up in Mijoo's first aid box. "To be honest I'm surprised he went as far as to send someone to did this to you. He usually wouldn't care anything about me." The woman sits so straight up on a plastic stool facing her girlfriend. Ironic. She remembers the first time confessing her feeling towards Mijoo in this very place. Now, she's readying herself for an upcoming break up, also here. "When you came here that night..." Mijoo begins tentatively. Image of bruised knee comes to mind. And few other little scars Mijoo sometimes saw here and there on Soojung's body, but too ignorant to ever ask. God, how could she'd never realized it sooner. "I really fell from stairs. Only, it was him pushing me off." Soojung tries to say it as lightly as possible. Yet the pain is there, behind her void voice. "Now think about it... I've never rejected him before. It's probably what had led him to think I have someone else, hence this attack." "It's just— After we began dating, I don't want anyone else to touch me. It disgusts me." "What he did to you is plain violence!" Mijoo snaps. Still angry, though it's for entirely different reason this time. "Having your name in his family register doesn't legitimate that! Why didn't you report him to the police and appeal for divorce?" "I can, but debt is still debt. He doesn't only have my name on his family register but also loan agreement paper. I'm getting pretty good salary every month and a position in the company which no one would ever be able to reach unless they have at least ten years work experience. It's wiser to endure this and save money until I can pay him, then file a divorce." "How much?" "Right now, it's about a little over four billion." "Four billion?!" When she asked, Mijoo was expecting the worst. But this is worst of the worst. "Christ, we're so fucked up." "Me, not we." Soojung corrects. "It's my problem, I wouldn't drag you into this. We should stop seeing each other." "What if I say I refuse?" Soojung blinks. "What does that mean?" "You dense." Mijoo clucks her tongue. "You're the one who'd stolen my heart and dragged me into your life, saying you like me out of nowhere, bossing me around... Now I refuse to leave like this. I don't want us to break up." "I—" But Soojung cannot say more. She looks away, biting her lips so hard it might bleed. Overwhelming emotions hit her like bullets, one after another. This is unfair. Why can't Mijoo just hate her? She doesn't expect love or deserve one. "Tell me one thing, Lee Soojung." Mijoo says. "Do you love me?" "Why did you follow me that night when you saw me going to the stage? Why did you stay even after you found out I was an illegal fighter? Why did you help me becoming a better person?" Soojung only shakes her head. Mijoo watches her face tenses up as she's gritting her teeth, her mask of unemotional slowly shatters. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop this. "Why did you ask me out? You knew that there's high chance things wouldn't go well between us, and that you couldn't keep me in the dark forever about your true self. Why did you still want to be with me?" "Because I love you!” She yells at last. “Back then I didn't want to fall in love, didn't want to feel this... feeling of needing someone. I'd given up and didn't want anything. But then you appeared, and I started wanting everything! For you to forgive me and accept me despite how broken I am." Pot calling kettle black, huh? Right now, Soojung feels no different than jerk of a man who'd taken Nicole away. Without her husband's wealth, she doesn't even have a single penny. "I was scared, you know? I was so scared I kept seeing nightmare of you leaving me!" Soojung's mind's clamoring with dark words; as soon as she blurts it out, more coming over. I'm filthy. I'm not worthy. Why would Mijoo even let me touch her? It's like all hell break loose. The more she tries to calm down, the more her heart rumbling. Until Mijoo springs off of her seat, doubling over before Soojung. She grabs her hands, kissing and squeezing them tightly like it's so precious and not stained with dirty lies. "Then it's enough..." The anger that was on those deep, dark eyes has gone. This time, it's a totally different gaze - it's sincerity and love. And letting herself submerging into them makes some sense of safety, of belonging, to fill Soojung's numb heart. "All I've ever needed to hear is you love me, and that's it, Soojung. Will you trust me? We can go through this together, or even if we can't, I'll sit in the dark forever with you. I'll never abandon you." And then, one idea presents itself inside Mijoo's mind.

———————

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viralhottopics · 7 years

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Exclusive: Bestselling author E. Lockhart to publish a new YA novel

Image: delacorte press

Bestselling author E. Lockhart has a new YA novel hitting shelves this fall.

SEE ALSO: Read an exclusive excerpt of Jeff Zentner’s upcoming ‘Goodbye Days’

Announced today, Lockhart’s Genuine Fraud will be released Sept. 5 by Delacorte Press, and imprint of Random House Children’s Books.

Edgy and inventive, Genuine Fraud is an instantly memorable story of love, betrayal and entangled relationships that are not what they seem. Lockhart introduces readers to the story of Imogen and JuleImogen, a runaway heiress, an orphan, a cook and a cheat; Jule, a fighter, a social chameleon and an athlete. This is a novel about intense friendship, a disappearance, murder, bad romance, a girl who refuses to give people what they want from her and a girl who refuses to be the person she once was. Who is genuine? And who is a fraud? You be the judge.

Lockhart is a staple in the YA world, and she’s perhaps best known for her haunting We Were Liars, a deluxe edition of which will be published this May.

MashReads spoke to Lockhart about Genuine Fraud, her career, and her advice for 2017. Then read on for an exclusive excerpt of her upcoming novel.

When did you first know you wanted to be a writer?

I read Joan Aikens The Wolves of Willoughby Chase in third or fourth grade and immediately began writing novels about Victorian orphanages, windswept landscapes and cool uniforms.

What draws you to writing YA books?

In young adulthood, people separate from the values and embraces of their families of origin and begin to define themselves as individuals. That process of separation and self-reinvention is extremely interesting to me. Genuine Fraud is very much a YA novel, even though it doesnt take place in high school.

Is your writing process different depending on the genre youre writing?

Genuine Fraud is a psychological thriller, and the only other such book I have written is We Were Liars. All my other books are comedies! The thrillers have intricate plots that require more planning.

Genuine Fraud sounds a bit like an oxymoron. Do you have a favorite oxymoron?

Film producer Samuel Goldwyn is often quoted as saying, I never liked you, and I always will. My new novel is in something of the same spirit.

Genuine Fraud is another suspense novel, like your emotional bestseller We Were Liars. Can you give a hint as to the emotions readers are likely to have?

Both books have twisty plots, but with Genuine Fraud youre unlikely to need a tissue. Rather, I recommend Rolaids and seltzeryoull want a strong stomach.

Youre known for writing incredibly strong and complex female characters, particularly Frankie Landau-Banks, who is seen by many as a feminist icon. The women in Genuine Fraud seem to be in a similar vein. Do you feel you have a responsibility as a YA writer?

Thank you. I am a feminist, most certainly, but my responsibility as a novelist is not to provide role models. My responsibility is to try to write something that feels true to me on some emotional and intellectual level. I write to make a piece of narrative art that represents the inside of my head. I hope that if I have done so well enough, people will respond to it.

As its a new year, what is your advice for your readers for 2017, both for life and for aspiring writers?

Raise your voice. Its an everyday practice. As a writer, as an activist, as a friend and colleague, student or teacherraise your voice in protest, in apology, in curiosity, in praise, in self-expression.

What were some of your favorite books of 2016?

I read a lot of travel stories and novels written in the nineteenth century. I read cookbooks and middle-grade fiction and comic essays. But Genuine Fraud is a complicated portrait of an extremely difficult person, and a twisty thriller as welland here are two 2016 books I read while I was revising it that fit that same description and are incredibly juicy: Girls on Fire by Robin Wasserman is an adult novel about young women behaving more than badly, raw and gorgeous. My Sister Rosa by Justine Larbalestier is a YA novel about a boy whose younger sister is a psychopathchilling and thought-provoking.

Image: Delacorte press

It was a bloody great hotel.

The minibar in Jules room stocked potato chips and four different chocolate bars. The bathtub had bubble jets. There was an endless supply of fat towels and liquid gardenia soap. In the lobby, an elderly gentleman played Gershwin on a grand piano at four each afternoon. You could get hot clay skin treatments, if you didnt mind strangers touching you. Jules skin smelled like chlorine all day.

The Playa Grande Resort in Baja had white curtains, white tile, white carpets, and explosions of lush white flowers. The staff members were nurselike in their white cotton garments. Jule had been alone at the hotel for nearly four weeks now. She was eighteen years old.

This morning, she was running in the Playa Grande gym. She wore custom sea-green shoes with navy laces. She ran without music. She had been doing intervals for nearly an hour when a woman stepped onto the treadmill next to her.

This woman was younger than thirty. Her black hair was in a tight ponytail, slicked with hair spray. She had big arms and a solid torso, light brown skin, and a dusting of powdery blush on her cheeks. Her shoes were down at the heels and spattered with old mud.

No one else was in the gym.

Jule slowed to a walk, figuring to leave in a minute. She liked privacy, and she was pretty much done, anyway.

You training? the woman asked. She gestured at Jules digital readout. Like, for a marathon or something? The accent was Mexican American. She was probably a New Yorker raised in a Spanish-speaking neighborhood.

I ran track in secondary school. Thats all. Jules own speech was clipped, what the British call BBC English.

The woman gave her a penetrating look. I like your accent, she said. Where you from?

London. St. Johns Wood.

New York. The woman pointed to herself.

Jule stepped off the treadmill to stretch her quads.

Im here alone, the woman confided after a moment. Got in last night. I booked this hotel at the last minute. You been here long?

Its never long enough, said Jule, at a place like this. So what do you recommend? At the Playa Grande? Jule didnt often talk to other hotel guests, but she saw no harm in answering. Go on the snorkel tour, she said. I saw a bloody huge moray eel.

No kidding. An eel?

The guide tempted it with fish guts he had in a plastic milk jug. The eel swam out from the rocks. She must have been eight feet long. Bright green.

The woman shivered. I dont like eels.

You could skip it. If you scare easy.

The woman laughed. Hows the food? I didnt eat yet.

Get the chocolate cake.

For breakfast?

Oh, yeah. Theyll bring it to you special, if you ask.

Good to know. You traveling alone?

Listen, Im gonna jet, said Jule, feeling the conversation had turned personal. Cheerio. She headed for the door.

My dads crazy sick, the woman said, talking to Jules back. Ive been looking after him for a long time. A stab of sympathy. Jule stopped and turned.

Every morning and every night after work, Im with him, the woman went on. Now hes finally stable, and I wanted to get away so badly I didnt think about the price tag. Im blowing a lot of cash here I shouldnt blow.

Whats your father got?

MS, said the woman. Multiple sclerosis? And dementia. He used to be the head of our family. Very macho. Strong in all his opinions. Now hes a twisted body in a bed. He doesnt even know where he is half the time. Hes, like, asking me if Im the waitress.

Damn.

Im scared Im gonna lose him and I hate being with him, both at the same time. And when hes dead and Im an orphan, I know Im going to be sorry I took this trip away from him, dyou know? The woman stopped running and put her feet on either side of the treadmill. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. Sorry. Too much information.

Sokay.

You go on. Go shower or whatever. Maybe Ill see you around later.

The woman pushed up the arms of her long-sleeved shirt and turned to the digital readout of her treadmill. A scar wound down her right forearm, jagged, like from a knife, not clean like from an operation. There was a story there.

Listen, do you like to play trivia? Jule asked, against her better judgment.

A smile. White but crooked teeth. Im excellent at trivia, actually.

They run it every other night in the lounge downstairs, said Jule. Its pretty much rubbish. You wanna go?

What kind of rubbish?

Good rubbish. Silly and loud.

Okay. Yeah, all right.

Good, said Jule. Well kill it. Youll be glad you took a vacation. Im strong on superheroes, spy movies, YouTubers, fitness, money, makeup, and Victorian writers. What about you?

Victorian writers? Like Dickens?

Yeah, whatever. Jule felt her face flush. It suddenly seemed an odd set of things to be interested in.

I love Dickens.

Get out.

I do. The woman smiled again. Im good on Dickens, cooking, current events, politics… lets see, oh, and cats.

All right, then, said Jule. It starts at eight oclock in that lounge off the main lobby. The bar with sofas.

Eight oclock. Youre on. The woman walked over and extended her hand. Whats your name again? Im Noa.

Jule shook it. I didnt tell you my name, she said. But its Imogen.

Jule West Williams was nice-enough-looking. She hardly ever got labeled ugly, nor was she commonly labeled hot. She was short, only five foot one, and carried herself with an up-tilted chin. Her hair was in a gamine cut, streaked blond in a salon and currently showing dark roots. Green eyes, white skin, light freckles. In most of her clothes, you couldnt see the strength of her frame. Jule had muscles that puffed off her bones in powerful arcslike shed been drawn by a comic book artist, especially in the legs. There was a hard panel of abdominal muscle under a layer of fat in her midsection. She liked to eat meat and salt and chocolate and grease.

Jule believed that the more you sweat in practice, the less you bleed in battle.

She believed that the best way to avoid having your heart broken was to pretend you dont have one.

She believed that the way you speak is often more important than anything you have to say.

She also believed in action movies, weight training, the power of makeup, memorization, equal rights, and the idea that YouTube videos can teach you a million things you wont learn in college.

If she trusted you, Jule would tell you she went to Stanford for a year on a track-and-field scholarship. I got recruited, she explained to people she liked. Stanford is Division One. The school gave me money for tuition, books, all that.

What happened?

Jule might shrug. I wanted to study Victorian literature and sociology, but the head coach was a perv, shed say. Touching all the girls. When he got around to me, I kicked him where it counts and told everybody who would listen. Professors, students, the Stanford Daily. I shouted it to the top of the stupid ivory tower, but you know what happens to athletes who tell tales on their coaches.