#its 3am in the morning and im tired of thinking | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rattymess · 4 months

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I'd like to think that Llewyn Davis just absolutely ADORES sleeping on your stomach. Doesn’t matter where you are, whether you’re just on the couch or on the bed, he’d still lay his head on you. Even if you try to push him off, he’d always win in the end, stating that he’d get off “in five minutes, baby” (he never does). Sometimes, he’d even grab his guitar with him and just start humming while lazily playing the chords. Those were the times when you actually can’t find it in yourself to push him off. He just seems so in his element, when you can barely see the sunken eyebags under his eyes, when you can see the tiny wrinkles forming by his eyebrows as he's concentrating on his finger placement. By the time he’s done, you’re already yawning off into dreamland, unaware that that was exactly what he was aiming for.

#llewyn davis #llewyn davis x reader #its 3am in the morning and im tired of thinking #why not write a drabble

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way2gosuperrstarr · 1 year

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errrrr my take on an mc design { @ˊꈊˋ@ } with a little bit of my own "flair" to it of course (^_−)☆

aand by that i mean just mixing some of my own personal sona design elements into it ! lmaoo so nothing too crazy. just about average

this was fun .....! she's cute as hell i think i love them sm

i kinda just fucked around and found out with the uniform erm i think it looks. okay.

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strrshine · 1 year

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not sso but im about to set the sony vegas pro building on fire im so frustrated ive had so many SO many problems rendering this one video and when it finally worked and got past the 40% mark after taking like 2 days to figure it out, as it reaches 100% and ive already mentally celebrated, it then says that my device cannot recognize it or some shit and i think i nearly let a tear slip ngl

#very much considering just pirating to get svp 20 ... svp 15 you've done me wonders for the past couple of years but its time to go #idk why its just been having so many problems recently and its so fucking aggravating #think i might definitely switch and i thinkkkk you can infact move your project from lower versions to upper so #hopefully no problems there. i dont wanna have to fucking re edit a 25 minute video im literally gonna cry #god im just genuinely like i want to punch a window im sorry can i just let my anger out here #im gonna figure it out in the morning cause im tired rn and its like almost 3am #please wish all the best for me i cant do this anymore #the video had so many specific like cuts and shit i dont wanna have to fucking re do ALL of that #okay good night

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toastsnaffler · 4 months

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I have to be up for work in 3 hours and I'm gonna be real I think ive hit the point where I might not be getting any sleep at all. for fucks sake.

#ive survived all nighters before ill scrape through the day itll just be Rough. at least i dont have much in my schedule #im not gonna take the dose this morning bc i think thats a really bad idea to do on zero hours sleep #and i can't risk two consecutive all nighters. like I have done that before but not while working full time 💀 its not worth it #drafting an email to my doctor to let her know im skipping day 2 + ask advice re. whether its worth resuming again on day 3 #bc she did list 'trouble sleeping' as a common symptom that often passes but i need to know a) how long it usually takes to pass and-#b) if this is unusually bad + would she rec supplementing with a sleep aid or just switching tack entirely and trialling a non stimulant #by this stage of the night i dont think its actually acting anymore bc i took it at 7am and its now 3am. it shouldnt last that long #i think its more just triggered my preexisting insomnia. my ability to sleep is very very sensitive sometimes + hates routine changes #just so fucking frustrating bc ive spent the past 2 months nailing my sleep routine + ive had a couple weeks of being able to-#go to bed like 9:30-10 and it only takes an hour to get to sleep and i get usually a good 7 hours sometimes 8 only waking once halfway #and i dont feel like utter shit like yeah im tired but from work not so much lack of sleep.... and now thats all fucked lmao #whatever. maybe i should just take the next dose anyway #ill see. gonna try to sleep for another 2 hours but once it hits 5 im not doing this anymore ive been trying for six hours already man #i cant even remember when i last pulled a full all nighter. it might be longer than 6 months ago... i was doing so well :-(#im so mad i was so hopeful it would have SOME good effect like ik its not a miracle worker + these things take time but so many people-#seem to have an immediate positive response even if its probably a placebo. and i got fuck all except This.#i was searching on the reddit for sleep issues and other ppl only seem to report bad ones on higher doses or years in..#like damn. do i even have adhd then. ik thats a stupid thing to think bc obvs everyones body metabolises meds differently etc but still #it is ALMOST HALF 3 and i am FUCKING TIRED #UGH. alright bedtime round 189447383 #.diaries #.vent

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gabessquishytum · 9 months

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I only seem to write you here when I’m incoherently tired so sorry in advance.

Im thinking about the wonder that hob and dream look on the world with together. Mr “they invented chimneys” and mr “I’ve never been a human and was locked in a fishbowl for the largest boom of human technical innovation” find joy in /everything/. Running water?? That’s hot?? Every type of food from the whole world available in a ten minute walk??? The fucking internet???? You can call a helpline if you’re sad??? Super tall buildings??? Making tea together every morning and there’s so many kinds? They wake up on different brightly colored sheets each day because dye is no longer as expensive as gold. Dream takes the tube so much he becomes a local cryptid. They stand and hold hands in the national portrait gallery. They watch every rocket launch livestream, no matter what time. They look on Hobs young students with joy. There’s new kinds of bread to eat, new shows opening. New languages to learn (for hob at least) new technology to break with his presence (for dream). There’s cat cafes and science museums and tesco and so many books coming out every day. They love the world together

-🦐

Oh I'm so soft about them!!

I'm convinced that sometimes Hob just has to go lie down on the floor and have a little cry over the sheer availability of THINGS. Abundance is the ultimate joy for any hedonist, let alone one who's been around since 1389. Imagine the delight he takes in Poundland, in international food buffets, in public transportation!! I'm fully convinced that one of Hob’s greatest love affairs is with the London Underground. It's there, under your feet! All the time! You can travel to the other side of town (not necessarily quickly, but it's quicker than walking... sometimes).

Mr Depression Personified, freshly unfishbowled Dream of the Endless, is gonna seem like he just took a fat dose of Duloxetine every time he hangs out with Hob. The joy is bone deep, and so infectious. Watching Hobplay Just Dance at 3am because he just remembered that he owns a Wii genuinely heals some part of Dream that shattered long, long ago.

Imagine what it's like for Hob, as well. Spending time with someone who knows that he's actually a medieval peasant who's lived well past his sell-by date. He gets to be honest in his excitement for things like ibuprofen and chocolate flavoured vodka. He can go to museums with Dream, and Dream will understand why he gets that distant misty look in his eyes when he sees a certain familiar object.

Other people can stare or laugh at Hob’s joy, but Dream will never do that. Its never silly or funny to see Hob rave about some entirely ordinary object, it's just. Important. And quite beautiful. For Dream, it's possibly the most beautiful thing in the world.

#🦐 anon #the sandman #dreamling #dream x hob

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stay-midnight · 1 year

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hi hello!

. . . 🎙

understandable about the grades part-only god and thousands of others know the struggle 🤐 and its finee hehe

in the meanwhile- some short thoughts about college au with skz! (inspired yet again by the previous ask-college au's can get predictable indeed however it does certainly help 🤧)

3am noodles and snacks with a tired chan, ranting to eachother about your struggles (on some nights, he asks you to fuck his problems away, he'd also be happy to do the same for you, when both of you are too tired, its riding and moaning for eachother.)

academic rivals with minho, both of you can't seem to control yourselves with the pettiness, the insults and the competitiveness (eventually it climaxes into hushed hate sex in a library-gagged with his boxers, his harsh words and brutal movements making you cry. might eventually develop into something more between the two of you.)

music major changbin, who confidently says that he'll make it big one day and hopes that you'll continue to be his number 1 fan (in the process of making certain tracks-he records your moans to use for his song as he fucks up into you, experimenting with the difference in sounds you make when he's choking you, or gurgling on his cock.)

art student and hopeless romantic hyunjin, constantly making small doodles of him and you that he passes in class, maling the cutest sticky notes that he leaves around in your stuff. (sometimes, you wake up covered in hyunjin's cum and writing on your body as he takes a picture, inspiration for his drawings, with consent ofc.)

perv bestfriend and roommate jisung, who constantly jerks off everyday to his perverted thoughts of you, and is even shameless enough to whisper the most sinful things in your ear while studying in a library, brushing it off as jisung just joking around and hiding the bulge in your pants... until one day something makes him snap. (he knows by now that you're aware of how serious he is when he "jokes" about how submissive and breedable you are for him, evidenced by you turning quiet when he touches you. so one night he pounces on you and forces you to admit all of the fantasies you'd been having about him, determined to make all of his perverted thoughts come true.)

fratboy felix, who despite the reputation of his frathouse, is an absolute sweetheart that bakes you treats and remind you to drink water. (except in the bedroom, where his heavy accent and a behavior fit for a stereotypical fratboy shine through, cocky and vulgar as he pushes you down the mattress.)

tutor seungmin who makes sure you don't fail and teaches in ways that help you understand easier, patient and loving as he doesn't wanna make you feel bad for not picking up as fast as others. (sometimes however, he punishes you to remind you to take it seriously, cockwarming him while wearing a cockring as you get spanked for every question you get wrong.)

fashionista jeongin, who makes sure both of you still look cute in matching outfits despite pulling dreadful all nighters (his annoying smirk in the morning whenever he see's you limping on the way to class due to him deciding that fucking you was way better than studying for an upcoming exam, even thinking of the marks he left on you as a compliment to your outfit.)

no need to add much to this one, just some nice thoughts to daydream about 😈🤧👀💕

dun dun dun I'm here— drained but still alive and kicking!

;-; my overachiever ass cannot live without those numbers i hate it tbh🥲

Ooh, im answering this first and hopefully the rest tomorrow cuz my bin fic is done so i got a rest day to answer asks! tomorrow-

Bottom / Switch Chan agenda is always welcome, and knowing college chan would always be sleep-deprived lazy sex is the way to go– passionate nights rarely come and go but when it does expect a ride (literally) or ofc expect to drive (literally) he is so my soul animal

I definitely see it, like the rivalness is not unnoticed but Minho definitely does it to push your buttons for his amusement, hate sex (maybe even battle for dominance but we know who'll win those) degradation and humiliation is the specialties here and somehow everyone is on the minho gagging reader with his boxers agenda and im all for it cuz its so hot.

Definitely a music major, in one of his projects not so innocent noises were added to it but of course blended well with the music- ehem. Changbin would definitely fuck you while playing one of his originals as well as concert dates are common— oh and speciality is loud fucking and hair pulling.

Yes! Art major hyunjin and another thing to note is that he would love to try painting you while your chained up and crying with a vibrator up the ass— he finds beauty in cruelty sometimes and sometimes he would paint you then fuck you after his nude painting of you — speciality is wax play suprisingly loves your grunts as he pours melting candle wax over your skin

Perv Jisung (the best jisung trope wbk) as your best friend with pining along with consistent sexual innuendos ! I would see him loving talking dirty into your ear everywhere— his speciality is exhibitionism (probably into threesomes too) and he loves watching you shy against his advances

The innocent frat boy who controls the frat house secretly— Felix Navidad will definitely love to give you treats cuz he would work in a bakery nearby for students and because of that he fucks you on the bathroom of the bakery while being the most smug, cocky bitch on the planet is he absolutely destroys you- of courss being the fratboy he is — his main speciality is ding ding- breeding— cuz he keeps you full in more ways than his baked goods

Ah Seungmin, the star of the skz college aus (its a truth that im spreading) Mans being your tutor as well as running for valedictorian— so yes he teaches you stuff, bending you over and thrusting into you for every question you get wrong and do not even ask him to copy or to cheat cuz his punishments are the worst— strict to you and even more stricter to your studies though he loves to fuck you dumb- Speciality is Punishment, cant have naughty students and failing students that tutors because of his reputation on his slate-

Fashion major Jeongin shining through huehue– on top of making different clothes that are tailor made– he loves making you beg as he fingers you while getting measurements professionally- expect him to make you wear amazing clothes but at the same time not too revealing or drool worthy cuz Jeongin does not want anyone else to steal you from him- behind those dimples lie a demon. Speciality of course is Marking as those marks contribute to your style , his words not mine-

#midnight asks #midnight posts #🎙️ anonnie #fic talk anonnie

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scarsmood · 2 years

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clinical lycanthropy

Content warning: abuse, violence, symptoms of delusions and trauma

I wanted to document my experience with clinical lycanthropy so people may understand exactly what it encompasses for me as an individual. My experience is going to vary from others but typically i think people are under the impression you mental shift or experience transformation on a non physical level.

Since I can’t afford therapy (we love america) it has come back since mine is based in trauma. Without trauma therapy it has come back.

Here’s what I experience:

Pseudoseizures- often to me feel like left over energy from trying and failing to shift. I get those twice a day now.

Nervous system overstimulation- my highly sensitive nerves are more raw and on end than usual because of the stress from shifting every night and turning into an animal

Emotional ups and downs- my emotions are more animalistic and raw. You cry some days you snarl at people. Its very hard for me to control my emotions and impulsivity since im tired and have the urge to turn into an animal that can’t perceive consequences

No more late nights- my clock for friends stops at 9pm now. Typically i used to stay out till 2-3am but now I have to be in a designated safe space by 9pm. I have 2 hours from when i first feel the urge to shift starts. That gives me time to either drive home or improvise and find somewhere safe for me to sleep.

Shifts- painful and disorienting. My m-shifted mind has its own set of values and associations to objects. I notice routine is the most benefit and anything related to my bed or my own smell is comforting since it means i was there before. My personality definitely anxious wolf type behavior. I’ve growled at walls because shadows make them look slightly different

Diet changes- I’ll eat more (ig that helps the developing eating disorder lol) i now crave blood and organ meat often and a lot, along with beef or goat. Though sometimes i just want water filled vegtables.

Exhaustion- staying up till 3am every night cause your a scared dog pacing its enclosure is not fun on your body. I am in pain often and tired more so.

Friend averse- I don’t wanna make friends. I don’t want to talk to people. I often want to cut any ties i can. This is due to the stickied add on to this delusion that a werewolf is a monster and it’s better people don’t interact with those. Touching and hugging takes much more of my tolerance now and i wouldnt be suprised if i snarled at someone now instead of just being polite

Sadism- hunting and killing animals at night is what my brain wants to do every night now. Issue being. Everything is an animal. It typically triggers when im starving and never ate that day. Some days i just want to eat anything i can. Including people. I do remember that i can recognize faces to some degree but its more like flipping a coin and not a garenteed thing.

Strained muscles- my werewolf self loves over excerting itself and doing stupid things. Sometimes seizures or particularly active nights i wake up with strained muscles.

Inability to understand human society- as this continues the passive inflection to understand how humans and human culture works will slowly leave me. Until i feel completely alien and rejected from society. This often turns to anger and anxiousness. Which can trigger day time shifts.

Inability to read, write and understand language- as time progresses i may slowly loose these abilities. During shifts I completely loose them until I wake up the next morning. I can learn commands similar to other animals but i cannot understand english if that makes sense.

Red eyes- I’m not at this point (yet) but as my delusion gets stronger it’ll come back. Red eyes is a trigger state while I’m m-shifted that is 100% rage. This is how I’ve attempted to attack and kill my previous partner due to abuse. Red eyes is fun that it isn’t an if but a when. Each shift that doesn’t trigger a red eyes moment adds onto the pressure to trigger a red eyes shift. Similiar to setting a bear trap each m-shift is another additional weight against the spring until it sets off. This in particular is why I stopped having irl friends before trauma treatment. As i am simply straight up dangerous to be around. Not even a muzzle is gonna fix that shit.

Chaotic mindset- my mental alignment typically shifts from content and chill to aggitated asshole. I may start passively picking fights or in general be harder to be around because i am just abrasive. This typically is most apparent with places like jobs or with strangers. I seem to usually be ok with friends.

I just like this song rn have it as a gift

In short? Being an actual werewolf is stressful. My suicide risk probably went up 70% if this keeps up. Because living in constant pain, fear and anxiety of a world you do not understand that is working against you is extremely stressful.

Would I ever recommend someone to try werewolf’ing? No

#delusion #clinical lycanthropy #otherkin #therian #endel #Spotify

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alphiemar · 2 years

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i beat pikmin 1 for the first time today, i think it was under 4 hours or something? idunno, i have played pikmin 1 many times but i just never beat it until today! i really like all of the endings, but i like how in the good ending olimar gets to wave goodbye, i think it's sweet

aaaarghh im so tiredits my fault thoughfor desiciding to draw at 1 in the morning!!!!!!! ALSO, there is something SO OFF about this drawing and i have no idea what it is, i think it's just the way olimar looks in general, i mean look at his hand lol?Actually dont look ignore that i tried so hard to fix it

im so tire,d GOODNGHt its like 3am HELP!!!!the way his hand looks i cant its funny sorry my captions are long i got a lot to say sometimes i like to speak nonsense THERE ARE SO MANY PARTS I JUST DIDNT COLOR iN COMPLETELY its like a Where's waldo 😭 find where i didnt color in correctly

"i spy with my little eye something that isnt colored in" "is it the antenna thing?" "yes!!!!"

my pikmin artstyle is SO inconsistent idk how to fix that, i think its just cuz sometimes i try to make it look ok, but sometimes im like "they literally look like peanuts i do not care how i draw them" so it gets inconsistent when i try and when i dont idk whatever

#pikmin #olimar #olimar pikmin #HALP!!!!!!!!!#looks weeirrd #immm going to bednow

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langermanns · 1 month

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vi. another post from michael. vague trigger warning.

so here we go again. its 3am and i have been doing a lot of thinking. a lot of writing, actually. well not a lot of writing, but enough.

i have been wanting to tell a story. a video game, or a book, or something. i think the reason i have been struggling with it for so long is because part of me wants to create for fun, and the other part wants to get some painful things out of me, but im scared to do so.

the story i have been writing and re-writing for the past decade was supposed to deal with some of those things, but i have gotten shy about it. you can only make a story so dark before it goes from an interesting mystery to a tragedy that makes people uncomfortable. i think the reason we like outlast 2 so much is because it balances those two fairly well. there is a very real, very dark side to outlast 2, but you as the protagonist are removed from it. you are not jessica gray, you are blake. you are a witness to the trauma, not an active participant. blake is traumatized for sure, but it's not the same. a game through the eyes of jessica would be much darker. nobody would play it.

so here i am, struggling to write a story that is removed enough from what i want to essentially vent about. i havent been very successful, so i decided to write a new story. the one from before has warped and changed and announced itself; i have explained the plot to some people, and they've gotten excited to read it. that keeps me from pouring all of myself into it, because i cant give them something so personal. not after i've promised them something they can read.

so, the new story. well, a hypothetical video game, which i will likely never develop. but the story is what matters. its about a person who attempts suicide and wakes up alive the morning after. the player would piece together what happened, and learn about the protagonist's life and the events that led them to this situation. and one of the events in question is kind of just... me projecting trauma.

i dont think i will ever be comfortable just saying what happened. it feels stupid that even here, i cant make myself write it down. so many people can talk about their trauma casually, openly. joke about it, even. but i have to keep secrets. my family doesnt know, and i will keep it that way until they are dead. some of my friends know, and i assume i have alluded to it online, but i dont know who, presently, can look at me and say "this person (removed) ." it feels awful to type that. but the only person who knows the most is my ex. i have... a lot of feelings about that, for another time.

the point is that i cant just talk about it, to anyone. i cant tell anyone directly. most of the reason is the simple lingering fear that somehow my parents will find out, and interrogate me. its not safe with them. one time my mom made a joke about it, when i was getting ready to see a new therapist. i was filling out the form in front of her and she pointed to one of the questions as a joke, saying "better be honest!" so of course i lied. i would have lied anyway, but it made me so angry that she would make a joke like that.

god im getting tired fast. i dont like being michael. i think it makes me more tired. remembering makes me tired. ruminating. addressing reality. im not even stoned. anyway, i guess the point here was that i started writing a story that i think is the closest ive ever come to writing down what happened. it seems like the only way i can address it at all. beating around the bush with fiction. i wrote down a dream i had once, a nightmare, and while it was a real dream, it felt like a vent story. it felt better to write down, to get it out, to say "this awful thing happened, but it was a dream and so it didnt really happen to me."

im hearing voices. need to make another post

#.txt #// michael

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blackvail22 · 8 months

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i really do care for him. i care for him soso deeply. in my dreams i imagine him caring for me too, and him always wanting whats best for me. when i woke up this morning i noticed that somehow in my sleep i made my pillows lay perfectly next to me (instead of under my head) to mimic someone laying next to me. it made me happy when i was still dilericous... when i fully came-to, though, i was disappointed but also shocked. how was i able to do that in my sleep?

im fearful that my intentions here arent pure. maybe i do want him but only because i want someone to love me. i know hes bad for me, and i know that i deserve more. my parents only showed me toxic love as well, so its just what im used to. im scared i only want him because i want the chaos.

a friend said today after i told (what i thought was) a lighthearted story, "honestly--and i dont mean this in a mean way--your life seems so depressing and like you want to kill yourself"

what i wanted to say was, "yeah, and ive tried. and ive always wanted to try again, but theres still people that rely on me, so i cant"

instead i just didnt say anything. its the same friend that tells me to kill myself whenever i kill him enough times in a shooter game. he's the same friend that made a gc of me and everyone that knows me (associated with him) abt how no one likes me.

yeah, i guess ive had a more-depressing-than-normal life, but it could be worse. a part of me thinks i shouldnt kill myself because i have no reason to. its not as bad as it can be, so why would i do it?

im melodramatic.

if im being honest, its probably not even that bad to some people. its normal for my mom to call me names and my dad to---... i mean, at least my mom doesnt hit me, and at least my dad doesnt assault me.

for shit parents, they still arent that bad. i mean, they still provide for me when they dont have to. they still pick me up and take me places when they dont have to.

i dont understand why. . why do they do that?

why did they have to tesch me such a complicated form of love.

why did they have to teach me thats love?

its not love. love is not calling someone a slur when youre mad. love is not telling someone to die or kill themselves because they made you upset. love is not making people do things when you know it makes them uncomfortable to "teach them a lesson"

they show me the love they know, and i honestly feel bad for them, too. they had a rough childhood, but they shouldve worked through it (or at least started) before they had kids.

but still, if none of it turned out the way it did, i may have never met you, apple. so, maybe it turning out this way was for the best. im glad i know you. even if we dont talk to each other very much anymore, and maybe we eventually dont talk at all.... getting to say i knew you, apple, is something ill never take for granted.

its 3am. i had such a rough day at work yesterday. im so tired. all i want to do is cry and scream. im so frustrated, and its not even for good reason. this new coworker of mine is going to make me quit my job. i cannot handle them at all.

thank god i go to counseling on thursday. theres so much i need to say, but none of it has value

i truly feel like im a nobody.

(oh, btw i was right abt her not texting me back abt hanging out w me. yay!!! i have so many people that care about me!!!!!)

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iloveyouw · 1 year

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1 Nov 2022

i wish ud tell me that ur energy was running out. then maybe i will stop taking things for granted. if u ask me, i always thought the times i met u, it was pretty rewarding. can we not agree on that? when im with u times fast and the things we talk about is really not what we will talk about online? u talk about ur past, and ur thoughts and how u view things, i will talk about mine. then we will counter and ask each other and know about each other's way of thinking. i want that. and im sure u want that too. the night before TI i learnt alot about how u view things. and i was 100% confident u will come back to me. and i believe so. u will fall in love with changed jo. and u will come back.

u have changed the way i think. i have never believed that i will not need meth. and u did. now what u believe i think i will manage to change u as well. that is what true love is. and ull realise it sooner. and thats why i am willing to wait. i will wait till the end of time. and i will change.

i know where all this is coming from. im sorry for being frustrated yesterday. i just wish i knew sooner to not push u to ur limits. i wish i was more considerate and stop taking things for granted. i understand that i did. and right now its probably too late. so i have to live with that. i would love to redo this whole thing with u. if only u would let me. i would love to take on a different approach on how i handle things and how i prioritise things.

there are many factors on why u dont want to do this anymore. i get it. i do see it. even if we get pass one, there will be another. even if we get pass this, ultimately im just not someone u love, u just cant see urself be together with someone like me. someone who dont know their self worth.

what im telling u now is that i do see my self worth now. and what ure digging out is the past jo. the past jo dont know her self worth. and everyday that i think i needed meth is a day she dont know her self worth. so yes up until last sept. i dont know my self worth. but i have since been clearer. i have since been aware. and all my life i thought i had self worth and loved myself but thats all fake right, meth masked it. and since i have been learning how to garner all of that from within myself.

and that is fine if u dont want to be with this 50% ready jo u can leave, all im saying is u will come back because by then i will be ready. ready for love and ready to love. and i have all the time in this world till i die because u are what i want. and i will wait for u till i die.

right now we dont have to talk till so far, we can handle things 1 at a time. and right now i will work on my patience. there will not be a next time. if i get frustrated one more time, u block me. and i will be there with u until u feel better. i want to quit my job and give u 100% of my time. i want to quit my job and work on myself too. change the way i think, get proper help. and i want to be there with u physically because i think that helps more. and i can do that everyday. i am going to tender and i will go down everyday to find u till like 3am, then go back sleep and go to work the next day. then go find u at night. and then go work the next day until i have no work then we can hang till morning. and u can come over in the afternoon. then at night i send u back but we can hang till 6am or smth. i just want to maximise my time with u because i know when im with u it helps. and i want to help as much as i can so i want to be with u as much as i can. does that make sense. and i will clear my leave on the week before exams. and i will ask my mom if u can come over to help. because i do need ur help. can u please just let me fight for u properly this time? nothing will get in the way. i will not be frustrated with u ever esp online.

pt2

right now u are prolly very tired of hearing what i have to say. and i dont blame u. but please think of how far weve come. i think we made good progress. with in the beginning i will get frustrated when im with u to right now. where we talk about things out together. yes i will work on the times we are not together. and work on how u feel instead of how tired i am or how busy i am. i will work on those. i just want u to give me a chance, let me show u that i am changed and that u dont have to do anything. u just have to tell me ur thoughts, ur dark thoughts, just as i will tell u mine. and i want to help it go away. if u let me. if u want a break, and i know the previous time the break was messed up, but this time if u need a break u let me know. u can still have my socials, but i will not disturb u. i will go on and think about things too and not go back to meth nor hooking up. i will find peace within myself and find why i am wired this way. i want to cure, and to cure means i need to find the root of my problems. as long as we talk properly i think theres nothing that can't be solved. i want to work things out with u if u let me. please.

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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years

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Why am I thinking about yu yu hakusho in 2021?

#its bc kurama. of course it is #i think abt him a lot unconsciously #and randomly at like 3am i was like. remember when i used to read kurama hiei fics?#and now im obsessively thinking abt kurama #best anime character. so good #im avoiding packing for my flight tomorrow morning bc im v tired #uuuugh i dont wanna get up. i just wanna read and not deal with traveling #if any of my flights get canceled or delayed ill lose my fucking mind #unrelated

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pxrxmoore · 4 years

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°~°

#its 3am and i had a weird fucked up dream #and usually id shake the feeling and go back to bed #but this time my brain fucked me over and i fuckin scared myself #and now im on edge and i legit think i might have to sleep w the light on and i feel big dumb #also ive noticed a spider on the ceiling #hahahaha oh good #great #what tf do i do about that except nothing but panic that its there #its like getting closer to being above me noooooo #aisocokfeowkd #i just wanna sleep lmaooo #nope ok it is above me now gotta move #also for fuckin 90% of quar i stopped dreaming id like to go back to that pls #bc now all my dreams are so fucking weird #and i keep having rly weird ones that give me bad vibes #anyway good evening/morning #im so tired i wanna puke and im so anxious i also wanna puke #🙃#bp

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asianjeremyheere · 4 years

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IM GONNA LOSE MY GODDAMN SHIT

#HELLO???? HELLO????????? IM. I AM. LOSING IT #i am also. going 2 sleep bc its 3am but i. i will continue losing it in the morning 2morrow #god. god. fuck.#hm. would like to edit tjis real quick 2 clarify that a) this is fine i think its a good thing im very excited (i think?) and #b) this wasnt the right sideblog but its here n im tired #so its gonna stay here

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cronchyglass · 5 years

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*sobs while shoving handfuls of slime in my mouth*

#shitpost #help me #shit #i think im funny #big sad #big mood #slime #slime rancher #cloud slime #im tired #its 3 in the morning #its 3am #its me #cronchy #cronch #food #hungry

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sunasjellyfruit · 2 years

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Sleeping with them.

Sleeping. Just sleeping guys. This can be considered as post-timeskip actually.

Warnings: fluff, mentions of food, mentions of sleeping alone, hq boys being soft for you and in love.

Characters: Kurō, Oikawa, Ushiwaka, Sakusa, Atsumu, Suna, Kenma.

Kuroo:

He's not the best partner to sleep with but not the worst either. The problem is that he goes to sleep really late, he spends so much time working that he barely has time at night. So you go to sleep alone most of the time, and when he arrives home he always tries to be as silent as possible not to wake you up (which I think is really cute). However, the moment he enters the bed he'll be holding you tight against his chest because he needs your warmth to fall asleep. In fact it's his body the one which is super warm and in winter it's the best thing to have next to you. The best part about sleeping with him is that he (almost) never wakes up too soon, around 10am more or less, which is the perfect time to enjoy a warm drink for breakfast with the sunlight alredy entering through the window.

Oikawa:

A truly wonderful partner to sleep with. If he has time, it's probably him who cooks dinner every night, and he doesn't like to fo to sleep very late or very early, so I would say that he tries to go to sleep between 11pm and 12pm (00:00? idk bro, you get it). When he lays in bed his body literally occupies the entire bed, legs and arms stretched so you are obligued to lay on top of him. He probably rolls and moves a lot while sleeping so you two end up separated lol. Apart from that, every morning he wakes up at 6am to go for an early morning run and sometimes he also gets freshly baked buns from the bakery, so when he arrives home again (and has a shower) he can wait for you with breakfast ready in you private little balcony.

Ushiwaka:

For real the kind of sleeping partner we all want. He can go to sleep at any possible hour, from 9pm to 3am. You are tired? "Okey honey, let's go. Im not going to leave you alone". You want to watch a film and not sleep barely anything? "Okey, you can even choose the film". And you can clinge onto him as much as you want in your sleep (he sleeps like a rock actually). But the moment the clock reaches 8am, he's awake and there's no way he's going back to sleep again. He might start doing the house chores or some training while you start waking up.

Sakusa:

(This is so funny to think about, but is also so cute omg) He has a very specific night routine that you both must follow before going to sleep, and it includes opening the window of your bedroom for at least 15 minutes to clenease the air of the room, and there's no way you're entering in the same bed as him if you haven't taken a shower first. Once you and the room are refreshed, everything is ready to rest. Sakusa smells like lavender and wood, and now your mind has related that smell to sleeping so it's sleeping for you to rest and relax without him. He knows that, and that's why he tries to go to bed at a decent hour so you can get a good sleep everyday, resting his head in your chest and with your fingers tangled in his black curls. Oh and don't even think of having breakfast in bed, if you want that then go to sleep to the kitchen, not to his bedroom.

Atsumu:

He's the annoying kind of partner if we talk about having a sleeping schedule. Mainly because he doesn't have one, he goes to bed at a different hour everyday. And the fact that he trains a lot doesn't help, cause on some days he wouldn't notice and he would come back home soooo late, and think that he also would have to take a shower, have dinner... So when he lays down its probably like 2am. Other days in which he's tired he goes to sleep incredibly early, 9pm and he's asleep like a baby. Another problem is that he's very loud without even trying, so if you've fallen asleep before him and he wants to get something from your room or finally go to bed, take for granted that you're going to wake up from one way or another. The positive part is that he loves cuddles and he will hug you firmly.

Suna

I don't know how many times I've said this, Suna loves sleeping, loves naps, loves everything related to it, and he also loves you. What can be better than spending every night by the side of his lover? He doesn't go to sleep early, that's for sure, but he doesn't go extremely late, 1am more or less. Mainly because he gets too entertained watching tv shows or with his phone, but if you want to sleep he'll stay in the salon not to bother you. And when he finally starts feeling tired and he goes to sleep, he's the most silent person ever, you won't even notice that someone has stepped into your bed by your side. You might feel his arms around you or his slow breath right by your side, but nothing that can wake you up. However, when the sun rises there's no way to take him outside of the bed. He'll cling into your body as If his life dependes on it, if you let him he would probably wake up at 1pm, just to go get some food, eat and start the day, but if you get serious he might get up sooner.

Kenma.

Sleeping is for the weaks, and he's not weak. He probably thinks that and as long as he has a few energetic drinks near and his computer, he'll stay awake for an entire day or two. You've fallen asleep alone more than once only to wake up finding Kenma in the same position in which you left him the night before. He has tons of work, he's a youtuber-streamer and CEO after all, and he definitely doesn't know how to put some order in his life. You probably need to force him to go to sleep most nights, and he's more than happy to rest for a few hours, but im pretty sure that he would be awake by 7am to keep with his work. And he's very cute when he's asleep, like a kitten, delicate and indefense, and i bet my entire house that he snores quietly, almost like a purr. The best thing you can do for him in the mornings is bring him a warm drink (not necessarily a coffee, tea or some milk with honey works too) and place a jacket over his shoulders.

#Im sleep deprived #Thanks to exams #I actually wrote this at school #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu oneshot #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!!#hq #hq headcanons #haikyuu #anime #haikyuu kenma #haikyuu kenma headcanons #haikyuu kuro #haikyuu oikawa #Im lazy and im not gonna use more hashtags haha #my writing

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