#it's not intentional
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noodles
carmen berzatto x reader | 1.9k | based on this absolutely adorable request from my darling @thecapricunt1616 enjoy it then i am beyond happy 💗🌼🫶🏻
It didn't matter how many times you shook the plastic stick, the little pink plus sign didn't fade. You tossed it in the trash can, where it joined three others with matching pink pluses. You couldn't really get your head around it, you'd been careful, taken things relatively slow..well, kind of.
Things had just progressed a little quicker than you'd expected. One minute you're applying for a hostess job, thinking you probably won't even get an interview, seeing as it was a Michelin-starred hotspot, then next thing you're front and center at a fancy restaurant and spending large portions of your shift flirting with the head chef.
It was never serious flirting, it was just silly and fun. You made flirty comments to everyone, you just particularly meant them with Carmy. He finally seemed to get the hint when you asked him upstairs after he'd dropped you home for the 10th time.
Nothing really happened that night, you just shared a drink, cheap wine from your refrigerator, and made each other laugh with stupid jokes. You told him you meant it when you flirted, he insisted you were joking. It was only when you kissed him that he finally got the message, kissing you back with a fervor that had your head spinning in the most wonderful way.
From there you two developed a relationship that suited you both. You were professional at work, still had some nights apart when you were both exhausted or just needed some alone time. But you had spent hours sitting on his kitchen counter watching him cook, told him stories from your past, encouraged him to tell you some stories too. You watched movies that you didn't pay full attention to, you read your book with your legs over Carm's lap, rolling your eyes with a grin when he would tease you for looking so serious.
It was the best relationship you'd ever been in, and while you weren't sure what the future held, you were positive Carm would be a big part of it, that you two would keep going, develop your relationship.
Sure, you had thought about kids, marriage, a home together etc., but in a kind of just-for-fun-daydreamy kind of way.
Now, one of those things was becoming a reality. It wasn't exactly how you would have planned it, you and Carm weren't even living together. Sure, you stayed at his most nights of the week and had more than a few personal belongings left there, but it wasn't the same.
It felt like moving in should have been the next step. The excitement of starting to really build a foundation together. You were just skipping ahead a step or two, apparently.
Eventually you left the bathroom and chose to sit on your bed for a while instead. You called your doctor and made an appointment, more as a formality. Maybe it would feel more real when your doctor told you rather than seeing it on a plastic stick you'd peed on.
Once you were dressed you went to make a coffee before stopping yourself, wondering if it was ‘allowed’, even though it was so early on. You decided to play it safe, having a herbal tea instead, which you nearly choked on when your phone rang, Carmy's ID flashing up on the screen.
Did he know? How could he know?
“Hey,” You smiled as much as you could, trying to feel normal. “How are you? How is everything?”
You hoped you didn't sound too unusual or not yourself, feeling annoyingly aware of yourself.
“Hey, everything's good,” Carm replied and you felt yourself relax a little. “Just..there's been a slight change of plan for today.”
You stifled a laugh, nothing Carm could say could be a bigger change of plan than an unexpected pregnancy.
“Oh? You raised a brow, lightly tapping your nails against your cup. “What's up?”
“So, it turns out that apparently I promised Richie and Sug that I'd babysit while they have some meetings. I hate to ask when it's your day off but..could you help me?”
You couldn't help but laugh, resting your head on your head on your hand and letting out a soft sigh.
“Of course I'll help, don't worry. When do you need me?”
An couple of hours later, you found yourself at Carmy's apartment, smiling as he opened the door looking flustered, a toddler on his hip and a doll in his hand.
“Perfect timing,” He smiled, stepping aside to let you in. “I'm outnumbered.”
“Who said I'm on your side?” You raised a brow, smiling at the little boy on Carmy's hip and gently stroked his cheek as he giggled. “I'm here to help the kids gang up on you.”
“Oh good,” Carm nodded, lightly tapping you with the doll. “Bring it on.”
You made your way to the living room, smiling as you spotted Eva on the couch, giving her a little wave.
“Hey girly girl,” You grinned, going to sit next to her. “Hope you've been keeping your uncle busy?”
“Yeah,” She giggled, leaning over to you as Carm came into the room. You leaned down, smiling as she whispered in your ear.
A half hour or so later, you went to open the living room door as there was a knock, adjusting the toddler on your hip before opening it and trying to keep a straight face as you met Carm's eyes.
“Hi, can I help you?” You asked, raising a brow.
“Uh, yeah, actually,” Carmy nodded, trying to keep a straight face. “I have an appointment, I'm a little early but..maybe you could squeeze me in?”
“Maybe,” You nodded, biting your lip softly. “Come in, follow me.”
You turned and walked further into the room, gesturing to the couch. “Take a seat.”
“Yes ma'am,” Carm nodded as you walked to the kitchen door and opened it.
“Your two o'clock is early,” You said, glancing back to Carm for a moment.. “Do you want to fit him in now?”
You nodded before turning back to Carm and gesturing to the kitchen. “She'll see you now, come through.”
You walked into the kitchen and smiled as you watched Carm walk in, the smile on his face as he spotted the makeshift beauty salon that had been set up.
“Take a seat,” Eva gestured to the seat across the counter, an adorably serious look on her face. You placed the baby into his high chair by the table, smiling as you heard Eva boss her uncle around.
“Hands in the bowl, keep them still.”
You went to the fridge, taking out a little light blue lunch box before glancing over to Carm with a smile.
“What color do you want?” Eva asked, pointing to the handful of nail polishes sitting on the counter.
“Hm, I'm not sure,” Carm mused, looking at the colors. “I got a big date tonight, I wanna look my best. What do you think will suit me?”
You smiled to yourself as you put the lunch box in the microwave, laughing softly as you heard Eva tell Carm to hold still.
After lunch and Carmy's nail appointment, you decided to take the kids to the park, feeling a new wave of love for your boyfriend that he made no attempt to remove the red nail polish. When you were taking the stroller to the lift, one of Carm's neighbors passed you in the hall and smiled at you and realized that it wouldn't be long before the baby in the stroller would be yours.
You brushed off the thought, trying to focus on just having a nice, fun day. As you were en route to the park, Carm asked if you could have a little detour, and you were sure the look on the kids faces when you arrived at build-a-bear would never leave you.
Carm took his nephew from the stroller and placed him on his hip before taking him to pick out a teddy, your heart swelling in your chest, moreso when Eva took your hand and asked you to help her choose.
You found yourself subconsciously placing your hand on your stomach, wondering what it would feel like to hold your own baby on your hip, feel their hand in yours, see the excitement in their eyes when they were presented with a cute little toy.
Carm's nephew had picked a bear (perhaps with a little nudge from his uncle), that ended up in a chefs uniform (that one was a total push), while Eva chose a bunny that she chose a performance outfit for.
When you got back to Carm's, you were more than happy to chill on the couch, though you practically melted into it when Carm got a book and read to the kids (and their new toys) til they were asleep.
“Not a bad effort,” You smiled, looking over to Carm and trying not to imagine the toddler that could be in his lap one day. “You might actually be pretty good at this whole uncle thing.”
“I might just be,” Carm grinned, reaching out to touch your hand. “Had help from the best though.”
“You're welcome,” You smiled, gently stroking his hand. “I presume that's why you're taking me on a..big date, was it?”
“Oh absolutely,” Carm nodded, looking serious for a moment before he grinned. “the biggest.”
“Hm, guess I'll have to get glammed up,” You smiled, looking over to Eva. “Maybe I'll see if I can get a last minute appointment.”
That evening, after a quick trip home to grab a change of clothes, you were back in Carmy's apartment. It felt so quiet without the kids, you found yourself putting on music just for background noise.
When you were in the bathroom putting on your makeup, you felt a wave of nausea hit you, more out of nerves than anything else. You hoped it would leave, but before you knew it you were bent over the toilet, taking a deep breath as you waited for the inevitable.
There was a knock on the bathroom door when you were washing your hands, looking up at the mirror taking a deep breath. Even with makeup you still looked unwell.
“Hey,” Carm smiled as you opened the door, the concern evident on his face. “Are you okay? I thought I heard..”
“I'm fine,” You nodded, taking a deep breath and letting out a sigh as the concern didn't leave his face. “I just..need to talk to you.”
You walked into the bedroom, sitting on the bed and trying to think of the right words.
“Okay,” You began. “this is..really not what I thought would happen, and I don't know how you're going to take this but..oh god..”
As you buried your head in your hands, Carm was immediately by your side, his arm around your waist.
“Whatever it is you can tell me,” He assured you. “I promise. Just let it out, we'll handle it.”
“I'm pregnant.” You said before you could stop yourself or build it up more, lowering your hands and looking over to Carm.
“You're..wow,” Carmy nodded, rubbing his jaw. “Well, thank fuck for that. I mean, I knew, but I thought you were dumping me.”
“Wait what?” You raised a brow. “You knew? How did you know?”
“I just knew,” Carm shrugged with a smile. “I mean, I guess I hoped I was right..I know it's skipping ahead a little but..I want what we had today, all the time.”
“Can you stop being so perfect for like one day?” You rolled your eyes with a grin, resting your head on Carmy's shoulder. “Or maybe just after the big date.”
#the bear#the bear 🐻#the bear fic#carmen berzatto x reader#carmy berzatto x reader#carmen berzatto x you#carmy berzatto x you#why do so many of my stories involve kids and or pregnancy#it's not intentional#just a vibe#🫶🏻🌼💗
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So I see HXH is in blue, so if I may, I request killua x chubby reader, where the reader is insecure of their chubby-ness and some ppl body shame them, if you don't want to do HXH can you do makoto naegi instead? I hope you have a amazing day/afternoon/night and good bye
Nobody other than your doctor should tell you to lose weight. But doctors have medical reasons, you are not made to appease everyone. As long as you are happy with yourself, you'll be fine.
-Killua, is kinda a a-hole, so he MIGHT have made a hurtful comment at first. It most likely wouldn't even have that much malice or bad intent behind it. Gon then would have told him to apologize since it was rude.
-Than again, Killua says a lot of things he doesn't really mean.
-Killua ends up actually becoming good friends with you if you push the comment aside.
-Once you start telling him how much those comments actually impact you, he'll start to feel really bad about his comment, saying he really didn't mean anything.
-"Um, I'm, sorry for what I said, and I know you already forgave me. But, uh... I don't want you to think I hate you and that your ugly. You're beautiful in your own way... I guess."
-He's just nervous and doesn't really know how to comfort someone.
-He could be walking down the street with you and someone could make a hurtful statement and he'd tell them they should say mean things like that to people they don't know.
-He's a bit of a hypocrite, but he does care for you.
#HXH#HXH x reader#HXH Killua#Hxh killua Zoldyck#Killua Zoldyck#Killua#Killua x reader#Killua zokdyck x reader#Killua Zoldyck x reader#HXH killua x reader#HXH killua zoldyck x reader#anime#x reader#request#gn reader#hxh#Cubby reader#Killua is kinda an asshole#it's not intentional
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#my memory is ass#It's not intentional#I'm not trying to be an asshole#I just can't remember shit#memes#humor#funny#lol#meirl#meme#depression#depression memes#anxiety#anxiety memes#PTSD#PTSD memes#trauma#trauma memes#relatable#relatable memes
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spending time with family is always a fun little test of how long it takes me to go from
'my family!!! i love these people i should spend time with them more often!!!!'
to
'my family are going to be the reason i decide to fake my death and assume a new identity far, far away so that i never have to speak to them again.'
#we're at four days folks#and for two hours today i felt like running off into the woods and just screaming#i love them i do#but sometimes they make feel Not Good#it's not intentional#they're good people#i mean maybe from my sister it's intentional idk#i'll be fine i'll just hole up in my room#calling a friend tonight to get some proverbial fresh air#nettle's thoughts
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another day, another oppurtunity to traumatize my swedish teacher
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me seeing a mutual's happy post: "hell yeah buddy :)" *hits like*
me seeing a mutual's sad/vent post: "aww no buddy :(" *hits like*
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My brain at all times:
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(after misunderstanding what someone said and embarrassing myself) oh great now they hate me and want to kill me with rocks
#realizing im awful at comprehending speech and intention from other people#am i autistic or just a bad person who knows
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Like you can Love again
you need to be loved in a way that shows you love is sacred, it is divine. you need to be loved so purely, so lightly, so you can learn to love. you need to be loved in the way oceans rise, but also fall. you need to be loved in the way wind rushes through leaves. you need to be loved gently, and patiently, and understanding. you need to be loved in a way that even if you cannot love, you will still be loved.
#uquiz#OOC.#About.#Awww <3#I'm doing a lot of romance post lately#It's not intentional#it just keeps coming up!
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why is religious Christmas imagery all so joyful and pleasant? where is the inherent horror of the birth of Christ? A mother is handed her newborn child, wailing and innocent. Her hands come away sticky. Red. Simply by giving her son life she has already killed him. He is doomed from the beginning. Her love will not save him from suffering. Because the thing cradled in her arms is not a baby, it is a sacrifice: born amongst the other bleating animals whose blood will one day be spilled in the name of what demands it. the night is silent with anticipation. Mary, did you know? That your womb was also a grave?
#instant conversation enders for my multiple youth pastor cousins#don’t say it (I’m gonna say it)#The Child is The Price#but i mean come on#as someone who isn't actually even christian the real-life historical version of this is still cursed as fuck#i mean we know that jesus was a person who existed. whatever circumstances he was born in#its terrifyingly ominous to imagine being so unaware of the affect your child will have on the future of humanity#time itself will one day be counted around your birth of him#and all because he will suffer an excruciatingly painful death that you will not be able to prevent#not only that. but regardless of his or your intentions#regardless of whether there is a god#for millenea unfathomable millions will have blood spilled and will spill blood in his name#atrocities will be committed that you cannot even conceive of#and all on his and your behalf#you love your child. its beautiful. but there's horror in what you've done. because everyone else will love him too#and what's more dangerous than that?
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does anyone have like an anti aesthetic. like something you look at and can recognize as a complete fashion/interior design/artistic movement and understand it but it makes you shudder seeing it. i am not talking like “its morally bad” “its poorly structured” like just sheerly devoid of joy for you actually invites a repulse response.
#also if it wasnt clear this isnt ‘its bad its lazy’ there is a level of like#completion consistancy i am thinking for with this#personally i really do not enjoy the like. vintage chic long red nails fur coats noir esque aesthetic HOWEVER 💥💥💥#i can recognize that it is put together it is Intentional#i feel like a lot of people are going to say minimalism on this so LET ME SAY 🫰☝️ i recognize that minimalism is Considered an aesthetic#but i *PERSONALLY* do not consider it an aesthetic i consider it the void of one#it is a lapse in aesthetic or personality in the same way a silence in a song is still technically a ‘beat’ but no music is played#however the importance of Space or Breath in design is more akin to a purposeful silence in music#because that silence matters in the same way rhythm and breath in design do#so i guess minimalism is more comparable to like. white noise. the sound of a fan#very little effort and there is a comfort in it i suppose but its not. A Design. okay#TO ME 🤫#if minimalism has one hater its me if minimalism has no haters im dead
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trans women are everywhere and are so eager to be seen and heard but only if they feel safe around you. if you hardly ever have trans women interacting with you, especially online, then consider there might be a reason for that and you should address it
#the same thing happens with black people#black people are everywhere! especially online! black gay and black trans people!#but when your community is suspiciously devoid of them then theres something wrong and you need to acknowledge it#even if its not intentional you need to think about how theres minority groups who do not feel safe around you at face value#this is why loud and outright support and solidarity is so important#black people and trans people and etc minority groups will assume you are unsafe unless you explicitly state otherwise#you can't just sit there and say 'well they didnt approach us so its not our fault for not including them!'#like did you TRY to get them to approach you??#cy texts
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i have such a love for characters who descend into madness or villainy out of deep, deep empathy. characters who fundamentally cannot cope with the cruel realities they find themselves in and blow up about it in spectacular fashion. fallen angel type characters with tears of outrage in their eyes. characters who break before they bend, and break so badly they splatter blood all over their noble ideals. every variation on it gets me so good
#getou suguru#kaneki ken#abyss twin#i know there are others who im not thinking of rn#feel free to reblog with more examples#aphelion.txt#tropes#WAIT I REMEMBERED MORE#jaina proudmoore#dimitri alexandre blaiddyd#phosphophyllite#i just spent like half an hour trying to find this on tv tropes but it must be. Too specific of a thing i have in mind bc#I just kept finding similar and related but too broad categories#despair event horizon. fallen hero. well intentioned extremist. etc etc etc#like specifically i'm talking about when the character's EMPATHY is the CRUX of the problem. sosooo crunchyjuicytasty#edit:#also just know that i am reading every tag on this post#and enthusiastically scribbling down the names i dont recognizr#so i can check out their series later#edit 2 wow this post blew up 🫡 godspeed fellow villain likers#the amount of people tagging this as 'me lmao' is concerning to me#wwx#how did i fucking forget this was also yllz era wwx
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Bruce gets accosted by reporters and one of them asks "Is it true that you're in competition with Superman to win Batman's affections?" and he is so taken aback bc what the fuck are they even talking about? There are a million questions going through his head such as, since when was superman into batman? since when was this public knowledge? wtf did bruce say to imply that he was into batman as well? And he doesn't have an answer to any of these questions so he just smiles and says, "No, I'm not. The word competition implies that Superman has a chance, which he does not."
why did he say that? Bruce doesn't know, it just felt like that's how Bruce Wayne would've responded bc what's more Brucie than fighting with Superman for Batman's heart? anyway, upon reflection, this was maybe not the best response in terms of long term consequences, but he's committed to the bit now.
a week after all this goes down, news reporter Clark Kent is caught saying that Batman deserves better than Bruce Wayne, so is a third suitor putting his hat in the ring to win over batman?
#superman was already iffy on bruce wayne#now he has a true hatred for the man for#1) declaring his intentions toward someone he has feelings for#2) not only implying that he is better boyfriend material than /Superman/#but that he’s so much better that superman isn’t even competition#/bruce wayne/#notable playboy and idiot#a better choice as a boyfriend#the absolute arrogance#batman#bruce wayne#superman#clark kent#superbat#dc#dc comics#mine
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seeing anyone praise biden right now after the horrors he saw and dismissed with his own eyes for so long is disgusting. the only reason he's speaking up is the US government would lose credibility with allies from this specific incident of aid workers dying - he certainly did not mind all the aid workers dying before...it has to be "close to home" enough to cause a PR crisis for the white house for any concern to be expressed by his administration. and "threats" are not action. has the money flow to israel stopped? has the consistent military support? he could completely denounce israel and it would mean nothing when he's still aiding the genocide
#so fucking ignorant to claim he has any good intentions or redeemed himself#but i've seen liberals use this to say he's not that bad#seriousposting
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my (very queer) friend is pregnant for the first time and she’s been on all the baby message boards (eg tiktok, facebook) and she found this tag that was like “ftm pregnancy” and she was like “oh cool! there’s whole tag for pregnant transmen!” and then was extremely confused as to why the tag was full of what appeared to be cisgender women. she was like “i mean i don’t wanna judge, maybe they are transmen but they don’t look how i expected them to, that’s okay, if they say they’re trans then they are” except she kept looking through the tag and literally NONE of them were transmen, ALL of them appeared to be ciswomen. she was VERY confused, seriously questioning what she knew about trans people (and not to be like “she has trans friends!” but literally her partner is trans, her sibling in law is trans, many of her friends are trans/nb, hell i think she’s a bit nonbinary herself, idk, we haven’t actually talked about that recently lol) and doubting reality in general.
and then she found out that, amongst a huge section of the internet to which she had never been exposed before, “ftm” stands for First Time Mom.
there’s no moral to this story i just thought it was funny
#she has a few other examples#of confusing ‘mommy group’ terms w terms commonly#used by the queer community#i don’t think it’s intentional like the mommy groups are trying to take the terms from us by force#i just think it’s funny
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