Annabeth, watching the news: Someone tried to fight a squid at the aquarium today!
Percy: *walks in covered with ink* Well, maybe the squid was being a dick.
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Based on an ACTUAL conversation I had with my crush.
Alex: Can I tell you something that’s driving me insane?
Magnus: Oh! Yeah, of course. You can tell my anything.
Alex: Thanks. So I like this guy and I haven’t like anyone in months, so it’s weird. He’s so dorky, and I flirt with him all the time, he even flirts back, but it’s like he doesn’t realize? He’s adorable, and probably one of my closest friends—though I really don’t tell him anything. He guesses everything like my gender correctly. I don’t know how he does it. It’s insane.
Magnus: That’s so… that’s so sweet, Alex. Can I ask who it is?
Alex: Magnus.
Magnus: What?
Alex: This is why I don’t tell you anything.
Magnus: Wait-wait is it because I asked who? I’m sorry.
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nah bc why did the grover/ ares conversation go like this
Grover: I'm a big fan
Ares: Name 5 of my wars that weren't mainstream
Grover: aight bet
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annabeth: why are you following me?
percy: because we’re dating now
annabeth: okay… what about grover?
percy: we’re a package deal
grover: buy one idiot, get one free
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Percy Jackson (texting Annabeth): sends a voice message
Annabeth Chase (texting back): I’m a little busy, is it urgent?
Percy Jackson: No, don’t worry, just listen later.
later
Annabeth Chase: presses play
Percy Jackson (voice message): THERE’S A FIRE-
Extra: (Grover screaming in the background)
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Luke: You can't force the gods to do anything
Percy "pay your freaking child support" Jackson: Bet
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percy: you're not getting the bolt
hades: bitch i just want my hat back
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percy: *cusses*
sally: “perseus jackson! you kiss your girlfriend with that mouth?”
*annabeth storms in and starts ranting to percy about something, and letting out the absolute most crude and violent cuss words known to man*
sally: 😳
percy: 🤭
paul: “i think she’ll be okay”
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Percy: why can’t we steal from the rich? We stole Jason from his camp?
Annabeth: we didn’t steal Jason, he’s free to do whatever he wants
Nico: we literally dragged him here?????
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Will, seeing the inside of Nico's cabin for the first time: It was nice of the Addams family to lend you their place for the weekend.
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Percy: Annabeth, I’m sad.
Annabeth: *Holds out arms for a hug* It’s going to be okay.
Will: Nico, I’m sad.
Nico, nodding: mood.
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Percy: I’ve picked out a very special song for our date tonight!
Percy: *starts playing ‘What is Love’*
Annabeth: What’s so special about this song?
Percy: One might say we heard it on our very first date.
Annabeth: First date? What date are you thinkin—OH MY FUCKING GODS PERSEUS JACKSON TELL ME YOU ARE NOT CONSIDERING THE TUNNEL OF LOVE TO BE OUR FIRST DATE
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