October 26, 2012 - Greater Noida, India Source: Virendra Singh Gosain/Hindustan Times via Getty Images

chat is this flirting am i being flirted with

The hearts don't mean he is in love with no one. The problem with English is how vague of the word love is in his meaning. It envolves different kinds of caring in one single word. But I'll try to express here what I mean.

He cares, as a person, about everyone. This is a basic level of love that he haves towards everybody. He doesn't want anyone to actually die, that's what I mean. He doesn't necesarily cares about someone, but he loves them enough to not want them to die.

He starts befriending someone and gets to know it. He starts liking things about them and disliking others. He starts loving this people in another way, we'll call it liking. This is more a get-to-know phase he doesn't always like. The less he knows, the less reasons to get attached get attached he has. I think this are the kind of love the hearts show in the image. He has to make sure to keep a balance between how much he loves and how much he let's himself be loved. He doesn't want to have misunderstandings. He is in constant fear of "what if I made them love me more and they care more?"

And then it comes the deeply care that love is in the non-romantic way. This care a (good) parent has for his babies. The love that makes people suffer emotionally in an absolute different way from what it could be a heartbreak or a misunderstanding between friends. If something happens to the loved one, the pain is unbearable. It's one of the worst things rhat can happen. And Chilchuck knows this, he is father of three daughters, and his wife left him. She left, he knows the pain it is to come home and find it empty when there should be someone. He knows the guilt it comes with failing those loved ones. The shame. He doesn't like being this vulnerable. This love makes him suffer like no other does. So he is very very carefull of how much he allows himself to care about someone so he won't get to love like this.

He draws a line between work and private life because his private life envolves love and deep care, and he doesn't want to love nor care like this for people who's job is to constantly risk their lifes. He doesn't want to feel the anguish, he doesn't want to feel the loneliness it will come after the unenviable separation of the party.

He tries his best to not get attached to people. To not let people get attached to him. But he fails. He fails and falls downstairs with a whole drum set.

He can't help but to care about this people. He can't help but to love this people he's been living with the past few weeks in the risking of their lifes. He tells himself he's doing this for money and that he doesn't care, but he does.

Those hearts don't mean anything other than him caring about them. He cares about Senshi. He cares about Marcille. He cares about Laios. About Itsuzumi. About Namari. He cares in a way that hurts. He loves this people. He doesn't want to even imagine a world in where they are gone, or suffering, or in problems. They're his friends, they're something he, unwillingly, accepts as family.

He cares about Falin and Mickbell because he doesn't want them dead. He doesn't feel any anguish toward if they do or not get hurt after they're out of his sight. Sure, he cares, but he can live without thinking about them the rest of his days. It doesn't happen like that with Laios. He can't just simply let Laios go and follow Fallin just after he recover consciousness from a punch in the gut. Was it Mickbell, he would let him if he really didn't wanted. But Laios didn't wanted to sit and wait, and he had to care. He had to verbalize to himself that he cared. He had to let them know, so they would act accordingly. So they won't get themselves killed like idiots.

He doesn't want others to fall in romantic love with him. He doesn't feel romantic love towards anyone either. He isn't the man for this kind of love. He is, in fact, afraid of it. He doesn't want to fall in love, because he's still in love with his wife. She left him because he was negligent. But since when has this become the definitive stop for love? Chilchuck knows his wife is angry at him, and she has all the reason to be so! His husband, the one she loved and cared for, gets himself in dangerous situations, treats his body poorly and almost never is home. She loves him, and it hurts her to love like this, so she leaves. Like this she won't have to look at him get himself mistreated like he does. She would have the pull in her's stomach that tells her that he could be in great danger, that she could become a widow, but she tries to calm it with his daughter's mail to him. He could never. He can't imagine a world in wich they cease to exist. A world without his wife, even if she distanced herself, without his daughters, would be a world worthless of living. He knows this. Because he cares and he loves in such a deep level that he is scared of loving anyone else like this. To become so vulnerable to emotion. This vulnerable to something bad happening.

The fact that he is so afraid of loosing his wife, even after she left him, says a lot. He still cares about her. He is still in love with her. He wants to go back to what it was before, but he can't and he know its his fault. And he respects his wife's distance because he loves her. Now, he doesn't love her in the movie way, he isnt in love like a teenager would to his first girlfriend, he doesn't want to kiss her, or hug her, or be by her side at all moments of the day. He loves her. He cares about her deeply, deeply enough that he doesn't need to be by her side to care, to love. He also respects her. He can survive without her because he knows she's better with his daughter. For sure he wants to hug, kiss and be by the side of this person he loves, it would be ideal, but he can survive without thinking about it too much. It's just like with his daughters. They're all adults that now live far from him. And he is ok with it now. He sends mail and recieves mail, and even if he misses greatly, he can manage not to think about it. Because he knows she is allright. Because he knows he fucked up. He doesn't know where he fuked up, but for his wife to leave him, at least he knows he did. They never talked about it, because they both seem to have a problem in expressing themselves. She fell into a bad mood and then she disappeared. The amount of pain he must have felt it's... let's say it's quite big.

He keeps his guard up. He doesn't want to love deeply anyone. He doesn't want to feel the emptiness, the hurt, that comes after someone so dear leaves. He knows for a fact he'll be leaving this people. He knows that they could die. If he loves, it will hurt in a way nothing else hurts. He will miss. He doesn't like missing people he cares like this. This is why he doesn't want to love. This is why he doesn't want to be loved. This is why those hearts that are almost full are his main source of concern. This is why he makes the effort to keep this feelings at bay, to love only in the friendly way and with extreme caution.

But he can't controll his own love. And he ends up caring more and more about these people. He slowly makes him a part of the dangerous love zone that family means. He is afraid to confuse someone about his feelings towards them, so he still tries to maintain distance with his abusive remarks, but this only works so far. He loves and is loved. And because of this he will suffer.

I... I extended myself a bit I see...

making a collection

making another collection with a threatening aura

One thing about Idolish7 is that there is SO much love between the characters and it's not romance baiting, just deep sincerity

I love getting asked why I need a cane when I'm grocery shopping it's my favorite activity when I'm just trying to run errands

is there anything worse than being rejected by a potential friend 😐

todayyyy in class the guy i hate asked a stupid fucking question and antonio elbowed me to get me to notice he was saying something fucking stupid again (i noticed) and he said. i don’t know why you hate him so much. you two are exactly the same. and i said. what are you talking about. and he said. you look the same. and i was like. because we’re both asian? that’s racist. and he started laughing, then got a hold over himself, and was like. that’s not even what i mean--you dress the same. and i looked at him and he was wearing shorts and a sweater and a scarf and i said. i do not dress like that. (i was wearing trousers, patent leather shoes, a turtleneck, a massive wool coat...) he said. you’re both so pretentious. i said what do you MEAN. 

uuuu. havent seen conscience of the king in a long time but i remember the episode being very good overall. but kirk hitting on a 19 year old is creepy as fuck right. like. thats not just me, right.

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Scorching hot relationship take but I don't believe in "emotional affairs". 80% of the time it's someone bitching about their partner having close, intimate friendships. It's weird and toxic to expect yourself to be the only close relationship your partner has. And even if your partner DOES fall for someone else, that's not always cause to end the current relationship. People don't magically stop experiencing attraction to others when they enter a relationship, that's not at all how human emotions and biology works. Your jealous feelings are valid but as long as they choose to stay with you and don't act on their feelings, they're not doing anything wrong. You can't punish your partner for thoughtcrime.

had a crazy fucked up dream about 3 of my ex/coworkers we'll call them by their initials (D, Y & B) where we plan this whole bank robbery and it was all going to plan until something went wrong when we actually robbed the bank and we had to split up. we agreed to meet at the getaway car but when me & D got there we couldn't find the other two anywhere... so we had to go back and try to find them. we eventually did find Y&B in a tiny closet and it was clear we were interrupting.. something.... B got really really mad at me specifically saying its not what you think.. and he like lunged forward as if he were going to strangle me but just before his hands reached my throat, in a puff of smoke he turned into a bunch of snakes and slithered off. and Y was just like "oh rip..." then we make it back to my car and I'm driving us up this like mountain with the sea on one side. we go around a sharp turn, there's something slick on the road and I lose control of the car. I run off the road into the guard rails. the car is precariously balanced on the edge so we're like holy shit we almost died. we robbed a bank and almost died and here we are. and we are laughing/ relieved until it gets real quiet and I look down and see that I got impaled by the steering wheel. we sit in silence for a moment and then D got out of the car and said well.. good luck with that......... and Y was like im sorry allie and got out too and that was enough to shift the balance and the car went over the cliff and I woke up before I hit the water :(

Huh

coming to realize I am actually physically incapable of talking to another queer person without flirting a little bit even when I don't mean to any other autistic aroaces relate? yes you do. reblog.

at the end of the day im still down bad for a straight dude 💔

no but like. WHAT CHANGED. literally can't wrap my head around this.