Tumgik
#if this flops i stg
killxio · 1 year
Note
Eren x caribbean gf headcanons 🙏
wanderlust | e. yaeger
word count: 1,440 [5 min 13 sec read] | ✪ content warnings: facesitting, six nine, handjob, eren using y/n like a face mask, he’s a munch in this (all hail the munches)
eren x reader / eren x black!reader / eren x carribean!reader
✭ drabbles of eren and his pretty beach bound girl. ( ps, sorry for taking so long anon. side note, everyone and their mama is jamaican, so the reader in this is not jamaican. trinidad and tobago i’m side eyeing you too. sorry not sorry, we need representation for other islands. )
Tumblr media Tumblr media
eren absolutely gets himself into trouble just to hear you yell at him. he thinks it’s so fucking sexy, especially when you notice his hard-on and yell more.
the way your accent tends to come out when you’re angry just goes straight to his dick, mans can’t help it.
“woooii- ya make mi blood clot, eren! round with ya friends, can’t give nuh call or send mi text den tiptoe in the damn house like a ninja. ya can’t answer when me fa call ya name?”
he’s between your legs and you’re scolding him, finger pushing his big ass head around. he’s been out for a few hours later then he said he would, then came and snuck up behind you in the bathroom as you’re doing your hair.
yet all he can do after he’s put you on the counter is smirk down at you. he grabs you finger, guiding it down his chest and silences your complaints with a kiss.
it’s when he leads your hands low enough that you break it.
“jesus eren. you’re fucking nasty,” you shame, your american tongue coming back.
“no keep yelling,”
“ya fa be ‘shamed a-yaself.” you scold, trying to hide your smirk, brushing your fingers over his buldge.
eren takes u to the most luxurious parts of your home possible, he knows how much you love your families native country.
in college, he works his ass off to take you home atleast twice a year at fancy resorts or luxurious airbnbs.
as he gets older and more successful, the trips get better and more frequent.
your 10 year anniversary gift? him buying you a home at home.
eren finds the way you eat fruit with no fork adorable. he loves your brown doe eyes staring up at him accompanied by your sticky mouth.
“what?” you question, looking up at eren from your beach chair, mango in hand.
“nothing baby,” he smiles, bending down to grab a wet-wipe from your picnic blanket, “you just devour fruit like a bulldozer.”
“do not.” you protest, and despite him wiping your hands down his gaze is still set straight on you. there’s a slight breeze passing by, and his green eyes peer at you though his waving hair.
“stop looking at me like i’m that mango.”
“am not!” you protest again as he moved onto wiping your mouth and cheeks, knowing damn well you’re about to jump his bones in the hotel room later.
he loves your mango, grapefruit and pineapple fed pussy, he swears it makes you taste sweeter. before you, eren never came home craving his girl’s pussy like a meal. but yours? you have to claw him off you.
this time, eren’s taken you to jamaica, one of the carribean islands you actually haven’t been to yet. he pulls the rented jeep into the drive way of your two’s airbnb, coming home to feed you the breakfast you sent him to the market for.
“hi ren baby. did you get it?” your brown eyes and coily hair peek up at him from your book from your place on the couch when he turns the corner into the living room.
“mhm.” he nods simply, holding up the brown paper bag in his hand to show you.
but he’s craving a different meal.
“ohhh good! the utensils and plates here are so so cute, i think the host even left wine. is it too early to day drin- baby?” you question, distracted at the way he pulls at your hips and cuts you off with an absolutely nasty kiss.
“i need to be fed too,” eren says, briefly breaking the kiss, his hands sneaking into your tiny panties and toying with your clit. you know he isn’t talking about his own meal in the bag.
two of his fingers slide up and down your hole, collecting your slick, then slowly penetrates your tight ring.
“mmmm,” you let out a cat-like purr as his fingers slide deeper into you, moving up and down, riding, and he knows the perfect balance of thrusting to please you.
he’s swallowing all of your pretty moans, tasting the chapstick off your lips as he’s attacking at your lips, then your jaw. your neck. your collarbones. until he’s laid you down and pulling your cropped cami top up to get at the valley between your breasts.
he’s humming out appreciatively against your skin, tasting the soft reminants of your shea butter from a shower the night before. he travels, just a little, but cruelly ignores your hard nipples pointing up for him. he disconnects from your breasts with a squelch, sitting back up to pull off your panties and lay down beneath you.
“what’s gotten into you, rennie?” you ask, a little breathless between movements.
“nothing sweetheart. now sit,” he demands, pulling you up onto his chest.
“wait. let me touch you?” he doesn’t object and you go straight for it, sliding down his sweats and eagerly pulling out his coated dick. there’s two beads of pre still going down his shaft when you lean down to lick and start to suck on him, he slaps your ass.
“i’m eating. if you’re going to touch and distract me, hands only.”
and you do. scooting back more so your cunt hovers over his face, wrapping your fist around his cock. he pulls you down and begins licking at your cunt.
eren shakes his head lightly, pressing his tongue into you and passing over your clit a few times so deliciously, the downright nasty sounds of him slurping at your cunt making you clench around nothing. while his tongue travels back up to your leaking hole, he closes his lips around your cunt too, sucking.
“s-so good baby,” you praise, then get caught off guard by him prodding his tongue at your entrance and penetrating you.
and eren’s tounge is thick. not absolutely abnormal, but definitely matches his 6’4 height.
the repeated feeling of his muscle penetrating you sends you spiraling, tightening your grip around his shaft trying to ground yourself. with every in and out motion, more of your slick is pushed out and down his throat.
eren is addicted to feeling you come on his tongue instead of his dick, something about you creaming on his face? does it for him.
you’d think it’d be the way your hands swivel around his shaft that’d send him spurting sticky while liquid up around your hands but instead, it’s the way your hips jerk in their up and down motion while you cum, your ass jiggling on his face.
“ima.. ima cum eren.. i’m cummin’” hence the stuttering of your hips and your breathy, choked out moans. he wraps his arms around your thighs, burying his face further into your cunt.
“yeah princess?” he asks rhetorically, softly slapping at and jiggling your thighs, “do it baby. keep cumming on my face.”
“hah- fuckkk rennn..” you’re mewling, riding out your orgasm on your mans unfaltering tongue, drinking in the vibration of his words against your cunt.
“you’re such a sweet girl. my sweet girl.” he says, gazing up at you as you’ve now scooted down and are sitting on his chest. he doesn’t protest at way you leak down his abs.
“am i?” you return a dopey smile, flopping over ontop of him.
one of his arms wrap around you waist, rubbing soothingly at your bare ass while the other softly rubs at your scalp.
he doesn’t reply, instead you’re left to listen to the beat of his heart and rise and fall of his chest as you two share radiated body heat. you’re close enough to the ocean to hear the waves in the distance.
“.. okay, now can we eat?” you ask, breaking the silence, gazing at the forgotten food on the side table.
eren loves traveling with you, you grabbing him by the hand and leading the way. he’ll follow you anywhere.
“it’s a type of spanish lime but TECHNICALLY, but it’s more like a grape. it’s called kenip.” you inform him, tapping his shoulder indicating he could put you down now.
he puts you back down on the sand, having previously had you on his shoulder so you could pick the fruit from a tree growing on the beach.
he just stares up at you with the biggest eyes of admiration as you peel and hand feed him a handful.
“you like it?”
“yeah. i like you.”
“the stupid limes that are actually grapes, big head.”
“those too.”
he does like you. he loves you. his little caribbean girlfriend who’s smile glows the brightest when she’s taken to the beach. who cries in disdain when he gets fruit from the supermarket and not the farmers market. who’s vibrant dark skin, which he’s in awe by, enhances in the summer.
he loves you.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
480 notes · View notes
cirrusea · 8 months
Text
Tumblr media
When the bestie gets carried away with killing zombies
613 notes · View notes
secretsunderskin · 2 months
Text
Tumblr media
fuck it, a special treat for the ass lovers, the bunny breeders, and the feet freaks.
✨happy slutty sunday✨
91 notes · View notes
Text
watched the social network again and just thinking ab that part where they’re in the dorm and eduardo grabs two beers from the fridge bc he’s going to give one to mark only to turn around to mark grabbing his own bottle bc mark only ever thinks of himself so why would he expect anyone else to think of anyone but themselves and eduardo is just this lil sad guy standing there w two beers while his bestie literally doesn’t see him or anything he does for him
130 notes · View notes
babymagi · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media
SHE'S DONE
TOOK LIKE THREE DAYS BUT SHE'S DONE
THE EMPRESS HERSELF
THE LOVE OF MY LIFE AND ONE OF THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMEN IN ANIME
REN KOUGYOKU
62 notes · View notes
renarots · 6 months
Text
Guys not to alarm you but fnaf comes out tomorrow and I will be making it my whole personality
7 notes · View notes
miiroren · 2 years
Text
tumblr bylers i’m gonna need y’all to go give my byler drawing some love on instagram bc she’s flopping HARD
54 notes · View notes
gaylittleguys · 10 months
Text
let me do intestine practical effects!!!! let me at it!!!!! you all keep forgetting the mesentery!!!!!!
3 notes · View notes
wingsofahoneybee · 1 year
Text
i'm too sexy and powerful (autistic and won't shut the fuck up) so every once in a while god likes to humble me (a stupid shitpost i forgot about blows up out of nowhere)
3 notes · View notes
moefongo · 1 year
Text
I want to write a fic where both my builders whom are coincidentally called Beans (Portia & Sandrock) meet up in Sandrock and chaos ensues
I think i will but after i finish New Beginnings
4 notes · View notes
thatone-churro · 2 years
Text
just lost a huge-ass roach under my nightstand and it’s 3 am so guess who’s not gonna sleep tonight lol
8 notes · View notes
lecter-lioncourt · 2 years
Text
I rlly wish I recorded my reaction to Bloodywood's first album Rakshak, bc when I realised that their singles that they'd released before the album came out had updated, refined album versions, I absolutely LOST MY SHIT. I swear to God I haven't reacted that viscerally to an album drop since Born This Way in 2011
8 notes · View notes
Text
Contradash is like an unproblematic Machine Gun Kelly I think
0 notes
thatdeadaquarius · 1 year
Note
I have so many ideas but none of them can be put into words, all I can do is just wheeze as they come along🤣
Also remember how wordy and flowery Teyvat speech/dialogue is? ADD THAT TO THE FACT THAT TEYVAT HAS ITS OWN LANGUAGE---
Reader can understand the basic speech which is why they are so blunt (I love this idea so much 🤣) and can piece together an idea what the person is talking about.
*insert random person talking about a commission with a long ass backstory*
Traveller & Co.: *understands completely and making plans to retrieve said commission*
C!Reader: (They said they had a cart.... a bunch of hilichurls appeared... dancing?.... they want us to dance fight the hilichurls???? Dance off???)
Actual story->The person's cart got ambushed by a group of hilichurls and taunted them by dancing around it.
....... it doesnt always translate well
Also imagine Reader heaeing random names and overthinks it as a word instead of a name.
Example: Pantalone means pants in Philippine English (sorry not sorry Pantalone)
Tsaritsa??? Oh do they speak russian there??? - reader
Capitano -> captain in some countries
(I once mistake Sandrone as Sandalone and I just went "... ehh??? Standalone? Sandalone as in Sand Alone???? Sandal (Flip flops)????
Oh wait its Sandrone" ".... as in Sand and Drone??--)
-Vine Boom
VINE BOOM ANON MY BELOVED 💖❤🧡💛💚💙💜✨️✨️
Gif is me writing u anything ever:
Tumblr media
AHFLALA FERRRALLL I STG I ALSO THOUGHT ABT THIS!! WHY U COULD ALSO BE BLUNT BC U ONLY GOT THE BASICS 💀 RIP
Man theyre written language looks so scary to learn, kinda like when I looked into trying to learn Mandarin/Japanese (and even Korean), the letters r just inherently so different i was so intimidated
And u dont even read it like left -> right like English
Omg i tried to reply to a arabic comment on my art post once, and i felt so acommplished when i finally was able to type "اشكرك (thanks)" but like, i had to put it on the OTHER SIDE OF THE TEXT BOX, LIKE ALIGN IT TO THE RIGHT INSTEAD OF HOW U KNOW ENGLISH IS INHERENTLY ALIGNED LEFT, IT WAS SO TRIPPY-
Going thru genshin life only understanding minimal words of anything anyone says is honestly how i feel like ive been playing Genshin LMAO
Those analysis videos/lore are saving a bitch's life out here
PANTALONE IS ALSO RLLY CLOSE TO SPANISH FOR PANTS I KNOW WHAT U MEANNN LOL
UR ENDLESS CONFUSION FOR SANDRONE PLEASE ANON U DIDNT EVEN GET IT RIGHT THE FIRST CORRECTION IT JUST KEPT GETTING WORSEEE 😂😭 SAME THO
That would literally be you in genshin tho, like i could easily see it being like, back to back misunderstandings 😭😭
Like u think u got it right (Oh so his name is Rex Lapis, wait what? Morax? Ok his name is Morax...?? What??? Zhongli??? WHO IS THIS MAN-)
.
JFC first they gotta have a whole different language (like u saw in game)
And ON TOP OF THAT THEY CAN TALK FOR 10 MIN STRAIGHT ABT THE WEATHER OR SOME SHIT??
No... just, no.
U quickly decide u like what little bits of language u could pick up so far, which just results in,
U guessed it, simple speech and short fragmented sentences (or broken Teyvatian)
U cant even bring urself to care when u give half the characters a heart attack and send the rest into laughing fits
No fucks given, they wanna make this extra hard on u by being wordy on top of a new language,
Yeah u dont care what comes out of ur mouth anymore
Also, since everybody is raised in Teyvat very few ppl dont know the language, which once again brings us back to ancient/older deities/creatures who have a more simplistic version/outdated version of modern language
.
Omg getting stuff mistranslated bc u cant understand it all/only keywords sounds like hell but also rlly funny
Traveler/Paimon: "Alright, yes, all is well. We will accept this comission, and depart soon."
You: "...they want us to?? Dance fight?? Hilichurls...???"
Traveler just stares at u half in pity, half trying to hide their amused smile, Paimon is giggling
The commissioner is shook bc a supposed ancient creature?? Just accepted?? Their simple commission?? And u think they want u to dance battle???
.
PLEASE U MISTRANSLATE THE HARBINGERS NAMES RIGHT TO THEIR FACES
Signora: "You shall rue the day you crossed the Fatui mortals!"
You: "Lady we don't care, just fight us."
(Signora just means 'Lady')
Signora: *offended gasp*
Traveler/Paimon trying to stifle laughter
Raiden Shogun jaw dropped a little
.
Pantalone: "What a pleasure to finally meet you traveler, and thine wonderful companions!" *little bastard smile*
You: "And it was awful to meet you, Pants."
Pantalone: 😶😧😡 "Pants?! HOW DARE YOU NOT EVEN GIVE ME THE MOST BASE RESPECT, AFTER I GREETED THEE SO KINDLY-"
.
Oh its so funny, everytime you talk about Childe you always phrase it like he's an actual child bc u thought everyone was just calling him a little kid for some reason (u dont know how Teyvat ages work, he could be for all you know!)
Not very long, but Vine Boom anon your brain >>>>
Ur ideas r so on point, i love them sm
That makes perfect sense why u could be talking blunt too, like an in world explanation really
For you, all the desserts🥰 🤲🍪🍨🍰🍮🧋🍦🍡
Cheers,
🌒🌊🌧Aquarius♒️🌌🌘
406 notes · View notes
Text
okay but the Naruto universe is so fucking weird yet funny if you explain it and question it.
first, you have this lil orphan broke kid ninja boy named after a fishroll. then, you have an emo kid who acts like he got parents and a good way in life despite the fact he’s equally as much of an orphan as Mr. Broke-Blonde-Bitch. THEN you have this normal chick with pink hair who signed up for absolutely none of this nonsense yet got dragged into it. tell me why it’s these three against the world yet none of them can function together? it’s like watching ferrets hyped up on PCP fight over raw spaghetti noodles. dont even get me started when they were in school together, i can bet every person here 6 cents that at some point Sakura aka Ms. Fuckall got tired of Naruto and Sasuke’s bullshit and just tried to abandon them at an animal shelter.
speaking of school and general tomfoolery, why was the dude in charge of these three young squishy brained freaks the most depressed 20 something year old creature on the planet? i will admit, Kakashi is attractive and a great dude. he is so iconic, he misses his old team, and it’s clear he wanted best for his Group of Weird Children but he also reads porn all day and his mask probs smells like cheap aftershave.
if i was a 13 year old ninja child and i saw my sensai (who’s name sounds like cashew) doing all that i’d assume im either about to learn a sick ass skill (how to not cope with emotional trauma properly) or im about to get my ass handed to me. or im about to dropout.
back on track. so you’ve got orphan #1, orphan #2, Ms. Get-Me-Out-Of-Here, and Emotionally Repressed Man in one team. what do the kids do? beef for like 3048384 episodes. what does Kakashi do? try to teach them the power of friendship the entire damn series. oh, and let’s not forget that Naruto apparently has a demon fox inside him because of course he does.
anyways, once the team gets good at teaming they haul off to take their lil ninja exams. who do they meet? some kid named Gaara with smudged eyeliner and shaved brows. he’s a red-head, that’s cute. oh and he can control sand and tries to kill every child in the exams because his dad is a piece of shit hipster. who else do they meet? a kid named Rock Lee who can kick really hard, a girl named Tenten who wishes for all of us to stfu, and poor Neji who can’t keep doing this. there’s also some guy named Guy. yeah, the chunin exams nearly flop because Gaara doesn’t know how to act right.
all this is happening but the pivotal of it all? Sasuke decides to be extra emo and FUCKS OFF TO KILL HIS HALF BLIND SICKLY OLDER TWINK BROTHER.
then, Naruto decides he wants to harness his powers and FUCKS OFF WITH AN OLD ASS BUSHY HAIRED MAN WHO WRITES PORN. Jiraiya needs to be studied on a microscopic spiritual level. he is why SCP’s exist.
who let these kids out? i told you all not to feed the animals and look what happened. now theres beef between a group of kids and the akatsuki.
oh and the akatsuki?? don’t get me started. wtf is that. why is this group of fucked up people with weird powers who are being led by a ginger hive mind of corpses just wandering around? and why is Weasel, aka Itachi, in the middle of it with his goofy explosive hypnotic eyeballs? i want them all put down.
so you’ve got the evil eldirch horrors in the streets. thats fine. Naruto gets put into a new gang cuz Kakashi has to hospitalized. cool, whatever. Naruto decides to start hutning down his rogue boyfriend alongside Sakura, who became a sickass ninja doctor, along with his new sensei Yamato. wonderful… THEN SOME BITCH NAMED SAI SHOWS UP.
DO NOT GET ME STARTED.
what is that? why is it emo? why is its tongue tattooed? put it back outside bro i stg. i love him so much.
everything is just everywhere in this anime bro I can’t. Sasuke is no where to be seen, Naruto is doing fuckall across the world with his groupie, Kakashi is lowkey sad again cuz his kids are gone, and Sakura can barely breathe without issues occurring.
not just that but the twink brother named Weasel is being stupid and enables his own murder. yeah he basically wants Sasuke to come for his ass. meanwhile, Naruto comes home bigger, better, older but still broke and full of fox demon. still, not a single soul except his friends and teachers like him. shit gets even more wild, it becomes knock-off Cheetah Girls vs. The World.
girl i gotta go before i hurt someone. see yall in part 2.
(all of this is heavily unedited, apologies for mistakes)
38 notes · View notes
sweeneydino · 4 months
Note
I think so far, everyone has given all the possible ideas for Spikelangelo au, so do you have a new au idea, or are you planning to go back to Frida or see how things will go
Lol, no, the ideas keep coming.
I change interests for au ideas a lot. Right now, I'm fixated on Spikeangelo and Little Dragons but tmr I might be drawing TSHL or smth.
Idk, I just flip-flop to what I'm interested in atm. Adhd stg
Frida, I've got a few drawings of her, but I'm never happy with how it turns out to post them.
Guess we will see where it goes hredvnj
17 notes · View notes