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deceitfuldevout · 4 months

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A Woman Like You

Tommy Shelby x WOC!Reader

Word Count: +1,215

Warning(s): Angst, Sexist remarks, Societal pressure, Sterotypes.

Author's note(s): I've recently been using writing as a form of therapy. This goes to all the ladies that can relate.

You've fallen head over heels for Tommy Shelby, but now you're questioning if his intentions were sincere or not.

GIF by nofckingfighting

You made the mistake of falling in love. You should've seen the signs sooner. You started working at the Garrison as a bar maid with Grace, eventually moving up to being their sole entertainment. You were an exotic bird who had caught to wandering eyes of drunken Englishmen. Some folks would say you had these men in a trance, with your rare features and seductive mannerisms. Some even say you're a witch. But there was only one person who saw you for you. Tommy Shelby.

It was refreshing, being seen as a soft, delicate thing. His demeanor would shift when talking to you. He's much kinder to you that with any of his men. That was until another, prettier face had caught his eye. You of all people knew the truth: Tommy Shelby would never love you. Instead he'd fallen for your coworker Grace. She's everything you weren't. That may have been the reason why. Of course, you should've seen the signs. How he'd look at her with such tenderness.

Eventually his entire personality completely changed with you. Perhaps they were his true colors. After her death, things went south. Tommy returned to you, but only for physical intimacy. He was rough, unapologetic, and at time, downright cruel. He hadn't spoke to you like a lady, with basic respect. It almost hurt knowing men will never speak to you with kind remarks. As soon as you found a better option, you let him know right away. When you close the pub for the last time, Tommy was there. It was strange, having an Englishman waste his previous time on foreign blood.

You turn around to find Tommy sitting on a barstool, not paying him mind. Then something strange happened. He isn't usually this tender, not even in private. So why on earth was he telling you to stay? After every humiliating thing he'd put you through. How Tommy would shimmy you off his arm in front of his business associates. It only got worse when he'd flirt with women right in front of you, then ask for a fuck because it was convenient. Perhaps it was the liquid courage, maybe even the hormones that made you tear up with anger. But for some reason, you wanted to let him know he hurt you, "Enough, Tom, you need to stop doing this,"

He tilts his head up, genuinely surprised that you'd spoken up. His eyelids are hooded, "If you've got something to say..." he lights up a cigarette, "...say it now," how predictable. Tommy's cruelty had no limits. You were tired of being his little plaything, "I deserve better than this, better than you," letting him know how you truly felt, "You're fucking selfish, you know that?" tears already streaming down both cheeks, "You could've told me you were seeing other women, Tom," your vision blurs. Tommy objected, "You knew who I was when you met me--"

"Yeah, yeah I thought I did, until you decided to to make an acceptation with that blonde whore!" you knew what it would take to get his blood boiling. You wanted to hurt him the same way he hurt you, "I've wasted most of my life waiting for you to love me back, I wasted my good years on a man who wouldn't care if I bled out on the floor!" voice now shaking. You were filled with regret, pain, and anger.

He doesn't even know what the weight of his words did to you, "I know how you English men see women like us, we're always sexually desired but never loved, enough for a good fuck but not enough to make a wife," a chuckle escapes your tips at the thought of it. How could he marry someone like you? His name and status that he's worked so hard for would be tainted. Because who could ever love a woman like you? He had the audacity to roll his eyes, "You were entertainment, to bring customers in," someone pretty enough to keep company around.

"Everything, Tom, everything I've been doing, the act, because I am not allowed the luxury of being seen as innocent," after pouring your heart out, he still hadn't believed you, "Don't act like you haven't been seeing other men," he scoffs. You started to laugh at that remark. Had he really been that clueless? Tears stream down both cheeks. You wipe at them, smearing your mascara, "Now that's incredible," a deep grunt is trapped in the back of your throat, "You really think I'm a whore, don't you?" in an almost hushed tone, "Tommy, you were my first and only, do you really not believe me?" nothing felt worse than being betrayed by the one you trust the most, "All I ever wanted was for you to love me," since the beginning you were there. Even when he was mourning Grace you were there to keep him comfort. How foolish of you.

"Now you never told me--"

"I know who you pretend I am, who you want me to be," you roll your eyes, sniffling for a moment, "I'm not like you Tom, I can't pass, I can't change the color of my skin or features-- I will never be the white woman you've always wanted me to be, the kind of woman you'd keep on your arm without feeling embarrassed, why can't you just accept that?" a faint pause, "You told me...you told me she wasn't your type," barely a whisper, "Was everything a lie?" when he doesn't say anything, it was the only answer you needed. At that moment you snapped, "Please! Look at me!" you smack his arm, "Tommy!" when he does you're given only a cold stare.

Of course, it was never going to be someone like you. There are tears brimming your eyes again. It hurts, knowing that you will always be second best. Always an option but never the first, "At first I was confused, your infatuation with Grace didn't make sense, and now I see that it never mattered who she was," your breath hitches for a moment, "You were always going to choose someone like her..." now rambling about the obvious, "Prettier, blonder...whiter," you taunt.

Each word felt like venom on your tongue. You should've been used to the poison by now, "You don't know how long it took for me to trust a man again, after the pain I've been through--women like me, Tom, we don't have pretty blue eyes that get us what we want, not without a price," that remark made your skin crawl, "Always the seductress, never seen as pure," a dark chuckle erupts, taking up all sound from the bar. Tommy only stares back at you, with that same cold expression. You lean against the counter, looking down at the wood before returning to glance at him, "Did you ever love me?"

If there's one thing about Tommy, is that he would never lie to you, "No," a short, simple answer. You give him a soft, faint smile. Saddened by the loss but also relieved that you were free at last, "Thank you," with that you left, never returning to the Garrison again.

#tommy shelby #tommy shelby x reader #reader insert #tommy shelby x you #woc!reader #peaky blinders #cillian murphy #reader #fem!reader #peaky blinder fanfic #thomas shelby #peaky blinder imagine #peaky blinders x reader

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lazytitans-world · 3 months

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My pitch/outline for a Wish series

I wanted there to be a way for the abandoned concepts of Wish, such as Starboy and evil Amaya, to be utilized without re writing Wish out of respect to the team behind it. And so I thought, why not make a series that starts after Wish ends and uses those concepts in ways that stays true to the movie while the show can be its own thing.

Keep it mind these are just basic outlines of what the major stories are plus ideas for some fun filler episodes

Season 1: The main storyline of season one is a force of dark magic has appeared in Rosas and Asha must venture into the magic mirror to speak and possibly free Magnifico as he has the most knowledge of dark magic. Asha's journey into the mirror world would entail as a kind of therapy session for Magnifico as Asha and the audience learn more about Magnifico's past. Ultimately Magnifico would end up free from his mirror but would utlimately choose evil over good and in doing so harms Star with more powerful dark magic. Star is in critical condition and as Asha is caring for the star another ball of light makes it way outside of the building where Asha is caring for star. When Asha steps out to see what could have caused this, she is shocked to see a human-like boy her age standing right in front of her that is made of the same magic as star is made out of.

Season 2: This season will focus on building the relationship between Starboy and Asha. I do not want to go into detail on Starboy's character just yet but his relationship with Asha be a smaller enemy to lovers type story as he is weary of Asha's skill as a magic wielder and as a protector of Star. We would see their relationship grow as they try to help star recover from Magnifico's attack,, Starboy helping Asha master the wand given to her, and as they also deal with Amaya being corrupted by the dark magic let loose by Magnifico.

Amaya's turn would be a slow burn, as like her husband, her kindness and warm personality is teared away by the dark magic. The climax of the season would see Asha and Starboy learning that the effects of dark magic can be reversed if the person being corrupted is "pure of heart" or something along those lines and them having to battle Amaya who has gone full evil queen mode but would ultimately be saved by Asha who brings the good back out of her.

We'd also get little hints to how the stars, in this world at least, operate i.e. why and how Starboy is different from Star, Starboy's connection with Star and how Star might be more powerful than one would think.

The ending of this season would have Asha and Starboy officially become a couple, Star regaining its strength and even having some more power than it had before, and Magnifico, who has fully given into evil, preparing a major attack on Rosas but in particular wants the powers of both Star and Starboy.

Season 3 (final season): This season would build up to a two- or three-part finale that has Magnifico unleash his full powers of evil on to Rosas. Asha would reach her final form and be just as good as wielding magic as Star and Starboy are, maybe a little better in some respects.

I have yet to really settle on an ending but one idea that I see potential in is when once the battle is over and Magnifico has been held off; Asha, Starboy and Star would become this celestial power team that fights for love and the wishes of those who are good of heart as they will lead the fight against Magnifico who is using the power of evil and selfishness to defeat the power of good. Each side would begin looking to others to help in this lifelong battle as no one can do this alone and we'd see outlines or models of characters that resemble classic Disney helpers and villains such as Malefecent and the fairy godmother.

I am torn on making that the ending as I really don't want Wish to become an DCU style mess where everything was "always connected". I want this story to have ties and tributes to the disney movies of the past but do not want this story to interfere or be the cause of previous disney stories. I also toyed with the idea of Asha and Starboy influencing the original writers of the stories like Hans Christian Anderson or the Brothers Grim but I found that idea to be way to meta for its own good but maybe it could work I don't know.

Random episode pitches:

I want there to be at least one episode that deals with Amaya processing her husbands betrayal and defeat. Amaya, in the movie, cared for Magnifico and I would like to explore how his choices affected her personally and psychologically.

There would be a few episodes that would be used to reaffirm the relationship between Asha and Starboy as they deal with having a good first date even though everything seems to be going wrong and one getting jealous as someone else tries to flirt with one of them. I kind of want to give most of these episodes to Starboy as it grows his personality as I feel like he'd be the one getting jealous and trying to make the evening perfect.

I have considered some adventures taking place outside of Rosas, in other cities and kingdoms that look a lot like ones from other Disney stories. This is where we'd see Asha showcase her growth in magic and maturity that sets the stage for classic Disney stories to be told. I'd want to do at least one episode like this earlier on to gage reactions to see if the audience enjoys it when we tie into other Disney movies.

Early episodes in season one would focus on Asha growing her skills as a magic user. Once Starboy arrives he will be Asha's guide into more advance magic skills and season 3 would see her discover skills not even the stars knew were possible.

Season 2 would see an episode that has Star trying to push Asha and Starboy together but their relationship is not at that point yet but in the end we'd see the beginning of the romantic interests.

When Asha and Starboy admit their true feelings, I have considered doing an original song and not the demo version of At All Costs as everyone has done this and I want this to be different plus the moment may call for a song that fits it. I would like to use the song as its a nice callback to Asha's first meeting with Magnifico and what started this journey.

I want some episodes that showcase Asha's friends as well as other citizens of Rosas. I want to give Asha's friends a bit more to their character than just representations of the seven dwarfs and flesh out the kingdom a little more.

I am unsure if Sabino should pass away during the series or not. If he does I want to take it serious and have Asha and Starboy be there with Sabino having interacted with Starboy before then. This most likely would happen in the final season as Sabino's passing would give Asha the motivation to venture outside of Rosas.

We'd have an episode to learn more about Asha's dad, his backstory, how he met Sakina and how his passing affected the family. Starboy could learn more about Asha's family from this and that strengthens the bond between him and Asha as well as make a good parallel between his relationship with Star and Asha's relationship with her family.

In the mirror world we'd see how Magnifico interacted with Asha's mother, father and Sabino before the events of the movie. It would be interesting to see how that relationship fit into Asha working under the royal family.

Conclusion: I think Wish has a lot of potential but I know something like this has little to no chance of happening. And before you ask, I do not see myself writing actual scripts or stories because I just don't have the time or patience at the moment to go fully into this. This is just to satisfy my creative needs and to get these ideas on paper. If you're inspired by some of these ideas you are more than happy to make your own scripts, stories, animations and whatever just please credit me for ideas. Thank you for reading and have a great day

#disney wish #disney #wish #wish 2023 #wish reimagined #wish rewrite #disney star #asha x star #fandom #starboy #tv series #concept

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oc-beehive · 8 months

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Presenting Mamoru Wada, Ultimate EMT!

He's not a paramedic yet, he just needs a few hundred more training hours under his belt. If he was, that'd probably be his thing. He's used to long hours, last-minute shift coverage, and high stress environments. "High stress" in this case meaning that his whole job is being there when somebody is having the worst day of their life. He's experienced a lot of situations most people could never imagine - both the horribly traumatizing and the laughably comedic. The nature of EMT work means he'll be on call for 24+ hours at a time... And that's even when he's not covering for somebody else. He's not a natural night owl, so he usually gets back home at 3 AM and immediately crashes on the nearest soft surface.

... Speaking of getting back home, he's Yuuma Shiraishi's roommate. The two of them met at a crime scene - Mamoru was providing first aid for the victim of a violent attack, and Yuuma (who happened to be working the prime suspect's case at the time) wandered onto the scene. They ran into each other. Literally. Mamoru proceeded to give him the scolding of his life for walking into an active crime scene and getting in the way of EMS. You could say they started off on a bit of a rough foot.

Mamoru has some temper and anger issues, especially under stress; usually it's something he can keep in check (thanks therapy!), but he's quick to set off if things don't go according to plan. This can lead to him seeming a bit bossy or strident. Usually, he has a really clear plan of shit that needs to be done, and doesn't take kindly to interruptions. His groove is thrown off, if you will. This is actually a boon when he's at work - he's very good at taking charge and getting people to mobilize - but not as great when you're just trying to wash the goddamn dishes. (You're doing it WRONG!!!!)

Thankfully, Mamoru is just as much caring as he is passionate. Everything he does is driven by a desire to help other people as much as he can. It's something that makes him feel good! He truly enjoys knowing that he can be there for people in their darkest hour, even if it means sacrificing sleep and attaining heaps of vicarious trauma. He would never call himself altruistic - sure, maybe it's selfish to do EMT work just because it gives him the warm fuzzies. But it's his calling! There's nothing else he'd rather do.

Despite their initial incompatibility, Yuuma and Mamoru went out for an apology coffee after their chance meeting, on Mamoru's behest. Turned out that they were both having trouble with rent and commute, and the rest is pretty much history. As of "present day" (the time I usually depict them), they've been living together for 2-3 years. They've also been absolutely insufferably mutually pining for at least a year and a half. They have weekly romcom movie night cuddle sessions. Mamoru gives Yuu a kiss goodbye when he heads to work. They share a bed. Neither of them has said a word about it. It's painful to watch.

Hope you enjoy hearing about it though, because I can't shut up about them.

#Diagnosis: Lovesickness | Mamoru Wada #danganronpa oc #Mamoru wears out stress balls within a few weeks of buying them #but dw about it he's smiling through the pain (genuine) (healthy) (mostly stable)

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visionthefox · 1 month

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Really long post as a warning, apologies in advance

The new therapy episode is out with Moon this time and personally...I feel a little...Underwhelmed? Like things weren't addressed fully or didn't go far enough? It might just be because of headcanons but going point by point

Moon said he was involving Sun more with plans surrounding Solar but no he hasn't, he's told Sun about things but he hasn't actually asked Sun to help him on missions or with building anything, it's at least good that he's keep Sun somewhat in the loop but still

Sarcasm doesn't even begin to cover how Old Moon was, and the whole thing about "everything he did was because he loved and wanted to protect us" feels...Weird, because yes that was some of it, but Old Moon went about those things the complete wrong way, I mean he locked Sun in a bunker when he couldn't convince Sun out of going after Eclipse, and a bunch of other things like that, and other times what he did wasn't him even protecting them but lashing out or being impulsive, or doing things to avoid dealing with emotions or consequences, he was a bit of a coward, not everything Old Moon did was benevolent, a lot of it was selfish too

Old Moon not wanting to speak to Sun is also cowardly, and even if Old Moon is fearing it because "its the only thing he'll remember from now on", so what? He and Sun need closure and if he's afraid he'll lash out and hurt Sun he needs to control himself and actually apologize and listen to Sun's grievances rather than steamrolling or minimizing them, Sun may need convincing because of course he'd be avoidant, but this feels important enough that it probably should happen, and maybe Earth could help if she were to be there, if nothing else to be Sun's supportive rock in case things get heated, though it might also be good if Sun stands on his own, either way Earth's right that it might if nothing else bring clarity and closure if it were to happen

Old Moon telling New Moon to sacrifice himself again, even if he later went back on it, felt so wrong, because Old Moon had several other reasons he sacrificed himself besides just protecting people, like being crushed by guilt but not wanting to face it, doing it without asking anybody first because he didn't want to or didn't think it or whatever reason he had, and to ask New Moon to do that again even though, considering Old Moon could see New Moon's memories he could probably see how badly the grief of losing Old Moon affected everyone, especially Sun, if he claims to care about and want them to be happy so badly he shouldn't ask New Moon to put his family through the same trauma again, no wonder New Moon was put off, also Old Moon had threatened New Moon that if he failed to protect them he'd make New Moon pay and even if that was an empty threat that was still a threat

I feel like New Moon's concerns about Sun are valid, not that Sun has displayed actual worrying tendencies(yet), but we all know Sun's still bottling things up, keeping things quiet, he's so tired of losing everything and previously he did go to incredible lengths to protect people...Only for it to backfire(Old Moon's death, Bloodmoon in a way because of the psychological consequences for himself), and Sun taking a break from everything, I get what they mean, him stepping away, but as you've stated before it moreso felt like he was just left alone and nobody talked to him as usual, he still felt excluded and left to potentially fester, who knows if he's still hallucinating anymore

I want to see more of these talks Earth referred to since it still feels like Sun's left out of things and when we do see his therapy episodes he's still so quiet

And yeah...Sun is strong! Really freaking strong considering everything he's been through would break a lot of people and yet his mind hasn't snapped yet

I totally get why New Moon feels like he doesn't match up to Old Moon, not feeling smart enough or good enough, that somehow he is being "held back", yet I also feel like its a good thing, New Moon not being as angry and holding himself to a higher standard is a good thing, one of Old Moon's biggest flaws was his anger and the ruthlessness that resulted from it, the fact that Solar was the only one keeping New Moon back with his anger felt a bit odd though, I get why Sun wouldn't intervene because of trauma from Old Moon's outbursts, but it feels weird that Solar was the only person that could get New Moon to calm down and listen when in an enraged state, if New Moon is aware of that and doesn't want to be that way he could take steps to fix it now that Solar isn't around anymore(I miss Solar)

Old Moon did leave a legacy, but it wasn't a good one, it feels bad that that legacy haunts New Moon and was the first thing shoved on him since he has proven himself to be better than Old Moon in a lot of ways, but old vendettas die hard

I'm not going to address KC much(because thoughts on him his redemption still felt so weird), but it feels really weird that he didn't mention Dark Sun here, because this was the perfect place to mention him, why not tell Earth and Lunar since they should know if there's a potentially dangerous doppelganger of Sun running around, and have New Moon voice his feelings around seeing Dark Sun, since he was shaken when he first met him and it might be good for New Moon to process it, come to realize certain things about the greater multiverse and whatnot

It felt a little unsatisfying because it feels like some things were not addressed, like there could've been more revelations that could've happened but didn't, nothing was mentioned about Dark Sun, etc...Also a little miffed they didn't lay into Old Moon more but that's a nitpick. Though! The episode was still good in that it brought up some good points, not to seem like it's wholly negative, its good to see Moon get some more therapy after his breakdown and Sun giving him a break day

...Boy that was long...But what does everyone think?

OHH LONG TEXT! yaassss also, for my sake, I wont be seeying the ep right now, so I take your words, plus even if I do see it, I sense I know how usually these chats go, also is mostly opinion base over here !

I do agree on something- these "therapy" seems at times, a one side chat of Earth trying to move the combo around (not bad but- I dont think thats what therapist should do..?) and other times is people just speaking without much "line" to follow and I guess is the only "real" thing on a therapy, you dont walk in there with a script, you let your ideas flow, and is a mess- yet still, you go there with a goal - kinda of. you let things out- or try to. I do see why Moon would not adress the actual important issue when in a emotional state, he seems to do that often, block on the issue and panic- stress and not listen.. (also yes- Sun has trauma with OldMoon but so did Solar too, why does he gets to be one calming Moon tho? is cute in ship but in canon is.. mmh-) Old Moon is always a eeky topic to touch, since we know he did loved his family, but we also cant deny all the trauma HE caused too and how many flaws he has, is not hate on him, is seeying the holes, adress the holes, and hope it would be fixed sooner Same as Sun, in my side- I dont want Sun to die- but Im not gonna deny the rather worrying details of is "calm life" - the drinking, being alone for too long (as a rather Social AI mind ya!) how he does go silent when Earth or anyone mention "how happy you look" they NEVER had meet his true happy self, his carefree self, his actual self.. they know the "not so stress out" Sun only.. and is sad! because Earth mistakes "happy" with "calm" is not the same Sun had lied before, with his magic, with being ok, with BloodMoon for months before anyone noticed - he can hide his issues again- one can hope now his family can indeed notice and not think "oh he is fine tho!" in all, I love your comment! I love this ask, is interesting and well, I could go deeper but I guess I did made my takes clear in the past- so I do want to know what others think of your ask too <3 leave another ask or comment in the post! what do you think? :D

#ask #tsams #sams #I feel like anon just put all my ideas better written too so I cant add more!#this is right on my view! so many issues yet also so much to fix for the development #if there even will be one at this point tho mm

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crazy-fangirl2524 · 1 year

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I’m right where you left me

Aaron should have expected this. He should’ve known that this is going to happen. Every single good thing that he has never last. He will never be good enough. Katelyn broke up with him because “being with Aaron is too much.” And Aaron understands, his psychotic brother and derange boyfriend, his trauma and the stupid fucking foxes. Of course it will all be too much. He doesn’t blame Katelyn.

So why is he completely shattered when Kevin left him for Andrew and Neil?

Kevin and he are nothing, just two guys fucking because they have nothing better to do. So it is Aaron’s fault for falling. And how can he not? When Kevin is the one to take care of him and make sure he is okay after they fucked every time. When they go out and have dinners and watch movies and take late night walks at the beach. When Kevin helps Aaron to study for his finals, making him food and reminding him to drink water.

Aaron has no one. The broken deal he had with Andrew left him with no friends. He had Katelyn, but now, he only has the fucking foxes. So of course it will be Kevin.

Aaron is not delusional, they explicitly say that they are only friends with benefits. Kevin tells Aaron many times how much he looks like Andrew. Kevin whispers to Aaron that he likes Andrew but Andrew is with Neil and Kevin cannot decide if he likes Andrew or Neil more. Aaron knows all of these. Kevin can never hide it well when he is staring at Andrew and Neil.

Aaron notices Andrew noticing. Aaron just did not expect Andrew to talk to him about it.

“What is going on between you and Kevin?” Andrew asks Aaron one day, when they are somehow alone in Andrew’s room.

“Nothing,”

“Don’t lie to me.” Aaron does not answer. But andrew will not budge and there is no one more stubborn than Andrew maybe except Neil.

“We are just friends with benefits.” Aaron snaps.

“Kevin likes Neil and I.” Andrew casually says, taking a cigarette and lighting it.

“I know,”

“Neil and I don’t mind,” Aaron’s entire world collapses right there and then.

“Okay, I don’t care.” Whatever pieces of Aaron’s heart that are left have burnt up to ashes.

Andrew looks at him, but Aaron has been in therapy with Andrew long enough that Aaron knows how to hide something from him.

Without another word, Andrew left Aaron, taking the ashes with him.

Aaron stands there stupidly. He feels like crying. He does not want to cry. He cannot cry. His chest is burning and his eyes are watering and he cannot breathe and he needs to get out of Andrew’s room before anyone comes back and go back to his room and lock it and-

The door opens, Kevin comes in and one look at Aaron’s blank face he envelops him in his arms.

“What’s wrong?”

Aaron cannot talk, his throat is so tight that if he speaks then all that will come out of it are screams.

Aaron wants to pull away, before the remaining pieces of his soul are ruined. But he is selfish and desperate and a masochist. So he allows himself to stay in Kevin’s embrace. He hugs him back tightly.

“What’s wrong?” Kevin asks again, sounding very concerned.

“Just terrified of my finals,” Aaron mumbles into Kevin’s hoodie.

“You will ace it,” Kevin says, “I’ll help you.”

No you won’t. You will be with Andrew and Neil.

“Okay,” Aaron says.

Then Kevin kisses him. And one thing leads to another and they end up in Kevin’s bed.

Aaron wakes up to an empty bed. He should get used to it. But he already misses waking up in Kevin’s arms. Aaron cannot help but lingers in Kevin’s bed before getting out.

Aaron tries to go on as usual. He goes to classes, he goes to practices, he studies. He tries to ignore Kevin. Kevin is confused at first, seems even a bit hurt. But then he spends all his time with Andrew and Neil. And Aaron knows that Andrew and Neil told him.

So there is nothing left for Aaron. Once again Aaron is being left.

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ryverbind · 1 year

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Faceless Fixation {Sal Fisher}: Coffee? [4]

Me, Larry, and Todd are quietly sitting and waiting for Ash to convince Sal to join the voice chat. Apparently, the prick has never gotten angry enough to leave the chat before, so Ash is going nurse his bruised ego back to health. I laughed about it, but no one else found it that funny. I get it. I guess.

So I sit with my headset on and my arms crossed over my chest with Call of Duty's Warzone loaded on my screen. Todd and Larry haven't said a word-- I almost wonder if they're muted.

I hear some Discord notifications, then Ash's over-exaggerated sigh. I sit up quickly, uncrossing my arms as I prepare to get into another argument with Sally.

Instead of feeling remorseful or even guilty, I feel energetic to the point where I have to remind myself that stooping down to his level isn't a good thing. But it still feels so damn good.

"Alright everyone," Ash says. When she's serious, she always says 'alright' in that exhausted, slightly disappointed tone. "We're having a meeting. Call this therapy because, clearly, some of you fuckers need it!"

I hold my breath and my stomach turns with excitement as words just leave my mouth without command. "Yea, I'm sure Sally needs some therapy after that burn. It's okay, buddy. We all support you."

"Y/--" Ash chokes on the first syllable of my name and I hold my breath again, but this time it's not out of eagerness. Fuck, I guess that one was a warning for me to just shut the fuck up from the universe.

Thankfully, Ash spits out a random word that starts with the same sound as the beginning of my name. It's random enough and the others are used to it, so no one says anything.

"Dammit, Vi!" Ash tries again, a tremor in her voice. I gulp, chewing on my bottom lip anxiously. That was way too close, but it's my own fault. "This is serious. Sally's pissed off and the two of you are way too hostile. This needs to end, or tone it down a bit at least."

My mouth feels dry and sticky as the guilt I wasn't feeling earlier starts to pick at my brain. I don't want to feel bad because if anyone should feel bad, it's Sal. He's a dick to me for no reason and it's fueled every one of my reactions. That's exactly why we're having a damn group intervention right now.

But, then again, all we're doing is giving Ash, Larry, and Todd a hard time. I genuinely don't want to do that. I feel selfish realizing that I've ignored how they may be feeling over the situation.

I chew on my lip and try to bite back my pride because the truth of the matter is that I need to apologize. My insides burn and I swear I'll make my lip bleed, but it's for the good of the group, right? Sal will let up, and maybe we'll even become friends. Right?

"Sally," I say with a sigh, trying to push away the slight sarcasm that leaks through my words. Fuck, it physically pains me to have to do this. "Listen, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have... done or said what I did. Can we, maybe, start over?"

I hear a scoff. My eyes narrow and my head clears. It's a moment of clarity for me-- not quite an epiphany, but a full second of time where I accept reality. It's a point in my life where I ditch any original plan I had just come up with.

"Shut up," Sally's voice bites out. Then he sighs heavily. "You're not my friend and there is no do-over. The only thing that's saving you right now is that I refuse to let you tear apart everything me, Ash, Larry, and Todd have built up. You will not get in the way. You're just an obstacle on my righteous path of life." His voice is confident, even amused as he speaks rather than the instant aggression he originally addressed me with.

I tilt my head and swallow thickly, "You know what?" I say, adopting a clear and gentle voice. Honestly, I'm kind of tired of fighting with him by now because he can't overlook whatever bullshit he's starting. He's a brick wall. At the same time though, I see how things must look to him. I'm some random person who's causing trouble-- a possibility that could break up the group he's worked so hard on. If I were in Sally's place, I'd feel threatened too. "That's fine by me. I have no intentions of breaking up your group-- I never have. I just want to get to where you guys are, make some friends in the process. I mean no harm."

"You do know that offering to choke on my cock is the quickest way to break up a group, right?" Sally snorts, his voice filled with accusation and humor.

So he finds this entire thing funny now. And for once, he scores a point. I can only win for so long, I suppose.

A blush tinges my cheeks and I pinch my lips together. He's managed to embarrass me and spew the truth at the same time. I can't fucking stand him, but I respect the accomplished attempt. I'm a fair person. He gets two points in my book for that one, but he doesn't have to know I respect him.

"So you don't want your dick in my mouth?" I ask, cocking an eyebrow even though he can't see it.

"Can you both just stop?" Ash says tiredly, clearly exasperated.

The reminder that I'm probably stressing all of my friends out makes me see rationally again, so I swallow back whatever else I was going to say.

"Sorry guys, I'm done with it. Let's play some games," I say, forcing a smile on my face. It's a facade to try and feel like I'm actually enjoying myself and not acting like a total bitch.

"I'm not done," Sally's voice comes in and his claim makes me sit up in my chair. No point in that, I'm just watching my character walk around with a gun at the ready-- nothing else. But it felt right to sit up-- to have a physical reaction. He never fails to fucking shock me.

"You've never seen my face, but you want my dick so damn bad, don't you?" he continues, chuckling at the end, like he genuinely can't help but find our situation funny. Probably because he knows he's beat me out on this game.

I sigh, and force myself to fight off the painful urge to kill his pride right now. I want to put him in his place so bad, but in the grand scheme of things, Sally means nothing. He has nothing to do with my future, nor will he be in it.

"That's highly inappropriate, Sally," I say softly, wincing at the obviously fake tone. "Let's just play, okay?"

Sally hums, the sound sending chills down my spine. It's sarcastic, it's meant to get under my skin, but fuck it feels good. I'm shocked into stillness for a moment, recalling the way his skin felt beneath my fingertips a few days ago. The way he spoke to me kindly, softly. His attractive mannerisms, his tattoos, and the look in his eyes when they met mine.

I shake myself out of the moment, taking a deep breath to quell the uncomfortable flutters in my chest.

"Let's play, then," he purrs, the sound of his voice digging into every inch of me in, unfortunately, all the best ways. "Just remember, if you end up with my cock in your hands, it's your position in jeopardy here, not mine."

Why is everyone so fucking silent?

Having to ignore his remark as quietude ensues around us makes me physically heat up. I've done a lot of averting and ignoring tonight and I can only do it for so much longer.

"The second you all start talking is when this ends," I snap harshly. "So talk."

"Yes, ma'am. Starting my stream now," Larry chuckles. It takes that instant of pure hilarity from my friend to realize that he genuinely has no issue with what we're doing. If anything, I think he may enjoy it. At least that's one person off my list of worries-- I'm not sure about Todd's stance. Ash has made her opinion clear.

We stay quiet out of respect for Larry, Todd, Ash, and Sally as they do their short introductions. I grow nervous as Ash closes her own intro up because that means I'm next.

There's no telling if anyone will even join my Twitch stream. I have hardly any followers anywhere, I've just started out. I don't even know what to say or do either. Todd and Larry had to break their backs trying to help me figure out how to work Twitch to begin with. The beginning of our Discord call was spent with panic and aggravated sighs.

"We have our sweet VioletViolence with us today and she'll be streaming for the first time too!" Ash chirps sweetly, addressing the fucking elephant in the room. "You know how to start everything up, baby?"

"Err," I spit out nervously, feeling around my keyboard for now reason at all as I start up my own stream. A spear of anxiousness travels through my system and I squint my eyes, wishing I could take it back.

But what helps is that ten people join the stream at the same exact time. From there, people join one by one every second or so.

This is real. I'm even more nervous now, but I'm hyped up over the fact that I won't be sitting in a barren stream.

"Uh, hi everyone. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing," I giggle, swiping a hand through my hair and releasing a shaky breath.

Ash giggles and Todd snorts.

"It's okay," Todd says reassuringly despite his somewhat monotone voice. "Introduce yourself and kind of go with what feels right from there."

If Sally was speaking at all right now, this wouldn't be going as smoothly. Another aggravating thing I respect about him, I guess.

"Thanks, Todd," I say sweetly, grinning as I look over a few comments on my screen. "My name is VioletViolence, and I don't have a cool trademark line yet, but I guess I'll say something ridiculous at some point. Welcome to my stream though, we're chaotic here and it's bound to get spicy eventually."

My eyes glance over a comment talking about Sally and how the person loves our banter, so I snort over it, scrunching my eyebrows. "That's cute," I laugh good-naturedly. "I think Sally would raise hell if he saw someone talking about our arguments as banter. Regardless, I'm glad you like it. It does get pretty fun."

An influx of comments come in and I lean back in my seat, grimacing. I should have stayed quiet.

"Banter!?" Sally exclaims over the mic, his voice cracking under the shock. "I can't stand this bitch!"

I roll my eyes, a smile pulling at my lips. He's such a literal cunt, but people love it.

"Awe, you love me. Don't lie," I coo, clicking on a couple things on my screen. Impatiently waiting to finish yelling at Sally so I can lose myself in Call of Duty. Kill bitches, feel better. "You couldn't shut up about having your dick in my mouth two minutes ago."

Sally grumbles, some aggression hidden in his deep voice that makes me giddy for a good fight instantly. "You're putting words into my mouth, dumbass. Get it right-- you're the one who offered to suck me off."

"Mmm," I hum, licking my lips. "You've read me wrong. I didn't offer, but you seemed intrigued by the thought and kept the topic alive. I'm sure you'd prefer something other than my fingers in your mouth, too, wouldn't you?"

"Oh, bi--" Sally's voice has real edge to it before he gets cut off by Larry. For a moment, I was a little worried he might try and find me to argue this out in person. The harshness of his voice actually made me flinch.

But now that it's over, the adrenaline rush feels fantastic.

"Oookay, that's enough you two. You gave the audience what they want. Let's move on," Larry actually cackles, loading up a new game. "Anyway, Vi! You any good at COD?"

I give Larry my best little evil laugh and scroll through my gun options. "Oh, I eat ass at this game so prepare yourselves," I say, clicking on my best options-- the options I know well enough, in and out, to really show what I've got. Call of Duty is the first game I've ever played, which means I've had plenty of time to get used to it.

"Is... that a good or bad thing?" Todd asks, genuine curiosity and a little bit of fear in his voice. The absurdity makes me want to laugh.

With a smile, I join the game with my friends and prepare to show up every single person in this lobby. "It means my skills are gonna leave you incapacitated for weeks. This tongue game is just as serious as my thumb game."

Ash, Larry and Todd burst into uncontrollable laughter, big sighs and choking the only thing I can hear for a bit. I didn't think it was that funny, but they did so that makes me smile excitedly. I'll have to keep working on my humor, but this is a start, isn't it?

I glance over at my twitch stream and note that 2,036 people are watching me right now and my comments are wild over the words I just said, one of them saying that I've already found my catchphrase.

I'm playing a game with over two thousand people in attendance to watch me kick ass. This feels amazing, but scary all at the same time. I have to watch what I say and do. The world is a beautiful place, but it's a haunting one too. One wrong move and shit can end just as quickly as it's begun.

I address some of my comments, grinning as our game starts and I hide myself behind a corner for a moment, listening to Ash yell at Larry to stop laughing.

"You guys like my serious tongue and thumb game? That got you?" I giggle, tilting my head curiously.

A ton of comments come in stating that they do, in fact, like the claim. "So what if I replace serious with dangerous?" I ask, spotting an unfortunate soul crossing my path.

"Fuck!" Sally exclaims suddenly, a lot of clicking and huffing going on on his end of the call. "I need help, some asshole's lighting me up."

Larry harrumphs, "A bro in need is a bro indeed," he says. "On my way!"

The phrase makes me laugh as I take off in Sally and Larry's direction as well, targeting who I can along the way. "You sure it isn't me kicking your ass?" I ask.

"That'd be cute wouldn't it?" Sally snaps, his voice grating. "Too bad you can't target group members in this setting. Otherwise, you'd be dead."

"Bold of you to assume I'm not already dead," I say sweetly, veering around a corner and finally spotting both boys.

"I wish you were." Sally grunts out, sighing exasperatedly.

"If I was, then you'd be dead, too." My tone is serious for a moment. Sally Face really was drowning in opponents and they were gunning him down bad, so I take out the last two to my left while Larry and Sally handle the others.

Sally's character spins around as I do and he notes my presence. I can't see him and I'm nowhere near him in person, but I can just smell his rage from across this continent that we both reside on.

"Fuck off," he bites out.

"I think you'd prefer to... fuck on," I can't help the smirk that envelops my face at the dumb joke. Sally doesn't find it funny, but my viewers, Larry, Ash, and Todd giggle at it.

Then an enemy pops up behind Sally while he's struggling to find something to say and the worst happens. Sally goes down in an instant-- I couldn't save him in time but I do avenge him by finishing the enemy. Friend or not, Sally is my teammate.

The issue is that he's dead because of me. Oops.

"Shit, sorry," I murmur, hot-cheeked and chewing my lips in embarrassment. I know he's going to be pissed.

"Dumb bitch," he spits out. "You just have to argue over everything."

Ew. Gross. "I apologized, asshat. Get over it. I was in the wrong, it happened, it's over. Don't be a dick," I grunt out, a little disgusted over his instant reaction as I keep playing with Ash, Larry, and Todd.

"Yea man, low blow," Larry murmurs.

"The two of you need to tone down the hostility. It's funny when it's friendly, but you went a bit far, Sally," Todd says matter-of-factly.

Fuck, his friends defending me is just going to piss him off even more.

"Yea, okay," Sally huffs out, less than pleased but forced to hold up a facade for the sake of his fans. I can only imagine what he's going to say when we end our streams later. "I'm going get coffee."

There's that damn accent. It's so nice and steals my attention immediately. The stupid way he says 'coffee' is so damn distracting that I can't stop myself from saying, "Wait, Sally, say that again."

The fear that erupts in my body gets me killed too. Everything goes to chaos for a moment, Larry yelling as I try to save myself, me panic running and still losing, then my comment section absolutely losing their minds.

Damn him. He could have just said something like "be back in a second." Why did he have to say the word 'coffee?'

I take a breath as I watch my dead body on my screen. Larry is breathing hard, Ash let out a little "oop" and Todd is off dominating elsewhere. Hopefully, Sally left before he could hear what I said.

That would be the best case scenario considering it was a moment of weakness for me. Please, let him be gone.

Of course he isn't though.

"What?" Sally suddenly asks, voice scrutinizing like he's trying to understand what just went on. The rest of the group is immersed in the game, so I lean back in my chair with wide eyes and a defeated little huff.

"What do you mean, what?" I ask nervously. Right now, Sally and I's viewers are just listening to us. This is a bad moment with no outside distractions to move us on to some other topic.

"You told me to say something again. What did you want me to say?" he says, seemingly short-fused. He's acting like he's sparing me just this once, like he's giving me a little break. The bastard.

I swallow thickly, squeezing my eyes shut as I try to remind myself that I really need to play up my act. No one can see how fucking embarrassed I am, so I can't let them hear that I am, especially Sally. "It doesn't matter. I thought you said something different."

"You sure?" Sally asks, a meticulous edge to his raspy voice. I shiver for what feels like the hundredth time tonight. He's too good with the way he speaks-- not specifically the words, but the way he uses them. "Did the accent get you?"

Dammit. This mustn't be the first time he's gotten shit about the way he says some things.

I try desperately hard to hold back a groan. What else should I say? How can I deflect-- deny? I... don't think I can.

"Yea," I improvise, bringing my fingers to my lips. "It sounded... cool. Where are you from?"

Sally and I have never had a normal conversation before so trying to initiate one to save my own ass is awkward. I don't know how to talk to him like a normal person.

Sally snorts. "Yea. I get bitches with the accent. Wish you were next?"

I roll my eyes and drop my hand back to my table. "You're such an ass. I was just trying to make casual conversation, you know?"

"That's not a 'no,'" he chuckles lowly and I feel like I'm going to fall apart. He needs to contain this asshole-ish, aggressive flirting because it's tearing me apart. It fills me with rage, but attracts me to him at the same time. I've never hated a guy's charm more than I do his.

"It's a no. I do not want you, Sally Face," I rush out, attempting to keep any hostility out of my voice even if it's incredibly hard. "Just tell me where you're from."

"Nope. I don't see why that's relevant when there are more important topics, such as your very obvious attraction to me." Sally quips, laughing lightly like he enjoys terrorizing me. He definitely enjoys it.

"Oh, really?" I grit out. "You keep bringing up this attraction you think I have for you, so are you sure it isn't the other way around?"

"More than. I've never seen you before. How could I be attracted to you? Not to mention, your personality is utter shit." Sally's insult is fired back at me angrily. Every time he's not in control, he gets pissed off. All I have to do is flip the switch on him, huh?

"Oh, there's no need to lie, Sally," I antagonize. "What about when I sent photos on Discord earlier? You disappeared then came back so, so angry. Were you just upset that you thought I was hot? What happened there?" If he can play this game, then I can, too. Fuck moving on, I'll bring up the past if it just so happens to be in my favor.

"I disappeared because there were more important things to do. You just think so highly of yourself, don't you? You think you're the center of attention. I saw your bullshit in the chat and left to get some water while everyone else hyped you up for no reason." Sally's smart, I'll give him that. He's quick with his rebuttals and he knows how to make me fucking itch.

For example, he pulled out his trump card-- that fucking accent again. He said 'water' on purpose. And no, I'm not hearing anyone out. Of course he said that on purpose.

No, I'm not just losing my mind because he's hot and and irking me all at once. I'm fine.

Before a syllable can even leave my mouth, Ash pipes up and cuts our argument short.

To say I'm fuming and yearning for Sal's neck in my hands is an understatement. And I'm not even quite sure how I want his neck in my grasp-- to assert dominance or to actual wring him fucking breathless.

"Hey, you fuming little fairies," Ash chirps with a giggle. "We won. Let's start a new game."

"No thanks to the bitch in the chat, of course," Sally's sighs. I can hear the mocking smile in his voice. "But yea, new game."

Things are getting worse, not better.

#sally face fandom #sally face #sal fisher #sally face fanfiction #future smut #ash campbell #larry johnson #enemies to lovers #todd morrison #travis phelps

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bwobgames · 1 year

Text

Previous First

"I. Uh. Might have developed a small crush on my brother's girlfriend.

Now, I dont really believe in love at first sight. But it was close enough.

She smiled at me once, twice, thrice, and then I realized I wanted to see that smile forever. It's just!! Everything felt better with her by my side, you know? Have you ever felt that?"

An image comes to his mind, but he can't recognize it. It quickly disappears.

"We were best friends. We shared makeup and talked all night and raised kids together, bestie stuff.

I always thought of me and my brother as equals, i mean, we are both dumb rich kids who love pretty girls and sweet popcorn

But I never understood his ambition. He had everything! A beautiful wife, lovely kids, money, time, fame. Some of us dont have even one of those things!

So why did he not care about them?

He just left Mari abandoned in their house everyday, he barely went to do his job as CEO, He just ran around doing whatever! Why couldn't he just see how good he has it? The people he was hurting? The responsibilities of a husband and father??

One day Mari came to me, barely speaking, saying he divorced her.

I uh, didn't take it very well.

In my defense, if you saw someone having everything you've ever wanted and just threw it away, wouldn't you be a little mad?

And I know it's selfish and envy is bad or whatever. But he was hurting people. People I love very much. Even himself, i think.

We fought a lot, i told him he was a stupid spoiled child, and he told me i'd never achieve anything even with our parents' money. Then I, uh, said that I was glad he had little youth left because it meant he was gonna die soon.

Yeah... uh... maybe bringing childhood trauma into the divorce thing wasn't a good plan.

And I only realized it later, when he made some crazy internet thing and he was getting detained by the police.

Mari was not coping well, me neither, honestly. We both realized the person we knew was actually just in our heads and that the real person is some cruel stranger. It was almost like grieving.

We fought over the smallest things. Nadia and Simon decided to move to their friend's house. I went back to mine as well, I couldn't take it.

Just like him, I left her all alone. It must run in the family."

"So, yeah, she's probably super mad at me. And doesn't want to be with me ever again"

Beebo tries really hard not to tell her how wrong she is about that

"Well, let's go look for her then! I'll speak on your behalf, so you two dont have to face each other, but the message goes across. Where do you think she is?"

"Um, she said something about her kids, right? They usually are in the observation tower, so she might be looking for them there?"

"Alright, let's go there"

"I'm back I'm back!"

"The Vivi has been secured"

"You literally just made me turn every single location tracking app i have"

"And now you are secured"

"Um, hello?"

"Oh! This is my friend ..."

"Uh. Um. Oh fuck I still dont remember his name. And I literally asked him out! Seems like I still get all stupid in the presence of handsome men. I'll just wait until someone else says it"

" ... from college!, and his friend, Vivi right?"

"Hey Ollie, where is the lady with the blue hair I left you with?"

"We are going to her! She might be in an observation tower, we think"

"Wait, are we all going?"

"Yes. You need your emotional support me, I need my emotional support him and he needs his emotional support her"

"I can take it"

"Wait! I still dont know what to say to her! How do I say that Im sorry? That I love her?"

"I have suggestions"

"So do I"

"Mine would be funnier though"

"...Im so fucked"

#they are kind of stupid a bit #just a lil #detective beebo

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ask-the-k-rising-members · 9 months

Text

-ˏˋ⋆ character info 1 || next -> ⋆ˊˎ-

SNEEDLY

Name: Melvin "Sneedly"

Nicknames: Sneed, Gustavo/Gustavito (Jerry), and Mel

Pronouns: he/him [+ any pronouns]

Age: 9-10 (little age: 2-5)

Occupation: student, assistant, leader's punching bag (formerly)

State: alive

Last seen: September or November, ???

- - - - - -

Appearance

Before the tragic event, Sneedly had his normal light yellow shit with a red bowtie, pants mixed between blue and green and green-ish brown shoes.

Later after the incident/terrible event, his clothes were ripped and ruined, skin covered in bruises and wrist, forearm, thighs covered in scars (I'm not gonna explain why, just take a big guess :/ )

but later on he wears some clothes like Krupp's, his glasses were shattered and his hair was messy. His eyes were crossed (sometimes normal or crossed. Maybe he may have hypotropia but we don't know yet.)

- - - - - -

Personality

After the event he began changing, instead of a greedy and selfish tattletale, he became soft and sensitive. Due to his trauma he reacts quickly and panics. May act childish or friendly.

But if someone ever trigger him or harm him, Sneedly will immediately attack the person. His behavior may change from friendly to aggressive the more he changes.

- - - - - -

Trivia (well facts/mini info)

🖍• His intelligence was taken away BEFORE he was hospitalized few weeks. No one knows how he lost his intelligence but other says he was brainwashed or changed.

🧸• He was being used as a human experiment for his principal to test. Being treated like a rat and tormented.

🖍• Ever since he was out of the Hospital, Sneedly started acting weird, he bite or attack students and staffs (who tried to interact with him or accidentally triggered him at the point he would start harming someone), getting distracted easily, disobeying the staffs, biting & scratching himself. Struggling to speak properly and hiding himself away from people.

- At first, the Sneedly family thought it was normal at first until another complain came about their child biting a girl (Jessica) and ripping her skin from her arm with his bare teeth during a fight. This of course made Gaylord/Mr. Sneedly furious and stressed that his son was acting like an animal and tried his best to find a way to "fix" his child.

🧸• Unfortunately his dad didn't wanna spend money on therapy cuz according to him, therapy may be very expensive. Online or not Gaylord doubted that finding a useful therapist won't solve until one day in the middle of a parent meeting the principal decided to convince Mr. Sneedly to sign the contract (the organization paper), and explained he can actually "fix" him for the dad and Mr. Gaylord agreed.

- NOT realizing it's not a safe camp for children that has problems. It was a big lie that Mr. Sneedly took and brought the child to the school to let the principal take care of him for the parents.

🖍• During his first day, it was difficult cuz of lack of motivation and scared to trust his principal after all the things he has done to him BEFORE he was sent to the hospital. The yelling, bruises, insults and experiments were causing the child to be too weak and unstable to defend himself.

-But he was used to it now due to him not realizing he was developing Stockholm syndrome (NOT in the romantic way remember that now. Feeling pity and guilt for his principal/abuser)

- Sadly his future self still has the syndrome and has a toxic ex-partner who left him. Because of that Sneedly was too scared to be in another relationship with someone and blames himself for not being good enough

🧸• Would call his principal/leader "dad". Although the principal was an abusive and dangerous person, Sneedly would call him "dad" or "Papa Ben" to feel connected to him more than his actual father.

🖍• He age regress due to heavy trauma and stress. Tries very hard not to regress in front of others.

🧸• his relationship with the other assistants makes him feel "safe". Other Sophie and Dante are like big/older siblings to him while Harold was like a twin to him.

🖍• His interest are drawing, cartoon, color orange and sweeties

🧸• Meanwhile He may see Jerry/Mr. Citizen as the older brother, well a "dad" as well. But he's scared of other staffs.

🖍• Has trust issues, even if the person is a staff or a student he is scared to trust them.

🧸• the first assistant that has no number tag on his shirt unless he gets lost and needs to use a tag to remember his number.

#cu tbgdotgp au #krupp rising organization

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vren-diagram · 1 year

Text

I think weak sapier-whorf leads me to believe that therapy-speak must have some impact on interpersonal selfishness. Weak sapier-whorf reads:

Structural differences between language systems will, in general, be paralleled by nonlinguistic cognitive differences, of an unspecified sort, in the native speakers of the language.

Part of the therapy-speak framework exists to free people of social bonds and obligations. Often I hear therapy success stories that take the form:

I had several things in my life I felt like I needed to do.

These obligations were making me deeply unhappy.

Therapy helped me see that I don't have to perform those obligations anymore.

My therapist helped me exert some agency over how I handled the obligations, I feel better now.

It doesn't seem like the therapist here is strictly required to be worried about how positive or negative the externalities of their patients actions are. Good therapists probably have a sense that getting their patient to a point where they have positive-sum interactions in everyday life is critical to their long-term happiness. But therapists optimizing more for short-term patient satisfaction have other options. Options which probably includes a bunch of negative-externality things which give the patient an impression that they are exerting agency and making improvements to their life, but really result in some horrid behaviors that get legitimized under the guise of 'therapy-speak'.

Certainly I have felt license to act in ways I otherwise would not after I've been given a legitimizing framework and language to describe it. If there's a whole body of official looking mumbo-jumbo that describes how you can do self-care and nurture your inner child by making your feelings other people's problem why are we surprised that that sort of behavior would increase?

I think arguments of the form 'people who are doing therapy-speak to get away with bad actions were always sorta negative-sum interaction people and they're only using the therapy speak thing as a cover du jour' maybe prove too much. This seems like a generalized argument against cultural narratives having an effect on people's interpersonal actions.

#if this was an effortpost I would have generated examples #feel free to backfill those if you want

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sexwithamanda · 10 months

Text

A deep dive, a hike let's say. Not physically but mentally.

Episode #345

Hello,

I make these when I feel the most inspired. This last week was lovely, I went out a lot but I spent time with both my lovers, I pray they never read these, but I am sure one day these will be read, not aloud in a classroom I hope. It's a humid, hot, cloudy, wet day in the beautiful state of Florida. I am sitting at a coffee shop where I've tasted butterfly tea, which tastes like lemonade more than anything. It has a dark purple color and on the counter, I spied a cake that resembled Oreo. I decide for that, it's gluten and vegan. If I told you that I was trying to be healthier would you believe me? I suppose I don't seem to be that way. It was yummy, and I read a few (more than a few) pages of this memoir that has me on my toes. She is a writer and went to school for journalism. I've always felt that writing and putting something out there is insane. We all have a voice to talk about anything, that's why music is universal. If all the lyrics are in a different language, we still can continue to feel exactly what they are saying regardless of the fact that we don't speak that language.

Last week I went into a meeting, I like to speak as you can tell from my typing. I suppose that it is obvious that my clicking and clacking on my laptop in this quiet coffee shop seems to annoy the men next to me, but I digress with I am being me. Let it be. Right at this split second the song playing, is by tears for Fears. You decide if my life is a movie because I have already decided that it is. Anyways back to the meeting, I am talking about. I don't look at people as adults anymore. I assume everyone is a child, regardless of how you think t might be, we can be professional but we are all children at a point. Things we do, mistakes we make, and accomplishments that occur all happen because we learn from others. This meeting was an intro to exactly what I've been wanting for a while. A taste of who I could be as a public speaker. I don't think I'm perfect, but I think that healing is a journey that rules us over. We tend to be selfish about our lives. I had a conversation last night with my friend, and each time we speak I feel we learn a bit more about ourselves rather than the other. I give her the space to speak as she gives me my space to speak as well. I learned that I get tired easily maybe I should get that checked out but I can confirm that I love someone that I really shouldn't. It is okay though. Life is too short not to face the facts. I think head-on, I want to be exclusive with this person but I also think that I want to be friends. I need to deal with myself first, but once I feel that I can finally trust myself to trust someone I think that's when I could commit to them.

In other news, we both discovered that we miss each other dearly all the time, because we are two peas in a pod, and we have each other's back. I think that my sense of self is reflected in the darkness of my sorrows, and probably for good I can sense that I will be way better off. I guess for a while I thought that the only occupancy of people's company came with an abundant reach for bad decisions. I then tend to let myself be swept away from all reality when I am with my friends. They make me feel so safe, kind, and sweet. I got really lucky.

Next topic of discussion; my podcast, sex with Amanda on spotify. It is my baby, but let me explain that I know that people listen to it, people I know. I am brutally honest, and I am myself. I think that it is my therapy, the raw truth of my thoughts when it comes to it. I think the people that I want to listen to it won't, which is good for me. But, in actuality, these secrets are for the entire world to listen to. It's not just relatable it's my life. Inevitably it is my happiness. I feel a sense of ease after every Friday session. My episodes are unedited, I speak my truth and let myself be completely honest. (sometimes it is mean.)

Now here is a side note, my favorite thing to talk about is sex, but it is the education, the feeling, and the love of intimacy in the space of someone else that makes me feel loved. I love love. I love sex. I love sex with someone who makes me feel as though everything is right and how it is supposed to be. I don't want to be rushed unless it feels right but I also want to be healthy. I want it to be sacred in a way. I don't have sex with anyone, but with someone who has a connection to me, with me, and makes me feel good. If I've been intimate with someone, (if I chose to, because in some instances that is not the case), you have made me feel at ease. I love the feeling.

I have an addiction that is hard for me to describe, if you come across this, go on spotify, look up sex with Amanda. Take a listen to one of my episodes or wait till this upcoming Friday for the newest one. I can't wait to have a conversation with you.

Thank you for reading, listening, and being.

Mahal Kita,

Amanda

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armyhome · 11 months

Text

(Un) Perfects | Beomgyu

⇢ summary: Lilo is a complicated girl, but also is Beomgyu and the journey of both are a mess.

⇢ pairing: Lilo x Beomgyu.

⇢ a/n: hi my people, it's being a long time since lost in your love story right? well i was really trapped in this thing called adulthood, it's sucks i know, but for me is always better then anything i lived while i was a tennager, i'm working on that on therapy I promise, which is why this story came to me, I think, here you will find deep things about me, so please don't judge... too much... ok?I know we live in a plastic society today, where everyone is so perfect and lives those perfect lives, but in this story everyone is (un)perfect, like me, so I'm showing the most human that my perfectionism allowed me to be, hope you all undertand.

Chapter 1: Attention. Chapter 2: Ditto Chapter 3: Hype Boy

Chapter 4: OMG

Beomgyu's POV

Lilo gives me a lilac turtleneck shirt, and Soobin gives me his blue blazer, while Hueningkai pretends make my hair without care that Lilo wasn't speaking with him, unless directly.

"I will pretend I didn't notice that you are making my look the bissexual flag hyung" I jokling accuses him, and he smile at me.

"Talking about bisexual, you need have a serious conversation with Taehyun oppa" Lilo look at Soobin "I have stalking him, he seems interest on this guy" She sighs "I don't know all the details, but if you could open that old gay binary mind…"

"It will be my plesure" Soobin responds "Okay now let me look at Beomgyu" I stend up.

"You look stunning" Hueningkai says.

"Thanks" I feel my face burning.

"Let us see the boy again" Lilo asks, and I show his picture, was the first time I would go on a romantic date on cinema and all stuff like dinner, I was shaking inside. Soobin looks at the picture, so he looks at Lilo, and than me. without say and word, I know everything he wanna say.

Oh. My. God.

Lilo Fisher will drive me insane, and for some reason, I don't wanna her to stop since that kiss I feel like I was orbiting around her, was everything about her, my worries, my laughs, my fears, and if that feeling wasn't about her, I would share with her without a second thought, this witchcraft heavy shit, that's the only explanation. But god, listen to me, I'm the gayest person you delivered in the year I was born, why I'm kissing only boys that look like Lilo now?

"Here, use this necless" Lilo put around my neck, the perfume on her wrist was so good, that make me think about kiss her arm "This charm will give you luck" Was a tulip charm.

"I know it will"

The date was really good, Mark was a cool calm guy, that like literature like me, enjoy videogames like me, have great playlists, and amazing taste for movies, he holds my hand while we walk on street, and let me at Lilo's house at the end, because I lied about have forget my paperwork with a friend. But I just need talk to her before I sleep. When I lay on her bed, she was finishing math homework.

"How was your date?" She asks without looking at me, Lilo looks so cute using glasses.

"You never ask about my dates, what's wrong?" She give me her cellphone, showing a photo, of Yeonjun and Ariel at the same cinema I was, oh lord Me and Mark were in the back of the picture.

"I should be thankful that you choose someone that looks like me" She sighs "My idea is not fair to you bear, maybe we should end this fake dating thing" Those words make my heart tremble "You need to be happy in a full way…" Maybe I would be the first gay man in this world that would cry about a woman's fake romantic love.

"Maybe, I'm being too selfish with you, because I feel so comfortable with you, is like breath…." We laugh at my words, because never, even in our wildest dreams we could imagine becoming such good friends.

"If we break up what I would tell everyone?" She lays by my side on the bed, using my left arm as a pillow, and automatically I start to play with her hair.

"The truth" She simply says "I really don't mind, Ariel can think whatever she wanna, or maybe you're the kind of person that doesn't care about others' gender identity, like Soobin oppa" Her words click something inside of me, and I close my eyes to absorb "You seem sleepy, wanna take a nap before going? I can be the big spoon this time…" I turn my back to her, so she could dovetail on me.

"Are you not sad anymore, I mean because of Yeonjun and Ariel?" I ask carefully.

"I'm sad, I'm mad, and if Ariel posts that one more time that song I'll end up punching her, nothing makes me angrier than a withe girl telling a non-withe person that they wanna be on their skin…I think what hurts me more is because we were friends," She sighs "Yeonjun will be always my first love, but not my last, he keeps trying to stay in touch with me but I don't care, sometimes I wanna print every single message and post just to make Ariel suffer" I can't hold my smile, she was so brutal and honest "And you, how are your feelings about Yeonjun?"

"I'm used to seeing him dating, so nothing new, the good part is that this time I have a partner in crime…" So Lilo lay her head com my back.

"You know, we should do something fun, do you like horror movies?"

"No, I hated it, what about romcoms?" She will never convince me to watch horror movies, never.

"Only if they're Hong Kong 90's romcoms…" I turn to look at her, why her brain was so weird?

"Why do you have to be so specific?" She smile and press play, and one more time she was right, the'res magic on those movies that we don't see so much often,

So Lilo sleep on my arms, snores softly, I need to record to proves her later, this woman always saying that she didn't make a sound sleeping, but when I unblock my phone Soobin just have dropped a message that was almost a bible, so many words oh lord.

binnie: hi bear, how was your date? i hope that everything has being just great and that you found in mark your soulmate, but just in case you don't i must to say something, even kai telling me not to do, i know is not my position to do, cause my background is so differently of yours, since i was younger never make sense like just one, and when people tell me to choose, was too late hahaha', and in my case is so much more about affection than atratction, but you don't have the same luck, what make me think you may have the impression if you love Lilo in a romantic way, would make all those atrocities that you homophobic biological progenitor said about cure thruth, but love Lilo will not make you less queer I promise, this is part of who you're, and if you need to talk, i'm here, i love you young bro, and all of us will always have your back.

I can't control my tears as the same way I can't control my feelings, that night I sleep hugging Lilo, and I never slept so well like I did on her bed.

#txt fanfic #beomgyu imagines #txt #choi beomgyu #beomgyu fanfic #beomgyu fic #beomgyu #choi soobin #soobin #choi yeonjun #kang taehyun #hueningkai

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