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#if i had money right now i would be buying all of these
kyunzin · 1 day
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𝐅𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐦𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐝 𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲
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✰ characters ✰ 𝐘. 𝐄𝐫𝐞𝐧
✰ summary ✰ don’t say things you don’t mean, unless you do mean them. in that case eren can fulfil all your requests (f!reader)
✰ tags/warnings ✰ nsfw, ex!eren, alcohol use, degradation, spanking, daddy kink, cum eating, squirting. praise kink, overstimulation, pussy licking
✰ kyun’s note ✰ it’s been long overdue, two long fics in a row is tough gang dont do this at home. also sorry for any spelling mistakes i am sleep derived
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it was definitely a good idea to go out with the girls
it was probably a bad idea to not send eren home with all the drinks you had earlier clouding your judgment
it was absolutely going to hurt in the morning but that is the last thing that's on your mind right now it will be a problem for later
you and eren had gotten together in high school and stayed together for the duration of high school. the both of you being fairly well known though he was more popular than you were.
the both of you had different passions and wanted to peruse different careers. him wanting to play basketball professionally and you didn’t really want to have a boring 9-5 either so you chose to be an influencer.
you both supported each other and both of you became very successful in what you did. eren signing with a good team and you having nearly up to a million followers. you made sure to go to every one of his games and he would be sure to mention you on his socials and even point to you at games.
the two of you even had a child together who both of your fans adored. you had him early in both of your careers and had enough money to support him growing up, the two of you thought that you would be able to live the rest of your lives as a family.
that was until about 4 years later when eren’s schedule became to hectic and he spent more time practicing and being out of the country for games to even be home with you, there was a gradual build up to that which you thought you could get through but in the end you realised it was too much for you and he accepted that.
in the end the both of you decided to spilt apart as is was just too much on you. both of your fan bases were sad to see their favourite couple break apart but you assured them that it was mutual and the two of you ended on good terms, deep down you still loved him but you let him go knowing it was for the better.
eren always made sure to send money to support both him and you even though you told him that he didnt need to send you money as well. he also did regular calls to check in to see how the both of you were doing, and when he was back in the country he made sure to see you if he could spending time with his son and even you.
you know he loved his son from the way he would always get souvenirs from countries when he was out and even got some jerseys from his sons favourite players even if he did pout complaining because he wasn’t his favourite.
this went on for about a year and it worked really well for the three of you, your sons fifth birthday passed with eren doing his all to be there buying him an expensive gift that your son absolutely loved. eren had lately had been spending more time over due to the season, there not being a lot of games and you decided you wanted to go out since it had been a while.
eren has said he would take care of your son while you went out with your friends saying that you deserved the time to have fun. he took your son over to his house so that you could get ready in peace telling you he would keep him for the weekend so you could relax.
once the both of them had left the house you called both sasha and mikasa telling them the plans and they decided to come over to help you get ready. they arrived soon with their things and the three of you started to get ready.
you had your hair and make up done all that was left was your outfit. you had no idea what to wear as it had been a long time since you had gotten dressed up like this, the girls made their way to you closet and started picking through your stuff looking for something for you to wear.
being pregnant had made big changes to you body which left you feeling less than confident after your giving birth but as the years went by some changes left and some stayed. for one your tits and ass filled out as well as you hips getting wider giving you a near hourglass figure.
you were pretty self conscious about your body but everyone around you encouraged you to embrace your new body as they said it made you look sexy and you believed them, looking at yourself differently you loved your new self.
the girls had picked out a dress you don’t even remember buying. a long-sleeve red dress that stopped just under you ass with red cross slits trailing down the side exposing some skin. you paired it with a classic set of black heels and a red bag to match.
the other two were also ready when you had finished getting dressed so you made sure you had everything you needed and sasha drove you to the club blasting music all the way there.
you got into the flub with no problem all of you being over the required age and the three of you went to get drinks to start your night off, weaving your way through the bustling crowd and over to the bar where you all order your first round of drinks keeping you tab open just in case you want to get more.
you and mikasa take a few more shots sasha only having a few being your designated driver for the night not that she really needed any as she would be asked to have just as much fun either way. after you finished your drinks the three of you moved over into the dancing crowd losing yourselves to the music.
you swung your body to the beat of the music sasha in front and mikasa behind you, your as shaking with every sway of your hips. you could tell that many men wanted to join you but you could see both of the girls pushing the away as they know about your lingering feelings for eren.
the song changes and you recognise it as ‘mad at me by sexxy red’ realising that you know the lyrics and you start singing it along with the others in the room, knowing it lyric for lyric shaking your ass to the beat people around you dancing to the music.
when the next line come on you shout it out like there's no tomorrow “fuck me like you mad at me baby, I need a freak to drive me crazy!” and you sing the rest of the song with the same passion until it finishes and you’re out of breath.
the next song plays and you feel all the energy you had from before now depleted and decide to go pay for your last drink of the night leaving sasha and mikasa on the dance floor.
it didn’t take long for you to reach the bar and pay but on your way back to the girls some one stopped you trying to pull you for a dance. but you quickly pushed them away not in the mood walking to your friends even faster.
you get to the girls in record speed in no time though all the remaining energy you had no completed, the girls notice this and decide it’s time for you all to go home.
you drip mikasa home first knowing she has to go to bed for work in the morning. and then sahsa takes you back to your house with you dozing off on the way back. you didn’t even realise that you had faleen asleep until you felt sasha gently shake you awake.
thanking her for the ride home you wish her a safe journey back walking up to your front door, stumbling on the short walk due to the alcohol still flowing in your system. checking the time to see that it was almost past midnight and you know that your son should have gone to bed ages ago feeling bad that you couldn’t tell him goodnight.
when you walk in it takes a while for your eyes to adjust to the light which you were sure you turned off when you left, squinting only to see a figure sitting on the couch. you take off your heels setting them to the side and look up to see the figure still there.
once your eyes get accustomed to the light you realise that’s it’s eren sitting there who has been sitting there staring up at you since you walked in, and you think maybe you’re just hallucinating from the alcohol in your system but upon further inspection you realise that he’s actually there.
“eren? what are you doing here? where’s my baby?”
for a second he doesn’t say anything and just eyes you up but then he speaks up.
“c’mere here baby”
the space between you brows crease at the pet name but you move towards him nonetheless, coming to stand up in from of him looking down at him.
“I dropped him off at my mums place, don’t worry about him for now”
he gently pulls you down to straddle you making your dress ride up a little bit, leaving the two of you face to face. you don’t instantly question his actions but your face conveys your confusion, but instead of saying anything he just sits there rubbing slowly up and down your thighs spread over him.
“what’s going on, is something wrong?”
but instead of answering your question he laughs and pulls out his phone swiping though as if looking for something.
“how about you tell me what this is about first”
you’re confused at first but then once the video starts playing your eyes widen in shock. it’s a video of you in the club singing to “mad at me” shouting the lyrics to the song.
“wanna explain this to me”
he’s still smiling as he says it and you know there's no way to get out of this. there's no possible excuse he would believe after seeing that, which brings up the question of where he got it from.
“who took this video and how do you have it”
he turns off his phone slipping it back into his joggers the action causing you to shift in too of him, your hands coming to rest on his shoulders as to not fall off him.
“it was posted online and someone sent it to me, and don't try change the subject. what’s this about you wanting to fuck. if you wanted some dick all you had to do was say so princess. you know i never say no to you baby”
in truth it had been a while since you were active, though it was mainly because of your lack of time due to taking care of you son as well as working.
part of it had to do with the fact that no dock would be able to compare to eren's. the way he would fuck you was to good for you to ever try it with anyone else.
you had kind of missed this intimate part of your relationship, you knew eren wasn’t the type of guy to sleep around and you are sure if he did you would have found out by now and you didn’t want to seem to desperate by asking him about his life without you as you respected his privacy as he did yours.
“why you silent for pretty, aint got nothing to say or did you really mean what you said. what was it again, you wanted me to fuck you like I was mad at you cause I can do that baby if it’s what you want, do you want that?”
as you contemplate your answer you notice his hands don’t stop but smile drops a serious look falls over his face. he probably knows that your drunk and no os giving you a way out of this.
knowing him if you said no he would step back and act as if it didn’t happen. the thing is that you do want this to happen, maybe it’s the alcohol or the fact that you’re just really pent up and horny but you don’t see a reason to decline his offer.
you nod your head to agree but he doesn’t seem satisfied with that hands stopping to grip at your thighs squeezing them lightly.
“no princess, I need words. you say yes we continue. say no and I’ll take you to bed and go back home, answer me properly”
knowing this is your last chance to back out you appreciate his efforts in order to confirm your consent and it just gives you even more reason to say yes, knowing that he’s being respectful even though he couldn’t have done what he wanted knowing you have no way of defending yourself in this state.
“yes eren, I want this. I want you. fuck me please, i need you“
you hardly have time to register what’s happening before he’s lifting you up and making his way to your old shared bedroom. you wrap you legs around his firm torso and cling onto him tighter, even though you know that there no way he will drop you.
“only since you asked me so nicely, I’ll give you what you need don’t worry baby”
the two of you reach the bed room in record speed and eren gently sets you down on the edge of the bed kneeling down in front of you both of his hands still on the side of your thighs looking up at you with a mischievous grin.
his mouth latches onto you barely clothed sex sucking on your clit in a way that has you gasping out in ecstasy. it’s no lie to say that eren knows every inch of your body inside and out. he knows all the things that make you squirm and scream. where to touch and lick as well as h to e spots indie you that make your arch into his touch.
he moves on from sucking on your clit like a mad man thirsting for water and moves down to you dripping whole, sinking his tongue into your tight heat that hadn’t had any attention for a while. not that there weren’t a few visits from your bullet vibrator it just couldn’t make you cum the way you did when eren would fuck you.
“fuck, she really missed me didn’t she ma?”
the way he’s talking to your pussy has you rolling your eyes, but they then roll for a different reason as he adds one finger teasing his way inside of you alongside his hot tongue. “oh fuck, ‘ren don’t stop please” your hand reaches for his head gripping his hair causing it to fall loose as you pull his face further into your cunt.
both his tongue and fingers pistoling into you at a harsh pace so he not surprised when you end up cumming into his mouth as he starts to suck on your clit. he doesn’t stop scissoring his fingers inside you until you stop cumming and your moans die out, though your legs still tremble slightly due to the force of your orgasm.
“we aint done yet princess, you said you wanted to be fucked right and that’s what you’ll get. flip over”
you may be a bit drunk but that doesn’t stop you from turning over at the speed of light making you a bit lightheaded but you do regret it as you miss when eren pulls of his top and steps out his trousers and boxers, kneeling back behind you slapping his cock against your ass cheeks.
“you ready for me baby?”
he watches as you nod your head eagerly and lines his cock up with your pussy sliding in with predicted ease, filling out all the way to the hilt. both of you let out moans of pleasure “fuck- I missed you” you’re not sure if he’s talking to you or your pussy but you’re to full and stretched out to care. it would be an understatement to say that you also missed the fill of his cock. it was more like the longer you were apart the more you craved to feel him.
he was feeling sympathetic knowing that it had been a while since you had fuck him, or anyone for that matter, but when you start to rock back into him letting out small mewls of pleasure he decides not to hold back. “such a desperate whore, you cant wait to fuck yourself on my cock huh?” his words are accompanied by a hard slap to your ass causing your movements to stagger with a loud moan of “f-fuck, you’re taking too long”
he lets you move as you please for a few more moments before growing impatient and gripping your waist slamming his hips into yours. “d-daddy- fuckk!” you cant see it but you can hear the smirk as he says “you like it when daddy fucks you like this don’t you?” as he sends another harsh thrust you way, rocking the bed with the force of his thrust.
he continues with his timely thrust with the occasional slap to your ass, oscillating between that or squeezing it in both hands and playing with the fat. he can feel the way you clam down on him when he does that, knowing your body inside and out plays well in is favour, not so much in yours.
he spares no energy with is thrusts as he knows you like it when he's rough with you, fucking you into the soft sheets wit vigour, deep strokes hitting your cervix every time, the tip brushing against your sweet spot on every quick roll of his hips.
he's not surprised when he begins to hear your familiar slurred pleas of " daddy please. 's too much. slow down" to which he does the opposite and uses one and to steady your waist and the other one to hold your neck keeping your back arced "remember, you asked for this princess," your unable to move, sheets bunched up in your hands, hips held high by him, face pressed into the bed.
"made it loud and clear waat you wanted and now im giving it to you"
the slick sounds of sex circulate the room, your nonsensical moans bouncing off the walls in the room along with his skin slapping against yours as he hammers is cock into your dripping pussy. "since you asked for it m sure you can take it like a good girl cant you? noting you havent done before"
you can feel is cock start to pulse inside you and you know that he's close , and you're on the verge of release, with the way eren's pounding into you you doubt you'll be able to last much longer as well as the fact that its been ages since your last fuck, which was eren.
"next time you want something, just fucking ask"
the last three words of his sentence are each punctuated with a harsh trust, sending you over the edge as you begin to squirt all over is cock and onto the sheets below you. he can feel the way your pussy spasms around is cock as he fucks you through your orgasm, slowing down to ease you through it.
"that's it cum on daddy's cock, its all fucking yours baby, nobody can have me but you"
its only a couple more languid trusts until he's spilling is hot seed inside you with a groan of your name on his lips, hips stuttering as his grip tightens enough in a way you're sure will leave marks in the morning, body doubling over your trembling frame while he locks his hips with yours, emptying is tick load deep into your pussy.
only wen he's sure that there's no more does e finally pull out of your near limp body and gently rolls you over onto your back. peppering kisses down your torso till he settles between your legs were he begins to suck the cum out of you, causing your legs to clam around is head.
"nononono- fuck. i cant, s too much no more."
he's relentless not stopping even as your and tug at his air, pushing is tongue deep into your pussy and licking your mixed juices out of you. "just one more baby, i know you can give it to me" he's not wrong as only a second after he presses his thumb to your clit, you're cumming for the third time that evening shaking in is hold.
after tat e makes sure to clean you out as best as he can, dressing you into comfortable clothes. after cleaning himself he carries you to the guest bedroom and tucks you in deciding to leave until you reach out to him pulling him back.
he ends up wit is arms wrapped around you and your head tucked underneath is, drifting into a deep sleep. you're sure that in the morning the two of you will have a lot of things to talk about.
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𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
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| I just want attention! |
Toji Fushiguro x Wife!Reader (Requested!)
Asking Toji for a divorce.
Word Count: 1.5k
CW: SFW, domestic mostly fluff and some angst, happy ending.
A/n: TYSM to the anon who requested! I'm not very experienced with writing angsty stuff so if it's bad my apologies. (Also tag: @chilichopsticks)
From the moment you met Toji, he was nothing but a gentleman to you. Maybe that was why you fell so hard and so quickly, so that when he was on one knee with a ring you didn’t hesitate at all after only a few months of being together. 
He always swept you off your feet, when you got off work he picked you up and took you wherever you wanted to go. He always tried to make you happy and spend as much time with you as possible, buying you flowers when you got a promotion and taking you to an early screening of a movie from your favorite franchise, were only a few of the many things he would do often for you.
All he asked for in return, was for you to accept him, faults and all. He had made mistakes in the past, and still worked as an assassin, which was the only job he felt he was well suited for. With you in mind, he quit his gambling habit. After so many loses he finally got some sense knocked into him and decided to saved up his money, so that the moment the two of you tied the knot you wouldn’t have to work at all. 
To most, Toji was seen as arrogant, if not invisible since he kept to himself, something that you never understood. On the day of your wedding, you were picked up in his arms and carried directly to the car, where he drove the two of you to your honeymoon destination right after the ceremony and fuss was over. Two weeks of hot springs and relaxing in a small town awaited you, where your husband doted on you more than ever. Every morning you awoke to a sweet kiss on your forehead, and warm arms engulfing you, making you wish you could sleep forever in the comfort of his protection.
You made sure to snap plenty of shots of walking around to the different shrines and temples, and your husband wearing a yukata which he realized he was rather fond of. By the end of your trip you were more in love with him than ever, and even more ready to embrace a wonderful life as his wife in your new home. 
Somewhere in your heart you knew that feeling might not last forever, the butterflies you got every time Toji was around you. But everyone always said the honeymoon phase lasted at least a few months… not the length of the actual honeymoon. Nothing your family and friends had said about marriage prepared you for this reality, that the fade to normal life would be so sharp.
By the time the two of you got back to the house, your husband was already heading right back to work as usual. You kept yourself busy with unpacking all the boxes and setting things up around the house, but in a way that only made getting used to a routine harder. Toji didn’t come back for four days, being on a job he got unexpectedly. 
His quick call barely did anything to calm your nerves. He was always so careful about telling you about his work before the two of you were married, trying not to worry you. Of course you knew Toji was strong, and you tried not to doubt him, but you could barely sleep from thinking about it. Now living with him you could feel his absence by the empty side of the bed and the single plate of food on the dining room table. 
As soon as he was back, you were overjoyed by his presence, almost thinking that feeling you were missing had returned. But, it wasn’t for long. No matter how many hobbies you took up at home, or how many friends you made in your new neighborhood, the absence of your husband would always bother you. When he was right in front of you, he was still the gentleman you always remembered, who you loved with every ounce of your being. But when he was away, you couldn’t help but wonder if he thought about you as much as you did about him. If he even missed you, he was gone so often for his assignments. As weeks turned to months, it blurred into routine and so did the wall that started to grow between the two of you.
That day, you had finally had enough. After contemplating it in your head for a few weeks, you realized that the two of you were still relatively new into your marriage, and you could still probably get your job back even if things changed. Of course you still loved him, and you couldn’t imagine your life without him, but right now, that was almost what you were living. He got less and less affectionate every time he came home, and it was too stressful to have to worry every day that he got home safe in a job that you didn’t fully understand, as he couldn’t tell you much for your own safety.
You had promised him you would stay by his side for anything, but he had done the same for you. And right now, neither of you were anywhere near each other. Toji had no idea you had taken up watching the neighbor’s kid after school some days, or that you baked a fresh loaf of bread at the start of every week, something he was never there to try. You didn’t know where he was or sometimes for how long, not getting much more than a promise that he’d come home safe. 
“Smells good, what’d you make?” Toji inhaled deeply as he walked into the house. For the first time in your marriage he was home on a Monday, bread making day. “It’ll be ready soon,” you referred to the loaf sitting on a cooling rack. You forwent the normal welcome, though you did it so rarely that it seemed to go unnoticed. Making a cup of coffee to go with a slice of the bread, you shifted you feet uncomfortably, making Toji watch your movements carefully. “Thanks,” he muttered, grabbing the bread off the plate while you sat down in front of him. 
The two of you sat in silence. Starting it off with that question felt far too daunting. “Y’know what, I was thinking we should take a vacation,” he started, “for a week or two.” You lifted your head up to look at him. “Haven’t done that in awhile, huh,” he groaned, hand rubbing his neck at your bland expression. 
He dropped his hand and sat up straight when he saw your face change. Your eyes, usually so cheerful and lovely, looked only of pain as they flooded with tears. “Toji, you know that I love you, I…” he watched you carefully as you spoke. “I… just can’t do it anymore,” you started to breath deeply, turning away to avoid your husband’s eyes. 
Toji grabbed your hand softly, encouraging you to squeeze it back as he listened. “I love you too, okay? Just talk to me,” he muttered, trying to decrease the tension though he knew in his gut what you were going to say. Clearly it had been on your mind for a while, you just wanted to get it over with. “I miss you, a lot, but I know you’ve got your work and everything,” you grasped his fingers, pressing into them lightly. “But I just don’t know what I’m doing here, aside from worrying about you. I’m not even doing anything for you.”
Tears flooded down your cheeks as Toji reached up to wipe them away with his thumb. “Maybe we just shouldn’t be together,” as much as he was prepared for your words, they still hit him like a ton of bricks. If only he could express how special every moment the two of you had together was to him, and how excited he was to make new ones. “I love you, okay? I didn’t marry you for nothin’, remember that.” 
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, “I don’t want to be without you, but my work takes me away a lot.” Toji frowned, realizing your apprehension to fall into his arms was something he should have noticed beforehand. “I’ll quit, I’m serious. I just want you to be happy, okay? I don’t want to get divorced.”
“It’s not just that, it’s-” he tucked you into his chest. “You’re right, just calm down and we can talk about it,” you nodded against the fabric of his shirt. “I just want some attention, it’s like we don’t even know each other sometimes,” you whined, wrapping your arms around him as well. He smiled as you brought your head out, face dry of tears but still a bit pink. “I want to learn everything about you, yeah? Like how’d you get so good at baking…” he bit off a chunk of bread, now room temperature and slathered in butter. 
“This isn’t the time for joking, I just told you I wanted to get divorced,” you sulked as Toji laughed. “I’m just glad you changed your mind,” he let out a sigh of relief. “I still want to talk about this, but let’s leave it off for a bit,” he held you tighter, “I’d rather relax before I have to tell Shiu I’m quitting…”
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mysteryshoptls · 3 days
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SSR Ruggie Bucchi - Platinum Jacket Vignette
"Happy 100th Anniversary"
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[Land of Dawning – National Museum of Art]
Ruggie: Can't believe I'm here bein' a supporter for some museum like this. Guess ya never know what life's got in store for ya.
Ruggie: I mean, I totally wouldn't've ever paid to see paintings that I can't even fill my belly with…
Ruggie: But I guess it's okay if I don't gotta pay. I wonder if they got paintings I've seen in my textbooks.
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???: This painting… These are the hyenas from the King of Beast's legends. When the three of them are lined up like this it's kind of intimidating…
Ruggie: Well, yeah, they were out there patrollin' lava quarries 'n goin' out on scoutin' missions, so.
Trey: You sure know your stuff, Ruggie. I guess that would make sense for a hyena beastman to know.
Trey: But still… Both patrolling and scouting seems like painstaking work.
Ruggie: Oh, yeah. From the stories I've heard, they had some pretty tight scrapes…
Ruggie: Like there's one where while they were out chasin' some stubborn foe, they ended up runnin' off a cliff tryin' to catch 'em…
Ruggie: Which had 'em endin' up flyin' into some real prickly thickets.
Trey: If it were me, I'd probably hesitate, worried about getting hurt. Guess the hyenas who worked under the King of Beasts were just that brave.
Ruggie: Brave? Then I guess I'll take that compliment, too. 'Cause I've jumped into thorny thickets like that a buncha times!
Trey: You've jumped into the thorny thickets…? A bunch of times!? Why would you do that…?
Ruggie: Actually, did you know? In the Sunset Savanna, there's this real steep cliff that's become a bit of a tourist attraction.
Ruggie: It's the perfect place to catch the settin' sun, so a ton of tourists go up there to snap a pic, leanin' over the fences 'n everything.
Ruggie: And like, sometimes there's folk that'll get so focused on settin' up the shot, or that'll bump into others that they'll drop and lose stuff.
Trey: I'd expect they'd have to let their stuff go if they dropped it off the cliff… But how does this all tie into you talking about the thorny thickets??
Ruggie: Sheeheehee. So actually, at the bottom of that cliff, there's a huge bramble of thorny thickets.
Ruggie: It's off-limits, and it's pretty dangerous, so no one really heads down there.
Ruggie: So, that's why I'd sneak down in the dead of night, and pick up all the lost items!
Ruggie: Sometimes I'd find little wrapped pieces of candy, watches 'n accessories, and even wallets!
Ruggie: Well, it kinda depended week to week what dropped, but… That was a great way to make some quick cash.
Trey: B-But if you had gotten injured, would all that have been worth it?
Ruggie: Yeah, true. Back when I was just a kid, I could slip in 'n out pretty easily, but I had to stop when I started getting' bigger.
Ruggie: Not only was I makin' big bucks, but the cliff's environment was getting' kept clean. Felt like a win-win deal to me.
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[Land of Dawning – National Museum of Art]
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Ruggie: Oh, this one… It's a painting of the thunder god and his son.
Trey: Yeah, according to the legends, he came to the human world just after being born, and was raised by adoptive parents.
Ruggie: Basically, that means he was raised apart from his actual dad, right? Amazin' they actually look like they get along good.
Trey: Haha… I wonder. Do you get along with your dad, Ruggie?
Ruggie: Nah, I don't got one.
Ruggie: He left back when I was a kid, so I don't remember anythin' about him, 'n I don't know what he's up to now.
Trey: Oh… Is that so? Sorry, I didn't mean to overstep my bounds.
Ruggie: Huh, that reaction's pretty different than what I'm used to.
Ruggie: Back home, there's a ton of kids just like me, so usually they'd just shrug and go, "Oh, okay" and move on.
Trey: And I guess it doesn't sound like they're saying that just to be considerate.
Ruggie: Obviously. Because the bigger problem is not havin' the money to buy food!
Ruggie: Granny'd take care of me, but there wasn't much we could do 'bout our empty bellies…
Ruggie: When I was big enough, I'd start working together with all the kids in my little neighborhood to scrounge up some food.
Trey: Kids running around trying to gather food on their own… That's hard for me to imagine.
Ruggie: There's a buncha ways to gather up food. We'd go into town and ask for alms, or drop a line in the river.
Ruggie: We were always pretty hungry, so we'd pretty much do anything… Oh, like we had a great time once digging for potatoes.
Trey: Is digging up potatoes that exciting?
Ruggie: WELL, YEAH!
Ruggie: There's actually a type of potato that grows in my country that can get as large as 20 kilos…
Ruggie: Around the time the potato harvestin' was finishin' up, we all snuck into the fields at night…
Ruggie: And we'd pick up some stunted potatoes that were left behind, as well as dug up some other forgotten potatoes.
Ruggie: We were all up in arms to pick every single one before the sun rose!
Trey: Why'd you go at mid… Never mind, I'm not going to ask.
Ruggie: And then, this one year when I was diggin', I hit the jackpot!
Ruggie: It was a potato so huge I wouldn't've even been able to carry it with both arms! It had't've been heavier than 20 kilos~
Ruggie: Didn't think there'd be any potatoes left that huge… Maan, I really lucked out then.
Trey: 20 kilograms, huh… With something that big, I don't think there'd be much to worry about eating for a while.
Ruggie: Don'tcha think?
Ruggie: I was thinkin', like, we could dry whatever was leftover and turn it to powder to make it last a bit longer…
Ruggie: But then Granny ended up boilin' 'em, fryin' 'em, and basically makin' a ton of dishes. It was a potato party extravaganza!
Ruggie: Me and the other street kiddos were just packin' 'em away, and little by little it started to disappear…
Ruggie: In the end, I couldn't make anything to save it for later.
Trey: Ah… That's rough.
Ruggie: And I never saw a potato that huge ever again. Guess good luck like that only ever hits once in a while.
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[Land of Dawning – National Museum of Art]
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Trey: Woah… This painting has a real powerful presence.
Ruggie: So, this is a painting of when the Thorn Fairy transformed into a dragon to fight, huh.
Trey: She looks way stronger than what her stories say. I bet I would be no match for her.
Ruggie: Eh!? Trey-san, you lookin' to pick a fight with the Thorn Fairy? It'd be waaay better to try 'n flatter her instead
Trey: Oho, but that might be the scarier route, don't you think? You might end up in deep trouble if you were to offend the Thorn Fairy instead.
Ruggie: Sheeheehee. Oh, but I'm pretty good with that kinda stuff.
Trey: Haha, well, I guess I have to admire that pluck.
Ruggie: But man, she's really something. She's the one that caused all that lightning too, right?
Ruggie: They say it was always thunderin' and lightnin' outside her castle as a way to keep intruders out… That's a huge undertakin', huh.
Ruggie: But with all those lightning strikes, I bet the bread prices were super cheap near the Thorn Fairy's castle.
Trey: Bread? …Ohh, right! Because when lightning strikes, certain particles are released in the air that helps plants grow.
Ruggie: Huh? Wait, are ya sayin' there's actually a whole science behind the whole "bread gets cheaper whenever it thunders"!?
Trey: Oh, isn't that what you meant?
Ruggie: I was just sayin' what Granny would always say…
Ruggie: Wait, so does that sayin' mean that 'cause more wheat gets harvested, more bread can get made, and that's why it's cheaper?
Trey: Yeah. Although, with how much we've developed our fertilizers nowadays, I don't know how much lightning strikes actually play a part anymore.
Ruggie: Cooool, I had no idea. Guess you Science Club folk know your stuff.
Ruggie: I bet Granny didn't really know the meanin' behind it like you did…
Ruggie: But I bet she saw with her own eyes the change in bread prices whenever there were tons of thunder and lightning.
Ruggie: But still… Kinda weird, huh. Sheeheehee.
Trey: Weird? What is?
Ruggie: Back when I was a kid, I only ever cared 'bout food, so there's no way I woulda been interested in learnin' why the bread was cheaper.
Ruggie: But now, I heard your whole spiel, and my reaction was to think it was pretty cool. Guess I'm maturin'.
Trey: Well… Maybe it's just that you can actually afford to take the time to listen now?
Ruggie: Maybe, maybe not. 'Cause my wallet's still pretty empty…
Ruggie: Oh hey, maybe this is just me bein' able to relax my stresses away, huh!? …Maybe not, heh.
Trey: Could be, if you're enjoying your time here, at least. Oops… Look at the time.
Trey: I think I'll head out to go check on how my dormmates are doing. See you, Ruggie.
Ruggie: 'Kaay, see ya. I'm gonna keep lookin' around this area a bit longer.
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Ruggie: Hm? This painting… A lion cub's just lollygaggin' with a warthog 'n a meerkat.
Ruggie: I'm wonderin' if they even know all the scary things that can happen to animals that step outta their territory, hm?
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Requested by Anonymous.
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neteyamsmoon · 3 days
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Welcome to vegas, baby
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~ Summary : You heard Las Vegas is an amazing city so why not get a trip to it? You also heard there live hot guys only, but didn't expect one to take care of you.
~ Warnings : moderu au teyam, human reader, fingering, physic insecurity (reader), masturbating (nete<3)
~ Word count : 1.9k+
~ Translations : tìyawn - my love
~ Author's note : This was so rushed and idk if there even is a plot 🙏 forgive me!! Neteyam pic belongs to sullytey on tiktok and divider to @cafekitsune
ꨄ︎
Welcome to vegas baby
I want you come and pay me
Give me the money, give me diamonds, give me rubies baby
Give me a best trip
I wanna go shoppin'
Get on your knees and beg me please to let you in me
"Vegas" (I wanna ride) by Joseline Hernandez
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"Hey there, sweetling!" Neteyam shouted in direction over the loud music that was buzzing in your ears. You turned your head towards the voice, not knowing the owner of it was actually talking to you.
Neteyam smirked when you looked around, desperately searching for the one who called. He made his way through humans and na'vi, finally passing by to you. He didn't come to you just yet, he didn't want to seem a creep.
Instead, he ordered you another drink, just like the one you were close to finishing. After you swallowed the last drop of the sweet pink liquid in your glass, the bartender brought another one your way. You didn't expect a new drink, possibly free. Maybe he wanted to get under your skin but he was also na'vi.
Las Vegas is a place for everybody, na'vi or human. But this place is more populated by na'vi cause now tell me who, as a human, would be in their right mind to live here. Exactly! Nobody. Here the na'vi's are hot, well built and simply sexy. That's why most of them were single, nobody could get to them.
You straightened your back and when the bartender passed by, you stopped him.
"Excuse me!"
The bartender stopped in his tracks and turned around to you, leaning forward and supporting his weight with his arms by the counter.
"I didn't order this-" "I know. Someone ordered it for you." your eyes widened as you took in his words. You couldn't think of someone who would actually buy you a drink for nothing.
You nodded slowly, quietly muttering an 'okay' as he left. Though, who were you to say no to a free drink? You looked around one more time before you picked up the glass, bringing it to your lips and letting the pink colored fluid go down your throat as you savoured its sweet taste.
From afar, Neteyam was stroking himself, thinking of how your hands would feel around him. He couldn't help but stroke his cock faster, feeling himself getting closer, the simple thought of you pleasuring him only adding fire to his fuel.
He closed his eyes, biting his bottom lip to prevent his moans from getting heard. Neteyam came all over his hand, drowning it in his sticky seed. He brought his hand up to his face, watching his cum stick to his fingers. Whenever he tried parting them, he saw how they were connected by a thin line of cum.
"Fuck" he muttered, quickly zipping up his jeans and going to the bathroom, keeping his dirty hand inside his jacket pocket. Entering the bathroom, he turned on the water and brought his hand closer, watching the mess on it disappear under the pressure.
As his hand was finally clean, he looked around for some napkins but there weren't any. He closed his eyes in frustration before he inhaled through his nose, letting out a breath through his mouth. With the other clean hand, he threw his shirt over his head and dried off his hand. Now that his shirt was wet, he didn't even bother bringing it with him anymore. Instead, he just threw it away in the bin as he looked at himself in the mirror.
Now as a young adult, he was good looking. Starting working up from 16 really did help him. Now, he looked magnificent. He had a God-like body with rock hard abs, a back so large that sometimes he had trouble passing through door frames, thick thighs, and huge arms. But his favorite part of his body was his chest. He could say he outgrew his own mother. Others said it was just genetics but Neteyam had massive pecs. If he ran, they bounced. If he jumped, they jiggled. Whatever he did, there was movement.
He flexed his arms in the mirror, watching his muscles bulge at his action. When suddenly, he turned his head to the side and saw you. You were standing there, with your phone lifted up almost at the level of your face. You've been taking pics of him since you misunderstood the toilet signs and accidentally entered the men's bathroom. Neteyam wasn't the one to back down, and neither were you.
"Like what you see?" he turned to you, flexing for your little phone to collect and keep. Now you couldn't ignore the wet patch that was forming on your underwear, your folds were already leaking with arousal and of course Neteyam could smell it. That's why he continued flexing just for you, letting his lips tug upwards and form a smirk on his handsome face.
As any other normal being, your eyes drifted to his ample chest. Now you were offended. He couldn't possibly have them bigger than you... could he?
"What? Are you jealous I got bigger tits than you?" Neteyam joked, letting his arms fall to his sides as he eyed you, his piercing yellow eyes mixing with your different ones.
You scoffed and rolled your eyes at his words, quickly moving your gaze somewhere else, allowing it to wander anywhere but him.
"Don't have to be mad-" "At least I have nipples."
Now it was your time to speak and to offend him. According to what the scientists told the world, na'vi don't have nipples. Or maybe just the females do because they have to feed their kids but men? Nuh uh.
You thought he was gonna flirt with you, be something like "then show me yours" but no. He had his head tilted to the side, smirking down at you as he crossed his arms over his chest, pressing his pectorals together to make you even madder than before.
"Do you want to see?"
Your eyes widened at his bold question, and your cheeks got a new shade of red. He just... he asked you to show his nipples to you, to prove to you that he has them too.
Because you're crazy and don't think rationally in these kinds of moments, you nodded frantically.
"Yes, yes. Show them to me."
He got on his knees in front of you and pulled you closer, his hand wrapping around your entire forearm.
While crouching, he was still taller than you so him pulling you so abruptly towards him made you crush into his chest. You could swear your eyes almost fell out when you saw his perfect pectorals bounce at the sudden movement. You swore yours never bounced like this, and you felt like crying because of that.
And as if he could sense that, he pulled you into his chest. Neteyam knew where your head would end, but pretended to not. Your head came right in between his pecs and you felt the warmth of his body enveloping you whole.
"Now, don't cry. Show me how much you love me." he gently pulled away from you and took one of his pecs in his hand, bringing you closer to it as he pointed his hard nipple towards your mouth.
Without thinking twice, you wrapped your lips around his waiting bud, sucking and twirling your tongue around it. Neteyam moaned and threw his head back, his hand coming to tangle in your hair at the back of your head, guiding your movements but also holding you there. He was gentle with you as you were with him, but what would happen if you weren't?
Out of curiosity, you slowly bit down on his nipple. Neteyam's grip on your hair tightened and you were abruptly pulled away. There was a thin line of saliva connecting your lips and his nipple.
"You want to play dirty, tìyawn? Fine. I can play dirty too." Neteyam stood up, lifting you up to his chest as he did so. He walked over to the sink and placed you on the edge, making you part your legs so he can make room for his. One hand lingered on your nape as with the other one he held you by your chin. He looked at you in the eyes, his now intimidating gaze making you feel smaller than before.
"Look at you..." he whispered, "...such a tiny little thing, with such a dirty mind." you wanted to get mad at him and shut his mouth but the way he was talking, the way he was holding you, it was just too much. And it felt too good.
He leaned forward, his face just inches from yours. You could feel his warm breath caress your face as your eyes fell on his lips, so untouched and dying for any kind of attention. You wanted to dance with his lips, you wanted to fight with his tongue and in the end, you wanted to be there for him. Forever and always.
Neteyam was looking down at you with such adoration in his eyes, like he saw Eywa herself. His pupils were widely dilated till there was no gold left and his tail was swaying slowly from left to right, every now and then brushing against your leg.
You took the initiative and crushed your lips against his blue ones. You thought you had an advantage and could dominate him by kissing. But when his large hands engulfed your waist and squeezed your flesh, you felt dizzy. The world was spinning around you as his tongue fought against yours, seeking for dominance. You could tell he was a big dom.
When you finally gave in and let yourself be dominated by him, you felt one of his thick fingers slip inside you. You moaned into the kiss and could feel the smirk on his lips. He allowed you to pull away and you took a deep breath, refilling your aching lungs.
"Feels good, hm?" he smirked down at you, bent down to ghost his spit slicked lips right above your ears, sending a shiver down your spine.
You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer as he pumped his long finger in and out of you, asking for more. You arched into his touch, now chests pressed against one another as your breath came heavy, mouth struggling to stay closed as soft mewls left your lips.
"I-I'm close..." your voice was music to Neteyam's ears. Nodding his head, he resumed thrusting his finger in and out of you, feeling your tight walls accommodate the size of his digit.
"Come on, let go. Cum for me. Cum on me."
You could feel yourself getting closer, and more vulnerable. From the independent woman that travelled all alone to Las Vegas, you turned into a little whore, needy for the attention of a man twice your height who could keep you down with one hand.
A loud moan escaped your lips as you painted his hand in your juices, walls clenching around him. Neteyam pulled out his finger and brought it to his lips, sucking and licking your aroma off of it.
"That was... the best I ever experienced." you let out a breathless laugh, looking around you and searching for a way to get down from the sink.
Out of nowhere, two large hands wrapped around your waist and hoisted you up in the air, before lowering you back on the ground. Neteyam smiled down at you and leaned in closer, placing a kiss on the crown of your head.
"You should stay for a while. We could get to know each other better, you know?"
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Unpopular opinion (maybe): Luke's ultimatum at the end of Season 3 inadvertently reinforced Jess's choices that stopped him from finishing high school in the first place.
Disclaimer: The intent here isn't to attack Luke for how he handled things. The overall effect of Luke's presence in Jess's life is undoubtedly positive and instrumental to where Jess ended up. Luke was put in an unfair position that he wasn't prepared for, he genuinely cared and tried his best with the knowledge he had, and it would have been well within his rights to say no to Liz to begin with or to Jess when he came back after the car accident.
From what Jess tells Rory in "Teach Me Tonight," it sounds like he never had much academic support from adults, which is of course why Rory's belief in him will end up meaning so much. Details about Jess's childhood that are revealed once Liz is around suggest that Jess didn't have trustworthy adults in his life and had to learn how to be self-sufficient early. Even though we as the audience can see that Luke is responsible and trustworthy through his own actions and his relationships with people who have known him for many years, Jess doesn't have the same history with him, and it can take a long, long time to unlearn those survival instincts. Additionally, Jess's Walmart manager, as gregarious and pro-corporate as he seems to be, doesn't appear to engage in the practice of pressuring introverts to socialize (which happened to Rory at Chilton) and allows Jess to do something constructive and work toward a tangible reward. Some people get these benefits from going to school, but Jess didn't. Then there's a layer of youthful hubris here because Jess really did seem to think that he could manage all of this and go to school just enough to graduate based on what he tells Rory in S3 E17, Luke in S3 E18, and the principal in S3 E19. With of all this information in mind, it's really not surprising that Jess would prioritize work above school. His logic is self-destructive but understandable, and his fatal flaw ends up being that he committed to more responsibilities than a person could reasonably handle. This isn't the standard media portrayal of ditching school.
Luke's approach to being Jess's guardian is fairly hands-off. After Luke's "laying down the law" talk in the first episode Jess is in, the only requirement we see enforced is that Jess has to work at the diner, which Jess complies with. Luke didn't know Jess was working at Walmart at all until Jess bought his car, he didn't know Jess was eventually working more than full-time hours, and he didn't know Jess was missing as much school as he was. (This last one suggests a significant oversight at the school, which is another story.) When the extent of Jess's work hours is brought to his attention and Lorelai speculates about what is going on, he tells Lorelai that there is no way Jess would skip school and doesn't investigate further. When he realizes Jess is working some days instead of going to school, he offers to pay Jess more at the diner (and later steals his car) to prevent him from working at Walmart (the place he worked before he had a car to earn the money to buy it???) but doesn't press him about what is really going on.
So after all of that, it turns out Jess didn't go to school enough to graduate. Luke does give Jess the option to stay in Stars Hollow and keep going to school, but I could never blame someone for not being able to have a rational conversation immediately after a stranger randomly shows up, claims paternity, and runs out. The emotional damage of that incident really can't be divorced from what happens here. Luke is of course also in crisis mode. Jess didn't graduate because he worked too much, so now he's in a position where his consequence is to keep doing what got him into trouble, only this time he doesn't have anyone looking after him. This isn't what Luke is intending, but his ultimatum basically reinforces Jess's mindset of prioritizing work (i.e. short-term financial security) above school and his reluctance to trust other people, and it reinforces Jess's family history (ironically not including Luke) of abandoning difficult situations (in this case, the aftermath of the fight with Dean) and relationships (in this case, Rory) instead of facing them. Jess ends up on his own with the money he had from work that he was saving for a different car, so he probably thinks it's a good thing he worked as much as he did, and he ends up without adult guidance or restrictions to help him sort all this out and repair the harm he caused. This could have turned out much more darkly than it did, and it's really a miracle that Jess got to where he was by the time he was 21.
When Jess is with Jimmy in California, he acknowledges that he's failed and doesn't know where to go from there. It probably isn't outlandish to think that Jess was earning more as a full-time forklift driver than what he is earning during Season 4. Factoring in the lower cost of living in Stars Hollow or somewhere nearby compared to New York, he probably could have been able earn a decent living if he stayed at Walmart (even if he wouldn't have been better off in the long run). That's probably why Luke's "I'm sorry I didn't think driving a forklift for the rest of your life was good enough for you" stung. It was likely a much better situation than whatever Jess is in mid-Season 4.
In late Season 4, Jess seems resigned to where he is. He doesn't complain or blame anyone else for his circumstances, even when Luke repeatedly mocks him in New York. (Even mid-Season 4, Jess doesn't express anger toward Luke about anything other than Luke stealing his car until Luke provokes him multiple times.) Maybe Jess was already thinking about writing a book or studying for a GED during Season 4, but his posture and mannerisms seem to suggest defeat more than anything else. At this point, Jess might not be envisioning anything other than what he has. It is only after Luke accepts Jess for who he is, and stops seeing him as a failed project, ("You are who you are. I cannot change that, and I'm going to stop trying.") that Jess really starts to move forward. Although Luke isn't even very positive in how he says this, it's still the sort of affirmation Jess always needed and maybe never received from a family member before. Then, he's honest with Luke about his emotions, he's receptive to Luke's advice, he expresses appreciation for what Luke did for him, he offers Luke a way to stay in contact, and he makes a commitment to pay him back even though Luke says he doesn't have to do so. He tries (and fails, for the time being) to make amends with Rory, and after all of these things happen, he progresses into the version of himself that returns in Season 6. Jess pursues a path that Luke doesn't quite understand but has accepted and is proud of (it's also a path that Rory does understand and is proud of, and both forms of support are so important).
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luvyeni · 2 days
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The whole Hybe drama is crazy let me give you the details. I will say most of this is alleged, but it's what's being said right now.
She used to work with SM, and came under fire there for apparently having photos of naked women in her office and pushing young underaged idols into doing inappropriate photoshoots while there. After SM she got hired at Source Music, they hired her as a creative director, after this all the trainees were selected, this includes NewJeans members, boys that were on Iland, and others. These trainees were trained using Source Music's money, which during this she started Ador, also using Source Music's money. She then transferred the members of NewJeans she had at that point to Ador, along with many Source Music staff members. This basically made Source Music go broke, and the group they were going to debut fell through because of this. This is around when GFriend disbanded, it is not confirmed, but it is being rumored that her actions might have something to do with the disbandment, since at that point Source Music was a sinking ship, and it's possible they thought there was no way to survive with them. At this point, Hybe transferred Big Hit employees to Source Music, and started trying to find new trainees for the girl group. That's a big reason why Le Sserafim didn't have a really long training time, since they found already skilled trainees, and already had a concept and all worked out.
She claims that she saved NewJeans and that Hybe would have ignored them if she didn't move them to Ador. She says that Le Sserafim would have debuted and then basically any other girl group would have gotten crumbs from Hybe. She was apparently really mad that Hybe selected Sakura and Chaewon to be trainees without her input, and when Hybe said they would debut, she really didn't like that, and apparently openly spoke of her hate towards the girls since according to her trainees come to be in a 'Min Heejin girl group' not a Source Music girl group.
So coming to what's going on now Hybe is doing an audit into Ador, the sublabel that Heejin is the CEO of, they have asked her to leave the label, and are reporting her to the police. Apparently Heejin had a plan to take over the Ador label fully, she tried to make the management of Ador find ways to get Hybe to give up all their shares of Ador, so she could basically take the label over fully. She owns 20% of the label while Hybe has the other 80%. She apparently was trying to find outside investors to buy those shares, the outside investors were apparently foreign investment firms she had contacted regarding this plan. Hybe has evidence that she was planning to have someone buy out Hybe's shares of Ador, if they were willing to sell them, since she was apparently stupid enough to do all that with her work computer, which like pro tip if you wanna do something illegal don't use a work computer since your work has access to everything you do on it, they claim the document was called ESCAPE PLAN DO NOT TOUCH, like pro level thinking there.
She claims that Hybe copies all her ideas, like she says Illit it a copy of NewJeans, and has also said BTS, RIIZE, and TWS are copies of her ideas, which it's been brought up that some of NewJeans concept and all are copied/influenced from other artists too, so it's rich that she claims everyone copies her, but when she copies others it's okay. She was also planning with another person to form an attack on Hybe and Hybe's artists,; she also apparently had these people leaking Hybe artist and trainees personal information, health information, and leak things about other artist in the groups she claims copied her ideas, like there is no proof right now but it's being claimed that she could behind a lot of RIIZE leaks, since Seunghan was a Source Music trainee before he was a SM trainee. She even got the members of NewJeans parents involved, by having them claim they think these groups are copying NewJeans. Hybe asked her to resign and she said no, she came out saying she filed a whistleblowing report against Hybe months ago, claiming that Belift was copying Ador. She is claiming that Hybe has been mistreating and ignoring Ador and NewJeans. She claims they never responded her to her copying claims, but Hybe has the receipts that they both sent her an email response and physical response, which she claims she never got, but Hybe has the email read receipts. Over all, she is trying to basically split Ador from Hybe, without having any sort of contract penalties.
It's being said as of right now the girls of NewJeans are siding with Heejin, but no public announcement has been made. She has openly said the girls say they back her, but if they do side with her and leave with her, they will no longer be able to be NewJeans; Hybe owns the name NewJeans, so they would have to rebrand and after a scandal like this, there is probably no coming back from it. As of right now, the best thing for them to do would be distance themselves from her, and if it comes to it, side with Hybe. But nothing has officially been announced, and their comeback plans seem to be going forward as planned.
damn that is a lot, but it's a shame they're name dropping all these groups , because it taking attention away from this , cause i didn't know any of the illegal stuff they were doing, i only saw the drama with bang pd and mhj acting like teenagers over a concept and talking about other groups , they need to stop putting groups in the middle and focus on the important stuff.
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whoever wrote this. kissing you on the mouth
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stellarwaffles · 2 years
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You know those soulmate aus where if you write/draw something on your arm it’ll show up on your soulmate’s too?
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nobrakes · 1 year
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I always find it kind of funny when my friends or people in general say shit like: "oh, you have so many skills!" in regards to Things I Learned How To Do Myself Because I Never Had The Financial Possibility Of Paying For Other People To Do For Me.
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yuoic · 1 year
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#i’m really going through it right now but i can’t even afford therapy anymore bc even tho i’ve been applying for jobs since May#only one got back to me but they said they weren’t interested in hiring only seasonal even tho they said it was a good job for students#or temporary workers to pad their resumes after long gaps which i have bc after i had to leave my job to go to chicago for school i’ve been#unemployed and constantly applying for work w absolutely no responses for the last 2 years#which was easier when i was getting unemployment but i used all of that up a long time ago and i keep getting hit w weird charges whenever#i manage to save up any money and i keep being put in the negative in my account#and i tried to open a threadless store just to get SOME money ANY money but no one really bought anything so i've lost all motivation to#add designs bc it's a lot of effort for no reward and i can't think of what to add that would interest ppl in buying my stuff so i can get#pocket change essentially and i'm about to enter my final semester and i have to put together my bfa show at the end of it and i don't have#any money to create anything that's worth anything or that would be a good representation of my ability as an artist bc everything costs#money and i think i made a mistake deciding to go to art school instead of doing literally anything else but i don't have any other skills#and i now i'm wondering if all that time i spent cultivating art skills i should've been learning a vocation so i could actually have a#future and i hate all of my classmates bc they're getting gallery jobs or work in the field and i'm just trying to get trying to see if i#can get a host position at a shitty restaurant again bc i just need any sort of paycheck so that i can scrape by#my posts#.jpg
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so, if i tried to make little things to selle like scrunchies or soemthing (cause theyre easy and i have a lot of scrap fabric) would anybody buy them? simple clothing of some sort?
i really need help if anyone has any ideas, ive been unemployed since basically October and ODSP fucked me, i cant work but i cant get help from the government either because i cant take medication to 'prove' i should be on disability, but i really really need money
#im going to learn how to alter clothes but im in no shape right now to go in and learn#and im really kinda desperate at this point#i need fabric to make some summer clothes and its super costly#i need to make a fall coat before fall comes and i need to pick up soap and dish soap and medicated body wash#and groceries#my health is suffering because i cant eat much but i can eat what i bake but butter is seven bucks a pop so i cant bake#nor do i have a proper oven to bake bread#i need vitamin water cause i dont remember to take vitamins and supplements and what i do remember tastes like roadkill#and dont even ask me how much those cost#and all i actually want is to leave this province which my gramas having surgery on her leg so now my family wont be able to travel this#summer even though my mums be telling me for 5 years wed go to the coast for my birthday and we never do and im not able to go on my own#and i had been all set for tattoos before the pandemic and now i cant afford any of them and i dont think i can convince my old man to pay#for them cause he thinks im just lazy but i just wanna be pretty and everything i do backfires and ends up worse including my hair#and a piercing I've had for ten years#everything sucks and if the plan i have to get me to the coast happens i meed to pray the bank will give me a massive loan so i can#buy a place with three units so the rent would cover me because as i am now i dont know how to make any money#unless im able to get disability out there#and on top of that i finally have reached the point i need a cane and im so ashamed of this stupid body#that no one has ever loved and i dont have money enough to paint it or make it look fancy if i have to use it#i can barely walk i felt better today then made it three steps ar the store before i almost fell down again#i dont know what to do and i need advice on how to make some money when i cant do much and rn i just want to be outside anyway#all of this would be so much less stress if i just had my person but hes not here and i dont know how to meet him#and im so afraid i never will i dont want to pass another fucking year alone and untouched and not knowing what its like to be wantwd#and the more time passes the less my own family wants me and the worse my health gets amd no one cares#and i just want my person cause i know he always would and i dont know what to do but ache for him#and be afraid ill always be trapped in this shitty boring lonely life#but at least i meed money of nothing else to prevent running out before top surger and not affording it and also to get tattoos#im so tired and scared and no one ever knows how to help if they even want to#someone just see me and save me already#i dont want to be doted on or paid for i just want someone to see me and ask me to run away with them
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altruistic-meme · 2 years
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been a busy day ;;; and i am VERY tired but i have to stay up. its a Struggle.
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dumb-coward · 1 month
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Gonna just slam my head into a wall real quick
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pagesofkenna · 2 months
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i wanna buy the delicious dungeon extras book but knowing there's an updated version out in japan later this year, which means it might be translated to english next year, has me feeling like maybe i should wait...
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inkskinned · 9 months
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you're in the habit of denying yourself things.
if someone asked you directly, you would say that you love a little treat. you like iced coffee and getting the cookie. you drink juice out of a fancy cup sometimes, and often do use your candles until they gutter out helplessly.
but you hesitate about buying the 20 dollar hand mixer because, like. you could just use your arms. you weren't raised rich. you don't get to just spend the 20 dollars (remember when that could cover lunch?), at least - you don't spend that without agonizing over it first, trying to figure out the cost-benefits like you are defending yourself in front of a jury. yes, this rice cooker could seriously help you. but you do know how to make stovetop rice and it really isn't that hard. how many pies or brownies would you actually make, in order to make that hand mixer worthwhile?
what's wild is that if the money was for a friend, it would already be spent. you'd fork over 40 without blinking an eye, just to make them happy. the difference is that it's for you, so you need to justify it.
and it sneaks in. you ration yourself without meaning to - you don't finish the pint of ice cream, even though you want to. the next time you go to the store, you say ah, i really shouldn't, and then you walk away. you save little bits of your precious things - just in case. sometimes you even go so far as putting that one thing in your shopping cart. and then just leaving it there, because maybe-one-day, but not right now, there's other stuff going on.
you do self-care, of course. but you don't do it more than like, 3 days in a row. after that it just feels a little bit over-the-edge. like. you can't live in decadence, the economy is so bad right now, kid.
so you don't buy the rice cooker. you can-and-will spend the time over the stove. you can withstand the little sorrows. denial and discipline are practically synonyms. and you're not spoiled.
it's just - it's not always a rice cooker. sometimes it is a person or a job or a hug. sometimes it is asking for help. sometimes it is the summer and your college degree. sometimes it is looking down at scabbed knees and feeling a strange kind of falling, like you can't even recognize the girl you used to be. sometimes it is your handprint looking unsteady.
sometimes it is tuesday, and you didn't get fired, and you want to celebrate. but what is it you like, even? you search around your little heart and come up empty. you're so used to denying that all your desires draw a blank.
oh fuck. see, this is the perfect opportunity. if you had a mixer, you'd make a cake.
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