#idk it’s all just so fuckin sad like I can’t imagine what it was like pre-fb/insta when they just eventually ceased to Exist to u at all !!!
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Thinking about all the times in life u see someone familiar without knowing it’s the last time ur ever going to see them
#or even worse is the rare occasion when u do know and the moment is too heavy for u to think of anything adequate to say 🥹#even if it’s someone u only casually and occasionally talk to but ur both fond of each other#🥲🥲🥲🥲#I’m not even talking about death either like. just people u get to casually know#the dude who works in accounting. the girl who sat next to u in a class one semester. a high school friend u lose touch with.#or like. even if u stay connected via social media it’s still not the same#like connections that mean enough to u to make a minor impact but aren’t Big enough to warrant going out of u way to visit#idk it’s all just so fuckin sad like I can’t imagine what it was like pre-fb/insta when they just eventually ceased to Exist to u at all !!!
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⋆ SLEEPING ALONE? ⋆
headcanon ➫ BSD boys when they come home to find you sleeping with their clothes (ft. dazai, chuuya, akutagawa)
notes ➫ mostly gender neutral reader, 1 or 2 references to afab, some sex references
dazai
Dazai came home in the middle of the day because he got bored at work and he’s a fucking menace to society
You had spent the night and then stayed because you had the day off, were not expecting him to be home until later
(But honestly you should expect anything and everything from Dazai)
You had been picking up clothes that were thrown on the floor last night after some ~fun~
Picked up his button down and had this weird moment where you really missed him even though you just saw him, and he was coming home later
(You were probably about to start your period)
You laid back down with his shirt but accidentally fell asleep
(He kept you up very late)
Anyway, back to Dazai showing up
Evil laughs while he slips out his phone to take a pic that he would probably harass you with later
Re: menace to society
It does really warm his heart though, he absolutely adores you in every single way
He crouches down next to you and gently brushes your hair out of your face so he can press a little kiss to your forehead :”)
He jokes around and is a silly little man but truly no one has ever loved him as fiercely and deeply as you do
So he just sits next to you for a little bit, thinking abt this and how much he loves you back
He sighs before pulling back the covers and laying down with you, gathering you up all tight in his arms
You unconsciously toss the shirt to the side before fuckin bear hugging the poor man (still asleep, not much can wake you)
He sees you smile a little bit since you get to hug an actual Dazai :)
Realizes he absolutely cannot get up no matter what now, lest he disturb your slumber
Texts Kunikida that he can’t come back in for the day, puts his phone on DND because he knows its about to get absolutely blown up by the poor man who just wants to do his silly little job
Kisses your forehead a billion times before getting all comfy and falling asleep too :-)
⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳ ✦ ⊹
chuuya
Returns back to his apartment after a weeklong trip away on some sort of evil business trip who knows
He opens the door to his bedroom to see you sleeping in his bed, with one of his black trench coats wrapped around you
Slightly catches him off guard bc you don’t live together, but you obvi have a key so like not that weird
Laughs a silly little Chuuya chuckle before getting ready for bed himself
He doesn’t want to disturb you just yet
Idk I just love to imagine the boys and their silly little nighttime routines
I like to imagine Chuuya’s isn’t anything complicated but does take the time to brush his teeth, wash his face and moisturize (only uses the right things bc you bought them for him), and brush his hair before conking out
Makes his way over to the bed to gently shake you awake, whispering your name
Your eyes flutter open and take a second to take in the situation and the person waking you up
But as soon as you do, you’re wide awake and absolutely throw yourself onto the poor man who is probably very tired
He catches you but laughs, petting your hair as you squeeze the absolute shit out of him
“I’m so happy you’re finally home :’)”
“Me too, baby”
He asks why you have his coat wrapped around you, surely that cannot be comfortable to sleep in
Your cheeks heat up because you’re just a lil embarrassed
“I really missed you, and having your coat on felt like you were hugging me :(“
He feels both adoration because that’s so sweet, but sadness because he hated that him leaving you made you so sad
He pulls the coat off you and tosses it off the side of the bed
Pulls you into his arms and hugs you so tightly, bc damn he’ll be better than a stupid coat
You relax into the touch that you missed you so so much
You stick your hands up his shirt to feel his skin
He yelps because your hands are fuckin cold
“Is this better, my love?”
“So much better”
⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳ ✦ ⊹
akutagawa
Comes home after a long day with the pm to see you curled up on the couch, holding his t-shirt to your chest
(we’re assuming he has to own t-shirts I mean c’mon there’s no way he sleeps with that frilly ass blouse on)
You very clearly had been folding fresh laundry when you conked out
For a reason Akutagawa cannot understand his t-shirt comforted you enough to lull you into an accidental nap
(You knew why; he is cold to the entire world but an angel to you)
He’s annoyed at first, old Akutagawa kicking in where he does that thing of getting pissed at nothing
Reassesses the situation and actually realizes it’s very endearing
Still absolutely cannot grasp why you find so much comfort in him
He crouches down to try to take the shirt from you to wake you up so he can shoo you to bed (nicely, of course)
You have that shit in a death grip
He sighs the Akutagawa Sigh™
“Love, c’mon, let me take you to bed”
“hMppHHH, Ryuuu” (you are not roused easily)
He is finally able to wake your ass up
Takes you by the hand to lead you gently to the bedroom so he can put you to sleep, obvi with the intention of joining you
Must undress from earlier mentioned frilly ass blouse
That shirt will have to be pried from your cold dead fingers
Sheds frilly ass blouse, brushes teeth, makes last minute evil phone calls, etc, before crawling into the futon with you
As soon as he lays down with you, you immediately toss the t-shirt and throw yourself onto him
He does a little oof
- You wrap your arms around him and he does the same, pressing a kiss to your forehead
“Love, can I ask why you fell asleep with my t-shirt”
“Mmmmm, smells just like you. Dryer made it feel warm and cuddly like you.”
Aku hmmphs at the warm and cuddly part, but it secretly endears him
“But don’t need the shirt anymore, I got the real thing. Smells and warmth and all,” you whisper before nodding back off to sleep
You reach for him unconsciously and he pulls you even closer to him
Again he literally cannot grasp the concept of someone loving him for the entirety of who he is, but has come to accept it from you very gratefully
He has a very hard time saying it, but your love for his little things, something as small and specific as his scent (which he was not aware of), makes his heart swell with joy
Grinch moment where his heart grew 3 times its size or something
Will happily take the place of cuddled t-shirt any day <3
#didnt wanna post this rn but im gonna be gone#hence the shit theme#dazai x reader#chuuya x reader#akutagawa x reader#bungo stray dogs x reader#bungo stray dogs imagines#sealed with a kiss ♡#flora’s fics
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Crying for the first time in front of hobie? Reader is feeling really down and hes comforting her💕
alright anon i got you babe >:)
tw- mentions of suicide
HOPE YA LIKE THIS ANON 🫶🏻
💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕
everything has just sucked recently. there was really no reason for it, but it all just sucked. you got up and brushed your hair for the first time in what seemed like forever, and you finally got a glimpse of yourself. your shirt was all dirty and tear stained, your makeup was a mess, at least a week old, and your hair looked like a family of mice lived there.
“Jesus you’re a fucking mess” you whisper to yourself with a shaky voice. there you were, crying again. “God you’re fucking pathetic “ you sob, leaning into a wall and sliding down, cupping your face in your hands. you slam the side of your fist against the wall, screaming a choked up “fuck” in response.
Hobie was just getting home from the store, after buying your favorite ice cream to see if that would make you feel better in the slightest. he’d gotten home just as your fist met the wall, and after he heard you yell he dropped everything and ran to your room.
he opened the door to see you on the ground sobbing. it broke his heart to see the love of his life so upset. he stood there for a second, trying not to cry himself because of how much pain this caused him, but then he walked over to you and dropped down to wrap you in this arms. he was lightly rocking you back and forth while playing with your hair.
“what’s wrong baby?” he speaks softly into your hair, giving you light kisses.
“i don’t even know anymore hobes” you sob into his chest. “i should just die, then i can’t feel any pain, any of this bullshit reasonless sadness.”
and that broke him.
he picked you up and laid you in bed under your blankets, following suit after he finished tucking you in. he wrapped one arm around your waist, while his other free hand caressed your hair. “look at me luv” he whispered to you as you looked up at him, eyes red and puffy from crying.
“i love you so fuckin much babe, and i could never imagine going on with my life without you in it. i don’t even know how i lived without you this long, but now that i’ve gotten to experience this small bit of a long life with you, i never ever want to go through life without you again. i need you with me darling, for this life and the next, forever and always.” he says to you with a gentle smile, tears pricking in the corners of his eyes.
you didn’t even know what to say. you sat there, words caught in your throat as you stared into his eyes. “Hobie i-“ you start before he put his finger over your lips
“y’don need to say anything lovely, just relax f’me alright?”
“alright”
you lay there, stoned by his warm embrace. you don’t know how you got so lucky, but you’re glad you did.
💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕
IDK HOW TO FEEL ABOUT THIS ONE 🫣🫣
remember my requests are always open, and so are my dms if you need to talk :)
LOVE YALL SM <33
bye now
~E
#mcu#hobart brown#hobie brown#hobie x reader#hobie brown x reader#spider punk#hobie spider punk#hobie atsv#anon ask
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Here’s my observations of 1x03 - Brigade of my beloved, The Bear!!
When Carm’s at the beach, there’s a “let it rip, Buddy” which I’m pretty sure is our very first let it rip
Carm takes “the chemistry needs to change” and “just try to keep my side of the street clean” and absorbs it
I think I’ve counted 4 pepto and tums stashes? The office, the bathroom, the locker room, and his bedroom
I hate to be the one to tell you this, but Carm sleeps with socks on
In the Al-Anon pamphlet, under the DO (as opposed to DON’T) section was “take it easy— tension is harmful”
Manny, Angel, and Marcus are all definitely there before Carm. Marcus said Carmy was early, but he came in at the same time as Syd, so might be able to assume she comes in before him normally
We get to see a little bit of Carm’s purer passion for cooking. Him just deciding to teach Marcus about the plum thing because he has that knowledge to share. The Carm-Marcus mentor relationship is so superior
Also he says Har-EE-bo which threw me off. I always say HARE-ih-bo
Carm starts the French brigade to keep his side of the street clean and change what he can, but there’s also the layer where Carm likes consciously or subconsciously reliving his traumas, but in a situation he has more control over. Carmy is trying to remake New York here, except he’s the Executive Chef, but he’s not going to be overbearing like his Chef was
“Ebra: I was in a brigade once. Tina: What happened? Ebra: Many people died. Tina: See, Jeff? Carmy: It’s gonna be different” is such a good back and forth, Ebra is easily the funniest person here
Carmy parrots, “They keep their side of the street clean,” and you can almost tell he’s been rolling those words over and over in his head all day
We get Ebra’s first “I accept” !!!
After the call from Niko, it’s like Carm either doesn’t hear Richie the first time he asks, “What was that?” Or he just can’t get words to come out of his mouth. Carm’s voice goes kinda small and quiet. Richie asks if he blew a fuse, and I could imagine that’s exactly what it felt like
“I just felt like Michael was alive for a second.” Carm wasn’t there for the funeral, it’s hard to tell how it was long after Mikey died when he moved back from New York, he never grieved with anyone. He knows Michael’s dead, he can say it without a second thought, he jokes with the “I’ll ask him when he’s not dead” in 1x06, but the deepest proof he has is word of mouth. There’s bound to be some part of him that’s in denial about Mikey’s death
He hears, “I want to set this place on fuckin fire,” in his head, same as after the nightmare in 1x08, so did he know about the failing fire suppression stuff? Did Mikey say that to him at some point? Idk this is just a weird quote, some good s1 unreality tho
As Carm runs from wherever he was to out the door, you can hear shit being knocked over behind him, but he doesn’t look back. He’s pretty okay with telling people when something is wrong, but actually having them be there for him is a different story. The second he crosses the threshold into panic, he bolts, so no one can see it. When he gets off the call with Niko, he never turned around to face Richie and just waited until Richie walked out before he let himself press a hand into his chest and sit down
No matter how pissed Tina is with Syd, she’ll still ask, “What happened? Let me see” when she cuts her finger <3
Tina goes up to Sweeps and Marcus who both have the blue aprons and there’s such a good bit I forgot about, “Tina: You two look like you joined a dumbass cult. Sweeps and Marcus in unison: Thank you”
Another good Ebra bit: “Syd: Well, it’s not good, so Ebra: You betrayed me!”
When Syd goes out front looking for her onions, Richie is talking to Crooked John from 1x06 !!!
There’s a bench outside no one ever seems to use after this (that I’ve noticed), but I guess whenever we see someone go out back, they’re probably either nervously pacing (Carm) or too sad to feel like they deserve a bench (Marcus)
Even after the hellish half day she just had, it takes a little prompting from Carmy to open up about it, and when she does, it feels almost straightforward, I told you this would be bad, you didn’t listen to me, and that isn’t the job I came for, you suddenly gave me this responsibility then left, and it didn’t go well, etc. She also gains a little bit of revenge by fucking with Carmy and lightening the mood. She may not be super comfortable with explaining this stuff to others, but she seems to have a good bit of emotional intelligence (especially compared to Carm) to pinpoint everything that bothered her
Ah, the classic “fuck brunch” <33
And after all that, Carmy snuck out again at sunset to go to the beach and feel painful emotions about it being Mikey’s birthday
I think the first 2 eps introduced external and internal conflict respectively, so now, we could start getting into some recurring stuff. It starts planting the seeds for the season 2 Carmy ditching the restaurant for what he thinks will be healthier arc. And Syd gets her shit rocked, and that’s so rude because she deserves the world
Anyway! Ep 3 boom done!!
#my bear rewatch#the bear#the bear fx#the bear meta#meta analysis#panic attack#character analysis#character writing#fanfic prompt#headcanon#carmy berzatto#carmen berzatto#marcus brooks#marcus the bear#sydney adamu#ebra the bear#richie jerimovich#mikey berzatto#michael berzatto#sweeps the bear
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SPOILERS FOR ST VOL2 UNDER THE CUT 🚨🚨🚨🚨 YOUVE BEEN WARNED
barely any of my friends watch st so i need somewhere to dump all my thoughts bc my brother won’t care
okay so that was a ride
i think it’s funny how literally all the theories i saw on here were wrong
but that being said i also think the direction they took it was kinda anticlimactic?
there were so many parts they had to work with that it kinda felt like no one got the time they deserved
like there were some very well done things obviously. eddie’s guitar solo was killer and max’s sacrifice was the only part where i nearly cried
and the sequence at the end w running up that hill playing and everyone doing their individual parts that was really good too
speaking of max and eddie
how about that huh?
OKAY DONT KILL ME but i wasn’t that affected by eddie’s death, i thought he was a cool character but i didn’t get attached to him at all. i got more sad when dustin was talking to his uncle but i definitely saw it coming. it was really cool that he finally stood his ground but his death was honestly pretty unnecessary, i think the vecna crew would’ve been okay either way. but i know a lot of my moots are eddie stans and for you i mourn 😔😔i’m sorry guys i’m here for u
but max dying ??? like that fuckin got me. yeah she came back but i did not expect for her to actually DIE???? idk how eleven brought her back but i’m thankful for it lol. sadie’s acting was phenomenal
i also thought will and jonathan’s brother chat was well done, i wish they more explicitly said that will was gay and he was into mike but i mean. it was pretty obvious in every scene they were in together lmao
i’m kinda upset at how much they ignored the stuff between robin and nancy in favor of nancy and steve
and the fact that she didn’t even talk to jonathan about what happened w steve?? mans literally said he imagined you in his plans for six kids and you don’t think you should tell your boyf
but okay
i wish there was ronance but i’m happy robin and vickie got a scene together. if robin can’t get nancy i’m cool w vickie
i am kinda disappointed at the ending? like i’m happy that everyone got their reunion together it made my heart all warm but i thought it was gonna be WAY darker
like i thought vecna was gonna totally take over hawkins like completely bring the upside down to the real world. and i think that will happen next season so ig im cool with slow impending doom
i am glad that all my favorite characters are still alive though. nancy robin steve ily❤️
anyways. what a fuckin four hour rollercoaster huh. im running on 3 hours of sleep so im slightly delirious but hopefully this makes sense lmao
and feel free to comment ur thoughts or whatever or leave them in my ask box or just don’t thats cool too
#stranger things spoilers#stranger things 4 spoilers#stranger things volume 2 spoilers#stranger things s4 vol2 spoilers#spoilers#okay i think that’s enough tags to get them all blacklisted lol
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Uzui angst😩😩
I love angst idk y
bro I could cry at the very thought.
uzui is just prime material for that sad shit, and i am here for it.
u didn’t ask for this but i hope u like these ideas 😭
this is very long so put on your seatbelts man. idk.
⚠️: sad shit, poly relationships, mentions of pregnancy
like being married to all of them, but seeing the person you thought you’d marry, like the first person you’ve ever dreamed of a life with and getting all nostalgic about it. an they just know everything about you and share all these memories with you an have a cute nickname for you like ‘peaches’ or sumthin. tengen has never feared you leaving, but seeing you talk to the first person you ever considered marrying, the first person that broke your heart, the first person you could have lived out a happy life with— he’s fucking terrified and reading more into it than he should.
what if they don’t give you enough love? what if they aren’t enough for you? will you leave with your ex-partner? would you be happier with them? you seem happy with them here now, and he swears your smile is brighter, but almost bittersweet and you never look at them like that and FUCK, you’re going to leave them. you aren’t though— you’re just trying to get closure from the person who left you like??? ahifkiejsja.
just wait until you have the heart to heart with your ex-partner and your now spouses are snooping on the conversation and it’s one of the most heart-wrenching things they’ve ever heard. like you’re ex-partner just, “you ever think about us?”and you’re shocked by the question, but answer truthfully, “of course i do. you were my best friend.” and it’s just a long conversation about how the timing wasn’t right— about how the two of you just would never be ready for each other, it just isn’t meant to be.
and your ex-partner just, “even if we aren’t together— you’ll always be my girl.” and then you’re ugly sobbing because this person was your best friend too, and you’ve never got to have this conversation with them and you always wanted to know if you did something to drive them away. it’s such a relief to you that you don’t even notice the bushes vibrating.
now makio is ready to fight— they made her wife CRY. suma is prolly crying because you’re crying and also because you’re HER girl— how DARE they call you that. hina feels like she could throw up at the thought of you leaving and tengen is waiting for your response with baited breath.
you say, “I deserved a better goodbye.” and now your spouses are just hoping this means you’ll stay here, with them.
————
(the next two are based on this post)
or like bouncing off the idea of being his first love and leaving him when he starts a relationship with his now-wives, right?
like you just fuckin end up marrying one of the other hashira so you live in the compound all pretty an happy and just out of his reach and tengen literally gets sick to his stomach every time he sees you and your spouse because that could have been him. that should be him. he should be parading you around and holding your hand and being the one you look at like that. but he isn’t, and he just has to watch from the outside as you love them the way he wanted you to love him and you have the family he imagined having with you, minus him, and I could throw up!!!!!!
bonus points if it’s giyuu (literally polar opposites) because tengen is bitter that he got to marry you— he barley has a personality. you can’t possibly be happy with someone like giyuu, but the way you cling to tomioka tells a different story— the way you smile when he looks at you, the way you pack him lunch everyday, the way you stand out on the porch of your shared house at the ass crack wrapped in his clothes to get one last goodbye in— tengen knows you used to do those things for him.
tengen shouldn’t dislike tomioka because he has you— but he does. tengen knows what it’s like to be loved by you, and he hates himself for thinking it— but tomioka doesn’t deserve you. he doesn’t deserve to listen to you laugh, or hold you at night, or just be in your very flamboyant presence.
just tengen being fucking bitter that you’ve moved on and are HAPPY with someone else kekekekeee
————
orrrrrrr still bouncing off the idea above— tengen knocks you up on your last shared night together, so you have to go back. (think ab it man, your baby deserves the best and tengen can provide that— you could give them a mediocre life on your own, or you could go back and the child would have everything they needed and more.)
your logic is simple, and tengen wouldn’t leave you on the streets with his child in your stomach. so you pack up, and show up on his doorstep— literally with your tail between your legs like!!!! hajajdjksnfjij. tengen is overjoyed because you came back to him. OMG DOES THIS MEAN YOU DO WANNA MARRY HIM??? but why do you look so solemn, and when you say the words— he could literally pass out, “uzui— I’m pregnant.”
and he’s just in awe, because whatever gods there are took mercy and you’re here now, where you belong— with him. there’s a moment of joy shared between the two of you, one where he’s touching at your stomach, murmuring about, “it’s our baby— and you’re sure? the tests were all positive?” it’s like a dream, almost, until you catch sight of three shadows peeking around the corner and your dream smashes like a broken mirror.
you still refuse to be his wife, and tengen is respectful of that. but when you mention you want your own house, likely still on the property, but you don’t want anything more from him— his heart is breaking in his chest rn stop playin with him like this man wtf. tengen refuses blatantly. he wants to be able to be there for you, wants to give you everything you need, so he comprises— you will get your own wing of the house, and they won’t come near you unless they have your permission.
but now it’s hard for both of you because you can hear him and his wives laughing and loving each other from your room— the way you wanted to. and all tengen can think about is how close you are, but how he still can’t have you. literally just your own circles of hell.
you’re stuck in a house with the man you loved, still love, and his wives. it’s like some fucked up fever dream that you can’t wake up from. you watch them run around the grounds that you used to— you watch tengen and makio train suma— you can hear hina humming softly in the kitchen. it breaks your heart. you’ve never felt so alone in all your life.
pregnancy hormones are a bitch and they’re making you more emotional than you’ve ever been. one night you decide to leave, but tengen catches you this time, you’re swollen and not as spry as the first time— you expect him to let you go, but he doesn’t. the sound hashira gets down onto his knees, and he holds on to the hem of the expensive dress he bought to accommodate your growing stomach, and begs you not to leave him again— he can’t handle letting you walk away from him another time, “please stay, tell me what i can do to make you stay.” it’s kind of a turning point, and you let tengen see you under the moonlight again, you let him touch the parts of you that have grown heavy— you let him hold you, let him make love to you like you’re his wife. then you let him tuck you into your bed, and he wishes he could climb in behind you, keep you safe while you sleep— but he doesn’t. leaving you alone in that room is one of the hardest thing he has ever had to do, and he doesn’t show it, but he hears you sobbing after he leaves. he’s sitting just outside the closed door, curling into himself— he wanted to make sure you fell asleep peacefully, but now his heart is in shambles— he thinks about busting into the room and curling up behind you anyways, holding you, like he used to.
he just wants you to love him back, accept his love again, like you used to.
you tell him the next day you’ll stay— but you won’t let him touch you like that again. you aren’t, and will never be one of his wives.
after that night tengen finds himself hovering in the hallway of the room you’ve retired to, watching you sleep, wishing he could comfort you— praying that you’ll change your mind and just let him hold you again. (little does he know that you would, if he asked— you could never say no. you’re all talk, but he’s too respectful to go against your wishes.) he’s watching you grow and swell up with his— your— child, the child that came from your love for each other, but you still aren’t his. he still can’t have you.
(there are multiple ways this one could end— you could end up falling in love with all of them, and getting married; you could end up marrying all of them because you’re worried for your baby’s future, or you could find someone willing to accept that you have a child with a man who is still wholly in love with you (likely that unflamboyant village boy with the pretty eyes that tengen has had to scare away from you since the beginning of your complicated relationship)— if i ever write it, it would literally be your guy’s choice.)
#send me asks#yes yes yes#someone stop me from#writing ALL OF THESE#tengen x reader#demon slayer#tengen uzui#HURT OUCH#tengen uzui x reader
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please anything for my love polkadot man like show him the love he deserves. maybe the reader is the only person who's not his mother? idk I just need my boy to be happy
ugh god fuck this man this dude he made my crush on david dastmalchian resurface so fuckin hard it hit me with the force of a fucking speeding truck like what the fuck excuse you mister mommy issues who fucking allowed that its not legal
Abner Krill seeing Reader's face hcs:
the whole thing with his mother's face is weird - not just in a sense that it's fucking weird in general, but sometimes it comes naturally, and sometimes he has to imagine someone is his mom (which happens mostly when he has to hurt them). there's not much control he has over that. most of the time, everyone around him does have his mom's face, but when he's incredibly stressed, it's like his brain starts to work differently, focusing on other things, other thoughts, and without realising his mother's face disappears sometimes, but he's way too distracted and overwhelmed to ever realise that. he has to really focus in those moments, especially if he has to use his polka dots
but with that out of the way, he really doesn't know what you look like. he has no idea. and he fucking hates it. not only because he just hates that his brain does this shit to him, but because you're so different from his mom. so... nice and kind, and you pay attention to him, and you, dare he say, care. for him, about him, it doesn't matter. you show that you care. you show concern, you worry over him, you share his happiness, you talk to him and try to bring that happiness out, and he can't even properly look you in the eye because all he sees is his mom and he doesn't want to fucking associate you with her
it's a big barrier between you two. he desperately wants to see you for who you are, to see that smile he hears in your voice when you talk to him sometimes, watch your eyes water when you laugh hard by his side, see your fucking expression when you touch him, but he can't. you're such a beautiful person on the inside, and he's sure you are even more beautiful on the outside, but whenever he looks at you, he only sees that ugliness, that suffering his mother always brought with her
and then you told him you had an idea. said you wanted to help him. make him comfortable with you. let him be free of his mother and everything she's done to him for once. you just wanted that. you just wanted him to be happy. just because. because you liked seeing him happy, wanted to see him happy more often, wanted to make him happy - this whole concept is hard for him to grasp, the fact that you fucking care. it's not a thing he ever thought possible and he's plenty grateful for you as it is already, and yet you're still doing more for him
it wasn't the best idea. it wasn't guaranteed to work. but it was worth a try. Abner wasn't ready for the disappointment he expected. he hasn't hoped for anything this much for so long, but in the back of his mind, he knew he was just fucked up. he knew he couldn't be "cured", he couldn't be helped, and most importantly, he couldn't ever be good for you. and yet you were so intent on trying. and despite everything, he was too. because there was nothing in this world he wanted more than being able to see all of you, get rid of that barrier separating you and be able to truly be with you. in whatever way you'd have him
you made him sit down with you, close his eyes. you asked him to trust you, and honestly, he wouldn't have ever thought that to be possible, but he did. he really did. you took his hands - he jumped, you noted and started informing him of all your next moves - and put them to your face. he was touching you. you made him touch you. you willingly let him cup your face in his hands. and all of that made his already quickened heartbeat speed up
gently, oh so gently, you cupped his hands in your and started mapping out your face. you let him touch every part of it and described it as best as you could. every little dip, curve and crook. every scar, every dimple, every angle. you glided his hands all over your face and let him skim his fingers over every inch of it, from the tip of your head, through your hair, all the way down to your neck. he didn't want to acknowledge the blush that was covering him up to the tips of his ears, or the fact of how much he's wanted to touch you for so long. but he did acknowledge all that you've said to him. and he tried to get a clear picture. he tried with all his might. and since the first moment his fingers touched you, he knew you were beautiful
you let him take as long as he needed, ask as many questions as he wanted. for a few moments, he wasn't even focusing on what he was supposed to, he was just focusing on touching you, on having your face right in his hands, feeling you. if you knew (and he hoped not), you didn't say anything. but then he had to let go. and he couldn't let himself focus on how cold his hands felt after you let go of them, he had to pay attention to the task at hand. for a good few moments after parting from you, he kepts his eyes tightly shut, his hands slowly balling into fists, as he hoped, begged, prayed to whoever was listening that it'd work. you let him sit there for as long as he wanted, but at some point, he had to gather all his courage, and finally, he dared to open his eyes
he was frozen, those sad eyes seemingly even... sadder. or at least that's what you judged because of how they slightly glossed over. you thought it didn't work - it wasn't too surprising, the whole idea wasn't really anywhere near perfect, but you've had so much hope in you. you wanted to free him of his burden, you wanted to help him see the world for what it truly was, but it was a hard task. impossible, it seemed. you shouldn't've been this disappointed that it failed when it was destined to fail from the beginning, and yet you couldn't help that wave of sadness that overwhelmed you. he... he really deserved to be fucking happy for once. but you couldn't give him that, unfortunately
or so you thought before he suddenly cupped your face in his hands yet again, his thumbs caressing your cheeks frantically as he smiled. grinned, even. you have never seen a human being this euphoric before, because of you nonetheless. you've never heard him laugh this genuinely, as that glossiness from his eyes escaped to his cheeks and slipped down his face as his eyes roamed yours
his fingers trembled against your skin as words - more than he ever really spoke - flowed from his mouth. his broken whispers of 'i see you's and 'you're even more beautiful than i imagined's replaced the heavy silence that previously hung around the room, and now you had to deal with an overwhelmingly happy, emotionally-repressed, socially-awkward loser that practically vibrated in his spot at the sight of you
#polkadot man#polka dot man#abner krill#tss#the suicide squad#my writing#headcannons#fluff#kinda hurt/comfort ig#some angst sprinkled in there#cmon its abner#cant have abner without some angst#anonymous#this fucking guy i SWEAR-
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Okay so here we go: ARCANE THOUGHTS
I’M FUCKING SAD
cried when Silco was like. A good dad at the end. Even as he’s fucking DYING because she SHOT HIM he was still like “no it’s okay I love you I literally do not hold this against you. Something I would have done at your age, dw about it”
Actually Silco’s ENTIRE fucking character was incredible. One of (if not THE) best written villains I have ever seen. He had a justifiable goal, went too far but in the confines of the universe it wasn’t even really much further than anyone else, he was just better at it - but then he gets a daughter! The way all of his cronies looked at each other and at him when Powder first threw herself at him, the way he just slowly sort of curled around her, the fact that she was unstable as shit and technically a massive liability and he was repeatedly told this but still he protected her because she was his KID. The fact that he’d spent his entire life working towards the same goal but literally turned it down because he loved her more. The scene where he’s talking to Vander’s statue like “I get it now”. Fucking heartbreaking, thank you
The way they portrayed Jinx’s madness????? INCREDIBLE. The way that sometimes we can see what she sees, or hear what she hears, but we also get just as much from an outside perspective and we can see exactly why she does what she does while simultaneously seeing that she’s unstable af. The way we see how she perceives things and rewrites interactions real-time so we know that, to her, it’s not an overreaction at all! But to everyone else...
Other reasons I’m fucking sad: THEY ALL VOTED UNANIMOUSLY. The whole fuckin council is like “actually, yeah, we can have peace” and now they’re all going to FUCKING DIE and I’m SO UPSET ABOUT IT. I want Mel to survive and I understand that she’s right in the path of the missile but here me out okay, like hear me out, what if she doesn’t die because she’s one of my two favourite characters and I love her
LOVE EKKO (hate that that’s how his name is spelt but hey we can’t have everything). This Little Man (hehe) literally found the singular tree growing in the undercity and was like “hey, you could make a religion safe haven outta this” and just fuckin did it. What a king
My lil gay kids! Good for them! It’s gonna take Vi a while to accept that she has feelings but I’m just happy for them. “Cupcake” I swear to god. Imagine being that cute
Jayce (again, hate the spelling. That Y is unnecessary sir) is super interesting but is he aware that he literally was never the powerhouse of the council. Like it has ALWAYS been Mel. She has been playin you, boy - not saying she doesn’t care about him but she has absolutely been playing him
Speaking of Mel playing people, still not over the QUEEN SHIT level of shade we got right at the start when Mel gave that other councillor a child’s toy for his birthday. And the fact that he fuckin LOVED IT and continues to play with it to this day. He doesn’t even know. Icon
Lil fluffy man. Heimerdinger (had to google that). Love that lil man but also he really does need to understand that not everything can be stretched out. Like, if she understood the time crunch relative to a human lifespan and ajusted his advice accordingly then he would have gotten on a LOT better with the rest of them
Also Viktor, I love you, but the animators really need to remember which side you hold your crutch. The sheer amount of scenes where it was in the wrong hand was STAGGERING like... his right leg is the injured one. So it should always be in his right hand (when he’s using it). And yet. Edit: have discovered I was ENTIRELY wrong about this my bad (ily Viktor)
OH OH ALSO I’M REALLY FUCKING SAD ABOUT THAT LIL SCIENCE LADY. IDK HER NAME BUT THE ONE THAT GOT FUCKING DECIMATED BY THE HEXCORE. SHE WAS CUTE I LIKED HER AND I FUCKING SCREAMED
Also Caitlyn’s dad is an icon. This man is just tryna keep his family together, good for him. He’s so proud of his kickass councillor wife and kickass enforcer daughter. Peak
IMEDDIATE EDIT TO ADD: the soundtrack was also just FUCKING AMAZING I am obsessed
I have a lot more thoughts and I’m absolutely going to go into more depth about this but rn I’m just. Sad. And I want more. Please give me more I need it
#arcane#arcane spoilers#idk if i need to tag that#but i am also going to be asking that everyone i know watches it so
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okay a little blurb but i just have to get it out or it’s going to kill me. this is gonna be female reader but like it’s not really importants it’s just that im half asleep and have an idea that if i don’t get out i’ll fucking die and im a lady so female pronouns sorry boys and pals. it’s ladies night. you can still read tho. ily <3
imagine a really physically affectionate y/n — she hold hands and cuddles and hugs and all that good shit with her friends. that includes her classmates + shinsou (except for mineta. all my homies hate mineta) and occasionally to villains. she also totally holds onto aizawa’s shirt when she’s taking a break or something. somehow nobody is able to say no to her affection — not even bakugou. i mean, he pitches a bit of a fit but that’s to be expected.
the reason people can’t say no to her has nothing to do with her quirk — she just looks and acts so fucking nice and they’d rather drop dead than hurt her feelings.
*quick thought
kurogiri: why did you just let her get away
shigaraki: idk she was just really nice. it’d be a dick move not to :/
kurogiri: you’re a villain *
anyways back to the actual idea
y/n plays with deku’s hands — she just messes with his fingers and like claps his hand between both of hers (his hand is between both of hers and she’s kinda smacking it back and forth). she traces the scars and points out constellations in the spread of freckles on his hands and forearms.
when it’s cold outside, y/n holds shouto’s left hand. when it hot, she holds his right hand. she hadn’t even spoken a single word to him when she started doing this. he literally said “excuse me?” when she grabbed his hand and she was like “sorry my hand is cold.” and he just “:| oh okay.” that was the end of that conversation. this conversation took place before the sports festival even happened so she was the only person he wasn’t rude to. now he just holds his hand out to her without even looking when he’s near her.
* fuyumi: omg shouto you have a girlfriend?
shouto: no??
fuyumi: but i saw you holding hands with that girl earlier
shouto: oh that’s just y/n. *
okay at first with bakugou, y/n really wanted to fucking hug him. like really badly. but ain’t no way in hell homegirl was going to even try. that’d be like pissing off an ox and then trying to pet it. not a good idea. so it started with her just touching his back with the excuse of “oh sorry there was a fuzzy on ur back. i got it off tho :)” and then she’d grab his bicep and point to her desk and say “can you help me with this :(“ she was serving very much 🥺🌸✨☺️ and he did not know what the fuck to do. for once in his life, he didn’t want to insult someone. so he went along with it. “oh what the hell. what could go wrong?” cue them moving into the dorms and y/n latching onto him every chance she gets. when they’re sitting on the couch she has her back pushed into his side. she’s like a leech and bakugou...is actually flattered.
imagine y/n gets kidnapped by the league too and she wakes up saying “can i get untied :( these restrains hurt a bit”
“should we?”
“well she asked so nicely”
“it’d be rude not to.”
“okay, dabi, untie her.”
dabi releases her and she stands up and just fuckin holds his hand. she barely knows this man but she looked at his hands and was like “i gotta fuckin hold them” and now she is. “what the fuck?” “what?” “why are you holding my hand?” “i dunno.” “...” “...”
truth is, bacon man almost cried when she held his hand. it reminded him of his siblings and she’s young enough to be his little sister or something and now he’s decided he will die for her. was a little sad when she let go of his hand. but was happy again when she held a piece of t-shirt in her hand. she was giving him very much imouto (little sister for those who don’t know)
umm maybe i’ll do more of these if people like it. might make an actual fic based off this. idk.
#affectionate reader#bnha#boku no hero academia#mha#my hero academia#bnha imagines#bnha scenarios#bnha headcanons#mha imagines#mha scenarios#mha headcanons#bnha x reader#mha x reader#dabi x reader#bakugou x reader#bakugo x reader#deku x reader#todoroki x reader#midoriya x reader#rory rambles
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So I’m finally watching the x-men movies and here are my comments and ratings so far. These ratings are completely arbitrary and completely based on how much fun I had while watching it. Also some great memes I made and sent to my roommates who dont appreciate it as much as you all will.
X-Men: First Class
Okay so we pirated this and there was no subtitles for foreign language, and about 30% of it is in German, French, Spanish, or Russian. So my understanding of these scenes was reliant solely on my rudimentary understanding of basic phrases, vocab, and counting in each of these languages
Watching Erik fuckin murder nazis while casually taking a drink of beer
Also I love Michael Fassbender but i feel like Erik’s character should have a german accent. Can’t complain too much though ngl
They went to a strip club and literally only looked at each other like sorry i dont make the rules but that is not heterosexual
I’m new to these movies so I hope I don’t offend any like, Mystique stans but Raven you win World’s Worst Sister. like bro doesnt wanna see ur tits out he doesnt care that you’re blue OKAY he’s ur brother. I’m just saying if my brother got shot in the spine by his boyfriend i wouldnt leave him lying in the sand to ditch him with said boyfriend idk maybe i’m just built different
Charles fuckin waits for Erik and Raven to leave before saying he can’t feel his legs. Anyways who else wants to cry? 🙃
Barely passes Bechdel test but loses points for immediately killing the only black man character and then have the only black woman character turn traitor 🤷🏻♀️
My guy decided to betray his boyfriend then break the woman he almost killed and then arrested out of prison. Then sometime inbetween those two events he decided “i need... a cape.” And then he STUCK TO THE CAPE for the next like forty years. Imagine being so stubborn you stick to the same purple and maroon color scheme for half your life.
Pretty gay. Friends to lovers to enemies. Utterly heartbreaking. 12/10
X-Men: Wolverine Origins
Honestly not as bad as I was expecting but that might be bc I’ve only heard negative things
This movie honestly was one big middle finger to my ADHD bc the pacing was kinda weird
Damn i hope we get Remy in the other movies his powers are hella cool in this
Deadpool who? Never heard of him he doesnt exist.
Oh yeah I think there is something called a wo-man in this movie?
3/10
X-Men
Knowing that this movie is from 2000 really made it palatable tbh. Like, surprisingly good considering it came out a month after I was born
Why do i got a feeling that Charles is gonna be so useless in the next like three movies
I forgot movies before like 2016 couldnt write women for shit. Jean is to the X-Men what Black Widow is to the Avengers tbh. Love the characters and their potential, but played with the emotional range of a teaspoon
Also Scott is pretty cool but why is his only lines about his girlfriend? Like calm down bro.
I’m so here for Dad Wolverine tbh. Like my guy really was just like:
Somehow despite having many female leads it still doesnt pass the Bechdel Test???
8/10
X2
Gonna be honest here. I was making dinner while watching this, so I was only like half present.
Bobby “coming out” to his family is just *chef’s kiss*
Kinda boring conflict ngl but I’m here for the characters at this point
Magneto murdering someone w the iron in their blood is fuckin metal as hell. No pun intended.
The moment Rogue sees Magneto for the first time since he tried to kill her in the last movie and she about to take her gloves off deceased me on the fuckin spot. Bitch really said call an ambulance but not for me.
Anyways Charles is one of the most powerful characters in the comics but he has once again been relegated to plot device in this movie. I get it, I get it, mentor character. He could fix every problem in these movies if he wasn’t such a liberal about his powers :/
I’m so SICK of the silent and dangerous Asian assassin character archetype. Yes I KNOW it was 2003 so let’s take this as yet another reminder that we need to do better
Okay ik we’re not supposed to know that Mystique is his sister yet bc it’s only 2003 and First Class wont come out for another eight years but STILL yall really left him in there to die can you NOT
Also real question: was i supposed to be sad that Jean died?
5/10
#xmen#xmen first class#xmen united#X2#charles xavier#wolverine#wolverine origins#erik lensherr#rogue xmen#iceman#scott summers#jean grey#mystique#cherik
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| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 | [CHAPTER 5]
pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader
this chapter’s notes; camshow, use of toys(sybian), squirting, the long awaited chapter 5 😳💕 do they finally meet?!?!?!?! hehehehehehe also sorry for not being able to post this yesterday, had a busy week and when I tell ya I woke up at 3pm today 😗 💕💕💕💕 as always, thank you so much for your continued interest!! I'm already writing ch 6 and im SOOOO EXCITEDDDD hHEHEHEHEEHEH 💕💕💕💕💕 HAVE A GREAT REST OF YOUR WEEKENDS! 🍒
chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - ?
“You guys! I--you have to see this!”
You can’t wipe the smile off of your face when you shimmy to the side, excitedly showing off the new gift that Seungcheol had sent in the mail.
sleepy_wonu: holy hell
universe_WZ: that mustve costed hella
alphagyu97: nothin like feelin extra poor amirite lads
angelhan: it was only a matter of time before dom.cheol was untouchable lol
You giggle slightly as you adjust the camera so that you and your new sybian are in frame. “Hey~ Don’t say that!! Y’know it’s not the amount of money you spend on me… I’m glad you guys are always here with me~” The sound of coins clinking goes off in the back as you read a few more comments.
dom.cheol: well princess, don’t u wanna show them how you use your new toy? ;)
tangerine_kwan: fuck i bet it can get u to cum so fuckin fast
hoshi_tiger_xx: yessss
dom.cheol has donated $100
hoshi_tiger_xx has donated $50
“Hmm~ How many times do you think I can cum with this? Oh! Why don’t we do this~” You pause, sliding your wet panties down your legs before tossing the material to the side. You grin, swinging a leg over the toy until you’re straddling it. “Rapid fire question! Whoever guesses the right amount of orgasms I can take before I call quits… Wins a special unreleased photoset of me! Go!”
dom.cheol: 5
universe_WZ: 4
sleepy_wonu: 6
angelhan: 3
artist8hao: 5
alphagyu97: everyone took all the good numbers already!!! 7!!!!!
gentleman_josh95: DMAN IT 3
tangerine_kwan: 8, fuck
kitty_junjun: ugh i was gonna say 4!!!!
xcaliburDK: i was gonna say 5!!!!
therealchan99: 2? thats so low tho….
chwenon: as if anyone is gonna say 1, lmao. Uh 6…. If sleepy_wonu happens to disappear
hoshi_tiger_xx: im gonna say 10, but… seems… risky
Reaching for the remote, you situate yourself until the raised part of the toy sits directly on your clit. A shiver runs up your spine at the feeling; already excited for what’s in store. “Um, to be fair I haven’t tried it myself yet so I’m not sure either... Hehe, but I guess we’ll find out together, huh?”
Gulping, you set the sybian to its lowest setting, the air getting knocked out of your lungs immediately as your body lurches forward. “H--holy shit!” The vibrations are already harsh on the lowest setting; your fingers gripping the remote tightly as you try to adjust to the feeling. “O--oh my g-god, I--”
dom.cheol: aww can ur cute lil clit take it?
xcaliburDK: maybe one of the lower numbers was right lol…
The moans spill freely from your lips, garbled noises getting lost in the mix when you start to grind against the vibration. “Fuck, it--it feels suh--so good, hah, already feel like ‘m gonna cum…” You whine, already getting lost in the pleasure. For a second, you’re tempted to raise the vibration intensity but you hold back, letting your wetness coat the toy as you continue to grind down onto it. The sound of donations and comments sound fuzzy to your ears; only the sound of the sybian buzzing reminding you that the camera was still even on.
“Ngh, g-god, I’m--I’m gonna cum!”
tangerine_kwan has donated $75
xcaliburDK has donated $50
dom.cheol has donated $200
dom.cheol: cmon, lets see that pretty pussy cum
Your legs shake as you cum, only a squeak coming out of your mouth as you lurch forward atop the toy. The grip you have on the remote loosens while simultaneously trying to turn it off in the midst of your orgasm.
dom.cheol: awww cumming so hard on the first setting? Cute
therealchan99: lol baby is in trouble now
angelhan: maybe 3 was right lmao
“I--a-ah, fu--fuck!” You cry, shaky fingers finally managing to shut the toy off. Your body immediately untenses; chest heaving with how sensitive you already were and it had only been your first orgasm and the lowest setting of the toy. “O-oh my g-god, I--I didn’t know i-it was that s-strong…” You mumble, body buzzing with the remnants of your orgasm.
sleepy_wonu: well mr dom.cheol did pay top dollar
gentleman_josh95: imagine if u had this for yesterdays show lol
“Oh god, if--if I had this for yesterday’s show, I would’ve been too boneless to do today’s show!” You laugh airily, slowly grinding against the toy already. “It feels really nice though… I’m already super curious about how strong the other settings are…” Trailing off, you reach for the remote again, throat dry as you fiddle with the knob.
kitty_junjun: what if u set it to the max setting
chwenon: idk if her cute lil body could take it
dom.cheol: its okay baby, take ur time. I wanna see how sensitive that pussy of yours can get
“But ‘m already so sensitive~ I dunno how much more I can take~” You tease, biting your lip when all the comments flooding the chat are words of encouragement.
You knew when you started camming that it’d be no easy job. Building up your fanbase and subscriber count had taken you months upon months to even get within the thousands and camming was physically exhausting. Some days your viewer counts were low and some days they were above average and sometimes you didn’t make as much in one show than another.
tangerine_kwan: was therealchan99 right with 2 then? Heh
therealchan99: finally FINALLY ITS MY TIME TO SHINE
Giggling, you slowly start turning the knob; body twitching when the vibrations kick in at full force.
Seungcheol watches in amazement at the way your body jerks atop the machine.
He can see the way your legs twitch unbearably when you cum for the third time; your brows furrowed at the intensity of the vibrations and your taut body when you can barely manage to turn the machine off.
Licking his lips, he slowly thrusts up into his closed palm, spreading the precum down his shaft as he watches you catch your breath.
“I--ngh, fuh--fuck, I---I don’t--don’t know if I--I can cum a-again…”
Seungcheol moans at your breathy whimpers; the arousal in his body pooling up quickly when he sees the fucked out expression in your eyes. His eyes flit to the wetness that coats the silicone portion of the toy, smirking when he realizes how much you really seemed to enjoy the gift he’d gotten you.
Mentally patting himself on the back, he praises himself for making the right decision.
angelhan: please tlel me im the winner im begging
universe_WZ: NO
dom.cheol: is the princess tired already? ;)
You catch your breath, not wanting to give up despite how fuzzy your head was getting and how much your body was buzzing. “I dunno… We still haven’t tried the last setting, you guys… And I’m just so curious...” You whisper, hazy eyes staring into the camera.
hoshi_tiger_xx: god u look so pretty like this, all fucked out
artis8hao: right? fuck, id kill to be that guy who can get u off like this
xcaliburDK: goddamn same
The sound of coins clinking mixes with the ringing in your ears; fingertips already on the knob of the remote.
You take a deep breath, letting the adrenaline kick in as you quickly set the knob to the highest setting, a high pitched cry spilling from your lips when you let go of the remote in favor of holding onto the machine instead. Grinding down onto it, you meet the toy's harsh vibrations as it quickly forces another orgasm out of you in the matter of seconds.
Choked cries spill from your lips as your entire body tenses up; body twitching uncontrollably as you cum for the fourth time. You lean back with whatever energy you have left, bracing yourself on the back of the toy as you relieve your swollen clit of the buzzing machine. Your orgasm refuses to stop and you can already tell how obscenely wet everything’s gotten when your head starts to clear.
alphagyu97: fuck you squirted all over the toy baby
universe_WZ: fuck fucki fuck
universe_WZ: wait did i winf kjfhdsjk
You shakily slide off of the machine, resting on your side as the machine still buzzes with life next to you. Your entire body won’t stop shaking, head muddled as you fight the urge to shut your eyes and sleep for the next 5 days. “I’m--I--” You whimper, still feeling the phantom vibrations between your legs.
“I--ho--holy fuck, I, w-wow, I--I don’t--that--I’m, I’m just… wow.”
dom.cheol has donated $400
dom.cheol: knew you’d like it ;)
universe_WZ: THAT MEANS I WON
universe_WZ has donated $150
angelhan has donated $150
therealchan99: well, at least some of us got close
hoshi_tiger_xx: fuckin speak for urself man i said /10/
You end the show after letting ‘universe_WZ’ know you’ll contact him soon, shutting your eyes as you lay on your soiled sheets.
You can still feel your fingertips twitching when your eyes slide shut, chest heaving in deep breaths as you try to relax yourself, momentarily cursing yourself for pushing your body too far for tonight’s show.
Groaning, you reach for your phone, the screen lighting up with a text from Seungcheol, a simple ‘don’t forget to drink water ;)’ in your notifications and you can’t help but pout.
Seungcheol was nice, almost too nice. Definitely not in a murderer kinda way though, you think.
He bought you expensive gifts and never asked for anything in return which made you feel bad sometimes. And while the donations and tips you’d made through your camshows was enough to get by with, Seungcheol’s generous donations helped you always make your rent and bills on time without worrying if you’d have enough or not.
You quickly text him back with a smile on your face; hoping that he’ll like what you had to offer.
Seungcheol feels the exact same way he did when you first contacted him offering him a free show, except maybe ten times worse. At first, he’d been a little sad that he hadn’t won your quick little game but this made up for it 20-fold.
The six simple words read ‘want to meet up next friday?’, a small heart emoji next to the question and he’d almost thrown his phone when he read it, hands shakily responding with a simple ‘I’d love to.’ to make it seem like he was calm when he was most definitely not.
His immediate next order of business after replying was to text Namjoon despite how late into the night it already was, begging for the day off and offering to take any shifts or pay cuts in exchange for it.
All he needed was one day and he swore he’d never miss a day of work ever again.
Namjoon responds with a quick ‘sure, why not’, momentarily confusing him as to why his boss was awake while simultaneously sending Seungcheol into complete panic when he realizes he finally gets to meet you.
The week goes by extremely quickly to Seungcheol; his mood on a completely different level when he offers to pick up Yoongi’s Sunday shift without a complaint. He cleans up all the messes around the roller rink and even offers to do jobs that aren’t his which have Jeongguk raising a brow at the older male.
In the days that lead up to your meeting, Seungcheol looks up a few cafes that you might be interested in and even goes to get an STD exam, not that he’s expecting anything. Safety first, he says.
Your Wednesday show comes and goes, Seungcheol too excited to even get off when he watches you and he even donates an extra $600 at the end of the show; travel spending money, he offers.
And Thursday comes without a hitch and he all but skips to the employee backroom once his shift is over, humming a tune while he changes out of his uniform.
“Hey hyung, no offense, but are you okay?” Jeongguk rests against the locker next to Seungcheol’s open one, brow raised at the blue haired male that beams back at him. “I’m scared, why are you so… giddy. You even offered to take Yoongi-hyung’s weekend shift? What the hell was that about? I’ve never seen him that giddy either. Man, this place is getting weird, maybe I should quit...”
Seungcheol can’t help but laugh, patting Jeongguk on the shoulder before shutting his locker.
“I have an important meeting tomorrow, that’s all. And don’t quit, ‘cause who else is gonna give me free food.”
While the excitement had him since Saturday, now that it was finally Friday, he was downright nervous.
The two of you had agreed to meet at 2PM in front of the cafe that Seungcheol had picked out and you’d gotten a hotel in town to make it easier on yourself instead of trying to get back to your place too late. Seungcheol had offered to come pick you up, but you had politely declined; instead opting to meet him first before letting him do anything else for you.
And by nature, Seungcheol gets to the cafe 15 minutes early, fidgeting and continuously running his fingers through his hair as he patiently waits. He can feel his palms getting sweaty when he rubs them against his jeans, mentally trying to keep calm and his head floods with all sorts of thoughts; mainly, how he even got into this position with you in the first place. And he gets so distracted that he doesn’t realize you’d be standing watching him zone out for the last 5 minutes.
“Wow, not sure what’s got you so focused but you’re standing so still!”
Seungcheol hears your cute airy laugh that follows, a cherry blush on his cheeks when his eyes meet your smiling face. “I--oh my god…” He whispers, taking in your appearance.
He feels his face buzzing, fingers twitching when he sees you in a cute simple sundress. “W-wow, you--you’re just… so beautiful. I mean, you’re beautiful on cam too but just, wow, in person? Incredible.” The blush reaches his ears when he realizes he’s rambling, a nervous laugh spilling out of his lips.
“S--sorry, I, uh, usually I’m more chill than this but y’know…” He trails off, to which you nod. You step closer to Seungcheol and he gets a hint of your sweet smelling perfume, mentally groaning when your cute eyes peer up into his.
“That’s okay! I totally understand~ I’m kinda nervous myself too, to be honest…” You pause, a pink blush coating your own cheeks. “But let’s talk over some food, huh?”
Seungcheol doesn’t want to pry, but he’s not sure if he should address you as ‘Cherry’ in person, or if he should avoid calling you by anything at all.
He watches as you go through the cafe’s menu, biting the inside of his cheek as he itches to ask.
“‘Cheol… I can feel you staring, y’know.. Penny for your thoughts?” You ask, concerned eyes meeting his nervous ones.
“I just-- Sorry, I didn’t mean to be awkward, I just was wondering how I should address you in person? I don’t want to overstep my bounds, I know you don’t put your real name out there so…”
You place your menu down, closing it before leaning on your palms atop the small table. Seungcheol is cute, too cute, you think. You knew this would be a question when the two of you eventually met and you had given yourself the time to get used to the idea that he’d know your real name.
He eyes hyperfocus on your glossy lips, watching as you say your name for him for the first time.
Seungcheol’s heart threatens to beat out of his chest when he hears it; repeating it over and over in his head before he says it out loud.
“Wow, it sounds nice when it’s you saying it~” You tease, leaning back in your chair. “I don’t mind if you call me by my name, by the way! The pet names are cute but maybe we should keep that to the bedroom~” You end in a whisper, winking at the male.
Fuck, he thinks, just as his cock throbs at your comment. He really wishes you wouldn’t say things like that because he’s weak and he knows it, especially when it comes to you. “Okay, cool! Yeah, sorry, I just---I didn’t want to overstep, I know you don’t really let that be public information.”
“Of course! And thank you, I really can’t tell you how much you’ve done for me. I really… really wouldn’t be able to do all the things that I do if it weren’t for your constant support.”
You want to say more, but the waiter comes to take your orders, cutting you off until he leaves again.
“By the way…” Seungcheol looks at you with curious eyes, lips puckered around his drink straw. “Tell me about yourself, ‘Cheollie! I feel like we didn’t really get to talk that one time!”
He swallows the water in his mouth, licking his dry lips. Here goes nothing, he thinks.
“I swear, and please don’t think I’m a loser, but I--I work at a roller rink. It’s really not cool, I’m not some high paid CEO or whatever, I--I just, I work hard?” Seungcheol chuckles, running a hand through his hair as he waits for your reply.
“Wait, that’s so cool! Oh my gosh, I kinda wanna go!”
The surprise washes over Seungcheol, eyes wide as saucers when he hears you saying you’d want to visit his workplace. “Wuh---wait, seriously!?”
“Yeah! It’s kinda, like, retro! I haven’t been to one since I was a kid!” He quickly offers to bring you to the roller rink on Sunday so you could have somewhere to hang out while you were in town.
“And sadly, I took a shift on Sunday so you can hang with me while I work.”
Seungcheol grins, watching as you jokingly roll your eyes at him. “So you did it on purpose, huh…” The two of you share a laugh, glad that your first meeting seemed to be going okay so far.
“Well, I mean, if it makes you feel any better, my best friend works the concession stand so I’ll make sure to get you a free pair of skates and food whenever you want?”
“It’s a deal!”
The two of you continue to talk over your late lunch, Seungcheol telling you of the various work hijinks he’d gone through at his time working at the roller rink.
“Which, by the way, that morning show you did… Hope you know I holed up in the restroom for an entire hour for that ‘lil stunt.”
You can’t help the tears that fall from your eyes when you laugh, only feeling slightly bad for the blue haired male. “But I told you! Sometimes it’s just like that, y’know~” You tease back, heart blooming at the way you and Seungcheol got along.
In all honesty, there’d been something on your mind since you first sat down and you didn’t know when the right time to ask was, or if it was even appropriate.
The smile slips from your face as you bite the inside of your cheek in thought.
Seungcheol takes the bill from the waiter, slipping his card into the holder before you can even offer. But he notices the way your expression falls, noting the hesitance in your eyes when he looks at you from across the table.
“Are you okay? What’s wrong?” His voice is gentle, soft and caring when he leans over the table to make sure you’re alright.
“Yeah! Just---Can I ask you for a favor?”
#cherrybomb!cheol#seungcheol smut#seventeen smut#svt smut#scoups smut#scoups scenarios#scoups imagines#seungcheol imagines#seungcheol scenarios#svt scenarios#svt imagines#seventeen imagines#seventeen scenarios#scoups#seungcheol
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ok hold on. acomaf is my fave book out of the whole series (it's mostly out of emotional value, i read it when i was younger and didn't have a real understanding out trauma and abuse only that i saw a character i loved getting out of a bad situation and getting happy) so obviously i didn't mind feysand being endgame and the development all of the characters had. i can accept tamlin turned out like that is realistic due to his trauma, i can accept feyre had to flee because it wasn't right for her, but the thing is after acofs i see no point to feyre leaving tamlin when rhysand ends up doing everything they told us tamlin was evil and unredeemable for. hiding the risks of her pregnancy, putting on shields on her, having feyre need to compromise over it. i honestly felt so betrayed by that. i'm not saying feyre and tamlin were good for each other, but it doesn't feel worth it to dismiss the potential they had for what we got with feysand.
also, sarah learn to treat "ugly" trauma with respect challenge. no they don't need to learn to physically fight to fight it. no they don't need a love interest to overcome it. yes the behaviors acquired from trauma and abuse aren't pretty but that doesn't mean a person is undeserving of kindness and compassion.
i think i had a point somewhere but i can't get to it. so hope you don't mind my rambling. anyway i loved your meta about tamlin i think he deserves better too
HOLY SHIT THIS ONE IS SO GOOD OK IM SO EXCITED
Bro you are so fine, I'm the one who doesn't make any sense and I totally get what you're trying to say. (Acomaf was actually my favorite book in the series too ngl)
BUT FUCK YEAH LETS TALK ABOUT RHYSAND.
I don't think it's a secret that Rhysand is one of my least favorite characters in media, probably ever? (How do I even put this into words) He is a bad character and to me, laughably so. You know how if you've ever written a character, there's that little phase that's like "what if people don't like this character' and then you're sad for a little bit? That's how Rhysand feels to me. He feels like SJM looked at this character and thought "I can't stand the thought of people not liking this character because I love him so much" and then did everything in her power to make sure we know how great he is.
Idk if this is just me screaming into the void, but I get to this place with my characters where like, especially if they are a little more morally gray or their decisions have negative impacts, I understand that I don't need the audience to like my main character. they can stand on their own, they can own up to what they do and they can grow from it. Thats what a good character does. That's how you keep your audience rooting for them. You gotta knock them over sometimes.
SJm doesn't knock Rhysand over. She doesn't push him to make mistakes, apologize, own up and move on. Rhysand has never made a decision that ended poorly for him. Everything goes the way he wants it to, because SJm wants us to know how cool and great he is. People who are cool and great don't make bad decisions! SJm doesn't let Rhysand fail, and she doesn't let him suffer his own decisions. Everyone else suffers his decisions, not him.
Rhysand's reputation as a good person hinges entirely on the audience liking him and/or thinking he's hot. And then what happens when the audience thinks neither of those things? Ya get a rly long post like this by a lil enby who is mad all the time. Rhysand loses all credibility when you look at him through a critical lens. Not a single thing the man does makes any goddamn sense. Here I thought acosf would give us a different perspective on Feysand and I was desperately hoping that Nesta would tell us what she really sees in them and how people around them really feel, I hoped that SjM would throw us for a loop and tell us that hey, she does know that Feysand are fucking toxic as hell and ruin the lives of people around them and she wants to show us that from an outside perspective but noooOoOOOoOoOOOO...
Instead we get Nesta hating herself because Rhysand told her that she shouldn't tell Feyre that Feyre could uh die in childbirth. Hey what the fuck.
Now I don't actually ship feylin, I kinda always sorta knew, even without spoilers, that it wasn't going to work out. Tamlin isn't sjm's idea of a good partner because he's not charming and witty and dark and handsome ya know? We met Rhysand and I knew that I was going to fucking hate this romance. Which sucks because I found Rhysand so intriguing in the first book. Ngl all the time spent in the spring court was kinda boring and every time Rhysand showed up to throw dead faeries at Tamlin I was like "oooooo" and I wanted to know more about why Tamlin, this awkward, blunt and kinda shy dude had beef with this super duper sly and shady man from another court.
I don't know if I've ever said this before, but SJm doesn't let her love interests grow. Rhysand doesn't change over the course of the story because he was already a good guy and his motives were for Feyre's sake I swear, the same goes for Rowan in TOG. SJm doesn't give Rhysand room to change. She needs to get to the part where they fuck make sure everyone knows that Rhysand is a good guy and actually he was good all along so that we like him more than Tamlin. It backtracks on everything bad Rhysand has ever done because you know... He had a good reason! It's fine!
I know it's probably just because SJm doesn't actually know how to write a good character growth arc but... Like can you imagine if Rhysand stayed the bad guy? Or at least remained the bad guy through acotar and acomaf? And then when Rhysand comes to take Feyre for his bargain it really was only to spite Tamlin? What about Rhysand, taking Feyre to the night court with him once a week every month for a long time, if only to see Tamlin's eyes grow darker and emptier every time he goes, and then he really starts to fall in love with Feyre. He's been a monster all this time, angry and cold and cruel and then he actually starts to fall in love. And then to get Feyre to stay he really does try to change, he stops antagonizing Feyre, he stops throwing dead faeries at Tamlin, and he stops harassing the Spring court. He starts spending genuine quality time with Feyre, he starts to learn about her and all the things she likes and he stops trying to get her to come with him just so Tamlin will be mad. He starts asking her to come with him because he wants to be around her and he prays that someday she'll want to be around him too. What if SJm let him grow.
But nahhhhhh instead we have a character who always knows the right answer to things, and he always knows how to fix every issue, and he is always so innovative and outside the box except that he isn't. We get a character who does the same shit as Tamlin but it's ok because he had a good reason not to tell Feyre that she could very well die in childbirth. Uhhhh don't know what that is but uhhh I know he has his reasons because all he has are his reasons.
It would be so easy to hold a mirror up to Rhysand and say "look at this. Look who you are. Do you not look just like Tamlin right now?"
But nooooooooOoOOOo Rhysand doesn't get to be wrong. Rhysand doesn't get to look like Tamlin because Tamlin is evil and Rhysand is definitely NOT I SWEAR.
But yeah I think the point I'm trying to make is that Sarah thinks so highly of Rhysand that he could never do wrong. He could never be like Tamlin, despite the narrative literally telling us the exact opposite.
Like you said, we lost the potential of what feylin could have been if SJm didn't suddenly decide that her audience needs to love Rhysand as much as she does. I think feylin could have been slow and sweet and a story of true healing and learning about one another. I think it would have been kind and steady and lots of "are you ok"s and "I'm sorry"s and "talk to me"s. Everything about Feysand feels rushed and hard and fast and the rest of the world doesn't have time to catch up. It's fucking exhausting to read it ya know what I'm saying.
(also can we talk about Rhysand like dying and Feyre finding the suriel and learning he's her mate and then instead of being like "k let's put a pin in that and fuckin save his life first" she like throws him around and everyone is like "wtf woman" and she's like I neeD tO Be alOnE these people have no idea how to prioritize)
Truly, I think it's innocent to a degree. There is absolutely no harm in wanting people to like your character. The harm comes when you destroy another character with no reason or explanation other than you want people to like a different character. Villain arc? Completely out of left field. You gotta build to that shit or like... Make it so that when you look back you slap your forehead and yell at a wall "OF FUCKING COURSE I SHOULD HAVE SEEN IT"
anyways, SJm treat "ugly" trauma with respect challenge SECONDED.
WELL IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME WEEKS YO WRITE IM HAVING A HARD TIME I know it probably doesn't make any sense I can't find my braincells BUT thanks for the ask @xelly
Tell me all your acotar things I love yo hear them !!
#rhysand#anti rhysand#anti sjm#anti acotar#anti inner circle#tamlin#lucien deserved better#they all deserved better frankly
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okay i’ve been distracted all day at work thinking about my thoughts re: the vampire academy reveal so here we go: ⬇️
rose: sisi stringer gets my tick of approval (not that anyone cares lmao), she is gorgeous she is fierce (and she’s australian so you KNOW i’m gonna support her) and i am HERE for some diversity in the cast. questioning the description where it says she’s the strongest fighter in her class because uhh she missed two years of training right? i’m assuming lissa and rose still ran away in this adaption?? she was so bad at combat that dimitri had to train her out of hours just to catch her up to her peers?? not a huge negative for me though, we all know rose is a badass & she caught up super quick to her classmates anyway so not a big deal
lissa: daniela nieves looks sweet but also like she could stab you, which is exactly the vibe is get from lissa (except lissa wouldn’t stab someone ofc, she would just compel them into thinking they were stabbed). i don’t mind that she doesn’t look like book lissa, but i do wonder if it will effect the little insecurities and jealousies that rose has around lissa in the books, but honestly they aren’t pivotal to the plot so idc. also i know everyone is talking about the “younger sister to the heir apparent” part of her description, honestly i think this is just in reference to andre taking the title of prince dragomir not the actual throne, but i could be wrong idk we’ll see and i mean she ends up as queen anyway soooo
dimitri: i was sold at kieron moore’s cheekbones tbh. and he’s actually 24! that’s right folks normal twenty-four years olds don’t look thirty! i’m loving his insta interactions already so i feel like he’s captured who dimitri is already, and i’m sure he can put on a russian accent perfectly well please please let him have a russian accent. still wondering if they will mess with his age, but i’m going to assume he’s still 24, judging by the description, and that maybe rose has been aged up?? idk, i just can’t wait to see him with long hair and a duster
christian: YES. andrè dae kim is 100% the closest character visually to what i imagined! love this!! getting the vibe that he’ll be the one to make the st vladimir connection? book christian didn’t come off as being very studious, except when it came to helping lissa, but he was also a total smartass so who knows what he got up to outside of rose’s POV. very keen to see that his backstory isn’t being brushed off and overall absolutely love him!!
victor: i never actually gave much thought to how victor looks, so j august richards is great in my books! i’m very keen to see some lgbtq+ representation in this series, but i’m kinda concerned that they’ve chosen (who i presume will be) the series’ villain to be the one in a same-sex relationship?? i’m also a bit confused & very curious about him having two daughters?? natalie is such a pivotal part of book one, unless they’re splitting her part into two i’m not sure how this would work? though a part of me wonders if they’re going to make robert doru’s character a child of victor’s, or even avery lazar’s character his child?? idk but should be interesting
tatiana: VOGEL??? this is where i get super confused. she sounds like tasha (without the relation to christian), but her name is tatiana but she’s also clearly not queen tatiana soooo ??? i saw a very cool post from @sydneysageivashkov talking about how they think there might be multiple timelines involved, in which case vogel could be a maiden/married name for queen tatiana?? that would be cool. regardless, not really sure what is happening here but i guess we’ll see 🤷🏼♀️
mia: KARP??? again, i am confused. i can definitely see her having book mia’s doll-like cute features, and i’m not too fussed about her not having the curly blonde hair tbh as someone who has naturally curly blonde hair i absolutely hate seeing others with it because of the second hand pain lmao. now getting to the part we all actually care about in mia’s description: lgbtq+ mia!! oh my fuckin god i am HEEEEEERE for this, mia has always been gay let’s be real here folks, i love this. also is she going to be related to sonya karp?????? questionsssss
meredith: tbh i sometimes forget that meredith exists so seeing her as a main character is uhhh ??? weird ???? is she replacing eddie? god i fuckin hope not. maybe she’s one of victor’s children?? idk. it’s weird but i’m curious to see where they’re going with her, plus it’s be good to see more female dhampirs because let’s be honest we don’t really see anyone other than rose and eventually dimitri’s family in the book series
sonya: ARE WE GETTING PRE-STRIGOI SONYA??? ohhhh i am KEEN. not sure how it’ll effect the storyline, maybe it’ll be told through flashbacks, again going back to the multiple timelines idea? also mikhail????? i didn’t think the books brought him into it until later, but idk i love them sm i am so excited for this. sonya is a little younger than i imagined, but i actually don’t see that as being a bad thing. also is she related to mia now???
mason: aw i’m gonna be sad if he doesn’t have red hair i won’t lie, but at the end of the day it’s really about attitude with mason and i think andrew liner will pull it off really well. his description seems to be pretty on-character, but it looks like the tv show is maybe going to play some sort of classmate rivalry between mason and rose?? could be interesting, idk, still looks like he’s gonna be a big simp for rose though lmao bless
so yeah i have concerns buuuuut i’m gonna wait it out and see what they do with it. lemme know what you guys think too!! x
#vampire academy#va#rose hathaway#lissa dragomir#dimitri belikov#christian ozera#mason ashford#also IS SYDNEY GONNA BE IN IT LIKE THE RUMOUS SUGGEST???#AND WHAT HAPPENS WITH ADRIAN IF TATIANA VOGEL IS TATIANA IVASHKOV???#AAAAAAAAAH SO MANY QUESTIONS WHY CAN’T I BE PATIENT?? 😭😭😭
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Loki ep 6 thoughts
-FEAR
-recap reminds me I hate ravonna
-I want more mobius/sylvie
-THE SONG WAHHH
-The QUOTES IN THE INTRO?? WAHHH?,
-OH,?? REAL PEOPLE VOICES??
-Greta thin burg I love u
-upside down heart in rock
-THE SUSOICIOUS LACK OF THEME MUSIC WITH THE LOKI LOGO
-this music slaps everyone say thank u Natalie holt
-they look so good….ugh
-sylvies hair…wah
-THE LITTLE CALLBACK TO LAMENTIS
-she’s asking him to tell her to stop :’)
-best buds I love dem
-she’s pulling the ‘I’m 8 minutes older than u!!’ Argument that every twin pulls
-she needs a moment now but she didn’t hesitate back in ep 4. Hmm
-Tom looks fuckin great here let’s not lie
-statues?? Omg who
-ominous door slam
-I FUCKING JUMPED
-OMINOUS ‘HEY YALL???’
-THAT WAS HORRIFYING
-what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck
-I need a second
-I’m so sorry that gives me the ‘HEY SISTERS’ jumpscare energy I’m laughing but terrified
-kang
-it’s fuckin kang aint it
-oh he scared
-he’s scared
-of the lokis
-wants to bargain with them hmm
-bitchboy
-this never ends well
-BRO HES PAST THIS STUPID FUCKIN BATTLE
-this is a trick loki PLS DONT FALL FOR IT
-full offense but ‘we can reinsert you so you won’t disrupt the timeline’ and ‘you can kill thanos and have the infinity gauntlet’ cannot POSSIBLY coincide
-her eyes are creepy
-don’t let this overrule your GOAL SYLVIE
-god one of you have braincells pls
-oh she thinks they’re a thing too huh
-Disney don’t do it I stg
-THANK u
-sylvie looks so annoyed girl me too
-even my cat’s confused
-I don’t wanna have any sympathy for ravonna don’t show me those stupid fuckin rings
-LMAO THE CLOCK IS PLAYING RAVONNA TOO
-why is this so funny
-knife buds
-I shouldn’t love him but I kinda do
-okay but they’re so funny just holding their knives to him
-I’m so sorry sylvie is so cute
-her little hair flips
-it’s a Loki thing
-he’s funny but I’m fairly certain I’m gonna hate him
-at least call her by her preferred name bitch
-MOBIUS MY KINGGGGG
-WHAT A BAD BITCH I FUCKIN LOVE YOU
-“one mans void is another man’s….piece of cake”
-SHES SO ANNOYEDFKSIFKS
-youre not sorry bitch
-LMAO B-15 YOU BAD FUCKING BITCH
-OMG OMG OMG PRINCIPAL NOT-RAVONNA IS SO HOT
-B-15 like I’ll expose the fuck outta your ass
-Loki I love you but this is obviously bigger than you think
-man’s a script writer omg
-ugh not him being a sylkie shipper
-man I hate u
-NOT THIS SHIT AGAIN IM TIRED
-right when they thought they could start doing their own thing and making their own decisions he’s like SIKE!!!
-I sad
-this bitch is exactly why I’m like meh on Christian god
-must be boring
-man I don’t want him to turn them against each other
-IS THIS A RELIGIOUS ALLEGORY
-ravonna is. A little unhinged
-‘an illusion conjured by the the weak to inspire fear. A desperate bid from control’
-I’m sorry but she sounds like cliche christians
-this is coming from a cradle Catholic
-why is this the mokius/Loki fight from ep 4 all over again
-she literally says crisis of faith
-mobius: hey I think this entire institution has manipulated us and I'm gonna try and figure out what's at the bottom of it
ravonna: lies to him, has him killed
ravonna: wow i cant believe he would betray me like that
-no bc its giving Aaron burr 'now I'm the villain in your history'
-its giving catra and adora in s1 when adora's like 'they're awful' and catras like 'yeah we been knew. How dare u not condone that'
-except I don't ship Mobius and ravonna
-I had to pause to write this rant
-she threatens to prune him again as if he wouldn't just go back to the void
-mobius: we can't take away ppl's free will
Ravonna: i disagree
mobius: where are u going
ravonna: in search of free will
-PICK A SIDE
-IM TIRED
-mobius being left ONCE AGAIN
-poor bitch
-everyone has evil clones just let shit happen
-why is it literally an entire religious allegory
-HW FOUND BABY ALIOTH
-im so confused
-what does the illusion of the time keepers do at all
-he fills the same spot as them either way
-is it anonymity?
-why doesn't he just kill all the bad variants of himself
-he sounds like a liar I don't trust him
-hes just an asshole
-why doesn't he offer ppl the option to work for the tva
-if he thinks they'll still work under Sylvie and Loki then he must think they'd help
-why does he look scared
-idk why but I'm real tired of all this
-time shit's confusing
-dude i just want lokius interaction
-NOOO NOT A SYLKIE FIGHT
-no I’m so ficking emo
-I want them to be besties
-“because you can’t trust. And I can’t be trusted”
-bro I’m sad
-I’m so sad ab Loki
-he’s trying so hard not to hurt her pls
-WAHHHHH
-I am going to SOB
-HE THREW HIS SWORD DOWN IM GOING TO CRY
-he’s GROWN SO MUCH
-LOUD CRYING
-that’s it I’m fucking logging out
-Disney I hate you
-I’m so fucking pissed
-I’m so tempted not to finish this episode I’m mad
-anger fills me from top to bottom
-NOT THIS AGAIN
-I am taking a moment
-are you SERIOUS
-man
-my exact words when she says ‘I’m not you’ were “AH fuck. GODdammit” but I need you to take the liberty of imagining the exhaustion in my voice
-bro I’m just so mad
-I’m like apathetic to the rest of the plot rn sorry
-I couldn’t care less ab this
-man I am so disappointed
-I’m sorry I just am
-does it really fuckin have to go like that
-god at least let me have one last Lokius moment
-Tom Hiddleston’s deliverance of that rant was so fucking good
-like. You can hear how truly fucked up he is about all this. We’ve never seen Loki like this
-I’m rly emo about it
-I’m actually going to kill marvel
-I am. Divorcing this show
-are you fucking kidding me
-no because fuck you
-FUCK YOU FUCK YOU
-I am SO ANGRY
-I am going to be pissed forever
-you fucking make MOBIUS FORGET HIM?? JUST LIKE THAT???
-GODDAMIR
-SO IS THIS MOTHERFUCKER KANG THE CONQUERER??
-I’m so tired
-I just want to take a long fucking nap
-I’m gonna spend the next few years pretending this episode doesn’t exist
-fuck everything man. I’m fucking mad I haven’t been this mad since I watched infinity war in theaters.
-with that I will be. Dying somewhere
#lokius#loki of asgard#loki spoilers#Loki#Loki episode 6#loki episode 6 spoilers#I have no more fucking words#mobius#ravonna renslayer#b-15#sylvie#I am fucking tired
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it’s late and i’m extremely fucking high and i just need to rant for a while about the fucking ✨shakespearean tragedy✨ that is the todoroki family.
because i feel like as a fandom we’re all doing too much looking for a definitive narrative that says that this one person is the bad guy (whether your choice be dabi or endeavor) and everyone else is a blameless victim and like, No. the exquisite tragedy of it all is how tragic it is for basically every member of the family and how basically everyone’s actions, while ultimately contributing to the horror, were in isolation understandable, if not excusable. (this got so fucking long i put it below a cut you’re welcome to the two people who’ll read this)
like, right off the bat we’ve got endeavor. and, hot take here, i actually think that shouto is not endeavor’s favorite kid - it was always touya. based on what we’ve seen, it looked like touya’s early training wasn’t forced, but born out of a genuine connection between touya and enji, an activity they both enjoyed. and rei commented on how touya’s personality was like enji’s, his stubbornness and his drive. and, of course, touya immediately latches on to the idea of being a hero to surpass all might. and listen, i would sell horikoshi my soul to get the backstory on where enji developed that obsession/goal, but whether it’s something that was imposed on him by someone else he cared about/internalized (like a parent displaced by all might, or a mentor, or idk) or just a goal that turned toxic after years of constantly falling short and feeling like you’re never good enough (like, oikawa @ kageyama but without an iwa-chan to pull him back from the edge), it’s fuckin toxic. but whatever, imagine it’s something you and your kid share, and it’s a bonding activity, and then you learn it’s hurting your kid. this dream you put into his head is causing him serious pain. we can make noise about how touya was like izuku and needed to hear he could be a hero too, but it’s also totally understandable, when your child is in pain, to want to make that pain stop and keep your child from getting hurt. it’s also understandable, but not excusable, to not know how to relate to your child when one of your primary shared values and goals (being a hero, hero training, etc) can’t really serve that purpose anymore. less understandable but still ~maybe understandable to have another kid (listen, my thoughts on this are either 1) the reason enji holds the goal is external, like he feels like it owes it to someone else, and well meaning but bad parents often give their children what they wanted as children, not what their children need, i.e. enji would’ve liked for someone else to shoulder the burden and so that’s what he’s giving touya, or 2) the rationale was that enji was okay with not achieving the goal as long as his family did, so he thought touya would be the same). and then when touya lashes out at shouto, the reactions are, again, not excusable but understandable. from enji’s perspective, his whole mindset and value system has given touya pain, he doesn’t know how to give touya good things, it always seems to hurt him, so he’ll withdraw from touya. keeping shouto isolated and training him so hard feels both like an obviously wrong but at least understandable way to trying to protect shouto from touya while not isolating touya further, but also to me like an exercise in punishment, of shouto as a sort of misdirected scapegoat enji on some level blames for the deterioration of things with touya, and ultimately punishment for himself because he knows he’s really at fault (self punishment because i think the manga shows that endeavor values the idea of family a lot, even if his execution is abysmal, and so the isolation from the rest of the family feels a little bit like self flagellation). understandable for enji to get mad at rei for letting touya wander off and get burned (because he’s like 12 and also seriously injuring himself, this is kind of mothering 101). and when touya “dies””, totally understandable for that to cause a huge rift in enji and rei’s relationship, for them to blame each other. never excusable for that to escalate to violence, but damn did these people need therapy. the monumental grief of feeling responsible for your child’s death??? that’s difficult for even the most emotionally well adjusted people to manage healthily. and like, obviously there were other options, but i’ll go out here and say it is both understandable and totally excusable to have rei institutionalized after she burned shouto. her level of psychosis was a danger to her children and possibly herself. (now in an ideal world the fact that enji was also a danger to the children would have been addressed by institutions but like, we’re talking people and their choices here, not systemic change). but basically, endeavor made a lot of really bad calls but at the time, with the information he had, if we’re compassionate and empathetic about it, all of those decisions are at least understandable on some level
but at the same time, SO ARE A LOT OF TOUYA’S. like, kids want to please their parents. he loved and looked up to his father and he wanted to be like him and do the things his father wanted. understandable goal. and understandable for him to want to continue training after hurting himself too. i’m sure he felt like doing otherwise would be proving he was weak or a disappointment in some way to his father, especially since hero/quirk training seemed to be their thing. understandable that he would feel angry and frustrated when his relationship with his dad suffers, in his mind proving his fears about losing his dad if he can’t be a hero to surpass all might. and totally not excusable but also totally understandable for a confused, rage-filled preteen to lash out at a new sibling who feels like a replacement. and the separation of shouto and enji from the rest of the family served to reinforce that idea too. it’s also understandable to me for touya to have a lot of blame for rei. she doesn’t stick up for touya with enji, or, really, that we’ve seen, make much of an effort to connect with him and give him an alternate outlet for the ambition and drive he had channeled into being a hero. after the fire, we have a lot of missing pieces in terms of how he survived, what happened, etc, but i also think it’s understandable for him to morph his personal anger into an anger at hero society, not least because heroes, for the rest of society, like parents for their children, are held up as paragons. it’s a connection that is wrong for a lot of reasons but feels right, because i think that dabi has the same misunderstanding of both his parents and hero society. for both, his idea is that if they’re not perfect, if they’ve failed in some way, they’re rotten at the core, instead of both heroes and parents just being people who can make mistakes. those mistakes can have horrendous consequences that they should be held accountable for, but that can coexist with a lot of good.
rei is treated a lot as a totally blameless victim, and while she’s obviously a victim of enji’s abuse, she also made a lot of bad calls that were inexcusable but also understandable. agreeing to a quirk marriage that she wouldn’t be happy in in order to help her family is understandable. she took the same approach as enji in terms of touya’s quirk, and let him set the tone for how to deal with the issue. it’s understandable, because enji was closer to touya and as she pointed out their personalities are similar, but it was also a bad call, and one she held to even when it clearly wasn’t working. my read of the manga is that rei withdrew even further after touya’s “death”, which is again understandable as she was dealing with her grief and the emergence of enji’s abuse, but also meant she failed the rest of her children.
and shouto, of course, is kind of born into a family and a life that’s already been shaped and then totally wrecked by circumstances beyond his control - first, touya’s quirk hurting his body, and then, touya’s death. and the whole while, he doesn’t even have the knowledge and context to understand why his family is the way that he is.
basically, everyone in this family makes me Sad, i don’t think any of them are pure evil fundamentally bad, irredeemable people - even though enji abused his wife and kids, even though touya went on to kill people.
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hm
Ok, so I've just finished reading through Gakuen Alice, the whole finale and everything, and I kinda feel like it was either rushed, or missing something. There were just weird elements to it, and stuff that doesn't make sense to me.
(massive spoilers for a lot of the series below, just an fyi)
So, in the finale, Mikan's been taken away from Alice Academy, and has been away from it for a couple years. She has no memory of anything from that time, though she sometimes still gets hit by intense emotions unexpectedly, most likely parts of her memory trying to get through. She's a high school student, she's 16 years old, and apparently there's recently been an incident of kidnappings in the area that seem to specifically target girls around her age.
So when she goes down to the beach with her two friends, simply called Sa-chan and Shi-chan, and a bunch of shit starts going down, there's reason to panic, right? Ahh, there's a bunch of men here that I don't know that are going to kidnap me!!! But then, another group of men that she doesn't know show up and beat them up! Whoa! Then, randomly, for some reason, one of her friends just smooshes up her face and suddenly she's an entirely different person. But that's not all. All these new strange men seem to know her, and they have crazy powers! There's one guy who just made all the kidnappers pass out with a wave of his hand! Another guy seemed to just make fire spring out of nowhere! What the fuck??
I just,, the way that Narumi and Tsubasa and Natsume and Tonouchi and fuckin,,, everyone else just seems to think it's so funny and wacky that Mikan, who does not remember any of them, is freaking out and thinking they are going to kidnap her, it bothers me. Like, imagine just going through your day, then a bunch of weird men who act like they know you surround you completely, then just laugh at you when you freak out. What the hell.
I just generally have gripes about how the characters act, basically. It's just fucking weird to me, idk. Could it be due to the fact that I read all of this within the span of maybe three days? Sure. But still.
Starting off, I just have to talk about how Natsume,,, acted? behaved? responded? something,, to Mikan. He fecking grabbed her wrist (and uh, again, she hasn't remembered who any of these people are yet) and just fuggin stares at her. Sure, that does trigger something in Mikan's memory, and she's starting to vaguely re-remember stuff, but then he just??? grabs her chest????? What????? WHy?? Would??? you??? do?? that????? I just,,, I know that he did do shit like that earlier in the series, constantly making comments about how flat her chest was (YOUR HONOR SHE'S FECKING TEN YEARS OLD WHAT'S YOUR DEFENSE) and looking down her shirt or whatever, but,, from around the first Christmas party onwards, he never pulled any of that shit. He never made comments about any of that weird shit, none of that. I (foolishly, apparently) thought that he had,, I dunno,, kinda moved on from that whole,,,, assault,,, thing,,, but no. Guess not.
And like, at this point, idk how old he would be, but probably around 17 ish years old. Wh-- why?? What,, what-- WHY DID HE DO THAT??? WHY DID HE THINK THAT WAS A CORRECT THING TO DO??? It was bad enough when they were younger and actually knew each other, it's fucking gross and uncomfortable now that they're both older and SHE DOESN'T FUCKING REMEMBER WHO THE FUCK HE IS. To her, he's just some random creep who groped her? Ah, teenage romance, what a dream~~
After that.... incident, a few other things happen, but he just fucking grabs her (she still hasn't fully realized what is going on or who any of these random men are) and fukkin yells at her for leaving the school before he woke up, all those years ago. Dude, buddy, pal, friendo, she didn't have any control over any of that shit. She wasn't the reason that Nodacchi brought him back a week or so after Mikan left, she didn't know any of that!! She was waiting that whole time, but she didn't have any control over when Nodacchi would bring back Natsume, I just,,, why. It annoys me immensely.
(i'm rereading through the whole interaction again and uh,, yeah that one panel where he's holding her and just starts talking about shit that she doesn't remember or understand and then fuggin says "You are mine"??? UH,, DUDE?? NO. STOP. Props to Mikan for not losing her shit bc I definitely would. I'd be having a panic attack or something, this is an intensely stressful situation and I just,,, The sighs that I am sighing are so intense. Disappointment is accompanying every exhale, I stg.)
It is only after Mikan absorbs that fragment of her first Alice stone that she even starts to remember stuff and I just,, I do not like it.
Moving on from that, Ruka. What's up with him. What's he been doing this whole time. Idk. He just feels weird to me. Maybe it's the fact that everyone's all grown up and all seem to be experiencing a particularly nasty case of same-face-syndrome, but he just seems so,,, bland? Empty? There's something off about it, I don't get it. I mean, at least Ruka doesn't try to do something to Mikan when she hasn't remembered who tf he is, so he has that going for him.
At least he has a purpose beyond just standing there: it's to give Mikan those earbuds that Hotaru made, and they allow for Mikan to hear Hotaru's voice which spurs her to become determined to find her. (Also apparently whenever this is all taking place, that is actually Mikan's birthday. Some point in the summer, I think? I can't say for sure without checking the wiki.) (ok so I looked at the wiki and it says her birthday is May 17th, so, yeah.)
But yeah I just,, after Mikan remembers everything and agrees that she wants to find Hotaru, the entire Class B from when Mikan was in the Alice Academy is suddenly transported there, and among the things that I saw, I saw that Nobara and Persona,,, had a kid??? What??? I'm confused. Never mind the fact that he's probably like twice her age, easily, but like,,, where tf did that come from? I don't get why that happened. It's weird. Why? Why was that a thing? I'm confused.
I'm not sure that I'm just underwhelmed, I think I'm also kinda disappointed, honestly. The series had been picking up so much steam, there were so many things going on, feelings were developing and growing, and I was completely caught up in it. But after the scene where Hotaru and Subaru sacrifice themselves so that Mikan can be with Natsume in the future I just,, wasn't really feeling it? I mean, I was crying all the way through to when Mikan was being taken out of Alice Academy, that was sad and stuff, but then the last few chapters just felt so rushed. So many things (but it also felt like too few things) were just piled on top of each other, one thing after another, I didn't feel anything. I was expecting to be elated once Mikan and Natsume were reunited, after all, that was the whole reason why Hotaru sacrificed herself. I fuckin watched him die, and I was screaming and rocking around in my chair and hyperventilating, I was caught up in all of that. But when Mikan did remember everything and stuff, I was fine. "Oh, cool. That's nice." I don't even know why, honestly.
I think, really, that (and this sounds questionable) I preferred everyone as kids. Because up to this point, they've all been kids. The way that they act are the ways that kids act (more or less, no kid should be through a fraction of what these kids were through), and I became familiar with them. But now everyone's grown up, they're almost adults, but since this is the finale, there isn't time to show how people have changed, and so they just feel one-dimensional. Like, I think one of the main reasons why Natsume's actions threw me off so much was that, like I said, it seemed like he had dropped that behavior (of um, groping, assaulting, harassment, stuff like that) kinda early on in the story. From at least the first Christmas party and onward, he never made weird comments, he just didn't do weird shit, and that's why it's so weird that that's what he decided to do. "Hey, how I can jog the memory of the girl that I fell in love with all those years ago? Well, I suppose I can grab her chest and comment on how it's bigger. That seems like a solid plan." Dude, what? No.
This whole encounter, of finding Mikan, was a thing that was thought about, almost certainly planned, for who knows how long, but it just kinda feels like they (the entire group) had like, a week, to come up with a plan to find Mikan, try to get her memories back, and then ???? something???
It's weird, I'm tired, and kinda disappointed. Which is really sad, because I really liked the story up until the finale. I almost feel like there's something else, to the story. That chapter 180 isn't the end, but that's as far as I could read it, so that's all I could get from it.
#honestly part of me was kinda scared of this#I tried to not amp up my anticipation for it too much#maybe i ended up doing it anyway#if i do end up reading this series again (which I probably will) hopefully the ending won't feel so weird#part of it might be the fact that I'm not reading the actual books (bc they only got translated up to vol. 15 or so in English)#so I'm actually reading a fan-translation so it might not be exact#but I find it hard to believe that they would just snafu the FINALE so fucking hard???#Minor grammatical errors are one thing but the entire ending of a series feeling weird underwhelming and hollow is another#idk#Maybe as I take time to think about it and take it all in I'll come another conclusion but for right now#I'm disappointed#gakuen alice#mikan sakura#natsume hyuuga#ruka nogi#hotaru imai
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