#i've had this in my drafts forever and wanted to finish it for today | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

beom-pyu · 1 year

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lust for life ☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ kang taehyun

kang taehyun x fem!reader (choi yeonjun x fem!reader) , tags: non idol au , friends to lovers , one-sided crushes , pining , fluff , nsfw , angst , friend!taehyun , bff!yeonjun , roommate!yeonjun , college au , one-sided crushes , angst , pink-haired taehyun because why not, reader is a little ditzy but you mean well!! , pwp

warnings: smut (minors dni) , cursing , fingering , drinking , service top!taehyun (i need to spread this agenda please hear me out) , unprotected sex (reader is on the pill) , sane and consensual! , car sex (i have an obsession) , reader is going thru it

"in these stolen moments, the world is mine. there's nobody here—just us together. keepin' me hot like july forever."

a/n: hiii it's been a while! i've had this in the drafts for a little bit and i finally finished it yayyyy!! also happy 520+ in just a little over a month??? ily guys with all of my heart :,,,) i hope u enjoy!!! (this has only been proofread once so plz excuse any mistakes!)

wc: 8.17k

you’ve never been a fan of pancakes. in fact, you had even won an online debate about how waffles are the better breakfast food back in middle school on some weird forum site. pancakes are just too starchy, too flimsy, and way too bland. you’d rather eat sand than willingly go out of your way to devour a plate of pancakes.

but as yeonjun hand feeds you a bite of the blueberry pancakes he made for your “friendiversary” (the friendship anniversary that you guys celebrate every year), you decide right then and there that you have become a pancake connoisseur—a devotee… a fanatic, if you will.

you hum in delight, clapping your hands in appreciation as you chew the slice of doughy goodness. yeonjun watches your reaction with hopeful eyes—those fox-like eyes, shining as the daylight from the kitchen window hits his irises, a chocolate brown ring hidden in the center. you think you can get lost in them forever: the way they bunch up when he smiles widely, the way his eyelashes frame them beautifully, the way they seem to display any and every emotion he feels. those captivating, enchanting eyes.

“does it taste okay?” yeonjun asks, his soft voice snapping you back into reality. you’re nodding quickly before you even realize it, giving him two thumbs up as you swallow the food.

“i didn’t know you were a pancake expert,” you joke, picking up your own fork to grab a strawberry off of your plate. yeonjun shakes his head with a faint smile, pushing around the food on his plate as he watches you eat.

“i just threw some things together. guess i’m just a natural, huh?” his voice is filled with feign cockiness and you find yourself giggling at the way he leans back in his seat with his arms behind his head like some 90s chick-flick jock.

he looks especially good today—you don’t know if it’s just the warm feelings surrounding your friendiversary, or if it’s the way the sun rays frame his figure, creating a halo effect around his body. he’s perfect in your eyes; his black hair falls beautifully around his face, and his cheeks are naturally flushed pink from the warm air of your shared apartment. his lips are glossy with some syrup residue and you wish for nothing more than to kiss it off of him, tasting the sweetness of his mouth as your hands find their way to his—

“—ift today, so i have to go in. i’m really sorry, y/n.”

you blink, tilting your head a bit as you rip your attention from his lips. “sorry, what did you say?”

yeonjun sighs with a small, apologetic smile, bouncing his fork in his hands. “there was no one who could cover my shift for our friendiversary, so i still have to work today.”

his voice is filled with so much guilt, and despite the deep disappointment you feel in your chest, you don’t want to make him feel any worse. he doesn’t deserve to feel that way. you guys have celebrated your friendiversary every single year for the past decade and a half. from visiting the aquarium in sixth grade, to go-karting in ninth, to climbing onto the rooftop of your apartment complex to stargaze last year; you guys have done it all. there’s nothing wrong with cutting one short, right?

“oh, that’s okay! i… i still have some cramming i need to do, so that’ll definitely keep me busy.” you wave your hand to dismiss him with a small smile before quickly spooning another strawberry into your mouth to cover up the falter of your lips. yeonjun’s shoulders untense with relief, nudging your foot under the table—the action is quick to summon butterflies in your stomach, a small warmth rising to your face from the short contact.

“i promise i’ll make it up to you, okay?” and any hint of dismay in your body dissipates with the lopsided smile he sends your way, too distracted by the fluttery stuttering of your heart and the way those eyes glimmer in the morning sunlight.

“i’m going to die.”

“you’re not going to die.”

“yes, i am. i’m going to die and it’ll be all your fault.”

taehyun deadpans you as you dramatically drape yourself across the library table, whining with your cheek pressed against the cool wood. today was supposed to be your friendiversary, and now here you are, face to face with your friend (and calculus tutor) in your stuffy campus library.

you mentally curse the current recession—yeonjun could’ve had the day off to cuddle and watch movies with you, but now he’s holed up in a dumb, understaffed clothing store.

on top of it all, calculus seems to always have the ability to literally melt your brain through your ears, feeling yourself growing more and more delirious with every number and formula you write down. there’s a reason why you’re an english major.

taehyun simply watches you throw your contained fit, his demeanor blank with the slightest hint of amusement—he’s definitely used to it by now. with one final huff, you lift your head up, grabbing your pencil with vigor as you straighten your back.

“okay, let’s do this.”

a tiny puff of laughter fills the space around you as taehyun’s lips quirk up at your immediate change of pace, his eyebrows raised with entertainment.

“you sure you don’t need another minute?” he teases you with a sly smile and you give him a tiny glare in return.

“not everyone is a mathematical nerd like you, kang,” you retort, but the words are light and airy—it’s easy to banter with taehyun. you’ve known him since your freshman year, meeting him by chance at this exact library during exam season. you approached him first—he had on a t-shirt of a band you like a little too much and with your extroverted nature, you cracked through his shell quickly.

you two would be complete opposites if it weren’t for the fact that you have so much in common with each other. he’s like the less talkative, “critically thinking”’version of you—he balances you out perfectly and you’re incredibly thankful to have a friend like him. he’s always open to listen to your rambling, help you out when you’re struggling in one of your classes, and provide silent company when you don’t want to be alone.

you’re especially grateful that he willingly offered to help you prepare for your upcoming exams, knowing how scatterbrained you get when it comes to studying—and by the time it hits 5 p.m, you’re officially burnt out, unable to intake any more explanations of radians and whatnot.

taehyun notices your attention drifting as you chew on the end of your pen, a tiny and fond smile falling onto his face.

“how about we call it a day?” taehyun asks as he closes his textbook. you immediately brighten up, nodding aggressively—taehyun quietly laughs at your enthusiasm.

“wanna get something to eat? i think i’m actually going to die after all of this now.” you motion to the mess of paper and notes in front of you, hearing taehyun hum in agreement. you pack up quickly as you randomly stuff your papers into their proper (see: random) folders, ready to get some food in your stomach as you tell taehyun about this new show you’ve started watching. he listens intently, nodding along to your breakdown of the plot—you speak way too fast for anything to be even the slightest bit comprehensible, but your eagerness makes up for any lost translations.

the air is warm on your skin when you exit the library, soaking up the heat as you fall into step with taehyun next to you. as brutal as finals season is on you, it does leave one positive in your mind—summer is coming.

you had planned a trip with yeonjun to your hometown for the first few weeks of summer—just the two of you with no distractions of work and assignments. alone. together. you were going to confess during this trip; you had promised yourself that you wouldn’t chicken out this time. you have liked yeonjun for years, ever since middle school, but you’ve been too afraid of losing him to actually tell him the truth about your feelings—but this is it. this will be the summer you tell him everything. you beam at the thought, already feeling giddy at just the idea.

“watcha thinking about?”

taehyun’s inquisitive voice enters your ears and you turn your head to look over at him. he’s already watching you, his big eyes focused on the goofy smile on your face. your neck heats up with embarrassment at the prospect of being caught daydreaming about your best friend, shaking your head.

“nothing, really. i just love when the sun’s out,” you speak, looking up to the clear sky as you silently applaud yourself for that on-the-spot excuse. you can still feel taehyun’s eyes on your face, but you brush it off as your phone rings in your hand.

you look down at the caller i.d., your heart jumping at the giant display of letters that spell out “junnie bug”. his contact photo takes up your entire screen and you’re sure taehyun sees it as well—it’s a selfie yeonjun took when he used one of your hello kitty headbands to wash his face, his lips puckered up in a kissy face with a v by his eyes, winking at the camera. god, he’s so cute.

quick to answer the phone, you press the device to your ear with a small smile on your lips, muttering out a quiet hello.

“hey, where are you right now?”

you scan the area, realizing you’re closing in on one of the campus restaurants, one you and yeonjun frequent weekly.

“i’m about to grab dinner. why?” the line is quiet for a beat as you hear some shuffling and jingling before yeonjun finally responds.

“i got off early! come eat with me. i brought your favorite~” yeonjun sing-songs through the speaker of your phone. you pout a bit, glancing up at taehyun whose hands are shoved in his pocket as he looks off into the distance, giving you privacy to speak.

“i’m actually with taehyun right now…”

yeonjun makes a small, whiny sound, quick to intervene. “but it’s our friendiversary! plus, i have something i’ve been waiting to tell you.”

your heart stops in your chest for a moment as the words reach your ears, feeling the world around you slow down.

yeonjun has something to tell you.

he has something he's been waiting to tell you.

you try not to overthink it, but you can’t stop the conclusion from jumping into your head.

he’s going to confess. he’s going to confess!

you bite back a small squeal as you gain your composure, your eyes flickering over to taehyun once again. he’s a few steps behind you and you already feel bad for what you’re about to do—but yeonjun has something to tell you and your best friend always comes first.

(especially when he’s going to confess to you!)

“okay, i’ll be there soon! love you, junnie.”

“love you too. see you in a bit.”

and then the line goes silent. you try to hide your wide grin as you turn on your heel towards taehyun who stops in his tracks, his head cocking to the side at your excited demeanor.

“hey, can we make a reign check? i’m really sorry,” you pout as you speak, but taehyun doesn’t seem fazed in the slightest, nodding his head.

“yea, that’s okay. seems like you have somewhere important to be.” the small smile he gives you seems a little forced, but you’re too blinded by the excitement pooling in your gut to linger on it. you make a small happy noise, reaching out to pat taehyun’s arm softly.

“i’ll pay for dinner next time—pinky promise.” you hold out your pinky and taehyun’s eyes follow your hand, smiling a bit at the action.

“what, are we twelve?” he teases and you huff, gently jabbing your pinky into his arm.

“pinky promises are the ultimate form of trust and commitment!” you declare with a self-assured nod. taehyun hesitates for a moment as he gives you an unreadable look before his warm pinky hooks onto yours, your thumbs pressing together in a silent seal.

“thank you, kind sir,” you say in a horrible british accent and the corners of taehyun’s eyes crinkle in that darling way they do when he smiles. “i’ll see you tomorrow. bye, bye!”

if taehyun watches your figure retreat until you’ve disappeared around the corner of the communications building, and a short while after you’re already gone—well, that’s for only him to know.

you’re nervous, you realize as you wipe your sweaty palms on your skirt, taking in a deep breath as you stand outside of your apartment. one would think you’d be prepared for this, considering how many sleepless nights you’ve tossed and turned imagining this exact moment. the exact moment when yeonjun tells you, to your face, that he has been in love with you for years—and you would confirm that you feel the same way, and all would be well and dandy and you’d finally be able to breathe.

but your breath gets caught in your lungs the moment you see yeonjun sitting on the couch with a movie paused on the screen, all of your favored dishes from your favorite takeout place laid out in an array on the glass coffee table in the middle of the living room. time moves in slow motion when his head turns towards you as you walk through the front door, those butterflies making their way back to your belly the moment his eyes lock onto yours.

he’s always so gorgeous—even after being on his feet for hours due to his long shift, he still manages to look positively effortless. his plush lips are slightly parted in a wide smile as he beckons you over, his hair bouncing on his forehead at the movement. he’s shining, the sunset casting a wonderful glow over the living room, making his pristine skin look even more angelic than it usually does.

you’re in love. you’re absolutely, absolutely enamored with the man in front of you.

it’s like a scene in a movie as you take a seat on the couch next to him, his arm coming to rest over your shoulders, pulling you into a tight side hug and… oh goodness, he smells so amazing. he’s had the same signature scent for years—a sweet grapefruit with hints of cedar and black currant. intoxicating, alluring. you subtly inhale as you bury your face in his shoulder, letting yourself bask in his warmth. his comfort.

you feel his body rumble with quiet laughter at the way you cling to him, his free hand coming up to pinch your cheek fondly.

“hello to you too,” he speaks and you pop your head up to smile at him.

“i missed you. i think i lost half of my sanity after that study session,” you mumble as you pull your knees up to your chest, pressing yourself closer to yeonjun’s side.

“wasn’t taehyun there to help, though?” yeonjun questions as he massages the back of your neck. you hum in response, your eyes slipping shut as your body relaxes.

“he’s the only reason i didn’t actually go insane,” you groan and yeonjun laughs a bit at your theatrics. “but enough of that. it’s friendiversary time!”

you try to ignore the anticipation bubbling in your chest as the night goes on. yeonjun seems to have pushed the “something” he’s been “waiting” to tell you to the back burner of his mind, laughing and joking around as per usual as some corny 2000s chick flick plays on the t.v. screen. you’re painfully aware though, your eyes glancing over at him during every bout of prolonged silence, trying to egg him on with subtle words—and by the time the movie finally ends, you think he’s forgotten completely.

but then he turns his body towards you, and if you weren’t already hyperfocused on his entire presence, you would’ve missed the way he takes a subtle deep breath, silently preparing himself for whatever he’s about to tell you. naturally, your body faces him as well, your hands in your lap as you dismiss the rapid pounding of your heart in your chest.

it’s finally happening.

yeonjun cracks a small smile to break the growing tension in the room and you swoon at the way his cheeks bunch up in that adorable way they do.

“soooo,” he starts and you can’t help but to smile a bit at his unusually awkward demeanor—choi yeonjun, you’re choi yeonjun, is actually nervous right now. something about it makes you feel a little fluttery; just the sight of his face reddening makes your stomach flip. he’s so cute.

“soooo…?” you echo, nudging his knee with yours. he chuckles a bit, one of his hands coming up to rub the back of his neck.

“remember how i said there’s something i’ve been waiting to tell you?” he speaks slowly as if he’s thinking of every word he says before they exit his mouth. you nod, trying to hide your growing grin. “so, um…”

this is it. this is it. your days of pining are finally over. you’ll be able to kiss, hug, and love yeonjun all you want, as loudly as you want. you’ll finally be his.

“i think i’m going to throw up from the suspense,” you blurt out and your words help to lighten the mood, yeonjun laughing again as his hand drops back down to his lap.

“i guess i’ll just say it then,” he inhales once before his next sentence tumbles off of his lips like an avalanche, destroying your world with every passing millisecond. you’re dunked underwater as your breath hitches in your throat, your hearing muffled as you watch yeonjun’s lips move, but none of it reaches your ears.

you can’t think. you don’t want to think. it’s all too sudden and you feel your hands tremble slightly in your lap as yeonjun’s eyes fill with adoration as he talks about the girl from his fashion department.

“we’re official. me and eunbin… we’re dating.”

he’s so happy as he lulls on about the exact moment everything happened; the way her eyes lit up, the way she jumped into his arms, the way she kissed him on the lips. how she’s so smart and mature. how she’s beautiful and confident and charming in every way. how she’s exactly what he needs at this point in his life.

how she isn’t you.

you have always kind of been aware of the fact that the girl had a crush on yeonjun. she’d always be by his side walking through campus, hanging off his arm like a koala, overly affectionate with skinship. but yeonjun was friendly too, and he’s touchy with all of his friends—it’s his love language. you’ve never thought too much of it seeing as yeonjun always returns home to you. cuddling you at night when you can’t sleep. cooking you breakfast and dinner almost every day. matching outfits with you. staying up late to talk with you.

you were just too stupid—too naive… too blinded by your own infatuation with the man to realize that his eyes weren’t set on you this entire time. you were just his comfort. his roommate. his best friend. and nothing more.

you aren’t sure if you’re still present in your body—it feels as if you’re watching the entire scene from afar, somewhere high up in the clouds. away from yeonjun. away from yourself.

you want to cry, already feeling a lump form in your throat as your waterline burns with tears, but yeonjun’s smile is the widest you’ve seen it be in a while, and those eyes… those same eyes you’ve found yourself getting lost in one too many times… they’re so big and bright tonight as he rambles on about this girl. this girl who is everything you’re not.

it feels as if your heart shrivels up and falls into your stomach right then, fighting to make a smile form on your trembling lips. you want to be joyful for your best friend—you really do—but it just hurts so, so much and you’re about to break at any second.

“i’m so happy for you, junnie,” you mumble out quietly, positive that if you speak any louder, your voice will crack and give it all away. yeonjun directs that endearing smile your way and you feel your heart break even more.

“thank you, y/n. you’re… you’re the first person i’ve told so i was a little nervous. thank you, really.” yeonjun lets out a sigh of relief as he pulls you into a hug. it should’ve been warm and cherished, filling you with nothing but precious feelings—but you can’t help that ice-cold feeling that washes over you as you inhale his citrusy cologne, patting his back with a shaky hand. when he pulls away, he has this little dazed smile on his face—he’s definitely thinking about her—and your gut churns with the ickiest feeling you’ve ever felt.

“you know it’s hard for me to open up to people,” he continues, and you aren’t sure how much longer you can sit here while holding in your tears. “but with her, it’s just like… it’s so natural and easy. she reminds me of you, actually. she always understands me in the way that you do.”

no, she doesn’t.

“i’m glad,” you mutter out and he doesn’t even process your short response, too busy lost in thought as he smiles down at his lap.

you can’t. you can’t.

“‘m gonna go to the bathroom,” you speak, standing before he even acknowledges your words. your tears are already falling down your cheeks as soon as you turn your back to him, your legs moving quicker than the speed of light as you shut the bathroom door behind you, letting it all rush out.

you muffle your quick breathing with the sleeve of your sweater so yeonjun can’t hear—you don’t want to ruin this moment for him. he’s still your best friend, and he deserves all of the happiness in the world. but you’re selfish and your heart hurts a little too much; all of those years of pining and chasing…

this truly sucks.

you don’t know how long you sit in there, but it must’ve been long enough for yeonjun to become worried seeing as a knock soon sounds from the door.

“y/n, you okay?”

you quickly pat your cheeks dry with your palm, nodding your head before remembering he can’t see you from the other side of the wall.

“yeah, ‘m just getting ready for bed!” you call out, cringing slightly at your hoarse voice. hearing an affirmative hum from yeonjun in the hallway, you turn on the sink to wash the tear tracks from your face.

now this is definitely a friendiversary to remember.

taehyun has always had a knack for being incredibly perceptive—you like to call it his “kitty senses”, the way his nose twitches cutely when he spots something in the distance, or the way he perks up when he hears something interesting. he always seems to be aware of the space and those around him, noticing the little things, and paying close attention to detail. maybe that’s the reason why he blinks so little; he’s always keeping an eye out for the minuscule things people usually overlook.

so when your laugh isn’t quite as full as it usually is, and your smile doesn’t fully reach your eyes, and your fingers keep fidgeting with the zipper of your jacket—taehyun knows something is up.

it’s not like you’re not trying to hide it. you had made sure to put on extra concealer that morning to hide your sleepy eyes from your lack of sleep, which is useless because already sure you’ll be crying it off by the end of the day. you try to joke around with taehyun as usual, but you can’t seem to stop your mind from drifting.

it hurts—it hurts so bad, and as much as you wish to just accept reality and move on, some part of you still wants to believe that this is all a dream. some horrible, horrible joke the universe decided to play on you. you just want it to all be over.

taehyun’s over at your place today. yeonjun has work until 6 and you really don’t think you can bring yourself to leave the dark, brooding coven that has become your bedroom, so you came up with a flimsy excuse of the library being too hot to study in today.

“let’s take a break,” taehyun’s voice sounds from your desk, successfully making you look up from where you’re laid stomach down on your bed. in all honesty, you’ve been repeatedly reading the same sentence for the past ten minutes, drawing the conclusion that you’re definitely not going to get anything done today.

you sigh with a small nod, moving to sit crisscross as you shut your laptop, feeling your shoulders slump. taehyun’s watching you—you can feel his eyes follow your movement as you move your laptop to your bedside table, your lips adorning a permanent frown.

you don’t even bother to check your phone as you flop backward onto your bed; it’s not yeonjun’s fault that you feel this way—you know that. he’s not responsible for the way your stomach swoops when he smiles, or the way your skin tingles when his hand lingers on your face for a little too long. it’s your fault for jumping to conclusions, for seeing everything through rose-tinted glasses.

it’s your fault for falling for him so hard.

and here comes that feeling again; that lump in your throat, the churning of your insides, the sting behind your eyes. too caught up in your own thoughts, you don’t process the dip in your bed as taehyun takes a seat next to you.

“are you alright?”

his voice is oh so soft as you turn your head to look at him—those big eyes scan over your body as he tries to read what’s wrong, seeing his kitty senses working a thousand miles a second. you catch the way his fingers twitch as if he wants to touch you, but his body is stiff with uncertainty.

you almost want to cry simply at the way he so obviously cares, his brows knit together, eyes searching yours for an answer you aren’t giving him. he’s lovely, you render, as you scoot over to give him some space to slip in next to you as you curl up to his side. it’s nothing new; you’re used to sharing a bed with taehyun to get in quick power naps during cramming, or to scroll through your phones in silence, just enjoying each other’s company.

but something feels different this time as he wraps his arm around you, his fingers tickling your arm. your head rests on his shoulder while your index finger draws random patterns on his chest, his black t-shirt bunching and scrunching up with the movement. it’s quiet as he strokes your arm, the pads of his fingers making goosebumps rise to your sensitive skin. you don’t realize how bad you need this—the warmth of his body is so nice and you can already feel your walls coming down as you sniffle, a few tears escaping your eyes.

“‘m gonna get your shirt all wet,” you mumble, and taehyun just laughs a bit, resting his head on top of yours.

“i don’t mind,” he replies quietly and you immediately break, the dam collapsing as your tears soak into his shirt, accepting all of the untamed emotions running wild inside of your body. taehyun holds you silently and gently, his thumb brushing over your skin in an attempt at solace.

heartbreak is a weird, weird thing. it feels like you’re yearning for something that you know you’ll never have. craving the touch of someone you’ll never be able to hug and kiss and love in the way you want to. you don’t believe you’ve ever felt anything like this before.

so you let yourself cry, and cry, and cry as taehyun nuzzles his cheek into your hair—a silent reminder that he’s still right here next to you.

he doesn’t ask any questions, and in a way, you’re thankful for that. what would you even say? your bestfriend broke your heart even though you guys were never together in the first place? it sounds ridiculous in any way you can think of wording it, so you bask in the silence as you let everything out.

by the time your tears slow down, your fingers are clenching the front of taehyun’s shirt like a lifeline… and he lets you hold onto him for as long as you need. you don’t know what you have ever done to deserve a friend like him. always ready to catch you when you fall, giving reassurance when you need it, and always prepared to lend a helping hand.

you find yourself lifting your head to find taehyun’s eyes already on you, his hand slipping from your arm to your waist at your movement. his eyes are clouded with apprehension, and you’re sure you look an absolute mess right now with your swollen eyes and tear-stained skin. but there is something left unsaid in the air as your eyes trail down to his pink lips; his hand grips your waist a little tighter, his big eyes flickering quickly between yours.

his eyes are different than yeonjun’s—while yeonjun’s are filled with memories of home and familiarity, taehyun’s are present and swirling with unadulterated want. he wants to be here with you.

everything is muted save for your air conditioning, the quiet hum from the fan of taehyun’s laptop sitting on your desk, and the pounding of your heartbeat in your ears.

you shouldn’t do it. you know this is a bad, bad, bad idea. you’re still not over yeonjun—you’re not ready to move on yet. but that feeling of heartbreak and pure longing wraps around your brain and you just need something, someone to make it all pause. the feeling of taehyun’s hand on your waist is grounding as his thumb brushes over your your clothed skin, his dark brown irises still fixated on you, waiting. and waiting. and waiting.

your lips are on his before you can give anything another thought.

he kisses you as delicately as he holds you, giving you the lead, and allowing you to take whatever you want from him. his lips are incredibly soft—you taste his vanilla and peppermint chapstick on your tongue, getting lost in the slightly tingly sensation. your mind is hazy as your hand trails up from his chest to the side of his neck, feeling his pulse under the pads of your fingers, pressing closer to him to deepen the kiss.

his tongue swipes across your bottom lip in silent permission and you gladly give in, parting your lips for him. a quiet moan slips out as his free hand tugs your thigh over his waist, moving you to straddle him. his body is firm and sturdy underneath you, your hands falling to his shoulders as you steady yourself.

it should end here… it really should—but then taehyun tilts his head and takes your bottom lip in between his teeth and his hands are so heavy and pleasant on your waist and you’re reminded of citrus and home and…

he pulls away slowly, his chest rising and falling quickly as he stares up at your figure.

“y/n…”

his breathy voice quickly makes you come to your senses.

guilt overrides your body as you realize—you just took advantage of your friend’s kindness and company, all because of your own stupid feelings. a grave emotion washes over you as you shake your head, quickly moving off of his body as taehyun sits up.

because only then does it dawn on you that you were pretending taehyun’s lips were yeonjun’s.

“hey, hey, it’s okay—”

“no, i can’t—fuck, i’m so sorry, taehyun,” you spill out as you climb off of him, creating distance between the two of you, unable to meet his hurt eyes. you don’t want to cry again, but the stinging behind your eyes comes back in full force. the shame is too much; taehyun is so kind and you just—you used him for temporary validation. “you should… you should go.”

taehyun is silent and you see him nod in the peripheral of your vision, lingering for a second before he slips off of your bed. he’s quiet and quick as he collects his things, and your eyes only watch his figure once his back is turned toward you. you try to pretend you don’t notice the weighted gaze he gives you before leaving.

it’ll give you one less thing to cry about tonight.

you need another drink.

the slight buzz in your body is not enough to blur out the sight in front of you as you lean against the wall holding a plastic cup tightly in your hand. you’ve never really had a problem with pda—if couples want to show their admiration for each other in public, then so be it. it isn’t any of your business, truly.

but now, your stomach seems to lurch as you watch eunbin kiss up yeonjun’s neck, sitting prettily in his lap on the living room couch as yeonjun smiles that perfect smile at something she whispers in his ear. theoretically, you can simply look away, or walk away, even—but your feet stay planted where they are as your hands shake slightly.

you aren’t sure how long heartbreak is supposed to linger, or how long it should take before you stop thinking about how that could’ve been you… should’ve been you. jealousy is one hell of an emotion, and you try your absolute best to keep it at bay; yeonjun owes you nothing, but the spite eats away at you as you bring your nearly empty drink back up to your lips.

a body shuffles up next to you, but you don’t pay them any mind, your ears ringing with the pulse of the music reverberating through the walls. you’re definitely not drunk enough to enjoy the atmosphere, too hyperfocused on the way yeonjun’s head tips back in a hearty laugh as eunbin swats at his chest playfully.

“you look like you need some air.”

your head whips to the side at the words, coming face-to-face with taehyun, his eyes holding a type of intensity you’ve never seen before. a dejected laugh leaves your lips as you tilt your head back, nodding slightly in response.

“yeah, i probably do.”

taehyun’s hand is slipping into yours before you can even process his grip, tugging you towards the front door of the house. there aren’t too many people in the front yard—just a small group passing a blunt on the porch, someone in an intense argument on the phone, and a few people loitering by their cars.

you follow taehyun to the steps of the porch, taking a seat on the cement. it’s dark out, but the air is still slightly humid, making your skin feel sticky and warm. taehyun’s hand is still in yours as you scoot closer to him to allow some people to walk up the other half of the steps, your thigh pressing against his.

he’s silent as he looks ahead, and you can feel tension filling in the space around you both. it’s been a couple of weeks since you two have spoken—you’ve felt too guilty to face him after that kiss, but now you find yourself looking over at his figure. maybe the alcohol is working better than you thought.

his brows are slightly furrowed, one of his legs bouncing up and down incessantly. the low glow of the porch light illuminates him in a way that makes it impossible to look away, your eyes trailing from his cat-like eyes, to the slope of his nose, to his soft lips.

his soft lips.

you rip your eyes away from them. you aren’t going to make the same mistake twice.

“y/n, did i do something wrong?” taehyun questions quietly, his eyes finally landing on your face. there’s something cloudy and uncertain behind them, something that you can’t quite put a name to.

“no, taehyun, you didn’t—it’s not your fault. i’m just…” you sigh, your gaze focusing on the way his thumb brushes over the back of your hand. “there’s a lot on my mind right now.”

taehyun nods slowly, turning his head away from you again.

“is there anything i can do to help?”

he doesn’t mention the kiss. he doesn’t mention the way you’ve practically been avoiding his existence.

you don’t know if it’s your tipsy state, or if it’s the way his body heat radiates onto you or the way his eyes flicker back up to yours when you’re quiet for a second—but then you catch the way they travel down to your lips and you’re in the backseat of his car in the blink of an eye.

it’s warm, too warm, as you straddle his lap, your hands tangled into his hair as he kisses down your neck, hands on your hips to steady you. you don’t want to think anymore—you don’t want to hang onto something you’ll never have.

so you let taehyun distract you at this moment.

“you can use me however you’d like,” he breathes out heavily as your hands come to rest on his chest. “use me to get over him.”

your body stiffens as the words slip out of his mouth, meeting his eyes in the darkness of the car.

“how… how did you…?” your voice is breathless as you trail off, the corners of his lips quirking up into a sad smile.

“i’ve always noticed the way you look at him, y/n.”

your eyes are unfocused in the low light as you gaze at taehyun’s state, his pupils blown wide in the darkness of the car, only a side of his face lit up golden from the street lights outside. his lips are bright pink and bitten raw, his fading pink hair messy and falling onto his forehead in fluffy waves. he’s always been gorgeous, a fact you could never deny, but in this moment, he looks absolutely unreal.

sudden guilt fills your chest at the thought, shaking your head quickly.

“i can’t do that to you, taehyun,” you replied weakly. he’s shaking his head now, his big hand coming up to cup your cheek, thumb brushing your soft skin delicately.

“i want you to. i hate seeing you like this,” his hand drops down to cover one of yours, feeling his chest rise and fall under your palm. “i’ll do anything you want me to, y/n. you just have to say the words.”

his voice is low and faint, gazing at you with his pretty brown eyes. they flicker in between yours, trying to read the emotions on your face in the limited light. you nibble on your lip as you feel his rapid heartbeat through his shirt, your mind scattered and dizzy.

“please. let me help you.”

a hot flash courses through your body at the pure desperation in his voice—and something in you snaps at that exact moment, your lips crashing onto his vanilla and peppermint ones. the kiss is messy and feverish as your hands run up and down his torso, teeth clashing with the vehemence of it all. you feel his hands drop to your hips, holding you down onto him as his tongue explores your mouth, running across your teeth, swiping across your lips. he tastes like cheap liquor, and you’re sure you do too, but it doesn’t matter at this moment.

you press down on him, your hands running over his toned stomach, up to his pecs, over his shoulders; anything you can reach. you shut your mind off, not letting yourself focus on anything other than taehyun taehyun taehyun taehyun.

he’s moving you, you realize as your back presses against the cool leather of his back seat. he doesn’t break the kiss once as he hovers over you, hiking your skirt up to run his hand up your leg, running his nails over the sensitive skin of your thigh. you allow your legs to fall open so he can comfortably slot himself in between them, feeling his bulge press against your pulsing core just right.

a faint gasp leaves your lips as he grinds against your clothed cunt, already feeling yourself leaking through the thin fabric. one of your legs wraps around him to pull him even closer to you, drowning out all of your senses with the scent of his cologne, his hair tickling your cheek as he kisses down your neck. his hand leaves your thigh to slip under your top before his fingers dance over your stomach, brushing over your bra—admiring every inch of you as you arch up into his touch.

“tell me what you want, baby,” he pants against your neck, nipping the flesh there. you stifle a moan as his fingers brush over the wet spot on your panties. “come on, use your words.”

“i want… fuck—i want your fingers in me.”

he’s quick to obey, pushing your panties to the side to rub his middle finger up and down your dripping slit, a low groan leaving his lips as your hand finds its way to his hair, tugging at the pink strands to hurry him up.

you moan softly as he slips his first finger in, curling it upwards as he pumps in and out of your clenching hole. the car is filled with the sounds of your soaked cunt, his heavy pants, and your moans as he finger fucks you, slipping in another two easily with how wet you are. his fingers are incredibly long and slender, reaching parts of you that you’ve never been able to hit by yourself.

when his lips find yours again, it’s much slower, his fingers matching the restrained pace as he kisses you deeply, devouring all of your little noises. your hips buck up as his thumb rubs circles onto your swollen clit, your fingers tightening in his hair.

he seems to be in no rush as he takes you apart slowly, hitting that spot inside of you perfectly as you leak onto his seat, body shaking with pleasure. there’s a small smile resting on his lips when he pulls back to peer down at you, taking in the way your lips part and your brows furrow as he speeds up, pressing down on your clit just right.

you can’t control the noises leaving your lips as you grind onto his hand, chasing your high as he pumps into you. his actions don’t slow down when he moves up to capture your lips again, curling his fingers inside of you as his thumb rubs your clit. you grab his biceps, needing something to ground you as you feel your impending orgasm rushing upon you.

“taehyun—fuck, ‘m cumming…”

he swallows all of your moans as you tip over the edge, your back arching up into his hold as white fills your vision. you can hear the gentle praise leaving his lips through the ringing of your ears, your body left feeling fuzzy and warm as his fingers slow before gradually pulling out of your sensitive hole.

“so good for me,” he mutters against your lips, his own traveling down your jaw. you feel dizzy as you catch your breath, leaning into his touch.

“i need you,” you mumble as he lifts his head to catch your gaze. he looks completely enamored, his big eyes glossy, reflecting the light from the street lamps outside. “i need you in me. fuck me, taehyun.”

he smiles before sitting back to undo his pants. “anything you want, baby.”

it’s all a blur as he’s back on top of you again, his length hard and throbbing against his stomach as he captures your lips again. his hands roam every piece of your skin he can touch, sucking marks onto your collarbone. claiming you.

you reach down to grab his heavy dick in your hand, stroking him a few times. he sighs lowly in your ear, whispering praise and encouragement that just turns you on even more. it’s hard to be patient when taehyun is bucking up into your hand, your mind clouding up by his hot tongue trailing over your skin. he seems to sense your urgency, placing one last kiss on your lips before lining up with your entrance.

“i’ve got you,” he whispers as if his voice was only made for you to hear. you nod quickly, wrapping your arms around his neck as he presses his forehead against yours. the heat radiating from his body manages to make your clothed, scorching skin even warmer, moaning out softly once you feel him push into you. his eyes flutter shut as you clench around him. “fuck—you feel so good.”

you bite your lip to keep quiet as he slowly thrusts into you, wrapping your other leg around his waist as if it would bring you impossibly closer to him. your fingers tangle gently in his hair, tugging slightly in a way that drives him absolutely crazy.

soft grunts leave his lips once he speeds up, the sound of skin on skin drowning out the muffled music in the distance. your eyes are half-lidded as you strain to keep them open, wanting to watch the way his jaw clenches and his brows furrow. it’s all too much as you take in the fluttery tickles of his lips on your cheek and jaw, the way he stretches you out with his thick cock, the way his hands tightly grip onto your waist as if you could disappear at any moment.

every thrust into your heat makes your stomach flip with pleasure, getting lost in the feeling of his hips snapping against yours perfectly. he kisses you once more before he leans back, hands slipping down your hips to fuck you even harder, the car rocking with his strokes. you can’t control your sounds anymore, getting closer and closer to the edge with every move. you can tell he’s getting close too by the way his rhythm falters — his grip on you is tight, and you know there would be marks to cover up by the morning.

“‘m so close,” you squeak out as he intertwines one of your hands, his other forearm resting by your head to lean down to kiss your lips again.

“me too, baby,” he speaks against your lips, his hips stuttering. “you’re so perfect, y/n, fuck.”

you can already feel your high crashing upon you with one last stroke, your own whimpers falling deaf to your ears as his words tip you over the edge. your body buzzes with electricity as you clench around him, feeling him pump his thick ropes of cum into you at the action, his moans high and breathy in your ear as you cum together.

it takes you a second to come back to your surroundings, blinking your eyes open to see taehyun watching you, silently stroking your hair. he’s still nestled inside of you, but you don’t really mind. he leans down to capture your lips again—it’s passionate and unrushed as he tries to convey every single emotion he’s feeling, his hands coming up to cradle your face.

you can’t think of anything other than the way your heart flutters as he breaks the kiss to rest his forehead against yours, his breathing still uneven as his eyes open to gaze into yours.

“thank you,” you whisper, your stomach swooping as he smiles, that dimple on his right cheek peeking out in the darkness.

“don’t thank me,” and his voice is dripping with so much sincerity, you find yourself unable to look away from his eyes, your hand coming up to rest on top of his. with a small giggle, you glance down at your intertwined bodies.

“i think we should clean up,” you speak light-heartedly as your nose brushes taehyun’s, and he lets out a small puff of laughter, nodding in agreement.

you don’t know what any of this means anymore—how your heart flutters at the way taehyun gently cleans you up before pulling you back in his lap to kiss you silly, how he drives you home, walking you up to your door with your fingers interlaced with his. how you linger for a moment, not wanting to leave his side so soon even though you can barely keep your eyes open long enough to unlock the front door.

but all you know is that yeonjun doesn’t cross your mind again for the rest of the night.

reblogs are very much appreciated!

masterlist

©️BEOM-PYU

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differentclasss · 6 months

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Domesticity ♡ Jonathan Crane (smut)

pairing: Jonathan Crane (Nolan Verse) x Reader

summary: Jonathan really wants to get you pregnant, it takes a little convincing for you to take it seriously.

warnings: somewhat possessive behavior from Crane, talk of pregnancy, smut, female reader, just the usual stuff! also, it's not really a warning, but its a pretty simple fluff-smut fic. It's kind of out of character lol.

a/n: sorry for not posting very often, i've been doing really important stuff and definitely not just rewatching the Sopranos again... anyways, I'll probably start posting again since I'm out of a creative funk and have like a million drafts in my docs right now. thanks!

word count: 1.7k

It was soft and gray outside by the time Jonathan got home. The sky was full of clouds and the house was quiet. He put down his briefcase and untied his shoes as he walked into the quiet apartment he shared with you. He could feel this distinct sense of neediness for you he’s become accustomed to when he has a long day. Something was comforting about you, something he couldn’t place his finger on, but you made him happy. It was what most would consider love, but for him, it was all too new for him to name it.

You were laying on your stomach with your elbows perched on the mattress of your soft bed as you read some book Jonathan had recommended to you. You wouldn’t have noticed Jonathan had returned if he hadn’t dragged your attention from the book laid out in front of you by clearing his throat as he walked into your shared bedroom. You looked up at him with that same doting smile you had whenever you saw him and made your way to him. He glanced over at you as he began to take off his tie but your hands quickly replaced his.

“Wait,” You said as you stood in front of him. “Let me do it.”

“Whatever you want.” He replied as if he was doing you a favor.

Truth be told, he liked your desire to do small things for him. There were little things you did that meant you cared about him, despite how cold and cranky he could be occasionally. He would find his glasses cleaned after going to shower or you would get his favorite suits dry cleaned without him even saying anything about it. All those little acts of domesticity he admired in private. He had his acts of fondness as well, he’d stop and pick you up a small treat on his way home and sometimes if he was feeling especially romantic, he would place a vase and flowers out on the kitchen table for you. There were plenty of silent acts of a proper home life that you both devoted time to.

“How was work?” You asked him once you finished taking off his tie and placed it on the dresser.

“It was fine.” He said before giving you a quick kiss on the forehead.

He hated talking about work with you, it was better to keep it vague and short. Anytime you prodded for more detailed responses he would brush it out with a simple, ‘patient confidentiality.’

“I missed you today.” You softly murmured as you wrapped your arms around him and rested your head on his chest.

“Likewise.” He said while slowly caressing your hair.

It was easy for him to just think about you during these moments, with your warmth enrapturing him in a spiderweb of affection. He could put off his alter ego for a night of your intimacy and during these nights, he often thought about how easy it would be just to enjoy you and enjoy the life you could have together. Seeing you so sweet on him made him want to keep you like this forever, something more binding than just living together.

“Thought about you all day.” He softly murmured against your neck as he pulled you over top of him on the bed.

“Yeah?” You asked with a teasing smile. “What in particular?” You asked.

“Thought about you just like this,” He replied, pulling you closer till there was practically no room between you, chest to chest. “You look so pretty.” He added.

You loved his praise, even the simplest of words made you get butterflies like how you did when you first met him. Knowing he was known as cold and bitter to most made it all the more special to hear him speak so fondly of you. You kissed the side of his neck and let out a content sigh as his hands slipped underneath your shirt and fondled your breasts for a moment. You let your neck fall back as he began to kiss the side of your neck and worked his way to your jaw. His teeth sunk suddenly into your jaw which caused you to hiss.

“I was thinking about another thing too,” He added as he pulled away for a moment. “I kept on thinking about how much prettier you’d look with my come in you.” He mumbled the last bit and it made you blush deeply.

“Jon,” You said with a small smile, your hand grazing his cheek. “We’re not married yet, you already wanna knock me up?”

“Don’t be so old-fashioned,” He said as he quickly maneuvered your body to be under his. “It’s just an idea.” He replied as he buried his face into your neck and began to kiss it with a certain amount of passion.

“I’m not against it.” You said quietly as your hands ran down his shoulders. “Just… Are you serious? That’s a big step for us.”

“Of course, I’m being serious.” He says as he pulls from your neck and gazes at you. “I gave myself a hard-on today just thinking about what’d it be like to see you pregnant with my kid.”

You couldn’t help but smile at the declaration. You always had figured he wasn’t one to even think about settling down, that just didn’t seem like him at all, but here he was, talking about having a child with you.

“Never thought I would hear you say something so affectionate.” You giggled and kissed his cheek.

“Can’t help myself.” He murmured as he kissed your lips and then pulled back. “Maybe I just want to marry you and get you pregnant. Have you here taking care of our kid and being a good little mother.”

He kissed you harder than before, clearly getting worked up over the thought of you as a mother. You didn’t mind the thought he had. It made you feel desired beyond just sexual attraction, to want to procreate meant something deeper than moving in with each other or having a pair of his shoes next to yours in the closet.

“Do you want me to dress up in a pin-up dress and wear pearls too?” You asked with a giggle, to which he bit your lip for.

“Don’t tease.” He reprimanded.

Based on his growing erection, he probably did want you to wear the dress and kitten heels, maybe not all the time but just to take it off. Jonathan got needier as he felt you through your clothes. He took your shorts off and discarded them carelessly before rubbing you through your panties. You grunted and pushed your hips to his hands.

“You do want it,” Jonathan mused as he felt your soaked panties. “You just wanna be a housewife with your cunt full of my come, hm?”

“Jonathan,” You mewled. “Just wanna make you happy.”

“You are making me happy,” He said with a small grin as he slipped his hands underneath the seam of your panties and pumped two fingers into you quickly. “It would make me a lot happier to see you nice and pregnant though.”

Jonathan loved how he barely had to touch you to get you into a whimpering mess underneath him. Your face always flushed into a pretty shade of red and your hands held onto him tightly whenever he gave you his fingers. Little moans and whines escaped your lips, no matter how hard you tried to conceal them. His hands left you for a moment as he took off his belt and then took off your shirt, making another short moan of neediness escape your lips.

“Can I come in you tonight?” He asked as he touched the bottom of your stomach, already imagining a phantom bump. “You’d make a great mother.”

Frantically you nodded, hands falling to his chest and pulling off his shirt. He worked on his pants and tossed them to the floor. You kissed him swiftly once he was as bare as you were and felt him hold your leg by the back of your knee as he teased you with more small pumps of his fingers.

“Tell me you want it as bad as I do, sweetheart.” He told you in a hushed voice.

“I want it,” You replied in a whisper. “Wanna have your baby.”

He didn’t need much confirmation after that. Hastily he moved your legs over his shoulders, knowing this position would let him get deep inside of you. Jonathan lined himself up and slowly filled your cunt up with his cock. You quickly inhaled and grabbed his shoulders for some support as he rocked into you. You moaned and felt tears in your eyes from the pressure in your cunt. He sneaked his hand to clit and rubbed it quickly, making everything seem a tad overwhelming. With your orgasm building sharply, you closed your eyes tightly as your cunt clenched around him, making both of you shiver. His hand kept circling your clit making feel more than overwhelmed at this point.

“That’s it,” He grunted from over the top of you. “Gonna make you a mommy, make you full.”

You inhaled in response, his hips coming down into you faster and faster. A few curses tumbled from your lips as another orgasm approached. Sweat began to form at your temple and once the separate orgasm came and went, your legs trembled.

“I’m so close,” He warned you in a hoarse voice. “Fuck, just gonna fill you up with my come and make you mine completely.”

You were too overstimulated to really hear what he was saying, everything blurred together at that moment. He gave you a few more unforgiving thrusts and then came inside of you, holding himself still for a moment to keep it all there. You caught your breaths together and kissed you on the forehead.

“Thank you.” He murmured as he lifted off of you and laid down beside you.

You smiled and then gave him a small kiss on the lips and went to the bathroom, feeling a bit shaky but strangely content with this new declaration. After you cleaned up you went and laid back down with him. He seemed miles away again, eyes fixed on the drawn blinds of your window. You couldn’t tell if he was feeling guilt or maybe a tinge of worry after all of that but you just nestled your head into his chest, listening to his heartbeat.

#jonathan crane x reader #jonathan crane smut #jonathan crane #jonathan crane x you #jonathan crane fanfic

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cinnamonest · 4 months

Text

Okay so! I appreciate all of the messages everyone has sent me, thank you for that <3

I just got back and have been looking at my notifications, I also got a lot of questions, some of which were recurring so I figured I can make one post addressing them:

>What happened

I'm fine, my guess is my working circumstances + short daylight hours triggered some kind of prolonged depressive phase. I am type II bipolar (I can't recall if I've ever mentioned that here or not), so I have regular manic and depressive phases, they're just not usually so intense. I'm seeing my psychiatrist in a month so I'm going to ask her for her thoughts on avoiding it reoccuring.

> Have I played fontaine arc

Unfortunately I'm not caught up, due to the aforementioned issues I also neglected hobbies/media consumption and haven't logged in in a while. I intend to get to this soon and then I can answer stuff about it!

> Did I finish HxH/am I going to make HxH content

Yes I did! I had a few eps left when I went into the depressive phase, so I just picked it back up and finished it while I was traveling this weekend.

I really enjoyed it, so I'd love to write content for it (if that's what The People™ want as well? Let me know)

> Have I played HSR

Unfortunately I can't play Star Rail because it's not on PS4 :( I hope to save up for a PS5 so when I can get one, I'll play it.

> What am I working on

There's a few things I'm either actively on or would like to do!

1) proofreading Diluc escape fic I've had sitting around forever (will post today or tomorrow)

2) another Hybrid post I started a while back (almost done)

3) I haven't checked on it in a while, so I was pleasantly surprised to learn Malebolge (the Morax failed escape fic) is by far the most popular thing I've ever written, a lot of people wanted a sequel so I've started the bare bones drafting of a sequel for it.

4) I might go back and finish the scara failed escape fic I mentioned all the way back in late 2022, I eventually got over the heel-turn dislike I developed (read: I have erased everything post 2.1 from my brain), I was already like 10k words into it so it feels like a waste to not do so. But I'm not sure, I'll just have to see how it goes

5) Sifting through old WIPs/drafts to maybe finish some, maybe start making hxh content etc

#I have a lot of 'started and never finished' writing projects #God decided being a bipolar autist wasnt enough to counteract my sins and triple nerfed me by adding ADHD

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gayuu-the-necromancer · 3 months

Text

｡⋆｡˚🦋˚｡⋆｡

I guess, it happened 4 years ago. Before we joined the Crown.

On the night I drifted into London town, he was looking up at the moon as I was passing the bridge looking for a place to stay.

I looked at his vacant profile and thought he was going to fall straight into the river after he finished his cigarette.

So I asked...

Ellis: "Are you happy?"

Jude: "...What if I am?"

Ellis: "I will make your happiness....last forever."

Jude: "Hah? What the hell are you saying? Are you crazy?"

Jude: "..Make your happiness last forever. Yeah right----"

...........

Victor: "Working again, today? I know you said about this before, but I didn't realize you both were going to be this busy."

The Crown castle in the early morning, Victor comes to the dining room for breakfast.

The two had already finished their breakfast very early and were about to go out when they were called by Victor, who walks by them.

Ellis: "Sorry Victor. We'll be back in the evening and ask about our mission then."

Victor: "Sure sure, no problem! I'm just glad you both look healthy!"

Jude: "How annoying. You don't have to apologize all the time to this weirdo."

Victor: "Why are you so salty all the time, Jude? But then again, you're cute when you're salty too."

Jude: "Disgusting."

Ellis: "See you later."

They both left the castle, both showing different expressions.

Liam: "I'm impressed how you never get discouraged when they act like that to you everyday, Victor."

Victor: "Well, I'm the one who recruited them."

Liam: "I joined the Crown on the condition that I could keep my job but those two seem busier than me."

Liam: "Can they really make time for the Crown's missions?"

It's been a few days since Ellis and Jude joined the team and they haven't even completed their first mission.

William: "Well, it doesn't matter when you do your first mission."

Harrison: "....Hey, can we really trust them?"

William: "What do you mean?"

Harrison: " I mean he's a businessman, but I've heard some dubious rumors. I heard he's got a lot of enemies here and there."

Liam: "I heard that too. It's sometimes rumored amongst my fellow actors."

Liam: "Some aristocrat got swindled and had all his money squeezed out of him."

Harrison: "If only he was a crooked businessman, it would have been fine..."

Harrison: "If he's a spy, we can't sit idly by."

Victor: "You don't trust me too?"

Harrison: "You're a weirdo, but I know you're a good judge of character. It's just that..."

Victor: "!! William, did you see that!? Harry just complimented me!!!"

William: "Yes, I saw. But let him finish his sentence..."

Victor: "Right! Please continue!"

Harrison: "....you're a real pain in the ass."

Harrison: "I'm just saying that his background is too suspicious to warrant unquestioning confidence."

Harrison: "Wouldn't it be better not to let those two act independently too much?"

Victor: "Hmmm...well....I don't want to restrict their freedom too much."

William: "Why don't you find that yourself? See if they are trustworthy or not."

Victor: "Wow!!! ....that's a great idea!"

Liam: "Aha, looks like the start of something, right?"

Harrison: *sighs* ".....I have a bad feeling about this."

...............

Victor: "Are all my Curselings here? Okay, let's start Mission Impossible: Jude and Ellis."

Liam: "Yayyh!!" *clap clap clap*

Alphonse: "Another one of Lord Victor's bullshit project? Wow, I'm so excited."

Victor: "I want all of you to observe them and report back to me."

Victor: "The main goal for us, is to see 'are they fit to be the Crown members or not'."

Harrison: "Tch...I shouldn't have said anything. I'm busy as hell."

Elbert: ".....Are you busy?"

Alphonse: "You mean you proofreading? But if I recall correctly, there is not deadline and the first draft from the writer haven't been received yet."

Alphonse: "I don't think he said you had to wait all night to finish your work."

Liam: "Wouldn't it be nice if Harry is the leader?"

Liam: "The investigation will be done by all the members except for Harry."

Alphonse: "Sneaking missions? Sounds fun."

Elbert: "I don't mind too."

Roger: "Sounds good, right?"

Harrison: "....Hey when did that happen?"

William: "But now that we have come this far, why not?"

Harrison: ".....Okay."

Victor: "Then! The Mission Impossible: Jude and Ellis, have begun!"

#ikemen series #cybird ikemen #cybird otome #otome #cybird #ikemen villain #ikemen villains #ikemen villains jude #ikemen villains ellis

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gurugirl · 1 month

Note

Heya girlie!! I hope you’re having the loviest day and have been drinking plenty of water💓 cheeky nosey question? Do you have anything sitting in your drafts that you’re undecided on posting?👀 or any concepts you’ve thought of or like that you might put out soon!

OH HI! I'm having a good good day yes! Just writing and sipping some iced coffee with my dog next to me so I have no complaints. I haven't had any actual water today but iced coffee counts yeah? 😬 I hope you're also keeping hydrated and having a lovely day :)

And I love these cheeky nosy questions!! Do I have anything sitting in my drafts??? Does this answer your question? 🤭

Let's see...

Of the things in my drafts that I feel like I can talk about (buckle up, it gets wild!)

I've got another subrry that's partly done (based on this couple),

I've got an extra part to go with this but it's not finished,

I have a few requests for a bunch of things that are really similar that I didn't share because I started writing them but never finished - and still intend on getting to them,

an idea with a housesitter!yn I started cooking up based on a cute/cheesy movie from the 90s with Goldie Hawn and Steve Martin (🙈) called Housesitter.

AS WELL as another idea I started based on another 90s late 80s (just checked and this one is 1987 lol) movie with Michael J Fox called Secret of My Success (I don't know what to tell y'all, sometimes I just go off the rails and start something to make it my own and it's based on cheesy older movies but I can't help myself 😂),

military!harry x military!reader

A Don't Stand So Close check where Harry grows a bit of a mustache

a stepdad!h idea someone sent me with a lingerie shopping spree

a MFM threesome idea I've been working on FOREVER

the beginning of a part 2 to Sex Ed with Harry that never got finished

a body guard harry (but i wanted to wait bc it was at a time when there were a bunch of body guard harrys coming out and I didn't want to feel like i was competing with the other amazing authors already doing it and doing it better most likely lol

a request for harry x his wife's best friend 🫣 that I have two versions of and cannot figure out how to finish and also wanted to give y'all a break from the cheating trope for a bit

hitman!harry who's very protective of yn and she has no idea he has feelings for her (or that he's a hitman) until one day she's in trouble and he saves her 👀

dark!harry who's your bartender and winds up talking you into going home with him and things get... interesting but you wind up LOVING it - felt a lot like MCC Harry with those kidnapping vibes (even tho yn doesn't get kidnapped it felt too similar at the time so I didn't finish it)

Phew! So that's some of what I've got in there. That's not to mention what I've got in my actual Word docs drafts (that's where I have most of my WIPs and unposted, unfinished fics). Potentially I could just hit post on some of the things but uffff!!! I really prefer everything to be readable and perfect.

Is there anything on this list y'all would be interested in currently??

xoxo

#ask #xoxo

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soft-hard-peaches · 1 year

Text

Reaction: You Changing Your Hair Style

Note: long time no see everyone! i've really miss making fic so i'm posting things i've had drafted forever ago lol. i'm a bit rusty but wrting again was fun.

+fluff+ +crack+

Kim Hongjoong

>”can’t”

>...

“whyyy”

>”Busy thats why but i should be done by 7”

>”Busy? You have no life thooo”

You ignore his last message. You weren’t going to dignify that with a response. You put down your phone and look at yourself in the mirror. Hair fully saturated with drugstore box dye, forehead stained messily, and adorning an old no longer white tee shirt that you never gave back to your ex. Usually you ask your bestfriend Hongjoong for color recommendations but you have a sudden burst of energy and now youre here I guess lol. You laughed at your appearance thinking would a person with no life clear up their busy schedule to dye their own hair because paying a professional sounds ridiculous and expensive. Once the laughter dies down you start to have second thoughts on your logic and skill set but you are already twenty minutes into the process so you must see it through.

*VRRRR* The vibration grains your attention downwards. You unlock your phone to see the full message for Hongjoong.

>”I’m bringing your favorite for dinner as an early apology because I might be late since my boss wants me to head back to the studio for a bit.”

“Thank god!’’, you exclaimed. This means you have more time to talk yourself into thinking this was a good idea again and hop in the shower to finish this possible disaster. As you stain your porcelain white tub with colorful dye you think of Joong’s possible reaction. In all the years of your friendship, you’ve really admired his sense of fashion and eye for art. You don’t put him on a pudistal but you look up to his opinion. Maybe you were too confident thinking you could both choose a color and dye your whole head by yourself but you hopped out and headed to the mirror to see the finished product.

You gasped at your reflection, covering your mouth as you muffled yourself. “It’s actually cute”, you say, uncovering your mouth. You needed some more convincing so you grabbed your hair products to style it into something presentable for the hour or so. After styling your hair, you change into something not discolored and cover up the clumsy stains on your forehead just in time to hear your doorbell. It’s time to show off your totally perfectly planned dye job to Joongie.

You practically swung the door open giving a little pose for a startled Hongjoong. "So this was why you were so busy today!” He laughed holding the hot food, shimmying into the apartment. You grabbed the bags to place on the table so he stopped to marvel at your work. “Y/N, you really should pick my next color.”

His words were an ego boost.

Park Seonghwa

Every now and again you’d visit your boyfriend in the practice room to keep him company during his long practice hours. You would bring him something to eat or drink to keep his energy up and tell him about your day. He enjoyed this time together as much as you do. With both of your schedules usually clashing, this is one of the few moments of the week that you can enjoy one another.

He sat down in front of you admiring the vibrancy in your hair.

"…what?", you sheepishly ask.

He doesn't respond yet, still gazing at your beauty. Wide eyed and enamored.

"What??", you slap your hand on the dance floor between you two trying to gain his attention.

In attempts to play it off cool, he shoots you a smirk, "N-nothing. You just look really good in this color." You both cringe slightly at his corny behavior as he lets out a breathy laugh, looking away finally. You smile knowing his compliment was genuine.

Jeong Yunho

“Babe, looks like we’re twins!” You messaged him a picture of your new look fresh out of the salon. You wanted to try a new look so what better than having your hair colored like your boyfriend’s. Yunho loves when you two match whether it’s clothing, accessories or miscellaneous items. He’s 100% the type of boyfriend who would buy matching sets of things just to show off. You’re his first love so he wants the whole world to know your love for one another.

Today while you had a free day you wanted to surprise him with this eccentric display of partnership by getting your hair dyed to match his oreo styled white and black hair. You were pretty proud of the results and thought your puppy dog boyfriend would be obsessed but when he finally messaged back you were confused to say the least.

> 🥲🥲🥲🥲

>”what do you not like it??

You were worried if maybe you took the matching too far. I mean matching hoodies and bracelets are one thing but you fully dyed your hair for him. While wondering what his message could have meant you get a face call from him and immediately picked it up. As his image pops up you immediately gasp at the sight of his black hair… not oreo but black. He tries to explain with a straight face that the company had planned to dye his hair black earlier that morning unbeknownst to both of you. As you hear laughter from his bandmates in the background you couldn’t do anything but giggle at the ridiculous situation with them.

“The look suits you better anyways baby.” he finally compliments between chuckles.

Kang Yeosang

Though this isn’t your first acting gig, it is the first where you had to dye your actual hair. You’ve never even gotten highlights before but they want you to dye the whole head. You’re pacing his room thinking out loud as he watches, eating potato chips. Yeosang is more than used to having his hair changed every other comeback or so but he understands how you feel. He gets up to hand you the bag of chips and sits you down on his bed in his place. “So what color do they want for you?” he asked, now standing. You respond, now stuffing your face with chips,” Light brown. Like a milk tea color.” He claps in encouragement, “That’s not that bad Y/N. I’ll probably look really good in it.”

Yeosang tends to be optimistic most of the time but you take his words as honesty. “Really?”, you ask, wiping your mouth. He walks towards you planting a few kisses on your lips, “Of course, nothing can stop your beauty.

Choi San

You’ve always been hesitant to try out new things whether it’s a new restaurant or a new look, to the point that it took you this long to pierce your ears. You are a creature of comfort and disrupting your routine doesn’t sound pleasant to you but deep down you want to branch out even if in a small way. Your bestie San has always been the first person to hold your hand and encourage you so when you told him that you made an appointment with a salon to change your look. You reassured him, or more like yourself, that it’s not going to be a huge change but he’s excited either way that you're ready to get out of your comfort zone.

He drops you off at the salon for a few hours while he runs some errands. When you text him that you're done he gets back to you excitedly. Ready to see your new choice of look.

“San!!”, you waved at him cheerfully, “Do you like it?”. You seem so happy with the outcome that San didn’t want to pop your bubble. Honestly he’s happy youre happy and trying new things.

"... Wow...Y/n it’s great." Practically it’s the same color but you’re so cute when you’re giddy that he’s excited for you.

Song Mingi

Getting tired of the same old same old, you wanted to spice up your look somehow before your boyfriend came back from touring. Mingi would have loved you if you were a worm but you wanted to wow him nonetheless. You messaged him about your thoughts and he suggested you to maybe get your hair trimmed or try lightening the color. He’s so gentle with your feelings, he didn’t want to over suggest and seem like he wanted you to make a big change. He adored you and wanted you to be happy with yourself more than worrying about what he wants. So with those few options you took them and ran. A handful of days later and it was time to meet your boyfriend from his long travels.

He knew that you did something to your hair but not to what extent since you kept it a surprise. You eagerly headed to his dorms, excited to greet him and show him your new look. Once his manager opened the door, he greeted you with a compliment and a welcoming gesture into the house. Luckily the boys weren’t around to see you before he did. Once you called out his name he came jogging down singing yours offkey but the sight of you caught his eye and his heart. “Wow you’re like a new person babe! So beautiful.” He walked up to marvel at your newly colored short shaggy hair. Smiling ear to ear, you're happy with the new look and more than happy that your boyfriend loves it maybe more than you do.

"We should go out today so everyone can see how hot my girlfriend is." He says leaning down for a kiss.

Jung Wooyoung

"Bestie! Open the door bestie! My arms hurt!!" He proceeds to bang on the door impatiently, "Y/N?" he shouts almost completely without energy. You finally open the front door causing him to step back.

"Stop it, youre gonna wake up my neighb-"

"WHEN'D YOU BLEACH YOUR HAIR?!?!?"

You grabbed the food and tried to close him outside for yelling so much but he fought his way in. You both laugh from the bit of rough housing then Wooyoung closes and locks the door behind him, following you to the kitchen to help you set up the breakfast. The way the sunlight from the window shines on your now golden locks distracts him causing him to fumble with the cups.

You catch him staring with his lips parted a bit making you chuckle, "So how do you like it?" It takes him a moment to respond, "you know Y/n I've never really noticed how wavy your hair is. You blonde brings it out nicely."

That comment causes your face to flush suddenly. You hardly ever get complimented on your curl pattern. Honestly you're more used to backhanded compliments. Wooyoung senses your awkwardness and reassures you. "Your hair is really pretty."

Choi Jongho

You like company whenever you have to run errands around town but usually Jongho is busy working so you’d have to either go alone or ask other friends so when he had a day off you took that opportunity to drag him around from place to place. Usually he wouldn’t mind because quality time is his love language but when you told him you needed to get your hair touched up he tried to get out (unsuccessfully). He begged, pleaded, even started pouting since it always works on his hyungs, nothing worked.

Being a seasoned idol, he’s all too familiar with how long and grueling salon trips can be (even though he hardly gets his hair dyed lol). But you told him you need to get your hair done for work and once you gave him your puppy dog eyes he stopped protesting almost instantly.

He sat patiently, making small talk every now and then with the stylist and patrons there during the few hours of wait with his only time of freedom being when he left to get you a snack. To be completely honest, Jongho enjoys any bit of time with you just as much as you with him. He’s enjoyed your time so much that he’s started developing feelings for you, even if he hasn’t realized yet.

Once you’re finally done paying for your hair you walk up to him ushering to leave but the sight of you with lighter hair makes him lose his sense. Already at the door, you look back at him still sitting. “Come on, this is just one place i need to go today”, you say smiling down at him.

He gulps as he regain’s himself to get on his feet. Realizing the budding feelings.

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sinvulkt · 4 months

Text

20 Questions For Writers

Wow, thank you so much for the tag @fanfictasia !! I've wanted to participate in something like this forever!! 🎶✨️✨️

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Right now? 66.

"Yes, as a star wars writer, I am very proud of that. No, I do not intend to change it anytime soon."

I really need to focus on (and finish) some of my WIPs, and that mean trying not to disperse my energy amidst one shots (no matter how much i love monthly challenges and fic exchange events). Also I'm very proud of that 66 count and want to appreciate it xd.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

321k words!!

(More or less 100k / year 🎶 little me would never believe that 0.0

My school exam results sure don't, with how they are dropping 🤣)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Star wars mostly (Vaderkin or my OC Sinvulkt), then Marvel (Dr Strange), Dream SMP (Dream), Le Visiteur du Future (Renard) and more recently Batman (Bruce Wayne) as well as Avatar: the last airbender (Zuko).

Plus the original stories I am supposed to write but almost never end up doing xd (the engagement in fandom compared to original stories make the switch hard xd).

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

1. Dreamt of a Never Ending Sky (Dream SMP)

669 kudos

2. To Fly Free Under The Morning Sun (Star Wars)

480 kudos

3. On the Edge of Twilight (Star Wars)

380 kudos

4. Scales of Embers (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

353 kudos

5. Crash Landing on Space Australia (Star Wars)

319 kudos

I'll never know how my Dream SMP fic got so much engagement. Good timing at a moment the fandom was in effervescence, I guess. Scales of Embers scoring so high is also a surprise 0.0. I discovered it had that many kudos today. It’s a shame the Dr Strange fandom is small because I think my Dr Strange WIP What If Doctor Strange Lost His Humanity ? would have deserved a place here. It definitely does in my heart.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to! As a reader, I always feel super happy when the author shows that they’ve read and appreciated my comments. I know that personality an author who answers make me more likely to want to drop a comment.

As an author, I absolutely want to show how much I love every single comments, so I try to answer them all. But I get a little overwhelmed sometimes, bcs lots of other stuff going on irl or another reason. As such, it can happen that I don't feel the energy to answer a comment on the spot. And if I don't answer it on the spot (using the power of the wiggy dizzy nice happy feeling of getting a comment), I don't necessarily have the energy to answer later on. I currently have something like 60 unanswered comments I think? TT.TT

But rest assured that whether I answered or not, I absolutely adore and cherish every single ones!! Comments are amazing! ✨️.✨️

(This kind of engagement is one of the only reason I managed to settle into such an active rythm of writing after years of trying then dropping the hobby~)

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Glance at my fics.

Uhhh... This is a hard question here... Many of them have angsty endings XD

Mostly the ones at the beginning (the worst written ones xd). I wonder why~

Also a lot of them don' have endings yet XD

I'll say amidst the 'old' fics from 2021, Day 8 - Screaming (Star Wars) would be the angstier one (or most horrible one ig xd).

But as far as recent fic go... While I haven't finished writing it bcs its wordcount exploded in my face, I already plotted / drafted it a few months ago and I know the ending, so I'll choose:

Batman’s Downfall (To Stand Alone) (Batman)

I noticed my kind of angst doesn’t have much success around these parts 🫠🤣. Oh well. I cherish it all the same :3.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Sometimes I think I wrote too many fics. It's hard to select one.

Uhhh... My fluffiest works are one shots in Of Feathers and Freedom serie, but they are part of the series so it’s not really an 'ending'.

...

I'll answer for the crackiest story rather than the happiest ending bcs all my finished fics ending are ominous open ending at best xd.

The Blob Adventures Of Excentrics Jedi (Star Wars)

Because it's cute blob drawings of our crazy team of OC in taaoej, and I love them (although we are all angst lovers in taaoej, so it's more crack-angst, and we don't know the ending bcs there isn't really one. Not yet at least. Hopefully never).

8. Do you get hate on your fic?

Just my own innervoice as far as I'm aware. But then I've always been rather clueless when people tried to 'hate on me'. The message usually just got lost somewhere in dreamspace immensity, never computing.

I've found the fandoms communities really welcoming at the very least!!

9. Do you write smut?

No.

I don't really enjoy reading smut. Nor romance for the matter. I don't think I'd enjoy writing it.

But maybe I'll try one day, for the sake of experimenting all genres.

10. Do you write crossovers?

I never did. I don't know why. Maybe I just never felt the need to mix characters and universes. There are amazing crossovers out there though, so who knows, maybe one day I'll try one.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of. In all honesty, I don't think my works are nearly popular enough to get stolen xd.

My writing style isn’t that good yet, and my dislike of romance when the majority of the fandom community is ship-powered means I end up in a corner quite niche. (A corner I love, that being said. Yay Crack, Angst and Gen~)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but maybe I'll translate some of mine in french someday. Be it only so that I do write fiction in my native language from time to time.

Anyone that wanna translate my fics, feel free to!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Yes, To Fly Free Under The Morning Sun (Star Wars)!!

I’m still waiting for my co-author @purpleopossum to come back to me / get back in star wars mood to continue that one. 🫠

Can’t say my hopes are that high up after all this time, but it’s the redemption | healing part of the serie and I don’t really have fun writing alone redemption | healing part... i prefer doing the whole mayhem that create the injury in the first place. And with how long some of my fics hiatus are (and I got no excuse for those xd), it’s only fair for me to wait. (I did write more other works for the dragon Vader serie in the meantime xd).

I made an oath to myself to never leave a work unfinished though, so we’ll see. If in several years purple still doesn’t wish to continue it, or if she inform me she is dropping the story, I’ll try to make some kind of ending. It’s part of the game i guess.

Alternatively, the The Amazing Adventures Of Excentrics Jedi universe is a group of star wars OCs that we made together with @pat-the-togorian , @asteral-feileacan , @ct2002-rema and Xylian. I don’t know if that count as co-writing? We usually write our OCs pov.

But in all cases, co-writting is very fun and I’d definitely do it again if other opportunities arise in the future.

14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?

The absence of ship is my all-time favorite ship. Otherwise, "main character / digging their own grave" would be my 'favorite ship' since I tend to synch with idiots snarky jerks disasters.

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

To Fly Free Under The Morning Sun (Star Wars) that I mentioned for question 13? 🤣

More seriously, I'll answer On the Edge of Twilight (Star Wars)

Because it's my vent fic. I know the main plot line, I vaguely know the current arc, but no one can predict where the next arc will go. It's all pure impulse and while I have a vague idea of 'ending', I refuse to plan a path towards it. This fic specifically, I want to keep pure impulse. So I'd love for it to become some kind of "The NeverEnding Story". :3

16. What’s your writing strengths?

I write.

No seriously, it's not something I did four years ago appart from vent poems here and there. Writing is in itself a huge writing strenght!

Otherwise I'm also a bottomless well of idea. It's pretty neat.

17. What’s your writing weaknesses?

... romance?

Or dialogues. Lastly I have a lot of frustration around the transition from dialogue / transition / dialogue. I feel like I'm crap at properly timing that.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

It's fun. I do it for games sometimes. Since apparently writing normally is not chllenging enough for my brain sometimes. It did teach me bits of mando'a.

Recently for Sēċan (Star Wars) I decided last minute to put the whole droid dialogue in morse, and I regret none of it.

I'm usually only doing it for one shots though, and never 'official existing' languages until now.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Star wars :p

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Now that's another hard question, how am I supposed to select one.

I'm gonna answer the whole Of Feathers And Freedom (Star Wars) serie. Bcs wings. :3

Tag time~ (if you wish to)

@purpleopossum @pat-the-togorian @cinderfeather @beguilewritesstuff @purple-iris @dreaminghour @ravenite-void @trickstress333 @bluntblade @doctorgeekery @stewardofningishzida @jenae-0 @trickstress333 @kittonafoxgirl @pastelcourage @salparadiselost @kefalion @charlottevader @ravenstakeflight @starr234 @aelaer @sarcasticfirefighter @mckiwi @linzerj @sonderwalker @exomal @tonhalszendvics @nephilimswitchlight @firejay112 @only-here-for-the-star-wars @ajedilikehisfather @makaronik @chickadeechickadoo @dirtkid123 @numerousbees1106 @akizumy @25centsoda @udekai @wendingways @silvereddaye @in-company-of-misery @wisechaosglitter @kuraiarcoiris @alright-anakin @wyvunn you're more than welcome to join on the interview fun!! (Or to ignore the tagging if not interested xd).

I know I tagged. I lot of people. Some of you may recognise my pseud, some may not. But I thought it would be interesting to hear the answer of the various authors with whom I interacted on ao3 over the years, so I went and digged up those with tumblr I could find from my inbox 🤣

(Hopefully I didn’t bother any of you >.< - otherwise I apologize. Same for if I accidentally tagged a non-writer.)

I'd love to hear your answers! 🎶

#ask game #tag game #tagging game #20 questions #20 Questions For Writers #i got far too good at tracking down ao3 people's tumblr xd #it's the fault of the quotes under my tag fragments of imagination #since i try to always check if the author is on tumblr to tag them when i post one of those quotes #well i had a lot of fun #i love interactions XD #so that kind of ask game makes me happy #with it i can feel as a proud writer yay~#tumblr game #writing #writer on tumblr #fanfiction writer #yes this took me hours #wrll mostly the tracking and tagging xd #answering was worth it

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recurring-polynya · 3 months

Text

Writing/Art Update 2.27.2024

I met all three of my goals for last week, which is good, I guess. Number one was to stop being manic about my stupid fanfic, which I did, but I half-regret, because maybe I would be done by now, if I had just shot the anxiety curl, but that's neither here nor there, I suppose. I did finish Chapter 9a, and sent Chapters 7 and 8 to the beta, which were the other things I said I wanted to do. I, in fact, managed to make a dent in Chapter 9c, as well (Chapter 9b is like a little interlude thing, which may or may not get subsumed into Chapter 9c, depending on how long it comes out)

I am so close to being done, and I feel like it ought to be easy to push it over the finish line, but it hasn't. I've been feeling pretty down on it for the last few days. I'm not super-happy with the way the last few chapters have been turning out, but on the other hand, I'm not sure I have any way to make them better. I think a lot of it may just be that I have been working on this fanfic for so long that I'm kinda sick of it. :\

I took a little bit of a break today--I finished a book I was reading, and I made sort of a rough draft version of a banner, mostly because I'm still trying to nail down the title from a couple of different variations, and I was hoping that seeing it visually would be helpful. Based on that, the current frontrunner is Damage History (the other two options are Past Damage and Prior Damage, please feel free to tell me if you have any opinions).

I just did the math and apparently I crossed the six figure mark this week: the thing currently stands at 100,731 words (+7,004 for last week...really? How did I manage that???) I have two and a half scenes left to go, one of which is supposed to be short and one of which is the epilogue. There's also at least one scene that I'll probably try to rewrite a bit, I dunno. I guess the goal for next week is to finish the thing??? All of this feels extremely unreal.

Anyway, you've all been incredibly patient with me, so here's another preview. This is from one of the flashbacks in Chapter 2, and if it seems vaguely familiar, it's because it's one of the parts that got spun out of the old Renji-breaks-an-arm story.

---

Much like Kitajima himself, the shop had looked a lot better the last time Renji had seen it. There was dust and cobwebs everywhere. Most of the shelves were half-empty.

"Take off your shirt," Kitajima instructed, dragging out a stool for Renji to sit on.

"All the damage is below the elbow," Renji said quietly.

"Oh, look who's a medic now," the old man burbled.

Renji took off his shirt.

Kitajima pressed one of his clammy hands in the space between Renji's shoulder blades. A cold, nasty feeling bled down Renji's arm. He wanted to vomit. After a few moments, Kitajima felt his way down Renji's arm, squeezing at his flesh and shooting painful little sparks into his nerves. When the old rat snake got past the elbow, his fingers pressed against the end of the broken bone and Renji nearly passed out.

"Hey! You're hurting him!" Rukia barked, bracing her entire weight against Renji's shoulder in an attempt to keep him upright.

Kitajima ignored her.

It wasn't pain, not exactly. Well. It was painful, but it was more like Renji's body was burning through all of his energy as quickly as possible. It felt like dying.

Kitajima finished his palpitations, then fetched something from one of his dusty jars. "Eat this," he said, pressing it into Renji's hand.

Renji remembered these things all too well. He'd eaten a lot of them during the period when he was working for Kitajima. It was a pill made up of mashed rice and various dried roots and seeds. They weren't the tastiest thing in the world, but they packed a lot of energy and they lasted forever. He bit into it gingerly.

“As I told you the last time you were here,” the old man growled, “you have the demon magic in you. The shinigami use it to cast spells, but also to push their bodies past what is normally possible. Like a fool, you have done this without proper training. You have broken and healed yourself simultaneously, but with no skill, and you have made a hash of it.”

“I wasn’t trying,” Renji excused.

“Can you repair it?” Rukia pressed.

“I can rebreak it,” Kitajima replied.

#writing update #art update

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writercole · 1 year

Text

Mid-May update

After several days of thinking and one very good session with my journal husband counselor, I won't be leaving tumblr after all.

I'm still incredibly frustrated with the way creators are being treated, with the audacity of some of these bitches, the lack of interaction. But all that aside, I do like the fandom aspect of it.

I've culled several of my followed blogs, dropping over 300 people in the last several weeks. And I've been very liberal with that block button. I will be doing what I need to do to protect the little piece of peace that I have here.

A large part of my decision to stay has been mutuals. You guys have been incredibly supportive in so many ways over the years. The amount of you that have reached out and checked on me, that continuously poke my inbox with sweet messages, that flatter me every day is wonderful. To think that if we didn't have the internet, we wouldn't have our found family tribes, our Team Free Wills, our Avengers, our Daggers. Our covens. My life would be incredibly dull without you all.

My first week of work was tedious and slightly boring as it's all training but it's incredibly calming to have something to do during the day without relying on others to entertain me.

My gratitude for everyone through this month is indescribable. I wouldn't have made it, we wouldn't have made it without you and I will forever be grateful. You all have my love and admiration and my sword.

Now that I'm done with the blahdi blah, I'm sure you all want to know the updates on my wips, huh? Fine 😂

But one more thing first - happy birthday to my sibling, my friend, a bright spot in every day - @never--doubt. Kay, babe, I love you. I'm proud of you. And I am sending every ounce of positive energy that today goes your way. 💞💞

Five Minutes More is drafted for posting. We'll see Dean Winchester as a gamer and mechanic figuring out this little thing called love. One part currently, possibly more.

You, Me, and the Noises You Make is a honeymoon with Beau Simpson short story, under 500 words but ready to post soon.

The Replacement Bride is a new story for a new world featuring a group of mafia families spread across the country. There will be interconnected stories - already at chapter 6 and I've worked four of the six families together with a possibility of more as the story continues. I am considering the option of going straight to published with this universe, depending on how it fleshes itself out.

You'll Be In My Heart will be posting beginning in July, unless i finish a few other things first. We last left Jake standing in the bookstore staring after his ex-girlfriend (now named Allie) and his daughter, the one he never knew he had. Depending on the interaction and feedback I get, this may be the last series for tumblr.

Sounds of Someday: The Rewrite is trudging along slowly. My brain keeps telling me that I've already written this and that I shouldn't be doing it again but also that it's nowhere near good enough for publishing. My friend who has a masters degree in social work with a concentration in grief and trauma counseling will be looking over it when it's finished, hopefully between semesters for her!

I have several new pieces with original characters in progress, including a fantasy trilogy based on the song 'Labour' by Paris Paloma.

Also drafted are several moodboards for several different AUs. Due to the way moodboards are being received by the general pubic, they will stay in drafts until I decide what to do with them further.

There are more pieces of the Country Club AU in progress, including our first Boatman Bob story. I also have a collection called "A Thin Line" that I'm working on the second and third stories simultaneously for. One of those includes Fritz smut and I'm having trouble with it because he keeps short circuiting my brain.

There are two Ryan Spencer (Yellowstone) stories in progress as well as one Rip and a couple Rhett.

Sons of Anarchy is making a resurgence with a grand total of four wips.

Jason Todd has a couple of stories floating around in there.

I've got a few more Pedro, Sebastian, and C. Evans stories coming as well as stories for four different Toms, two other Chrises, a few more Jensen characters, and some new Glen, Lewis, and Danny characters.

The DC and Star Trek master lists will be expanding.

Posting of full fics will resume in June. I have one drabble that will be posted Friday and then new master lists will post twice a week until June 6. If there are still some to post, then they will posts on Tuesdays with fics on Fridays.

Fridays will be one-shots with Tuesdays being series.

What I'm also considering is restarting Patreon and including original works in there as well, and expanding it to an audience that includes my other readers. The other option is using tumblr tipping (which is powered by stripe and therefore more trustworthy than the hellsite itself) and locking posts. But that's definitely not the best case scenario.

Also in progress, while we're talking about other readers, is an actual website for my published works. Yes, I know the three I have out now are mediocre by many standards. They were really just to prove a point to myself. These next ones...not so mediocre.

My new job may take 40 hours of writing away from my schedule but let's be honest here...I wasn't spending 40 hours writing a week anyway.

#cole speaks #updates #about cole #coming soon #ocs #original content #sounds of someday rewrite #you'll be in my heart #the replacement bride #five minutes more #you me and the sounds you make #jake seresin #beau simpson #dean winchester #i'm not leaving #you're stuck with me

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fountainpenguin · 9 months

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Hey! Idk if ur still into TD, but me and my friends absolutely adore ur fics for it! It’s so awesome to see you still writing and on tumblr, i hope ur doing well!!!

Thank you! I'm so glad you've enjoyed those 'fics <3 I'm not currently reblogging TD stuff here or working on TD stories, but there's a special place in my heart for all of it (Life of a Loser turned 10 years old in June, sob... My baby's all grown up...)

My TD stuff definitely walked so the 'fics I write now could run, and TD kicked off a love of "huge cast of wildly different characters" & "the status quo isn't sacred" storytelling that still influences my writing and favorite media today. I never stopped loving that type of "Every character is the main character of their own story and they're all looking out for themselves first" style, ha ha.

I'm glad my TD stuff is still making people smile. There are some goodies in there and I have a lot of feelings about the worldbuilding and character portrayals I went with. And if you / your friends / anyone else reading this ever wants to send Asks, I'd be happy to talk about TD even though I'm not posting new content right now; it holds a special but firm place in my heart :)

I did think my TD stuff had run its course since I haven't heard a peep from the fandom in years, but ever since I uploaded "Sunk Too Deep" to AO3, I've gotten a flood of adoration on my TD stuff, so I might have to start posting some of it over there and maybe I'll dig up some old drafts I never finished; we'll see. It means a lot to hear people are finding my stuff for the first time and falling in love with it. I'm glad it's held up.

Thanks for the comment! Forever kicking, forever writing <3

#I miss the cartoon physics worldbuilding so much... I got a taste of it again in Come What May chap 4 but I miss it...#My Noah portrayal will forever be special to me. Love him #Total Drama #Total Drama fanfic #asks #punkrockperry #ridwriting #99% true as far as we remember #Oh I'm so thrilled Tumblr not only shatters Read Mores but is now breaking italics this is the best possible news #Nice words

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viridescent-lance · 9 months

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TOA Anniversary Munday!

Celebrating TOA and the people who contribute to make our group what it is.

Repost, don't reblog. Only fill in what you feel comfortable sharing!

Happy anniversary, TOA! Here's to many more years spent together.

tagging whoever wants to do this!

Name: Pat Gem! Patrick is the full name but Pat is what I go by most often in this group.

Pronouns: he/they

Birthday (no year): September 15! Same as my beloved kitty Cassie.

Where are you from? What is your time zone?: I'm from California, PST! I was born in the Bay Area, moved to Alabama where I spent ten years as a kid, and moved back to California. That's the truncated version.

Roleplay experience: I started roleplaying on the Warrior Cats Forums in like...2010, I think? I also did private Skype rps with my best friend at the time. This lasted for 3-4 years until both fizzled out around the same time. I have some experience doing group nuzlocke rp on the nuzforums, but that also didn't last as long as I'd like. Other than some ttrpgs, I had a dry spell, and in 2019 I joined a Friends at the Table tumblr RP that would change my life. There I met Maddie and some other friends, and while the rp wasn't super active after I joined it, Maddie and I started doing rp ourselves! Finally, in late 2021, Lucius invited Maddie to TOA and I also got the invite and tagged along.

Got any pets?: Yep! Cassie and Oreo, my beloveds! Both cats, Cassie is the one with a hairdo and she's almost 4, Oreo's a year and a half and a tuxy baby.

Favorite time of year: I love when it is nice and cool but not too cold. Fall is my favorite season, personally, but really I especially enjoy not sweating to death.

Some interests and things you like: I'm a huge Pokemon fan, which I'll elaborate on later. Here though I'll say that I have a huge interest in competitive Pokemon, both singles and the official VGC circuit. I'm a big TTRPG guy! I have a lot of systems and games I like but I'll single out Fall of Magic, Jenna Moran games, the Forged in the Dark system, the Belonging Outside Belonging system, and It's Been A Long Long Time! I have an interest in speedrunning, I watch a lot of videos about it and it's fun. I love Discworld, the Terry Pratchett series. Tales of Vesperia is a game of all time. Yuri Lowell your problems disorders. Ace Attorney helped mold me as a person. Warrior cats will forever live in my heart. Bionicle also helped make me the guy I am today. 999 is a visual novel of all time. Play it and do not look it up. I actually have a huge interest in media analysis, it's something I really really enjoy talking about and researching. Splatoon my beloved. Octopath Traveler 1 and 2! I love birds and bats and lots of animals! Okay I'm running out of steam and also this is very long so I'll just stop here but there's definitely things I am forgetting.

Some funfacts & trivia about you: - I'm a library and women's and gender studies student, and hope to some day work as a librarian! For now, I'm an afterschool program associate, and I love working with the kids. - I have met Nancy Pelosi while wearing a Pokemon button up. - I've survived a tornado that started above my house. - I have finished 34 nuzlockes. - Marth was one of my first smash mains but I didn't get into Fire Emblem for years. - I have the cilantro soap gene but I like the taste of soap. - I'm physically disabled and use a cane irl! - My girlfriend used to have me blocked on Twitter. - I've made it to playoffs every single Pokemon draft league I've been in but never made it past semifinals - I was very isolated as a kid and rarely left the house. As a result, I learned my vocabulary mostly from books, as well as how I talk and emote from books and shows. I've been told I talk and act like a cartoon character, which I suppose is fair!

What non-Fire Emblem games do you play?: I play a bunch of Splatoon, probably one of the main games I play! It's very fun, and I'm a Sploosh/Custom Jr/Tentatek triple threat main who constantly hovers around S. Octopath Traveler 1 and 2 have me grabbed so hard. I am hopelessly a Pokemon guy. I play nuzlockes, casually, and competitively, and I have almost every single Pokemon and its learnset and viable competitive learnsets memorized. I am very normal about it. I also really love the Zero Escape series. I've been playing the warrior cats procgen sim ClanGen recently. I used to play a bunch of No Man's Sky, want to get back into that soon. Honestly I struggle to consistently play and finish games, and I've been trying to work on that.

Favorite Pokemon type & Pokemon: Bug; Flygon. Yes, you can combine these two to get the logical conclusion: Flygon should have been a Bug/Dragon type! It's based off the life cycle of a lacewing!!

How did you get into Fire Emblem?: I've got two stories here, one of how I almost got into Fire Emblem and how it got on my radar, and the other being how I finally got into it for real. So, in 9th grade, I had a crush on a boy who played Awakening at lunch every day. I'd talk with him and he actually offered to buy me Awakening, but I, one of the only poor kids in a rich school, was flabbergasted he would spent 40 dollars on me and felt guilty and was like are you sure? And he was like well okay if you don't want me to. I kind of wish I'd taken him up on the offer because he sucked as a person and his family was super rich but oh well. I then played the hell out of the demo. Flash forward to 2019. I'm scrolling twitter and see a friend of mine is streaming Fire Emblem Three Houses. I've seen it before, and it seems pretty fun. A lot of my friends like Fire Emblem. I watch the stream and fall in love with the characters and style of the game, and I impulse buy Three Houses. I then tell Maddie and sell them on Three Houses. Thus, it begun...

What Fire Emblem games have you played?: This is a fun and complicated question for me to answer because if you count me backseating Maddie, it's some of fe4, most of fe7, fe8, fe9, fe10, over half of fe13, some fe14, fe15, and fe16. If it's just me, that shrinks down to some fe7 and fe8, some fe9, over half of fe13, some fe15, and some fe16. I was an active participant in watching the games so it feels like a smidgen of playing them but not quite?

First Fire Emblem game: Either the Awakening demo or Three Houses.

Favorite Fire Emblem game: Shadows of Valentia, Sacred Stones, and the Tellius duology. Hard to specify a single favorite, especially depending on what we are defining favorite as.

Any Fire Emblem crushes? 😳 : Where do I begin. I mean Lukas is like, perhaps one of my strongest ones. Though I'm also smitten with Forsyth and attracted to Python despite him being terrible boyfriend material. Recently I have been making eyes at Legault in Blazing Blade, and also playing Fates for the first time had me really surprised at how much Setsuna charmed me. Uhhh lemme think also. Christ Kent your problems disorders bewitch me. Claude you are my everything I will do anything for you. Shamir also if we are talking 3h, what a gal. Ranulf my beloved, he's got things together and he's playful and teasing and just has a great personality. Also Titania...pretty and strong and cool and just a fantastic character who I would not object to kissing on the mouth. I think i might stop here because if I keep going I am going to just take you on a tour of my numerous Fire Emblem crush tastes.

If you’ve played the following games, who was your first S support? Who would you S support nowadays? - Awakening: Panne; I'd also S support Libra or Say'ri. I need to mention that my first awakening playthrough was in 2020 though so if I'd gotten it in 2013 like I almost did I'd probably have gotten married to like...Libra if I waited that long, Chrom if I messed up and got automarried, or like. Stahl or something bc he's really nice and a knight. - Fates: I have not S supported anyone in Fates yet but Setsuna and Silas I am Looking. - Three Houses: I actually never have S supported anyone in Three Houses, as I never actually finished my personal playthrough! However, my big choices are Shamir and Claude, though w the latter I just pretend that's me bc I don't do teacher/student. - Engage: Not enough experience to say who I might S support. Will get back to you.

Favorite Fire Emblem class: Do laguz/taguel/manakete count. I'm also weak for archers I shan't lie.

If you were a Fire Emblem character, what would be your class?: Oh I know I'd be one of those frail little mages who has explosive firepower and waning physical ability. Honestly being that but on a wyvern would be fun. My good friend my mobility wyvern.

If you were a Three Houses character, what would be your affiliation?: Golden Deer 4ever baybee not even close.

If you were an Engage character, which Emblem would you Engage with?: I'll get back to this, I'm not sure if I have the info I need to make an informed choice. My first thought is that I would love to have Ike chilling with me though, Ike my good friend Ike.

How did you find TOA?: Lucius invited Maddie, and Maddie invited me! I was roleplaying Forsyth with Maddie's Python 1on1 at the time and the idea of a group RP was very appealing to me, despite me being swamped with work and school and health issues at the time. I'm so glad I made the leap!

Current TOA muses: Forsyth and Leanne!

Who was your first TOA muse? If you don’t have them anymore, could you see yourself picking them up again?: Forsyth! I don't see myself dropping him unless his narrative here is done, really.

Have you had any other TOA muses?: Oh Ranulf...I had a very fun time with him, but I just was not in the state to handle three muses and having two muses has been much more manageable, so he's probably not coming back for a while.

Do you think you have a type of character you gravitate towards?: I tend to write very earnest characters, especially in a group RP setting. I've pushed my comfort zone before, but characters who express themselves very openly and intensely are my bread and butter. Characters who wear their hearts on their sleeves, for better or worse.

What do you believe you enjoy writing the most?: Hard to say, but honestly I really enjoy writing relationships, and the ways in which they shift and change over time. I really like character-focused writing the most, emotions and thoughts and such, and exploring the connections between characters! This feels like a silly answer, but it's what I'm feeling!

Favorite TOA-related memory: Oh man this is a hard one. Hard to choose so I'll just pick one that came to mind which is Leanne and Vaida's bizarre adventure in Queen's Compass. What a good event that was, blows a kiss to the sky for Zyra. I'm also a huge fan of everything involving Forsyth's Jugdral meddling and the narrative impact of his deaths in KKE. There are so many funny little experiences and memories that stick with me forever, really.

How do you pronounce TOA? 🤔: Tee-oh-ay! Pronouncing it as a word is the same as Toa from Bionicle and to keep them distinct in my mind I sound it out.

Got any delusions that didn’t see the light of day that you’d like to share? 😉: The world if I could handle three muses...Legault scratching at my door. Ranulf also scratching at my door. Blows a kiss to the guys I would enjoy playing but don't have the time and energy for.

#[ ooc ]#[ dash meme ]#//ty for making this neffi!!

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