#i wanted to write smth for today but couldnt get around to it so this is all i have | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

harry1simp · 10 months

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So I ve been obssesed over Harry june from dkb recently so lets write smth lol.

lot of teasing from the other members lol.

Pairing : harry june x f barist.reader.

So a group of boys went to my bar 1 week ago and since then they dont stop coming over. When I greet them to take their order they always seem to hide something like they look so nasty lol.

So today as any other day, I put myself in my uniform which is pink AND really tight so people better know me when they start getting annoying Im starting too since IM uncomfortable.

It was the morning and actually just a few people came to drink a juice or smth. So I ate my lunch with my boss and some colleagues and we talked about nothing and everything.

- So whats up with that group of grown up men? Taylor asked, one of my colleague.

- What do you mean " THAT group of grown up men"?- I replied in a mocking tone.

- Co mon you know who I am talking about. Especially this boy who looks a bit younger than the others. He seems so shy when youre around thats so cute !

I choked with my noodles.what the fuck ?

- Are you talking about THEM ? - I asked shocked.

- Of course them. Dont you find them hot ? - my other friend Ben started

- They're litteraly 9 wth ?!

- Lmfao y/n I know you do not have 9 holes im just saying you prob find ONE of them hot or idk.. - Ben said while laughing like he was dying.

- You scared me I swear. Hm well.. yeah that young boy is cute not gonna lie but im not gonna try anything.

Taylor scoffed and whispered a " whatever" followed by Ben saying " you better get at least one of them" before returning back to work leaving me alone.

It was 4:00 pm and thats the moment people finish work so we all know we gonna be really busy. When i say "people " I also include them. Sometimes theyre all together sometimes theyre not.

- Look who came y/n. - Ben said teasingly.

I looked to the main entrance and saw them. They were 5. The cute boy, another one who was doing some body rolls while walking, a tall boy with yellow hair, one with a cap on his head and the last one all in black looking like he wanted to kill someone. I gave my attention back to work since I started to stare a lil too much.

- Dont try to run away y/n . - Ben said.

- Yeah go take their order btw. - taylor ordered

- What n- I didnt finish my sentence they both pushed me to the hall where people were sat.

I took a deep breath and took a piece of paper with a pen while making my way to them.

- Hi guys ! - I said naturally like I didnt know my friends were watching me in the kitchen smiling like psychopaths.

- Hey y/n. How are you doing ? - The guy with the cap asked happily.

- Im good ahah thanks what about you ? - I asked trying not to seem awkward af.

- We're good. Happy to see you again. I would like a milkshake please !

- Okay noted - I informed taking notes.

- For me it will be a wisky please. - The serial killer said without even looking at me.

- What about you guys ? - I asked mentioning the others.

- Can I have an iced tea ? - The yellow haired guy demanded nicely.

- Sure !

- By the way y/n my son here has something to ask you. - The first guy spoke pointing the cute boy with his finger.

- Oh.. - I said suprised .

The guy smiled placing his head in his hands feeling shy and aparently not aware about the guy opening for him.

- Could I have your number or your instagram ? - he asked looking so adorable I could only accept.

- Yeah sure ! - I took my phone out of my pocket and handed it to him showing my number.

- What is your name ? - I couldnt hide my happiness I was smiling like an idiot.

- Harry June - He replied with a big smile on his face.

- Nice harry june, what would you like ?

- A lemonade please.

- and for me it will be a coca. - the guy who was hip trusting the air earlier said.

- Okay guys thanks.

And I walked away like I hadn't a bunch of others clients waiting behind me.

I went back to the kitchen with my notes plus my heart beating like I just talked to a celebrity.

- Tell us. - Ben said his arms crossed against the wall.

- Tell you what ?

- You litteraly handed him your phone I dont think he asked for Ben's feet pictures ! - Taylor said dead serious.

- Hows that you have my feet in photos ? - Ben asked concerned.

- Calm down I didnt show him your fucking feet but my number !!

They both went silent for a second.

- He asked for your number ?? - They said in synch.

- Yes he did can you guys stop screaming for christ's sake ??

- Which one ? The cutie boy ???

- Yes Harry June.

- His name is Harry June ? - Ben said while gasping in a gay way.

- I swear to god shut it down or I punch you.

- No way youre on your period-

- Ben !!! - Taylor and I shouted to him.

- Poor boy he must have been so scared asking you your number Im dying.

I stared at Ben feeling annoyed and just gave them the orders making my way to the others clients.

When I was taking some orders I could sense his stare on me, Im not complaining tho but I just couldnt focus.

/ H-J 's pov /

- Im so proud of you my baby ! - Dongil said while hugging me like I was a child.

- Urgh dont do that in public please ! - I said feeling embarrassed.

- My dear you better get into pda when she will be yours or she wont do anything with you. - Heechan affirmed with no guidance.

- Are you being serious right now ? Stop talking about this its weird. - I begged fearing that she could hear us.

- Lets leave him alone poor boy. - Changmin suggested.

I sighed and looked away to meet y/n in front of me with our drinks.

- Heres yours Harry June - She said nicely while giving me my lemonade.

- thank you - I replied with a small smile in the corner of my lips.

- Your coca.

She gave us our drinks and was about to leave but of course my stupid friend had to open his fucking mouth to speak.

- Y/n are you free after work ? Harry would love to get to know you.

I want to slap him.

- Oh Im done in 2 hours wont it be long for you to wait ? - she asked looking at me concerned.

- I- No no problem i will wait for you outside - I offered her my smile.

- So kind from you Harry, enjoy your drinks guys. - She said before leaving.

- Youre dea-

- Youre welcome - Heechan cut me off.

- Im not a kid I could have asked her out and not have you doing it for me. - I said angrily.

- you have a date so stop being a dick and give me a hug.

- Never. - I replied crossing my arms feeling betrayed.

/ Your pov /

I was so excited to see the cutie boy that I litteraly mistaken some orders which made my boss furious but its okay my friends protected me. Thats when I realize they can actually be usefull lol.

So when all the clients were gone I put myself into more comfortable clothes.

- Enjoy pretty. - Taylor said winking at me before grabbing her bag ready to leave too.

- I.. I will taylor go home safe. - I said in a sigh not really knowing what to say.

Ben was allready gone for a moment. Well lets go I told myself.

I took my bag and closed the bar behind me.

- Oh you're here. - A male voice said coming from my back.

I turned around facing Harry June.

- Yeah ahah, Im here. - I put the bar's keys in my pocket and returned my attention to him - You know you didnt have to wait for me I know your friend said that but really we can do that another day if y-

- No no dont say thay its completly fine ! - He cut me out while using his hands. - My friend can be a little invasive but he was right and I dont have anything to do so..

I nodded feeling relieved that the boy didnt feel obliged to wait for a girl he didnt even know.

- Thank you very much. My clients actually left sooner than usual so Im all yours ahah. - I said with a laugh.

He laughed too and not gonna lie he has the prettiest smile and laugh ever. He was wearing a large tee shirt with some grey jogging. He seemed to be comfortable in it, that made me want to snuggle myself into it.

- So.. what do you wanna talk about ?

I stopped to space out for a second and looked at him like a normal girl.

- Tell me more about you. I actually see you coming to my bar with your friends every week but I just got your name today ahah.

- Yeah we really enjoy coming to your bar. Its cozy and we have a good time when were there.

- Ooh I'm glad to know this ! You know when me and my friends see you laughing out loud with your group we actually wanna know what you are talking about.

He laughed. I.MADE.HIM.LAUGH

- Oh my god I hope we dont do that much noise.

We walked side by side without really knowing where we were going but I felt actually good. For a guy that seemed shy at first sight hes actualy really easy going with me.

- So where are you from Harry ?

- Im Korean. Both my parents are korean too. Youre a foreigner right ?

- Yes I am. Korean is such a struggle for me urgh. Your english is amazing harry by the way !

- Oh thanks Im studying this really hard since a lot of foreign people come in Korea.

I nodded actually amazed by his talent.

- Youre not that bad either ya'know your Korean is actually pretty good.

I smiled hapily like a little girl but mostly cauz I actually received a compliment from him.

- Oh thanks Youre the first one saying me this ahah.

- Dont underestimate yourself like that. And maybe I could help you out with your Korean I mean if youre okay with it.

- Yes sure that will be so nice !

A few hours went like that and when I noticed the time on my phone I actually gasped.

- Oh my its 8: pm I need to go harry Im so sorry to leave you like that I didnt expect us to talk that long !

- yeah youre right I actually have to go too its okay.

- I really had a good time knowing you Harry

- Me too y/n come home safely

- You too harry bye.

He waved at me and thats how we left each other.

That night I couldnt sleep. I told Taylor and Ben everything about harry june, about how he was so sweet and kind with me, how interesting he seemed to be and they look to like him back.

I was dreaming eyes open when I received a text from Harry.

00:25 am : Youre sleeping ?

I laughed feeling amused by his question.

00:27 am : No I can't :(( Seems like you either ?

00:28 am : Yea :// A friend of mine is sleeping next to me and hes growling like a pig help *_* And what about you ?

00:29 am : Lmaooo Can't really help you sorry 😭 Same for me.. Well Im alone tho but cant close an eye.

00:30 am : Is it cauz you cant wait to meet me again ? 🤭

I actually didn't know what to answer and I didn't plan to give him a reply maybe tomorow.. but his answer interested me even more I just couldnt sleep without making a move from my side.

00:33 am : Mhhh.. Maybe ? 🤷‍♀️

00:36 am : XD anyways now Im not in front of you plus not my friends being dicks I have to admit youre really pretty :)) idk if I seemed shy lol but its just Im not used to y'know approach girls like that so..

I wanted to scream. He said Im pretty. The cutie boy harry june said I was pretty. I was jumping in my bed like a groopie but he texted a few seconds after again.

00:38 am : Ive never been into a relationship, so before running lets walk first y'know 👉

00:39 am : YES YES 50TH SHADE DEGRES REFERENCE 🙌 WAIT how old are you harry ? Arent you too young for this ?

00:40 am : Im 21 yo. C mon I just got lost on netflix.. 🤫

00:41 am : Yeah yeah.. 🤨 anyways thanks youre very cute too and handsome lol.

I embarrassed myself for saying this and actually have no shame so I put my phone on my nightstand and tried to sleep but with no results.

I had my day off today and man Im gonna enjoy it. Thats when I took my phone that realisation hit me. I got 2 messages from him.. Men Im scared. I opened them with shaking hands.

00:42 am : Oh thank you thats the 1st time a girl finds me cute and handsome 😊

00:45 am : I really appreciated this evening with you y/n. I hope we could meet again real soon ?

1:00 am : Good night I guess 🌃🌙

My heart was melting inside my breast. Hes so sweet. Hes like a teddy bear you wanna hug when youre not feeling safe. I didnt waste one second and answered him immediatly.

10:00 am : Oh my ! Sorry June I felt asleep so abruptly ! I really did too and I would looovveee to see you again as well ;))

I felt so stupid leaving him with no response til 1 am. But I couldnt hide the smile appearing on my face.

I took my breakfast in front of a serie I loved and was just chilling in my sofa and then i received a notification.

10:13 am : Its okay y/n ! At least you fell asleep ahah. I look like a zombie 😫 What about tonight ? I would like to show you a place I love.

Tonight ? Well I have nothing to do but idk it seems off..

10:15 am : Why not :)) What time ?

10:16 am : Hm lets say 9 pm ? We could grab an ice cream just next to it !

Ice cream okay im coming.

10:17 am : Okay perfect !

He gave me a place to find him and then I did the dishes.

The moment arrived I put myself in a floral dress I bought a while ago and finally found the occasion to wear it. I came to the previous place and foud him sat on a bench looking hella good.

- Hi ! - I greeted him.

- Oh y/n h- he paused for a moment looking at me. - Wow youre beautiful. - He said touching his neck.

- Oh thank you Harry youre amazing too !

We didnt know how to greet ourselves at first it was awkward lol. But he took a step forward me and opened his arms. I did the same and we ended up in each other's arms. I wanted to cry. It was just like him ; sweet and warm.

- I missed you. - He whispered next to my ear. We separated from each other and it felt empty.

- I missed you too harry. So.. show me that famous place you wanna take me to !

- Ah yes let's go ! - He said in a cute way I wanted to eat him.

We walked for around 20 hours while talking and I could feel his hand touching mine's at some moments.

Then we arrived at a quiet and peacefull place .

- Here we are.

- Wow it looks great I've never been here before !

The landscape was just magic. There was a small lake in front of us and some benches to admire it.

- Let's have a seat.

- Sure. - I continued.

We sat next to each other and just like that we stared at the lake without a sound.

- Can I ask you a question ? - Harry broke the silence turning his head facing me.

- Of course Harry.

- Are you single ? - It was so out of nowhere.

- A-Yes I am. What about you ?

- I am too.

- Well.. great I mean-

- I like you Y/N - He said in one breath.

- I- I like you too Harry

- I mean no.. I love you. I know we don't know each other that much but I don't know I.. didnt stop thinking about since we spoke to each other and.. every time I come to your bar my eyes are always on you..

- Woah harry I.. I lost my words.. I honestly feel the same way..

- Really ?

- Yeah.. You know.. let's give each other times to you know.. be sure about our feelings and.. then we could enjoy it completly ?

Harry nodded.

- Yeah let's do that.

We both smiled feeling relieved like we couldn't hold those secrets in anymore.

- Can I.. kiss you ?

I looked at him smiling. Yes ofc I wanted. HARRY FUCK KISS ME

- Yes please.

He laughed and didn't waste a second to catch my lips in a short and sweet kiss. We pulled from each other.

- Thanks. - He said like I gave him a gift.

- What are you thankful for ? - I asked feeling so soft for him.

- I just kissed a pretty girl and she loves me too.

- Harry youre so cute I swear come here .

I hugged him tightly and he did the same.

Some weeks passed and Harry and I hung out a lot. We went to different dates. He took me to the pool with some of his friends. I met Teo who's such a sweetheart, Yuku a Sunshine he's ma fav, Junseo who first gave me killer vibes ended up being the complete opposite, he's a big teddy bear but he still scares me since he's like 500 times bigger than me. Then there's Heechan who is really funny but Jesus's christ he's so perverted. Like we can talk about food and heechan is in the back talking about pussy.

Anyways theyre all very kind with me. They keep reminding harry that he's lucky to have me lol. When we're all together, Dongil, aka Harry June's father, says " Protect yourself my son I dont wanna take care of another child " so we both end up cringing from embarrassment.

We're currently at Harry's place with some of his friends ; Seongmin, Dongil and Changmin. I was on Harry's laps, his hands around my waist and we were just chilling on his sofa while talking.

- Im sleepy guys Imma go to bed. - Dongil said while whining.

- Good night. - Harry and I said in synch.

Dongil left the salon. Seongmin was sleeping on the floor and Changmin was still sober next to us.

- You look so cute together- Changmin said letting out a small laugh.

- I know - Harry said in a provocative tone.

- Why won't you stay tonight y/n ? - Changmin asked looking at me.

- Oh I didnt plain to tho and I dont wanna bother you.

- Harry will give you his bed. Right harry ?

- Yes sure. You wont bother anyone babe.

- Youre sure ? - I asked concerned.

- Of course y/n ! Stay with me tonight. Please.. - He almost begged me.

- Well, kids do whatever you want just dont be loud in the bedrooms please. - Changmin stood up and whined before going into the same room's Dongil went in earlier, leaving Harry and I alone.

- So you stay..? - He demanded poutting with his lips.

- Where are you gonna sleep harry ?

- On the sofa Im okay its pretty cozy he-

- Cant you sleep in your bed, with me..? - I put my hand on his not wanting to be alone in his dark room.

- Oh is it okay with you ? I dont wanna make you uncomf- I took his head in my hands and locked our lips in an eager kiss. I moved mines in a slow pace and I felt a wet texture. His tongue asked access for my mouth which I accepted.

- Lets go to my rooom. - He interrupted us, standing up from the couch locking his hands with mine. We made our way to his room trying our best to stay silent.

I made myself comfortable on his bed.

- Oh you might want some clothes for the night, dont you ? - Harry asked looking out for some pants and tee-shirts in his closet.

- Well I wont mind Harry.

- Have this then. - He handed me his clothes and he just stared at me for what felt like an eternity.

- Are you just gonna watch me stripping out of my clothes ?

- Oh my god yes sure sorry my bad ! - He excuses himself and turned around, his back facing me. Feeling suddenly in a teasing mood I threw my shirt on him after had removing it from me.

- Uh y/n ? - He said in a suprised tone. He could hear me laughing behind him and then I placed my hands on his shoulders.

- y/n ? - He turned around and found me topless, just some inches away from his face. He looked at me and tried to say something but nothing came out of his mouth.

- Youre okay Harry ? - I whispered. He didnt say a word but instead put his lips on mines. My arms found his neck while his found their place around my waist.

- I dont wanna rush things..- Harry confessed into my ear.

- Its okay me neither.. - I melted into his embrace and started to lose myself into his scent. He put me on his bed, then grabbed his shirt to out it on me. His moves were so gentle. He soon joined me in his bed and turned the lights off.

Ive never felt so comfortable in someone's arms. Harry made me feel like I was a crystal, his diamond.

- I love you - He said before kissing my cheek and with that we bith fell asleep in each other's arms.

Its the end guyss Im kinda disapointed with the ending but guys be prepared for a fanfic with a kdrama character im not telling anything yet hihi 🤫 but anyways this one was cute I guess also english is not my language so tell me if I made any mistakes ://

#harry june #dkb #harry june x reader #dkb imagines

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dongfangxunfeng · 1 year

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hi xin!! im not sure what youre up to in succession but what do you think so far? like do you have any characters or themes or anything thats really intriguing to you/that you think has been explored really well etc? i think theres sooooo much there but i get a bit too 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 to really articulate it well BUT i love hearing what other people are thinking abt it. mwah hope youve been well too 💜

HI VAL <333333 I LOVE SUCCESSY!!!! so im on the s2 finale (havent watched it yet but thats the today plan) and i have many. vibe related feelings not super coherent but yeah :)

first off its just soooo embarry that i understand wtf theyre about all the time <- businessmajorisms 😭 its genuinely so embarrassing when theyre saying shit like 'we need a poison pill white knight defence' and i know exactly what theyre referring to

my real 1st thought is that u def need to like. care about what they're parodying bc otherwise (1) to me its not as interesting if not, bc otherwise ur just glazing thru a lot of important context - probably why among other reasons i couldnt get into it the first time around when i watched like 2 eps (2) just based on brief observations it can make you a lil weirdinsane abt the characters when you treat them like. a regular guy from your shows (hence shit like tomgreg 😭😭😭)

the familial abuse dynamics. insane btw. logan @ his family vs logan what he presents to the world/people he wants things from vs logan what he presents to his employees..........and then you can see connor&willa and go ah yes . different flavour of abuse . insanity

UNRELATED BUT. tom & greg's voices are kind of in my head now i had an argument w myself this morning but in their voices and then i was like oops ive been watching too much

speaking of watching too much so /i/ am also a businessguy(ish. its complicated) who is . at this point running a newspaper (ish. we havent rlly started but ive been doing so much interviewing i am actually writing this in a break btwn them) so im like. omg what if im commiting mediacorporate crime and its like no. youve just been watching succession

ANYWAY CHARACTERS. shiv fascinates me. like yes her family esp logan doesnt really respect her opinions but also she is sooooo slimy. smth abt how ur sympathies for her get played with incessantly < shiv enjoyer

i hate tom sm but i cant hate hate him....actually i think that describes most of the characters. lol

the way theres so much dead air in this show is like. gweoifjiewjfoiwjefiw the awkwardness of it all. really adds to it

I WILL BE BACK I NEED TO FINISH MY INTERVIEWSSTAYTUNED

#asks #HIIIIIIIII<3 THIS WAS SUCH A FUN ASK

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blinkyblogblogbloggy · 3 months

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may 11-14, 2022

im gonna try to write about my feelings again because maybe thatll make me feel less like shit all the fucking time. i dont even understand why im so upset about this. like. i think its cuz i romanticized the shit out of him and let myself believe that he liked me and i kinda allowed myself to be vulnerable around him and that he was there when me and noah broke up so he like kinda helped me a lot that night and idk he is rly nice and maybe i was literally in love with him or still am. and maybe the problem is that i realized how shitty that i am that he couldn’t even wanna be friends with me. maybe im such a selfish manipulative bitch that even he couldnt handle it. and i thought that he liked me and maybe that made me feel good about myself. but also i felt like shit because i fucking cheated on noah basically. and he told me i deserved better and i thought he would be the better one but he had a girlfriend and that already made me feel like shit and that time we kissed it was the most pathetic thing ive ever done because it was bad. it was bad and he thinks im pathetic and idk how to stop it i think the root issue is that i think that he thinks im a pathetic stupid idiot bitch liar. and maybe i am. god i hate him but i have no right to because all ive heard is good things about him. god. what the fuck. i need to move on from this but i quite literally dont know how to do that without getting some sort of closure but also THATS SO FUCKING STUPID BECAUSE U DIDNT DO ANYTHING AND HE DOESNT OWE U ANYTHING god.

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think the main issue is that im not a good person and i hate people who are better than me and i guess that makes me even worse. like i hate cameron because she’s quite literally perfect. and it makes me fucking hate myself. shes so pretty and confident and smart and articulate and talented and she has all that i want rly. i saw her and thomas adams today and it literally made me wanna die. im never gonna have that. no matter how much i delude myself into thinking that im this nice hot smart person. no one has ever wanted me for more than a year. if that. i hate myself. i genuinely can’t think of one thing i like about myself. because im not good at school. im not good at art, i havent made a single decent thing in like half a year, i dont do anything outside of school, im ugly, and not skinny, and a liar and im not a good daughter. i hate myself. i think i like being in relationships because then the person can fall in love with some weird fake version of me and i can believe that maybe im half-decent. harry is just another example of how i cant maintain relationships that i care abt. i dont even think i have any genuine friends. im pretty sure they all dislike me severely. god. i. suck.

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im literally in love w him or smth because he’s so nice and i want him to fucking like me too i wish he did how do i get him to like me but also i want noah back because it was so much easier and i could just love him and he loved me and it wasn’t turbulent and weird. and dustin is nice but that’s abt it. i like him but that’s all there is to it and i feel bad for like asking him on a date cuz fuck. but harry is different because he doesn’t even like me lnao and i want him to like me so bad i want him to be in love with me and go out w me and be my fucking bf and it’s so stupid and pathetic but i like him sm

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impermanence of life it’s funny how i really thought we were gonna be together for a long time and how i thought i’d love him for so long not just him but seb too like i thkught she was it like that was the end and it’s so scary how blinding and deceiving and deluding it is to be in love or at least think that u are. even when i tried to be so so so overly pessimistic and realistic with noah i still rly thkught we’d be together for at least a couple years i mean im glad we didn’t cuz like then it’d be even fucking harder to get over it but yeah and i loved him i loved him so much and he made me light up and he loved me too and he also wanted to be with me and that somehow makes it even worse the fact that it’s a mutual temporary affliction jt sucks

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and like it’s so fuckinf scary how in love i was even with noah like so blindly in love or maybe it was good and i just don’t remember i wonder if there’s another universe where we’re still together . i don’t wanna be in it because i know we could both find someone who fits with us better but god it sucks when someone loves you so much and makes you feel so good but then they slip away even if they don’t want to

#2022

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t0shii · 3 years

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hello! i saw your requests were open and i was wondering if you could do a comfort drabble or smth with suna, atsumu and ushijima with a s/o who has scars on their hands from past injuries?

⚠️TW⚠️ (kinda ig?) i used to scratch my hands a lot to cope with my anxiety when i was younger so i a few scars along my hands and cause i'm black they stand out a lot and they bug me sometimes so i'd really like some reassurance from some of my favorite boys

i adore your writing and thank you!!!💕

% scars

.! timeskip! suna, atsumu, ushijima (sep) x gn!r

.! comfort + fluff/ scratching, injury, scars, etc. not proofread

.! hi there, ty for the request! enjoy the twilight series reference i made in suna's..... im so sorry i couldnt resist 🏃🏻‍♀️

suna

it was odd that you had been avoiding holding suna's hand all day, no matter what he tried you would either shove them in your pockets or push them up into your sleeves. he was over it, usually you liked holding his hand so he was confused- he knew he hadn't done anything... what it worth bringing it up? 'no' he thought, 'they'll hold my hand when they're ready'. but two days passed and still you were avoiding it, causing him to worry- maybe it was something he'd done?

"hey, y/n?" he finally came up to you one day, as he walked up to you, immediately you hid your hands under your thighs. his eyebrows furrowed as he sat next to you on the couch, "did i do something wrong?" you look at him confused "what do you mean rin?" "i mean, you haven't held my hand for three days now, did i do something?" immediate guilt creeps into your chest, you hadn't even thought he'd blame himself for something you'd been so insecure about. "rin... it's not like that, honestly. it's just my hands-" "what about them?" "well the scratch marks, don't they bother you? they're all rough, not nice to look at all." you pull your hands from under your legs, for the both of you to examine.

"well, i don't really care about that, babe. i didn't realize you were insecure about them, it's never bothered me before, why should it now?" he takes your hands in his, "besides, i think they're cool. it's like..... battle scars. ya know?" you chuckle at his attempt to lighten the mood, "yeah i guess so." "so, you don't have to worry about that, especially around me. got it?" "got it." suddenly his grin fades and his face is the most serious you'd ever seen, "and don't you ever, avoid holding my hand ever again- it's not gonna slide with me anymore." he tries his best to keep a serious face but fails as a giggle escapes his throat, "no but seriously don't do that, i was sad for like three days." "okay okay, you big baby."

atsumu

atsumu definitely noticed you staring down at your hands multiple times that day. the two of you had never really talked about the scars on your hands before, and he was totally okay with that! if you wanted to talk about you would and of course he wasn't going to pressure you into discussing it! but he couldn't shake the uneasy feeling he felt when he saw you look at them with that sad expression on your face.

"hey angel, c'mere?" he yells for you from your shared living room, you walk in to see him sitting on the couch, "sit, please." the stern look on his face had you worried "am i in trouble?" you ask, sitting next to him, as soon as the question leaves your mouth his expression softens, "what? no of course not, angel! i just wanna talk." he offers a grin and you smile nervously in return, "about what, 'tsum?" he takes a deep breath, "are you okay? anything bothering you?" he keeps the question open as to not overstep any boundaries and places a hand on your knee. you think, unsure if you should confide your insecurities to him, "well, i guess i have been a little insecure lately." atsumu lets out the breath he was holding, "about what, angel?" ".... my hands." you show him your hands, "see the scars on them? i just think.... i dunno, they're just not very pretty."

atsumu feels a slight relief that you've entrusted this with him but feels a sadness in his chest. "oh baby," he takes your hands, "you have nothing to be insecure about, really. i think everything about you beautiful, including your hands." he kisses a few visible scars, a smile forming on his lips, "i mean, if it makes you feel better, my hands aren't pretty at all. they're all calloused and stuff." he shows you the marks on his own hands from where he worked out a little too hard, "see? you're hands are way pretty, prettier than mine, even." he offers a smile before kissing every single scar and scratch visible on your skin.

ushijima

despite what people might think, ushijima is extremely observant, so of course he notices right away that you're hiding your hands more than you usually would. to his understanding, you were insecure about the scars you had on them and you didn't really enjoy talking about it, and he would never pry, but the more you pulled your hands away from his his own with that nervous look on your face, the more upset he became. honestly, it worried him. usually you initiate hand holding and would praise him when he did instead, ushijima couldn't shake the disappointment of you snatching your hand away.

for the third time today, you'd rejecting his hand, he was over it. "why don't you want to hold my hand?" he asks and though you're used to his direct personality, you didn't know what to say, honestly you were surprised he even said anything at all. "well-" before you can get another word in he asks another question, "is it the scars? you shouldn't be insecure about them" you stand there awkwardly, "h-how'd you know?" "well, you always fidget, sometimes you pick at them, sometimes you trace over them with your finger and other times you keep them hidden in either your pockets or sleeves. today you've been looking at them and hiding them more than usual, plus you keep rejecting hold my hand." you recall how he always gives you lotion and always takes your hand in his when you begin to pick at the scars on your hand, you'd never realized why he did it before until now.

"toshi, i didn't even realize you knew." you can't help the grin that forms on your face. "of course i did, and you don't need to be insecure about them."well it's not something i can help. i think they're ugly." a deep frown forms on his lips at your statement and he takes your hands into his, "that's not true, i think you're hands are beautiful, you should too. and they're hands, they still work the same with scars or without." he places kisses on your knuckles, "you don't need to worry about it anymore, i love them regardless."

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cocosstories · 3 years

Text

Pete Davidson One Shot

Do you think you could write a Pete Davidson x fem!reader where they’re dating and either she comes into snl or he talks about her during an interview? Just smth cute, fluffy, and funny :) thank you so much!!

"We are joined today by Saturday Night Live cast member Pete Davidson! Welcome Pete!"

"We are joined today by Saturday Night Live cast member Pete Davidson! Welcome Pete!""We are joined today by Saturday Night Live cast member Pete Davidson! Welcome Pete!"

You were sitting on the couch, just out of camera view as Pete did a virtual interview.

He had begged you to stay, saying interviews stressed him out and he needed you to be there to help him through it.

The two of you had been quietly dating for the past year and now, most days you were at his place. The one thing you never wanted to do was interfere with his work.

With the promise that no one would even know you were there, you happily agreed to stay and support him.

"Yeah, hi guys. Thank you."

Pete greets the interviewer.

"So Pete, hows life going out there in Staten Island? We know you've been doing the show but do you have anything else coming up that you can talk about?"

Pete waits for the lag of the internet to catch up the answers.

"Yeah, you know i have a few things I am getting ready to work on. Nothing I can really fully talk about yet but I am definitely staying busy."

He gives a nice smile and you laugh to yourself, knowing how much he hates doing things like this.

"Well, you look great. How has quarantine been treating you?"

The second interviewer asks.

"Yeah uh thanks. It's been alright you know. I am able to get out for the show and things like that so I'm not just here all of the time but I have a great support system around me."

People had been commenting a lot lately on how healthy and happy he looked.

"Your mom and sister right? It must be so great to have such a close family dynamic like that."

You could tell they were prodding him for information at this point. After his high profile relationships of the past, everyone was interested to see who he ended up with next.

"Yeah them and my girlfriend."

His answer surprised you to say the least. It wasnt as though you were hiding your relationship, it just wasnt something that was out in the public eye.

You weren't famous like most of his ex's. Just a normal girl who he had met through a friend of a friend.

"Girlfriend? Well do tell! Who is this mystery woman?"

The interviewers get more than excited at the news of your existence.

"Her name is Y/N, we've been together for about a year now and she is one of the reasons why I have gotten through quarantine as well as I have. She is truly one of my best friends and I am a lucky guy to have her around."

His words made you smile and brought a tear to your eye.

"Well she sounds great! Congratulations! A new episode of Saturn Night Live premieres this Saturday with host and musical guest Nick Jonas! Thank you again to Pete Davidson for joining us!"

Pete says his goodbyes and signs off, walking over to the couch and sitting with you.

"I guess we are no longer a secret now huh?"

You say cuddling up next to him.

"Yeah, sorry about that, I just couldnt keep it to myself anymore. You ok with that?"

He looks down at you as you think.

"Yeah, I'm ok with that."

You look up and smile before he leans down to kiss you.

#Pete Davidson One Shot #Pete Davidson x reader #Pete Davidson #Cocos stories

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dailyzzy · 3 years

Note

What If- and just hear me out for a second- redbone bojack horseman au.

Deku is Sarah Lynn (his job and giving up on his dreams really fucked him up, he mostly uses drugs as a way to cope with everything happening around him. Bakugou was the one that introduced him to alcohol for the first time when they were kids, bragging to his "friends" about drinking his mothers vodka once and calling Deku a cry baby for not wanting to try, Izuku drank, mostly out of anxiety and ended up getting drunk. Bakugou and his friend dragged him home and said that they found Izuku like that (inko lectured him a lot about It but Izuku couldnt bring himself to snitch) which was the start of his addiction.)

The story could pass through Bakugous pov mostly, still being a murder mistery, but with oh so much more angst. Kirishima gives me Todd vibes, so unfortunely for him Bakugou also isnt that good to him. He always assumes kirishima os an extra and didnt bother learning about his life until It was of interest to him. I think that the betrayal that happened in bojack horseman on the first season wouldve happened back in UA, Kirishima told bakugou about his insecurities (mostly with his quirk) and about this wonderful internship opportunity, Bakugou got scared of kiri leaving him once he made a name for himself and made him fail/miss the Interview (idk If he would Just make fake accounts and Bully kiri online so his anxiety was so high he wouldnt be able to do good or If he would just mix up kiris papers in order for him to miss the Interview).

Aizawa is a mixture of princess Carolyn and basicallly every single person on the show who noticed patterns and behaviors, but didnt do antything, hes an enabler. I woudl say later, when he realizes just how bad his ignorance affected those around him he would probably regret It, but for now him caring for Eri and the fact his students are already adults is the excuse he uses to not confront people. Thats not to say he isnt a good father, just like princess Carolyn he had a hard time adjusting parenting with work (he secretly has always wanted a child of his own, but never thought he would get the chance to have one) and pretends to give his child the childhood he never had.

Bakugou isnt the only 'villain' tho, i think It would be unfair to base the whole au around him or anyone in particular (many actions of bojack and character arcs will be displayed in different characters) Bakugou is a mixture of herb kazzaz and a side of bojack horseman. Shinsou was a dear friend to him (Hitoshi noticed the way he treated people, but never really cared) back in the first year of UA, they were rival-friends sort of deal. Shinsou introduced him to drugs, and a similar situation that happened with kid deku happened with teenage Bakugou, katsuki got caught and basically begged Shinsou to give out his dealers contact, otherwise Bakugou would be assumed to have been dealing and selling the drugs himself (seeing the large amount found back at his dorm room) hitoshi said he would do it, but Aizawa put quite a pression on him to deny anything, and thats exactly what he did. Bakugou was almost expelled and got a big red mark on his curriculum. He did save Kota on the Summer camp, and give quite some good advice.

The Bojack drug would probably be called Dynamight.

Shinsou is basicallly another side of bojack and Diane together (severely depressed, basically) , he has addiction problems (many times pushed people to get involved too) and has a deep self hatred, but still tries his best to be a better person. The problem is, hes still selfish and cynical, mainly the person at fault for Todoroki having had to go through rehab on his early 20's and many times inviting Izuku to do drugs together even though he knows just how bad dekus addiction is. He loves and cares for Eri like a little sister, and genuely tries to help Todoroki, but unfortunely good intentions dont mean good actions. Not to say he doesn't do anything selfless or good, he never pressioned Todoroki after rehab (neither Izuku after he became sober (Bakugou would be the one to lead him to his death)) and gives pretty good advice when hes sober. His biggest dream is to do sonething with his life, to make the world a little bit better. Hes quite intellegent and informed in todays affairs (him and Izuku have plenty of good convos and Todoroki isnt an ignorant fool mainly because of him). He worked on a case that investigated the hero comission and risked his entire career to try to expose a bit of Injustice, even If he wasnt sucefull he was still willing to risk It all for his morals.

Holyhock's arc could go through Todorokis eyes, he never quite forgave his mom and she was much more cruel than in canon, Rei would start showing signs of dementia very early in her life. Endeavor cheated quite a lot and had a illegitamet (idk how to spell) child with a side kick. He became sober ever since rehab and lived quite a good life, even with some shitty actions and shitty people around him. Things started to go down after his mom showed up and only worsened once she had to live with him.

(im kinda tired now so ill write more later.)

Wow, you really thought this through 😳 I'm impressed

And although Redbone characters are not as deep as Bojack's (or maybe not as realistic as Bojack's), some behavioral patterns can be found between these two anyway.

You have good ideas, if you ever write a fic or smth, hmu 👀

#anon #ask #redbone au #but bojack au #bojack horseman au

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insert-some-nice-emo-pun · 4 years

Text

this is about the lynz drama

i didnt wanna write this post

when this shit first started i told myself im not gonna say anything about it cause a)i hate drama in any form and b)no one cares about my opinion

but today i got so fed up with everything ive seen on twitter that here we are

im just gonna kind of explain what happened and share my opinion i guess? and feel free to share yours in the comments as long as you respect other people

so everything pretty much started when someone asked lynz about people accusing jimmy urine of sexual assault

(first of all why would they ask lynz?like i know theyre in the same band but still shes not responsible for his actions)

her responese mightve indeed seem strange, like she was defending herself tho nobody attacked her and it overall felt kinda off

then the whole argument started (most of the tweets are deleted now so its kinda hard to find out what exactly happened)

so first thing im gonna adress is how everyone seems to be "cancelling" her for saying you shouldnt believe victims, but what i understood after reading all of her tweets was that she said always believe victims unless you know theyre a manipulative liar and i think theres actually nothing wrong with saying this? please correct me if you think im wrong but i dont really find this problematic (the tweets are at the end of the post!)

i know that the first tweet, the only one that isnt deleted seems really off and she defo couldve answer better and you can critize her for this but i think she thought the person who asked her was reffering to smth jessicka said which kind of explains everything

jessicka has been saying messed up things about lynz for years, so i think we can understand why she reacted in this way

now why dont i believe anything jessicka says?

because she always talks how she has "a proof" that lynz said/did smth but she never actually shows that proof

even now, when lynz mentioned her in one of her tweets she responded yelling about the proof but didnt actually say anything new

one thing ive learned while being in different fandoms and stuff is never believe that someone said/did something unless you have a video of them doing so or they confirmed it on their offcial account on social media

if she really had the proof, why dont just show it to people?

now the second big thing that happened was the whole family thing

people have been talking about her family situation for years (im more of a new fan so i wasnt here back then so please correct me if i make a mistake here or anywhere in the post)

what we knew before is that she cut off her mother and sister - she didnt want to talk to them nor send them money

her sister claimed it was because they arent rich or famous

now scroll all the way down again to see the tweets

her mum and sis recorded a video responding to this

now this is totally subjective opinion of mine, but i got really bad impression from watching their vid and things they said later on twitter (search for amy greene on twitter, youll find everything there)

now you can believe me or not, but i have experience with this kind of family situations

my opinion on the subject is that when it comes to family problems no ones really innocent but sometimes things get so messed up that you shouldnt really judge people based on that

we basically get two sides of the story, and i believe that both of them probably got some things right, but im gonna stay on lynzs side

i 100% understand cutting off fanily memebrs, even as close as your mother and after watching this video i felt really sorry for lynz (again its just my opinion, but the things they both said about lynz reminded me so much of the situation from my family)

ive seen a lot of people bringing up that they said nice things about gerard, so they must be telling the truth because if they wanted fame theyd go after him instead or smth like this

i disagree with this opinion because its once again a behavior i know

noone said anything about gerard before

the whole thing was only about lynz

so why would they even bring him up?

well imo if their intentions were clear they wouldnt say anything about him at all, because what for?

if they said anything bad about about him all of the fans would attack them, get mad, and maybe not believe the rest of their story, so it was in their interest not to talk shit about him

but why did they say nice things? (ITS JUST MY OPINION PLEASE IM NOT SAYING I KNOW IT) 90% of people who would watch the video are mcr fans. and what is the best way to gain someones trust? be nice to them. say nice things about their idols, interests etc, its a known trick and its really manipulative. again i dont want to accuse them but it just seemed really off to me, and it also makes lynz look even worse, like if theyre trying to say that everyone here is nice and shes the only bad person around (yet again something i know really well)

so in my opinion they only talked about g to have mcr fans take their side and if its true its really manipulative but its just my opinion and i totally understand if you dont agree with me because i have no proof for this

i think this post is coming to an end so i want to say that i believe lynz is a good person

not a saint, not perfect, but not someone we should cancel or hate on

you have a right to dislike her, i understand and respect it, same with everything i said here - i accept that you disagree, you can write me a comment about it, just please dont spread hate

i hate going on twitter and seeing all of this drama

i havent been following her for a long time, i wouldnt even call myself her fan, but ive always seen her being really nice to fans on twitter and interacting with people a lot, well ive heard people talking about her being mean to fans in the past but i couldnt really find any concrete proof (video of that happening, im sorry but i really dont believe in posts from fan accounts from years ago)but im not saying it never happened, if you have a video feel free to send it to me

i doubt anybody read all of this, but thank you anyway

also here are the screenshots i could find

feel compeltely free to share your opinion in the comments, i sure will read it but im done with this whole drama

i just needed to get this off my chest after seeing all these people going crazy on twitter, im sorry if some parts dont make sense or have any kinds of mistakes, english isnt my first language and its also really late now

#lynz #lynz way #lynz ballato #lindsey way #msi #mindless self indulgence #lynz drama #drama #mcr

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woozi · 3 years

Note

the thirst tweets yza 😭😭😭 i cannot. as much as fun this was, we were so close to getting jaebs with cats <//3

headlocking sk 😭😭 DJJDSKSK i would stand there like wonu clapping in the soop, for you <3. it's hindi ( actually it's my 2nd language but i speak in it the most w ppl outside of family djdjdjk ) my mother tongue is almost dwording djdjdkdk </3 i think im last gen who still speaks it, kids these days only know hindi or english.

ALSO!!! the footwork in senses choreo???? i liked it sm <3 yugyeom makes it look so easy to move like that?!?

same jdjdkddk godddd sometimes it takes a month to complete a drama which i like and started on my own will and sometimes it only takes 3 days. it doesn't matter how much i love something if i won't watch it, then I won't watch or consume it at all 💀.

ohhh, i've known jamie as an after school club mc first and singer second. like there was this time i was suddenly obsessed w eric nam's before we begin album i think around that time i first listened to one or two songs of jamie ( it was all spotify's doing jddjks) but then i forgot abt both and went back to listening to my regular ones. honestly i feel like i've gotten to know and appreciate jype artists ( those i know ) more, only after they've changed agencies it could just be me or my timing tho djdjdjh. have you listened to hanbin's solo album? honestly it's been no.1 album from 1st half of 2021 for me. i was not even looking forward to it or even knew djdjsk but i'm so glad i did i really like the songs & lyrics.

almost whatever jackson has released after mirrors has been to my taste leaving few bsides here and there. i love lmly <3 idk why for some reason i tend to mix pretty please and lmly up a lot djdjsk maybe it's bc of white tee and jeans. both mvs concept and songs are fantastic but if i have to pick one w/ mv & only considering the song, i do love lmly a little bit more then pretty please. wbu? <3

mark kept saying ' when we go back ' during the live so i got more confused each time, went on twt and got to know djdjdk. twt list of both svt & got7 of update accounts is like my newspaper, in free time i open it to see what is going on, sometimes jdjddk.

and of course i know abt woozi's cover <3 i've listened to it a lot jdjdksk he's so <//3

i could listen to his voice all day.

there is one cover of 10 cm hoshi dropped last year i like it sm <3 it made me so happy!!, around that i was obsessed with some of 10 cm's songs. help is one of my most favorite.

i really really wish for dokyeom to cover more day6 songs or just any songs </3 would really appreciate one from mr. joshu_acoustic too 😿.

did you see the way dokyeom woke up with a smile on his face in 5th in the sopp ep <//3 he's so precious 😭 (i'll try to link next time idk links go through asks tho djjddj sometimes tumblr eats it up). i don't even know what a smile is for first 2 hours after i've woken up. also i think i like this (sk coming and karaoke one - 5th) ep a lil more bc of that half minute of singer cheol it served us. i need him to sing more omg <//3

the soop song tho it's so sweet 😭💕. i love love how they brainstorm and make songs it's such an interesting process. i love what going seventeen is now but i miss watching the song making & recording process (even rho they do show it in inse after cb but jdjdks). the one where they made gose song, recorded it and made choreo/mv i love. it's still remains as one of my most favorite ep. they compose & write songs so smoothly & make it look so effortless <3

thank you for letting me ramble abt silly little things and responding to them, yza <3 love hanging out w/ you. i hope you're also having fun djjddj (i'll try to keep these short fr 😭 djdkdk i feel a bit bad for making you read so much nonsense :3)

take care of yourself, yza <3 sending good week wishes. - 🪂🪂🪂

I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE I GOT TO SEE JAEBEOM READ THIRST TWEETS BEFORE MY VERY EYES WHICH ALTERNATE AU IS THIS 😭

also mood tbh we could've gotten something like jacks' puppy vid </3

LIKE WONU CLAPPING FJKDJKFDJFD in true infj fashion <3 wait naurr that's so sad </3 do they not teach it in schools?

ALSO YES OH MY GODDDDDDDDD house king show us ur fancy moves <3 as a fellow dancer i am throwing him my shoe rn <3 also i literally have never seen smth like this in kpop how did people fucking sleep on this icb it..

I FULLY RELATE HELLO????????????????? what dramas have u been watching? and which genres are u into? <3 i also just finished vincenzo today it was so good 😭 took me like.. a week, i think (?), though bc svt has SO MUCH content and i dont like being behind on svt shit esp bc i also run an update blog lmaooo 😭

WAIT I FORGOT SHE ALSO DID EMCEEING 😭 she's such a fun person </3 AND ERIC NAM FDKJDFJK i have one-sided beef w him lmao when he was still new to the scene he would reply to everyone's @s but he never replied to me so i felt v .. </3 (also this is what.. 13 year old me speaking so this def does not reflect how i feel abt him now JKJKFJKDFF) i also get that </3 i feel like jype doesn't manage them well (i dont know shit behind the scenes and shit abt the industry in-depth but u know... it Kind Of Shows esp w how the artists themselves speak abt the agency lol). and i have not!! i am truly a svtpoppie 😭 i will though bc u recommended it to me <3 i also have been seeing him frequently on tiktok lol, ALSO BC OF LEE HI!!

honestly i haven't been keeping up w his albums anymore just the title tracks so i cant say much 😭 i also def prefer lmly over pretty please i was actually obsessed w it for a while!! i love jackson's vision so much though, the cinematography is EVERYTHING

literally reading abt what our boys have been up to like reading the morning paper KJDSFKJDSJKSJKD

V GOOD FOR U TO HAVE COME ACROSS THE COVER... I JUST DISCOVERED IT BY ACCIDENT 😭 also i have to agree although i definitely do not want to admit that i am more than willing to listen to some man sing to me all day 😭😭😭😭😭 jihoon's voice is just... different to me for some reason. i have a hard time picking between him & seokmin tbh </3 hbu, who's ur fave svt vocalist?

ALSO YES THAT WAS SO CUTE OF HIM!! AND V ON BRAND TOO </3 the way u listen to 10cm..... im giving u an award rn <3 im guessing you listen to k-indie too?

DK THOUGH... I'M VERY MUCH WILLING TO ADMIT THAT I'D LISTEN TO HIM ALL DAY.... something about him... AND NOT THE JOSHU_ACOUSTIC FJDJFDJKFD 😭😭😭 i hate his username so much- why... WHY...

I DID!!!!!!!!! and i was so surprised too bc.. who wakes up smiling?????? what'd he dream of???????????? he's such a happy person i cant imagine what thats like 😭 the first thing i do when i wake up is make the >:| face JFJKFDKJFD also oh my god i just read that you're experiencing the same thing 😭😭 bestie trait!! KJJKFDKJFD ALSO YOU COULDN'T BE MORE RIGHT?????????? im always campaigning for vocalist coups im SOOO glad u feel the same way <3 his voice is just so comforting to me </3 idk i just really like his timbre

and v true omg i'm always fascinated to see how they actually work all this out!! the bts recording/choreo making vids are also my favorite gfkjdfkjdfj HOW ARE WE SO SIMILAR WE MIGHT AS WELL BE THE SAME PERSON 😭also jihoon in that gose behind vid........... in universe factory............... i still think about that Look from time to time... 😭this is also why i respect the boys sm tbh. everyone in the industry undeniably works so hard but to actually get this much creative freedom and to basically lead the group and their direction music and performance-wise is so insane to me... no wonder jihoon's always in his studio. i couldnt be happier that they get to live off of doing what they like im also so so proud of them they must work so hard <3 esp w all the content they're giving us.. icb it's always like this in caratland im so used to being an ahgase that gets like.... 1 cb a year😭

AND NOOO OMG DON'T BE SORRY I REALLY LOOOVE GETTING UR MESSAGES </3 and i love how lengthy they are makes me feel like ur just not making small talk (i hate small talk sm 😭) and that you're actually interested <3 i genuinely love bonding w u through these little asks i can never thank u enough for sending them <3 i hope ur having a lovely week as well!! u can always talk to me even if it's not kpop related and u just want to talk abt life or when u need some cheering up <3

#🪂 anon #anon #y.ask #long post

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neo-shitty · 3 years

Note

toffee!

no dearest, dont worry, ive been super busy with exams and auditions so i couldnt reply to this, super sorry ;n; but im here now so here we go!

mmm same, tasteful smut is preferable, tho rare. oh no! pls dont feel pressured to follow me on anything, i post very sporadically on that acc so you probably wont see much yet haha

hehe sometimes it just be like that. mmm real life isnt happy, so it makes sense that angst is more realistic, plus people are shitty /hj so its easier to have smth to base the characters and action off. but if angst is what you feel comfortable with, im glad you found it and you can write it so well!

yes i totally agree! they just suck you in, there is no escape. mmm indeed. i guess i just (and im sure you feel the same way) wish that they would be able to stick to what they are good at, and what they enjoy, rather than what will make them the most money and recognition

hehe i dont mind! im here if you wanna rant abt the amazingness that is he, i know the feeling of almost bursting from having to talk abt smth and not being able to :) yesss hes just so comfortable and familar even tho obviously we dont and can never truly know him. hes just like a good good friend. (albeit one whos abs we rave abt). :( ohh im sorry you were in a bad place, but its good that you were able to find something to help, im sure channie would be very happy to know he helped someone :) hehe i find myself listening for him in all their tracks, its a bit like felix in that its quite distinctive and very satisfying haha. YES seonghwa is just *wordless mouthing of amazement* mmm, its going to be super hard for them to top that, fever and drunk dazed were *chefs kiss* but hopefully theyll be better soon, ive been so worried abt all of them, with the whole covid thingo, especially nikki, hes only 15 and hes rlly sick away from his parents and his home :(( poor thing. man sunoo's immune system of absolute titanium, hopefully the rest of the boys are feeling better :(

yes i KNOW right. :((( huh i guess its strange cos i cant wait to get out of high school and ur wishing you could go back :') ahh that must be strange

oooh cool! ahuh yes, im sensing a type lol. ooh fellow jake, hyuka and lisa bias! for me, nikki and jennie are bias wreckers and im not super into txt but yES i agree, he always looks impeccable. i see what you mean with jake! hes got this kinda awkward charm from what little ive seen of him. mmm well... as a chan, seonghwa and namjoon bias, i can sympathise with having a definite postion type

no darling! they wouldnt be wasted at ALL. yes, you must tell me if you are ever going to leave here :((

but on brighter topics, i finished all my midterms and had my first therapy session this week so thats good! how are you feeling today? anything else you want to discuss? hope you're doing well :)

<3 w.a. 🐺

yoooo i was starting to worry about where you were but i remembered that you talked about exams. it's alright! take your time. also auditions o.O good luck with that!!

oh don't half joke people are shitty. they really are. funny how we talk about how we're talking about how angst is my element but i just finished writing a fluffy chan fic.

yeah :( i also hope that the money making thing wouldn't be their top priority but it's still a business industry so i get why the marketing is done that way.

i rambled to an irl about chan today so idt my head would explode from keeping chan chitchat in. chan is as safe space as an idol can get for me. i want to thank him for quite literally saving me in 2020 someday. it's the first thing i'll mention if i get to have a fancall with him.

i'm currently waiting for ateez comeback! i'm hoping deja vu won't disappoint bc the song isn't bad at all o.O it takes me back to my 2nd gen roots even. abt enhypen i heard 2 are back and posting? idt they got the worst of the symptoms + they're young and i'm sure their immune systems aren't too weak.

LMAO. it's because high school was a lot easier than uni so if i were to choose from the two evils, i'd choose the lesser one.

abt my biases? really? o.O bc i've always been told that i don't have a clear bias HAJHA. i'm glad we have a few similar biases <33 the definite position type HAJH you and my friends have the same thing going on. she's all for rappers tho.

i'll tell you if i ever choose to leave. i doubt it would be any time soon xd

congratulations on finishing all your midterms and i'm glad you got to go to your therapy session. how was it? i hope you're doing well. go and take care of yourself! reward yourself a little for finishing the exams :>

my feet and legs are sore as fuck. i've been dancing the whole day and i haven't been exercising a lot so a day full of just moving around kinda shocked me. i'll be sleeping in a few though so i hope i feel better in the morning.

#toff.asks #wild anon 🐺

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dead-thorin · 4 years

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some nice things happened this week. Wednesday was the department’s finals and i was rushing around and at one point i got to my desk and there was a gift. My friend got me smth for christmas and in the card she wrote consider this a birthday, christmas, thanks for everything u do for me gift and it was a chicken ornament :’)

On thursday one of the TAs brought his 7 month old daughter in and i got to hold her and she was literally so adorable. At one point, after she stopped being fascinated by the tree, she started getting upset bc she couldnt see her dad so my boss, who was holding her, walked to the copy room to show her where he was and she immediately stopped crying. Also, he’s a really funny and chill parent like idk how to describe it. She was wearing a jacket with the hood having like dinosaur scales on it and he and my boss took it off her so she wouldnt overheat. I helped him put it back on her and he, very calmly, was like and she doesnt like putting on clothes so shes going to go into a rampage. And as he strapped her to his chest and put on his own jacket he once again very calmly was like and shes gonna get overheated and go into a rampage again. he also joked about how toned and fit he was getting bc she likes it when he holds her in his hands and does squats bc of the movement

Three faculty members are expecting kids soon, with one of them being actually pregnant. I made them baby blankets and last week I started giving them to them. The one who is pregnant was like omg thats ridiculously sweet jordan im gonna cry and gave me a hug 😭Another one whos wife is expecting in early january thanked me and was a little awkward bc hes the type who doesnt know how to receive gifts, which like same. Today I ran into them as my friend and i walked into the supermarket and they were leaving. My friend saw them first and said hi and i noticed afterwards and was like hey! And his wife was like Oh! he made the blanket right? And when he confirmed she was like omg thank you so much that was so nice!!! I havent had the chance to make you a thank you card yet!! Also on Thursday i gave the last blanket and i didnt know how this guy was going to react bc hes very... stereotypically math. He hardcore cant make eye contact, he doesnt make conversation unless strictly necessary, and hes very awkward, nervous, and anxious. Over the semester I noticed that hes gotten better and like he still is nervous when talking but he talks a bit more and he makes way more eye contact. So I gave him the blanket and he was like ??? and i was like oh its a baby blanket! And he was like whos giving it??? and I was like Me? I made it for you since youre expecting a kid and he was like omg??? and he was super happy omg and we talked a little bit about it bc this is his first kid and he said he and his wife were a little bit nervous bc they didnt have family around since shes from china and hes from switzerland and i was like yeah but most of the people here have had kids so i think theyll help and he was like yeah but its still a little bit nerve wracking and i was like true true. He also was liek volunteering information instead of just strictly answering the question and idk this was the most hes spoken with me and it was super nice and pleasant. im really hoping i can see baby pics next semester

Yesterday there was an end of semester party and i was hoping to spend at the most like an hour there since there were apparently gonna be a TA or 2 who didnt like me there and i just wanted to chat with a friend who graduated and one who was leaving next week. So I stayed there until 2am about and then we moved to the guy whos leaving’s house and stayed there until 4am and it was super chill. Most of the TAs were drunk too which was funny. But the highlight for me was that I got to chat with one of them who I only had a little bit of conversation with from time to time at the office and we talked for most of the party and it was super nice. He’s trying to find a job in the southeast bc his family lives there and we were talking with a TA and she mentioned like the perfect job position for him because its a good location and what he wants to do. It opened like 2-3 days ago? SO i took out my phone and started writing an email to him and asked her to repeat the job title and he was like what are you going to send this information to everyone? and i was like no? Im emailing it to you because youre at least a little drunk right now and might forget so this will be a reminder so u have this info later and can apply and he was like omg ur so nice and gave me like a bear hug. Also the guy who is leaving gave me a hug when i left his house and during the night he mentioned that i was invited to his wedding next year so thats cool.

TAs have gotten exam results and one of them called me upset about it and we talked about it and she feels better about it now. At one point she was like Jordan youre so nice omg and i was like thanks i try and we talked for over an hour and it was nice.

Yesterday i decided to take out my helix piercings because its been over 6 months (closer to 7 or 8 I think?) and they have had a bump on them since Ive gotten them. The hole is already closed and the bump is going down so thats good! It wasnt a lot of money and I might get it repierced but idk bc that was one of the more painful piercings and its annoying to soak. The rest of them are doing p well except my nostril has a little bump/scar? on it but hopefully thatll go away and it doesnt look bad.

I got to pet 3 cats and 2 dogs this week and my friend gave me a jumpsuit that doesnt fit him! Hopefully next semester we can go to a club or smth and I can wear that.

#post from the blogger

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monohart · 5 years

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stardust. (idol!au)

ft. huang renjun, failure and a secret relationship.

i’m back after a long break, haha. this was an old writing that had been sitting up in my drafts for a while... happy 2019! please spend this year showing more love to renjun. :)

thank you, and enjoy!

when you were cut from the line up for sm’s new group renjun was 100 times more devastated then u were

u were like hey rj cmon don’t worry i’ll be fine??? i’m sure i can audition for another company or smth?? or wait for the next unit debut??

u even jokingly said maybe u could debut in an nct unit but he couldn’t bring himself to smile

and your chest :(( hurt :(( from seeing him so hurt ;;;

ofc for as long as you remember y’all had been talking about both debuting under sm at the same time so y’all could be chasing your dreams and not be too far away from each other

but that plan failed when renjun debuted first with nct dream and had his schedule Packed w nct promotions and concerts and stuff

he and the other nct guys would sometimes let u sit behind the camera in vlives

this one time omg

(( ok so refer to this for a visual :) ))

u sat behind the camera in the chenle jaemin renjun react to baby don’t stop vlive

even though u were hella scared to be kicked out chenle was like HEY DW I’LL FIGHT ANYONE WHO THINKS YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO BE THERE OKAY

so u snuck out of your practice session slightly earlier to watch them

renjun was so excited u were there but obvs he had to keep it together for the live

then!! lolololol rip your manager found out u snuck out of practice and found u in the room and pulled u out of the room

(u kno that moment when they all looked behind the camera and then turned down the music.. yeah issa bc ur crazy manager almoST ruined the mood)

manager scolded u outside the room for a good few minutes and then told u to get yourself together

and u stood outside the room for a bit longer after manager left

and u were literally about to leave but then guess who u ran into!!!

chittaphon knew about u and rj since the day he met u and him both

it was kinda funny really bc u and rj stood rly awkwardly next to each other at this company event a few years ago and y’all were standing around the other dreamies and some other trainees and suddenly renjun’s hand brushed the side of your leg and u glance at him and he smiles at u and u look away smiling

AND chittaphon, who happens to be taking a nice long sip of his soda SEES THIS and spits his soda out

accidentally sprays soda onto jeffery’s back

but yeah thats another story

anyway!!!!

ten sees u sulking outside the door and peers in and sees renjun and hears bds

u know that smile smirk ten does when he knows whats Up™.

yeah he does that and be like

“eyy why don’t u go in???”

then u give him a breakdown of what happened with skipping practice and being caught by the manager

and hes like :o

but chittaphon is chittaphon so he grabs you by the wrist and pulls you back into the practice room and hides you in a corner just out of view

and then he sneaks onto them!!

then jaemin... quick-eyed, lovely doe-eyed jaemin... sees u hiding and nudges renjun ever so slightly

he sees u and before he gets flustered ten’s all over him asking how the mv was and flustered rj tries to keep his cool while showering chittaphon w compliments

and u know how ten looks at him like That :^)

and jaemin keeps peeking over their shoulders

yeah :))

OK I SPENT TOO LONG DESCRIBING THIS

but anyway, on that night u were cut from the line up

after the news got to him he sits down and was just like

because he knew how much debuting meant to u and

and... YOUR DREAMS TO BE TOGETHER :(( debuting together and always being close to each other

and u mentioned before that if u dont debut in the next five years u prolly would quit the entertainment industry

maybe go back to school and study some or idk work in a less chaotic industry

in that moment he remembered what u said and was a little heartbroken too

he tried to find you in your usual practice room but u weren’t there and he shouldn’t be loitering around so he gave up and let you have some space

bet u he sulked all the way home

you had travelled back to your dorm because u needed some time alone oof

it took u a good few hours to deal with the news and when u were ready to talk about it again, it was like 3am but u still gave his mobile a call

he picked up on the second ring and said to meet him outside your dorm in a few mins and y’all can go take a walk or smth for some fresh air

so u guys go to the park for a nice quiet walk in the dead of night hhh

u had so many things to say but mostly u were worried with your relationship w him and how y’all were supposed to balance that out given his priorities with nct and you as... just a trainee...

u didnt have to explain anything or other bc he suddenly goes

“what if we went public with our relationship?”

u look up at his face that was hidden behind a mask and his glasses

u deadass thought he was kidding but his that look in his eyes were like hella serious

“just think about it for a second. maybe we don’t have to bring it to the fans, but at least let the company know”

and u were like no way they’ll just do anything to keep yall apart

he didnt answer after that and not too long later yall started heading back to your dorm

it was almost 5am and the streets were still dark and renjun had an arm around your waist and you leant against him and yall walked slowly bc honestly u guys haven’t slept a wink and its been a Really Long day

your dorm was a street away from his

actually he stops about a street or two away from your dorm bc another idol group also lived in the same building as u and there were always sasaengs and people w cameras outside your dorm

u were a trainee so it didnt bother u but renjun was renjun :,)

plus he actually wanted sum privacy so he could kiss u.. so...

hsaksdnd

there was a narrow alley just around the back of the apartment block next to yours

u would never go there alone kasdnj it was scary at any time of the day

tbh

u wouldn’t go even if someone was there with u

maybe it was the heat of the moment or u were just so down that day

it didn’t rly bother u when renjun gently backed u up against the wall and hugged u n took off his mask n buried his face in the crook of ur neck

and that immediately put a smile on your face ur like baby wyd its 5am

hes looks at u like :(( and says “i miss u” in a quiet quiet voice & in his mother tongue

u knew what it meant and hearing him say it in chinese made you uwu to mars

then he showers u with like tiny tiny butterfly kisses and he wraps his arms around u to make u feel safe and warm

which u do!!

he holds u up too when ur knees buckle a bit but then just continues kissing u hehehe

its all sweet and innocent but his kisses last just a tiny bit longer each time, as if hes scared that you’d run away

after he finishes kissing u he meets your eyes and u literally watch his orbs go all soft and he hides his face in your neck again while u mutter about how much of a big baby he is

the goodnight was!!!

the hardest thing y’all had to do omg

he literally didnt want to let u go

and when he did and when u started walking toward ur building u kept looking back, wanting him to head off but he didnt and stood there waiting for u to go in

and u didnt want to go in without knowing he was on his way home and was safe on the walk back wdf it was almost 6am

then when u were almost at the door u saw he hadn’t moved an inch

so u run back to him

he was still standing at the spot where y’all parted - which was a few streets down and out of sight

he scolds u for running back out but he smiles when doing so and u snap his mask back onto his face and kisses him over the mask like 200 times and u couldnt see but hes like dying from the giggles

anyway eventually y’all go home :,) it just took forever :,)

the next day u head to the building in the afternoon to catch up on some sleep

u were a bit guilty to find out renjun went back to work at 7am which meant he practically didnt get any sleep

y’all brush shoulders in the cafeteria but he was walking w hyuck and his manager so u couldn’t stop and chat

tho u couldn’t help but notice his manager steal a glance at u when u walked by and he had this really weird smile on his lips

made u go like huh.,, maybe he recognises me from the many Brief encounters yall had before

anyway u were doing some vocal and keyboard practice later in the afternoon when the door to the private training suite opened and two loud boys stumbled in

made u rly surprised bc u never expected it to be them??

it was taeyong and winwin??

they were both looking at u like :))) as if they did something great :))

taeyong introduces himself formally but you’re like ,, um u know we’ve met before at this function and hes like OH,,, sorry

anyway they were there to tell u how renjun couldn’t shut up about u since he went back to the dorm last night and now all of nct knows about everything to know about u and him (if they hadn’t already)

you’re just like .,, oof what embarrassing stuff did he say

they’re like NO ALL NICE STUFF,, a bit cringey at times

but !! nct wanted to help u

so earlier today

johnny and jaehyun spoke to their managers and night night producers and asked if they could hire a third radio dj - yknow someone who also speaks english and is really nice and entertaining and funny and cool like u are!!

that idea is now In The Talks

winwin brought up a variety thing china line and their managers had been thinking about for a while and also asked if they could consider u

nct managers be like ok so who actually is this trainee and why are all 18 boys obsessively asking to include her in nct activities

later that day when u see renjun again he was just heading off but he came around your practice room to see u before he left

thankfully u were the only one left at practice as the others were away busy preparing for their debut or smth :,)

u didnt hear him come in bc u were sitting in the middle of the room on the floor scrolling replying to week old texts oop hehe

renjun sneaks up behind u and hugs u from behind and kisses your cheek

he got a bit scared when u didn’t respond as explosively as he thought... for a second he thought he got the wrong person poor bean he was so nervous hhh

you chuck your phone aside and tackle him and he falls onto his back and yall kinda lay there on the ground for a bit

and you told him about taeyong and winwin visiting u and he just smiles

“you inspire me.”

“me? inspire you? you’re huang freakin’ renjun, and i, of all people, inspire you?”

“yeah”

“don’t understand u sometimes”

he turns his head to look at u and u turn to look at him and he kinda just admires you for a while then reach over and touches your cheek

it wasnt even a sweet caress or anything he literally just

touched

your cheek

“renjun what the heck”

then he laughs and u laugh and u snuggle against him and for the first time that week both of u feel completely at ease bc even though the dream u guys shared at the beginning was completely shattered,

y’all would still find a way around it

and knowing so many people around u still supported u guys meant so much

especially to renjun bc u were his everything and he’d do anything for u

and i mean it!!!

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narahalara · 5 years

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a mini update to myself about my life that ive been procrastinating on for a week now lol

instead of reading my article that i have a quiz on tmrw im gonna type this cause ive been meaning to type this but been delaying it idk why.I wanted to write this i think cause i havent really updated myself in awhile, and i think it be good to look back on and reflect for future me to read or skim through if I am still the same LOL.

Ok so the last couple weeks, i actually got really stressed and sleep deprived and i was having a lot of high and low days. like some days ill be on fire and super productive and happy then other days i can barely get out of bed and was so tired. I was sleeping at like 2-3 am straight which is actually not normal for me cause yes i am a granny that sleeps usually around 11-12ish. Anyways, I was tired from studying for my exams, like i was pulling these all nighters, to the point where on wednesday last week, i burnt out literally. i had 2 midterms the next day (halloween) but i couldnt do it anymore so i just prayed that all the info i had studied would be retained and i slept at like 7 pm and did not wake up until 9 am the next morning so i felt like i temporarly died or hibernated for 14 hours lol but it helped me recuperate cause i was dead tired physically and mentally. Then I had my midterms, and thankfully they were “ok” they were still hard ofc but for the most part I dont think i failed so yeah. and then for halloween my roomies and i had dinner together and we drank and made desserts it was so cute and nice as like a treat for finishing those midterms.

so after that i got a chance to settle down cause for the weekend i only had to study for my final midterm that was this monday, and thankfully the material is pretty straightforward. The test was multiple choice and it wasnt hard, but there were some questions on the student presentations and i skipped that day cause it was wednesday when i fell ill and couldnt go to class :( so hopefully i can get at least a B but thats ok.

In addition to this, i also had to skip my gym session on wednesday which at first i was a little sad about cause i have been pulling a really good streak since like late june lol, but i really pushed myself on friday and sunday (and even today which is tuesday lol). and but heres the kinda like woah idk how i feel about thing like half happy but half concerned. i dropped 8 pounds this month unintentionally. which i have some theories? i think its 1) i walk ALOT back n forth from my apt to campus 2) ive been pushing myself pretty hard at the gym 3) i eat a lot but its really healthy like example salmon and brown rice and a ton of veggies, but think there has been a deficit in calories on some days?? idk like i dont think im eating less but maybe i am?? 4) ive been FAMISHLY HUNGRY LIKE ALL THE TIME LIKE RN I AM HUNGRY EVEN THOUGH I ATE DINNER A COUPLE HOURS AGO, idk why im sooooo hungry even though i eat alot but im not ganing weight.

Like my normal weight this year is 117-120 lbs. but now its like i wake up 110 lbs and by the end of the day im only like 112-113 lbs. like i havent seen those numbers since freshmen year of high school. and sometimes i wake up famished and fatigue, like a lil weak until i eat smth. idk, maybe i need to start eating snacks throughout the day. in all fairness i have been just eating like 2 meals a day but there like BIG. maybe i need to change it up. I have noticed i lost weight it my stomach which is nice, but i think i did lose weight in my legs which im sad about cause its really hard to grow my quads/hamstrings and glutes cause when i lose weight thats usually the area that will be targeted first which i do not like. so i guess i have unintentionally cutted this month lol so i might as well try bulking which is mean im gonna have to try to lift heavier (yikes im still trying to fix my unstable n uncoordinated ass lol) and eat a lot more than i already am even though i thought i was eating alot. ok for example this morning i ate an omellete that contained 3 eggs, mushrooms, tomato, spinach, brocolli, and a bunch of cheese with orange juice. then for lunch i had a blaze veggie pizza (since i dont eat meat) with a salad. then for dinner i ate baked salmon with mayo and a whole bunch of veggies WITH CHEESE and more juice, and i even had bang pre workout for my gym session today and a cup of coffee to keep me awake during my night chem lab AND I AM STILL HUNGRY RN MY STOMACH IS GROWLING AS I TYPE THIS LIKE WHAT. so yeah im just hoping i do not drop anymore like this is fine, once i start going below 110 thats like a danger zone and i probably should ask someone professional if this is normal haha.

ok next im deciding if i should go home, but i think i will because 1) need to do laundry 2) running out of food 3) miss my sissies 4) might wanna see my 8th grade loml LOL 5) allow me to reset, cause i feel like today is officially the ned of first half of fall quarter, like from this point forward its officially a new start again in a way since the finals are not “cumulative” for the most part. like i am resetting.

also as i said ive been having some highs and lows which has been kinda hard cause on the days im really happy i know that im gonna hit sadness again, and i do but then i get ok like its been really huge fluctuations lately, it can also possible be due to daylight saving but i dont think thats a huge factor cause this has been happening weeks before daylight saving (also my sleeping schedule is messed up lol)

i think i’ve just been busy lately with trying to balance school, work, volunteering tasks (yes i finally worked the courage to do health related stuff LOL like im getting training in a few weeks but i was stressing cause it interferes with my night labs but shoutout to my hella chill ta who said i can go to his other section i just gotta notify the professor so praying that it works out) and i know i am still in that not really sure what i wanna do in life but this is like a good thing i feel its stepping out of my comfort zone), and self care like going to the gym eating healthy, trying to give myself rest and breaks, remind myself to socialize even though im so introverted i know i still need human contact etc. so yeee.

ok last thing i dont wanna really write about but whatever its part of this. remember self when you said by one month you will be completely and utterly over him and you can move on with your life. well the first half happened, yeah your highly superficial stupid unrealistic emotions are gone but literally down 90% of my healing im talking like late october hes gotta hit me up again and you know me like i cant resist LOL i hate me whatever you know its fine its better i think im in a better place/my head is better screwed on and i know what i want which is nothing LOL like i still maintained my other side bois i didnt completely stop talking to them just to talk to this one kid like i did couple months ago and i feel like my mind is more occupied with other things lately (even if unfortunately some of those things give me stress) but yeahhhhhh but we were supposed to meet up but it isnt even happening honestly i think i might just keep moving and searching for another to just mess around with cause honestly i cannot wait forever so yeah.... future me forgive me in advance for being weak LOL

ok i think thats all for the most part right now im feeling good, I know lifes not always so happy and productive, but i have to remind myself theres always gonna be good days, and with every bad day is a day closer to a better one. so you got this narah! OK NOW I NEED TO READ MY ARTICLE CAUSE I ACTUALLY DO HAVE A QUIZ ON IT TMRW AND I DONT GET IT end rant here

#vent

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thexfoils · 7 years

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i’m waiting for laundry so to kill some time i’m gonna share some of my favorite Alan Turing Things i’ve learned so far from his bio by andrew hodges (99/10 would recommend, if ur not a Math Whiz some parts are Tough but overall it’s p good)

-called seagulls and the sounds they make “quocklings” when he was small

-charmed all the society ladies his mom would paint watercolors with (had a sense of humour when he was older too)

-lived in sailor suits as a kid and his older brother john was Absolutely Done with them cuz they were complicated to put on so he always had to help alan

-got caught burying his toy boats and when asked why he said he was trying to see if they’d grow into life-sized boats like seeds to flowers

-parents had to go back to india cuz his dad was in the indian civil service and his leave was up so they told alan to be good and he said, “i will, but sometimes i’ll forget!”

-there was a workers’ strike the day alan was trying to catch a train to get to his school for the start of term so instead of waiting at the station he set out on his bike without his luggage and just freakin rode about 60 miles over two or so days to get to school, made the paper the next day

-him and christopher! but also at public school the others kids had a couplet about alan “watching the daisies grow” instead of playing sports

im forgetting stuff but flash forward to his king’s college/princeton days

-at 21 this guy wrote home to his mom that he wanted a teddy bear for his 22nd bday cuz he “couldn’t remember having one at home growing up” so of course his mom did and he named it “porgy”

-friends would come over to alan’s rooms (which were always a Mess cuz he had Better Things To Do) to find magazine clippings of cute guys on his walls and porgy would be set up before the fireplace with a book propped up in front of him by a ruler, when asked why alan would reply, “porgy’s feeling very studious today”

-actually got a PhD down the road but rarely ever called himself a doctor cuz he didn’t care about stuff like that really but more importantly he didn’t want people telling him about “all their ailments”

-always tried to romance the guys he got close to but they all gently refused him (except one) but they always stayed close friends with him anyways

-his friend sponsored a viennese refugee and alan thought it was such a good idea he did it himself and paid for the kid’s public school education and then did what he could to help the kid through college

bletchley park stuff

-figured out that he could count the revolutions of his bike tires and predict from that when the chain was about to come off so he could repair it before it happened, b/c of this tho no one else could/was allowed to ride his bike

-actually Loved joan clarke but couldnt go through with the marriage, they were engaged for more than a few months tho and were Very Good Friends

-knew he couldn’t get a nice replacement tea mug in war times so he’d lock his to one of the fences or smth, sometimes people would pick the lock to tease him

-known around bletchley as The Prof.

-actually did write that letter to Churchill but he didn’t do it alone

-had to be the liaison between the bletchley group and american intelligence so he had to go back over to america, he told joan the first thing he’d do was buy a hershey bar

that’s it for now but i’ll probs add stuff as i read more

#longpost #sorry guys i just Love alan turing #he's v interesting #im leaving a lot out but its getting long #the imitation game seems v v dramatic in comparison #that might just be the writing style tho who knows #alan turing

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snap-spark-blog · 7 years

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taeyong meta (w citations) cuz im losing my mind

originally on twitter

UMM I started furiously typing without ANY organization but im here to summarize that this is a shitty essay about taeyong's change of character over the years and how it's driving me NUTS

--- the thing is i never bought into the whole "taeyong used to be a bad boy" narrative and the reason i started stanning him to begin with was finding out he's actually a gentle boy from NCT life and other interviews and realities shows and like......generally my thoughts on the scandal (which changes all the time and i dont know the whole story) is that first of all it's a stupid ass fucking issue to have a scandal around and that second it seems overboard to the point where SM rolled with it and made him apologize demurely and appear guilty rather than defend him in order to push his soft boy image even more? because they were creating a "cold and unapproachable" image FOR him during debut and actively having him and other members demonstrate that he's "actually really gentle" like, this was SM's own doing, which means as time went on especially when CB rolled around you can start to see that the "soft boy" who cooks and cleans and takes care of members like a good leader image is to some extent a construction as well because taeyong is not rly a natural leader, there are members who begin to stand out as having that role instead and taeyong can comfortably retreat a little into the regular person that he is WHICH, at that point, i loved even more because hey he's happy and that makes me happy, i know enough about the person at the core of "taeyong" to bias him no matter what kind of a person he is cuz its always within the bars of standard deviation. to me his image progressed smth along the lines of this starting from rookies era till about...like limitless even they really wanted to push his image as being a dancer (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8wEdZKC0orM), and when i first saw this i was in luv but the more i got to know him the more i realized this is something they would've choreographed for kai, it's a style of sharp snaps and smooth curves and hitting the points that kai loves doing, kai taemin etc like knowing SM's history of dancers this feels more like them than taeyong, and ofc being a rookie ty must learn to be ABLE to technically execute things like this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LvniaVnTKQI), cool sharp and hard hitting, which falls in line with the "seems cool but is sweet" dichotomy they had for him around NCT U/FT era (like grey hair era) and i ALWAYS think about this interview (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YZMb7t_cH10) where they asked the team dance or music aND LIKE BESIDES WINWIN WHO OBV CHOSE DANCE TY CHOSE DANCE BUT I NEVER UNDERSTOOD IT BECAUSE its so different from how im used to when i watch dancers like i dont think taeyong necessarily worships dancing because he seems to LOVE music as much as dance because theyre both means to express himself thru (and i personally think he answered dance cuz he's "dancer" but fk do i know) and like from the moment limitless hit and he was put in a SOFT SWEATER and there were suddenly 9 people and johnny existed and carried them thru variety taeyong has significantly retreated more into the background and limitless is where he starts to FEEL his identity a little more and so he WRITES things like BDLI, he SAYS things like "i loved this line so much", because they're starting to move from their cool-but-not-quite-relatable, not quite touchable, exclusive and distant kind of music towards something more "true and free" which is at the core of the whole band's image (bUT LITERALLY!! WARM SWEATERS) and i cant say for sure it wouldve been this era when he relaxed his image a little more but this would be when i realized like "Ah this is just a regular kid who's good at some things" from the way members act around him and things they say and the things he does ofc its still genuine and he loves his members but its no longer "i go out of my way all the time to make sure everyone is ok" (like, like taeil johnny say he leads more by charisma and energy than by emotional care, more on this later) like he's just another person in the dorm, he's sensitive but also over sensitive he gets offended, he has disagreements w them, hes 20 something not a mother, hes just a kid who's talented and skilled and loves art and ofc i LOVED that and i wish i was fkcng around for this era but only in hindsight when CB era rolled around can i assume this is what linked the kid he was at debut with the MONSTER WE SEE NOW AND LIKE HERE COEMS CHERRY BOMB ERA WHICH IS MY FUCKING FAVE WHICH IS WHERE HE SAYS THINGS LIKE "I have an introverted personality but i think it makes me powerful; it helps me know myself better; it's like going through a "late-puberty"" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1LiUAqO1BA) AND THIS VIDEO KILLS ME EVERY FUCKING TIME BECAUSE YOU SEE IT............THE MOMENT HE GOT HIS PINK HAIR, THE MOMET HE GOT THOSE COLOR LENSES AND THE HEAVY EYE MAKEUP HE LITERALLY FINALLY WENT FROM NOT BEING ABLE TO LOOK AT HIMSELF IN THE MIRROR (https://www.instagram.com/p/BWzjNIEBj16/) TO LOOKING LIKE HE KNOWS EXACTLY HOW HOT HE IS LEADING THEIR TEAM AT THE CENTER OF THE FUCKING STAGE TO THE POINT WHERE HE TURNS HIMSELF ON (THAT CONFIDENCE!!!!!!!) TO WRITING THINGS LIKE WHIPLASH WHERE HE KNOWS HOW HOT IT IS THAT HE'S COME SO FAR AND BECOME SO CAPABLE (THE BEST OF THE BEST) AND HOW MUCH HOTTER IT IS THAT HE WANTS TO BE DOMMED, TO DOING WHAT ENDED MY LIFE TODAY IF THE MULTITUDE OF HALF-BONERS AND SEX FACES ON STAGE I NTHE PAST MONTH HASNT WHICH IS FLIRT ON NATIONAL TV (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HAyYCV1CnYc) AND CHECKING OUT A GIRL WITHOUT GIVING A SINGLE FUCK (https://twitter.com/moontaeyong95/status/921462333532200960/video/1) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA LIKE ???? where did we come from ???? and where are we now???? 1. "cool looking good leader dancer soft boy" 2. more ambiguous, more real, stays true to his own multifaceted personality and style 3. an absolute beast coming to realize his power for the first time going back to dance: from recent solo stages and the way he's been dancing the choreo (more expressive, less perfect and rigid) i get the feeling like he's always been less about motional perfection than just feeling the music so much that he goes crazy with it, and that's more or less what i fucking love about NCT as a whole, is that nobody really has clearly defined roles, no one ever introduces themselve as "hello I'm NCT's rapper xxx", "I'm NCT's dancer xxx", because theyre all just "artists" without these arbitrary limits, and they can indulge in this in whatever form they like, as whatever aspect of their identities they feel like being today: "hello, i'm mark in a pink sweater." (http://www.vlive.tv/video/19700?channelCode=DEE409) it's not that he loves dance more than anything, its not that he loves rap more than anything, he just....he just fucking lvoes life? he loves his life? taeyong's artistry comes from whatever it is he's feeling within and in whatever form he's feeling it and that's what ive come to rly love about him, it's about appreciating what HE's feeling and how he's showing it to us and lately he's been so, SO into the music. he's so into it that i couldnt believe it at first and thought it meant he was tired (https://youtu.be/sQO3TJfOf7M) but he's actually and i quote egg, "probably just really turned on". and chuseok passed and i thought he'd go home and take care of his ~needs~ and come back after learning how to CHILL but I GUESS APPARENYL FUCKING NOT BECAUSE HE'S GOD DAMN WALKING DOWN THE STAIRS TO SEOUL FASHION WEEK LIKE HE KNOWS HES THE HOTTEST FUCKIG N THING IN THE WORLD AND CHECKING OUT THAT GIRL WITH SO MUCH CONFIDENCE AND THIS IS THE ULTIMATE POINT OF THIS POST IS THAT IM SO FUCKING GLAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT HE LOOKS SO CONFIDENT LIKE HES FINALLY GROWN INTO HIMSELF AND ACCEPTED THE REALITY OF HIS POTENTIAL AND ALL THAT HE CAN BE AND IS FINALLY TAKING CHARGE OF IT AND SHAPING IT INTO SOMETHING OF HIS OWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LITERALLY CANT ASK FOR ANYTHING MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND ITS MORE ATTRACTIVE THAN ANYTHING HES DONE OS FAR AND IM LOSING MY G*D DAMN MIND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HES ON A RAMPAGE SM ARE YOU PAYING ATTENTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HOPE NOT CUZ I HOPE HE NEVER GETS STOPPED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that's it this whole thing has no other purpose i just wanted to say i love him right now like this thank you for reading

#nct #nct 127 #taeyong #lee taeyong

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