#i might as well not have bothered watching Joel's episode | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pedrito-friskito · 1 year

Text

strawberry wine - joel miller x ofc!liv stone/fem!reader

after - part twenty-five

series masterlist | main masterlist | read on ao3

you just have to keep going.

a/n: the big one. the biggest yet? I think? either way. this is pretty much the entirety of episode three in one part. I considered doing the rest of the story this way (one part per episode) but there's going to be a lot more added to the plot, so much more to come!

word count: 14.2k

warnings: if you've been reading this far, you know the drill, but explicit smut ahead!

✨@friskito-library for updates on new parts/works✨

You head west. Toward Lincoln. You walk for miles; maybe ten, if Joel had to guess. And the entire way, you don’t say a goddamn word. Not a single thing.

Ellie is uncharacteristically quiet the whole way, not a question or comment as you walk past the edge of the city, past what remains of the chain link fence you once told Joel was FEDRA’s original plan before the QZ was built. Ellie has your bat in her hands still, and she carries it silently, tapping her fingers against the metal softly, not hard enough to make any noise. You have Tess’s gun in hand, your grip on it so tight Joel is sure your knuckles are aching.

You walk through the forest until you’re all so tired you think you might drop. The night is cool, no rain to bother you, and you find a small clearing near the river to set up camp. Not that there’s much to set up. Ellie nearly collapses into the dirt, sprawling at the base of a tree, using her bag as a pillow. You go to shrug out of your jacket, stepping over and draping it over the kid. Joel follows suit, shrugging out of his own and putting it around your shoulders.

“Can’t risk a fire,” Joel murmurs to you, the two of you standing in the clearing. You ditched your bags once you found the spot, leaned them against a tree along with the bat, which Ellie had handed back to you, and the rifle. “Not this close to Boston.”

You just nodded in agreement, wrapping your arms around yourself. Joel rubs his hand up and down your back, and you turn to look at Ellie, completely passed out beneath Joel’s jacket. “What are we gonna do, Joel?” you whisper, your voice hoarse, and he can hear the panic in you. “What the fuck are we gonna do?”

“Exactly what we said we would. We go to Lincoln first. It’s a good hike, but we’ve done it before, we can do it again. We resupply, figure things out with Bill and Frank, and then…well, Tommy used to be a Firefly, maybe he can point us in the right direction.”

“We need to get to Lincoln as soon as we can,” you say, a slight waver in your voice, but you swallow it back. “We need to rest, to reset.”

To mourn.

It goes without saying, and Joel nods. He moves his hand to your shoulder, makes to pull you into his arms, but you move out of his grip instead of into it, turning to where your weapons are leaned against the tree. You pick up the rifle, and then head toward the edge of the trees surrounding you, toward where the river runs, the sound audible from where you’re standing.

“I’ll take the first watch,” you murmur over your shoulder, swinging the rifle up. “Get some rest.”

You never wake him. Sleep finds Joel easily, his body exhausted from the travel, but it’s the kind of sleep where he feels like he’s merely shut his eyes and opened them again, even though hours have passed. He closes his eyes on an inky black sky, and wakes to one filled with clouds, an almost lavender colour poking between the streaks of white.

The rifle is still missing from its previous spot beside your bat, and Joel knows gunfire would have woken him. But where are you? He gets to his feet slowly, every bone in his body aching with protest, leaning his good hand against a tree for a moment as he stretches out his back.

He walks over to where Ellie’s still passed out, and nudges her with his boot, just a light tap. She whines, hiding her face under his coat, and he taps her again. “Wake up, kid,” he grunts, rubbing his hand over his eyes. “Now.”

Following the sound of the river, Joel steps through the trees, bowing his head to watch his step until the water comes into view. Sure enough, there you are, sat right at the shoreline, your arms wrapped around your knees, which are pulled up to your chest. The rifle sits in the dirt beside you, and there’s a stack of rocks piled neatly, almost impossibly high.

“You didn’t wake me,” he calls, his voice hoarse with the morning. You jump, turn to look at him over your shoulder, and Joel’s heart squeezes at the tears on your face. “Liv, baby—”

“I didn’t see the point,” you reply, sniffling, wiping your cheeks with your sleeve. “I knew I wouldn’t sleep, figured one of us should get some good shuteye.”

Joel grimaces, squatting down beside you, looking out at the river. “Y’know, I always heard sleeping on the forest floor was good for your back. Load of shit.”

“Ellie awake?”

“I nudged her.”

You just nod.

“Liv,” he starts, and reaches his hand out.

“Don’t, Joel,” you grit out, nearly flinching away from him. “Just…if you touch me right now, I’ll start crying, and if I start crying now, I’m not gonna fucking stop.”

“Liv—”

“Don’t,” you repeat, your eyes brimming with tears as you stare back at him. “Please? Just…let’s just get to Lincoln, and figure out what we’re doing next.” You scramble to your feet, grabbing the rifle up off the ground. Joel follows suit, straightening his legs, and for a moment, he almost says fuck it and grabs you. But he doesn’t. He watches your eyes move up his body, landing on his face, and one lone tear slips down your cheek before you swipe at it. You hand him the rifle as you brush past, heading back up the bank to your camping spot.

He feels the loss differently than you do. He knows that. What he and Tess’s relationship had evolved into was vastly different than the closeness that had formed between you, but it didn’t mean he cared any less. She was Tess, steadfast and reliable, determined and headstrong. Just like you. How many times had he thought about that, before he made it back to Boston? How well he thought you and Tess would get along, the way the ferocity in each of you reminded him of the other.

And now, she’s gone. Just like that.

Joel waits a moment, looks out across the river, at the slowly rising sun, at the tower of rocks you’ve left on the shoreline. He bends down again, leaning some of his weight on the rifle, his knees creaking as he goes. He reaches into the water, hissing as the cold covers his hand. He closes his fingers around a smooth, flat stone and pulls it from the riverbed. It’s nearly a perfect circle, dark stone with a vein of white running through it.

Carefully, ignoring the way his hand trembles as he sets it down, he lays the stone atop your tower. He pauses, makes sure it stays upright, and then rises to his feet again, slinging the rifle over his shoulder and walking back to the clearing.

You’re still on your way back, and his boots find the footprints you’ve left in the mud, matching your steps as you walk ahead of him. You’re both silent as you walk back up the slight hill to the camp, finding Ellie fully awake, sitting against one of the tree trunks. Her bag sits beside her, and your jacket is now draped across her knees.

Wordlessly, you walk across to where your bags are set at the base of another tree. You pull Joel’s jacket off and hand it to him before stooping to your bag, yanking open the zipper, digging through the contents. “You want your jacket back?” Ellie calls to you, but you don’t answer, pulling out the little parcel of dried beef from your bag. You unfold the paper, take a small piece before handing it to Joel. He snaps off a bit, refolds the paper, and then tosses it to Ellie. It lands at her feet, and she shoots him a glare as she reaches for it, the paper rustling. “I’ve never been in the woods,” she continues as you re-zip the bag. “More bugs than I thought.”

You don’t say a word, but Joel’s close enough to hear your slow exhale.

“Look, I’ve been thinking about—” the kid starts.

“Don’t, kid,” Joel calls, lifting a hand.

“Listen to me for a second,” she shoots back, and Joel sees the way your back straightens, your shoulders pushed back. Defensive. “I was gonna say that I’ve been thinking about what happened. Nobody made any of you take me. Nobody made you go along with this plan. You needed a truck battery, or whatever, and you made a choice.” Her eyes flick from Joel’s to yours. “So don’t blame me for something that isn’t my fault.”

For a moment, the only noise around you is the river, bubbling in the distance. You brace your hands on your knees, slowly straightening, and Joel puts his hand on your back as you do, testing, seeing what your reaction might be. You surprise him by leaning into the touch, though he doesn’t miss the silvery line of tears along your lashes.

“She’s got a point,” you say, your voice still a bit hoarse as you turn to look at him. “We made a choice.”

It’s a loaded statement if Joel’s ever heard one. You made a choice. You both made a choice, all those years ago. Keep your secret safe, don’t let anyone — FEDRA, Fireflies, nobody — get their hands on you. Don’t let anyone take you from him. It’s the most selfish choice Joel’s ever made. He knows that. You both do.

But if you hadn’t, maybe Tess would still be alive.

Stubborn as he is, even he knows that’s not Ellie’s fault.

You made a choice, all of you.

“I’m sorry, kid,” you call, turning towards her. “It’s not your fault. It’s just…not what any of us bargained for.”

Joel snorts. “Ain’t that the truth.”

You both pick up your bags, you slide the bat between the straps, and Ellie gets to her feet, walking over to you with your coat outstretched towards you. You nod as you take it, pulling it on. “How much longer?” Ellie asks.

“Five-hour hike,” Joel answers when you glance at him.

“We can manage that.”

The weather holds up for your hike toward Lincoln. Joel leads, Ellie trails behind him, and you bring up the rear. You don’t miss the way Joel glances over his shoulder at you every once in a while, his gaze hard, and you just give him a slight nod each time.

Your head is a mess.

Tess knew. She knew almost the entire time, since Tommy fucked off to be a Firefly. That whole time, and she never said a goddamned thing.

Her final words echo through your mind, clear as a fucking bell.

It didn’t matter, Liv; it doesn’t matter. I knew Joel would never let them take you, no matter what it would fix, not if it wasn’t guaranteed, if it meant taking you from him. But now…this could be real. She’s real, Liv. The kid. She can fix it. Make up for all the bad shit we did.

These Fireflies out west, the ones looking for the cure, if they had more of you, would they have a better chance? Would the odds be better if they had two instead of one?

You shake the thought from your head as Joel looks back again, meeting your gaze. There’s a cut on his cheek, from your tussle in the museum yesterday, and you wish you had something to clean it with. You need to look at his hand again, too.

Take care of him, Liv.

You chew the inside of your cheek. You can let Ellie take your place, let her save the world, let her be the hero.

You can’t leave Joel.

The sun hides behind the clouds for the first leg of your journey, and once you’re out of the forest and on the open road, your trio falls into step with each other, Ellie in the middle of the two of you.

And fuck, does this kid ask a lot of questions.

“You’ve gone this way a lot?” she asks, the first thing anyone has said since you left the clearing. “No Infected?”

“We used it pretty regularly before,” Joel answers, but he doesn’t look at her as he says it, his head on a swivel, good hand tight around the rifle. “But recently, not so much.”

“What are you looking out for?”

“People.”

“Oh.”

She looks at you. “Are Bill and Frank nice?”

Before you can, Joel answers again. “Frank is.”

“Joel,” you chastise, shooting him a look. “They’re both nice. Frank is great, Bill is just more…practical.”

“Practical?” Ellie repeats, lifting a brow.

“Crazy, she means,” Joel quips, and you reach around Ellie, punching him in the arm. “Hey!”

The next question: “So are you two, like, married or something?”

“We are,” you nod.

“For how long?”

You pause, realizing you’re not totally sure, and Joel answers yet again. “Thirteen years.”

Jesus, has it been that long?

Ellie looks at him, then back at you. “So you met after the outbreak?”

That sends something like a shock down your spine, and you and Joel look at each other over Ellie’s head. “No,” you answer, and for a moment, it’s 2001, you’re standing in the middle of the hardware store, and Joel Miller is standing in front of you for the very first time, asking for a quarter-inch drill bit in that lovely drawl of his. It’s a good memory, a happy one, one that time cannot ruin. Despite it all, the corner of your mouth lifts. “No, we knew each other before.”

Her head snaps back to Joel. “You said you were from Austin.”

“I am,” he tells her, but his eyes are still on yours. “That’s where we met.”

“Wait, so how long have you known each other for?”

“That’s a long story, kid,” you say, shoving your hand through your hair.

“Yeah, and this is a long fuckin’ hike.”

“Some other time.”

“Please?”

“Ellie.”

“Please?”

“Enough,” Joel barks, but it’s halfhearted.

Ellie sulks for all of thirty seconds before something else piques her interest. “How’d you get that scar on your head?” she asks Joel, tilting her head to the side to get a better look at it.

It’s like fucking whiplash, going from a happy memory to a god-awful one. Your side prickles with it.

Joel sighs, but it just spurs Ellie’s questioning. “What? Is it something lame? Like you fell down the stairs or something?”

“I didn’t fall down any stairs.”

“Okay, so what then?”

You’re staring at your boots, watching each step you take, trying to swallow down the guilt that has crept up your throat. You can feel Joel look at you before he speaks. “Someone shot at me and missed.”

“See, that’s cool,” Ellie replies, waving her hand in the air. For a moment, you think you may vomit. “You shoot back?”

“Yeah.”

“You get him?”

You swallow hard, kicking a rock out of your path. “No,” Joel says after a beat, “I missed, too. It happens more often than you think. Clipped him in the ribs, I think.”

“Shoulder,” you correct, and suddenly Ellie’s attention is on you.

“You were there?” she asks, incredulous, and you just nod. “Why’d they both miss? They suck at shooting, or just like, in general?”

Joel shakes his head. “In general.”

Ellie goes quiet for a long moment, looking at Joel and then back at you, back and forth again. “Y’know, I still have that spare hand.”

You’re about to say it’s not a bad idea, Tess’s pistol in the pocket of your coat, but Joel beats you to the punch. “No.”

“Okay,” she nearly whines. “Jeez.”

After about an hour more of walking, Ellie only pouting slightly, and a familiar gas station comes into view. The place is untouched, the only thing that’s changed over the years is the slow creep of nature taking back the space, the trees encroaching closer in on either side.

“Cumberland Farms?” Ellie reads out, her head cocked to the side as Joel heads for the door. “What are we doing here?”

“Got some stuff stashed inside,” Joel answers, rifle swinging from his shoulder.

“Stashed?” Ellie repeats. “Why do you have stuff stashed here?”

“Just in case,” you tell her, stepping over a crack in the pavement as Joel pushes the door open. “Like Joel said, we used to take this path a lot.”

“To get to Bill and Frank’s?” she asks.

“You ask a lot of goddamned questions,” Joel grumbles, and Ellie just grins.

“Yes, I do.”

As you step inside, Joel glances your way. “Shoulda grabbed her bag,” he says, his brow knitting together, and you don’t need him to specify. “We split the food between you and her, didn’t we?”

You just nod, opening your mouth as Ellie shouts, “No way!” She’s grinning the widest you’ve yet to see, beelining across the gas station to a large arcade game tucked in the corner. The glass is shattered in one corner, the whole thing covered in a thick layer of dust. She’s immediately hitting the buttons, rattling the joysticks. “You ever play this one?”

You and Joel just look at each other.

“I had a friend who knew everything about this game,” Ellie continues, and you find yourself staring at her back while Joel kicks a piece of wood out of the way, searching for the stash box. “There’s this one character named Mileena who takes off her mask and she has monster teeth and then she swallows you whole and barfs out your bones! Oh, man.”

Behind you, Joel pushes a long-empty shelf across the floor, the metal squeaking. Ellie turns to look at you both, and you instantly look away, feeling caught.

Joel kicks at an empty can on the ground and Ellie rolls her eyes. “You forgot where you put your stuff.”

“No,” he quips, lifting his head. “I’m just…zeroing in on it. It’s been a couple years since we came in here.”

“Okay, well, I’m gonna take a look around, see if there’s anything good,” she replies, turning on her heel and heading towards the back of the gas station.

“Trust me,” you call out, “it’s all been picked over already. We cleared this place out back in the day.”

“Maybe, maybe not,” she replies, waving her hand in the air. Joel returns to his search, and Ellie turns back to you. “Is there anything bad in here?”

“Just you,” Joel calls back, and you smack his shoulder.

“Ah, getting funnier,” Ellie deadpans, and disappears through the doorway. A few moments pass, and you hear the scrape of metal.

“You okay in there?” Joel calls out, his brow crinkling.

“Yeah!” Ellie calls back, and he just shakes his head, pushing at the empty freezer in front of him.

“She’s a weird fuckin’ kid,” he grits, grunting as he shoves at the appliance. “So many goddamn questions.”

“If I was growing up in a time like this, I’d have a lot of goddamn questions too,” you reply, putting your hands on your hips, and Joel straightens with a sigh. “Where the fuck did we put that box?”

“I don’t know,” he replies, rubbing his fingers across his forehead. His hand drops, but a beat after it hits his thigh, he lifts it again, reaching for you. “Liv—”

You let him grab your hand, enough that his fingers thread through yours, knuckles locked together, but you shake your head. “Don’t, Joel. Please.”

“I just wanna—” I just wanna make sure you’re okay.

You’re not. It’s that fucking simple. But you can’t break down in the middle of the fucking gas station.

“I know you do,” you reply, squeezing his hand lightly. “Just…not here. Please.”

“Okay,” he grits out, and with a heavy breath, he lets go of his hand and reaches for his knife, kneeling down. “Let’s just find the box, then.”

You watch for a moment as he sweeps trash out of the way, a nearly white-knuckle grip on his knife. You want nothing more than to pull him up by the shoulder of his coat, haul him against you, bury your face in his chest. You want that warm, steady comfort he’s trying so hard to give to you, the thump of his heart against your ear and his arms tight around you.

It’s okay, baby. It’s gonna be okay.

But is it?

You crouch down to help with the search, rapping your knuckles against the cracked tiles, sweeping the debris out of the way first so you don’t cut yourself. You can feel Joel watching for a moment, but when you go to glance back at him, his eyes dart away.

Finally, you find a tile that sounds different than the others. “Joel,” you call holding your hand out for the knife, closing your fingers around the hilt. The blade hits the metal box with a satisfying clink when you jam it through the tile, and you use the blade to pry it up. “Jackpot.”

There’s a little bag filled with medical supplies in the box, and you reach for that first. Then you hand Joel the box of ammunition. He starts picking through it, fishing out the bullets that’ll fit his pistol, when he realizes there hasn’t been a sound from the direction Ellie disappeared in.

He hands you back the box, and curls his hand around the rifle, taking a step towards the door she went through. “Ellie?” he calls, lifting his hand in your direction, making you pause your movements. He can’t ignore the way his stomach drops. You call his name slightly, and he walks towards the door, calling louder now. “Ellie!”

“Picked over my ass,” she declares, appearing from the darkened doorway. She’s got a box of tampons in her hand, a smug smile on her face, and when Joel turns back, he sees you pop up from the floor, your jaw dropping when you see what she’s found.

“No fucking way.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll share,” Ellie says, unzipping her bag and stuffing the box inside. “Least I can do.”

Joel returns to where you’re standing over the box. Sufficiently resupplied, Joel closes the box, fitting it back into the space it had been hidden, and, his dig through the box of ammunition proving fruitless for the larger gun, sliding the rifle in beside it. He can feel the kid watching him, and when he glances up, there’s something close to concern in her eyes.

“What are you doing?”

“There’s not much ammo out there for this thing,” he tells her, reaching for the tile you’d yanked up and fitting it back into place. “Makes it mostly useless.”

“Well, if you’re just gonna leave it there,” Ellie says, waving her hand at where the gun is now hidden.

Joel shoots to his feet, hearing you huff out your breath as he tells her firmly again, “No.”

He grabs his bag from where it’s laying on the ground, slings it over his shoulder. “C’mon,” you say to Ellie, reaching for your own bag. “Still a ways to go.”

It’s warmer, when you step back out of the gas station, leaving Cumberland Farms behind as you head back towards the road. Warm enough that Joel shrugs out of his jacket, stuffing it through the strap of his bag. It’s not long before you and Ellie follow suit, Ellie tying hers around her waist. After a bit of walking, Joel feels you move up toward his right, sensing your presence more than hearing your steps.

You put your hand in his, your fingers tightly wound together. He chances a glance in your direction, just a quick one, seeing the firm set to your jaw, your eyes trained on the path before you. He’s surprised enough at your touch. You’d allowed him the same back at the gas station, but only long enough to tell him not to push it further, not to give you the comfort that was trying to claw its way out of him like some kind of rabid animal.

He just wanted to make you feel okay. He knows good is a stretch, knows it’s a hard sell when he doesn’t have his bare body pressed to yours, every ache and pain soothed away by the way you writhe beneath him, feeling the same.

Joel catches himself, reaching down with his free hand to adjust the waist of his jeans. Not the fuckin’ time. Or place. He’s starting to wish he’d made more of it, when he’d woke you early a few days ago, before the sun was up, before either of you had to even think about getting out of bed. He’d moved over you slowly, woke you with soft kisses along your jaw, gentle until your eyes fluttered and you made a little noise, roused by his touches.

He should have kissed you longer, should have let his mouth trail lower than just your chest. He’d lifted the hem of your t-shirt, teeth scraping at the sensitive flesh of your breast, but he should have roved lower. He should have tasted you at the source, lapped at you until your legs were shaking around his ears, until he could slide into you with little resistance, the only place that’s truly felt like home to him.

Coughing, tugging at his jeans again, he squeezes your fingers, lifts your joined hands until he can press his lips to your knuckles. Behind you, Ellie makes a gagging noise. “You guys are kinda gross,” she says, and when you both turn your heads back to look at her, she’s got a funny grin on her lips. “But like, in a cute way.”

“Gee, thanks,” Joel deadpans, and beside him, you actually giggle.

“So will you tell me now how you guys—” Ellie starts to ask, but cuts herself off, coming to a stop as you reach a break in the trees lining the road. “Holy shit.”

Off in the distance, sprawled atop a large hill, is a plane. Or, what remains of one. The pieces are long decayed, the rusted-out metal visible even from where you’re standing.

Ellie whistles out her awe. “You fly in one of those?”

“A few times, sure,” Joel answers. your fingers flexing in his grip.

“So lucky.”

“Didn’t feel like it at the time,” he tells her. “Get shoved into a middle seat, pay twelve bucks for a sandwich.”

“Dude, you got to go up in the sky,” the kid emphasizes, and you stifle your laugh.

He’s begrudgingly grateful, for this weird kid, that she distracts you enough from what’s happened to make you laugh.

“So did they,” you mumble, looking away from the scene before you.

“Oof,” Ellie fake-winces, squinting at you. “Grim.”

The three of you continue down the path for a little while longer, and just when he’s starting to think he’ll have peace and quiet the rest of the way to Lincoln, the kid pipes up with more questions. She seems to notice his reluctance to answer, however, because she moves around to your side, interrogating you instead of Joel.

“So, everything came crashing down in one day?”

“Basically.”

“But how? No one was infected with cordyceps, everybody’s fine, eating in restaurants and flying in planes. And then all at once, it was over? How did it even start? If you have to get bit to be infected, then who bit the first person? Was it a monkey? I bet it was a monkey.”

You chuckle again, shaking your head. “They don’t teach you this in FEDRA school?”

She blows a raspberry. “Yeah, they don’t teach us how their shitty government failed to prevent a pandemic.”

You’re quiet for a moment before you start giving her the spiel. “No one really knows where it started, or really how, but the best guess is that cordyceps mutated. It got into the food supply, some kind of basic ingredient like flour, something that was in basically everything. And certain brands of food were sold all across the country, all over the world even. Bread, cereal, pancake mix, that sort of thing.”

At the words pancake mix, Joel grips your hand tighter. You don’t flinch, squeezing back.

“They figure, if you eat enough of it, then it’ll get you infected. So all this tainted food hits the store shelves around the same time Thursday, people bought it, ate it that night, or the next morning, and the day went on. People started getting sick, started turning, and by the evening, it was worse. They started biting, started attacking people.”

“Were you attacked?”

You go quiet, but from the corner of his eye, Joel sees you nod. “My boyfriend at the time, Dean. I was out celebrating my birthday, and I came home and found him, just standing there. Then he started twitching, then he lunged at me. Gave me this.” Joel turns just in time to see you pulling back the strap of your bag and the collar of your flannel, letting Ellie see the scars on your shoulder, the jagged lines Dean had left in your skin.

“Shit,” the kid curses. “That’s intense. You killed him?”

Another nod. “With my bat.”

Ellie’s jaw drops. “That’s…pretty badass, actually.”

You bark a laugh. “Thanks, kid.”

“Wait,” she says, lifting a hand. “It was your birthday?”

“Yep,” you answer, nodding again. “Joel’s too.”

“No shit.”

“Shit. Friday, September 26th, 2003. My twenty-fifth birthday. By Monday, everything was gone, and they started dropping bombs not long after that.”

Ellie finally settles into silence for a moment before she says, “It makes more sense than monkeys. Thanks, Liv.”

“You’re welcome, kid.”

He’s been distracted as you’ve walked, listening to the sound of your voice, trying to catch any dip or crack that might give him space to swoop in, take over, make you feel safe again. Even if he doesn’t really want to answer the kid’s incessant questions, he can do it for you, if he has to. But you haven’t wavered, and Joel feels that begrudging gratitude take up a more permanent residence in his chest. At least, while the kid is still around.

And then he realizes where you are.

“Wait,” he calls out, and both of you stop in your tracks, you holding your arm out to stop Ellie from taking another step. “We’ll cut across the woods here.”

“Isn’t the road easier?” Ellie asks, glancing between the both of you. Joel sees the realization on your face, and you sigh.

“Yeah, it is, it’s just…” You trail off, clearly not quite sure what to tell the kid.

Joel finds the words before you do. “There’s stuff up there you shouldn’t see.”

She grins. “Well, now I have to see it.” And with that, she ducks under your raised arm, continuing on down the path.

“Yeah, but I don’t want you to,” Joel grits out, and pulls you to step after him, following her. “I’m serious, Ellie.”

She tilts her head back, calling back to the both of you. “Can it hurt me?”

“No,” Joel calls back, hearing you sigh after.

“Not in the way you’re thinking of,” you say, rubbing at your brow. “Ellie, wait, just—”

“You guys worry too much,” she calls, picking up her pace a bit. “Besides, if you really wanted to stop me, you should have said axe murderer.”

You heave a sigh as she continues on, almost at the spot you didn’t want her to be. Joel’s spine tingles as you come up to the bend in the road. He still remembers the first time you found this spot, the first time you had gone to Bill and Frank’s.

“Uh, whatever it is,” Ellie yells back to you, “I think it’s gone.” But then her steps slow, her attention dragged off the side of the road, and Joel’s fingers squeeze around yours.

As you come up behind her, stopping when she turns to look at you, Joel answers the question before she even asks. You were the one to tell him the story, and after just rehashing your own experience on the day of the outbreak — and saving him from telling his own, he realizes — he can tell the kid this.

“About a week after Outbreak Day, soldiers…”

He trails off for a moment. It’s hard not to imagine Cowan’s face as his eyes are pulled towards the ground. You had been adamant that Nick hadn’t been a part of it, but Joel had never felt like the soldier was telling you the entire truth. That, and a bullet to the head, and Joel is more than a little biased, but…

He sighs, continuing. “They went through the countryside and evacuated the small towns. Told you you were goin’ to a QZ, and you were, if there was room. If there wasn’t…”

The words trail off again, and his eyes can’t pull away from the bones in the dirt, the few scraps of clothing still tethered in the earth.

“These people weren’t sick?” Ellie asks, her voice snapping on the words.

“Most likely no,” you answer, and Joel feels your body turn against his, both of your hands now wrapped around his.

“Then why kill them? Why not just leave ‘em be?”

“Better dead than infected,” you reply. “At least, that’s the way FEDRA saw it.” You turn your face away from the body pit. You reach out and tug on the handle of Ellie’s backpack. “C’mon. We should get going. Almost there.”

You’re more and more nervous, with every step you take.

Joel notices, gripping your hand a little tighter. You haven’t let go for hours at this point, and your palm is sweaty against his, but he doesn’t seem to care, and neither do you. Depending on what you find beyond the gate, you know he’ll be the only thing to keep you upright.

What if they’re dead? What if they’re dying?

You can’t decide what option is better. Which is worse.

As you round that final corner, the gate Bill built around the small town coming into view, your breath catches in your throat. Nature hasn’t let up anywhere, but when you were still visiting, Bill and Frank had always kept everything trimmed back — Bill more than Frank, but you knew the latter had a penchant for instructing the former what needed attention.

But now, plants crawl across the top of the fence, wrapping through the wires. Long-dead, thanks to the electrical current, but left in place, unbothered by the inhabitants of Lincoln. Your mind spins. It could be that Bill just couldn’t be bothered with it anymore, that his old knees couldn’t take the hike up the ladder. Maybe he’s got a laundry list of things for Joel to do now that you’ve come back.

The hum of the fence is familiar as you approach, the DANGER: HIGH VOLTAGE sign split in half, whether by the decay of time or by something else, you can’t be sure.

Joel squeezes your fingers before letting go, murmuring to you and Ellie to stay in place as he walks up to the gate, reaching out a cautious hand to enter the code. Bill told you long ago what it was — 37265, F-R-A-N-K — in case you ever needed to come in when they couldn’t let you in. The man really had thought of everything.

Your shoulders sag with relief when the fence beeps open, Joel pushing the gate inward to let you all inside. Something inside you snaps, and the moment you’re through the gate, you’re off like a shot, striding with purpose toward the old house. All around you, Lincoln shows signs of abandonment, overgrown grass, leaves littering the sidewalks and streets. One of the fence gates at another house bangs against its latch in the wind.

Behind you, you hear Joel call your name, his boots picking up the pace to match yours, but he doesn’t catch up until you’re standing in front of Bill and Frank’s home. It looks less unkempt than the rest, but the flowers on either side of the low front gate are wilted, the steps nearly brown, petals covering the ground beneath. It’s not promising.

Joel catches your arm. “Let me go in first,” he tells you, his voice low, but you shake your head, shake off his grip, and stride up the walkway to the porch.

The door’s unlocked. It creaks open when you push it inward, the sunlight streaming through the doorway. Joel steps up behind you, Ellie behind him, and you step inside slowly, through the small foyer, stopping at the base of the stairs.

It’s quiet. Too quiet.

Joel turns toward the dining room and you toward the living room. The air feels thick with dust, the complete opposite of the homeliness you’re used to feeling the moment you walk through that door.

“What the fuck?” Ellie murmurs.

It’s only a beat after that Joel calls, “Bill?”

You step into the living room, seeing Frank’s half-done painting on the easel, the beginnings of Bill’s likeness looking back at you. “Frank?”

Nothing but quiet.

Your stomach twists, and you can feel Ellie looking at you. There’s a streak of concern in her eyes, and you lift your hand in her direction. You pull out your gun, and Joel follows suit. “Stay there, okay? If you hear anything, if you see anything, yell for one of us.” She doesn’t say anything at first, and you prompt her. “Clear?”

“Clear,” she repeats, nodding. But then her voice drops. “What if they’re gone?”

Then it’s just one more nail in my coffin, kid. That’s what you want to say. Instead, you say nothing, turning on your heel and striding towards the back of the living room. There’s a thin layer of dust on everything, every surface you look at. Distantly, you hear Ellie tap at the piano keys, and it sends a chill down your spine.

The living room leads you back and around to the kitchen, and you find Joel there, looking through the back door, the small greenhouse and the garden beyond it. It’s not as overgrown as the rest, but most of the garden is dead, threads of ivy climbing up the glass of the greenhouse.

“Anything?” you ask, willing your voice not to crack on the question.

He shakes his head.

Joel follows you out of the kitchen, into the hallway that runs the length of the stairs. There’s a bedroom on the lower level; when the stairs got too much for Frank, they moved downstairs. You lift your hand and knock on the door, the sound echoing on the other side.

Nothing.

Joel’s hand lands on your shoulder and your hand drops to the handle. Unlike the front door, it doesn’t give when you twist the knob. “Liv,” Joel says quietly, his fingers digging into your shoulder slightly. “Baby.”

The front door slams shut all of a sudden, moved by the wind, and you both flinch.

It goes without saying, now.

They’re gone.

You both look back to the front door, Ellie nowhere in sight, and despite the heartbreak that’s sweeping through you like a tidal wave, your instincts kick into gear, and you step out of Joel’s grip, calling the kid’s name as you make your way to the door. “Ellie!”

“In here,” she calls as you step into the foyer, and your head turns in the direction of her voice, finding her sitting in one of the dining room chairs. You hadn’t noticed before, but there are two plates set at the end of the table, the remnants of food on them long moulded over, flies buzzing around. Twin wine glasses stand between the plates, and there’s a small empty baggie on the table.

They’re gone.

Your attention turns back to Ellie, you force it there, seeing the folded piece of paper in her hands. Joel’s steps creak as he comes up beside you, reaching for your hand as Ellie says, “It’s from Bill.” You both put your guns away. There’s no need. Ellie reaches for the torn envelope on the table. “To whomever, but probably Joel. I figured I fell under ‘whomever’. There’s this, too.”

She picks up another envelope, this one unopened, and extends it toward you. Along with it, a car key.

“It only has your name on it. And the key was in this one.”

You both drop your bags, you lean the bat against the wall. Joel takes the key, and you take the second envelope. Your hands are shaking as you do.

“So they’re…?” you trail off, unable to say the words as Ellie looks back at Bill’s note. Dead. She gives a tiny affirmative noise. You inhale sharply, your fingers crinkling the envelope, and Joel reaches for your free hand. She extends the paper towards Joel, but he shakes his head.

“You read it.”

You don’t know if you can handle this. But you have to.

Ellie clears her throat, and starts to read.

August 29th, 2023.

If you find this, please do not come into the bedroom. We left a window open so the house wouldn’t smell, but it will probably be a sight.

I’m guessing you found this, Joel, because anyone else would’ve been electrocuted or blown up by one of my traps. Hehehehehehehehehehehehe.

Take anything you need. The bunker code is the same as the gate code but in reverse.

Anyway, I never liked you. But still, it’s like we’re friends almost. And I respect you. I respect the love you have for that girl. You’ve done right by her, and I know you’ll keep doing it. So I’m gonna tell you something because you’re probably the only person who will understand.

I used to hate the world, and I was happy when everyone died. But I was wrong, because there was one person worth saving. That’s what I did. I saved him. Then I protected him. That’s why men like you and me are here. We have a job to do. And God help any motherfuckers who stand in our way.

I leave you all of my weapons and equipment. The truck is in the garage, and there are guns in the bunker. Use them to keep Olivia and Tess safe, until such time you decide you’ve had enough. At that point, I recommend pairing 40 Vicodins with a nice Brunello.

Good luck, Joel. You’re gonna need it.

Bill

There are tears on your face, sliding down your cheeks unbidden, and Joel feels his own emotions crawl up the back of his throat.

Wordlessly, you tear into the envelope in your hand, pulling out the folded paper within. The note is shorter than Bill’s, the handwriting scratchier, letters falling off the pages in some places. Joel can only watch as your eyes scan over the words, again and again and again. The tears come harder. He wants to reach for you — he needs to reach for you — but before he can get a grip, you slap the paper again his chest and turn on your heel, bolting out the front door.

My sweet Liv,

This letter will not be as long as I would like. My hands are not cooperating lately, and I’m sure I’ll have to come back and finish this more than once. It’s okay. I’m old. This is just the way things are.

I hope you find this, someday. I could be writing to no one now. It’s been a while since we heard from you, since we were able to speak, and god, I miss you, Liv. I wish you and Joel and Tess had come when you had the chance. I wish we could have stayed closer, lived together.

But I can’t waste my time on what could have been. I know what you find here will hurt, and for that, I’m sorry. But you have to know, I had a good life. Were there bad days? Of course. The world ended, after all, and yet I still managed to make the most of it.

Take care of Joel. Promise me that you won’t ever stop paying attention, that you’ll keep showing him you love him. He’d move heaven and earth for you, and I know you’d do the same for him.

It might not feel like it now, but things will be okay, Liv. I promise.

All my love,

Frank x

“Stay here,” Joel tells Ellie. He doesn’t wait to see if she nods, he’s already out the door, Frank’s note crumpled in his hand. He steps out onto the porch, onto the walkway, and that’s when he sees you, on your knees in the grass, nearly crumpled forward.

He calls your name, but you don’t seem to notice. Even as he runs for you, moving in front of you, dropping to his knees, taking your face in his hands, you barely flinch. Your face is soaked with tears, your eyes squeezed shut, hands clawing at your shirt, pulling at the material. “I-I can’t—” you choke out, and you slump forward when he grabs your wrists, tugging your arms around his shoulders.

Your face pressed into his chest, he feels his shirt cling to his skin in an instant, wet with your tears. He fits his arms under yours, keeping you upright, keeping you against him.

“Liv, baby,” he murmurs, his cheek pressed to your temple. “Baby, you gotta talk to me. Let me help you.”

“Tess knew,” you blubber out, lifting your head so fast you nearly knock Joel in the chin. Your eyes are bloodshot, your lashes clumped together. “Tommy told her before he left with the Fireflies. She knew the whole goddamn time what I am, Joel, and she never said a damn thing. And if I hadn’t been so fucking selfish all these years, she could still be alive!”

Joel shakes his head, lifting his hand until he can cup your cheek in his palm. “No, baby, that’s not what—”

“Yes, it is! If I’d given myself over when it first happened, everything could be different now! This all could be over. It—”

“Or you could be dead!” Joel snaps, and he has both hands on your face now, forcing you to look at him. “They could have killed you for it, or what if it didn’t work? What if nothing changed? We made a choice, Liv. Tess made a choice. Bill and Frank, they—” He cuts himself off, dropping his chin to his chest. The sob you let out rattles his ribs. “We made choices, baby. Choices to stay alive, to stay together.”

Your eyes slip shut again and you nod between his hands, but another sob falls from your lips, your hands moving down to fist in the front of his jacket. “It hurts, Joel. It hurts so fucking bad and I can’t breathe and it just hurts and I—”

“I know, baby,” he murmurs, and pulls you close again, his mouth at the crown of your head. He puts his arms back around you, one around your middle, one across your shoulders. Slowly, he rocks you side to side, humming against your hair. “I know it hurts. It’ll pass, I promise you. You gotta give it time, you hear me? You’ll be okay.” He pauses, inhales sharply when you whimper. “We’ll be okay.”

He’s not sure how much time passes, the two of you kneeling there in the grass, but his joints start to protest after a while. Your sobs subside, your breathing levelling out to an almost normal pace. You don’t let go of him, your hands still locked in his jacket. But your head tilts back against his chest, until his mouth is resting on your forehead.

“What are we gonna do, Joel?”

He rubs his hand across your shoulders. He’ll hold you as long as he has to, to make you feel safe, make you feel okay. It’s just as much for you as it is for him. “We stock up, take what we can. We go find Tommy. That was always the plan, anyway.”

“What about the kid?”

“Tommy might know someone, somewhere we can take her. If not, we find a way to radio Marlene, find a new place to meet, something. We’ll figure it out. Always do.”

Your eyes slip shut again, your arms lowering slightly so you can sling them around his waist. Your face fits into the curve of his neck, and he squeezes you softly.

“I promise you, baby,” he murmurs to you, lips grazing whatever part of your face he can reach. “We’ll be okay. I’ll keep you safe.”

“And I’ll keep you safe.”

Slowly but surely, you both get to your feet, and while you start in the direction of the front door, the double-door garage to the side of the house catches Joel’s attention. When you lift a brow, he pulls the car key from his pocket, and you follow his lead, walking towards the garage. You pull one of the doors open, and Joel steps inside, looking for a light switch. Fluorescents buzz in their sockets above the covered truck, and you both tug on a corner of the tarp, revealing the blue-and-white painted Chevy.

Joel pops the hood first, to see what he’s working with, and everything in him deflates when he sees what’s missing. He lets the hood slam shut, braces his hands on top of it. “What is it?” you ask, busying yourself with shoving the tarp into a corner of the garage.

“No fuckin’ battery,” he grits out, and your face pinches.

“There’s gotta be something around here,” you say, walking around the truck. “This thing’s in decent shape, and there’s no way Bill would have left it to us without it—”

His attention is caught over your shoulder, an old fridge pushed against the wall, stacked with bottles of different cleaning solutions. He steps around the truck, around you, and yanks the fridge open. Sure enough, everything he needs to make a battery is inside.

Joel can’t stop himself from smiling. Fuckin’ Bill. Really did think of everything.

You step up behind him, peering over his shoulder and into the fridge. “You know what you’re doing there, baby?”

“I do, actually,” he says, starting to pull the ingredients out of the fridge, a jar of sulphur, the plastic pieces of the battery itself. “Had a friend back in Austin that showed me how to do this.”

It doesn’t take him long. You hover at his shoulder the entire time, watching him work, asking the odd question, your brow furrowing as he connects the battery to the charger. You’re committing the steps to memory, Joel realizes as he finishes up, as you recite everything he just did back to him. He can see it for what it is — a distraction — but he nods along anyway, corrects you when you mix up the second and third steps.

You start over, counting the steps off on your fingers as you try again, and Joel turns to you, takes a step towards you, which has you stepping back once, then again, until your back is pressed to the truck.

“Liv, let me kiss you,” he murmurs, reaching up and bracing his hands on either side of you, fingers curling against the roof of the truck. He has to; he needs to. The desperation bubbles to his surface, lurking just beneath his skin. You’re the only one he can be like this with, the only one who can see through that hard mask he’s been wearing since you left the QZ. His emotions are getting the better of him — grief, pain, desperation, fear. He feels them all.

But he just really wants to feel you.

“Please,” he begs, and a beat later, your fingers hook into his belt loops, tugging him against you, one of your legs sliding between his. He bends his elbows, hearing the truck creak slightly as he pushes his weight against it, against you.

Slowly, your chin lifts, drops. A nod. Yes.

Your lips taste like salt. It makes him groan. Tilting his head to the side so he can kiss you deeper, one hand coming off the truck to bury in your hair, fingers twining in the strands. He feels you melt, slightly, a chip in the shell that has formed around you in your grief.

He feels the same, feels like everything that’s wrong, everything that makes him hurt, is gone, the moment his lips find yours. It feels heightened, the weight of the last few days nearly making his knees buckle, the loss of Tess, the revelation of Bill and Frank. It feels like too much, but for just a moment, he can forget.

You moan when he flicks his tongue against the seam of your lips, asking. Your hands move up, unhooked from his belt to slide beneath his shirt, the flannel bunching over your wrists as you slide your palms over his stomach, glancing across the scar on his hip. Your fingers flatten against his ribs, and he tugs on your hair lightly, tilting your head back, groaning when you sink your teeth into his lower lip.

Joel pushes forward again, until his hips are nearly flush with yours. Your thigh tightens between his legs, rubbing against the seam of his jeans, and the feeling makes him choke, mouth tilted away from yours as his breath hitches, suddenly feeling like a touch-starved teenager. “Joel,” you whisper, one hand skirting around to rest against his spine, the other moving down to his belt buckle. Your fingers curl behind the metal, knuckles scraping his lower stomach. “We should—”

He cuts you off with another kiss, wanting to taste you more, lick the salt from your lips. You let him, tugging on his belt, moaning when he drops his hand from your hair and lets it rest at the base of your throat. Joel drags his mouth along your jaw, nipping at the space below your ear, where your skin is thin, and he can feel the thump of your heartbeat against his lips.

“Joel,” you grit out, leaning your head back until it’s resting against the truck. It gives him better access to your neck, lets him lick a strip up your throat. “The kid—”

“—can’t hear us,” he finishes for you, the words mumbled into your skin. “I wanna—”

“We’ve been out here a while,” you cut him off, and Joel sighs, moving his hand from your collar, replacing it with his forehead. He braces his hands on the truck again, but you give yourself away, pushing your thigh slightly against the bulge in his jeans once more. “She’s gonna think we ditched her.”

“She can wait one more minute.”

“Joel.”

He sighs, but relents, leaving one last kiss on your lips before he tugs on your hand and pulls you out of the garage and back towards the house.

You find Ellie in the same place you’d left her, sitting in the chair at the dining room table. When you and Joel step through the doorway, her head shoots up, dark eyes moving between you both.

You’d nearly frozen on the porch, the weight resettling. Joel had done his best to chase it away — in fact, your lips still tingled with his efforts, a shot of heat between your legs you’re doing your best to ignore for the time being — but the moment you stepped through the front door, it had spiked again. The plates at the end of the table, the empty wine glasses, they didn’t help matters.

“Is everything okay?” Ellie asks, her voice low as she gets to her feet. “Do you have a plan?”

“Joel just made a battery for the truck Bill left,” you answer. “It’s charging right now.”

“Okay.”

“I have a brother out in Wyoming,” Joel says, and you glance at him, squeeze your fingers around his. “He’s in some kind of trouble and we’re heading out there to find him. He used to be a Firefly, and my guess is, he knows where some of ‘em are out there. Maybe they can get you to wherever this lab is.”

“All right,” Ellie nods, her eyes still darting between you and Joel. Then they drop to her hands. “Listen, you guys, about Tess, and Bill and Fr—”

You lift your hand, cutting her off. “I need you to listen to me, Ellie. If we’re taking you with us, there are ground rules.”

“Okay.”

“Number one, you don’t talk about what happened to Tess. We don’t talk about what happened to Tess. You understand?”

“Yes.”

“Two, you don’t tell anyone about what happened to you. If anyone sees that bite mark, they’re not gonna think twice. They’ll just shoot you, and there won’t be a damn thing either of us can do to stop it. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“And three, if Joel or I tell you do to something, you do it. No questions asked. You do what we say, when we say it. Are we clear?”

“Yes.”

“Repeat it.”

“What you say goes.”

Joel’s fingers twitch against yours, and you share a look, something in you deflating as you sigh. “Okay,” he murmurs, nodding to you.

“So, what now?” Ellie asks.

“We stock up,” you say, repeating what Joel had said to you earlier. You glance at him. “How long will the battery take?”

“Couple hours,” he replies, and lifts his hand, moving it to the back of your neck. “Enough time to rest for a bit. Find some food maybe. I wanna know what’s in that bunker.”

“You and me both.”

It was the one place Bill never let you see. It was his boundary, and you respected it. But you couldn’t lie; the curiosity was getting the better of you. The three of you make your way down to the basement, Joel pulling up the set of drawers that makes up most of the ladder. There’s a grate over the opening, a keypad embedded into the floor, and Joel crouches down, enters the code. It slides open a second later, and he heads down first, you following, Ellie after you.

“Ho-ly shit,” the kid mutters, as Joel flicks on the lights, illuminating the wall of guns, the shelves of first aid and cans of food. She bee-lines for the weapons, and you move towards the stack of security screens, the computer that played your coded songs over the radio. “This guy was a genius.”

“That he was, kid,” you agree, tapping at the keyboard. Joel moves behind you, puts a soft hand on your back. “That he was.”

“Why was the music on?”

“If Bill didn’t reset the countdown every few weeks, then this playlist would run over the radio and we’d hear it back in Boston.”

Ellie leans over the desk, peering at the screen. “Eighties.”

You tilt your head to the side. How does she know what the code was? You turn to Joel, who just grits his teeth, pointing toward the shelves lined with food at the back of the bunker. “Grab some cans from over there,” he tells her. “Nothin’ dented or swollen.”

She nods, going to do as he asks, but pauses at the wall of guns again. “Can I—?”

“No,” Joel says instantly. Ellie’s eyes slide to you for a second, but you say nothing.

“There’s a wall of them.”

Joel glares at her, and puts her hands up in surrender. As soon as she’s across the room, you turn to him. “How did she know about the code?”

“Back in Boston,” he tells you, a slight flare in his cheeks. “She found the songbook, asked me what the code was, what eighties meant. I didn’t wanna tell her, but she figured it out on her own. Said she heard a fuckin’ Wham! song while I was asleep. I panicked.”

You can’t help your grin. “Smart kid.”

The rest of the afternoon finds you searching the house. You steer clear of the closed bedroom at the end of the hall, and Ellie follows you around like a puppy, letting you take the lead as you look through cupboards and closets.

Rolls of toilet paper, cans of soup and veggies and the like, paper towels, first aid supplies, camping gear. You stack everything near the front door, piling it into bags Joel finds in the garage.

Bill must have emptied out the boutique since you were last here, because Joel unearths boxes of clothes in one of the upstairs closets, finding a few boxes filled with ammunition in the process. You and Ellie pick through them while Joel goes hunting for more bullets, pulling out t-shirts and sweaters. You both reach for the same red t-shirt and Ellie freezes, her brows shooting into her hair. You concede, pushing the shirt towards her. “You take it, kid.”

“Thanks,” she mumbles, staring down at the fabric. “Liv, can I ask you something? It’s not about Tess, I promise.”

You reach for another shirt, inspecting it for a second before tossing it aside. Not your size, or your style. “Shoot.”

“How did you find Bill and Frank?”

The question settles over you like a blanket. It’s a harmless question, warranted even, and you can’t fault Ellie for her curiosity, especially after your reaction to their letters. She’s owed some answers.

But your moment of hesitation must show on your face, because she’s instantly backtracking. “I-I’m sorry, you don’t have to tell me. I’m just—”

“No, it’s okay, kid,” you say, picking up a patterned fleece sweater. “Really.” She actually smiles, and you return it. “You ever heard of Fleetwood Mac?”

You tell her the whole story, how you found Frank on the radio, your first meeting, the trading you kept up over the years.

The friendship you held so close to your heart.

“Were you always a smuggler?” she asks, having taken a seat at the edge of the bed. You moved on to another box, men’s clothes, trying to find something for Joel.

“Pretty much,” you answer, pulling out a green plaid shirt that looks oddly familiar. “Well, I wasn’t before the outbreak, but after everything went to shit, it was kind of my only option.”

“What about before the outbreak?”

“I worked in an office. Sat at a desk all day, it was kinda boring, to be honest.”

“Is that where you met Joel?” You shoot her a look, your brow raising slowly. She’s full-on grinning now. “You said it was a long story, and you said I could ask you something.”

“You already asked me something. Many somethings.”

“C’mon,” she groans, flopping back on the bed. “Please?”

You blow out a breath. “Fine. Joel and I met…” You trail off, squinting. “Twenty-two years ago, in a hardware store in Austin.”

“A hardware store?”

You nod, unable to stop yourself from smiling at the memory. “My grandparents owned one in Texas, and when they died, my parents took over. I had just finished college, and I was home for the summer, so I helped my dad out around the store. Joel came in one day and that was how we met.”

“And you’ve been together ever since.”

Your head drops, eyes downcast. “Not exactly.”

Ellie rolls onto her stomach, ducking her head so she can catch your eye. “Would you just tell me already?”

“The office job was in Boston,” you tell her, and her face pinches with confusion. “I left at the end of the summer, and we tried to make it work, but the distance sucked.”

She’s got her fingers locked together, bouncing her knuckles off her lip. “So you broke up.”

“We did,” you say with a nod, finding another shirt for Joel, a blue button-up not unlike the one he’s currently wearing, just a few shades darker. “I’d been in Boston just over two years when the outbreak happened. Dean attacked me, like I told you, and he was the first Infected I killed. Then the bombings. Then FEDRA started rounding up any survivors they could find, and we were holed up in the mall for a while, but then people started turning, so they moved us.” You sigh, flipping the box closed. “Next thing we knew, the QZ walls were up, and FEDRA took over.”

“But, Joel…?” She trails off, her confusion deeper.

The corner of your mouth quirks. “Five years after the walls went up, Joel’s brother showed up. They’d been travelling the entire time, stayed in the QZ in Baltimore for a few years before they got kicked out.”

“They got kicked out?”

“Tess got—” You cut yourself off, drop your eyes again. “They got caught smuggling in Baltimore, and FEDRA wasn’t having it. I snuck them in, and the rest is history.”

“Wait, okay, so,” Ellie starts, counting off the years on your fingers. “You’ve known each other for twenty-two years, the outbreak happened twenty years ago, but you didn’t see him again until five years after that, and you’ve been married for thirteen and—” She groans, putting her face in her hands. “That’s too much math.”

You giggle, tossing the red t-shirt she’d left between you at her. “We’ve been together a long fucking time, we can just leave it there.”

Ellie catches the shirt, sitting up, rubbing her fingers over the logo imprinted on the fabric. “So you got married in the QZ?”

“Yeah,” you nod, reaching for the fleece sweater you’d pulled out for yourself. The memory sparks. “But then Bill and Frank threw us a wedding here, actually.” Tears crawl up the back of your throat. “Surprised me with it, Joel planned the whole thing.”

“Joel did?” she repeats, surprised, her brows raising again. “No offence, he’s just kind of a grump.”

You bark a laugh, the tears receding slightly. “Time will do that to you, kid.”

She’s quiet for a moment before she reaches between you and grabs your hand. Her palm is clammy. “I’m sorry, Liv. About Bill and Frank. They sound like they were really great friends.”

You swallow hard, squeezing her hand, nodding. “Thank you, Ellie. They were.”

“Needs another hour,” Joel informs you, checking the dial on the charger.

You’ve all moved to the garage, combing through Bill’s impressive collection of camping supplies. The bed of the truck is already half-full, and Joel’s helping you load a camping stove into the backseat when Ellie excitedly declares, having turned the work sink on, “They have hot water!”

You shut the truck door, your hand grazing Joel’s back as you step around him. “We’ve got time for showers.”

“Can I go first?” Ellie asks, her question directed at you, nearly bouncing on her heels. “Please?”

“Go on,” you tell her, jutting your chin toward the door. “Just don’t be too long.”

The kid grins broadly before disappearing out the side door of the garage. After packing a few more necessities into the truck, Joel checks the battery once more before following you back into the house. You lead him upstairs, into the guest room you’d stayed in when you’d come to Lincoln in the past. There are shirts laid out on the bed, a pair of jeans that look about his size, and toiletries. A bottle of soap, toothbrushes, a tube of toothpaste, even floss. Joel can’t remember the last time he saw dental floss.

Ellie had gone in the shower in the master bedroom, and distantly, the pipes rumble as the water shuts off. “Go get in,” you tell him, jutting your chin towards the bathroom off the guest room. “I’ll go make sure she’s okay.”

Before he can get a word out, you’re gone, disappearing across the hall, and Joel turns on his heel, heading for the bathroom. Much like the rest of the house, every surface is covered in a thin layer of dust, and he cranks the shower on, but lets the water run for a while, cleaning the film from the bathtub, letting steam fill the room as he wipes down the counter with the sleeve of his shirt. It’s already dirty, anyway. The mirror fogs at the edges, and Joel finds himself face-to-face with his reflection as he strips down.

His belt goes first, the leather curling off the edge of the countertop, the buckle thunking to the surface with a metallic clang. He lets his jeans hang open, sliding slightly off his hips as he undoes the buttons on his shirt. As he reaches the last one, you reappear in the doorway, your face neutral until his shirt hangs loose, and Joel sees your bottom lip slip between your teeth.

“I thought you’d be in already,” you say, your eyes raking over him before they meet his in the mirror. “Hot water and all.”

The apartment had running water, back in the QZ. Most of the time, anyway. But hot water? Not unless you were wasting generator power heating it on the stove and dumping it into the tub. This is a luxury no matter how you look at it. “Waitin’ for you.”

For a moment, Joel wonders if you’ll protest, if the kiss you shared in the garage, heated as it was, was all you would allow. He’d drop it if you did, would respect the boundary and step back from your line in the sand. He’s about to say as much when you step through the door, pushing it closed behind you and flicking the lock shut. Your eyes find his in the mirror again, and he watches you step closer to him, his back still to you.

Your hands reach up, fingers curling in the fabric of his shirt, and you pull it back. Joel relaxes his arms, letting you peel it down, keeping it bunched at his wrists, a makeshift restraint.

“Baby,” he murmurs, turning his head to look at you when you lean up and press your lips to his spine. It makes a shudder run through him, and you move even closer, until he can curl his hands around your hips. Your own slide against his ribs, one moving up to rest right over his heart, which thumps wildly beneath your touch as the other hand roves lower, nails dragging as you slide beneath the elastic of his boxers.

You graze the base of his cock, and he can’t hold back the moan that slips out of him. You bite at the muscle of his shoulder, hard enough to make him jump, and your hand closes around him. “We have to be quiet, Joel,” you murmur. There’s a glint in your eye as he stares back at you, your eyes just visible over the slope of his shoulder.

He moves quickly, taking you by surprise. Joel pulls his hands free, his shirt falling to the ground, and he spins, turning so your hand stays where it is in his pants, catching the other with his own. He walks you backward, until your back hits the wall, and pins your hand over your head, his other fingers on your jaw. The kiss you share is rough, rougher than the one in the garage, a mess of teeth and tongue. His jeans slip down his hips, and you release him long enough to shove his boxers down, cock springing fee, curving up towards his stomach.

You pull your mouth from his just long enough to lick a stripe up your palm, and your hand closes around him again a moment later, slick with your spit, the way you twist your wrist making his eyes roll back in his skull. He releases your pinned hand, feeling it curl into his hair as he busies himself with the buttons on your shirt, the button on your jeans.

He’s panting into your mouth by the time he’s got your pants around your ankles. “Gonna fuck you in the shower,” he grits out, his forehead pressed to yours. He’s not gonna last. “Gotta do somethin’ first.”

“What—?” you start, but the question dies in your throat as he pulls your hand from his cock, dropping to his knees on the tile before you. He lifts your legs one at a time, tugging the jeans from where they’re caught around your feet, your underwear going with it.

Joel curls his hand around your knee, lifts it up and over, effectively spreading your legs as you’re pressed to the wall. He keeps your thigh in place, and presses his face against it, sucking a bruise into the sensitive flesh. You hiss above him, one hand locked in his hair, your face tilted to the ceiling.

As long as he lives, Joel will never get over the taste of you. He has you committed to memory, by now, knows exactly where to lick, where to suck, when to give you just that slight edge of teeth. He knows how to make you cum, and make you cum hard. But the moment his tongue touches you, it’s like the first time, every time, his tastebuds exploding with your unique flavour.

“Shh, baby,” he whispers into the crease of your thigh when you let out a little whimper, your hips canting towards his mouth. “Gotta be quiet.”

He drinks his fill of you. He chases away every rogue thought in his head — in both your heads — with his tongue, flicks at that little bundle of nerves until your thighs are quaking in his grip.

“Joel,” you gasp out, tugging on his hair slightly. “The water.”

“Right,” he grunts against you, knowing full well that the vibration of his voice sends a zap through you. “Tell me what you want, baby. You wanna cum on my tongue right now, or on my cock in the shower?”

“Shower,” you reply, your chest heaving with breaths. Joel grins, giving you one last lick before he’s moving back up your body, setting your shaky leg back down on the ground. He lets his mouth roam on the way up, nipping at your stomach, your chest, all the way back up to your lips.

The rest of your clothes go quickly, and he holds back the curtain for you to step under the spray. The moan you let out when the hot water hits your skin is nothing short of euphoric, and Joel’s cock twitches at the sound. He’s quick to follow, tugging the curtain back across the rain once you’re both inside. You’re standing directly under the spray, letting the water cascade over you, soaking your hair to your scalp, running in rivulets down your body.

Joel reaches for you, the warmth coating his hands first, moving up his arms as you curl your fingers above his elbows, pulling him forward to share the spray with him. He groans too, when the water hits him, and it’s coupled with a roll of your hips against his, your wet mouth seeking his beneath the water.

Your kisses are sloppy now, both of you growing languid with the heat beating down on you, hitting sore muscles and aching joints in just the right way. You slide your hand down his front, curling your fingers around his cock again, and Joel’s spine prickles. He lets you stroke him once, twice, before he’s grabbing your shoulders and turning you. Slowly, he bends you forward slightly, until your hands are pressed to the tile in front of you, your back arched and your ass pressed against his crotch.

“There she is,” he murmurs, skimming his palm up your spine, until he can lock his hand in your soaked hair. He rolls his hips now, his other hand curled around your hip, and he slides your feet apart with his, his eyes drawn down to the curve of your ass. He releases your hip to take himself in hand, and draws his hips back, angling just right, the tip of his cock catching on your entrance before he’s slamming forward, filling you to the hilt in one fell swoop.

Your hand smacks against the tile loudly, your voice punched from your lungs, and you go so tight around him for a moment, Joel thinks your cumming already. But then your head turns in his grip, your eyes nailing him in place.

“More.”

He’s never been one to deny you, and now is no exception. The ache in his bones is forgotten, the only thing he can think about right now is the feel of you around him, the way you arch up, your back pressed to his front, one hand reaching back to tangle in his hair. His hands are everywhere, mapping you out, squeezing every bit of flesh he can get his hands on. And all the while, he drives himself into you, deeper and deeper, turning your head with his grip on your hair and claiming your mouth for his own.

You curl your fingers around his wrist, pulling his hand down between your legs. He finds your clit easily, groaning when he feels how hot and wet you are, not just from the water. You whine as he pinches the bud between his fingers, drawing a tight circle that makes you clench around him.

“C’mon, baby,” he groans into your kiss, nipping at your bottom lip. “I wanna feel it.”

You shudder as you cum, and Joel feels every second of it, his own orgasm not far behind. The water pours over you both, and he just stays where it is, the aftershocks rippling through him, leaving behind that different kind of ache, the good kind.

Sighing, you fit yourself into his arms, angling your bodies so the water doesn’t hit you both in the face. Joel stays buried in you, hips flush with your ass, and you lean your head back on his shoulder, letting him dot kisses along your wet throat.

“Mmm, I needed that,” you murmur, leaning your head against his, rubbing your palms along his arms.

“Me too.” He lets his nose ride the curve of your jaw. “We could stay the night. Sleep in real beds, let me wake you up proper in the morning.” At the mere thought of your spread out on a bed for him, Joel twitches inside you.

But he feels your hesitation, feels it bristle across your skin like goosebumps. “We can’t, Joel. I-I can’t stay here, not knowing that they’re…” You trail off, but Joel nods. You don’t have to say anything more.

“I’m sorry, baby,” he murmurs, tightening his arms around you.

“I know.”

You spend what remains of the hot water actually getting clean. Joel groans when you lather his hair with shampoo, dragging your nails along his scalp, and he returns the favour. Lavender-scented soap swirls down the drain, and he wants to eat you alive.

Wrapped in towels, standing on the bathmat, Joel knocks his fingers beneath your chin and kisses you soundly. You, the one thing that always manages to keep him grounded, the one constant in this hell you’re traversing.

He can keep going, so long as he has you.

You leave Joel to dress in the bedroom, leaving him with one last kiss, raking your hands through his hair. It’s damp enough that it stays in place, slicked back over his skull, and you grin against his mouth. “Handsome.”

You can hear Ellie moving as you reach the bottom of the stairs, and turn towards the dining room to see her standing at the hutch in the corner of the room. One of the drawers is pulled open, and she has Frank’s gun in her hand. Her eyes are wide, literally like a kid caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

“Liv, I wasn’t—”

“I didn’t see anything, kid,” you say, and turn your back. Once you hear the zipper of her bag, you turn around again, handing her a stick of deodorant. “Here.”

“Nice,” she answers, but you see her eyes go wary. “Liv, the gun—”

“What gun?” you repeat, lifting your brow. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Ellie.”

She catches on, her face softening, and she stashes the deodorant as well. The stairs creak a moment later, and you turn your head to see Joel walk down, dressed in the green plaid you’d picked out.

“Well, don’t you look pretty,” Ellie comments, offering him a grin.

Joel looks at you, and you don’t miss the way his cheeks pinch with pink. “Shut up.”

You reach for Joel’s hand. “Let’s go.”

The three of you head into the garage, locking the front door from the inside before you head out. You know you don’t need to, but something about it makes you feel better. Ellie follows behind you as you walk around to the passenger’s side of the truck, and you don’t miss the way her eyes light up with curiosity.

Joel slides into the driver’s seat, and you nudge her with your elbow. “You wanna sit in the front?”

Her grin is infectious. “Really?”

You nod. “Go for it.”

You take her coat as she opens the door, leaving you to clamber into the backseat, fitting your bags and jackets between your seat and the stack of cans on the other side of the bench seat. Joel glances over his shoulder at you, a question in his eyes, and you just wave him off, reaching for your seatbelt.

In the front seat, Ellie flips the sun visor down and then back up, leaning forward to inspect it closer. You watch as she reaches out the open window, pushing on the side view mirror until it moves.

“First time in a car?” Joel asks, his voice low.

“It’s like a spaceship,” Ellie replies, and you laugh.

“No, it’s like a piece of shit Chevy S10,” your husband grits, and you lean back in your seat, settling against the headrest, “but it’ll get us there. I think. Seatbelt.”

“Hmm?”

Joel stares at the kid for a moment, his eyes cutting to you before he reaches across, grabbing the belt and pulling it across her. “Seatbelt,” he repeats.

Ellie listens, clicking the belt into place. “So cool.”

It just makes you laugh again.

Joel turns the key in the ignition, and you hold your breath before the engine rumbles to life. You watch him lift his hand, adjusting the rearview mirror, and he meets your eyes through it, something unspoken in them, comforting.

We’re gonna be okay.

He shifts the truck into drive, and slowly, it rolls forward, out of the garage and onto the road ahead. Ellie busies herself with the glove box, rummaging through the collection of tapes inside. “Would ya leave it?” Joel grumbles, glancing at her. She opens one of the cases, shaking the tape between her fingers. “Put it back, Ellie.”

“Joel,” you call softly, reaching out to put your hand on his shoulder. He’s tense, but relaxes a little when you dig your fingers in slightly. Ellie pushes the tape into the slot, and a moment later, a familiar song plays over the radio.

And I think it’s gonna hurt me, for a long, long time.

Ellie reaches for the radio, clearly not a fan, but you reach out, grabbing her arm. “Wait. Leave it.”

“Really?”

“Really,” you repeat. “It’s Linda Ronstadt.”

“You know who Linda Ronstadt is?” Joel asks, and Ellie gives him a withering look.

“You know I don’t know who Linda Ronstadt is.”

Joel turns the truck towards the gate, and as he rolls to a stop, he meets your eyes again in the rearview.

One of the last times you were able to get to Lincoln, after Frank got sick, the pair revealed to you an unofficial anniversary of sorts. “I’ve lost track of the years,” Frank told you, sat on the couch with you, leaned against your shoulder, “but what feels like a lifetime ago, on this day Bill helped me out of that hole, and I never left.”

“Just like that, huh?”

He’d chuckled, weakly pushing at your arm. “Not just like that. He cooked me dinner first, played a song on the piano.”

“What song?”

Frank had called for Bill then, and he’d appeared in the living room a moment later, concern on his face. “What? What is it?”

“Play our song?”

And he had. You had tears in your eyes by the end of it.

And I think I’m gonna miss you, for a long, long time.

Joel reaches for the remote on the dash, keying in the gate code once more. Tears crawl up the back of your throat as the fence slides across, opening for you to drive through. Joel glances over his shoulder at you, and you squeeze his shoulder again. “Eh,” Ellie mumbles, tipping her back against the headrest. “It’s better than nothin’.”

Joel pulls the truck through, and you leave Lincoln behind. You turn, looking through the back window as the gate slides shut again.

And I think I’m gonna love you, for a long, long time.

PREV | NEXT

#my fics #strawberry wine #joel miller #joel miller fic #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller fluff #joel miller angst #the last of us #the last of us fic #the last of us spoilers #joel miller x oc #joel miller x liv stone

167 notes · View notes

thisisarcanereverie · 1 year

Text

When the World Went to Shit (Chapter 2)

Joel Miller x FEM! Reader

A/N: this is a SPOILER WARNING, this contains spoliers from the second episode (and more to come). Also I did NOT bother editing, so if there are a few mistakes my bad.

WARNINGS: Canon level of violence, swears, reader is ready to fight a goddamn child, Joel is sad, talks of grief, PTSD, brief mentions of gore, Eventual Smut, pining (on both ends), grumpy idiots in love, reader is in her late 30's to early to mid 40's. DISCLAIMER NO CHARACTERS/GIFS/PICS USED ARE MINE.

Summary: 20 years later after the world went to shit you, Joel, and Tess have to take 14 year old Ellie to the Firefly base outside of Boston QZ. What was supposed to be a simple plan turned into something much more complicated.

Prev. Chapter

Shit

You take a deep breath in as you, as you and Joel watch the girl with bated breath as Tess sleeps next to you two. Joel tried to get you to sleep as well, but you refused. All the adrenaline from the running and the commotion from before still lingered in you, keeping you awake. Time seemed to go on forever, just watching her, waiting for something to happen. It was like your own brand of hell, maybe one you deserved. You always did hate to see people become infected, so fresh and recent that you’re reminded that they were human once. Even the terrifying creatures that barely looked human at all once were, had families and a past, it’s just that their luck ran out. What’s even worse, is that the fungus itself wasn’t to blame for all of this either, it just evolved to survive, like all things did. It’s just one big evolutionary mess. Before you could delve deeper about it you noticed Joel’s hand trembling. His knuckles still bloody from before, your thoughts suddenly turn to what happened before. How Joel had beaten a man to death, his PTSD took over didn’t hold back. Something you don’t blame him for, he was going to kill a little girl for stabbing him in the leg. But still, it looked like it hurt.

“Hey,” you said silently, careful not to wake Tess and Ellie, “Joel.” The man turned to you, his brown eyes glancing over at you before returning to the small figure snoring.

“Yeah,” he replied softly, careful not to wake them too.

“Let me see it,” You said nodding toward the bloodied hand that rested over the gun, you unzipped your bag before he could say no.

“I’m fi-”

“Joel,” you called his name sternly, “stop trying to be macho and let me see your goddamn hand.” he mumbled something under his breath before he shifted the gun to his other hand and let you examine the damage. You scooted closer to him, turning his hand a few different ways, gentle as to not displace something.

“Can’t be anything more than a hairline,” you said, hairline fractures were common punching injuries to the hand, usually you would treat this with ice or something cold, give him a few pain pills and tell him to lay off it for a while. But you weren’t in the QZ and couldn’t afford to lay off his hand for a while, so you did what you could do. You grab a sterilizing liquid from your bag and rip off a piece of your own shirt as a makeshift bandage.

“You don’t have to-”

“Yes I do,” You said as you continued to heal him with what you had.

“You could let me get my sentence out first before you answer.” He gruffed, you looked at him a moment before a small smile graced itself on your lips. His hair might be peppered with gray and his eyes may be hardened by time, but when he made that face you could still see who he used to be. Tommy’s cool older brother who used to smoke outside of the arcade and would always roll his eyes when you told him that smoking caused cancer. You were too wrapped up in that memory to see his gaze drift over to you, watching as you diligently worked. His hand still felt like shit, the burn of the sterilizing liquid still lingered. If you had looked at him you would’ve seen it, the conflict and desire that he had buried deep within himself ever since you came back into his life.

If only

But instead he turned his head back to the teen when you were finally done.

“What were you smiling about?” He asked, curious to know what had been on your mind at that moment.

“Nothing,” you told him as you put your stuff away. Making sure to close the lid tightly before settling it back into your backpack. “How’s the hand feeling now?”

“Like shit,” He replied, “but thanks for the help Doc.” You both sat in silence for a little longer, the crickets made a nice lullaby in the middle of all the hell going on outside.

“You should get some rest,” He said, “in a few hours we’re going to have to decide on what to do with her.” The adrenaline was wearing off a bit and you were starting to feel the energy leaving you, but you were bound and determined to stay up with him.

“Not tired,” you defied as you fought keeping your eyelids open, but pretty soon sleep overcame you as you finally fell into its embrace.

*************************************************

When you opened your eyes it was daylight, and Joel and Tess were up staring at Ellie who was starting to wake up as well. You went to sit next to Joel when he stopped you, his eyes looking up at you.

“Stay behind me.” He said, and you complied. Your physical skill left much to be desired, but you were skilled enough to take on a clicker or two if it came down to it.

Daylight streaked through the hole in the ceiling, where you could see the brunette girl start to stir on her bed of moss. Until she sat up and looked around, eyes settling on you three.

“Morning,” she greeted, standing up from where she laid. The sudden movement causes Joel to raise his weapon higher, causing Ellie to pause before sitting on the moss again, her eyes carefully eyeing him.

“Do I look like I’m infected?”

“Show us your arm.” Joel commanded, and without hesitation you saw her pull back the pink sleeve of her jacket to reveal the scar that had formed. You stepped forward, wanting a closer look. Joel went to stop you but you brushed him off, carefully you held the girl's arm in your hand. A finger delicately tracing the healed bite marks.

Healed bite marks.

Something dangerous began to bubble in you, call it hope or relief, but you stifled it down and you had too little information to start celebrating.

“How long ago were you bitten?” You asked, tearing your eyes away from the scar and into her eyes.

“3 weeks,” she replied, you swallowed the lump that had formed in your throat before you let go of her and made your way back to Joel and Tess, who sat there with tense shoulders. You were silent for a moment, trying to search for the right words so you wouldn’t sound crazy. But you guess crazy went out the window when half fungus half human zombies started emerging.

“It’s healed,” you said, “scar tissue has formed and she shows no signs of infection.”

“How is that possible?” Tess asked in disbelief, “that infection scanner glowed red.”

“It could’ve been a false positive,” you suggested, “I don’t know the finer details of it. But if she’s had this for weeks and hasn’t turned, I’d say there’s a good chance she’s immune somehow.”

Immune.

It was such a scary word to say out loud, immunity gave people hope for a vaccine or a cure. You tried to avoid that as much as you could, hope was hell. You all looked at each other a moment before Ellie could be heard in the background.

“If we’re out in the open city why aren’t we swarmed?”

“Don’t worry about that.” Joel dismissed.

“Well I’m gonna.” Ellie replied. You guessed she’s never been outside the FEDRA walls before, you heard some of the teenagers telling ghost stories. Like how some infected can spread spores, or that the entire city is full of infected ready to swarm you as soon as you take a step outside the gate.

“What was Marlene doing with an infected kid?” Tess asked as Joel gently put himself in front of you, still not trusting that Ellie wouldn’t suddenly turn.

“I’m not infected,” Ellie defended, “She found me after I was bitten.

“And she didn’t shoot you?”

“Clearly not”

What was Marlene playing at?

“She locked me up and had her guys test me everyday to see if I was getting sick.”

“How?” You asked, “how did they test you?”

“I’ve got to pee.”

“Answer her.” Tess said, her eyes focused on Ellie, who stared at her with the most deadpan expression you’ve ever seen on a 14 year old.

“They’d made me count to ten and hold out my hand and keep it steady.” She explained, “but you know what I think really impressed them was the fact that I didn’t turn into a fucking monster.” And with that she stood up finally, “Now can I please?” Joel stood up with her, careful to keep you behind him. You see her studying him a bit, something flashed across her eyes before it disappeared. You placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, trying to calm him down. Much like you he denies any sort of hope, but unlike you he was very good at being pessimistic about things like vaccines and a cure.

“Fine,” Tess breaks the silence, tossing her an old magazine, “back there you can find a spot.” She points to an open door a few feet away. The brunette walks towards the door, stepping over old shards of glass.

“There’s nothing going to be bad in here?” Ellie asked.

“Just you.”

“Oh, funny.” Ellie replied to Joel before stepping behind the door out of view. All three of you let out a sigh you didn’t know you were keeping in, Joel sat back down and turned to you.

“What happened to staying behind me?”

“She’s not infected,” you reasoned, “I had to make sure that she was telling the truth.”

“What if she wasn’t?” Joel’s ash colored eyes narrowing on your figure, “you could’ve been hurt.”

“I wasn’t,” you assured, “and neither was Tess. But someone had to take a closer look and it might as

well have been me.”

“Why do you think it might as well have bee-”

“Enough,” Tess interrupted, shutting you both up. Looking at Joel she spoke, “she’s a big girl and can make her own decisions and she has a point. Among the three of us, she’s the only one with medical knowledge, so it was better if she examined it in the first place.” You were about to send a triumphant smirk Joel's way when you felt her gaze shift to you. “And while you may have had a point Joel did too. You can’t be so reckless.” A moment of silence happens before she speaks again, eyes trained back on Joel who was looking towards the door like he was waiting. “She made it through the fucking night, Joel.”

“It doesn’t matter.” He dismissed her. “It’s going to happen sooner or later.” he looks at her before turning his gaze to the ground, “Alright? We’re still close to the wall, we sneak her back into the QZ and we find a different way of getting the battery.”

“This,” Tess emphasized, “is our best shot.” Joel sighs as Tess makes him look at her again, “Someone’s going to notice her arm. They’re going to scan her…and then they’ll kill her.”

“Well better them, than us,” Joel snapped, “You need to stop talking about this kid like she’s got some kinda life in front of her.” You sigh and rub the bridge of your nose, this was messy and complicated. How in the hell did you manage to find your way in this situation in the first place.

Oh yeah.

Cause Joel Miller said he fucking needed you.

Just as you were about to add your own two cents in footsteps could be heard approaching. You all went silent as you watched Ellie emerge from behind the door and toss the magazine at Tess’s feet before sitting down on her bed of moss.

“Are you hungry?” Tess asked as she opened up the small bag of ration jerky, “you can share some of ours.”

“Thanks, Marlene sent me with my own,” Ellie thanked as she pulled out something from her bag. The three of you shared the jerky and eyeing the sandwich she had pulled out. You watched as she takes a bite, you were almost certain that it was chicken.

“Is that chicken?” Tess asked.

“Yeah,” the brunette confirmed, “Marlene said they got it from smugglers.” An awkward pause fills the air as her dark eyes dart between the three of you, “I’m guessing not you guys.” Suddenly Tess stands up and walks over to Ellie, Joel was quick to stand as well.

“Why are you so important to Marlene?” Tess asked as she stuffed her hands into her pockets, “and don’t lie or we’ll take you back.”

��You don’t take me back, you don’t get your battery.”

“You heard that,” Tess scoffs, “then you must’ve heard that he wants to shoot you.” Ellie’s eyes darted to Joel who kept her gaze as Tess kneels in front of her. “I’m gonna talk to you like an adult, ok?” Tess says gently bringing Ellie’s attention back to her, “Joel, Doc and I aren’t good people. We’re doing this for us, because apparently you’re worth something. But we don’t know what you’re worth, if we don’t know what we have.” You see Tess’s eyes narrow on the 14 year old, “So answer my question,” a moment of tense silence happens before you could see the brunette sigh and cover her face, mumbling something before replying.

“There’s a Firefly base camp somewhere out west with doctors,” she starts, “they’re working on a cure.”

“Mm-hm” Joel interrupts, “I’ve heard this before.” Your eyes narrowed on him as he interrupted her, he was starting to really irritate you.

“And whatever happened to me,” Ellie continued, her eyes also narrowing on Joel, “is the key to finding the vaccine.” Joel said at the same time. His eyes narrowed on her in a cynical way, his guard was up.

“That’s what this is?” he asked, “We’ve heard this a million times, vaccines and miracle cures. None of it works…ever.”

“Fuck you man I didn’t ask for this.” Ellie snapped, standing up.

“You and me both.” Joel retorted, turning away from her, Tess got up from her kneeling position to get in between the two.

“Joel, you need to calm down.” You finally spoke, looking him in the eyes, trying to keep your voice even and not tell him to shut the fuck up instead.

“This isn’t going to end well Doc.” He warned, grabbing your wrist with his good hand, “we need to go back.” His eyes intensely focused on you, almost begging you to just listen to him for once in your life. But you took a step back.

“And do what exactly?” you questioned, “You killed a FEDRA soldier last night, or almost did, all of us are outside of the QZ without permission, and if they hadn’t raided our units by now they will soon and guess what they’ll find Joel? They’ll find evidence of smuggling and illegal weapons.” You step closer to him now, hands resting on your hips, “we go back and we will all face the gallows, it doesn’t matter who we are.”

You were right, and he knew it. His shoulders drop as he pinches the bridge between his eyebrows.

“Let’s just finish it” Tess says, “it doesn’t matter if she is or isn’t what the Firefly’s say, if they believe that’s what she is…then…we get what we want.” You could see his gaze soften as he looked at Tess, giving a begrudging nod to her before looking at Ellie. Sunlight gave her a deceiving halo, before he shook his head as he looked between you and Tess.

“If she so much as twitches-”

You turned to Ellie to see her give a half hearted impression of an infected. All of you gave her a deadpan face.

“Don’t.” Tess said as she and Joel went to move the piece of debris locking you in here. Ellie stops and

gives an awkward scratch to the back of her neck in embarrassment. Both you and Ellie grab your backpacks, you grab Joel’s as well and hand it to him.

You squint as daylight invades your eyes, blinding you a moment from the ruins of Boston. The crickets were long gone, only a few screams could be heard from the far distances. Alright, You thought, Here we fucking go.

237 notes · View notes

blocksruinedme · 2 years

Text

Something big is happening in Empires & Hermitcraft. Let's discuss! Specifically, Grian, Smallishbeans, LDshadowlady and Fwhip's episodes the week of October 9, 2022. I've clipped all the relevant scenes down below. I'm very interested in corrections and commentary!

[Note: They all ended their episodes at a portal with weird stuff happening, so if you're looking to check videos for rift lore, maybe skip to the ends.]

- October 9 - Grian finds a button in front of his Hermitcraft rift. It says "Begin?" Grumbot[1] gives him a message that says "Push the button". He tries not to, but eventually gives in. (This is typical Grian behavior.) (HC 9: Ep 23)

- October 11 - Lizzie finds a portal on Empires that bears some suspicious resemblance to Grian's rift. Hoping she might get crystals, she sends a fox named Gary through on a minecart to investigate, and bring back "lots of crystals, the shinier the better". They hit the portal, Gary goes through, the minecart doesn't. (Is Gary a modded villager? That's lizzie's thing?) (Empires s2, Ep 11)

- October 13

(1) Joel spies the portal from his bridge, having heard about it already. He says he'll send something through because Lizzie already did. He sends one of his Jimmy dolls - it's important to remember the doll is named "Smallishbeans's Head". There's no minecart, he just chucks it in. (Empires s2, ep 19) (2) Fwhip hears an explosion and finds the portal, decides to not engage with any of it. Later, Lizzie comes to Fwhip for help rescuing Gary, and they send Fwhip's creature, "Sniff, Explorer of the Deep", through the portal on a minecart to get Gary. I have no idea what kind of creature Sniff is. Some modded goblin horse I get. Snort's older brother. idk. (Empires S2 : Building a GOBLIN LAVA FORGE, because he can't be bothered to use episode numbers I guess?)

Maybe it's not Grian's rift, maybe Hermitcraft and Empires aren't connected, but that would be WILD. If you don't know, Grian is IRL friends with Lizzie and Joel, so them collaborating makes a lot of sense. Sausage is having big flashbacks to Empires s1 and Afterlife SMP. Gem and FalseSymmetry are in both Empires & Hermitcraft, and False's plot is about having woken up in a strange place. Pearl is in Hermitcraft, and was in Empires s1, and there's deep lore about her that I'm not caught up on, but she already exists between series, she sent Oli (theorionsound) from Afterlife SMP to Empires season 2, from her base in the sky. She's been Watching everything! She's a Saint? A Goddess? (I am going to catch up, I only finished emp1 this month.) And I'm told her afterlife/empires sky base is her hermitcraft s8 base.

The Jimmy toy looks like Jimmy and has Joel's name. Their Double Life soulmates are in Hermitcraft. I saw a comic once that had Tango finding a Jimmy doll and it feeling familiar. Thus, I am now insane and will be at least until empires s2 is over, probably forever.

Here's some videos and some transcripts, but I've been at this two hours and I'm not transcribing them all, sorry!

(I will hopefully keep updating as things develop, but no promises. Probably with less transcription. I'll tag them all #mcyt crossover, because who knows how deep this will go.)

youtube

Joel transcript, at 13:26 - Joel spies the portal. "and whilst we're here, look at that. that's lore right there. weird lore stuff's happening on the server guys. what is it? I don't know. But I saw that Lizzie put something in it, so we should go put something in it as well. So what better than this little toy man here? Well, the toy version of the toy man. Have fun little toy-- oh, it's missed. Let's try again." [toy name says "Smallishbeans's Head"] "Have fun little toy man! And just like that, he's gone. I hope he's okay, but if he's not okay, then that's fine as well to be honest.

Fwhip transcript

11:57 - Fwhip says Jimmy is toying with his heart. </3

12:00 - Fwhip hears an explosion. "What? Bridge? What is (x3) that? I'm sorry but this is brand new. How did this pop up here out of the wall? [confused goblin noises] You know what, if I've learned anything being underground in the goblin cavern it's don't dig where you're not supposed to be digging. I'm going to be leaving that as if I've never saw it [things about copper and cave safety] spooky things are happening".

15:30 - (too long to transcribe) Lizzie blows the emergency horn, says there's a situation with Gary, the greatest explorer who ever lived in Animalia. She's upset that Gary hasn't come back, Fwhip tells her that he heard an explosion earlier, Lizzie is more upset, wants a rescue mission. Fwhip says his empire's greatest explorer, "Sniff, Explorer of the Deep" has just returned home, [they laugh heartily]. Lizzie takes Fwhip and Sniff to the "crystal cave". Fwhip says maybe Gary did the explosion. Lizzie says Gary had a very specific mission (get crystals) and he'd never stray from the mission protocols. They tell Sniff to find and bring back Gary. Sniff spins around a lot, because he's excited for a job. They put him on a minecart, Lizzie makes a Harry Potter reference (which she and Joel do all the time), and the episode cuts right there, no outro.

Time stamped links to the original videos (give them a like!):

Joel https://youtu.be/rUmWjXaJGcw?t=805

Lizzie: https://youtu.be/bunhaERjxmE?t=533 Fwhip: https://youtu.be/jI3bYNJXuVs?t=717 (second part is at 15:30)

Grian: it's the whole episode https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Onsbmy3r70g

[1] Grumbot is... in HC s7 Grian and Mumbo he made a robot son to help Mumbo win the mayoral election, then they lied to him and sai that he won, and put him in a (nice) box. Now there's a grumbot here and maybe he's from an AU and he says creepy things like "My Grian was sorry too" and I've only watched bits of all this.

#mcyt crossover #hermitcraft #hermitcraft s9 #grian #grian's rift #grumbot #ldshadowlady #fwhip #smallishbeans #empires s2 #empiresblr #empires fwhip #empires joel #empires lizzie #empires season 2 #empires smp #hermitblr

242 notes · View notes

foiblepnoteworthy · 1 year

Text

uhh psa about the last of us

Well I'm replaying The Last of Us and it comes out on Sunday so imma write a little trigger warning list for anyone who might need it bc it is a kinda dark game and the show looks like it's gonna be faithful. Might not all be accurate to the show, but here's how the game goes down.

I tried to limit the spoilers but i did not do a good job, as there were times I thought it best to be very specific. If you read this you will basically know who dies in the game and how (ie i say ‘x’ happens to the gay man, well, there’s not many main character gay men).

I’d still advise checking out the first paragraph or so if you’re the sort to read trigger warnings

feel free to send me an ask if you want more details on anything, and apologies if i forgot anything

also here’s a link to the ‘does the dog die’ page for tlou game, in which people have asked about and discussed triggers in the game. might work better for you.

Preface:

The biggest triggers are gun violence and suicide. They appear a lot throughout the game. There is also an attempted grooming of a child.

If gun violence or suicide are triggers you probably shouldn’t watch it. The grooming will likely be confined to one episode, which you may be able to simply skip. If you don’t think any of these will bother you at all, maybe best leave this list so you can avoid spoilers, as I’m going to go into a bit more detail for anyone on the fence.

The game is pretty diverse, for a video game at least, which means that there are gay characters, women, and characters of colour being hurt. This is more because this is a story where people get hurt than because of biases of the writers I would say, but it's open to debate. If you’re sick of seeing characters who are like you dying horribly, you might wanna leave it. A lot of people die horribly in this story, including children.

(Notes:

There’s a good chance I’ve missed something. I may have forgotten something that happened, or a common trigger. There may be things in the show that didn’t appear in the game.

I’ve included headers to help navigate and skip spoilers if you wanna look more closely at just one of those topics.

There is an ‘other’ section at the bottom if you’ve got something else you’re concerned about, or you can check out the ‘does the dog die’ page. There shouldn’t be too many spoilers there.

I will specify race, age, gender, and/or sexuality of characters when relevant here. I.e. I think it’s relevant to say when a child specifically is harmed, or a black character specifically is threatened with a gun. I hope this is the correct and respectful way to do this, I’m open to critique.

I am being blunt in my descriptions.

I am not trigger starring any of my words.

When I say a character is ‘named’, I mean that they’ve been on screen for a bit and the audience probably cares about them.)

Guns and violence:

There are lots of guns, naturally. Not only are zombies shot at but people too, lots of people, by the protag and his allies, and there is an organised militia killing people.

There is a scene where the character discuss the military deliberately killing masses of unarmed civilians seeking refuge (bodies onscreen).

In the opening scene a soldier shoots and kills a named child. There is a later scene where a named black boy is shot and killed by another named character.

Joel is notably proficient with killing, and has killed innocents in the past. He frequently kills zombies and gangs trying to hurt him. He may fire first or attack people unaware - this is usually out of self-defence, after being given reason to assume they will hurt him if given the chance.

There is a scene where Joel threatens to shoot a named defenceless black man. There is a scene where he does shoot and kills an unarmed named black woman.

A named character once pointed a gun at Joel while visibly very mentally unstable (shock, not mental illness).

There is a scene wherein Joel tortures two unnamed men.

Characters see bodies quite often and find notes from them the player can read. They’re set dressing, they’re just there in the street, a lot of them go unburied, and they also feel like real people due to the notes.

There is a grave of a very small child.

Grooming:

A character attempts to groom Ellie while she’s separated from Joel.

He seems genuinely trustworthy at the start - I liked him when I first played it, and I saw his first untrustworthy moment, wherein he had pretended he didn’t have a gun when he secretly did, as kinda funny/charming. It made sense in context okay

He is genuinely unsettling. Exactly what he wants from Ellie is unspecified. The groomer is also a cult leader and a cannibal, and after she refuses him and breaks his finger he decides to eat her. They have a very violent confrontation.

Suicide:

The named characters committing suicide include a woman (death mostly offscreen, technically was a self-sacrifice but also not really, discussion of her intent onscreen); a gay man (death offscreen, method, body and note onscreen); and a black man (death onscreen).

The first kill of the game, should the player choose to accept it, is a mercy kill of someone who has been infected.

There is a scene wherein an unnamed man leaves a recorder with his note and also some valuable intel and Joel skips past his note, clearly annoyed at the man, to get to the intel. The man’s body has decomposed to a skeleton and there is a clear hole in his skull.

There was a scene where Joel and Ellie saw the bodies of people who had killed themselves and discussed why people might do it in a post-apocalyptic society - fear of a horrible death, essentially, from zombies, infection, starvation, or gangs. Depression was not mentioned but could be considered implied as a reason - it could be taken as an implication that Joel had considered it before.

Joel finds a note from someone who was hiding children from infected. With no way out, they killed the children, covered the bodies with blankets, and killed themself. The bodies are onscreen.

A named character killed himself as a knee-jerk reaction to the death of a loved one.

A(n implied) gay man killed himself because he was infected, which I don't think was intended as a parallel to aids but it can be read that way.

Other:

There are moments where the zombies are somewhat humanized - the Fireflies wear dog tags, meaning that after killing a zombie you can sometimes find out their name and figure out who they were. Maybe you even read a letter belonging to them earlier. Idk this is just kinda fucked up, creeped me out.

Death of a horse (onscreen, named, violent)

Animal hunting (for food)

The zombies are genuinely quite creepy

idk the university holdout kinda upset me, these kids were waiting for people to come for them and no one bothered and now they’ve been dead for years.

A lot of the architecture is ruined and dangerous, might bother people with a germ phobia (I doubt anyone’s had a tetanus shot in ages), or with claustrophobia or agoraphobia.

I’ve probably missed something.

#tlou #the last of us #joel and ellie #joel tlou #sorry if im spamming the tag (idk the etiquite ngl)#should i blaze this?#i am deliberately not tagging this as triggers bc like. yeah its those people im trying to talk to #pls reblog this it took me like an hour

18 notes · View notes

skystarry75 · 2 years

Text

Life SMP Series 3 Divorcees

Spoilers for the first session, if you don’t know, the divorcees are Scott, Cleo, Pearl and Martyn. Why? Well...

Martyn and Pearl spent most of the first session together, doing things that Scott and Cleo deemed overly dangerous and generally not good ideas. They went into the nether, fought blazes, and got set on fire a bunch. Scott and Cleo were not happy about that, eating quite a lot of food just to keep their health up.

So, Scott and Cleo decided that their soulmates are not worth it, and have ditched them for each other. Martyn then ditched Pearl, meaning we currently have 5 soulmate pairs, 1 chosen pair, and 2 solo players who’s soulmates don’t want to be with them.

Thing is, it does give them an advantage. Partnering with someone who isn’t your soulmate means 2 things! 1. You basically have twice as much health as a soulmate duo attacking, since you don’t share hearts and they do. 2. If your soulmate isn’t in the fight, they can instead focus on eating and healing, and even potentially sending reinforcements to assist if it seems to be going badly.

The only disadvantage is that the loyalty won’t last. One will go red first or die, and only one soulmate pair can survive. Soulmates may share health, but can deal twice as much damage as a solo player, so the betrayal will likely kill the solo player, thus killing their soulmates. The last few episodes will probably be full of panic and problems for those who chose to be apart from their soulmates.

Best case scenario for the solo- Those separated betray first with traps, taking their group down and then joining up with their soulmate. If the soulmate still won’t accept it, make a small watch-tower nearby and help defend them from their enemies. The begrudging soulmate may not like it, but it’s not like they can kill you without killing themselves.

My guess as to how things are gonna go now? Martyn’s gonna find Ren and BigB, joining them and effectively remaking the shadow alliance from Last Life (minus Lizzie who isn’t playing) or do what I think Pearl will do. Which is probably that she’s gonna tell someone her sob story and end up teaming with another duo. They then can’t really touch the other Divorcees for the purpose of making sure Pearl isn’t killed off too early. That extra set of hands and health is useful.

As for the other teams, if Pearl or Martyn joined-

Grian would probably be ecstatic to have someone else to help him babysit Scar and help build a nice home. Most likely Pearl, since she knows both of them quite well already, and would definitely be someone that Grian trusts to build a home, keep the group on track, and help prevent Scar dying.

If Etho and Joel hear about their woes, they may decide to bring one in, if only as a way to ensure the other Divorcees co-operation, and maybe the advantage of having someone not bound to another in the group.

If Tango and Jimmy take them in, it will be 90% for the woe-is-me story and a general “we losers gotta stick together!” vibe. If Pearl joins them, she’s probably gonna end up doing at least 70% of the building.

If Ren and BigB take one in, and it would probably be Martyn, they’d probably be chill about it. Well, except that Scott and Cleo are their nearest neighbors. That may not go down well with Cleo especially if it’s Martyn.

I’m not sure if Impulse and Bdubs would actually take one in, since both now have horns, and Impulse has become really annoyed by them. Still, they’re nice enough they might just take pity on one of them if they hear the story, especially if it’s Pearl who got rejected by her soulmate and ditched by the person she spent the first episode with.

Of note, almost everyone appears to have clustered fairly close in one corner. Like, if Pearl or Martyn wanted to go at it alone they could try to build something in the opposite corner and rarely be bothered. They’d just need to be careful because they’d be easy targets, and being that far away from your soulmate means it’s harder to get reinforcements.

#double life smp #zombiecleo #smajor1995 #pearlescentmoon #inthelittlewood

34 notes · View notes

rpmemesbyarat · 3 years

Conversation

RP Meme Lines from "AHS: Coven" Episode 11: "Protect the Coven"

Why I had to leave Paris, the jewel of civilization, return to this shit hole, I'll never understand.

They have no inner light.

They have no intellect to engage with.

I fear my restless mind will become feeble.

I need inspiration.

I hear crochet is popular in New Orleans.

Do I have to bother with this thing?

Do I have to kill it?

Please don't make me.

Give me that cleaver.

How hard can it be to chop the head off a chicken?

I'm hurt bad.

Should I run and find a doctor?

We want to stop that blood.

I think I'm going to like it here.

What can be done?

Bitch, you left me for dead.

Oh, get your ass over here.

That's for dismembering me.

The most important thing is that you're safe.

None of us are safe!

I've been suffering the tortures of the damned.

I'm not taking another step!

I suppose I was an unhappy child.

I kept to myself, communing with rodents and small animals.

No one thought I'd amount to much, but I surprised them all.

I married well.

My lavish soirées became a coveted invitation.

It goes perfectly with the wine.

How the mighty have fallen does not begin to describe my torment.

I've been giving plenty thought to how I'm gonna deal with you.

Thinking this time, I'll finish what I started.

Stick that head of yours in a construction site shit hole.

You seem half mad, dear.

I think this could amplify it.

Ah, figs, ah, figs, Mother Nature's brown diamonds.

Figgy pudding cures the blues and banishes acne.

Lately, I've been asking myself just what was it that fed my soul back then.

I just... developed a scientific fascination for their... their body parts and their... their organs... and their cries of agony.

Oh, what have we here, a romantic bubble bath?

Don't you care at all?

So it wouldn't bother you if I got on my knee pads and blew him, right here, right now.

You're a peach.

You think you can just throw me away for some junior varsity mall rat?

He's not your slave.

God, you're such a brat!

What is all that racket?!

You are the worst kind of Hollywood cliché

You're a dried-up old Hot Pocket, but I don't judge.

You can't speak to me that way-- I am your elder.

Crotchless panties for everyone.

Well, putting you together was fun but taking you apart's gonna be even more fun.

Ah, go slow with that.

I want to take you there.

We'll spend out the rest of our days drinking gin rickeys on this porch.

What's so funny?

Oh, imagine me a farm wife. Milking the cows.

Well, you've lived a big life.

You went everywhere, you've met everyone, you've done everything that your stormy little heart desired.

But you were never ever truly happy, huh?

We could live like normal folk for a change.

Not very robust, were you?

Feel better?

I thought you'd run off.

One doesn't explain art.

I thought you were tongueless.

Are you saying you're dead?

I spent enough time in the grave to know a spirit when I encounter one.

I've been watching you.

A life without purpose is no life at all.

I thought I'd found my purpose. Or at least a hobby.

I think I just made a mess.

Guess who gets to clean it up.

You long for release.

I know how you can achieve it.

I've been cursed.

It's a violation of the natural order.

Why do you care?

The bitch is immortal.

Are you saying I can kill her?

I can provide you with the means. But you have to do something for me first.

It won't be cheap.

Dirty hippie can kiss my ass.

Things around here change fast, but damn.

You are a very strong and powerful young woman.

But how did you survive?

Turns out I got some new powers.

He shot you with this?

Not even a silver bullet can stop me.

Don't touch me.

My eyes are open.

You are just as weak as you've ever been.

Might want to take one long-ass vacation. Let somebody else run this joint for a while.

No enemies on the outside perhaps, but danger lurks within these blanched walls.

Everyone knows it.

I have no secrets.

I deserve better lies than that.

I just need a drink. Steady my nerves.

I've done what you asked.

You're sure this is the original gown?

There's a certificate of authenticity in there somewhere.

It's unsavory.

Now, before somebody notices that half the silver's gone missing, you give me what you promised me.

It's that powerful?

You'll be blinded by the sheer craftsmanship.

A sapphire and topaz harvester ant made for me by Joel Arthur Rosenthal, the Fabergé of our time.

Do you want me to wear it?

You could never pull it off, darling.

I want you to hock it in case of emergency.

I'm completely lost here.

I had a love like that once.

If you stay here, your life is in grave danger.

Run away together and start your life over.

How dare you be so unromantic and so very, very selfish.

Be ready for anything, but keep the dogs at bay.

This war, it's a thing of the past.

Sometimes I feel like I'm trying to rid the State Department of Communists.

This is the end.

God knows all the money in the world can't buy good taste.

Too much?

You got any last words?

To the beginning of a long, long friendship.

Only thing that could ruin this moment is to have to look at your fugly face.

I'll leave when I'm finished.

Stupid cow!

I'm not finished.

Your fate is sealed.

Oh, you stupid rube!

Damn you. Damn you!

The only thing I'm allergic to is you.

You were most likely to cooperate.

You have to finish packing.

I have these feelings inside that I can't... I can't control.

We're leaving, just like planned.

#rp memes #rp meme #rp starters #roleplay memes #roleplay meme #roleplay starters #ahs #ahs coven

7 notes · View notes

seeroftodayandtomorrow · 5 years

Text

Tdb rewatch: Movin’ Out

German title: Aufbruch, which means departure, though I think here it’s also meant as a feeling of being on the move, of new things to come.

I liked this better this time than I did when it first aired. I admit I was one of those who felt that this episode lacked in the Klaine; I didn’t necessarily want them to make out or plan their wedding or anything, but I felt their scene together in the loft was very awkward and it felt like Chris Colfer had checked out.

This time, I didn’t notice it all that much, mainly, I think, because of course I watched it in German and was distracted by how especially annoying Kurt’s voice was this episode. I still think that this particular scene, though supportive and loving, is awkwardly edited and just looks weird, though. There are, however, things that bother me more this episode.

Don’t get me wrong, I quite like it. I love Billy Joel, so the music is great except one song which I will mention later. And I love Becky’s storyline, although she makes me very uncomfortable with her constant sexual innuendo and I also wonder where her parents are in all of this. But I think it’s great that she has a storyline about graduating and knowing her options and being afraid. Also, I would have liked to have an independent living class as well, please.

I also think it’s nice to show that there are other options than going into show business, even if it’s mainly lip service and Blaine is of course going to be a performer like everybody else in this club. And it’s ridiculous that him applying to other schools as well is made out to be a sign of his anxiety instead of the only reasonable thing to do. And I love the part where Will says, You may be right, I may be crazy, and Sue says,Oh no, no, you’re not gonna do it and then they sing that song.

What I don’t like is, 1. Sam’s storyline. Yes, there might be a nice message about self acceptance there but it doesn’t really mean anything to me because Sam has, by all accounts, a perfect body and so the message is, Please accept your perfect body as it is. But I hate, hate, that interview at the college. It is so cringe-worthy, and I always hate scenes that make me want to leave the room in second hand embarrassment.

And I don’t like the talk Marley and her mom have about saving yourself for someone special. I mean there’s nothing wrong with wanting to do that, but I don’t get why virginity is still glorified.

Worst of all, however, is Ryder. It’s perhaps a little ironic that I dislike him and not Jake, who, after all, cheated, but he is so pushy and pressure-y here and I don’t like it. “Date me, I’m nice!” So I also don’t like the song Innocent Man. I like that Marley tells him in the end that she doesn’t want a relationship with him, but I think she should have refused the date from the get-go. And that he shouldn’t have asked. I thought it was like, part of good breeding not to bother someone who has just gone through a bad breakup?

As I said last week, this is about the point where I started to get interested in Jake. He has certain self-destructive tendencies, and I want to know what becomes of him. Sigh.

#tdb rewatch #tdb rewatch: movin out #todaydreambelievers

4 notes · View notes

buzzdixonwriter · 5 years

Text

Chillin’ With Netflix (2018 edition)

LOST IN SPACE

Really well done, family friendly space opera. Top notch production values, good / smart writing, superlative cast.

And despite all this, it couldn’t keep my attention past episode 4.

I put the blame on me, not this new series by writers Matt Sazama and Burk Sharpless.

As a preteen, I was in the prime target audience for the original Lost In Space back in the mid-1960s, and that series -- despite its wildly varying tone -- created an iconic show that, try as they might, every subsequent re-make struggles to overcome.

Seriously, it’s like trying to remake I Love Lucy only without Lucille Ball, Desi Arnaz, Vivian Vance, and William Frawley.

Yeah, it can be done, but why bother? Use that talent and energy to do something in the same vein but different.

That being said, I deny no one their pleasure. If you haven’t seen / loved the original, try this version; you might very well like it.

. . .

THE HAUNTING OF HILL HOUSE

Excellent production / writing / cast / performances.

I started out really liking it.

That enthusiasm faded.

I ended up enjoying this new retelling of The Haunting Of Hill House but came away feeling it fell short of 1963’s The Haunting, the first and still best adaptation of Shirley Jackson’s classic ghost story.

First off, a definition of terms (which will explain my enthusiasm fade): In order to work, a ghost story must take place in the audience’s head.

That is to say, the reader / viewer must be left with two equally possibly yet mutually exclusive possibilities: There are such things as ghost, or the haunting is purely psychological in the mind/s of the character/s.

Even in stories such as the original novel or the 1963 film where the possibility is presented that at least one of the characters is mentally unstable and is either imagining / causing the manifestations, the book / movie / series must never come down concretely in either camp.

To make it purely psychological turns it into a drama about mental illness, the make it supernatural moves it from the realm of “ghost story” into “monster movie” where the monster happens to be a ghost.

A ghost story doesn’t have to be scary, simply…haunting. Portrait Of Jenny is a bitter-sweet romance that despite a lack of spookiness remains a bona fide ghost story.

(Ghost comedies such as Topper, Blythe Spirit, Ghost Busters, etc. are a different genre entirely akin to leprechaun / alien comedies where a fantastic being disrupts the lives of the human protagonists.)

This version works well, even though it doesn’t maintain the high level it starts with. The family dynamics are well done, the performances excellent.

For the first couple of episodes the series tries to walk the line, raising the possibility and eventually confirming that mental illness runs through the family that moved into Hill House, but the moment the ghosts begin manifesting themselves, it paradoxically stops being a ghost story and becomes a booga-booga story). Virtuosity for the sake of virtuosity also works against the production, occasionally dragging audiences out of the story to admire how clever the film makers are.

It also gets a little too convoluted and overly melodramatic towards the end, however (ghost stories work best at their simplicity.

And it is not an upbeat ending but a really horrific one as the family in question literally consumes itself.

This version inhabits a godless universe, and the apparent “good” ending is really a terrible one of eternal damnation (albeit not in the Christian sense).

I recognize and appreciate the level of craftsmanship that went into this, and recommend it to people who like scary stories.

But it ain’t what I’d call a ghost story, and it sure ain’t what Jackson would call one, either.

. . .

SHE-RA AND THE PRINCESSES OF POWER

I'm not the target audience for She-Ra in either incarnation.

That being said, I watched episodes 1-3 and 12-13.

It looks good to me. The story was familiar, but like old B-Westerns it's the kind of genre where familiarity breeds affection, so no complaints there.

Pacing seemed slow, but the design and animation was good, voices top notch. Clearly a heavy anime influence.

Really liked the wide range of physical types and acknowledgement of LGBT characters. Lots of fun with the various interpersonal relationships and characterizations, especially Swift Wind, the smartass flying unicorn.

They did a really good job with this show and the characters seemed more like real teens than the previous incarnation.

. . .

THE BALLAD OF BUSTER SCRUGGS

Well, this one I can recommend whole heartedly and without reservation.

Joel and Ethan Coen have shown a remarkable penchant for period films and a strong affinity for Westerns in the past, and this anthology film offers a dazzling grab bag of good / off beat stories that range from the ridiculous to the realistic, though a couple of them are Westerns by location only as they don’t really rely on any of the themes that define the Western genre.

The stories are:

“The Ballad Of Buster Scruggs” -- a hilarious send up of old Hollywood Western clichés starting with the quintessential sing cowboy trope and spiraling into full bore craziness from there.

“Near Algodones” -- a would-be bank robber has a really bad day. Despite its dazzling editorial style, one of the more conventional stories -- and yet it manages to evoke both classic Buddhism, the crucifixion, and the ultimate sardonic joke all in the last 30 seconds.

“Meal Ticket” -- a Twilight Zone-ish story about a backwoods impresario and his limbless performer, told almost entirely silently except for quotes from poems and dramatic works and the occasional song. While it makes good use of its Western locale, there’s really nothing in the story to tie it to the West; it could just as easily occur on a Mississippi riverboat, the back alleys of White Chapel, or the slums of Mumbai.

“All Gold Canyon” -- based on a story by Jack London, it’s a look at how hard and demanding a prospector’s life could be (with a virtually unrecognizable Tom Waits as the grizzled old prospector). The Coen Brothers use their location to the fullest advantage, recreating the feel of what such land must have felt like before the first settlers moved in.

“The Gal Who Got Rattled” -- the longest, most realistic, and most bitter-sweet of the stories, set on a wagon train heading to Oregon, and focusing on a young woman who is definitely not the sort who should be making such a trip. While we can look back from our safe vantage point in the 21stcentury and recognize the Indian Wars were the direct result of rapacious land grabbing by Western settlers, this story does an excellent job of showing just how terrifying it would be to sit on the receiving end of a tribal attack. The ending is a morally complex one, well worth pondering, and especially ambiguous given the nature of the story’s framing element.

“The Mortal Remains” -- weakest of the stories, but salvaged by strong performances. Another Twilight Zone style story, and if you didn’t guess the ending by the one minute mark I’ve got a bridge in Florida made of solid gold bricks I’d like to sell you.

. . .

AMERICAN VANDAL

Yowza! This is one of the best series I’ve ever seen, and it’s perfect in damn near every way.

On the surface it’s a parody of various true crime documentary series, especially Netflix’ own Making A Murderer. It’s told from the point of view of two students in their high school’s audio-visual club who make a documentary about an act of vandalism directed at the school’s teachers and the student who is blamed for it.

Of course, as they investigate, they turn up evidence that the accused student did not commit the vandalism, and in their pursuit of the truth uncover several more secrets on their way to the big reveal.

At first blush, the makings of a solid show.

But what co-creators Tony Yacenda and Dan Perrault manage to pull off with this is nothing short of astounding, a fun parody of a genre that raises interesting questions about both the genre they’re parodying and the issue of truth and guilt, while on top of that adding an incredibly complex yet easy to follow overlay of conflicting characters and emotions.

They get every single detail right, and even seemingly throw away lines / scenes / characters get fleshed out in amazing and unexpected ways (for example, one extremely minor character, with no significant dialog, who appears only briefly on camera as comic relief in one or two early episodes is later revealed to be severely alcoholic, and in recalling his earlier appearances, one realizes the character must be suffering through a genuinely hellish existence).

Dylan, the accused student, starts out as a character of fun and amusement, a high school goofball of Spicoli proportions, only to come to a sad and ultimately terrifying end as he realizes just how dumb and dead-end his life is.

I cannot praise thise series enough. Very rarely will I look at someone else’s work and say “I wish I had done that.” American Vandal is one of the rare exceptions.

The series has two seasons, the first involving Dylan and the vandalism of the teachers’ cars, the second involving a food poisoning incident at a private school the original two students are invited to investigate. Season two is very strong but lacks “the shock of the new” that season one provided; it’s high quality and entertaining, but not as compelling as the original.

. . .

#television #media #comedy #Netflix #Coe Brothers #Lost In Space 2018 #The Haunting Of Hill House 2018 #She-Ra And The Princesses Of Power #The Ballad Of Buster SCruggs #American Vandal

2 notes · View notes

monkeypretzel · 6 years

Text

OK, so far so good. Nice to hear from Joel after six months of near-silence. Things are going really well? That’s good news! You’re going into the studio Monday? Well, I guessed that from the high level Season 11 backers being invited to have set visits at their expense a few months ago talking about how excited they were for next week. I hope they have lots of fun.

I get that secrecy is very important to you, Joel. Not necessarily because of having everything be a big surprise for the fans, but maybe a little bit because you don’t have to listen to any questions about what you’re doing when nobody knows what you’re doing.

No, certainly you don’t want to make shows by committee, because again that involves answering questions and as you’ve stated in numerous interviews, the creative process can’t be questioned. You can’t explain why something is funny, after all. I’m going to believe you when you say you took suggestions from the fans seriously, but I question which of those fans they are. Are they the fans that have hundreds of dollars to meet you at VIP events and premieres, or the ones with thousands of dollars to get invited to set visits in secret? Jonah has tweeted that he (they?) pretty much doesn’t bother to read comments, so I wonder how much the feedback is filtered before it reaches you? Do you read the hundred of thousands of comments or do you rely on others to tell you what they said? I suppose I shouldn’t ask questions like that. I don’t understand creativity, I guess. But you’re welcome, anyway.

Hmmm. Suddenly there’s a whole lot about binge-watching that really hasn’t been a point of previous updates or interviews. “How to tweak the Forrester experiments...”...to the way Netflix’s viewing model works. Hmmm. Given the next paragraph talking about new viewers not giving the show a chance because of the length, it sounds like Season 12 failed to get the viewership metrics Netflix wanted to see. Fewer new, unique viewers and more people who were playing the show on repeat. Then we hit the interesting part. The “concept” of the season will be different.

What concept? The concept where Kinga is continuing her family’s experiment to gain their approval? The concept where Kinga was a reluctant mad scientist -in-training? The concept where the point of the experiments was to sell out to Disney for big money? The concept where the point was to blow up the MST3K brand and make it a household name? All of these are concepts Joel said were major parts of last season. This is intriguing...what direction will Season 12 take, and how will it get there? How will it be “warped” (read: totally changed) and “written to encourage binge watching”? Well, the encourage binge watching part hints very strongly at a continuing storyline, where each episode has to be seen in order to make sense and you have to watch all of them to understand what’s going on.

Will the same fans who dislike Season 8 because Sci-Fi forced a storyline onto a show that didn’t need it dislike Season 12 because Netflix is forcing changes to a show that doesn’t need them?

Yup, that’s what this section of the update is doing, and in all sincerity credit to Joel for putting the spin on it he is. This is Covering Your Ass 101. Without saying it explicitly, Joel has told the fans that Netflix is behind the changes to Season 12, and that you can blame the dreaded “Executive Meddling” instead of him if you don’t like the result. And it’s working! So far what most people are focusing on is the six episodes part, and the comments make it clear they believe it Netflix’s fault for only funding six episodes because they don’t support or believe in the show. Well, if fans expected more than 10 episodes tops from a Netflix season that’s unrealistic wishing. I personally thought between 8 and 10, but six isn’t out of line. Focusing on the amount of episodes right now is the only thing concrete most fans have, unless they’re willing to do the deeper analysis. And honestly, we don’t know if Netflix said you’re only doing six episodes, or if Joel is only making six episodes because that’s all he can get out of the funds he was given. (The only behind the scenes info I have on this is a rumor from someone who allegedly has a friend at Netflix that the negotiations did NOT go smoothly last year between Official MST3K and Netflix, and that boy! Season 12 is VERY important, make or break time.) As for getting the season out more quickly because it’s shorter, I’ll take that at face value, but with the knowledge that Joel suffers from terminal lateness in pretty much everything he’s involved in. It’s not out of line to think they put some strict deadlines into the contract. It certainly doesn’t promise, as some fans have been quick to latch onto, that future seasons of MST3K will be released once or even twice a year.

14 episodes was a lot of episodes. It would be really nice if you have at least the same amount of studio time, maybe even more, to shoot 6 episodes worth of content instead of 14. I hope the increased focus results in a show that addresses the problems and criticisms the fans brought up about Season 11. But someday would you let the fans in on what the whole picture is, too?

Hoo-boy. I talked about this yesterday, so I’m not going to rehash it here. But again, the spin is dizzying. “We’re going to offer you a chance to give us money (for no specified reason) because you guys WANTED to have a chance to give us more money!” Seriously? That’s going to work? Well, yeah, of course it’s going to work. There’s a huge chunk of the fanbase that has plenty of disposable income to throw at Joel because he makes them feel all fuzzy warm inside or something. Just look at how the elite backers are treated compared to the rest of the fanbase. Money determines your worth now as an MST3K fan, and no, I’m not the only person out there who’s noticed.

Again, you don’t ask for money unless you need money for something. I’ll be a lot more forgiving of Joel, and might even apologize for jumping to conclusions, if the rewards offered to the customers are reasonably priced. After all, we don’t have to fund a new season this time, because it’s been funded by Netflix. So you don’t need to ask for $100 for a six episode season box set or $75 bucks for a tote bag or $7500 for a bot puppet now, right?

Right?

(This is my inner bitter bitch speaking, but remember how I complained we only hear from Joel in the past year when he’s trying to sell the fans something? When he’s asking for money? Hmmm.)

Hey, you know, we screwed up fulfilling the reward from the last fundraiser big time, so much so that it’s over two and a half years later and we have NO IDEA when the coffee table book is going to get released, and we have NO IDEA why some of you didn’t get the stuff you paid for, and we have NO IDEA why any of the screw ups happened (or at least we’re not going to tell you), but give us more of your money, because even though we’re going to do things pretty much the same way with a lot fewer people, you can trust us that everything will go perfectly this time. (But don’t expect us to lower the prices any. We couldn’t do that. Even though we don’t need the money. At all. Nope, nothing to see here.) Anyway, that’s all icky business stuff so I don’t care about it. I don’t know why you people are so concerned over not getting what you paid for and were promised, anyway. Can you just finish it up for once and for all so we can move on and forget this happened?

You have so much more. Like all that behind-the-scenes stuff you promised to share April 14, 2017. I really can’t wait to see that, Joel. No, I can’t wait, because I’ve given up all hope of you meaning anything you say. This whole update is one of the greatest exercises in conveying intended meanings without actually saying anything that one can be pinned down on I’ve ever seen. It’s a masterpiece of laying groundwork, shifting blame, and ass-covering. No wonder it took months to come out with this.

TL;DR: "I loved it! It was much better than Cats! I'm going to see it again and again!"

#mst3k #mst3k the return #mst3k discourse #fandom wank #i do hope season 12 doesn't suck for the sake of the fans who love the reboot #but it's all so disingenuous #all fandoms have limits

13 notes · View notes

mst3kproject · 6 years

Photo

409: Indestructible Man

Both this movie and last week's MUZ have an appearance by the Angel's Flight Trolley in Los Angeles, which climbs a steep hill and makes the news every ten years or so when somebody dies on it. They're the only two MST3K movies that show it, and it doesn't actually mean anything that I happened to watch them one after the other. It's just an interesting coincidence and I thought I'd mention it. Anyway.

After Charles 'the Butcher' Benton is executed by gas chamber, mad scientist Dr. Bradshaw procures his corpse for an experiment. Exactly what the experiment in question was supposed to do the movie never tells us, but what it actually does is bring Benton back to life as an indestructible killing machine! He promptly sets out to find and murder the former associates who turned state's evidence on him and sent him to the gas chamber in the first place, leaving a trail of destruction in his wake. The police investigate this new crime spree, only to find that all the evidence points to the impossible conclusion that the culprit is a man who is already dead!

This could have been a really interesting movie, but it wasn't. A story about a criminal brought back from the dead could explore ideas about the afterlife, about morality, about what to do with such a rare second chance. Having a scientific rather than a supernatural motivation for his ressurection could also be cause to examine the biological nature of life and death and its relationship with the spiritual and philosophical meanings we layer onto it. Indestructible Man doesn't bother with any of that, though. All it wants to be is the world's cheapest monster movie. Who needs special effects when you can just zoom in real close on a very sweaty Lon Chaney Jr?

So instead of anything thought-provoking we get a story told to us by dickhead dick Dick Chasen, who does this annoying Dragnet narration to exposit things that could be better delivered by action and dialogue. He's supposed to be our protagonist but we're never interested in what's happening to him because his situation is never nearly as interesting as Benton's has the potential to be. I don't think the movie wants us to root for Benton, but we end up feeling like we know him a lot better than we do Chasen, through the simple magic of Show-Don't-Tell. Chasen's character development is him sitting in a car telling a woman his life story. The things he's saying aren't particularly interesting, nor is his voice or the visuals that accompany the scene – in fact it's so dull it nearly brought Joel to tears! Benton, however, actually does things to show us who he is, which is much more powerful even when the character is mute, and the things he does humanize him far more than Chasen's less-than-heartfelt speech about police work.

Chasen's motivation in the movie is to find the missing money – this is just part of his work, and he wants to be thorough. There's nothing personal riding on it for him, and therefore it's not very compelling. Benton's motivation is revenge. He's mad as hell at the three accomplices who squealed on him, and everything he does after his resurrection goes towards the goal of taking them by surprise and making good on his jailhouse revenge threat. This anger alone constitutes more convincing emotion than Chasen shows in the whole movie. When Chasen is frustrated, he talks boringly about it. When Benton is frustrated, he breaks necks. The writers probably figured we'd respect Chasen as somebody who keeps his emotions under control, but Casey Adams is a crummy actor so we just don't believe in those emotions, period.

What makes Benton's revenge plot even more appealing is that his intended victims, Joe, Squeamy, and Lowe, are also terrible people. For starters, Squeamy and Joe are thieves and killers as well, and before we even meet them we've already learned that they turned on a friend so they wouldn't have to give him his share from their last heist. The script takes some trouble to drive home that this was shady even by criminal standards – Squeamy is unable to find work as a safe cracker anymore, because others figure that what he did to Benton he's likely to do to them too. Then there's Lowe, who was supposed to be Benton's attourney but did a half-assed job because Joe and Squeamy bribed him. He's also firmly in the Douchebag Box. It's hard not to take a side in this revenge plot, and the side we take is definitively Benton's.

Benton isn't even all bad. Among the people he does not kill is his ex-girlfriend, Eva Martin. Indeed, it seems that he cared about her very much, even after she rejected him romantically – enough to leave her a map to the missing money! I remember when I first saw this episode, I spent the whole movie waiting for Eva to get carried off and need rescue but it didn't happen, and apparently the reason is simply because Benton respects her! Indeed, he respects her a hell of a lot more than Chasen does – at the end Chasen goes and tells her boss she quit, because he's about to propose to her and doesn't want to give her the option of saying no! The scene makes it hard to believe that the script was written by two women.

Aside from that one scene, though, writers Vy Russel and Sue Dwiggins also treat Eva with a great deal of respect. Not only is she never the damsel in distress (in fact, by trying to warn Joe and Squeamy that Benton is still alive, she actually serves a plot purpose outside of falling in love with Chasen! How about that?), she is not condemned for working at a Burlesque! She explains how she ended up in that business and that she stays at it because it's a reliable job and she makes good money. She's on good terms with her co-workers and they support one another when their boss is being a jerk. I've seen way worse depictions of strippers in much more recent movies.

Now about the title. I have from time to time taken issue with these movies and their inaccurate or misleading titles. Examples are many and familiar at this point and I shouldn't need to repeat them. Indestructible Man ends with Charles 'The Butcher' Benton dying all over again, so is its title just another lie? I am going to say no! There's a big difference, after all, between 'dead' and 'destructed'. Benton stays true to his title by being one but not the other! The cops hit him with a bazooka, which clearly causes him a lot of pain but doesn't leave a mark – his actual death happens by electrocution, which fries his brain but doesn't destroy his body. So for all that sucks about this ending, I can't actually complain about the title!

What does suck about this ending is that it's a complete accident! The movie has to end with Benton's death, of course, because even if he's a fairly sympathetic villain he is still definitely the villain of the story. In a better movie, even a better movie made in the 50's, the process that resurrected Benton ought to have been the key to killing him again – even with Bradshaw and his assistant dead, the police could find his notes and make something of them to destroy the indestructible man. Instead, however, we get the accident with the gantry and the power cable, which seems like the equivalent of the lightning strike in The Mad Monster or the garbage truck in Blood Feast. Nobody could figure out how to end the movie properly, so they ended it with a coincidence. As in those other examples, it feels like cheating.

Back at the beginning of the review I observed that this story could have explored ideas of life and death but didn't. When I think about it, I suspect it was something that came up during the writing process and was deliberately avoided. Leaving aside life, the movie doesn't even get very deep into death, which is kind of interesting in itself because it makes Indestructible Man a rather heathen movie. There is no hint that Benton experienced anything between his death in the gas chamber and his resurrection on Bradshaw's slab, not even anything so cliché as the tunnel of light and the voice telling him his time's not up (or whatever the opposite is for people who are going to hell). His threat to his associates from death row, that he will get them somehow or other, suggests that he had some kind of premonition he would come back... but this isn't explored either, and might well be empty bluster on Benton's part.

I'm guessing that having been hired to write a silly sci-fi detective movie, Russel and Dwiggins explicitly decided that the story didn't have the time (or the production the money) to get into the metaphysics of the situation. This is actually kind of a problem, since upon learning that a man has come back from the dead, the first thing anybody's going to ask him is what he experienced. If they had Benton give an answer, it would need further exploration – and if they had him say nothing, it might anger their assumed-to-be-Christian audience. Therefore they chose to make Benton mute, so that no answer could be given. This serves the intended purpose, certainly, but as I observed above, it also ruins any chance of the story meaning anything even without going into the meaning of life. A man who can't talk can't introspect in a way the audience is privy to.

If you want a movie that ressurects a criminal and actually has him re-examine his life and confront ideas about mortality and morality... I'm afraid that's All Dogs go to Heaven. This, sadly, is just The Indestructible Man.

#mst3k #reviews #indestructible man #50s #allow me to recommend a better movie #everybody do the zombie stomp

31 notes · View notes

scrawnydutchman · 7 years

Text

Why Craig McCracken is a Genius

Anybody who follows my work as well as my most frequent postings and discussions knows that I LOVE animation. I sincerely and confidently say it is the greatest art form in the world, simply because in one way or another it’s every art form combined. It’s drawing, painting, acting, film making, special effects, literature and music all at the same time, and while cartoons get the unfortunate shove as being nothing more then non-intellectual “kid’s stuff”, the field has produced some of the finest achievements in art of the 20th century as well as the 21st so far. But much like any art form, the field is only as great as it’s artists and what they bring to the table. There are many great animators and animation directors that any enthusiast can point to for inspiration like Rebecca Sugar, Lauren Faust, Genndy Tartakovsky, Don Bluth, Tex Avery, Chuck Jones, Hayao Miyazaki, Sitoshi Kun, and of course the most obvious answer Walt Disney. While I have great admiration and nothing but respect for the artists above, I’d like to take a moment to appreciate the genius of the man behind the shows I bring with me throughout my childhood and even adult life. The creator of such shows as Powerpuff Girls (which incidentally he collaborated with Faust and Tartakovsky on), Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends and Wander Over Yonder, Craig McCracken.

Make no mistake; there is a reason this man is so heavily respected and regarded in the current landscape of western animation, and you know a McCracken cartoon when you see them. But what exactly makes his work stand out? What is it about the cartoons McCracken has produced and directed that makes it so accessible to such a wide audience of kids and to an extent adults? How is it that whenever I put on an episode of Fosters or Wander Over Yonder I’m immediately put in a good mood and am enthusiastic about life? Well, after watching and studying his work I think I can boil it down to a few elements which, incidentally I’ve mentioned in previous blog posts before.

1. Beautifully Simple Character Design

Aesthetically speaking, what do the Powerpuff Girls, Bloo from Fosters Home and Wander all have in common? The answer of course is that they are deceptively simple designs that all take a very minimalist approach. So many household names from cartoons are memorable but their designs can often be so complex that if one were to try and draw them from memory, even as a skilled cartoonist, they’d have just enough trouble that they may forget a few key aspects of the design. With McCracken’s designs you can draw them likely in less then 2 minutes, especially ol’ Bloo from Fosters Home. You just draw a little pac man ghost with little flipper arms, circular eyes, a grin and a straight line at the bottom and you’re done. One might think these designs are very limited because of how minimalist they are with how you can express them, and if you’re feeling particularly like a snobby Jackass you might call it lazy. But in truth these design choices are the most practical you can get as they give you all the essentials of the character with nothing superfluous. First, because of how quickly you can draw them by that very nature they are also SEVERAL times easier to animate, and with the added aid of glorious modern day technology (when it’s not crashing that is) producing high quality entertainment quickly has never been easier. Second, all the essential parts of the character are there. Each character in a show is a distinctive shape not replicated by any other character, meaning that if you were to put them in a silhouette you could easily recognize who is who. Also, the whole art of animation is expressing character and personality through motion, which is where the acting part of the field comes in. Just by mannerisms, typical distinctive poses and even the very nature of their walk cycles we know exactly what kind of person each character from these shows is. We know the Powerpuff Girls are only innocent on the surface level and in truth are actually quite violent and gruesome (unless you’re watching the new horrendous show that completely misses the point of what makes the original so great), we know Bloo from Foster’s Home is a mischievous egotistical little trickster who is always causing trouble and we know Wander is a happy go lucky optimist who only seeks to bring happiness to all. Sometimes the best way to go is to not think too hard about it and let the main points of the character come through with no additions holding them down or distracting from the point.

2. Creative Yet Broad Show Premises

*This is my new favorite Gif*

I have to imagine each one of these shows had beautifully smooth pitches to get them funded (except maybe Powerpuff Girls because of the violence) because they have such imaginative and original premises that can be summed up so quickly to anyone who wants to watch and they leave themselves open to so many different types of stories.

*A boy visits his Imaginary Friend at a Foster Home where he and many other Imaginary Friends go on all sorts of hijinx or adventures, along the way saying goodbye to imaginary friends who find a new home*

*a superhero parody where a bunch of seemingly innocent and adorable little girls are actually quite violent and aggressive, and the show plays off of superhero stereotypes while also challenging typical gender roles*

Done. Great simple premise with unique concept not explored before. Take my money.

I’ve said before that it’s important for a show to have an easy to grasp premise, especially for children, because the easier it is to understand the more accessible it is to a larger audience. Plus because of the broad nature of the summary you can tell any kind of story you want between episodes. Premises like these have story ideas that just write themselves; it’s why the family sitcom of middle class family with idiot father and hot overcompensating wife exist, because everyone can relate to having a family and the dichotomy of a couple where one is the straight man putting up with the ceaseless antics of the other. Wander Over Yonder is a particularly good example of this because quite honestly all you need to know is “A couple of do-gooders wander the galaxy making new friends and incidentally run into an incompetent arch enemy a lot”. It’s basically just Road Runner but it takes place on a new planet every episode.

3. Color!!!!

Craig McCracken KNOWS how to use color. It gives all of his shows such a warm inviting feeling because it’s all so bright and either blends nicely or makes decent contrast. This may seem like a minor point, but You’d be amazed how quickly a bad color palette can ruin a show for an audience. the color choices of these shows immediately attract the attention of the viewer with it’s positive vibes and satisfying placement. Plus each character has a color scheme appropriate to their personality (or more accurately they contrast, appropriating a common theme in McCracken’s work; polar opposites hanging out with each other). The goodhearted reasonable and well behaved Mac is red, but his mischievous trouble making fun loving imaginary friend Bloo is, well . . . . blue. The happy-go-lucky Wander is orange, but his logical and pragmatic best friend and steed Sylvia is blue. The leader Blossom is pink, the innocent Bubbles is baby blue and the tough tomboy Buttercup is green. They remain consistent with these choices and much like the contrast of these characters physical appearance it makes it all the more apparent that the characters themselves contrast too.I don’t know what else to say about it, but just TELL me you don’t watch the intro to Fosters Home and get all hyped up in the process!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZiB_S9VpiU

4. Surrealist Humor

One thing you’ll notice about these shows is that they aren’t afraid to be weird, Fosters especially. They take every chance they can get to have something surreal happen only to play it off moments later like it never happened. I think that’s always been a great strength of McCracken’s shows. A huge part of comedy is playing with expectations: nobody ever gets a laugh out of something predictable. But another great and common aspect of comedy is stark, jarring contrast. I once read a WONDERFUL book called The Humor Code by Joel Warner and Peter McGraw, that was all about studying what makes people laugh, and they brought up a theory in the book that comedy is all about violation + benign. Something is jarring to our senses but we quickly find out it’s actually nothing to be afraid of. Hence why being tickled by someone we love makes us laugh: it’s a violation of our personal space, but we know our loved one wouldn’t actually hurt us. But it wouldn’t be funny if we tickled ourselves because it’s not a violation, and it isn’t funny with someone you don’t trust tickles you because the violation isn’t benign. This can also happen in reverse: something that initially lowers our defences turns out to actually be harmful or annoying or bother us in some way. I’m not necessarily saying this is the be all and end all of comedy as it’s only a theory, but I think you could apply it to McCracken’s work. His cartoons are littered with moments where a character does something strange or random or out of the ordinary and nobody bats an eye, or maybe it’ll shift in perspective about how large the situation at hand is. An immediate example that comes to my mind is the episode of Wander where a planet is attacked on a huge scale by a destroyer of planets called “Buster” . . .which actually when you zoom out it turns out it’s an adorable little puppy just playing with a ball. Humor is largely subjective, but if you ask me . . that shit is funny.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZ5QRrAosQo

Conclusion

McCracken

has been making numerous contributions to the field of animation throughout his career and has gained notoriety for the shows under his belt . . and rightfully so. He understands pure and simple what cartoons are all about: simple, down to earth, easy to access entertainment that’s fun and leaves you in a good mood. Some television can be considered junk food like reality tv shows (cheap to produce, quick to make, advertised well but loaded with garbage), and others can be considered fruits and veggies like Breaking Bad or The Simpsons (they make you a better person and challenge your sensibilities), but sometimes all you really need is a light simple snack. One that’s colorful, sweet, and maybe even a little nutritious. McCracken delivers in his work with original premises, accessible characters, bright inviting colors and a delightfully weird sense of humor. God bless ya, Mr. McCracken!

#animation #Cartoon network #Disney #Cartoons #craig mccracken #powerpuff girls #fosters home for imaginary friends #wander over yonder #genius #animators #animators on tumblr #art #cartoon

210 notes · View notes

scuttleboat · 7 years

Note

Do you ship jonerys? The incest thing doesn't bother me too much tbh, but they seem so boring and predictable as a couple. It felt inevitable that they were gonna hook up, but it doesn't feel like they'd ever last. They're too different imo. And the love scene didn't really help their case. It lasted all of 15 seconds (vs missandei/greyworm's long ass scene) and had shitty lighting. And Jon's intentions seem v unclear tbh. He's acting dodgy and reserved, vs dany who's kind of opened up to him.

I’m kinda… ‘eh?’ on Jon shipping? In concept, I like both jonerys and jonsa. Tbh I know more jonsa shippers so my inclination might be slightly that direction…I think in terms of relationship styles, that appeals to me more in this story. But I haven’t read fic for either pairing. I’ve reblogged gifsets for both I think.

For me, GoT isn’t one of my shipping fandoms. I broadly like or have opinions on different pairings, but it’s not a /fandom/ fandom for me. Meaning I’m not inclined towards an OTP or towards fanfic. I think I read maybe 3 Arya/Gendry fics in the last 6 years. But I still get into screen pairings as a viewer. I like watching Sansa/Jon and Sansa/Tyrion. I like Jaime/Cersei and Jaime/Brienne. I really want Arya and Gendry to reunite. I liked Shae and Tyrion before they ruined it with shitty writing. Jon and Daenerys are two gorgeous people and I started this season being pumped to see them together, to see if it sparked my interest.

Answer: still ‘ehh’. I think it started off being written in a way that I had trouble connecting with, which I admit disappointed me. I feel like the version we got for the start of s7 was the most… uninteresting version of this pairing. It’s literally just them standing beside each other and that’s it. With some actor pairings, that’s all you need (Joel McHale and Allison Brie for example.) With Jon and Dany, we needed a bit more. I just needed SOMETHING extra to make it come alive. What if they’d met as children somehow? What if they’d been writing letters for the last two seasons planning an alliance? What if they’d met on the battlefield? What if he’d saved her life during their first conversation? I JUST NEED SOMETHING MORE.

That being said, I did like it more the second half. I thought the scene in the boat where he committed to her was wonderfully performed, and I totally bought it. I also think their sex scene was hot, and well placed in the episode. Moon of the north, wowsa. The actors have chemistry when they’re given the right material; I think it’s only that early in the season that material wasn’t interesting enough.

Right now, I kind of want them to be happy together because I like both characters and I would enjoy it if they triumphed together in the face of a cruel and caustic world. I think they’re both good people who try their best to protect others, and it makes sense to me that they’d be attracted to someone who embodies similar hopes and values. And they’re hot.

So… I guess in the show, I do ship them. They’re happening, anyway, and I’d rather they find happiness and peace and partnership than not find it. I’ll probably reblog stuff. But they’re not my one true pairing.

I don’t know about him being suspicious, I think Dany just seems more open because she’s actually a more open and emotional character than he is. Jon is a brooding taciturn bore sometimes. He’s very much a stoic archetype, albeit he’s been getting better since he died.

(Note: this also runs into the issue where I spent most of the books and show being indifferent to Jon and finding his story the most frustrating and boring on the show. When he died in the books I was so happy to be done with the fucking wall. Since the show brought him back I *have* been enjoying him a lot more. Probably because he’s seeing new people and doing new things, finally. And I’m broadly invested in all the characters, cuz I’m a fan. But you’ll never find me raising my voice about what female character can love Jon better. I, like, don’t care. The show doesn’t care. Jon doesn’t even care.))

Dany… I think she’d be fine without him, but I also think she’s lonely and craves love, that just seems like part of her character. So finding a decent man who is a) close to her political level, b) has integrity, c) that she’s attracted to, and d.) will stand up for her and keep his promises… Dany’s gonna be into that. Tho I think she’d also benefit from having a female lover, especially if that takes the pressure off her to keep romance and politics separate.

#game of thrones #jon snow #daenerys targaryen

4 notes · View notes

satelliteofmstielove · 7 years

Text

K19 Hangar 18

Aliens or something, I don’t know

General notes

I always remember that this movie is K19 because it’s Hangar 18 and that for some reason strikes me as mildly funny. From the title I expected it to be about airplanes, but it’s actually about spaceships. Made in 1980, starring people from things. Nothing really to note about the episode. Everyone’s here for the whole thing this time, so let’s get a-rollin’.

Prologue

Joel pops up from under the desk sounding like he hit his head.

No real intro this time, no Mads. Joel just tells us the name of the movie and we go straight into Movie Sign. Maybe they were pressed for time this week.

Movie pt. 1

I can’t tell when the guys get into the theater because the version I’m watching is such bad quality. Any black backgrounds make it impossible to see the guys. Later on they started putting a slight filter on the movies to make the silhouettes stand out better.

At 3:22, Joel asks why made-for-TV movies always look different than normal movies. Tom informs him, correctly, that Hangar 18 was shown in theaters. Why is that, actually? It is related to how they’re shot? There’s even a difference in look between different types of TV shows, so I assume that’s why. Does anyone want to inform both me and 1989 Joel?

When the movie astronauts are checking switches and things on the space shuttle at 5:39, Crow asks Joel if he remembered to check their switches and things. Joel doesn’t answer. Several seconds later at 5:47, Servo asks him the same thing, and he says no. Servo seems slightly distressed but lets it be.

Crow’s comment about the movie satellite makes Tom/Josh laugh at 7:26.

Joel messes with the on-screen controls at 7:43, but again, you can barely see him.

Something about Crow’s incredulous tone at 9:10 is really funny.

When you can finally see them, Joel and bots look like they’re sitting closer together than usual.

At 9:54, Joel makes a joke about prune-flavored Tang, and Josh laughs mockingly at it.

So far this whole movie has been half black screens. VHS movie played on UHF TV x old VHS recording + YouTube upload = hard to see.

76° at 6:13, when the time and temperature come up at 12:46. Looks like the Twin Cities are making their way toward summer.

Tom calls commercial at 13:25, Jeopardy-style, and Joel commands it more forcefully at 13:31. They don’t fade out until 13:38, though.

Joel reads the setting caption at 13:47, and Crows remarks a bit petulantly that he can read.

Holy crap, those are big lights on that police car. Also, why does this guy have such a strong Southern accent when they’re in Arizona? And I’m already sick of these captions.

As they leave the theater, Crow says he wants a soda, as if that’s the reason they’re leaving. Servo says he wants some saltines.

Host Segment 1

Crow’s wiggly fidgeting is cute. He’s such a little kid in the first few seasons.

Joel tells Crow he’ll need to borrow some of his RAM chips later to increase computing power for some other part of the ship. He doesn’t explain which, but maybe it would be common knowledge for Crow. Apparently, a dangerous meteor shower that could puncture holes in the ship is heading their way, and somehow the extra RAM chips with help with that? Maybe he can use it to increase the ship’s shields (which may or may not exist), or maybe he needs it to calculate a course away from the meteors or something. By the way, is it still called a meteor shower if it’s in space?

The bots have been really into irritating Joel in the past few episodes, and the trend continues here with Crow asking “Why?” and “So?” to everything Joel says. At first he seems sincere, but it quickly becomes clear that he just wants a reaction. It’s not clear if Joel catches on, but either way, he continues patiently explaining.

I love it whenever the bots cuddle up to Joel. Crow seems to know it’s cute and is using to his advantage.

Joel mentions that if he dies from lack of oxygen, the bots with have no human to play Parcheesi with, and implies that always ends badly. Having seen how the bots get along when Joel’s not around, I can imagine how that goes.

Mid-morning pleasure stimulation? Okay…I mean, I’m sure that’s not weird but it sounds weird.

Crow finishes off the whole thing with the classic “Daddy, what’s Vietnam?” and laughs, telling Joel to lighten up. Joel does not think it’s funny and finally snaps. Joel’s interesting; he’s almost impossible to rile, but once riled, he’s got something of a temper. You can see it in segments like his attempted barbershop/soda fountain in Giant Gila Monster [402] and the end of Castle of Fu Manchu [323]. Here he actually tells Crow to go get his belt! I can’t tell if he’s really going to use it on Crow or if he’s just playing along with Crow’s game by being the angry dad. Hope it’s the latter.

Similarly, I can’t tell if Crow’s reaction is real or if he’s still just in little kid mode. Again, I hope the latter is true.

Movie pt. 2

Crow is making sounds of pain as they come into the theater. Joel tells him to quiet down and Tom teases him and laughs about the ordeal. I guess he really did use the belt. That’s the not the right way to discipline your robot children, Joel.

He also seems to be fixing Crow’s arms or something. They are kinda flimsy.

At 29:57, Crow says something about a “safety seal” and Servo barks like a sea lion. Just made me laugh.

Joel says when he was in 4th grade, he had the same kind of biohazard suit from the movie at 30:31. I’d doubt it, but it’s not impossible, especially given that a) Joel’s weird and b) this show takes place in a version of reality where satellites, robots, and mad science are a pretty casual affair. So who knows? But Joel also says it didn’t have the big mask, so he might have just been talking about a regular raincoat. (Or maybe it was a joke, because riffing. But that’s no fun.)

30: 56- I love Crow’s straightforward approach to things, hahaha.

At 31:09, they’re talking about Meatloaf (the singer) and Crow mentions he likes ketchup on his meatloaf. It’s not related to the joke, but it makes me imagine tiny baby KTMA Crow trying to eat meatloaf at the table with his dysfunctional little arms, which is oddly adorable.

The aliens really do look like Uncle Fester…when the guys sing their version of the Addams Family song (at 36:43), you can hear all three of them snapping (well, at least two). The bots must be able to generate snapping noises.

At 39:20, Joel mentions “Joe Namath Netted Slingshot Briefs”, which become a running comment throughout the rest of the series, especially the Joel era. I’m not getting a picture for this one; I think the BVDs picture from the last entry was enough trauma for all of us.

Wow, mentions of Jackie Coogan and Tor Johnson back to back at 39:55. Little did they know then how many opportunities they would have to talk about Tor Johnson (so many episodes, including The Unearthly [320], Bride of the Monster [423], and The Beast of Yucca Flats [621]). By the time they got to Jackie Coogan (The Space Children [906]), though, none of these original three were there. Here’s a picture of Jackie Coogan for no reason.

Now this airport guy has like a half-Boston, half-Southern accent. Though it is in the southern half of the country, Arizona is not really The South, filmmakers.

At 44:49, Tom goes on making fun of the possibly-crazy airport guy for so long Crow mutters that Joel spanked the wrong bot. That prompts Servo to ask him how his “bot” is; Crow doesn’t respond.

Crow makes a zing! joke at 45:22, and Joel tells him to “take the laugh” like Dr. F told Larry in the previous episode. Crow says it hurts when he laughs, which makes me wonder how badly Joel spanked him with that belt. Oof. Tom also mentions that load pan-emptying will hurt later. The more I hear about load pans, the more I don’t want to know the details.

As they leave the theater, Crow says he need to get a pillow for some unspecified part of him.

Host Segment 2

Joel attaches what he calls a coupling device to Crow’s head so they can look through his memory and decide what’s worth keeping.

The first memory in the list is “On”. I’m not totally sure what that means, but I’m assuming it’s a necessary function. Maybe it’s the code that allows him to turn on?

Crow knows how to play Heart and Soul? I’d like to see that.

Nobody wants to go through “load pan training” again. My earlier sentiment about load pans has not changed. I would also like to see Tom and Crow’s bunk beds. What do you think the membrane that Crow mentions is? Apparently it’s less pleasant than load pans.

Nobody wants to keep the King Family specials.

They don’t feel like keeping a bunch of Highlights magazines, STP commercials with Mario Andretti, every episode of Punky Brewster, Lyle Waggoner’s penile implant show (???), Joe Something-or-Other’s business school (I wonder if that’s a local thing), Robert Vaughn’s Helsinki Formula, Aaron Gray’s cellulite show, or George Hamilton’s skin care hour. They do, however, want to keep a still of that one Farah Fawcett poster. I won’t bother to put a picture of that here because you’ve probably already seen it.

Joel smiles when Crow makes his buzzer noises.

He asks Crow where he picked up these weird infomercials, and Crow tells him he fell asleep while watching TV23 one night. It sounds like the Brains thought their channel played too many infomercials.

Movie pt. 3

I guess stunt driving isn’t part of the training to become a government agent. Also looks like their car was a Pinto.

The Apache Plaza Joel mentions at 58:03 was local mall in St. Anthony that was damaged by a tornado and then snowmelt. River Place is another spot in Minneapolis.

At 58:43, Crow notes that aliens have nipples like Joel does, as a human. Joel says his are a little more ”pouty.” I don’t know what that means, but ew.

Ah, thank you, movie, for cutting away instead of showing them cutting into the alien, proving once again that you are better than City on Fire. But you can really stop telling us where we are every single time we change locations. If the time is important, fine, put that, but if you’re just moving between places we’ve already been several times, you don’t need to tell us again.

Time and temp pop up again at 1:02:09, 75° at 7:15.

Tom calls commercial at 1:03:12.

Crow makes a good point at 1:05:44- why did it take them so long to even try to figure out where the government was hiding the ship?

Hey, a swear bleep at 1:08:45. The guys react to it, obviously knowing they would have to cut it out for the episode. Servo proceeds to make some “ship” jokes.

You know, these government agents would be a lot less conspicuous if didn’t wear suits everywhere. Also, even if the brakes don’t work, wouldn’t the car, you know, slow down if he stopped pressing the gas? Cars don’t just maintain momentum forever even if they can’t stop. And I’m already predicting this whole petroleum plant thing is going to explode in firey ball of death, killing the new set of G-men, while the astronauts get away.

Wow, Crow makes the same guess at 1:11:28.

Well, I was sort of right. Crow was more right than I was.

Crow’s little “c’mon, c’mon” as they leave the theater is adorable.

Host Segment 3

They’ve hooked Crow up to the coupling device again, and take a look at his first memory ever.

For some reason the memory isn’t from Crow’s point of view…Anyway, Joel sings a song while finishing Crow up, then whacks him lightly to turn him on. His first sound is a baby cry until Joel whacks him again. Joel tells him name and he asks why, and Joel tells him it stands for “Cybernetic Remotely Operated Woman.”

Current Crow is very surprised to find out he’s a woman, but seems to get over it very quickly.

Joel tells him he’s actually a hermaphrobot because he ran out of parts. Why would running out of parts mean that he had both- you know what, never mind.

I guess being a woman or hermaphrobot turns Crow into a stressed mother.

But it’s actually a joke anyway ha ha ha, Joel made a fake memory to tease him. Joel tells him that he only made him in the first place so he could play that joke on him in the future. Harsh, man. Joel’s kind of a big jerk in this episode.

Movie pt. 4

Hey, it’s the plot-relevant radio station, like Invention Exchange from Giant Gila Monster [402].

Crow makes another good point- will the people inside the spaceship survive? It didn’t get burnt up on re-entry when it landed, so maybe they will. OoooOOOOOoooo mystery….

At 1:34:31, Crow also makes a call-back to City on Fire [K16].

Oh, they did survive. Did the guys preview this movie, or are they just that eerily smart? Maybe one of them had seen it before in the past?

Conclusion

This segment is very short, just the guys mentioning that the fan club is almost up to 1,000 members, and showing off the fabulous demon dog that 1,000th member can win. They mention it’s from the opening credits. Demon dogs will show up again in the next season in The Robot vs. the Aztec Mummy [102].

Is Crow carrying something over his shoulder? I can’t tell what it is.

The credits cut off in this recording, so hopefully there was nothing terribly interesting or new.

Thoughts on the Movie

Forgive me the unkindness, but his movie is full of mostly rather ugly people. And Darren McGavin looks like the general from The Iron Giant, and/or Tommy Lee Jones. Which makes sense because the general from the Iron Giant looks like Tommy Lee Jones. Beyond that, I don’t know how I feel about this one. It’s really not that bad, it’s just sort of dumb. I feel like it would have made a more interesting television series than a movie. It has some good moments, but it felt like it was trying to tell two different stories. The longer the movie went on, the more it seemed to lose its focus. On the other hand, I actually cared some when Lou died, which is more than I can say for a lot of movies, even non-MSTed ones. Ending was kinda stupid, though.

The other main thing that kept bothering me was why the government kept letting the astronauts poke around and potentially muck up the their big cover-up. Why do they even let them out of D.C. or Houston or wherever they were? (I really should remember because of the excessive captioning.) Can’t the Feds just keep them where they are until they’re done lying about the U.F.O.? I mean, that doesn’t sound legal, but neither does tampering with and lying about important scientific information to keep people happy until the election, and they’re already doing that. Half the plot could have been avoided if they’d just been smart enough to stop Bancroft and Price from running around. I guess that’s why they didn’t. But that’s not a good enough reason to suspend my disbelief on that point.

Oh yeah, and then it gets into the tired old sci-fi trope of the aliens who are almost exactly like humans and trying to explain with actual science. I don’t have any real problem with human aliens in fiction (Superman, for example, has never bugged me), but when they try to pretend like it makes any sense, that’s where they always lose me. The whole “humans are descended from them” just doesn’t work for me. If the two species were able to breed, wouldn’t they have needed to be very similar to begin with? Then that brings us back to the parallel evolution thing, which makes very little sense in an attempt at hard sci-fi. So yeah, not quite a bad movie, just a mediocre one. It would probably make good material for a modern riff.

Review

This one was alright. It seemed like they were a little distracted by a semi-watchable movie, so there wasn’t much riffing. I didn’t laugh a whole lot during this episode (favorite riff- Tom: Maybe they’re just a couple of yahoos from Arkansas.) The spots they did riff had a lot of energy, but they seemed to lose it as the movie went on. Maybe the movie wasn’t stupid or infuriating enough to keep them firing. That’s another good reason they wrote and practiced the riffing when they moved on to the wonderful world of cable.

Not related to the review, but I have a question for my six or seven readers. I mentioned a lot more of my thoughts on the movie in the notes this time- is that annoying, or do you prefer it that way? I got back and forth about whether I should include that there. On the one hand, it’s part of the experience of watching and episode. On the other hand, it’s not really the purpose of this guide. I’ll do whatever works better for you guys, so let me know if you have a preference. Thanks!

#MST3K #KTMA #K19 #Hangar 18 #ACFGEG #This one was so much less of a slog than the last one

14 notes · View notes

a-reocurring-dream · 7 years

Text

“The only question is: HOW?” part 2

(The first part can be found here.)

A ridiculously high amount of new cases

In the beginning of TST, we are introduced to a ridiculously high amount of new cases. It is really hard to catch up on every one of them and figure out what they are about in detail, because, sometimes, they literally flash away, before one has even been able to read the excerpts showing up on screen. Two questions occurred to me:

What is the significance of all those new cases to the new season?

Why are they showing up so fast that the casual viewer is not really able to catch up on everything if they do not take the time to pause the episode?

So, I will be listing the transcripts of all cases mentioned in TST here at first:

FEMALE CLIENT: He drowned, Mr Holmes. (While the client sits on a dining chair, John’s later blog entry drifts across the screen reading:

Dusty Death I won’t name the client out of respect but she came to us because of her late husband. His body was recovered from the sea near Falmouth...

Sherlock is pacing back and forth in front of the fireplace, looking at his phone. John sits in his chair with Mary perched on the arm.) FEMALE CLIENT: That’s what we thought but when they opened up his lungs ... MARY: Yes? FEMALE CLIENT: Sand. SHERLOCK (looking at her for a moment): Superficial.

On another occasion Sherlock sits in his chair holding a pair of Mars binoculars to his eyes while he peers at a small plastic bag containing a dark pink item held in pieces of ice. [More details about the Mars binoculars here.] John’s blog entry drifts across the screen:

Mr Hatherley came straight round to Baker Street in a terrible state. He was white as a sheet and bleeding from an awful wound in his hand. Exactly how he came by this wound was at first confusing...

Still holding the binoculars in place over his eyes, Sherlock calls out. SHERLOCK: Come back! It’s the wrong thumb! (He lowers the binoculars and looks up but there’s nobody in the room, and now the downstairs front door slams shut.)

On another occasion photographs are scattered over the dining room table and the Mars binoculars lie on top of some of them. John’s blog entry reads:

The Duplicate Man How could Dennis Parkinson be in two places at the same time? And murdered in one of them? JOHN (standing at the table looking at the evidence): Sherlock ... SHERLOCK (rapidly typing on his phone): It’s never twins.

On another occasion Sherlock sits in his chair with his laptop open on his knees. He’s busy on his phone at the same time. Mary is sitting in John’s chair holding a mug and rubbing her tummy while John stands at the fireplace. SHERLOCK (quick fire): Hopkins, arrest Wilson. Dimmock, look in the lymph nodes. HOPKINS (offscreen, from the laptop speaker): Wilson?! DIMMOCK (offscreen, from the laptop speaker): Lymph nodes?! MARY: Sherlock ... (Sherlock is simultaneously Skypeing with Detective Inspectors Dimmock and Hopkins, who are separately looking into their mobile phone’s camera as they talk with him. The windows showing them are side by side on Sherlock’s laptop screen. Dimmock is walking along a road while Hopkins is indoors, possibly in her office.) SHERLOCK (quick fire, looking at Dimmock): Yes. You may have nothing but a limbless torso but there’ll still be traces of ink left in the lymph nodes under the armpits. If your mystery corpse had tattoos, the signs’ll be there. (John’s later blog entry appears under Dimmock’s Skype window and reads:

The Circus Torso A limbless body found decomposing inside a trunk in left luggage office in Waterloo station couldn’t be identified...

A second blog entry under Hopkins’ Skype window reads:

The Canary Trainer

Andrew Wilson was an unusual

man with an unusual hobby.

He seemed to have no connection

with the man whose life was so

abruptly ended one freezing night

in November...

DIMMOCK: Bloody hell! Is that a guess? SHERLOCK: I never guess. (He closes Dimmock’s screen.) MARY: Sherlock ... HOPKINS: So he’s the killer? The canary trainer? SHERLOCK: ’Course he’s the killer. HOPKINS: Didn’t see that coming. SHERLOCK: Hm, naturally.

On another occasion Sherlock walks across the room checking his phone while he talks to a man sitting on a dining room chair. SHERLOCK: The heart medication you are taking is known to cause bouts of amnesia. (John’s blog entry reads:

The Cardiac Arrest Joel Fentiman was found strangled in the bedsit he shared with his brother. They had always got on well and there was no sign that this situation had changed...

Mr FENTIMAN: Yes, um ... I think so. Why?

SHERLOCK (sitting down in his chair, still looking at his phone): Because the fingerprints on your brother’s neck are your own.

... we could never have known there was a potential assassin lurking close by. An assassin who turned out to be...

John giggles as he leads Sherlock up the stairs at Baker Street towards the living room. JOHN: A jellyfish?! SHERLOCK: I know. JOHN: You can’t arrest a jellyfish! SHERLOCK (looking at his phone as he climbs the stairs): Well, you could try. JOHN: We did try.

Much? Yes, when I first collected all of the cases, I was quite overwhelmed by the amount, too. And I wondered why there were so much. To show us that Sherlock, John and Mary are working together as a crime solving trio now? Well, in this case, one or two cases would have totally ensured that. But these are 8 new cases! This is by no means a clever way to make a statement about a relationship/potential love triangle whatsoever; the audience feels overchallenged to phrase it lightly, if not annoyed and confused. Personally, I was deeply concerned seeing Sherlock’s behaviour mirroring this:

a) always looking into his phone (heart) as if he is searching for a way to be distracted from everyone around him (especially John, it seems to me).

b) always multitasking and being totally restless.

Watching and knowing how he was acting throughout all the other seasons was kind of painful. He reminded me of a lost child that does not know how to act and therefore wants to distract from his flaws (”All hearts are broken. Caring is not an advantage.”). I remembered that TAB was the trigger of Sherlock’s humanisation. And I wondered at once: Is Sherlock trying to cope with his emotions, rushing below the surface in order to finally be spoken out, by intermixing everything with cases?

Anyway, I think that everyone will agree with me: This overdose of information thrown at the audience without any mercy does not indicate things to be healthy and balanced. It’s neither a clever move by the creators if not intended nor feeling anything but uncomfortable. We are left to the only logical conclusion: It is utterly done on purpose, and we should feel that things are on the verge of “out of control”.

Now, leaving the emotional effect aside and looking at it from an analytic point of view: What is the purpose of mentioning all of these cases? Mirroring. Sometimes it is quite vague, but I tried to figure out possible allusions:

“Dusty Death”: “Falmouth” may be reference to Ajay’s attitude towards Mary as a liar – “false mouth”. Death meaning heart-break; who broke someone’s heart that episode by using “so many lies”? Right: Mary. And John is the victim. The fact that the cause of death is not what it seems to be could be a hint that it is not really Mary’s lies and death that breaks John’s heart at the end of this episode.

Mr Hatherley’s case: This is direct reference to ACD’s The Adventure of the Engineer’s Thumb (summary here). It’s important to note that Holmes fails to bring the criminals to justice in this case. Mr Hatherley is an engineer who gets injured (cut off thumb) and is under threat, because he knows too much about a press he is hired to examine. One might also say: He did not just see, but observe, too, and that caused him to be in danger. Since “Hatherley” is presumably a mirror for Sherlock Holmes and - in TST - it is not Hatherley’s thumb Sherlock gets to see, it is a twisted way of the canon story and therefore an indicator that something is wrong with Sherlock as well; it also alludes to the way Sherlock is always troubled by his extraordinary observation skills, “causing” Mary’s “death” at the end of TST.

“The Duplicate Man”: “It’s never twins.” AGAIN. I am so bothered by this one. Why put it in there if there is no point in considering this option? Except it is the only plausible solution. I have been thinking about a twin series 4 for a while now, to be honest. It may be improbable, but I am willing to believe it, because it is not impossible. Another interpretation leads to EMP theory co-existing with John’s Bungalow and allusions to reality bleeding into dreams/the unreliable narrator.

“The Circus Torso” and “The Canary Trainer”: Because they are solved and popping up at the same time and sharing an acronym (TCT), I assumed that they are mirrors for one another. This one ties to the unreliable narrator and John’s Alibi theory: It may be far-fetched, but I think Andrew Wilson (TCaT) is a mirror for John Watson, because their last names share the first letter and are almost identical. When deciphered, it means this: John is unusual, because his “hobbies” are solving crimes and blogging about it. He is the one who kills Mary, though does not seem to have any connection to it. Nobody would have guessed it, because it appears to be improbable. Only Sherlock knows the truth. Additional information from TCiT: Since we know that Mary has a tattoo and the unidentified victim has one, too, we come to the conclusion that they are mirrors (meaning that Mary is actually dead). “Waterloo station” ties to the heavy water symbolism of series 4 (water represents calculation and lack of emotion), meaning it was a rational choice - by whomever committing the murder - to kill Mary off.

“The Cardiac Arrest”: Though short, this one will get quite long: This mirroring is appearing very often in “Sherlock”: one sibling killing/strangling the other (in TBB, Sherlock gets nearly strangled to death by a Mycroft-mirror; in TBB, Soo Lin, a Sherlock-mirror, is shot by her older brother Zha Zhu, said Mycroft-mirror; in TGG, Westy gets pushed to death by his brother-in-law; in TST, Ajay tries to shoot his so called “family” blood sister Mary). It could refer to future events as well as events that happened in the past. It is interesting that the killing brother is hinted to be unaware of his crime, because he cannot remember it (memory alteration by TD-12?). I am almost certain that this mirroring can only allude to two scenarios: a) Back in Sherlock’s past, Mycroft did something to Sherlock, which was so traumatising for him that his brain made him forget about it – like amnesia does. b) While Sherlock will be drugged and unaware of reality, he will kill Mycroft. “Families fall out.” (Ugh, that is not a nice thought.) There is another thought that crossed my mind: “Joel” is similar to “John” which could make him a John-mirror. Considering the fact that Joel was living with someone he always seemed to get along with well, but was murdered by without the murderer being aware of it, it could mean that Mr Fentiman is a mirror for Sherlock for he was Joel’s flatmate. This is foreshadowing for their heartbreakingly shattered relationship in series 4 (especially TLD): Without being aware of and culpable for it, Sherlock hurt John to the extent of a divide.

case about “a potential assassin lurking by”: Undoubtedly, this is reference to A.G.R.A. It could either refer to Mary having lied to John (maybe she is still alive, “lurking by” without being noticed by John and Sherlock? Like some people theorise about her being actually around Sherlock and John after faking her death in order to manipulate them by the use of TD-12 and by repeatedly stating that she is not actually there, although, sometimes, she is indeed present?) or Ajay who is after Mary.

“The Lion’s Mane”: “You can’t arrest a jellyfish!” And another canon story adapted in a weird and twisted way: Knowing ACD’s “The Lion’s Mane”, one is alarmed hearing John say this line. Why? Because: He was not present when the case took place. Throughout this particular case, Watson is absent and Holmes states that he misses his companionship. We do not get a real reason for his absence, but well, who knows. Anyway, Holmes walks on the beach, as he discovers a body. At first, everybody assumes it was murder, but Holmes figures out that it was a jellyfish that killed the man. More important, this case includes a sad mirror for Holmes: a complicated, unsociable, strange but highly intelligent man called Murdoc whose only friend was the victim of the jellyfish. Because nobody liked him, everybody assumed that he was the murderer at first. After the case is solved, Murdoc expresses his deep pain and bitterness over the loss of his friend, a Watson-mirror. The whole case is about Sherlock Holmes missing John Watson and being lost without him. Accordingly, it is impossible for John to be the one to talk about that case. Decoded: We should be alarmed; things are twisted and totally messed up here.

But not only in TST we get new cases; there is an additional one at the end of TLD:

SHERLOCK (offscreen, angrily): Get out! (In the living room of 221B Sherlock – now clean-shaven, with his hair back into the proper SherCurls and wearing his usual suit – grabs the door handle and angrily pulls it open.) MALE CLIENT: She’s possessed by the Devil! (The angle changes to look at the middle-aged man. Beyond him, the horns of the skull on the wall above the dining table look as if they’re coming out of either side of his head.) MALE CLIENT: I swear my wife is channeling Satan! SHERLOCK (crossly): Yes, boring. (He gestures towards the landing.) Go away! (Making an exasperated sound, the man storms out of the room. His wife follows, turning to Sherlock as she passes him.) WIFE (exasperated): I’m not channelling Satan! SHERLOCK: Why not, given your immediate alternative? (He slams the door shut, then turns and walks towards the kitchen but stops when he sees a piece of paper lying on the floor in front of the small table in the corner. It had been blocked from his view by a cabinet behind John’s chair. Frowning, he goes down onto one knee to pick it up. His eyes widen when he realises that it’s Faith’s note.)

(transcript taken from here)

At first glance, this whole thing appears to be a weird decision for a case important enough to be mentioned, I know. But this one is actually quite telling: The husband is accusing his wife of being the devil, though, in reality, he is the one being framed with devil horns a.k.a. evil; even Sherlock picks up on the reversed roles (”given your immediate alternative”).

(Note: a) Moriarty is referenced to being the devil many times throughout the show. b) Mary has been framed with devil horns in TSoT the same way this client is.)

Thus, it is actually the husband Mary being the problem in the relationship evil. But, does this mean that she is the real Moriarty?

No: “She can’t be the devil and the antichrist.”

John is referencing Rosie here; but, we get to know that Rosie and Mary share a name, so they might be well-constructed mirrors. We know that Moriarty is the devil. Therefore, the only option that is left for Rosamund Mary is being the antichrist. And, in case you do not know what the antichrist is: He is a figure framing himself as the messiah and sort of claiming that Jesus is not the messiah, though the antichrist is actually an egoistic, manipulative psychopath (hello, Mary, that sounds quite a bit like you!). We clearly know: Mary is not the messiah, because it is already Sherlock taking that role.

In the end, it is Sherlock fighting Mary, then? And does John’s line mean that Mary and Moriarty are in cahoots and have created this mess together?

(More following in the next days.)

12 notes · View notes